#fun fact i actually knew about and loved this song before shrek cause my mom went to high school with them

[yuri-alexseygaybitch]

Hey don't cry, second verse of "All Star" by Smash Mouth ok?

[riverroan]

Girlsies hcs i can think of and worked on at 11-12 AM last night

fun fact before we start: Kathrine (Joesph’s daughter) actually died in 1884. Who knew?

Kathrine Pulitzer

Lesbian

Her favorite show is The End of the Fxxxing World

“I’m so gay for alyssa like wtf?”

“We know kath”

She and Spot are saltmates

“Hey, madison? Who sings that song?”

“Bruno Mars”

“Please let him sing it”

Legit when he’s doing hw

“Kath, stfu. I’m trying to think”

“Yeah i know i can see steam”

After Spot finally gets a bf

“Gross”

“I mean at least i can get someone but yeah, me too”

“ BL OCK ED”

Jack and Kathrine have dated before

She was confused

He was helping

Chaotic Good™

She fucking loves her siblings and they all accept her

“What a lovely day to be-”

“Gay”

All six of them say it at once

Her mom’s chill with it

Dad not so much

He doesn’t shame her

But he isn’t gonna try and force her to be straight cause honey he knows she’s deep into the gay hell hole

She wears buns constantly

Also when she doesn’t wear makeup she looks like a goddess

“Wow you should stop wearing makeup more often. I may actually go straight for once”

“Fuck off spot”

Whenever she and sarah finally get together

“well my saltmate and my best friend are together who would’ve figured.”

“Spot leave my lesbian ass alone you gay irish boy”

Cuddles

Kathrine is very loveable and anyone who says otherwise gets beat by the guys

Doesn’t matter how they get beaten

Just know these boys cherish their girls to death

Even if they’ve known them for an hour

“Wow ily to death tf”

Specs and Kathrine and the bestest friends ever okay

They have a treat yo self day

Whether it’s small or big

They will legit have a blast

Specs came out to her as pan after watching Deadpool

“Wow can you believe me a Deadpool have something in common?”

“What?”

“Being pan”

When she figured out she was the first person he came out to she felt amazing

She went home and told her mom everything about it

Her mom was pumped up for her daughter

Specs and Kathrine went to homecoming as friends together and left with their own dates

Specs and romeo

Kathrine and some chick named caitlin

Kathlin didn’t last too long

Turns out caitlin was moving

Theyre still great friends

ANYWAY

Specs told her about his crush on romeo

“He’s just so sweet and funny and ughhhhhhhh”

“I feel ya babe”

Then at homecoming they hooked up

Still together to this day

Kath loves their relationship

She calls them goals

Then in eleventh she got with Sarah

Theyre actually the oldest of the group

Her favorite artist is Dua Lipa

Why?

She’s a queen

Why else?

Shes in debate team

Also the school news

She wishes they had a newspaper but they wanted to be more “Advanced”

Also she knows whether she’ll win an arguement

She can just tell by the way the other person holds themselves

If she knows she lost she’ll nod her head respectfully and go on

She doesn’t let that get to her though

Her favorite subject is ela

Only really big musical she likes is DEH she hates the others

“Why watch some musical of the Heathers when there’s the original movie right here?”

Sarah Jacobs

Her fave subject is math

“Why are gays supposed to hate math?”

She and spot are besties

“I wish stars were out in the day too”

“You’re doing a lousy job as a lesbian if you don’t know girls already exist”

“Are you sure you’re gay?”

These two dated

It was because spot was confused

“Well this was fun, but i like guys more you’re the best love youuuuu”

She also dated jack

“Isn’t that awkward? Dating one brother then six months later go out with the other?”

“No”

“Jack you dumb fuck, haven’t you learned she has no shame don’t question my lesbian best friend and her logic”

She’s not too sure what she’s into honestly

Like holy shit guys are caring and their hands feel great

But like,,, girls are amazing

Spot just calls her a lesbo as a joke

Her fave youtuber is Macdoesit

“We worship queens in this household”

The jacobs’ already knew their first two kids were gay

They don’t care how any turn out as long as they finish school and live happy, healthy lives

They don’t have the time of day to tell them they’ll “go to hell” for being in love with whoever they want since they should be happy

That’s all that matters

“Hey mom, dad, i think i’m bi”

“Cool when you gonna bring a boy or girl over so we can meet them?”

Also after Sarah and Jack broke up Jack started dating Davey after dating another dude after Sarah (it was like two years later)

“isNt tHAt AwkWARd?? dAtiNg ONe sIBlinG tHEn Two YEars lATer Go oUT wITh tHe oTHer????”

“shUT UUUP”

Sarah knows the whole Bee Movie

She also has a shirt of the script

Doesn’t actually like musicals

“They just aren’t for me”

Prefers movies

True Neutral™

don’t get me wrong though

she worships Rent

“I thought you didn’t like musicals”

“leave me alone, Mimi’s coming”

allergic to animal fur actually

so she went all kim possible

“I have a hairless mole-rat”

“WHAT THE FUCK”

“Be nice to Rufus”

Chowder is her childhood

so is kim possible tbh

Smalls 

She’s Medda’s only daughter

Everyone will fight for this kid

She’s actually younger than everyone else

She’s tough for an eighth grader

“YOU WANNA GO”

“Smalls calm tf down”

Favorite color is mint green

“It’s just so pleasing to the eye”

“So are boys”

“Race i didn’t ask for your commentary”

She wants to be in band but like,,, she only wants to play drums

Not the other percussion instruments

“Who wants to play those other lame instruments when there’s the drums?”

“Actually-”

“I DONT CARE DAVEY”

She listens very well actually

Also she remembers too many small details

“No one knows my middle name”

“It’s Aaron, what you talking about????”

She’s smart mouthed Delanceys’ a lot

They don’t do shit cause 1. That’s a kid and 2. That’s a girl

Their parents taught them better

Her favorite movie is shrek

“soMEBODY-”

“Smalls, please, it’s four. I need sl e ep”

Chaotic Neutral™

She’s attacked someone with a broom before

It was Jack

He jump scared her while she was sweeping the kitchen

Spot couldn’t breathe while medda and crutchie laughed along and checked if he was okay

Smalls laugh is a snort

“Who sounds like a pig?”

“Don’t call my sister a pig tf dude”

She’s not allowed to be around coffee

It doesn’t do anything really

She’ll throw the cup with the coffee still in to attack people if she’s angry enough though

I said she was chaotic neutral but i’m making her ass sound evil

She shares a room with crutchie

They have bunk beds

She’s top bunk

She hates that bunk but she understands why he’s bottom

She’s actually the youngest Medda ever adopted

When she adopted jack he was 15

Crutchie: 13

Spot: 16

Smalls: 10

She’s 13 now

She goes to her family for different things

Stories: Medda

Nightmare: Jack

Can’t sleep: Spot

Just wants cuddles: Crutchie

Theres different reasons behind these

For Medda she tells her stories about her exprience in theatre and Smalls finds them really nice since Medda’s voice is really soothing and she ususally falls asleep listening to her voice

When she was freaked out over a horror movie he wrapped his arms around her and hugged her close and well she found it really nice, eventually falling asleep since it was warm there and she was freezing and she relaxed a lot too

When she first moved in she couldn’t sleep that night and went downstairs to get water and then Spot came down cause he couldn’t sleep either (it was 3 am) and he helped her reach a glass and he just let her crash with him for the night (she fell asleep quick)

When Smalls felt sick one night she went down and cuddled with Crutchie since she couldn’t sleep and she ended up falling asleep quickly like that

When her brothers friends spend the night she always tries to avoid the mess

But fails

One of her brothers will always drag her in

OKAY BUT WHEN HER BROTHERS GO OFF TO COLLEGE SHE IS SO HAPPY FOR THEM

When she goes off to college she goes to NYU for nursing

she’s confused too

“Okay so... guys are cute but like wow girls are too”

“We finally have someone attracted to girls”

“Mama’s a lesbian what are you talking about?”