#fuckin. what is it. summer love? yeah thats the one

[askaniritual]

ok here's my nobody asked spot of fy top 10 2024 list plus directors commentary

Be Nice to Me - The Front Bottoms

yeah yeah most of my top songs r from my iconic playlist tfb songs about shatterstar organized by how unwell i think you have to be to agree thats because my third eye is open and i am receiving messages directly from the heavens or something. i got to see this song performed live this year and it really hit let me tell you

Red Wine Supernova - Chappell Roan

im well aware this is a deeply basic pick but i really do think this song is the song of the summer fr. its just a perfect pop song idk what to tell you

Lipstick Covered Magnet - The Front Bottoms

im gonna get on my knees/could you kick me in the face please/it'll make whatever i say sound like poetry

a shatterstar song. obviously. but also a vash song.

Ginger - The Front Bottoms

i moved on my own this year and literally the only way i got through it was by thinking abt ginger, sleeping on the floor of a hardwood floor apartment

Tattooed Tears - The Front Bottoms

the part of this that makes it a shatterstar song is the part that goes

i'm gonna have to learn that this love will never be convenient/it's not like a movie when we kiss/there'll never be no music when we kiss

Your favorite sidekick - underscores, 8485

great fuckin song man. soooooo fun for like jumping around your apartment alone in your underwear type of thing.

Godlight - Noah Kahan

i'd never heard this song before but he played it when i saw him live earlier this year, and he said it was one of his favorite songs but that he was embarrassed that it never really took off. thats crazy to me because this song rules. to know me is to hate me is to hate what i've become. crazy fuckin line!!!! anyway sorry for liking noah kahan it is my vice

HOT TO GO! - Chappell Roan

im ngl i used to really like this song but at this point i am kind of sick of it. it's fun but red wine supernova is the far superior song imo

leaf pile - The Front Bottoms

hot take but in sickness & in flames might be my favorite full length tfb album. rose is my favorite EP tho.

Hollywood Baby - 100 gecs

probably their best song that's not bloodstains? this or sympathy 4 the grinch.

Bonus round #11

Locals (Girls like us) - underscores, gabby start

this is such a good fuckin song dude this should honestly be higher i love everything abt this song i think the production is fun the lyrics are fun it all just really works.

[lovesongbracket]

Reminder: Vote based on the song, not the artist or specific recording! The tracks referenced are the original artist, aside from a few rare cases where a cover is the most widely known.

Lyrics, videos, info, and notable covers under the cut. (Spotify playlist available in pinned post)

THATS WHAT I WANT

Written By: KBeaZy, Blake Slatkin, Omer Fedi, Ryan Tedder & Lil Nas X

Artist: Lil Nas X

Released: 2021

On “THATS WHAT I WANT,” Lil Nas sings about his desire for love, which is often a struggle to find as a gay black man. “THATS WHAT I WANT” debuted at #5 on the Rolling Stone’s Top 100 Songs Chart during the week ending September 23rd, 2021. During the week ending October 2, the song debuted at #10 on Billboard’s Hot 100 chart. During the week ending February 26, 2022, the song peaked at #9. On July 26, 2022, “THATS WHAT I WANT” was certified 2× platinum by the RIAA.

[Intro] One, two, three, four [Verse 1] Need a boy who can cuddle with me all night Keep me warm, love me long, be my sunlight Tell me lies, we can argue, we can fight Yeah, we did it before, but we'll do it tonight An afro, black boy with the gold teeth With dark skin, lookin' at me like he know me I wonder if he got the G or the B Let me find out and see, comin' over to me, yeah [Pre-Chorus] These days, I'm way too lonely I'm missing out, I know These days, I'm way too alone And I'm known for givin' love away, but [Chorus] I want someone to love mе I need someone who needs me 'Causе it don't feel right when it's late at night And it's just me in my dreams So I want someone to love That's what I fuckin' want [Verse 2] Look, you know it's harder to find in these times But I got nothin' but love on my mind (My mind) I need a baby with love in my prime Need an adversary to my "down and marry" Like, tell me "That's life" when I'm stressin' at night Be like, "You'll be okay" and, "Everything is alright," uh Let me in that thing, 'cause I'm not wanting anything But your loving, your body, and a little bit of your brain [Pre-Chorus] These days, I'm way too lonely I'm missing out, I know These days, I'm way too alone And I'm known for givin' love away, but [Chorus] I want someone to love me I need someone who needs me 'Cause it don't feel right when it's late at night And it's just me in my dreams So I want someone to love That's what I fuckin' want [Bridge] I want someone to love me I need someone who needs me [Chorus] 'Cause it don't feel right when it's late at night And it's just me in my dreams So I want someone to love That's what I fuckin' want

Dancing in the Dark

Written By: Bruce Springsteen

Artist: Bruce Springsteen

Released: 1984

The first single off of Springsteen’s seminal album Born In The U.S.A., this track was written two years after most of the other songs on the album. Producer Jon Landau thought the new album lacked a guaranteed hit and pushed Springsteen to draft one more song. The two men got into a brief altercation, after which Bruce wrote “Dancing in the Dark” about his ‘difficulty writing a hit single and his frustration trying to write songs that will please people’. Its music video contains an early appearance by actress Courtney Cox. It also helped introduce Springsteen to a younger audience, setting the stage for a seven-single run of top 10 hits from the album. “Dancing In The Dark” became Springsteen’s highest charting single the Boss has ever had, spending four weeks in the #2 position of the Billboard Hot 100 in the summer of 1984, held from the top spot by Duran Duran “The Reflex” and Prince “When Doves Cry”. It also spent six weeks at #1 on the Mainstream Rock chart. This single is also Springsteen’s only to be certified platinum.

[Verse 1] I get up in the evening And I ain't got nothing to say I come home in the morning I go to bed feeling the same way I ain't nothing but tired Man, I'm just tired and bored with myself Hey there, baby I could use just a little help [Chorus] You can't start a fire You can't start a fire without a spark This gun's for hire Even if we're just dancing in the dark [Verse 2] Messages keep getting clearer Radio's on, and I'm moving 'round my place I check my look in the mirror I wanna change my clothes, my hair, my face Man, I ain't getting nowhere I'm just living in a dump like this There's something happening somewhere Baby, I just know that there is [Chorus] You can't start a fire You can't start a fire without a spark This gun's for hire Even if we're just dancing in the dark [Bridge] You sit around getting older There's a joke here somewhere, and it's on me I'll shake this world off my shoulders Come on, baby, the laugh's on me [Verse 3] Stay on the streets of this town And they'll be carving you up all right They say, "You gotta stay hungry" Hey, baby, I'm just about starving tonight I'm dying for some action I'm sick of sitting around here trying to write this book I need a love reaction Come on now, baby, give me just one look [Chorus] You can't start a fire Sitting 'round crying over a broken heart This gun's for hire Even if we're just dancing in the dark You can't start a fire Worrying about your little world falling apart This gun's for hire Even if we're just dancing in the dark [Outro] Even if we're just dancing in the dark Even if we're just dancing in the dark Even if we're just dancing in the dark Hey, baby [Outro Saxophone Solo]

[adhets]

I've been thinking about this the whole week especially during nights after scrolling through social media for the updates of The Eras Tour Singapore. I think I'm just gonna write it down in here.

As much as I'm happy and content seeing so many happy faces and beautiful posts (from swifties or general people) about Taylor, about how amazing she is for putting together such a massive magical incredible show just for her fans, there is this feeling of hopeless, disappointed, sad, longing and hurt for not being in one of her show. Will not being in one for sure.

I've been a fan since You Belong With Me but just never had a chance to see her live because I live in Indonesia and Taylor certainly didn't come here often for tour. The announcement of Eras tour bring so much hope for me to finally see her. After waiting for further announcement I found that the only stop for Southeast Asia was in Singapore. I was like "at least it's not far enough. I think I can manage that". and the waiting and the war has begun. Just sitting restless waiting for the code really felt like real war and getting more hopeless as the time passed. And finally the code just never come to the mail. I've tried so many opportunities from third-parties seller but still not much of a luck. I'm a soldier down on the icy ground.

I was trying so hard to not feel bitter towards people (some social media influencers) who actually not a fan got a better luck and got the tickets 🤣 it's proved later on when they stay quite after cruel summer 🤣 okay I'm not going to be bitter right now. it's just their luck.

All this long posts just for saying what I've been praying for.

Dear Taylor @taylorswift , you mean the whole world to me. You've been inspiring me to just go for what I want. You showed me that it is okay to be afraid and jump anyway. To just say what I want not holding back. To handle all obstacles in life like a brave soldier. You taught me to take the fuckin lemon or whatever this life has given you, make lemonade, and sell it ! Sell it to 96.000 people worth of a stadium and even more ! I may not have a chance to see you on tour this era but I really really hope I will one day. I hope when that time come I'm getting to see you more than just one day (getting greedy as I begin to imagine how incredible it must be 🤣)

Anyway I just wish and hope you're safe and healthy whenever you are. (In case it's getting weird, In Indonesia when someone pray for your health it doesn't necessarily mean you're not in good condition it just means they care about you so much) Please live long and loooong enough so We can finally meet. Even if we don't meet in person, I will be more than thrilled to just meet you where You're on stage doing things that you love and I'm on the crowd and you wouldn't probably recognize me.

so just pleaaaaseeee live long enough and bring that magical tour of yours to Indonesia or wherever that close to this damn country 🤣

You followed me so i think you might read it somehow or probably you don't . doesn't matter. I finally get it out of my mind. and yeah thats that. i love you so much 🫶🏻

[technicolorlove]

(conclusion) "What you want seems to be Life is Strange but RWBY. And that's not insulting LiS cause I absolutely LOVE that series and the topics it goes into, but I also acknowledge that there's a definite difference in type where one fits with the things you're wanting vs. the other that doesn't." This is what I am doing. I am not misunderstanding what RWBY is, I am lamenting the fact that it something else. I wish it was this character driven story about desperation and expectations and injustice and what we as people can do to overcome those things. about how people handle facing the inevitable end of the world. but it just.. isnt that. that is what ive been getting at. Its so close the potential is THERE i can SEE it. thats why i made this post to begin with!! there was potential to do something really interesting with adam's character that just wasnt done. He has a substantial impact on the trajectory of two of our lead characters lives but ultimately hes a fucking stepping stone so that.. what? salem, in all her grim puddle worth of character can be the Big Bad^TM? thats not interesting, our girls have zero connection to her other than yang and ruby via summer? weiss sure as shit has no relevant ties to her and unless she's responsible for faunus discrimination being started (which hoooooly shit what a fucking twist THAT would be) blake really has no ties to her either! ruby and jaune's beef is with cinder, yang's was kinda neo.. neo's was ruby!! nobody except ozpin has any ties to her!! other than the big one "shes going to end the world" wow, what a thrilling plot device. fucking ronan the accuser(gotg1) level of connection. the guardians dont fucking care about him hes just an obstacle on their journey to becoming friends! which is why i DESPISE salem. its like saying ATLA is about stopping firelord ozai. Sure you're right technically but like no the fuck it isnt. I think you're right though, rwby is ultimately a fucking mcguffin hunt and vaguely developed blob of teenagers fighting Evil Woman and im just wishing it wasnt. The current place rwby is in is incompatible with what i wish it was. it would require time travel for them to be (hehe, LiS callback) I think the show is fun but i think ultimately it's a lost cause, v9 was a good sendoff, i hope if v10 does get made its handled well but with the return to the cast of... 15 fuckin "main" characters i doubt it. I wish salem had stayed some looming threat for a lot longer, i wish i wish i wish. but it just isnt real. Ultimately i've realized that our disagreement was the premise. you assume i think the show.. i dunno what you think im arguing for here actually. I think im arguing that what this show is could have been handled so much better than it was. i dont think that simply adding what im talking about to the show would "fix" anything individually. RWBY's biggest missed potential is so ingrained into the show that anything short of a full reboot wouldnt help it. So yeah, i suppose i do want something else "but rwby", though i think its ATLA not LiS. We can talk in circles but like, there's no point, the racism is still gonna be handled poorly at the end of the day. All we can do is appreciate/critique what we got, lament what we didn't, and keep moving forward. whew.. this was fun! Thanks for helping me work out my like, repressed thoughts on why I like rwby so much despite all the problems I have with it.

I wouldn't consider the crazy stalker ex angle a bad one for Adam (some people may disagree with me on this), but what I do wish had happened was building up to it more. And it sorta happened in this volume, where his oversight and cowardice at Haven resulted in him losing power. I just wish we had seen more of that fall yknow? How his desire for adoration and "justice" was fueled by his own ego. And the more power he lost the more the manipulative stalker ex boyfriend thing became prevalent. I also wish that his SDC brand went literally anywhere story wise. The fact that it's never brought up again (especially to WEISS) just sorta puts a big question mark on the end of his character. The fact that we don't even have a canon explanation for how he got it is even worse!! I have a lot of issues with how faunus are are used as a massive bludgeon with the word "RACISM" printed on it despite the writers' seeming unwillingness to actually discuss that topic. It takes Weiss all of two episodes to unlearn her prejudice but then she never uses any of her seemingly substantial power to actually DO anything about her father's business practices or for even make a switch to buying dust from local shops instead of straight from SDC itself. Imagine how much deeper Flint's jab at her would have been if we saw her actually trying to put in effort to undo the harm her family does to small businesses!!

I dunno I feel like they should have picked an angle for Adam and stuck with it. (Also i'm someone who likes Ironwood's fall and thinks it was well built up, so sue me)

[tohokuu]

jeon yunho - the mixed waters of love and hate 

if you can read, you can reblog too. 

warnings : enemies to fuckerz. semi-public sex. pussy eating, wall sex, praise kink, degredation kink, yunho likes his hair pulled, big dick yunho, they hate each other, undeniable lust lol.

a/n : feeding you. 

wc : 1.8k

“you are such a fucking bitch, you know that” yunho yelled. “oh yeah ? well i’m not the one who dragged a lawnmower through my neighbors fucking garden.” it was a stupid argument, or actually it was mostly a malfunction. (you wanted to blame it on the lawnmower.) you and your terrible, and excruciatingly hot neighbor were arguing on miss kims lawn, but somehow her lawnmower malfunctioned and just went off. 

the both of you had no idea how it happened. it wasn’t even your fault, you two just happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time. the lawnmower cut through the entire garden of colorful flowers miss kim had spent her summer on. you almost felt bad. 

almost. miss kim had came and harangued you both for what seemed like hours. you were forced to tend to her garden to repay her for the mess you two had not made. “but miss kim it was your lawn-” “don’t fucking patronize me, jeon !” she snapped. yunho ducked the slipper that was thrown at him, that then... directly hit you. 

“fucking bitch-” you snapped at yunho, before you and yunho could start again, miss kim handed you both her box of gardening tools. “discuss your wedding plans later. fix these and make them look like before they got chopped at the stems.” she snapped. 

and that is how you and yunho were forced to work together for the rest of the summer to fix your neighbors garden. “i fucking hate it here.” he groaned. you clapped back just as quick, “well it isn’t any better thanks to you.” yunho sent you a look of anger, one that had the vein in his neck popping out and his face red. 

“you irritating fucking bitch. this is all because of you. you’re the fucking reason we’re stuck here.” your eye twitched at his use of words. “well you know fuckin wha-” you were interrupted by miss kim’s son stepping outside. “you know.. you guys don’t have to fight all the time..” he sighed. “hey, joong.” you cheered

it was as if you were bipolar or something. your mood changed the second the other boy stepped outside. he was sunshine in its purest form and he radiated light everywhere he went, unlike yunho who left a trail of cigarettes at each street corner. “hello, y/n. my sweetheart, how have you been ?” he asked with a smile. you blushed, clearly taken aback by how sweet he was being. 

you felt someone staring holes into the back of your head and although, you knew exactly who it was, you continued to flirt with hongjoong. “aw, i’ve been good, joong. how are you ? how’s the bakery going ?” he giggled a bit, placing a dainty hand over his mouth. “quite good, actually. i’ve got these two boys working for me..” 

you felt bad that you were no longer paying attention to hongjoongs story, instead you were focusing on the man behind you. the taller male who had removed his shirt shamelessly and was digging dirt with a shovel. you couldn’t help but think of the sweat that ran down his body, trailing over his abs and dipping below his waistband. you couldn’t complain about the view you were receiving. “alright well, i’ll see you later. yeah ?” hongjoong said, softly. 

you turned your attention back to him. “ye- yeah of course. i”ll see you later.” it was when hongjoong had walked a safe distance away that you heard yunho mock your voice. “ye-yeah i-i’ll s-see you l-later joongie... fuckin whore.” he mumbled. whore ?... a whore ? well, this one was new. pure anger coursed throughout your veins and before you could think, you tossed a fist full of dirt into his hair. 

“you fuckin cunt !” he screamed. you stepped back with a menacing stare. “thats what you fuckin ge-” before you could even look at him, yunho was staring down at you and advancing towards you quickly. you backed up on instinct until your back hit the fence. “get what ? hm ? you’re mad i called you a whore ? don’t lie, y/n. i bet you liked it.” you didn’t say anything. what would you even say ? that you didn’t like it ? that would be a lie. 

“oh now you’re quiet. come on, say something.” he barked. “get out of my face, yunho.” you said quietly. he didn’t budge, instead he got even closer. you could feel his sweaty, shirtless body pressed against yours. his tanned, sweaty skin was getting distracting and you couldn’t help but stare. “like what you see, princess ? take a picture. it’ll last longer.” 

you cringed. “what the fuck, dude ?” yunho smiled, lifting your chin up to stare at him with the abnormally large scissors in his hands. the cool blade was a huge contrast against the searing heat of the sun. your clothes stuck to your body and yunho had noticed. he had noticed so fucking hard.. 

“it makes me mad when you look at him like that.” he whispered. he was so close. his breath could be felt on your lips and the bulge in his cargo pants was getting more apparent. “what ? you fuckin jealous or something ?” you whispered back. “that’s exactly what i am.” he growled. “why do you care so much ?” you asked. you stared into his eyes, they were full of aggression and anger, but there was a small trace of something you couldn’t recognize. “because i’m in fucking love with you.” he said. 

yunho slammed his lips on you. they weren’t kind to your own but you kissed back. you wanted this just as much as he did. “you’re fucking mine. got that ?” he growled. his heavy arms were reaching around you to bring you closer. the heat of the sun was nothing compared to the heat you felt now. “if i’m yours, you gotta claim me first.” 

yunho smirked against your lips, “oh yeah ? then lemme just show you how much you’re mine.” he got down on his knees, not caring that if anyone turned the corner, they’d see yunho with his face between your thighs. he pulled your shorts and underwear down at once. none of his movements were kind, they were all desperate actions of lust. he dove straight into your cunt, licking up a stripe with his tongue. 

“so fucking good,” he groaned. the vibrations of his voice made you clench around nothing. hsi tongue dove straight inside you while his nose grazed your clit repeatedly. “if i knew you tasted this good, i would’ve done this a long time ago.” he moaned. he licked up everything you had to offer and if it wasn’t for his tight grip on your thighs, you would have fallen face first into the ground. his tongue was messy but it gave you so much pleasure and you couldn’t find it in you to complain. one particular thrust of his tongue sent you shaking. “fu-fuck, yunho-” he paused immediately. he pulled away with an angry look on his face. 

“shut up and stay still.” his angry face and commanding tone cut through you. you didn’t have a comeback for him while his face was between your thighs. he had control over your body and you didn’t mind. you needed something to ground you and that’s how your lithe fingers found their way coursing through his soft black hair. 

you tugged and he moaned into your cunt. “fuck.. do that again.” you smirked to yourself, not wanting to give in so easy. “say please” you whined. instead of receiving the response you wanted, yunho pulled away from fucking you with his tongue. his lips dragged to your clit and sucked harshly. “nghh- fuck fuck fuck, yunho please !” your back arched and your hands automatically pulled yunho’s hair even harder. he groaned into your pussy, “so fucking good..” 

your orgasm reached you quickly as he continued to suck on your clit. you squirted all your juiced against the bottom half of his face and he drank it up greedily. he licked you clean and it wasn’t until you were jerking in his hands from overstimulation that he let you go. he stood back up on his feet, towering over you. “gonna fuck you raw, sweetheart. you want that ?” he asked. you nodded with tears streaming down your face. the pleasure of being with him, someone like him, was a slap in the face. 

you swore your life up and down that you’d never do something like this with someone that you hated. but you couldn’t deny it when he was so unbelievably shameless each morning you stepped outside to grab the mail. he’d be watering his own lawn, shirtless with a pair of loose sweatpants and each time you would make eye contact. 

your train of thought was broken when you felt yunho’s large member breaching your cunt at once. he didn’t give you time to adjust. instead, your legs were wrapped around his waist and he was pressing you against the wall harder. you couldn’t do much but take his cock inside you. the stretch burned and you begged him to slow down. “please, yunho.. i can’t take it.” you whined 

he bit your collarbone, “nah, i think you’re gonna take what i give you.” he reprimanded. as yunho fucked into you, his tip hit your g-spot each time. he pulled you closer, kissing each part of your face and shoulders with every thrust. it almost felt like love. but the bitter reminders of the hate you two shared for each other was still present. 

the way you purposely dug your nails into his back harder than you needed to, the harsh bites he left along your body and the thrusts that seemingly had no rhythm. “i fucking hate you.” you moaned while pressing his lips against yours. you fisted the hair at his nape as he groaned back in your mouth and whispered a heated response of his own. “the feeling is fucking mutual.” 

your cunt clenched around him harder and harder as he kept thrusting. getting impatient, you leaned a hand down to rub your clit, oh and was that a big mistake. yunho grabbed both your hands and pinned them above your head. “you cum from my cock, or not at all.” he said before thrusting back into you at a pace that was unforgiving. 

you couldn’t keep your moans in any longer and you were sure that the whole neighborhood had heard you at this point. “dirty fuckin’ girl. taking my cock like a champ, huh ?” he crooned. his praise was the final step towards the crashing orgasm impending on you. your stomach did flips as you gushed around him once more, wetting his thighs in the process. 

he spilled inside you at the same time. thrusting into you harder to ride out his own orgasm. “fuck, yunho..” you moaned. “yeah that’s what i just did.” he quipped, and suddenly the tense energy between you two returned. “i am never fucking you again.” you snapped. 

“you sure ? because i wonder who’s cum is staining my thighs right now ?” 

tagging : @12–8 @strangertides @getoswhore @deliciouslydisturbed365 @shiningstar-byulxx @perfectlysane24 @chittaphonstar @daisyxxmist @leicy0756 @rdiamondbts2727 @earth-to-leiki @in-san-ity @aesmstar @woosk1tten @itsbritnybitch @eggyeok @malewife-supremacy @luvaffaire @sxlver-sweet @ateezbabysitters @swimmingkpopblog + send an ask to be removed or added to the tag list. strictly asks.

[greyeyedmonster-18]

spaces pt. 1

who's gonna be the first one to say goodbye?

(wolfstar, navigating spaces with each and space...from each other; end of hogwarts->first war)

(what started out as a sweet-love dribble ((the last section of this which has been out for a bit)) morphed into a first war angst saga, whatever.)

--

December 1977

Sirius had forgotten what it was like to have things of his own, the way he had grown so accustomed to sharing. His notes with his classmates, his free time spread out between helping professors after class and sending a letter to the new tapestry of family he was weaving together; his leather jacket with anyone who was cold; his summers, his bedroom, his best ear with James; kisses with Remus whenever possible. Everything...everything with Remus whenever possible. Sirius would share his soul if Remus asked for it, he was certain, though he knew Remus never would and perhaps that was the only reason why he acquiesced to the unspoken request. Sirius's hands he shared with Remus, his bed (though James was there too on occasion, and Sirius didn't flinch at having to make space for four arms and four legs, all tangled together Sirius in the middle; no place he would rather be), his midnight concerns and his morning coffee. Sirius didn't have many things of his own anymore, but after being disowned, things weren't nearly as important, especially those left behind. Rather, Sirius only cared for the people who stayed.

Those he didn't have to share.

And what an incomparable trade-off. So Sirius thought, never thinking twice about the sharing of things or the paying for things, because money was a thing he could share too, but the things were precisely what caused their first fight.

A stupid coat.

"I didn't ask you to get me one!"

"It's a gift!" Sirius said back, unsure of how a romantic gesture--a early holiday present--had been taken the wrong way.

"I didn't ask you to throw your money at me either!"

"You're being fucking ridiculous, Remus, it's a coat, you needed one and I--"

"Bought me one! Exactly. Merlin, Sirius, you can't just keep doing this--"

"At this particular issue, yes, I can! I can just throw my piles of money at you because I'm your boyfriend and I wanted to, and you can throw your tantrum about it but I didn't do anything wrong!"

"I have a coat!"

"You always take mine!"

"Oh, I didnt know that was such a fucking problem--" Remus said, going to his bed where the new coat was as well as Sirius's other jacket, Remus throwing them in his direction.

"Thats not--"

"Don't worry, Sirius I won't use yours anymore, you can have it back--"

"You're being so fucking stupid, Remus. It's a g--"

"And now I'm stupid?"

"At this moment yeah, honestly," Sirius told him, "Fuckin chip on your shoulder. Is it so hard to say thank you?"

"You're an arse."

"Ah yes, how terrible I am for thinking of you and buying you a practical gift. Such an arse. Piss off, Remus." Sirius rolled his eyes and grabbed his leather jacket, tapping the pockets briefly before storming out of the dormitory, intent on going to smoke. He opened the door as rough as he could, for the first time in his life wanting to slam it despite how much he hated when other people did it, but stopped himself, settling for the sound the handle made when it hit the wall and stomping his boots down the stairs. He sounded like his father as he walked out of the dormitory and he hated himself for it.

It was a gift! You should be grateful!

Stomp, stomp, stomp.

It was practical and something you needed! Gifts are not meant to be frivolous.

Stomp, stomp, stomp.

You're given a gift and you say 'thank you'--that is manners.

Stomp, stomp, stomp, to the ledge outside the castle, cigarette already in his mouth. He slipped his thumb along the muggle lighter, and inhaled.

He didn't ask for a coat, you know.

He didn't ask for any gifts, in fact, he told you it made him nervous to exchange gifts in the first place and you didn't listen.

And then you called him stupid!

"He started it..." mumbled Sirius around his cigarette into the night, realizing as he said the words out loud how childish he was being. Maybe.

He still thought Remus needed a coat, and he wanted to buy him one.

"Apparently, that's a fucking crime..." Sirius said out loud and titled his head back exhaling smoke into the air, just as footsteps were heard behind him. "Piss. Off. Remus." Sirius heard himself saying without having to turn to look.

He would recognize the scuff of Remus's loafers anywhere, his boyfriend incapable of picking his feet up. At eleven, it had driven Sirius up a fucking wall. At seventeen, it made Sirius smile when he heard the sound shuffling into the common room at the end of the day. Now, at this moment, it was grating. Sirius wanted to rip the loafers off Remus's feet and chuck them into the night.

Fetch, you fucking arse.

"No." Remus's voice cracked, and Sirius raised an eyebrow to look at him. Standing with his hands in the pockets of his worn brown coat and staring back at Sirius.

"Fine, then I will. I'll go bugger off to the ledge, and you can stand here freezing all fucking night because your coat is no better than a pillow sham."

"Nice, Sirius," he rolled his eyes and Sirius flipped him the bird, stalking away, to the ledge as he promised, Remus following.

"Leave it alone, Remus!"

"It or you?"

"Both, hm?"

"No," Remus shook his head again. "If we're going to fight, we're going to fight. We're going to have it out, and you don't just get to leave and be alone and then come back hours later and tell me it's fine, when it's not, and then we both pretend, and then it blows up months from now."

"Fuck off."

"You can be mad at me, I'm angry with you, and then we'll be...angry at each other but I'm not spending the next five years of my life watching you leave when we have a fight," Remus said, folding his arms over his chest awkwardly. "So you can...give me mean looks on the ledge and I'll..." he looked around for a moment before sitting on the opposite end from Sirius, "sit here and scowl and...then...we''ll fight."

"Why?" Sirius found himself asking. A fight was something to avoid at all costs. In Sirius's experiences, fights ended in disaster. In burning tapestries and wine glasses shattered at the kitchen table, and running away to your best friend's house in the dead of night. They ended in detentions and lectures and violence. He didn't want that anywhere near Remus when he could just...leave.

"Because it's...because," Remus gestured aimlessly.

"Brilliant." Sirius scoffed and sat down on the ledge, drawing his knee up protectively to his chest. A barrier. Remus did the same after muttering something under his breath and letting out a vehement exhale way he did whenever Sirius frustrated him. Sirius knew that sound too.

Just stop and think for one damn second, Sirius.

And they smoked in silence. On opposite ends of the ledge, when they were usually on top of one another. Inhaling exhales and sharing a cigarette for two. Smiling into kisses, hands fisting into hair. No space to be found.

"We fight because even though we're mad, we love each other," Remus broke the silence finally. "Don't we?"

Sirius stayed silent. Not wanting to admit it first. Not wanting to say that he loved Remus more than most things, most people in the world. Not wanting to just cave and apologize to make things right again because he was so desperate for Remus's love. Silence was the easier option.

"And uhm...I'll say something like, hey sirius, i may have over reacted a tiny bit about a coat and it was thoughtful of you, i am just pants at accepting gifts and it wasn't fair for me to get upset with you so quickly and act like a stubborn arsehole."

Sirius picked at the hem of his jeans, still not looking at Remus.

"And...you could say something like, hey remus, i'm sorry for calling you stupid and for talking over you. And...we'd keep talking. Because you're still my favorite person to talk to, even if I'm not yours."

"Don't do that."

"Do what?"

"Pretend like I don't give a shit about you."

"Then say something. I didn't know me taking your coat was such a problem that you had to buy me my own."

"It's not."

"Sirius."

"I'm trying here, Remus," Sirius looked up finally, "I'm still here, I haven't left, I'm here. Alright?"

Remus got up from the opposite end, and moved closer.

"Can I hold your hand?" he asked, but Sirius was already reaching for his, tired of the space.

"I can't....talk about it right this moment...because I'm trying really hard to not just be angry with you and say mean things..."

"You're good at that."

"Black Family trait."

"Trade-off for the cheekbones..." Remus said, pulling Sirius's hand into his chest and putting his other on the back of Sirius's neck. "We....will talk about it?"

"In a bit."

"We can't do that if you get up and leave."

"I'm not."

--

September 1978

Remus really thought Sirius was playing some sort cruel joke on him the longer they looked at flats around London searching for a place to call theirs. They had set up temporary residence alongside James and Lily in Sirius’s Uncles old property–a cottage on the seaside– and to be honest, Remus didn’t know why they couldn’t stay there until the end of time.

The sun and salt air, enough space for the four of them, certainly enough for Remus and Sirius alone, with the added benefit of being free. And Remus was very much still unemployed without family galleons to fall back on like James and Sirius. But Sirius wanted something else for an unspoken reason Remus couldn’t put his finger on no matter how many times he asked wouldn’t it be nice if we stayed here? into the side of Sirius’s face between bedsheets. And so they went hunting in London, Remus looking at the paper for muggle flats in neighborhoods that were within a reasonable budget, every vacancy sign checked out.

Admittedly, it wasn’t a terrible afternoon. Not that any day was terrible when Sirius was around, even on the days where Remus’s temper was short and Sirius forgot all communication skills, but Remus had expected flat hunting to be an arduous experience. It wasn’t.

It was…just long, and got stranger by the second, Sirius dismissing flats for the oddest sort of reasons like the height of the windows or the color of the brick and saying things like i mean, it’s a good option, but we can think on it a bit longer.. it doesn’t feel right.

It was the last one on the list, the two of them letting themselves into the flat with a key from the building manager.

Remus crinkled his nose at the sight.

Tiny.

Narrow halls.

Remus was certain if someone went to the lav, the entire flat would be able to hear and smell everything that occurred in there.

The kitchen barely had counter space. The sitting room might’ve had room for a single couch. The bedroom? There was no chance of getting Sirius’s Uncles comfortable king-size bed in there. Unless of course, it was nothing but the bed.

No space.

White chipped walls. The flat certainly needed some tender love and care…and perhaps a fresh coat of paint, and…probably fumigation. But there in the bedroom, Sirius grabbed his hand, tightly, and Remus was temporarily stunned by the wide smile on Sirius’s face. The one that was the color yellow personified, brighter than the god-damn sun, the one meant just for Remus.

“It’s perfect.”

“This?”

“Yeah. Our bed can go right there,” Sirius pointed to the far wall, “And…we can hang up some of your records, you know the ones that you can’t listen to anymore? Just put them up on the walls and…” Sirius looked at Remus, grey eyes shining with possibility and opportunity that Remus certainly didn’t see in this box of a flat, “What do you think?”

“It’s…small.”

“Yeah.”

“Yeah? Just…yeah? Nothing else?”

Sirius nodded again, pulling Remus closer to him, arms going around his waist. Remus caught his balance, a hand on Sirius’s chest, as he met Sirius’s eyes. “I don’t need anything more.”

“We can…get something bigger, baby, I promise–”

“I did the big house, Moons.” Sirius told him, “I did the big…fancy house with all the rooms and more space than should be allowed. I did that. We also had a castle together.”

Remus smiled softly. Walking through Sirius in the halls had made him feel like he owned it. They had the astronomy tower and under the stands at the Quidditch pitch; behind the greenhouses; a perfect stone ledge just outside the front of the castle doors where they smoked; the lake…they did have a castle together.

“I dId the big house without…the love. And I can tell you, it’s really not that great. But…I’ve never done the small thing with the love and I’m…thinking that could really be something. Have you?”

Remus laughed, “No.” He didn’t come from money like Sirius did. But Remus’s childhood home had been plenty big. The countryside of Wales his entire playground. “I…haven’t.”

“So I don’t need anything else. Do you?”

Fill the whole flat with love. Coming out of the cracks in the floorboards, leaking from the pipes, bursting through the windows like rays of sunshine and starlight depending on the time of day. Put it on the cool side of the pillow and tuck it into creaky closets so when they’re opened, love tumbles out alongside blankets. Love just…left on the floor. So much that guests will have to step around it, or else learn to embrace it. Just as they would a pretentious Persian rug or a tasteless vase.

Take off your shoes, walk softly, we lay our love at your feet.

“….Other than a big bed?”

“We’ll keep the bed.”

“Can’t think of a single thing then.”

to be continued

[vilejpg]

i was thinkin to myself, just now, just thinkin, man. i dont really like human warriors au. especially not those summer camp aus. but then i was like,,, waaaait a second

warrior cats au summer camp except the summer camp is a thin veil to hide the fact that everyone- and i do mean everyone - there are fuckin cultists. they have four clans; thunder, shadow, wind, river. they follow star clan. religiously. nobody goes to the summer camp unless they're in one of those clans,,,, or they want to be in them

rusty is a kid who wanted to go to summer camp for once in his life and his parents were like "yeah, sure" and then BAM little did they know they let their son be indoctrinated into a cult and now his name is no longer rusty, his name is now "fireheart" and he spends a summer away from them all and tries to explain things to his parents but theyre like "what the fuck??? you're not going back there again" so he runs away, leaving his friends and family behind for a cult thats it

cats are SUPED important, obvi. gotta have cats somewhere in this au.

parents are probably told that their kid is going to learn some Responsibility over the summer during camp by taking care of a baby animal the whole time, right?

but then the camp counselors turn around and tell the kids, “You see this? This kitten, right here?” (Because the baby animals are ONLY cats) “This is you. This would’ve been you, in another life. Cherish it.”

and the kids, who are dumb kids, are just, “wow kitty!!!” and then they keep getting told over and over that the kitten they’ve gotten is them in another life, so they just. kinda believe it.

ravenpaw is a kid who’s real name is probably smth like sheldon or benjamin, and he’s given a rly sickly kitten and given the whole ‘this is you in another life’ spiel, and listen, he loves that cat, but damn if that isn’t a blow to his self esteem. it’s just one more reason for tigerclaw, who is deffo a camp counselor who was once named timothy, to think he’s weak. tigerclaw has an obnoxiously buff and huge cat that was the runt of it’s litter.

[foxtriestobiteandmaimandkilland]

ok w/e ill just not count all the songs im meaning 2 remove ok. tagged by oscarrr @spaghett-onaplate​ tyyy oscarrrrrr. errr thingyyy shuffle all ur music list the first 10 (ignore the ones im gonna Kill) gonna addddd 1 extra layer 2 this bc why not and im gonna also add why this song is on my Big Song List (so like idk where i found it from or what i like abt it idfk) 1. out of my league by fitz and the tantrums - well this is just a classic yknow errr i dont remember the first time i heard this but i DO remember dancing in the rain 2 it w my friend which was cool. this song tastes like fanta and haribos bc thats what we also bought when we hung out. (october 2020)

2. oh yeah u gonna cry? by lovejoy - well i mean its lovejoy everyone loves lovejoy. errrr this one in specific is rllyyyy good im ngl i think its one of my favourites from pebblebrain bc its just got such a good feel to it like its smth u can dance 2 rlly easily. this song smells like clean laundry and springggg i think. (october 2021)

3. sweet hibiscus tea by penelope scott - well i do usually skip this song but i keep it bc its too good 2 remove. i only skip it bc i once listened to it on repeat soooo many times so it kinda got ruined 4 me. this song sounds like wind and leaves and a window opening. yeaaaaa. it feels rllyyy nostalgic which i like. (september 2020)

4. honeypie by jawnie - veryyyy vibey song. dont remember when i first heard it butttt yeah. its a VERY fun song like genuinely it IS a dance song. yeahh dunno theres not rlly a whole lot else to say about this. it feels likeeee summer sunshine and cold drinks (july 2021)

5. i miss having sex but atleast i dont wanna die anymore by waterparks - ok i know all these songs look like a very specific genre im now realising literally almost all of these were put on here likeee late 2020 early 2021 sooo spotifys just giving me not a lot of range here. anyways this is still a cool song. its very fun and like idk. theres not a whole lot 2 say abt it rlly yeah. it tastes like oranges and strawberries.  (october 2020)

6. mamma mia by austin weber (not the abba version sorryyy) - just like this one a lot likee its mamma mia what else can u say abt it. its fuckin mamma mia. looks like lights and pillows (march 2021)

7. hey me by tremantis - ok fun fact i dont like this song anymore NOT bc its bad but bc i listened 2 it a lot when i was rlly depressed lol. still a good song. fun to tap along 2 the drums. this oneeeeee sounds to minecraft blocks breaking (june 2021)

8. your heart is a muscle the size of your fist by ramshackle glory - ok i love this song sooo much and have for a while. just a fun song 2 sing along 2 yaknow. i would def recommend this song the most out of all the songs ive gotten so far. smells likeeee. petrol and pine wood (october 2020)

9. the devil wears a suit and tie by colter wall - idk not the mostttt fun 2 listen 2 a lot but definitely a cool song. remember clearly building a minecraft tower while listening 2 this 4 the first time. the chorus has a veryyy nice rhythm 2 it. tastes like burnt toast (august 2022)

10. twin size mattress by the front bottoms - idk again its just a good song. errrrr yeah idk smells like sweat and blood and maybe thats bc i can smell both those things rn gross. but yea. good song. would recommend. (september 2021)

ok this has rlly. exposed like 2021 me rlly a lot like almost all of these r from autumn or summer 2020 or 2021. actually yknow what ill add the date i added then next to them at the end. yea. literally only one is from 2022. oh COME ON literally the 11th song was added YESTERDAY. its pressure bomb 3?!?! by jhariah btwww. anyways ye enjoy my 2021 and 2020 tastes

Gonna do a tag game BUT means i have 2 sort out my music oopsiessss

[tacom-literatureu-blog]

reread Our Last Summer and took notes lmao

things i forgot about from Our Last Summer: -half changeling mumbo -dragon egg hatching (its called nevermore) -ranboo becoming a heretic -mumbo's homemade water resistance potion -grian's crying timer -technoblade making tubbo's cane -peanut butter & banana sandwich scene -on the dsmp its seconds on hermitcraft its ticks (does that change later?) -GRIANS SHORTER THAN TUBBO? -man remember when the chapters were supperrr lyric oriented? -michael's favourite song is american pie -pearl gaslighting ranboo like "no i didnt almost mention last life. what" -Sam is Doc's cousin. which does not get mentioned very often but is hilarious to think about. would that make sam tommy's… second cousin? who knows -ranboo does NOT have the redstone eating gene -why does doc have hello kitty band aids in his secret lab. actually no hes totally valid for that -authors note in chapter 19 talking about a hypothetical sequel with grian on the dsmp……. look where we are now -how much would the entire plot of this series change if ranboo had shown his locket with the family picture to scar. like genuinely -the very slow realisation from techno that michael is tubbo's son as well -i think its interesting how i, who is caught up in the latest book in the TACOMLU, can actually tell the difference in writing quality. its been 7 months of constant writing man, there's a LARGE improvement -doc: [long monologue about the intricacies of ranboos two types of blood ranboo: what about going home..? doc: oh yeah we can just go down to skyblock and take a portal to the dream smp lol -oh my god the fae/fairy lore that was referenced recently in knowing me knowing you was brought up partially in our last summer. the whole thing with the mass genocide or whatever. but i think it gets retroactively changed? or more like ranboo isnt aware of the empires so he doesnt know about katherine and her protection of fairies and whatever -"I'm so excited to write more and more in 2022" says patton, proceeding to write more a shit ton more in 2022 -god the renbob team up is the best thing ever. i miss renbob bring him back. he should be on the dsmp a few months from the current timeline in KMKY if all's the same -the curse words sewn onto tommy's l'manberg uniform -"l'manburg didnt exactly have a DMV, Blade" tubbo says just before taking techno and renbob on the worst automobile experience of their lives -tfw u find out that ur husband is on the hermitcraft server from a hermitcraft recap -the most unfair thing that ever happened was the watchers punishing GRIAN for the whole 'building a server portal' thing when he was the only one who was sorta against it when the idea was brought up. my man did NOT deserve everything he has gone through. like the whole server got moon'd which was a big thing that happened but i think grian had it worst -oh shit when ranboo ran away and scar was panicking like 'oh no im a horrible dad!' about him. thats the second time. scar this is the SECOND time -zedaph's having such a good time making a server portal <3 he wants to destroy the server and i am fully for it <3 -tango's soooooo mad about the profanity filter its hilarious -its been 7 months and i think we abandoned the platonic part of platonic husbands -michael charming everyone with his toddler powers -our last summer prototype portal bungee rope test tun went much better than KMKY's one -on that note. if we wanted to build a server portal in KMKY, why didnt they ask impulse for help? he helped on the original and it was much more recent for him. they were so stuck in their relationship drama that they forgot about their friends..

-i love the bit of dream jumping the gun. "Oh i get it now! you want to be admin! you want power!" techno: "bruh" -fuckin van not starting 😭 -reunion <3 -bring back scary grian. dream was genuinely afraid of him and he did the cool distorted text BEHAVE. how the mighty fall. hes a pathetic wet cat now 😔 -I FORGOT SCAR SAYS FUCK -what a role swap. scar saying fuck and grian harping on him for it vs grian saying fuck and scar harping on him for it -mama mia (here we go again) (i'll read it next)

in conclusion, Our Last Summer was awesome and i miss that timeline

BRO OMG okay okay. Before Our Last Summer, the most I had written was 12 pages of a shitty mafia mystery YA novel. I had never attempted something like this, but I really missed Ranboo.

I'm so proud of my progress, genuinely. And without getting comments, or Chambers help, I wouldn't be where I am today.

Our Last Summer was chaotic, and crazy, and sometimes didn't make sense. I retconned a lot of the early stuff, like shifter Mumbo, and I had NO idea about a Tommy and Scar plotline till Chambers started telling me about season 6.

When all is said and done, I'll go back, and rewrite OLS. I'll keep the dialogue and plot, but there are details I'd change.

I'm so proud of OLS and genuinely, I'm proud of me and Chambers. Thank you so much for reading, we always look forward to your comments. I hope you have a wonderful day! <3- Patton

[plinkcat-gif]

2 or 5 (or both) <3

2. What's your top 5 songs at the moment and why?

Tangled Up In Stars—Stealing Sheep

YK. i’m just Going Back a little bit i would listen to this all the time in like sixth grade i think. and also the first lyrics “you look so lizard-like it’s hot like you’re not, like it’s force-fed to you from the dark like a puppet on a string” so true bestie. so true.

Monsters of the North—The National Parks

NNNGGGGGGGGHHGNGNHHHG KAKASHI SONG KAKASHI SOGN !!!!! !!! it’s so just. fuckkuuuuckccckkkk

WE CAN BE WOLVES HOWLING AT THE MOON INDEED!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YEAH YOURE RIGHT WE CAN WE SHOULD!!!!!!!!!!! it’s just. the two singers. it’s a kakarin song but i’m a kkobrin shipper so i’m obligated to say it’s kkobrin. and i’m right 🔫

Two Sparrows—Tow’rs

GUITAR. I LOVE WHEN GUITAR. also a kkobrin song with verse 1 for kks, verse 2 for rin, verse three for obt. god i just think about this song all the fuckin time it lives in my head rent freeeeeee i’m insane ab it

Seventeen—Peach Pit

tbh. it’s got a good beat. deeper it’s a kkobrin song where kks is still (tragically) in high school but they’re taking a gap year for him DKSJDJJD idk it’s half an au it rots my brain it’s a little codependent girl summer idk idk idk i explode into jams every time i hear this song

literally anything by the oh hellos i coudlnt choose one i’m hooked on all their music literallyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

honorable mention: rome falls by panicland mostly because this song came COMPLETELY unbidden to me in a completely silent room and jumpscared me a little. i vividly thought “oh? ok i guess we’re doing this now” DKFJKSJSHF

5. Whats your relationship with your parents like?

HAHAHA I DIDNT EVEN KNOW THIS QUESTION WAS IN HERE THATS SO FUNNY THANK U SJDKDLAJSFLAJDK

my mom: super slay we’re actually besties and vent buddies and i tell her everything and she’s literally my closest friend rn and i love her dearly. soem strain regarding phone usage and online spaces because of some serious largely unaddressed trauma but so long as i keep convos away from that we are a-okay :333

my dad:

tiny vent and flashing gif under cut

complicated and nonexistent at the same time. short answer bc i’m not here to super-vent is that he has autism and alexithymia, or he drank for so long that he developed symptoms similar to it and he’s now trying to fix himself and his marriage and his relationships which is great but. um yk. it’s got issues.

thank u for asking even if i am trying not to overshare on that last one DKSHFKSJDKFJ <3333

[angelthebedsheet]

Ok but like imagine a 6’8 black girl walking into karasuno gym while the in practice.

a/n: oooh alr this gonna be a headcannon

lets get it!

okay so ms girl you have some backstory.... some LORE

you used to be apart of the third year gang before you had to transfer schools

the boys + kiyoko really missed you yk?

so today you finally came back to karasuno

esp asahi bc you were his home girl

you already knew your way around and saw some of your old classmates from year one

now baby you are a tall girl

like taller than asahi girl

ya legs were lookin real beautiful

now you were on your way to suprise your babies

you knocked on that gym door and suga peeks his head out like

“hello? who is i— MY BABYLOVE!”

this nigga screamed that shit so loud the third years were ALERTED

there’s only one babylove and thats YOU honey

suga damn near jumps you

like he hasnt seen you in so LONG

“i missed you suga! im back for good now!”

“missed you too!! thats amazing!! also. WHY DIDNT YO ASS VISIT ME EARLIER? I HAVENT SEEN YOU SINCE SUMMER LAST FUCKIN YEAR.”

sugamama’s out and he got your ear.

now kiyoko heard ya voice and that girl was zooming

suga and kiyoko pull you into the gym

second years and first years went

DAMNNNNNNN

asahi ran over there and tackled you in a big ass hug

now there’s a doggy pile of third years

and the rest have never been so confused

they havent even gotten a good look at you bc you got JUMPED by the third years

they deadass dropped their shit to get to you

“babylove its been so long!!” - kiyoko

this alr made nishi and tanaka go like 🤨🕶🤏🏽

like “whom?”

how you managed to avoid them is beyond me but girl you got your ways even tho yous a big bitch

kageyama deadass dont really care that much bc volleyball why tf this rando just bust up in here and take the third years....

n e ways

eventually they pull you up

they’re like DAMNNNNN again

bc GIRL YOU TALL TALL

like you can actually give asahi a forehead kiss

(which you have bc aint no damn way if i was in the third year gang i wouldnt give them affection poor baby prolly touch starved)

nishinoya and tanaka’s simp reflexes have kicked in they are def about to say some lightskin ass shit

daichi’s alr on defense

“ahnt ahnt let me introduce her. COACH UKAI can we take a min to introduce her?”

“...fine whatever just dont take too long”

“alr bet”

(i hc daichi, tanaka, and asahi got that negro in em so if you dont like that then suck my dick and you may think bc i am a woman i dont have one but i have a pink di—)

they introduce you

“this is l/n y/n. she was a first year manager with kiyoko until she had to transfer but now she’s back!” goodlooks suga

“any questions?”

“how are you so tall?” hinata

“ask another dumb question like that and i swear to GOD hinata.” sugamama

“can you play volleyball?” kageyama

“yeah i can. i play with ushijima”

I BEG YOUR DAMN PARDON?

USHIJIMA WAKATOSHI??? THE MAN WITH THE POWERFUL SERVE???

“what 😀” asahi

“can SHE PLAY WITH US????” - hinata

tsukishima cant even talk shit bc you really could rock his ass

he gotta look up at you he dont want no smoke lmaoaoao

they were just hounding you with questions now and suga a lil peeved bc damn yall cant pay attention in class and ask all these questions but as soon as our babylove comes in yall suddenly got shit to say? 🚶🏽‍♂️

“she’s hot, tall and plays volleyball? i mean shit l/n senpai...” - nishinoya’s thirsty ass

“ahnt I THINK THE FUCK NOT?” - daichi

oop

during this kiyoko just pulls you to the bench so you can just chat with da girlz

aka her and yachi

yachi fumbling and stumbling

like mamas you lookin real scrum-dilly-ious

“i-im yachi hitoka! nice to meet you senpai”

you’ve already adopted her

“i love you now. kiyoko can i take her in”

“she isnt a stray animal babylove.”

yachi’s a lil like???? yall got a poly thang happenin? is this whats going on?

you saw the confusion in her eyes

“they call me babylove since i used to act like like a lovin mother to em and i had a baby face”

(i suffer from baby face syndrome and istg if someone says i look like a lil kid one more time i’m gonna pop off like the fourth of july fym i look like a lil kid bitCH GET OUTTA MY FA— lemme stop being so aggressive in these)

“ooooh”

now we all know nishinoya is DOWN with the melanin.... and you sittin with the gorls lookin all... tasteful and melaninated.

is melaninated a word? i dont know but i will continue to use it even if it isnt

now he suddenly sitting beside you

“hey mamas”

excuse me? i beg your pardon?

“uh hello?”

stage 1 complete he’s now your simp lmao

“you’re beautiful”

“nishinoya if you dont get yo clown ass the FUCK up over here” daichi’s black ass and sugamama

“dAMN I CANT DO SHIT IN THIS FAMILY”

yeah they missed you and you def played volleyball

they made the mistake of letting you play on the team with daichi, suga, and asahi

you bodied they asses

even coach ukai had to hold in that snicker

you damn near beheaded hinata with that spike

that boy hit a note so high ms. ariana grande was given a run for her money

“YESSIRRRRRR” - you

the slangs are out and kageyama has never been so confused

static? bum ass bitch? tf that shit mean

(ny slang be confusing me too homie its alright)

yall right after they lost

but yeah eventually the first years warmed up to you

as soon as you affectionately patted kageyama’s head he was done for

that boy is ✨t o u c h s t a r v e d ✨

you fussed over yama and tsukki and they were sold

yama bc you were really sweet

tsuki? same reason but he aint telling you he said “im taking that shit to the fucking GRAVE”

das all bc baby im blanking out and i’m doing stupid like kaminari after he short circuits

[actualbird]

Hope you're doing well! ♥️

So I have a confession to make: I haven't played ToT for a whole week now. I'm kinda scared to go back in because of the new event, (the Christmas one) because I'm afraid I won't finish it in time but at the same time I don't want to miss out on it so I have just been sitting in this limbo.

I think I maybe burned out because I finished everything? So the only thing I looked forward to were the events (some of the events were brilliant, some not so much) and in my opinion, they aren't spaced apart enough for me to enjoy them. I play this game for the story so when there isn't much of it, it's hard to just even log in daily - keeping in mind I haven't missed a single day since I got the game.

I really hope we get new main and character stories soon because I can't see myself being interested enough?

I'm genuinely lost because I absolutely love this game!

I don't know, these are just my ramblings.

I'm 👌 this close to sending you angst about Luke dumping Marius and Aaron accidentally telling the NXX team about Luke's condition 😅

P.S. The recent Artem fic - first of all, how dare you make me tear up again? Secondly, I can imagine Artem grading himself after the appointments, like: Oh, the therapists didn't like what I said, I get an F!

LIKE NO! YOU CAN'T WIN OR LOSE THERAPY, YOU DUM DUM!

I just want to hug him! ♥️

Okay, that was a lot! Please take care! 🌺

hullo, hibiscus!!! i hope ur doing well too :DDD

ooooohhh i can relate to this sentiment!! i havent stopped playing but i deffo feel a big mood at "events coming in too fast to enjoy them" like yep yep. im STILL processing luke bday and now theres xmas partyland!! before that, i was STILL processing symphony of the night and then RRG part 1 happened gbsdjkgsd

tho if it's any consolation, the current event Xmas Partyland doesnt have any event plot like Symphony of the Night or RRG. it's just a boardgame thing, like Summer Breeze!!!

also not sure if i u kno but it seems tot wants the global server to catch up to the cn server (i talk about it here and here) so that global wont stay 1 year behind cn server forever. this has pros (more stuff at a faster pace) but also cons (MORE STUFF AT A FASTER PACE, IT'S HARD TO KEEP UP, also it's fuckin up some of the relationship development espeeeeecially mc and marius hoo boy)

based on the cn server, we should be getting the Personal Story 3 AND Main Story 6 installments in February of next year, 2022 (the pvs for them for the cn server was released at that time, 2021), but again, with how tot wants global to catch up, who knows if we're gonna get it earlier.

i'd REALLY LOVE IT EARLIER. i want the main and personal stuff earlier and the events a liiiiittle bit more spaced out bc tbh, i can only write so much so fast to respond to it all HAHA (im enjoying myself, yes, but im close to collapsing at the end of every day so UH)

anyway, if ur excited for more story already, i guess one solution is to watch/read translation of cn server content!!! ofc only if u want, i used to be somebody who didnt want Any Future Spoilers At All, but then luke pearce happened and now im in shambles, i know what happens in future personal story, im in pain SO MUCH PAIN BUT ALSO it rlly bolstered my excitement a bunch, if that makes sense?

sdkjfsbkjBJKSD LMAO AT THE ANGST, HIBISCUS. as always, im very open to receiving angst hcs OwO.....just be prepared for me to find some kinda way to give it a hopeful happy ending HAHA, i have trouble accepting bad endings, when it comes to love....

thank you for reading "designed to send mixed signals, one image made up of different pixels" :DDDD!! sorry for the tears tho skjfbkjBK AND UR RIGHT. YEAH. THATS AN ARTEM THING TO DO (and also something i did back when i was having therapy, OOPSIE DOODLE)

artem: can i see the grading rubrics for this?

dr reyes: artem, this is therapy. there are no grading rubrics.

artem: oh. oh no. what do i do now, then?

dr reyes: love yourself, ideally, but we'll get there.

take care as well, hibiscus!!!!!

[mypimpademia]

Bakugo, Kuroo, and Todoroki w/ a black s/o

Bakugo x reader, Kuroo x reader, Todoroki x reader

TW: Maybe some swearing

Bakugo

Damn does this boy love you

When he first saw you he was immediately attracted because you were different and not some extra that blended in

He wouldn't ever admit that though

And of course he's seen a black person before since his parents are designers and have models of all colors

He also takes extreme pride in you and shows you off almost as much as his quirk

Bakugo also secretly has pictures of all the hair products you use on his phone

So whenever you're about to run out you "miraculously" have another months worth of supplies

He helps you on wash days

Sometimes he does it voluntarily, sometimes he does it because you ask

If your hair is long and you ask him to help you blow it out or anything because your arms are hurting, (because the struggle is fucking real) he'll nag you the whole time about how you need to workout more or train your arms so he doesn't have to help you

"You damn brat, build up some fuckin' endurance so I don't have to waste my time."

He secretly loves helping you though because he loves your hair

If anyone gives you shit or looks at you weird because of your skin you best believe he's gonna try and kill them

If youre ever feeling bad about being different be ready for an extremely upset (in his own loving way?) Bakugo giving you every last reason why you being different is amazing and why you're amazing as a whole

He'll give you lil kisses all over 🥺 what a softie (dont call him a softie though he'll blow a fuse)

Imagine not being in love w him

Couldn't be me😗✌🏾

Kuroo

Another one that loves how different you are

He shows you off whenever he gets a chance

The first time he did it publicly was when he was at an away game

"THATS MY GIRLFRIEND"

Kuroo loves watching you do your hair

But he can't help you with it like Bakugo, because the one time he did you looked at your brush and it was full of perfectly healthy hair clumps

You almost killed him

You're the reason he has no phone storage

"I dont have storage to update Instagram..."

"Delete some pictures, you have too many."

"But I like the pictures I take of you..."

Golden hour pictures are a MUST on daily basis

Like he just loves the way you look in sunlight in general but you golden hour got him feelin some type of way

"Kuroo, I've been in this position for 10 minutes, and the sun is in my eyes."

"Just a few more pictures"

He always talks you into taking more pictures than you said you would

Kuroo knows you cant say no to him, and uses it to his advantage

"You have 20 copies of the exact same picture of me."

"Yeah❤"

Let him know if someone said something to you because of the way you look

This man is on their ass

If it happens in front of him, he'll deadass just stare at them

And its just a regular look, but the fact that he's 6'1 makes it terrifying

As irritating as he may be when he has you sit in the sun for an hour while he takes pictures, or rips out one too many strands of hair, you gotta love him

Todoroki

Its no secret that icyhot boi loves culture

So he's always asking you questions

And if you're willing to answer them or even tell him the history behind it, he'll listen while looking at you like a kid being told a bedtime story

You cant tell me he doesn't let you splurge on hair products while using Endeavors card after he pisses off Todoroki

"Baby, we're going shopping for hair stuff, get a 6 month supply."

"But I just got some the other day-"

"But I have my fathers card."

"And...?"

"And he pissed me off earlier."

Loves seeing you in the sun almost as much as Kuroo

He'll take you out every-other-day during the summer just to see your skin under the sun

Todoroki invited you over to swim once and golden hour hit while you were still in the pool

It was the most beautiful thing he's ever seen

"Wow... you're so beautiful."

From that day on, your contact name was "my god/goddess"

If someone looks at you funny, hes staring holes into their retinas

But if they say something??

Hold him back or someone's going into the hospital w 3rd degree burns and Todorokis gonna be on house arrest

[thompsborn]

do you have any spare ironhusbands or sambucky headcanons?

ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY

oh my god okay i’ve been so fucking wrapped up in both ironhusbands and sambucky and absolutely nothing else for WEEKS because of tfatws (obviously if you have seen my endless spam of reblogs but can you BLAME ME) and the portal closed has ironhusbands so i’ve been just. oh my god i am happily drowning in this and them and i do not need nor want air. ok.

also these are all hc’s based just in canon not au, and lol warning this got so long help me, though my brain is so scrambled from tfatws finale that all sambucky thoughts are scrambled and jumbled so i wasn't able to coordinate them as well as ironhusbands so the ironhusbands section is definitely longer pfighf i'm so sorry i'm like this

ironhusbands:

when they met at mit tony didnt know shit. like. like nothing. he didnt know a single god damn thing about anything. like he was a genius he could solve any equation given to him and baffled professors when he was handed like two supposedly impossible equations to this fuckin fourteen year old and he just looked at them with like a mcdonalds burger or some shit hanging out of his mouth and just answered them no problem, but he was still such a hopeless idiot, and rhodey, also a genius attending as a sixteen year old, had to teach him the basics of life, like. making toast. tony how do NOT know how to make toast. its TOAST. you put it in the TOASTER. have you NEVER SEEN A��OH MY GOD HOW DID YOU FUCKING CATCH IT ON FIRE—

he does not perfect the clearly impossible task of making toast until he is 17 and rhodey buys him a cake to celebrate the momentous occasion even though tony went though 528 toasters

you are gold by the national parks. thats it. thats all i have to say. listen to the song and look up the lyrics. you’ll get it.

and also paper planes by jon bellion but specifically for after rhodey tells tony he’s gonna join the air force and tony is worried but doesnt know how to show it and they have like a chill night in and all tony can think about is how stupid he is and how he’s such a coward because he cant get himself to tell rhodey that hi!! i love u!! and im scared to lose u and that you’ll get hurt and maybe die or smth!!

when rhodey finds out about how tony was raised (going with mcu, where tony wasnt physically abused but more emotionally neglected and ignored by howard and always talked down to and compared to others and wasnt treated like he was worthy and never was told he was loved and everything like that) he gets PISSED. like he is MONUMENTALLY angry. and it takes YEARS for him to find out about this too. and it actually puts a bit of a strain on their friendship for awhile when they meet too

like rhodey knows about the starks obviously and he assumes tony is going to be this obnoxious arrogant rich boy asshole and is so not looking forward to being roommates but he was raised to have an open mind and give everyone a chance, but tony was raised to be wary of everyone and keep his walls up and his emotions in shackles because whatever he shows can be used against him, so they clash, you know? they dont fight or anything but theres tension bc it isnt right and they dont get each other.

rhodey tries to be nice and tony doesnt understand nice because his only example of nice is jarvis and his mom and even then his mom and jarvis are always off with his dad so he barely sees them so its still rare for him to experience the nice of them so he doesnt know how to be around someone nice all the time, and so he gets defensive and thinks about how howard drilled it into him to be wary and he thinks maybe rhodey isnt ACTUALLY nice but someone PRETENDING to be

and rhodey starts to feel justified in assuming the worst about tony stark because tony is all cold and distant and rude and is about to stop the keeping an open mind thing about a month into their first year but then he comes back to their dorm early from class one day and tony doesnt come in so rhodey is just standing there and watches for a minute as tony sits there staring down at his twenty sixth attempt at a letter he wants to send his mom becauss he knows his mom likes letters even though he could just call but they havent really called him (howards fault but he’s fourteen still and its hard to rationalize that howards busy life and controlling thumb extends past his son) and rhodey is just confused because tony just suddenly sighs and sniffles a bit and murmurs “this is so stupid” and crumbles up the paper and throws it in the garbage and rhodey cant help but peer into it and barely sees the words hey mom scribbled at the top and that. that. hm. okay.

so rhodey keeps trying because he wasnt supposed to see that but he did and now he kind of has a feeling that maybe tony isnt all that cold and distant and rude as he seems, maybe he just doesnt really know how to be any different, so he thinks about all the subtle little ways that his family has shown him they care about him and starts to invite tony to go get food or to study together even though neither of them really need to study or to help each other with assignments or just anything thats mundane enough to not raise suspicion but still starts to open the door and make tony relax around him just that little bit and then before tony realizes it the end of their first year is there and theyre like friends or something and it hits him that he’s gonna miss rhodey.

for the first time ever there’s someone other than his mom and jarvis that he’s actually going to miss.

rhodey grins at him and says that they’ll be roommates again next year because they have to be and that the summer will be over before they know it and the sentiment is nice but tony spends the summer alone wandering around a house too big and empty after being in a dorm that’s small and has a friend.

but rhodey doesn’t know this. like he knows that tony isn’t the kind of guy he originally assumed but he doesn’t know that he’s literally ignored and neglected and like emotionally and sometimes verbally abused so he’s kind of surprised when the next year begins and they DO end up being roommates again (because tony kind of asked his mom, on a rare day when he got to see her and howard wasnt around, to get mit to make sure they could be) and tony just HUGS him like its been years and they’ve known each other forever but he goes with it and hugs him back because maybe tony’s just more affectionate once he gets to know someone and rhodey is okay w that.

they get closer as the years go by and they graduate from mit together and they’re BEST friends and at the end of the year rhodey invites tony to spend new years eve w his family but tony cant bc howard is having some kind of gala starting at 5 because hes weird and dumb and tony hates it and he also isnt given the option of not going even though he doesnt want to but the entire way there howard drills into him about not fucking up and berates him for all the times he has in the past and when they get there tony is already just not feeling it so he’s like nope!! no!! i simply cannot!!

so he goes in and finds an exit thats in the back and he leaves and finds a fucking payphone of all things and he has rhodeys home number memorized for years now and he calls and someone he doesnt knoe answers and theres music in the background and voices and tony’s entire stomach is in his throat and his heart is sunken into his twisted gut because he just wanted one night where maybe he could smile next to his parents and feel like he fit with them but he couldnt have that and he asks to talk to rhodey and then he is and asks if its too late to accept his invite and rhodey is like yeah of course do u need my address bc its still only 5 pm and its a 2 hour drive between south philadelphia and manhattan so he’d make it with plenty of time before it got to midnight so yay

and tony is like. oh. hm. i dont know how to drive actually. that was a thing that no one ever thought to teach me even though i asked about it about ten million times. and rhodey is used to tony not knowing how to do things that most people their age can (see: the toast) and plus its not uncommon for people from new york to not drive anyway so he doesnt think anything of it and instead asks for tony’s address to come pick him up instead and they’d still make it back by like 9-9:30 so that would work too

and thats when tony is like. well.

about that.

he might be calling from a payphone.

on a random street corner.

and its kind of raining. and he’s cold. and he’s a bit dulled out from everything so he doesn’t really think about the fact that admitting this is going to lead to having to explain what happened and also why and that is happens often. but that doesnt matter because he kind of just wants to be with his best friend and not back at that gala with his dad right now.

rhodey is like,,, ok. ok. wheres a coffee shop nearby u can wait in. and tony thankfully is by a 24 hour one and tells him the name and the street corner its closest to and rhodey is like i’ll be there asap and tony goes and he waits.

a two hour drive turns into an hour and a half because rhodey is Worried™

but when he walks in tony goes from being all dulled out to being all HOLY SHIT because rhodey has a SPLIT LIP and he’s like WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED WHAT THE FUCK WHAT

and rhodey’s like no no its good my uncle was having fun and trying to wrestle with me and he accidentally elbowed me its all good man dont worry about it

tony isnt used to accidentally being hurt tho so he’s still like hmmm but he takes rhodeys word on it and they head out and tony wont say what happened or why he was calling from a payphone ?? which btw tony literally only was able to do bc there happened to be dropped change on the ground because boy would not have change on him ok, but rhodeys like alright lets go with this for now

so they gets to the rhodes house and it is in full swing with family and extended family and adopted family bc they are 100% the family that just adopts the neighborhood kids and the people who have no one else and like ex boyfriends and ex girlfriends even after the relationship ends bc they still are family despite not dating whoever it was they had been dating in order to be introduced to them so its a LOT of people and tony is like. this is semi familiar in terms a lot of people but this is NOTHING like what he has ever seen before holy fucking SHIT

rhodey is just like oh u have a small family then? so ur used to smaller gatherings?

and tonys like wtf are gatherings

and rhodey is starting to get a feel for what might be wrong but just takes tony inside to get him changed because he’s not spending new years eve at the rhodes house in a fucking expensive suit ok

tony is completely out of his element and like he’s not the only white guy there bc again the rhodes adopt people and those people are of every race and nationally you can imagine but he just isnt used to the vibe there are people laughing and sitting close together and playing games and theres music playing but not like classy music its music people can dance to and are dancing to and the food isnt the food he’s used to at galas and shit and nothing is what he’s used to and he just sticks to rhodey’s side like a fucking lost puppy and tries his best not to look like an idiot when rhodey introduces him to people and a lot of them know who he is but dont judge him or assume shit about him bc obviously if he’s friends w rhodey then he’s a good guy and they want to know him and thats enough

but tony is v overwhelmed bc what the FUCK IS HAPPENING this is nothing like anything he has ever experienced EVER

so eventually rhodey can tell he’s getting overwhelmed and takes him inside and lets him have a breather and then asks him about whats going in and thats when rhodey learns about what tonys life at home is really like and. anger.

SO MUCH anger

because not only has every single assumption he has ever made about tony been proven wrong, but now he knows that the best person he knows has never been treated the way he deserves and has never known a true home and comfort and love and safety and

and he’s gonna fix it

and this is the first step

so he takes tony back out and they’re still just friends but this is the day they both quietly realize they might kind of definitely like each other as more because tony is still so confused by the fact that what he knows isnt the normal and overwhelmed by how much there is and how different it is but rhodey holds his hand as a grounding point and whenever it might be too much they move off to the side where they arent completely gone but its less hectic and a bit more quiet and its just nice

tony goes to rhodeys house for every holiday despite whatever howard says

rhodey decks howard the only time they ever meet before tonys parents die and he has the most shit eating grin on his face afterwards that tony cant help but lose his shit laughing his ass off

anyway i didnt mean to ramble for so long about that specific idea so i’ll end the ironhusbands ramble with this one last thought, which is as follows:

rhodey gets hurt in the air force at some point, and it isnt that bad tbh but he does have to go the hospital and shit and gets stitches or whatever idk i dont know what specifically happens i just think it’d be just bad enough that it takes him a few weeks to be able to go back to work but he’s not like OH GOD HURT yk?

but like stated above tony was scared and worried when rhodey told him he was gonna go into the air force so he hears about this and they’re probably like almost 30 at this point because they’re dumb and it takes them forever to get their heads out of their asses (i say this even though in the portal closed it takes them even longer but i digress) rhodey has like his mon his sister his niece visiting him and they were worried but they know hes fine so theyre just talking and in a good mood and then—

door slams open. tony stark enter stage left. disheveled suit, fresh from a meeting he definitely was not supposed to leave, having flown in from maibu the second he heard and then had happy drive him and then got impatient because of traffic and ended up sprinting like ten blocks while happy was like what the FUCK

of course rhodeys family are well aware that these idiots are desperately in love with each other so they’re just like lol ok and just leave the room while tony starts fretting over him like he’s about to die himself if he doesnt know if rhodey is okay and rhodey is like tony tony dude tones stop tony im okay tony stop it

until finally tony just fucking breaks down like full on tears in his eyes voice cracking hands clasped as he leans against rhodeys bed and tells him that he was so scared and he is so scared all the time whenever rhodey is out there because all he can think about is losing him and him getting hurt or dying and it’s maddening and this is when they get their heads out of their asses and kiss for the first time

(irony at its finest bc later when they are married and tony becomes iron man rhodey refuses to not have a suit of his own because if tony is going out there in a metal flying tin can then he isn’t going alone and wow what a power couple)

sambucky:

firstly i’m going to go post tfatws, but i’ll make a bullet point before going into it so if you wanna read up until that point you can but most of this will be random little headcanons based post tfatws

also it isnt like a whole plotline thing like the ironhusbands ones ended up being these ones are more random and kinda all over the place but loosely connected

update from after writing this: i lied

let me start by saying my interpretation of why they are the way they are in civil war is because of steve

thats not saying steve is the bad guy i mean to say that they’re jealous of each other because they thought that THEY were steve’s best friend who the fuck is THIS guy i dont want him here go away

children. they are children.

which i find very funny to imagine from sams pov because he literally is a licensed therapist and would 100% recognize why he’s acting how he is but he’s petty enough to do it anyway

and also he literally was helping steve track bucky down but i like to imagine that sam didnt think they’d ever really find him again and it’d just make him and steve like super mega best friends or something because hes a CHILD

and then from bucky’s pov steve goes through all this trouble to find him and protect him and then this random guy is acting like steve’s best friend and gets to sit in the front seat ??? bullshit. absolutely bullshit. worst thing ever. so stupid.

its so funny to me okay its SO funny

its like that schoolyard thing where your friend makes another friend and you hate it so much that you do something stupid like color on their drawing or put gum in their hair or whatever but they’re adults with 1. super soldier serum or 2. a superhero reputation/avengers status and suit with wings. so thats a thing.

post civil war i dont think they get much yk. because bucky is out in cryo and team cap is on the run and i doubt theyre able to return to wakanda much, if at all, and then it’s infinity war and then it’s endgame and after endgame there’s the aftermath and the aftermath is a mess

i like to think they have some moments before tfatws though. not many but enough for that slight foundation thats we can kind of see in episode 2 yk.

okay NOW it gets into post tfatws so!!

SO post tfatws everything is different because now they not only have spent all this time together, but they understand each other in a way that they didn’t before. in a way no one ever has. not even steve, who may have known them before, but he isn’t here anymore and he wouldn’t understand who they are now vs who they were before and it’s different.

bucky finds comfort in sam’s home town. sam finds comfort in watching bucky find a home there and he doesnt know why.

also sam treats redwing like a puppy and lets him fly around on his own and gets pet and stuff and bucky acts annoyed but the longer it happens you can tell he’s like “oh my god why is this thing endearing”

bucky has nightmares and sam knows this but bucky doesnt know that sam also has nightmares until one night when they’re still in sams home town and they’re staying on the boat because sams nephews are having a sleepover with some friends and they didnt want to get in the way or smth idk i just want an excuse for them to be on the boat and somewhat secluded from people but bucky already woke up from his nightmare and is out on the deck to get some fresh out and then oop

sam havin a nightmare too

because fucking of COURSE sam has nightmares he has been through some shit too!! not being able to catch riley and everything that happened since meeting steve and thanos and he turned to dust alone in the bushes ok like yes everyone that died were traumatized undoubtedly (peter my baby boy baby im so sorry that you got the worst of it) but bucky was around people but sam was laying on the ground and probably just watched his hands as he disappeared and he was alone and like. jesus christ ok.

and then steve trusted him with every weight and everything that comes with the shield not knowing how much more the shield has when he gave it to a black man and just like he has nightmares everyone in marvel does its a fact

but bucky finds out like this and he is shocked even though he realizes he probably should have been able to guess that this is a thing and he knows so much more about sam now than he ever did but this is how he learns more. he learns about riley. he learns so much.

sometimes bucky has those like “oh shit” moments where he’s like “maybe i was kind of a dick to someone who didnt deserve it” and he already had one of those with sam about the shield but he has another one because he assumed shit about sam when they were being all childish and jealous about someone else being friends with steve but like fuck

steve and sam probably got it

the not catching someone. the way it felt to try and to reach out and to miss and to have to choice but to watch as they fell.

what’s different is that steve got bucky back. he got to have that relief, eventually, even if there was the pain of knowing bucky had been taken by hydra, but at least he knew bucky had made it.

sam didn’t have that. riley didnt make it.

therefore, bucky has his “oh shit”

and bucky was already going soft around the edges with sam (as clearly seen in the last two episodes of tfatws, ESPECIALLY the finale because like did tou SEEZ ALL THE HEART EYES oh my GOD) but it’s this that really makes something in him melt and he just. he loses the last remnants of whatever tension or resentment or whatever negative feeling he may have been clutching onto.

there wasnt much left. but now theres none. now its all washed away.

its gone, and he gets it.

sam is a licensed therapist and he knew the reason he was being all dumb and childish and jealous with bucky was because steve had another best friend but also because steve’s other best friend was the guy that had been a big factor in how him and steve understood each other and how they bonded and it

it had kind of felt like they lost part of that when they found bucky again in civil war and he kind of wanted to blame bucky for it even though he didnt actually blame him at all so all it translated to was that dumb kind of jealous thing instead

but now it’s just them. its sam and bucky and it isnt steve and it isnt about steve and it shouldnt be because its about them. its about the boat and the water and the way they sit and watch the waves while the silence settles over them and the way that bucky says, “im sorry.”

its the way sam says, “me too.”

and bucky says, “you dont have to be.”

its the way they stay there until sarah comes to get them for breakfast and sams nephews convince them to play with them and their friends and the world is still shit and there is so much to do but

but its this and its them and that can wait

it can wait

they can take their time if they want to

maybe they’ve earned that much, at least

(it isn't a fast development because they're a complicated pair and there's so much to the two of them that need to figured out individually before they can even realize how well they work together, but the steps are so much easier knowing that they have the other in their corner and bucky knows that sam's home town is a place he's welcome to go and sam helps him make his own dreary little apartment into something that feels real and tangible with a bed and a couch and when they've become something that resembles stable and they've found a balance and they're okay, that's when they realize that maybe they can try for the more that sometimes bubbles under their skin and that they started to think about the more they spend time together. the warmth that sam feels every time he sees bucky playing games with his nephew and the smile that bucky has to fight to hide and still can't fully suppress when sam stands tall and proud with the shield in its rightful place, and it takes time, it takes work, it takes carefully placed bricks to build the foundation they need, but they get there, and when they do...

when they do, they're already happy, and it just makes them happier, and that's what makes it so much better.

that's what makes it worth the wait.)

[icharchivist]

cries think I made my ask too long so like half of it got deleted bc I typed it right into the askbox. anyways. I come bearing a3 thoughts! at first i was gonna watch the spring/summer and autumn/winter ones and then give my thoughts on both but. turns out i had too many thoughts lol? which i shouldve expected but i actually kind of... got bored by the first two chapters of this event! so i skipped and went to the stranger. and then went back. (1/?)

and then i got to like "tsuzuru and kazunari are having a fight?" and jumped on that like a starving wolf bc helllll yeah! i rly adored kazunari in sardine search, i think he was great! hes just so nice and has good vibes. he and taichi are kind of similar i feel? but i think their respective ages contribute to a lot of difference in their characters. why does it feel like this askbox limit personally wants me dead. (2/?)

anyways! i rly enjoyed the improv scene devolving to a real fight. admittedly i was kinda surprised that the content of that improv wasnt rly too similar to their actual fight? like normally a3 has the story of the play run parallel to like the actual real character drama so i thought the improv might function as the play in this event... it was still good tho. the scene i mean. (3/?)

also i rly liked tenma ragging on them afterwards. like he was mean but. first i adore tenma. second he just felt like. a different meddling type to muku lol? like the vibes he gave me were always like... im going to be a considerate leader and watch out for the ppl under me! therefore im gonna make sure theyre doing fine! aggressively. i think tenmas also just like a friendly person who likes to take care of others in general? like im not saying hes omi or anything but just like. (4/?)

that time he offers his car ride to juza so they can go to school together like hes surprisingly open compared to his initial prickliness. also ive got thoughts abt the tenma juza SSR conversation thing i read. one day ill make a tenma and juza fic and complete a trifecta haha... but thats something for another day! back to the actual story. the way tsuzuru dives right in after kazunari! that was so nice. like its easy to see how much they care abt each other. (5/?)

to the point where like even while theyre fighting theyre like angry but still like fairly quiet bc i think theyre both at least trying to be considerate of each other. ah the moment kazunari didnt respond to tsuzuru trying to talk to him i KNEW he was sick tho. felt proud of myself for calling that one but also the reason i knew is bc i have used the "character being sick during an argument causing them both to make up with each other" trope myself before so uh. like recognizes like haha. (6/?)

anyways the cg there was fuckin beautiful like kazunari looks so sad in the middle bit but then u see his shy smile? like hes sick but hes also like. happy to be there. idk. lovely. i adore kazu i think hes just deeply sweet to other people. tsuzuru telling him "you make everyone around you feel as bright and cheery as the things you design” is so wonderful too (7/?)

now im thinking. ah tsuzuru probably feels quite drained after a script and such (i know i am when i finish any piece--its like the emotions just rush out of me) so i like to think that like yknow. kazunari dropping by his room or whatever helps him set himself back to normal! but also when tsuzurus like oh u left ur magazines here! i suddenly remembered. wait shit kazunari and tsuzuru arent even roommates. wonder how much they bother masumi lmaooo. anyways overall very good story! (8/?)

some more thoughts: itaru and citron were so cute in this event! just like. citron saying itaru winking makes his heart skip a beat and itaru quoting citrons wrong sayings (which. i am also guilty of today i told my brother "we'll jump that bridge when we cross it" so) also i love how yuki is like "thank god i wasnt partnered with that hack" but like. yuki. u could literally just not talk about him. like its so funny to me yuki is like wow i hate tenma but he wont shut up abt him haha (9/?)

i also was a lil taken aback at hearing itaru go "for the lulz" tbh... like it fits him. but im mad it fits him? anywaysss thats all i had for this one! im gonna watch autumn/winter and go say my thoughts on that soon. sorry the ask was so broken up, idk what happened!

OLA FRIEND! Glad to see your thoughts again omg :3c

tho omg the fact tumblr deleted it all + the ask limit was all so evil D: poor friend.

I'm putting my answer under a read more because. Well. *waves hand* it got long.

The non-play events can be perhaps a little harder to get into because unlike the plays events that you start with a clear idea of at least the main plot (re: "they are preparing a play, i know the leads so i know who it will focus on"), non-plays events take a little longer to first set up what event they're participating in, how to prepare for it, and then bring up the conflict and which characters are going to have something to do with said conflict. So i can understand that they're a little harder to get into when we know the plays awaits.

On top of that, the first few events still were a bit tame because since it was early when the app released, i think they didn't go too heavy at once in case some people were still stuck on earlier chapters (esp since especially Winter is hard to unlock)

ANYWAY glad that it sucked you in on the second read :3c

So glad you were invested in that conflict!

Totally agreeing with you about Kazunari, and very good point about Taichi as well! they aren't the Puppy Pair for nothing :'D (Yuki took one look at both of them together and just Knew. His suffering knows no end (lovingly)). But yeah i think they have a lot in common, they both are the really bright and friendly figure, both also started in overcompensating a bit because both wanted to be popular in some ways.

But we do have, on one hand, Kazunari who wanted that rather late in his life while Taichi always thrived for that, the fact Kazunari made friends easily and it's just that he was scared of getting to the next level, while Taichi always struggled with this quest for popularity. In a way too both of them were at least scared to share a part of them, Kazunari worrying to show his thoughts, and Taichi being a spy and all of that... which impacts them really differently considering the guilt it puts on Taichi. And then you add their age into the mix, especially the fact Kazu is the oldest of his troupe and Taichi the youngest of his, it makes them fairly similar all while being fairly different.

both are so interesting to me and i love them bothhh, so it's always nice to see them have focus.

admittedly i was kinda surprised that the content of that improv wasnt rly too similar to their actual fight? like normally a3 has the story of the play run parallel to like the actual real character drama so i thought the improv might function as the play in this event

i love how you are seeing the patterns a3 tends to do it's so neat!

It's true the fight isn't really similar to their actual fight, though i do love that they had "swapped" their personality for the act and ended up insulting each other for theirr swapped personality. Like, Kazunari insulted part of himself in Tsuzuru's character and Tsuzuru did the same?? and then the fight escalated and the way Kazunari broke character hurts bc it's really that Tsuzuru hit where it hurts. But yeah it still wasn't too relevent to their actual fight, though i think the thing is that their fight was as such mostly because they tend to clash often due to their personalities rather than just this singular reason why, so to have the play go more "it's their personalities the problem" kinda hurt lol. But yeah still agreed that it didn't reflect much on the plot itself

I was rereading the improv bit to answer correctly and man since we're going to talk about Tenma next, i just. Love that when Kazunari, breaking character, his eyes sad, tells Tsuzuru "you have no rights talking to me like that..." it then cuts on Tenma being upset. Bc like. Exactly like you say, he wants to look out for the people under him. and like. Kazunari is his friend. A friend he also snapped at once and insulted for being who he was, so he probably could have relived a bit of his fight with Kazunari seeing those two fights; Except that now Kazunari is one of his closest friend and he doesn't like that.

Also like. It was also because he could still hide under the plot of the improv but it's so rare, and it never happened before that point, that Kazunari stands for himself in a "the way you treat me is unfair"? Like again re: his fight with Tenma, when Tenma snapped at him, while Tenma was unfair with him, Kazunari took the blame, called himself annoying and all yaknow?

The fact Kazunari is starting to accept that he can take more place for himself is something the whole Summer Troupe have been trying to help him work on, but especially Tenma. Tenma is always there trying to push Kazunari to say what he means, to express his feelings, to stop hiding.

And for once, Kazunari does that in front of everyone... and it's because he's breaking because of his fight with Tsuzuru.

I think Tenma probably felt it was even more of a reason to get involved like, this is the thing he's been working on with Kazunari about, and now he's being all hurt about it, not on Tenma's watch!

And i totally agree with your take on Tenma! (and would LOVE to read the Tenma and Juza fic once you get to it :3c). I think, Tenma is really caring and is trying to take a place as a caretaker and all, but unlike Omi, he has absolutely no reference for it.

Omi is the eldest of multiple brothers and everything indicates his parents have always been lovely to him. Add to it how he ended up leader of a delinquent crew he was clearly looking after, Omi has a history of taking care of people, of nurturing them, and he knows what he's doing. Meanwhile Tenma grew up on TV sets, mostly surrounded by adults and not by people his age, mostly getting advice from being ordered around by directors i think. And his parents are distant, hyperfocused on their job, not really nursing with him. So Tenma meanwhile really didn't have a family emotional support and was in situation where he couldn't befriend other kids his age. His only reference was probably Igawa (his agent) and i think for a long time he didn't exactly see it, and Igawa remained mostly professional so there was probably the idea of it not being sincere? That Tenma had to grow out of.

So like, they're both extremely nurturing and caring, but my point is that Omi has experiences in it and is at ease with it, while Tenma has been so alone and in places were he had no support system that even if he wants to support others, he still struggles with how to do it because he has no set exemple. And that's his development in the main story arc, to learn from how Izumi shows she cares in order to care back at them all.

Like i mean the way Tenma yelled at them about their mistakes at first feel like he would have picked it up from some directors on TV set yaknow? Probably hearing them say that with no consequences on others actors, seeing it worked, didn't think "that's an abuse of power and the actors probably all think badly of their director for that" but "wow that works", tried it on his troupesmates and realized this is... not how that works. And it's spending time watching how Izumi encourages them that have him fix his way to approach it.

So yeah i got lost too into it but like. I feel you on Tenma i love him so much and i love his development so to see him get pissed and involved there? was really nice. even if he was aggressive about it. He's still learning.

ANYWAY back to Tsuzuru and Kazunari, totally agree with what you say next. They still care a lot about each other and yeah they're at a point where this consideration they have for each other make their anger more quiet than trying to attack one another (Banri could NEVER-). so yeah totally agree with you!

DLKFJDLKF i LOVE the reasoning on "recognizing that Kazunari was sick". Your writer's powers making you see through... *coughs* unlike Tsuzuru....

AND YEAH ALL YOU SAY ABOUT THE CG.. YEAH. Kinda crying thinking about it again now LDKJFLKDJF It's just. Everything about it is so soft and tender. The things Tsuzuru tells Kazunari are soo so sweet sobs. They're just adorable i love those kids. and also i feel you for Kazu he's just that great huh?

The whole set up about Kazu dropping by his room is so so cute! I love it! Like probably the very first time Tsuzuru braces himself because "oh no i'm not in the mood to stand mister hyperenergy himself" but Kazunari quickly adjust his energy so that Tsuzuru can just recharge without being overwhelmed. Yes it would drive Masumi completely nuts. Which i think is a plus for Tsuzuru like, hey, if Masumi gets annoyed once in a while it's a win. But yeah also i think that Tsuzuru and Kazunari should really have the Artistic Soldiarity of Students in Art school Probably Working Until Very Late To Complete Their Projects. Would love if at the end Tsuzuru gave it back yaknow?

but yeah their story was really nice i'm so glad you liked it! :D

oh god yeah Itaru and Citron were SO cute in it too, i also love the comments Citron makes about Itaru's winks. Just there flirting in front of everyone like those two embarrassing friends huh. (probably with Muku being all starry eyes considering he greatly admires both Itaru and Citron and, well, Romance.). And yeah i love how Itaru ends up so much into Citron's rhythm (and this idiom you said? is glorious actually, 10 points for you)

DLKFJDLKF what a call out toward Yuki. "yes i hate Tenma,no i won't shut up about him, also if YOU say you hate Tenma i'm going to stab you with my needles, have a nice fucking day.". I love their dynamics so much aha

And yeah Itaru is there cursing us the whole time with the fact he's the greatest nerd ever and it fits him perfectly. It makes me laugh so hard.

Thank you so much for having shared your thoughts there! it's always a blast to read through them and i dearly enjoyed it! (+ it makes me relive the event a little and it makes me soft!)

I'm so glad you enjoyed it! So glad you had so many thoughts about all of this, what a blast.

thank you for sharing, and looking forward the Autumn/Winter reactions :3c

Take care!

[crash-cinematic-universe]

Holographic Sand is a Kickass Band Name

pairing: peter maximoff/OC(graciella decuerpo) (high school AU/not canon)

summary: peter learns that a fuckton can change in the course of a week

warnings: none? bad language and peter is simp but thats it

notes **please read**: Heyyyyy how are you doing? good? that’s great. so ik this fic is a peter/oc fic, but honesty i only use her name a few times and a few defining features but like. thats it. so you can totally just imagine urself in her position. also this fic is 5,550 words exactly. that’s the most ive ever written and I am SUPER fucking proud. I think i might become one of those blogs where i write super huge monster fics that im proud of instead of just writing to fill requests.if u dont want that then just lmk and i will not do that. i dont know. maybe. also this fic is peter centric because uh it is. anyways enjoy <3

taglist: @creator-appreciator, @simonsbluee

--------

Monday

           Peter sat across the room, his arms crossed neatly on top of his knees as he rested his chin on his forearm. He wasn’t paying attention to the lesson being taught in front of him, in fact, he wasn’t paying attention to anything at all. No, Peter was lost in his head again. Peter’s mind was a chaotic minefield of music and cheesy one-liners and random facts that he seems to just know. But this time, he wasn’t envisioning himself beating up a police officer or playing with Pink Floyd. This time, he was picturing a perfect world where nothing ever happened yet nothing was ever boring. Peter had built a utopia in his mind-- a kingdom created to his exact preferences. A blissful tower of joy and happiness and energy and satisfaction. A paradise where he stood on top of the world with Graciella DeCuerpo, the pretty girl from algebra  class, standing right next to him.

          Now, Peter was well aware that the pretty girl from algebra  class had no idea who Peter was. The pair had never exchanged more than a few words, but somewhere within those few words, Peter managed to decide that she was his soulmate. He’d created an image of her in his head that would make God weep tears of envy, the perfect personality for the perfect person.  Peter willfully ignored the fact that he was setting himself up for heartbreak as he imagined how nice it would feel to have her fingers intertwined with his. 

           All of Peter’s friends thought he was ridiculous, ‘you can’t love someone you don’t know,’ they’d say. Peter would only scoff and shake away their words. He absolutely can love someone he doesn’t know, it’s getting the other person to reciprocate those feelings that’s nearly impossible. However, that doesn’t stop him from fantasizing at night. That doesn’t stop him from imagining the various ways he’d confess his love to the pretty girl who doesn’t love him. Or maybe she does. Peter doesn’t know, he could never know; unless, of course, he worked up the courage to talk to her. 

          Scott constantly teased Peter about his one-sided infatuation, but Peter paid no mind to him. He was 100% content with his perpetual pining for someone who probably didn’t know his name. He was totally okay with the unending ache in his chest that would appear any time she walked by or met his gaze. Peter was alright with his ceaseless yearning and the eternal feeling of disappointment that overtook him every time he snapped out of one of his fantasies. He was a-okay with all of that.

          So, there he was, spacing out during biology class as Professor Hargreeves struggles to teach the silver teen about photosynthesis. The Professor looked at Peter with desperate eyes, soon deciding that having his usually energetic student be quiet and still was the silver lining of the situation-- no pun intended. Professor Hargreeves droned on as Peter glanced at the clock, counting down the minutes until 7th period. Counting the seconds until he got to see the pretty girl in algebra  class once again.

Tuesday

          6th period was always the worst part of Peter’s day-- the dreaded english class. There were many contributing factors to Peter’s hatred for this class; the professor was a bore, the material itself was uninteresting, and Peter could never seem to sit still or retain any of the words he read in english class. Worst of all, english class seemed to go on forever, leaving Peter to impatiently wait for the bell to ring and release him to 7th period. At the end of the period every day, he was practically vibrating in his seat. 

          “Can anyone tell me what Juliet’s suicide is supposed to symbolize?” the Professor asked expectantly. Peter couldn’t care less about the symbolism of some chick’s suicide-- he’d much rather be studying the features of his algebra  class infatuation. 

          She sat next to him yesterday. There were at least 5 other open seats and she sat next to him. Yes, Peter read too much into it and yes, Peter spent the entire class period trying to make himself seem naturally cool, but he didn’t care. Peter would act like the most desperate, pathetic, lovestruck loser in the world if it meant that she would like him. They didn’t talk, they didn’t exchange a single word, nevertheless, Peter was in a state of euphoria for the entire class period. 

          Sometimes Peter feels like a stalker. He watches her whenever he can-- he doesn’t follow her around or anything, but if she’s around, he’ll stare at her. He has her features memorized, the curve of her nose, the dark brown irises surrounding her pupils, the way that she always seems to have chipped black nail polish on. He sees the small things. He sees the way she bites her nails when he gets bored and he sees the way her leg never seems to stop bouncing. She hums the basslines to songs as opposed to the melody. 

          English class came to an abrupt end as the bell cut off the Professor’s teachings as well as Peter’s distant daydreaming. Peter was out of his seat within seconds, his notes and books quickly being swept up in his arms as he walked out of the room. The hallways are crowded and chaotic and busy, each individual student attempting to get to their locker then to their class on time. Peter watches as kids swing their lockers open, fatigue and weariness apparent on their faces as they disappear into their classrooms. Peter reaches his locker hastily, the few small posters of classic rocks bands adorning the inside of his locker door. A playful giddiness overcame his body as he made his way to algebra  class, a small smile left on his face.

          Graciella shows up across the hallway, her bright red hair catching his eye in a sea of brown and blonde and blue. His stomach flutters as they get closer and closer to each other, finally meeting outside of the classroom. Her eyes rise to meet Peter’s, and instead of pulling away, Peter keeps looking. She smiles at him before disappearing inside the classroom, and Peter felt his knees get weak. With a deep breath and a triumphant smile, he walked into the classroom.

Wednesday

          Lunchtime; possibly one of the most enjoyable parts of Peter’s school day. Peter is free to kick back and stuff his face full of whatever junk the school board deems nutritious enough for highschoolers. Usually, he ate lunch under the bleachers with his friends, but in some sick twist of fate most of them were absent. So, Peter was left to eat alone in his usual spot.

          The quiet was comfortable, refreshing. The gentle summer breeze would blow every few minutes and Peter would listen to the rustle of the leaves. There’s a certain tranquility to being alone; Peter can lay back and relax and just… think. No stress, no panicking, no--

          “Hey, uh, Peter, right?” Peter’s eyes snap up so fast he’s afraid they would detach from his head and fall out. His breath faltered and his hands began to shake a bit-- why was he so freaked out? She was just a girl; sure, she was the prettiest girl he’d ever seen, and yeah, he was madly in love with her, but that’s besides the point. 

          “Uh-- uh, yeah, P-Peter. That’s, uh, that’s me,” He chuckled awkwardly, desperately trying to stay cool. Peter was an awkward person, but he’d rather die than fuck up his chances with Grace.

          “You dropped this on your way out of class yesterday, I, uhm, didn’t get to return it to you until now,” She holds out a small key chain with three small keys hanging off of it-- Peter’s house keys, along with the key to his mother’s car. He quickly takes the key chain from the red-haired girl in front of him.

          “Holy shit, uh, thanks! I couldn’t get into my house yesterday so I guess you saved me from another broken window,” Peter held up his hand and showcased the scattered pattern of small cuts on his palm. Grace laughed lightly before gently running her fingers over the cuts on Peter’s palm.

          “Oh fuck, dude, these look pretty bad. Maybe keep a spare key hidden under your welcome mat or something,” Peter doesn’t fully process Grace’s words; he’s too preoccupied with trying not to collapse at the feeling of her fingertips on his palm.

          “Hey, you okay? You look… pale,” Grace pressed the back of her hand on Peter’s forehead in an attempt to check for illness, but that just made Peter’s skin erupt in goosebumps. 

          “I, um, I’m fine. I’m just st-stressed about the algebra  t-test on Friday, I th-think,” To be fair, Peter was stressed about the algebra  test. Peter may or may not have spent the entire class staring at Grace instead of, you know, learning the material.

          “Oh! Well, if you want, I can help you study. I’m also kinda worried about it, and I study better with other people,” Peter silently thanked god for what was happening to him.

          “That would be fuckin’ fantastic,” Grace smiled a smile that made Peter shiver.

          “Cool! Uh, I’ll give you my phone number and we’ll meet up tomorrow. One day isn’t much time to study, but it’s better than nothing.” She pulls a pen out of her backpack and rips a small piece of paper out of one of her notebooks. Peter watches as she scribbles down her phone number and hands the paper to him.

          “Thanks. For everything, the keys, the studying-- everything.” Grace smiled.

          “It’s no problem, Peter, really. I’ll call you later,” And just like that, she walked away. Peter was left alone under the bleachers, a wide smile plastered on his face as he read the piece of paper in his hands over and over and over again.

Thursday

          30 minutes. 30 minutes until Grace Reaper DeCuerpo, the prettiest, nicest, funniest girl Peter had ever met would show up on his doorstep. She would be inside his house for god knows how long. She would sit next to Peter-- either on the coffee table in the basement or on the floor of his bedroom. Needless to say, Peter was freaking the fuck out.

          The plan was simple: Grace shows up, they study, they get comfortable, and she goes home. Yet, in those four simple steps, so much could go wrong. Wanda could interrupt, his mother could lose her temper, Lorena could start crying-- worst of all, Peter could embarrass himself and drive her away. 

           Peter was in the middle of reorganizing his record collection for a third time when he heard a knock at the door. His blood went cold and an electric excitement ran through his veins. Peter checked his hair in the mirror one last time before running to the door. He stood silently, staring at the chrome handle hesitantly. This was his one chance. His only chance to make his perfect kingdom real-- Peter really, really, really didn't want to fuck it up. With a deep breath, he slowly opened the door.

          "Hey, Peter!" Her voice was smooth and melodic and it made Peter's heart light up. He’s about to respond with something smooth and witty when a squeaky voice chirps behind him.

         “Hi!! Are you the pretty girl Peter talks about?” Peter can physically feel his face turn bright red as he turns to see his six-year-old sister, Lorena, standing behind him. She’s wearing a purple princess dress that has a syrup stain on the sleeve. Grace laughs before stepping through the doorway. 

          “Lorena!” Peter groans in annoyance, a pleading look on his face. The young girl just giggles before scurrying away, her dress flowing behind her.

          “‘The pretty girl Peter talks about’, huh?” Grace grins at Peter cheekily. Peter runs his hand through his hair before motioning to the staircase.

          “God, Lorna is quite the kid. Well, uh, we can work in my room,” He sighs. “And Grace? Uh, m-maybe don’t let Lorena change your opinion of me,” She just smirks before walking past Peter.

          “Too late,” She called before disappearing down the stairs. Peter could hear the faintest trace of a smile in her voice. His heart skipped a beat as he quickly followed after her. 

          She was wearing a Pink Floyd t-shirt and holding a backpack with various pins on it-- her left ear was pierced in three places and her right in five. The earrings she was wearing were black, or maybe grey; her bright red hair blocked Peter’s view of them. She was wearing rings, some odd words engraved in the metal. Peter couldn’t read them from where he was standing. She was wearing a skirt with fishnets, her hand buried in the pockets that seem to have been sewn in herself. She has callouses on both her hands, but Peter knew that already. Her appearance would put Aphrodite to shame-- suddenly, Peter was much less confident in himself than he was before. He ran his hand through his hair again before reaching the basement.

          He held his breath as Grace looked around his room, her gaze lingering on the plethora of stolen signs and band posters covering the walls. She placed her backpack on the floor and walked over to Peter’s record collection, her fingers carefully flitting through the different albums. She seemed… impressed. It was then that Peter realized it had been silent for much too long.

          “Y’know I can, uh, p-play some music if you want me to. You can just pick a record and, uh, I’ll... play it,” Peter winced at his words, cursing himself for being so awkward in front of the girl he’d been pining after since the beginning of the year. He felt like everything had spiraled out of control, and he watched idly as it happened. Then, Grace shot him a smile and pulled out a record.

          “You have a good taste in music, Silver,” No one had ever called Peter ‘silver’ before. He liked it a bit more than he should. “Although, that’s not really a surprise. I had a feeling you were cool.” 

          “You think I’m cool?” Peter asked, shocked. He wasn’t sure he heard her correctly.

          “Oh, totally. I see you in the hallways sometimes and you always seem so… carefree. Genuine. I don’t know, I guess it’s just… you, ya know? You’re naturally cool.” Every syllable that rolled off her tongue shot euphoria through Peter’s veins. Grace DeCuerpo, the girl Peter Maximoff had dreamed of for almost a full year, was telling him that she thought he was cool. Naturally cool. 

          “I know a lot of people who would disagree with you on that one,” Peter joked. There was truth behind his humor, but of course, he didn’t want to get into his insecurities now. “They think I’m a total loser, which isn’t totally wrong I guess.”

          “Well those people are stupid,” She stated matter-of-factly with a smile. “Speaking of stupid, we should probably get to work.” Peter nodded before sitting beside her on the floor. 

          For three hours they poured over their algebra  books. They quizzed each other and checked each other’s work; Peter’s proficiency in simplifying radicals aiding them both. Every now and then their hands would brush against each other, or the conversation would stray away from school and into their personal lives. Peter learned that Grace had two brothers, one of which passed away when she was younger. Peter talked about Lorena and Wanda and his miraculous abilities in the same way that she talked about her hometown and her own abilities. The conversation was smooth and natural-- Peter didn’t feel like he was being too annoying or too chatty and there was seldom an awkward pause. The pair were content in their time together, not a single moment went by where one wished the other would leave. 

          Eventually, Grace had to go home. Peter wished that she could stay forever, but of course, that would be considered kidnapping. He walked her to the door, although Peter didn’t feel like he was walking. He felt like he was floating.

          “Well, I guess I’ll see you tomorrow, Silver,” Grace said softly as she turned to face Peter. She looked him in the eye and he could feel his stomach flutter. 

          “Yeah, I guess so,” She opened the door, but before she left, she froze. She turned to look at Peter once again. 

          “Peter?” she said. “You’re not a loser.”

Friday

          Peter could tell the second he walked through the front door of his high school that something had changed. The energy that radiated in the halls shifted from a dull buzz of boredom to a rush of anticipation. The students in the hallway looked the same as always; tired and anxious and wishing for the day to go by quickly. However, Peter wasn’t wishing for the end of the day, and he certainly wasn’t tired. He was determined and energized and absolutely terrified, because that morning Peter Maximoff made the most important decision a seventeen-year-old could. He decided that he was going to ask Grace out on a date. 

          Peter made the choice to keep this from his friends-- it’s not that he didn’t trust them, it’s just that Peter knew he would be teased for his infatuation. It’s happened before and it will happen again. He walked down the hallways with a brave face on, his eyes forward and his heart racing. Truthfully, the silver teenager was terrified of… well, everything. The looming image of a harsh rejection forced itself into his mind; the idea that she would laugh in his face made his heart break a tiny bit, even though it wasn’t real. Peter simply shook those images away and walked on. 

          The day flew by much faster than Peter was comfortable with, and for the first time ever, he was dreading algebra  class. He was terrified that he would walk through the door and have everything be exactly the same-- he feared that Grace would go back to not knowing who he was, just like before. Peter was alright with never being her boyfriend, but he didn’t want to be a stranger. He didn’t think he could take being a stranger anymore. 

            So, there he stood, staring at the door to his algebra classroom from across the hall. He felt confident and prepared himself for the task at hand. In four long strides, he entered the classroom. Grace was sitting next to an empty desk, her eyes stuck on the small notebook full of doodles on her desk. Peter watched as her eyes raised to meet his, a wide smile forming on her face as she motioned him over. 

          “Hey, silver! I saved a seat for ya,” she called, and Peter felt his knees get weak. He then decided that he would wait until after class to ask her out. 

          “You did?”

          “Of course,” She grinned. “I like you, dude, you’re my friend,” Peter’s heart fluttered as he sat down beside her. Grace shot an odd look his way before reaching out and placing a hand on his arm. “Hey, you look stressed. Don’t sweat it, silver, you’ll do fine. We studied for, like, 3 hours yesterday. You’re gonna ace it,”

          To be frank, Peter had forgotten all about the test. The real reason he looked so stressed was because he happened to be sitting next to the love of his life, and the love of his life happened to be touching his arm. 

          “O-oh! Uh, yeah, thanks. I was just nervous because of… the test,” The bell rang and class began, the professor strictly laying down the rules that were to be followed while the test was in session. Peter could feel the lingering touch of her hand on his skin. It made his head feel fuzzy.

          Peter soon came to learn that sitting next to Grace during a test was a huge mistake. He couldn’t focus on anything other than her-- it didn’t help that she kept shooting him glances from where she sat. The numbers and letters on the paper in front of him seemed to rearrange before his eyes, instead spelling out various taunts. He feels a little pathetic for how easily Grace can unravel him, but hey, he’s a teenager. 

          The silver-haired boy’s eyes were struggling to decipher the words on his page when a small folded square landed on his desk. It came from Grace’s direction, and a small smirk had formed on her lips as she solved equations. Hesitantly, he unfolded the paper and read the neatly written message.

          Hey silver :)

          Peter smiled softly. He quickly pulled a pad of post-it notes out of his backpack and scribbled down a quick reply.

          I have no idea what I’m doing. I think Professor Stedman decided to write our tests in hieroglyphics this time.

          He flicked the note onto her desk and quickly turned his face downward. Class would be over soon, and Peter knew he couldn’t turn in a blank test. He uses his enhanced speed to do his assessment in seconds. Sure, he was almost certain he’d barely reach a passing grade, but hey, he had bigger matters to focus on. By the time he finished, another note landed on his desk.

          That bad, huh? Looks like we better study longer next time. 

          Peter’s heart swelled a bit. He really thought the study sessions were a one-time thing. He’s overjoyed to know he’ll get to see Grace semi-regularly, even if he never manages to ask her out.

          I think I’d rather hang out with you without the looming threat of schoolwork. 

          That’s the closest Peter could get to asking her out. He put deep thought into every word, he examined the phrasing and checked the spelling of every word. His english teacher would be proud.

          That can be arranged ;) 

          Peter had no idea that four words could make him feel so much. He had no idea that 17 letters could make him want to scream in the middle of a silent testing period. His hand was shaking and his careful planning was abandoned as he scribbled back a reply.

          Oh yeah? What did you have in mind?

          Patiently, he waited. He waited for Grace to finish writing her response and he waited for her to toss the note back over. He didn’t wait for more than a few minutes, but it felt like hours. He was panicking, and he was sure she could tell. She was probably joking, right? She was probably writing an awkward clarification-- she was probably explaining that she would actually rather die than be around him for non-academic reasons. He braced himself as the yellow post-it landed on the center of his desk.

          My aunt owns a drive-in a few miles from here and she gave me keys to the projector room and the gate. She managed to snag a copy of The Exorcist-- I thought you’d like to join me during my midnight escapade tomorrow night.

          Peter’s heart stopped. For a moment, he thought his eyes were fooling him. Maybe this was all some sick joke. Maybe he was being set up. Maybe he’ll get in her car tomorrow and she’ll drive him into the woods and murder him. To be completely honest, Peter wouldn’t mind if she murdered him. Peter wrote his reply.

          Really? You want me there? I might be a drag. You could probably find at least 20 other people who would probably be more interesting than me.

          Grace frowned at his response, and suddenly Peter decided he never wanted to see her frown again. She wrote confidently, her words solid and sure.

          You? A drag? Impossible. I don’t want to be alone, and I don’t want to be with anyone other than you, Maximoff. 

          This note was his undoing. He couldn’t help himself, he read it over and over and over again-- he almost forgot to respond. He wanted to hold onto it forever, he wanted it to be framed and hung on his wall. Hell, he wanted it tattooed on his arm. Peter had never been so happy while taking a test, that’s for sure. He wasn’t sure exactly what to say; he went from heartfelt responses to witty retorts. Finally, he decided to be totally and completely honest.

          I wouldn’t miss it for the world.

Saturday 

          There was seldom a time in his life where Peter Maximoff felt wholly content. Even in the most peaceful moments, there was always something bothering him, there was always something to pull him back to reality. However, sitting in the back of Grace’s dad’s convertible with the seats down and the roof pulled back, his head resting on her shoulder as they watched a cheesy horror movie, Peter was as close to nirvana as he’d ever been. 

          Life had always been so hard for Peter. He’s always had to fight for his seat at the table, to claw his way into a state of mind that wasn’t a hellhole. It seemed as if the world was plotted against him; he was ostracized from society and taught that he, along with his closest family and friends, were monsters. He never met his father and his mother spent so long fighting her own battles that she forgot to love her kids. Peter had to steal to stay fed, and he had to do his best to raise his little sisters to be good people. But right there, right then? That wasn’t hard. Peter didn’t have to be anyone or do anything-- he just had to exist next to someone who wanted him. That was the easiest thing Peter had ever done.

          Peter wasn’t exactly sure how he got there. Of course, he knew that they had driven to the drive-in, but he wasn’t sure how he was the person next to Grace. They had spoken for one day, maybe two, and somehow he landed himself in the most perfect spot in the entire universe. Less than a week ago, she didn’t even know his name. Or, maybe she did. Maybe she was just like Peter-- maybe she had spent the past year pining for him, and finally she worked up the nerve to just talk to him. Maybe. Peter isn’t complaining either way.

          “Can I ask you a kind of cheesy question?” Peter is startled by the sound of his own voice. Grace sits up and glances at him.

          “Shoot,”

          “Do you-- well, uh, don’t read too much into this, but, do you believe in love at first sight?” God, he sounded awkward. 

          “Nope,” She said bluntly. Peter wasn’t expecting that answer, but he wasn’t exactly disappointed by it. “I mean, it’s kind of a stupid idea, ya know? Like, isn’t there a million poems and sonnets and books written about how love is this weird complicated monster of a feeling? I don’t think you can really love someone just by looking at them. You can love the idea of a person, sure, or maybe the look of a person, but you can’t love that person. Because a person is so much more than ‘first sight’,” she sighs. “I don’t know, maybe I’m being a killjoy. It just seems dumb to me-- dumb and, I don’t know, exclusive,”

          Peter stops to think for a moment. He steps out of his lovesick chaotic hellbrain and looks at his feelings from an outside perspective. He thinks back to the kingdom he created in his brain-- a kingdom built on a foundation of sand. Or, less than sand. Holographic sand, because the sand he built his kingdom on wasn’t real. He made a mental note that ‘Holographic Sand’ is a kickass band name, then resumed his impromptu soul-searching. She was right-- he could see  that now. Scott was right, too. You really can’t love someone you don’t know, because if you don’t know them, you fill in the gaps. You fill in the gaps with what you think fits, and then the other person stops being them and starts being parts of you. Peter suddenly felt weird.

          “I’m sorry if I said something wrong,” Grace interjects after a while. Peter hadn’t realized he’d been silent for so long.

          “You didn’t say anything wrong. On the contrary, you, uh, you made things a little bit more… right, in my brain. You somehow managed to take a little chunk of chaos and tame it, which is scarily impressive,” he joked. “Remind me to ask you your opinion on the meaning of life and the root of true happiness,” They’re joined in a chorus of laughter and Peter realizes that his little brain kingdom didn’t hold a candle to the red convertible he was sitting in. She slings an arm around his shoulders.

          “Y’know, I might not know the meaning of life, but I am pretty close to true happiness right now,” She says, softer than before. “Maybe the root of true happiness is you, Maximoff,” She chuckles. Peter smiles. He doesn’t want the ruin the moment-- god, he is desperately trying to keep himself from fucking it up, but he feels obligated to tell her about his year of pining.

          “Hey, uh, can I tell you something kinda pathetic?” He cringes at the way his voice trembled on the last word. 

          “Go ahead, Peter,” She used his name this time. Peter thinks she knows he’s about to say something mildly serious.

          “I’ve liked you since, like, the beginning of the year. You seemed so… cool. So nice. I saw you in the hallways and my stomach would get all twisted up and my head would hurt a little bit. It was like I was allergic to you, but I enjoyed it. That sounds weird. I’m sorry,” He stopped for a moment, attempting to take the buzzing mass of words in his brain and string them into a sentence. “I was too afraid to talk to you, so I, uh, asked around. I got other people’s opinions of you and then built a little version of you in my brain. I realize now that, uhm, the little brain version of you is like, way way worse than actual you,”

          When you talked to me the first time, you threw me off. I wasn’t really nervous about the test-- I mean, yeah I was nervous but that’s not why I looked so pale. I just wasn’t expecting for you to talk to me, like, willingly. So I lied because I was embarrassed. And I lied again in class yesterday. Because I was embarrassed,” He stopped talking. Peter felt like he was digging himself into a hole-- he felt like he killed the sweet sugary mood. 

          “Why are you telling me this?” Grace asked. She didn’t sound angry. She sounded a little confused, and she sounded like she was trying to help Peter decipher his brain. 

          “I don’t know, I guess I just feel bad. I feel bad for, uh, for not being honest I guess. I feel bad for being a coward,” Yep, definitely killed the mood.

          “Peter, you shouldn’t feel bad for being afraid, you know,” She assures. “I would’ve done the exact same thing in your position. Hell, I did do the exact same thing in your position,” That caught Peter’s attention.

          “What?”

          “You didn’t drop your keys in algebra. You dropped them somewhere in bio and my friend found them. She was gonna take them to the office, but I wanted an excuse to talk to you, so I said I’d return them,” Peter couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He was being pranked, he had to be. “Being awkward and weird is like a requirement in high school. Don’t sweat it, Maximoff, really. We’re all the same in that way, I think,”

          Peter felt a wave of relief wash over him. He was feeling too much at that moment, he was letting the bad drown out the good. He didn’t want to remember the day in a sad light.

          “I like you. A lot. Even if you are awkward and weird,” He smiles softly. Slowly, ever so slowly, he intertwined his fingers with those of the girl beside him. It was a simple display of affection, but it made Peter feel like he was floating.

          “I like you too, dork,” Peter smiled widely before placing his head back on Grace’s shoulder. Peter wasn’t paying attention to the movie, in fact, he wasn’t paying attention to anything at all. No, Peter was lost in his head again-- but this time, he wasn’t standing on a false kingdom with a false version of the girl he liked. No, this time, he was thinking about the very real girl beside him. He was thinking about the perfect world they had created in the small car they were in; a perfect world where he felt so much emotion and so, so safe. They had built a utopia in the back seat- a blissful tower of awkwardness and comfort and clumsy confessions. A paradise where he sat in the back seat of a Ford Galaxie with Graciella DeCuerpo, the pretty girl from algebra class, sitting right next to him.