#fuck you guys who are posting untagged stuff

[jankwritten]

I don’t wanna have to not be on tumblr until TSATS comes out but it’s looking like that’ll have to be the case if people don’t start tagging their fucking DIRECT SCREENSHOTS OF THE FUCKING PREVIEW. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST YOU ASSHOLES.

[19catsncounting]

I Got Really Into Anti/Proship Discourse And Read +30 Academic Studies - My Findings

(It’s a Yapfest but the whole post is a very long essay and study on morality and fiction and children’s safety and rape culture with a fuckton of freely accessible academic articles and resources on the subject, and I want to talk to other people about it. For a shorter abstract with all the articles and more easily ignored yapping, see my shiny new Carrd:)

It’s been a little shocking lately to have certain discussions with some parts of fandom. I spoke about shipping/harassment and how that contributes to the death of fandom on TikTok assuming that younger folks are just really, really intense about preventing sexual violence, but the more I saw the words “morally wrong” and “disgusting” and “addiction,” the more I thought about this guy-

That’s Jerry Falwell, and I fucking hate this dead guy. You see, Jerry Falwell was a preacher who hated porn, feminism, and homosexuality. And I'm seeing his rhetoric and reworked quotes a lot.

Jerry would say stuff like:

“Pornography hurts anyone who reads it - garbage in, garbage out.”

“Someone must not be afraid to say ‘moral perversion is wrong.’ If we do not act now, homosexuals will ‘own’ America!”

Jerry wanted people to believe that it’s possible to see so much sexual content that it warps your sexuality, because he was gay and wanted to think that was due to thinking about gay sex too much. Jerry did not have a lot of evidence to prove that homosexuality was harmful, so he relied heavily on how “morally distasteful” it seemed to be to suburban Americans.

I spent the majority of my teen years arguing against Jerry’s rhetoric for the right to live as a lesbian online, and I never thought I’d see morality rhetoric in people I’m otherwise very politically aligned with. And I definitely never thought fandom of all things, in all its beautiful subversive glory, would seriously start advocating for censorship, anti-porn, and to consume fanwork with moral purity.

So, I’d like to have a deeper discussion on it, both here on Tumblr and on TikTok, but that does mean checking a few things at the door:

Personal feelings decide your personal life. What you feel is valid for you, not anyone else.

In general, things that do not cause direct and undeniable harm should not be broadly prohibited just because they’re weird or distasteful to the majority of folks. Ex. Loitering does not cause harm and is a tool of systemic oppression.

The discussion of “fictional CSEM” is the most inflammatory fork of this and it is often used to derail these kinds of conversations. This is all I will say on it - the legal status of explicit visual depictions of minors is muddy. In the US, there is just one dude in Utah who pled guilty for possessing explicit lolicon he bought by mail order without also possessing CSEM with real children, and explicit writing about fictional minors has been settled as protected free speech. Dedicated organizations from the NCMEC to Chris Hansen have asked that fictional content is not reported as CSAM as it is not actionable and clogs up finite resources. 90% of NCMEC reports were not actionable last year. There are studies suggesting that virtual CSEM or other non-victim alternatives could reduce actual child harm, but there is need for further research.

We’re all in agreement that untagged NSFW is not cool, and kids deserve kid-only sections of the internet. People who are triggered by or dislike problematic content deserve to be able to not see it. 👍

 (I’ve seen the argument that blocking tags/people should not be required - sorry, PTSD still requires that you manage your triggers, up to and including swearing off platforms just as I have sworn off bars/soap brands/etc to avoid my triggers.)

I have found a lot of accessible and free articles and studies that I will link throughout so that we can discuss the fact-based reasoning, in an effort to have a civil conversation.

(Also because we are not flat earthers, we are Fandom, and if we’re going to be annoying little shitheels in an “Um Actually” contest, we’re going to have the sources to back it up.)

Minors and Explicit Material

I’m not supporting minors engaging with explicit material. I have such little interest in the subject that I’m not even going to bring in articles, but you can feel free to. I personally engaged with explicit material as a preteen of my own free will and did not find it to be harmful, and the majority of people throughout human history have been exposed to explicit material at an early age with varying degrees of harm. There are undeniable legal and harm-driven differences between a 12 year old girl looking at Hustler on her own, a 14 year old boy being sent nudes from a grown woman, and a 6 year old viewing PornHub. (And I think the guardians of that 6 year old should be charged with grooming just like the woman, tbh.)

Personal Disclaimer

I’m an adult survivor of CSA and incest. I’m a happily married adult. I don’t personally like lolicon/shotacon/kodocon. I don’t like kids. I don’t like teens. I’m personally not attracted to underage fictional characters. I have family, the idea of fucking any of them makes me want to throw up and die, so I don’t write or read RPF of my family.

I am really, really fucking intense about preventing sexual violence, supporting survivors, and fandom, which is where this all comes from.

I read and love problematic fiction - my favorites are ASOIAF, Lolita, and VC Andrews. The most “problematic” thing I’ve personally written are Lucifer/Michael fics from Supernatural back in 2012. They are “brothers” in CW Christ, not blood. They do not have any blood.

Gen Z and Online Grooming

In 2002, a survey of 1500 minors from 10-17 found that 4% had been solicited for sexual purposes by an adult online.

In 2023, that number increased to 20%.

While the linked 2023 Thorn report suggests that the vast majority of these inappropriate interactions happened on platforms that allow for interpersonal communication, which by and large minors were greatly discouraged from and had less access to in the early 2000’s, a trauma-informed approach does not allow for blame to fall on the children. The guardians of those children have monumentally failed to restrict and educate before giving children the means to access those platforms.

It is my uncited but personal opinion that the increased rate of grooming, as well as an increased interest in combating rape culture, has led to well-intentioned individuals to become digital vigilantes attacking those who they hold responsible for their traumatic experiences in a search for catharsis and justice denied for themselves as well as a desire to make the internet safer for other children, whom they are increasingly aware are entering online spaces unsupervised at distressingly young ages.

Is harassment and bullying bad for perpetrators of it?

Before we get into how ship-related hate campaigns do not affect predation or combat rape culture, we should acknowledge that it’s actually pretty harmful for the people who cyberbully. Not just in the legal/social consequences, but people who participate in cyberbullying and cyberhate campaigns have higher rates of depression, estrangement from their parents, self-effacing habits, social anxiety, lower empathy, and so forth.

One study suggests that the treatment and prohibitive for cyberbullying, which contributes to a culture of cyberhate and a lower likelihood to report or confront other incidents of harassment or toxicity online, can be combatted with media competency to increase empathy along with other important life skills.

Some Common Pro-Censorship Myths

“Pornography is Addictive/Consumption of Pornography Leads to Increasingly Hardcore Imagery And Ultimately Real-World Violence” - The American Psychological Association does not recognize Porn Addiction as real and the DSM-5 does not classify it as an addiction. Additionally, many methods used in articles claiming that porn is addictive or causes users to seek out more hardcore material were flawed or biased. There is actually some evidence that compulsive porn use, the closest you can get to a porn addiction diagnosis, is associated with shame and the user’s belief that pornography is morally wrong, which sex-negative attitudes encourage.

“Jaws caused shark culling” - That's unfortunately a simplification that ignores a LOT of surrounding context. WW2’s modern naval battles with an increase of ship sinkings and thus contact with sharks prompted the invention and use of shark repellant by aviators and sailors in the 1940’s. The most deadly and famous shark attack of all time was the USS Indianapolis sinking in 1945, which led to 12-150 deaths. The 1974 book Jaws by Peter Benchley, which was the entire basis of the movie, was inspired by One Fucking Dude who started shark hunting tours and overall seemed to have a really immaculate vibe. The interstate highways that finished in the 1950’s increased beach tourism in the 60’s and onwards, inspiring the American surf culture, further increasing the cultural desire to purge sharks for the new swath of beachgoers and their fondness for using surfboards which make them look like seals to sharks. Additionally, 1975’s Jaws inspired a huge desire for education about sharks, and the relationship between problematic media and education will be the core of this yapperoni pizza.

“The Slendermen Killings/Other Fiction Inspired Crimes” - The ACLU states that “There is no evidence that fiction has ever driven a sane person to violence.” Inspired crimes are indeed no less tragic, and thankfully rare, but people who suffer from inability to discern reality and fiction do not necessarily need fiction to commit violence. The “Son of Sam” murder spree was not inspired by a book or movie, but instead Berkowitz’ auditory hallucinations.

“Violent videogames DO cause violence” - After a great deal of funding and study, the American Psychological Association has concluded that teens and younger may have increased feelings of aggression and not necessarily physically violent outbursts as a direct effect, but older teens and young adults do not encounter statistically meaningful rates of aggression.

“Your brain can’t tell the difference between fiction and reality” - Factually incorrect. Children as young as 5 years old can tell the difference, and they can even be more suspicious about “facts” that come from sources they know also host fiction, such as TV shows.

“This stuff shouldn’t be online because it can be used to groom a child” - While I could not find specific statistics on how often pornography is used to desensitize child victims, nor how often that is specifically used in online grooming, and especially not how much of that pornography is made from fictional characters - out of a mixed group of convicted offenders with adult and child victims, 55% of offenders used pornography to manipulate their victim. I would never refute that explicit fanart or fanfic could be used to desensitize a child, but that is by far not the only tool (asking about sexual experiences/identity, making jokes, etc is extremely common grooming behavior), and there is no evidence to suggest that it is used to a statistically significant degree. In my own anecdotal experience, normal vanilla legal pornography is used with far greater prevalence, and there isn’t a similar movement to shame its production for that possibility. Nor should the creators of any material, pornographic or otherwise, share blame in the actions of a predator.

The Fiction Affects Reality Carrd

(No hate to the person who made it, in fact I give props to them for trying to find unbiased sources, I just want to point out that their interpretations of their articles are kinda flawed and one of their studies is a kind of a perfect example on small and culturally biased samples.)

Reading Fiction Impacts Aggressive Behavior - (I cannot access the full study but this article is the primary source used in the Carrd and it goes into detail) - A study showed that 67 university students were more annoyed with a loud buzzer after reading a short story about a physical fight between roommates compared to a story with nonviolent revenge. However, this study was conducted at Brigham Young University, the same campus where we got a whole video series of hot ethical takes like “I’d rather shoot a kitten than drink coffee,” so uh. Yeah. Kind of a prime example on why it’s important to have large and culturally varied sampling. (Another BYU study with 137 BYU students being odd about moral ambiguity in fiction, just because I’m starting to add Dr. Sarah M. Coyne to my list of “Sarah’s That I Dislike.”)

Your Brain on Fiction - a NYT article that describes Theory of the Mind and how fMRIs captured how readers’ minds would light up centers of muscle control when reading sentences like “Peter kicked.” The quote “The brain, it seems, does not make much of a distinction between reading about an experience and encountering it in real life; in each case, the same neurological regions are stimulated” is speaking of motor functions. Emotional centers of the brain were not included in the study.

How Fiction Changes Your World - a Boston Globe article that actually describes how people who read more fiction are more empathetic and tend to believe in a just world. It does not state that the empathy a reader feels for fictional characters extends to corrupting their moral compass. In fact, there’s such a thing as a “fictive license” to explore taboo themes more thoroughly because it is not real - 123 participants were interviewed after watching two actors play the part of detective and murderer being interviewed, and participants who were told it was fake had more varied and inquisitive responses.

The Social Impact of Books - Actually reuses the previous study about the just world, so point remains. Empathy is understanding, not mirroring.

Is Problematic Fiction Good for Survivors of Trauma?

It absolutely depends on the individual.

Writing expressively about traumatic experiences has been shown to be effective to reduce depression, or more effective in reducing dysphoria and anxiety than talking to fellow survivors, and Written Exposure Therapy is broadly prescribed to survivors of trauma, with one study centering on car crash survivors finding that WET resolved their PTSD symptoms and continued to be effective after a year.

In this study, which sadly is not available online but it is too important to leave out completely, survivors of CSA were given fictional novels about CSA and in closely reading and analyzing those stories, were able to understand their own experiences and were indeed drawn to write about their own experiences as well.

Engaging in problematic fiction, like all fiction, allows for consent as well as control. If at any point a survivor does not feel in control or wishes to stop, they can at that instant. They can even rewrite their narratives and take control of their story in fictionalizing and changing the account. They can even try to understand what their abuser felt through fiction, which is helpful considering that the vast majority of survivors had a relationship that had been positive and even loving with their abusers at times.

Is Problematic Fiction Good for Everyone Else?

It again depends on the individual.

Antis might be a little right that most people don't want to read problematic stories. In a study exploring whether fiction can corrode morals, 83% of study participants stated that they would prefer not to read a short story justifying baby murder if they had the choice, even if that exploration isn’t inherently harmful.

This very small sample study of 13 participants discussed how young women interpreted sexual themes in writing, including explicit fanfiction, and how that was beneficial and informative to explore sexual desire and examine healthy and unhealthy relationships in a safe and controlled environment.

This meta-analysis further discusses how problematic and sexual themes in YA literature are useful to illustrate what sexual violence looks like, and begin educational conversations through those depictions to break down harmful myths such as “if she didn’t scream, she wanted it.”

Empowered by the “Fictive License” previously cited, problematic fiction can be beneficial for anyone who desires and is capable of consuming and analyzing it.

This study analyzing abusive aspects of three films - Beauty and the Beast, Twilight, and 50 Shades of Gray - concluded that these abusive themes should be discussed to increase recognition and awareness, not censored based on those problematic themes.

This study of 53 women were asked to read different versions of fictional intimate partner violence flags, or “toxic behavior” like surveillance, control, etc. In every version of the story, whether the female or male had those behaviors either courting or committed, the women recognized the behavior as wrong.

Another study that reading allows for the moral laboratory to explore morality in fiction without decisive impact to corroding moral permissibility.

Is There Ever Any Point Where Fictional Interests Definitively Speak On Someone’s Morality?

In short - not really. Loving Jason Vorhees does not put you at risk of murdering campers as long as you know he’s not real. Writing Wincest does not mean you look forward to family reunions, as long as you know incest isn’t okay in the real world. The real world, where real people are harmed, is where you find the measure of someone’s character.

This Psychology Today article is the best source I could find for quotes from a fantastic book ‘Who's Been Sleeping in Your Head? The Secret World of Sexual Fantasies’ by Brett Kahr regarding taboo sexual fantasies and how they are not only common, but not inherently harmful.

There are people who enjoy problematic media in an entirely nonsexual sense, of course. I myself don’t get off on problematic media - I think it’s just interesting to explore different experiences, and I think that can be revolutionary.

Additionally, fantasies in general have almost always been in the vein of “things you don’t want to really happen in reality.” In a study of 351 asexuals, more than half reported that they fantasize about having sex, but that doesn’t mean that they actually want to. You can fantasize about dating Billie Eilish - it doesn’t mean that you’d be happy dealing with celebrity culture.

(I personally fantasize about the internet being just for adults, but in practice I think that would be incredibly harmful and isolating for at-risk youth and LGBTQ teens) Fantasies always pluck out only the bits of reality that you want to engage with.

If You Get Off On Fictional Kids, You’re Attracted to Something About Them Being Kids

Not inherently, surprisingly. Wearing a schoolgirl uniform is a pretty common roleplay, and it’s not meant to “fool” the participants into thinking they’re indulging in pedophilia. There’s a wealth of emotional and sexual nuance in that specific kink - innocence and virginity play, tilted power dynamics in ‘scolding’ the uniform wearer for dress code violations, even the concept of a sexually provocative “teenager” can be played with without shame, because the world of fetish and fantasy is separated from condonable actions for the vast, vast majority of adults. (The only study I could find on this is this small study of 100 white guys found on Facebook, which itself states it is not definitive, found that while there might be correlation between attraction to children and interest in schoolgirl uniforms, there is no proof of causation. AKA, the rectangular pedophile might indeed like square schoolgirl uniforms, but not everyone - in fact, the majority at nearly 60% in this very survey - that likes square schoolgirl uniforms is a rectangular pedophile.)

Even sexual age play between adults is not indicative of pedophilia because it exists in a setting between two adults who fully understand that the mechanics are completely fake, allowing the power dynamics that would be abusive between an adult and child to be ethically explored.

I don’t have an official-looking study to cite, but I have asked people who like content about underage fictional characters why they do so. Overwhelmingly, a lot of the ones who like underage age gaps like the fantasy of an older and more experienced character taking a younger one under their wing, to have the opportunity to commit violent and blatantly objectifying harm and yet try to create what inevitably does not truly pass as consent, but seems near enough to the characters. Some think that the characters themselves have an interesting chemistry. Some read underage fic and still imagine the characters as adults. Some like to explore the feelings of shame that the older character must feel and how they mentally compartmentalize to go forward with the relationship, and how the younger character found themself in that vulnerable position - which is exploring a harmful situation through fiction to understand how it could play out in real life.

People who like fictional incest like exploring the shameful components of that taboo relationship - and I have seen a lot of works that compare how bad incest could be to other harms, like the Gravecest route in a game with parental cannibalism. And then there are folks who like analyzing the codependency of having one person fulfill every social need - family, friend, lover, AKA Wincest.

What makes a predator if it’s not just sexual attraction?

90% of CSA survivors know their abuser, discrediting the still-entirely-too-popular Stranger Danger myth. And shockingly, only 50% of abusers are pedophiles.

That means 50% of child molesters do not have sexual interest in children because they are children, but they victimized children because they are more accessible in lieu of adult partners, with increased rates of incest.

While I could not find a specific study on the relation between dehumanization/objectification of child victims and child molesters (and if you find one, please send it to me!), this study speaks on dehumanization as a precursor to adult sexual violence.

This study, conducted on convicted child molesters in prison, showed that child molesters tend to fantasize about children while in a negative mood, further contributing to the theory that child victims are dehumanized prior to abuse.

This very small sample study found that in a mixed sample of internet only/contact crime/mixed offenders, offenders who had contact with children had lower rates of fantasizing about children.

In short, half the time a child predator is someone who wants to offend against a child regardless of attraction to the fact they are a child.

Resources To Recognize Grooming/Abuse Victims/Predators

I would absolutely be remiss to not share my collection of resources to help detect signs of abuse/grooming as well as warning signs of a predator who may be targeting elders/women/teens/children:

Darkness 2 Light is a fantastic resource overall, this page details stages and signs of grooming.

RAINN personally helped me through my PTSD journey, and this article detailing the signs of sexual trauma in teenagers is thorough and non-judgemental

Signs of abuse as well as warning signs of predation that does not use gendered language nor play into the Stranger Danger myth.

Education, not Censorship

I think a lot of the energy against taboo content among young people still has a lot to do with the desire to end rape culture. The tools that we Millennial Tumblrinas gave you Gen Z kids were snatches of leftist theory, deplatforming, and voting with your dollar, so it’s reasonable to think that removing taboo content like pedophilia, incest, rape fights rape culture.

It doesn’t.

Rape culture is fought by education. Comprehensive sex education, education about consent. Talking about what consent looks like, what sex can look like, what rape can look like.

There should be more taboo content to talk about these things, to show all the shades it can look like. From a violent noncon to fics that aren’t even tagged as dubcon yet still are in shades that are hard to suss out, we should talk about it.

A Non-Empirical Example Of Good Media Analysis and Education to Combat Rape Culture

Let’s use the example of Daemon and Rhaenyra Targaryen’s relationship in House of the Dragon. Canonically, in both the book and the show, they have a romantic relationship that appears for the most part to be positive (the show being more contentious but I dedicated an aside to Sarah Hess and our beef at the bottom of my Carrd, but feel free to ask how I feel about writing producers with any variation of the name ‘Sarah’) despite an age gap, a sexual relationship that began while Rhaenyra was a minor, and incest - the problematic hat trick if you will.

I have seen anti-Daemyra shippers condemn Daemyra shippers for “Condoning grooming, age gaps, pedophilia, and incest.” Which is not just a broad, inaccurate, and harmful statement, it’s not at all constructive or educational analysis.

It would actually be beneficial to say “Daemon is grooming Rhaenyra as a teenager with gifts, devoted attention that takes advantage of her isolation and vulnerability, frequent nonsexual touches, the extreme desensitization to sexuality in the brothel visit,” etc etc. And even so, it is not useful to say that people cannot still ship the relationship and acknowledge those aspects. They might want to further explore the issues of consent in their dynamic in fiction, they may want to strip away some of them with narrative reimagining. Some might want to ignore the taboos completely and indulge in the fantasy entirely, and some might find the actors hot as hell - AKA, anyone who watches the show.

It’s honestly a little similar to me in how Jerry Falwell would tell his followers not to watch or read or take in any media that dealt with homosexuality unless it was condemning it - even Will & Grace was on Jerry’s shitlist. And so, Jerry’s followers missed out on a lot of media that could have educated them about queerness, could have humanized queer people for them - and that did not make queers go away. Just like ignoring or shutting out media about incest, rape, and other forms of sexual violence doesn’t make those things go away - it just tends to make you less informed, and little less capable of empathy towards people affected by those subjects.

So let’s stop shaming those that ship a complicated dynamic - you get less fanworks exploring those taboos, and less of a discussion overall. You shut down the morality lab of fiction, and to be honest, it’s wet sock behavior.

Some FanFiction Specific Studies

How dubcon fanfiction can flesh out the intricacies and messiness of realistic consent

A review of darkfic written about Harry Potter in 2005 (which, I will personally attest has never been outdone in how profoundly taboo those works were)

Interviews with 11 Self Insert writers who wrote on themes of rape, abuse, control, yandere, etc, and how that was beneficial to some who had experienced sexual violence themselves

Conclusion:

H…holy shit, you actually read all of that?? Congrats dude! That is a lot of time and brain power to dedicate to any one thing!

By the way, I am not really gifted at writing articles or any of that junk, and I tried to make my hyperlexic ass a little more accessible instead of bringing out all the $5 words. I am literally just an autistic who took a couple technical writing classes over a decade ago and really wanted to sort out my thoughts and try to have a platform for discussion. Also, I am really fucking bad at math. I failed two different college level statistics classes twice each. Gun to my head, I could not tell you what a standard deviation is, which is why I worked entirely with the percentages.

And I do want to have a discussion! I would in fact like to not report anyone for sending me gore or death threats or any of that stuff! I don’t think everyone will agree with me, in fact I’m certain that you could find studies that contradict some of mine, and I’d love to discuss them!

I’m sure it will still be tempting to throw around accusations of pedophilia because sometimes, confronting your previously held beliefs is incredibly uncomfortable. If you could not do that, that would be great? I don’t like being compared to someone who profoundly abused me just because I have a different opinion on how to combat rape culture and empower survivors. If you can do that, I’ll do my absolute best to be cheerful and welcoming and respectful as well. 😁

PS - I’m also not really going to be phased if you call me weird or cringe - I am. Always have been. Cringe, weirdness, and autism have made me do and capable of doing some fantastically neat and impressive stuff. But if you try to say something like “proshippers are too yucky and weird to be in fandom” - I’m going to have to refer you to your similarity to Kate Sanders of Lizzy McGuire fame, you “prEpz >:(“ - [My Immortal, legendary author unknown]

[aropride]

went thru some of my followers list. stuff ive blocked people for today:

being a tcc blog (didnt even know those guys still existed)

being a bot x2497478546937572

having a blank blog x9

being a proana blog (at least keep it out of my notifs oh my god)

having an unneccarily rude pinned post

being an incest blog

being a 13 year old

being a 14 year old x3

using the word degenerate x2

running a porn blog that was giving me bot vibes (i feel like a lot of heterosexual porn blogs have bot vibes are they bots or do y'all really live like that?? no tags no text just one stolen picture after another of hairless skinny white women with big boobs?)

child abuse joke

had 14 year old vibes x4

no pronouns in bio but in a way that gave me bad vibes x3

proshipping x3 (do you people not read pinned posts or do u just not care)

hasnt posted since 2016 x7

nonpsychotic person calling themself a psycho

harry potter fan ("anti jkr" THEN ACT LIKE IT)

completely untagged rape porn first thing on their blog

obviously transphobic "trans inclusive radical feminist" (red url and all, get fucked)

self proclaimed "yandere"

disagreed with the first post on their blog

header image was gore!

stuff i appreciated while doing this

person who pinned a picture of their dog

"not a bot just lazy" headers (ty for saving me time)

guy with awesome pronouns

fellow covid cautious warrior

the amount of fellow aro and disabled people

reasons i gave up on this endeavor:

got too annoyed

firefox was starting to lag and i followed and unfollowed the same person like four times in a row by accident (SORRY) so i figured it was time to call it quits

day my exam is due:

monday

progress ive made on this exam:

none

[rashoumon-homo]

Rant ahead, prolly gonna delete later

TW: gender dysphoria, fetishization of trans men in fanfiction

Idk if it’s just me but I’m a trans guy who typically won’t touch “trans male [character]” smut fics with a ten foot pole. I’ve found a handful that are respectfully written, but for the most part they make me feel so fucking uncomfortable. It’s like the (non-trans) writers don’t see trans men as real men. There’s frequent untagged feminization, excessively feminine terms, and an alarming number of pregnancy fics. I get that some people like these things, and I respect that, but that’s pretty much ALL that’s out there. It’s like they want to write for a m/m ship but only want to write m/f smut, so they slap “trans” on there. It’s so blatantly obvious that the majority of these writers have never done a drop of research on what it means to be trans masc, much less MET a trans masc person irl.

Not only that, complaining about it makes YOU the bad guy. I made a post on the AO3 subreddit back when I first joined it (aka before I knew better) just kind of venting about the way trans characters are written in fics. I was a lot more gentle and understanding about it than I’m being here btw. And instantly the post got flooded with comments saying that “just because you don’t like it doesn’t mean other people don’t.” Or “my roommate’s boyfriend’s brother is trans and he doesn’t care about that stuff.” Or that people are free to write whatever they want and if I don’t like it I shouldn’t be reading it. (My favorite one was “I’m cis but I don’t see an issue”) I ended up deleting the post.

Back in February there was this fic I read that did all that same shit and it pissed me off. Untagged feminization, afab language, the whole shebang. And I KNOW that author wouldn’t have treated the character that way if they were writing a cis man. For legal reasons, this comment was not written by me, but it was deleted by the author right away with no response.

I blocked them and moved on.

I guess what brought all these emotions back was a post I saw where someone was complaining about other cultures being written in an accidentally offensive way in fics. The same people who tore down my post (and others like it) were suddenly all into the idea of respecting the cultures you write, doing research on them, etc. How is trans culture any different? Why is it “um actually some trans guys like being feminized” but then “these cultural stereotypes are offensive and the author should do better?”

Not too long ago, I decided to start writing trans characters in fics. It was really tough for me, since I had to battle a lot of my own dysphoria, but I felt like it was worth it if it meant there was just one more fic out there to make trans people feel seen and respected. Being seen as a real man and being trans should not be mutually exclusive. It’s possible to be both. And it’s painfully obvious when the writer doesn’t see it like that.

If you’re trans and you feel the same way about all this, lmk. Sometimes I feel like I really am the unreasonable one and that I’m all alone here and it really fucks with my head.

And if you’re cis and wanting to write trans characters, I implore you to learn about us first. Trans people are not a shortcut to writing m/f smut. They have their own unique experience of the world that needs to be taken into account if you’re going to write them respectfully. Listen to trans voices. Please.

[crow-talks-hockey]

ok but fr SO many of you guys that hate the oilers need to fucking stop actually TAGGING THE EDMONTON OILERS OR OILERS LB TAG when you're hating. like you can say whatever you want about them but leave their fucking tags out of it please. adding tags here is in no way close on here to what it is across other social medias. tags here are for the fandom, not for general information or algorithm. not one single person who would kill for these boys wants to see you actively going against them. same goes with players. don't tag connor if all you're going to fucking do is call out how much you despise him. don't tag the oilers if all you want to yap about is how pLaInLy HoRrIbLe it would be for them to bring the cup back to canada because GUESS FUCKING WHAT? WE want that. leave us alone, we are literally begging you.

(i would also like to point out that i myself have made this mistake before. i literally tagged the bruins in a hate post all of once when i first joined this site before realizing "oh shit tumblr isn't like that i'm so sorry" and removing their tag from the post. i haven't don't that since. if you find my untagged hating drifting about, then it's whatever. but not tagging seriously helps people be able filter stuff out. fans of the team can't exactly block their own tag when they see people invading it with hate. so. yknow. please stop and let us live in peace lol)

[hockeychatstea]

K, so some burning thoughts on Daniella & Vince

1. All their fights have to be about Instagram. The whole nuts emoji was done retroactivelyon a post that was posted WAY BEFORE they got together and stans started hate following her. Fight- you never comment on my posts. Proceeds to comment on a post before they got together that very few people who gossip about him ignoring her will go back to look at. Fight - you don’t post me. Posts video of her ambling down the beach like a drunk person wearing a hat and sunglasses. He seems to want to humiliate her.

2. She’s pitched him on being a social media manager — maybe even creating his personal TikTok. The fan insta account was definitely her. (Though, any thoughts about how some of the captions sounded like they were written by someone who spoke ESL — like calling her posts of events “registrations” and other weird wording?) The new Tumblr is her. She tags clothing brands in hers and he’s started doing it in reverse on old posts. Her content is boring af and she’s edited beyond recognition. (Literally don’t know how she hasn’t untagged herself on those hair salon pics. She’s very cute, but not this itty bitty nosed, high cheekbones gal on her insta.) She’s young, and Instagram creates dysmorphia, so I feel bad for her here. She’s not below him or any crap that tries to put her looks down. I am not bashing her actual looks. Fellow strong nose, baby faced woman myself. Just over the top editing. Anytime she posts, I think of that beyonce song “to the left, to the left”, like look at the camera and just be yourself! She has friends with decent followings, who do blogs, but she just has no self-identity and personality besides drinking, eating out, being a pro gf and taking photos for the gram. I also think she just doesn’t get why her followers don’t keep going up.

3. She doesn’t want to work, and never planned to. I don’t know if her mom did the same thing, and whether she worked before marrying rich and if this is just the family way, or what. She will keep trying to do some influencer/social media to pretend she has a “job”. Check out her old influencer profile trying to get brands to hire her taking about her skills in editing. lol.

4. The video from his interior designer says it all to me on how much he thinks of her. She mentions that he wants to entertain, have a game room, pretty much that’s it. The designer specially calls out that bathroom goes relatively untouched, no mention of closet overhauls. Two things any live-in girlfriend would definitely would have wanted to have done — room to get ready/a nice vanity and custom closets for girl stuff. The bathroom they showed was dark and would be awful to do makeup in. He updated his bachelor pad for single guy stuff. Period.

He also seems genuinely terrible, and I am not into him like when TikTok pretty much forced me to think he’s hot. But this is a train wreck and I just can’t look away for some reason. Vapid attracts vapid, so maybe they are perfect for one another.

I agree with you anon their relationship is just so fucking weird to me 💀

[killian-whump]

Sorry to ask, but who’s this Rothberg guy? It’s been a while since I last checked up on Once or Colin stuff since the show ended.

Oh boy, Nonny. Have I got a tale for you...

Okay, so during the recent pandemic, a lot of folks started doing podcasts and interviews on Zoom and stuff like that. During this time, it was announced that Colin was going to be hosting a podcast with Jason Rothberg and Rose Ganguzza, where they interview musicians and people who work in the music/film industries. There were tentative plans to one day turn it into a Space Ghost style animated TV show.

Then the N/F/Ts started. They were animated tokens, using Colin's voice and likeness, sold for cryptocurrency. Rothberg was pushing them pretty heavily, using all the usual crypto bro sales tactics and "fireside chats" to do so - and also doing so through Colin. There were posts on his social media (obviously written by someone else, but presumably approved and posted by Colin) acting like NFTs are great and encouraging people to join Rothberg's fireside chats about them.

Needless to say, his fandom didn't like this. That's putting it mildly, actually. Most of them hated it. Some quietly ignored the whole thing, some spoke out pretty angrily, some just flat out left the fandom altogether. All but a few were deeply disappointed.

Colin tried to fix whatever he could, but it was largely too late since the project (and the N/F/Ts) was already underway and he was likely contractually obligated to continue with it. Still, he made an obvious effort. He stopped reposting Rothberg's spammy used car salesman posts. He made sure the N/F/Ts were responsibly minted to mitigate environmental concerns surrounding them. He addressed the concerns in an animated video that was intended to educate and inform those who didn't know anything about N/F/Ts, but also acknowledged and validated the concerns some fans were voicing about them.

But it wasn't anywhere near enough to stop the train wreck of those N/F/Ts. It turned out there wasn't a handful of them, but thousands of them made - and they weren't being sold for $10 a pop, but $180 at the lowest tier and $23,000+ at the highest. It was sheer insanity, and predictably, the release was a complete disaster. They sold, like, 10 of them.

Throughout the course of this debacle, some of Colin's fans were very, very vocal about how much they disapproved of this project, how much they hated N/F/Ts in general, etc. etc. I was one of them. Rothberg never confronted any of us; he just ignored us or made snarky comments about haters that we ignored.

Then Pip (@pirateherokillian) said something critical about it. She wasn't even being loud or obnoxious or extra vocal. She was just chatting in untagged tweets with her friends about her concerns with the project. Now, Pip's social media is more personal in nature than, say, mine is. She posts about her life and topics other than Colin. And something in her posts made Rothberg decide that she was vulnerable and he attacked her. He said she only disliked the N/F/Ts because she was too poor to afford one and implied that there was something wrong with her mental health.

And the fandom collectively lost its shit. Because for starters, Pip is one of us - and we don't take kindly to bullying in this fandom. But also, the things Rothberg said were ableist and specifically targeted to hit her where he felt she was most vulnerable. And the man is a fucking coward. He didn't say BOO to those who were loudly and vehemently criticizing the project for months, but he attacked Pip the moment she opened her mouth, simply because he thought he could get away with it.

Well, he couldn't. We kicked up a stir, and next thing we knew, he was apologizing (albeit an obviously forced and insincere one) and sulkily saying he was no longer "allowed" to interact with Colin's fans.

Gee, I wonder who told him that...? ❤���

Anyway, he's mostly left us alone since then - but the damage has been done. As a fandom, we collectively hate this guy. We feel like he suckered Colin into the TSR project with the intent to use his likeness and name to gain attention for the project, and with the plan to tap into Colin's fandom's pocketbooks to sell us N/F/Ts and empty promises. We think he's a predatory, insincere, and opportunistic scam artist and all-around douchebag. And seeing as he's abused us individually and collectively, none of us have any respect for him - and we're not going to "play nice" and sugar coat our thoughts on the topic.

Unfortunately, Colin's still working with him on the TSR project. Whether that's because he wants to or because he's contractually obligated to do so, we don't know - but we all have our guesses. Regardless, most of us ignore this project of Colin's, due to our hatred of Rothberg, and Colin often doesn't post about or promote the project, likely because he knows how we all feel about it.

[sister-lucifer]

I guess I'm not as involved in the fandom as I thought I was because I have NO CLUE who that call-out post is about!

i’m assuming you’re referring this post, which i wouldn’t really consider a call out as much as a complaint but it’s referring to the creator of blessed be the wicked. i believe they’re referring to this post in the og post. while i agree with some stuff he said about offenderman and all that, the beginning was just so rude and unnecessarily self righteous, it was weird. he basically says most of the fandom is too dumb to make anything worthwhile which….ouch??

i mostly reblogged it for the cryptids’ addition bc i have a whole thing about untagged content. this post specifically (WHICH HAS A DRAWING OF AND TEXT DESCRIPTION OF GORE AND VIOLENCE) was left completely untagged which is just. so fucking gross and irresponsible. it makes the filtering system completely useless and leaves it to be seen by literally anyone just scrolling the creepypasta tag or someone who’s following someone who reblogs it or anyone who sees it because it pops up as a “based on your likes!” etc etc

this isn’t like a “I WANT THIS GUY DEAD” call out or anything i just think it’s really irresponsible, that’s all. i suggested a community label for it so hopefully nobody who could be distressed by that content will have to see it

also don’t harass this guy he apologized and if you do you’re stupid and stinky and dumb thank you

[absolutebitchgetter]

The problems of CS. Combined in one.

Since the CS ninjas are onto me, i shant give up. You will forever hear the tunes of the rumours of ABG'S unbanning.

Heres all the CS posts i can find:

All of this might share the same topic, and thats a feature of how Comic Studio doesnt - or probably will never - fix its problems. Insane. I know. However, why am i not giving up if we cant fix it?

To save people's sanity.

Im trying to get unbanned so i can prove i am trying to become a better person, and save people's mental health by pointing out thr flaws in:

-moderation

-people

-studios

-controversy

-kids

Its honestly pretty scary how kids are exposed to Jayst- i mean the toxicity of comic studio, and also how the experienced CS users are saying its worse than fucking Twitter.

Where can i begin with the fucking moderation? Where were they when i was getting banned? One is treated like an angel after the fucking outrageous calls he does. How long was i banned? 8 months? Yes. 8 Fucking Months. Above Half a year. One has literally made DOXXING JOKES TO ME and made me fear for my life. One in the cs discord takes someone elses side when i ask for a spoiler for Binding of Isaac (a pretty scary game). One is just fucking horrible at moderation. And one is probably biased after i did a few too many pings in a server. A server i owned btw, no one stopped me. You know who you are. :)

To name a few very shit studios,

-Probably fucking most of them

Probably 10% of the studios get used.

And a lot of them are just fucking shit.

We have a fucking NICK JR studio for like 2 YEAR OLDS.

When is there a fucking Despicable Me comic studio?

To name types of people:

Suspected pedophiles

probably pedophiles

pedophiles

nazis

racists

homophobes

transphobes

xenophobes

sexists

anti semetic

Jokes aside tho there are lot of people i named that are actually one of the things above. There are also lots of fucking toxic people.

To my next point

popular beats all apparently

If your popular, dont fear of being banned! You fucking wont be!

I can name, a shit ton of people that should be banned but wouldnt because they have a shit ton of followers and that would get a lot of people to quit the site.

-Puffyy (Should i say more?)

-Jaystar (☠️)

-Onion_Rabbit (Threw about users like hell, faked harassment, legit got people to witchhunt me (December 2022), was toxic to me before i got banned (unfairly) (July 2023)

-Deathzy (A fucking mpreg and sex comic untagged, did the same as Onion_Rabbit July 2023, has known cases of being cocky as fuck when they get their way)

-SarahKomik (Has threw about users under the bus pretending to victimise themselves over the slightest of out of context things. The current situation with Oka is one.)

-Zappy (The same as above.)

Theres a lot more! Holy fuck

This community has a complete fucking hivemind too.

When popular users say "this person has done something bad (slightly or horrible) target them guys" and when they say "dont harass this person pls" they're praying that the mods dont fucking mob them. Oh wait.

Its like a lot of people have pointed out popular beats all!

Also, this is how people say "fuck the rules" (e.g, Oka and me)

If you have any problems, comment it, You probably shouldnt have but if your a snowflake, combat me.

Oh yeah i also forgot Tammy got knocked about like the school thot at summer time with the football team. They need apologising yall. This is the reason why people quit, my point above. Tammy quitting is one of the worst things to happen to CS.

[i-can-even-burn-salad]

Elli's Scribblings

Welcome!

This is my cozy little corner of this hellsite. Make yourself at home, have a look around, ignore the blood, that’s just... uh, anyway. Here you’ll find posts with a focus on writing dark stories with a happy end, but this is a main blog, so there will be a sprinkle of memes, queer stuff and everything else I feel like putting here.

An overview of my writing is below the cut, more about me and my tags can be found on my about page.

My website where you can find most of my novels in free ebook/pdf format My ko-fi where you can support me if you like what you read

@elli-scribbles​ - all my original writing that was posted here @iridium-quality-salad - my video game side blog @cant-burn-the-ice-cream​ - random stuff (untagged; mostly cute things and memes that have no image descriptions)

About Me

Adult, at least on paper.

I curse quite a lot. Sorry (but not really).

I like tag games, but I have the attention span of a common house fly. Also sor— oh look a butterfly.

I run a queue, but I’m not tagging it.

Stuck between being a whump blog and a writing blog.

Fantasy books and video games are everything.

I will not reblog posts where important information isn't accessible, i.e. undescribed images or weird/small/colorful fonts.

English is not my first language.

My Stories

📖 General

Despite the focus on horrible things, my endings are too happy for dark fantasy, and despite the focus on relationships, I'm too ace for mainstream romance. All stories below are set in the same universe, can be read standalone*, have a happy end, and are listed in chronological order. My personal preferred reading order for the loosely connected ones is Undeserved > Glass Shards > Second Chances > Fancy Boots > Nuisance > Sweet Little Lies. *Undeserved does not have a satisfying ending, that's what Glass Shards is for.

🌿 Thorns and Jasmine

Synopsis: Healer Caldyn gets kidnapped and tortured by bad guys who want to claim his soul, and with it his unique magic. By the time he is saved, it is almost too late. Length: 150k words / finished Vibes: non-human / captivity, torture and recovery / old and new trauma / mostly whump Links: Masterlist

🌺 Twisted Thorns

Synopsis: Blinded and traumatized, Caldyn leaves his home, hoping the distance will allow him to regain control over his magic. But no matter how far he goes, he cannot outrun his past. Length: 98k / finished (eternally editing) Vibes: blind main char pov / dark magic / humans are the weird ones Links: WIP Intro

🪙 Nuisance

Synopsis: When Merridy is saved by the city’s most infamous criminal, she’s sure her life is over. Meanwhile, Cedric just wants to have his peace back. Length: 48k words / finished Vibes: reluctant caretaker / misunderstandings / gay husbands / found family Links: WIP Intro | Masterlist | Ebook

🍬 Sweet Little Lies

Synopsis: When Laurent hides from the guards in a candy store, he falls in love with the owner. Despite his dislike for candy, he can't stay away. Length: 37k words / finished Vibes: blind main char pov / colorful glass jars / bloody handprints / dancing slowly at a grand ball Links: WIP Intro | Ebook

☕ Second Chances

Synopsis: Valadan finds the love of his life, almost gets her killed, and then spends a summer making dick jokes instead of admitting his feelings. Length: 46k words / finished Vibes: annoyances to friends to lovers / sword training (flirting) / lots of angst / perfect coffee Links: Masterlist | Ebook

⛓️ Undeserved

Synopsis: Trying to assassinate an ambassador, Damien gets caught and is made to pay for his crimes. The story of how he fucked up his life, told in three different timelines. Length: 47k words / finished Vibes: all hurt no comfort / dungeons ❤ / from bad to worse / shattered glass Links: Masterlist | Ebook

💜 Glass Shards

Synopsis: Merridy saves Damien from certain death. Leaving her life of thievery behind to make sure he recovers might turn out to be the best thing that ever happened to her. Length: 135k + words / finished Vibes: hurt/comfort / please don’t leave / quiet inn rooms / qpr ace love story Links: WIP Intro | Masterlist

👢 Fancy Boots

Synopsis: A familiar face shows up, disturbs Merry’s and Damien’s peaceful life, invites himself to dinner, and refuses to leave. Length: 46k words / finished Vibes: enemies to friends, kinda / trauma / found family / homemade food Links: Masterlist | Ebook (part of Undeserved*) *Glass Shards is set in between Undeserved and Fancy Boots, but I decided to release them together due to recurring themes and characters.

🔔 Till Death

Synopsis: When wandering healer Finnian loses a patient, he is attacked and left for dead in the forest. Hermit Eilis finds him and nurses him back to health. Length: 110k words / finished Vibes: falling leaves / so much torture / unreliable magic / self-sacrifice Links: WIP Intro | Ebook

🍰 All of our Lives

Synopsis: When her childhood friend Ross finds Irina trapped in an abandoned prison, she's more dead than alive, deeply traumatized — and seeking revenge for years of abuse. Length: 120k words / editing Vibes: chosen family / a cold, dark dungeon / revenge / disabled caretaker Links: WIP Intro

🌈 Other Stories

Everything else that doesn’t fit one of the main story arcs, like background stories of side characters. Gwyneth: Hold On | Rescued The story of how Gwyneth met Raindrop The Rose A short fairy tale based on Beauty and the Beast April 1st I'm so sorry if you see what I did here

If you've made it to the end - have a cookie 🍪

And if you are concerned about content warnings, this post contains extremely detailed (and extremely spoilery) content warnings for all stories, going into more detail than the masterlist or above-chapter summaries.

[sapphire-weapon]

you've been in resi fandom for such a long time right? then how do you feel about it as a whole if you don't mind me asking? is it better to just stay in your own safe space with people that share the same opinion as you to further avoid unnecessary drama like I've noticed that likes to break out from time to time? even though it's like this in probably almost every other space there is 😐

i know i'm going to get shit for this answer but

i regard the RE fandom with the same kind of baffled contempt that xenosys vex has for the FFXIV community. but instead of being hypocritical about cosmetic mods vs gameplay mods, they're hypocritical in their elitism. they'll jump down my throat for not accepting every reading of the canon/characters as valid and then turn around and dox a minor for not having the same opinions on ships as them.

i DO keep to myself. i never message anybody or send anyone asks or respond to their posts or reblog their posts with commentary. i don't even follow back the people who follow me. i stay the fuck here, in this sandbox, and keep 90% of my posts untagged so that people can't find me, either. and i STILL get hammered with hate and salt and bullshit from people who have found my shit somehow and made themselves mad over it.

the RE fandom is the fucking worst.

people from your own ship community will turn on you and dogpile you for not shipping the ship the same way that they do. i've been disowned from a huge chunk of the eagleone fandom -- to the point where they refuse to use the eagleone ship name anymore and ban anyone from the discord server who associates with me -- despite me being the sole person out here trying to prove that eagleone is canon -- because i *checks notes*

didn't like a list of prompts for a ship week or the ship name they were using and then refused to make a public apology for it. also i don't read fanfiction.

they sent me over 50 hate anons in 24 hours. and they still stalk me and try to bait me into shit. and then they have the gall to complain about aeon fandom bullying them, when they do the same shit to one of their own.

people will yell at me for "policing how other people ship" because i reject the "siblings" discourse, while obsessively stalking my blog and trying to police how i talk on it.

you guys should fucking SEE the bullshit that gets dropped into my inbox on a regular basis. and i'm a fucking nobody. i couldn't imagine what it'd be like to actually be, like, a known figure in the fandom.

and away from ships, you've got assholes spreading misinformation, KNOWING that it's misleading/inaccurate, and doing it anyway because they've convinced themselves it's a net good for the fandom. i got into it with a mafia background truther on twitter once who admitted "yeah a lot of this stuff is contradicted by the game" but insisted on spreading the bullshit anyway because "people want to know this stuff," completely missing the point of "you're misleading them because they don't know any better."

look at leon's wiki, for fuck's sake. it's filled to bursting with shit that just flat-out isn't true, but it's closed to editing by the public because the elitist fucks who run the wiki got so high sniffing their own farts that they don't want to be told they're wrong.

so in the words of xeno:

"that's your fault, if you give a shit about the [RE fandom]. the [RE fandom] are fucking shitheads. they're assholes. they're fucking dumb as fuck. why the fuck do you give a shit about what the [RE fandom] thinks? i don't understand. like, dude, the [RE fandom] is the last fucking [fandom] you want to listen to."

[quietsingingonadarkbus]

Screw it im making the su post (untagged because I’m not getting into that mess, if you don’t wanna see this stop reading now)

I haven’t watched the show in many years so like take everything I say with a grain of salt, but I’d heard the “space fascists” and “I think we have to kill this guy Steven” kinda criticism a lot before I watched it and it definitely surprised me. I honestly didn’t pick up any of that from the show, and I think the reason is because the show is not actually about Fascism or Murder or even systemic problems in general, it’s about interpersonal harm and it just uses systemic problems as an allegory. Now I’m only talking about the stuff with the diamonds here, there is plenty of commentary on real world systemic issues, but I don’t think the oppressive society of homeworld was intended to be that on any level beyond “persecuting people by putting them into Classes and dehumanizing them is bad” which it is not the first or only media, even children’s media, to say. The diamonds are not ultra efficient dictators with the motives or logic of real fascists, they’re a fucked up family who accidentally made their robots sentient and had a trans kid and have to deal with the consequences. Again, if I rewatched the show I could probably get a better analysis going but the important thing is they are very much not Forgiven at the end; all that happens is that they are convinced to Stop Killing the Protagonists and then do work to undo their fucked up society mostly offscreen. Steven doesn’t like violence because hurting people makes him feel bad, which is fair and true! I think some people don’t understand why anyone would feel bad about hurting someone who’s clearly a Bad Person, but that’s not how it always works in real life. And yeah, it’s a messy show with messy writing and inconsistent metaphors, but I find it really silly to pretend that anyone could actually watch this show and think it’s encouraging genocide. I know this discourse is so beyond irrelevant these days but it just kinda frustrates me because it just makes me feel like I watched the show wrong somehow all those years ago.

[lowhowl]

♥☠ i love da salt

♥ What's the WORST thing that has happened to you rp wise?

MAN IDK, I don't really carry that kind of stuff with me. all of my biggest grievances that involved this rpc were like... interpersonal issues between muns, had nothin to do with writing. I'll keep it simple and say that I was around when a very very major callout for the Sonic RPC happened, was personally friends with the guy who got exposed, and it just entirely shot my interest in writing here until recently.

☠ What does someone have to do for an instant unfollow from you?

consistently posting untagged smut on main. like- if you fuck up, a post goes to the wrong blog- I get it. it happens, it's okay. But if you're intentionally posting your smut alongside your sfw untagged then I'm just not gonna follow you. I have a totally separate account and dash for that kind of stuff, most of the ppl here have separate sideblogs- i personally think it should be the standard to entirely split 18+ content from your normal content, even if it's tagged. Tagging it is on thin ice.

[abyssaltransitsystem-cct]

Boundaries

I don't want to do any kinda syscourse. And I'd really appreciate if you guys don't get weird about my being a cis man alter in a transmasc systems body.

Please... don't act like this is fanfic or fanworks to consume. I want to post this stuff because I want to reach out to others who are going through things like this.

There will be sexual content. No minors, please.

Likely Content Warnings. Probably will be untagged unless I want to share it. Sorry

Dissociation and Memory Loss

Past Disordered Eating

Current healthy Weight Gain

Alcoholism

Ableism

Dysphoria (Species + Sex)

Male Pregnancy as a serious SFW and NSFW topic.

Monster Fucking (... Things happened with the Demon. It was consensual for sure but not safe or sane.)

Serious SFW and NSFW discussion of Daddy Kink, PetPlay, BDSM, etc. as our kinks are part of how we conceptualize ourself as a person.

Be respectful. We block bigots on sight.

Some tags I'll use for sharing things:

#diary comic

#source memory

#introject

#fictive

#system diary

And occasionally, tags for my source. I am aware my source memories are not actually canon to the fictional work of Dungeon Meshi.

[unsafe-chikku]

I have sort of mixed feelings on the whole “brony” thing bc I was deep in the paint of all that (pre-egg-crack tho so a slightly different perspective) from 2012-2016 ish)

I think it’s extremely important to note I don’t like the term or the origins of it all now, and if I met someone today who still used the label I’d keep a close eye on them bc many who do are in the 4chan bigot crowd.

However, It is interesting to dissect my experience a bit with this weirdness though.

But even way back then when I’d get defensive of “fellow bronies” 😒 I had to always admit that many sucked ass.

Since it had origins in 4chan lots of ppl who were in it were just absolute bigots and the worst ppl you can meet. I knew that in 2012 and I know it even better now.

The high defensiveness of their masculinity bc of enjoyment of a little girl demographic show lead to a lot of the worst behavior I’ve ever seen in a fan space. I think this also explains the abnormal hyper sexuality they inserted into the space.

Sure, R34 is a thing and I honestly really don’t care what ppl are making/into as long as it’s tagged properly away from kids/ppl who don’t wanna see it. It’s usually drawings/fics/ect made by a guy with max ten to fifty followers, who give a shit. Pointing it out gives more attention to it and makes more of it appear in my experience.

But the sheer volumes made and extreme lack of self awareness or in some cases just irrational vitriol about properly tagging nsfw shit…well there’s a reason the sane members scrambled to do Safe Search Roundups once a month to eliminate as much fetish/nsfw content as they could from Google safe search.

My mixed part of the feelings is that me and many others involved in all that became leftists and realized we were queer.

Bc having an online community where the common theme is “I am not being a Man in the correct way and it makes me very cool” is atttactive to ppl who are either “men” (nope!) or ppl who secretly/unknowingly want to be men but not like the cishet assholes in their lives, or just ppl who felt weird about cishet gender and sexuality in general.

(if you asked 2013 me if I was trans, I would have 100% believed when I told u I was a cisgender girl if I even knew that term then. Likely not lol.)

And I had a lot of great experiences with ppl in the community too. It legitimately helped me get out of the culty evangelical mindset I had been born and brainwashed into.

I even had a group I met with irl in college and no one there was more weird than me as ppl going to a private conservative Christian school afaik.

(One guy went on to go somewhat viral for making a really convincing Rayman smash leak years ago lol.)

Anyways, I just wish it hadn’t been through something that started on 4chan and was called “brony” (inherently alienating and sexist bc the idea is to pull away from the feminine while also co-opting it) and had a lot of pure bastard folks at the Peak of it (late season 1 through season 3).

I don’t even mean the nsfw stuff (though again that was abnormally rampant) since that exists for everything- I mean just honest to god so many bronies were just fucking bigoted assholes who considered it their god given right to post untagged porn and say racist shit and be sexist as hell.

However imo “brony” really became a huge misnomer after the Princessification of Twilight. A huge chunk of the original 4chan weirdo crowd fucked off, and even more after Equestria Girls, and it kept bleeding after that as more sane, queer and chill fans became more active.

This allowed the sane, queer, and chill fans to thrive in a smaller community with less scrutiny on them from outside and fewer loud assholes flaming their flutterdash fics.

It really was just “mlp fans” by season 6 or 7 but the original name was stuck for a while after that sadly.

At this point, those remaining mostly recognized the show for what it was-a well made show about tiny horses made to sell plastic horses to kids, especially little girls, and engaged with it that way.

It was actually fairly fun especially by 2016. I lost interest in late 2017 but the fond memories I have are mostly that era.

I’m so glad that the brony label is dead and mlp is back in the hands of sane, chill, and queer creators and fans.

[kirexa]

* Viper related reasons

(^THANKS FOR THIS @runetallem LOL)

Kiri is NOT a funky little guy in post limit :3

^not entirely accurate bcuz I forget sometimes lol

Notes goal post

PFP is a: Brazilian rainbow boa!

Kiri interests 🤩🤩

• Twisted Wonderland

• Your Turn To Die

• Project Sekai

• SNAKES (hyperfixation)

• Mystic Messenger

• Persona Five

• Hazbin (🏴‍☠️)

I also have @identifying-snakes-in-posts !!!!!! I'll try 2 be active there :3

DO NOT FOLLOW IF SNAKES TRIGGER YOU!!! I POST UNTAGGED SNAKES N SHIT. SORRY.

Adding this above the readmore because I love attention: PLEASE TAG ME IN ANYTHING YOU THINK I WOULD LIKE I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER. SNAKES. 2ND YEARS. ANY TWST THING. ANY YTTD THING. ANYTHING.

^ Note that you can tag me in tag games but I don't usually get to them, sorry!

He/They/She or whatever idrc

Kirexa/Roma/whatever as long as it's clear you mean me

Autism + ADHD diagnosed but it always feels like I'm faking UHM also questioning cluster B (too scaredsies to genuinely label myself so it's gonna stay questioning 👍) + probably c-ptsd

If you want to be moots talk to me!!! I prommy I don't bite 🫶🫶

I AM A MINOR. I don't care if adults follow me, but do NOT follow me if you post only 18+ content.

I run @idia-spotted and @goop-painter-real for some reason, can't guarantee activity over there.

@kiris-snake-bs is where I'm gonna put a lot of my snake posting!!!!

I spam reblog tell me if u dont want me to do that to your posts

I dont vent often but if I do it will be tagged simply "k vent" or untagged. sorry.

Uh idk anything else to add I'll do some more later

MY TAGS BECAUSE IM A SILLY LOSER WHO WILL LOSE THEM IF I DONT ADD THEM;

I try to always tag #twst book 6 and #twst book 7!

I tag characters with only their first name!!! Except Akechi I usually tag him as Akechi and uhm Akira akiren Ren I use them all.

Basic things are (fandom abrv (if applicable)) art/memes/writing/maybe smth else I've used b4 but idr

#fav: favs, I usually try to keep fandom stuff out of this though! (I still put fandom stuff there tho..)

#abs fav: again self explanatory (with fandom stuff though)

#my favs: my posts!!! That I love!!! That made me happy to make!!! Posts I don't wanna lose <3

#<3: this one is weird uhn. It's just favs but when it's fandom related!

#fave: heartwarming/mental health favs <3

#*b: this is weird too IT JUST MEANS BASED ON MY LIKES LOL I don't like typing it out ><

#*: honestly I don't know I think I use it to keep track of posts that I add on to? Adding a comment on the reblog instead of just tags.

#kirexa (media): liveblogging tag!!! (Unless I go back and mass tag edit u won't find sao/dangan games/yttd under this,, smtimes I abbreviate smtimes I don't (twst is abbreviated but Witch's Heart isn't for example!))

#kirexas (media): to differentiate liveblogging tag from just thoughts I have abt a media ,, not always used.

#adventures of kiris 5yo sister - my sister being a menace

#kiri hits their fucking limit (real!!1!1): me when I fuckign hit my (post) limit with one post

#kiri shrieks ★: laugh out loud tag

#kirexa answers: self explanatory lolol

#kirexa hall of fame: anything funny that is even vaguely kirexa related

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2023 tree

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(^mostly satire. Mostly.)

Going absolutely insnae*