#fuck mystra (derogatory)

[wheretheharekissesthefox]

Lavender and Starflower (Mobster AU) – Chapter 15

The Dekarios Clan reigns over Waterdeep as the city’s protector for centuries. Suddenly, the Clan gets challenged by Cazador, the head of the Szarr Clan that rules over Baldur’s Gate. Of course, such an attack won’t be tolerated and the intruder must be forced back and out of the City of Splendors. While fixing destroyed protection sigils, Gale, wizard prodigy and heir of the Dekarios Clan, meets a charming stranger called Astarion. And Gale makes the biggest mistake of his life; he invites the pale elf into his home.

Trigger warning (18+): mobster AU, mental torture, gore, vomiting, mentioning of grooming and paedophilia

I was inspired to start writing this fic when I saw this artwork by @arczism

'Mezzanotte' means 'midnight' in Italian. That's a little tribute to the D&D lore that Mystra uses the body of a woman (named Midnight) as a 'vessel' for herself so that she has a physical body.

Typical Goddess Behaviour™. Consent who and where? Yikes.

This is obviously an AU that isn't related to my other work.

"Where are you, you useless pet? Bring me the wizard and kill everyone who's in the way! Bring him to me now!"

Cazador's voice ripped through his mind like a sharp migraine-like pain, and Astarion was startled out of his reverie.

"If you won't be back at dawn, cut yourself open, untangle your intestines and stake yourself with a wooden table leg."

Astarion panted and whined, curling in on himself. His master's order tried to take hold of his body, but due to the collar, it didn't work. However, this powerplay of the two different kinds of magic, the vampire lord's and the sussur's angrily fighting each other, made Astarion feel like he was being ripped apart. A wave of nausea came over him and he groaned. Thankfully, he had his last meal, Gale's blood, more than a day ago.

Next to him, his lover stirred, opened his eyes blearily, and asked: "What's wrong?"

"Cazador's giving me orders." The vampire spawn whimpered and clutched the sheets so tightly he almost tore them. "It hurts."

"Shit, really?" Gale was immediately worried. "I should have known that the clash of the Arcane has a negative effect. How careless of me. Maybe, I can help."

"By introducing yet another type of magic to my body? Yeah, great," Astarion replied and gagged.

Gale placed his hand on his lover's forehead.

"This might be uncomfortable," he warned and muttered a healing spell.

The soothing warmth of it flooded through Astarion's body and he sighed in relief. His angrily pounding head calmed and the nausea subdued – until it didn't. Hastily, the elf turned around before vomiting onto the floor next to the bed. Thankfully, there wasn't much coming up.

"Oh, fuck..." he whined.

"I'm so sorry!" Gale said panicked and used a prestidigitation spell to clean up the mess. "I didn't think it would make it worse. How are you feeling now, little star?"

The addressed paused and frowned.

"Better," he answered. "The nausea's gone and Cazador isn't yelling at me at the moment."

Gale tenderly brushed a curl out of Astarion's face and asked: "Would you like a bath, or would you like to rest more?"

"I'd like a bath and then rest some more."

"That can be arranged," chuckled the wizard, kissing the vampire spawn's forehead. "I'll be right back."

He got up to fill the bathtub while the elf carefully stretched and followed him slowly. The bathroom smelled of lavender and Gale had cast Darkness on the windows, but it was still light enough to see. After rinsing his mouth to get rid of the lingering taste of bile, Astarion stepped into the tub with a sigh and sunk down in the water. He leaned his head back and closed his eyes.

"Mmh, this is nice," he mumbled.

Gale, who was kneeling next to the bathtub, smiled at him and ran his fingers through the elf's hair.

"May I pamper you and wash your hair?" he asked.

"I'd like that."

The wizard immediately set to work, wetting Astarion's hair carefully and massaging shampoo into it. The latter sighed contently, finally able to relax for the first time in two centuries. He couldn't remember a time where anyone had done something like this before. Thus, the vampire spawn wanted his lover to know about it.

"Thank you, Gale. It feels amazing. No one has ever done this before."

"What a shame," muttered the addressed as he rinsed the silver-white hair. "You deserve nice things."

Astarion reclined his head further to look at the wizard and told him: "That's what I have you for, darling."

Chuckling, Gale leaned forward and placed a kiss on the elf's forehead before finishing his work. Astarion got out of the tub and was wrapped in a fluffy, soft towel. Sighing happily, he stretched his limbs and rubbed his hair dry.

"You can even work magic without the Weave," he praised and Gale blushed cutely.

"I'm glad you're feeling better. Do you think you're ready to get the evidence in the Szarr palace tonight?"

Instantly, Astarion sobered up.

"Yes," he replied with a nod. "I want to get it over with as quickly as possible."

"I'll help you," the wizard said.

"No, I can do it myself!" replied the vampire spawn immediately with an angry hiss.

"I know you can do it alone," replied Gale softly, "but you don't have to do it alone."

Astarion looked at him, welling up. He'd been on his own for so long, watching his own back and keeping himself alive, that he'd forgotten how it was to have someone by his side.

"It would be nice if you'd come with me," Astarion admitted quietly. "I'm – I'm terrified."

"I know." Gale pulled him into a gentle hug and the elf closed his eyes to savour it. "Let's go back to bed. You deserve another nap."

Astarion let himself be led to the bedroom where Gale sat him down on the bed and carefully started to comb the vampire spawn's hair. The latter revelled in the pampering and sighed happily.

"You're good at this," he mumbled. "Have you done this before?"

"Yes, for Mys–" Gale cut himself off suddenly. When Astarion turned to look at him with a raised eyebrow, he said: "I did it for an ex-lover. She was... my first."

"Hm. The way you're avoiding to say her name indicates a nasty breakup," remarked the elf. Gale swallowed thickly and cleared his throat.

"Well... you're right. It was rather... unfortunate how we split ways." After a brief pause, he added: "Mystra. Her name's Mystra Mezzanotte."

"Was she a school crush, or something?"

"No." Gale hesitated again and Astarion wondered why until the wizard added: "She was my teacher."

The vampire spawn blinked at him, shocked.

"Wait, what?"

Visibly uncomfortable, Gale fidgeted around, explaining: "As the heir of the Dekarios Clan and an infamous child wizard prodigy, other kids and teachers alike were intimidated by me and didn't like me. Some schools flat out refused to accept me as a student, thus, my mother had to find private tutors so that I could be homeschooled. Mystra was one of them." The wizard paused, fidgeting with the comb while Astarion impatiently waited for him to continue. "It was love at first sight for me. I adored her. She's beautiful, talented and powerful. She's like a goddess. And she taught me so much and... whenever she praised me for a task, I was happy and wanted to do even better next time. I so desperately wanted to be her equal."

"Even though you're the heir of the Dekarios Clan, you were a child," Astarion remarked. "You could never have been her equal."

"I know," muttered Gale, biting his lower lip. "But I surely tried to be so. And my efforts paid off. When I was ten and incredibly lonely, I begged my mum for a kitten, and after she refused, I summoned Tara. When I told Mystra about it, she kissed me for the first time as a reward. After that, I was always rewarded with a kiss when I did good, and when I was fourteen, we had sex for the first time. Back then, it felt like heaven." Gale huffed humourlessly and Astarion felt the urge to retch. "Mystra told me to keep it a secret or otherwise she'd be fired and we'd never see each other again. Scared that it might come true, I never told my mother about all this, and then, when I turned eighteen..." The wizard swallowed thickly and screwed his eyes shut. Encouragingly, Astarion took his hand, gently stroking his knuckles. "When I was eighteen, she threw me away. She quit the job, explaining to me that I don't need her tutoring anymore because I'm an adult now. When I asked her about our relationship, she told me it was over and left. I was utterly heartbroken. But do you know what's the worst?" The vampire spawn shook his head and the wizard barked a sharp laugh with tears in his eyes. "I still didn't tell my mother. I'm too scared that she'd get angry and take revenge on Mystra. My mum never shied away from killing people. I'm... I'm so pathetic."

He hid his face in his palms and Astarion was shaking with anger.

"Gale..." he said, "that is... not normal."

"I know," whispered the addressed and sobbed. "But I can't tell my mother, I fear for Mystra's life because I still care about her."

"She sexually abused you, Gale, she groomed you. For fuck's sake, she had sex with you when you were still a child! Every parent who loves their kid would want to kill such a paedophile!"

"She isn't a paedophile."

"Of course, she is! Do you really think it's normal and alright for an adult to have sex with a literal child?!"

Gale swallowed thickly and shook his head, whispering: "No."

"Gods, Gale..." Astarion cupped the wizard's tear-streaked face. "What happened to you is horrible, and it's not your fault. None of it is."

The wizard's voice shook as he said: "Why am I still scared to tell my mum about it? Why do I still fear for Mystra's safety?"

"Because she groomed you, brainwashed you, and you were truly in love with her and afraid to lose her," Astarion told him. "And then, she broke your heart and you couldn't tell your mother because you still loved Mystra and you also were afraid of your mother's reaction. After all, you don't want to disappoint her, do you, and because of that, you're too ashamed to tell the truth. And now, you're so deep in it and it's so long ago that you just shoved it down to not deal with it. I get it, Gale, I truly get it." He kissed the wizard tenderly. "Thank you for telling me, my love. Your secret's safe with me, but if you ever want to come clean about it, I'm all for it."

"Thank you," Gale croaked out amid tears. He fell into Astarion's embrace and the latter held him tight and let him cry on his shoulder.

"We all have old demons we deal with," the vampire spawn muttered while stroking the wizard's hair. "That's nothing to be ashamed about."

"Ready?"

Astarion nodded silently.

"Alright, remember; the invisibility spell doesn't prevent others from bumping into you, plus, we can't see each other either, thus we must hold hands when entering Cazador's palace. All the documents must be placed inside our bags, or otherwise they're not invisible. If things go south, use the teleportation device to get the hells out of there. Playing heroes won't help us. Any questions?"

Astarion shook his head, still silent. He couldn't put it off any longer, it was time. The vampire spawn was so scared, he felt sick to the stomach.

"You got this," Gale told him sternly, gently squeezing his hand. "We got this. We'll break into his palace, grab the evidence, and then... we'll give Cazador the hells."

Astarion had to smile and gave his lover a quick nod.

"We'll kick his ass."

"That's right," nodded the wizard with a grin.

He kept holding the vampire spawn's hand while casting the invisibility spell and opened a portal. Together, they stepped through it and arrived in Baldur's Gate.

[nejackdaw]

"I don't need the stars, Gale. I have you."

"Then have me--but have the best possible version of me."

Gale I'm about to push you out of the fucking boat oh my god

[gewhanaa]

Gale is romantic and devoted at heart, and if anything, it's the REASON he's so easily manipulated by Mystra. He has these grand ideas of love that are so real to him. He's blind to how cold and uncaring Mystra really is because they're lovers, aren't they? Love is something poetic, something to be devoted to. I think it took him a long time to realize that not everyone see love like he does.

challenging this notion that Gale is only super romantic and devoted because of Mystra Trauma, with: maybe he’s just romantic and poetic? maybe he’s just a devoted partner, for multiple reasons, and most of them are hes just that type of person? maybe hes just the best man to ever walk or something? like i think the trauma*tm probably made him self conscious over his self worth but like, he explains he’s always a “grand acts of love” guy. Hes poetic and creative so like, i dont think that stops with how he falls in love my dudettes and dudes

[wild-magic-oops]

Durge who thinks getting fucked astral style feels a bit blasphemous bc of the whole Mystra-weave situation, and being very on board with that bc fuck Mystra (derogatory) but also - blasphemy just feels very nice, very delicious... for some reason. A mystery

[kaisam]

Spicy Baldur's Gate panel at Pax was spicy and an absolute blast. Just a couple of the unhinged slides from the panel - there were a lot of good ones. General conclusions of panel - everyone loves Karlach (best girl), Nato has incorrect opinions, Wyll was done dirty by the game/narrative, fuck Mystra (derogatory). The panel also went 40 minutes over. My ribs hurt from laughing and my voice is dead. Good times.