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aiimaginesbts · 7 years

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What You Never Had: Chapter 6

Seokjin x Reader (ft. Jimin, Namjoon and Jungkook)

Genres: Royalty AU, angst, fluff

Word count: 3,800 words

Chapter 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 (M) | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 (M) | 13 | 14 (Final)

A/N: Thank you Ann @godsavemefrombts for beta-ing this whole series for me so far, and for putting up with me (especially my cliffhangers)! The angst is light in this chapter but more drama will be coming~

Disclaimer/Copyright

He loves me.

That one delightful thought still stood out amongst the many memories you made with Jin that night, days after it happened. The sight of him carrying out his duties, even from afar, made you smile. When his delectable lips curled upwards from a close distance, yours followed suit. Just the thought of him made you delirious, basically. He didn't need to be within your sights to make you feel like you were on cloud nine. You had fallen so deeply for him.

"Did something happen?" Jimin's voice pierced through your euphoric thoughts. You looked at him, startled from your daydream.

"Why do you ask?"

"You've been staring into space and grinning to yourself like an idiot a lot lately," he said teasingly. "So, did something happen?"

This conversation seemed eerily familiar, but this time instead of finding a way to evade his question, you turned away from his inquisitive gaze. "Nothing happened," you lied even as your cheeks started to burn at the thought of what transpired that night between you and Jin.

Doubt was evident in Jimin's supposedly non-committal hum at your answer, but thankfully he didn't pursue the matter. Trying to ignore his eyes boring into the side of your skull as you glared determinedly at the garden from your balcony, you asked awkwardly, "So... what were we talking about?"

"You looking so obnoxiously happy these past few days for no reason, apparently," he deadpanned, finally making you flash your glare in his direction.

"I meant before that," your words came out between gritted teeth.

"Nothing, we just sat down, remember?" He cackled, satisfied that he got a rise out of you. "Actually I came here to ask if you'd like to accompany me tomorrow."

"Where to?" As far as you could recall, Jimin had plans the next day. A commitment that didn't involve you.

"The National Library."

That you remembered. Regret had filled you when you heard that it had not been taken care of well by the previous director. The matter had only come to attention when a new director had taken over and received complaints that the old one had brushed aside. "Weren't you supposed to go with Namjoon?"

"I was, but something came up and now he's too busy to go," those pouty words were accompanied by a bland face. You'd doubt that Jimin was unaffected by Namjoon's inability to accompany him, but you knew that Jimin wasn't that petty. Besides, both of you had noticed that the eldest had been occupied lately, although you hadn't been able to ask him what had kept his time filled. As it was, you could only help him whenever you could. This was another chance for you to do so.

That was how, instead of whiling the afternoon by yourself after lunch the next day, you sat in front of the mirror in your room to get ready for the visit to the National Library. As you applied a little rouge on your lips, you heard Ji Eun calling behind you, "Have you ever worn these? They look new."

Attention piqued by her question, you set the makeup down to turn around and look at the dark blue shoes she was holding up. Recognition sparked in your eyes when you remembered where the beautiful pair of heels came from. "They are a birthday present from Jimin," you explained, moving to sit on the other side of the plush stool you were sitting on and extending your hand up for them. "I meant to wear them at the coming of age ceremony, but—"

"They are too big," Ji Eun finished for you as she watched you slip the right one on.

"I think I'll wear them today." To the surprise of your lady-in-waiting, you took the other shoe and stuck your left foot into it.

"Is that wise?" She asked, brows furrowed as you stood up, testing the fit of the heels. They didn't, of course, but you gave Ji Eun a reassuring smile. "They're just a tad too big. It should be fine, since I'm not going to do any dancing today. At least, I don't plan to."

She returned your silly joke with a small smile of her own and a nod, then walked with you to the courtyard where Jimin was waiting by the carriage with a small escort. Immediately your eyes were drawn to one of the figures wearing the dark blue Royal Guard uniform. You and Jin exchanged a lightning fast, furtive glance, just quick enough for you to bite your lower lip to keep yourself from beaming at him. From the top of his horse, he cut a dashing, imposing figure, but you caught the very corners of his lips threatening to curl into the tiniest of smiles of his own.

Your heart danced at the sight, but Jimin's offer to help you into the carriage cut the organ's twirling routine short. Graciously, although ruefully taking his hand, you climbed inside and settled next to the window while he climbed after you. Unfortunately you only caught a glimpse of Jin as he rode past the window towards the front of the carriage, but Jimin soon distracted you from your little disappointment.

"Those look familiar," he said with a twinkle in his eye. Following the direction his eyes were pointing at, you looked down to see your feet peeking out from under your dress.

"They do?" You teased, happy that he noticed that you were wearing the shoes he gave you.

"Do you like them?"

You nodded. "They are very pretty." Jimin did a great job getting you a present that suited your tastes perfectly. You only wished that he did as good a job picking the right size, but you didn't want to tell him that and hurt his feelings.

The library was not far from the center of the city, and in no time the group came to a stop. As soon as you stepped off the vehicle, you had to tilt your head up to take in the impressive, circular structure, standing tall at three stories at the very least. Jimin led the way towards the sharply-dressed man in his forties waiting expectantly at the entrance of the building and you followed without complaint. Until a sudden force from below kept your right foot from moving forward.

A surprised shriek tore from the bottom of your throat, but before you could even travel halfway towards the ground, a pair of large hands caught you by the arms.

"Are you all right, Your Highness?" Jin's concerned face peered from your side as he gently but firmly pulled you to an upright position. You nodded, feeling a blush creep up and colouring your cheeks. It was unclear even to you whether it was due to Jin's close proximity or if it was caused by your very public display of clumsiness. To draw both yours and Jin's attention away from your reddened face, you swiveled your head back to see the cause of your near mishap. The narrow heel of right shoe had decided to wedge itself between the cobblestones.

Jin followed your line of sight towards the offending article of clothing. "Hold on," he whispered gently, guiding your hand to hold on to him for balance as he bent down to pry the shoe from the ground, then knelt down on one knee before you. Before you could utter a word of protest, he'd lifted your leg to place your foot on his thigh.

You were painfully aware of your burning face and the stare of Jungkook, one of the royal escorts staying behind with you as Jin swept the hem of your skirt up, exposing the bare foot. His touch was soft, tender, managing to sneakily brush your ankle as he deliberately slipped the heel back on.

Your sharp intake of breath at the contact was almost inaudible. The charged moment was once again broken by Jimin's loud voice. "What's keeping you?"

It was as if Jin's solid thigh had caught fire. That was how quickly you pulled your leg back to stand on your own two feet. With your hand removed from his broad shoulder, Jin stood up, facing Jimin. His own features did not betray his emotions, almost as if he didn't feel anything at all. Your ankle, on the other hand, still tingled from his touch, but you tried to emulate him and prevent your own emotions from betraying you.

"My shoe came off," you said sheepishly to Jimin's raised eyebrows. Your excited, anxious heart beat a rapid rhythmic tune as he paused, but calmed down when he tilted his head towards the library, saying, "Come, the director is waiting."

Jin followed behind as you strode inside and matched Jimin's steps. The director was already by his side, informing him of the funds needed to spruce up the facility. You listened for a while, walking across the ground floor of the building. It was beautiful. Rows of shelves filled with books lined the vast space. The sunlight streaming through numerous windows was softened by the thick glass panes and lent the place a bright, peaceful glow when combined with lamps installed throughout.

This place does need to be repainted, you agreed internally while Jimin nodded at one of the director's many comments for improvements. However, before you could voice out your agreement, the sight of a young woman balancing a large stack of books caught your eye.

"Need some help with that?" Without waiting for an answer, you shifted half of the books that was burdening her into your arms.

Her eyes grew as round as saucers when she saw the person who had taken the weight from her. "Your Highness, I couldn't possibly—"

"We don't have many helpers at the moment, as you can see." Immediately the director took the opportunity to point out. "Book Ja, don't carry so many books at a time," he reprimanded the helper.

"He's right, you could hurt your back or fall," Jin interjected as he took most of the volumes from you and her, then picked up even more from the cart, contradicting himself.

Book Ja looked at you helplessly but you simply smiled at her; a silent reassurance. "Where do these go?"

Her eyes became comically larger with panic, but when they darted to see Jimin's huge grin before he led the older man away, she gave up reluctantly, "They go in the next aisle. Arrange them alphabetically."

You nodded, marching towards the next row of shelves with Jin trailing behind you. The helper's stare was difficult to ignore, but she soon turned her attention back to her task and you concentrated on yours. Deliciously aware of Jin's presence just next to you, you carefully slotted the books back to their proper places, keeping an alert ear on the director's droning voice.

It didn't escape your notice that the section you and Jin were in housed dozens of volumes, both thin and thick, of medical treatises. Falling back into your normal routine with him before your coming of age ceremony, you casually struck a conversation with him. "You have a little knowledge in medicine, don't you?"

Jin considered your question with a doubtful tilt of his head. "I'm not sure if knowing how to perform simple first aid qualifies as having knowledge in medicine, Your Highness."

Humming your acknowledgement to his answer, you continued, "What sort of books do you usually read, then?" You had a good idea of his interests, but it was hard to think of a reason as to why you'd never asked him this question before.

"A little on science, but mostly tactical books," he replied, sliding a large tome into its place on one of the higher shelves.

Laughter filled the vicinity at your amusement to his answer. "I should have guessed." The conversation went on, back and forth between you and Jin. Both of you were careful of the topics being discussed, with him making sure to address you properly given Book Ja's presence nearby, but you didn't mind. Especially when you could, through the gaps above the books, see her shoulders gradually relax as she became more comfortable with the situation, and started to lift too many books in one go again.

The title of the treatise in your hands read; Ramesseum Medical Papyri. Eyes widening at your find of the ancient manuscript, you made a silent note to visit the library yourself in the future, before turning around to place it with the R's. Soft grazing sounds filled the next few moments as the three of you organised the printed works into their places.

Then, a loud, female grunt sounded from behind you. Followed by an even louder thump. Right after that, an ominous creaking sound, accompanied by a looming shadow over you. You looked behind to see the heavy bookshelf falling down on you. Quickly you pivoted to the right, trying to avoid the huge, heavy weight, but you tripped in your too-large shoes.

Before you could make sense of anything, a firm yet warm form knocked you back into the floor. Eyes wide, you could only watch with helplessness at Jin as he shielded you from the avalanche of books, his body shaking as he tried not to wince every time a particularly heavy tome whacked his back. He beamed at you reassuringly, but your lips couldn't stop trembling, upset that he was forced to endure pain because of you.

"Y/n!!" Jimin's call for you was frantic and full of fear. Worry for Jin was first priority in your mind, but you could hear footsteps thundering against the wooden floor, stopping close by. As the burden was lifted off of Jin, so was the anxiousness in your heart. Completely forgetting about the people around you, you helped Jin up into your arms, careful to avoid touching his back as much as you could. Only when the other escorts pulled him away that you could finally see anything else.

"Are you hurt anywhere?" Jimin's question directed at you was urgent. You shook your head, staring his pale face down resolutely.

"I'm fine, but—" Your gaze followed Jin as he was brought away with the support of two of the other escorts.

"He should be fine," Jimin cut in with a sharp glare before you could finish. Taking your hand in his, he led you towards the jittery director. The helper was openly in tears next to him.

"Your Highness, I deeply apologise," he stuttered while Book Ja was unable to utter a word between rapid hiccuping.

"Next time, be more careful. Trying to rush work can lead to mistakes and accidents," Jimin's reprimand was level, but grim. When he continued, his voice was kinder. "See that she is well." With a gesture at Book Ja and a curt nod, he walked out of the library. His steps were smaller, ensuring that you could keep pace instead of dragging you with him. As blazing sunlight greeted you from the sky, you saw Jungkook step down from the carriage.

"Are you certain about this, Your Highness?" His question was directed at Jimin, who nodded his assent.

"There is no point waiting for another carriage to be sent for him when we can make use of his horse," Jimin confirmed before turning to you. "Do you mind riding back with me?"

As you put two and two together, you understood that Jimin had instructed for Jin to be placed inside the carriage. You wished to see if he was really all right, but you couldn't risk possibly drawing attention to your relationship with him. Thus with a reluctant nod, you trailed after Jimin towards Jin's beautiful black horse.

The ride back sidesaddle in front of Jimin towards the castle was silent and went by unnoticed by you, yet somehow it seemed ages before you arrived. Jungkook sped ahead to deliver the news. It was difficult to contain your agitation when you were whisked away by several attendants the minute you'd arrived at the castle courtyard. Even more than that, you were upset with yourself, with your position, that prevented you from looking in on the man that you loved.

Ji Eun didn't even bother to try and stop you later that night. "Just be careful," she warned.

"I won't take long," you promised with a nod as you slipped out of your door into the long, mostly empty hallway.

It was earlier in the evening than it was the first time you sneaked into Jin's room, and there were still a number of people up and about. This time in a daring feat, you'd only donned your own dress, a simple garment that didn't draw attention, but not to be mistaken as Ji Eun's uniform. You planned to simply tell the truth if you were caught; that you were worried about your Royal Guard and wanted to see how he was faring. It was probably not a good idea, considering that Jimin didn't even allow you to ride back in the carriage with Jin earlier that afternoon. However, there was no need to get your lady in waiting involved more than she was.

Despite being determined, you were still nervous as you swiftly made your way towards Jin's room. Almost as nervous as you were the first time, casting just as many furtive glances as you approached your destination. Your knock on his door was more urgent than you intended. The voice answering it was unmistakably Jin's gentle one, but you couldn't make out the words through the thick door separating you. Remembering that it might be difficult for him to move due to his injuries and that he probably wouldn't have answered if he didn't want disruptions, you turned the doorknob, pushing the obstacle forwards cautiously.

"Jin?" You called softly, right before you'd opened the door wide enough to see him. The room was already lit with a lamp on the table, casting mysterious shadows in the far edges of the chamber. On the other side, Jin laid on the bed. Your heart did a flip when you saw that he was shirtless. He was in his stomach, baring his back, but his head was turned towards you, a small smile lighting up his handsome face and putting you at ease. "I knew you'd come." It seemed he was torn between his joy and need to admonish you.

The door was closed as quietly as possible, then you made your way to his side. A strange, tight sensation gripped your heart and robbed you of breath when you saw the bruises that covered his back.

"Looks worse than it actually is," correctly interpreting the horror in your expression, Jin's reassurance was gruff and a little muffled by his position.

Unconvinced, you reached out, fingertips lightly brushing against discoloured skin. Your eyes were keen and sharp, taking note of his features as you ran the pads of your fingers over him, looking for signs of pain. Every wince, while well-covered didn't escape your notice. Each one was a blow to your chest.

"Did you put anything on it?" You didn't even try to hide your frustration at his condition.

"The doctor did, a few hours ago," he informed you. "I should reapply it soon, but it is a little difficult to reach." He grinned sheepishly up at you, and you couldn't help your lips from turning skywards in affection at his childishness.

"Where is it? I'll apply it for you." He lazily gestured at his bedside table with his chin, and you retrieved the small container. The smell of herbs was strong, but you didn't find it repulsive. Gingerly you covered his bruises with the ointment, calming yourself as you watched the soothing effect reflect on his features.

"This is nice."

Your tinkling laughter at his remark was a contrast to his quiet chuckles as you finished your task and put the medicine away. Before you could even wonder what to do now that you were done, he'd reached out to clasp your hand in his.

"Could you stay here, just for a little bit?"

"Of course," you answered without hesitation, even though you were startled by his request. It wasn't like Jin to ask for something for himself, and you were more than happy to oblige. He patted the empty space next to him. Going around the bed, you took his offer, laying on your side as he twisted his head to look at you.

"I'll stay here until you fall asleep." It was as much a statement as it was an indirect question. Truthfully you never wanted to leave his side. Jin nodded as you brushed his fringe out of his eyes. He'd rather keep your hand in his though, as evidenced when he snatched it again. You giggled, letting him do so, content to just stare at each other while he rested.

"I was told that you are well, but are you really unhurt?" He asked with a little frown marring his brow.

"Yes, I'm fine, thanks to you."

"Good." He let out a sigh of relief and closed his eyes. For a moment, you thought he'd gone to sleep, but he suddenly opened them again, as if just remembering something. "It's unfortunate to have you here with me and to be unable to do the things I want to do to you."

His words sent tingles down your spine and a furious blush up to your cheeks. Suddenly you were acutely aware of how the heat from his hand was enveloping yours. Deep chuckles sounded from inside his throat again at your reaction, but he only closed his eyes again, releasing a breath that was tinged with regret this time.

Your whole being sang with love for him. Sliding closer, you kissed his forehead and whispered, "This will have to do for today."

"Mmm," he hummed contently and threw an arm around you to keep you close. Wanting nothing but for Jin to get his rest, you allowed silence to fill the room, satisfied with just watching him. It didn't take long for his breaths to even out. Aware that you had stayed well past the time that would be wise to return, you finally, carefully extracted yourself from his embrace. The lamp on the table was extinguished, and you ruefully stepped into the hallway again.

The journey back to your chambers was short on swift feet, until you froze when you saw Namjoon talking to a flustered Ji Eun just outside your room. There was no time to think of any excuse because your movement around the corner caught his attention immediately, and his head swiveled in your direction.

"There you are! Where have you been?"

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