#fssy

[lotusarchon]

I had to make a whole google doc to sort my thoughts on this, that's how mad I am tbh. My friends have made explanations which you can find here, and here. And while I told myself that after that post I was done, seeing my friend receive a comment like this was the final pushing point I needed.

I'm both going to ramble about Nezha here again, and I'm going to try and explain this in a way that'll get people to understand, as someone who once followed an Eastern religion too + I'm going to be stating my basic thoughts here so maybe some things won't make sense.

Mild info about me: I'm from Trinidad. My family is described with East Indian descent but clearly, I'm not from India itself. My knowledge of Hinduism is rather basic because I quit religion thanks to traumatic experiences related to it, however not lacking fully. From my father's side, specifically his mother, they practice Hinduism and can even be considered devout Hindus (if I'm to believe all the statues and pictures of about almost every single Hindu god). Though my knowledge is basic, understand that I'm not Hindu nor Indian, so of course these are my opinions and my experiences with Hinduism, and I do not advise you taking my word fully to heart. I'm only trying to explain something to the LMK fandom in the best way I know how too, by referencing another Eastern religion that isn't half as popular as Daoism/Buddhism.

There's only one show I know where Hinduism is portrayed, and it's an anime/manga series called Record Of Ragnarok (Shuumatsu No Valkyrie), and from what I know it's not well liked by others (and even banned I think?) because of the fact Shiva is weaker than Zeus and the supposed sexualization of Parvati, Kali and Durga? It's been a while so I could be wrong on this though.

Why am I bringing this topic up to a rant about a lego character though?

#1) Fiction vs Religion and Reality

While one half expresses discontent and discomfort, I've seen others who clearly don't mind because Shiva is still badass and cool. I myself had some qualms about his appearance in the beginning because while I did quit religion, this was a god I used to worship, and seeing him in an anime/manga and be sexualized and simped for was…uncanny, to say the least. Overtime I grew numb to it though because it was genuinely funny and even I, an ex Hindu, found him attractive, and had not much hesitation writing smut about him in past fics. 

Similarly, I can imagine this is how Daoists and Chinese had originally felt about Nezha in Lego Monkie Kid [Only referencing LMK with Chinese deities. I'm aware there could be other media where they're in.] A bit weird at first but then overall got used to it because there's genuinely no harm done, as it's not meant to be an educational retelling of a god, but a fictional portrayal of him.

Returning to the point I mentioned with Shiva. When I first came across this series in 2021 (?), I did not feel too happy and comfortable with the image of a deity I've grown up worshipping as a child. I quit religion when I turned 13, so it's been nearly five years since I've had nothing to do with the main religion of my household; Hinduism. Still, I practically grew up worshipping this god I was taught to fear, and seeing a potrayal of him (which honestly in my opinion) didn't seem like a good thing at the time. 

Why did I eventually stop being bothered? Because this wasn't supposed to be retelling of Shiva. This was just a character with similarities to the god I worshipped, but wasn't the god. The series I watched wasn't even intending to teach audiences about any of the religions and real life figures they portrayed, they simply used them as inspiration to tell a story. They weren't accurate representations, but that was the point. It's a story about gods vs humans from history; of course it wasn't going to be accurate nor stay true to the figure they took inspiration from.

You can imagine then for a cartoon series meant to sell Legos. Lego Monkie Kid contains several characters that are known in Chinese myths and legends/religions. Of the most popular mentioned, there is Sun Wukong, one of the main characters in the series, Tang Sanzang otherwise known as Tripitaka and the Great Monk, Lady Guanyin mentioned in season 1, the one the fandom argues about, Nezha, the Jade Emperor in season 4, and most recently, Nuwa, and Heavenly Pagoda King, Li Jing. There may be others but these are the ones that are most known within the fandom. 

Mind you some of these figures are still very much worshipped now, but, point remains: the series was never intended to be a retelling of these characters stories, nor were they intended to be educational for audiences. They took inspiration directly, gave their own twists, and hence you have the story of LMK, meant to originally promote Legos and then eventually gave way to the series that this fandom belongs too.

These characters are not their source material, nor the origins of which they came from as religious figures. Sun Wukong is a Buddha within JTTW’s ends and if I'm right is still worshipped as such sometimes (?). He didn't hide away into a mountain at the end of his journey. His companions didn't die, nor were they reincarnated, but instead also acquired titles and became Buddhas as well. (Or gods? I frankly don't remember). Tang Sanzang as we've in season 4 was not some sort of brave, astute man in the book but rather a crybaby coward. Need I even point out that Nezha wouldn't have a giant mech to fight people, nor would he have such close deposition with the Jade Emperor? Or the fact that the Jade Emperor would be bested by someone like Azure Lion?

Not even counting Journey To The West and the Fengshen Yanyi, the real Tang Sanzang that Wu Cheng’en took inspiration of most certainly did not have a monkey, a pig, a water demon and a dragon turned horse with him on his journey. 

Why speak of all this?

To make my first point; religion and fiction are two very different things. Religion has existed for who knows how long, and fiction has recently decided to include fictional potrayals of these gods into stories and cartoons. From a writer's perspective, it's really interesting taking something that is a part of religion and writing it into your own works, with your own take on it.

And of course, brings me to the topic of Nezha.

Lego Monkie Kid Nezha is, according to an official writer within the show's team, an adult. Although many fans have their objections about this, supposedly because Nezha in other sources is a child god, and think that the writer only abruptly pointed out Nezha's an adult to save her own skin.

Taking all my points in consideration; let me humour the Nezha is a child god idea. What, exactly, does this have to do with Nezha in Monkie Kid? 

If Nezha, the god within Daoism and Buddhism, is supposedly a child deity, what law says that any other potryal of Nezha has to abide by this? 

By this logic. Shiva in the anime I mentioned above shouldn't be weaker than Zeus. He also shouldn't even be agreeing to fight mortals, as he's a deity far above such petty behavior. Zeus shouldn't be portrayed in books like PJO as a lecherous cheater, because in reality, Ancient Greece consisted of multiple kingdoms and thereby different interpretations of Zeus were merged together which is what consists of the myths we know of him today which is highly disrespectful, and Sun Wukong shouldn't be a mentor to MK, because he's supposed to be a Buddhist, and thereby wouldn't be entertaining fighting nuances.

Fiction doesn't not adhere to reality. The fact I need to say this astounds me because should this not be obvious? Lego Monkie Kid is a cartoon set in some sci-fi futuristic world with lego people walking around, where gods somehow need mechs to go around fighting, and there are animal-like demons/yaoguai walking around here and there. There is literally an arcade in the show with zero gravity. Do you possibly believe for a miniscule second that anything that goes down in a fictional setting will adhere to our reality??

And, even then, humouring the Nezha being a child deity concept > what law says that he has to be portrayed as a child in other pieces of fiction?? Especially when the fictional setting is not meant to be a retelling or for educational purposes, but rather to carry a plot. 

There is nothing, no law, no rules that insists that a religious figure must be portrayed as they are in a legend/myth for a fictional world.

Lego Monkie Kid Nezha is not the deity Nezha. He is a completely different character, which many of you should have realized from the exact moment he was brought into the show. They are not the same person. Never was. 

“Oh, it's disrespectful―” From a writer's perspective, I personally don't think so. If I wanted to make a story that involved a god, I wouldn't keep everything that makes that god who they are. There are some key points I would keep to make the story, but I would ultimately create an OC that shares some attributes to this religious figure, but it wouldn't be him. The show Record of Ragnarok does a good job with this in my opinion, because while many characters share some attributes to the real figures they're inspired by, the writers changed several things to create a proper story, and thereby making these characters OCs and not the actual gods themselves, and of course that logic applies to Lego Monkie Kid.

In the instance, again, Nezha the god from Daoism, is in fact a child deity, Nezha in LMK isn't. Nezha in LMK is someone who's entirely different from the god himself. 

So, the logic this fandom uses confuses me a lot. Do you not understand how to seperate fiction from religion?? Do many of you not understand media literacy, and what a writing process is like?

Sigh. Moving to another point―

#2) Character Designs

Sometimes, when it comes to character designs, anyone could just throw them into anything and think, “Yeah that's good.” Not much thought is given to a character's appearances depending, which I don't really blame as someone who's 1) done literature as a hobby and has seen my fair share of character designs, 2) creates characters myself. It's too hard thinking of a character's appearance, and even then when making them there normally wouldn't be any significance.

Nezha's design in LMK seems to be a huge source of debate when arguing about his age. It was actually brought up in my previous post, specifically that his hairstyle was often used by children at the time. 

I have a bone to pick with this point.

This is Nezha from Lego Monkie Kid:

However, this is Mei from the same show:

Before anyone starts, allow me to point out as a history geek that likes religion and pointless facts over politics: I am aware that there are different hairstyles to show certain things, including one's age and status and sometimes even personality. Do not bring up any points about the differences in these characters hairstyles with an excuse, “Oh, but you should know―”, because I know how hairstyles could be treated within history. 

However. Look at Nezha's hairstyle, and then Mei's. I've never seen the LMK fandom complain about Mei's age, because it was generally believed that MK and Mei are both at least 18 if not older, as the legal age for a driver's license in China is 18. 

Both Nezha and Mei are wearing a ‘bun’ type hairstyle. Mei's is arguably more of twin ponytails (?), but I'm not a hairstylist, so I don't know what they're called. To me they look similar, that's all I'm trying to say. And even if they weren't though―through a modern lense, a hairstyle isn't reserved for just any specific age. Anyone can wear a hairstyle they want. Keep in mind that the creators of LMK are also Western(?), and they chose a hairstyle for these two characters based on personality and appearances. 

A hairstyle is not reserved for any age. Grown women including my aunts have worn hairstyles similar to these just for fun.

That's point one.

Point two; Nezha is a very popular deity, much like Sun Wukong. In terms of recognition, Sun Wukong is very easy to recognize because of his staff and his overall cocky personality. 

Nezha however is an entirely different case. Most media potrayals of him always has the two-bun hairstyle of him, which is what makes Nezha recognizable. If you remove that specific hairstyle of his, you won't recognize him. It's iconic, and pointed out in this scene (The Legend of Hei) where Nezha makes an appearance as well.

[Characters sitting together. White haired boy (Hei + MC) looks at the older, dark haired boy (Nezha). Nezha looks back.]

Nezha: What? You want an autograph?

Hei: You're a boy?

Nezha: Yeah?

Hei: Your hairstyle is cute.

[Nezha looks in front with an annoyed expression.]

Nezha: If it weren't for the recognizability, I'd have changed it long ago.

Hei: Recognizability?

[Nezha removes the buns(? some form of them?) from his head. Three older figures glance at him.]

???: Who are you?

[Scene returns]

Nezha: See?

Aka, point being made: those buns are what makes Nezha recognizable. If he doesn't have that hairstyle, unless it's specifically pointed out, I'm certain majority would not recognize him. 

Some hairstyles are meant to be done for some form of meaning. But sometimes, as is the case with designs, they're just there just because no one wanted to make the characters bald. Using the excuse about Nezha's hairstyle to justify his age as a child is by far the lamest and dumbest excuse I've ever heard of, because the creators did not give him that hairstyle for the sake of some meaning anymore than MK was given his current hairstyle either. It's his logo at this point, ignoring his color scheme aside.

Even then, if the creators of Lego Monkie Kid intended for Nezha to be a child within the show, he would not appear as he is. Lego Monkie Kid has made children models, which we can see here (used from s3 and up in case someone tries to excuse the differences in seasons): 

And of course, Nezha's model;

Despite the perspective and low quality though, he's at least the same height as Red Son here:

If Lego Monkie Kid truly intended for Nezha to be a child, his appearance and model would be similar to the children's in the show. Perspective is difficult to find but you can clearly see he's about the same height as the other adult characters if not taller, and is not small like the child figures we see.

Pink isn't a children's color, and nothing about Nezha's clothing indicates a child. He very much looks like an adult and doesn't exhibit childish behavior as we see Red Son, Mei and MK do.

I've seen fans use his voice to point out he's an adult, but I'm not sure that's a valid point. I say this as someone who has a 13 year old brother and was recently a minor myself. 

Allow me to clarify: a voice isn't a clear proof of age. My father is a 45 year old man but sounds very much like a woman/teenage girl. My brother is 13 and sounds more of an adult than his father. My classmate in highschool was one year older than me and his voice was very high-pitched. 

The voice actors in LMK are directed to speak a certain way for a reason…in English. I'm not sure about Mandarin. In my opinion, Wukong's voice sounds like Son Goku's because it's a reference to the fact Wukong is what inspired Goku. Nezha's probably sounds deep and brooding not because he's a child but because it almost represents his own personality, and probably is a reference from another shonen protagonist Ichigo Kurosaki. MK's voice in the beginning sounds really childish to me but slowly as the events of s3, 4 and 5 happen it gets more deeper almost as a reference to show how his ‘innocence’ is slowly fading. 

Or, I might be looking to into it. Regardless, tdlr, don't use Nezha's voice in your argument. I've seen grown ass men have high pitched voices. 

Returning to my original point however; if you have an ounce of media literacy and understanding, you should be aware that some character designs are chosen for a reason. Nezha's icon is those two bun hairstyle, and the writers purposely chose it so old fans/readers of JTTW and FSYY and maybe other Chinese/Daoists would be able to recognize him and go, “Hey, that's Nezha from―”

Before I got into LMK, I read JTTW and also saw The Legend of Hei and the Nezha 2019 movie, so I knew him because of the hairstyle. And my first instinct of course was to point out, “That's the dude from TLOH!!” when I saw him. So, the hairstyle was chosen for the recognizability, and I highly doubt as a sign of age.

Even then, LMK Nezha aside, moving on to a different point.

#3) Sources Of Inspiration

The 21st century isn't really the first era where people are taking inspiration from other cultures. As a matter of fact, it's been happening for decades, and it's very prominent in religion, which someone of you would know if you both a) actually did proper research, b) gave a shit about what you're researching and c) studied history.

Hilariously, I have done all three of the above. 

I'm going to use a popular example here with Sun Wukong and Hanuman. Hinduism is supposedly largely considered one of the oldest religions in the world. If you truly think about it, certain Daoist deities are loosely inspired or are versions of Hindu gods, which I'm going to use here with a popular example (and provide a link too).

― Sun Wukong and Hanuman. The earliest Vedic records mention one of the supposed known monkey gods, and their similarities make scholars suggest Hanuman inspired Sun Wukong. Specifically his figure in JTTW, where it's speculated that the author must've had a copy of Vedic (?) hymns. While Sun Wukong does predate JTTW, Hanuman definitely has had some influence on him.

Much, much similarly, the deity known as Nezha, is also loosely inspired/based off the figure known as Nalakuvara, who appears in Hindu and Buddhist mythology, and often appears as a sexual trickster figure in Hindu and Buddhist literature.

Historically speaking, when it comes to religion and myths, something many people fail to understand is that before there was the idea of writing to tell a story, there was the process known as sharing from mouth to ear. Not in a literal sense, but rather that people often preferred to tell stories via word of mouth back then, and as things always go in history, there will be changes. The proof is literally right there. Nezha was originally known as Nalakuvara, yet when transmitted through Buddhist texts, he became known as Nazha, then Nezha. And as such, the Lotus Prince and Chinese god known as Nezha was created. A combination of Nalakuvara and the child god Krishna.

A lot of people will want to jump on that specific point that mentions Krishna being a child god, so allow me to immediately put you down right there.

Ex Hindu here; I did not even know there was a portrayal of Krishna as a child. Up until I stopped practicing Hinduism, I used to worship Krishna as an adult figure. In the paintings and statues my aunts had for Diwali as a child, he was always showcased as an adult.

Ironically, doesn't this apply for the actual god Nezha too? 

When it comes to religion and myths, many of you forget something very important; there is no such thing as a canon iteration. These aren't shows, these are stories from the past told through different people, and passed through many hands. There is no such thing as a canon version because almost everyone had their own version of a myth or story. Terms you may typically apply to fandoms don't apply to fucking religions and myths, and some of you are so chronically online that you forget it.

#4) The LMK Fandom's Chronically Online Attitude

I'm an ex Hindu who still faintly remembers some bits and pieces from my childhood while practicing this religion, especially during the Diwali period, where little me managed to get new information from library books about the gods my family worshipped. I personally didn't like sitting during the priest's (forgot what he was called) chanting though but the funny white thingy we used to have to wear was fun. 

There are some Hindu gods I'm familiar with, like Lakshmi, Kali, Durga and the other versions of her (I still can't recover from the one statue with her in a fish..) Parvati, Shiva, Vishnu, Hanuman (yaah), Rama and Sita, Ganesh (also yah) and of course, Krishna.  I also have watched my fair share of childhood movies and cartoons where the gods were mentioned or present―Karan & Arjun specifically struck the fear in me with Kali 😭😭 holy fuck that movie scared me with the creepy edits jeez T-T. There was also that one cartoon about Rama and Sita”s story specifically Hanuman, and this Indian TV series where this little girl was a loyal devotee to Ganesha (I had no idea rats were one of his uh signature animals holy shit).

I'm rambling here a bit because the childhood memories were fun, but the point I'm going for is though….

I am familiar with these gods I grew up with. And I know about them, maybe not enough but certainly enough to know how to properly respect them from back then. 

And, using Krishna as a prime example; if someone came up to me, or I came across anyone, who argues that the god I know is an immortal child, even though I have worshipped and adult version of him, I'd be so fucking pissed. Krishna is seen as an adult, I worshipped him as an adult, but there are cases where he's a child god, and that's fine! But to have someone tell you that you're wrong about the god you know about because they got some basic information off the internet, undoubtedly, I'm going to be pissed. Especially when it's from a Western fan who has no fucking brain.

So, of course, imagine how devotees of Nezha and Chinese people must be feeling every single time this fandom fucks about with Nezha's age. I saw it myself; people told my friend that a) she was lying and b) her statement is irrelevant just because “I did my proper research, and even if you're Chinese you can still be a proshipper, Nezha's a child deity.”

It's genuinely so fucked up to me how the LMK fandom act towards Nezha's age. You guys will ignore the people who are willing to provide accurate information for the sake of being in the right and accusing people for being a proshipper over a deity they have more experience with than you, a Western fan who has no knowledge of Eastern religion.

It's insane. There are actual Daoist and Chinese who are pointing out the fact Nezha isn't an immortal fucking child. 

You're not only disrespectful, you insane, childish and most importantly chronically online. Nezha the god isn't a fictional character, there's nothing ‘canon’ about him. He's a god who's lived for decades longer than you, and his existence predates yours. People have long sinced worshipped Nezha, and the fact that you can so boldly tell someone they're wrong about the god they've worshipped is so disrespectful.

Do you not realize, as Nezha is worshipped as a child, he's worshipped as an adult? Do you not take into account how absolutely disgusting and horrible you are telling Daoists and Chinese who have stated time and time again the information of Nezha being an immortal child is factually incorrect that they're wrong and know nothing??

I'm repeating my statement; I'm an ex Hindu, but if anyone told me that Krishna's an immortal child too and then point out I'm wrong and my point doesn't matter, I would be seething. And I don't blame my friend who's losing their temper about Nezha's age. 

What amazes me though, somehow, is the fact that. If anyone who was Chinese + Daoist agreed with your claims, as Cole from Twitter once did, none of you would've spoken that way to my friend. But of course, once she points out she's Chinese/ex Daoist and disagrees with you, majority of the opinions switched because, she wasn't agreeing with your headcanon, right? So even though she's Chinese, she's bad because she disagreed with you.

You're all disgusting and fucking weird.

And the fact y'all in this fandom will habitually prove yourselves as hypocrites by attacking people, and then ignoring the ones who are capable of proving you're wrong to cling to a false idea is insane. You guys need some actual help, holy fucking shit. 

Nezha isn't an immortal child. That's a god. If he was intended to be a child in LMK, there would've been statements about it. 

Seperate fiction from religion, and seperate your headcanon from canon and the actual god. If you think this biased headcanon is okay and attacking people that point you out for being wrong is somehow okay, I sincerely ask that you take a break from the internet, and read a book.

No, don't just read a book. Read a history book. Pick up some knowledge, understand how religion and history works. 

Furthermore. The research some of you guys are doing is actually shit, by the way. You guys aren't researching properly if you can pull up with Nezha is 12, thing. If you actually cared about his age, you'd put more effort and actually stop being disrespectful to the people who are giving you the proper information. You only research surface level so you can attack people.

And additionally, stop playing the Devil's advocate. Most of you are just Western fans who think you know everything from reading one book or watching one show. You read JTTW or watch OSP’s videos and suddenly, you know more than an actual Chinese person or Daoist. You look up Wikipedia and think, “Oh yeah, I'll go with this!” And that's it. Most of you at best can provide only three websites at most, and I can bet my ass that these websites with information about Nezha's age was written by a fan who got their information from a shit source.

I love History, and most specifically, I love religion. Not so much the divine aspects as it is about the myths that surround it. Whenever I get into a fandom, I need to find out more about their religion and history. Getting into JTTW, and eventually, LMK, pushed me into a rabbit hole of Chinese myths that I really enjoy learning. But dealing with idiots who think they know more?? It's sickening as shit.

I'd like to think I'm good at literature things because once it's a religion or myth I want to learn everything about it. But I know I don't know everything, and I know especially I have more to learn. I'd never tell someone who is a part or worships the religion/culture I'm learning that they're factually incorrect about it just because I have an opinion and I learnt my info from a random source.

You guys in the LMK fandom are incredibly entitled. The Nezha is 12 controversy is a headcanon, which became worst by that asshat Cole on Twitter. And because so many of you don't want to learn the truth, whenever someone tries to point out and help you, you ignore them or attack them, and deny their heritage.

And honestly?? You guys suck. 

And this is coming from me!! Some of y'all are grown ass adults too!! And yet I'm childish and immature!?!

Brother I literally turned 18 a few months ago, yet I'm 100% certain I'm not throwing a blasted hissy fit over a fucking god the way some of you all who are most definitely adults are doing.

And finally, the one thing that actually does make me laugh is because I'm pretty sure most of you didn't do History classes. One of the most important things my history teacher taught me is; don't use Wikipedia as a source of viable information. Thousands of people are capable of accessing Wikipedia and changing information as they want, and so it's much better to find book solid resources from libraries. I did in fact use Wikipedia too (hypocritical of me yeah) so of course I wouldn't advise using the screenshots I provided from Wikipedia as evidence to the argument, because anything on Wikipedia can be changed. If I'm feeling extra petty I could change something myself to be in the right.

Furthermore, if you dare to bring up only JTTW and FSSY as a plausible argument about Nezha's age, I'm genuinely going to throw hands and fuck your mother. I think my friend also mentioned it in their posts but I'll mention it here too; JTTW does NOT state Nezha's age. I've read JTTW, and aside from Wukong vs Nezha there's nothing else that states Nezha's age. For all we're aware of, Wukong called Nezha a kid just out of spite, and I do it too when I'm arguing with someone. FSSY is the Investiture of the Gods and the ORIGINS!! Do you THINK a book about the ORIGINS of the gods would focus on other aspects about them!!? No!!

I expect some of the arguments I might get are;

"Oh, Nezha [appearances] could be wearing a glamor!" That is a headcanon, as we see nothing in LMK to refute that. Macaque's scar is canon because it's shown within the show. Nezha's appearance has NOT fluctuated since he was introduced. The idea of him using a glamor or illusion is a HEADCANON unless proven by the show. And headcanons are NOT vital.

"But you use Wikipedia too :(" Which I pointed out and made aware of, which is I also doubt that source myself. If any of you did History, your teachers are supposed to INFORM you that using a website is NOT a good idea for backing up information, and it's much better to use books or other trusted sources. In the case of Nezha, I'm trusting actual Daoists/Chinese who knows more about him than I do. It's because I did PROPER research that I even came across a good source of information, aka @ruibaozha, who I'm sure can share more light on this than me! The fact that some of you guys won't even acknowledge them is almost proof that...you're clinging to a headcanon. Jackass.

"But Nezha in JTTW/FSSY are 7/12 and that's where LMK takes it's inspiration from so obviously―" We've seen for a fact LMK does NOT follow JTTW to the letter. Jade Emperor beating Wukong?? Lady Bone Demon being a powerful foe and being trapped in a bunker? Azure even being able to kill the Emperor? Majority of the LMK fandom likes to point out that LMK Macaque and JTTW Macaque are two different people, especially when you claim that Macaque is a bad character because he cannibalized the monkeys. So then, with this logic, JTTW Nezha, FSSY Nezha, and LMK Nezha are also three seperate figures. I swear someone made a post about the differences JTTW and FSSY Nezha have too, but I can't find it so meh. The point still remains though. LMK Nezha are two different people, you're not making any sense to me about that argument. Even then, LMK isn't taking direct inspiration and putting their own twist. Who says anything needs to be accurate??

"The writer only said Nezha's an adult to ship lotuspeach!" Are you faintly aware people, actual Chinese people, have shipped these characters together? Proshippers can come from anywhere but I genuinely doubt every single person is a proshipper because of course, they're aware their god isn't an eternal child. On top of that, in a situation like this another writer would point out that Nezha ISN'T an adult. No one has argued against this claim, so why persist? Where's your logic coming from if not entitlement?

I want this to be the last time I have to talk about Nezha, because I made my blog to write porn and me smooching my favorite LMK characters. I kinda don't really like making discussions like this because that's not the point of my blog.

However...I do like rambling. A lot :)))

Anyways, point blank. LMK fandom needs to grow out of this entitled mindset and stop ignoring the facts from experts. You guys are just being annoying at this point.

My argument isn't really valid tbh, just pointless rambling because I only know basic information. I think you guys should find proper information from accounts online.

Also, if you're gonna argue: don't bring be albeist, racist etc etc. I'm capable of cussing you out without bringing up your mental health, race or identity :)))

[acoraxia]

No longer giving a Live Rhy Reaction to FSSY sorry guys ella called me a nerd

can you guys hold on to my AU and designs for a bit im reading my grocery shopping list and it’s 260 pages so it’s gonna take a while

I mean just look at it

massive

anyways i’ll brb

[loryandrade72]

Sobre o 1°Dia da Show Agro #EncontroMulheresdoAgro (em Show Agro Coopernorte) https://www.instagram.com/p/Bx2nan-FSSY/?igshid=yjz25dwbsl8u

[dear-fellow-travelers]

the pup is.. growing fssy because they need to nap, because after being  cleaned.. it’s time to take a nap.. right..?

[lotusarchon]

Help I just found nezha is older than wukong lmaooo

Also can we talk about how nezha was such a menace when younger? Can you imagine the drama that would have happened if he had also met a younger wukong?

The jade emperor would have probably yeeted them out into space 🤣

Absolute chaos

My favorite joke to make about their age gap is that if fans want to yap about the ship between them being problematic, by all means Nezha is the one who should be considered the you know what because that fucker was literally THERE WHEN WUKONG WAS BEING BORN.

Bro their conversations go like;

Wukong: You're such a prick

Nezha: When I was your age-

Wukong: ...

Nezha: -and height

Wukong: KYS!!!

If younger Wukong and younger Nezha had existed at the same time period, the Jade Emperor wouldn't be the only person with problems lmfao 💀 Ao Guang and Jiang Ziya and literally anyone else would be struck by the terror that is them both

Like I just know if younger Wukong was present when younger Nezha was being a menace his ass would've brought a bag of popcorn and go; "y'know what tear his (Ao Guang) spine out too your mom could use a new belt :D"

the only thing that saves the dragons and by extension Jiang Ziya's sanity is fucking what's his name that was Nezha's master chaining them both up or separating them from ever meeting lmfao

[lotusarchon]

Is this a safe enough space for me to say that no matter what variant of Erlang exists as long as I know he's Erlang I'm gonna want him to bend me over a wall and fuck me till his DNA is in my blood?

No?

......

Blows you guys up

[lotusarchon]

how do you think li jing would be if nezha had a mortal s/o? and what are your thoughts on him/gen (i remember you made a rant about him on your old acc but i'd like to hear your thoughts and analysis on him/lh)

Another opportunity for me to ramble? Don't mind if I do 🤭

Be mindful, this is all based on my opinion and observation of Li Jing's character in LMK. You aren't meant to take my word to heart, nor do I disapprove of anyone else's ideas or opinions. Relax.

Regarding a mortal s/o: since we don't know much about Li Jing pre-s5 events, I would think he'd find flaw in anything Nezha did, including his choice in partners. In the grand scheme of things, it really wouldn't matter if Nezha's s/o was a mortal. Immortal, demon, mortal, etc, if they were Nezha's partner, Li Jing would always have a complaint.

Now post s5, I would think he'd be more lenient. I think he'd probably be concerned, actually, because if Nezha's s/o is a mortal of all things, things might only end badly, because well. Nezha's an immortal who will never die, and his partner is mortal and prone to die at many moment. At best, he might advise Nezha not to get too attached for his own sake.

If you're asking about my thoughts on Li Jing, then oh boy buckle up because there's a lot.

Also, be mindful; I'm aware creative liberty exists. When you're taking inspiration from myths and legends, you are allowed to do as you wish. Furthermore, I'm aware that Lego Monkie Kid is catered to an audience that are children, despite the active adult audience, hence why it is the way it is. Don't come to argue with me bringing these up as facts, because I'm stating my opinion while being mindful of these reasons.

1) I think he would've worked better as a villain. When the trailer was first released, I really thought he'd be interesting as a villain. From what I've read of FSSY Li Jing, he gives me the idea of a greedy, ambitious man who would go to lengths for power, aka where he had no remorse when Nezha killed himself. Working with Xiangliu wouldn't seem to far off for him, and I could've seen in the end where he's double-crossed and realizes Xiangliu's true intentions.

2) I don't think he acted as an antagonist in the show. When he first showed up, yeah you'd think he was evil, but aside from placing the circlet on Wukong and attempting to imprison them until things had changed, he didn't seem like a bad guy to me. An asshole yeah, but not a bad guy. MK only sees Li Jing as a bad guy because of the circlet, and Mei saw him as a villain because of his attitude and persistence. Aside from that, I don't think he was a villain, which the fans seems keen on thinking for some reason.

Understand this; Wukong in LMK is most notorious through the celestial realm for causing problems. Unlike in JTTW, he does NOT accept the title of a Buddha, which means we have no idea what he could be up to with no rules to stop him. Yes, we the audience know he's mellowed out, but in world, not many do. Wukong also has a habit of acting impulsively and wrecking things, like we see with his confrontation with Nezha in s3. It's not his fault sometimes yeah, but he does act recklessly, and Li Jing does what he thinks is necessary for the world. That doesn't make him a bad guy, and his attitude is him just doing his job.

3) His (and Nezha's) lack of screentime was disappointing. Even though the show revolves around MK and others, I personally think a scene with Li Jing and Nezha alone, maybe in the celestial realm, would've helped give more insight to his character. He appears to stop the group and then fight later on, and that's it, so all we know about him is a guy doing his duty and was an ass to his son and then suddenly changed.

4) I don't like how he's written in regards to his relationship with Nezha. The sudden switch up in the ending was off-putting, and like I said, the lack of screentime made it harder to decipher their relationship. I know that the writers couldn't potray Li Jing to his FSSY counterpart, and I do understand that Li Jing had his own responsibilities, but Jesus I hated that switch up. It didn't have much impact at all, and it didn't really sell the part of a strict but loving father.

I dunno, I felt like it could've had more impact if Nezha and his dad got enough screentime together for the audience to understand what the relationship was. We don't know how they were before season 5, and we have no idea what LMK might've tried to change with Nezha's origin story, so aside from their interactions, we don't know what to think. Do we still apply FSSY to their story, implying that Li Jing was an abusive father to Nezha in his childhood? Or do we assume this version of Li Jing was simply a father who didn't know how to show affection and was always strict?

5) Li Jing should not have been added. I'm dead serious about this; his entire role feels pointless because aside from doing his duty, why the fuck was he here? I dunno about other fans, but reading JTTW and FSSY, Li Jing placing that circlet on Wukong was not very interesting to me. Also, why the hell was he chosen to handle the Jade Emperor's power, and not someone with close relations to that old geezer, like...you know...ERLANG SHEN!? WHY WAS LI JING HERE HE FELT SO USELESS.

There could've been so many other characters who could've fit into the role Li Jing played. I really don't think he had much of an impact because again, the lack of screentime makes it hard to really understand what his motives lied.

I like Li Jing as a character, but idk. I don't think I'm fond of how Li Jing was portrayed in the series.

Just my opinion though. You guys can think as you'd like of him.

[lotusarchon]

I came from your AO3 fic with Nezha's mom, and it was so heartbreaking:( but I wanna ask, what's the AU about? How does it work in canon exactly with Nezha's mom being alive and all?

I should be upset you came from my AO3 in a funny way, but knowing you came from one of my more serious fics, I guess I'll let my anguish slide.

I'm glad that you thought it was heartbreaking, because that genuinely was the feeling I wanted to have :3 people underestimate my writing because I write smut but nah dawg, I can write serious fics if I wanna. I just don't cause hehe boobs/j

Okay okay I'm done joking lmfao 😔

I wasn't planning on having it as an AU. Originally it was a fic planned by a discussion with a friend, and evidently after asking their opinion on it I went to work. The final bit in the first version where Yin Wuming is alive and in the LMK era wasn't actually supposed to be there, cause I kinda wanted her to be dead and add more trauma for Nezha. But yeah she kinda lived and Nezha met her and yay mom and son reunion

Ummm second fic was the one that settled the idea of Yin Wuming being alive AU..... but I have no idea how tf it goes down. I was thinking her presence was supposed to help Nezha cope especially in s5 where Li Jing makes his appearance, but honestly I have no idea. I just wanted Nezha to have his mom lmfao

As for how it affects canon....I wouldn't think by much. Wuming is alive and it kinda implies that she might've had some dealings with Xiangliu (who I wanted to have a crush with her, but after Li Jing happened, Yin Wuming wouldn't really be too invented in another relationship), and she kinda would've acted as the mediator/telling Li Jing to piss off about how he's treating Nezha, but that's kinda about it. She wouldn't have too much influence on the plot, considering I scrapped the idea of her and Xiangliu actually becoming a couple. Cause, yeah, Wuming's good being single lol

To my memory, there's not many variants of Yin Wuming in media. Maybe that one Nezha 3d movie but not much. I like her enough I just want her to be happy sobs

Additional fact: Wukong was supposed to be shipped with her to 🧍 for no reason but for Nezha to shriek at Wukong "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM MY MOTHER YOU WHORE" 😭😭 idk it was funny but I'm not gonna do that...for Nezha's sanity

[lotusarchon]

Yknow I have this weird strange feeling that the infantalization of Nezha (not even just in lmk anymore☹️) is like 10 times more disrespectful than not believing he’s a permanent child. But hey, what do I know!

Hang on Anon, I'm a lil dumb so I think when you mean the infantilization of Nezha outside of LMK too, you mean the way people treat him as a child compared to people not believing he is a child god?

[small note; author isn't really in a proper thinking space, so his rambling below may not make any sense and holds no actual factual claims aside from his opinion and experience.]

If so, then I agree. While Nezha's age is more discussed in LMK (because I'm not really sure of other media outside of it), in general how he's treated as a deity by Western fans really disgusts me, as someone who once practiced an Asian religion myself.

As far as I know, Cole (not including Over sarcastic Productions or whatever their name is) is the ONLY person who made the statement Nezha is a 6-7/12 year old. I've heard that SEVERAL actual Daoists and Buddhists have come forward to refute him with FACTS of their own, yet not only have Western fans denied them, they also went as far as to doxx and harass them for disagreeing with Cole.

If you ask me my opinion about it? Western fans - I'm referring to the ones who are deadset on Nezha being a child god, not in general - cannot handle the idea they're wrong. They perceive Chinese people as innocent and not knowing any better, and they blatantly fetishize the culture for reasons I'm not even understanding of. They can't handle that they're wrong in their way of thinking, and I'm certain that they don't want too. Why would they? If they have to admit Nezha's a child, then they'll also lose their idea that Chinese people aren't soft uwu children but instead grown adults who are capable of thinking for themselves. If you know about Genshin Impact and the recent characters from Sumeru and Natlan, you can see it for yourself and the amount of blatant excuses used.

I know chronically online people exist, but there's something so disgusting about this headcanon about Nezha as a god's age. I'm not referring to any fandoms here, I mean Nezha himself as a deity, who's been worshipped for decades longer than the internet has existed.

My friend mentioned that the reason there's so much debate about his age is because he's by far the only god (to my knowledge) known to be worshipped as a child and an adult, but I don't think so. That's an excuse to weaponize incompetence and stupidity if you ask me. Ignorance is not an excuse to be disrespectful about a religion, and furthermore, it truly is only Western fans that are so defensive about Nezha being a child. I've only seen Eastern (?) fans who are involved to point out the misinformation, but not much else.

Again, this is merely a personal opinion of mine, but Western fans infantilize Nezha because they fetishize Chinese culture in general. It's much similar to those weeboos who yap and yap about Japan because of anime but not much else.

In my opinion, Nezha's their outlet into thinking Chinese people are innocent little creatures. Forcing them to acknowledge he's an adult means you have to acknowledge in the first place Chinese people aren't children.

It's kinda like how weeaboos (I forgot the term) will see Japan as the land of anime and cute polite people, yet they refuse to learn about the world wars and Japan's part in it because it'll ruin the image of an innocent group of people that creates their favorite anime or manga.

I might be ceaselessly rambling here, but really if you think about it, I don't think I'm too far off. I've seen it for myself- as a matter of fact, I've EXPERIENCED it. When I was a kid (9-10) that got into anime I didn't think a country like Japan would do anything like that either. When I got into History and started learning about world wars, I was horrified and didn't feel like continuing. That doesn't mean I haven't change, and now I'm completely numb to it, but that's pretty much how it is with some people.

People will argue that not treating him as an immortal child is disrespectful, but personally, INSISTING he's a child is FAR MORE disrespectful because HE IS NOT A FICTIONAL CHARACTER TO PLACE A HEADCANON ON. IF AN ACTUAL DAOIST/BUDDHIST POINTS OUT THEIR GOD IS NOT A CHILD DEITY, THEN HE IS NOT.

Nezha as a god is NOT something you can place a headcanon on. Stop acting like you know better, because you don't. If you aren't Chinese or Daoist, then respectfully, shut your mouth about the affairs regarding Asian religion, because it's invalid as fuck.

[lotusarchon]

been rereading svsss soooo combining my current hyperfixations here

everytime there's a reader isekai au it's always them loving the universe they've transmigrated into but what about a reader who's a borderline HATER (me) of black myth wukong or lego monkie kid

(tdlr: this does not represent how i feel about either video game and show, because i like them both, the fandoms are just...eh...but i do think it'll be funny lmfao)

i'm talking a full time hater. they've read jttw and fssy and of COURSE they love those books, they're a huge myth nerd.

then they take one fucking look at the adaptions inspired by them and immediately go "oh fuck no"

a reader who DESPISES lmk's portrayal of sun wukong because what the fuck do you mean he's not a buddhist after his journey? what do you mean he didn't kick the jade emperor's ass and fucking isn't badass and cool? what the fuck do you mean the six eared macaque is his 'best friend' and people SHIP them?? what do you mean no one likes tripitaka and apparently the three other pilgrims were reincarnated when that isn't factually correct??

a reader who positively despises the plot line in lmk because WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN NEZHA'S DEMOTED TO SOME CANON FODDER WHEN HE SHOULD BE BADASS?? or...or AZURE LION BEATING THE JADE EMPEROR?? WHO THE FUCK EVEN IS THE BROTHERHOOD EWWW!? what do you mean this dragon girl has the samadhi fire ew ew ewww what is this plot...

reader who fights with fans because of their (barf) mindset and also shut?? up?? about nezha being a 12 year old?? gross ass??

reader who watches the show religiously but only to find every flaw in it and when people argue about the show being a children's only audience they fight back with "idgaf if it's for kids they should teach it properly dumb fucking cunts gtfo my dms before i doxx you"

same thing with black myth wukong tbh. reader who hates black myth wukong because...no...no, sun wukong most certainly wouldn't do that. graphics are fine whatever but but this is?? inaccurate??

reader who's tearing into fanboys too because shut the fuck up about this character pingping bring sexy and also why the fuck does she exist?? why is red son not actually pif's son?? why is there some fucking random monkey tryna collect those whatchamacallit (relics) NO THIS IS WRONG

reader who's gagging cause...sun wukong wasn't in love with nobody and why is there a brief fucking romance plotline with the monkey 2.0 wasn't this a fighting game ewew get it AWAAAAY

reader who hates and then...uh oh. too much dumplings is making them choke....guys...guys i think they're dying??

reader who wakes up in bmw or lmk as some... rabbit spirit? (so weird) but absolutely SEETHING at being here because oh fuck this bitch ass god awful plot suck my cock we are NOT DOING THIS

reader deciding that avoiding the obnoxious characters would definitely be better for their sanity....only for some blasted loud ass obnoxious stupid cunt fucking google translated voice pings in their head... telling them if they don't participate in the plot they'll be executed

reader thinking they'd rather die but then the system goes "oh, you thought we were joking?" and gives them the worst experience ever that by the end of it they have to swallow their pride and participate in the plot....☹️ Unfortunately

reader who accidentally wifes up the characters and has to deal with everyone forgetting their roles...and the system threatening them about the plot too like bro how is this my fault these bitches are dumb? fuck you mean you're gonna kill me ag- no, no, you're right uh i'll fix it i'll fix it.

Anyways I'm gonna write a fanfic with an OC like this cause it's too funny to pass up and also I'm 100% gonna die with my wipes hahahaha fuck..

[lotusarchon]

hot to go (nezha x reader)

content warnings: trans-masc reader (he/them pronouns used), rabbit spirit reader, second pov (you/your), racer/racing au, modern-ish au, fssy characters mentioned, weird plot, kidnapping attempt gone wrong, self indulgent, smut/nsfw warning - minors/ageless blogs dni, outdoor sex, cowgirl, oral (m receiving)

author's notes: save me racer nezha, save me

Just focus on the race. The track is all yours.

“Yo, Nezhie! Good luck buddy! You're gonna need it! Not for the other racers though. From me, haha. Okay, I'm gone now, byeeeee~!”

….

Li Nezha was a popular racer. Going from barely remembered in his rookie days to the current moment that everyone in the racing world was aware of his name, and the title he had been graced with ― the Lotus Prince. He who was above all ‘worldly desires’, expressing a profound commitment to his racing career. If it wasn't obvious enough from the sleek design and commitment to his car, the extra care given to his racing suit, then perhaps the countless offers from different sponsors, each one more determined and desperate than the last, to have him as the show of their fortune, should've been visible proof of his ever growing talent and power.

His arrogance and cockiness was irritating to his fellow racers, crew and even family members, that was a given. None enjoyed having to deal with an arrogant prick ― a person who spoke insulting words with false kindness, someone who always wore a fake smile and who cared little who's feelings he crushed, friend or foe.

Lotus Prince was the title he was given on the racetrack, but behind closed doors, arrogant prick was a generous if not kind title.

He was a ‘one-man’ show as the rumours went, and if it was possible, he most likely would've long since abandoned his crew. The one, sole reason anyone was willing to put up with him, either on the pit or as his driver, was because of his sweet, gentle golden retriever of a brother, Jinzha, who had inherited the family's business and his father's legacy. Said father had also been incredibly unhappy with Nezha's choice in careers, but since no amount of beatings and nights without dinners worked, he wiped his hands of this unfilial child and gave up on him.

He wanted to race so badly!? So be it! It wasn't his (Li Jing’s) life that was being thrown away anyway! Ha!

With a slight twitch of his eye, Nezha's hands clenched around his steering wheel.

Against other racers, Nezha was always certain to come out on top, even in his rookie years, stealing the title of racing champion to whoever it first belonged to.

At least, until recently, when he was promoted to go up against the Monkey King ― that Sun Wukong who was all but a cocky rookie, yet still managed to win more races than Nezha ever could.

What a damn monkey indeed. Second place had been given to Nezha, again, and again, and―

“The Monkey King takes the lead once again!”

“Son of a bi―”

***

“Whoa, buddy. Ya look pink.”

Mentally, Nezha countered to ten. His brother had always insisted that if he couldn't control his temper, at least give himself some sort of countdown to relax and think rationally.

It was bullshit. Counting didn't help him relax, it only made him itch to hit the person who thought this method was remotely helpful to begin with.

With an agitated huff, Nezha raised his head to the man―er, monkey?―who came to irritate him with that stupid remark.

Of course he looked pink. Nezha was probably the only racer who was man enough to not give a fuck that his signature colors were…pink. His car, his racing suit, hell, even the ribbons that he wore were colored pink.

To be honest about 70% of Nezha's fans were women, and one only needed a mere glance at him to know why.

He was the epitome of a pretty boy: jade white skin, thick lashes and full lips tinted pink from his constant gnawing, and many often wondered what he would look like of he just smiled. A sharp jawline and dark eyes that reflected none of his true emotions, and his hair tied into twin buns, styled with girlish looking ribbons. When he wore his helmet, strands would occasionally slip from the style, but it only served to make him look more appealing to his fans.

Naturally, it should be common knowledge―forget about the color, no man alive would dare to step outside their house looking like that, nevermind allow pictures to surface and plaster across billboards and the like. The fact was, an even rarer 10% of those remaining thirty percent of his fans were actually straight men, and even they at times couldn't bring themselves to admit they were diehard fans of this pretty-boy racer, who may as well have been better off playing the role of some prince or something in a xianxia setting.

Sighing, Nezha rubbed the crease in his forehead that always seemed to appear whenever Wukong was within sight. His temple throbbed as he answered, “Can you take your silly jokes and gloat somewhere else? Weren't you supposed to be partying with Yang Jian?”

That Yang Jian, in question, was either Wukong's boyfriend or close friend. Whatever the relationship was mattered little to Nezha ― the farther away Wukong was from him, the easier life would be.

Unfortunately, this monkey was as smart as a koala bear. The lousy grin he wore widened, and he promptly sat himself down on the back of Nezha's car, designed with white lotus flowers and his title.

Nezha felt his eyelid twitched.

“You know, I'm really just concerned about ya,” he said cheerily, swinging his legs back and forth. “I mean, you should've seen your face when you hit second place today. You looked like someone had just fucked your mom!”

Nezha listened to his inner voice and grabbed a wrench from one of his mechanics.

“I mean, damn. I know you hate losing to me but could you really not have expected it? I'm me, and you're, well, you. So I don't really see why―” He suddenly paused, his eyes on the wrench Nezha clenched. “Why do you have that.”

“....”

After much shrieking and a comical chase, Nezha retired inside his trailer for the day. His next race was supposed to be held in Donghai, which was at least a few days worth of driving. The sooner he got there, the less chances of him running into that annoying monkey.

The fantasy of not hearing Wukong yap in his head was enough to withdraw a rare, barely there smile. One that would've made his driver―his annoying brother Muzha―stare at him in terror, or his fangirls squeal with glee, to be given the knowledge that their cold, unreachable lotus could smile.

He settled back against the seats, staring boredly through the windows with an unreadable expression.

A knock from the driver's seat roused him from his daydreams. He spared it a brief glance, meeting a face that could've been carved of the same mold as Li Jing's had it not been for the slight delicate softness inherited from their mother's.

Nezha squinted.

“Ge wants to know if you wanna give any of your friends a few tickets,” Muzha deadpanned from where he sat, his gaze focused on the road before him. “Speak quick, I don't have time, and neither does he.”

Of course he didn't. Jinzha was always so busy, yet still attempting to make time for his brothers.

Nezha thought and sighed.

Tickets for what friends? Most of the people Nezha worked with tolerated him for the promise of money, or for Jinzha. Arrogance was what he was known for, and to be honest, he never allowed anyone the chance to get too close.

He wasn't so caught up in his own ego, like a certain Monkey King. He was more than aware of his own unlikable personality, and thus knew better than to try or pretend, instead dedicating his life to his racing.

Checking his neatly trimmed nails, picking at the faint nail polish left behind, Nezha merely hummed.

“Tell him not to bother. I don't need support anyway.”

From the driver's seat, all he heard was a snort from Muzha, before he finally fell silent.

***

Nezha had only rested his eyes for a few minutes, yet when he reopened then again, almost three hours had passed.

He yawned, grumbling as he sat up to rub the sleep from his eyes. Outside, the moon was high in the sky, and so the passing scenery was mixed in a passing blur and darkness, lit only by the occasional streetlight.

For a split second, he was mildly concerned. As much as he disliked his older brother, that wooden prick, there was no way he could keep driving without rest. Even if he desperately itched to arrive at Donghai in time, if Muzha fell asleep at the wheel and an accident happened, it wouldn't end well for either parties.

Resolutely, Nezha leaned over, knocking on the front compartment that opened to the driver's seat.

“Muzha?” He called out, a slight frown to his expression. “Hey? You know you can stop, right? If you crash, the one who's being blamed is me.”

A pause. There was no answer, only the gentle driving that continued.

Nezha hesitated.

“Fine. I won't stop you. But don't blame me either if something happens.” Another pause. “Get some rest too. Good night.”

Fuck.

Nezha knew something had been off when he woke up properly the next morning, squinting at the bright sunlight that threatened his vision. He must've been lying on the bare ground, to be in this position, and thanked his stars the jacket he wore was padded to avoid the feeling of gravel pressing into his back.

He squirmed, discovering that his hands had been tied in front of him, and sighed.

Honestly. He'd have to be an idiot to not recognize the situation he had been placed in.

With a huff, he tried to make an attempt to roll onto his side. There was much difficulty, but in the end, he found himself leverage, and was finally able to sit up and examine his surroundings (after his eyes had adjusted to the sudden brightness).

What he first noticed was that his trailer, thank the heavens, was parked nearby, and didn't seem to have been dealt any damage. There was no sign of his brother however, and that made his relief become gnawing guilt as he examined the rest of his surroundings.

A long gravelled road, with some sort of rickety fence that stopped for a few short miles, at least from what he could see. Either side overlooked what might've been dunes, miniature at best compared to the ones he had seen on another trip, but sandy dunes all the same, and flat exposed rock that seemed to glimmer from the sun beating down upon them.

For all his pretty boy appearances, Nezha wasn't exactly a stranger to the rough outdoors. His childhood was spent froclicking wherever he could, and tearing a dragon's sinew from it's body. If he reached into his pockets, he could still feel the remains there, rubbery and often used as a past time for him to turn into different patterns between his fingertips. Soft and princely he might've been, and with smooth, gentle hands that could've been a woman's, Nezha was as much at home in this blistering weather as he was in the racetrack.

That didn't make him any less happier, however. Briefly, he contemplated summoning his sash tied around his belt, when he spotted two figures emerging from the back of his trailer. They took no notice of him, so Nezha took it upon himself to stare as much as he could.

One was a man much taller, with a bushy bear and long flowing hair tied into a low ponytail. With only a mere side view, there wasn't much for Nezha to go off on, aside that he wore loose, black robes in this hot as hell weather. He faced a smaller figure who bounced in place, but at least looked like someone from the modern century.

Nezha stared, taken aback by the fluffy black ears that twitched on their head. Most animal demons or spirits in this day and age hid any sign of their true forms behind a glamor, not a part of them revealed to be an animal. Even Sun Wukong in this day and age had opted for an appearance that though still stood out, was enough to hide his true form from unwanted remarks.

Even their fluffy bobtail, which Nezha barely spotted from the pastel pink jacket they wore around their waist, was in sight.

A rabbit spirit? He blinked. They've got guts showing up like that, I'd give them that.

They also had the guts to try and capture him of all people, but for now, Nezha wouldn't dwell on it. At the very least, this spirit was at least dressed comparably decent, in loose, white clothing in this warm weather.

And appearances aside, Nezha couldn't tell if the latter was male, or female. Their voice, which was a mix of a high-pitched whine and feverish garbling, was androgynous at best.

“Honestly….” The older man interrupted the rabbit spirit's indecipherable speech. “How does one find themselves in such a mess…..your Qiu-mei will not be pleased.”

Huh. They must've recognized him then, and clearly had much regrets. Good that they did, and Nezha with a pleased conscience, decided not to attack them yet.

“I’m sorry.” The rabbit spirit wrung their hands nervously. Their ears twitched rapidly, and Nezha was mildly amused by the sight. “I didn't mean too…i-it just kinda happened.”

“....(Name), how does one happen to kidnap a racer and mistake him as their target!?”

So their name was that, huh. Mumbling the name to himself, Nezha continued to eavesdrop to pass the time.

(Name) burst into tears, still wringing their hands. “It really was an accident!!” They whined out, fidgeting in place. “It was so dark outside! I just jumped at the first trailer I saw outside….”

Nezha finally understood.

This, for some ironic reason, had genuinely been some sort of accident. Muzha must've stopped somewhere after Nezha had fallen asleep, for a small break to rest his eyes. The designated area he'd chosen was a seedy gas stop, but while he was busy at the counter, this (Name) person mistook their vehicle as some other target of theirs, and had stepped inside.

And now that they'd realized their error, they clearly were about to faint on the spot.

Luckily, the older black-robed man caught them, stuck between laughing and sighing.

“Okay, okay, relax―” The older man chided, patting the smaller figure's back. “Just breathe, alright? I'm sure we can work this out…probably….”

Nezha didn't know if he should laugh, or cry. The knowledge his brother was at the very least safe soothed his temper, but at the same time, knowing these people were criminals was enough to make him grimace. Accidents were…excusable, but on purpose…that went against everything he stood for, arrogance be damned.

Unable to keep up with their mindless banter, Nezha cleared his throat―loud enough to catch their attentions. The rabbit jolted with surprise, but the darkly-dressed man simply spared him a glance. Nezha caught the sight of a scraggly beard and dark eyes, but what stood out to him was the familiarity.

“Shen Gongbao.” The name fell off his lips with a bitter taste to his tongue.

The centuries old Taoist spared him a lecherous grin. “His Highness, the Third Lotus Prince. Nice to see you again. You lost the baby fat from your face―couldn’t recognize ya’ for a sec.”

Nezha rolled his eyes at the remark. Next to the Taoist, the rabbit was flailing their hands, attempting to stop their accomplice from talking. Shen Gongbao merely waved them off, still smiling at the racer bound and tied on the road.

“Huh. Always wondered where you and the others disappeared off too.” Shen Gongbao toyed with his beard and took slow, calculated steps towards him. Up close, Nezha could spy grey strands mixing with his dark hair.

So he got older too.

“Don't see why that matters to you,” he retorted back, and flicked his gaze to the bouncing rabbit spirit. For whatever reason there was, they seemed at least able to recognize him if the dark flush to their freckled cheeks was anything to go off by. They bit their thumbs and stood in the same spot, bouncing on their heels with a look of anxiety in their eyes. “Besides. Aren't you too old now, pulling this type of nonsense?”

Shen Gongbao simply pouted. “And aren't you too old to be having such a sour attitude? Honestly, how did you manage to become a racer? And such a popular one too?” He reached out, pinching Nezha's dusty cheek. There was now little distance between them, and the faint smell of sweet liquor filled Nezha's senses and made his eyelid twitch.

“Don't tell me.” Nezha winced when the Taoist finally released his possibly red, swollen cheek. “You weren't happy with what Jiang Ziya gave you, so you decided to terrorize everyone else. How very….” He struggled to find the correct word.

“Demure?” The rabbit spirit piped up from where they sat.

“(Name), do be quiet.”

“Sorry….”

“.....” Nezha exhaled. “Just what the hell are you planning on doing with me? I don't have all the time in the world to be wasted on the likes of you and your little pet.”

Shen Gongbao snorted. “I find that highly unlikely, little prince.”

“And I'm not his pet!” The rabbit quipped again, earning another sigh from their master. “Master Shen, I'm not! Tell him I'm not!”

“Of course you aren't (Name).” The Taoist stood. “But why waste our words on a dead man? Don't get so upset, he's not worth our time.”

Nezha's brows furrowed slightly. Did this guy seriously think they could just kill him just like that? Sure, his skills were a little rusty, but―

“Um….we can't kill him.” The rabbit, no, (Name), looked mildly upset as Shen Gongbao took a swig from his flask he must've kept hiding in his sleeves. “I mean. Well….. isn't there something else we can do? Like sending him back?”

Maybe this rabbit had the right head on their shoulders.

“Um. No.”

And maybe he should've used that brick of his on Shen Gongbao when he had the chance instead of listening to Jiang Ziya’s nonsensical babbling.

“Why not!?”

“(Name). Your Qiu-mei would hit you if she heard you speak.” The Taoist rubbed his forehead. “You don't…kidnap people and then just return them. He knows too much and isn't our target, so we have to get rid of him without our secrets being leaked.”

The rabbit blinked. “He's rich and people would pay a lot to have him back and alive.”

Nezha nodded. For as dumb as they appeared to be, it seemed that they were quite smart for whatever age they were. It benefited him, because then he wouldn't have to lift a finger in restraining these villains until the last second.

Shen Gongbao’s thick brows looked like they wanted to frown harder. He spared Nezha a glance and stood, dusting the gravel and stone that clung to his thick robes.

“My little A-Lan,” the Taoist said, his tone gentle and laced with kindness, like when a parent was trying to deliver bad news to a toddler. “Your….admiration for the prince is showing. Look at him―do you think any honest woman would want to be near him? Nevermind anyone in general. He's a prick.”

The rabbit’s lips pursed slightly.

Nezha looked offended where he sat.

“Um. I most certainly would be missed,” he deadpanned from where he sat.

Shen Gongbao spared him a look. “Would you really?”

“Yes. I'm quite famous you know.”

The rabbit nodded. “He is, Master.”

“(Name), shush. My point still remains. You're arrogant and haughty. It's not an issue about holding you for ransom. It's simply that you aren't worth anything, and no one would be willing to pay the price to get you back.”

“Um.” The rabbit tried again. “But we can't kill him. That's…I mean, it's not really nice….”

The older man looked like he wanted to roll his own eyes, but fought back the temptation to flash the rabbit a small, fond smile. It seemed, by their dynamic, that this was not something new, and Nezha felt a little disappointed that he was not the exception to this sympathy.

“You and Qiuyue are far too different.” Shen Gongbao heaved a sigh and tugged on the rabbit's fluffy ear. “Perhaps it is for the best.” He spared Nezha another glance, and continued, “Fine, then. If you don't want for me to kill him, then we'll go with your plan.”

***

When Shen Gongbao had asked for your plan in sending Nezha back without either of you getting caught, you blurted out the first thing that came to mind. Yet, who would've guessed―not only did he have you take control, he left the racer in your hands.

It's totally fine, he had said. He sealed Nezha's meridians away, so he couldn't get away from the cables tied around him. No big deal!

It was in fact a big deal. Nezha's face might've been soft and pretty, but his body did not match that delicateness. He could crush you to death with one hand alone! The fuck!? Did your master not see the size of those things!? And he expected you to watch him!?

Hahaha, what the fuck!?

“You're telling me you don't know how to drive?” He deadpanned from the driver's seat, his free hands clenching the steering wheel. His expression was blank, if not unamused, and he seemed itch to roll his eyes. “How on earth did you even steal it to begin with?”

You flushed with shame, staring at the dashboard in front of you.

The truth was, you barely managed to steal his trailer that night. It was genuinely pure luck you had managed to keep it from driving on the road without attracting attention.

Nezha continued on, “What kind of kidnapper has their own hostage doing the driving? That's pretty lame, isn't it?”

You covered your face in shame, your ears drooping.

“Please, no more. I can't take it anymore,” you managed out, fighting back tears of shame.

Whether or not he felt any sympathy, he wouldn't say, but at least his insults stopped for the time. His gaze remained focus on the road before him, his lips pursed.

Arguably, you might've been decades younger than your cousin and master, but at least that meant you had more common sense than they did. Sure, you were probably useless for a lot of things with your anxiety always ready to skyrocket, but at least your first thought hadn't been to murder a guy because he was the wrong target.

And to be honest, you did like Nezha a lot. You might even dare to call yourself one of his fans, but that would be a bit much. His pretty boy looks were the only things you really liked, because racing was a boring sport to you, and you didn't understand anything related to it. Ignoring that Nezha's personality was also ass.

With a sigh, you propped your hand under your cheek to stare out the window. If Nezha did, and he most likely would, try to turn you in to the authorities, you could always just make a run for it. Just as long as he returned home safe….

A few hours passed before Nezha finally spoke again.

“Where are we going?”

You blinked.

“You…you're the one who's doing the driving!?”

“Yeah, and you brought me here.” Nezha glanced at you. “Shouldn't you at least be able to tell what direction we're in?”

“....”

Shen Gongbao was the one who asked you to meet him here, but that didn't mean you knew where here was. It was the middle of nowhere as far as you could tell, and when you'd dragged Nezha inside the trailer sometime later, your master hadn't told you that you might've been heading in the wrong direction.

Not to mention, you didn't think you would've gotten lost. Nezha was a driver, so surely he should've been able to tell where you were heading??

Fuck.

“Oh my god we're lost.”

“You're fucking with me.”

Nezha groaned, banging his head against the steering wheel. You panicked when the trailer swerved, but it didn't crash into anything unassuming, and Nezha muttered another curse under his breath before regaining his bearings. He glowered at the open road, his brows twitching.

You gulped nervously.

“I'm supposed to be in Donghai in three days!” He muttered out, digging his nails into the steering wheel. “And I can't believe I got kidnapped by Bugs Bunny and his fucking evil wizard accomplice.”

You processed his words, and gaped. “Who are you calling Bugs Bunny, you…you fucking….”

Nezha raised a brow. “Go on.”

“....” You looked away and pouted. Finding an insult that would hurt was too hard. You should've listened to Qiuyue when you had the chance. “I'm not a Bug's Bunny.”

“Could've fooled me then, Lola Bunny.”

“Okay, stop.”

The trailer came to a stop on the side of the road. Nezha couldn't keep driving forever, and because you were useless in driving and couldn't take turns at the wheel, he had no choice but to stop for a break, even when he would much rather keep driving until daybreak the next day.

He sat at the edge of his cot, watching you try to figure out how to pry the sink open without breaking anything.

“You're a bad kidnapper,” he commented, picking at the last bits of nail polish on his fingers. He frowned, looking around for the bottle he'd had tucked away somewhere. “Like. Seriously. What kind of kidnapper just grabs someone without knowing how to drive? Much less do anything in general?”

“It was an accident.” You gave up on the sink, choosing to look through the cupboards instead for anything of nutritional value. All your hands could find were bowls of lotus seeds, covered to prevent spilling over. You stared at the several bowls lined up neatly in the cupboard, and deadpanned.

Well….lotus seeds it would have to be, then. Though you really wished you could find meat….at least you wouldn't have to cook it.

You grabbed a bowl and faced Nezha, taken aback by the sight of him sitting cross legged and painting his nails a fresh layer of pastel pink that matched his car's designs.

He glanced your way, cocking a brow. “What?”

“Nothing…” You shook your head, taking the empty spot next to him. “Um. I found this….if you're hungry….”

Wait….wasn't he reborn from a lotus root? You glanced at him nervously. Would it count as cannibalism if he ate them―

“Feed me.”

“Pardon?”

Nezha sighed. All of his attention remained on painting his nails with precision, and he barely even spared you the energy of an eye roll. He stuck his tongue out, examining his index finger in the trailer light, and made a gesture with his free, unpainted hand.

“You're pardoned. And I said, feed me. I'm busy.”

“...” You picked at one of the seeds, your ear twitching. Perhaps Shen Gongbao had been right. With an attitude like that, did he even have friends? Or, if he somehow magically had any, how did they tolerate him this much?

Begrudgingly accepting your role, you placed a lotus seed to his lips. Though distracted, his teeth latched onto it with ease, and you watched with awe as it disappeared into his mouth.

Well, you were already bored anyway. Might as well make a game of how fast he could eat and swallow lotus seeds.

“Stop staring.”

“Oh.”

***

Two days had passed, and unfortunately, you were both still very lost. There was an occasional gastop and settlements on the road the longer Nezha kept driving, but neither had been helpful with directions. Either because they sensed you were a spirit and they were awfully superstitious, or because Nezha's not too-pleasant attitude and expression scared almost everyone into fainting on the spot.

You didn't have the heart to ask the lotus prince to try to be nicer. If you did, he would probably go back to calling you those mean names again. He had stopped after reducing you to tears once, but you weren't very eager to remind him. Creative as they were, you did not enjoy being at the receiving end of those insults.

Maybe he was just a sadist.

Unsurprisingly, Nezha did not take pleasure in driving for this long. After your most recent gas stop, he ended up stopping the trailer in an empty grazing field. You sat with newly acquired snacks to watch him drive his race car around, kicking up dust and scaring the local wildlife in the process.

You couldn't make heads or tails of whatever he was doing, but when he drove past, you did manage to catch sight of his expression. For once, he seemed genuinely happy to be there, behind the steering wheel of his stupid car, driving repeated circles in the same tire tracks until he was tired.

It might've been a trick of the light, but you could've sworn you saw a faint smile on his lips.

“Honestly,” you spoke to one of the rabbits that hopped closer to the blanket you sat on. “He seems like a nice guy in the field. Is it that hard for him to place that same energy into talking to people?”

The rabbit twitched its nose at you.

“I mean. Qiuyue is always complaining about people being unchangeable.” You threw a lotus seed at the rabbit. “But it's…not fair, is it? People can change! And, I dunno. He's lived decades longer than I have, but doesn't seem to have anyone to really be there for him, does he? Outside of his brothers, I mean.”

“...”

“Ugh.” You groaned and allowed yourself to fall back onto the grass beneath you. “I'm going mad.”

“Yeah, you are.”

You glowered at the familiar face hovering above you, a smirk curling on those lips that you had gotten used to staring at in the two days you spent with him.

He was right, at least. You were a horrible kidnapper. I mean, who let's their hostage drive around knowing damn well they could escape if they wanted too!? Qiuyue would have your head if she saw you as you were now.

Nezha extended a gloved hand towards you, and you accepted it, allowing him to pull you up with ease. His car was parked near the trailer, and as he sat himself next to you, you couldn't help but spare him one more glance. The sweat beading down his temples, the slight motion of his chest as he caught his breath, his ruffled hair and the strands that escaped his bun….

You sighed as he stole another bowl of lotus seeds, propping your hands behind you.

Don't misunderstand ― you most certainly was not falling for a guy you met only for two days. This wasn't a cheesy romcom to begin with.

But, you'd be lying if you said you weren't mildly…atttacted to him.

“Why were you talking to yourself?” Nezha asked between a mouthful of seeds.

“I was talking to my rabbit friend.”

He blinked, giving you a weird look between stuffing seeds into his mouth. “So you can….communicate with them?”

“No….”

“...”

“Oh. You're really weird then.”

“It's not weird! I was just talking out loud! How is that weird!? Stop looking at me like that! Hey!” You gasped as he snickered, grabbing him by the arm. “Stop laughing! I'm not weird! It's not! Don't you talk to yourself all the time!? Stop laughing!!!”

There was nothing you could do about it. With a snort, Nezha's free hand grabbed your wrist, pulling you forward, if only to grin at your embarrassed expression.

“But it's funny,” he insisted, watching you squirm. “You're the only person I've ever met insane enough to talk to a rabbit. I have to laugh.”

“You! You're so horrible.” You gave up, slouching on his lap. Maybe if you stayed incredibly still, you could pretend to be dead. “I was just pointing something out…”

Too bad Nezha didn't want to follow with your pretense. He set his now empty bowl aside, both hands free to do as they pleased. With your front on his lap, he placed his hands on your back, and casually grabbed at the fluffball that was your tail.

“I heard.” He squeezed the soft fur experimentally, ignoring how you twitched and tried to pull back. “While I appreciate your concern, it is as you've said. I've lived for centuries, I don't think I need anyone else to be there for me. It's pointless.”

You gave up on escaping and prayed for your tail. The legends of how Nezha tore out the dragon king's son's spine and was probably still playing with the sinew made you mentally sob.

“But it's not nice being alone, is it?” You tried to look at him. “I mean…even gods get lonely every once in a while. Isn't that why they like to visit humans?”

Nezha caught your gaze, and a small, barely visible smile adorned his expression. The hand not occupied with your tail pinched your chubby cheek.

“But being lonely is far better than pointless attachments,” he pointed out, leaving your cheek to tug your ear. “A god lives forever. Eventually, you'll learn that it's better to simply be as you are, and to depend on no one but yourself.”

“Is it because you've been hurt before, or that you'd rather not take the risk of being hurt ever?”

He paused, and released your tail. “The latter.”

“Oh.”

Without his hand on your tail, you managed to roll yourself onto your back, staring up at him. He stared back a blank expression, and you frowned, wanting to say something.

“.....do you wanna fuck?”

Nezha choked and shoved you off his lap. Which, come to think of it, really was well deserved. Who asks that question with a straight face, after having a conversation like that!? The fact he didn't try to kill you was mercy in itself, but you didn't exactly think of that while staring at the way his face seemed to flush and grow pink in color to the tips of his ears.

You picked yourself up, dusting the grass that had stuck to your pants. Nezha blinked.

“Um…what the fuck?”

“Qiuyue told me that in awkward situations like that, relief helps with the tension.” You held up a finger. “And I mean. We're stuck here for a bit. Might as well make the most of it.”

Nezha didn't know if he should laugh or cry. In all his years of living, he had never heard anything more ridiculous, and very tempting.

“....very well….I guess. We can um. Try.”

You gave him a thumbs up. “Yay!”

“Don't do that.”

“Oh.”

With how shy and bouncy you were, Nezha thought you would've wanted to do this….thing, you suggested, behind the walls of the trailer for privacy.

Yet instead, you insisted that you stay outdoors. For what reason, he couldn't tell, and he lost all thoughts of questioning you when your warm hands wrapped around the base of his cock and slowly pumped your hand.

Nezha's breath hitched, his hands clenching the blanket he sat upon to leverage himself. His bottom lip worried between his teeth, and his face burned ever so warmly when your warmth breath brushed against his sensitive tip, flushed an angry red, the slit slowly leaking precum from your ministrations. Your tongue dragged against his weeping tip, leaving him fisting the blanket and his hips instinctively bucking against you.

You raised your head slightly, blinking up at his blushing experience, and as if an afterthought struck you, you gently patted his thigh.

“Don't worry, I'll be nice,” you assured him with a smile.

Shouldn't I be saying that to you?

If he wanted to respond, he had no chance to do so. His teeth sunk into the tender skin of his lip, and a strangled moan managed to escape through gritted teeth when your mouth enveloped his cock, your lips sucking at his tip and the warmth of your tongue dragging against his slit.

His tip kissed the back of your throat, and your hands clenched at his bare thighs, forming crescent shaped cuts from your nails. You glanced up at him through your lashes, and Nezha couldn't bare to keep eye contact for long. He squeezed his eyes shut, hissing as you began to bob your head against his length.

You could feel him throbbing, yet for some reason or the other, the Lotus Prince remained stubborn in his actions. He refused to even look at you, despite the red blush spreading to his neck, or the fact he was trying so hard not to buck his hips with every swirl of your tongue.

Honestly….

Your nose pressed against his pelvis, and Nezha choked, his hand flying to your head. His fingers laced through your hair that had fallen from its ponytail, gently tugging and fisting the strands when you hollowed your cheeks and dragged your tongue against the underside of his shaft. He twitched and groaned, his chest heaving with his shallow pants.

His cock throbbed in the cavern of your mouth, and you allowed yourself to pull back, his cock slipping from your mouth with a slick noise. Saliva clung to his tip, and your hand, breaking the strand that connected his tip to your lips, stroked him to completion. You could feel his hand tugging at your hair, his head falling back with a quiet moan as he came in your hand, his cum coating your wrist in sticky, wet spurts.

You sat up, allowing him to catch his breath. His hair must've come undone at some point, and the strands of silky black hair draped his face like a curtain. The redhue spread across his nose, and he gazed at you through hooded, glossy eyes.

“Well?” You looked around for something to wipe your hand on. “That felt nice, didn't it? Now, you can feel better about yourself.”

Nezha frowned, using his elbows to push himself up. “That's it?”

“Hm?”

“That's….” He trailed off, clenching and unclenching his hand. “You…um. I mean, is there not another….”

He was looking at you again, but not quite at your face. Intrigued, you followed his gaze, lower―

“Pervert!”

“What!?” He choked. “How am I the pervert!? You just sucked my dick!”

“And!?”

“W-well, I thought that….you uh…”

“....”

“....”

“Fine.”

“Yay!”

“WHY IS IT FINE WHEN YOU DO IT!?”

You refused to lie on your back, and Nezha was adamantly stubborn, so in the end, you both compromised, and thus was your position. On one hand, you figured you didn't want to complain, but on the other….you really did not do well with prolonged eye contact. You almost wished you'd accepted his offer to do it on the grass instead….

Nezha's hands squeezed the soft flesh of your ass, guiding your hips to meet with his upward thrusts. His brows were furrowed in deep concentration, though you had to wonder why he chose to stare at your exposed breasts instead of anywhere else.

“You're…you're a…” He briefly looked up to catch your flushed gaze.

“Um. I'm a guy.” You deadpanned at his surprise. Was it not obvious from the beginning? “Did you not know this?”

Nezha blinked as if realization dawned on him. His lips parted to make a remark, but then he immediately snapped them shut, burying his face between your plush tits abruptly. You gasped when you felt his lips latch onto your nipple, his teeth teasing the sensitive skin.

The action caused your cunt to abruptly clench around him, a whimper escaping you, mixed with another moan when his cock brushed against a sensitive spot inside you that made your toes curl and your entire body tremble.

One of his hands slowly crept upward, against the curve of your ass, until it found your fluffy tail. His nails scratched against the base connected to your back, and then he tugged in time with another bite to your sensitive nipple.

You wanted to smack him for that. Of all the places he had to touch, why the hell was it your tail!?

As revenge, you tugged off his ribbons, allowing the rest of his hair to fall against his shoulders. He parted from your bite- covered breast to glance up at you, and his hair seemed to frame his face like a dark halo.

Oh.

He tugged on your tail again, and this time, you could see the grin he wore everytime your body reacted.

“What?” Nezha asked innocently.

You exhaled. “I'm gonna hit you.”

“Doesn't that go against your little code?” He angled his hips again, finding that sensitive spot inside you. The warmth coiling in your stomach spread, and your hands clung to his shoulders, digging into the fabric of his jacket. “And you like it, so why are you complaining? You'll probably cum from this too.”

You scowled. “No, I won't.”

“Yes, you will.” Nezha gave your tail another firm tug. His nails scratched at it's base again, soothing the sensitive skin before he tugged again, all done with repeated motions, until your cunt spasmed and coated his cock with your arousal and slick as you came.

He cooed when you buried your face in the crook of his neck, his fingers still teasing your twitching tail while his cock throbbed inside you.

“See?” He insisted when you grumbled against his neck. “Told you you'd cum from it.”

He waited for you to catch your breath, and when you did, you raised your head to glare at him.

“Rot in hell.”

“And leave me with blue balls?”

“....”

***

“Nezhie! You're alive!!”

Nezha sighed, rubbing his temples from the incoming migraine threatening his skull. He had to fight the urge to grab the wrench nearby, looking so, so tempting as Wukong's big mouth came closer.

“Wukong, please.” He set his helmet down, glancing at the champion once again. “I'm not in the mood to listen to you yap. Yes, congrats, you won.”

The monkey looked offended by his comment. Nezha frowned, until he felt Wukong slugging him in the arm.

The wrench looked really tempting right about now.

“Dude! You're funny.” Wukong chuckled and patted his head. “Nah, nah. I'm not here to gloat. We're friends! I thought you upped and died!” He pinched him on the cheek, tugging the flesh until Nezha hissed a curse. “Don't be like that man. What else was I supposed to think, huh? Then you show back up again and you bring back a boyfriend too!”

“....boyfriend….?”

He glanced in the direction he'd last seen you. You had followed him back to Donghai, and the minute Jinzha had seen you with him, he hadn't waited before he jumped on you, bawling his eyes out about taking care of his little baby brother.

You were still there, trapped in his brother's hands.

“Wait…he's…. he's not my boyfriend.”

“Ah, right. Husband.”

“NO!”

@lotusarchon , 12.02.2025, all rights reserved. do not copy, repost or translate my works without permission. comments, reblogs and likes are appreciated!

[lotusarchon]

Do not panic when I say I come from your AO3. I promise you that in comparison to other users, you are very, VERY tame lol and have nothing to be ashamed about.

That out of the day, I'm really curious about your rabbit spirit character (?). I think it's the first time I've seen them in both your Nezha fic and Er'lang, and I saw your response to another commentor, so I'm interested in the exact lore.

I'm also curious about their relationship with Shen Gongbao haha.

You: Don't panic

me: *vomits*

Sorry sorry AO3 is my sore spot lmfao uhhhh well alr...

To summarize this, that rabbit spirit is my persona, actually. I got the idea recently to change my self insert that I use for my self ships into something...cuter! And it became that cute rabbit! I got the idea from this one video I saw too with a myth about some goose mountain...

What I have planned is that there's two versions of the rabbit spirit.

The first is the variant I use for my Reader in Erlang and Nezha's husband fics―the one where Shen Gongbao is her teacher and almost father figure.

In the actual story I'm planning though, rabbit spirit does NOT actually marry Nezha or Erlang, nor does she have any type of romantic feelings towards them. Like the fics mentioned, she was once a rabbit who ended up cultivating and was capable of taking a human form...but somewhere around the line, she was just too young compared to her sister, aka the fox spirit that became Su Daji. Shen Gongbao sees her and takes her as his student, but then after FSSY happened, she goes her separate way, and coincidentally runs into a fox spirit (not her relative) who takes her as his concubine (without much consent, to be frank.) And then somehow or the other, that follows through straight up into BMW plotline.

Then I guess at some point, Yun (main character for the story I'm planning) sorta ends up transmigrating into rabbit spirit's body...except that he isn't aware that this character exists already. He just assumes he died as an original character, because at the timing he transmigrated, he's within the Black Myth Wukong storyline :> and because he's never seen any rabbit spirit character while playing, he doesn't really think much about it...

All in all, think of it as rabbit spirit being Shen Qingqiu, and Yun being Shen Yuan, except that Yun is a hater who's not aware he's an oc, and he also wants to destroy the system forcing him to participate in a plot he wants no part of.

At the moment that's what I've got for now till I start writing.

Ngl I kinda like Shen Gongbao because he's just so fucking random in FSSY so I think him and Yun interacting would be fun...

[lotusarchon]

I mean I am western and I would get more involved with correcting misinformation however if I do that I also feel like it’s important for people to note that I am in fact western and have no connection to Chinese culture in any way shape or form (just a nerd)

And you can imagine how easily I can get shot down and pushed out of the discussion. Best I can do is walk them through the logic of ‘he may not be a child mentally or physically but he’s still a child!!!!’ and hope that they find how that deserves a spot in the hall of fame for ‘most impressive mental gymnastics ever witnessed’ (this is a real comment I’ve seen)

I think I might've misread so idk if you mean that your argument is "he may not be a child mentally or physically but he's still a child" or if you're saying that that is the sort of argument you come across....so if I misunderstood you my bad lmfao + my thoughts are allll over the place rn, I'm sorry if I don't make any sense

I'm a Western fan too so nah I gotchu bro. In my rants too I always add that I'm not Chinese nor have experience with Chinese culture. The closest to an Asian religion I can personally say I have experience with is Hinduism. And I forgot to add that in my rant; Western fans seem more used to a monotheistic religion (basically one singular god) and don't seem to understand how polytheistic religion works. Which again, DO YOUR HISTORY RESEARCHHHH

And honestly?? Even if you were an Eastern fan or had experience with Daoism/Buddhism, you'd still be refuted. I think if a Nezha age dickrider knew you were Western they'd get all "What do YOU know about Nezha you're not Chinese 😡" (from a few other rants I made lmfao) but even if you weren't, you'll still be refuted. My friend is Chinese and worshipped Nezha and they immediately told her she was wrong and Chinese people can be proshippers too. Which is kinda weird...cause my friend had only intended to point out Nezha being a child was false not about shipping ...

"he may not be a child mentally or physically but he's still a child"

😭 I'm sorry but if this is an argument you make (not you, Anon) you're gonna need to give me more than just that. A deep dive would be nice because...huh?

I personally think arguments that might include personality or appearances isn't a good argument for either side about Nezha (inside and outside of fandoms). People kinda fail to understand that in general, everyone is unique regarding personality and appearances. Someone can dress and appear childish, but that doesn't mean they're a child. Someone may act and think maturely, but that doesn't mean they're an adult. That's really not how it works.

And just. Gosh about Nezha's age. What do you mean he's still a child? That's not how anything works in general.

I would love if a Nezha age dickrider can argue with me by pulling up texts and facts. And I don't mean going into Wikipedia or Google, I mean pulling up with actual Chinese texts and Buddhist scriptures to tell me Nezha's an immortal child. I want someone who says Nezha's a child to come in clutch with Buddhist texts and historical facts to argue with me because really, I'm not taking you seriously if your case of arguments are JTTW and FSSY AND of course, only basic website information.

If you can come to argue with me with full information then by the gods I will take anyone arguing with me seriously

I kinda wanted to add a bit; even if you are a Western fan, Anon, who does your own proper research in your spare time and choose to involve yourself into the argument to steer people in the right direction, I really don't think they'll listen if at all. You aren't Asian, you're an "outsider" in their eyes, so your opinion wouldn't matter. Even if you bring in facts, as long as they're aware you're Western, you'll be considered an outsider. If you're Asian, then you're considered to be "spreading false facts" or faking that you're Asian to lie on this cute innocent religion 🧍

[fantasyiswaybetterthanreality]

Thank you for writing this. It's very informative and insightful. I've been nervous about a fanfic I've been writing for this fandom, but I feel more confident now about the whole thing.

I had to make a whole google doc to sort my thoughts on this, that's how mad I am tbh. My friends have made explanations which you can find here, and here. And while I told myself that after that post I was done, seeing my friend receive a comment like this was the final pushing point I needed.

I'm both going to ramble about Nezha here again, and I'm going to try and explain this in a way that'll get people to understand, as someone who once followed an Eastern religion too + I'm going to be stating my basic thoughts here so maybe some things won't make sense.

Mild info about me: I'm from Trinidad. My family is described with East Indian descent but clearly, I'm not from India itself. My knowledge of Hinduism is rather basic because I quit religion thanks to traumatic experiences related to it, however not lacking fully. From my father's side, specifically his mother, they practice Hinduism and can even be considered devout Hindus (if I'm to believe all the statues and pictures of about almost every single Hindu god). Though my knowledge is basic, understand that I'm not Hindu nor Indian, so of course these are my opinions and my experiences with Hinduism, and I do not advise you taking my word fully to heart. I'm only trying to explain something to the LMK fandom in the best way I know how too, by referencing another Eastern religion that isn't half as popular as Daoism/Buddhism.

There's only one show I know where Hinduism is portrayed, and it's an anime/manga series called Record Of Ragnarok (Shuumatsu No Valkyrie), and from what I know it's not well liked by others (and even banned I think?) because of the fact Shiva is weaker than Zeus and the supposed sexualization of Parvati, Kali and Durga? It's been a while so I could be wrong on this though.

Why am I bringing this topic up to a rant about a lego character though?

#1) Fiction vs Religion and Reality

While one half expresses discontent and discomfort, I've seen others who clearly don't mind because Shiva is still badass and cool. I myself had some qualms about his appearance in the beginning because while I did quit religion, this was a god I used to worship, and seeing him in an anime/manga and be sexualized and simped for was…uncanny, to say the least. Overtime I grew numb to it though because it was genuinely funny and even I, an ex Hindu, found him attractive, and had not much hesitation writing smut about him in past fics. 

Similarly, I can imagine this is how Daoists and Chinese had originally felt about Nezha in Lego Monkie Kid [Only referencing LMK with Chinese deities. I'm aware there could be other media where they're in.] A bit weird at first but then overall got used to it because there's genuinely no harm done, as it's not meant to be an educational retelling of a god, but a fictional portrayal of him.

Returning to the point I mentioned with Shiva. When I first came across this series in 2021 (?), I did not feel too happy and comfortable with the image of a deity I've grown up worshipping as a child. I quit religion when I turned 13, so it's been nearly five years since I've had nothing to do with the main religion of my household; Hinduism. Still, I practically grew up worshipping this god I was taught to fear, and seeing a potrayal of him (which honestly in my opinion) didn't seem like a good thing at the time. 

Why did I eventually stop being bothered? Because this wasn't supposed to be retelling of Shiva. This was just a character with similarities to the god I worshipped, but wasn't the god. The series I watched wasn't even intending to teach audiences about any of the religions and real life figures they portrayed, they simply used them as inspiration to tell a story. They weren't accurate representations, but that was the point. It's a story about gods vs humans from history; of course it wasn't going to be accurate nor stay true to the figure they took inspiration from.

You can imagine then for a cartoon series meant to sell Legos. Lego Monkie Kid contains several characters that are known in Chinese myths and legends/religions. Of the most popular mentioned, there is Sun Wukong, one of the main characters in the series, Tang Sanzang otherwise known as Tripitaka and the Great Monk, Lady Guanyin mentioned in season 1, the one the fandom argues about, Nezha, the Jade Emperor in season 4, and most recently, Nuwa, and Heavenly Pagoda King, Li Jing. There may be others but these are the ones that are most known within the fandom. 

Mind you some of these figures are still very much worshipped now, but, point remains: the series was never intended to be a retelling of these characters stories, nor were they intended to be educational for audiences. They took inspiration directly, gave their own twists, and hence you have the story of LMK, meant to originally promote Legos and then eventually gave way to the series that this fandom belongs too.

These characters are not their source material, nor the origins of which they came from as religious figures. Sun Wukong is a Buddha within JTTW’s ends and if I'm right is still worshipped as such sometimes (?). He didn't hide away into a mountain at the end of his journey. His companions didn't die, nor were they reincarnated, but instead also acquired titles and became Buddhas as well. (Or gods? I frankly don't remember). Tang Sanzang as we've in season 4 was not some sort of brave, astute man in the book but rather a crybaby coward. Need I even point out that Nezha wouldn't have a giant mech to fight people, nor would he have such close deposition with the Jade Emperor? Or the fact that the Jade Emperor would be bested by someone like Azure Lion?

Not even counting Journey To The West and the Fengshen Yanyi, the real Tang Sanzang that Wu Cheng’en took inspiration of most certainly did not have a monkey, a pig, a water demon and a dragon turned horse with him on his journey. 

Why speak of all this?

To make my first point; religion and fiction are two very different things. Religion has existed for who knows how long, and fiction has recently decided to include fictional potrayals of these gods into stories and cartoons. From a writer's perspective, it's really interesting taking something that is a part of religion and writing it into your own works, with your own take on it.

And of course, brings me to the topic of Nezha.

Lego Monkie Kid Nezha is, according to an official writer within the show's team, an adult. Although many fans have their objections about this, supposedly because Nezha in other sources is a child god, and think that the writer only abruptly pointed out Nezha's an adult to save her own skin.

Taking all my points in consideration; let me humour the Nezha is a child god idea. What, exactly, does this have to do with Nezha in Monkie Kid? 

If Nezha, the god within Daoism and Buddhism, is supposedly a child deity, what law says that any other potryal of Nezha has to abide by this? 

By this logic. Shiva in the anime I mentioned above shouldn't be weaker than Zeus. He also shouldn't even be agreeing to fight mortals, as he's a deity far above such petty behavior. Zeus shouldn't be portrayed in books like PJO as a lecherous cheater, because in reality, Ancient Greece consisted of multiple kingdoms and thereby different interpretations of Zeus were merged together which is what consists of the myths we know of him today which is highly disrespectful, and Sun Wukong shouldn't be a mentor to MK, because he's supposed to be a Buddhist, and thereby wouldn't be entertaining fighting nuances.

Fiction doesn't not adhere to reality. The fact I need to say this astounds me because should this not be obvious? Lego Monkie Kid is a cartoon set in some sci-fi futuristic world with lego people walking around, where gods somehow need mechs to go around fighting, and there are animal-like demons/yaoguai walking around here and there. There is literally an arcade in the show with zero gravity. Do you possibly believe for a miniscule second that anything that goes down in a fictional setting will adhere to our reality??

And, even then, humouring the Nezha being a child deity concept > what law says that he has to be portrayed as a child in other pieces of fiction?? Especially when the fictional setting is not meant to be a retelling or for educational purposes, but rather to carry a plot. 

There is nothing, no law, no rules that insists that a religious figure must be portrayed as they are in a legend/myth for a fictional world.

Lego Monkie Kid Nezha is not the deity Nezha. He is a completely different character, which many of you should have realized from the exact moment he was brought into the show. They are not the same person. Never was. 

“Oh, it's disrespectful―” From a writer's perspective, I personally don't think so. If I wanted to make a story that involved a god, I wouldn't keep everything that makes that god who they are. There are some key points I would keep to make the story, but I would ultimately create an OC that shares some attributes to this religious figure, but it wouldn't be him. The show Record of Ragnarok does a good job with this in my opinion, because while many characters share some attributes to the real figures they're inspired by, the writers changed several things to create a proper story, and thereby making these characters OCs and not the actual gods themselves, and of course that logic applies to Lego Monkie Kid.

In the instance, again, Nezha the god from Daoism, is in fact a child deity, Nezha in LMK isn't. Nezha in LMK is someone who's entirely different from the god himself. 

So, the logic this fandom uses confuses me a lot. Do you not understand how to seperate fiction from religion?? Do many of you not understand media literacy, and what a writing process is like?

Sigh. Moving to another point―

#2) Character Designs

Sometimes, when it comes to character designs, anyone could just throw them into anything and think, “Yeah that's good.” Not much thought is given to a character's appearances depending, which I don't really blame as someone who's 1) done literature as a hobby and has seen my fair share of character designs, 2) creates characters myself. It's too hard thinking of a character's appearance, and even then when making them there normally wouldn't be any significance.

Nezha's design in LMK seems to be a huge source of debate when arguing about his age. It was actually brought up in my previous post, specifically that his hairstyle was often used by children at the time. 

I have a bone to pick with this point.

This is Nezha from Lego Monkie Kid:

However, this is Mei from the same show:

Before anyone starts, allow me to point out as a history geek that likes religion and pointless facts over politics: I am aware that there are different hairstyles to show certain things, including one's age and status and sometimes even personality. Do not bring up any points about the differences in these characters hairstyles with an excuse, “Oh, but you should know―”, because I know how hairstyles could be treated within history. 

However. Look at Nezha's hairstyle, and then Mei's. I've never seen the LMK fandom complain about Mei's age, because it was generally believed that MK and Mei are both at least 18 if not older, as the legal age for a driver's license in China is 18. 

Both Nezha and Mei are wearing a ‘bun’ type hairstyle. Mei's is arguably more of twin ponytails (?), but I'm not a hairstylist, so I don't know what they're called. To me they look similar, that's all I'm trying to say. And even if they weren't though―through a modern lense, a hairstyle isn't reserved for just any specific age. Anyone can wear a hairstyle they want. Keep in mind that the creators of LMK are also Western(?), and they chose a hairstyle for these two characters based on personality and appearances. 

A hairstyle is not reserved for any age. Grown women including my aunts have worn hairstyles similar to these just for fun.

That's point one.

Point two; Nezha is a very popular deity, much like Sun Wukong. In terms of recognition, Sun Wukong is very easy to recognize because of his staff and his overall cocky personality. 

Nezha however is an entirely different case. Most media potrayals of him always has the two-bun hairstyle of him, which is what makes Nezha recognizable. If you remove that specific hairstyle of his, you won't recognize him. It's iconic, and pointed out in this scene (The Legend of Hei) where Nezha makes an appearance as well.

[Characters sitting together. White haired boy (Hei + MC) looks at the older, dark haired boy (Nezha). Nezha looks back.]

Nezha: What? You want an autograph?

Hei: You're a boy?

Nezha: Yeah?

Hei: Your hairstyle is cute.

[Nezha looks in front with an annoyed expression.]

Nezha: If it weren't for the recognizability, I'd have changed it long ago.

Hei: Recognizability?

[Nezha removes the buns(? some form of them?) from his head. Three older figures glance at him.]

???: Who are you?

[Scene returns]

Nezha: See?

Aka, point being made: those buns are what makes Nezha recognizable. If he doesn't have that hairstyle, unless it's specifically pointed out, I'm certain majority would not recognize him. 

Some hairstyles are meant to be done for some form of meaning. But sometimes, as is the case with designs, they're just there just because no one wanted to make the characters bald. Using the excuse about Nezha's hairstyle to justify his age as a child is by far the lamest and dumbest excuse I've ever heard of, because the creators did not give him that hairstyle for the sake of some meaning anymore than MK was given his current hairstyle either. It's his logo at this point, ignoring his color scheme aside.

Even then, if the creators of Lego Monkie Kid intended for Nezha to be a child within the show, he would not appear as he is. Lego Monkie Kid has made children models, which we can see here (used from s3 and up in case someone tries to excuse the differences in seasons): 

And of course, Nezha's model;

Despite the perspective and low quality though, he's at least the same height as Red Son here:

If Lego Monkie Kid truly intended for Nezha to be a child, his appearance and model would be similar to the children's in the show. Perspective is difficult to find but you can clearly see he's about the same height as the other adult characters if not taller, and is not small like the child figures we see.

Pink isn't a children's color, and nothing about Nezha's clothing indicates a child. He very much looks like an adult and doesn't exhibit childish behavior as we see Red Son, Mei and MK do.

I've seen fans use his voice to point out he's an adult, but I'm not sure that's a valid point. I say this as someone who has a 13 year old brother and was recently a minor myself. 

Allow me to clarify: a voice isn't a clear proof of age. My father is a 45 year old man but sounds very much like a woman/teenage girl. My brother is 13 and sounds more of an adult than his father. My classmate in highschool was one year older than me and his voice was very high-pitched. 

The voice actors in LMK are directed to speak a certain way for a reason…in English. I'm not sure about Mandarin. In my opinion, Wukong's voice sounds like Son Goku's because it's a reference to the fact Wukong is what inspired Goku. Nezha's probably sounds deep and brooding not because he's a child but because it almost represents his own personality, and probably is a reference from another shonen protagonist Ichigo Kurosaki. MK's voice in the beginning sounds really childish to me but slowly as the events of s3, 4 and 5 happen it gets more deeper almost as a reference to show how his ‘innocence’ is slowly fading. 

Or, I might be looking to into it. Regardless, tdlr, don't use Nezha's voice in your argument. I've seen grown ass men have high pitched voices. 

Returning to my original point however; if you have an ounce of media literacy and understanding, you should be aware that some character designs are chosen for a reason. Nezha's icon is those two bun hairstyle, and the writers purposely chose it so old fans/readers of JTTW and FSYY and maybe other Chinese/Daoists would be able to recognize him and go, “Hey, that's Nezha from―”

Before I got into LMK, I read JTTW and also saw The Legend of Hei and the Nezha 2019 movie, so I knew him because of the hairstyle. And my first instinct of course was to point out, “That's the dude from TLOH!!” when I saw him. So, the hairstyle was chosen for the recognizability, and I highly doubt as a sign of age.

Even then, LMK Nezha aside, moving on to a different point.

#3) Sources Of Inspiration

The 21st century isn't really the first era where people are taking inspiration from other cultures. As a matter of fact, it's been happening for decades, and it's very prominent in religion, which someone of you would know if you both a) actually did proper research, b) gave a shit about what you're researching and c) studied history.

Hilariously, I have done all three of the above. 

I'm going to use a popular example here with Sun Wukong and Hanuman. Hinduism is supposedly largely considered one of the oldest religions in the world. If you truly think about it, certain Daoist deities are loosely inspired or are versions of Hindu gods, which I'm going to use here with a popular example (and provide a link too).

― Sun Wukong and Hanuman. The earliest Vedic records mention one of the supposed known monkey gods, and their similarities make scholars suggest Hanuman inspired Sun Wukong. Specifically his figure in JTTW, where it's speculated that the author must've had a copy of Vedic (?) hymns. While Sun Wukong does predate JTTW, Hanuman definitely has had some influence on him.

Much, much similarly, the deity known as Nezha, is also loosely inspired/based off the figure known as Nalakuvara, who appears in Hindu and Buddhist mythology, and often appears as a sexual trickster figure in Hindu and Buddhist literature.

Historically speaking, when it comes to religion and myths, something many people fail to understand is that before there was the idea of writing to tell a story, there was the process known as sharing from mouth to ear. Not in a literal sense, but rather that people often preferred to tell stories via word of mouth back then, and as things always go in history, there will be changes. The proof is literally right there. Nezha was originally known as Nalakuvara, yet when transmitted through Buddhist texts, he became known as Nazha, then Nezha. And as such, the Lotus Prince and Chinese god known as Nezha was created. A combination of Nalakuvara and the child god Krishna.

A lot of people will want to jump on that specific point that mentions Krishna being a child god, so allow me to immediately put you down right there.

Ex Hindu here; I did not even know there was a portrayal of Krishna as a child. Up until I stopped practicing Hinduism, I used to worship Krishna as an adult figure. In the paintings and statues my aunts had for Diwali as a child, he was always showcased as an adult.

Ironically, doesn't this apply for the actual god Nezha too? 

When it comes to religion and myths, many of you forget something very important; there is no such thing as a canon iteration. These aren't shows, these are stories from the past told through different people, and passed through many hands. There is no such thing as a canon version because almost everyone had their own version of a myth or story. Terms you may typically apply to fandoms don't apply to fucking religions and myths, and some of you are so chronically online that you forget it.

#4) The LMK Fandom's Chronically Online Attitude

I'm an ex Hindu who still faintly remembers some bits and pieces from my childhood while practicing this religion, especially during the Diwali period, where little me managed to get new information from library books about the gods my family worshipped. I personally didn't like sitting during the priest's (forgot what he was called) chanting though but the funny white thingy we used to have to wear was fun. 

There are some Hindu gods I'm familiar with, like Lakshmi, Kali, Durga and the other versions of her (I still can't recover from the one statue with her in a fish..) Parvati, Shiva, Vishnu, Hanuman (yaah), Rama and Sita, Ganesh (also yah) and of course, Krishna.  I also have watched my fair share of childhood movies and cartoons where the gods were mentioned or present―Karan & Arjun specifically struck the fear in me with Kali 😭😭 holy fuck that movie scared me with the creepy edits jeez T-T. There was also that one cartoon about Rama and Sita”s story specifically Hanuman, and this Indian TV series where this little girl was a loyal devotee to Ganesha (I had no idea rats were one of his uh signature animals holy shit).

I'm rambling here a bit because the childhood memories were fun, but the point I'm going for is though….

I am familiar with these gods I grew up with. And I know about them, maybe not enough but certainly enough to know how to properly respect them from back then. 

And, using Krishna as a prime example; if someone came up to me, or I came across anyone, who argues that the god I know is an immortal child, even though I have worshipped and adult version of him, I'd be so fucking pissed. Krishna is seen as an adult, I worshipped him as an adult, but there are cases where he's a child god, and that's fine! But to have someone tell you that you're wrong about the god you know about because they got some basic information off the internet, undoubtedly, I'm going to be pissed. Especially when it's from a Western fan who has no fucking brain.

So, of course, imagine how devotees of Nezha and Chinese people must be feeling every single time this fandom fucks about with Nezha's age. I saw it myself; people told my friend that a) she was lying and b) her statement is irrelevant just because “I did my proper research, and even if you're Chinese you can still be a proshipper, Nezha's a child deity.”

It's genuinely so fucked up to me how the LMK fandom act towards Nezha's age. You guys will ignore the people who are willing to provide accurate information for the sake of being in the right and accusing people for being a proshipper over a deity they have more experience with than you, a Western fan who has no knowledge of Eastern religion.

It's insane. There are actual Daoist and Chinese who are pointing out the fact Nezha isn't an immortal fucking child. 

You're not only disrespectful, you insane, childish and most importantly chronically online. Nezha the god isn't a fictional character, there's nothing ‘canon’ about him. He's a god who's lived for decades longer than you, and his existence predates yours. People have long sinced worshipped Nezha, and the fact that you can so boldly tell someone they're wrong about the god they've worshipped is so disrespectful.

Do you not realize, as Nezha is worshipped as a child, he's worshipped as an adult? Do you not take into account how absolutely disgusting and horrible you are telling Daoists and Chinese who have stated time and time again the information of Nezha being an immortal child is factually incorrect that they're wrong and know nothing??

I'm repeating my statement; I'm an ex Hindu, but if anyone told me that Krishna's an immortal child too and then point out I'm wrong and my point doesn't matter, I would be seething. And I don't blame my friend who's losing their temper about Nezha's age. 

What amazes me though, somehow, is the fact that. If anyone who was Chinese + Daoist agreed with your claims, as Cole from Twitter once did, none of you would've spoken that way to my friend. But of course, once she points out she's Chinese/ex Daoist and disagrees with you, majority of the opinions switched because, she wasn't agreeing with your headcanon, right? So even though she's Chinese, she's bad because she disagreed with you.

You're all disgusting and fucking weird.

And the fact y'all in this fandom will habitually prove yourselves as hypocrites by attacking people, and then ignoring the ones who are capable of proving you're wrong to cling to a false idea is insane. You guys need some actual help, holy fucking shit. 

Nezha isn't an immortal child. That's a god. If he was intended to be a child in LMK, there would've been statements about it. 

Seperate fiction from religion, and seperate your headcanon from canon and the actual god. If you think this biased headcanon is okay and attacking people that point you out for being wrong is somehow okay, I sincerely ask that you take a break from the internet, and read a book.

No, don't just read a book. Read a history book. Pick up some knowledge, understand how religion and history works. 

Furthermore. The research some of you guys are doing is actually shit, by the way. You guys aren't researching properly if you can pull up with Nezha is 12, thing. If you actually cared about his age, you'd put more effort and actually stop being disrespectful to the people who are giving you the proper information. You only research surface level so you can attack people.

And additionally, stop playing the Devil's advocate. Most of you are just Western fans who think you know everything from reading one book or watching one show. You read JTTW or watch OSP’s videos and suddenly, you know more than an actual Chinese person or Daoist. You look up Wikipedia and think, “Oh yeah, I'll go with this!” And that's it. Most of you at best can provide only three websites at most, and I can bet my ass that these websites with information about Nezha's age was written by a fan who got their information from a shit source.

I love History, and most specifically, I love religion. Not so much the divine aspects as it is about the myths that surround it. Whenever I get into a fandom, I need to find out more about their religion and history. Getting into JTTW, and eventually, LMK, pushed me into a rabbit hole of Chinese myths that I really enjoy learning. But dealing with idiots who think they know more?? It's sickening as shit.

I'd like to think I'm good at literature things because once it's a religion or myth I want to learn everything about it. But I know I don't know everything, and I know especially I have more to learn. I'd never tell someone who is a part or worships the religion/culture I'm learning that they're factually incorrect about it just because I have an opinion and I learnt my info from a random source.

You guys in the LMK fandom are incredibly entitled. The Nezha is 12 controversy is a headcanon, which became worst by that asshat Cole on Twitter. And because so many of you don't want to learn the truth, whenever someone tries to point out and help you, you ignore them or attack them, and deny their heritage.

And honestly?? You guys suck. 

And this is coming from me!! Some of y'all are grown ass adults too!! And yet I'm childish and immature!?!

Brother I literally turned 18 a few months ago, yet I'm 100% certain I'm not throwing a blasted hissy fit over a fucking god the way some of you all who are most definitely adults are doing.

And finally, the one thing that actually does make me laugh is because I'm pretty sure most of you didn't do History classes. One of the most important things my history teacher taught me is; don't use Wikipedia as a source of viable information. Thousands of people are capable of accessing Wikipedia and changing information as they want, and so it's much better to find book solid resources from libraries. I did in fact use Wikipedia too (hypocritical of me yeah) so of course I wouldn't advise using the screenshots I provided from Wikipedia as evidence to the argument, because anything on Wikipedia can be changed. If I'm feeling extra petty I could change something myself to be in the right.

Furthermore, if you dare to bring up only JTTW and FSSY as a plausible argument about Nezha's age, I'm genuinely going to throw hands and fuck your mother. I think my friend also mentioned it in their posts but I'll mention it here too; JTTW does NOT state Nezha's age. I've read JTTW, and aside from Wukong vs Nezha there's nothing else that states Nezha's age. For all we're aware of, Wukong called Nezha a kid just out of spite, and I do it too when I'm arguing with someone. FSSY is the Investiture of the Gods and the ORIGINS!! Do you THINK a book about the ORIGINS of the gods would focus on other aspects about them!!? No!!

I expect some of the arguments I might get are;

"Oh, Nezha [appearances] could be wearing a glamor!" That is a headcanon, as we see nothing in LMK to refute that. Macaque's scar is canon because it's shown within the show. Nezha's appearance has NOT fluctuated since he was introduced. The idea of him using a glamor or illusion is a HEADCANON unless proven by the show. And headcanons are NOT vital.

"But you use Wikipedia too :(" Which I pointed out and made aware of, which is I also doubt that source myself. If any of you did History, your teachers are supposed to INFORM you that using a website is NOT a good idea for backing up information, and it's much better to use books or other trusted sources. In the case of Nezha, I'm trusting actual Daoists/Chinese who knows more about him than I do. It's because I did PROPER research that I even came across a good source of information, aka @ruibaozha, who I'm sure can share more light on this than me! The fact that some of you guys won't even acknowledge them is almost proof that...you're clinging to a headcanon. Jackass.

"But Nezha in JTTW/FSSY are 7/12 and that's where LMK takes it's inspiration from so obviously―" We've seen for a fact LMK does NOT follow JTTW to the letter. Jade Emperor beating Wukong?? Lady Bone Demon being a powerful foe and being trapped in a bunker? Azure even being able to kill the Emperor? Majority of the LMK fandom likes to point out that LMK Macaque and JTTW Macaque are two different people, especially when you claim that Macaque is a bad character because he cannibalized the monkeys. So then, with this logic, JTTW Nezha, FSSY Nezha, and LMK Nezha are also three seperate figures. I swear someone made a post about the differences JTTW and FSSY Nezha have too, but I can't find it so meh. The point still remains though. LMK Nezha are two different people, you're not making any sense to me about that argument. Even then, LMK isn't taking direct inspiration and putting their own twist. Who says anything needs to be accurate??

"The writer only said Nezha's an adult to ship lotuspeach!" Are you faintly aware people, actual Chinese people, have shipped these characters together? Proshippers can come from anywhere but I genuinely doubt every single person is a proshipper because of course, they're aware their god isn't an eternal child. On top of that, in a situation like this another writer would point out that Nezha ISN'T an adult. No one has argued against this claim, so why persist? Where's your logic coming from if not entitlement?

I want this to be the last time I have to talk about Nezha, because I made my blog to write porn and me smooching my favorite LMK characters. I kinda don't really like making discussions like this because that's not the point of my blog.

However...I do like rambling. A lot :)))

Anyways, point blank. LMK fandom needs to grow out of this entitled mindset and stop ignoring the facts from experts. You guys are just being annoying at this point.

My argument isn't really valid tbh, just pointless rambling because I only know basic information. I think you guys should find proper information from accounts online.

Also, if you're gonna argue: don't bring be albeist, racist etc etc. I'm capable of cussing you out without bringing up your mental health, race or identity :)))