#from: neochan

[be-my-sunrise]

your recent reaction post made me wanna try it on my bf and this is how that went…..you out here making people get laid. thank you for your service 🫡

AYOO?!? "JUST MAKE SURE YOU SWALLOW ALL OF IT" 👁👄👁

the way he's immediately down for it tho LMAOO i love that for you. glad to be of service🫡 have fun!! ;)

[luviestarz]

mark lee fic recs!

⪩⪨ Operation: First Kiss - @ncityrave (Mark turns to his friends for help to build up the courage for his relationship's first kiss.)

⪩⪨ Sunday Kind of Love : Frat Mark - @smileysuh (Mark is fine with having a crush on the girl in the library. He’s fine watching her from afar. And he’s fine with never speaking a word to the girl who he spends many nights chasing in his dreams. But fate, and a few nosey frat brothers, think Mark would be much better if he was forced to talk to the cute girl from the library that he can’t seem to get out of his head.)

⪩⪨ tis the damn season - mark smau - @najaemism (in which your ex-boyfriend comes back to your hometown—and he wants to talk to you.)

⪩⪨ Delphinium - @ncteez (It wasn’t intentional. You don’t even know why you cared that he didn’t believe in pre-marital sex, but it didn’t stop you from arguing with him about it. You didn’t intend to win the argument either. Then again, he kind of let you.)

⪩⪨ 9:10 PM - @neochan (possessive! mark)

⪩⪨ WITH YOU | MK.L - @sehunniepotwrites (There are many things Mark Lee wants to do with you. He wants to walk you home. He wants to dive into the deep blue sea with you. He wants to go on a drive with you at his side. But mostly, this crazy, head over heels in love boy just wants to make it with you.)

⪩⪨ spidey boy ; 이민형 - @martiniblues (mark has tried to hide his secret identity from you for as long as possible, to keep you safe, of course. little does he know that you’ve untangled his web of lies long ago and will do anything in your power to get him to admit it. just when you've had enough of him lying to you, he ends up getting caught in the act trying to save your life.)

⪩⪨ eyes on me. (m.l) - @mrkis (mark wants you to keep your eyes on him as he pleases you.)

⪩⪨ GOLDEN HOUR. | L.MK - @onyourhyuck (You’re a waiter and Mark Lee the local biker and infamous bad boy loves the eggs your diner makes, but now he wants a taste of you.)

⪩⪨ madly in love - mark lee - @p0ckykiss (mark had always been the hopeless romantic type)

⪩⪨ it’s too bad you’re married to me | m.l - @yojeongin (all mark ever does is use weaponized incompetence to get out of small tasks you ask of him. when he finally realizes you resort to his close friends to do what he can’t— nothing can prepare him for what’s in your pandora box; now karma is set in motion.)

⪩⪨ Pretty Boy. (m.l) - @ncteez (Mark’s favorite thing to do is sit alone at the library and enjoy the knowledge that his university offers. In contrast, your favorite thing to do is go to parties and enjoy as much chaos as possible. However, upon realizing your grades have dropped drastically due to this lifestyle, you have no choice but to approach Mark for help. or the one where your new favorite thing to do is seduce the most inexperienced man you’ve ever met and watch how desperate he gets for you.)

⪩⪨ gelato | lmk - @hazyhae (a high slip up cost you mark lee years ago, and you’ve spent years burying your memories of him ever since. the universe has other plans for you when your old friend starts a new career, smoking his way back into your life.)

⪩⪨ ꒰ 𝐍𝐎 𝐎𝐍𝐄 𝐁𝐔𝐓 𝐘𝐎𝐔 ꒱ 이민형 - @loserlvrss (one thing about your boyfriend, mark, is that he would always take care of you — even if you were annoyingly drunk — and he was embarrassingly in love)

[hyuckmov]

himbo haechan pt.2 (preview)

FULL FIC POSTED HERE

first part here teaser wc: 350 (fluff, suggestive) full fic genre: fluff, smut, a little angst if u squint a/n: sorry i can't get this out b4 his birthday...but we (himbo hyuck and i) are soooo back <3 hope this little snippet feels like it fits right into part 1, and also feels like a warm hug from ME as a thank u for loving himbo haech so much !!!!

taglist (thank u for everyone who replied to my first post! reply to this/send an ask/ write in tags etc. if u want to be added to the taglist too) : @luafvr @liliansun @hotmessexpress35 @ery-noice @tddyhyck @xenkimmie @ofjunemoment @neochan

"i can't believe i really get to hold you like this…" he murmured, in awe.

haechan said something along these lines practically every time you cuddled in the evenings, and the words never faded in their sweetness. lost in his own thoughts, he stroked your hair with slightly shaky hands, and placed a gentle kiss to your temple. "i keep thinking i'm going to blink, and then the next second you'll be yelling at me again…"

you feel a twinge of guilt, and you're just about to apologize when —

"…but also, i kind of miss that too…"

there it was.

"do you want me to pretend to get mad at you?" you suggest, smiling a little as you climb on top of him. there's something reverent in the way he tilts his head up, never breaking eye contact as his hands instinctively come up to grip your waist and steady you. "or you could make me mad on purpose?"

"wouldn't be the first time…" he mumbles, the familiar cloudy look making its way into his irises, his gaze now unfocused and dazed as his eyes flick up and down your body.

"really?"

he nods. "never actually deleted our project, didn't actually submit a draft for the final assignment, didn't really lose your underwear…"

a laugh rises up in your throat, half part incredulous and the other hopelessly endeared.

"if you want me to be rough with you, next time, just ask me," you promise him, patting him on the chest lightly.

"i mean…i keep thinking i want you to get mad at me, so we can fuck like we used to…" he scrunches his nose in thought, lowering his gaze. “but i just… there’s just…”

"but…?"

"but also i really like making love to you," he whispers. "i love it so much, and i feel like, because we're at the start of our relationship it means more.” holding your hands in his now, he gives them a light squeeze. “and i don’t want to ruin that, you know?”

your breath hitches in your throat, and all of a sudden you don’t know what to say.

"does that make sense?" he asks, softly. "did i say something wrong?"

“haechan….” you’re convinced your heart has melted in your chest, tears threatening to fall from your lashes from how raw and intimate he could be with his words. love was so easy to him, and he showed you time and time again that he wouldn’t change. “i love you so-”

“- so should we try shower sex?”

[rainyjeno]

[11:52pm]

warnings: adult themes and content, non edited.

Your eyes wandered over to your boyfriend as he pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose, you smiled slightly before leaning over to kiss his cheek. “Babe… pay attention to me.” You whined as your kisses trailed over his bare shoulder, your fingers dancing over his chest. “Just one more chapter baby.” He’d respond with a soft kiss on your head before turning back to his book he was buried in. You smiled against his skin feeling the heat under your lips before resuming your kisses.. “hmm one more chapter and then you’re all mine?” You batted your eyelashes up at him as you trailed your fingers up his thigh. You felt him tense under your touch, his breath catching in his throat as he glanced at you.

“Keep teasing and i’ll have no choice but to deny you more.” He spoke. His voice was stern as his eyes scanned the words in his book, franticly trying to finish the chapter. You pouted before you straddled him slowly, taking the book from his hands setting it on the table next to you. Your hands cupping his cheeks as you kissed him. Fingers pulling his glasses off, he let his fingers slip over your bare thighs that hugged his waist, hands cupping your ass grinding you into him as he deepened the kiss, resulting in a moan escaping your lips. “Such a needy baby…” he mumbled against your lips, his hands running up the sweater you’d stolen from him days prior.

tags ; @neochan @peachjaem00

[neochan]

💌 - from the bottom of my heart, i want to thank each and every one of you who has decided to stick around <3 to those who like, comment, send asks, & reblog; this blog wouldn't have grown this big without you. & to the silent readers, thank you for indulging in my world of nct.

i never thought our community would grow this big. i mean, fifteen thousand people....and you want to read my writing? it baffles me honestly. but i'm so so thankful i have the ability to create a safe environment for yall to talk about our little kpop boys haha!!

each one of you has brought your unique insights and energy to this space, & i really cannot thank you enough. god, i remember sitting in the library like four years ago when i only had about a thousand followers... and even still, writing for nct has continued to bring me joy, and you all have been apart of keeping that spark alive.

& so have the mutuals i've met along the way. a lot of them have drifted off into bigger and better things, but to the ones who are still around, you mean a lot to me and this blog. never forget that.

huge thank you to @peachjaem00 . you've been stuck with me for years, and i couldn't think of a better mutual to spend that time with. we have both grown as people & writers and i want to thank you for always being there to help me through anything. i hope i can continue being that person for you as well.

& for @rainyjeno . you started as a reader and ended up being a friend. if it weren't for this blog, i wouldn't have driven hundreds of miles to see you and go get sushi, we wouldn't have facetimes and collabs etc. planned. we wouldn't have the friendship we do. thank you for always being here <3

and finally, @saintlyhyuck . kay, you aren't around much anymore, but we still talk all the time, & i love having the four hour phone calls. i love screaming abt things other than nct. i love planning a trip to come see you (my first ever international trip). and i thank you for being an amazing mutual to this blog.

there are so many others, @hykwrld , @mrkis , @hyuckmov , @ofjunemoment , @ohmytyong @lisired you guys are at the top of my head rn. thank you for supporting me and this blog. i'll continue to do the same for you <3

okay, moving on lol. i got too sappy i think. but as for the future of this blog. i have put this off for a while, but i'm going to stop writing soon. by soon, i mean this time next year. i'm going to be entering law school, and moving on to bigger and better things like my past mutuals. i'll be stuck doing real adult stuff, and i won't be able to continue this blog.

but that doesn't mean you'll see the last of neochan. you still have a year with me, sam, but once the time comes, this blog will be passed on to someone else who will continue the neochan legacy (there isn't really one but i like the sound of that.) of course, i may change my mind, if this becomes the stress reliever that it once was, but for now, i'm pretty set on this.

so here's to our last year, let's make it count, okay?

sam <3

[hykwrld]

when u said royal guard!jaemin i truly went dizzy 🫠 i can just imagine the shift in the power dynamic from when you’re in public and having him serve you to the things he’ll say when it’s just the two of you <33

sam @neochan and i discussed royal guard!jaemin HEAVILY

it’s all about how you’re betrothed to some random prince from a far away kingdom and hes determined to absolutely ruin you for him. you’re supposed to stay pure until your wedding but it’ll be your first time and you’re nervous so jaemin offers to help you. he takes your first kiss and teaches you how to get him off before it quickly progresses into him bending you over any surface to fuck you dumb. you take it all as him teaching, your brain turning fuzzy every time his thick cock kisses your sweet spot. he wants you to think of him when you fuck your prince, he wants you to come crying to him, begging for his cock because he just can’t make you cum. it just fills jaemin with so much pride to know he was your first for everything, that every part of you from your pretty tits to your sopping cunt are his <3

[nctpromptmeme]

POST #1 - JULY 30/23

PROMPT #1:

mark + smut + rock band au fulfilled! - rule breaker by @neochan

PROMPT #2:

jaemin, loooots of smut, e2l, and at a masquerade ball! inspo can be the pic from his instagram post that one time

PROMPT #3:

haechan fluff piece. kissing haechan everywhere, but especially his face/moles.

PROMPT #4:

jaemin with arm or hand kink (or both) pls i'm begging [admin note: i assume smut]

will update this post with links and reblogs if there are works completed for the prompts.

if you are a writer who wishes to complete any of these, please mention this blog and link this post in your fic!

[peachjaem00]

Tagged by @niurd-main thank you love💙

rules: post four characters that make you say "my man, my man, my man"

Jess Mariano from Gilmore girls

Nanami Kento from JJK

Mako from The Legend of Korra

Nico de Varona from The Atlas Six series

Tagging @rainyjeno @ohmytyong @ichorai @neo-shitty @neochan @simplyquetzo @neoneun-au

[raibebe]

Didn’t think I’d ever need to make an exposé post like this but. I have been plagiarized. Twice. By the same person.

The first time, a post by the lovely @neochan brought my attention to an account that by now has been deactivated who plagiarized some of their stuff as well as my Kinktober Day 26 Drabble: Waxplay with Renjun. It had been up since almost 1 1/2 years (see screenshots below)

My original post made October 26th 2021

Their copy pasted version under the title of “Miss Hot Sensation” posted literally 5 days after. It’s the same as mine down to the word count. They only changed one warning.

So I did what one should do and confronted them. I didn’t get any answer but they seemingly deactivated.

So why am I making this post? Because just now another lovely human informed me that I have been plagiarized yet again. I didn’t think anything off it until I clicked on the provided link and sure enough, its the exact same post as before just a new account.

The only thing that has changed is the word count so I assume they simply deleted a paragraph or something.

Funnily enough, when I went to text them from my raibebe blog, my messages weren’t getting delivered as seen below which means that they probably blocked this account. But luckily, I have more than one blog, so I just texted them from there :)

What’s funny as well, if you have read @neochan’s original post about the plagiarism is that this person used to have “17” listed as they age in their bio. After being called out on being a minor and posting smut, they changed it to “18” and now they’re claiming to be 22.

Please just stop plagiarizing me and other writers as well while you’re at it @neodreamzenie 🤍

[haechrry]

i was tagged by my bby @mrkis (my fav person) to put my "on repeat" playlist on shuffle and post the first ten songs:

1) life is still going on - nct dream

2) dangerous - mj

3) hello future - nct dream

4) ghost of you - 5sos

5) illicit affairs - taylor swift

6) message man - tøp

7) thank you for the venom - mcr

8) kids in the dark - atl

9) favorite - nct 127

10) butterfly - p1h

Tagging: apart from mrkis i dont know anyone here yet :( but i can tag @neochan even if dont know her (sorry love i hope you dont mind) !

[parallelroutes-ooc]

[ saving this here on account of now thriving and feeling validated ooc-wise and also just. very ♪ knowing neochan sent my url in too. it wasn't just me holding back and being hard on myself for the hundredth time. ]

[ GLAD YOU NOTICED! acknowledging how much wrong he did is So Tasty! and i'm so glad to hear it's going well! i like writing his dumb ass to match the whole arc more than what little space there was to visibly expand on this in the manga.

at first i liked him bc he's chaotic and weird (even if i don't end up having the chance to rp that much and it gets stuck to fanfics) BUT with him having SO MUCH angst potential... he is Fun.

... even though he is incredibly difficult to understand at first glance, lmao :') it almost never ends. someone once posted the more you understand him, it gets both easier and harder to make sense of it. i so agree.

that said, i have my beef with that kind of fanfic portrayal too tbh. i think it's about people not taking him seriously in fanfics and just using him as a plot/ship device based on only 1-2 other characters' perception? something like that.

meanwhile, i adore the other people ive met/seen who are also passionate about him ie. doubles and people from my fandom blog. there's just something about him that's just difficult to grasp and seeing people who know that and still vibe specifically with him? hell yeah!

ANYWAY rambling aside! yes! i always feel self-conscious about rambling so being reminded it's actually enjoyable is also very ♪-worthy. i am looking forward to putting down more brainrot down in your general direction now that i know it's appreciated!

tysm for all the kind words in general too!! it is so so appreciated and i need to save this somewhere too tbh.

... anyway here's wonderwall (strums guitar) ! ]

Send me a URL and I’ll share some positivity about them- accepting!

.Whiskey. Got this one twice so answering it like this as it was sent by both @queenharumiura and @parallelroutes-ooc

Moth, I love you so much! Your portrayal of Byakuran has given my Sho so much life. I love hearing people get excited about their muses like you do. I love just chilling on discord and listening to the headcanons you have and discussing things without any pressure or strain, you're so easy to plot with and it makes things so much easier.

I could spend all night just chatting with you and listening to you get engaged in your headcanons and world building and hearing the differences in how you see Byakuran from canon. It's so cool hearing the different headcanons you come up with. The dash comm tonight had me laughing into tears at the fashion crimes comments. Seeing his interactions with Haru is different as we saw canonically she didn't really interact with him, it was the guys because of -motions to everything going on TYL- I also love that you understand Byakuran and that the smile is a lie and in 2 seconds flat he can go straight to kill mode depending on the setting and verse. I like that you also have Shioryuu too as some of the box animals can play a part in the plot too, Uri isn't thrilled to see him but I am lol.

Another thing I love is that you want to acknowledge his wrongs and fix it, as we mentioned, there is a lot that needs fixed between him and Shoichi before they can have a stable relationship otherwise it's toxic and basically forced by Stockholm syndrome. You don't know how many times I've seen this ship portrayed as toxic in fics and it made me want to cry. I am so happy you agreed that they both need to heal first and Sho needs to acknowledge that Byakuran did actually do wrong and hurt him and not be so quick and easy to forgive. You are acknowledging that yes you write a villain, and not all of them get their redemption arc so quickly. And that's my favorite thing about your portrayal, you're making him more realistic by acknowledging his wrongdoings and not just glossing them over easily.

Could say more but I'm gonna cut it here and just say that I love your portrayal and enjoy talking with you as a friend too and hope to write more with you for a long time!

@parallelroutes

[zh-lele]

Playing Games

You didn't yet see my worth, so you try to play me. But I was so in love that I just got a little bit too complicated.

▪︎ Summary: A chaotic New Year's party makes you rethink the kind of relationship you've been having with Donghyuck for the past few months. He is a player, but you love the game.

▪︎ Pairing: Lee Donghyuck x female reader

▪︎ Genres: friends with benefits, smut, angst

▪︎ Word count: 7.4k (I'm so sorry.)

▪︎ Warnings: explicit sexual content, MINORS DO NOT INTERACT; profanity; substance consumption; toxic behavior. (Please let me know if I missed something.)

Listen to the playlist here. | Click to see Hyuck's moodboard.

Author's note: This is my secret santa gift for @neochan as part of the event hosted by @neowritingsnet . Hey Sam, I was your secret santa! Happy holidays and I hope you can enjoy the fic :) Didn't have the time to get it proof read so I'm really sorry about that.

Lolo.

1. Forget about it, forget about him

"How are you surviving the New Year's party?"

Your question takes Rina by surprise, since you see her get a little scared when she hears your voice from behind. But, seeing that it's only you, it doesn't take long for that beautiful smile that characterizes her to reappear.

"It's going really well, I think." She answers by returning her gaze to the front, where your group of friends is preparing for the main event of the night.

It's exactly two minutes to midnight. You know this not only because of the gigantic TV screen in the living room of the mansion—that has been broadcasting the countdown to the new year in different parts of the world since you arrived at the boys' house— but because you can also feel it in the air.

Aeri is helping Mia bring the glasses into the living room and set them ready for the cocktail party. Donghyuck is arguing with Jaemin because he's not helping Jisung with the Champagne bottles he's too scared to open. Chenle's laughter can be heard from the kitchen followed by some groans, and Mark telling him "it's not funny at all". You only find out what the mess is about when Jeno comes and lights up the room with his eye smile, telling the guys that Mark splashed his own eyes cutting the lime for the margaritas, and now he can't see anything.

You and Renjun share a cigarette on the balcony, now with Rina on your side.

"You know things are about to get weird, right?" Renjun asks the girl.

"Yeah, the other girls warned me you have this tradition going on," she starts. "No one leaves without a kiss from your New Year's parties." And her face flushes red as he finishes the sentence with his eyes locked on Donghyuck, who is finally pouring the champagne into the glasses with a smirk, looking as handsome as ever.

The action doesn't go unnoticed by you or Renjun, so you decide to push the new girl a little more. "You've got someone in mind?"

"Well…" She laughs, and without taking her eyes off him, she drops it: "I might go for Donghyuck."

The clock strikes midnight and the cheers are heard, both inside the mansion and outside in the street. As you approach inside to celebrate and drink the champagne together with your friends, you are surprised and intercepted by your friend Aeri, who plants a quick New Year's kiss on your lips before throwing herself into her boyfriend's arms and doing the same with him. You just laugh it off and empty the drink in your glass to set your eyes on a different pair meters away from you.

Rina had been the newest addition to the group, and obviously, before inviting her to the mansion and one of the chaotic New Year's Eve parties, someone had to warn her how things were. It was only fair that Rina was aware of an agreement made years ago between you and your friends: everyone gets at least one midnight kiss during the new year celebration. She was told just enough to try to survive the night.

The mansion is the boys' rented house and private studio. All of them have been making good amounts of money in the music industry lately, gaining popularity really fast, and it's a privilege that she isn't paying anymore to enter a party in the mansion.

It wasn't her fault that no one told her that something has been going on between you and Donghyuck for months, and that you were hoping that he wouldn't kiss anyone but you that night. When you didn't tell Rina anything as soon as she said she wanted to go for him, you were only waiting to test Donghyuck.

Because if you think about the situation, it was all his fault, honestly.

Everyone in your friend group knows Donghyuck and you have been exclusively seeing each other for months now. Your girl friends know very well he isn't afraid to fill your ears with sweet things and words of affection when you are alone. Yet, he won't show you around and would act like you're no more than friends when there's someone else.

You still don't know what his problem is, but you are growing sick and tired of crying for nights because he won't talk to you. Instead, he would have you thinking you did something wrong to upset him or that he doesn't care about you anymore, to then come and act like he didn't just ignore you for days. But you aren't going to take your anger on Rina.

You are going to do it on Donghyuck later, definitely.

Lee Donghyuck, or one of the most recognized and well paid r&b artists from this new movement of kids coming up in the industry, making some of the best music of the continent independently. But for the ones who know him privately, he’s just a kid wasting a lot of talent and potential, who's only got a big ton of pressure on his shoulders and stacks of money he doesn't know how to spend more than on parties, alcohol, and drugs.

He’s also the boy you've been chasing and trying to get with for years. And now that you have him, you can't lose him just like that.

If he kisses Rina right in front of you and everyone else when he refuses to do that with you, that's going to be the straw that breaks the camel's back.

The white lights go down until it is only the colored lights hanging from the tall ceiling, and the Christmas lights taped on the wall that illuminate the room very dimly. You can appreciate some of your best friends still exchanging their midnight kisses. You can also spot Jaemin in one corner pouring out one margarita after another, and Donghyuck with Rina huddled against the wall in the other corner of the room. The millisecond he makes eye contact with you and smiles all the way from there, then returning his attention to Rina is actually what sets you on fire. Not in the way you would want to, though.

You don't need to stay there to know Donghyuck's gonna try and play you dirty. And you won't give him the satisfaction of standing there alone, watching him kiss with someone else.

You should have listened to your friends when they told you over and over again that Donghyuck is and always will be a player, not worth all your tears. You should have also heard your other side of consciousness telling you "don't do it, don't go there." But it's too late to regret it when you take the cup from Jaemin's hands and drink all of its contents, then grab the bottle of tequila and Jaemin's hand and drag him with you to the kitchen.

You know Donghyuck like the palm of your hand. You could try and play his games too.

When you set the tequila bottle on the kitchen counter and sit yourself on it to grab Jaemin by the collar and put him between your parted legs, the mischief reaches his eyes and reflects on the smirk of his mouth.

"I feel like we're not here for more margaritas," he says looking into your eyes and placing his hands on your thighs.

You give the bottle one last swallow before confirming his suspicions.

"You're right. Happy New Year."

Kissing Jaemin has always been a pleasure, in every sense of the word. His kisses are as lazy as he is, and feel as full of affection as if you were in love with each other, which makes you think about how there is no doubt why everyone falls in love with him so easily.

His lips taste like salt and lime, and explore yours sweetly until he opens his way to the inside of your mouth. There, the salty taste is replaced by a sweetness that contrasts with the rest of his movements. His hands caress your legs, look to get you closer to his body, squeezing your thighs and butt and making you approach the edge of the counter, but never completely losing that calm that characterizes him. Jaemin is the perfect definition of a tease.

"Thought we wouldn't be doing this anymore." You feel the vibrations of his vocal chords under your lips that leave his neck wet with kisses. When you don't answer him, he cups your face separating you from his skin, and makes you look him in the eyes. "Aren't you and Hyuck together?"

Well, that's a hard question. Because it seems like it depends on the situation and the mood. When Donghyuck feels like treating you like his girlfriend, you really feel like the luckiest girl in the world. He's sweet, caring, and funny. He comes to your home to share dinner with your family and spend the night, and you do the same at his. He even let you spend the entire Christmas day at the mansion—and you know that's something reserved for the couples only. You had morning sex, breakfast together, opened presents, and even cuddled while watching movies until it was dark outside.

You could say you are together only when he's feeling like giving you his attention. The rest of the time, you only try to figure out his feelings: when he will disappear for an entire day, won't talk to you for a week or will get mad if you go partying without him, but then flirt with other girls right in front of you.

Following that line of thought:

"No, we are not together." You finally tell Jaemin.

He only clicks his tongue and shakes his head, before moving closer to your ear to whisper. "That's a shame, because I think this would be much hotter if you were."

It sends a shiver down your spine and settles a strange feeling in your stomach at the same time. It's kind of frustrating, the way no matter how much you want to get Donghyuck out of your head and just have a good time with other boys, you can't get yourself to do it.

Donghyuck doesn't need to know, but it's not the first time you try forgetting you're mad at him with a little help from others. And that's the thing about it: that you only ever get to try, because the guilt takes over you despite how he has neglected and hurt you, and you end up going back to him over and over.

That unsettling feeling washes over you like a bucket of cold water, so you have to separate Jaemin from your lips before apologizing and rushing out of the kitchen to find your friends.

2. I think I wanna kiss you, right here in front of everybody

"You know what's your problem? You're always being too nice." Mia leans on the balcony railing with a joint between his lips, and stretches an open hand to you. The lighter lands on her palm and she's quickly lighting up the rolled paper, passing it to you after a couple of deep puffs.

"Well," you start exhaling the smoke. "That depends on who's saying it."

"You just need to fuck someone else, not letting remorse or sad feelings get in between. Just to know if you really wanna stop seeing Hyuck after it or not."

"But you don't understand," the lump in your throat can be noticed through your shaky voice, and the tears begin to threaten to fall from your eyes so Aeri—who has positioned herself in front of you and is covering you from the rest of the people inside the party—takes your hand and gives it a little comforting squeeze. "I've liked him for so long. I really, really only want to be with him."

"You really want to be with someone who's been making you cry for months now? I remember you having more sad than happy nights," Mia points out once again. You quickly dry your tears with your hands before they keep falling. "Even on fucking New Year's. New Year's party and you're crying over this dickhead." She says in disbelief.

"Must be some reaaally good dick if it got you this down bad."

The three of you manage to laugh at Aeri's comment, thankfully. You maintain the order of the round and pass the joint back to Aeri.

"It is," you confess, blowing out the smoke. "He really is that good."

"Does he at least make you cum?"

"Not all the time—"

"Then you have to leave him, sister." Mia interrupts. There's a smile on her face now that indicates she's just half-joking.

"But he's seriously so good!" You shake your head in frustration followed by an exasperated sigh. It's embarrassing to say it out loud, but your friends had known you for years, and they know that this talk and all the shed tears won't change a thing. "You know I'm not leaving him."

"Yeah, I know this conversation is fucking pointless." Mia's face is illuminated by the light from her cell phone when she takes it out ready to play one of her latest obsessions. Cats Café, a new game that locks her up in your bathroom for hours, playing seated on your toilet and leaving you and Aeri hanging out in the living room of your house, just the two of you during girls' nights. "Just please, try to keep in mind how bad you've had it the last few days the next time he tries to sugarcoat you with his words."

"You wouldn't be having such a bad time if you were going out with me, instead of him."

"Aeri, you literally have a boyfriend." You tell her with a roll of your eyes. 

"And you literally took my midnight kiss in front of him, with no complains," she replies to you. "And Mark told me he wouldn't care if I ever wanna try something with a girl!"

"Wait," you observe Mia pause his game and look up at your other friend with furrowed eyebrows. "You mean as in a threesome?"

"Who's having a threesome?" Donghyuck asks throwing his arm around Aeri's shoulders, and taking the drink out of her hands to empty it down his throat.

"The three of us," she answers looking at Donghyuck with a smile, and doing a circular motion with her hand pointing at you, Mia, and herself.

His eyes open up in astonishment when you laugh hearing Aeri's words, but an amused smile takes over his face at the same time. "That's extremely unfair, don't you think?"

"Want me to film it for you? So you don’t miss out." You ask him in return.

"I'd rather film you and me, alone." He says in a teasing tone.

"Okaaaaaay," Mia gets up from her place to shove her phone down her jean pockets and starts walking back inside. "Can't a girl play Cats Café in peace without having to listen to you being some horny motherfuckers all the time?!"

"Go get fucked, Mia." Donghyuck tells your friend and you get to punch him in the arm when he comes to stand to your left, which gets him laughing and complaining.

Mia only points her middle finger at him and yells something like “I'll ask your brother.” Next thing you know, Mark has joined Aeri on the balcony after communicating that Mia and Jeno have, in fact, taken over his room to do God knows what, and you are lighting up the second joint of the night with Donghyuck standing very close to your side. 

The four of you smoke in silence until there are only a few puffs left before it goes out. When the stub comes back to you, you light it again sure you'll be the one to finish it off.

Donghyuck watches you exhale the smoke from your lungs and then looks down at the joint between your fingers. He's not going to ask for it, so you raise your hand to the level of his mouth and position the end of it between his lips—which feel as soft as ever, and he leaves a little tempting kiss on your fingertips.

A few meters away from you the party is still going on. Sweaty bodies, blinding colored lights, and wet tongues that move to the rhythm of an ear-piercing song played by Renjun. He is a genius, the best of them all when it comes to producing music, and it shows in the way he makes you feel like your heart is gonna come out of your chest when he plays with the console.

It could be the music, the weed, the alcohol, the boy in front of you—who is looking into your eyes like you're the only one at the party, as if you were his favorite and he hadn't had multiple girls hitting on him all night—or a mix of all that, but you start to believe he got you hypnotized. You know you could have anyone else too, but it's never enough if they aren't Donghyuck.

He takes a hit making it burn until he hurts your fingers, so you have to move them away from his lips. However, the pain isn't enough to bring you back to reality, and a little touch on his lips doesn't calm the incessant desire you have to kiss him—it shows in the dilated pupils of your eyes that look for his gaze, in your agitated breathing, and in his sly smile as if he was reading all your thoughts.

What does it take to break Lee Donghyuck?

The tension can be felt in the air, so your friends are quick to leave the two of you alone in the balcony, maybe hoping you would sort your feelings out.

"Kiss me? Please, kiss me."

After throwing the end of the joint to the floor, he gently caresses your face with his nose and hugs your waist to get you closer, forcing you to cross your arms behind his neck.

You continue begging in his ear. "No more hiding, Hyuck."

His nose reaches your neck where you feel him plant a subtle wet kiss and then leave an intense bite. His teeth scraping your skin while his two hands squeeze your butt, drawing you firmly into his body. One last suck to your neck that you're sure will be leaving a mark, and then he's getting off you, staring down as if nothing just happened.

"Just came here to tell you we'll be leaving to Yangyang's."

Donghyuck lights up a cigarette and goes back inside without another word, probably hoping you'll go after him since that's what you've gotten him used to; you can't deny it.

You often feel like his babysitter and his mother at the same time: making sure that he won't make stupid decisions when he's out and intoxicated, that he won't miss any important schedules, that he can communicate himself better with his friends and family. You've been Donghyuck's unconditional support from the day you met, but since he's shown nothing in return it has started to feel like a burden. Like trying to make an already grown man grow. You know that it isn't your responsibility, though, and that he isn't likely to change for good.

You can't break Lee Donghyuck, but you still like to try.

3. Tell her sweet lies

A quick stop before heading to the after-party at Yangyang's has Donghyuck's car sitting in the McDonald's parking lot, while he and Rina order takeout after you said you were feeling extremely hungry. It's you and Mia waiting inside, sitting on the heated seats with music blasting from the stereo.

You've made sure to make the ride awkward enough for Rina after you saw her with Donghyuck, caressing the nape of his neck and hair and squeezing his thigh as he drove in front of her. You know it's not an idea that Donghyuck likes too much, but the anger caused by his rejection combined with the desinhibition caused by the weed has you making bad decisions.

Donghyuck has left his phone unlocked for you to be able to change the music while he's gone. So you take the opportunity to enter his text messages and look for you and Mia's names through the chats.

Multiple results from the times you have been mentioned appear instantly. Some are funny ones, some are the result of important conversations in your group chat, and others are part of the private chats between Donghyuck and some of the boys.

"Did you know Yangyang talks about you to Donghyuck?" You ask Mia with a smirk.

"Oh my god!" She rips the phone out of your hands before you can get to read what it's about. "You're not reading that out loud."

Her pupils narrow when she brings the light of the screen closer to his eyes, to read the conversations between her "best friend" and Donghyuck. You immediately think that there can't be anything wrong with it because of the smile that Mia can't contain while she scrolls down the screen.

Mia throws the phone back at you and hides her blushed face on her hands before you can make fun at her.

"What is it?" You ask laughing. “Are you ever gonna stop messing around with other boys and confess to him?”

"I think he likes me," she says now looking at you, her cheeks still red from the temperature.

"Yeah, I think so too. I think he fucks you for a reason."

"Shut up! What does it say about you?"

You laugh once more and grab the phone, making sure to touch the screen before it locks up. The first mention of your name is from a chat from tonight, in which Donghyuck asked you if you wanted him to pick you up to go to the mansion. A few more meaningless mentions in your private conversation with him here and there. Some pictures and messages that you exchange that there's no chance to reveal. Lastly, you find several mentions of you in a private chat with Jaemin, which makes you curious so you open it to read the full conversations.

"There's something off here," you tell Mia with a furrow of your brows.

A little bit of concern is shown in her voice after watching your expression. "Huh? What is it?"

"He's been talking to Jaemin… And Jaemin asked if we've fucked." You tell your friend without stopping from scrolling through Donghyuck's phone, a deeper frown taking over your face the more you read his conversations with Jaemin that involve you.

"What did Hyuck say?"

"'I fucked her so good she won't go looking for you or any other guy ever again.'" You read Donghyuck's reply to Jaemin out loud. So that means he knew about you and Jaemin all this time. "'She gets so desperate for me it makes me sick, you can't imagine how much she cums when she's riding me–"

"I think that's enough." Mia scratches the phone from your hands and blocks it to prevent you from reading any more texts. A short silence falls between the two of you before she's speaking again. "I saw them kiss at midnight."

"Who?"

"Donghyuck and Rina."

Disgust quickly takes over your face and you feel like throwing up, the hunger you felt earlier leaving your body in an instant. It's been too much in such a short period of time.

The atmosphere in the car becomes awkward once more, a heavy trap base being the only sound filling the space. You don't really want to turn to look at the backseat where Mia sits because your teary eyes would give you away. You have known her long enough to be sure she won't hesitate destroying Donghyuck's car with a bat this time if she ever sees you crying because of him, again. And once you finally have such a good and stable group of friends, you don't want to ruin it just because you wanted to get involved with one of them and it turned out wrong.

You also knew who you were messing with since the start, but you still decided to ignore everything that Hyuck is and fall into lust and believe in his promises.

"He also said he doesn't really like me."

"Now that's ridiculous." Mia lets out a scoff.

You shrug, "It's what it said. That I’m only a good fuck."

"Hyuck has been seeing you for months, and you are going to believe what a silly text message says?" You feel Mia place her torso between the two front seats to try to meet your gaze while questioning you. "You know Hyuck becomes an asshole when he's with Jaemin," she continues. "He would say whatever bullshit to try to look cool–"

"But we haven't been doing so well lately."

"He likes you," she still tries to reassure you.

"Mia, it's fine. I don't care." You cut her off, crossing your arms and sulking in the passenger's seat. That tense silence keeps falling between both of you until she decides to speak.

"You can be sad about it, you know, he was being an asshole." She tells you in a much calmer tone, placing a hand on your left shoulder.

"I said it's fine." You turn to look at her the moment Donghyuck makes it back to the car with Rina, and takes his seat behind the steering wheel, passing the bags of takeout to Mia and placing yours in the middle of the car. Your eyes never meet Mia or Rina though, falling on Donghyuck's subtle smile, and getting lost in his glazed up eyes until you decide to lie to yourself for the millionth time that night. "I don't like him anyway."

Donghyuck looks a little lost as his eyes start wondering from you to Mia after hearing that last sentence. "Who's this guy we don't like?" You only smile in return, and ask him to take you home because you are too tired and intoxicated. He's quick to comply with your request, answering in a sweet and even more intoxicating tone than every other substance you had that night. "Of course, baby."

The car ride is awfully quiet when Donghyuck drops Mia and Rina at Yangyang's and, after a weird exchange of looks between Hyuck and the boys, the two of you continue your way to your house.

The night has gone from bad to terribly bad, and you're not sure how much longer you can take. After reflecting on every conversation you had with your friends tonight, you finally decide to speak.

"I think we should quit it."

He stops the car at the door of your house and looks at you with a crooked eyebrow. "What?" The disgust is evident in the tone of his voice.

"I just–" you struggle to take the words out. You aren't sure if you should tell him how hurt it made you that he talks like that about you with his friends, without shame or respect for your privacy. You aren't sure if you can reproach him for having been with other girls when you have also done it, when he has made clear you two are nothing more than fuck buddies, and when you agreed on it. "I know we'll never be in a real relationship, but I don't think you're treating me right, okay?"

Donghyuck lets out a scoff and his hands fall off the steering wheel like dead-weight. An expression on his face that tells you he's already done with this conversation. "What the fuck are you talking about?"

"That it feels like I'm a game to you? That you only want me around when your dick is in need or whatever?"

"I just spent like a hundred on food for you and your friends. Again, what the fuck are you talking about?"

"And I don't want your fucking food, okay? I don't care how much money you spend on me," you say looking at him with teary eyes at this point. "What if I just want a hug, a kiss, a little affection, huh? Just that you care for me all the time, you know?"

"Baby," Donghyuck looks for your hands and you let him intertwine your fingers over the middle of the car. "But I show you my affection all the time," he says with a sweeter tone now.

"But not in front of others," you shake your head. He squeezes your hands and his thumbs caress the back of your hands, making it even harder to contain all your emotions. "It's like you're scared of others finding out, like you're ashamed. When literally everyone knows we're seeing each other."

"We've kissed in front of others multiple times."

"Yeah, but all those times you've been drunk off your ass and high as a kite. Like I'm just a random girl for you to hook-up at parties."

Donghyuck bites his lower lip to contain a smile, and gets closer to you to speak in your ear. "What if I told you you make me nervous when I'm sober?"

"Get off, you're ridiculous."

"But you know you are the only one I really like."

That's what makes you stop fighting him to search for his eyes. You know it isn't the best option, that he always tricks you into thinking whatever he wants when he looks at you oh so sweetly, even if he makes no sense, but you are hoping to finally find the truth somehow.

"Some things tell me otherwise. Mia told me–"

"Your friends are lying to you, might be trying to fuck up what we have."

“She told me you kissed Rina.”

“I didn’t,” he says. “I swear I didn’t. Nothing happened between me and her.”

His gaze is cold and his lips a straight line devoid of emotion, while he still holds you by the arms preventing you from getting out of the car. And that sentence feels like it's enough to ruin all the good things you've been through together. He keeps lying, talking about your intimacies with his friends, ignoring your feelings, and pretending that he really cares about you.

You open the car door and get out to slam it again, pretty sure it might leave the lock damaged. Outside the temperature is very low despite the fact that it is about to dawn, the sky turning purple and slowly turning off the stars. So you rush to open the door of your house before freezing outside, but especially because you hear Donghyuck get out of the car too and call your name closer and closer, indicating that he has no intention of ending the talk yet.

4. She knows what I am, and she loves and evades what I am

"I'm staying over." He says making his way through your door, shutting it and blocking it once the two of you are inside.

"No you're not." The walk down to your room gets constantly interrupted by him trying to reach for you and stopping you from moving any more. He grabs your arms to get you to look at him, so when he finally makes you turn around and you see his face, you break down. "Fuck you, Donghyuck! I told you you're not staying."

"Yeah, I am. And I'mma fuck you silly."

"No you're fucking not."

"Gonna take all that anger out of you."

"Fuck you, asshole." You almost spit in his face trying to talk to him at his same height.

"Is that what you want?" He asks, grabbing your jaw with one hand and forcing you to keep the eye contact, the other hand placing you flush from his body. "Fuck you so good you don't even understand why you got so mad in the first place?"

Your eyes fall to his gripped teeth and to his lips, wet with spit from all the previous arguing looking more tempting than usual.

You have to admit that, if you really think about it, it didn't make much sense why you got so mad at him. He already made it clear to you that absolutely nothing happened between him and Rina or anyone else all night while you, instead, jumped to conclusions and went looking for unwarranted revenge.

Maybe you and Mia thought he was being an asshole and was making fun of you when, in reality, that isn't much like Hyuck. What if it really was just a stupid conversation between boys? What if it was his way of showing off, of presuming to Jaemin about your relationship because he felt proud of you?

Because if he supposedly gets as sick of you as he said in the text messages, then why would he decide to be with you again?

A gasp comes out from your open mouth when you feel his hand squeezing on your ass and pushing you even closer to him.

"I just want you to be honest with me." You reply in a whisper. The smile that gets over his features is wicked, and his left hand tightens his grip around your face one last time before he shoves you to the bed.

An airy laugh comes out of him. "Silly girl gets angry and if I fuck her she calms down."

He gets over you placing both hands on the sides of your head and looks into your eyes once more. But there's something different this time. His look is so soft and tender it makes you want to tear up a little. It might show, because Donghyuck pouts lightly before opening his mouth to swear to you: "You know I'd never hurt you on purpose."

It's hard to trust him. But it's also hard to believe he would dare lie to you while looking at you in the eyes that way. So you only grab his locks and pull to give him a kiss full of emotion. There's passion, there's anger, there's pain and there's so much obsession it could be mistaken for love.

His palm travels up and down from your sides, caressing and squeezing firmly, to your back under your top until he unties the straps and gets it out of the way. His fingers explore and touch all the newly exposed skin sending shivers down your spine. He kisses you back aggressively, making you pull on his hair like you know he likes and feeling him grow hard above you.

His hands start to undo the buttons of your jeans and he slides his fingers under it and over your skin, massaging your ass, grinding on you even more.

Small whimpers leave from you and mix with the sighs coming out from his mouth. You take a moment to remove your pants completely, tossing them to the side and quickly starting to get Donghyuck out of his.

When his hands move up again, he gets them under the straps of your panties and moves them down, freeing you from the fabric, parting your legs and giving your clit direct contact with his boxers.

It's always too easy when he's alone with you. He knows perfectly when to kiss you and where to touch you to make you want more of him—an expert of your body, always looking for you to have the best time.

Guilt takes over you for the second time tonight, remembering how selfish you were earlier when you went looking out for his friend, and then getting mad at him when Donghyuck has really been nothing but the sweetest when it's just the two of you.

What was the problem with keeping things private? What was your obsession with him showing you off? You never considered he’s a public figure and he might like his privacy, to keep things on the low because of his fans, the paparazzi and the media who’s never got anything nice to say about him and your friends.

When you get away from him all of a sudden, there's a remaining blush on his cheeks as his lustful but confused eyes follow you, until you get on the floor and land on your knees in between his legs. His pupils expand as you tug on his boxer, grab his semi-hard cock and lick the tip of it. As soon as you repeatedly run your tongue around it, you hear him groan deeply. Not much time passes until he is fully hard while you keep moving your hand along his dick, squeezing and passing your thumb over the tip making Donghyuck hiss, and he pushes your head down to make you wrap your mouth around him one more time.

"Fuuuck baby," he groans one more time before grabbing your shoulders and pushing you away.

You look at him with shiny eyes, your lips red and moisturized with his pre-cum. And because of the way his chest moves up and down from the heavy breathing and the look he's giving you, you think Donghyuck might come just at the sight of you.

He doesn't waste another second to attach your mouths in a desperate kiss, leading you to lay on top of the bed once again. His weight on your body maintains your back pressed against the mattress, and he makes room between your legs. You're sure he's more than ready for you, but you know he always wants to make sure you are fully ready for him. His digits tease your entry and you whine in desperation to just have him. 

"Hyuck," you can't help but cry his name.

"What?" He asks as his fingers keep going in and out of you. The feeling of his lips on yours help you momentarily stop from moaning and complaining.

When he finally breaks the kiss to breathe, you manage to speak. "Quit teasing and fuck me."

He only grins at you and you can finally feel the head of his cock replacing his fingers in your pussy. But he doesn't push in yet. Instead, his fingers coated in your juices come in contact with your lips and somehow you know what he wants.

"Did you have fun playing the angry girlfriend with me?" He comes closer and whispers in your ear as you open your mouth and suck them for him. "Silly girl. Look at you, you are so beautiful." Donghyuck talks in between wet kisses that move from your cheeks to your neck. "How could you believe what your friends say?"

A moan escapes you—whether because of his actions or his words, it doesn't matter too much, because he slams his dick into you, taking away all the air from your lungs.

The oxygen only reaches your blood again once he slightly pulls off to bottom out immediately after, setting a steady pace. You are restricted from making any sounds, as his fingers are still on your mouth while he keeps pleasuring you, obliging you to suck and bite at them because he just feels too good.

Once again, you think every doubt you ever had about him before was dumb, as there isn't a possibility he would want to make you feel this good if he didn't like you at all.

His girth is perfectly adjustable to you and quick to form a knot on the low of your stomach. It would suddenly disappear when he completely pulls out of you and grabs your hips to turn you around, making you stand on your elbows and knees. With your head down on the mattress and ass up in the air, Donghyuck doesn't waste another second and gets inside you.

His thrusts are slow and deep, way too deep. This position allows him perfectly to play with your clit and to squeeze your breasts at the same time, quickly sending you over the edge in a minute, then stopping completely, then stimulating you to the limit over again.

When he finally gets his hands off your body completely, you start to accelerate the pace on your own, fucking yourself on his dick before Donghyuck interrupts suggesting you move to straddle him.

He's quick to get himself sitting with his back against the bed frame, then dragging you to sit comfortably on top of him. Hyuck rubs the head of his dick back and forth between your folds, reaching your clit repeatedly and spreading your wetness all over him, making you whine in the process.

"Hyuck, please." You are a panting mess on top of him, moving yourself to keep the friction stimulating you and sighing dreamily. 

He lets you grind and stimulate your clit through his length for a bit, taking his shirt off in the process and going back to massaging your boobs. You whimper when he manages to sink you down on him without a warning, which makes you fall forward and rest the side of your head on his chest, your ear right above where his heart should be.

His arms embrace your body and press you against his chest that is warm, allowing you to hear the rhythm of his heart, slow and controlled, like you could find all the right answers by just listening to it.

"I would make love to you," he whispers, "but you made me mad with your little scene."

"Hyuck, don't be like that." Your eyes fall shut trying to hold back the tears, when at the same time you desperately want to see his satisfied smile hearing you cry and moan his name as he rolls his hips, stretching your walls again and again without having started to move back and forth again. "Hyuck, fucking move!" You ask desperately, sitting and trying to bounce on him but his hands on your waist keep you in place, glued to his torturing hips.

A strong smack on your right ass cheek makes another filthy sound escape from your lips right before you hear his voice. "Talk to me nicely," he warned.

"Do that again." 

Your plea makes him smile and move your ass up a bit to give you the first thrust after a while. His palm violently comes in contact with your cheek one more time and you fall even forward, hiding your face on his neck and whispering all the praises you could think of in his ear.

"That's it," he says as he continues hitting all the right spots inside you.

When his hand slides between your bodies and finds your clit you can't contain yourself anymore and fully sit on top of him to take a little bit of control, riding him while you chase your orgasm.

Even when you start begging for it over and over, he doesn't say a thing at your tireless plea. He knows you are once again at the verge of it by the way your inner walls clench around him. Instead, he keeps stimulating your clit while squeezing and sucking your boobs. Sitting in the middle of his bed with his dick buried inside you, he makes you work for it until you are coming all over him.

You keep moving, supporting yourself with your arms wrapped around his neck and riding out your orgasm until you feel the cold air hit your nipples, wet with the warmth of Hyuck's mouth before he was moaning out his own orgasm.

"Love you," he places a kiss at the top of your head, and caresses you gently along your back down to your thighs. "You're so, so beautiful."

You open your eyes and take a look at your surroundings while still hiding your face on Donghyuck's neck. Things look blurry and you feel a little dizzy. You're breathing heavily, but not only because of the amazing angry-make up sex you two just had. You're coming back to your senses, and your chest hurts and your eyes sting from holding on the tears; it's everything that happened this night taking over you all at once.

A sip from your nose is what gives you away and makes Donghyuck laugh.

"Aw, baby," he says with a squeeze on your asscheek. "Fucked you so good I got you crying?" Donghyuck takes your face in his hands and forces you to look into his eyes. His thumbs wipe away the thick tears that fall down your cheeks with care, and he kisses the pout on your lips over and over again, until they form a straight line. "Shh, it's okay baby. I know you didn't mean to get mad at me."

You shake your head and open your mouth, determined to speak, to tell him that things can no longer work like this, but you are interrupted by his lips and his hands making you start to move again on his dick, still buried deep inside you.

"I love you," he repeats in between kisses, and you moan. "I love you. Happy New Year."

And this time you shake your head in agreement, up and down in the same way that Donghyuck starts to move your body on him, hoping he would just shut up and stop lying for once. But you try to convince yourself that if you do it all again, that if you choose to keep seeing him, there will be just lust. No playing games, no believing in promises, no loving him, but lust. Because you can't let him go just like that.

Happy holidays everyone! If you liked this fic, please let me know. Feedback is always appreciated.

[rainyjeno]

thank you to @neochan for being my bestie and editing this for me

PAIRING | jaehyun x reader

SYNOPSIS | you're a princess and jaehyun is your knight.

WC | 5.5K

WARNINGS | overuse of the word princess, sexy time with jaehyun, mark is an asshole

A/N | lmao this took me like a year to finally write but enjoy!

The walls of your room were painted a deep brown, but the furniture was pure white. The color seemed to brighten up the room. You sighed sitting up in your bed. You wanted out. Out of this castle, out of this arrangement, just out. You fluffed your pale pink dress, looking at yourself in the mirror, your bed was disheveled in the background and you cursed yourself for making the maids work harder. You pushed your hair back slightly before turning on your heels, slipping on your shoes, and pressing an ear to the door softly. Once you were sure there was no one in the halls you made your way out of the door and began walking towards the library.

There was never much light in the castle, a few candles here and there but the most light came from outside. As the moon shone through the large windows, you couldn’t help but stop and admire the garden you’d taken so much time attending to with your gardeners. The tulips were blossoming before your eyes. You let out a small giggle before continuing with your journey to the library. 

A small gust of wind stopped you in your tracks as you shivered slightly, cursing yourself for not bringing a cover. “Princess?” You’d heard the voice of your favorite knight, rolling your eyes slightly as you nodded, a signal that it was you. “I thought your father said you were supposed to stay in tonight?” Jaehyun raised his eyebrow at you before holding his hand out for you to take. 

You let out a soft sigh before taking his hand carefully. “Well, I don’t always have to do what my father says now do I?” You smirked up at the taller boy before tugging him along, “If you must be on watch duty for me then you must accompany me to the library, I want to read again.” You watched Jaehyun’s face tighten, his eyebrows raised and mouth serious, he opened them to object before you quickly shushed him. “I am the princess aren’t I?” You spoke as he followed you around watching you make your way to the library. As you entered the library the only light came from the many desk lamps that were scattered around, you could see his face once again, the way his jaw clenched slightly, your eyes trailed down to his hands and then back up to his face as you made your way towards the bookshelves. You smiled up at him as you plucked a book off the shelf before sitting on the floor, your back leaning against the bookcase. Jaehyun stood, this wasn’t the first time you’d done this with him, but he’d always waited for the invite to sit with you. “C’mon Jae… you know you can sit.” you patted the spot next to you as he took a seat. 

“When will you learn Princess, you’re going to get me in trouble.” He murmured as you began to read to him. The smile never left his face. On the outside, he was just your Knight, assigned to keep you safe. It was his destiny, his father and grandfather before him served your family, nobody suspected he’d fallen in love with you as he never let it be known. Many outsiders knew that you were beautiful, and you had many suitors, but knowing you were betrothed to another man kept them away. So Jaehyun kept his love to himself. He never let you know his feelings to not hurt yours. He smiled down at you as you nuzzled yourself into his shoulder as you continued to read the story to him. He adored the way your eyes would light up when you read, your soft and airy voice could soothe him to sleep if he allowed it. 

You stopped, looking up at him you spoke, “What will you do once I'm married off? Will you find a new princess to watch over?” You raised your eyebrows as you stood up placing the book back on the shelf and holding a hand out to help him up even though he didn’t need it. He took your hand using it to help him stand up, his height making him taller as he looked down at you now. 

“I suppose I’ll come with you, but only if your new husband allows it.” He smirked at you causing you to roll your eyes and shove him slightly. It was nearing one in the morning, you should get back to your room but something wanted to keep you there with Jaehyun. He made you feel safer than your bedroom ever could. You let out a small yawn before stretching your arms as you began the walk back to your room. 

“...and what if my husband disapproves or has another Knight lined up to take care of me?” You asked, watching his face fall. “I’m just kidding, I’m sure he’ll approve, you’ve been my favorite since I was sixteen he can’t make you leave.” You let out a smile towards him before walking off, running your fingers over the books that lay on the shelves, your fingers touching every one. “Would you do the honor of escorting me to my room?” you held out your hand smiling up at him as he took it in his. 

“It would be my pleasure.” He beamed as he walked with you towards your room, he’s escorted you there many times. Silently hoping one night you’d be bold enough to invite him in, but never asking on his own. 

The two of you walked, hand in hand down the hallway, only stopping to admire the flowers once more, you never would notice the way Jaehyun’s eyes traced your skin, from the top of your head to the tips of your toes he admired you, adoring the way your nose scrunched when you laughed, or the way your lips curled when you smiled, no detail went unnoticed. He let out a small sigh when you arrived at your door, you let out a matching sigh before thanking him. “Princess?” he questioned, causing you to look over at him. 

“Hmm?” you hummed in response, your eyes meeting his as you gulped slightly a soft blush covered your cheeks, an unfamiliar heat. He never used to make you feel this way, why was this happening now, before you were to be married. 

He shook his head, “Nothing nevermind, I hope you have a restful night.” He flashed a smile before turning away from you making his way back down the hall towards his quarters. You watched him, your eyes softening, you felt like something was missing, you didn’t believe that he just wanted you to have a good night, something was hidden behind his beautiful smile if only you could figure out what. You made your way back into your room, the only thing on your mind was Mark and your wedding tomorrow, which some part of you was dreading. 

___

You’d first met Mark when you were eighteen, you wouldn’t call it love at first sight but the first night in the garden where you laid under the stars with him, although feels like forever ago, was written on your heart forever. The stars seemed to shine brighter that night, the air was cool as it engulfed the two of you. He pointed out all the constellations that he wanted you to see, but you were forever mesmerized by his face. The way his brown eyes sparkled in the moonlight. Oddly enough while you were admiring him, a certain knight was admiring you, and the way your eyes brightened when you talked to Mark about your dreams, or the way your nose scrunched when you giggled at him kissing your nose. Jaehyun could only long to be the one with you. He knew he’d never have you the way Mark did, but at least he’d get to admire you from afar. 

Somehow you knew he’d never feel the same way about you, but the more you spent time together you couldn’t help but fall for him. His kind words, the way his hand laid on the small of your back as he escorted you to the dance floor during your annual ballroom parties. Mark's eyes were always on someone else. You could never pinpoint where but they were never on you. As the few years between your eighteenth and twenty-first passed Mark was more and more distant, little did you know he was slowly falling for someone else. 

“Mark, we can’t be caught together… I have a duty to the princess.” You could barely make out the girl's voice, as you stopped yourself from turning the corner to listen, but that didn’t stop you from taking a peek. You watched him lean into her slightly, “Mark…” the girl giggled, speaking his name as Mark peppered her face in kisses. That was the moment your heart shattered, you knew he was never truly going to be yours. You turned away from them, your body slamming into your Knight, a small noise coming from your lips as you looked up at him, tears forming in your eyes. You watched his eyebrows raise as you held your fingers to his lips to keep him quiet. 

“Take me away from here.” You whispered, your voice hushed, as your eyes pleaded with him not to look around the corner, “Please don’t..” You whispered, but unfortunately, Jaehyun never listened. He peeked around the corner only to see your almost-husband kissing your seamstress. He let out a small sigh, almost as if he knew. 

“I’m sorry.” Was the only thing he could say before he ushered you away from the situation that never should have happened. 

___

You never wanted to be married this young, but twenty-one was almost the standard in your kingdom. You had always hoped to change that when you eventually became queen, but when you were young and one of the greatest storms hit your kingdom, the neighboring kingdoms agreed to help, under one condition, on the princess’ twenty-first birthday she was to be wed to the prince of Oryn. Your parents reluctantly agreed because the kingdom needed their help, so marrying their daughter off seemed like the only way to go.       

The morning following your night with Jaehyun was your day to be wed. Your seamstress Hana made her way into your room. “Good morning princess, I’m sorry for waking you but well it is your wedding day.” She spoke, her voice was much softer than yours, you sat up in your bed glaring at her upset at her for waking you but knowing she was only doing her job. You let out a soft huff pushing the pillow into your face before finally sitting up and looking at Hana. She was beautiful, her flowy black hair was always tied up neatly and her brown eyes were to die for. You stood up and looked at yourself in the mirror. 

“Alright Hana, let's get me ready to get married.” You whispered your voice soft as you examined your face. Your makeup from yesterday was slightly smudged due to you taking it off messily. “Where shall we start? With my hair? Or maybe my makeup?” You questioned looking over to her, she was slighter shorter than you in height barely an inch, but she smiled up at you before taking your hands in hers nodding. 

“I will make you a beautiful bride.” She glanced at your engagement ring, it was a silver band with a shiny red ruby for the center. It didn’t take a scientist to see she was envious of how beautiful it was, and the fact that she may never have someone the way you had Mark despite feeling as if he didn’t love you the way you grew to love him. You nodded, before sitting in your chair allowing her to begin on your makeup. You’d never mention the nights you’d caught her with Mark to her, you had to put on a brave face for your family, your kingdom depended on you and Mark getting married. Your makeup was done subtly, your dress was tighter fitting at the top and flowed down towards the bottom, it had a slight pink hue to it but you adored the way it looked on you. Your hair was in a simple updo and suddenly it was time for you to make your way down the aisle. 

The wedding was simple and elegant, the colors champagne and white surrounded the room. White flowers on every table, and by the end of it you were his. “I Do.” and a gentle kiss on your lips by the man who you were supposed to spend the rest of your life with felt like nothing. You felt nothing for him anymore, but your kingdom depended on you to keep your end of the deal. So you put on a smile and went on with the wedding antics. Everyone had speeches about how cute you two were as kids, and how everyone knew one day you would be married, and quite honestly, you were getting bored with this. 

Soon enough the music would resume and everyone was up dancing with one another during the slower songs, your new husband took your hand carefully almost as if asking you to dance. You nodded, as you stood up walking with him to the dance floor. He pulled you close to him as you two swayed together. “Are you okay? You’ve been quiet all day..” Mark whispered to you as he leaned in, his voice close to your ear. 

You let out a small sigh, “I’m alright Mark… today has just been long.” you replied as he slid his arm around your waist pulling you a bit closer to him. Mark had been watching Jaehyun watch you the entire night. Not that Mark was in love with you, but you were his wife, and only his. 

Jaehyun made his way over to the two of you bowing, “May I steal a dance from the Princess?” He held his hand out towards you, Mark’s eyes drifted towards you before he nodded at the knight moving away and walking off. Jaehyun slid into his place, his hand resting on the small of your back pulling you into him, your bodies pressed together as he leaned down slightly to whisper to you, “You look beautiful tonight…” a smile played on your lips, your teeth biting the inside of your cheek to prevent you from saying something stupid. 

“Thank You,” you whispered back to him, your face nuzzling in the familiar spot near his chest, the spot you often laid on during late-night readings in the library that went on too long and he needed to carry you back to your room. “You clean up nicely” You smiled brightly, your hands resting on his shoulders as he swayed you, his smile lit up the room the way it lit him up. 

Your cheeks flushed as he leaned in, leaving a small peck on your cheek. “You seem, upset princess, can I do anything to help?” He questioned his lips close to your ear, as the music filled both of you, he spun you causing your dress to flow slightly before he pulled you into him, his eyes pouring into yours, he looked sad, a small part of him was sad, you’d be leaving him soon. You blinked slowly letting your emotions fall out, quiet sobs raked through your body as you leaned into him, he kept you close. A part of him knew why you were crying, he knew what Mark had done, had been doing. Jaehyun just never had the heart to tell you. “I’m so sorry… Princess” He whispered as you sobbed into his chest, “I’m sorry for what I'm about to do.” 

You looked up at him, cheeks flushed red, eyes burning from the tears that streamed down your face, “W-what?” You looked up at him confused, his hand cupping your cheek wiping away a few tears, you scrunch your nose in confusion, “What are you doing Jae..” Your hand wrapped around his wrist gently. 

“I can’t stand to see you hurting anymore.” He spoke, pressing a kiss to your forehead before he turned away from you walking towards Mark, leaving you alone in the middle of the dance floor. You watched him pull Mark from his seat next to Hana by the collar of his shirt. “You don’t deserve her. You never did.” Jaehyun spits his words toward Mark, “None of you deserve to be in the presence of such an amazing woman. You two sit here ogling at each other while she’s hurting.” One punch to Mark's jaw, you can’t make your feet move. You want to stop the fighting, you don’t want anyone to get hurt, but something keeps you still. 

“Don’t deserve her? Please we had to get married to appease our parents, there was no love for her ever.” Mark's eyes met yours, the pained expression on your face as tears streamed down your cheeks. He never loved you, he never loved you the way you loved him. You did what you do best and coward, you ran off to your safe place. 

Mark's words made Jaehyun glance towards you giving Mark a chance to swing, a good hit to his jawline sent Jaehyun into a blind rage. How dare he make you cry. Punch. How dare he watch the women he loves go through that much pain. Punch. Jaehyun finally gave in when the guards pulled him off the Prince. Both men were bloodied and bruised; he watched Mark wipe his lip carefully and examine the blood on his hand before he disappeared off towards Hana to tend to his wounds. “I’m fine..” Jaehyun muttered to the other guards before walking away to find you and apologize to you for his actions and ruining your wedding. 

Jaehyun knew where you’d be, you had one safe place in the entire castle. The library. He made his way there, pushing the door open, and he made his way to you. Your body was shaking with your sobs. “Princess…” he whispered, his voice hushed as he let himself fall to his knees as pulled your body to his. “I’m so sorry… for everything.” He spoke to you as you sniffled looking up at him. 

“Oh, Jaehyun..” You gasped quietly, your fingers pressing against the bruises that were forming on his beautiful face. “Why, why did you fight him for me… this could ruin everything.” You whispered to him as your hands cupped his cheeks, but he didn’t care that it might ruin everything, he had to try. He pressed his forehead against yours, his lips slightly away from yours. 

“I love you.” He whispered to you before closing the gap between your lips. Your lips moved with his as he wrapped his arms around your waist pulling you into his lap, you were the one who deepened the kiss, fingers loosely tangling into his messy hair, you could taste the blood through the kiss but that didn’t matter, all that mattered at this moment was that your favorite knight loved you. He loved you the way nobody else could. His hands traveled down your waist slowly, his fingertips brushing against your thighs softly as you pulled yourself closer to you. 

“Please Jae..” you whispered into his lips, as you tugged his hair slightly, his lips making their way down your jawline, as his fingers pushed your dress slightly, he wanted to feel your skin, he craved the feeling of your soft thighs against his rough fingertips. “Want you to touch me..” you mumbled out as he kissed his way down your shoulders. His hands slipped up slightly, he glanced at you, almost as if he was asking for permission but you were in the moment, you felt his hand press against your soaked core. Your eyes met his as you nodded slowly, his fingers pulling the fabric aside to feel you. 

He almost moaned at the feeling of your wetness on his fingers, he circled his fingers around your clit causing you to let out a moan burying your face into his neck, slightly embarrassed because nobody had ever touched you like this, and because the soft touches he gave you sent sparks through your body. “I want to take care of you..” he whispered, sinking his fingers into your soaked core, curling them as you moaned into his shoulder. You needed more of him. Your body arched into his every chance it had as you let out soft moans as his fingers curled in you. Your core clenched around his fingers as he kissed down your shoulder, his lips exploring your chest peppering your skin in kisses as he worked his fingers into you, your moans filling his ears, filling the desire he had to please you. 

Your fingers tangled into his hair softly tugging, your lips begging to meet his as you lean into him pressing your lips to his, his mouth moving with yours as you begged him to make you cum. “Please, right there Jaehyun..” His name slipped off your tongue as your head fell back against the bookshelf, your orgasm ripping through you as you came on his fingers, your face immediately red with embarrassment. Not only had you cheated on your new husband with your knight but you’d never been intimate with anyone before. 

Jaehyun slipped his hand out from under your dress, kissing over your blushed cheeks as you leaned into his chest. “Are you okay?” he whispered his hand rubbing your side as you laid their bodies pressed together. He didn’t want to press the situation seeing as it was nearly impossible for you to feel how hard he was through the armor he was wearing, he could sense how tense you became after what he’d hoped was a good time. 

You nodded looking up at him. “Jae… what are we going to do..” You whispered to him, your fingers coming up to cup his cheek. He leaned into your touch and let out a soft sigh, his body relaxing into yours. You never thought your silly crush on Jaehyun was real, you were always betrothed to Mark, that’s what you’d been told your whole life ‘don’t fall in love, you’re already married off’ because of this you never let your feelings for Jaehyun cloud your judgment, but here you were, a mess in his arms and he loved you still. 

“Let me take you to your room y/n, you need your rest.” His voice was gentle in your ears as he lifted your body with ease, your head drooping to his neck as you cuddled into him. You’d only heard him use your name a few times but it sounded like honey from his lips.

“Will you stay the night?” you whispered to him before letting your eyes close heavy in your head as you fell asleep to the beating of his heart, too far gone to hear his response 

___

The following morning you shot up in bed too fast causing your head to spin. You stood up slowly looking at yourself, you were still in your dress from last night. That's when the memories flooded into your brain, the fight, the blood, the kissing. You shook your head as you sat on your bed rubbing your temples. Emotions were high, there was no way Jaehyun saw you that way. Where was Mark during all of this? You let out a groan as you stood up stripping yourself of the dress. It was then you noticed the remnants of last night, pink and purple bruises covering your chest, you smiled to yourself. Somehow you were more sure than ever of what you wanted, and what you wanted was him. 

After showering and dressing you opened your bedroom door and peeked down the hall. You watched Mark fumble out of Hana’s room looking over at you half-heartedly. “What? Your boyfriend beat me up.” He looked at you almost as if he was disgusted. 

“You don’t get to speak to me that way. I am your wife, not some plaything you can bully around because you got punched. I loved you!” Loved. You didn’t feel anything for Mark all you could feel was hatred for him, for the idea of him, for even marrying him. 

“Loved me? I knew you loved me, but I never loved you, I could never love you.” Mark spoke towards you causing you to back up slowly, your body tensed up at how close he was getting to you. “How could I ever love someone like you y/n, you’ve never truly loved me. You run off with Jaehyun whenever you have the chance.” He spat his words at you, you felt your eyes well up because he wasn’t wrong, but you’d always shoved your feelings for him away, at least until last night. “You can’t even deny it, face it. We love other people.” You let a few tears fall from your eyes. 

“I think you should step away from the Princess.” You looked in the direction of Jaehyun’s voice, he stood at the end of the hallway hearing everything that was being said. Mark scoffed, looking at you, his eyes locking with yours as he leaned in gently pressing his lips against yours. You pushed him away, refusing his kiss. 

“Stop it, Mark. You don’t get to act like an ass and then try and kiss me.” Your eyes focused on the girl standing in the doorway, “and you. How dare you!” your arms crossed over your chest as you moved towards her, Mark’s arm quickly to protect the girl, causing your eyes to flash between them. “Get out.” you spoke firmly looking into his eyes, tears filling your own before you look back at Jaehyun, “Get them out of here! Now!” you called towards him before pulling yourself back into your room slamming the door shut, before throwing yourself onto the bed letting the tears fall. 

___

A knock on the door causes you to sit up. You sniffed slightly before brushing yourself off gently, you made your way to the door sighing softly, “Who is it?” your voice was shaky from all the crying you had been doing, and your nose was stuffed. 

“It’s me y/n…” his voice was soft and sincere as he looked at your face when you opened the door for him. His arms immediately engulfed you in a hug. He must have fought with Mark again, his helmet was still on, the plates of his armor cool against your skin. He smelt like outside. You pulled yourself away from him slowly, your eyes searching his. 

“Jaehyun…” you whispered as he pulled off the helmet shaking his hair out, the front pieces were matted from the sweat. You gulped softly, your eyes trailing down his body as you moved towards him again. You were at a loss for words. Your best friend, your best Knight, the person who’d always been there for you was the person you somehow found yourself in love with him. Your fingers unclipped the armor with ease as he watched you with a raised eyebrow. “I want you,” you whispered before wrapping your arms around his neck, colliding your lips with his. 

His hands immediately wrapped around your back. His fingers worked to untie your dress as your hands pulled at the all too much clothing he was wearing. Your fingers tangle into his hair as you deepen the kiss, pressing against him as he successfully slid his hands to your sides after loosening the dress that covered you. “You’re beautiful,” he whispered to your lips gently before picking you up, your legs wrapping around his waist as he kissed you again. 

His body moved, walking you towards your bed as he laid you down. His hand worked your dress down your body, his fingers pressing into your skin gently as he hovered over you slightly, his hair falling into his face. “You’re entirely too clothed.” You pouted up at him gently watching him pull the shirt he wore over his head, revealing his toned stomach to you. The butterflies bubbled up in your tummy as you slid your hands down his torso, his skin was warm under your hands. He kissed down your neck slowly, you let out soft groans as you pressed yourself into him slightly.

“Let me take care of you, baby…” he whispered into your ear as he kissed down your neck towards your breasts. His eyes always darting to yours for confirmation, your nods enticing him to move his kisses lower. His hands ran over your legs gently as he kissed your lower stomach, his fingers looping into the hem of your panties. “You’re so beautiful.” He whispered against the skin of your thighs. 

“Jaehyun, please. I need you.” You whined looking down at him slightly, your breath hitching in your throat as your eyes met. A smirk formed on his face as he pressed his tongue flat against your core, a moan fell from your lips as you let your hair fall back against the pillows as he devoured you. His fingers pressed against your hole gently before sinking them into you as his tongue continued the assault on your clit. Your fingers tangled into his hair as you chased your high, his fingers curling slightly into you. “Fuck fuck J-jaehyun!” you moaned out letting your orgasm take over. He pulled himself away from you a small chuckle rumbling from his chest as he kissed back up your torso making his way to your lips, he hovered over you. 

Your hands ran down his torso gently as you attempted to steady your breathing, your eyes locking with his. His dark brown eyes were soft and full of love as they poured into yours. He leaned in pressing his lips to yours as his hands continued to hold him up. “I don’t want to hold back anymore.” He mumbled against your lips softly as you wrapped your legs around his waist gently, you felt him against your core, a whimper falling against his lips.

“Jae please just fuck me already” You spoke to him words like this had never escaped your lips despite the nights you spent thinking of this moment with him, his eyes locked with yours as he pressed his tip against your aching core, his head dipping into the crook of your neck pressing a soft kiss as he slid himself into you. You let out a gasp, followed by a whimper. 

Jaehyun’s eyes frantically searched yours. “Fuck I’m sorry!” he spoke fast, moving back slightly causing you to let out a whine, you couldn’t take it anymore, he was being too nice to you, you weren’t going to break. 

“Please… I need it,” you spoke reaching your arm down between your bodies and guiding him back to your core. “I want you to fill me… please Jaehyun.” he let out a groan before slipping himself back into your soaked core.

His face pressed into your neck as he rocked his hips slowly loosening you up. “Fuck you’re so beautiful,” he mumbled softly as he thrusted slowly, followed by a string of compliments. 

“More…” you begged. “Want all of it…” your mind was going numb as he thrusted into you. “Harder please..” you looked up at him, you looked so pretty for him, how could he deny you. He pulled you into him thrusting his length into you smirking at the moans you let out, your arms reached out pulling him to you, meeting his lips once again. His thrusts were steady as he whispered sweet nothings into your ear. Your moans fill the room. Your nails digging into his shoulders, clawing down his back you felt the knot in your belly tighten. “G-gonna cum” 

“Me too princess… fuck you’re so pretty under me baby…” he looked towards you and held you close to him, grunting at the way your nails scraped at his skin as you came around his cock, he came soon after filling you just like you asked.

He let his body weight fall half on you before your hands ran through his hair softly. “It's okay Jaehyun…” you whispered gently feeling the rest of his weight against you, his lips pressed against your neck as you played with his hair, enjoying the moment for a while. You closed your eyes your breath steadying. 

His hands softly rubbed at your sides before he spoke up, “Are you alright?” he sat up slowly pulling the cover over himself slightly as he admired your frame, you nodded softly pulling your body and the cover along with you. You smiled slightly your fingers tracing the marks you’d left on his biceps. 

“I’m sorry about that…” you blushed, your ears turning red as you pulled your legs into your body gently looking up at him. You had nothing but love for your favorite Knight. “Jaehyun… will you take me away from here, somewhere that we can be together with no judgment?” your eyes met his with nothing but love and adoration before he nodded softly and laid down pulling you into him. 

“Tomorrow Princess, I will take you anywhere you want to go.”

tags: @infnteen @peachjaem00 @ncteez @neochan

[neocoffeecafe]

hi omg tysm love for tagging me!! this sounds so so so much fun! ✨thank u for the tag, @markmyheartz !!

01. somebody else - the 1975

02. byob - billie

03. fly away with me - nct 127

04. you didn’t know - from the hazbin hotel ost

05. chill kill - red velvet

06. fiction - beast

07. escapism - raye + 070 shake

08. ms jackson - outkast

09. love you too late - cole swindell

10. picture - hyo

tag list: @sherwees @ne0pearl @ncityprincess @mrkis @writerpetals @neochan @tqmies @daydreamingyuta @phoxphenex @hugs2doie

! "10 on repeat shuffles" tag game !

rules: shuffle your on repeat playlist and post the first 10 tracks, then tag 10 people

tagged by: no one but started by @galaxycunt when i saw the post on my dashboard. thank u hellsite algorithm~

will include a little excerpt of explanation on why it could be in my on-repeat playlist + not include an artist repeat

obstacles - syd matters (last song from the sub homesick alien playlist + notable time wave vibe songs cause it is also in the life is strange game)

tinnitus - txt (part of my audiophiles' eargasm playlist where i wanna hear a godly-produced song with my best headphones)

duvet - boa (i think it has been in my on repeat since 2021 when i watched serial experiments lain and has never left. a notable song for terra incognita)

this is why - paramore (just heard the whole album last month and every time i listen to this song, i'm in a state of catharsis cause I CAN RELATE)

tom sawyer - rush (having been particularly obsessed with the iron claw movie, this song is stuck in my head and i swear i love prog rock even more + i'll be learning the bass line of this song hopefully)

euphor - novo amor, lowswimmer (heard this for the novo amor concert i went to last week (even though they didn't perform it). part of the beomgyu time wave's spinoff playlist)

solsbury hill - peter gabriel (another addition to my audiophiles' eargasm playlist cause it sounds so odd that it's so interesting)

weird fishes/arpeggi - radiohead (the song that embodies me as a person + have been putting it on repeat during my bday because it's the day that i just embraced my self of being a pisces which includes hearing this playing in the car and a solo date to the aquarium)

follow you follow me - genesis (the song that reminds me of soobin idk why. it's also in my sub homesick alien playlist)

do hot girls like chords? - knower (heard this from micthesnare and it's my introduction to indietronica and jazz-funk (cause i've already know acid jazz from jamiroquai)

tagging: (based on the last 10 moots that show up on my dash) @boba-beom @stardragongalaxy @lovejoshua @txt-yaomi @euphor1a @junniieesbby @itz-yerin @pyeonghongrie @dido-of-the-endless @robin-obsessed and anyone who wants to join! (new songs to listen to yes pls)

[mrkis]

imagine haechan whining when ur overstimming him

-Lilith

lilith.. you're back (ʃƪ ˘ ³˘)

ok ngl this whole ask just brought back memories from when i was talking to neochan abt overstimulating hyuck and now i'm shaking.

donghyuck would be so loud and whiny when he's being overstimulated by you. his body would be glistening with sweat, his bangs stuck to his forehead with his back arching at every touch. tears would pour down his cheeks, drool seeping from the corners of his mouth and he mumbles about how he feels like he's going to go crazy.

he'd definitely want you to kiss him through it too. he'll feel like he's in heaven if you suck on his tongue and nibble on his lips

[angelwonie]

2022 is already over but i still want to make this post because i love you guys and you made this year more bearable, so...

dear followers...

you guys are what keeps me going. thank you so much for supporting me, liking my writing, and filling out every stupid form i post on impulse. thank you for always being patient and discussing your thoughts with me. thank you for choosing to stick with me of all people. i am so grateful for all of you and my time on tumblr!! tumblr is like an escape from reality for me and you guys make it so much fun <3

dear mutuals...

@cosmic-railwayxo - you fucking loser i think youre the best thing that happened to me all year (except guesung's abs). thank you so much for being my friend, for talking to me literally everyday, for giving me something to look forward to when im at uni and want to die. i love facetiming u, i love sending u reels, i love how we r literally bffs even if there are thousands of km between us. that much doesnt matter when we gossip or talk abt kpop men fs BAHAHAHA. anyways i could probably write an essay abt u and how much i love your colossal cock, but this is getting long so all im gna say is i love you.

@hwangyeonjun - rels my bae ur 97' liner smau is what gives me oxygen to breathe (on that note,, I NEED AN UPDATE). thank u for being my mutual and slaying with me even tho im a little insane. i love you!!

@hwajin - kATHY GIRL u were the one that had to listen to me scream about arisu and u literally wrote me a fic for him???? we r besties for life atp. we should write each other fics sometime again bcs that was sm fun. ure so hot and nice and ur hyunjin series slays. thank you for being my friend and always giving me the same energy back!! kisses for u

@hoshologies - moon omg we've known each other so long but it feels so short??? i hope ure slaying all ur days away bcs ure fucking amazing and u deserve it. once every month when it's a full moon i lay down on the grass and think abt how much i miss ur writing and u actually. hope we keep in touch in 2023, i love you bestieee

@jjkeverlast - lati thank u sm for being my friend!! i love talking to u about everything and nothing (read: the dilf from aib) and ure so kind honestly (when ure not stealing kento yamazaki from me BOOOO). i hope we interact a lot in 2023 and i wish you all good things this year!! you deserve it.

@jayzdaze - kay u queen. ur fics never dissappoint and ure so??? mature and cool i think of u as my older sister fr. im so happy to be ur moot and friend and i hope we remain close in 2023 as well. love you bae!

@jenoslutie - nabi i swear i followed u bcs ur name is the same as that girl from nevertheless HAJASJKAJKA but i fell in love with you and your sexy brain too. ur fics always deliver and i miss our convos sm :/ we should start talking more again!! either way im so happy to have you as a mutual and ily.

@kookiecrumb - ISA MY FIRST MUTUAL OMG!!! there's so much i want to say to you but i dont even know if i can put it into words. youre so amazing, talented and intelligent. i think you might be the most intellectual person i have ever met. i am never bored when we talk to each other, and i always leave our conversations in a happy mood. i love your passion for bts and i love your big sexy brain. i hope we stay friends forever.

@mingirn - mars idk abt u but im ur number one fan forever. like idc if we dont talk for a month, the moment i see mingirn on dash or in my ask i SQUEAL. i love you so so much and ure so funny and delusional (omg ure just like me) and im so happy we r moots. i would literally fight w armys for u. thats true love i'm telling u.

@neochan - sam ure like that mutual everyone is afraid of bcs theyre just so. cool. i love you so much and i love talking abt nct with u bcs ure the only one that gets my obsession with their cocks. thank you for being my mutual (and friend, i hope) and for blessing me with your fics!!

@planetdream - dreamie i swear to god you were the second blog i followed on here (i unfollowed the first so ure technically the first tho hihi) and i literally have flashbacks whenever i reread ur fics kskasksska. we've never talked like super much, but whenever we do i feel happy, and im glad that feeling hasnt faded throughout all those months. u will always hold a special place in my heart and im so glad to be ur friend!!

@shmooooo - isa u were literally my savior when i was in my cha eunwoo phase. like there is no one on tumblr that simps for that guy and im like??? hello wake up. thank you so much for talking to me about him and my fics, i appreciate you bae!!

@wuahae - cat i love you so so much!! ur writing is so alluring and beautiful, and your personality is too. i always have sm fun talking to u and whenever i see you on dash, i smile. we need to talk more bcs i NEED to hear your thoughts on every picture mingyu and hoshi post on instagram.