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#from what i have seen jinx didnt deserve this shit
burning-sol · 3 months
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Because I'm a loser I'm going over this piece of controversy because if it catches on here I will lose my mind. This controversy surrounds @ jinxontherocks and Charlie Slimecicle. All the following screenshots were taken the same day as typing, and I made this post with what may be incomplete information. DO NOT HARASS ANYONE INVOLVED!! Regardless of who you're contacting, regardless of your intentions, DON'T contact anyone shown here.. ANYONE!!
Jinx's Instagram lists their pronouns as she/they/he, please don't misgender her: https://www.instagram.com/jinxultraviolet
CW this shit is about RPF and MCYT NSFW (pornographic content of Minecraft Youtubers' characters and they themselves), there are screenshots showing censored posts of it and there is a brief mention of rape amongst them.
The tweet that started off my little investigation and is causing outrage..
https://twitter.com/shubluvr/status/1799909241404129604
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Something I noticed as I was adding alt txt.. I don't know anything about Jinx or how she assigns "Close Friends" on his Instagram, but basically users can assign someone as a "Close Friend" and you can then post stories only ppl within that group can see. If Jinx is the kind of person who hands out this status to anyone they know, this isn't a big deal, but if this person was close to Jinx I want you to keep in mind the possibility that this is potentially a violation of Jinx's boundaries. If this person knew Jinx closely, they could have talked to her in private, but instead they chose to make this a public affair. At best this could have been something the anonymous person genuinely thought was the moral thing to do, or this person could at worst be straight up an emotionally abusive person who shared these photos as a way to egg on Jinx's "downfall" or something similar. Again, this is only POTENTIALLY, but you need to be critical of who is sourcing your information and what their intentions are.
So the screenshots do prove Jinx knows Charlie and has been interacting with him and maybe (MAYBE) even dating him.. Which!! I just wanna clarify before you ask, I searched this up, Charlie and Grace broke up. Jinx and Charlie are both in their early to mid twenties. Aside from this controversy, there is really nothing to say abt them that isn't just, "mind your own business".
https://twitter.com/insidetheslime/status/1770617006364262832
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So why is this an issue? What's with the controversy? Let's check out that first quote tweet.
https://twitter.com/shubluvr/status/1793371199449547014
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The claim is that Jinx, possibly, willingly engaged with someone who posted MCYT porn. Which the user states, "it wasn't my intention to present the examples of what that person posted as if u liked them" but then proceeds to reiterate again that "u have to go out of ur way to find an acc like that." so which is it? That's a rhetorical question, we know which it is because if it was the former people wouldn't be so mad. But at least we know where these initial claims came from so let me scroll back and see what this user had initially posted as proof.
Here's the thread.
https://twitter.com/shubluvr/status/1790861709218828459
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The archive page linked: https://archive.md/g8xOX
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So yes, this does prove Jinx followed an account that posted NSFW of Charlie (RPF) and Charlie's characters (MCYT). However, just following someone isn't necessarily proof you've seen the full extent of their content. So let's finally circle back around to Jinx's tweet in response to this (something that was quote tweeted earlier) and discuss why I have such an issue with this entire controversy. Time to crack open the point of this entire post.
https://twitter.com/jinxontherocks/status/1793353847437701538
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Hi everyone, apologises for taking a few days to address this as I've been logged off of twitter for my own mental health and due to the constant harassment and death threats that I have been receiving. Recently, there was a thread posted on me showing how I was following someone who created NSFW art of some content creators, specifically Charlie who I'm friends with. I absolutely condemn this kind of boundary-breaking NSFW art of content creators, and would never willingly follow or interact with an account that I knew created art like this. I am only semi-active on Twitter, especially on my 18+ account, and I was shocked and upset to discover I was following an account like this at the same time everyone else did. Because this account is now deactivated, I'm not sure what I originally followed them for, but it was likely COD or puppy girl art. I've privated my NSFW account as well because I'm not comfortable with a bunch of people who are likely minors in the community scrolling through it. Because people are making some gross assumptions as well I want to clarify that I met Charlie IRL, and had no idea who he or his friends were at all or as content creators before meeting them. We met naturally, became friends, and still are. Throughout this past week I've received an insane amount of harassment and threats, and have seen tons of misinformation spread about me and the whole situation so I definitely felt a need to clarify everything. I knew essentially nothing at all abt this acc or any of their callouts or whatnot, that just wasn't the sphere of cc I was in at any point, and while I post semi frequently on here, I'm not very interactive with content beyond my mutuals. Likely gonna retcon that going forward and look more into who I'm following before I do. Also pointing out that a lot of the sc's included in this thread or others are being presented as or shown as if they were from my likes? They were not, straight up not. Just gonna clear that up now. Lastly, please do not harass the creator of the thread or anyone else involved in this situation please. Please be kind y'all, and good day!
Quick note, if behind the scenes Jinx had immediately gotten harassment and death threats after the conception of that thread, THAT'S why Jinx was suddenly "stalking" leaktwt. Like of course Jinx is going to find the source of a bunch of people who are telling her he sucks and (possibly) telling him to kill themselves. Someone becoming conscious of their own controversy very quickly after it's conception isn't an abnormal thing.
So basically, I felt like I was going bananas because I'm going through replies trying to see if there's more evidence but there's nothing really condemning Jinx that strongly. You have evidence they followed someone who posts RPF NSFW, SHE confirmed she'd followed the acc that posted RPF NSFW.. But do they condone it? Did he see it? WHERE is your evidence?? WHY are you all so convinced she condones RPF NSFW? Well I stumbled across this brilliant series of screenshots someone added that's making me lose my marbles.
https://twitter.com/4ngelcicle/status/1793729694577332396
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artist: im genuinely baffled if anyone believes rhis like i cannot emphasize how much i only posted on that acc to post porn 😭 other user: she only followed you this april right? like after she meet charlie? artist: yess like only a few days to a week before the thread was made? im so confused how she couldve found me in the first place let alone follow me because ,, i only post abt charie my bio is nsfwrpf and my pfp was bsd and banner was fnaf? nothing to warrant her following me?
artist: uhmmm she followed me few days to a week before the first thread was made? i dont remember but i got the notification when she followed me on her very public acc? i didnt realize it was jinx tho so i just let her follow me? when i stalked her acc she just seemed like a normal nsfw acc without any nsfwrpf even in her likes. thats it in regards to interacting with me but its also strange how she even found me in the first place? my account is sightly inactive so it wasnt like i was tweeting something funny or even spamming the tl to regard being followed? anytime i posted on the public acc it was about porn because thats what the account is for 😭 so idek how she found my acc in the firstplace cuz i also censor everything?? but thats all i know xP artist: u already know most of it but yk
artist: omg ugh artist: literally the only things i posted on that acc ever was cc nsfw artist: if it was unrelated i would post it on my priv
My jaw DROPPED when I saw this. I wanna hone in on this one tidbit that you may have glossed over, "when i stalked her acc she just seemed like a normal nsfw acc without any nsfwrpf even in her likes. thats it in regards to interacting with me".. So that's it. THAT'S IT. Even the artist in question only has proof he followed them, not that there was any tangible interactions to prove she saw the RPF content. And also, "my bio is nsfwrpf and my pfp was bsd and banner was fnaf? nothing to warrant her following me?" So it is 100% possible that he had only seen the artist's pfp, banner, the words "RPF" but not the problematic content in question.. And here's a relevant reply from Jinx on the fact the artist had RPF in their bio-
https://twitter.com/jinxontherocks/status/1793370260885918108
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So we actually need to talk about how exactly social media works, because for some reason nobody is bringing this up despite USING Twitter and KNOWING what Twitter feeds look like.
If you have ever been on a Twitter For You page (I'm checking mine now) you will know that the feed isn't strictly curated based on your following, Twitter has an algorithm that'll put posts on your feed based on different factors. When I go to mine, my feed isn't strictly people I follow (in fact it's barely people I follow), it's not chronological, and I don't know if this is still a feature but I distinctly remember times where I got shown posts that were LIKED by someone or RETWEETED by someone- So again, your feed can show you a lot of varying things that you're either only somewhat adjacent to or something that's not anything you're remotely interested in. So basically, you cannot know exactly what someone's feed looks like unless a person hand you their phone and you scroll through it. You can make ESTIMATES of what you thing someone's feed will look like, but, again, you can only know exactly what someone's feed looks like if you're able to scroll through it.
This is to say that it's 100% possible at some point Jinx came across a post from the account on their feed, didn't see it anything RPF related in the post or on their immediate page (assuming they clicked on the profile because you can follow people without going to their profile), and followed them. And even if they posted RPF the rest of the time, there is no way to know what % of Jinx's feed it would have been present on.. Which! Btw, is also influenced by if Jinx even frequents the For You page at ALL.. Which, Jinx claims he's not super active on Twitter, so that lines up perfectly with her explanation.
(And before you say something about it, we don't have access to the NSFW account because it got deactivated, but I personally doubt that the user literally only posted NSFW of RPF and MCYT. Most NSFW accs I've seen in my time always have even the slightest amount of variety.. So it's not to say it's not possible, but I think the artists' words are likely an exaggeration. That's the assumption this point is functioning under.)
Plus, remember what I mentioned about people liking or retweeting posts? It's kind of a whole point of social media that posts spread in chains, and it's 100% possible for posts from obscure or problematic people to reach normal people in the right circumstances. Again, this is just.. This is just how Twitter works?? How social media works?? And I feel like I'm insane sitting here typing out how posts actually end up on your feeds and reminding people what an algorithm is and that some people just AREN'T as online as you.
And I'm not saying all this to say that I am 100% sure that Jinx is innocent because I don't KNOW, and that's the POINT. You can't KNOW what Jinx has seen and what she hasn't unless you have proof of him interacting DIRECTLY with something.. And follows don't count because I know PLENTY of people (including myself at times) who don't vet the people they follow, and follow people from a post they've seen on their feed instead of their profile. The artist THEMSELF said, as I will highlight again, "when i stalked her acc she just seemed like a normal nsfw acc without any nsfwrpf even in her likes. thats it in regards to interacting with me"..
All the evidence I've seen as of typing this is heresay, and unless all these people can present some substantial evidence that actually SAYS what they WANT it to say, I'm going to believe that Jinx made an honest mistake.
There's probably some other arguments I could make to prove my point, but I've been so thorough with everything I've been typing for literal hours just covering this. So I just wanna get at something that REALLY pisses me off about Twitter and I don't want to fucking see.
STOP calling people complicit in someone else's behaviour just because they're close to them. You are very potentially blaming VICTIMS THEMSELVES and I'm so fucking done with this.
Some people are saying Charlie is condoning this behaviour and it is DISGUSTING because can you actually take a step back and think about what you're saying?? Maybe Charlie does know, maybe he's into some freak shit, IDK, but I think it's WAY more likely Charlie didn't. The chances are far more likely that, if the allegations here are true, Charlie's boundaries were VIOLATED and HE'S the victim here. Though we can't really know because (I can't stress it enough) we don't KNOW what's happened behind the scenes. Charlie liked the tweet jinx made..
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Which could mean several things. Maybe! The allegations aren't true, and Charlie is showing support for her. Maybe! The allegations were true, but they've quietly resolved the situation behind the scenes. Maybe! The allegations were true, and Jinx LIED to Charlie so he believes her.
(And yeah, I am implying these allegations could be true and I STILL think Jinx should be given some leniency based on if they've changed their mind on the morality of that content and have apologised in private to Charlie.. Because life is weird and people are weird and people change. Like IDK, again, maybe Charlie into that freak shit. What are you gonna do if a guy likes NSFW being drawn of himself? Complain to HIM about what his boundaries should be?)
You don't KNOW, you CAN'T know. I will state this over and OVER, YOU DON'T KNOW. Don't harass Jinx over things you don't know are true. If you don't like him after hearing these allegations? You're allowed to! It's fine! Block them and move on. But DON'T pretend that's the same as having evidence, because from what I've seen, you don't.
And I got very heated in that last bit so I just wanna say, I've spent all my time (again, these past few hours) writing this post. I don't know if Tumblr knows about this or is already talking about this, but this is my thorough take on the situation. I just hope it clears up some things because I would really fucking hate if it caught on and everyone starts spread (potential) misinformation and ruining someone's life for literally no reason.
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bigskydreaming · 6 years
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In the best (personal) news I have had in oh, over a year, FINALLY got the results of the MRI back and it is NOT a tumor lurking in my nonexistent jaw joint area and causing all my Issues, as my doctor was worried about from the latest CT scans. Which, like. Yeah. I don’t really have the words for how grateful I am to hear that because like, hahahaha I was getting super tired of my rock bottoms introducing themselves to new rock bottoms, you know???
So I am currently buzzing and high on that news, life in general, and y’know, sleep deprivation, cuz ngl, it was definitely not fun hearing I should know by Monday whether or not like, I have cancer, only for that to be dragged out until freaking Friday. Hahaha what is sleep, I have had like, five hours all week maybe? Needless to say I am super behind again on work, rent, insurance and all that fun stuff BUT as long as I can say “but I don’t have cancer!” at the end of each of those things, like....yeah I’m gonna milk the fuck out of that qualifier for energy, as long as I possibly can lololol.
Did talk to my insurance ppl today though and I’ve got at least until Tuesday to pay my premiums, so got a couple more days of breathing room there. Can’t get it extended past that though because my doctor’s already gonna be calling in preauthorization requests for like, the actual surgery and stuff as early as Monday and I reeeeeally don’t want ‘okay but this dude hasn’t even paid up yet’ being a factor at all in whether or not they approve my 25K surgery.
Fingers crossed that my good luck continues to hold, as there’s a possibility this might all get dealt with once and for all, a lot sooner than I’d hoped for?? Like, cuz of the MRI she was able to get a clear view of exactly what the problem is, the inflammation around the joint and actual erosion of the bone, etc, which cut out a lot of the other steps we were preparing to take to isolate the exact issue before moving forward. It also apparently lit a hell of a fire under their asses cuz they were able to see not just that the joint is totally wrecked (which we’ve known for like, nine months now, wasn’t news), but just how badly eroded my jawbone is at like....the other point of the jaw that holds it at least somewhat connected to my skull still even though the joint itself is nonexistent? Idk not explaining that right because again, sleep deprived like whoa. 
ANYWAY. Point is my doctor was like, so basically because of the constant damage being done in that area every time you open your mouth at all, you’re fracturing it further and its only hanging on by the barest sliver at this point - which, DUH, is exactly what I’ve been telling all these doctors it felt like, for over a year BUT I DIGRESS - so she’s all, yeah, we need to move this along as fast as possible because if you erode that area much more like, she doesn’t even know what that’ll look like in practice cuz she’s never actually had to deal with a case that bad, but reading between the lines it sounds like I would just not be able to close my mouth shut at all after that point, which....lol bye bye basic eating and talking? Idk. So its super fun being the worst case of this particular issue she’s ever seen personally haha yay me (but at least I don’t have cancer!)
So. Still putting it in the win column.
But yeah, so she found another surgeon that does potentially take insurance for the actual surgery costs, if we can get my insurance to approve it, and in the meanwhile now I gotta set up appointments at this OTHER imaging place for another more specific CT scan to measure how big the prosthetic will need to be, and they don’t take insurance there at all so that’s gonna be $600 no matter what. BUT, this new surgeon has a bunch of premade prosthetics they keep on site and so there’s a possibility they might be able to fit me with a premade prosthetic that’s already the right dimension instead of having to order a custom made one. And if I can get the surgery approved by my insurance and they find a premade that works, the surgery can be set up in as little as three weeks (which omg holy shit is that a light at the end of the tunnel, IT JUST FUCKING MIGHT BE crap I totally jinxed it didnt I fuck). If they can’t find a premade that works though it’ll still be the 4-6 months to make a custom one so, boooooo, we’re really hoping that doesn’t happen, cuz, again. I do not know precisely what several months of not being able to swing my jaw shut at all even lopsidedly and thus no eating or talking....like lmao what would that even look like how do you not like, starve in that case? Idk. So....super duper hoping that we can find a premade and get the surgery scheduled quicklikearabbit and not have to wait several more months and risk just eroding whatever it is that’s still up there in that general vicinity that’s left to erode, idk, like I said what are words right now even.
YEAH. SO. That’s my status update for those who’ve been messaging and checking in and whatnot, like, y’all are rockstars and I fucking adore you and am so grateful. I am now going to go sleep the sleep of the dead because hahahahahaha ow light is actually physically painful at the moment, I just came to sit up straight at my desk and I’m honestly feeling so attacked right now.
Then its back to work for me but also I might have some fic updates??? lol. Cuz of people who’ve donated and made non-imposing requests or suggestions for things I could write and thus mitigate my OMG I Do Not Deserve Your Generosity ulcers of doom. That I’ve been writing off and on but mostly just off this last week in particular where I unfortunately did a lot of like, staring at the wall watching paint dry except not really cuz they weren’t freshly painted or whatever, look you get what I mean probably. 
Right. So. Assuming any of this makes sense to anyone and I’m not actually just stringing together nonsense series of words here at this point, still likely to be scarce for a few days to a week. Gonna leave my paypal link again, cuz I mean, yeah. I’m way more sick of posting it than anyone could possibly be of seeing my post it lolol, trust me, but hopefully there is a point now in the near(ish) future where I will once again be able to work productively and non-chronic-painfully again and thus not be in desperate need of the kindness of strangers 24/7. That would be so awesome omgwtfbbqicanteven. You don’t even know. 
But also! At least I don’t have cancer. So. I actually have a bizarre amount of energy at the moment despite being two seconds away from faceplanting into my keyboard from exhaustion. Look I dont even get how that works either. I’m nuanced okay.
I feel like there was something to write here like in conclusion or in summation or tl;dr but also fuck it, I think I literally just heard my last remaining synapse fire in my brain I gtg ttyl byyyyyyyyyyyye.
https://paypal.me/bigskydreaming?locale.x=en_US
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hiraethstill · 5 years
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THIS WEEK AND LAST WEEK ON DAIYA NO ACE (7/16 and 7/23)
SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT!
7/16 LIVEBLOG:
IMMEDIATE assault by eijun's handsome face
and his DETERMINATION
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every time the OP comes on im like where are the babies? THERE THEY ARE @ firsties
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the way i GASPED
THIS IS HOW WE FELL IN LOVE WITH EIJUN I TELL YOU
haha poor audience member doesnt know sawamura is mostly good at swinging from the bunt stance
eijun... you have every right to be frustrated
ugh... the way he looks when he was a doormat to the ace... i feel this too much my chest hurts
"if i had pitched like furuya did today i wouldve been subbed out" TOO TRUE AND OUCH
HE HITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT
THE BOIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
THE MAN THE MYTH THE LEGENDDD
AND JUST LOOK AT ASADA AND KUKI'S F A C E S
DOUBLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
lmao did eijun learn to run bases from mochi? now i want this
uhhh the announcer was wrong? the STANDS were all cheering and happy, it was mostly the dugout that was surprised
bc this is level of trust he gets from first string sigh
sorry all my frustration is here
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HAHA OKAY BUT why does this look gayalso sawamura's little "na!" with the pew pew is so cute wtf
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his lil cheeky face in the corner im hashjdlkdgj
haruichi and toujou in that shot look like they'd been helping him practice batting and it paid off 
hslkhg eijun and his "hips!" i cant
KANEMARUUUUUUUUU
HELL YEAH TAKUMI NICE SHOULDER
nice eijun is safe
haha i never know who to root for bc i love all the bois
okay but
has anyone ever talked about how cool amahisa's eyes are???
i mean
look at this
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so cool
yoooo wtf amahisa's voice in this part is really appealing??? damnn
so... kanemaru's a capable batter even if he's not top tier, why you gotta keep making him bunt
oh well, i like that face you're making kanemaru
noooooooooooo
it's okay kanemaru you did your best
cmon mochi bring him home!!!!!!!!!!
EIJUN ENOUGH WITH THE HIPS LMAO
yeah thats right mochi + other batters, give him the run support he deserves
AMAHISA THE DISASTER BI IM
"did he shave his eyebrows? he looks like a strong fighter" are you just checking him out
you'd want him to do those jump kicks amahisa
moon-face?????
omg i feel the tinglings... of a rarepair... amakura.....................
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what was i saying about his EYES??
come the fuck ON dont leave eijun stranded on second!!!!!!
H
HHHHH
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
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MY BOISSSSSSSSSSS
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SHOW ME YOUR FACEEE
(and u rite yall amahisa is yabai)
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THERE BE YOUR FACEEEE
IM SO EMOTIONAL
AND HIS VOICE
FUCKLE
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AND HIMSTDVEEE
whoaaa that slowmo pitching sequence!
HARUCCHIII
oh hello eijun upping the tempo and looking great doing it
wow this super HD sparkle miyuki
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EIJUN IS BEAUTIFULLLL and lowkey this looks like the OP
ASADA AND KUKI MY SONS I WOULD DIE FOR YOUUUUUUUUUUUU
BEING SO EXCITED ABOUT THE CUTTER KAI AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
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I ALSO LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
HLKDHFS AURA
okay sun we gettin a lil cap happy
another pretty eijun shottttt
WHOA 3D BALL
3D SLOWMO BALL
N* H* TT * R
i feel like i jinxed him sorry eijun
also i LOVE when the stands yell OSH OSH OSH back
wow toujou's voice was. so cute??
noriiiii i love you so much and thank you
furuya silently reflecting huh?
YO WTF IN THE MANGA NORI'S CAP COVERS FURUYA'S NUMBER WTF ANIMATORS ITS ICONIC
awww theyre all patting him i wanna pat eijun too
NORIIIIII YOU ARE SO PRECIOUS
kanemaru's eyes are gray??
kousei-san.......... mayhaps i have.......... Feelings about this
"gureato" man tahara is great
HLJSKDFHKGSFJGKFHDGLDF BLONDE AMAHISA
THIS IS JUST FUELING MY AMAKURA LMAOOO
WHY IS BLONDE HAIR IN MIDDLE SCHOOL A RUNNING JOKE IN ANIME
kuramochi, amahisa, hyuuga from knb, alla dem yankees
oh my god is that suddenly shaved head amahisa still in first year he's so smol
wow kousei is so eccentric haha i love it
YESSS BRINGING BACK MANAKA-BOY
omg yakushi cameo!!
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wow this is so pleasant to look at and idk why??
his eyeeesss
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and this too omgg
I SEE NISHINO
omgggg are they who i think they are
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YES THEY AREANIMATORS REALLY BE FEEDING ME TODAY
sorry mimei that was too much tension in a single glance not to be homoerotic
go shirasu-senpai!
wellll shit, rip zono and rip seidou
142 pitches???????? are they throwing out amahisa's arm imma fight
YO OKAY BUT DOES THIS MEAN INAJITSU VS ICHIDAI
"that wouldnt be any fun" uh you do realize you're talking about a person's physical health right audience member???
the. ace. is. not. the. only. player.
its okay this is the peanut gallery they dont matter in the long run
omg are the first years wearing their school uniform slacks
AWWWW TAKU OFFERED TO CARRY SAWAMURA'S BAG
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taku always worried about everyone and sawamura looking rather nice actually
HLJSKFDHGD AMAHISA'S FACE LIGHTING UP AT EIJUN
omg was that a little bow eijun made at amahisa before moving on?
"something i want to ask you" are you boutta ask him out amahisa
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im sorry i love eyes too much
and also! eijun getting the recognition he deserves!! buuuut from another team rip
cmon eijun he's trying to be nice tbh
lmao koushuu and shirakawa should meet... resting bitch face club 
"i've never seen kousei-san take interest in another pitcher" THERE ARE SO MANY THINGS TO UNPACK IN THIS STATEMENT
LMAO HE DID HE DID ASK FOR HIS LINE
my sonsssss
yes asada and kuki, be free! go move around!
asdkfh i just squee every time taku
and these lines on koushuu look so nice??
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intense son
scremmm
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he's so happy and fired up to see koushuu fired up im
wholeass Sons™
lmao koushuu getting mad for sawamura
my inexperience... yes kataoka
teito and inajitsu coaches lmao
500K rivals to fwb to lovers
ive always thought kunitomo's neck crack is so funny
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UHHHHH CARLOSHIRA REALLY TOYING WITH MY HEART HERE
THIS IS NOT OKAY
IM NOT OKAY
mochi looking mighty fine in this shot
aw... ejun sitting alone....
just wanna say oda and kuroki very lesbian in the ED
preview
ooh mei batting
sawamura and furuya watching so intently!!
INUI KENGOOOOOO
aw... eijun turning to harucchi for support
oh man third years...
SUMMARY (7/16):
eijun DOUBLES!! 
rip seidou tho 
amahisa's eyes??? pretty??? 
ATTACC BY INAJITSU CAMEO 
taku offering to carry eijun's bag + serious senpai face 
careful amahisa your gay is showing 
koushuu mad on eijun's behalf lmao
inajitsu vs teito next!
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7/23 LIVEBLOG:
ah yes, that tension-filled mimei look
CAN THEY STOP TESTING ME WITH CARLOSHIRA SCREENS
ooh this parallel of mei and mukai #1s
why does mei look so young at bat lmao
rather nice shot of mukai tbh
omg that tiny background akamatsu is adorable
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WOW i love this shot
hell yeah mei kicking ass and taking names
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boi... what you doin
KANETOU RIGHTS
kuraharu rights too!!
wow mochi's voice, never over it
BOI ARE THEY JUST SHOWING SHIPS LOOK AT MINORI
lookit mochi bein a good senpai
ooh eijun finally said no huh
mochi and harucchi look so concerned tbh i am too
mm and miyuki and furuya too huh
WHAT IS THIS BLEP STAHP
oowada always cracks me up lmao
esp when mine is so grave next to her
oh so mukai likes gambling? im not surprised lmaooo
INUI-SANNN I LOVE YOUUU
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THE BOIIII
HE
H E
H I M S T
omg the way tetsu says carlos sounds all proud and im soft
PRETTY BOIS DOIN J O B S
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GETTIN THAT BREAD
omg two RBIs too good job shirakawa!!!
omg im so glad mei encouraged itsuki
have i ever mentioned
inui x mukai RIGHTS
ESP THIS SEQUENCE OF MUKAI (AND INUI) PRACTICING
BOIIII
that toujou face... some toujou and mukai art i saw comes to mind
DAMN THE IMAGE WHEN INUI HITS IM WOW
also is carlos actually wearing his compression undershirt holy wow
he didnt used to at least
ANYWAY INUI DINGERRRRRRRRRRRRRR
HELL YAHHH
omg was that a little tiger next to inui SO CUTE
oh my god "mei-san mei-san" too cute
LMAO TOO LONG
MEI I SWEAR
yoo mei you okay there
SLOW MO BALL
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okay why does he look so good please
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OKAY WHY DOES HE LOOK SO GOOD PLEASE
do you know how many times i had to rewind for this screenshot
shirakawa also looks good frustrated fuckle
mei stop shakin off signs dammit
ooh nice akamatsu shot
seidou shares one (1) brain cell in this screen
much too short a game damn...
ive heard we were robbed of itsuki's blush??? cause hello i need catcher catcher goodness with him and inui
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omg... they're literal children
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SSLKDFHLSKDHGSSTOPPPPPPPPP
IM WEAK OKAY
I KNOW IT
I ACCEPT IT
HOW DAREMSTDVE
AND HIS V O I C E
WTFFFFFFFFFFFFF
hahaha anyway im just laughing at carlos being a momentary harada
"mei-san" !!!
mei x mukai... so chaotic
wow amahisa looks so nice???
lmao they really didnt HAVE to put harucchi in the bg when miyuki's talking to furuya but they DID
miyuki... looking at mei too long not to be homo there
eijun :c
oh man
that really hurt
the face of a SON tho
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"so you are human after all" so many things i want to say about this
sawamura... doesn't seem to hold a grudge against furuya at all and honestly wow...
tho its def not furuya's fault i think thats a mark of him being pretty mature!
anyway im glad furuya wants to watch the video too
also nabe!!!!! i wonder how close eijun and nabe are and how many times eijun has bothered him for the videos haha
ochiai, a backup catcher... interesting
"he must overcome this on his own" do you know how many problems there are with this statement
yeah it wasnt fair
"for better or for worse" are you kidding
oh furusawa lmaoo
and nabe just patient over there
oh hello masayui and kanetou
anime fist clench
koushuu!!!
oh man miyuki introspection......... i know where this is going.........
appreciating sawamura's hard work and optimism!!!!!
HE IS READY DAMMIT
how many more times does he have to prove it to you
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loveLY but also reused?
WOW IM EMOTIONAL ALL THESE MEMORIES...
ALSO THIS IS PRETTY DAMN GAY...
and the shadow of miyuki in the background... WOW
three months............. until the third years retire...........................................
im not okA Y............................
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all the things this smile hides
preview
BOI YOU ALREADY PITCH THAT WELL
wow too many sons
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
BABY TAKUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
AND BABY KOUSHUU
END CARD WITH MANAGERS AAA CUTE
SUMMARY (7/26):
mei kicking ass and taking names 
mukai and his fooken BLEP 
PRETTY INAJITSU BOIS DOIN JOBS 
INUI DINGERRR 
inui/mukai rights 
mei + mukai actual CHILDREN 
carloshira stop attaccing sun challenge f a iled 
eijun @ harucchi :c 
three months... 
SEE YOU NEXT WEEK! 
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sharkytrash7 · 6 years
Text
My last say. Hopefully not my final essay.
So I've been watching YouTube videos of how to get over ex's and how to deal with break ups. In my heart, I know we belong together. I know the fact that I'm not Christian is a problem. My arguement is that you never fell in love with an atheist. You fell in love with me. Its tough when you refer to me as atheist because I'm so much more then that. You of all people know that. I love you with all my heart. I want to marry you still. I'm not of being alone or being without you. I'm scared of what I am without you. To be honest you were and still are my guardian angel in my eyes. You've changed my life and I hate to see you leave. You keep emphasizing that we might not be together but I still have hope we'll be together. After all, you have my rib. I know things are hard for you at the moment with God. Its tough for me 2. I go to afda and put on a smile pretending I'm fine. You want to be with a Christian. I get that. But no Christian will be as good as I am to you. Even tough I'm not a Christian, I can try to be the best person in the world for you. I dont love for your looks or your voice or cause you give me affection or cause you buy me stuff or cause you did things to me. Its all those things and more. I love you cause youre you. I would never change anything about you. Even your cute toes. Once upon a time I promised you I'd convert for you. I want to make this clear ! I am not trying to manipulate you in any way shape or or form ! Im just venting to tumblr. I'd keep my promise. It wouldnt be for you or for me but for us. Cause your right woman ! Its just better if we're both Christian. I know your gonna be thinking, "hmmmm, hes probably just saying this so I get back with him. He just wants me back. What an ass" and it does look like that. Thats why. Huh. Idk actually. I guess it is kinda fucked up to say this. Kinda shity cause then it would make your life 10 times harder. Okay so ignore that bit. Im not deleting it because effort AND because I said it / typed it with meaning and for a reason.
I get why we dont talk because if your parents find out they'll lose their minds and also because I'm pulling you away from your God things. But like when will I be able to date you. Ya know. Like even if I was Christian, your parents would still hate me. And if your parents forgave me. I wouldnt be Christian. So i get your side of life. Cause thats tough cookie. I wish our love could be enough because it is lowkey for us. Its a rough one. I wanna tell you so many things but i dont wanna jinx your future. I just find it crazy that you think your going to marry someone else. People have been saying its just because your my first girlfriend but I dont believe em. I felt a connection with you. Something I dont see happening with anyone else. You keep telling not to wait for you but its what I feel is right. Just like how you said it feels right to break up. I dont think this will last forever. We'll I wont be able to last much longer but. I feel like we've got this. We've been through a lot together and I'm positive about us. When I said us not being together would be a watse I didnt mean a waste of time or money or anything. I just meant it would be crazy for us to go through everything we did just to let (a big deal) get in the way. I love you. I love you. I LOVE YOU MY BOO !
Lowkey in the back of my head thinking this
I know I said these things but I cant hold you to anything. You could be over me and my shit and want another relationship. I have to deal with that. If you want some buff white english indie guy to come love you then that the way it'll be.
Deep down I want it to be though. Like I want to be your knight. Your dark knight _wink wink_. I know eternal life is a big thing for you and I'd like to be there with you to. I dont really know if I'll be accepted up in heaven. Even if i am a Christian. Im hard on myself like that. Id rather let more deserving people go to heaven. Idk why I put myself. Its just me. I just see potential in others. More so than in myself. I see my purpose on earth as a chance to help others. You know. Plus im sure when (i cant remember the name of it) the blue lights come down and take people to heaven. Im sure I'll meet you up there. Your just so scared of messing up like one thing and I get it I was like that 2. Id make sure everything was planned out. Truth is. I hd to stop being scared in order to move forward. Like after my car accident. I was terrified to drive again. I couldnt deal with driving. But i had to get over it. And I know you blame yourself and God for what happened. Please dont. Everything happens for a reason. I feel like that stuff taught me a lesson about being calm and calming myself down. It definitely wasnt God punishing you for being with me. Again not trying manipulate you or preach to you or try to change your thoughts. Its just my opinion. All I'm hoping you do is consider what I'm saying. I really truley am sorry about everything but at the same time. Everything that happened has happened and its made us who we are. If given the chance I'd do it again.
Also lowkey I'd love to celebrate 2 years with you. #nopressure. Like seriously I'm being serious but at the same time dont stress you cute little head about it. If it doesnt happen it doesnt happen.
My eating habits have gotten worse. Idk. Im lowkey scared im dying. I want to go to the doctor but its expensive and I've been such a burden on my parents. I'm pretty sure I can wait a couple years before getting it checked up.
My new glasses are cool. You have to see yhem in person. That another thing. I thought i wouldve seen you by now just driving or something. But i guess you only really drive to church and home. Or to someones house or like a party thing.
Happy 21st birthday baby. Wow. Your getting like so old. I still remember falling in love with the 19 year old you. Look how far we came. A whole 2 years. Youve grown so much since then. Firstly you don't bump into cars xD. Jk. You really have become such a grown up and I've been blessed being there with you. You became independent and youve become yourself. Its was a wild trip but to see you come out on top has been worth it. You deserve the world. And if anyone tries to hurt you / stop you, send em my way. Youre one of the most beautiful intelligent cutest amazingest bestest person in the whole world. Happy Birthday Boo.
The boo tattoo. We getting em together ? Also all your stuff is still here so if you do move out invite me over sometime so i can drop off these things. Lowkey your life is amazing and spontaneous and I have huge FOMO (fear of missing out). You don't to worry about me tho. I've been waiting to do things with you.
Moving out. Yeah. Its a big possibility next for me. I remember you originally said we can't live together which sucked but made sense. So. If you ever need a place to stay. Call me. I'll set up a guest bedroom for you.
I wasnt going to with your dad a happy birthday because you never with mine I dont think. But im not a monster like you. Jk lol. You probs just forgot.
Also it really sucks you cant speak 2 me. Your not an asshole. I just wish you could've helped me calm down.
Im sorry this was so long. I'm sure Ive forgotten things and said things I shouldnt have but tbh its been kinda theraputic for me. Like I feel a lot better having got thise things off my chest. You dont have to reply to anything yet. Cause I know your brains busy atm. If you can acknowledge that you seen it that would be nice. But ja. Please dont take anything Ive said personally or strongly. I just blurped things out and yes things do have meaning. But it takes two to tango. I desperately want to tango with you though.
Ps I love you
Pps Im sorry
Ppps take me back
Pppps jk. not jk
Yours truly
Triston Kyle Pillay (Penguin)
3:36 Vala is today. Shhhh
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bluebuckstallion · 6 years
Text
kinda ramble-y fic below the cut, includes a metric fuck-ton of angst, macdennis, teen au, drinking, and a Lot of implied abuse/trauma
summary: macs a rebellious 14 year old tht hates the rich, dennis is a dick that really just needs an outlet to share his feelings, theyre sad together
ok no offense but i just...really love the concept of like, teen mac & charlie crashing house parties. them sneaking out of the house together and their late night adventures quickly becoming a blur of adrenaline and laughter as they jus show up at random parties someone down the street is throwing. they show up undetected at the peak of the utter chaos that is teen rebellion, take a shitload of booze, and then ditch just as fast. they go by the train tracks after and get wasted together, drowning out the deafening reality that is their parents dont care enough to notice theyre not at home every night & that life isnt going so well. and for once they can be happy in each others company and have a taste of a childhood they deserved, even if they can only find it at the bottom of a bottle
one night mac goes off by himself, probably because charlie just hasnt been as up to going out. mac has no clue why, the only things charlie’s been sputtering about between drinks every night is his ‘son of a bitch of an uncle’ who moved back in recently. mac doesnt understand and charlie wont give him what he needs to understand it. so mac gives it no second thought. he spots this absolutely huge house in the suburbs. hes never seen something with architecture like this and hell sure as hell never understand how someone can afford so much room, or what its even used for. the yard is donned with blacked out kids he knows from his classes, and the inside of the house is filled with the melody of drunk kids slurring and laughing to party songs.
he decides this is it-this is the one place hell allow himself to go without his best friend. and hell definitely save booze for him. and he wont allow himself to feel guilty for it, he never does anything for himself anyways. he strides in with a nonchalant facade and his best ‘yes-i-definitely-belong-here’ smile from cheek to cheek, waving at classmates that never noticed him before and definitely wont now. which is the only advantage that comes from being the rat, one of the sore losers in the bullshit hierarchy that is high school popularity. nobody will notice when youre taking something right infront of them.
he makes it to the kitchen and finally pieces together who lives here-its the piece of shit he has half his classes with, the word snob as a person, someone he cant help but loathe for his gross elitism. its dennis reynolds. some kid thats really full of himself, someone who helped trademark ‘the rat’ and laughs at mac while hes down. he didnt really mind, its not like he was bullying charlie, and he was strong enough to take the half-assed insults this guy threw at him. it wasnt a big deal.
but here, now-he found dennis in the midst of his own party, alone in the kitchen, half-empty bottle of tequila in tow, and what looked like mascara trailing from his eyes. what a pussy is what he was about to say, but something stopped him. dennis looked at the other boy looming over him and flinched, covering his face instantly. mac was confused, what the hell was he doing that for? when dennis realized he was fine, he instantly tried to revert back to his cool guy defense mode. something compelled mac to crouch down next to him because, well geez, the poor kid was a mess.. and he felt like it humanized him. the urge to steal his things for a taste of a life he never had slowly died down as he said hello to the gracious party host himself. “why-are-you-here”s  were spit out instantly, because dennis didn’t remember inviting some dirty street rat to his party. mac gave a really half-assed excuse, which was all he needed to convince dennis he was supposed to be here, considering all his thoughts were mush from how out of it he was-he never had the opportunity to drink this much on account of his sister beating him to it, or his mom emptying everything after heated arguments with his dad. and although it annoyed him when she was drunk, it was better than falling asleep to the melody of fighting and the threat of an impending divorce.
but anyways, now mac is lost in his eyes and they’re both half a bottle of tequila down, and he isnt sure if hes holding his hand or just dreaming it. and oh god, his eyes are so beautiful and his lips are coated with strawberry chapstick and he wants to kiss them so bad, he wants to keep holding his hand for all of eternity but at the same time he wants to hold his face in his hands and wow he wants to kiss him so bad and to taste the strawberry chapstick and god, hes infatuated. he wants to wipe his tears away and to kiss his rosy cheeks and run his hands through his hair, so bad. and it hits him that hes too deep, what would charlie think of this? falling for the enemy? fuck. but that doesnt matter because all that matters now is the fact hes really hand in hand with someone hes fallen in love with, and all it took was talk of trauma and a bottle of tequila.
theyre no longer on the kitchen floor as theyre giggling hand in hand stumbling up the stairs, leaning on each other and shushing one another as they laugh too hard to smile right and their cheeks are flush and they arent sure if its the drinking or their company. theyre trying to be quiet as they close the door to the twins’ room and dennis tries to lock it with a shaky hand. mac watches him in utter jaw-dropping awe, feeling butterflies fill his stomach and suffocating any insecurity hed ever felt before. this was new to him. but dennis felt it even stronger. hed spent so long building up a wall, hed spent so long listening to his mothers vodka-fueled lectures about never letting yourself fall in love. barbara made him promise hed never do that to himself, it hurt too much she told him. but now he was sitting on the top bunk of his bed with what seemed to be the boy of his dreams, he didnt know he could ever feel this way or honestly feel anything at all, and he was too drunk to feel guilty for it.
hours pass and now mac is laying on his bare chest. dennis has his hands intertwined in his hair and hes taken away by how soft it is when he strokes it. macs never felt a wave of clarity envelop him so softly before. hes at peace. all the droning hum of party music is drowned out. all he can hear is the soft rhythm of their hearts and their cautious breathing, both scared that this still might not be real. macs heart flutters when he realizes dennis’ breathing gets faster as he moves his hand across his chest, and he looks up with half-slit puppy dog eyes that dennis is absolutely in love with. mac opens his mouth to speak, but changes his mind. he doesnt wanna jinx it, hes so scared he wont be able to impress cool kid dennis reynolds, and he doesnt wanna do anything to change this moment. he plays it safe. as he snuggles closer, dennis holds him and macs face is the warmest its ever been, and he buries it in the other boys chest. he doesnt know how to react to this, hes never known how to react to anything but especially nothing like this. his face is even warmer than macs and hes trying so hard to not let him know that he likes him because thats something his mom would be ashamed of. mac falls asleep on his chest, and dennis cant stop playing with his hair.
dennis wakes him up because he knows everything would be ruined if anyone found them together, especially his sister. god knows what she would do. and dennis tries to tell him he should leave, but the words choke him too much to come out when he sees macs adorable face glance up at him. and hes just too shy to say a word.
the next thing they know, dennis pulls him closer and theyre both kissing for the first time, and mac feels wrong. he wants to push him away and he knows he should feel absolutely horrible, he knows god would be disappointed in something like this and hes terrified of the consequences hell get. but he pushes the thoughts away and succumbs to the warmth that surrounds his body. dennis is holding him so gently and neither want to ever move again, and something compels them to stay together. the kiss is only broken by dennis’ nervous laughter, and a smile that he cant hide. and when the boys recollect themselves they start kissing again. they never went further than that, partially because they couldnt get it up this drunk and partially because they were too scared to ruin it, but it was still nice to fall asleep side by side, even if they didnt mean to
mac wakes up to the soft golden smile of the suns rays against the bed, and he vaguely remembers last night. panic sets in like it never has before. hes never stayed somewhere else this late before. what if charlie’s looking for him. what if whoever hes with didnt lock the door and someone saw him. and then he remembers who hes with, and hes terrified. what the hell did he do? he feels tears of shame well up because he knows hes a sinner in gods eyes and hes made the biggest mistake of his life, and oh fuck when he tried to get out from under the covers he woke dennis up. he isnt even half as shocked as mac is, hes calm. hes happy. hes never woke up so peacefully before, and hes grinning. he tries to tell mac good morning but hes rambling under his breath about how wrong this is and hes going to hell, and dennis takes that as a sign he shouldve taken his mothers advice. hes utterly crushed.
mac doesnt even apologize as he leaves, he slips on his boots and gets out as soon as he can despite the wavering tone in dennis’ protests and pleads to stay. he forgets his jacket during the rush. he leaves dennis confused and more scared of opening up than hes ever been, and he doesnt know how to deal with his feelings anymore. mac tries to forget everything. he never tells charlie. he doesnt ever want to look dennis in the eyes again. he never wants to feel that way again, because he went from feeling on top of the world to being ashamed and thinking he knows its wrong. he doesnt tell anyone.
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