#from that into english? or the other way around?
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ere-the-sun-rises · 2 days ago
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I love the Odyssey and I genuinely think everyone ahould read it (the Robert Fagles English translation the most accessible I've come across and it has an audiobook narrates by Ian McKellan!) bit here are some other facts from your local tumblr Classicist:
The Odyssey was actually translated into Latin many times well before the 1510 date Community Notes provides. That one is just the oldest Latin translation we have that survives (and it's in Biblical Latin, so it's ugly as fuck Latin - I'm sorry Biblical Latinists, but Classical Latin is prettier in every conceivable way)
The Greek poem was actually written sometime around ~800 BCE (ei. almost 3000 years ago) and is thought to be one of the first literary pieces from the dawn of Greek writing (including the Iliad and some other lost works)
It has some of the earliest examples of comple literary tropes, themes and structures we have (think thinks like in medias res, foreshadowing, unreliable narrator (depending on your interpretation), character study, etc).
This thing is a novel's worth in POEM FORM. i cannot stress enough how impressive it is to tell a whole novel's worth of story in POEM FORMAT.
Ans not just any old poem - "epic poetry" refers to a specific kind of poetry. Like Shakespeare is iambic pentameter, Homer is dacyllic hexameter*
The narrative is really good and very compelling. Odysseus really loves his wife, man.
It was originally oral history/entertainment!
In short, I highly recommend reading it (or evem better, listening to it).
*Iambic pentameter is five feet of iambic meter - or five beats of long-short stresses. This is the most natural and consistent beat for English. In Greek, the meter is six beats of long-short-short stresses.
I’m living for The Odyssey discourse on Twitter right now because some people are like, “You’ve never heard of the odyssey” and other people are like, “some people don’t speak English and haven’t read your little American book.”
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slushfaerie · 2 days ago
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okay so…fratboy!patrick...
(truly my beloved. from this post ! stoner!art coming soon. filth below the cut)
you meet in a random discussion section for one of your sophomore english classes. get assigned to peer review each other's papers. he’s a sweetheart on the down low.
he’s one of those frat boys that shows up to your 8am section hungover or even still drunk with those fucking black sunglasses on. he talks about his conquests from the night before with his boys before class but still grabs you papers from the stack being passed around by the TA and hands them to you, your fingers brushing against his.
patrick invites you to the party at his frat house one week towards the end of the term, not thinking you'd show up. but he can't hold back a grin when he sees you walk up, pushing by the new pledge they'd made stand as a bouncer.
he watches you dance and take shots with your roommates and he can't keep his eyes off you..but he's just…surveying the party…that’s it.
patrick's the one who makes the announcement, “if you’re not a brother or with a brother, get the Fuck out.” to the whole party at the end of the night. 
when that one creepy brother approaches to try and hit on you, hoping to get lucky, patrick wraps his arm around you, making a show of whispering in your ear and taking too much pleasure in the way the creep’s face falls.
"wanna go to the roof? grab some air?" he pulls the cigarette from behind his ear with a grin.
as you climb the stairs to the rooftop of the frat house, patrick's hand wanders to land on your hip as he pulls you closer. he's crushed his 4th beer of the night and you'd taken shots and had some of the jungle juice. neither of you mind the way it feels, him so close to you.
you share a smoke on the roof and he makes you laugh, his smile lines illuminated by moonlight as he tries to insistently point out constellations in the light-polluted Palo Alto sky. you try to look away from him, stay detached, brush him off. but you can't help that he's funny.
despite your efforts to stay away, you can't help yourself. your night ends with his tongue down your throat. he tastes like beer and cigarettes and looks at you like he wants to ruin you, just so he can piece you back together. wants to have you all for himself. you can't resist his gravity.
patrick takes you to his messy room in the frat house, kissing you with wild lips and tongue against the door, air thick with tension, before peeling off your clothes.
he guides you to your elbows and knees, your hands gripping the soft fabric of the sheets on his unmade bed.
he places slow kisses up the skin of your back before teasing the seam of your cunt with the tip of his cock, laughing as you shudder for him.
“oh…you like that? tell me what else you want..”
you’re practically putty in his hands, making all kinds of noises, trying to get him to stop teasing.
patrick can’t hold back his “fuck, baby…” as he finally enters you.
as he fucks you from behind, his hand reaches around from where it rested on your hip to rub your clit with his fingers almost sweetly, the gesture a stark contrast to the brutal way he was taking you.
patrick gives you a smirk as he continues to fuck into you. you look up to his eyes meeting yours in the reflection of his closet door mirror.
"god, look how pretty you are."
he gives your ass a spank before thrusting all the way in, tonguing your neck before he leans down, his chest molding to your back as he presses you down into the bed, impossibly deeper inside you.
"you're squeezing the hell out of me, y'know that?" he whispers in your ear as he covers your hand with his.
"can't believe this pretty little pussy..taking me so good..”
guess you're with a brother now.
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cyberdollface · 3 days ago
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╔══ ❀•° Daisy Chains °•❀ ══╗
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Summary: You seduce your dad's best friend, the hound of the underground.
fem!reader x Vander.
Warnings: smut with a little tiny bit of plot; size kink; sexual frustration; sexual tension; masturbation; fantasizing; teasing; slightly bratty reader that torments Vander.
word count: 4.457.
Sorry for any mistakes, english is not my first language.
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Your dad asked you to take the order for the newest deal inside the store, as it was too heavy for Ekko, his new adopted kid, to gather from the spot you were on to the middle of the alleys 3 feet below.
Your dad’s best friend was there too. The big, mighty Vander was busy saving a small salesman from a beating and making the dealer pay the money. It was cute how caring he could be to the nation of Zaun—his people. It made you want him more. 
You were a teenager, barely 16 years old, when everyone followed him, marching to the other side of the bridge, and taking the first seat when it all came down. Now, you were standing in the same place as they did, but 10 years later.
You admired the old man, the best guy around Benzo. You even missed him while doing business away from home in the Noxus Empire, but you couldn't deny it. He looked even better now with his softer belly and pepper and salt hair.
You felt his gaze before you could see it. He had been looking at you since you got back to town. You pretended that you didn't see his longing eyes on you every time you went to the Last Drop with your friends in your short, pretty dresses, or whenever you hung out with Vi and the kids, teaching them to climb their way up to Piltover.
He always got himself together, though. One who wasn't chasing his behaviors wouldn't have noticed, but you did. You loved his attention; how couldn't you? Being desired wasn't new to you, but it being him made it different. All that authority and aura made you feel a little bit cogent. You couldn't help it; it was going to your head.
His eyes following you when you walked away for the day or even fixed your voluminous hair couldn't go unnoticed for you. Even around your poor, unaware father…  Benzo could not even suspect it. His own friend gawking at his older daughter, full family gatherings passing around more rapidly with your new game of catching his attention.
Vander approached you, cutting off your thoughts:
“Where are you going with all that heavy stuff?” 
It wasn't late, the sky had just got dark.
“I'm going to drop this off at the shop” You smiled at him. “I wouldn't mind some help, you know.”
He raised his eyebrows, contorting his face into a slight grin.
“Can’t deny helping a lady, right?” His posture straightened when he heard your giggles as if he was more sure of himself now.
You kept walking steady, even though one step of his equaled two of your own, he was ensuring that you were walking at the same pace. You guys even managed to make small talk now and then, cutting through the crowd.
“You’re going to the market tomorrow? Heard there's gonna be some good stuff there.” 
He said to you while minding his steps.
“Of course, I'm going, Van. Wanna buy some more skirts and dresses, you know? Quite like this one I'm wearing” You smiled again.
“It looks cute on me, doesn't it?” You posed for him the best way you could with the small box in your arms. Of course, he grabbed the bigger one to carry.
His eyes went momentarily darker as he stared at you. It lasted only for a few seconds before Vander averted his eyes. A trash can now looked really interesting at that moment.
“Yeah, it looks… good on you.”
You were having too much fun.
As you two neared the back of the shop, you thanked him, soon enough you would be putting the boxes away in the stock and closing its locks. 
“You know what else I want to buy at the store?” He leaned in closer to you to hear you better. 
“A new nail polish. It's green, kinda yellowish” You hold your hand in front of you, passing one finger atop a nail as to illustrate the act of painting them.
“Hmm, quite close to this color” you approached him, lightly touching the buttons of his shirt.
He stopped breathing, swallowing thickly while looking at your hand on him. He cleared his throat.
“I better get going, you know… open up the bar.” You couldn't help but laugh a little, looking up at him through your browns.
You had his full attention, Vander was radiating heat, and you could almost taste his want for you, for something.
“You wanna fuck me, right?”  You ask him while playing with the buttons on his shirt. You couldn't help but notice how big he was, standing at least 40 centimeters taller, his frame twice your size even though you weren't exactly a small girl.
His left hand goes to your waist, playing with the bow tied to your red dress. You lift your eyes to hold his gaze, raising an eyebrow.
"You know I would do anything, for it – for you. But we can't, you know it right? We shouldn't – I shouldn't"
It was working—hell, yeah, it was working. It made you feel powerful, how much of a reaction you could get from a man like Vander, especially when you knew he wasn't so easily charmed.
"Well, that's a real bummer, huh? I need someone like you...—" You made a show of tightening your arms together, showing more of your cleavage to his hungry eyes. "... Ya know, I've been thinking 'bout it, daydreaming, but it's never enough. Can't ever fill me deep enough with my fingers, it doesn't matter how hard I imagine it's your hand instead of my own." 
You pout at him, grabbing his fingers from his right hand just feeling how wide and long they are, not stopping your mind from wondering how they would feel inside. Could you even accommodate more than one? Hell, you would die to know. You let out a hot breath and realized that the hand you were holding was trembling. Did you just make the hound of the underground shake?
You grab him, making him press you more against the wall, one of his legs between your tights. The slit in your long dress gets higher and higher the more you flex your thigh.
Vander let his head lay low on the wall, his nose right in the curls of your hair. It smells good, he thinks, it's always good. He took a deep breath, no more fighting the hard-on he was growing.
"Think about you too, princess... Too fucking often" He pinches your waist then drags his hand lower and lower, reaching the skin of your thigh revealed by the slip in your dress.
You reach between your bodies and put your hand on top of his to ground him, making him grab the fat of your thigh harder. It made you gasp a little, eyes closed but you didn't need then to know he lifted his head to peek at your reaction. Fuck your face was pretty... Dark skin shone with the low lamplight of the street you were in.
The frenzy you two were in reached its end as you heard a loud crack on the streets, followed by voices.
It was like his mind returned to earth, his hands were more sure of themselves, Vander cleared his throat, getting off your hold and adjusting your dress.
As he distanced himself, you couldn't help but finally look at the obvious bulge in his pants. It was promising and Vander could feel the wet spot he made in his trousers with his precum.
You knew that he was close to breaking. You would eventually get what you wanted; you always did.
You watched as he fixed himself, trying to hide the taint but failing, his cheeks pink.
He tried looking at you over the wall, the disappointing expression on your features, damn you were pouting again. The sight made him throb in his pants so he looked away.
"I should go, fuck, should've never come with you in the first place–" he passed a hand through his hair, which was falling in his face and sighted "– Good night, I guess."
You will eventually get what you want, you told yourself. You always did. 
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Vander avoided you for some days, never letting his eyes lay on you for too long, making conversation short. He could see that he was getting on your dark side by denying you attention.
He couldn't help it, he already had a good imagination by just flirting, your little escapade with him only served to feed into his fantasy.
In the late nights, he found himself palming his trousers, mind drifting to you. Vander wished he would have kissed you that night, smudging that pretty shiny lip gloss off your lips. He grunted slowly, he hated that he had to do that again, beating one off to his friend’s daughter. Fuck he was disgusting, but the kids were sleeping, he had time for this at the very least. Vander never thought he was being so obvious, but honestly, how could he help it? When you went to his bar on Friday nights you always wore the thinnest mini skirts ever, fuck that black one was his favorite, hanging low on your hips, your soft tummy lightly poking out… The memory made him throb. 
Suddenly his pants were too tight, he needed some relief, needed you. Sitting upright in his bed, he pulled his sweatpants down below his balls, just enough to free his cock. He let his imagination hang free, thinking about how easy it would've been to just bend you on one of the tables, making you feel him, how you made him feel. 
He spat on his hand, leading it to his dick, smearing it up and down. You would have offered your body to him, he knew that now. Fuck, what type of panties would you wear? One time he got a peek, white and frilly with some lace, really cute. Vander loved your thighs, he knew it would feel amazing between his hands, around his cock. His hands were working faster on his length, he was panting a little, biting his cheek to remind himself not to make too much noise, that the last thing he needed was some of his kids waking up.
You always smelled so good too, sweet, it was sweet. In his fantasy you giggled at him that way he found endearing, looking back at him and arching your soft body so the skirt would flip over your butt.
He was getting close, fuck his balls were aching so much, he needed that release.
You nodded at him, as to say ‘Go ahead, Van’ wiggling your bottom to encourage him, he didn't need to be rushed twice, he touched your ass, countering the fabric of the frills, when he got to the bottom he found the spot wet, it was so easy to imagine himself pulling the cloth aside and filling you up. You looked tiny under him. God, he tried his fingers around his fat tip in the upstroke to mimic the tightness of your hole, letting out a grunt. It was all he needed to cum in his hands, cursing your name under his breath. Fuck, he was disgusting. 
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God, he prayed Benzo would forgive him. Vander can never let this fantasy of his come to life if he gets all worked up with just a few stolen glances and some dirty talk… Imagine what actually fucking you would do to him? 
“We are closed.”
You said when you heard the door from Benzo’s open thinking it was just a regular customer. To your surprise, it was Vander, and by his stunned face, you could see that he wasn't expecting to see you behind the counter.
He stood there awkwardly, sucking his teeth and gazing at his feet with a pack of papers in his hands.
“I thought Benzo was working today, I’ll… I’ll come back another time.”
You rolled your eyes at him and said: 
“My dad will come back at night. You should look for him around 8 pm, Van.”
You said while returning to paint your nails on the counter. He recognized the color, it was that green nail polish you had talked about that night.  You had indeed bought new dresses in the market, he had memorized your everyday clothes by now. That dress you were wearing right now was pretty, the pinkish color looked good on you.
He was already turning his back to leave when you dared to speak again:
“You have nothing to say, Vander?”
He sighed. You have always been stubborn since you were a teenager. He turned around irritated, his brows furrowed ready to scold you.
“I’m sorry about that, okay? Shouldn't have never gone that far.” His eyes were sharp as he was exasperated for just having to talk about that.
It made you even angrier. That day you played with yourself all night because that stupid man didn't want— no he didn't dare to finish the job. He left you hot and wanting in that damn alleyway.
“Now you say you didn't mean it? Hells Vander, now I am offended!”
You finished painting your nails and got off the bench, pouting as you made your way to the center of the store.
“We both know damn well what you did when you got home that night… You've been rubbing one off thinking about me for quite some time now.”  Now you were standing in front of him, trying to look mean, pointing at his chest with your manicured nails.
“Too bad you're too much of a pussy to do something with the real thing.” 
You waited for his reaction with a smug look on your features. Did you want attention? You would get attention.
He took a sharp breath and looked down at you. Vander was getting tired of this game of cat and mouse, if there was a proper time to solve the issue, it was now.
He sighed loudly before saying:
“Stop this shit, you know damn well we can't do this.” His voice was low, holding a bite to the words.
 It was a warning, he freed his hands from the paper and held your arm down. It made you smile, he was so much stronger than you, and you wondered what he could use that strength for.
He saw the grin on your lips and he tightened his grasp on you, face twitching into something dangerous. You pressed against him, closing the distance even more, not running from him.
You flexed your fingers in the air, your hand in an odd position with the way he was gripping you. It was like the world disappeared around you two, you wanted to kiss him, make him lose it, so you got on your tiptoes, your face closer to Vanders now, being able to feel his breath on your face.
“Not asking you to marry me, ya know? Just asking to be fucked…” You sneaked your other hand up to his side, grabbing the fabric of his shirt near his hips tight with your fingers. Oh, you hoped you didn't ruin your nails with all this playing.
He leaned down on impulse, only realizing his movement when you two kissed. Vander pressed you more against him, if it was even possible to get closer, now one hand was still gripping your arm as the other went to your waist. The hound tasted addicting, like mint and cigars. You moaned slightly in his mouth.
“Thought you could do this for me… Been wanting this for so long ” You said, making a trail of kisses from the corner of his mouth down his bearded jaw as his right hand kneaded your skin, feeling up your body.
“Know you want it too, old man. So why not just do it?”
You said with your lips grazing his. Vander couldn't escape your affection, you had him wrapped around your daisy chains. 
He brought you forcefully around the counter, getting you easily on top of it. 
He kissed you with purpose, as to compensate for how long he took to do it, even though he was still apprehensive to touch you.
You let your hands wander from around his neck to his big shoulders, down his muscled arms, finally reaching his hands and leading them around your bum.
Vander groaned, breaking your kiss away, and gathered your skirt past your hips, revealing your lower body. He broke the kiss away to take in the sight, his body between your legs with you on the counter. 
He could see your soaked panties from this angle. Damn, he was losing it. He gazed at your covered pussy intently, tracing his fingers to the outline carefully making you gasp.
He had grown a chub in his pants and it throbbed badly. He wanted to see it bare — needed to. You noticed him staring, dropping the weight of your body on your elbows behind you and chuckling at his reaction.
“You can take it off, Van.”
He eyed you, hating the expression on your pretty face, so full of yourself for what you accomplished. He wasn't himself now, he wanted to see it, your cunt felt chubby against his fingers, your wetness sticking to his skin.
He tried to still his hands while taking your underwear off, but failed. He noticed that you had seen it and yanked your bottom forward into him, kissing you to cancel his annoyance. You pushed him closer to you, making him bench a little as you left his tongue to dominate yours. 
Vander was so affected by the act that he started to grind his bulge against your folds, hands groping all your body with his big calloused hands.
You got out the kiss, letting lose a little moan against his ears, which turned him on even more, hells, you had him cursing under his breath. 
“Fuck me, please!” You whimpered under your breath. Vander opened his eyes he didn't notice were closed to look at you, your pouting face and doe eyes. It was wrong. The whole situation was fucking  wrong, he can’t fuck you in the damn shop, in your dad’s counter, what the hell was he doing.
“You don't need to put it in, Van!” 
You wiggled your hips to try to get more friction from the rough material of his jeans that confined his borderline painful erection. Your bare pussy leaving dots of slickness on the fabric, he realized he said that out loud when you answered.
“Just rubbing is fine!” You whined closing your eyes when it grazed your clit just good. 
“Take it off, please? Please!” You begged.
He grabbed your hips firmly, Vander couldn't help but gaze at your pussy again. "Stop the fuss, princess– fuck" He panted into the air.
You opened your legs wider, "Van, if you just use it to jerk off it's fine, right?" You used your hand to open the inner lips wider to his hungry eyes.
"I-if you just don't put it inside it's going to be fine, just rub your cock right here" 
You gathered slick in your fingers and ran them up and down your folds, which made you hiss, grabbing your bottom lip with your teeth.
You were giving him a headache, but when he returned to himself he was already taking his hard cock out of his trousers with trembling hands. You pushed him closer with your legs and put your hands on his member for the first time, your fist not quite closing from the thickness. It was feverish hot and so heavy it wouldn't even stand, instead, hang low right next to your center.
You stroked him to the top lightly, pushing it into your pussy, so he could feel your entrance. Vander let out a trembling sigh when you started to guide his cock up and down your folds, coating him in your essence.
His eyes closed when you started to moan for him, he was bumping your clit continuously with that big head of his cock. It was a shade darker than his skin and so fucking big... You know you were the one to propose to him to just use your cunt to jerk off, but you wanted to feel it inside, stretching you.
"Fuck, fuck, you're so..." he opened his eyes to see you shyly smiling at him.
"Is it good for you too, Van?" You meowed when you felt him take hold of his member, lightly shoving your hand off. He applied more pressure on it, so it was rubbing harder against you. You were so fucking wet and hot against him, he could barely speak, instead, he let his mouth open panting slightly.
His other hand found itself holding your right thigh open from behind your knee, sure it would leave bruises.
"Wanna feel it inside, please?" You moaned, your hands reaching the neckline of your clothes, pulling them down to reveal your chest to him. You knew what you were doing to him, turning his brain to mush.
"Can't do it, you know I can't" he grunted closing his eyes not to look at you in fear, he knew once he saw your pouting face he would listen to your every word. 
You got that quickly, lifting one hand to his face, pulling him atop of you so you could give him a smooch on his lips and moan into his mouth as his tip grazed just right against your folds. His hands are now caging you, arms successfully holding his weight so as not to crush you.
"Open your eyes, want to see you" He tried to say no, but you caressed his face in such a loving way... He'll be damned, you will be his downfall for sure.
When he stood comfortable still kind of hovering over you, he opened his eyes, and what a sight was you, sparred all over Benzo’s counter, opened wide for him with your tits spilling from your dress, one of your hands guiding his dick down your slit to your entrance. Fuck, Vander could feel you spasm around nothing trying to pull him inside.
"Just the tip, Van." 
You sighed, giving him your best puppy eyes as your right hand on his face caressed his jaw, your thumb firing his mouth agape, gathering his spit and bringing your fingers to one of your nipples, pinching lightly.
"Wanna feel the stretch…” You moaned for him. “Don’t you wanna feel me too?”
His hips jerked upwards, his eyes wide as his gorgeous tip stretched your opening. Your toes curled and Vander tensed on top of you, holding himself back from pushing all his length inside.
"Fucking hell, you're so, f-fuck" his eyebrows were scrunched. You couldn't help but smile drunkenly, haha, the big scary Vander was at a loss of words over you, because of you.
The thought made you clench, his hands flying to your hips as to make you still. All Vander wanted was to empale you on his dick, make that sly smile on your face disappear and give space to a scream.
You put your hands between your bodies again, he was more relaxed and that was the perfect time for you to guide his head slowly in and out of your cunt, tightening your fist around him a little.
He was all grunts as he manhandled you alone, taking your hands off him and putting it to his heart, that you realized later that was racing. Vander's eyes were moving intently between your cute face and your cunt glistened in slick.
You brought your other hand to your mouth gathering spit and dragging it over your soft belly into your hooded clit.
Vander was losing rhythm, "Gonna cum, ahh" 
He was panting like a dog, trying to pull himself out of your grasp, but you used your legs to cage him.
"Please, let me out, princess, can't do it like that." 
He was falling apart, too pussydrunk to do anything about it. His tip still going in and out of you in shallow thrusts.
You said: "No, no! You gotta do it in me, inside! Wanna feel your cum filling me up.”
You were stubborn, grinning between meows and moans, it made him irritated, you were always the brat, fuck now he was angry.
He shoved his whole cock inside you and gave you what you wanted, cumming deep inside with a grunt as your nails dragged across his arms.
You whimpered while he took his time being milked by you, as he worked your clit at a fast pace.
You finally came on his cock doing a final clench that made him shudder.
He got down to earth eventually, removing himself from inside you, and admiring the mess he made of you. You giggled shyly, waking him up from his stupor. Suddenly his brows furrowed, he remembered he was mad now, at himself for being fooled, at you for charming him.
He stopped his seed from spilling on the counter, which was already a mess with your slick, pushing his thumb slowly inside.
"Happy now?! You got what you wanted, just know it won't happen again."
He was putting himself back in his pants with a scow on his face.
"Let's see how you manage, old man.”
Your legs were trembling when you tried to stand to gather your underwear. He had to support you with one hand, then helped you fix your dress.
He got away from you, trying to find the bottle of water Benzo got at the shop, filling a cup and giving it to you.
He gathered his documents long forgotten on a side table, getting ready to leave.
"Oh Van, no goodnight kiss?" You approached him slowly, damn he could see his cum running down your plush thighs.
"Maybe if you play it nice I’ll let you fuck me again, this time properly."
He passed one hand through his hair while closing his eyes.
"That ain't gonna happen, I already told you"
Was he scolding you right now?
"Then I gotta have to look for another man to do the job."
He gave you a look, his eyes dark. Tormenting him was always so much fun! He turned his back to you.
"I should probably go, before... Before someone sees me"
Vander felt so upset, but when he closed his eyes he saw you, your body under him, the thought making him bulge again.
He knew damn well it was going to be another time, honestly, he could not wait for it.
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Wrote this with my pussy btw. It was clapping in morse code, all I had to do was type it down.
Happy Christmas, guys!
The cute divider is from: @strangergraphics-archive
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cthulhus-curse · 2 days ago
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Extra Credit
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Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x Reader
Word Count: 6,020
Warnings: Age Difference, Alluded CSA, Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Smut, Teacher-Student Relationship | 18+ Minors DNI
A/N: Hopefully I scheduled this & the other fics correctly and not for the following year because I may no longer be around to fix it.
Summary: A series of snapshots of loving months alongside your professor which lead up to one of the most difficult decisions you’ve made in your life.
“Good morning, sunshine. Ready for another day of work?”
Although exhaustion ripped through your body, the sound of the woman’s voice made you smile. You learned to enjoy it through the past few weeks. Each day you woke up at what felt like the crack of dawn and went straight to work. Although it was right on campus, an office not too far from your dormitory, you weren’t used to being awake at such early hours. At least the pay was good and your boss was even better, you mused. 
“I can’t wait,” you replied flatly. Your boss, Professor Romanoff, came up to the desk you called a home ever since being hired. She held up two cups – one was her usual morning coffee and the other scalding hot chocolate topped off by a mountain of whipped cream. As always, she called you a child for picking that over anything caffeine-heavy. “Thanks for this.”
“No problem, sweetheart. Gotta keep my little assistant awake enough to get through the day,” Natasha chuckled. “Don’t worry, it won’t be heavy for you. We just have to get through grading some papers and then the rest of the shift is yours.”
The smirk remained plastered over your features as she handed you the hot chocolate before moving further in her office. Being the head of the English department at your university, Natasha got her privacy intact. It’s not like she was thrilled to work with her fellow professors anyway. 
“I heard there was a big party being hosted by your friends in the girl’s soccer team. I assume you’re planning on going?” Natasha’s tone was filled with curiosity, but never anger when she so much as alluded to your private life, specifically that having to do with one Wanda Maximoff. “I can let you go a few hours early if you need to get ready. Classes are done for the semester and you need to enjoy your college years. I’m sure Miss Maximoff would be happy to see you again. I know she means a lot to you.”
Ever since you had accepted the job as Natasha’s assistant, Wanda had given you the cold shoulder. You had spoken to her from time to time, but only when she came back to the dorm after days of being away, only to leave once again. At first you blame yourself for causing a rift in your relationship, if one could even call it that, but eventually you came to realize just how immature she was – taking a simple job offer did not mean your feelings for her changed in any way. 
“I actually haven’t seen her in awhile. She’s staying at Carol and Val’s place I think,” you shrugged while taking a sip of your drink. The way it burned its way onto your tongue and down your throat caused you to hum happily. 
“Oh? And how are you feeling about that?”
“I’m taking it pretty well. You know she’s not very fond of you and I think I pissed her off by agreeing to work for who she deems as ‘a fucking witch bitch’. It’s just childish and stupid,” you rolled your eyes at the mere idea of it. “I hate being someone’s second choice like that. She doesn’t even see how much I love her.”
Just like Wanda didn’t see you, you didn’t see Natasha. Your professor was crestfallen at the voices you threw at her. She hated seeing you in such pain, not being able to do anything about the mistreatment you received from your casual fling. The older woman cared for you, perhaps more than she led on – the mere image of seeing you in pain made bile rise up your throat before it was maintained in place. 
“Then it’s her loss. You deserve better than that, honey. You’re an amazing, beautiful, and smart woman. You don’t need to be sitting around waiting for someone to notice you. If she doesn’t like you the same way you like her, then it’s time to move on,” Natasha explained as she attempted to keep her own emotions at bay. She threw a sympathetic look your way even if you didn’t notice it. “Listen Y/N, I know we aren’t as close as you are with Miss Maximoff, but I care about you. You are by far my brightest student yet and I see so much potential in you. You don’t deserve to be thrown around like trash, only used when she gets bored with someone else. You deserve the world.”
“Yeah? And who’s gonna give me that?”
The ‘me’ went unspoken from Natasha. She simply sagged her head and stared down at the mountain of paperwork laying in her desk. It would be to no avail if she decided to work – with a brain oozing with thoughts of you, her focus disrupted. 
“How about we try something different today? We can work for a bit and then I can take you out for lunch. My treat,” Natasha said. “How does that sound? I just hate seeing you like this, sweetie.”
You thought about it for a second. There was something awfully safe about Natasha. As much as you wished to spend countless hours obsessing over Wanda, sometimes you found yourself humoring the idea of your professor. She was sweet, always protective as she huffed at the idea of you being hurt. At first you assumed it was some sort of motherly instinct, but after having caught yourself staring down her cleavage from time to time, the top buttons of her blouse always open, and she stared back with a smile, you knew something much more intimate lay beneath. 
“I’d like that,” you replied, suddenly drunk on Natasha’s presence as Wanda was left behind. 
“Good! Now time to work, hon. You don’t get paid to sit all day and look pretty,” the redhead chuckled at her own joke, suddenly feeling much more rejuvenated. “If you finish quickly, maybe we can grab some dessert as well.”
━━━━⊱⋆⊰━━━━
A shudder ran down your body as hands traveled across your back. Fingernails left heavy trails in their wake, surely to be worn with the utmost pride. You hummed, eyes closed while holding still, standing there naked as the day you were born. In the dusk of the room, you let yourself be the center of attention; the center of her attention. 
“What did she do this time?” Natasha asked from behind. Her mouth was quickly upon your upper back, kissing its way along your shoulder blades. Never did she lose her tenderness when touching you. “Tell me, darling girl. Use your words.”
You didn’t know when it had begun. One day you were at work standing in front of your boss’s desk before you became trapped against it. The first time Natasha kissed you was then and there. Neither could hold back the attraction you shared for one another. No longer did you prioritize Wanda as you allowed your professor to take you. 
“I found her sleeping with Kate. She was…she was laying in my bed, Nat. I saw them and just ran away. She fucked her in my bed!” You sobbed, but didn’t allow yourself to shed tears. Not long before you had promised yourself never to cry over Wanda again. “I didn’t know who else to go to. I just thought of you and ran.”
“Oh baby, I’m so sorry. I hate that she keeps hurting you,” Natasha mumbled back as she hugged you from behind. “Don’t you dare run away this late at night again. You know how much I worry about you. I’m just a phone call away, malyshka. Always.” 
“I’m sorry,” you responded before biting down on your lip. “I promise I’ll be good from now on. Your good girl, right?”
“Darling, you are always my good girl.”
Natasha motioned you to get on the bed, your head against a pillow as your ass remained up in the air. She allowed her hands to roam over your backside, smirking as a hand went down against a cheek. It was only a soft hit. Never did Natasha wish to inflict any horrid pain over you. As her eyes noticed the faint bruises Wanda left along your skin, she huffed. 
The redhead stood over you. She carried a dildo between her legs that was attached to a harness. Similar to you, she was fully nude minus for the red briefs she wore. Strong arms reeking with muscles held you close. As she inched the toy between your legs, you let out a loud moan. 
“I don’t like how she hurts you. I know you like it, Y/N, but she leaves you looking like a piece of meat. Does she even take care of your wounds, baby? Or does she leave you like that after hitting you until you’re crying out for her to stop?” Natasha questioned, already knowing what the answer was. Ever since first seeing your body, she was the one who took care of you as a surrogate for Wanda. “I know I can’t control what you do, but honey, this isn’t right. I can’t stand seeing you like this.”
Rather than vocalize your response, you hid your face against the pillow. Natasha slid inside you softly, allowing the dildo to fill you with ease. There was a grunt that you basked upon – it was low and throaty filled with your professor’s longing desire. She used all her force to drag you into a makeshift sitting position. From then on, Natasha allowed herself to, only gently, give you the pleasure Wanda failed to gift you with. 
“I want more,” you begged, eyes rolled to the back of your head the further Nat moved inside of you. Movements were languid and sloppy. All the older woman focused on was your own pleasure, not speed or roughness. Unlike Wanda, she took her time getting to know exactly what to do and how to touch you. “Please, mommy, I need more!”
“Whatever you want, my little angel.”
Natasha did not spend time rummaging through the newfound honorific. She beamed at it, but didn’t comment on anything. Instead, she thrust her hips forth fucking you with love that Wanda never gave you. Kisses were spread all across your back. Each grunt, each little noise she made mixed with your own, made you feel in heaven. 
Hands gripped your breasts from behind. They squeezed the mounds tightly, rolling erect nipples through the fingers. As Natasha pumped the strap-on in you, your cunt dripping with juices while velvety walls hugged her tight, she brought a hand down your body. Fingertips pressed against your clit and began teasing it, flicking the bud as you screamed loudly – surely her neighbors would hear. 
“You’re doing so well for me, Y/N. Just look at how you’re taking my cock. My pretty, little girl,” Natasha moaned when hugging you tight. She nuzzled her face against your shoulder before nipping your skin. There were various hickeys left upon you, signs for Wanda to see if you ever dared return to her. Natasha knew you weren’t hers, but each second she spent with you made her crave you even more. “I bet she can’t fuck you like this, can she? That little…she can’t make you feel this good. Only I can make it better. I’m the only one that will ever keep you safe and you know this.”
When you finally came, Natasha was there to keep you close. She remained frozen in place as your orgasm shot through your body. Not even a second passed before she inched you on the bed, allowing you to rest upon the soft mattress with the dildo still inside you. 
“I never want to see you hurt again. If she ever does this to you, if you end up going back, I want you to call me when you need me. I never break a promise,” Natahsa muttered as she placed a kiss over the back of your head. “I’ll always keep you safe.”
From then on, you found yourself hesitating each time you merely humored the idea of going back to Wanda. Even if you told yourself that the relationship with Natasha was nothing more than platonic, you questioned the validity of such a statement. Every second you spend with her, you fall further for your professor. 
━━━━⊱⋆⊰━━━━
“Tell me about your family.”
The two of you had escaped the cruel Bostonian summer filled with never-ending traffic and burning skyscrapers. It was the dead-center of the season and the entire city was plagued by a mix of potential commuters for the various academic institutions or those who, for some reason, decided for it to be her vacation destination.
Natasha had taken you away to a small town across the state. It was remote, small enough so that the two of you could enjoy your life in public without the student body of the university to find you. All you had done was pack all the bags you could muster for the weekend getaway. It was peace which became well-deserved. 
You weren’t much of a fan of them, but Nat had always spoken highly of the times she took her sister to pick out peaches ever since she first learned how to drive. The two of them would escape into an orchard in the depths of Ohio and come out with their hands full with fruits. The mere memory she shared with you was enough to get you to agree to her plans. 
“Well, there’s really not much to talk about. I was adopted by Melina and Alexei,” Natasha began as though it was the most casual thing in the world to refer to her parents by their given names. “I have a sister, also adopted, named Yelena. She’s the light of my life. A bit of an asshole I must say, but she’s the one I care about most.”
“Yelena Belova? That’s your sister?” You asked with furrowed eyebrows; it was a name similar to that of a member of Wanda’s team. 
“Yes. I realize she’s friends with Miss Maximoff,” Natasha replied with apparent dismay. “As hard as I’ve tried to keep her away from that girl, the two are almost inseparable. I trust her enough to not do anything overly stupid though. Lena has always been a bit of a firecracker.”
The two of you walked hand in hand along the orchard. There was not a label to whatever you had yet, but it didn’t care. Natasha was clear when she said she would never pressure you into it. Instead, you allowed yourself to be a free agent who, at times, found yourself wishing to have something more with your professor. 
Eyes roamed over the woman’s body. Usually you saw her in professional clothes or the occasional nightgown when you stayed over at her place, but never with a pair of shorts and a loose camisole. There were sunglasses shielding Natasha’s viridescent eyes from the sun, but you had looked into them for long enough to memorize their beauty. 
You noticed how she covered her body from time to time, hands over her thighs, cowering away from the nonexistent public that dared gawk in her general direction. It hurt to see. She was the perfect image of beauty to you, but a disgusting void to herself. 
There were rare moments in which Natasha allowed you to touch her. She was a fan of studying each and every one of your favorite sweet spots, running hands across your skin before making you giggle under the drunkenness of arousal. The few times you had placed your palms upon her frame you did so in a tender manner – Nat was a porcelain doll under your touch who could break at any seconds. It merely lasted a few seconds before she pushed you off and rushed to apologize for acting out, only for you to shoot her a warm smirk and tell her there was nothing wrong with that. 
Shaking your head, you brought yourself back to the present and carried on. 
“Yeah, your sister’s always been nice to me though. She’s not as close with Wanda if that makes you feel better. I’ve mostly seen her chasing around that Kate girl. Maybe it’s an underclassmen thing,” you shrugged. “What about your parents?”
There was a pregnant pause, clear hesitation, before Natasha continued.
“Well, I never met my biological family nor did I care about seeking them out. My mom has always been amazing,” Natasha stopped for a second, her hands gliding across the peaches that she carefully eyed. “My father…not so much.”
“Why do you refer to her as mom and him as father?” came your question before you could help yourself.
It was clear her demeanor had changed. Natasha stood with her back straight, hands clasped in front of her as a means to shield herself. She only stared forth into nothingness. Her body was with you in the orchard while her mind went back to when she was a child – to when she was alone with him. 
“It makes it less personal,” she finally answered. “It’s also easier than calling him ‘the man whose wife wanted to adopt two kids he never wanted’ and then turned my childhood to shit. I grew up way too fast because of that…that durak!”
The yelp she let out was fueled with emotions you had yet to see. Natasha was rarely angry, let alone emotionally vulnerable to let you peek through her walls. Her body sagged after fighting so long being tense. You could see tears rushing down her face even with sunglasses that covered them, but knew not to make a comment.
“Nat, has he ever…?”
You didn’t want to humor such a thing. Even then, you already knew the answer given her body language and unspoken words. While you fought with the idea of potentially driving to her father’s house and beating him to a pulp, Natasha found herself glad it had been her over Yelena. If something were to happen to her sister, she would never forgive herself. Each time he came at night, the woman sacrificed herself. It was a small price to pay for her beloved sibling’s safety. 
“I don’t want to talk about it, baby,” Natasha said with a cracked voice, turning the other way to move further into the orchard. You gave her space knowing that whenever she felt comfortable enough to talk, she would. All you could do was follow along as the professor whispered again. “I’m sorry.”
But behind her broken tone, deep down, you could hear a younger Nat’s faint cry of ‘yes’. 
━━━━⊱⋆⊰━━━━
There were moments in which exhaustion overtook you during long tedious days. You could barely move a muscle and still feel as though life had been sucked out of you. Most of your summer was spent chasing around Natasha, who you remained working for throughout the following months with little to no workload. Being around the woman, doing mere iced coffee runs and chatting without a care in the world while in the office made you feel free for once in a lifetime – for the first time since you met Wanda, she was an afterthought. 
Natasha was quick to jump in and take care of you through those moments. She always acted out in small, loving ways when paying for your food, giving you rides, or merely holding your hand as the two of you walked into your next adventure. Her desperation to hold you in her arms and promise you all would be well was intense. There was love radiating from her a mile away which you were far too shortsighted to see. 
“Tell me what you need, malyshka. Come on, little darling, use your words.”
After a particularly difficult day, you found yourself safe in Natasha’s lap. There had been no overexertion of your being during that day. It had mostly been relaxing as you worked alongside your professor on a Friday, but when you received a call from Wanda midday, the woman asking you to meet up, you merely froze and broke down in the office – your ‘friend’ only reached out when she needed something from you and it had been nearly a month since you last spoke amicably. After you only hummed as a reply and ended the call, Natasha was there to break your fall. 
“Mommy’s here for you. I know today has been a really difficult day and that you’ve felt really stressed, but I don’t want you focusing on those icky thoughts. I just wish she didn’t hurt you like this,” came the older woman’s whisper as she pulled you close. The two of you had rushed out of the office even hours before Natasha liked calling it quits. Even as behind as she was with her future lesson planning, she still prioritized you before anything else. “Use your words, detka. Tell mommy how she can help.”
“I don’t even want to think,” you flatly mumbled with tears threatening to fall down your eyes. Hands gripped the professor’s clothes while your forehead lay frozen in her shoulder. With arms wrapped around your body you finally felt safe. “Please help me forget, Nat. I never want to think about her again. I just-” your words were cut short by a short while your voice was left cracked. 
“Shh it’s alright, my darling girl. Mommy’s here to make it all better.”
While holding you tight, Natasha allowed a hand to slip down your body. It snuck to your lap then between your legs. No teasing was found – she knew you how overwhelmed you were and was ready to give you whatever you wished for without question. When naked fingers went past the waistline of your sweats and underwear, landing upon your already throbbing sex, you couldn’t hold back a throaty moan. 
You quickly realized Natasha wanted to separate herself from the man who agreed to adopt her. He was rough, violent, and torturous much like how she saw Wanda, whereas your professor never failed to bring a smile to your face even as she smacked your backside harshly — she always soothed the skin with the palm of her hand before carrying on. She wanted, no, needed to break away from his grasp over her mind. Otherwise she’d end up as a battered slave of his once again. 
Fingertips brushed against your clit then studied the entirety of your slit while coating themselves in your everlasting slick. Natasha peppered your wet cheeks, filled with desolate tears, with kisses. She mumbled only the sweetest words while easing herself in you. You cried out about your sorrows, about Wanda’s mistreatment over you, while the older woman simply sat there and held you through it. 
“You’re the most beautiful girl I’ve ever had the pleasure of meeting. Anyone who dares make you feel this bad is an idiot. Y/N, my love, you deserve the world,” Natasha said lovingly. She nuzzled her face against your own, foreheads pressed together with fingers knuckle-deep inside your cunt. You couldn’t even muster the enthusiasm to grind on them. Instead, you remained shaking as Natasha made it all better. “You never let yourself be treated like that by anyone, alright? Whether it’s Miss Maximoff or me, or anyone else. My darling angel should be treated as the princess she is. You’re one of a kind, honey, a perfect little bear. I never want you to forget just how valuable your existence is.”
Tears of joy were mixed with your gloomy ones. There were cries of pleasure and internal pain that Natasha never stopped supporting you through. She allowed her lips to touch down upon your own. With your orgasm approaching soon and her tender care, you were elated. 
“My sweet baby,” came Natasha’s hushed whisper. She made you come, your back arching while fingernails dug deep into the redhead’s outfit. There was a loud moan, though distant, that boomed across the room. Even as you fell apart, strong arms held you in place. Such a wondrous creature such as yourself, according to your boss, deserved to see the stars. “You did such a good job for mommy. Always my perfect girl,” she breathed out with fingers still deep inside you. “All mine.”
You swore there was a muttered ‘I love you’ thrown somewhere, but with the mix of mental and physical exhaustion raining down upon your body, you merely shrugged your shoulders and fell limp against Natasha. Although you wouldn’t admit it, your heart longed to say the words back – out of everyone in your life, you never expected to fall into the depths of love with your professor. 
━━━━⊱⋆⊰━━━━
“I don’t know why you like this show so much. It’s just senseless killing and at the end they solve everything and go home.”
Although it was supposed to be a relaxing weekend towards the start of the Fall semester, you found the mind boggling statement to fill you with feigned rage. Even as classes began, the arrangement between you and the professor carried on. You still worked for her even if there were no classes in said semester you took with you. As disappointing as that was, you began seeing more of Natasha regardless in more ways than one. 
The two of you were sitting on the couch late one Friday night. You were exhausted with your course load and Natasha cursed off the new freshmen she had to teach; they always pretended to still be in high school. A bowl of popcorn was nestled between your legs. While you watched Criminal Minds, Natasha settled for insulting it. 
“It’s fun, Romanoff. Entertaining at the very least.” you shot back with a knowing smirk. You had been the one to introduce her to various shows. Who would’ve thought that the great Professor Romanoff was living underneath a rock her whole life? 
“Wow I’ve been demoted from mommy to Romanoff. That’s sad,” Natasha laughed before grabbing a handful of popcorn. “Who’s your favorite character?”
“Probably Rossi,” came your shrug. “He’s the guy with the beard.”
“Really?” At the surprised tone your lover let out, you feigned offense. “I thought you’d like one of the girls. What about that brunette with the bangs?”
“Oh, Emily left for the Interpol. I would like JJ, but I don’t know. There’s just something cool about Rossi in this season.”
The two of you remained silent for a few seconds. It wasn't awkward, but then again, nothing was with Natasha by your side. Even if you slipped and fell in front of her, you wouldn’t feel embarrassed. The woman never judged you, instead supporting your every decision while also guiding you through life. You felt comfortable enough with her to be yourself. At times it felt as though it was you and Nat against the world. 
“Maybe you just have daddy issues,” Natasha casually offered. Moment passed before the two of you burst out laughing. Tears sprinkled in your eyes while your breath left your body. With the amusement that basked in the room, you both were giggling messes. 
“Hey!” you huffed when gaining some of your composure back and lightly slapping Natasha’s shoulder. “We both have daddy issues.”
“Fine, but I have more than you. Mostly because I’ve never actually met my real dad. Maybe he’s an asshole like Alexei,” Natasha giggled. She never failed to look radiant as ever, especially when laughing and seemingly worry-free. You had to do several double takes because the beauty that exuded from your professor was far too enthralling to break away from. As the laughter died down and you were left holding one another, her head on your shoulder while you leaned back against the couch, she spoke. “I want you to be my girlfriend, Y/N.” 
You had both agreed to keep things unofficial and yet there was that unmistakable skip of a beat your heart underwent when Natasha spoke her words. Teeth gnawed at your bottom lip nervously. There were striking green eyes which made it difficult for you to ignore the pegged comment. While your heart longed you to reply with a ‘yes’, to finally be Natasha’s forever, your mouth reacted differently. 
For the rest of the evening the two of you sat by and finished watching the show. Natasha was silent as she ghosted over her house, leaving you alone in the living room before hiding out in her bedroom. It was the first night in months that you slept in the guest room by yourself. And to your dismay, you went to sleep listening to Natasha’s quiet sobs that escaped the privacy of her bedroom. You had felt bad for Wanda when she got sad about you seeing your professor casually, but listening to the redhead’s woes was synonymous with your heart being squeezed to death. 
━━━━⊱⋆⊰━━━━
It was October when you fell in love. 
You returned to your dorm room days later behind the guise of assuming Natasha wished for you to be far away. She had barely spoken a word to you at work. Most of the time she sat by her desk with sagged shoulders, glasses perched at the edge of her nose, and glossy eyes hiding behind the frames. You desperately wished to say something, but when Wanda sweeped back into your life, the guilt ate at you until nothing was left behind. 
The Fall semester quickly rolled by. You were at the end of the month and still couldn’t sleep without seeing Natasha’s face tainted in your mind. At times when Wanda lay above you, hips thrusting with straps wrapped around them and letting out low grunts, you closed your eyes and imagined it was the older woman. The memories of her doing the same were soaked with humiliation. You had broken her heart, you knew. Never would you dare forgive yourself for having caused so much pain upon the frail, angelic woman. 
“I hate her so much,” Wanda had grumbled when you walked through campus hand-in-hand passing by a certain professor whose sight was solemnly trained on the floor. Your hand was squeezed as your eyes drifted to Natasha. As much as she seemingly hated you, all you wanted to do was run up to her, wrap her in your arms, and bed for forgiveness. Even if it would take ages, she was worth it. “Fucking bitch.”
Perhaps it was Wanda’s comment or the fact that you finally gained enough confidence through your depressive episode to take action, but that night you found yourself standing in front of Natasha’s house. Your roommate was long forgotten and for the first time in your life, you couldn’t care less about who she was fucking. All that mattered was the woman you, without admitting it, had fallen for. 
There was a desperate knock upon the hardwood door. There was furious rain which fell down upon your body. That along with the cool breeze of the night made you freeze in place. Still, you felt as though you deserved it. Even then, you’d do whatever it took for Natasha. 
“It’s 10pm on a Wednesday, Y/N. Someone better be dying,” were the first words Natasha spoke to you once the door swung open in a low grumbled voice you knew to be from when she awoke. “To what do I owe the displeasure? Did you come here to tell me how great Miss Maximoff is compared to-”
You cut her off by practically tackling Natasha into the house. Even if your body was dripping with the tears of the sky, you clung to the woman as though your life depended on it. She was clearly taken aback and yet never moved away. Instead her arms were left unmoving as you embraced her. That was good enough for you, you assumed. 
Putting your heart on the line has never been easy. You were the person who shoved her emotions so deep down that you somehow told yourself Wanda was the one for you. Although she hurt you so much, you still remained by her side. It wasn’t difficult to assume Natasha had felt something similar when you rejected her. She had spent countless months giving you the utmost love and never daring to ask for anything in return. You were always protected by her mere presence until one day you decided to throw it all away. Going to her house, you were without hope of being taken back. There was slight hesitation reeking in your chest, but as soon as you saw your former lover, you swore you fell for her once again – she would forever be worth it. 
“I’m the world’s biggest fucking idiot and I admit it. I should’ve said yes to you,” you began. Life had been tedious without Natasha even if only for a few weeks. You hated how only a cold slap in the face in the shape of one Wanda Maximoff could awaken you from such a dismal nightmare. “I hurt you so badly and I never, ever expect for you to take me back. I was an asshole. A svo-lach' if you will,” you could practically feel Natasha’s slight smirk at the mention of a Russian word she had taught you. “I miss you and I don’t think I can do this without you. It’s probably stupid since we weren’t with each other for ages. It wasn’t official and yet I can’t stop thinking about you. I want you to be my girlfriend. It’s always been you, Nat and it always will be.”
No words were spoken as the door was locked and you were dragged to the bedroom. Even if dripping with water, Natasha helped undress you. She threw you against the bed, viridescent eyes twinkling under the dead of the night before taking her rightful position over your body. There was not an area of your freezing body that she didn’t kiss her way through as sudden warmth radiated from her skin and onto yours. 
When you first kissed her after weeks of being away, you swore there were fireworks going off. Never had kissing Wanda felt even remotely good or similar. You were enthralled by the way Natasha was seemingly everywhere. Her hands drifted up your body before taking your breasts into her palms and squeezing them, nipples rolling through her fingers before being pinched – she did always have an adorable fixation on your chest. There was a sense of longing within her. The two of you hadn’t been together for far too long. During the rest of the night, you explored what was missed, holding one another as cries of pleasure were let out. 
Positions were switched from time to time. Natasha would be on top before you pushed her against the mattress and had your head disappear between her legs. There was nothing to be said. You two communicated through sweet and rough touches, connecting as one without the need for words. There was a moment when you made her squirt, legs shaking as your fingers were dug deep inside her cunt. Natasha was left wide-eyed and suddenly droopy while you lapped at the mess – even when a spent mess, she was the most beautiful woman in the universe. 
When neither of you could keep going it was already the early hours of the morning. Your bodies were sore and marked with the reddened tracks of fingernails. It was the first time in ages that you finally felt as though you belonged. Natasha was your person, she was safe, and she was home. It was then that you, while fingers trailed across the back of the woman’s hand, decided never to dare leave her again. 
“I love you,” she muttered once you were breathing raggedly, laying back on the bed with bodies intertwined and hearts aligned. You felt yourself crawl out of your skin, frowning as the words were spoken. Without even daring to turn around, you went to grab Natasha’s hand. When squeezing it, you gave her your response. 
You couldn’t say it out loud, but she knew then you loved her too.
190 notes · View notes
morgue-friends · 18 hours ago
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"A Maiden's Token" | Count Orlok x Female! Reader
Warnings: dub-con, count orlok is his own warning, blood kink, penis in vagina sex, sexual tension, creampie, oral (f receiving), death is mentioned, no aftercare, reader probably has stock-holm syndrome.
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Fourteen days, that's how long you've been here. That's how long you've been left on your own every daybreak and then expected to entertain death itself every evening. As the sunset on the snowy horizon, you made your way back into the castle, dragging your tattered dress by what remained left of it through the snow. Upon entry, you were shocked to see that the fireplace was still lit. Occasionally, it would flicker out during sunset as if the castle consciously knew a force of darkness would be awakening.
With a sigh, you lifted your dress and dropped down by the fireplace suddenly out of breath. Maybe it was the consistent blood loss or the freezing temperatures of the European mountains that you were succumbing to. As far as you knew, he hadn't given you any reason to believe that you'd have an extended stay at the castle. At the end of the day, your chances of reaching the next morning relied solely on the temperament of a man. Your mother had taught you well enough about men to know that when they get bored, they tend to move on.
You felt the presence of tears threatening to depart from your eyes as you thought of your poor mother. She must be so worried and heartbroken. Ever since the two of you arrived in Europe after leaving America, her overprotectiveness of you has grown enormously. When you told her of a Count from a neighboring country requesting your services for painting a self-portrait of him within his own castle, she warned you against going and you decided to shelve away her concerns as mere fairytales. You gripped the silver locket necklace hanging around your neck for security and sighed. Your mother had gifted you this locket on your most recent birthday, and holding it helped you think of all your fondest memories with her.
Now, here you sit, sleep deprived and undernourished. He left you only bread, some grapes, wine, and a bucket of water. You were thankful for the water as you refused to be inebriated in your current situation. It was almost shocking to see he had the decency to have the water refilled each day, but you knew it was only because he'd hate to let his food source run dry.
Suddenly, you were startled when you heard the pouring of wine into a goblet behind you. You hadn't even heard him ascend up the stairs of the castle, and yet there he was in his full glory at the head of the dining table. Now, whether he did ascend the stairs and walk right past you or he simply just appeared at the table was something only god himself would know.
"You have been crying." The Count's thick accent hung heavy in the air, his voice sending a rippling wave of goosebumps over your skin. The tone of his voice was accusatory and not at all sympathetic. Even with English clearly not being his first language, you could hear his overwhelming disappointment. Over the two weeks he's kept you here his English had somewhat improved either by hearing you speak it whether you were asking to excuse yourself to find somewhere to use the bathroom in the empty bucket he gave you. Or from your begging and pleading for him to just let you go home.
Your cold hands desperately wiped the tears from your eyes, and you stood to your feet. He watched you approach the elegant dining table, and you took your seat as far as you could away from him. It was painfully obvious that this night would go just about the same as every other night. You two would intensely stare at eachother while you'd ate your bread for dinner, he'd make you get up and walk to the guest bedroom where he'd make you strip naked and feed from you and then you'd pass out from the pain and awake in the morning to the Count missing and nowhere to be found.
It wasn't even like he needed to feed from you. From your understanding, as he explained it, he'd go into the nearby village and 'have his fill' after he had siphoned a small amount from you. It made you feel like some kind of appetizer or twisted desert for him to be keeping you alive this long. Even with his figure shrouded in darkness, you could still tell by his posture that he was growing impatient with waiting for you to finish your 'dinner'. It was almost like the flickering flame of every candle avoided his very figure as if the fire itself was scared of this entity.
When you finally finished, you stood up from the table and waited till he rose from his seat before you allowed him to lead you to the guest room. You had gotten so used to his grotesque heavy breathing that when he suddenly stopped, the silence was deafening.
"You are crying again." At least when he said it this time, he sounded somewhat amused. It was like he knew that you've accepted your fate and that there wasn't anything you or god could do about it. The door to the guest room opened slowly without him having to touch the handle, and you stepped inside, fingers already loosening the ties of your corseted dress. "Forgive my tears, my Lord." You cringed at the title you gave him. Of course, an entity this dark would be so egotistical to have you address him as a Lordship. You had wondered if this kind of evil was something that would come from inside someone or from the beyond.
"Why would I need to forgive such fragility? You are a human girl. It is in your nature to be weak and fragile." A vein could have popped in your forehead, and you wouldn't have even known it. His words made you seethe and boil with anger, you had to bite your tongue so hard not to say anything that would get him to eviscerate you on the spot.
"Ah, there she is, my cochetă, my minx, be angry so that all your blood may flow freely." Your body winced at the nickname he gave you. He had called you it frequently rather than your real name. Even when you had unknowingly signed away yourself to him in a contract, he addressed you only by 'cochetă' which he explained was romanian for Minx since you weren't at all fluent with the language yet. You dropped your dress and undergarments off in a chair away from that bed so that you may spare it from any more trauma. After taking your seat on the bed, you draped the blood-stained blanket over your shoulders in an attempt at making you feel like you haven't soiled your modesty.
"I have seen all you have to offer. You will not hide from my eyes." With in an instant, you removed the blanket, not from your own will but because he compelled you to do so. Another tear fell down the side of your face, and this one he wiped away with the side of one of his long pointed nails. Your head fell back onto the mattress, and the Count leaned over you and dropped his face to below your exposed left breast. His breath against your skin felt like ice, and you shut your eyes in order to brace for the pain that never came.
Instead of the feeling of two fanged teeth penetrating your heart, you felt the knuckle of one of his fingers brush against your clit and your back arched. Your eyes widened, and you sat up to meet his stare. There he stood, completely unafflicted by your reaction. In fact, it was almost as if you were the one who did something wrong. Impulsively, a heat pooled in your lower abdomen, it's warmth radiating down your legs. You squeezed your eyes shut in hopes to catch your breath and calm yourself down. What he did to you was only causing a natural response from your body, and you had no control over such responses.
Nonetheless, you still felt the urge to mentally shame yourself for being a such sinful whore who's body responds like that to the touch of something - someone so heinous. It was almost as if the devil himself had cursed you with such blasphemy with the way your nipples hardened to a peak and your thighs squeezed together, trying to prevent you losing yourself to sin any further.
You didn't even open your eyes back up when you felt his cold hand grab a hold of one of your thighs, you were then pulled further down the mattress closer to the edge of the bed and to him. A hand that was so cold that it felt like it was devoid of any life and any warmth worked it way up your chest and grabbed one of your breasts. You bit your lip to hold back a gasp when the peak of your nipple was rubbed back and forth by his thumb. It wasn't until you felt the contact of his mouth around one of your nipples that your eyes shot wide open.
You looked down to see that he had your left breast peaked in his mouth while he suckled on your nipple. Your body betrayed you once again, and that heat you were feeling at your core seemed to grow much hotter. A swipe of his cold tongue against your nipple made you look down again, and you got a good look at the head of the man doing this to you. He had since discarded his hat in the dining room, and now you have a much closer look at the spirit you were dealing with. The back of his head was rotten and decayed even under the several thin tufts of brown hair on his head. It felt like you were looking at a corpse of a man that should have been locked far away in a coffin in the depths of hell.
You weren't even paying attention when a hand parted your thighs and brought attention back to your clit, he pulled back the hood and started rubbing slow deliberate circles around it, being mindful of his claws. He switched to your right breast, and at this point, there was no use controlling your gasps and whimpers anymore. He was so gentle with you. Maybe this was foreshadowing that tonight would be the night he'd finally get rid of you, and this was just him rubbing salt in the wounds and making the evening last as long as possible. He'd never touched your nether regions before, but when he fed from the blood of your heart, he'd often rub his hands around your waist as if he was mockingly consoling you the way a lover would.
The hairs of his thick mustache tickled your nipple and you weren't ready for when he dragged downward a long lick from your breast, to over your stomach and then finally stopping at the mound between your legs. You exhaled deeply when he resumed and dragged his blackened tongue down your slit, getting a taste of your wetness in his mouth. This wasn't something you should be enjoying, just the symphony of approving noises that left your lips made you feel appalled with yourself. It wasn't until you felt his lips lock around your clit that you became heavy lidded and utterly defeated.
You settled with the idea that he's being so cautious with you because he's going to make you reap what you sowed when it was time for him to experience his own pleasure. And regardless of how good he made you feel in this very moment, you still hated him. He tricked and imprisoned you in this hellish imitation of a castle. He left you alone and unattended during the day, allowing a pack of wolves to ensure you never take your leave. It was because of him that your mother was a several weeks journey away, worried sick about you, and you weren't even sure if you'd ever see her again.
You were on the verge of crying again until he rose to his feet, his figure demanding your full attention. His clawed hands fiddled with the buttons of his trousers, and your breath hitched. The hefty fur cape he wore would frequently would drape over his frame and seculde him in almost total darkness. You never knew what his daily wear looked like since he seemed content in hiding in the shadows of your vision only to reveal slightly more of himself to you when he fed from your body. What came to your vision when he glanced back at you was the erect bulbous head of his cock. It was engorged and jutted upward toward the ceiling as if it demanded your gaze on it.
He crept closer to you, staring intensely as if trying to gauge your state of mind, trying to see whether you were going to fight or flee. Instead, you just allowed your head to fall back onto the mattress. It was pointless to do either of those, and deep down in the darker realms of your subconscious, this behavior from him was welcomed. When the head of his thick member prodded at your entrance, your breath hitched, and you closed your eyes tightly.
Instead of thrusting inside, he thrusted his shaft upward, dragging it along your slit to coat himself in your wetness. When the shaft slid up against your clit you couldn't help but mewl out, still feeling that knot in your lower belly that was just waiting to be undone. When he finally seized the moment to thrust inside you, your eyes shot open, burning and stinging with tears. The Count let out what sounded like an inhuman hiss as his length seeped into your heat, inch by inch. The stretch was almost unbearable. It felt like you were being split right down the middle into two halves of yourself, and you weren't sure what half you pitied more. Your mouth opened to make a noise, but nothing came out. Such an intrusion of this nature left your throat speechless and strained. He pulled his hips back, and a clawed hand shot up to your face and held you in place upon his re-entry.
Those pointed nails of his were so sharp it felt like you had needles digging into your skin. Beads of red came into your vision dripping down your face from how much pressure those thick claws of his put into your flesh. When you tried to snatch your face away from his hand, he only pulled out and thrust into you more harshly. The squelching noise your cunt made around his length felt nothing short of sinful. To your disbelief, you learned he still had more of his shaft left to give you when he pushed himself further inward to the hilt. The thick head of his cock struck your cervix like hammer and a painful cramping sensation followed behind it. He hummed a noise of satisfaction as if he was he was impressed you were able to take all of him to the hilt.
Your breasts bounced on your chest when he roughly pulled out entirely only to shove himself back in. You gave a whine in response, and it was only then that he had seemingly guaged a fine line of pleasure and pain for you. Adjusting himself, he started up a pace of feverent rutting that made your legs tremble pitifully around his waist. The pressure of his hand on your face left when he leaned over to get a taste of the clotted blood that dotted across your forehead. His body was so much larger than your own that he had to contort himself over you to be able to taste the crimson he created and be able to continue his rutting.
The frequent movement of your body from the impact of his hips against yours was beginning to loosen that knot you felt in your belly. Your moans grew louder, and so did the beating of your heart against your rib cage. Inducing this creature to feed from you because your heart enticed him was the last thing you needed right now. The pace of his thrusts harshened, and so did the primal look he had in his eyes. Having him over you and staring at you like this, as if he were a lion and you were a weak gazelle soon to be eaten. For such an entity of darkness, he had such expressive eyes, sometimes they were so black you could see your reflection. Sometimes, they were so white and cloudy, you'd wonder where he had come from, heaven, hell, or neither.
"Please..." You weren't quite sure what you were begging for, but in your heart, it felt like it was for release. Release from the built-up pressure in your belly, release from the castle, or even release from life itself. Your hand reached up, and you cupped the flesh of his face. His skin was so cold, so rotten, and yet there was a feeling of life as if there was perhaps a soul present, but you knew better. There wasn't any life within him, as he was death itself. There was no soul within him, as he claimed the souls of others.
The closer his body, his cock, brought you to this peak of of pleasure that you pleaded for, the wider the smile grew on your face. A smile that didn't go unnoticed as his lips claimed the skin of your neck in what felt like possessive kisses. Perhaps this union of flesh solidified the extent of your stay at the castle through your own submission and your yield to the power he had over you. Those kisses trailed up to your own lips, and you tasted death from his mouth to yours. You tasted your own blood from him, and you tasted his hatred and his darkness, and yet you no longer had fear for it. With a painful clench of your walls, you came undone, your release washing over you in thick waves.
The spasming, clenching, and squeezing of your canal made the already deep and ragged breaths he took erratic, as did his rutting a few quick snaps of his hips and you felt a spurt of cold fluid inside you. The chill of it rose up your spine as it felt as if death itself had released into you. A deep animalistic growl vibrated off of the stone walls around you and bounced around in your skull. When he removed himself from you, you felt the remainder of his spent coat your inner thighs.
You looked away as you sat up on your own elbows, trying to balance yourself, and when you looked up, expecting to meet the eyes of a starving beast, you were met with an empty room. He had left you, spared you even. You couldn't imagine the type of carnage and havoc he'd wreak upon those villagers tonight. Reaching up to clutch your necklace for security and your hands found nothing but skin. He was gone and had taken your necklace with him. He took it as if you had bestowed upon him the honor of having a maiden's token.
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madschiavelique · 2 days ago
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Hello, I don't have any idea for younger inexperienced halsin, but I have something that might interest you.
Imagine this, experienced Halsin x Inexperienced tav. But tav is so innocent, wants to do so well, but halsin has to control himself. Thus, halsin is the one being unknowingly (for tav) teased and flustered as he has to control himself, and not to frighten tav.
That's it. Flustered halsin.
─ . 𝜗𝜚‧ pairing : halsin x inexperienced!reader
─ . 𝜗𝜚‧ content warning : explicit, smut, more of a ramble than a specific scenario, feels more like headcanons even, fem!reader, no use of y/n
─ . 𝜗𝜚‧ words : 585
─ . 𝜗𝜚‧ author's note : omg anon yES!!! sorry it took me so long but arcane is back on my mind and i just had to get down to writing for viktor bbg
( not proofread, english is not my first language ☆)
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Halsin had had many adventures over the centuries. He had experimented with a variety of ages, no doubt travelled the length and breadth of positions that could be taken, and tasted the pleasures of many different races.
And yet, despite all that, it was as if you had shaken every one of his foundations.
You never ceased to surprise him, you were so clinging to this idea of wanting to do the right thing that you were nervous at the drop of a hat. Halsin had reassured you extensively that he would never, ever do anything you didn't want him to do.
But you were curious, and he was pretty sure on Silvanus himself that your cuteness would be his undoing.
You were shy in the kisses you offered him without his having initiated them, watching him with gentle eyes as your gaze drifted to his lips and he had to do everything in his power not to tear every layer of clothing covering you.
There was an innocence and hesitation in the way you took his hand, touched him, said his name that drove him crazy.
The other night, when you were all gathered around the campfire, chatting about everything and nothing as usual at the end of the day, you were sitting on his lap. You laughed and listened to Gale's story that Astarion kept interjecting. You whispered in Halsin's ear a remark about the story that you didn't dare say out loud, and the simple sensation of your breath and your voice so low and close to his ear was enough to make him almost lose his composure.
And when you slept together when the nights were too cold and you embraced him during your pre-sleep chats, your fingers tracing affectionate caresses down his back, Halsin wondered if you were aware of the effects that your touch on that specific area was likely to cause. Then, when you finally fell asleep and he wrapped his arms around you like the big spoon that he was, you couldn't help moving your hips closer to his to get some of his warmth.
You had no idea of the effect you were having on him with your every move.
The first time you finally got down to business, you kept asking him questions, inevitably asking again and again: "Does that feel good?"
And Halsin had to restrain himself every time, answering as calmly as possible, "I don't think there is any way for me not to feel good with you right now, my heart."
But he remained patient, knowing that the more time passed, the more comfortable you would become, and therefore the more adventurous.
When you asked Halsin to teach you how to jerk him off and give him a blow job, he nearly turned into a bear. You asked lots of questions, testing the waters, touching him a little hesitantly, asking "Does that feel good? Can I touch you there?" so gently that he almost came right then and there.
He tried to contain himself, to stop himself from rutting without waiting as soon as he was inside you, your gummy walls so tight around his girth. He tried to contain himself when he saw you marked by his lips and teeth. He tried to contain himself when you said his name over and over in a voice laced with moans.
Holding on was almost impossible, but he was patient, he knew you would venture further. By Silvanus, was he eager for it.
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marsmaximoff · 3 days ago
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🎄; 25th of december ❄︎⋆˚⊹☃︎
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content warning: fem!reader. pure fluff. many curses. reader is 20 and calls him “dym” as a short name, he calls her “love, darling and my love”. they’re dating. let me know if i missed something.
word count: 732 ❣️
author’s note: i wasn’t planning on posting anything for Christmas, but i got this idea and i had to write it. so, i apologize if the quality is not that good, as i usually spend days on my writings while this was all done on a matter of hours. also, english is my third language, so i’m sorry for the mistakes. constructive criticism is welcomed as always. thank you so much for the support on my last post, and merry christmas everybody! 🤍 happy hanukkah, kwanzaa, diwali or any other celebrations too 🫶🏻 and if you don’t celebrate anything, have a happy end of the year ✨ p.s.: god im in love with dmitri and almost no one is posting anything, i’ll probably post more of him. anyways, enjoy!! <3
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the silk grazes my fingertips as i stretch my arm. i tentatively palm the bed looking for some warmth, for him. but the sheets and pillows are the only things left around me.
the screen of my phone clears up as i blink. 11:28 a.m. with a bit more of focus, the notifications slowly reveal themselves and my eyes travel through them searching for his name. nothing. he’d have texted me if something had requested his presence back at the office. although, he couldn’t have business to deal with on Christmas, right? not this soon, at least.
the pearly white snow greets me through the window making me stand up with a smile. how gorgeous. i make my way to the kitchen to grab something to drink while knotting my robe, and the shiny decor welcomes me effusively. i don’t realize at first, but a big and unfamiliar shadow catches my attention from the corner of my eye while i open the carton of juice.
“holy fuck. dym?”
our christmas tree, stunning as always, lays now almost drowned in presents. in fact, the stack is such, that i can’t even make out the floor for a good four-five steps. some light chuckles behind my back fill the room with the warmth i’ve been craving since i woke up. “beautiful, isn’t it?”
i turn around to dmitri sitting on the couch, staring at me with a huge grin. as if that number of gifts was the most normal sight in the world. “what the hell?” “you’ve had me waiting, darling. did you sleep good?” he asks affectionately.
“what are you, on your Santa Claus era?” i say looking at the presents again. he grants me that laugh that i adore so much as i try to give them a quick count, but after the twentieth, it starts to feel simply bonkers. they’re not even small ‘little treats’, oh no. there’s large boxes and bags everywhere.
“seriously, are you giving gifts to your whole fucking building? or is every one of your men getting one?”
“wrong. and. wrong” he says proudly, and once he’s in front of me, he just smiles. there are obvious love and joy in his eyes, which sends a cute fluttery feeling to my heart. “dmitri-“ his lips seal my words with a gentle kiss. “merry christmas, love”. a sparkle makes space on his gaze that could so easily compete with the star of the tree itself. wait. oh. oh. there’s no way.
his hands take mine and softly walk me towards the swimming pool of gifts. then, he sits close by and points at them with his head. “come on, darling. you’ve had me feeling all impatient”. he looks so excited. so cheerful. but i can’t help the slight guilt that takes over me. “dym, you’re crazy. tell me these are not only for me. you can’t- god do you even have an idea of how many there are?!” “40”. he doesn’t even take a single second to think about it. seriously, what the actual fuck? “two for every christmas i couldn’t spoil you in” this has to be a damn dream. “we’ve been friends since school!” i say grinning. “but we weren’t dating. so it doesn’t count. i wanted to make it special.” “you really didn’t have to” i refute. “i wanted to. please don’t make me wait anymore i need to see your reactions”. with a final glance, i turn around and grab the first one. “ohhh you’ll love that one!”
how can he be so cute? he wasn’t wrong, tho. it was a special edition of one of my favorite books. during the next hours, i go one by one, filling the room with gasps, yells, curses and many “oh my good”s and “thank you so much”s.
by the end of it, i’ve got clothes, books, headphones, plushies, a phone, jewelry, plane tickets, merchandising, signed stuff from famous people i love, and the cherry on top; a new car.
“you are mad. i love you so much but you’re mad” i say hugging him still shocked. “madly in love with you, you mean” he answers pulling back. “you liked them, then?” “loved them” he gives me another kiss, longer this time. “good. merry christmas, my love. i love you” he adds.
he can only hope i’ll love the ring just as much.
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kaliforniahigh · 2 days ago
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birds of a feather, we should stick together - n.s. (part one)
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Best friends to lovers, fake dating and best friend Noah <3
Warnings: a mean character, curse words, Noah makes fun of fine line tattoos, lies and reader trying to fit in to the best of her abilities. If I missed something, let me know!
Part 2 is in the works and coming soon!
WC: 4.3k words.
Requests are closed for now / Click here to be added to the permanent tag list <3
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To say you were overly excited to meet up with your high school friends would be a total lie. When you told Noah they arranged a lunch date, to remember the good old days, he scoffed, and asked you why you even stayed in the group chat with these people.
Truth is, they weren't all bad. Acually, most of them were pretty nice, It was the Regina George of the group, also known as Jade, who fucked up the vibes.
Jade was a mean girl, and she never understood why you were friends with the awkward emo kid, with the side-swept bangs. This emo kid being your best friend, Noah Sebastian, who was the first person you met when you enrolled in a new school, in the middle of the school year.
It was 6th grade, and you had just moved to Richmond, VA. Your dad was transferred, so you had to find a new home, in a new city.
You and Noah became friends fast, being paired up by your English teacher during reading classes, you talked more than you actually read. He found out, that even though it didn't look like it, you enjoyed the same bands as he did. And that you learned to play acoustic guitar from a pretty young age.
You told him that your dad was in a band during his college years, but, due to adult responsabilities, it became more of a hobby for him than anything else.
Soon, the two of you were inseparable. Walking down school corridors together, him going to your house to do homework, and showing you around the city on the weekends.
You were the one who took school more seriously than him, and you were the one who ended up going to college and getting your Master's degree right after. But he was the one who always took you to watch his band practice, who took you to watch his friends - who were always much older than the two of you - perform.
When you were both 15, Noah told you he was going to drop out of high school. You weren't too happy, because you wouldn't have your best friend with you anymore, but you always knew the time would come, and were surprised he didn't decide to do it much sooner.
And that's how you met Jade and her friends. You weren't popular by any means, but, one day, she approached you and asked you how you styled your hair so nicely, and how she loved your pink tips.
You wanted to tell her that your best friend helped you. When you told Noah you wanted a splash of color in your hair, he went to the store with you to buy the necessary things. He wanted you to do purple, but you settled on pink. You remember him huffing in annoyance, telling you that pink was such a boring color.
At home, he helped you with the back of your head, while you spread the vivid color on the front pieces. It turned out amazing, and you joked that he could be a hair stylist if this band thing didn't work out.
Noah and Jade never really got along. The first day they met, Noah was picking you up from school, waiting for you in the parking lot. You remember Jade making a backhanded remark about his tattoos and the way he dresses, and Noah's face turned sour immediately.
After that, anytime they were in the same vicinity, shady comments were thrown by both of them. Noah always commenting about how the bleach in her hair must've gotten to her brain, and Jade commenting about how Noah was a wannabe rockstar.
Noah asked you many times why you kept her around, instead of dumping her and finding new friends, and you always explained how it wasn't that easy.
This was high school, and everyone already had their group of friends, not really being keen on letting other people in. Besides, without him there, and without the girls, you truly had no one else.
At the end of the day, he understood. Noah himself had a hard time making friends, and to this day, he never understood how someone like you decided to befriend him. He knew how being solitary could ruin your years in high school.
Now, sitting in this overpriced lunch spot they found downtown, you were contemplating your life choices as you tried to eat your Caeser salad without grimacing. All of them ordered fucking salads, and you did the same, not wanting to be the only one ordering chicken parm.
"Girlies", Jade said, wiping her mouth with a napking and setting it back down on her lap. "I know this is a reunion, but I have such good news", she clapped her hands excitedly. Typical Jade, always wanting the attention on her.
Everyone stopped eating to pay attention to what she was saying.
"So, you know how Peter proposed to me last year, right?", everyone nodded yes. "We're getting married in two months!", she exclaimed, reaching inside her Louis Vitton bag and pulling out what seemed to be wedding invitations. "And all of you are invited!"
The girls cheered and started to hug her, you did the same, expressing your happines for your friend.
"It's going to be in the Bahamas, in an all-inclusive resort", she informed, handing out the wedding invitations. Meanwhile, you were wondering with what money you were getting your ass to the Bahamas.
"Peter is paying all the expenses, for everyone, so don't even worry about it", she said, as if reading your thoughts.
Jade got engaged to the kind of person everyone thought she was going to date. Peter was a hot shot plastic surgeon based in LA. You had no doubt he racked up millions of dollars every month just fixing people's faces. Jade herself had something new done everytime you met up.
"What about you, Y/N? Who are you bringing as your plus one?", Emma asked. You guess you zoned out and missed part of the conversation.
"You're bringing your boyfriend, right?", Lily chimed in.
Did they even know if you had a boyfriend or not? You looked around the table, all the girls waiting for your answer. You didn't know what to say. Suddenly, your eyes noticed all of their beautiful engagement rings, and you didn't have the courage to say you were still single.
"Yeah, of course", you answered, hoping you were convincing.
"Uhh, that's amazing! Who is he?", Jade asked, excitment coating her voice.
Shit. Who the fuck would you say is your boyfriend?
"Noah", you said. He was the first person to come to mind, and you didn't hesitate to say his name.
You saw Jade's face twist in a frown.
"You're dating Noah?", she asked, judgment evident in her tone.
"Hmm, yeah, for a while now", you were lying through your teeth at this point.
"Well", she shrugged. "I guess it was always gonna happen anyways", and just like that, the rest of the girls went back to their conversations, while you mulled over what the hell you had just done.
You were already gonna tell Noah to come with you to the wedding the moment she handed out the invitations, which, was going to be a difficult task in itself, since Noah held a grudge against Jade to this day. But you were sure you could convince him with the all-inclusive resort argument.
Now, not only did you have to convince him to go with you, but you had to tell him you told the girls you were dating?
You were already thinking of excuses not to go.
When everyone was finished with their meals, they slowly started to say their goodbyes. You did the same, giving each one of them a kiss on the cheek as you made your way out of the restaurant and to your car.
When you got in, you instantly fished your phone from your purse, dialing Noah's number.
"You need saving from the botox bitch?", Noah answered the phone. You rolled your eyes, but laughed anyway.
"I'm already leaving the restaurant, actually. I was calling to ask if I can come over"
"Since when do you call to ask if you can come over?", he asked, confusion in his voice. He was right, you usually just showed up.
"I don't know? To make sure you're home?"
"You know I'm always home"
"Can I comer over or not?", you asked again, a hint of fake annoyance in your voice.
"Of course you can"
"Then I'll see you in fifteen", you said, hanging up the phone and starting your car.
On the way over to Noah's house, you've been thinking about how you were going to break the news. You still had a little while to think about what you were going to tell him, but, you knew that as soon as he saw your face, he'd know you were hiding something from him.
So, without an actual plan, you decided to tell him today. That way, you wouldn't have to torture youself for days with this information, and you gave him more time to prepare. That is, if he even decided to go.
You trusted your abilities to convince him, though. Noah had a history of doing whatever you wanted just to see you happy, and you never took advantage of that, but desperate times call for for desperate measures. Besides, a vacation to the Bahamas, with all expenses paid, didn't seem all that bad. Even if you had to endure Jade for a few days.
Parking outside, you gave yourself a pep talk before leaving your car and locking it behind you. Using your spare key, you unlocked the front door and made your way inside the living room, announcing your arrival by calling Noah's name.
"I'm right here, what are you yelling for?", he answered from the couch, the PS5 controller in his hands. You just shrugged in answer, and sat next to him.
Grabbing your purse, you pulled out the fancy wedding invitation Jade had handed to you, and set it on the couch beside him and between the two of you. Grabbing it and reading what was written in gold letters, Noah's eyebrows shot up in surprise.
"Oh, so the queen of botox is getting married to the king of botox?", you gave him a sideways glance, but smiled at his nicknames for the couple. It did suit them, after all.
"Yeah, they are. Jade couldn't help but announce it today", you pointed out.
"Well, are you going?", he asked, setting the invitation back down.
"Hmm. It depends, I guess", you answered, avoiding his eyes and you could tell he already clocked that something is wrong.
"Why?", he asked, a little hesitant.
"Jade said we can bring a plus one"
"Yeah, you usually can at weddings"
"And I was thinking....", you trailed off and looked at him, seeing the exact moment the realization dawned on him, and he immediately started to shake his head.
"There is no way", he said, getting up from the couch and walking over to the kitchen. You got up as well and went after him.
"Why not?", you asked him, a little bit of whining in your voice.
"Are you seriously asking 'why not'?"
"I mean, I know you don't like her, but c'mon, this is gonna be a nice wedding. Besides, it's in the Bahamas, and Peter is paying for everything", you argued.
"Is it's because it's in the Bahamas, I can pay for a vacation for us in the Bahamas, no problem", he crossed his arms against his chest.
"It's not because of that"
"Y/N", he stepped closer towards you. "You know you can just go alone, right?"
"I can't go alone", you huffed in annoyance, because his argument was totally valid, but you did not have that option anymore, all because of your big mouth and will to please everyone.
"Why not?", he asked, confusion etched all over his face.
"Because...", your shoulders slumped as you realized the gravity of your mistake.
"Hey", he grabbed your shoulders, sensing your discomfort. You were never uncomfortable around him, so this behaviour from you scared him a little bit. "You can tell me, what is it?"
"I told them I have a boyfriend", you say, voice low and a little embarassed.
"But you don't have a boyfriend", he observed the obvious, having difficulty in understanding where you were going with this.
"I told them it was you", you looked down towards the floor, fingers going to rub your forehead as you waited for his reaction. The seconds ticked by, and the silence ate you alive.
"You...", he started, but stopped himself in his tracks, head going over what you just told him, to make sure he got it right. "You told them we were dating?", you answered with a head nod, still looking down.
"Y/N", he said your name with a little bit of annoyance lacing his tone. He looked up at the ceiling, as if willing the heavens to give him the strength to deal with you.
"I know, I know", you say, looking up at him. "It was just that they were drilling me about this and I didn't know what to do!"
"Tell them you're not dating anyone?", he deadpanned, and you hated that he kept stating the obvious.
"Yeah, but they already see me as the odd one out, what are they gonna think when I tell them that I'm almost thirty and not dating anyone? They're all engaged, for fucks sake!", you exclaimed and started to pace around the kitchen.
"You worry about what they think of you too much", Noah pointed out. He hated the way you felt like you always had to please them, they way you always thought you had to fit in into their world.
"It's ok, I'll just come up with an excuse so I don't have to go to the wedding", you waved your hand, dismissing this conversation. You were already feeling your head start to throb. You made your way to the couch, grabbing your purse, and the invitation.
Behind you, you hear Noah let out a big breath, before softly calling out your name. You stopped in front of the door and turned around to face him.
"You owe me big fucking time", he pointed a finger at you, and you couldn't help but let a smile dance over your lips.
"You're gonna do this?", you asked, a little doubtful.
"You're doing my laundry for two weeks", he comprimised. "No, three weeks. Fuck it, you're doing my laundry for a whole fucking month"
You cheered at this, not minding it one bit. His laudry was easy since he only had black clothes.
You skipped your way over to him, reaching your arms up and circling them around his neck to pull him into a hug. You couldn't see, but he had a smile on his lips as well.
At this moment, Noah thinks he would do just about anything to keep you happy.
"At least she can't make fun of your hair anymore", you observed, as you parted from him. He groaned in reply.
"Don't fucking push it", he warned you, but there was no real threat to his words.
"Oh!", you snapped your fingers as you remembered an important information about the wedding. "I forgot to tell you something"
"What is it?", he asked, looking at you sideways in suspiscion.
"It's at an all-inclusive resort", you wiggled your eyebrows suggestively. "Besides", you continued "Jade's probably gonna invite so many people, we won't even cross paths with her", you observed.
"I hope you're right"
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To say you had a lot of time to prepare was a lie. Time flew by incredibly fast, and in between work, choosing a dress and picking up a suit for Noah - who complained endlessly about having to wear it, you argued that he can't wear a black tank top to a wedding, and he huffed and puffed even more - you were only one day away from boarding the plane.
You were going over everything in your suitcase. Another thing Noah was going to complaing about, you can hear his voice in your head asking you why you needed so much stuff. You zipped it up when you decided that obsessively thinking if you forgot anything was not going to make you magically remember something.
You texted Noah that you were ready for him to pick you up. You both decided it was best if you slept over at his house, and he was asking one of the boys to drive you over to the airport for practical reasons.
It wasn't too long before you heard honking outside, signaling Noah's arrival. You took everything you needed, and looked around you to make sure you locked everything up, and when you were satisfied with your quick inspection, you walked over and opened the front door.
Noah was opening the trunk when he saw you.
"Don't say anything", you raised your hand up to stop the words you were sure were going to stumble from his lips. He raised his arms up in surrender and didn't say anything. But, he did make overexaggerated grunting noises as he hauled your bags inside the trunk. You ignored him and went to lock your front door instead.
Getting in the car and driving away, you pulled your phone from your pocket.
"Jade already texted the flight information", you observed.
"At least she's competent", he retorted.
"Imma need you to try and be civil, at least. Remember we're going to enjoy the beach and drinks", you reminded him of what you've been saying for the past weeks. "And you can't call them botox queen and botox king".
"If she doesn't talk shit about my tattoos, we'll be fine", he argued back.
"Her husband has tattoos", you pointed out, as if that makes the situation any better.
"I bet it's some fine line pussy ass tattoo of a lion or some shit like that", he grunted in annoyance, remembering he's gonna have to deal with Jade AND her husband.
"You know what?", you rubbed you chin in thought. "I think it actually is", you pondered, and you both couldn't help but cackle out loud about the fact that he was most likely right about the tattoo.
The rest of the day went on without a hitch. You ordered some food so you didn't get any pans or pots dirty before traveling, and soon, you were both ready for bed, since you were leaving pretty early in the morning to catch your flight.
You were getting comfortable in Noah's left side of the bed, when he came in the room, dressed in sweatpants and a hoodie, joining you under the covers.
Plugging your phone to charge, you turn to look at him, doing the same.
"Did you set the alarm?", you asked and he hummed a yes. "Did you set it really loud?", he hummed in reply once again.
He knew you got anxious whenever you had to do something important in the morning. You always thought some entity was going to disable the alarms you set on your phone and you wouldn't wake up in time.
"Don't worry, we'll get there with lots of time to spare", he reassured you, and opened his arms so you could lay against his chest.
Sleep found you easily, as it always did whenever you and Noah slept on the same bed. You were used to sleeping in an empty house, since you've been living on your own ever since you moved for college. But to say your sleep was calm and serene was a lie.
With him, you felt safer, like he could protect you from everything and anything. You trusted him more than you trusted anyone else in your life.
Noah, wasn't as tired as you were, and he contemplated how these days were going to go over as he waited for your breath to even out. It was a ritual of sorts whenever you two slept together. He always waited for you to fall asleep first. And, sometimes, when you had difficulty sleeping, he sang some soft tunes, or rubbed your scalp the way he knew you liked, and that always did the trick.
Next time you woke up, was with Noah's shrill alarm ringing on the bedside table. He really did set it really loud, because you were groaning and telling him to turn it off. He woke up with a yawn, disentangling his arm from under your torso to finally quiet the alarm.
Yawning and stretching your limbs all over the bed, you heard Noah chuckle beside you.
"You're like a damn cat, stretching like that", he pointed out, looking at you with a smile on his face.
He always thought you were the most adorable in the morning. Your hair was a little messed up, and your eyes were all tired and fighting sleep. A part of him wished he could just pull you back to rest beside him and resume sleep. But, the trip from hell awaited the two of you.
Getting up from the bed, he announced he was going to brush his teeth and take a shower, meanwhile, you busied yourself gathering all of the suicases and backpacks downstairs.
As soon as Noah left the bathroom, you went in there and did your morning routine as well as you could with your stuff all packed away. Luckily, you kept a few things over at his place for convenience.
Changing into something comfortable for the airport, you made your way downstairs and found Noah dressed in usual sweatpants and hoodie combo.
"Did you grab your sleep mask? I won't lend you mine this time", you told him. Last time, you had to endure a whole flight without your sleep mask, because Noah had forgotten his, and you had no heart to tell him no when he asked to borrow yours.
"Yes, ma'am. I grabbed my sleep mask", he answered. "I already texted Jolly, and he's on his way to pick us up".
"Did you lock everything up?"
"Yep, already checked the entire house while you were showering"
Noah was used to this. You had a ritual everytime you were travelling, and he learned that getting ahead of you was the best thing to do. That way, you wouldn't get stressed with things he didn't do, or forgot.
Right on cue, you heard a horn souding outside, Noah opened the door and was greeted with Jolly waving from inside the car.
"Ok, let's go", you clapped your hands in a "chop chop" motion.
On the way to the airport, Noah and Jolly chatted on the front seat, while you went over the flight details on your phone, making sure everything was in order for check-in. Noah hated airports, so he left you in charge of everything he found boring.
The drive was short, and soon, you were bidding Jolly goodbye at the drop off zone, and you didn't miss the little pat on the back and the "good luck" he wished Noah before getting back in his car and driving away.
Checking-in, you and Noah found a place to sit while he grabbed some breakfast for the two of you. While you sat there, eating and waiting, you were reminded of a very important detail that you forgot to discuss with him.
"Oh, my God! I totally forgot to talk to you about something", you exclaimed, swatting him in the chest to get his attention.
"This is the second time you forgot to tell me something about this wedding trip", he said.
"When they ask us how we got together, what are we gonna tell them?", you ask him. You've been going over all the lies you'd need to tell during this trip, and you realized that you and Noah didn't have a game plan at all.
"That one day, you professed your undying love for me and then we started to date?", he said, as if the answer was obvious, but you could tell he was sprinkling a little bit of sarcasm in there.
"I'm serious, Noah", you huffed, looking at him. "We have to be beliveable, otherwise, they'll catch on, and ruin the whole thing"
"We can just tell them that we realized we wanted to have something more than just a friendship", he suggested, and the idea wasn't so bad. Jade always said you'd end up together from how much time you spend with each other.
"Out of nowhere?"
"No, we've been hiding our feelings, thinking that the other didn't feel the same way, until, one day, I told you I liked you and you told me you liked me too", you rubbed your chin, thinking over his plan. "It's not overcomplicated and if we stick to the same story, we'll be fine", he reassued you. "Besides, Jade is so self-absorbed she'll probably not even ask anything about us at all"
"That's very likely", you agreed with his reasoning. After all, it was Jade's wedding, so the light is gonna be on her, and not on you and Noah.
"What about PDA?", you broached another subject that you've been avoiding.
"If you wanna kiss me, you can just ask, you know?", he teased you, nudging you with his shoulder.
"It's not what I meant, and you know it", you told him, but you weren't able to hide the little blush covering your cheeks, and he noticed too, by the way he was grinning.
"I can hold your hand. I mean, I kind of already do. But let's just go with the flow. You don't have to worry too much about this, it's just a couple of days, after all", he said, and he was right. You and Noah meshed well and were usually in the same wavelength, so there was no reason to think things were going to go south.
You just hoped you had time to relax and enjoy the beach, the drinks and the foods, which, if you knew Jade as well as you did, were going to be impeccable.
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Tag list: @concreteangel92 @foliosgirl @collisionofyourkissmakesitsohard @stardustsirenmelody @miwomens @concretejunglefm @fadingangelwisp @prettygirlrock126 @dontwantthemoney @tosoundlessdarkistare @babygirlchuuya @follow-me-down-to-wonderland @lacy1986 @romanreigns-supreme @xmads-omensx @missduffsblog @rumoured-whispers @thisbicc @badomensgoodomens @floatingkiwi @collective-heartbreak @dontwantthemoney @dream-machine-love @alwaysfightforwhoyouare @amelia-acero @kenjipepsi1 @montgomery-929496 @daddy-dierkes-girlie @stardustsirenmelody @cheyyyyr @triedbimsoblu333 @xxkatsatwatwafflexx @noyaisasimp @youlookforultraviolet @w0manof-flesh44 @chaoticwineaunt @geminigirlfromfinland @turn-your-life-into-folklore @butterflyeffect07 @zozaline @deardelirium @ferduttini @jilliemiw86 @alylanaeblack @lilcrazy011
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ohmystaxk · 14 hours ago
Text
For there is beauty | Chapter One: What is science, if not risks?
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[MASTERLIST] | [NEXT]
Tags/Warnings: Time Travel, Jayce is a Sweetheart, Jayce and Reader are childhood friends, Idiots in Love, Reader has a backstory, Undercity!Reader, Cait is Jayce and Reader's little sister, Protective Jayce, Jayce's Love Language is Physical Touch, Mutual Pining, Viktor-centric, Sassy Viktor, Viktor Needs a Hug, Viktor has a crush on Reader, Accidental Fake Dating, Miscommunication, Slow Burn Jayce/Reader/Viktor, Eventual Jayce/Viktor, Reader is greedy, Smut, Slow Romance, Romance, Canon Related, Possible AU timelines, Fluff, Angst, Reader has parents, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Not Beta Read
Summary: Life was simple. You woke up each morning, and walked the streets of Piltover with Jayce by your side, joking and laughing while Cait could only roll her eyes at the two of you. You worked hard on your research and studied double as much at the Academy to prove your worth. Each day was the same, but that was until you crossed paths with Professor Heimerdinger's assistant at the library one day. His name escaped you, but that never stopped your curiosity for the man. Viktor, he said his name was. And you left the library with that, not expecting to cross paths with him again.
It was then the nightmares began, dreadful glimpses of a world you wish to never exist. A world empty of life, happiness, and freedom. But they were only that, nightmares, nothing more. So why did they feel so vivid? So real, and tangible?
N/A: hello everyone! just like everyone else, I folded and started writing for arcane. I have only watched the show, so my knowledge is ONLY from it! english is not my first language, so I apologize for any mistakes you might encounter along the way.
I currently have 3 chapters written for the fic and I cannot wait to show them to all of you!
I have created playlists that I encourage you to listen to while reading (spotify, yt music and apple music) this fic!
spotify yt music apple music
I will also be uploading this to my ao3: @ohmystaxk
Track List: 1.Breakfast with Lou 2.Bewitched 3.Cinnamon Girl
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The warmth was the first thing you noticed, something almost comforting. You let out a breath you were not aware you were holding in the first place. The blood in your body rose to your head as something touched your forehead; that same warmth now replaced your blood, running down every vein, clinging to each cell. It was becoming one with you.
“We were always one .” A voice, distorted and unfamiliar, spoke.
Your heart is empty of blood, only pumping warmth. Your chest is heavy, your lungs chasing for that last bit of air.
“Do not be afraid.” The touch on your forehead shifted to your cheek. “I am right here with you.”
You wanted to open your eyes, look around, and find where that voice originated. You tried to turn your head around, but the touch on your cheek moved to your chin, holding your face in place. Even when the touch was demanding, you did not feel threatened.
“Soon, you will see. ” The voice was different, almost that of a woman. “Truly see what has been hiding underneath. It is time for you to go back. ”
Your body suddenly regained its bearings, jolting you awake as you gasped. The morning light blinded you, forcing your eyes to close once again. Your heart beating worryingly fast, your head felt heavy, and your body tingled. The sound of faraway voices made your head snap towards it, your brows furrowed as footsteps crept closer your way. Then a knock came from the door of your bedroom.
“Are you awake? Did you stay up too late again?”
When you recognized the voice, you pushed the comforter away and stood up from your bed. Your head spun, and your vision went blurry. Suddenly, your knees hit the floor.
Your door flew open.
“Hey, what's wrong?” A pair of hands touched you, one on your back and the other on your forearm. “What happened?”
You grabbed your head with one hand, frowning from the buzzing feeling.
“I don’t think I’m feeling too good right now, Jayce.” Looking up to meet his eyes, you only saw worry in them.
“Yeah, no kidding.” He scoffed awkwardly.
He moved his hand on your arm towards your elbow while the other took your waist.
With some effort, he helped you stand up, walking you back to your bed.
“How did you get in?” You asked once you sat back down at the edge of the mattress.
“I remembered where you keep the spare key.” Jayce stood in front of you, his eyes looking around your room.
“Is everything alright?” You heard a voice coming from somewhere in your apartment.
“Did you bring Cait here with you?” You asked the man with a whisper, eyebrows raised in surprise.
“Yeah, she wanted to come over to the workshop again.” Jayce crouched, amber eyes taking in your features. “Cait!” He called out to the girl.
“Yes?” She answered quickly, a bit of a tremble in her voice.
“Could you bring me a glass of water, please?”
“Oh...Yes!” You then hear the girl walk to what you knew to be your kitchen.
“Hey.” You looked back at Jayce, not realizing you had started to space out. “What are you feeling? Do you need us to take you to a clinic?”
“No-. Just…I’m just a bit dizzy, that’s all.”
Caitlyn entered the room, glass of water in hand as she eyed you. It was a similar look to the one Jayce was giving you.
“Thanks, Cait.” Jayce looked over his shoulder, and the girl walked over and handed him the glass.
“Are you alright?” She hugged herself, head tilted to the side.
“I will be, just a minute.” You sighed, bringing your hand to your temple.
“Here.” Jayce gently handed you the glass, keeping his hand on yours. “I still think we should take you to a clinic.”
“You look pale.” Cait pointed out, leaning against the small dresser in your room.
“I’ll be fine, I promise.” You rolled your eyes, scoffing as you finally took the glass and drank from it.
“Did you feel like this last night?” Jayce held the glass for you once you finished the water.
“No. I felt fine. I think…” Your mind wonders about your strange dream, and how it made you feel.
“What is it?” Jayce leaned closer, tilting his head to catch your gaze.
“I had a strange dream. It startled me. I felt just like I did now; I was dreading something.”
“What was it?” Cait asked, curiosity getting the best of her.
“I don’t know, my eyes were closed the entire time. I just heard a voice.”
Jayce frowned. He placed a gentle hand on your knee before he stood up.
“I think I will take Cait back to her house. I’ll come back with something for you to eat-.”
“No, I’m already feeling better, Jayce.” You stood up, your legs giving you the support you needed.
“You don’t have to exert yourself.”
“I’m not.” You looked at the man with a smile. “Besides, Cait and I know you will barely get things done if I’m not there to help.”
You gave his arm a quick squeeze. Then you walked towards your closet, opened it, and heard Jayce take a few steps.
“We can work on it once you feel better.”
“I feel better, Jayce.” You looked over your shoulder. The man sighed, running a hand through his hair. “I’m going to change and then we can head out.”
“Just-...Yell if you need anything.” He stepped back, then turned around, heading to the door. “Come on, Cait.”
The two of them walked out of the room, closing the door behind them.
You let out a heavy sigh, your hands going to your face. It was true that you were not feeling great, but you were feeling better than before. You stayed up late the night before, reviewing notes from Jayce's project, while also studying for your research paper. You had also forgotten to eat anything, perhaps that had affected you now.
Walking through the streets of Piltover alongside Jayce and Cait had become a bit of a routine for the three of you. Since Counsellor Kiramman had acquired the lab for Jayce, Caitlyn had started tagging along. Especially after she heard about your and Jayce’s projects. Cait was curious, always wanting to help the two of you with whatever was necessary. 
She seemed to enjoy watching you correct Jayce’s work, or talk to her about engineering and the theories for your research paper. It was funny really; two people in their twenties hanging out with a teenager, who they saw like a little sister. The truth was, Caitlyn, reminded you a lot of Jayce all those years ago. 
You opened the front door of your home, sunset had started to set by the time you arrived. You took off your bag and let it fall by the entrance, voices came from the kitchen, and you looked up to find your mother seated on the dining table, a woman across from her as the two laughed. Your mother’s gaze fell on you, a bright smile on her face as she widened her eyes.
“There you are! How was school, baby?” She stood up and gently placed the mug she had in hand on the table. “Come here, I want you to meet someone.”
You slowly approached the table, the other woman turned on her chair, and she smiled once she saw you. Her hair was a dark brown, almost black. Her eyes were light brown and she had a pretty mole next to her right eye.
“Oh, isn’t she adorable?” The woman said. Your mother met you halfway, placing a hand on your shoulder and the other between your shoulder blades, nudging you towards her.
“Say hi, baby.” Your mother brushed a strand of hair behind your ear.
“Hello,” Your voice was small, just above a whisper. You played with your hands.
“Hello, your mother was just telling me about you. I’m Ximena, a friend.” She extended her hand to you, and with a trembling hand, you took it. “Oh, you are a bit shy. Please don’t be.”
“Ximena is a friend of your dad and me. She has a son your age, and we wanted the two of you to get to know each other.” Your mother explained with a smile. “Now, take a sit while I serve you dinner, you must be hungry by now.”
Your mother gently directed you towards the table, you took a seat and watched Ximena as she adjusted herself on her chair.
“Oh yes, my boy should be here any minute now. I believe the two of you go to the same school, but he is a year older than you, sweetheart.” At that you frowned, wondering who her son was out of all the boys in your school.
“Okay.” That was the only thing you could reply with. Under the table you kept playing with your hands, your nails picking at the skin.
“You didn’t tell me how school was? Did the professor grade the painting yet?” Your mother asked, your nails dug deeper into the flesh.
“I-it was okay. She liked it.”
“I’m glad she did! I told Ximena how hard you have been working on the art project.” You bit your lip, your vision blurring as you picked even more at the skin.
A knock came from the front door. Ximena stood up from her chair, fixing her skirt as she walked to the door.
“Must be my boy.” She said, you did not look up, your eyes focused on the markings on the table.
The door opened, and you tuned out the voices, your lips quivering as your vision became blurry. Your heart was heavy on your chest, and the next thing you knew, you heard your mother call your name.
In front of you was a boy, and his honey eyes were so bright and shiny. He smiled at you, a tooth gap on his front teeth. But his smile failed him, his brows furrowing as he looked at you.
“Sweetheart,” It was Ximena who spoke. “Are you alright?” You could hear the worry in her voice as you quickly stood up and ran to your room.
You shut the door behind you, falling face-first on the mattress as you started sobbing into the pillow. The door opened and you felt the weight shift the mattress someone sat down next to you.“What’s wrong?” Your mother brushed your hair away from your face. “Did something happen?”
You shook your head, sobbing even more. Your mother ran her fingers through your hair, traveling down to soothe your back.
“You know you can tell me anything, baby.”
“T-they they ri-pped the paint-ing.” You struggled in between sobs. Your mother immediately pulled you closer to her, hugging you tightly.
“Who did?” Your mother spoke at the top of your head.
“T-hey said I w-was an Under-city r-rat.” You cried even harder into the crook of your mother’s neck.
After your mother calmed you down and assured you the kids were wrong, she left you in your room to get you food. You lay in your bed, curled up as you traced the patterns on the wall.
“Did you paint those?” You quickly sat up on your bed, your head snapping to the door, standing there was Ximena’s son. His gaze was on one of the paintings on one of the walls of your room.
“M-my mom and me.” You replied, and your voice came out hoarse and small.
“And this one?” He pointed at another one, you now were by the edge of the bed, your legs barely touching the floor.
“Me.” When you said that, he turned to face you. Your face was puffed up, your eyes red from crying.
“I like it.” He said, and the boy walked up to you, he sat down on the bed next to you. “My name is Jayce.” You told him your name, and he smiled at you. “You have a pretty name.”
It was later you two shared your curiosity for science and inventions. You two finally found things in common; Magic, science, art, and literature. It was those moments that had led to your friendship of twelve years .
“Like I said, I was reviewing my notes.” You rolled your eyes. Jayce walked right beside you, your shoulders brushing.
“And are you sure to went straight to bed?” He leaned down a bit, wanting to see your face as you held the strap of your bag tightly. “Did you eat anything?”
“Well-.”
“I knew it!” He snapped his fingers, pointing forward as you tilted your head away with a sigh, closing your eyes. “I told you we could stop by and get some dinner.”
“I wasn’t hungry…” You looked at him.
Jayce’s hair was neatly styled. You could smell his aftershave as he leaned over, his arm reaching your right shoulder, pulling you closer to him.
“Aren’t you the one always reminding me to eat? Especially when I don’t want to.”
“You do always remind him.” Cait shimmed in. When you look to your right to narrow your eyes at her, she simply shrugs.
“Thanks, Cait.” Jayce now wrapped his arm over your shoulders, pulling you even closer. “Which is why we are grabbing a bite before we head to the studio.” You threw your head back.
“I need to stop by the library first.” You glanced up at Jayce, his amber eyes narrowing. “Just remembered that I need to get some books.”
“Right now?” He asked with a pointed look.
“Might as well, the library is right across.” You pointed with your eyes at the massive building across the street.
Jayce slowed down his steps, making you slow down as well.
“Your research paper?” He asked.
“Yeah.” You gave his chest a quick pat and pulled back a bit, his arm sliding over your back before he too pulled away. “I still need to finish the draft before I can start working on the actual paper.”
You adjusted the weight of your bag.
“Think you feel better to head on your own?” Jayce scratched his head, eying you as you laughed.
“Don’t worry, if I need a big strong man to help me, I’m sure I can find one there.” You slapped his arm with the back of your hand. Jayce rolled his eyes, scoffing at the comment. “I won’t stay long, how about you start heading over and grab me something to eat? I’ll see you two in a few.”
“You want the same thing from yesterday?” He asked as you were already starting to walk away.
“Sure, sounds good. Cait, keep an eye on this one, don’t let him wander off with strange women.” You smiled at the girl, and Cait simply laughed with a nod.
“I-. I don’t wander off!” He called out once you started crossing the street.
“Didn’t hear you deny the last part though!” You laughed as you ran, holding your bag tightly.
The Piltover library was massive, with three floors and an impressive collection, even containing two extra lower levels for more restricted books and archives. You immediately went to the second floor, walking past tall bookshelves. The sunlight was casting different colors due to the stained glass from the windows. Then you took a turn, finding the section you were looking for. You stopped when you saw that someone was standing at the other end. He had brown hair and a strong nose, his focus deep in a book. The man leaned on a cane, the light filtering from the stained glass casting a yellow glow on him.
With a thud, he closed the book he was reading. He placed the book back on the shelf, his eyes looking at the spines. You recognized him as Professor Heimerdinger's apprentice; his name escaped you. 
You fixed your bag, and you focused on the book titles closest to you, trying to see if you could find what you were looking for. But with every two books you looked at, your eyes could not help but glance towards him.
You had always seen him around the academy, always on his own. Whenever you saw him, he would be reading a book or writing something down in his notebook. You had asked about him out of curiosity a good number of times to other students, they also seemed to barely know anything about him. Then there were a couple that mentioned how his mysteriousness was rather, attractive. But the only thing that everyone seemed to agree on was that he was… gifted . He had to be if he had caught the attention of the Dean.
Without knowing, you were already standing shoulder to shoulder next to him. You accidentally bumped into him.
“I’m sorry!” You immediately uttered, your eyebrows shooting up and your face burning hot. “I was distracted.”
He already had another book in hand. He looked your way, seemingly also surprised. His eyes scanned you, falling on your eyes before he spoke.
“No need to worry.” He said with an accent you didn’t quite recognize, it sounded nice. “I didn’t see you.” It suits him.
The man took a step to the side to create some distance between the two of you.
“Sorry.” You said more quietly, your eyes glancing back and forth between him and the shelves.
As you tried your best to compose yourself, your eyes caught sight of a book you were looking for. You looked at him, making sure you were not in his way, and reached for it.
“Excuse me, going to grab this.” You called out. 
You needed to finish the research paper, three months had gone by so fast that trying to meet the deadline felt almost impossible.
Once you picked it up, you noticed a few more and quickly grabbed them. You stepped back with your stack of books and turned around, heading back to the main hall. 
That was until you heard his cane and feet shift.
“Those are about Astrophysics.” The man suddenly spoke again. Your eyes widened as you stood in place. “Is it curiosity or for research?”
 You looked over your shoulder, your eyes meeting with his bright amber eyes; they were similar to Jayce’s, but perhaps they were a bit lighter.
“B-both.” You were caught off guard. After many years and countless times of seeing him around the Academy; this was the first time you had interacted with him.
“Um.” He gave a quick nod. His eyes shifted towards your books before meeting your gaze once more.
“It’s research. For my final.” You fixed your posture, your body turning to face his.
“I have…seen you before, in the academy.” He stated, shifting his weight on the cane more comfortably.
“Yes, I’m part of the Engineering department.” You put the weight of the books on your hip. “Or I was. I was part of Professor Heimendinger’s lecture last summer.”
“Oh.” He’s eyebrows rose a fraction. “I remember now. You sat close to the middle row.”
You remembered when you and Jayce had arrived at the lecture for the first time. How excited he was, talking your ear off as the two of you sat down. You remembered how dark the auditorium always was, except for the chalkboard and the podium the Professor stood. It became a habit to always sit in the same spot, not out of preference, but it just did. Sometimes whenever someone decided to take those two spots, you and Jayce would jokingly say things like ‘ The audacity. ’ or ‘ We should start carving our names on the desk at this point. ’
It was then you remember seeing the assistant in the corner of the room many times, almost like he was hiding in the shadows. You would meet his eyes on occasion, even in the dark you were always impressed by how bright his eyes seemed to shine.
“Yes.” You let out a chuckle. Your eyebrows furrowing. How did he remember that? “And you are the Professor’s assistant.”
His eyes fell on your hips, taking note of your posture. “I am, yes.”
“How did you get the offer?” You fixed the hold on the books. “That’s a very big opportunity.”
“My charms I believe.” He shrugged. You smiled as you let out a laugh.
“Oh yes, those are very important.” You took a step forward. “Every inventor needs them.”
“Not everyone has those.” He grinned as he placed back the book he was holding on the shelf.
“Do I?” You played along.
He stopped his hand, his fingertips brushing the spine of the book. He raised an eyebrow, amber eyes staring at yours with curiosity.
“Um.” He eyed you. “What is it that intrigues you the most? Astrophysics or Engineering?”
You scoffed and rolled your eyes. What a charmer , you thought.
“Why not both?” You tilted your head to the side with a grin.
He nodded with a smile. You noticed the moles adorning his cheek and upper lip.
“Well, what is it about Astrophysics that made you want to pursue it?”
“The many unanswered questions space holds from us; about gravity, the sun, and the moon. But I didn’t get into Astrophysics for that only. I am searching for something more, something out there in the universe.”
“Which is?” He took a step forward.
“Magic.” You answered breathlessly. “Time, space, the possibility of actions and consequences. What other possibilities those could have led to.”
“Time travel.” He answered, his eyes widen a fraction.
“Multiple timelines possibly coexisting within the same plane. I believe the Arcane is capable of that.”
He looked at you, his eyes shifting between yours and the books still resting on your hip.
“The Arcane is wild magic…not something science could master.”
“You’re right, but I believe science could help us understand magic.” You started talking with your hand. “I’m not thinking of bending the Arcane to science’s will. But I wish to find an understanding.”
The two of you stood there in silence. The noise of people speaking and walking around soothing your nerves. It had been your dream that had connected you with Jayce, the mutual understanding of what magic could do and the wonders it held.
“Those types of ideas could get you expelled from the Academy.” If he had spoken those words with a serious tone, it would have scared you. Instead, he still held curiosity in his eyes. “But what is science, if not risks?”
You let out a breath you did not know you were holding in. You frowned.
“Are you going to tell the Professor?” You watched him soften his eyes.
“I’m his assistant, not his whisperer.” He grinned and you could not help but let out a nervous laugh.
“I have to go…” You held his gaze. “It was nice to finally talk to you.”
“Likewise.” He smiled at you. You felt your cheeks suddenly heat up. “You have a great mind.”
“Thank you…” You were going to say his name when you realized you could not remember it. 
“Vik tor .” You felt a sudden touch in the back of your head. Your eyes narrowed for a second, you could’ve sworn you heard his voice change. “You can call me Viktor.”
“T-Thank you, Viktor.” You gave him your name, taking a step back as you slowly started retreating. “I will go now.”
You turned around and started heading to the hall. Your heart started beating fast once more. Perhaps, you were still having side effects. Or the Academy was making you begin to lose your mind.
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loganhowlettshousewife · 24 hours ago
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logan howlett x latina!reader
series masterlist - my masterlist
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“i need to learn spanish,” logan says out of the blue as you’re carefully doing your makeup. he likes to watch you get ready in the mornings, and though you don’t understand his fascination with the process you’ve been doing for years, it’s nice to have him around.
“is there a reason for this?” you ask, trying not to allow the conversation to distract you from the task at hand. you’ve gotten good at this, at both getting ready and talking to him, having conversations about everything and nothing, the kind of conversations he would never have with anyone else.
you met logan a few months ago, when he accompanied a group of mutant kids to canada, almost dying in the process to save them. he’d been on the verge of death when you found him, skin sallow and pale from the intense blood loss, breathing ragged. it hits you sometimes how lucky you are to have found him in time, to have been able to bring him back to his daughter - every day you’re infinitely grateful.
he’s struggled to adapt to life here. eden, a sanctuary for mutants that reminds him a bit too much of the x-mansion, the place where everything in his life went wrong. where he’d let his guard down little by little, letting people see past his mask, making relationships only to watch them all die. he could do nothing to save them.
so he hardly interacts with anyone other than you and laura kinney, his daughter, though lately she’s decided she wants everyone to call her laura howlett. the look on logan’s face when he told you was one you’d never forget: joy and fear and confusion, adoration for his little girl tinged with the anxiety of knowing that anyone close to him usually suffered terribly.
“laura,” he grumbles, which is the answer you expected. despite living in mexico for quite a few years, he didn’t pick up much spanish, and certainly not enough to understand laura’s rapid-fire quips. “she always says shit in spanish when she doesn’t want me to know what she’s sayin’.”
you laugh. laura’s a bright kid, and it’s true that she enjoys insulting logan in spanish, but only at the same frequency as her english insults towards him. most of the time her spanish comments are neither good nor bad, just stream of consciousness comments. she enjoys logan’s frustration at not being able to understand her, so really it doesn’t matter what she says, just that he hears it.
“i can try to teach you,” you reply, “but i’ve never taught anyone a language before, so be warned i may not be good at it.”
“a lot of people here speak spanish. i didn’t ask them.” logan says, “you’re the only person i can stand bein’ around for more than a few minutes, so you got a better shot than anyone else.”
you feel a rush of giddy excitement flow through you in response to his words. it’s not a secret that you find logan horribly, unbearably attractive with his salt-and-pepper hair and his beard and his deep eyes and his arms and honestly you could spend hours listing every one of his attractive features.
the point is, you want to kiss him stupid, and with the way he lingers around you in moments like these, makeup half-done and your bedsheets still rumpled from sleep, makes you hope that he might feel the same. maybe spending more time together is just what you need to figure it out.
“we can start tomorrow.” you agree.
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diversity december taglist: @raeinyourdreams @meetmypointlessaddiction @chubbyhedgehog @yxtkiwiyxt @isepod @dis-plus-fanfic-reblog-writes @deaky-with-a-c
latina reader: @naggywaggy @mami-veracruz @spencerswh0r3 @taextannie @gl1ndathegoodwitch @uncertified-doc
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storiesandthoughtsf1 · 17 hours ago
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It’s complicated pt. 2
Pairing: Lewis Hamilton x fIreader
Summary: You and Lewis are best friends and roommates. Okay maybe you're also a bit into each other, but you have a boyfriend, even though he's not exactly the nicest person.Everything was fine, but what will happen after you and Lewis let into your desires one night? And how will you deal with the morning after…?
Warnings: cheating technically, toxic boyfriend, mention of, age gap, both reader and lewis are a bit questionable, the boyfriend is outright toxic, some angst i guess, message me if I messed up anything, read at your own risk!
Word count: 3,9K
Author's note: sorry this took so long to finish! And yes Lewis or reader aren’t entirely innocent still. this is an emotional mess! Also please note english isn't my first language!
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In the morning you slowly woke up, dreams fading away, and opened your heavy eyelids. As you took in the scene, you realised that you weren’t in your own room. So you took up a hand to rub your eyes, feeling something wrap tighter around you at your movement. That was when you realised what had happened last night. All the memories flooding back, hitting you like a truck. The hurt from Connor standing you up, Lewis comforting you, the weird feeling you had felt as you stared into his eyes, almost like butterflies. But the thing that mattered the most. The pleasure. You had had sex with your best friend. And you had a boyfriend.
As you slowly realised the situation that you found yourself in, you had moved around a bit, which had seemed to wake the Brit beside you up. A small groan came from his way, which made your stomach do flips, though you mentally punched yourself for having that reaction. You were staring up at the ceiling when he opened his eyes, hands holding the duvet up to cover yourself. Lewis was about to place a kiss to your cheek, but that was when he noticed your facial expression. You looked lost, conflicted, which scared him in a way, as thoughts began circling his mind. Were you regretting last night? Had he just ruined his friendship with you?
He remembered Connor’s words yesterday that had annoyed him to no end. ‘Who in their late thirties would want to be best friends with a 26 year old and not want to bone her?’ He had said. A bit controversial yes, but being in the position that you found yourselves in now, Lewis felt like sinking into a hole. He wanted to be better than what Connor thought of him, actually he knew he was. But he knew how it seemed right now, as much as it wasn’t true.
Because the situation you found yourselves in now wasn’t due to Lewis wanting to blow off stream, no it was because he genuinely had feelings for you.
“You okay?” Lewis ended up asking, regretting his choice of words the second they spilled from his mouth, gently biting onto his lower lip to make sure he didn’t say anything stupid. Your eyes kept to the ceiling as you took a deep breath. “Yeah, I’m okay,” for the first time you turned your head towards the Brit, immediately catching onto his concerned state. To you he was an open book, and his emotions were easy to read. The constant wall he put up, something he had learned to do after many years of being a racing driver, may fool everyone else but it didn’t fool you. You saw right through it. At least you thought you saw it all.
“Do you want breakfast?” Lewis asked as he didn’t know what to say, and sighed in relief when you nodded with a smile. Almost falling off the bed and stumbling through the room, Lewis picked up a pair of sweatpants and threw them on before making his way out of the room. You chuckled a little at his awkward state, returning your eyes to the ceiling when he was out of sight. A gentle smile came to your lips as you reminisced the night before, biting onto your lip.
Sex had never felt as good, as it had with Lewis. Normally all Connor wanted was his own pleasure, which ended up in quickies where you didn’t even orgasm. It had been so long since you had felt this good, Lewis using every possible second to explore your body and focusing on your pleasure. You couldn’t lie, being with Lewis like that had felt so natural, so right. It made you forget about all your worries, the only thing that mattered had been being with him.
Slowly you got up from the bed, and looked across the room to find clothes to put on. Your jeans from yesterday were discarded in a corner along with your panties, while your shirt was nowhere to be seen. You didn’t really want to put some tight jeans on, so you went to Lewis’ closet, opening it up and looked inside. He had so much clothes, so you knew he wouldn’t mind if you borrowed some of it. After having looked through the closet for a while, letting your fingers brush over the endless amount of soft material, your eyes landed on a specific t-shirt. It was a shirt that you knew he loved, so you instantly grabbed it, and took a pair of his loose boxers along with you and pulled it on. Catching yourself in the mirror, you couldn’t help but smile to yourself, feeling weirdly comfortable in your best friend’s clothes. The scent of him filled the pieces of clothing, a scent you found calming.
Slowly you made your way downstairs, where you found the person who was circling your mind standing in the kitchen flipping an omelette. All types of fruits and berries were laid out on two separate places, and two glasses of orange juice as well. You couldn’t help but smile at the gesture, leaning against the doorframe to the kitchen. Roscoe barked at your arrival, which made Lewis look up and noticed you smiling at him from across the room.
“Since when do you make such a fancy breakfast?” You chuckled a little, seeing the Brit shake his head with a giggle.
Seeing him stand shirtless in the kitchen, cooking both of you breakfast made you feel a way you couldn’t quite describe. Your stomach turned in a thrilling feeling, heart pumping faster. Yet the new and strong feeling didn’t scare you, it actually lured you in even more. It was like you were seeing the man before you for the first time. In a completely different light. He was almost shining, the sweet smile on his lips making your heart twist. “Since now I guess,” Lewis’ words brought you back from your thoughts, making your smile grow wider as you walked around the kitchen island to stand beside him.
Lewis felt his heart pick up its speed at the feeling of you suddenly being so close to him, curiously looking at what he was making. But he tried to suppress the feelings that erupted him, focusing on the vegan omelette before him. Cheekily you grabbed a couple of blueberries from one of the plates and ate them before Lewis could say anything.
“Wow, can’t you wait two minutes?” He tried to keep an annoyed tone, but in reality he just felt like kissing you. Yesterday had really screwed with his mind, and at this point he didn’t know where you were standing as a pair. Were you just friends? Were you more? Only god knew how much Lewis would give to be more than friends, but he knew better than to ruin your relationship with your boyfriend. Or at least he thought he did, because finding himself in the situation he was in right now, he realised he had ended up messing with some things he probably shouldn’t have.
It didn’t take long before the two of you were sat at the table eating your breakfast together. It had been silent for a while, both of you just focusing on your food, when Lewis felt the need to break the silence.
“Can I ask you a question?” He asked rather shyly, which caught you off guard, connecting your eyes to his. “Yes of course,” you assured him, putting your fork down to show him, he had your attention. Lewis took a deep breath, mind wandering a hundred miles per second as he tried to figure out what to say and how. He knew how he felt, but he didn’t know how to start the conversation he wanted to have.
“About yesterday-“ Lewis just got to mumble out before there was a firm knock on the front door. Lewis felt his confidence crumble down, words disappearing from his vocabulary as his mind shut down. “I’m sorry, I’ll go check who it is,” you assured him, thinking that if he was left to himself for awhile, then he would figure out what to say, as you found it quite obvious he didn’t know how to explain himself. You of course knew what he wanted to talk about, and to be honest you understood why he found it hard having that conversation. You wanted to have it too, but you didn’t know what to say.
You didn’t know what to feel.
Soon you opened the door, and your heart skipped a beat as you saw your boyfriend stand in front of you, a weak smile on his lips. His hands were in his pockets, a thing he only did when he wanted to apologise to you for something, which happened more often than you would like to admit.
“Hey,” he smiled at you affectionately, his cheeks seeming to have a reddish colour, but you didn’t know if it was the cold weather or something else that had caused it.
“Hi,” you responded as you felt your heart speed up, the need for air suddenly getting bigger. Sweat was beginning to form in your palms, at the same time as tears came to your eyes. It was obvious you were panicking, or at least to you, and Connor could see something was wrong as well.
“Look, I’m sorry about yesterday, I shouldn’t have been such an asshole,” he apologised rather genuinely, which made your heart drop. Here he was apologising to you, and you had cheated on him. Not just a kiss, not a make out, no you had had sex with another man. And it had felt good. You suddenly became very aware of the fact that you were in Lewis’ clothes, and you dragged the t-shirt further down to cover up the obvious fact that you did not own male boxers.
“I know you’re very close with Lewis and you share clothes for whatever reason,” Connor pointed to you, which made you stop dragging down the shirt, realising that he had seen. “But I trust you, and I love you, so when you say he’s just your best friend, well then I believe you. I’m sorry for acting the way I did, it was irresponsible of me.”
A tear escaped your eye before you could do anything about it, and Connor watched as you fought not to break down in front of him. But he must have thought that you cried for a different reason than you did, because he pulled you in for a hug, letting his hand rub up and down your back. You moved your head around, trying to breathe properly, as being in his arms didn’t feel like it should. Though you convinced yourself you were overreacting, and that you loved him back. When Connor pulled away, he placed a tender kiss on your lips, but again you felt like something was missing. Something about the way he kissed you was off, there was something wrong in the way you felt.
“Can I come inside?” You couldn’t do anything but nod at his question in pure fright of him realising something was up.
Lewis couldn’t hear the conversation that was held out at the front of the house, and to be honest he used his time alone to figure out what to say to you. So when he suddenly heard footsteps coming back inside, he was almost ready to ingulf you in a hug as soon as you walked through the door, but when he looked up, he saw none other than Connor following you into the room. To Lewis’ surprise the younger man waved at him with a friendly smile, his arm around your waist. Though your expression was different to your boyfriend’s. You looked lost, at the same time as looking like you were on the edge of having a panic attack. Couldn’t Connor see that?
“Hey Lewis, I just wanted to say something to you quick,” Connor sat down in the seat beside Lewis, for some reason not caring about the fact that Lewis was without shirt, or surely looked like someone who was about to pass out. “I’m sorry for being such a dick towards you, I’ve just had trouble with the fact that you, a Formula 1 star live with my girlfriend,” he explained himself in such a calm way, that made Lewis feel guilty. This was a new side of Connor for sure, but he seemed genuine. He seemed to care about what he was saying. “I guess I’ve been jealous, but that’s over now, I promise.”
At that sentence, your and Lewis’ eyes locked together, silent panic seen in both, as you knew you were screwed.
Connor stayed for longer than you would have wanted, just talking to the two of you as you ate breakfast. Lewis had offered to make an omelette for Connor, as he wanted to get away from the situation, but the younger man had told him that he had already ate breakfast, which left Lewis trapped in the room. You looked even more uncomfortable than himself, which made Lewis feel bad, as he thought it was his own fault that this was going on. If he had just controlled himself, you wouldn’t be in this uncomfortable situation. You would be happy to be with your boyfriend. But now he had ruined it, he had ruined your relationship with your boyfriend in what he thought was a purely selfish manner.
But it was soon time for Connor to leave again, so you walked with him towards the entrance of the house.
“It means a lot to me that you’ve forgiven me,” Connor breaks the silence as the first one, giving you a smile. But that comment made you furrow your brows. Had you actually forgiven him? The pain from last evening was still heavy in your heart. It was one piece of many, from all the times he had lashed out at you, or straight up ignored you to prove a point. You didn’t want to do that anymore. “Connor, look, I haven’t forgiven you yet, but I do really appreciate the apology. Just please give me some time.” You gave him a sympathetic smile, hoping that this new and improved man before you would understand. Actually, you were convinced he would, because after his little speech earlier it sounded exactly like what he was planning to do.
“What, why?” He seemed confused his wall of defence high as he spoke loudly, and it made you take a step back. Your heart beating quicker. You thought of the best way to phrase yourself, taking a deep breath. “It’s not just last night Connor, so I’m gonna need some time. But if you really do change, then we’ll be good.” You still spoke in a soft tone, really trying to do your best to seem bearing and sincere.
Connor scoffed loudly at your response. “Oh come on, are you seriously bringing up the past now? I thought we were moving forward! I apologised, didn’t I?” His voice was filled with anger now, and it made you feel small. This was the Connor you couldn’t love anymore, the guy you wanted to be done with. The guy he swore he had changed away from.
“Yes you apologised for that one thing, but if you can’t see there’s more to this than yesterday then I seriously don’t know how to explain it to you.” You snapped back at him, but your voice was still not that loud. In your mind you wanted to shout, to scream at him actually. But you couldn’t bring yourself to do it, and it wasn’t out of love you realised. It was out of fear. Of what he could do then.
“Oh so this is just a guilt trip huh?” He almost mocked you, taking a step closer to you. You felt yourself take another step away without even thinking of it, trying to gather your thoughts. But he spoke up before you could muster out a reply. “Typical. You’re acting like I’m the worst guy ever just because I messed up once.”
You couldn’t stand there and take it anymore, because what he was saying was truly insane to you. It was as if you had been living separate lives, experienced separate situations. “It’s not just once Connor. And the fact you think it is… that’s the problem.” You finally got out, not even looking at him anymore, but instead just straight ahead. It was like you realised it yourself now.
There was nothing left about this relationship to save.
There hadn’t been anything to save in a long time, but you had kept making excuses. Making excuses for him. Allowed him to walk all over you, mistreat you. But you didn’t want that anymore. No, you weren’t gonna allow him to be that way. You were done.
“Oh I get it now. This is about him.” Connor suddenly spoke, bringing you back to reality. You were speechless, but you knew your confused look told him everything he needed to know. “Lewis. It’s always about Lewis, isn’t it? You fucking live with the guy, you probably run to him every time we fight. Don’t you dare tell me he hasn’t been in your ear about how much of a ‘toxic asshole’ I am.” He spoke with venom, pointing a finger at you as if it would make his point clearer.
That was it for you. The glass had fully shattered, and any feelings whatsoever you had ever had for him were gone. The person who stood before you was a fucking bully, and you needed him out of your house.
“The fact you go back to that shows you aren’t gonna change. This has never been about Lewis, it’s been about you and me, Connor.” You were clearly annoyed now as well, but you didn’t let your emotions get the best of you. You tried your very best to stay calm, to keep the upper hand.
Connor laughed. “Right. Because it’s totally normal for your best friend to be a guy who’s practically your boyfriend without the title. You think I don’t notice how he looks at you? Or how you always talk about how ‘great’ he is?” The sarcasm spilled from his lips as he spoke. He apparently thought he was hilarious for that comment, but you kept standing still, your face unreadable.
“You’ve told me all I need to know. I can’t keep picking this fight, and I won’t be doing it either. Cause we’re done.” You spoke clearly, crossing your arms as you gave him a stern look. Watching how calm you kept under this argument only made him more furious.
“So what, you’re just giving up on us? After everything?” He asked mockingly, but it wasn’t like he was surprised it was over. It more seemed like he was mad you were the one to say it. “No I’m finally choosing myself.” You clarified, taking a few steps towards him, which made him back out of the door. “Goodbye.” You said, and just like that you smacked the door in his face.
Walking back into the house you saw Lewis in the exact same place you had left him, the dining room table. His look on his face told you everything you needed to know. “Hey… you okay?” He spoke up finally as you just stood there in the room, looking a bit lost. You sighed heavily, forcing yourself to nod. No that break up hadn’t been a pretty sight, but it was finally over. And that meant you actually were alright. Or at least you would be.
“I broke up with him.” You said, finally looking over at Lewis properly, catching his gaze on you. He nodded at your words. “Yeah, I heard.” He admitted, but it wasn’t like it was a surprise to you. Of course he had heard. You knew that. You just let out a small chuckle, as did he, and you took a few steps towards him, but didn’t sit down at the table. You felt like you still had to take what just had happened in.
Suddenly Lewis got up from his seat, and walked towards you. Without even thinking of it, he took your hands in his, and looked you deep in your eyes. Just for a second you watched your hands in his, before looking up to meet his eyes. Those big brown eyes. “You did the right thing. You deserve someone who treats you the way you deserve to be treated.” He admitted, his voice full of love.
You took a moment before you answered. “Yeah? And what do I deserve?” Right now you felt a bit lost, so you genuinely couldn’t tell what you exactly deserved.
Lewis took a deep breath before he spoke again. “You deserve someone who really sees you. Someone who listens to you, supports you, and makes you feel like you’re enough every single day. You deserve someone who…” he trailed off, his voice suddenly shakier than before. It made you furrow your brows ever so slightly, because Lewis never got nervous like that. Yet you still couldn’t help but smile, his words so kind and gentle they made you want to hug him as tightly as you could. Lewis took a deep breath before he spoke up again “Someone who loves you. The way I do.”
You felt your heart skip a beat at his confession. All you could do was blink at him, not knowing how to respond.
“Lewis,” you spoke softly. His confession was huge. It made you feel magical. You could barely contain yourself, it felt like, your heart beating so fast it could leap out of your chest.
“I know it’s a lot. And I don’t want to make this harder for you. I just… I couldn’t not say it. Not after last night. Not after how I heard him speak to you just now.” His words rolled off his tongue quickly, almost like in an endless stream of mumbling. You had never seen Lewis this nervous before. You desperately wanted to respond, you really did, but you felt taken aback by his confession. Your mind was screaming at you to tell him you felt the same way, but nothing came out.
It seemed like Lewis had somehow read your mind, because he spoke up again. “You don’t have to respond. I just wanted you to know.”
But that made you find your voice again. “Lewis, I love you too.” You said, the feeling that bubbled in your chest as you said it just felt right. So right you knew this is exactly what you had been searching for your entire life.
“Yeah?” A big smile slowly appeared on Lewis’ face at your confession. You nodded eagerly. “Yeah.”
You couldn’t even tell who leaned in first. Maybe you didn’t even care. What mattered was that your lips met, in a soft and gentle motion. But that quickly turned more passionate, Lewis hands wrapping around your waist and yours around his neck. You needed each other as close as you possibly could, desperate to taste the other. You couldn’t get yourselves to break away from the kiss, but eventually you needed air. With his forehead resting against yours, Lewis whispered: “I’m never letting you go.”
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helen-with-an-a · 23 hours ago
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Any chance of some beautiful girl head canons of Ale and amor playing against each other for their national teams?
Beautiful Girl Masterlist
Ok so, I've touched on it before, but here's some more stuff, right. I have officially made Amor English (it was easier for me for her to have a nationality, but I'm going to try to keep it as broad and open as possible for people)
Amor is VC behind Leah and actually captained the team during the WC 2023. (And Amor is 3rd Captain at Barça too)
Amor is a defensive midfielder (usually plays in the 7 or 8 role, sitting in the middle with Keira and Georgia, but can play out on the wings if needed), and so if Spain and England ever meet, she's usually battling it out with Alexia which definitely hurts both of them
But the teams know how painful it is for them. Keira, Georgia and Grace Clinton definitely step in to cover them slightly. And Patri, Aitana and the other midfielders (certainly to Barça players) step up too. But at the end of the day, they are professional on the pitch; that is not Mi Amor and Beautiful Girl; that is the English/Spanish midfielder they need to defend.
However, as soon as confirmation is made that they will be playing each other, there is always a conversation about their initial thoughts and feelings. There are usually a lot of reassurances that the outcomes will not affect their feelings (it's generally more Amor comforting Ale rather than the other way round).
Just before they leave for camp (assuming it's not a tournament), there's definitely another conversation (probably the night before they go), and it usually ends in fluffy sex (but probably one and done; they don't want to tire themselves out, etc).
If they are going to a tournament, and they aren't sure if they will face each other, it's normally more of a "good luck, you'll do really well, I believe in you, I love you" type conversation, and then they have a phone call (or meet in person if they can) if they will play each other in knock out stages.
After the matches, they literally go and hunt each other out and just hug. For a good 2 minutes, and just stand there hugging as everyone goes about their day. Afterwards, they literally split off to their team huddles and then go back to each other and hold hands and go round thanking the fans and stuff together.
Fans go crazy for it; they love that Amor can bring out the slightly less professional side of Ale after matches. They keep wanting demanding more international matches (friendly or not ahaha).
Some really confused people for English fans don't know much about Ale or watch Barça, but they love how soft their ray of sunshine gets around her gf. Amor is just so happy and bubbly all the time that it's nice to see her calm down a little and just let herself breathe.
Coming back from camp where they've played each other is always fun. There's always reunion sex, but then, depending on each other's mindset, it's definitely either soft, cuddly, gentle fluffiness or Soft Dom R getting Ale back to her normal self.
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ang3lmoans · 3 days ago
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Angel couldn't tell what the man was thinking. His eyes seemed to shift as Garam pressed his thumb into his bottom lip. Angel felt a calmness come over him. Something he hadn't felt in a while. The way his best friend was looking at him it quickened his heartbeat. Garam was always beautiful to him. But to see him lying in his bed caressing his face was driving Angel wild. He lowered himself further to brush their noses together. The thing was he was furthest from angry. His stomach had butterflies. This moment with Garam was everything. Angel’s eyes slipped closed as the man’s fingers moved over his face. Letting out a long breath they opened once more. Not being much for words Garam filled the space. Kissing him and demanding he be kissed until Angel wasn't angry. He thought about telling his best friend the truth. But he was tired of always doing the right thing. Where had it gotten him? Years of heartache and longing. Before he could fulfill the request Garan surprised him by kissing him. A smirk spread as he leaned down kissing Garam full on this time. Not ready to go further didn't mean he didn't want to. Angel cared for Garam deeply on many levels. But he was still human and often pictured the other man moaning his name. Praying to hear what it would sound like. A hum escaped into their kiss as he fought his mind and body. It had been a while since he probably kissed someone. Pressing their tongue against Garam’s lips begging for entrance. He now shifted to fully lay beside Garam. His arms scooped under the other man and hugged him close. A piece of Angel wanted to be cautious. Pushing himself too far would end in a disaster. But pushing Garam too far would haunt him. At the end of the day, Garam was still drunk. Angel typically never touched anyone under the influence. However, Garam was bring too enticing to turn down. His mouth moved slowly wanting to savor every taste he was granted. One hand pressed firmly into his back while the other was locked around his waist. Garam smelled as good as he looked, mixed with beer and tacos. Angel did his best not to laugh. This was not how he saw their first kiss going. The first kiss was to show his best friend that he had nothing to worry about. Hoping it would shock the man enough to go to sleep. But him practically begging for more was exactly what Angel liked. He loved being desired. Something that her man would learn when they were both ready. After a bit, he broke their kiss slowly. Angel licked his lips to break the trail of saliva connecting their lips. “Mi amor, es hora de ir a la cama,” Angel whispered as he pecked Garam’s lips once more. The words were meant to be in English but he was in a haze starting to feel the exhaustion. He began to rub the man's back hoping to coach him to sleep.
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garam frowned slightly when angel brought up talking again once he was sober, as if he thought garam would change his mind or regret what he said. he knew he wouldn't, this was what he wanted and he needed angel to understand that. regardless of his sobriety, garam knew that angel was the right choice. he'd always been there, he was who garam felt the safest and most comfortable with. not once had garam suspected any ill intentions with the choices angel made in any aspect of their relationship. but as much as he knew this, garam kept his mouth shut, fearing another argument to arise. it only took a brief moment for garam to turn his head to look at angel. the kiss on his cheek was something so innocent, most probably would have seen it as a more insignificant act, but it was enough of a convincer to abide angel's request. just when the other had done something so unsuspecting, he'd done the unthinkable; an actual kiss... on the lips? garam was caught so off guard that he froze completely still, only allowing his lips to move in synch with the man hovering above him and that was only after it registered to him what was happening. the last thing he was expecting from angel was a kiss, he didn't think the man wanted any sort of non-platonic physical contact from garam after all that was said tonight. once the two had parted, he pulled his hand out from underneath the blanket and lifted it up to meet with angel's cheek. his thumb slowly caressed over the other's cheekbone before his hand moved downward, allowing his forefinger to trail down the length of angel's jaw. "no rest," he whispered in protest, shaking his head. "you can't go to sleep if you're still mad at me, i won't let you." garam began to smile once his fingers were at angel's lips, all he could think about was how enticing angel would look on his knees with his lips wrapped around garam's— no, he couldn't think about that. garam knew better, regardless of his state of intoxication, to think that anything beyond what was already done would happen. he, himself, didn't want something to happen tonight. not when he wasn't completely sober, not when there was a chance he wouldn't remember half of it. and then there was the fact that angel had kissed another man only a matter of hours ago. garam shuttered a breath, his thump pressed against the other's lower lip gently, as if it were begging entrance into angel's mouth, before letting it go. "if you're still mad, you have to kiss me again..." he blurted out. maybe that was a more selfish request, as if he was the only one benefiting from the request, as it was something garam thought he wanted more than angel would but considering angel kissed him first, it was clear that kissing was something angel was okay with. garam swiftly push himself up, closing the gap between them, enough to press his lips against angel's. when he let himself drop back down to the bed, his hand followed suit, resting on his stomach on top of the blanket now. "you have to kiss me until you're okay with me again." garam pursed his lips excessively, closing his eyes as well; an act done as an invitation for angel to kiss him again.
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kawoala · 3 days ago
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DRIVEN BY ADRENALINE suna rintarou. chapter 003 ; mcdonalds.
< previous ; masterlist ; next >
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২ 𓂅 ࣪ ೨ ; 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓 (757)
২ 𓂅 ࣪ ೨ ; 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆 (filler chapter, short but sweet, only child! reader, a little angsty in regards to reader beung an only child, just backstory on reader + runa family, profanity, mcdonalds)
a/n: i dont do authors notes, and i probs wont do this again, but i wanted to wish all those who celebrate a very merry christmas !! i hope you eat yummy food and have a great time with your family !
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When you get a text from Runa asking to join her for lunch, of course you say yes. It’s your fourth day here and you still haven’t made a peep to any of your classmates. Runa’s kind of the only person you know at university.
You meet her in front of your dorm building and the ride to Mcdonald’s isn’t too long. Apparently, they built this Mcdonald’s last year purely because it’s around a bunch of broke college kids.
Runa orders first and you order the same thing. Who knew you two were so similar? You sit down and, for the first few minutes, you’re both quiet.
Runa breaks the silence first by asking about your family.
“Oh, I’m an only child,” you say with a shrug. “My parents are also both only children, so I don’t really have a big family or anything. I only have a few cousins who are much, much older than me. Courtesy of my great aunts and uncles.” You shrug again and pop a fry in your mouth. “Um, my mom is a pediatrician, so she was never really home, and my dad works for the local newspaper.”
She nods along as you speak, watching you intently. Once you finish, she hums. “That’s too bad. Growing up without a lot of family, I mean.” She frowns slightly. “Your dad is a newspaper guy, though, is that why you want to teach English when you get older?”
“Um,” You think for a moment. “Maybe? I don’t know. I’ve just always been good at English.” You pause, then shake your head. “What about you? What’s your family like?”
Her eyes widen and she suddenly smiles widely. “Oh, I have a huge family. I have three brothers and one sister. I’m the oldest, which,” she rolls her eyes, “sucks, by the way. My mom passed away when I was little, but my dad works for a car company. Not selling them, building them. He’s, like, a genius. That’s why I got into cars. I’m assuming Rin told you about Atsumu’s dad’s car?” When you nod, she nods as well. “Yeah, they were always working on that stupid car. It was, like, twenty years old, but it was cool as fuck.”
You nod, taking a bite of your burger. “That sounds awesome. When I was younger I used to be super jealous of other kids with siblings. My house was always quiet, so I used to turn all the TV’s on and pretend that there were people in the house.” You laugh at the memory, but when you look at Runa, she’s frowning once again. “It’s okay, though,” you try to backtrack. “I liked my privacy, too. I never had to share a room, there was always hot water to shower with, never had to deal with siblings chasing after me with a knife or something.” You snicker and shrug again.
She stays quiet for a long moment. The two of you sit in silence again, just eating your food.
Eventually, you clear your throat. “So, um, what do you do for fun? You mentioned being a manager for your high school’s volleyball team, but what do you like to do now?” You raise your brows inquisitively. “Oh, what are you majoring in?”
“Communications,” she answers quickly. The sudden smile on her face almost makes you giggle. She sure does change emotions rather quickly. “I want to do something to do with public relations, maybe? I don’t know. When I was a manager I felt like I was doing something that fit, you know? So I’m thinking of becoming a PR manager for a sports team or something. Volleyball or maybe soccer.” She shrugs.
“That makes sense.” You nod. “I think you’d be good at marketing, too. You’re very…” you trail off, thinking. “Persuasive.”
She laughs and shakes her head. “I just talk a lot.”
You laugh, too, and look back down at your food. It’s nearly gone, but you don’t think you can finish it. “Do you want the rest of my fries?” You ask.
“Um, yeah, obviously.”
As you laugh once more and hand her the french fries, you can’t help but think that Runa is going to be a good friend. She’s funny and nice and she included you in something dear to her the first day you met her.
You go to sleep that night with a smile on your face for the first time in a while. Similarly, for the first time, you’re excited to wake up with Runa tomorrow.
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২ 𓂅 ࣪ ೨ ; 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓
@sahrii , @cherrysurf , @heartmaddie , @jpegarchives , @massacremars
@vertejay , @tiramizuloz , @gumims , @mybelovedvi , @chaotic-neutral-ig
@usbrous , @iheartamora , @iluv-ace , @xavlyzn , @velvetreds
@mysticstrawberryballoon , @h0n3y-l3m0n05 , @aethersluvrr , @smiithys
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trainer-from-unova · 1 day ago
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day on the green
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𖤐 bandom blog: @princess-lvcifer 𖤐 english ao3 𖤐 spanish ao3 𖤐 edits 𖤐 kofi 𖤐 𝄞 𖤐
ship: eddie munson x f!reader
summary: you travel with your best friend through the country to go to a metal festival in San Francisco with him
a/n: lots of metallica references as usual / i wrote this in summer 2022 / english isn't my first language, sorry if something's weird expressed
cw: fluff, best friends to lovers, sexual and romantic tension, sexual humor, affectionate insults
word count: 12'1k
"______, Eddie's calling," said her mother, entering her room without knocking or asking permission. She was listening to Metallica at full volume and knew she probably wasn't going to hear her.
"I'm coming," she said dropping the magazine she was reading, leaving it at the foot of his bed and getting up from it to go downstairs to where the house phone was. "Hey, what's up?" She wanted to hold back the urge to smile like the lovesick fool she was, since her mother was circling the house like a shark, and she didn't want her to know she liked him, not because she was ashamed of him or because her mother thought he was a bad influence — on the contrary, she and Eddie got along well, she didn't see him as a bad guy, but who would want her mother to know which boy she liked? And on top of that he was a close friend who often went to her house.
"Are you at home?" he asked nervously.
"Can't you see I am, asshole?" She asked now. "What's wrong?"
"Okay, don't move from there, I'm on my way," he said, and hung up.
"You fucking asshole," she whispered to herself, she hated being left wondering, she was worried, but knowing Eddie it wouldn't be serious. The most serious thing that could happen was that he'd get caught smoking or selling weed.
She didn't hear Eddie park his van in front of her house because her music was on full blast, but if it wasn't for that, she would have heard him. She had good hearing and recognised the noise made by the engines of his loved ones' cars. She could also recognise the sound of keys or footsteps as they walked.
What she did hear was the doorbell of the house in the distance. She got out of bed and turned the music down, it was obvious that Eddie was there to tell her something, although she had no idea what, but she'd better be able to hear it loud and clear, she'd listen to her favourite songs loud and clear at any other time.
The door to her room was open, so he didn't ask permission to enter. He was practically at his houss, but he did leave it ajar when he entered.
"What is it?" She asked indignantly as she sat cross-legged on her bed. "You've got me fucking intrigued!"
"Boom," he said, raising his right hand, in which he held a pamphlet. She could clearly see names of rock and metal bands she knew: Scorpions, Ratt, Y&T, Metallica, Rising Force, Victory.... Though his eyes went to her favourite band, Metallica, hardly paying attention to the others, as she didn't care that much about them.
Eddie took off his shoes and sat down on her bed, facing her, also with his legs crossed.
"It's this year's Day on the Green," he said, handing her the sheet, "Saturday 31 August. The next day it's Wham! and some other pop bands I obviously don't want to see. I've always wanted to go. We have to go, I won't take no for an answer."
"18'50$... It's expensive, and in Oakland! How are we going to get there, if we go at all?"
"But it's worth the price! And we can go by bus, or by plane, or in my caravan... Yeah, I think my caravan would be better. Think about it, you and me, travelling around the country in a caravan, listening to our favourite songs and shouting them out, and then listening to them played live by their creators and together with more fans..." He couldn't fit the smile on his face and his eyes were shining, it was adorable when he looked so excited, you could tell he liked what he was talking about. "It's a great plan, you can't say no," he said pointing his right hand with his index finger.
It was true, it was a great plan and she couldn't say no to him. And she really wanted to live such a unique experience with him, and alone, but the money issue put her off, and she didn't know what her mother would say about it.
"And on top of that, it's the summer holidays, you can't give me the excuse of school."
"Yes, but the money and my mother..."
"Don't worry about the money, you know..." He whispered.
Yes, it was true, he was loaded from selling weed, but it was bad for her to accept that he paid her entrance fee and everything, and that he drove and paid for the petrol.
"Even though you're failing all your science subjects, you're a good girl, I'm sure she'll let you have a whim like that. And I'm sure she doesn't think too badly of me, does she?"
"I hope so... But before we say anything, we should organise it a bit, so that she sees that we're not going on a wild adventure, that we're organised, and get her in a good mood."
"I see the logic of it, but it has to be as soon as possible, tickets may fly."
"Then let's get down to work. We must go to the library to consult maps and their routes."
That's what they did. They worked out how long the trip would take to get there and back, when they would have to leave Hawkins and when they would be back, motels to spend the night in, gas stations, how much money each of them would have to take with them to pay for expenses, how much the whole trip would cost, and a little emotional and psychological blackmail to use on _______'s mother if needed.
The next day, she let her mother know that Eddie would be going to dinner in the evening and that they wanted to tell her something important. The second she thought they wanted to tell her that they had been together for a long time or even worse, like a pregnancy, but she cleared her worries by telling her it was nothing of the sort.
"I want you here at six o'clock sharp. Get ready," she told him as she got out of Eddie's caravan in front of her house. Her house was between the school and his house, so he was her taxi driver.
"I know, I know."
"Isn't he coming in yet?" asked her mother when she saw her walk in the front door alone.
"No, he's going home to get ready," she said as she made her way to the stairs and took her backpack off her shoulders, "or did you want him to get ready here?"
"What should I make him for dinner?"
"Whatever you want, he'll eat it all pleased," she said on the first floor.
Hours passed and the doorbell rang. It was time. Luckily, he had been on time. For what he wanted to do, he was, but not for his early morning classes at school.
Eddie wasn't that uncomfortable, because he already knew the mother of his best and only female friend, but she had told him that her mother saw him as a possible boyfriend, so he knew what was going through her mind when she saw him with her daughter (the same thing happened with some people at school), and that made him ashamed, because on top of that, at least on his part, he did feel something for _______, something more than friendship.
And well, besides, it was the first time he had dinner and spent so much time with her mother, and of course, there was also the main plan, the mission they had to achieve: to convince her to let her go with him on a trip around the country and go to that metal festival. Technically she didn't need her permission, since she was already 18, but being a woman and still living under her roof, for things like that it was better to have her approval.
"Well, what is it that you wanted to tell me? Intrigue kills me," said her mother, as the three of them sat down at the table.
"Like mother, like daughter," he thought.
"Well, mom, as you know, I love metal, and so does he. It's a music that has helped me a lot in many ways for a long time, and so has Eddie, even though we've known each other for half a year. There's going to be a festival in Oakland on Saturday the 31st of August and we'd really like to go. We've thought about going in his caravan, both of us driving every couple of hours. Also, because of the proximity, we'd like to visit San Francisco and Los Angeles for at least a day, and we'd come back through the south, through the Bible Belt. He has insisted on paying for everything but I have told him no, I could pull from my savings or start working a bit. We've also looked at routes and motels to sleep in, and if anything should happen to the car Eddie is a good mechanic and has all the necessary equipment. I would call you every time we stopped at a place with a phone box. And I think I deserve to go to the festival, plus it's something that would make me very happy and travelling around the country in a car would be an experience..."
"And of course I would look after her in every way, you don't have to worry about anything," he said as seriously as she did.
"Of course, of course," she pointed her index finger at him, giving him a quick glance and a quick nod.
She looked at each of them and a smirk appeared on her face. They were both already fearing the worst.
"All this to ask me to take you on a trip and go to a concert?" she asked incredulously while holding back her laughter.
"...Yes?"
"For God's sake, you don't need to worry so much, you're both old enough to ask my permission. Besides, I can't wait for you to see the world and get wise," she said looking only at her daughter.
"So, ma'am, does that mean yes?" asked Eddie.
"Of course it does," she replied, and they both looked at each other smiling from ear to ear and high-fived.
She looked at them tenderly. It was obvious to her that they were both in love with each other.
Time passed ridiculously slowly.
During the months of waiting before the festival began, Eddie slightly increased the prices of the weed he sold, and started giving private guitar lessons to kids in town to earn a little extra and to disguise where he was getting the money to afford the trip. Meanwhile, she started giving drawing, English and Spanish classes to other kids.
On the first day of May Live Aid was announced, but despite being closer than Oakland, as it would be held in Philadelphia and would be no more than a day's drive (not counting the return trip), it was too expensive. 35$ each ticket. The price was understandable, as the event was going to be an unprecedented spectacle, where many people would be working for a good cause, but they already had enough expenses with what the Day on the Green tickets cost and the trip they would be making. Besides, even if they didn't go to the festival, raising so much money in such a short time was quite difficult, as Live Aid would be on 13th July, and tickets flew quickly, and rightly so, seeing the list of artists who were going to attend to help the cause.
Anyway, they watched Live Aid together on TV and that made them want to go to Day on the Green even more.
And finally the day came for them to go on the trip. She'd be lying if she said she wasn't climbing the walls like Spiderman herself because she was so nervous. She had never left Indiana, she had never made such a long trip, both in terms of distance and days, and she had never been separated from her mother for such a long time. But at least she was going to experience all that with her best friend and the boy she was in love with.
She had been ready since the day before and had gone through her luggage four times, and was about to do it for the fifth time, when a clack sounded outside her house. It was him, no doubt about it. She almost had a heart attack. It was time to go.
She left the house with the luggage and she and her mother pretended to put the things in the caravan, but he got off them and insisted on doing it himself.
As it was almost the end of August, and it was so hot, he was wearing no shirt and shorts. Both young friends were embarrassed for her mother to see him like that, but it was an understandable outfit because of the heat.
She hugged her mother goodbye and told her that she loved her very much. As the mother she was, she could feel her nervousness.
"Don't worry about anything, silly, you'll have a great time, you'll see," her mother whispered in her ear as they hugged.
"I know, but..."
"Before you go, I have to take a picture of you!" said her mother as they parted, "Come on, get together."
Eddie put his arm around ______'s shoulders and pulled her close to him, resting his head on hers, and she posed, making a peace sign with one of her hands. He made a devil sign with his free hand.
Her mother took the camera off her neck and handed it to her, they got into the car, both waved goodbye to her mother and Eddie drove off.
"I CAN'T WAIT!" he shouted.
"Same," she said, laughing a little nervously.
"Well, it doesn't look like it from you," he said, looking at her strangely, "what's wrong?"
"It's nerves, don't worry."
"Nerves about what?"
"To make such a trip, to be so far away from my home and my mother for so long, my comfort zone."
"I mean, it would fuck me up at this point, but if you don't want to go, there's still time for me to turn back..."
"What the fuck are you talking about?! No way, of course I want to go on the trip and to the festival, and I've got you on top of that. I wouldn't do this madness with just anyone."
"Do you consider going on a trip and to a festival a crazy thing?" he asked with a mocking smile.
"No, but yes, if it's that far away..."
"As long as you don't tell me to turn around when we're in Nebraska or something like that, it's all right," he said jokingly.
"You know I won't."
On the way they listened and sang along to the cassettes he had, and she brought her own too, so they wouldn't always be alone listening to his.
It was around lunchtime and Eddie had already been driving for a couple of hours, so they stopped to rest and eat.
"Wait, I have to put sunscreen on again," she said before getting back in the car. She had just finished talking to her mother on the phone. She had little to say to her, evidently.
"Really? That's a scam, it's not necessary."
"You're telling me you've been driving around shirtless in the sun for hours without sunscreen?"
"Of course I am."
"You're going to burn, you idiot!"
"No way, you exaggerator."
"Put it," she said, offering the bottle of sunscreen.
"No," she said with disgust.
She poured cream into her free hand, moved closer to him and directed her cream-filled hand to his collarbone, rubbing her hand over it, and trying not to look at his tattooed chest or his tablet, making a superhuman effort not to let her eyes wander to those areas of his body. That took him by surprise, but he kept still and quiet, accepting the gesture.
"Dampen down a little," she asked as she rubbed cream back into her hand, looking up, meeting his eyes. "Do you see how necessary this is?" She asked as she creamed his left cheek, inches from each other. "You're already red."
He was sure he wasn't red from the sun, but he shut up.
"Turn around," she asked again, and he again obeyed.
For a second she stared at his back. She thought is was beautiful and couldn't believe she was about to run hee hands over it. She pushed his hair forward with her little finger so as not to get even a little cream in it.
"Don't you want to put your hair in a high ponytail or a bun?" She asked as she ran her hand down his back. "You'd be cooler."
"I look ridiculous."
"I'm sure you wouldn't. Besides, what difference does it make if I see you like that?"
"A lot," he thought, "you're the only person whose opinion really matters to me."
When he noticed she was done, he turned and she offered him the bottle of sunscreen again. His arms, legs and torso remained. It was understandable, she wasn't going to rub it all over him, he was too old to follow and it would be very uncomfortable in many ways, especially touching his torso, although they both wanted to.
When he finished applying the cream, he gave her back the pot and hugged her tightly.
"You idiot, you're going to stain me and you're sweaty! Ugh!" and he laughed wickedly.
"Do you want me to help you lie on your back?" he asked as he let her out of his grip.
She was wearing shorts and a crop top.
"Okay," she said as she turned around. She didn't need to, she could do it on her own, but she wasn't going to refuse help, especially if it was about him touching her.
Eddie put cream on his right hand and directed his hand to her back. He was nervous, more so than he had been before, when she was creaming him. He didn't know how to touch her, but he knew he had to act normal, so he rubbed his hand across the uncovered part of her back with the mission to get the sticky cream off his hand as quickly as possible. He tried not to look too closely at her back, and his fingertips ended up inside her crop top, unintentionally brushing her bra for a second. Then he slid his hand down her right side to remove what little cream he had left, stopping when he brushed against her trousers. She loved the feel of his hand right then, in that place, like that, even though it probably wasn't a big deal and she was making a movie in her head. Then he pushed her hair forward and decided to rub cream on her neck, massaging it lightly.
"Thank you," she said.
"You're welcome."
He got into the car, in the passenger seat, where she was before, and she quickly rubbed cream on her belly and legs, then sat in the driver's seat, where Eddie was before.
"Turn around and face the window," she said.
"For what?"
"You listen to me, okay?"
"Well... Okay."
She took off the extra hair tie she wore on her wrist as a spare in case she lost the one she was wearing and grabbed Eddie's hair, doing him a bun.
"Tell me, are you cooler right now?"
"Yes, but I'm sure I look ridiculous."
"You look gorgeous, as always," she said matter-of-factly, as she settled everything in the car so she could start driving.
After a few more hours they stopped again to stretch their legs and change drivers, had dinner at a fast food place and finally ended up at a motel, almost on the outskirts of the state.
When they entered the room they saw that there was only one bed.
"I'll go and ask for a room with two beds," he said, turning away.
"Eddie, it's night, and you're exhausted," she stopped him, taking him by the arm. "Come in, come on," she said, nodding her head.
"You don't care?" he asked, referring to sharing a double bed.
"I don't give a shit," she was even excited, but of course she wasn't going to say that, and she couldn't know that he did too, but he didn't want to make her uncomfortable in any way, so that's why he offered asking for a room with two beds.
They arranged their things and the first thing they wanted to do was to take a shower, they were exhausted, sweaty and sticky from the sun cream.
"I'll shower first," they both said at the same time, standing in the middle of the small room after sorting their luggage and taking things out. "...You first," they both said again at the same time, and laughed at the synchronicity and telepathy they sometimes had.
"Rock, paper, scissors?" she asked.
"Come on," he said, leaning closer to her.
They both kept their dominant hands behind their backs and recited the chant of the game at the same time.
"...and... three!" They both pulled their hands behind their backs at the same time, making their hands and fingers make the shape of the object they had chosen in their minds. She drew paper and he drew scissors, but as soon as he saw that she was losing the game, he turned his hand from scissors to stone, and then put his arm around her shoulders, making her walk towards the bathroom.
"You win, you first," he said.
"Dude!" she said, annoyed but laughing.
"Shhh."
"Well okay, but at least let me get some panties and my pajamas, or do you want me to come out of the bathroom naked?"
"All right, all right," he said letting go of her and raising his arms in the air as if he was being mugged.
She grabbed her clothes and stepped into the shower. Meanwhile, he pulled on his pajamas (aka boxer shorts), turned on the TV that was there, looked for MTV and sat on the edge of the bed to watch it. He wanted to lie down on the bed, but he didn't want to stink up the bed with the stench of his sweat or stain it.
When she came out of the bathroom her hair was wet, she was wearing only panties and a baggy T-shirt, and clearly no bra.
"Your turn," she said as she made her way to the bed to lie down on the left side of it.
He got up from the edge of the bed and went into the bathroom, which was full of steam.
"Did you take a hot shower, you crazy woman?" he asked before closing the door to get undressed and get into the shower.
"Yes," she replied as if it was the most normal thing in the world for the month they were in.
"It's the middle of August."
"Do you think I don't know that?" she asked, holding back her laughter, and then he, still surprised, closed the door.
She flicked through the television herself, but ended up back on MTV, then picked up the phone on the bedside table and called her mother again to let her know where they were and that they were okay.
He came out of the bathroom shortly after, wearing only short but baggy black boxer shorts and still with drops of cold water sliding off him, mostly running down his tattooed chest and back from his wet hair.
"Anything interesting on TV?" he asked as he lay down next to her on the bed.
"No, but we should turn it off now anyway," she said, referring to the fact that they had to get up early the next morning to continue driving.
"Yeah," he said, getting out of bed.
He went to turn off the television and the light, then turned on the ceiling fan and opened the window, then took off all his jewellery and watch, and finally lay back down on the bed with her, on her side, resting her head on his right arm. She moved into the same position facing him, and he could see her silhouette perfectly thanks to the little light coming in from outside the motel. Her T-shirt rode up slightly, revealing her belly.
She moved closer and snuggled up to him, which he gladly accepted and wrapped his free, left arm around her.
"I still can't process all of this, if you told me about this when we became friends..." she said as she looked at her friend's tattooed chest.
"Yeah, I wouldn't believe it either," he said, stroking her arm with his thumb.
It was the 27th of July last year, in the morning. She drove to her nearest record shop before they opened first thing in the morning. There was a queue of metalheads waiting in line outside the door, and she assumed they were there for exactly the same thing she was: to buy Metallica's new album, Ride the Lighting. Last year, having just released their first album, Kill 'em all, she had fallen completely in love with them and their style of music, and couldn't miss out on having the new album the instant it was released. She walked past all the metalheads standing there, until someone called out to her, catching her attention.
"_______!"
There he was, standing like the others, impatiently waiting for the shop to open to get his record.
They both knew each other from high school, despite not being in the same year or classes, and not being from popular groups, they understood and respected each other.
"Are you coming to get the new Metallica album?" he asked.
"Yes," and a big smile broke out on Eddie's lips as he gestured for her to come with him, standing next to him in the queue. "Thank you," she said for being a sneak. The person behind him pouted but fortunately didn't protest.
"I didn't know you liked Metallica, let alone knew them," he said, smiling. It was always a pleasure to meet people with the same musical tastes, especially when your tastes were considered strange and living in a small town.
"I can't say the same," she said smiling sideways, "it's pretty obvious looking at you that you do know them and many more rock and metal bands."
During the little while they waited in line they talked about how they met Metallica, their favourite songs from Kill 'em all, their favourite band members and asked each other if they liked other bands.
They went inside and went straight to get their copies of Ride the Lighting to take home.
"I'd love to listen to it together," he said as they left the shop after paying for the records, "and know each other's opinion of the songs instantly."
"Yeah," she said as they walked to the car park.
"I'd invite you to my place, but since my uncle works nights he sleeps in the mornings, and I'm going to have to listen to it," he said, referring to the record, "with my headphones on..."
"It's all right," she said. She could invite him to her house, since her mother was working and she had the whole house to herself, but she had just met him formally, she wasn't going to just invite him to her house. "I have an idea."
"What's that?"
"As soon as we get home we'll listen to it and when we're done we'll call each other to talk about it, what do you think?"
"That's fine with me."
They exchanged phone numbers and got into their cars and headed home to listen to the album for the first time.
Two minutes after she finished listening to the album, the phone rang. She knew it was him.
"What do you think?" he asked expectantly.
"I'm in shock, man."
"In a good way or a bad way?"
"What do you think? Let's see."
"Good? Because come on, I loved it."
"Me too! Although I didn't like all the songs," she said with a wince as she ran her finger along the phone's curly cord.
"No? Really?!"
"Yes."
"Which ones didn't you like?"
"Fade to Black and The call of Ktulu or whatever the fuck it's called," she could hear a small chuckle on the other line.
"I don't think they're bad."
"No no, I'm not saying that, it's just that they're not my style, I need a lot more rhythm, apart from the fact that they're too long."
"Yeah, it's understandable. I do like them but they're not my favourites either."
"And which ones are?"
"I couldn't tell you, they're all very good..." he was thoughtful for a few seconds. "Maybe... My favourite is Creeping Death. The riff, the lyrics, James's voice... It's tremendous."
"I loved that one too! And For Whom the Bell Tolls. Ride the lighting too but not as much as those two. I need to listen to them on loop for hours, I swear, I loved them."
Who knew in that moment that that album would quickly become a gold album and that just over a year later they would hear them live with him on the other side of the country?
The next few days of the trip were pretty much the same as that day: driving for hours, changing drivers, putting on sun cream, stopping to eat and go to the toilet, calling her mother and his uncle, filling up with petrol, listening to their cassettes at full volume and singing loudly in the caravan, smoking tobacco, laughing, talking about silly things, taking pictures with the camera of _______, and taking showers and sleeping in motels.
It was Thursday night, and they were already in downtown Nevada, resting in the motel where they stayed that night. They were also in a room with only one bed, a double bed, but they didn't mind.
"I don't know if I'll be able to sleep tonight, I can't believe we'll be in Oakland by tomorrow. I could just keep driving right now," he said as they huddled together, and knowing him as well as she did, she knew it was true.
"Yeah, me too," she said, smiling as much as he was.
"I'm so glad you're my friend, I wouldn't be having this magical experience without you... I love you so much," he said smiling sweetly.
He really wanted to say so much more, he wanted to tell her how much he loved her, that she made him crazier than he already was, that he wanted to hold her tight and never let go, to kiss her and take care of her, but... He had to keep quiet. They had a precious friendship and if he confessed and she didn't reciprocate, which he assumed was most likely, it would probably make things very awkward between them and if he confessed during the trip, they wouldn't be able to run away from each other, having to share a car and rooms for days. It would be the worst-case scenario.
She assumed that he meant that he loved her very much as a person and as a friend, and nothing more. And he did mean that he loved her in those ways, but he also meant that he secretly loved her as a partner.
"I love you too," she said, smiling in the same way.
They stood for a few seconds looking into each other's eyes in silence, and for microseconds at times their eyes would wander to each other's lips.
Maybe it was the emotions running high, maybe it was the tiredness, maybe it was the night, maybe it was the hormones, maybe it was the way they were cuddled up in that marriage bed, maybe it was that she was sick of hiding her feelings, maybe it was that she was too brave when she liked someone, maybe it was Eddie's words and that she wanted to have even a little faith that she could have more than friendship with him, or maybe it was all of the above at once, but she decided to bring her face close to his, ridiculously slowly for fear of screwing up.
He noticed and almost had a heart attack. He didn't know what was going through his best friend's mind, he didn't know how she felt about him, but according to him, it looked like she was getting close to his face to kiss him, which if it was true, he had to take advantage of the opportunity, so he decided to do the same as her: get close to her face in a ridiculously slow way.
But then they were stopped by noises from the people in the next room, and they weren't just any noises; they were noises of bed springs and moaning, especially from a woman.
They both stopped dead in their tracks, frozen in their tracks, staring at each other with wide eyes and trying not to piss themselves laughing.
"This is ridiculous, I swear," she whispered as she moved slightly away from him and lay on her back, "I can't believe it," she said, pillowing her ears, to no listen the moans.
"Why are you whispering? You aren't the one who should be quiet. Do you want me to knock on the wall?" he asked as he raised his left arm and put his hand on the wall.
"No, let them have a good time," she said, her pillow no longer acting as a hoof against the noise. "Besides, if you hit the wall, you'll break her," she said as he lay on his back like her.
"We're not going to sleep tonight, but not for what we thought."
"It probably won't be long before they're done."
"They'd better."
And there they were, lying on their backs staring at the ceiling, taking in what had just happened, or rather what might have happened... if it hadn't been for the two shamelessly scandalous people who were fucking like rutting animals in the next room. They were uncomfortable in many ways, although they had to admit that the situation was funny at the same time.
The next evening they were in Oakland. They went to dinner and to stretch their legs a bit, seeing a bit of the city, and then to rest at the hotel where they would sleep.
"There are a lot of good looking guys around here," she said as they walked back to the hotel, noticing that there were a lot of metalheads around town, and she assumed that many of them might be like them: not from there, not living there, but had travelled there to attend the festival. "Something tells me they're here for the same reason we are."
He didn't say anything, he knew perfectly well that his best friend was crazy about long-haired men because she said so on several occasions, but still, he didn't think he had a chance with her even if he had long hair.
They still couldn't believe that they were already there and that the next day after lunch they would be at the stadium enjoying themselves like crazy.
The next morning they decided to take the car and go sightseeing in San Francisco, passing over the Bay Bridge of course. They were aware that with how big the city was and how little time they had before they had to be ready to go to the stadium in Oakland they wouldn't be able to see much, but they weren't there for sightseeing and seeing how different it was to Hawkins was enough for them.
The concert started at two in the afternoon.
She insisted that they had better be there as soon as possible to get parking in the stadium car park and to queue as soon as possible, so they drove back to their hotel in Oakland to get their tickets and then to the stadium. They were both wearing Metallica T-shirts.
Fortunately Eddie bought the tickets a few days after the event was announced, so they had tickets to be on the field and not in the stands, which was too boring and far away from the stage. As soon as the gates to the field opened, they and everyone else ran as if they were being chased with a chainsaw to get to the front row, in front of the stage.
"Do you see how I was right to come early?" she asked. They were almost in the front row.
"Yeah, yeah."
"I saw on TV once that this kind of thing happened at concerts in stadiums, at a Michael Jackson concert."
The first band to play was Victory, then Rising Force, then Metallica. At last the moment they had been waiting for the most, the moment they had travelled thousands of miles from their hometown on the other side of their big country had finally arrived.
_______ started screaming with excitement, jumping of joy and grabbing Eddie's arm, almost cutting off his circulation and digging her nails in when she heard The Ecstasy of Gold, a song by Ennio Morricone from the soundtrack for the film The Good, the Bad and the Ugly that they always played at the beginning of their concerts two years ago as they went on stage and prepared to play.
"Are you all right?" he asked, laughing.
"AAAAAAH!" she said, waving his arm.
"I agree," he laughed, "Ride on my back," he said, bending down.
"Oh," she thought the suggestion was a good idea, but she felt bad for him, because he would have to carry her weight for all or most of their performance and he wouldn't be able to enjoy doing headbangs, or pogos, or even raising his hands in the metalhead's signature horns symbol. "Are you sure?"
"Yeah," he said, "ride."
"Okay, thank you very much, really."
"You don't have to give them," he said as she mounted his back and grabbed it.
She had her favourite band member, Cliff Burton, practically a few feet away from her. She felt like if she reached out and lifted her arm she could touch him, even though he was actually about 20m away.
They started playing one of their favourite songs: Creeping Death.
She wasn't the only one going crazy with excitement and singing her lungs out for the song, there were many more people in the audience full of excitement to see the band playing live, and she was happy for them. They were a very good band, and it was one of the first times, if not the first, that they had played in a stadium in front of so many people.
"DIE! BY MY HAND, I CREEP ACROSS THE LAND, KILLING FIRST-BORN MAN! DIE! BY MY HAND, I CREEP ACROSS THE LAND, KILLING FIRST-BORN MAN, DIEEEEEE!"
Eddie looked up and saw her singing loudly with a smile from ear to ear that didn't fit on her face. He had never seen her so happy, and his smile grew bigger. Then he turned his attention back to the group in front of him.
"OH YEAH?" shouted James Hetsfield, the band's vocalist and rhythm guitarist, into the microphone, and then he tilted his head towards the audience and put his hand to his ear, as if trying to sharpen his hearing. He was clearly playing with the audience.
"OH YEAH!" they shouted, and many more.
"OH YEAH?" James shouted again, doing the same as before.
"OH YEAH!" they shouted again.
"FUCKING RIDE THE LIGHTIIIIING!" shouted James into the microphone, and he and the rest of the band started playing that song. "HEY! HEY! HEY! HEY! HEY! ARE YOU FUCKING OUT THERE?" he shouted raising his hand, encouraging the audience to be loud when they were already halfway through the song. "HEY! HEY! HEY! HEY!" he shouted in the same way almost at the end of the song, "I CAN'T FUCKING HEAR YOU!" he shouted as he put his hand to his ear. "HEY!"
Then he walked away from the microphone and stood next to Cliff. They were both doing headbangs and were perfectly in sync without even trying. Meanwhile, Kirk Hammett, the band's lead guitarist, on the other side of the stage was going more his own way.
When the song was over James walked over to the foot of the drum kit, where Lars Ulrich was standing, and picked up a small bottle of beer, probably fresh and alcoholic, and walked back to his microphone.
"ROCK AND ROOOOOLL!" shouted Eddie, and she laughed and shouted back.
"ARE YOU DOING ALL RIGHT?" asked James, and everyone shouted, "We've come here to kick some assess! [ . . . ] You know Cliff Burton over there?" He asked the crowd, pointing to his bandmate, the bass player. "Everyone, "Hey Cliff, how ya doing?"" he said waving his hand in greeting.
"HI CLIFF!" she and a few others shouted.
James stepped away from the microphone as he took a sip from the bottle of beer he had just picked up next to the drum kit, and Cliff began to play a bass solo while doing a light headbang, his head bent low and focused on the strings of his black bass while his hair moved incessantly, as did his fingers.
The best words to describe that bass solo were "Epic", "Legendary", "Magical", "Iconic", "Mind-blowing"... And it sounded like he was playing thunder instead of an instrument. ______'s eyes and mouth opened slightly without her noticing, and the hair on her body stood on end. Absolutely everyone was shocked, including Lars, who forgot to start playing the drums, and Cliff himself had to turn around and tell him he had to start playing. As soon as Lars started playing the drums, Cliff came back and played another epic bass solo.
She would recognise that rhythm anywhere, in any situation. It was For whom the bell tolls, and it was a song entirely written by Cliff. The smile on his face throughout the whole show, but especially during that song, was priceless. He kept doing headbangs, moving around the stage, gesticulating with his hands and singing to himself. You could tell he was excited to play that bass solo and his song in front of so many people enjoying it.
Then they started playing The Four Horsemen, a song from their first album, and it seemed that she wasn't the only one who was running out of voice, because she noticed James' voice faltering a bit.
The song was followed by Fade to Black, despite a boy in the audience shouting out Whiplash as a suggestion.
"Thank you! That was Fade to Black, from the album Ride the Lighting...! ...ARE WE GOING TO FUCK UP TODAY OR WHAT?" The crowd screamed in response, and he threw the pick at a person in the audience. "Good catch! ...WANT DESTRUCTION?" the audience shouted back in response. "By the way, this one goes... There's no other way, on the Kill 'em all album. We want to hear you scream! This song is called... SEEK & DESTROY!" The crowd screamed again for the third time, and more than the previous times. "I can't fucking hear you," said James pretending to be disappointed as the crowd sang the chorus. That was the song where the crowd was the loudest.
And last but not least, and finally for the fan in the audience who kept shouting it: Whiplash.
"THANK YOU SO MUCH!" said James as the song ended, "THANK YOU!
The crowd started screaming "Metallica!" non-stop, and seeing that they wanted more of them and that Y&T weren't ready to go on stage yet, they were allowed to play more songs. They chose to play half of Diamond Head's Am I Evil? and Motorbreath.
"Good day, whatever!" said James, waving goodbye to the audience. "Cheers! Thank you very much!"
As they left the stage, Eddie crouched down and she got off his shoulders.
"Well, we can go now," she said jokingly. "Thank you very much. I'll give you a massage later."
"Don't worry about it."
"That was amazing, my God!" she said as they walked out of the stadium after all the performances were over.
"I told you you had to come!" he said. "Thank goodness I convinced you into it."
"But can we talk about Metallica's performance? Oh my God, it's still not sinking in!"
"Cliff's bass solo in the intro of For whom the bell tolls made the hair on the back of my neck stand up," he confessed.
"Me too, man! And his smile throughout the whole song?! I love him, he's a genius and super adorable, I could tell he was living it up."
It took them a while to get out of the car parking and around the stadium as it was packed. Being from Hawkins, they had never seen so many cars together and so much traffic.
"Where do you want to go now?" he asked as he drove. It was still daylight, but it was late afternoon. "Are you hungry? Shall we go to dinner?"
"I'm not hungry yet, are you?"
"Neither am I."
"Not as hungry as the concert, but I can't wait to go to the beach and see the ocean. I'd like to see the sunset there."
"Then there we go."
They crossed back over the bay bridge and missed directions to the locals, peering out of the caravan windows. They were told that the best beach to enjoy the view, including the Golden Gate Bridge, was Baker Beach, so that's where they went.
They arrived at just the right time, at sunset. They took off their shoes and for the first time felt the sand under their feet and between their toes. The ocean breeze made their manes and their wide shirts move as the wind wanted them to, and for the first time they smelled the salty water. The eyes of _______ were fixed on the sun hiding behind the Pacific Ocean.
She decided to take her camera out of her bag and take a picture. Meanwhile, Eddie was looking at her. He thought she was prettier than the sunset. When she finished taking the picture, she put the camera back in her bag, put it on the ground and looked at the sunset again for a second, then looked at Eddie.
"This is the best day of my life," she said, teary-eyed but smiling.
"Hey hey hey," he said worriedly, "why are you crying?"
"I'm crying from happiness," she said as she smiled at her friend's concern and ran her fingers across her eyes to wipe away the tears, "it's a good thing."
Eddie put his arms around her and kissed her head repeatedly. She was too adorable, she could handle him. He loved her madly.
"It's the best day of my life, too," he said when they broke apart, and he placed one of his hands on her cheek, rubbing his thumb gently to wipe away the trace of the silent tear that had fallen down her face seconds before.
They both couldn't wait to tell the other that they loved each other, that they loved each other madly and not just as best friends, to kiss... But the fear of rejection and ruining the moment, the day, the trip and their friendship outweighed those desires.
"We haven't tasted water yet, how is that possible?" he said, grabbing her by the shoulders, trying to make her laugh and trying to distract himself from the impulse he had felt to confess and kiss her at that moment. "Come on!" he said, taking her by the hand and making her walk towards the shore, leaving her slippers, socks and bag behind.
"It's warm," she said, slightly surprised with her feet in the water.
"It must be because it's been in the sun all day. How about a swim? It's perfe-"
"Ugh, something touched my foot!" She said in disgust, lifting her foot and moving towards him.
"It's seaweed."
"I'm not taking a bath," she said, still disgusted.
"Because of the seaweed?" he asked, raising one of his eyebrows and smiling mockingly.
"It's too disgusting... For that I prefer swimming pools or bathtubs."
"It's just a plant, but a sea plant," he said, bending down and picking it up. He stretched out his arm to pull her closer but she pulled back as if he was holding a cockroach, and seeing how her body and face reacted, he couldn't help but laugh as he let go the plant. "Look, there's a very clean area over there," he said pointing with his head as he approached her, and while she was distracted for a second looking at the area he had pointed out to her, he bent down and grabbed her behind her knees and her waist, like a prince carrying his princess in a fairy tale that mothers told their daughters in bed before they went to sleep at night.
"What-" She didn't mind him grabbing her like that, in fact, she obviously liked it if it was him, but she stopped liking it when she saw Eddie start to go into the sea, into an area with too much seaweed for her liking. "Eddie, no! Don't even think about it!" and he laughed a wicked laugh, like when he saw his fellow Hellfire Club members in distress in a Dungeons and Dragons battle.
"Don't be a pussy!"
"Eddie I'm literally a pussy!" she said refering to her vagina.
"Not everything could be perfect this day, baby!"
"Eddie, if you drop me there, your uncle will never hear from you again! And I'm wearing clothes, not a bikini!"
"So what? The clothes are drying."
"Not in this air and it's getting dark, and I don't have a towel."
"Weeeell," he said, turning around while smiling and setting her down on the shore, on the sand.
They walked back to where they had left their things and she sat down on the sand. He decided to sit behind her, wrapping his legs and arms around her, resting his head on her shoulder.
"You're stupid," she said, annoyed but smiling at the same time.
"And you love me for it," he said, poking her lightly in the side with the tip of his index finger.
"Yes..." He sighed deeply, "very much, as you have no idea, much to my disgrace," she thought.
It was getting colder and colder, so they decided to go somewhere for dinner and then to the hotel to rest, trying to catch up on sleep while they were snuggled up to each other, as they were used to.
The next morning Eddie woke up with a horrible neck ache from doing so many headbangs and some back pain from holding _______ during Metallica's performance, so before leaving the hotel she lay on top of him on the bed and gave him the best neck, shoulder and back massage she could. She was smart and knowing how much her neck would hurt the next day and how fragile it was, she decided not to do headbangs.
Then they headed for Los Angeles and by lunchtime they were there, on Venice Beach with a few litres of alcoholic beer they had bought, and now they had their swimming costumes and towels on (and sunscreen, of course).
"We had rock and roll..." he said, referring to the festival, "we've had 'drugs', if we can consider them drugs...", he said, throwing his hands up in the air, one with a bottle of beer and a freshly lit cigarette in the other. She had forbidden him to bring weed for fear of being caught in a checkpoint. "The sex is the only thing missing."
"I don't feel like fucking any guy here," she said, "they all look like Barbie's boyfriend."
"And they all look like Barbies here," he said half-heartedly, to her surprise.
"But Barbies are pretty."
"Have you seen the sculptures of the ancient Romans? They're made of rock, they're quality and there are few of them. On the other hand, there are a lot of plastic ones, of poor quality and copies of each other. I prefer a woman made of rock."
"How do you know that, Shakespeare?" She asked with a mocking smile. "I thought you were bad at history."
"Yes, but not at art."
"Anyway, even if we wanted to fuck with someone here, I don't think they'd want to fuck with us."
"Speak for me, but not for you. You're beautiful."
"I'm not that much."
"Said the one who always has several guys behind her."
"But they're not Kens because I'm not a Barbie, I'm not popular."
"You are popular among the "weirdos" at school, and you know it, don't tell me you're not."
"Well, I didn't say I was ugly, I admit it, but..."
"You're beautiful. End of discussion."
"Well, all right, if you say so..." She looked away, holding her smile and blushing a little, "Thanks, I guess. You too," she looked back at him.
"Oh, you think I'm a pretty girl, too!" He said in a squeaky voice and put his hand to his chest, pretending to be surprised. "Thank you very much! Aren't you roasting? Shall we go in the water? Or are you still terrified of seaweed?"
"Mm..." Yes, actually yes, she was too disgusted by that.
"At least come and soak your feet, right?" he asked as he stubbed out his cigarette in the sand and got up.
"Well, okay," she said, doing the same as she made a bun with one of the hair ties around her wrists.
"The tide brings the seaweed to the shore," he said, pointing to it as the two of them stood there soaking their feet, "but look, it's all clear up ahead. You only have to go the first few yards. I can carry you and get you there without you touching any seaweed."
"Uh..."
The beach was full of people and she was embarrassed to be seen being carried, as if she didn't have the legs to walk and go into the water on her own. It would be more embarrassing if they found out how disgusting the seaweed made her feel, but it was not her fault that she found it disgusting, especially as an inland girl who could only swim in clean pools. But then she thought that she shouldn't give a shit what strangers thought of her and that she didn't want to miss the experience of swimming in the Pacific Ocean with her best friend after an epic and unforgettable trip, so she accepted the proposal.
"Well, okay," he thought he was going to carry her like he had carried her at the festival the day before, but he carried her like he had carried her on the beach in San Francisco, like a princess. That was a little more embarrassing than being carried like a little girl on hia back. "How are you not disgusted by stepping on them?" she asked, disgusted, referring to the seaweed as he began to walk deeper into the ocean.
"They're just plants," he laughed, "you act like they're cockroaches."
"But their touch is disgusting."
"I don't think it's that bad."
"Well, lucky you."
"You know there are people who eat them?"
"Good for them," she said indifferently, and he laughed again at her answer. "Oh, it's freezing!" she said, referring to the water when he was already deeper in, the water coming up to his waist, and she was wetting her butt.
"It's not that bad! Besides, what did you expect? Don't be a pussy!"
And when he finally reached the area without seaweed, he suddenly let her go, making her scream at such an abrupt change of temperature. She, annoyed, splashed him with her arm. He laughed.
"It would have been worse little by little, if you do it all at once it's less bad," yes, he was one of those who jumped in the pool, "or did you want me to baptise you?" He closed his eyes, shut his mouth, covered his nose with his hand and bent down, putting his head completely in the water. When he pulled it out, he shook her hair like a shampoo advert and splashed her a little.
They stayed on the beach most of the day, until it got dark and they went to the hotel where they would be staying that night.
On Monday morning, 2 September, they would start the journey home, back to Hawkins. It was a bit depressing, as they didn't want the trip to end, they had had too much fun, and on top of that they didn't feel like going back to school, especially as they had to repeat their last year.
It was the second time that Eddie had repeated his last year and the whole group of friends from ______ had graduated and left town, but at least they would be in the same class together.
The last night they spent together they were sad for that very reason, because it was going to be the last night they would sleep together. And the last morning they spent together Eddie woke up before she did, so knowing how little his best friend wanted to go back and start her last term again, he decided to wake her up by tickling her, making her squirm in bed, crying with laughter and screaming for him to stop.
They returned to Hawkins on Saturday evening. Eddie helped get their luggage out of his van and into their house, and her mother offered to stay for dinner with them, so she could listen to the stories of the trip told by the two of them. Knowing that his uncle would not be home when he arrived because of his work schedule, and knowing that his best friend's mother's food was better than anything edible in his house, he gladly accepted the invitation.
"The beaches were amazing. The one I liked best was the one in San Francisco, because of the view of the Golden Gate," she told her mother when the three of them were at the dinner table.
"But she was afraid to go in the water because she was disgusted by the seaweed," said Eddie, "and the next day in Los Angeles I had to carry her like a Disney princess to get her into the water without being brushed by any of the seaweed."
"I wasn't afraid, you exaggerator!" she said in her defence, "just disgusted."
And then it was time to say goodbye. They both felt it would be a long time before they would see each other again, but in reality they would see each other in two days, on Monday morning at the school.
"I had a great time," she said in front of him, holding his hands, looking at him and smiling wistfully beside his van, parked in front of her house, "thank you for convincing me to come, thank you for everything."
"Thank you for coming," he said, looking at her and smiling in the same way, squeezing her hands and then letting go to give her a long, tight hug. "I'll see you Monday at school, okay?" he said as they parted.
"Unfortunately," she didn't even have a spark of desire to go back there, who would? Only popular people or people who find it easy to study or the poor bastards whose validation depends on having high numbers on papers after spewing out useless data for everyday life. "Goodbye," she said as she began to walk backwards, waving her hand as a final goodbye, and then she turned around. He stood there, watching her walk away from him and through the door of her house, making the last direct eye contact with her eyes quickly before she closed the door behind her.
As much as she was looking forward to seeing her mother and being in the comfort of her home, and especially in the comfort of her room and bed, she felt that she had missed something of utmost importance along the way, that she was missing something important: it was him, and the post-concert, post-trip depression. The same thing happened to him, and on top of that his uncle wasn't at home to greet him when he arrived from dropping off ______ at her house, but he knew that was a likely thing. He would see him on Sunday at noon, as he had a night shift, and in the morning he slept.
Their beds were supposed to be their greatest source of comfort, especially after almost two weeks of travelling around the country, from motel to hotel and back again. So why couldn't they sleep? They were not stupid, they were aware of their feelings, but they didn't think it would affect them so much. They missed each other, they wanted each other to be there beside them, lying down and cuddling. He tried to hug his pillow but it wasn't the same. She wanted to hug a crappy stuffed animal he gave her off the arcade hook a year ago but it was too small to be cuddled.
Eddie could have perfectly well drugged himself to calm down and fall asleep as soon as possible, but instead he decided to do something even more stupid: get out of bed, leave the house, get in the van and drive to his best friend's house. Hopefully she was still awake, hopefully they could sleep together that night, hopefully he wouldn't make a fool of himself in front of her for having such a need like a little kid.
"Shit," he thought as he got out of the van, which he had parked in front of the house. He didn't see any light inside, everything indicated that mother and daughter had already gone to bed in their respective rooms.
But then he thought that just because she was in bed didn't mean she was already asleep. She decided to go to the side of the house and stand under her bedroom window. He bent down to the floor in search of pebbles to throw at the window to get her attention in a quiet way, without waking her mother or her neighbours.
He threw a pebble at her window, calculating his aim with his mind and throwing it hard enough so that it would reach the window but not break the glass even a little bit. It didn't rattle against the glass because there was no glass, the window was open because of the heat, but he thought that wasn't a problem, and maybe it was more effective for the pebble to go inside her room.
As it happened, the pebble ended up inside her room, bouncing on the floor, making noise, but he didn't know that for sure, he didn't know if that had woken her up if she was sleeping or if it had caught her attention enough to make her get out of bed and look out the window to see what was going on, so he decided to throw another pebble, and just as he was about to throw it, she looked out of the window.
"Eddie?" she asked in a whisper, surprised and confused. "What is it? What are you doing here?" He dropped the pebbles and took a few steps forward. It was the moment he was waiting for, what he had planned and wanted was happening, but he opened his mouth to speak and nothing came out of him. He didn't know what to say, because there was really a lot he wanted to express. "Do you want me to come down?" she asked, and he nodded his head quickly, but it was dark and she couldn't see it very well, so she decided to ask. "Yes?"
"Yes," he answered, "please."
"I'll be right there, wait a second," she said, who had to put on a pair of trousers because she was in her panties, go downstairs and get her keys.
"No hurry," he said as he moved away from the window. He took a deep breath, trying to calm himself. The longer it took her to come down, the more time he would have to calm down. He was restless, more than usual. He never used to get this nervous before playing in front of people from the school.
He heard the door of the house open and close and she approached him with the keys in the pocket of the shorts she had just put on. Crickets could also be heard not far away, and the leaves of the trees rustling in the thin breeze.
"What's the matter?" She said, approaching him with concern. "Has something happened?"
"No, no, it's all right," she saw how nervous and uneasy he was and knew he was lying, but she took his hands to calm him in every way. He gladly agreed, and he did calm down somewhat.
"So?" she asked, even more puzzled.
"Well... You see... I know it's stupid, but... Well, you know me, don't you? I'm like that, I can't help it..." There was a brief silence in which he didn't know what to say, or rather how to say it, trying to find the words in his mind while she looked at him and waited for whatever he was going to say. She didn't really know what to expect from him, and the situation was strange. "I couldn't sleep and I think it's because I'm missing you by my side," he laughed nervously again. She smiled and tightened her grip.
"The same thing was happening to me."
"Really?" he asked in surprise.
"Really."
"So...? Are we sleeping together tonight?"
"Please and thank you. At your place?"
"Okay."
"I'll come in for a moment to write a note to my mother for when she wakes up tomorrow and doesn't see me at home," he said, holding up her hand, pointing to her house with her thumb behind it, "okay?"
"Sure."
After what she said and did, they rode in his van to Eddie's house in absolute silence, no music, no talking. They didn't need to, and they didn't have anything to talk about since they hadn't seen each other for only two hours. The silence was not uncomfortable, they wore smiles on their lips and their hair swayed in the breeze coming through the lowered windows.
"If your uncle sees me and finds out that we slept in the same bed, he'll think badly," she said as she climbed into his bed and snuggled against him.
"Let him think what he wants, I don't care," he said as she settled her head on his arm, "he'd be happy and everything. Your mother is not the only one who matches us," which was true. Some people in town, especially in high school, just assumed the two of them were a couple.
"Yeah."
He started stroking her head, or rather her hair, with the hand on the arm she was using as a pillow. The other was on her back. They were pressed against each other. He had his neck in front of her face, and his tattooed chest exposed. They both felt at last at peace, completely calm and ready to sleep if they wanted to, but they didn't want to, they wanted to enjoy this moment of being conscious.
"You could have fallen asleep smoking weed but you didn't, why?"
"You're my favourite drug," he dared to say. The night made everyone feel vulnerable and sensitive, and he was no exception. Maybe he shouldn't listen to the things that went through his mind at night, but there were times when he couldn't help it, and that was one of those times.
That phrase and him going to her home to tell hee that he needed to sleep with her definitely had to mean something, something good and important, but she couldn't assume that either if it didn't come out of his mouth in a more explicit way. She didn't want to get her hopes up, make an Oscar-worthy movie in her head, and then get the shock and the downer.
Luckily for her, Eddie spoke without her asking any questions.
"There's something else I wanted to tell you..."
"What's that?"
"The problem is... I'm afraid to tell you."
"Whatever it is, you can tell me, Eddie. I love you madly and I'm going to be there for you no matter what."
"I don't know how to express it either..."
"So, if you can't put it into words.... Express it with an action," she said, believing where he was going.
Emboldened by his best friend's words and the late hours of the night, he decided to move the hand on her back to her cheek. With his thumb he brushed her lips to find out exactly where they were, for they were in their room in complete darkness, unable to see each other even if they were inches away from each other. Then he raised her head slightly and bowed his head, and at last did what he had wanted to do for more than half a year: he kissed her, confessing at last his deep feelings for her. She quickly returned the kiss, while a big smile formed on her lips.
"So... Is that what you wanted to tell me?"
"Yes, for a long time," he said, leaning his forehead against hers.
"How long?"
"More than half a year ago."
"Well, it seems we're in sync even for that."
"Do you feel the same way I do?" He asked, surprised and confused but happy at the same time.
"How do you feel about me Eddie? Please tell me, I want to hear it come out of your mouth," she said, now she was caressing his cheek.
"I love you. You are my Arwen to my Aragorn. When I hear love songs I can't help but think of you. You make me so happy just to be by my side. You are beautiful in every way and I have so much fun with you. You are not only my best friend and the person I love the most after my uncle, you are the woman of my dreams and I think you are my soul mate" with every sentence he said she got more emotional and it was hard for her to hold back the urge to cry with happiness, while he was still not processing that he had just kissed her, that his kiss had been reciprocated and that he was finally telling her out loud what he'd been keeping quiet and so deep inside for so long, "and I can't wait to fucking graduate so I can start working a full time job and save up to get married and live on our own and together in our own house, our own home. ...Although any place is a home if you're there," he suddenly heard a sob and felt a drop fall on his arm, the one that was being her pillow. "_______?" he asked frightened with fear that he had completely screwed up.
"I love you so much," she said crying out of pure happiness, her heart couldn't fit in her chest from all the happiness she was feeling, "you have no idea how happy you make me right now."
"So you're crying from happiness again?"
"I couldn't cry for anything else," and now it was she who jumped up and kissed him. Then he hugged her tightly.
"Do you want to be my girlfriend?"
"You didn't even have to ask."
"I wanted to ask you, I've wanted that for a long time and to hear a yes for an answer from you," she smiled even more, almost laughing at what he had just said.
"Yes, silly, I do."
"Now I'm completely yours, more yours than ever, more than I've ever been."
"I'll say the same."
They kissed again, and then he moved his free hand to her pillowy arm, and took off one of the three rings he wore. He took off the skull-shaped one and handed it to her, leaving it on her hand. She could tell which ring it was by touch.
"I want you to have it from now on, as a token of my love and our relationship."
"Thank you," she said, putting it on her thumb, as it was too big on the rest of her fingers.
Little else happened after that, just a few more kisses, caresses and the occasional playful touch but nothing more. They were exhausted from the journey and finally felt at peace, ready to sleep now that they were together physically and romantically.
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yekokataa · 3 days ago
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hello what is Polish Boys? is it a book? how is it related to DE?
anon you have no idea how excited i am to randomly talk about this book, this ask is like a christmas present to me. polish boys is a lightly fictionalized history of the za/um cultural collective, aka the group of people who usually get called 'disco elysium's original devs' these days. it was written by an author who goes by mudlum. her real name is made luiga. she's martin luiga's mother and she was also part of the cultural collective. her approach to fictionalizing it was basically to transport everyone to poland, give them fake names, and set it in an ambiguously retro 20th century time period.
if you're looking for DE lore, there really isn't any. the events of the book take place in the years leading up to it, and it's only really mentioned in passing towards the end, fictionalized as sulisław, the character based on kurvitz, working on a cartoon.
the style of the novel is a meandering bildungsroman, beginning with the childhood of adam (martin luiga), his struggles in school, and his friends teofil (argo) and sulisław. other portions are focused on adam's mother, their family history, and a few other characters that i couldn't correlate with their real life inspirations. the group sits around, gets drunk, talks politics, moves into a dilapidated old house, and eventually forms a cultural magazine. then, with the help of a character based on kaur kender, they take over an official cultural magazine, a real life event that caused a bit of a stir in estonia.
unfortunately the book hasn't been published in english, but a translation does exist. the main way to access it is through a series of readings in this playlist on youtube. it's a very poetic, evocative book. i really enjoyed it a lot and i plan on buying it if the english version ever gets published.
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