#friends are supposed to do things like this | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

sceletaflores · 2 days ago

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GIVE IT TO HER LIKE A MAN!

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｡𖦹°‧➵ pair: dbf!joel miller x fem!reader

｡𖦹°‧➵ wc: 5.1k

｡𖦹°‧➵ contains: 18+ SMUT MDNI, no outbreak au, no ellie, joel’s pov, swearing, age gap (52/23), semi-public sex (more of a semi-public ALMOST over the pants handjob?), p in v, clothed sex, unprotected sex, rough sex, hair pulling, spit kink, degradation, pussy spanking, creampie, fucking in your childhood bedroom RAAAHHH, one (1) single line about joel wanting to slap you, one (1) single use of the word daddy, erectile dysfunction? we don't know what that means in this house because that old man can fuck like he's twenty, porn w/o plot, no use of y/n.

｡𖦹°‧➵ nat’s note: hi babies! i'm back! did you miss me? cause i missed you and oh em gee i'm so excited to be rejoining the party. this actually wasn't what i planned on posting but the angsty joel fic is kicking my ass so hard that i had to take a break from it. i just needed to word vomit some raunchy, freak-nasty porn to cleanse my palate! i don’t normally go for the dbf trope but it's just so joel i couldn't not dip my feet in these waters. it's also more like dad's-close-but-distant-acquaintance-joel because in my head that man has little to no friends honestly. hope you love it, mwah!

dividers by @cafekitsune & @saradika-graphics!

joel gives the best graduation gifts...

Joel isn’t the type to get invited to these kinds of things.

Graduation parties for Ivy League brats. Champagne in fancy crystal flutes and catered hors d'oeuvres getting passed around on silver trays. Men in loafers and pastel polos calling each other “old buddy” without any irony. It’s a far cry from his usual crowd—his mangy old t-shirt and stained blue jeans stick out in the place like a damn sore thumb.

The invitation came from a distant friend, someone he used to work with before his career took him in an entirely different, much shiner direction. He was here more as a favor than anything else. Tommy’s been worried about him, says he needs to get out more.

“Meet some new people, drink a few beers.” He’d said with his hand clasped on Joel’s shoulder. “It ain’t healthy to spend every weekend fixin’ shit around the house, Joel.”

Joel doesn’t see the problem. He’s fine the way he is. But somehow, he still got roped into going when he could have used any excuse to pull out at the last second. He could have faked sick, faked busy, faked like he had anything else to do besides sit at a fancy oak table on a back porch bigger than the whole first story of his house, decorated in Yale blue balloons and streamers.

He regretted giving into Tommy the second he pulled up in the driveway—a too-big Craftsman style place in West Lake Hills, all clean laid brick and perfectly manicured lawns. Joel couldn’t for the life of him remember why he said yes in the first place. Maybe it was the guilt of worrying his brother. Maybe for the decent catered food and overpriced beers he knew would be there when he first got the address.

What he hadn’t expected—what hit him in the goddamn chest when the door swung open after he knocked—was you.

And Christ, did you look smug about it.

It had been months ago. The only reason Joel was even in Connecticut was to meet with a client, a big time East Coast entrepreneur who wanted a new add on to his ten car garage and was fine slinging around the money to pay for a round-trip flight and a cushy hotel room.

He hadn’t planned on going to the bar that night, but after hours of back-and-forth about permits and material costs, he needed a drink. Just one, maybe two—enough to take the edge off before heading back to the hotel.

It was a shitty little dive about ten minutes from where he was staying. The beer was cold, the lights were low, and he wasn’t supposed to be making decisions with his little head. But then he saw you across the way, right in the middle of the dancefloor.

You were in a circle with a few other girls, your dress riding up higher and higher each time you’d roll your hips to the heavy bass blaring from the overhead speakers.

Joel watched you like that for a while, leaned up against the bar lazily sipping at his beer. He hadn’t planned on doing anything about it, just sat there and enjoyed the view. But you’d caught him looking, and instead of turning away and pretending not to notice, you’d smirked.

Joel should have known right then that he was in trouble.

It wasn’t long before you left your little group and made your way over, slipping on the stool beside him like you belonged there, like you’d already made your mind up about what was going to happen next. You’d leaned in close, close enough for him to catch the scent of whatever perfume you’d rolled over your throat before heading out—something rich and heady that damn near made his head spin.

“Hey, cowboy.” You’d said with a tilt of your head, the long column of your neck dewy with a light sheen of sweat he wanted to feel under his tongue. “You’ve been watching me?”

There was no accusation in your voice, just a quiet sort of amusement, like you already knew the answer.

Joel had huffed a laugh, he didn’t see the point of denying it. He was a lot of things, but subtle wasn’t one of them. “Yeah.” He’d admitted, taking a slow sip of his beer before setting it down. “What about it?”

Your eyes dropped down the length of his body, studying him, and he’d let you. Let you take your time looking, even as heat crawled up the back of his neck.

“Buy me a drink?” You’d asked, smiling up at him like butter wouldn’t melt in your mouth.

That was all it took.

One drink turned into two, which turned into three, and then you were leaning into his space like you were made to be there. Your index finger teasingly tracing along the collar of his shirt as you whispered something filthy in his ear that had all the blood in his brain rushing down south.

Joel really shouldn’t have let it go any further than some goddamn footsie under the bar and a few dirty words whispered over the rims of shiny glasses, he was too old for shit like that. But you were just so damn tempting—confident and sharp and pretty as all hell.

Before Joel knew it he had you pressed up against the side of his truck, giggling into his mouth, fingers tugging at his belt like you couldn't get it off fast enough. You’d tasted like the fruity cocktails he bought you and something sweeter underneath, something distinctly you, and Joel had to have more.

You let him have it too—fisting his shirt and dragging him into the backseat without a care in the world, all eager hands and breathless laughter as you straddled his lap.

It was supposed to be just that. A reckless decision with a pretty young thing as the cherry on top of his trip. A one-night deal he’d let himself have because, fuck, it had been a long time since someone looked at him like that.

Joel tried his damndest to think how he should’ve, tried not to let some one off fuck turn him all sorts of ass backwards. He tried his damndest to boot you out of his mind the next morning when he was boarding the flight back to Austin—but you stuck anyway, like a burr in his goddamn brain.

The way you’d looked sprawled out under him, eyes glazed over with pleasure, lips parted, or the way you’d moaned his name like it was a prayer you needed him to hear. The way you’d rode him nice and slow, dragging your nails down his chest just to watch him shudder. The way you’d kissed him after, lazy and sweet, before sneaking off into the night like a goddamn thief.

Joel could've sworn he saw God that night, a smudged silhouette in the fogged up windows of his truck.

And now you’re here, standing in the doorway of some polished, high society home, looking like sin wrapped up in tulle and pearls.

Joel wasn’t a man who spooked easy, but seeing you again, surrounded by people who had no goddamn idea what you’d let him do to you in the backseat of his truck all those months ago, knocked him on his ass harder than a sucker punch.

The recognition was damn near instant, your eyes shining just as much as the sparkly sash that read “GRAD!” in big glittery letters. The initial shock gave way to a tiny, secret smile as your gaze slid up and down his body shamelessly, like this was some kind of funny inside joke.

Joel was seconds away from turning tail, walking back down your ridiculously long driveway and getting in his truck to get the hell out of there, but then your father was walking up behind you with a big grin on his face. He clapped Joel on the shoulder roughly and introduced his “Old buddy Joel Miller from his blue-collar days!”

You were all coy smiles and wide eyes. A sugared, “It’s so nice to meet you, Mr. Miller. Thank you for coming…” passing through your glossy lips.

The same lips that left shiny red smudges along the skin of his cock when you slid him down your throat, peering up at him with glassy eyes. The memory alone was enough to get heat stirring deep in his gut, and the way you looked at him now—all demure and polished, like you were some angelic scholar fresh off a podium—only made it worse.

Joel is too damn old for this.

“Very top of her class,” your father boasts, swishing his beer bottle through the air towards you flippantly. “Can you believe it? Just think of what we were doing at her age, brother. She sure as hell didn’t get any brains from me, that’s all her mother.”

Joel tries to chuckle with him, but it sounds strained, forced. He keeps his eyes facing forward, knee bouncing restlessly under the table. You’re looking at him again, hot and persistent against the side of his face. The heavy weight of your gaze practically begging him to look back. He doesn’t.

This dinner is it’s own form of torture, because of course, you just had to sit in the empty seat next to Joel—close enough that he can feel your knee bump up against his every few minutes.

He’s done a good job avoiding you until now, always walking the other direction when you waltz into the same room, not making eye contact when your gaze would sweep over the crowd hoping to catch his, trying for once in his life to be a good man.

A good man that suffers through this damn party without doing something he'll regret, that leaves at the end of the night and never has to see you again.

“Yeah,” he says, nervously starting to pick at the label of his own beer. Some snobby, imported New England brewery, probably sixty bucks a six-pack. “Good times.”

Joel can see you lean forward out of the corner of his eye, the neckline of your dress sliding down an inch as you stare at him, attention rapt. “What were you like back then, Mr. Miller?”

Joel nearly winces, his fingers tightening around the neck of his beer hard enough to turn the skin around his knuckles white.

‘Mr. Miller’ echoes in his ears lewdly, blaring like church bells. Your voice is nothing but a honey-sweet mockery, so syrupy he can nearly feel it trickling down his throat to add to the warmth settling low in his stomach.

Your father snorts over the lip of his bottle, answering you before Joel could open his mouth. “Joel didn’t go to college, honey. He went into the trades right after graduation,” he takes a long sip, Joel feels your knee bump against his again. “That’s how we met.”

You hum, nodding your head languidly. “You’re an architect too?”

Joel shakes his head, not looking at you as he answers. “Carpenter.”

Your father launches into some story about his old work days with Joel, about how back in the day, they were “real men” with “real jobs,” but Joel can barely process any of it. He nods along absently, lets out some half-hearted chuckles when he needs to.

Joel nearly puts his knee through the table when he feels your barefoot brush up against his ankle, hiking his jeans up ever so slightly. He shoots you a glare as subtly as he can.

It’s a look so sharp, so warning, that it should be enough to make you back the hell off from whatever game you’re playing. You’re not even looking at him anymore, eyes glued to your father as you nod along to whatever story he’s telling now.

But there’s a knowing little smile on your lips as your hand creeps beneath the table and falls into his lap, the pads of your fingers pressing against the inside of his thigh.

Joel goes still. Rigid as his breath catches on a sharp inhale.

Christ, you’re trying to kill him.

Your father’s voice pulls him out of the silent panic and heavy arousal waging a war inside of him. “How’s business, Joel?” he asks, leaning back in his chair. “You and Tommy still running things at a hundred miles a minute?”

Joel barely registers the question as your hand inches higher and higher. He can hear his own pulse pounding in his throat, in his chest, in his cock, already half-hard in his boxers from some goddamn heavy petting like a wet behind the ears teenager.

“Yeah, we–” Joel pauses, willing his voice to steady with a quick cough to clear his throat. “We’ve been pretty busy with Summer rollin' around.”

Your father hums in agreement, cracking open another beer. “Of course, my schedule’s been a killer too this season,” he brags shamelessly, tone heavy with understanding like he and Joel are in the same boat. Only your fathers boat is a three million dollar yacht sailing for blue-print meetings with big shot celebrities and architectural digest interviews. “It’s a miracle I even had time to fly in for the party, isn’t that right sweetheart?”

Your hand slides up the length of his cock in one slow stroke, your palm grinding roughly over the tip through the tented denim.

“Yes, daddy.”

Your voice has gone all light and airy around the edges, almost melodic as it buries itself in Joel’s ears. At first, Joel thinks you’re talking to your father, but when his eyes flick over to you, you’re looking at him—your eyes half-lidded and sparkling with something dangerous as your fingers tug at the tab of his zipper.

Joel’s hand flies to your wrist, squeezing tight enough to stop your pawing at his now fully hard cock. “Alright if I use your bathroom?” he asks sharply, his voice a little too loud. He tosses your hand away and stands abruptly from his chair before he’s got an answer.

“Of course,” your father says easily, thankfully not noticing the tension at the table, or the way Joel’s trying to subtly hold his hands over his crotch. He turns his attention towards you, “Would you show Joel where the downstairs bathroom is, honey?”

Your smile only widens as you slip your sandal on and calmly stand from your own chair. “Sure,” you say breezily, but you’re not looking at your father, dark eyes still glued to Joel’s. “Follow me.”

The flowy fabric of your dress swishes behind you as you walk through the yard, Joel hot on your heels. He waits until you're both in the house, stepping through the open sliding glass door and out of view before his hand flies to your arm and squeezes hard.

Joel hears you wince softly, but you don’t try to fight your way out of his grip. He leans down closer, his lips inches away from your ear. His voice is low and rough as he grits out, “Take me to your room, now.”

You lead him through the kitchen and up the stairs silently, but Joel can still see the smug smile on your lips as you turn the corner. The need to slap that bratty shit right off your face wracks through him like thunder, anger burning hotter in his chest with every step.

You push the door to your bedroom open and step inside, barely turning to face him before Joel slams the door shut behind him and stalks past you. His eyes are dark, filled with a mix of rage and want as he stares you down.

“Do you think this is a goddamn game?” His voice is teeming with fury, the calm facade he scarcely maintained at dinner now entirely gone. “That you can do whatever the hell you please because your Daddy’s sittin' across from you?”

You bite your bottom lip, leaning against the door with your arms crossed behind your back coyly. “You didn’t bring me a present.”

It’s a taunt if Joel’s ever heard one, and it finally breaks him.

He crosses the room in three large strides, pinning you against the door. His hands on either side of your head, caging you in. Joel cranes his neck down, his face inches away from yours. He can smell your perfume this close, it’s different than what you wore at the bar—something soft and girly and sweet that has his cock straining in his boxer.

“You’re real fuckin' proud of yourself aren’t you?” he spits roughly, watching the way your pupils dilate, eyes going glossy under his intensity. “Does your old man know how much of a tramp his precious little baby girl is? That she’s got such a greedy fuckin' pussy she can’t help herself from rubbin' his buddy Joel’s cock under the table like a desperate slut.”

“Joel,” you whisper breathlessly, all the attitude draining from you at the drop of a hat the second he gets a little mean. Your eyes are stuck on his lips and, after a beat, you start leaning in, like you’ll die if you don’t kiss him.

Joel stops you with a hand fisted in your hair, keeping you still a few centimeters away from his lips. A pitiful whine falls from your slack mouth, wide eyes flicking back up to meet his with a pleading look.

“You want me to kiss you, princess?” he asks, mean and condescending. Your breath puffs over his lips, hot and needy as you nod your head as best you can. Joel laughs, dark and cool as he shakes his head slowly. “Whores like you don’t get kissed baby, they get fucked.”

It does something to you—Joel can see it in the way your lashes flutter, in the way your thighs press together, like you can feel his words between your legs. He watches the rise and fall of your chest quicken, the way your lips part as a little breathless sound escapes them, and he knows he’s got you right where he wants you.

Desperate. Squirming. Ready to let him ruin you.

“Look at you,” he murmurs, low and almost reverent, but the wicked curl of his lips betrays the softness in his tone. “Bet you’re already soaked, aren’t you?”

You nod, your chest rising up to press against his with every breath.

“Words,” he demands, voice sharp as a needle. Your thighs twitch at the sound of it.

“Yes,” you breathe shakily. “I’ve been wet since you got here.”

That has Joel groaning, jaw ticking as his cock twitches heavily in his boxers, pre-come oozing into the cotton.

He doesn’t waste another second. He drops your hair to grab your shoulders, pulling and pushing until you’re tumbling onto your old bed. You let out a sharp gasp as your back hits the mattress, the force of it bouncing you a few times.

Joel looms over you, watching you, finally letting himself get a good look at the picture you make. Splayed across dainty floral sheets, chest heaving, staring up at him with need written all over your pretty face. It practically pumps off of you in waves, he can almost taste it.

Without another word, Joel reaches for his belt, his heavy gaze never leaving yours. The metal of his buckle clinks loudly in the quiet of the room, underscored by the quick pants of your breath. It snaps with how hard he yanks it out of his belt loops, the leather cracking in the air menacingly.

"You wanted this," Joel mutters, popping the button on his jeans, dragging the zipper down with a sharp hiss. "You practically fuckin’ begged for it."

You make a desperate little sound at the sight of his cock finally being freed from the confines of his jeans—thick, heavy, and leaking when it slaps against his stomach. Your legs spread wider like an offering, like you need it in you now.

Joel huffs out a laugh, grabbing your ankle and yanking you down the bed, making you squeak in surprise. He climbs on the mattress, his body completely blanketing yours so you couldn’t move if you wanted to.

His hand drags down your body, over the swell of your breasts, over your ribs, the curve of your hip, until he’s gripping the hem of your dress. Joel slips his hand under the skirt, rough palms gliding up the soft skin of your thighs before gripping the meat of them hard enough to bruise.

The thought of you finding the marks tomorrow, pretty shades of purple and yellow branding your skin as a reminder of this moment, of what Joel did to you—it makes his stomach flip with a sick thrill.

It doesn’t take much for Joel to push the bunched fabric around your hips the rest of the way up, exposing the barely-there scrap of lace covering you.

He makes a sound low in his throat when he sees the little damp spot blooming along the powder blue fabric. “So fuckin’ needy,” he mutters, tracing his middle finger along the wet seam of your pussy, featherlight, teasing. “Can’t even sit through one damn dinner without beggin’ for my attention like a two-bit truck stop whore.”

You nod frantically, lips trembling, pupils blown wide as you blink up at him.

Joel tsks mockingly, raising his palm to give your clothed pussy a sharp slap that has you crying out. “Use your words, baby.”

“Yes,” you gasp. “Please, Joel.”

Your voice is so soft, so wrecked. And Joel feels himself get impossibly harder, his cock throbbing where it’s pressed against your stomach, blurting pre-come onto the delicate pink tulle of your dress. He can hardly wait any longer.

Joel hooks a finger into the leg of your panties, dragging them down hard enough that he hears a rip. He can’t find it in himself to care, he just pulls them far enough that they pool around your ankles uselessly.

He finally takes himself in his hand so he can drag his cock through the wet mess of your pussy, bumping it up against your hole but not giving you a damn inch. A devastating noise falls from your lips, slow and sweet as molasses, your hips buck up off the mattress, trying to take him in. He presses one heavy hand down on your stomach, keeping you still.

“Ask me for it,” Joel whispers darkly, slapping the head over your glistening clit. “Beg for my cock.”

Your fingers curl into the sheets, frustration and desire burning in the inky black of your pupils. “Please, Joel. It’s all I can think about, can only think about you,” you ramble senseslessly, voice breathless. “About you fucking me. About your cock stretching me open. Please fuck me, please, want it so bad.”

Fuck, he loves hearing you beg.

Joel grips your hips, holding you steady as he presses inside, slow at first, just enough to make you gasp, enough to let you feel how thick he is stretching you open. He curses, head falling forward as he watches himself disappear inside you inch by inch.

Your hands scramble along the length of his back, nails scratching uselessly as you try to adjust to the sudden fullness. Joel knows he’s too big, the stretch too much all at once without prep. He knows it. He just doesn’t give a damn.

“I know, it’s a big stretch ain’t it?” Joel coos, his thumbs rubbing soothing circles over the skin of your hips. “You can still take it, darlin’. It’s what you wanted, wanted me to lose my goddamn mind and ruin this sweet little pussy.”

You nod desperately, a loud cry bursting from your chest as he pulls you back until his hips are flush with your ass. Your velvety heat feels scalding around him, snug and perfect, like it was made for him—made for his cock.

“Fuck, baby,” he stays there for a beat, buried to the hilt—forcing you really feel the full, aching stretch before he starts to move. He drags his cock out to the tip, almost all the way, before slamming forward again, knocking the breath from your lungs. “That’s it—take it all, just like that.”

Joel sets a brutal pace, fucking you so deep he swears he must be in your goddamn guts. His grip is merciless, his fingers digging into your hips as he uses them to pull you back against him, meeting every punishing thrust. The dirty sound of skin on skin fills the room, mixing with the slick squelch of your pussy as it tries to suck him back in each time he pulls out, the pretty soft gasps and moans you’re struggling to keep quiet the cherry on top of it all.

It’s so loud, a symphony of lewd sounds bouncing off the walls enough that Joel would be worried that someone might overhear if your house wasn’t such a maze.

Joel watches you writhe beneath him, your back arching, hands grasping at his shoulders, his arms, his hair, desperate for something to hold onto as he fucks into you with ruthless precision. Every thrust sends a shockwave through your body, makes your breath hitch, your legs trembling where they’re locked tight around his waist.

“Poor thing,” he mutters, voice a low rasp in your ear. “Too dumb to talk now, huh? Just layin’ here, takin’ it like a good little whore.”

Your eyes roll back in your head when he tilts his hips, the new angle forcing his cock to rub up against your sweet spot with every thrust. “Joel–”

Joel leans over you, breath hot against your ear as he mutters, “This what you needed, baby? Needed Daddy’s friend to hike your pretty dress up and fuck you good and hard like this?” He speeds his hips up fast enough to get the bed shaking on its frame. “Actin’ like a spoiled little brat all night just so I’d drag you up here and teach you some fuckin’ manners?”

“Yes, yes, yes, fuck—” Your words slur together, breathy and high-pitched, your fingers twisting in his hair as he keeps up that relentless pace.

Joel reaches up to snatch your jaw in a tight grip, the rhythm of his hips never faltering. “Open your mouth,” he growls, fingers digging into the meat of your cheeks meanly. When you don’t, too fucked out of your mind to listen, he shakes your head back and forth like a bad dog. “Open it.”

The command breaks through the pleasure filled haze clouding your mind, and your mouth falls open obediently. Your slick lips parting enough for Joel to see the enticing pink of your tongue. A groan claws its way out from deep in his chest, and he leans down close to spit into your mouth.

Your moan is a high, choked whine as your eyes flutter shut, your pussy squeezing around his cock impossibly tighter.

“Don’t you dare fuckin’ swallow,” he says, fucking into your clenching heat harder. “Hold it right there.”

You open your eyes to stare up at him like he’s some kind of God, your lashes clumped together and glossy with unshed tears—gaze glazed over with a kind of bliss that makes something dark and satisfied wriggle to life in his chest.

“Good girl,” he mutters, barely above a whisper, but the words hit you like a sack of bricks. Your walls squeeze around him, and he groans low in his chest. His hands grip your thighs, spreading you even wider so he can watch the way his cock disappears into your puffy pussy, shining with your slick every time he pulls out. “Look at that. Fuckin’ made to take cock, aren’t you?”

You moan around closed lips, nails digging little crescent moons into his shoulders so hard that he can feel his shirt ripping under the force of it. Joel can tell you’re getting close, your whole body trembling violently as the coil of your orgasm winds tighter and tighter.

“Go ahead and swallow for me, baby girl.” Joel needs to hear you, needs to hear you say his name when you come on his cock. “Wanna hear that pretty voice.”

The sound of you swallowing is music to Joel’s ears, his hips stuttering as he watches your throat work.

“Please,” you gasp, fat crocodile tears rolling down your cheeks. “Need to come, need you to make me—”

“Yes,” he hisses, his thrusts turning sloppy for a beat before he regains his rhythm. “You gonna come for me, baby? Gonna soak my cock nice and good?”

His words push you right over the edge. Your entire body tenses, pleasure rolling through you in a white-hot wave as your climax crashes over you, stealing your breath. You sob Joel’s name, thighs shaking uncontrollably, body shuddering beneath him as you clench down so fucking tight he can barely move.

Joel groans, his jaw going slack as he watches you fall apart, losing himself in the feel of your pussy milking his cock. He grits his teeth, hips snapping erratically as he chases his own release.

“Fuck—gonna fill you up, baby,” he groans, voice wrecked. “Gonna fuck you full of me, make you mine.”

With one last thrust, Joel spills inside of you. He buries himself as deep as he can go, warmth flooding your core as spurt after spurt of come paints your insides, thick and hot. His body shakes with the force of it, a deep, guttural moan falling from his lips as he rides out his orgasm.

Joel just stays there, panting, his forehead resting against yours.

For a moment, both of you are too overwhelmed to move. You just lay on the mattress tangled together in the aftermath, breaths mingling, bodies slick with sweat. Joel smooths his hands up your sides, grounding himself as you both come down from the highs of ecstasy.

When you finally stop shaking, Joel pulls back just enough to look at you, to take in the wrecked, spent look on your face. He brushes his knuckles over your sweaty cheek, softer than before. “Still think I didn’t bring you a present?”

You let out an amused huff, pushing your hands up under the back of his shirt so you can trace the column of his spine with gentle fingers. “Trust me, it’s the only present I’m getting that’ll be worth a damn. Money can’t buy this, Miller.”

Joel chuckles, low and smooth as warmth blooms in his chest. He presses a lingering kiss to your shoulder. “You earned it, baby.”

mini nat's note: thank you so much for reading! mwah.

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clockwayswrites · 11 hours ago

Text

Fresh Birb! Part 32

masterpost

“Thanks for the excuse to get some fresh air,” Danny said. He sounded grateful enough that Jason felt a little bad for using the ‘stroll around the yard’ as an way to gather some intel.

“Hey, trust me, I get how overwhelming the manor can get,” Jason said, “and there are a lot of us in house right now. It’s easier in small doses for sure.”

“I could see that,” Danny agreed. “But there’s also something nice about the full house. It’s all very… alive feeling.”

The words were more melancholy than they should be. They were more like how Jason, who knew the feeling of death all too well, might say them. It brought troubling thoughts to mind.

“Yeah, that can be nice about it. Sure is quieter if I’m not here or at Roy’s,” Jason agreed after maybe too long a moment.

“Is Roy that much more talkative when it’s just the two of you?”

“Oh, no. Well, yeah, but it’s more about his little girl, Lian. She’s three and a half and an absolute handful most days. She’s also at that age where she’s pretty much narrating her own life in half understandable babble so there’s just a lot of constant noise.”

Danny chuckled. “I bet. Stayed with a friend for a bit when I was between jobs and stuck there for a few months by a non-complete clause. Her one kid was that age at the time and the oldest five. I didn’t know just how much everything there was when having kids that age. It made me actually feel a little sorry for my parents.”

“You the youngest, oldest, or middle?”

“Youngest. I’ve got one older sister, Jasmine,” Danny said. “You could sorta say there’s a half a sibling too. I basically grew up with my best friend and there were some weeks I spent more time at his house than ours.”

“That close to him?” Jason asked.

“Yeah. That and it was easier, sometimes, to not be at home.”

“Oh.”

That implied some unfortunate things that Jason hadn’t quite been expecting. Danny seemed pretty well adjusted. He was even good at handling Damian, but Jason supposed that maybe part of that was because Danny had been through his own issues.

Danny just shrugged. “I have a life long friend out of it. We don’t see each other in person much these days since we’re on other sides of the country, but we still talk plenty.”

Jason gave a soft hum and, a beat later, asked, “What made you end up in Gotham of all places?”

“Wayne Enterprises, actually,” Danny said. “The rep in the industry as place to work is unparalleled really, especially for what I want to do.”

“And what’s that?”

“Help people,” Danny said, honestly and with a crooked little smile. “Which I know sounds cheesy, but I really wanted to create things that help people. It’s not like I mind making a better cellphone battery or anything, but it’s nice to know that I get to work on things that help not just with the little, everyday issues but also the big, life changing ones. The fact that those things get to help the city I live in too is a real plus.”

“Gotham has a way of getting to you like that,” Jason said.

“Yeah,” Danny replied softly, gaze in the direction of the Gotham sky line.

And then a scream split the air.

Not a human scream, thankfully, but a repeated screech that had both of them starting and looking around for the source. The screech turned to a warbling clucking as Jerry emerged from behind the landscaping. His tail was high and spread, his wing tips brushed the ground, and he was looking almost shockingly colorful.

“A turkey?”

“Damian’s.”

“Damian has a turkey,” Danny said slowly.

“And a cow,” Jason said. “Cat, dog, a few snakes. He tried to keep a rat but Alfred stopped that pretty quickly.”

Danny rubbed at his temple. “This is why he knew how to take care of wings, isn’t it?”

Jason tried not to smile. “That came up, huh?”

“He’s been sending Bruce information about it,” Danny answered.

Jerry made another loud warble and struck what Jason could only describe as a pose.

“So… does he do this often?”

“His name is Jerry, and nope,” Jason said and pulled out his phone.

Jerry strutted closer to Danny, tail feathers shaking.

“Oh… oh,” Danny said with the tone of someone for who horrible realization was dawning. “Can you, ah, talk him down?”

“I’m afraid I’m morally obligated to film this,” Jason said somberly. He couldn’t hold back his smirk any longer.

Danny shot him a withering look and started to back up towards the Manor. “Really.”

“Really. Good luck.”

“Well, fuck,” Danny said and then took off running.

Jerry followed at top speed with a scream.

Jason sent the video to Bruce. ‘You have competition.’

#dp x dc #birdritch #Danny/Bruce #spirit halloween ship

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memories-of-unknown · 3 days ago

Text

yes, happens, but not all adhd are the same.

for example, I struggled to learn my whole life, but i took extra time, then the other children, and learned for my good grades, even when i supposed to be playing.

so i learned, but never had a feeling how much i know something.

i learned 9 months, literally no seeing family and friends, or very rarely, and being most of the time in my room studying.

anyways, i failed to study psychology (on like 6+ universities, even tho i got one payed year for entrance exams and full scholarship), and at the least moment, I decided to study history to not loose my scholarship.

i studied history, on another language, days and nights long, so I don't fail. we weren't rich.

i ended up doing two exchange programs (that were escaping the monotony of life, and it's very rare, that students are taking part of it twice, but i did 🙈) and got my masters degree. i wasn't with honours, but i had relatively good grades.

i can tell now, that i'm communicating in 4 languages with people, learning became my passion (probs Stockholm Syndrome, but i love to learn now, even in my free time 🙈).

undiagnosed adhd is that you can learn hours with something in the background (needs to be always multi-tasking), but then you cannot watch series/movies without commenting with somebody, so you just don't do it.

doing the same things over and over again is the door of the hell. been there, done that. ended up complaining all the time, sleeping at work and crying from pressure.

i hope my insight will give you courage to deal with adhd, without meds (i tried them, they don't make me focused, just very sleepy so no help in my case), and put a bit more effort to succeed beautiful things in your life afterwards.

God bless.

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juleswritesstuff · 1 day ago

Text

The Pillow Contract

James Potter seems to have found the best pillow on earth. You.

james potter x fem!reader

warnings: none

James liked to consider himself a man of simple pleasures.

A good meal ? Heaven. A lazy Sunday spent wrapped in a blanket burrito ? Perfection. A well-timed, sarcastic remark ? Chef’s kiss.

But above all else, there was one thing James had come to love more than anything in the world.

Your chest.

Well, you as a whole, of course. Body and soul alike. He was not a bloody prick, thank you very much.

He loved you for you, not just for the flawless vessel that carried your golden heart and your beautiful mind.

But he couldn't help the way he was especially drawn to the perfection that peeked from your neckline when your shirt hung a little lower than usual.

And he also could not, in good conscience, ignore the life-altering comfort that was that perfection.

Now, to be clear, James wasn’t just some guy obsessed with his girlfriend’s body –okay, maybe he was a little addicted.

But, come on, who could blame him when you were said girlfriend ?

He was supposed to be a bit obsessed with you, right ? That’s what every person in their sane, right and helplessly in love mind would be about their partner, no ?

Was that just him ?

Ok, fine, maybe he was a bit of a simp (read, you had him at your feet). So what ?

He liked it exactly like that. Sue him.

But this ? This was different.

This wasn’t just about attraction or some primal male instinct. No, this was about something sacred.

This was about comfort.

The kind that he’d accidentally stumbled upon one evening when you had curled up next to him on the couch, and his head had somehow –miraculously– ended up resting right on your chest.

That’s when he had discovered it.

The Holy Grail of pillows. The pinnacle of all headrests.

Your chest was perfect.

Warm. Soft. Inviting.

It had been life-changing. Existence-altering. World-stopping.

And in that moment, with his head resting against the softest, most heavenly cushion known to mankind, and your heart beating under his ear like a lullaby, James had made a decision.

He was never going back to regular pillows again.

Ever.

The problem was, he didn’t exactly know how to turn this into a permanent arrangement without looking like an absolute fool.

Which, really, was ironic, because James didn’t mind acting like the biggest dumbass in the world when it came to you. Not even a tiny bit.

The man had zero shame, and zero chill when you were involved.

If he had to beg ? Done.

If he had to bribe you with kisses ? Oh no, how awful.

If he had to declare his undying devotion in front of his friends and suffer their relentless teasing ? Call Sirius and Remus over, he was ready to suffer.

If he had to wear one of those, frankly quite obnoxious --yes, even for him-- ‘I ❤️ My Girlfriend’ shirts in public just because you wanted him to suffer a bit for forgetting the chores ? Consider it his new favorite outfit.

He’d do anything and everything –yes, even sacrificing his dignity in front of Pads and Moony– if it meant putting a smile on your face (and making you agree to be used as a headrest for the rest of your life. But let’s just say that was a teeny, tiny, wonderful bonus if the case ever came to be).

Tonight was his chance, he told himself.

You were already curled up on the couch, wearing one of his hoodies, your legs tucked beneath you as you scrolled through your phone. The dim lighting of the room cast a soft glow over you, and James took a moment to appreciate the scene.

Because, honestly ? You looked really good.

Too good.

Like, unfairly good.

The hoodie –his hoodie, the one he had technically claimed as his favorite, but which spent more time on your body than his closet– was slightly oversized on you, slipping off one shoulder in a way that made his brain short-circuit for a second.

This was his moment.

You were comfortable. The couch was comfortable.

And your chest ? Well, that was a level of bliss he had yet to find anywhere else in the world.

Time to execute: Operation Smothered by Heaven.

Ok, the name was a little ridiculous. But, to his defence, he had been a little distracted while thinking about it –the dress you were wearing mysteriously met the floor not even five minutes after he had taken a glimpse of you– and his brain had refused to work at his full potential.

Something that he absolutely couldn’t let happen now.

Not when the fate of his comfort and sanity was at such a high risk.

That’s why he casually –so casually– stretched like a giant cat just waking up from a nap, letting out an exaggerated yawn before –still ever so nonchalantly, of course– leaning closer.

And would you look at that ? His head, as if drawn by an invisible magnetic force he absolutely had no control on –God forbid– found its way to your chest.

It was seamless.

Flawless execution.

Absolutely fucking nailed that.

He gave himself a mental high five.

Operation Smothered by Heaven: officially successful.

“Wow. Smooth” you blinked down at him, amused.

James grinned but didn’t move. Not even an inch. Nope.

He had claimed his rightful place, and there was no going back now.

“What can I say ? Gravity is a powerful thing” he purred, his voice smug, his eyes half-lidded like a cat who had just found the warmest sunspot in the house.

“Ah, I see. So this is all gravity’s fault, then ?”

“Absolutely” he confirmed, burrowing his face in just a little more “I have no control over it. Pure science”

You snorted, shaking your head, but you didn’t push him away.

Of course you didn’t.

If anything, you shifted slightly, letting your arm drape around his back, your fingers absentmindedly tracing along his spine. He hummed in approval, his whole body melting against yours like ice under the warm sunlight of a summer’s day.

Because the thing James didn’t know –or, at the very least, seemed to forget– was that he wore his heart on his sleeve. Always.

James Potter and secret scheming ? Not a good match.

Not a match at all, actually. But you still liked watching him try.

And with the way he had been ogling you for the past week, it really wasn’t hard to figure out what had been brewing in that ridiculously pretty head of his.

His thoughtful frown, the way his brows scrunched together, his deep-in-thought lip-biting. James had looked like he was trying to crack some highly classified government code.

Except the code in question was you.

Or, more specifically, that area right below your neck that seemed to steal his attention more times then it should've been considered healthy.

Subtle, he was not.

He had been studying you. Analyzing the way your sweaters dipped lower when you leaned forward, the way the fabric of your shirts clung to your curves, the way–

God.

James had the audacity to look like he was pondering the meaning of life when, really, all he was trying to find was an excuse.

Funny how he could’ve just asked.

It wasn’t like you would have refused him.

Hell, you didn’t even think you possessed the ability to refuse him. To refuse him anything, really.

But your smitten and extremely down-bad behavior when it came to your boyfriend was a topic for another time.

James let out a deep, satisfied sigh.

“You know” he murmured, voice slightly muffled as he nuzzled closer “I think I’ve discovered something important”

“Oh ?”

“Mhm” he tilted his head up, his expression dead serious. Like a man delivering a life-changing revelation “Your chest ? Best pillow I’ve ever used”

You raised an eyebrow, a quiet grin making its way onto your mouth. “I should be flattered, I think”

“You should be honored” he corrected, his lips quirking into a lazy smirk “I mean, it’s a very competitive market. But yours ? Easily top-tier”

You rolled your eyes, but you couldn’t hide the smile tugging at your lips. “Is that right ?”

James nodded solemnly.

“Hell yeah, baby. I’d even write a five-star Yelp review if that were a thing”

You let out a soft laugh and slid your fingers into his hair, gently scratching at his scalp.

James immediately melted.

He let out a low, contented hum, eyes slipping shut, the tension in his body dissolving completely. You thought if he was a cat, he would’ve started purring.

“Mmh. Keep doing that, and I might never get up” he mumbled, voice already laced with drowsiness.

“Wouldn’t mind that” you teased.

Because, really, who in their right mind would complain about this ?

No one, that's who.

And surely not you.

James hummed in response, his arms tightening around your waist burying himself further into you. You could feel the steady rise and fall of his breathing, the warmth of his body seeping into yours.

His lips brushed absentmindedly against your collarbone –a barely-there press of warmth that sent a quiet shiver down your spine.

This. This was perfection.

Then, because James Potter simply could not help himself, he tilted his head up again.

“So, uh... just out of curiosity. How often do you think I can get away with this ?”

You smirked. “That depends”

“On ?”

“How well you behave”

James’ eyes darkened slightly, though amusement still played at the edges.

“Define behave” his voice dropped, all smooth and teasing, like he could coax an answer out of you if he said it just right.

You arched a brow, pretending to think.

“Well, let’s see. No stealing the blankets at night. No pretending you don’t hear me when I ask you to grab something from the kitchen. And definitely no distracting me when I’m trying to get work done”

James gasped, offended.

“That last one is unreasonable and you know it”

You laughed, shaking your head. “Oh, is it ?”

“Yes. It is literally part of my rights as your boyfriend to distract you”

You hummed, pretending to ponder your decision.

“Well, if we can do nothing about that…” your hand cupped his cheek, slender fingers applying a gentle pressure to lift his face up from that cocoon of warmth he had nestled himself into.

He blinked. “I-wait. What ?”

Before he could fully register what was happening, you leaned down and captured his lips in a slow, lazy kiss.

James melted.

Like, gone. Out of commission. Absolute goner.

The smug confidence he had a second ago ? Obliterated.

His hands, which had been lazily resting at your waist, tightened, pulling you closer like he never wanted to let go. One of them trailed up your spine, fingers tangling into your hair, holding you there like this was oxygen and he needed it to breathe.

You sighed against his lips, feeling the way James shuddered, the way his grip on you tightened, like he was physically trying to keep himself from falling apart.

Like you had just ruined him.

And maybe you had.

Because when you pulled back just enough to catch your breath, James just blinked at you, dazed and utterly wrecked, lips still parted like he hadn’t quite caught up with reality yet.

You bit back a smirk.

Unbelievable.

How had this man made a full-time career out of turning you into putty, and yet one well-placed kiss had him looking like he’d just been personally blessed by the universe ?

You dragged your fingers lazily through his curls, watching the way his lashes fluttered at the sensation, the slow, dopey grin tugging at his lips.

Completely gone.

You tilted your head, murmuring teasingly against his mouth “Was that up to your standards, Mr. Five-Star Review ?”

James, still grinning –and still absolutely useless– just nodded.

"Five stars ? That was worth the entire Milky Way, baby"

You let out a laugh, and James practically glowed at the sound, his fingers flexing against your waist like he wanted to bottle it.

Then, before you could say anything else, he tilted his head, brushing his nose against yours in that infuriatingly sweet way of his.

"You know-" he murmured, voice all warm and syrupy "-if this is part of my reward system, I promise to be so good"

You smirked, fingers tracing idle patterns into the back of his neck. “Do you now ?”

James nodded solemnly, though the grin he was fighting gave him away.

“The best. Model citizen. Proper gentleman. Will hold doors, carry bags, call you milady unironically if I have to”

You snorted. Loudly.

"Now that, I need to see"

James hummed, tilting his head up like he was about to deliver the most profound statement of his life.

“Mmh. Maybe after another kiss”

Your eyes narrowed playfully. “That so ?”

He nodded again, already leaning in, his lips curling mischievously.

You let your fingers drag slowly down the back of his neck, feeling the way James shivered under your touch.

The moment stretched, thick with something warm and electric, the air between you charged in that intoxicating way it always was whenever you teased him like this.

You leaned in deliberately, lips hovering just over his, close enough that you could feel the ghost of his breath, the heat radiating off his skin.

James, for all his usual smugness, stilled, his lazy smirk faltering into something softer, deeper. His lips parting slightly, his pupils dark and expectant.

Waiting.

Wanting.

You let your gaze drop to his lips, watching as his tongue darted out just once, a quick, unconscious flick, like he was already tasting the kiss before it happened.

And, God, he was beautiful like this.

All that usual bravado stripped down to this, his sharp edges melted, his hands twitching slightly where they rested on your hips, fighting the urge to pull you closer.

His restraint was admirable.

His patience ?

Well. That was something you just had to test.

You leaned in that final inch –only for your lips to land on his cheek instead.

Soft. Chaste. Infuriating.

James let out a dramatic, suffering groan, his head thunking back against the cushions.

“Tease” he mumbled, voice hoarse, his hands finally losing their battle as they gripped your waist, fingers pressing into your sides like he was physically holding back the urge to grab your face and kiss you properly.

You pulled back just enough to grin down at him, impossibly pleased with yourself.

“What ?” you asked innocently, tilting your head “You asked for a kiss. You didn’t specify where, love”

James cracked one eye open, glowering.

“Oh, that’s dirty” he grumbled, before huffing dramatically and rolling onto his back, taking you with him.

You yelped as you landed against his chest, sprawled across him, your laughter cut off when his arms wrapped around you, pinning you against him with the strength of a human vice grip.

“James-”

“Nope” he said, shoving his face into your neck like a petulant child, muffling his words “You’re stuck here now. Actions have consequences”

You laughed, wiggling in his hold, but he just tightened his grip.

“James”

“Mmm. Nope”

“I-”

“Shh. Thinking about my suffering”

You rolled your eyes, smiling despite yourself, your fingers naturally finding their way into his curls again, scratching lightly at his scalp.

He made a sound, deep and content, his body practically melting beneath you.

“See ?” you teased, voice softening “That wasn’t so bad”

James exhaled heavily, but his hands had already started skimming over your back again, lazy and unbothered, like he’d completely forgotten why he was fake-pouting in the first place.

“Mmh” he hummed “Don't know. Still feel like you owe me”

You smirked, arching a brow. “Oh ?”

“Yeah” James sighed dramatically, finally tilting his head up again. Looking at you.

That expression.

Soft. Mischievous. A little challenging.

Maybe even a little hopeful.

Like he was just waiting for you to put him out of his misery.

You let the moment stretch for a beat longer, lips quirking.

Then, with a small, amused sigh, you finally gave in.

And kissed him properly.

For a few moments, the two of you just stayed like that, tangled together, basking in the warmth of each other’s touch.

You felt him smile against your lips before he pulled back just enough to murmur “So… hear me out”

“Oh boy” you sighed, already knowing.

James just grinned, completely unbothered by your lack in faith in him.

“What if we made this a permanent arrangement ?”

You let out a soft laugh, tilting your head at him. “A permanent arrangement ?”

“Yeah. Like, an official thing. A contract, even” he lifted his head slightly, hie expression the picture of seriousness “Something binding. A legally recognized agreement that states you will be my official human pillow for the foreseeable future”

You stared at him, an eyebrow quirked in amusement, lips twitiching.

“You want to draft a pillow contract ?”

James nodded, almost professionally.

“For accountability purposes”

You rolled your eyes, a disbelieved chuckle leaving your lips before you could stop it.

“You’re ridiculous”

“But lovable” he pointed out.

You exhaled, shaking your head, your heart betraying you with the sheer amount of fondness you felt for this man.

“Fine” you relented, rolling your eyes as if you weren’t already completely gone for him “You win. You can rest on me whenever you want”

James grinned like he’d just won the lottery, wasting no time in smacking a quick, eager kiss right on your lips.

“But” you added, poking him in the ribs “I reserve the right to move if you start drooling”

“Excuse me ?” James gasped, offended “I do not drool”

You smirked. “That’s not what the couch cushions say”

James gasped again, dramatically this time, like you had personally insulted his honor “That was one time-”

“Oh, it so wasn’t”

James pouted, pulling you even closer and pressing his forehead against yours with a grumble.

“You wound me” he muttered, a mock distraught lilt to his voice.

You grinned, the warmth of him, the smell of him, completely surrounding you as you pressed a kiss to his jaw, lingering just enough to feel the way his breath hitched.

“I think you’ll survive just fine”

James hummed, tilting his head slightly, inviting you to keep going.

So you did.

You let your lips trail along his jawline, slow and lazy, your fingers threading through the curls at the nape of his neck, scratching lightly in a way that made him melt.

“Well” James sighed, voice lower, heavier, the tiniest shiver running through him “If this is how you comfort me, I guess I’ll forgive you”

You laughed against his skin.

“How generous”

James smirked, but there was something else in his eyes now, something wicked, something that sparked just before–

Before the menace shimmied down.

Yes. Shimmied. Like a man with a mission.

“James-”

Your protest was cut off by laughter, because he was determined, wriggling lower and lower with expert precision, slipping out of your hold like a human-sized golden retriever trying to find the perfect spot on the couch.

And then, with a triumphant sigh, his head landed where he had been aiming all along–

Right on your chest.

James let out a deep, satisfied hum, snuggling in, his nose nuzzling into the soft fabric of your shirt like this was some long-lost paradise he had just returned to.

“Now we’re talking” he exhaled in sheer satisfaction, like the heaviest of weights had been lifted from his shoulders, snuggling even deeper, and muttering an appreciative “Mmh. Yep. Definitely five stars”

You blinked down at him, helpless to fight the way your heart swelled, a smile threatening to bloom against your better judgment.

“Should I start charging you for this service ?” you teased.

James hummed, content, his lips brushing absently against the skin just below your collarbone.

“I’d go broke, baby”

You let out a soft, breathy laugh, your fingers finding their way back into his hair, your nails scratching lightly at his scalp.

James groaned, pressing his face deeper into your chest, mumbling something incoherent that you were pretty sure translated to never stop doing that.

Before you could fully process how utterly whipped this man was, he pressed a soft, lingering kiss there –just because he could.

You pulled back slightly, blinking down at the mop of messy chocolate strands currently buried between your collarbones.

“Do you make a habit of kissing all your pillows ?” you asked, voice mildly amused despite the unreasonable warmth now flooding your chest.

James, completely unashamed, grinned against you.

“Pillows don’t usually deserve appreciation, but this one ?” his fingers traced slow, lazy patterns against your waist, his voice dropping to a reverent murmur “This one gets special treatment”

A full-body shiver rolled through you.

And James, that absolute menace, felt it.

His smirk was obnoxiously satisfied as he nuzzled in even deeper, practically purring as he molded himself further against you.

You rolled your eyes, trying –truly trying– to ignore the overwhelming affection clawing at your ribcage. And utterly failing.

“Jamie, you’re gonna choke like this” you warned playfully, fighting against yourself not to let out the endeared laugh threatening to spill.

James made a noncommittal noise, fully unbothered.

“Best way to go, honestly”

And that was it.

Not one beat missed. Not a single ounce of shame registered in his voice.

You stared wide-eyed at the mop of untamable chocolate curls right below your chin, completely bewildered by the words that had just come out of your boyfriend’s mouth.

Did this man, the actual lover of your life, just casually declare that he would willingly –no, gladly– perish via boob-related asphyxiation ?

Because that was what it sounded like.

Was that a normal thing for a person to say ?

No. No, it wasn’t.

And yet—here you were.

"James"

“Mmm ?”

"James, get up"

"No"

You sighed, trying to nudge him off, but it was useless.

Because this man –this grown, six-foot, sport-trained, annoyingly fit man– was currently clinging to you like a koala experiencing its first-ever existential crisis.

And you knew –you knew– that there was no reasoning with a man who had just fully committed to making your chest his final resting place.

"James-"

"No"

"You cannot suffocate yourself on my–"

"I can and I will"

"You will not"

James lifted his head just enough to look at you with actual betrayal.

"How dare you harm a man in his final moments ?"

A stunned laugh escaped before you could stop it.

“Oh my god, you’re ridiculous”

James smirked triumphantly.

“And yet-” he murmured smugly “-you don’t seem to mind it”

He barely gave you a second to respond before he nuzzled right back in, burrowing into your chest like you were some long-lost paradise he had finally returned to.

You stared at the ceiling, dead inside.

How was this your life ?

You used to have dignity.

You used to be a strong, independent person.

And yet, somehow –somehow– you had become a glorified human mattress for your very large and very needy boyfriend.

And the worst part ?

You didn’t even mind.

You sighed deeply, fingers slipping into his hair against your better judgment. James melted immediately, exhaling in a way that was obscenely pleased. Like if he were any more relaxed, he'd have dissolved into a puddle of mushy, lovesick goo.

Then, with the solemnity of a man about to deliver a groundbreaking presidential address, he cleared his throat.

You barely had time to register the shift before he–

“Ladies” James began, his voice smooth, reverent “It’s always a pleasure”

Your mouth fell open.

Did he just–

Oh, for fuck’s sake.

“I just wanted to take a moment to express my deepest gratitude” he continued talking to your breasts, completely ignoring the look of utter disbelief and sheer horror plastered on your face and sighing dramatically “For your service. For your warmth. For providing me with the best naps of my life”

Your soul, quite frankly, left your body, just straight-up abandoned you.

“James–”

He shushed you.

Shushed you.

“I’m having a moment with my girls, baby” he whispered, like he was delivering a speech at fucking Buckingham Palace.

You gaped at him. “You are not-”

“I am” he placed a hand over his heart “They deserve it”

You had never contemplated murder so seriously in your life.

James, completely unbothered, pressed on.

“I promise to treat you with the respect and admiration you deserve. To appreciate your softness in all its glory. To-” he paused, tilting his head “Actually, I feel like I should name you”

“For the love of God, James. Don’t you dare-”

James gasped.

Gasped.

“That’s a brilliant idea. Baby, why haven’t we named them ?”

You smacked his arm, your eyes so wide they threatened to fall out of your skull. “Because they are literally attached to my body ?!”

But he wasn’t listening. No, the absolute menace was thinking, brows furrowed in deep concentration.

“They deserve names that reflect their greatness. Something regal. Something powerful”

He snapped his fingers. “Got it. Thelma and Louise”

You groaned. “Absolutely fucking not”

James ignored you.

“Or maybe Hall and Oates ?”

“I- What- Aren’t they both men ?”

“Gender’s nothing but a social construct, darling”

“Ok-”

A sudden gasp interrupted you, as if he had just discovered the meaning of life itself.

"Baby- Baby, I’ve got it"

You sighed, already regretting everything. "James, no"

"Yes" he insisted, eyes alight with the thrill of an idiot about to say something profoundly stupid "Bonnie and Clyde"

You blinked. Once. Twice.

"You want to name ‘your girls’ after two actual criminals ?"

James nodded solemnly, as if he were making the most reasonable suggestion in the world. "Iconic criminals. Star-crossed lovers. Thrill-seekers. Just like us, babe"

"Just like us ?" you repeated, incredulous "James, they literally died in a hail of bullets"

"Tragic, right ?" he sighed dramatically, resting his cheek against your chest. "Just two outlaws against the world. Inseparable. Madly in love. Probably great at robbing banks"

You stared at him, completely dead inside. "Are you about to compare my chest to a highly coordinated armed robbery ?"

James lifted his head just enough to grin at you.

"Well” he mused, eyes twinkling “they did steal my heart"

You were done. So done, in fact, that you just gave up entirely.

"I cannot believe this is my life" you muttered, shoving your hands over your face.

James, the absolute menace, took this as encouragement and nuzzled back in, pressing obnoxiously reverent kisses between his newly christened 'Bonnie and Clyde'.

"Rest easy, my loves" he murmured dramatically "Your legacy shall live on"

"James-"

"Shhh" he hushed, patting your side "They're outlaws, baby. They don’t play by the rules"

At that point, you seriously considered pushing him off the couch. Or out the window.

Maybe both.

You shook your head, defeated, completely annihilated by your boyfriend’s questionable choices.

James grinned, entirely too pleased with himself.

“Oh, come on. I’m just having a bit of fun” he chuckled lightheartedly, turning his attention back to your chest with the solemnity of a man who had just finished writing a best-selling novel “Well, ladies, whatever your names may be, just know –you have my eternal devotion”

And then, as if he hadn’t just committed the most embarrassing crime against you, he nestled back in with a satisfied hum.

You stared down at him, deadpan.

“You’re an actual menace”

“And yet, despite that, you love me” he mumbled, already half-asleep.

You sighed, your fingers automatically sliding into his hair once again. It took him less than two seconds to turn into a puddle, his entire body going limp as he exhaled in the most ridiculously pleased way possible, like he had just been given an award for the best nap ever.

“Unfortunately” you muttered, your heart melting just a little bit too, because, yes, he was a ridiculous man, but he was your ridiculous man.

And, as much as you complained, you couldn’t deny it --having James like this, warm and completely wrapped around you, was its own kind of perfect.

The Pillow Contract (Unofficially Signed & Approved)

Clause 1: James gets unlimited chest pillow privileges.

Clause 2: Y/n reserves the right to kick James off if he drools in his sleep.

Clause 3: Cuddles are mandatory.

Clause 4: James won't ever refer to Y/n's chest as ‘Bonnie and Clyde’ again. Penalty: annulment of Clause 1.

Hello beautiful people 💗

I have no idea of where this thing spouted from. It popped in my head, and I had to bring it to the world 😂.

This is my first attempt at a more humorous type of fic. I had so much fun writing it, and I really hope it didn't downright suck, and you had a good time reading it, too.

Let me know what you think!

Thank you for reading, and I'll catch you in the next one <3

280 notes · View notes

ssa-dado · 2 days ago

Text

Burgandy Swim Cap

triathlon!Aaron Hotchner x fleabag!reader Genre: meet-a-cute but you're mainly just ogling at Hotch as he swims in a speedo. Summary: You know those encounters that last, like, five seconds where literally nothing happens but still manage to blossom into a full-blown crush? Yeah. That. Partly because you're chronically single. Partly because you’re starved for attention. Mostly because you saw him in a speedo. A tight speedo. A tight, half-metallic speedo. A tight, half-metallic, very low-waisted speedo. So really, it’s not a crush, it’s cause and effect. Also… he’s a dad. Too. Warnings: objectification of the Hotchner body (called out twice for not having an ass, affectionately), implied age gap, sexual jokes and cuss words Word Count: 4.7k Dado's Corner: I genuinely don’t know how to tag the reader... but she’s giving me fleabag energy… so, uhmmm, let’s roll with that. Huge thanks and smooches to @hotchology for developing and proofreading the snippets I dropped in your dms at 11 pm unprompted 🧎‍♀️

masterlist(s)

It’s not your fault you’re staring out the cafeteria window that just so happens to overlook the pool. You’re literally facing it. What else are you supposed to do - dislocate your neck inhumanly to look the other way?

That window was meant for people-watching.

Specifically, for anxious parents to spy on their kids mid-paddle without interrupting the lesson every time little Aiden coughs. It’s not your fault you’re childless and currently repurposing the feature to ogle burgundy-swim-cap guy in lane four.

You’re just… respecting the building’s original design intent.

You needed the distraction. Desperately.

Because beside you, your friend is once again delivering the extended director’s cut of that five-minute interaction with the guy she’s allegedly, absolutely, 100% over.

The conversation happened three months ago.

You know this.

Because she has broken it down line by line for three months.

Every pause. Every blink.

So maybe you are a bad friend. Possibly a terrible person. Because while she unpacks every microscopic detail of his “Oh, I’m sorry I stepped on your toe”, you’re mentally calculating burgundy-swim-cap guy’s exact height.

From twelve feet up. Through water. And glass.

And okay… maybe it’s not just the height.

Maybe it’s also the length of his... arms.

Arms.

His arms.

Long, sinuous things slicing through the water like art. Like poetry. Like that one ballet you pretended to enjoy but secretly napped through.

This is different. This is science. You’re just appreciating form. Physics. Hydrodynamics, anatomy, geometry… all the -ometrics.

You’re not objectifying. You’re observing. A selfless academic pursuit, really.

Especially when he glides under one, two, three lane dividers in a single breath, back muscles shifting and flexing with each kick.

And God… his back. You can’t stop staring at it.

Wide. Solid. Disproportionately large, especially considering the man has absolutely zero ass. None. Negative ass. Just ten uninterrupted feet of legs. Stunning.

But it’s the manners that do it.

Because the moment he reaches the ladder and sees the lady from lane one headed there too?

He pauses. Actually waits. Even though he got there first. Doesn’t try to squeeze past her or pretend he didn’t see - no, he stops.

Gives her space. Gestures her to go. Looks away, even.

Eyes politely drifting up the tiled wall, to the stands below you where the suburban invasion of moms has taken hold, to the bright flags swaying just behind the cafeteria window -

Until he lifts his head a little too high.

Fuck… did he just catch you mid-stare? You can’t tell. The goggles - those hideous, mirrored cheap goggles - reflect everything and nothing at once.

Maybe he sees you.

Maybe he doesn’t.

Maybe your face is just a blurry little ghost in his periphery.

Either way, your entire body goes hot and rigid. You peel your eyes away - casually, discreetly, nod to your friend to pretend you’re still listening to her - but not entirely.

You still watch. You have to.

Because he’s about to rise from the pool. And you need to see it.

For research purposes.

For the sacred cause of scientific accuracy. You have to confirm if your earlier measurements were correct the moment he steps out of the water.

They weren’t.

Because he’s bigger. So much bigger.

You can’t tell exactly by how much, though, because the moment his biceps flex - thick and veiny - as he hauls himself up the ladder, your brain just… packs its bags and leaves.

Bye.

All higher function is instantly rerouted to the way the water clings to him - refuses to let go, even gravity is struggling to move on.

(Honestly? Fair. You wouldn’t want to let go either… you’re actually kind of jealous.)

Jealous of how those droplets trace his body - how most of them drip obediently, following the grooves of his muscles, but some linger. They pool in the thick mat of dark curls across his chest, clinging for dear life.

And why wouldn’t they? He’s covered in them.

A slick, glistening mess of wet hair clings to his pecs - dark curls matted down and glinting under the pool lights, looking so soft and stupidly biteable you could probably get arrested just for thinking about it.

Then the curls start to gather. Real organized.

Forming this tidy relatively thin line that runs straight down the center of his chest, gliding over the elegant suggestion of abs - not shredded, but sculpted. Classy, if that’s even possible.

The line of hair dips past his belly button and practically screams into your long-gone neural functions: lick here.

(And you would. With honor. For science. For the flag.)

Because then the trail spreads at his waistband, curling out along his obliques, a pair of sirens luring you to the main event: his very, very low-waisted speedo.

Duo-chrome. Black and something... metallic. Wicked.

The black half pretends to behave.

It lies to your face, “Look at me, look at me,” it says. “I’m discreet. I’m functional. I’m keeping things tasteful.”

But it’s a filthy little traitor. Because right next to it, the metallic side is doing everything but staying subtle. It wasn’t camouflaging a damn thing.

Topography: fully visible. The contour. The definition. The godforsaken outline.

Traceable. With a pencil.

Or your tongue.

Preferably your tongue.

Preferably slow. Possibly kneeling. Definitely grateful.

Because whatever anatomical miracle is happening beneath that lycra – truly might be the eighth wonder of the world built between two hipbones.

These are sickeningly good dick proportions.

Burgandy Swim Cap guy peels off the ugly goggles.

Be fucking damned. That is a hell of a face.

The suction rings frame his eyes - tender little indents where he clearly strapped those goggles too tight.

He’s a try-hard.

A confirmed overachiever - you can tell. It’s in the way he did those laps earlier - efficient, ruthless, mechanical - and in the speed too. Like every stroke was on a timer. Like there was something at stake.

Is burgundy-swim-cap guy training for something?

Maybe he’s a professional swimmer.

Maybe he’s training for a triathlon. The 2012 Olympics in London. A shot at some world record no one else cares about.

Maybe he’s an eldest son.

Maybe he’s got a dad who never said “I’m proud of you” without a follow-up critique.

Maybe he’s still trying to earn praise that never came.

Maybe it’s daddy issues - maybe it’s mommy issues. Issues… in general.

Maybe he’s spent his whole life needing to be exceptional just to feel enough.

Maybe he’s been through a heartbreak. A divorce. A loss.

Maybe he just has a lot of feelings and refuses to talk about any of them unless he’s actively swimming them to death.

Or maybe he’s just that guy - the kind who doesn’t do anything unless he can do it at 120%, even when no one’s watching. Especially when no one’s watching.

Maybe he holds himself to impossible standards because he doesn’t know how not to. Who swims like this because it’s the one place he can fail in private.

Who knows. Who cares.

He’s just a guy.

A man.

A stranger you’ve never even spoken to.

You don’t know his name, his voice, anything.

And yet, there’s something about him.

Something in the slope of his nose, in the way his flushed cheeks are still chasing the rhythm of his pulse, in the rise and fall of his chest. It’s not bodybuilder-big, not exaggerated - but it feels massive.

Maybe it’s just because it’s him.

Because every breath he takes stretches that hairy chest just a little wider, a little broader, until the space around you feels like it’s shrinking, like there’s not enough air left in the room that isn’t his.

You’re fine. You are totally fine.

You’re also clenching your thighs for absolutely no reason. None.

Until - he removes the burgundy swim cap.

Now you do have a reason.

Because beneath it is this obscene head of raven-black hair.

Thick. Damp. Unruly.

Some of it’s clinging to his forehead, but the rest is sticking out in a thousand different directions like it doesn’t give a single shit about streamlining or aerodynamics.

He looks deliciously messy.

But he doesn’t let it stay.

No, he runs his hand through it almost immediately, slicking it back, a man who cannot stand the chaos of hair across his eyes, he can’t stand being out of place.

Control freak. Freak in general.

That tracks.

Still hot.

Hotter.

And still, he doesn’t play to the crowd.

He could - he should - scan the room, make eye contact, maybe throw in a wink or a casual flex. He could at least give a nod to the fact that half the people on this side of the glass are currently 1,461 words deep into mentally drafting smutty fiction with him as the main character.

But no.

He just looks down, slides into his pathetic little (from where you’re standing… sitting.) pool slippers, and rushes toward the changing rooms like he’s late to something.

A loser. An absolute loser.

It’s the hottest thing you’ve ever seen.

You’re completely captivated - so much so that, when your friend finally finishes her emotional postmortem and disappears down the corridor toward the pool, you subtly change seats to get a better view of the hallway.

A strategic move, just in case burgundy-swim-cap guy decides he’s earned a post-swim coffee after all that aquatic foreplay you projected onto him from the safety of your horny little imagination.

Well. You’re getting coffee, at least. You deserve a reward. A hot, mildly burnt one.

You’ve been through a lot.

Except it’s possibly the worst line you’ve ever stood in because you had the genius idea to go for caffeine at the exact same time the children’s swim class ended.

Now you’re trapped - shoulder to shoulder with a damp, shrieking mob of underdeveloped humans all demanding hot dogs, pizza, cheeseburgers, and, from the look in one child’s eyes, possibly the cashier’s soul.

You’ve entered a purgatory of sticky fingers and pure indecision, where time slows and the line somehow clogs even more with every passing second.

It’s not their fault - children are absolute demons in Crocs. They don’t know what they want. They pause. They backtrack.

One child is negotiating for “just the cheese from the cheeseburger, but on a hot dog bun,” and you are watching, in real time, the unraveling of Western civilization.

…You hate that you respect the innovation.

It’s fine. You’re fine.

You just really, really don’t want to miss Burgundy Swim Cap Guy if he happens to pass by - maybe in jeans, maybe (if there’s any justice left in the universe) grey sweatpants, or a hoodie two sizes too big.

Something casual. Unassuming.

Something that dares to cover everything you now know is under there - and somehow makes it worse.

Something that’s the reason your mouth is dry and you’re stuck in this line, mentally begging for something warm to wrap your lips around and feel vaguely hydrated again.

You’re trying to be patient. You’re trying not to hate the one kid crying because his juice is too red and his dad fumbling with his wallet.

You’re a monster. The worst kind of person.

These kids are innocent.

They’re not responsible for the slow-burn, will-they-won’t-they fantasy you’ve constructed entirely in your touch-starved brain - just to distract yourself from the fact that you haven’t been held in actual, human arms in months, your last situationship ended because they “forgot they weren’t single,” the closest thing you’ve had to intimacy this year was a barista remembering your name – once - and, okay, technically there was also that one time a man with a van asked if you “liked adventure,” but you don’t count that unless you're feeling especially pathe-

“That’ll be $2.50,” says the cashier.

Snaps you instantly back to the cruel reality where the only thing you're taking home tonight is a stupid plastic bracelet that’s already cutting into your wrist and the lingering scent of disinfectant.

(Good luck taking that away.)

You hand him a twenty.

He looks at you, deadpan, like he’s about to ask if your sad little wallet also holds the answer to the mental math problem he just did in half a second - the kind of calculation only a man with a degree in math or engineering could do, now tragically stuck working in a depressing public pool cafeteria.

Not even a cool street café. No latte art. No jazz music. Just chlorine and despair.

You give him a sheepish half-smile.

The twenty is all you had.

Okay - technically you had 50 cents too.

Maybe.

In loose change that’s probably fused with gum wrappers and lint at the bottom of your bag but explaining that feels like a one-way ticket to having a burnt cappuccino tossed in your face.

It’s 2011. Surely cafeterias still carry change.

…Apparently not.

“Card?” he asks.

You have exactly $1.78 on your card. You know this because you checked this morning, like the responsible adult you pretend to be.

This is bad.

This is humiliating.

This is the exact kind of character-building moment that turns into a core memory your brain will randomly replay at 3 a.m. for the next seven years.

The kids behind you are screaming. (Except one. One child is calmly and confidently negotiating a pizza-inside-a-burger situation with his father, who looks like he lost custody in the divorce and also in this conversation.)

And then there are the dads, too. You can feel them. Judging you.

You don’t even need to turn around.

Which is a shame, really. Because you love dads. You’re hopelessly, helplessly, filthily attracted to dads.

Hot dads? Daddy dads? Men with crow’s feet and deep voices who say things like “I’ll take care of it” and mean it? Slightly emotionally unavailable men with strong forearms, guilt complexes, and unresolved trauma they process exclusively through precision lawn edging and Sunday barbecue duty?

Inject that straight into your bloodstream.

You want them tired. You want them emotionally repressed. You want them to carry patio furniture like it weighs nothing and grunt when they sit down. You want to be a problem.

But these dads?

Their suburban dad disapproval is so potent it might as well be playing on loop over the intercom right between announcements for lost goggles and swim meet fundraisers.

These dads would ask about your five-year plan, nod thoughtfully, then ghost you via a LinkedIn message.

These dads are not for you.

These dads can go.

And so you panic. Sweat. Freeze. Until-

A hand.

A large hand.

Chubby-fingered, hairy, left-handed and wrapped in the crisp white cuff of a very expensive white shirt, peeking out from an even more expensive black suit jacket.

There’s a Rolex on his wrist. A real one.

That same hand, gentle and unbothered, slides a credit card (which looks comically small in those thick fingers, by the way) right into the reader, where $2.50 is already floating on the screen.

“I got it,” says a voice.

Oh.

Oh no.

It’s deep. Unreasonably deep. The kind of voice that should be illegal before noon.

And soft, too, absurdly soft for how deep it is because the vibrations travel straight from your ear to your… there. There, there.

You turn. Slowly.

And there he is.

A man.

(Surprise!)

Not just a man – a Man. Capital M, bolded, underlined, possibly trademarked if your bank account could handle the licensing fee.

He’s in a suit. In a full suit. Black jacket. White shirt. Burgundy tie.

You blink… wait is that- no way.

It’s him.

It’s Burgundy Swim Cap Guy.

Now in Burgundy Tie.

He matched.

Goddamn it. What a loser. What a hot, meticulous loser.

Oh, Burgundy Swim Cap man.

Yeah, let’s get that correction in there. Man.

Because up close, in proper daylight and expensive tailoring, he’s clearly way older than he looked in the pool. Deliciously older kind of old.

… And here you thought he was your age. (You were wrong. Again.)

All the better.

You barely recognize him in this polished version of himself - drenched in a cologne that costs more than your monthly grocery budget and somehow isn’t obnoxious.

It’s that expensive.

It’s not that aquatic bullshit guys in finance wear.

No. It’s warm. Inviting. Woodsy. A little smoky.

Expensive in the way that makes you want to bury your face in his neck and inhale until you black out while pretending you weren’t about to fall in love over his clavicle. (Yeah… too specific?)

And beneath it - just a trace - chlorine.

God help you.

You’re going to die here.

He even has a cowlick. A perfectly smoothed cowlick.

The kind that clearly took time, effort, wrist action, and probably a round brush.

He blow-dries.

He has a routine. A regimen. He has systems.

He’s probably terrifying in the morning. The kind of man who folds things. The kind who knows where his passport is right now.

Now, now.

But now he’s looking at you, brows thick, slightly furrowed.

Do you have something on your face? No. Can’t be.

No, you’ve just been staring at him like a feral raccoon. You still haven’t spoken.

…right.

“…Thank you,” you manage, barely audible - just as his phone starts ringing in his jacket pocket.

Drowned out by technology. Your gratitude swallowed by a default ringtone, who would have ever guessed.

He pulls the phone out, and just before he lifts it to his ear, you catch something - someone’s voice on the other end. A name? His? Yes they’re calling him it must’ve been his. Something clipped, ending in -chh or -shhh.

Josh?

Oh. Huh.

…Kind of disappointing.

You thought his name would be more... posh. Like something that comes with personalized cufflinks and generational trauma

….but Josh? That’s a guy who texts “you up?” at 11:48 PM from his blackberry pearl.

You hoped for more… syllables.

Whatever. What really surprises you is that Burgundy Swim Cap Man-slash-Josh-slash-Posh doesn’t say a word during the call. Not one.

He just holds the phone to his ear and stares - intensely - at a spot inside the glass food display. Not blinking. Not moving.

You’re genuinely concerned for the sandwich he’s glaring at. (It’s about five seconds away from bursting into flames.)

And you - you ache for that stare.

You want it on you. Burn it into your skin. You’d commit actual, punishable crimes for that kind of violent visual attention.

“Garcia, send me the files. We’ll brief the team as soon as I arrive,” he says - voice all business, clipped, calm, so authoritative it almost makes you bite your lip on reflex.

Then the phone disappears back into his pocket like it’s never existed, and without missing a beat: “An Americano, please.”

…Why doesn’t this surprise you? Could he be any more predictably boring? Go on, order a plain bagel and a side of unseasoned guilt while you’re at it.

But his eyes flick to the pastry shelf instead.

Brows furrow, slightly, sexily, offensively; he’s clearly doing some kind of emotional calculus about whether his swim earned him the moral right to a treat.

(He probably didn’t get many growing up.)

“And, uh… can I get the rainbow muffin to go?” he says, pointing with his chubby index finger toward the kids' menu.

You follow it (like an idiot).

And there it is. The muffin. Rainbow-sprinkled. Rainbow dough. Probably tastes like chemical vanilla. Pastel wrapper. Comes with a bubble blower, too.

A muffin. With a toy.

…This man.

You hate him. You want him. You’d marry him on sight.

He picks up the phone again. Dials. Calm. Efficient.

“Hey, can you pass me to Jack?” he says.

The frown - just a flicker ago, all sharp lines and no-nonsense jaw - melts. His face softens like he’s been flipped to a different setting and you actually flinch a little because how is that the same face?

“Hey, buddy.”

Oh. God, his voice. It goes soft. Stupidly soft.

“I’ve gotta be at work a little earlier today,” he murmurs, gently gripping the phone. “But I got you something… did you finish your homework?”

May you be absolutely, irreparably damned.

He’s a dad.

“Good job, buddy. I’m coming home soon, okay? Got you a surprise,” He glances down at the rainbow muffin. A little fond. A little sad, even. “Yes, you can do movie night with Aunt Jessica if I don’t manage to be there tonight…”

You wander how many other movie nights he missed.

“Yes, buddy,” he chuckles (you want to bite through drywall), “No, I didn’t forget the popcorn this time. You can have them with Aunt Jessica, she knows where they are… Yes, with salted caramel too. But don’t eat too much, alright?”

He pauses. Adds, with a soft little dad scold, “Make Aunt Jessica have some too this time. Save a few for Daddy, okay?”

Daddy.

Your knees give out.

No, not literally. You keep standing. But spiritually? Morally? Muscularly? You’ve dropped to the floor.

And then, casually, cruelly, he reaches for his coffee. With his ringless - yes, ringless - hand.

Not that you’re thinking about it. Not that you noticed. Not that you checked. Twice.

“Alright, buddy, I gotta go,” he says. His voice lowers again, not serious, just softer. Like he doesn’t want to hang up but he’s used to having to. “I’ll see you tonight. Be good, okay?” And then he smiles. To his phone. Like his whole face is a love letter.

Dimples. Of course. Of course this man has dimples. A loser dad with dimples.

“Love you too, bud”

And that’s it.

Phone call over.

You should walk away. You want to walk away.

But now you’re locked in that awkward limbo of mutual acknowledgment - the cursed micro-social contract that binds all humans in public spaces: you made eye contact, you must now exchange a minimum of one sentence to confirm shared reality.

He turns to you.

You are sweating. You are visibly short-circuiting.

No one is saying anything.

Fuck.

You shouldn’t have listened to his very personal call to his very personal son.

You shouldn’t have looked.

You shouldn’t have stared so hard you could recite the ingredients list on that muffin.

Fuck.

His shoulders look even broader in the suit.

Not just handsome - no, broad. Imposing.

Too bad the slacks are hiding his massi-

“The bubble blower’s for my kid,” he says, suddenly.

A preemptive strike. A full-grown man in what has to be his mid-40s, clarifying that he is not, in fact, personally invested in aquatic toy acquisition.

Funny, though - he didn’t feel the need to defend the rainbow pastry.

Interesting.

Bad for him.

“The muffin’s for the dad instead?” You nod toward the sad pastel pile in his hand.

(You’re a bit of a mean flirt - not because you’re heartless, but because it’s the only way you know how to hold on to a little power when someone makes your brain turn to mush.)

If you can’t stop yourself from falling for them, at least you can make sure they’re a little off-balance, too.

“If the dad’s lucky, he’ll probably get just a bite,” he replies, deadpan - like, completely expressionless except for the slight raise of his eyebrows at the end. You don’t even know where the voice came from. His mouth barely moved.

…Ventriloquism, probably.

Then he glances down at the linoleum floor. Smiles, almost shy.

“My son has a sweet tooth.”

Fucking hell.

This man is gushing about his kid to a total stranger in a pool cafeteria. No hesitation. No shame.

You are two seconds away from him flipping open his photo gallery and showing you twenty-five nearly identical pictures of a child covered in chocolate frosting, all while holding the phone in those massive hands.

God, his hands.

You really need to stop noticing them.

“Get a muffin for yourself too,” you say, tossing it out like a joke. Half-meaning it. Mostly-meaning it.

He chuckles, raises a hand, shaking his head. “Oh no…”

“Scared of food coloring?”

“No, no,” he laughs again. “Just…” He shrugs. Doesn’t finish. Leaves it there, hanging.

Is it because he doesn’t think he deserves a little treat?

Or because he’s afraid of getting that crisp, probably dry-clean-only shirt stained with rainbow frosting?

“How much is one rainbow muffin?” you ask the cashier.

(You two are best friends in your head now.)

He barely looks up. Dead inside. “One seventy.”

(This friendship might be one-sided.)

You blink.

$1.70 for frozen dough and a toy that doubles as a choking hazard… meanwhile, your cappuccino cost more than a gallon of gas.

Fucked up economy for real.

Then you glance at the cashier’s hands… he’s already typing it in.

Okay. Take it back.

That’s the real sign of late-stage capitalism: rainbow muffin doesn’t even require your consent to be rung up… but hey, at least you can afford it.

You’ve never been happier to be $1.70 poorer in your entire adult life.

You pull out your card.

He notices.

He pulls his, too.

Two cards. One slit. (Now this reminds you of your browser history from last night-)

“No, please, I got it,” he says - again.

Oh no, a damsel mustn’t pay for herself. (You hate him. You want to climb him like a tree.)

Watch her do it anyway. With confidence and $1.78 in her account.

You both arrive at the card reader at the exact same time.

Hands bump. Wrists brush. The tension is… stupid.

It’s awkward. It’s ridiculous. It’s… romantic?

Maybe.

Or maybe you’re just touch-starved.

Still-

You win.

Swipe clean. Transaction approved.

Victory, feminism, and low blood sugar all in one swipe.

“Enjoy the bubbles,” you say, smiling as you hand him the pastry and the overpriced soapy water.

He takes it, eyes flicking between you and the muffin, and for a second he gives you that look.

That slightly tired, slightly amused look men give right before they tell you you’ve done something reckless. Or charming. Or both.

He looks like he’s about to scold you. Fatherly. Disgustingly (hot).

He doesn’t.

“Sure,” he says, deadpan. “I’ll cherish them.” (Who even uses ‘cherish’ in the 21st century?!) And then, at the very end of it, a smile. Small. Real.

He opens his mouth again, “I-”

A breath.

“I have to go.”

One last smile. Quick. Tight.

And he’s already turning. Already halfway to the exit.

You stare.

Helpless.

Unwell.

For a second, you hope this modern-day Cinderella in a suit might drop one of his wildly expensive Italian leather dress shoes so you’ll have something to hunt him down with across D.C.

Track him by scent and shoe size.

But no. The shoe stays on.

He probably triple-knots them like the terrifying overachiever he is.

He does stop, though - just for a second - to check the time on his very expensive Rolex.

Hot. Unforgivably hot.

This brief, chaotic muffin-flavored detour has probably set him back exactly one minute and twenty-one seconds, and you know he’s internally recalculating his entire schedule down to the microsecond.

And yes, the panic is subtle. But it’s there.

In the clench of his jaw. The twitch of his temple. That microscopic furrow in his brow that says: How dare I entertain myself with flirtatious nonsense when I have 7,000 emails to check by 5 P.M.

Incredible. You’ve rattled a man with a watch that costs more than your rent. You’ve won.

You are going to be insufferable about this when your friend finishes her class.

Forget “stepped on your toe” guy. That man is dead to the narrative.

This dad is going to be the main character of every single conversation you have for the next four months.

You will tell her everything. Every glance. Every gesture. The muffin. The bubble blower. The nonexistent ass. From the moment you first locked eyes with this burgundy-swim-cap man named-

“…Aaron,” the cashier mutters.

You blink. “What?”

“That’s his name,” he says flatly. “Aaron. He comes here a lot.”

The cashier really doesn’t get paid enough for this.

Aaron.

Wow.

Two syllables.

“FBI,” he even adds casually, like it’s no big deal, as he hands a slice of pizza tucked inside a cheeseburger to a damp-haired five-year-old.

So.

Aaron owns a pair of handcuffs.

Government-issued. Handcuffs.

That tracks.

taglist: @beata1108 ; @c-losur3 ; @fangirlunknown ; @hayleym1234 ; @justyourusualash ; @khxna ; @kyrathekiller ; @littlemisskavities ; @lostinwonderland314 ; @mxblobby ; @oxforce ; @percysley ; @person-005 ; @prettybaby-reid ; @reidfile ; @royalestrellas ; @ssa-callahan ; @softestqueeen ; @theseerbetweenus ; @todorokishoe24

#aaron hotchner #hotch #criminal minds #aaron hotchner x reader #hotch x reader #aaron hotch x reader #fleabag!reader

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wigglesdtuff · 1 day ago

Note

I think I saw you say that Robin’s post-TS hairstyle was part of her character development reflected in her design (if that wasn’t you, my bad!) and I’d love to hear your expanded thoughts on it, and how that ties in with her Elbaf haircut now! After my friend said that her post-ts was just Croc’s ‘do but longer I haven’t been able to unsee it lol

That almost definitely was me because I feel very strongly about Robin's design journey and how Oda landed on the design he did and the way misinterpretations of her character because people want her to be nothing more than a hottie baddie femme fatale and *takes a deep breath* I know it's not that serious, but it means a lot to me!

Disclaimer: This is my personal interpretation, and I'm very passionate about it so take it all with a grain of salt!

So! Without further ado!

We can infer a lot about her haircut when she's introduced. Her face is covered/often in shadow from the hat which is intended to lend to the mystery of just who this woman is. We then see her first bounty poster. She's been wanted since she was 8. That's really fucking strange! Not only that but her haircut is nearly identical.

When she joins, she explains that she's more or less been on her own since she was 8, so you can infer that she's been cutting her hair like this herself. She's holding onto that moment where she had one friend she could rely on. She's literally stuck in the past. It looks almost choppy too, which to me tells me it's a quick utilitarian thing. It does not go past her shoulders.

Until she's been with the crew!

You can tell as early as Skypiea and through Thriller Bark, but it's super noticable in Sabaody just how long it grows to me. It's gotten super long!! She's letting them in by this point, she's found her home!

So when she comes back after being separated...

That change has fully taken hold! She's no longer covering her face either with a hat or her hair! She's more relaxed, she's almost always smiling unless something requires her full attention and even then she's Most Likely to Giggle and Verbally Heart Emoji. Her face is more open, it's softer. She's. Happy. She's changed in every meaning of the word! And she did it for her friends and for herself.

It's the most apparent to me in Zou. Like look at that face. That's the embodiment of joy. She's comfortable, she's relaxed. She's not hiding anything!

Then we hit Wano!

Miss Demonio dons the same old bangs and embodies the moniker her pursuers gave her. It is. Quite literally. The best of her and the worst of her. It is what she will do for the people she loves and who she has accepted love her. That is. Incredibly complex and beautiful to me.

Then we get some huge news...

Saul is not dead. The person who saved her and gave her hope and gave her the chance to get to where she is now, safe and happy and chasing the dream she picked up from the people of Ohara, so close she can almost taste it. He didn't die. He didn't die saving her.

She has

Come full circle. She has accepted her past and she is healing! Her bangs are the same, but her hair is still different! It's still longer, but it has a connection to that little girl who was lost and lonely. She also let someone else cut it, and not just anyone, but BROOK. The man who has kept his afro safe for 52 years so HIS friend could recognize him. To me, her hair in Elbaf is incredible. I take issues with the notion that "she's back" as if she ever left. This is new, this is different, and this is beautiful.

Thank you for reading my mini essay about her hair, but I really do think that character design means something. I don't think she's supposed to be a cold, badass. That was always an act. She just wants to love and be loved and she always has, and I think that her journey is portrayed beautifully by her hairstyles throughout the years.

#wtt asks #one piece #nico robin #obviously it could also just boil down to nostalgia bait because oda isnt infallible #but i hold this interpretation dear to me because i do think he prefers writing intimate human moments #thanks for reading!#anyways i love her so much i hope you know that

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doberbutts · 15 hours ago

Text

Being transgender, being gay, I made my peace with a lot of things when I learned many hard truths about what life would be like for me the moment I chose to chase my own happiness and walk away from the sensibilities of my family and hometown.

I made my peace with never passing as male. With never getting top surgery. With never having a friend group that actually understands me. With never loving someone who actually wants who I really am. With never getting married, or having a family.

I thought I could be content with what little I could do, because it seemed like I wouldn't be able to do much of anything.

It will be two weeks from my top surgery tomorrow. And it has felt like I'm living in a dream the entire time. I suppose after years of dreaming about finally having a flat chest, having this now be my reality feels like one sharp jolt and I will return to the waking world where this was never going to be an option.

I look into the mirror and I just see- me. I undid my surgical garment to apply my scar strips and couldn't help but stare. That's me looking back.

My breasts were large enough to obscure the shape of my torso- so I really had no frame of reference for what I would look like without.

I hated the sensation of having my breasts and especially my nipples touched- and I know part of this is the nerves re-attaching- but it's so sensitive right now. Not painful, just sensitive in a new way that I never really felt before. And it does feel like I still have nipples, even though I don't. Where my nipples would be, there is sensation present that is similar to what I've always associated with my shirt rubbing against them.

I've chased and wanted this for so long that now that I have it, it feels unreal. It feels like tomorrow some politician is going to announce that I'll undergo a second procedure to put them back on.

But it also feels like freedom. The smile on my face when I look down and see my chest, the giddiness I feel when I remember that this is the first two weeks of the rest of my life.

I don't have full range of motion or strength back yet. I can feel my pecs twitching as I sit on my couch, and I feel a million sensations playing back and forth across my chest as the nerves do their thing.

I started my scar tape today just to see if I can prevent the hypertrophic scarring I'm prone to and have in other areas. But, even if I can't, I'm happy to simply be flat. I'll figure out the rest later.

Anyone who has been suffering quietly- I'm 32. I came out at 13. I didn't feel right being a girl before that.

It has been a long and arduous journey. But it is never too late to take your first steps.

You also can chase your own happiness. You deserve it.

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prlssprfctn · 3 days ago

Note

About your post in which Jason loses his brain mouth filter and rambles all his train of thoughts, imagine if one (or more) of his friends appeared/were mentioned in the middle of this.

People would get a whiplash between all the childhood trauma bomb drop, the depressing thoughts, the cheesy sweet things he thinks about his friends but rarely says (only between them), the adult teen-adult trauma bomb drop, and the random ass thoughts must be the origin of his humor sense.

He would go from casually recalling that time he went days without eating anything but a piece of bread until poison ivy accidentally tripped with him because she hadn't seen him and paid him in apples to not snitch in which way she went to "at least I wasn't hungry when I was dead" to calling one of his friends amazing bc of [hyper specific treat they have] to "ughh that was so embarrasing. Why couldn't that batarang cut down my vocal chords too?" to some ridiculous knee-jerk response when someone asks about that.

oh. THIS.

just generally, Jason is so attentive to people he loves, i think he would also spur some little details about his friends and family that they themselves never noticed.

and the pipeline between random traumatic experiences and this? absolutely devastating. because deep inside, he is still the same second Robin they knew so well.

just imagine Dick trying to soothe him by playing with his hair, when Jason randomly goes in a whole rant like:

"i always hated people touching my hair... reminds me of times when i was earning some cash on streets, if you know what i mean... also i am pretty sure joker rip out a clump of my hair, but that might be wrong... memories are shit like that... reminds me of Roy. Roy is so fricking good with breading hair, Lian adores it. i seriously need to take a few lessons from him before visiting her again..."

or someone trying to distract him by suggesting to help Alfred in a garden, and Jason goes like:

"fuck, not the garden, ew, ew, ew. if i feel the dirt on myself again, i am going to shoot myself in the temple — again. i still can feel worms down my throat, fuck. god. urgh, abort it, abort it, abort it! anyway, right, i need to make it up to Kori for missing branch with her. flowers would do... not red roses, though, she thinks they are too basic... fuck, i wasn't supposed to mention it in front of Dick, he likes buying them to her and she will feel bad if he will— OH MY GOD, dad can you slit my throat again?"

...and that's how the whole family finds out about the batarang incident.

#— lie answering #anon 2 who asked to write more about this concept hope you see this post too #jason todd #red hood #batman #dcu #dcu comics #dc universe #batfamily #batfam #dick grayson #roy harper #koriand'r #kori anders

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liemoonlee · 2 days ago

Text

thank you haiku-bot for letting me see ...this!

I was nodding along like "yeah the whole Mormon wedding thing is weird" but ....... it's not THAT weird! Not in my experience or in my experience of going to hundreds of wedding receptions over the years.

For cred, I got Mormon married 1 year ago. I thought VERY seriously about having a civil ceremony AND THEY WOULD HAVE LET ME and then I would've done the religious section (we call it the sealing btw) the next day, and it's not quite as bad as OP is making it sound which I recognize is not, like, a stamp of approval.

The biggest thing I need you all to know is that never, in my whole whole life, has the bishop followed the couple to the reception and reminded everyone that this is the stupid party and the real part already happened. The man who officiated my temple ceremony was not even invited to the reception. (okay, that's not true. he's a family friend that could have come if he wanted, but we did not expect it because we got married in my hometown but alllll the wedding stuff was where we live. but OFTEN that guy is a rando and not involved in any wedding stuff other than the sealing itself.)

(all the sealings I've been to have been officiated by a family friend and they STILL sometimes mispronounce names, that part is 100% a possibility lol)

Anyway I'm not here to defend or debate the theology generally. Just to say, in my experience, I wore my own wedding dress to my sealing, and I had hours of pictures around my day, and my wedding dinners and reception were entirely religion-free. And that is the experience of my sisters, all the friends whose receptions I've gone to, and, to my knowledge, most mainstream Mormon members.

I very much doubt anyone will care enough for me to go point-by-point about what's right and wrong about the above posts. It's very reasonable for women to have hated their Mormon weddings, especially if they were more than 5+ years ago (they changed some of the ways sealings work recently). I totally respect them leaving and having their weddings be part of the reason. I get it. I really, really, really do.

But it's just not always as horrible as it sounds for every Mormon girl who gets Mormon married.

(Fine, every single Latter-day Saint girl. We're not supposed to use Mormon anymore and to that I say, ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)

PS: I am 36 years old and just got married for the first time. They don't force you to get married before 25.

i am increasingly convinced that the wedding industry is having a statistically significant impact on young women leaving the mormon church. has anyone looked into this?

#my 5 followers seem like a safe place to reblog this rebuttal to #i still think about the civil wedding i didn't have sometimes #but my husband didn't care and it would've been for his family #and it was definitely easier not to #so many other party things to do that weekend (only one of which was exclusive to the temple)

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lyn31 · 2 days ago

Text

Your Touch

Summary

A lighthearted yet intimate experiment in withholding touch backfires when Zayne proves just how much he’s come to crave your affection—leading to a playful battle neither of you really mind losing.

Ao3 link

My Masterlist ✨

Notes

Pairing: Zayne x MC/Reader College AU, fluff, kiss, I got distracted again (suppose to go up the same time as on ao3) but hey here it is!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You and Zayne are not the type of couple that does PDA. Maybe some light touches here and there, sharing food—things you'd do with a friend. But in private? Neither of you hold back.

You’re always the one reaching for him first. Whether it’s poking his cheek to get his attention, linking your pinky with his when you’re sitting close, or running your fingers through his hair when he’s studying—it’s just natural. And even if Zayne doesn’t initiate as often, he never pulls away. If anything, he leans into it.

You’ve noticed the way his shoulders drop when you absently run your fingers down his back, how he subtly tilts his head into your hand when you play with his hair. The rare times you pull away too soon, he gives you that barely-there frown, the one only you would recognize as sulking.

Which is why, when you come across a trend online—

Stop touching them for a day and see how your partner reacts!

—you just have to try it.

You expect Zayne to notice quickly. Maybe even call you out immediately. But what you don’t expect is how quiet he gets.

You’re in his dorm, sprawled on his bed while he sits at his desk, flipping through his notes. It’s the usual scene—you talking, he half-listening, occasionally humming in response or throwing in a deadpan remark when you get too ridiculous.

“—and I’m just saying, if I were a medieval queen, I’d absolutely have a secret escape tunnel. None of that ‘trapped in a tower’ nonsense.”

Zayne barely glances up. “You’d get lost in the tunnels within five minutes.”

You gasp, placing a dramatic hand on your chest. “Excuse me?”

“Excused.”

Normally, this would be the part where you reach over and flick his forehead. Or poke his cheek. Or, if you’re feeling particularly clingy, lean onto his shoulder despite his halfhearted protests. But today, you simply huff and fold your arms, keeping your hands firmly to yourself.

Zayne’s pen stills on the page.

It’s subtle at first. His gaze flicks to you briefly before returning to his notes. A few minutes later, he shifts in his chair, glancing at your hand when you gesture—but you don’t reach for him. He rolls his pen between his fingers.

Another few moments pass. You keep talking, but you catch the way his shoulders rise, then drop, like he’s suppressing the urge to fidget. His fingers tap against the desk. Then stop. Tap again. Stop.

Then comes the first glance.

Then another.

By the fifth one, it’s not subtle anymore.

You bite your lip, fighting back a smile. Oh, this is getting good.

Feigning innocence, you turn to him. He’s still sitting at his desk, but at this point, he’s fully facing you, elbow resting on the armrest, fingers tapping idly against his knee.

“What?” You keep your tone neutral.

Zayne studies you for a moment, his usual unreadable expression giving way to something more thoughtful. Then, with a quiet sigh, he pushes himself up from his chair and moves to the bed beside you. He doesn’t touch you—not yet—but there’s a crease between his brows, his lips pressed together like he’s working through a puzzle.

“I’m trying to figure out if you’re mad at me or not,” he says. “But I can’t remember anything I did that might’ve upset you.”

Oh. Oh no. He looks genuinely concerned. For a second, guilt flickers in your chest.

You blink, forcing your expression to stay smooth. “Of course I’m not mad. Why would you think that?”

He tilts his head slightly, eyes narrowing. His gaze flickers to your hands—resting neatly at your sides instead of reaching for him like they normally would.

And then, wordlessly, he shifts.

The mattress dips as he leans in, his head lowering until it rests against your lap. The movement is so natural, so easy, like it’s something he doesn’t even think twice about.

Your fingers twitch against the sheets. Stay strong.

“Oh? What’s this?” you tease, biting back a grin. “Does my boyfriend need attention?”

He frowns at you. Then, as if deciding he’s not getting enough from just lying there, his arm loops around your waist, and he buries his face against your stomach instead. His hold on you is loose, but there’s something unmistakably stubborn about the way he presses closer.

You hear a muffled murmur against your sweater.

“Hm? What was that?”

He lifts his head just enough to look at you, brows drawing together slightly. His grip around your waist doesn’t loosen. “If you’re not mad… then what is it?”

Oh no. He’s pouting. Well, technically, no—but for Zayne, this is as close to pouting as it gets.

You inhale sharply. Don’t laugh. Don’t break.

This would be a great time to come clean. You should just tell him. But he’s still clinging to you, half-curled into your lap, waiting for an answer with a look that’s entirely too cute for his own good.

So instead, you tilt your head, feigning innocence. “What do you mean?”

His gaze sharpens, suspicion flickering across his face. His grip around you tightens slightly before, without hesitation, he reaches for your hand, takes it, and places it firmly on his head.

You gape at him. Excuse me?

His fingers linger against yours, his touch slow, deliberate. He even strokes your palm once—almost absentmindedly, almost like a silent plea—before murmuring, “You’ve been avoiding touching me.”

Okay. Definitely time to tell him now.

…But.

Wouldn’t it be a waste not to enjoy this just a little longer?

So instead of confessing, you slowly run your fingers through his hair, reveling in the way he immediately leans into your touch.

“Did I?”

His eyes snap open. His body tenses for a second before he abruptly pushes himself up, face now inches from yours. His cool breath fans against your skin, his nose brushing yours.

His gaze drops to your lips for just a second before flicking back up. His fingers flex slightly where they rest on your waist, like he’s suppressing the urge to fidget.

“You’re playing a game,” he says flatly.

Your grin slips out before you can stop it. Your hands find his shoulders, playing with the fabric of his shirt.

“If I say I did,” you hum, “what are you gonna do about it?”

Zayne doesn’t hesitate. “Then I suppose it’s game over.”

“What—” You notice the way his fingers flex against your waist, his eyes dip to your lips, lingering there just a heartbeat longer than before. Your breath catches. “Wait—are you—”

He moves before you can finish. His lips crash against yours, stealing the rest of your sentence, the air between you evaporating in an instant. His hand on your waist tightens, pulling you flush against him, while the other cups your cheek, tilting your head just right. The kiss is firm at first—decisive, like he’s making a point—but it softens as he deepens it, his lips moving against yours in a slow, measured rhythm that makes your breath hitch.

You don’t even realize you’re sinking back until your shoulders meet the mattress. He follows without hesitation, pressing into you, his weight grounding, his fingers threading through your hair as he tilts his head and kisses you deeper. The heat of it curls low in your stomach, leaving you dizzy, breathless—your hands gripping his arms, unsure if you’re holding on or pulling him closer.

By the time he pulls away, you’re both panting, your chest rising and falling in sync with his. His forehead rests against yours, his thumb grazing your jaw in slow, absentminded strokes.

“I thought you hated losing,” you manage, your voice slightly hoarse.

Zayne exhales. “It’s your game over, not mine,” his thumb tracing slow circles on your hip. His voice is even, but there’s something undeniably satisfied in the way he says it.

You frown. “That doesn’t make sense—”

He cuts you off with another kiss. It’s brief this time, but no less deliberate.

You try again. "But that’s not even how—"

Only to get cut off with another kiss. “Mm, your loss,” he murmurs against your lips, punctuating each word with another quick kiss.

You blink, still a little dazed. Okay, well. This is very cute.

You suppose one loss is fine.

Grinning, you loop your arms around his neck, giggling between his kisses. He hums in response, the sound vibrating against your lips as he presses a few more slow, deliberate pecks to your mouth, like he’s savoring his victory. You didn’t expect this reaction, but honestly? It was absolutely worth it.

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Notes

Fluff fest. this week so far ahahahaha but I mean how can I not?

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revelboo · 3 days ago

Note

Some smut poly characters of your choosing pls?

How about a what if scenario with a very dysfunctional, in denial polycue in the making - I love that the Studio Series are supposed to be scaled accurately so Bumblebee Movie Soundwave and the other Decepticons are just huge like in TFA and the Bots are so small and I love it

18+ Mass displaced mech 🌶️

What If Scenario- Prisoner/Captor

Wheeljack x Reader, Soundwave x Reader

• What is it about you that makes him look forward to those hesitant, uncertain smiles? To the amusement of aggravating your guardian just to watch the smaller Autobot glare and put himself between you and him? Is it that you’re brave enough to smile at him? To try to talk to him, even though he knows you’re only trying to ingratiate yourself in the hopes he’ll free both of you. Not possible. Carrying an energon ration and food for you, he moves into the cells and hesitates. Normally you both look up as soon as he enters, but the Autobot is kneeling in the far corner where he’s dragged the bedding Soundwave had found for you after watching the way you tremble and curl into Wheeljack for warmth nightly. And you’re not moving, making him realize you’ve been less active lately, sluggish. Is something wrong with you? Sick, maybe? Why does that bother him?

• Tensing as Soundwave’s shadow blocks out the light, Wheeljack glares over his shoulder, servos trembling slightly as he lifts you into his arms, curling forward over you. Had mass shifted to hold you before realizing that there wasn’t much point in mass shifting back every time the Decepticon came to check on his prisoners, that he was just going to deplete his reserves trying to. And he’s well aware that in a one on one fight, Soundwave has the advantage anyway. Turning his attention back to you as you curl into him, seeking warmth, seeking his spark. Even though he’s only partially bonded with you, you’re both suffering right now. Mass shifting is one thing, but willingly exposing his spark? But he’s going to have to, to replenish his bond. Can’t stand to see you so exhausted and weak. “The human?” Soundwave growls and Wheeljack tenses. So far, the Decepticon hasn’t bothered you, knows it’s only because keeping you alive is an effective way to keep him passive, because he won’t risk you.

• “We’re fine,” Wheeljack says, voice rough and angrier than you’ve heard it. And you can barely lift your head, so bone-deep tired. Being in his arms soothes some of the discomfort, but can’t kill that empty ache. Needing Wheeljack, the warmth of him spilling inside you, the feel of him against you, inside you, entangled in you and his servos tighten on you, cupping the back of your head and you press your face against the mesh his neck. You’d heard how awful, how violent the Decepticons were from Wheeljack and the other Autobots, but Soundwave doesn’t seem like that. Brings you food and water, had bright you blankets, a mattress, and pillows you really don’t want to think of the origin of. But he’s not harmed either of you except when he’s forced Wheeljack out of his altmode, making your mate release you. And even then you’d gotten the impression Soundwave had done it because he’d thought the scientist might have weapons hidden away.

• Can sense the Autobot’s frustrated desperation, your exhaustion whispering through his processor. Knows Wheeljack is lying and he slips a thought into the Autobot, keeping his touch light to not alert his prisoner to what he’s doing. Going still as his understanding shifts, because he’d assumed you were a pet, maybe a friend. Hadn’t guessed you were a mate, though. Doesn’t know what to make of that information, either. It’s taboo, scandalous as he digs a bit deeper. And catches a memory so visceral he shudders. A memory that’s not his, but might as well be. A soft, warm body under his, wet heat wrapped so tightly around his spike as he moves against you. Feeling little hands on him, a soft mouth brushing his jaw as his head dips, mouth finding yours. Shifting the paneling protecting his spark to claim you, feeling you arch as he snares in his spark and you utter a breathy cry, fisting his spike as you pour into him. And Soundwave lets go of the memory, stumbling back a step, spark thrumming. Sees Wheeljack tense, optics narrowing. Opening the cell, he sets the food and energon down, secures the cell and strides away. Unsettled by what he’d just experienced.

• Soundwave’s leaving and with him, Wheeljack’s tension eases some. “Let me take care of you,” he whispers, battle mask retracting to brush his mouth against your cheek and your eyes are so tired when you look up at him. Knows how risky this is, but you still reach for him, soft hands on him as his mouth covers yours. Letting him strip you, settling over you. Coaxing you, servos sliding over your hip and down to cup you. Needing to claim you fully, so stressed out about this whole situation, he needs to reassure himself that you’re okay. To hold you, love you.

• Slumping at his desk, his servos drum on the console before pulling up the live feed for the cell. Watching Wheeljack shift over you, touching you as his mouth moves against yours. Your skin had been so soft in the memory, warm. And your thighs spread when the little Autobot settles between them, freeing his spike and sliding deep as you whimper. You’d been so slick and silken, so tight. Moving in lazy thrusts as you cling to him, shifting the plating protecting his spark and you cry out, a thigh sliding against the outside of his when Wheeljack snares you, bonds with you. Reaching down, Soundwave frees his spike, servos wrapping around himself as he watches, stroking himself slowly to Wheeljack’s rhythm as the Autobot takes you, replaying that memory, the sensations so real. Almost like it was him inside you, touching you. Bonding you.

#transformers x reader #soundwave x reader #wheeljack x reader #Wheeljack #Soundwave

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cameronsbabydoll · 2 days ago

Note

i would love to know more about their kids finding out how really is their dad after maybe seeing some situation with reader

a/n: this is really sad guys :( i low key want to make like a little part two on maybe her kids getting to like know her better as person not just as their mom and their dads wife

your daughter, now getting older and more perceptive, starts to notice the differences between her life and the lives of her friends. she’s at that age where she’s starting to question the world around her—what’s normal, what isn’t. she sees her friends’ moms working, making their own money, having their own identities outside of the home. they joke about “mom’s night out” or how their mom’s career is a big part of who they are.

but when she looks at you, her mother, all she sees is a woman whose entire life revolves around her father. cooking. cleaning. taking care of the house. going to the spa on the rare occasion that he allows it. she knows it’s not the same, but she’s not sure what’s wrong with it. she’s just starting to feel it—the way you seem to fade into the background sometimes, your happiness coming second to rafe’s demands and expectations.

she knows you love him. she sees the way you try so hard to make everyone happy, but something is off. you’re not the woman you used to be. the woman who laughed and joked and did things just for herself.

one evening, after watching her friends’ moms laugh together at dinner, she quietly retreats to her room. later that night, she knocks on your door, a small frown on her face.

“mom, can i ask you something?” her voice is soft, like she’s trying to figure out if it’s okay to ask. when you invite her in, she sits on the edge of the bed, hesitant.

“is... is that what love is?” she asks, her eyes wide and searching. “like... the way dad is with you? is that how it’s supposed to be?”

your heart drops, and you pause. you know exactly what she’s asking. the quiet control, the way he takes over every aspect of your life, the way your needs have always come last—she’s starting to see it.

“oh sweetheart,” you start, your voice gentle, but it feels heavy. “sometimes... love can look different for everyone. but love should always make you feel safe, and happy... not like you’re always giving up who you are.”

she stares at you, digesting your words carefully. she’s still young, but she’s so intuitive, and she can sense when things aren’t right. she doesn't say anything more, but you can tell she’s still processing it.

the next day, things go quiet at home—rafe’s doing his usual thing, working hard and expecting everything to be perfect. he’s always in control, but today, something feels off. your daughter—she’s been distant, quieter, not her usual bouncy self. you can tell she’s still thinking about it.

later, she seeks him out. maybe it’s during one of those rare moments when he’s sitting at the table, looking over his phone or documents. she walks up to him, not shy, but cautious. he looks up at her, a little surprised by the seriousness in her demeanor.

“dad,” she starts, her voice soft but firm, “is that what a husband is supposed to be? like, the way you’re with mom? is that how it’s supposed to be when you’re married?”

her question hits him like a punch to the gut. for a moment, he’s taken aback, unsure how to respond. she’s not being disrespectful—she’s asking a question. a question he hasn’t really thought about. he tries to brush it off, giving her one of his usual answers, the ones that always work:

“your mother and i have an arrangement, honey. everything fine. this is just how things work.”

but the doubt in her eyes lingers.

“but mom doesn’t smile like she used to,” she says quietly, almost as if she’s testing him. “she’s always doing things for you, but when does she do things for herself?”

that question hangs in the air between them. and for the first time, rafe doesn’t know how to answer. he can feel the shift in the atmosphere. his daughter is growing up. she’s starting to see past the surface. and it’s not just about the way he controls everything anymore—it’s about her mother.

for the first time, he feels a crack in his carefully constructed world. his grip on everything, including her, is slipping, and the unsettling thought is almost enough to make him confront the truth.

but he doesn’t.

meanwhile, his eldest son has been observing all of this from the sidelines. he sees the way his sister looks at rafe with those wide, questioning eyes, and he can’t help but feel vindicated. he’s always been more judgmental, more aware of the tension at home, but this? this is the moment when it all falls into place.

his friends’ moms have jobs, careers, lives outside of the house. they don’t have to ask for their space—they just have it. their moms are people in their own right, not just extensions of their husbands. he’s starting to see his mom in a new light—not just as his mother, but as a person, a woman who has been diminished by the constant control and the expectation to please.

and the more he sees his dad try to sweep it under the rug with empty promises or distractions, the more he wants to step in. but what can he do? he’s just a kid, too.

#cameronsbabydoll ⋆. 𐙚 ˚#anons ♡⸝⸝#sugar coated chains ૮꒰◞ ˕ ◟ ྀི꒱ა #rafe cameron #rafe cameron headcanons #rafe cameron fluff #rafe cameron x yn #rafe cameron x reader #rafe cameron blurb #rafe cameron fanfic #rafe cameron prompt #rafe cameron x wife #rafe cameron fic #rafe cameron angst #rafe cameron fanfiction #rafe cameron x you #rafe cameron smut #rafe cameron series #rafe cameron x female reader

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ryker-writes · 2 days ago

Note

Hello 👋 Ryker!

Can you write more headcanon of Dating Idia and Malleus (Poly relationship) maybe how each of the family or friends react to their relationship.

Of course! It makes me very happy that people liked the poly headcanons so much and want to see more! And I’m happy to deliver!

Request rules and masterlist

First part

More general thoughts:

Idia and Malleus are quite the pair to be dating

Once the students around the school are able to confirm it’s true that you are, in fact, dating both of them, news spreads quickly

Malleus doesn’t care so much about the news, why shouldn’t people know you’re together?

Idia however, is very overwhelmed by it all

Regardless of how long you’ve been dating, he still sometimes has these moments of thinking “How did I get here? Did I upgrade my charisma stats without knowing? Was it the charisma stat that made them fall, or was it a different stat?”

And as someone who prefers to stay in the background and avoid the public eye, the fact that everyone at school knows you’re dating him and Malleus causes a lot of panic

We’re talking like barely leave his room even just into Ignihyde kinda panic

It takes a while for him to calm down, and he gets spooked when people bring it up thinking they’re comparing him to Malleus

He might subtly be inviting you to his room more often because he needs the support without saying he needs he support

Speaking of support, let’s talk about how they want support/show support

Now these two are more reserved people, and tend to keep a lot of their thoughts inside and tend to stray away from large crowds. That being said, they simply enjoy your presence being in the same area as them, double the effect if both you and the other are there

Malleus enjoys having you and Idia there, and Idia enjoys having you and Malleus there (regardless of how out of place Malleus looks in his room)

Idia prefers doing his own thing while you guys do your own thing in the same area, while Malleus prefers doing activities together

But oh boy, these two feel most supported if you listen to them

I hope you’re a good listener, because wow these two can go on for hours if you let them

Idia and Malleus both love when people they care about get interested in the things they love, and get even more excited when they ask questions

They aren’t too physically affectionate people though

Idia gets nervous and panics at small unexpected touches, and Malleus keeps touches light and respectful

Most of the times it’s hand holding, a hand on your lower back as you walk, and maybe a hug if they’re feeling it

They coordinate surprisingly well when it comes to special events like your birthday, holidays, or school festivals

Instead of spending time one on one with them, they both are there for you during events

Idia likes it because people tend to steer clear of Malleus and there's guards keeping things out of his way, so Idia doesn't have to worry as much about dealing with people (the only unfortunate part is dealing with Sebek)

You basically get the royal treatment just by being with them, and that's the way they believe it's supposed to be

They are very mindful of each other during these events too. Malleus is careful about going into largely populated areas, and Idia tries to make sure Malleus is included in activities (in Idia's awkward way)

The dynamic being in a relationship with both of them works pretty well!

And then there's the friends/family

Lilia:

Lilia is actually very happy about this

Briar Valley culture is a bit...reserved and old fashioned, but Lilia is a man who's open to seeing and experiencing new things, so he's happy to see Malleus is too!

Having one partner is great, but two? He's very happy for Malleus

He does worry about how things will work out in the future with Malleus being royalty and having two partners, but that's an issue for later

He's pretty happy it's you and Idia of all people too!

Lilia loves video games, so he helps Malleus learn about them so he can communicate and bond better with Idia, and he's happy because then Malleus can play with him too

He feels like a proud dad watching Malleus with you and Idia

Silver:

Silver hasn't interacted with Idia much, so he can't speak on Idia's character, but he knows you! And he thinks you're good for Malleus, so he has no objections

As long as Malleus is happy, he really doesn't mind however Malleus chooses to have a relationship

He's pretty accepting of almost anything, so he doesn't even question the three of you dating or anything

He does try to get to know Idia more because of this though! Since Silver is the most calm among Malleus' guards, it actually goes pretty well and him and Idia communicate well

Sebek:

What do you expect, really? Of course Sebek is freaking out

His Liege has TWO partners?! What?!

Don't get him wrong, he has nothing against people having multiple partners, to each their own

But this is Malleus! The future ruler of Briar Valley! Sebek is going crazy that Malleus even has one partner and is of course judging them heavily to see if they're good enough for Malleus, but now there's two to judge!

Yeah, Idia avoids Sebek as much as possible

Sebek really doesn't want to question Malleus and his decisions, but he doesn't see the appeal of Idia

Malleus is quick to shut down Sebek's judgement and criticisms once he's aware of them, and Sebek will feel terrible

Ortho:

He's ecstatic!

Ortho has been trying for so long to get Idia out more and among more people, and you and Malleus help him a lot with that and he can tell you both make Idia really happy!

He's very proud of Idia and has no issues with you or Malleus

Sometimes he worries about Idia comparing himself to Malleus, but he's seen you and Malleus reassure him before, and how deeply the two of you care for Idia

Ortho feels like he doesn't have to worry as much about Idia since he has the two of you with him

He knows in his heart that the three of you will last a very long time

#twst #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #malleus draconia #malleus draconia x reader #twst malleus #idia shroud #twst idia #idia shroud x reader #idia x reader #malleus x reader #twisted wonderland malleus

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vroomingrussell · 3 days ago

Text

Papaya Rules doesn’t apply to the heart 🧡

Oscar Piastri is in love with Y/N Brown. Y/N has been and probably will be in love with Lando Norris, and Lando, is in love with the attention and the thrill of chasing his first championship.

Note: this will be part smau & partly written; all pics are from Pinterest and in this Y/N is Zac Browns daughter. The fic takes places over the course of the 2024 season.

Part 2 of 5

Y/Ninsta recent activities:

Lando unblocked

Lando followed

OscarPiastri followed

Account is now public.

🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡

Over the course of the weekend; you found yourself in the company of Oscar Piastri more often than not, he wasn’t someone you expected to gel so quickly with, you knew he was on the quieter more reserved side, but he was surprisingly funny, smart and very charming, every moment with him left you smiling and giddy. You tried hard not to think about the butterflies that stirred in your stomach, the last thing you needed was to catch feelings for him, you had vowed not to date another driver, let alone one from the same time as Lando; it would make things too messy and complicated, more so than the last one time.

Yet you didn’t stop yourself from flirting, he was cute, that couldn’t be denied; and just your luck, that caught the attention of the last person you wanted to pay you any mind.

“You and Osc huh?” Lando said as he crept up behind you on Sunday before the start of race.

“What?” You asked, there was no way you were going to admit anything.

“All the flirting?”

“Oh that’s not- shut up” you swatted his arm when he wiggled his eyebrows at you; you laughed so loud you snorted; he smiled brightly back at you, and there is was, butterflies, unwanted and unnerving. “Don’t you have a race to prepare for?”

“We don’t start for another 3 hours” Lando said as he bumped his shoulder against yours as you both continued through the McLaren hospitality. “Besides, you seem to be avoiding me, thought we could have a little chat”

“I’m not avoiding you” you lied, you definitely were.

“I missed you I hope you know that”

“Lando, let’s not do this”

“No- Y/N let’s do this” Lando said and he stepped in front of you, stopping you both in your tracks “you disappeared on me, blocked my number, blocked me on social media and even threatened your dad to not say anything about you to me”

“He wasn’t supposed to tell you that” you huffed. You crossed your arms over your chest and tried to look anywhere but his eyes.

“You just left and didn’t say anything and I didn’t know why”

And then the butterflies churned into angry hornets.

“Oh you didn’t?” You scoffed, of course he’d say that “Lando, I dont know if you didn’t realize it, but let me spell it out for you, I was in love with you; i thought you might have felt the same way- everything we did- all the things we-“ frustratingly you shook your head, shaking away the tears that burned your eyes “then you turn around and do that with someone else? And you claim she was just a friend? So what was I? Just a friend too, right?”

“You never said anything” he frowned, mixed emotions coloring his face.

“I didn’t think I had to, but it doesn’t matter right now. I’m here for my dad, I don’t need this”

“Y/N don’t be like this, we used to be best friends, we can be friends again, just like we were”

“Friends? I’m not interested in fucking you, considering that’s what all your friendships seems to entail” you knew how harsh that was, but you needed to say it; clear the anger you had harbored.

“And you’re not trying to do the same thing with Oscar? Since fucking your friends is something we have in common?” He lashes back, angrily.

“No you asshole, but that’s a new concept to you isn’t it?”

“You know those girls meant nothing to me”

“And neither do I, so if you don’t mind I have to go” but before you could actually move from his space; the hurt and anger on Landos face drained.

“Y/N look I’m sorry, I don’t want us to fight; I wasn’t trying to make this worst, can we just forget all of this and try to be friends again, you still are one of the most important person in my life”

“I don’t know Lando” you signed, the truth was, no time apart could change that, he was one of your best fiends, he meant the world to you too “I need time Lando, I’m sure we can be friends again but I need time to get us back to where we were, not the sex thing” you smiled at the last part “strictly platonic”

“I can be patient to be your strictly platonic friend again” he promises and kisses your cheek before darting off.

You continued down the corridor; your mind reeling from the back and forth, it left you feeling a little whiplashed.

“Hey Y/N” You heard Oscar before you saw him; his voice alone caused your rapid heartbeat to still; the churning in your stomach settled “you look worried, everything okay?” His browns furrowed in worry.

“Yeah, better now” you said with a smile, because everything did feel better now.

🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡

Y/Ninsta posted

Y/Ninsta: There’s no place like Monaco; congratulations to the Leclercs for the 1-2

Comments on this post has been limited

🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡

Race weeks drifted from one to the other; before you knew it you were celebrating another podium for Oscar. Oscar who had effortlessly wedge his way into your life, he was apart of your daily life, even when he wasn’t physically near you, he was always on your mind. You hated how easy it was to let your guard down for him, how easy it was for you to fall for him; not that you would admit it, you promised yourself you weren’t going to put yourself in this position again.

“Hey” You smiled when Oscar sat down besides you, the towel he had wiping the champagne from his hair tossed down on the table in front of you.

“Congratulations, I’m happy for you” You said “how are we celebrating”

“How bout dinner”

“Mhm sure you can come out with me and Carmen and George, we are going to celebrate”

“Thanks but no i meant- just us; like a date?”

“Oh um” you frowned “Oscar, you know i really appreciate you and our friendship but I can’t”

“Because of Lando?”

“What?”

“I know you guys were sorta together in the past, I didn’t know either of you still carried those feelings”

“No Oscar; it’s not Lando, I promise” you grabbed his hand and held it in yours.

“You don’t have to explain, I get it. I’ll see you around” he gently pulls his hand away and gets up, grabbing his towel and leaving.

You let out a sigh and collapsed back into the chair you were sitting in; why was all your feelings so complicated.

Quickly you shot off a text to Carmen, needing her and George to distract you with copious amounts of alcohol.

🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡

Wine drunk from dinner you found yourself with your phone tucked between your shoulder and your ear. You frowned when he didn’t pick up and called again.

“Y/N?” He answered after the second ring.

“Lando” you pouted though he couldn’t see you, you could hear the beating tempo of music in the background, he must have gone out.

“Y/N? Where are you, is everything okay?”

“I’m good, so good I’m at Oscar’s hotel, I’m going to see him/ you and I, we are platonic friends” You hiccuped, drunker than you had realized “and I’m gonna say yes to Oscar, gone on a date”

“Y/N” he signs your name, you didn’t know how much you broke his heart in that moment.

“I can’t love you anymore Lando, I can’t” the words left your mouth before your brain could stop you; there was a long stretch of silence between you; nothing but the music from his end. You ended the call and muster up the courage to do what you had planned earlier.

One wobbly step after another (heels weren’t your friend on your soberest of day; let alone now) you made your way to Oscars hotel room. You rapidly knocked on the door before a disheveled Oscar opened the door.

“Y/N? What are you doing here, is everything okay?”

“We should go on that date”

“You’re drunk, you don’t know what you’re saying”

“I am” you admitted “but I’m so sure it; Oscar you make me feel things I tried to close myself off to, I had no interest in falling for you, but I am and I’m not going to let what happened year ago to affect what we can have now”

“Come inside Y/N”

“Is that a yes to the date?” You asked hopefully.

He shook his head and led you into his hotel room “let me get you some water and get you into bed, we can talk about this later yeah?”

“Yeah, sleep sounds good” you yawned and let Oscar help you out of your shoes.

🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡

When you drunkenly showed up at Oscar’s door asking for a date, you hadn’t expected to wake up in his bed the next morning, the bed he was notably absent from. Your stomach dripped, you hoped you didn’t royally screw things up. But the note on the nightstand kindly let you know that he was out for coffee and quote, your hungover cure.

You got out of his bed and practically sprinted to the door when a loud knocking came, assuming it was Oscar, who you assumed forgot his key, you swung the door open without a second thought.

“Osc- Y/N?” Lando’s shocked expression greeted you.

“Hey, Oscar stepped out” you said and averted your gaze when you felt his eyes over your body; which was, as you know realized, dressed only in one of Oscar’s tshirt.

“Um yeah, tell him to call me before his flight to London”

You nodded and shut the door.

Your heart raced as you remembered the phone call between you; guilt settled into the pits of your stomach but you quickly pushed any tagging thoughts away, you refused to let any thoughts or feelings for Lando ruin what you knew can be something good. Oscar was sweet and kind, he was funny and charming; you were falling for him, and you didn’t want to let something from the past dull what could be a bright future.

That morning you ate breakfast together and he made you ask again, which you did, cheeks burning hot the entire time. Then you laid in bed and kissed until you had to reluctantly part. You’d see each other again in London.

London, where each day you spent trading sneaky looks and flirty comments; and each night you’d sneak into each other’s hotel room. You couldn’t be happier, even your dad had noticed, but you brushed him off. The last thing you wanted to do was for him to find out when you were still figuring things out.

As for Lando, you barely saw each other and when you did, you both had mastered the art of pretending the other didn’t exist, if it did come down to it, and you did have to speak, it was nothing but court.

It wasn’t until after Silverstone that you and Oscar managed to have your first proper date; you both had agreed to having a pizza baking night at your place in Monaco, you were in a pleasant happy bubble that you didn’t want to be popped just yet; you knew your relationship would be scrutinized, and you wanted to keep it to yourselves just a little bit longer.

Y/Ninsta posted to your story.

🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡

Note: oh boy; this part is a little all over the place but it’s just going to get messier and oh so angstyyyyy

Please let me know what you guys think!

Tag list:

@youp4028 @tinystudentblaze-stuff

@kikiki81 @devotedlydelicatefire

@mary-op81

@inthefairygrove

@formulaal

@storminacloud @imagine-it-was-us @landofotographyy @cutelittlefakejourneys

@nichmeddar @whoremores

@charlesgirl16 @mayax2o07

@ajordan2020

@jessica3478

#lando norris x y/n #lando norris x reader #oscar piastri x y/n #oscar piastri x reader #formula 1 x reader #formula one x reader #f1 smau #f1 x reader

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