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pilferingapples · 2 years ago

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LM 1.1.10

mortal forms are horrible and limiting and I'm not gonna bother trying to catch up--I've said absurd amounts about all these chapters before anyway-- but I wanted to mark a couple things on this one (my favorite Myriel chapter!!) if only for myself!

So long as there shall exist, by virtue of law and custom, decrees of damnation pronounced by society, artificially creating hells amid the civilization of earth, and adding the element of human fate to divine destiny; so long as the three great problems of the century—the degradation of man through pauperism, the corruption of woman through hunger, the crippling of children through lack of light—are unsolved; so long as social asphyxia is possible in any part of the world;—in other words, and with a still wider significance, so long as ignorance and poverty exist on earth, books of the nature of Les Misérables cannot fail to be of use.

I voted the end of the tyrant, that is to say, the end of prostitution for woman, the end of slavery for man, the end of night for the child. In voting for the Republic, I voted for that. I voted for fraternity, concord, the dawn. I have aided in the overthrow of prejudices and errors. The crumbling away of prejudices and errors causes light. We have caused the fall of the old world, and the old world, that vase of miseries, has become, through its upsetting upon the human race, an urn of joy."

gee I wonder how Hugo feels about the republic. if only this book had any political opinions. /s

(if you're New Here and haven't seen the many terrible opinions about how Les Mis is Not About Politics well. I envy you.)

The other thing I kept thinking about while reading this chapter this time around is this passage from The Siecle (bolding mine):

...the Restoration was actually not a bad time to be a peasant farmer — compared to the recent past. From the 1780s to the 1820s, French life expectancy soared by about a decade — from about 28 years before the Revolution to about 39 years after it. The stunted peasants of the Restoration were still taller on average than their fathers had been. The improvement is a direct result of the Revolution, which removed the old “feudal dues” by which most peasants, even those who owned their own land, had to turn over significant shares of their harvest to their local lord. In much of France, feudal dues amounted to around 20 percent of the harvest. Now, peasants had a bigger surplus, some of which they ate and some they used to diversify from wheat into more profitable forms of agriculture, like grapes or cattle

I feel like even those of us who speak up against the Thermidorian or reactionary readings of the FRev don't spend enough time talking about how it improved people's lives, not on a theoretical or conceptual way, but in a practical, lives-and-comfort way. So LOOK AT THAT. An extra eleven years on an average lifespan that hadn't even been three decades long (and that almost certainly is translating into a massive reduction in child death, specifically , given how child mortality weighed on those averages). And an extra twenty percent of their own production to some of the poorest people in the country. When G talks about the Revolution creating happiness, he's not just talking about Cool Ideas in an abstract. And when the monarchists we'll run into through the book lament the loss of the Good Old Days , they are--consciously or unconsciously-- lamenting those shorter lives, those greater odds of starvation.

(and all of this isn't even touching on the legal advances for marginalized people made during the Republic and then rolled back by subsequent governments, but that's for another day...)

ok Past Here Be Spoilers, and also it's mostly just me flailing about foreshadowing/parallels

Man should be governed only by science."

"And conscience," added the Bishop.

"It is the same thing. Conscience is the quantity of innate science which we have within us.

this is a fascinating line to me always?? That when Hugo says science, he's talking about something that doesn't just need to be guided by morality, but something that is morality; Conscience is Science! It's not like the idea of science as amoral and potentially destructive is a brand new concept we only got in the 20C; Frankenstein came out in 1818! But Hugo's version of science seems to be an understanding of/connection to the Infinite. (also: aaaaah about how much this is foreshadowing later characters/events. AAAAAH!!!)

You may say troubled joy, and to-day, after that fatal return of the past, which is called 1814, joy which has disappeared!

OK I get that 1814 is, in practical terms, when the monarchy was restored (fatal return of the past) ; and in terms of Being A Bad Time For France, was the year that the rest of Europe more or less occupied them for a while. Still it's interesting that G seems to see only the monarchy as undoing the Republic, and not the Empire. And I wonder if that was really what Hugo thought, or if this is a bit of political maneuvering-- saving the Napoleon I callouts for later, when they're less likely to get read?

"You have demolished. It may be of use to demolish, but I distrust a demolition complicated with wrath."

"Right has its wrath, Bishop; and the wrath of right is an element of progress. "

AAAAH SO MUCH FORESHADOWING (but also man I feel like there's a point here about the usefulness of anger directed the right way that would do some characters here a world of good, if they could hear it.)

I have done my duty according to my powers, and all the good that I was able. After which, I was hunted down, pursued, persecuted, blackened, jeered at, scorned, cursed, proscribed. For many years past, I with my white hair have been conscious that many people think they have the right to despise me; to the poor ignorant masses I present the visage of one damned. And I accept this isolation of hatred, without hating any one myself.

waaaah

I have been first, the most wretched of men, and then the most unhappy, and I have traversed sixty years of life on my knees, I have suffered everything that man can suffer, I have grown old without having been young, I have lived without a family, without relatives, without friends, without life, without children, I have left my blood on every stone, on every bramble, on every mile-post, along every wall, I have been gentle, though others have been hard to me, and kind, although others have been malicious, I have become an honest man once more, in spite of everything, I have repented of the evil that I have done and have forgiven the evil that has been done to me

aaaaaaaaa

#LM 1.1.10 #les mis letters #the tag is for my own sorting sorry #I'm out of touch I'm out of time #the conventionist #Myriel #long post #emotional about the Revolution in this chili's tonight!!!

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therealvinelle · 3 years ago

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Ok I'm embarrassed to admit this, but I'm just now copying your Norwegian Bella AU into a text translator, and if you don't already have 50 people in your inbox demanding a translation then shame on ALL OF US because this is glorious! And while Google Translate does have a certain charm (it translated "piper hun ut" as "she beeps") I'm curious to see how you'd put it in English.

Troquantary is referring to this post. In which Bella doesn't speak English.

Fun fact, you're the only one who's gone into my inbox to request this. I was so sad, had the translation half-written and everything, but I was too proud to beg. So thank you, Troquantary, for popping this ask.

As for the dictionary fuckups, sounds about right. I made a few typos, too, that made Google Translate suffer even more. (Such as managing to mix up "henne" (her) and "hendene" (hands), resulting in Aro patting Bella instead of clapping his hands. Poor Google.)

Also, there are a few cultural references and language things that would be lost in the translation, in an attempt to keep them I included notes clarifying things.

Some things, like Aro and Carlisle's very old man way of speaking, are easier said than done to translate, you'll have to bear with me there.

Additional notes are that I added a few things to this version, many of them because translating is hard, but a few because while translating I thought "oh you know what would be much funnier-" and then wrote that.

Alright, without further ado:

When Renée left Charlie she did not go to Florida, she went to Oslo. And she went all in to make her daughter a true Norwegian, hiring Norwegian nannies and making sure never to speak English around the child. Since transatlantic flights are expensive, little Bella Swan rarely got to visit her father, and as such she never did learn what should have been her native language.

She quickly forgot what English she did have in favor of Norwegian, with the exception of words like “Yes”, “No”, and “I’m Bella”.

The few trips she took to visit her father were all the more awkward than in canon since she couldn’t play with the Black kids. Let not the blame fall upon Charlie: he took Norwegian classes and speaks conversational Norwegian. He can’t speak to Renée, because her Norwenglish is incomprehensible even to Norwegians, but he can communicate with Bella.

Not that he’s had a lot of chances to do so.

Bella makes it to seventeen years old, she’s in second grade at Handels* and is a major outsider among the preps there, and then Renée marries a handsome skier**. Together they shall travel the continent all winter to participate in as many skiing races as they can, and in the summer they’ll take gigs at Hurtigruta to see the coast.

*“Handels” is the nickname for an Oslo high school infamous for its pupils being rich and beautiful blonds who are going to be CEOs when they grow up.

**Skiing as a sport is huge in Norway

***Hurtigruta is a famous ferry that travels across the Norwegian West coast

Bella, who sucks at skiing and is too young to work at Hurtigruten, takes the hint.

With dread in her stomach and dictionary in hand she goes to her father in America.

Where she doesn’t speak the language.

Faen.

Charlie gives her a car, and I wish this meta was set in the present because I could have joked about electric cars and the automat only driver’s license*, but Twilight is set in 2005 so I can’t. The car part proceeds without drama.

*An increasing number of Norwegian youth take the driver’s license for automatic cars only, and we’re the country in the world with the highest percentage of electric car purchases.

School is worse than in canon, because she is now a thousand times more sensational than if she was merely the new student. She is from another country! All of Forks keels over with excitement.

To make matters even worse, our girl doesn’t understand a word of what people are saying.

She is too awkward to let them know she doesn’t know English. It’d become a thing, and they might think she’s dumb. To be fair, it’s not good that she’s been through primary, secondary, and now a year and a half of high school and still sucks at English.

So she nods, smiles, mumbles “Hi, I’m Bella” to the new faces, and blushes heavily when anybody says anything.

People assume she’s shy. That’s a bit boring, but oh well.

She has her biology class with the redhead hottie she noticed during lunch. She watched him and his family, they were fascinatingly pretty, but she doesn’t know anything more about them. Sure would have been great if she could have asked the tiny girl (was it Jess?) about them.

Biology proceeds as in canon - Edward badly wants to eat the delicious girl, but fortunately doesn’t.

She runs into him in the office when he tries to switch to another biology lesson, but she has no idea what he’s saying so she only has the suspicion that this somehow concerns her. Which is still uncomfortable, but Bella is probably the problem here. The hottie surely can’t be.

He’s missing from school for a week, Bella finds that weird.

He returns, and to her great horror he starts talking to her.

“Hello”, he says.

Bella dies inside. He’s too handsome!

"I'm Edward Cullen," he continues, and ok, she got that. The hottie is called Edward, that’s good to know. She’s not sure she caught that last name, though, Köln?

He says something else, it’s gibberish to Bella even though she’s concentrating, and at the end there he says “Bella Swan”.

She gulps.

"I'm Bella Swan," she confirms and nods. That should be correct. God, she hopes it’s correct.

He smiles a crooked, boyish smile. She’s awed. She didn’t think it was possible to be so beautiful.

He says something else.

Bella didn’t catch it.

She blushes even harder, she hasn’t been more embarrassed in her life. Here he is, the most handsome guy in all the world, and she has nothing to say to him. Literally, they don’t speak the same language.

She should tell him.

It’s one thing to chicken out of telling the town she doesn’t speak English, but there’s something different about Edward Cullen. He deserves the truth.

But...

He’s the most beautiful person she has seen in her life. He is American, too, so the odds of him knowing Norwegian are microscopical. If he finds out she doesn’t understand a word he says he’ll stop talking to her, and selfish as she is she doesn’t want that.

So with a slightly guilty conscience (but not enough to fess up) she contributes to the conversation with enough words and smiles to pull through. "Yes", "No", "Thank you", and "That's nice".

He is surprised by several of these answers, but instead of giving her odd looks and losing interest he grows more invested in the conversation.

Class ends.

The next day the near accident happens, and he saves her. She is stunned - dear god, did he just pick up a whole car? After teleporting across the parking lot..?

Soon she’s in the ER, and more than a little bit stressed about that fact since she knows the Americans have a terrible healthcare system.

She hopes Charlie has an insurance.

An insanely beautiful man walks into the ER, and Bella is shocked. He is just as handsome as Edward and Edward’s lunch friends!

He introduces himself as Carlisle Cullen, and Bella can only assume this is someone’s older brother. Possibly related to the blonde girl.

He smiles at her, says something, and she answers, "I'm Bella Swan."

He frowns.

That must have been the wrong answer, then.

His hands return to investigating her scalp, and to her great surprise he switches to perfect Norwegian, "kjenner De* noe ubehag når jeg holder her?" Do you feel any discomfort when I touch here?

*De is the Norwegian polite pronoun for “you”. Du = thou = the French tu, and De = you = the French vous. These polite pronouns went out of use in the 1980’s, save for when addressing royal persons, and would be considered antiquated in 2005.

He hurries to add, "Norsk lærte jeg i... fjor sommer. Det var et nettkurs." I learned Norwegian… last year. Online class.

"Hvilket da?" Which one? Bella asks, because Charlie needs to hear about this. The doctor has beautiful, if slightly outdated, pronunciation.

The doctor’s smile turns uncertain. She gets the feeling there’s something he doesn’t want to say. "Husker ikke," I don’t remember, sier han etter en litt vel lang pause.

That’s a shame. And weird.

"De hadde hellet med Dem i dag, som ikke ble truffet av den bilen." You were lucky today, not getting hit by that car. he then says, noticeably changing the subject.

"Det var ikke hell, det var Edward," It wasn’t luck, it was Edward, she replies sharply.

The doctor definitely looks uncomfortable.

She continues, "Han krysset skolegården på et blunk, og plukket opp hele bilen. Jeg så det," He crossed the schoolyard in a moment, and picked up the whole car. I saw it,

The doctor laughs. "Om han kunne det hadde nok gymkarakteren hans vært meget bedre. Nei, frøken Swan*, jeg beklager å si at det høres ut som at De er litt omtåket. Det er helt normalt ved hjernerystelse." If he could do that, his PE grade would be a lot better. No, Miss Swan, I’m sorry to say you seem confused. That’s normal with concussions.

*Addressing a young woman as “frøken” is even more outdated than using polite pronouns.

Why does Bella get the feeling he’s lying?

She’s discharged.

We’ll jump ahead to her trip to La Push - that trip uneventful, since Jacob knows she doesn’t speak English. They stick their hands in their pockets and stare at the sea.

The next day she’s shanghaied to Port Angeles, because apparently she said “Yes” at the wrong time when talking to Jessica (Turns out Jess’s name was Jessica!) and accidentally said yes to a day trip to Port Angeles.

Like in canon she wanders away from the others, and as in canon she is nearly gang raped. And again as in canon she is saved at the last moment by Edward.

He buys her dinner, and she can’t believe her own luck- and misfortune. A date with the most handsome guy on the planet (hence the luck) and she can’t say a word to him (hence the misfortune)!

He says things to her, lends her his jacket, and really this is it for Bella, she’s peaked, life can’t get better than this.

(That’s a lie, it would be better if she spoke English.)

He’s so amazing.

She’s gotten pretty good at navigating conversations with him, so she nods and aha’s her way through.

In his car on the way home the tone takes a more serious turn.

He asks her about something, and it’s a serious question, that much she’s gathered. She answers in the confirmative.

He is silent.

Did she say anything wrong?

(Edward, on his end, just asked if she knows what he is. She said yes, so calmly, not even a trace of fear in her.)

A few days later he takes her out on a walk in the woods.

He shows her a meadow in the woods, and when he steps into it he lights up in the sunlight.

Bella is in shock.

She knew there was something different about him, but- holy cow. This guy isn’t human.

Is she dating a god?

She stumbles into the clearing after him, and they spend a day together where he says things, and she can barely hear any of it (nevermind understand it) because she’s so distracted by how pretty he is.

The next day he takes her to a house in the middle of nowhere. She doesn’t want to guess that this can be where he lives. Surely gods don’t live in houses?

He shows her inside the house, and introduces her for Dr. Cullen and a lady with a name she doesn’t catch.

Bit weird that these two are acting like a couple of parents, they’re far too young and divine for that.

Edward shows her around in an old-fashioned office, and she doesn’t know what to make of i when she sees a painting of Carlisle. Edward launches into a long story when he sees her watching it, unfortunately she doesn’t catch any dates or artist names. At one point she heard the word “suicide”, though, and that’s not good.

She doesn’t get much out of the story.

The baseball game doesn’t happen because Bella didn’t pick up on what Edward wanted and didn’t realize she was being invited to a thing. They spend the afternoon watching a movie instead.

The relationship continues, impeded slightly by communication problems, but she’s mostly able to cover those up.

Until her birthday comes around.

She gets a papercut.

Jasper lunges at her. Edward throws her into a glass table, and then everyone is leaving.

Carlisle is kind enough to switch to Norwegian when he’s stitching up her arm, perhaps remembering the last time she was his patient. "Jasper har ikke vært på dietten vår så veldig lenge." Jasper hasn’t been on our diet for very long.

"Diett?"she asks. She’s never seen Edward eat anything. She wasn’t clear on what the Cullens ate, honestly she thought they were above such things. She was thinking maybe photosynthesis. The knowledge that they apparently eat food astounds her, but diets?

"Dyreblod istedenfor menneskeblod," Animal blood in stead of human blood, Carlisle clarifies.

Whachasay?

Carlisle gives a slight smile. “Jaspers liv som vampyr fikk en brutal start." Jasper’s life as a vampire got off to a brutal start.

...

Vampire?!

Bella’s missed something here.

Oh dear lord, oh fy faen, she has missed something.

“Åja”, uh huh, is all she can say, and suddenly she’s very aware of the fact that she’s sitting there with a bleeding arm.

And Carlisle.

Who is a vampire.

Over the course of the following conversation Bella makes a host of discoveries.

Edward has been a vampire this whole time, and he’s a telepathic vampire. Whether Bella should be a vampire too or not has been a matter of hot debate, but due to religious reasons Edward doesn’t want that.

Carlisle also brings up how Edward died of the Spanish flu.

"Jeg var under den oppfatning at Edward fortalte deg bakhistorien min?" I was under the impression Edward told you my back story? Carlisle asks at one point, and Bella just has to ask very nicely if he’d be so kind as to repeat it.

Turns out the guy is nearly four hundred years old.

Jaha.

Jahahaha jaa ha.

That’s… a lot.

She wanders out of the house in shock, and hardly notices Edward’s strange behavior over the next couple of days.

One day he picks her up at school, and takes her behind the house.

That works out.

He’s a vampire, but he never hurt her. He is endlessly beautiful, perhaps easier to love now that she knows he’s not a god. He’s her Edward, and that’s suddenly easier now that she knows.

They can still be together.

But now that she knows this about him, it’s about time he knows something about her as well.

It’s time to finally be honest with him.

So when he opens his mouth, she opens her mouth as well, but she doesn’t get any further than to “Edward-” before he launches into a monologue.

She’ll have to wait until he’s done before saying her piece. It’s a bit embarrassing, but it doesn’t seem like he intends to stop talking anyway.

And what he’s saying seems to be serious, so it’s probably best to let him finish.

Edward concludes his monologue by kissing her forehead. Then he disappears.

Where did he go?

A big unsure, Bella goes back to the house. She’ll just have to wait until he gets back.

She doesn’t know what to think when Charlie returns from work and tells her the Cullens have all left.

Oh, god.

Edward must have found out she doesn’t speak English.

She made a mockery of him.

He has every right to leave.

Knowing this doesn’t make it any easier to live with.

Bella sinks into a depression.

The hallucinations begin, as in canon, though Hallusinward speaks Norwegian. Thank god for small mercies.

The friendship with Jacob (dictionary in hand) blooms, as someone has to help her see those hallucinations.

The cliff diving happens, and Alice shows up. Bella’s not sure what this is about, but she has gotten good enough at English to know that something bad happened, and Alice wants them to do something.

She’s a bit surprised to find herself on a plane to Italy, though.

Alice tells her to “Run to Edward” and ok, she got that, actually.

So she saves Edward.

After that she’s taken into the sewer, which turns out to house dozens of vampires.

Bella, Edward, and Alice are received in some kind of hall, where an unusual vampire has quite a bit to say. She understands some of what he’s saying, at least the part about “la tua cantante”. She knows a bit about Italian, see, so she knows that he’s talking about a song now.

She wishes she knew the context.

At one point he takes her hand, and appears fascinated by it. She wonders if he’s a palmreader. Not very vampirey, but what does she know.

He asks her a question.

"Yes," she says.

Saying yes has gotten her this far, after all.

But when he lights up and claps his hands together, and Edward and Alice stare at her in shock and betrayal, she knows she must have said the wrong thing.

The two are dismissed from the room before Bella can do or say anything, she’s just listening to Edward make a racket outside in the hallway.

Not good.

The unusual vampire brings her further down in his sewer palace to a basement, and she is given comfortable clothes to wear.

This is getting terrifying.

The vampire leans towards her - and she chickens out.

"Jeg snakker ikke engelsk!" she squeaks. "Non habla ingles!" I don’t speak English.

Han stanser, og ser forvirret ut. "Que- Hva behager*?" I beg your pardon? spør han etter et øyeblikk.

*A very formal, and slightly outdated (you can use it, but people will think you’re putting on airs. And they will be right) way of saying “excuse me?”

Sobbing, Bella tells him the whole story, from how she didn’t want to be the weird kid in school to how she’s now somehow in Italy without knowing why nor what she just agreed to.

When she’s done the vampire starts laughing.

"Dette forklarer jo en hel del," This explains quite a bit, ler han. "Men, kjære Bella, jeg er redd det ikke endrer noe." But, my dear Bella, I’m afraid it changes nothing.

He tells her that she has agreed to serve him and his army of undead warriors into eternity.

Well fuck.

"Du skal få slippe det, når du ikke visste hva du samtykket til - men skjebnen din forblir den samme. Loven er loven." You’re released from that promise, as you didn’t know what you agreed to - but your fate remains the same. The law is the law.

After a moment of silence, during which she looks terrified, he hurries to add, "Vi har en lov. Du må bli en av oss." We have a law. You must become one of us.

A law that Bella Swan has to become a vampire?

People are finally speaking Norwegian, and Bella is still lost. And it’s too embarrassing to keep pestering this poor, polite man with questions.

So she nods.

He gives her a glittering smile, and bites her.

When she wakes, Aro offers her an English course. A language course that, naturally, leads to her staying in Volterra. Why not learn a few more languages while we’re at it, dearest Bella?

Some time later Edward breaks into Volterra to save his Rapunzel, only to barely recognize her now that she’s a vampire who says things. Lots of things, she talks all the time now. WHAT DID ARO DO TO HER.

Too mortified to admit that she never spoke English, Bella claims she’s been brainwashed.

Aro is having too much fun to correct her, and the whole sad affair sets off a regrettable flood of rumors.

#troquantary #norwegian things #bella swan #twilight #twilight meta #twilight renaissance #evighetens kyss #evighetens kyss meta #evighetens kyss renessanse

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theparanormalperiodical · 4 years ago

Text

What The Hell Is Satanism? The Backstory, The Beliefs, And The A-To-Z On Devil Worshippers

4 days ago, Nike decided to sue a small indie art collective based in New York.

This isn’t news. This isn’t the first time a profit-mongering fashion-giant has targeted businesses trying to make a name for themselves. And it won’t be the last.

But this time, there’s probably something else influencing the executives reclining on their plush leather seats: they said it was because MSCHF stamped on the Nike Swoosh. But we all know what the real problem was:

These kicks were soaked with Satanic imagery - oh, and a single drop of human blood.

"MSCHF and its unauthorised Satan Shoes are likely to cause confusion and dilution and create an erroneous association between MSCHF's products and Nike”

Translation: no, we don’t want to be associated with devil worshippers.

Satan and his followers have once again hit the press following Lil Nas X’s latest viral YouTube hit and release of his custom footwear. And he does the belief system - and the LGBTQA+ community - justice.

But Satanism goes much deeper than pole dancing your way to hell.

It goes deeper than the fears of your evangelical aunt, it goes deeper than the rumours of a sacrificial ritual that happened in the woods outside of town, and it goes deeper than QAnon conspiracy theories.

Today we explore what Satanism really is. And what it really isn’t.

*twerks towards hell*

What Is Satanism?

Satanism is a group of modern religions that are centred around Satan, an entity in Abrahamic religions (e.g. Christianity and Judaism) that rebelled against God, has power over Hell and demons, and seduces humans into sin. Satan features in a vast number of major religions: he started off in Zoroastrianism, then making his way to Judaism, Islam, and Christianity. But the modern followers of Satanism are inspired by the Christian fallen angel and ruler of hell.

A large proportion of Satanists follow atheistic Satanism - they don’t necessarily believe in an entity but follow a philosophy that focuses on individualism and satisfying the ego, or rebel specifically against the dominance of Christianity in Western society.

Although Satan is typically considered the embodiment of evil, most strands of Satanism are not. However, there are some groups that fit this mould like the Order of the Nine Angles: they’re neo-Nazis.

The actual worship of Satanism only began just over 50 years ago, in 1966. But the use of the term ‘Satanist’ stretches back centuries further. Calling someone a ‘Satanist’ (or something to that effect) was an insult reserved for those that disagreed with a Christian group’s beliefs.

A Not-very-brief-but-look-I-tried-ok History Of Satanism

Here’s the thing about Satanism: at one point in history, every religious group was deemed Satanist.

You see, that’s how it all started.

Even the term ‘Satan’ originally meant ‘adversary’. It didn’t necessarily refer to a horned, evil ex-angel once scorned by the Almighty. It meant ‘other’; it was just an insult. It wasn’t created by groups of men draped in blood red robes preparing to slaughter a virgin to their ungodly master - Satanism was actually created by Christians.

The word ‘Satanism’ was first recorded in French and English literature back in the 16th century. Against the backdrop of the Reformation (when the Western Christian Church split off into Protestantism, Catholicism, and other more niche shards) rival religious groups would label each other with such terms frequently in various tracts and texts.

It was not to say that Protestants, for example, were actively worshipping Satan but were instead deviating from what Catholics thought was true Christianity. By ‘incorrectly’ serving God, they were supporting Satan’s claim to ruin the world with sin and evil.

*Disney villain laugh*

In the 19th century it broadened to encompass anyone that lived an immoral lifestyle and was thus serving Satan’s will. But in this same century it evolved yet again.

Yep, it’s time to introduce the actual Satanists: texts began to emerge that mention people that revered and worshipped Satan. It took a long 300 years for Satanists to reclaim their title. But the story doesn’t end here: this is a really important theme that runs like blood through the history of Satanism. Or, rather, the history of religious prejudice and persecution.

Throughout, well, all of human history, we have been swept up unto the belief that there is a dark, evil force lurking within our communities. The most recent example claims Joe Biden and his Democrat friends are Satan-worshipping baby-eating America-hating pedophiles. The fears of a discrete force that can hide at will fits the descriptors of the Judeo-Christian devil. And so, it had been applied to persecuted groups for centuries.

The Witch Trials and the Spanish Inquisition are the most famous examples of this. Satanism evolved in the Medieval era to scapegoat certain groups or to reinforce social norms by emphasising the apparently very real fight between good and evil.

Narratives of the French Revolution at the time were contorted with rumours of revolutionaries being part of a secret Satanic conspiracy. This revolution struck a blow to the power of the Catholic church, and some fingers pointed towards the dark lord of hell himself. Some even believed these revolutionaries had amassed supernatural powers to curse people and shape-shift into various creature ‘n’ critters like cats or fleas!

In the 20th century, another historical shift took place. And this time it (supposedly) happened from within the secret societies themselves: non-fiction authors and tabloids began to recount the allegations of people who once claimed to have been part of Satanic groups before converting to Christianity.

Doreen Irvine claimed she was given the ability to levitate amongst other witchy-powers. But Irvine’s claims sent shockwaves across the pond in the US. Much more horrific allegations were about to take centre stage. In the 1980s this would reach its climax with the Satanic Panic:

Also known as the Satanism Scare, the book Michelle Remembers (1980) detailed the alleged repressed memories of a psychiatrist’s patient which claimed they had been abused as a child for Satanic rituals. In these rituals, babies would be sacrificed and Satan would appear.

Reports of sexual child abuse for these rituals - known as Satanic Ritual Abuse - proliferated until the 1983 case made against the McMartin family. The McMartins owned a preschool in California and were allegedly sexually abusing the children in their care for ritualistic purposes. A lengthy trial ensued and the McMartins were eventually cleared of all charges.

But it was too late.

An evangelical anti-Satanism movement emerged claiming no children would lie about such claims and therefore all accused must be guilty. A conspiracy theory similar to those before emerged claiming SRA was rampant across the US, but it lost momentum by the turn of the 90s. Various investigations by the FBI and British government looked into SRA but found no evidence of Satanism or rituals in any cases of child abuse. Some lone cases of pedophiles did involve rituals, but these were isolated events that never involved Satanist groups.

The 7 Types Of Satanism

Satanism is an umbrella term to describe a vast array of religious groups. There’s a swirling sea of beliefs from the philosophical Satanists that don’t actually believe in Satan to the minority groups that are willing to sacrifice humans in the name of worshipping their god.

However, this ocean does share a common focus on individualism, self-perception, and non-conformity - traditional traits associated with the devil.

There are 3 forms of Satanism: reactive (attempts to invert Christianity and celebrates rebellion), rationalist (atheist and materialistic beliefs), and esoteric (actually worships Satan and draws upon religions like Paganism and western Esotericism).

The Church of Satan kick-started modern Satanism. Erected in 1966, Anton LaVey promoted an atheistic philosophy that focused on indulgence and an ‘eye for an eye’ ethical code that celebrated mankind as animals in an amoral world. Hate and aggression were not wrong but were advantageous for one’s survival. Yes, the seven deadly sins were actually beneficial for the individual.

The First Satanic Church was founded on Halloween night in 1999 by the daughter of Anton LaVey after his church was taken over by a new administration that Karla deemed against her father’s work.

The Satanic Temple is an atheist-activist group that stages political ‘pranks’ that rebel against the political and social dominance of Christianity. They aim to showcase religious hypocrisy in stunts such as performing a ‘Pink Mass’ over the grave of a Westboro Baptist Church goer (known for their explicit and offensive signs). They use Satan as a metaphor to rebel against a society that restricts personal autonomy and curiosity.

Luciferianism is a belief system that pivots around the characteristics associated with Lucifer. Followers believe Lucifer is the illuminated aspect of Satan, thus considering themselves Satanists. But some believe he is a more positive force than Satan. They follow the ancient myths of Egypt, Rome, and western Occultism. They consider him the true god - a destroyer but also a ‘light-bringer’ to the world.

The Temple of Set does not necessarily revere Satan by instead a being they call Set. Satan was the corrupted name of set, an entity that is the one true god. It gave humanity intellectual abilities to separate it from animals and they believe in a Setian philosophy with self-deification as the aim of all humanity.

The Order of the Nine Angles was inspired by ancient Pagan groups resident in Shropshire in the late 60s. But the founder of the group, Anton Long, is considered the pseudonym of neo-Nazi David Myatt. They encourage human sacrifice as a part of rituals and several members have joined the police and the military to do this without getting caught. The ONA is linked to several rapes, murders, cases of child abuse, and right-wing terrorism. They are also connected to several neo-nazi terror organisations.

The Joy Of Satan - contrary to its name - ain’t joyful. It’s an Occultist group that combines Satanism, Paganism, and UFO conspiracy theories. Just like the ONA, they’re Nazis. They believe Satan is one of many demonic deities which are powerful humanoid extraterrestrial beings which are equated with ancient gods. They believe Satan created humanity and brought us knowledge.

Reactivism isn’t a form of Satanism that is followed by an organised group but rather practiced on a personal, isolated level. It is considered an anti-social means of rebelling in a society dominated by Christianity. Most reactive Satanists are adolescents, mentally-disturbed, and have taken part in criminal activity associated with Satanic rituals they discovered through personal learning.

For example, in the 1970s two groups of teenagers in LA and Big Sur killed 3 people and ate parts of their corpses as a part of rituals devoted to Satan. Plotted murder and cannibalism are common traits of reactive Satanist crimes.

The A-To-Z Of Devil Worship

Baphomet

A deity that the Knights Templar allegedly worshipped. It is associated with the Sabbatic Goat which represents the equilibrium of opposites (half-man and half-goat, male and female, good and evil).

Black Mass

It is traditionally known as a requiem mass (funeral mass) in the Roman Catholic church from which the celebrants wear black clothes. However, it has been appropriated by Satanic cults. It often involves a naked woman as an altar and is the site of various Satanic magical rituals.

Cutter vs Wilkinson

A Supreme Court case which claimed federal funds cannot deny prisoners accommodations that are needed to engage in religious practices. Five residents of an Ohio prison including a member of a white supremacist Christian church, a Wiccan, and a Satanist filed the suit, claiming the officials failed to accommodate their ‘nonmainstream’ religions.

Devil

The personification of evil which shows up in many different religions. It is Satan in Abrahamic texts.

Demon

A supernatural entity often associated with evil. The original Greek word - daimon - did not have negative connotations.

Demonology

The study of demons.

Demonolatry

The worship of demons.

Goats

Satanism is always associated with goats. But why? There are several reasons: Baphomet is half-man, half-goat; the ‘infernal goat’ is depicted in many witches’ sabbats; Pagan traditions involved horned gods Christian forces deemed devilish; and the tarot card depicting the devil is a goat. In 1966, the church of Satan adopted baphomet as the sigil.

Lucifer

The name of mythological and religious figures associated with Venus. It is associated in the Christian tradition with Satan as he supposedly fell from heaven. Often called ‘the morning star’ or described as ‘light bringing’.

Stanislaw Przybyszewski

The first guy to promote a Satanic philosophy.

What do you think?

Let me know in a comment below! And while you’re there, make sure you like and reblog this article.

Want to read an article on the paranormal every Saturday? And a real ghost story everyday/whenever I’m bothered? Hit follow!

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jibrillenyan · 4 years ago

Text

Eldarya Come-Back

[Disponibile in Italiano qui]

Eldarya EU servers are back up. For people out of the loop, a fire destroyed both the servers and the backups of Eldarya. It's not beemoov's fault.

BR and US servers, stored somewhere else, are perfectly ok.

The FR server accounts were lost, but the story retrieved.

All the others (IT HU PL DE ES RU) have both the accounts and the story wiped out. ANE has been re-translated/Recovered, but origins is currently only playable in english.

Only the first 2 episodes of ANE have been translated so far. Errata corrige: PL, RU, ES haven't released any ANE episodes yet. DE IT and HU have the first 2 available in english. DE and HU appear to be broken.

Level 7 and episode 6 of origins (completed) are needed to access the market.

BUG REPORT: Currently there is a bug where if you change the name of your companion for the first time after evolving it you lose 100gc. please take care.

BUG REPORT: If you already have a companion and you play episode 3 of Origins you won't be able to hatch the companion Kero gives you and you might get stuck right after "Objective: Go to Kero’s room to complete the Companion Questionnaire"

Accounts must be recreated. You have to create a new account and, if you ever bought maana or gold coins, follow the instructions below.

I REPEAT, ACCOUNTS ARE LOST ON THE EU SERVERS. YOU MUST MAKE A NEW ACCOUNT. (sorry, I get this one a lot)

FAQ of sort under the cut, original here. Italian translation will be here starting tomorrow. warning: it’s long XD

♦ WHAT DO I GET?

Everyone gets 1000 maanas, 100 gold coins and 350.000 ancient coins upon creating an account. You will also get 5 big exp potions, 10 small, 5 big energy potions, 10 small, 1 evolution potion and 3 incubators. You will also get the companion Sogiluv... it's not very good. You can retrieve some (most?) of the currency you bought by contacting the support (see below), you will be credited maana/ancient coins depending on your purchases; once you get the money back the 3 spin-offs will automatically unlock, along with the bank outfits.

The first companion to hatch will require no incubation time.

BR and US Server got 10.000 AC for their troubles too, but no maana or GC or items.

♦ I ENDED UP IN THE WRONG GUARD.

Please check this page. Re-doing the 3rd episode of Origins WON'T help.

♦ DECORATING GUARDIENNE'S ROOM, EP 5-6.

If you want to know how to get the guy you like AND have the room decorated by him, or other questions along these lines check this link

♦ WHAT'S THE BEST COMPANION TO USE?

Since you can now get any companion you like if you want to get the "best" one in terms of energy/luck ratio you should consider these:

PLESE NOTE: Hatching an adult companion (Chiromagnus, Blobbiathan) has the advantage of giving you an adult companion AND saving the evolution potion. This could be nice to have, for example, during a map event, you can use all the energy of your companion after midnight, then hatch another egg, use all the energy of the baby, evolve with the potion, use all the energy of the adult. If well played , with a baby companion, it means potentially 400-500 energy to use on the map

"Best" Companion, bought food (36 maana): Blobbiathan Energy 170 (already an adult when hatched) Luck 360 - 400

"Best" Companion, bought food (30 maana or less):

1. Chiromagnus Energy 160 (already an adult when hatched) Luck 340-390

2. Zarali Energy 90-160 Luck 350-380

3. Ocemas Energy 100-150 Luck 310-360

4. Ciralak Energy 110-160 Luck 300-350

4. Rawist Energy 110-160 Luck 300-350

"Best" Companion, farmed food (in exploration):

1. Alfeli: Energy 80-150 Fortuna 320 -370

2. Gallytrot: Energy 110-150 Fortuna 320-370

I consider the Alfeli "better" because its food, elven grapes, comes from a 20energy/30 min area, Mont sizhe, compared to the food for the gallytrot, gallyflore, from the Cave (35 energy/60 min).

♦ WHAT CAN I USE ANCIENT COINS FOR?

There is a special ancient coins shop (Until May 9th) with ALL the items ever released in the game. I do not advise using them for Origins illustrations but I suggest you grab some of the rarest items at least. It's among the boutiques.

BANK ITEMS WILL ONLY APPEAR AFTER RETRIEVING THE PURCHASED CURRENCY (? Im not sure about this, some are there from the beginning and I'm still waiting on the email I sent for the currency)

♦ HOW LONG DOES THE SHOP LAST?

May 9th

♦ HOW DO I GET MY BOUGHT MAANA/GOLD COINS BACK?

Go to "your account" by clicking on your name (top right). There is a button to retrieve the credit, for many payment options there is a simple form to fill.

However, if you paid by credit card or paypal you have to send an email to the support (you can get the adress by clicking on "other"). In the mail you should include:

Credit card:

- Old/New Username (if they aren't the same) - The email address associated to the accounts - The date and the amount in €/$ of a recent transaction (max 12 months old, the most recent, the better). - Last 4 digits of the credit card you used. - I'm not sure what happens if you you used more than a credit card, I'd suggest sending one transaction per credit card and telling them about this issue.

Paypal:

- Old/New Username (if they aren't the same) - The email address associated to the accounts - If it's not the same email address, the email address/username of the paypal account. - The date and the transaction ID* of a recent transaction (max 12 months old, the most recent, the better).

* Transaction ID's can be found in the confirmation email you get when you make a payment or on the paypal website, in the payment history section.

One ID should suffice, they can retrieve them all from there.

♦ WHAT DO YOU ADVISE WE BUY?

On a general note, do not buy things that can be found at all times, like explorations items, other than that, anything you like, but I'd at least consider to buy/play the following:

*** PLEASE NOTE: I've heard rumors that during each event, you will be able to find things in explorations from the previous events of that kind, so easter should have the other easter events' outfits on the map. I'd wait a bit to spend the coins to see if we get any confirmation, the store will be open until May 9th.

HOW CAN I KNOW WHERE (SOMETHING) IS FROM?

Wiki. Or This wonderful site. Or the wikinyan (c'est moi!), I don't mind answering specific messages, I'll update this post with any question I get. If you don't know the french name you can find it out in the French shop.

1. COMPANIONS:

Other than the event companions that you like you should probably consider...

GET:

Minaloo and Draflayel. These only comes from the purro'swap. Once the store closes, if you're unlucky, you'll never see them again.

Calunko and Bunraku. They're 2 of the japan expo rewards and with the merchandise boutique closed, they're incredibly hard to obtain, you need a physical code.

Chiromagnus, while you can get this from explorations, the scroll for it is extremely rare, and 2000 AC is stealing it.

ON THE FENCE:

The Seryphon , Poulpatata (both of them) and the chestok. These can be found on AH but require Gold coins to get in exploration. Personally I won't get them, but it's personal preference.

SKIP:

All the normal explorations companions, no matter how rare. They'll start popping up at the market soon enough

2. CLOTHES:

This is clearly completely at your own discretion, Events and ranking rewards should be considered. However there are some times never released before, like the fireflies so...

GET:

Fireflies. A beta-tester reward item, they were never made available to purchase before.

Steam girl set (Total: 1594 AC). It's the japan expo 2017 reward, 9 pieces

Maana demon and its other 3 colorations is a skin never seen in the game, previously reserved for admins. It could however be added to explorations, like other items of this kind.

Frency French was once an inside joke for ChiNoMiko, has not been made available to the public before, you can buy the skin, the hairstyle (it's a special jackson), Frency French Top, etc it's just a joke, but it's still something you won't see again, if you like it.

ON THE FENCE:

Depending how much you hate alchemy, you can consider some alchemy stuff.

Some rare Skins like Nan'vi, that could be hard to find in explorations

Rainbow and Pearly hair colours, if you like them, they can be rare/offered only in rare circumstances.

Crylasm set (526 AC), top, socks, hat. It was a special Christmas outfit released one piece at a time during Christmas events of 2016, 2017, 2018

Healer support Set (400 AC), made of 7 pieces, it was a special gift given at the beginning of the 2020 pandemic)

Rainbow Spirit (1594 AC), released for the 2020 Pride month (sorta)

Guard ranking rewards, the total il 11.980 AC (thanks Desdhi ♥)

SKIP:

Anything normally on the shop, or from (normal) map explorations.

3.ILLUSTRATIONS:

GET:

Possibly the event ones you like the best, there should be 42 event illustrations for a total of 105.000 ac

SKIP:

If you have the time to farm, the episodes' ones. They're way cheaper with replay, with a few exceptions (see below).

ON THE FENCE:

There are a few episodes where it's cheaper to buy the other illustrations than replay, I'll make a list below.

♦HOW MUCH IS...

EGGS

As "one time" I mean it's either now or never, so exclusive items or event items, unless they come back with their event.

No Explorations is events + rare +the stuff that you would pay gc to get the bait for

All the eggs: 222.400,

One-time + rare ones: Chiromagnus, Minaloo Draflayel: 164.500

one-time: 158.000

No explorations (+GC/rare ones): 180.700

BACKGROUNDS:

All: why do you hate yourself? don't. it should be around 5660

Events only: 2460

EPISODES:

Event Illustrations are 2500 each, Episodes' 2000

It's generally cheaper to play the episode to unlock illustrations. Coins won't disappear, so if you can slowly make your way up you will end up saving A LOT of Ancient Coins. During episodes, each dialogue is 2 AC

(cost is rounded up) (!) = Replaying is not worth it, money wise (*) = more expensive than 1 illustration, but still worth it in the grand scheme of things

(how much it costs playing Origins VS how much it costs at the shop)

Episode 1 - Free - 1 Illustration, play once (FREE vs 2000) Episode 2 - Free - 3 Illustrations, play twice (FREE vs 6000) Episode 3 - Free - 1 Illustrations, play once (FREE vs 2000) Episode 4 - Free - 2 Illustrations, play once (FREE vs 4000) Episode 5 - Around 1200 maana - 3 illustrations, play 3 times (3600 vs 6000) Episode 6 - Around 1500 maana - 2 illustrations, play once (1500 vs 4000) Episode 7 - 1200maana ca - 4 Illustrations, play 4 times (4800 vs 8000) Episode 8 - 1700maaana ca - 4 Illustrations, play 3 times (5100 vs 8000) Episode 9 - 2000 maana ca - 1 Illustration, play once (2000 vs 2000) Episode 10 - 1500 maana ca - 3 Illustrations, play 3 times (4500 vs 6000) Episode 11 - 1900 maana ca - 2 illustrations, play once (1900 vs 4000) Episode 12 - 1500 maana ca - 3 illustrations, play 3 times (4500 vs 6000) Episode 13 - 1500 maana ca - 3 illustrations, play 3 times (4500 vs 6000) Episode 14 - 1500 maana ca - 2 illustrations, play once (1500 vs 4000) (!) Episode 15 - 2500 maana ca - 3 illustrations, play 3 times (7500 vs 6000, it's better to buy the other 2!) (!) Episode 16 - 2150 maana ca - 1 illustration, play once (2150 vs 2000 it's still worth to play the episode) (*) Episode 17 - 2450 maana ca - 3 illustrations, play ONCE (2450 vs 6000) Episode 18 - 1900 maana ca - 6 illustrations, play 3 times (5700 vs 12000) Episode 19 - 1700 maana ca - 4 illustrations, play 4 times (6800 vs 8000) Episode 20 - 1800 maana ca - 5 illustrations, play 4 times (7200 vs 10000) Episode 21 - 1800 maana ca - 3 illustrations, play once (1800 vs 6000) Episode 22 - 1700 maana ca - 4 illustrations, play 3 times (6800 vs 8000) (!) Episode 23 - 2100 maana ca - 4 illustrations, play 4 times (8400 vs 8000, it's better to buy the other 3!) Episode 24 - 2000 maana ca - 2 Illustrations, play once (2000 vs 4000) (!) Episode 25 - 2500 maana ca - 3 illustrations, play once (2500 vs 6000) (!) Episode 26 - 2200 maana ca - 4 Illustrations, play three times (6600 vs 8000, it's better to play once for 2 illustrations then buy the other 2!) Episode 27 - 1800 maana ca - 4 Illustrations, play 3 times (5400 vs 8000) Episode 28 - 1700 maana ca - 5 illustrations, play 3 times (5100 vs 10000) (!) Episode 29 - 3250 maana ca - 4 illustrations, play 4 times (13000 vs 8000 it's a huge ac loss to replay) (!) Episode 30 - 2400 maana ca - 4 illustrations, play 4 times. (9600 vs 8000 it's better to play once and buy the other 3)

Grand total so far: 93 Illustrations, 71 playthroughs, 58 suggested. Extimated maana/Ancient coins: 129.000 replay eveything vs 186.000 buying everything. Optimal: 122.750

IF you play everything once then buy the rest you should spend around 146000

* Optimal means buying the illustrations where needed before May 9th, then play all the episodes at your leisure. The episodes where you'd have to buy illustrations are: 15, 23, 26, 29, 30.

Please remember that if you buy the illustrations then you decide to play the game you will ended up paying not only 186.000 ac for the illustrations, but also roughly 60.000 to play all the episodes. The only case where my racommendation is to buy the illustrations is if you really don't care about origins or you only want a few illustrations

#eldarya faq of sort #eldarya

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infinitelytheheartexpands · 4 years ago

Text

Responses from the Opera Screencaps Captioning Quiz

Hello, everyone, and thank you for taking my quiz! I had SO MUCH fun reading your captions-- there were several times I literally started crying from laughing so hard at the amazingness of your work! With that in mind, the captions (which I will continue to add onto as more people take it):

(also, thank you to @dichterfuerstin for translating the German captions I got)

originally taken from: the Wiener Staatsoper’s 2020 production of Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart’s Die Entführung aus dem Serail, featuring Regula Mühlemann (center) as Blonde, Michael Laurenz (right) as Pedrillo, and an unnamed extra (left) as the Grim Reaper

Responses:

(Backstage warm-up) “ok so someone dropped the pulse”

me and my friends watching the fire burn after doing arson

Introducing the polycule to the parents

*boom* ... did...you guys hear that too?

Ma Signor !

Knight in whinging armour gone wrong, look at how he holds the egg. Polyamory with weird knight and death.

the father, son and the holy ghost are very gay

the gays meeting for brunch, 2021, colorized

chicken lady forces death and a very flamboyantly homosexual anthropomorphized pink bird to be parents of her egg (they dont want to be)

That’s just me and my friends on our night out (before covid rip)-- closest

A Good Friday night

good omens (2019)

["the pocket guide to boy/girl/mischief" meme] who's the boy and who's the mischief though????

Papageno and Papagena take their first-born egg trick-or-treating

Angry Birds - The Musical. A pig stole an egg and the bird unites with death to take revenge.

I love my bird wife

Someone got murdered during the funky chicken dance

throuple murders child and steals sibling of said child

When you and your friends have widely different tastes in literature

angel leading twink to his rightful place (hell)

draco malfoy from a very potter musical and a death eater are very much in the wrong show

What have I gotten myself into

Mlm/wlw solidarity but I’m not telling who is who

A woman stands with a pink dipshit with an egg and a reaper.

A bird-couple makes a pact with Death, sacrificing their first-born bird-child in order to bring good luck upon their unborn bird-baby

There are three types of people on Halloween:

Uh oh, I don’t think the mother hen is very happy about this...

oh god, they’ve invented seussical. It’s too early!

gay brunch

Three little maids from school are we

guys maybe if we dress gay enough we can distract everyone from the dead flapper bee in the back

those three killed a duck for her egg and are facing the conswquences.

Duck has egg with human, shocked and upset due to biological impossibility

When you bout to make a banging omelet so you invite your fellow queers

"No mortal man could pass that egg, but heaven shall repair your rectum."

originally taken from: the Salzburg Festival’s 2007 production of Hector Berlioz’s Benvenuto Cellini, featuring Maija Kovalevska (left) as Teresa Balducci, Laurent Naouri (center, in chimney) as Fieramosca, and Burkhard Fritz (right) as Benvenuto Cellini

Responses:

“In this same interlude it doth befall That I, one Snout by name, present a wall; And such a wall, as I would have you think, That had in it a crannied hole or chink, Through which the lovers, Pyramus and Thisby, Did whisper often very secretly. This loam, this rough-cast and this stone doth show That I am that same wall; the truth is so: And this the cranny is, right and sinister, Through which the fearful lovers are to whisper.” - a midsummer night’s dream, act v scene 1

"ah yes a prime specimen. see here, right in this box is our one of a kind hob goblin that can be all yours for the low low price of your soul"

what, YOU don't have a special eavesdropping chimney window?

Hänsel und Gretel plotting against the witch

man takes a wrong turn and ends up in a chimney, catches his girlfriend cheating-- closest

when you end up third wheeling the straight couple

lady cheats on her leather jacket wearing scummy boyfriend and when he unexpectedly comes home she hides the lover in the chimney

A straight girl and her gay best friend gossip about stuff idk

Idk Shakespeare?

experimental couples therapy feat. the chimney mf from mary poppins

Area Couple Inadvertently Traps Santa-in-Training in Chimney as they Attempt Rooftop Flirting

Landlords laugh over student renter's misfortune

I never asked for this

Ay yo lil mama lemme whisper in your ear

voyeurist listens to sandy and Danny from grease

Psssst! Did you hear about Susan? You won’t believe it!

lady and the tramp meets beauty and the beast?

human trafficking

And for just $30 you too could have your own tiny brick cage!

Psst I’m wearing assless chaps under this dress

A couple tortures a man in a box.

It's all fun and games being stuck in a chimney until your greasy uncle steals your crush from right above you-- okay ngl this could actually be a great Don Pasquale concept

Taking eavesdropping to the next level

Will you two stop being lovey dovey and let me out? SUMMER LOVIN, HAPPENED SO FAST—

overhearing how people talk about you when they think they're alone puts you in the shithouse

Does he know we can see him?

dear god, i am so fucking hungry, yall please just do whatever heterosexuals do so i can go eat a popsicle

the human version of the trash man from sesame street is realizing that those two are going to fuck on his trash can

Tmw you capture an angry short dude and start trashtalking him where he can hear

Omg what if we kissed but we actually kissed the lil goblin man under us

"Remember, don't feed him after midnight"

originally taken from: the Théâtre de Capitole du Toulouse’s 2017 staging of Giacomo Meyerbeer’s Le prophète, featuring Leonardo Estevez (right, on fake horse) as Le Comte d’Oberthal

Responses:

“When I said we needed to drain the swamp I didn’t think there were people actually living there”

horse? what horse? no sir i dont know what horse youre referring to.

definitely don't have a napoleon complex going on

King stole La Scala‘s Lohengrin set

king breaks all his horses, has to use statue dragged by servants as transportation because he’s too kingly too walk

Emperor Söder and his subjects on a carnival procession

man on horse makes a big deal out of being on a horse

That’s not Zeffirelli because the horse is not alive

Who the fuck put a horse on the stage

isn't this that picture of napoleon on the horse

Area Count Thinks Citizens will be Intimidated by his Extremely Fake-looking Horse Statue-- closest

Everyone wants their turn on the giant plaster horse. Police are there to make sure everyone waits their turn.

Night out with the lads

Local royalty horrified at the state of his own damn kingdom

gay army fights different gay aesthetics-- hi author how does it feel to be the funniest fucking person on this quiz

Well at least I LOOK badass

ceasar if he hadn't gotten stabbed (colourised)

some soldiers jumped out of my kindergarten fairytale collection book to burn the don carlos flemish deputies at the stake

It’s just a model

Is that how you feel pulling up in your Honda Civic, Madge?

Someone rides a horse statue in public.

Just a normal party with the bros.

what is this, some kind of crossover episode?

Terribly sorry for all the fuss, it’s just, that is, my horse is afraid of neck ruffles. I’ve tried to talk to him about it, but he’s—whoaaa there—he said he was a french courtier in a past life and he’s allergic to English fashion

Horse seller, listen to me! I am riding into battle. I need your strongest horse. - We have horses at home. - The horses at home:

All hail Incitatus the king

we are not ripping off shakespeare’s henry viii. what the fuck. this is about lenny xi you uncultured swine, go drown in a pit of your own farts

oh god is that hamilton

Guy Removed From Art Museum For Sitting On Statue, more at eleven

Gay <3

Officer: This horse... is a virgin! Crowd: *cheers*

originally taken from: the Parma Verdi Festival’s 2017 staging of Giuseppe Verdi’s Stiffelio, featuring Maria Katzarava (left) as Lina and Luciano Ganci (right) as Stiffelio

Responses:

That One kid in class

its a mEntAL BreAkDowN *final countdown but kazoo*

*record scratch* yeah, that's me. you're probably wondering how I got here-- closest

Dad keeps monologuing, teenager is done

left: all of my concerned friends, right: my emo ass having a very public mental breakdown

the demons in the corner of my room when im just trying to sleep

lady gets mansplained to (do i need to say more, we've all been there)

It’s probably an area baritone telling off an area soprano-- sorry; it’s a tenor. soprano is right though.

That was a fake horse in the last photo right?

child comes out as gay to father at a particularly bad time

dissociation solves everything

I can't believe it's not butter

Honey we talked about this

My sleep paralysis demon is Crowley from supernatural

child has nightmare of boring job

When you start dating a singer but he won’t stop practicing at night

just an average day in a hetero marriage

what do i do my wife's having period cramps again

Stop having an existential crisis. It’s time to sing!

“No son of mine will kin Gomez Addams under MY roof”

Crowley stares into space while a teen has post nut clarity.

When he wont stop reciting jordan peterson monologues!!

Do you realize how effed you are?

Ugh, not this lecture again! Dad’s Practicing For His Experimental Indie Band Again

asking your parents for help with your own personal situation and them just ranting off about what they went through instead of helping in any way

Will he shut up already!

no one tell him he’s yelling in the wrong direction, no one tell him plnsbdjddhdj

this kid is tired of his dad listening to rush limbaugh (a man who claimed to be pro life but died anyway)

Me internally vs externally

Daddy issues

originally taken from: the Grand Théâtre de Genève’s 2020 staging of Giacomo Meyerbeer’s Les Huguenots, featuring several chorus members

Responses:

It’s the deadly eye Of Poogley-pie. Look away, look away, As you walk by, ‘Cause whoever looks right at it Surely will die. It’s a good thing you didn’t … You did? … Good-bye. - shel Silverstein

why the fuckith? my good sir, i beg of you to put your pants back on

I hate this itchy hat

Titanic Extras hear that they have to do extra hours

people waiting to board the titanic watch someone fall off the plank

pov: you’re a time traveler

guy in the flatcap is embarrassed by patriotism and pathos

No idea. For some reason Le Marseillaise comes to mind

Is this from Harry Potter?

disneyland main street usa workers on strike

local tries to hide behind Newsies cap to avoid unpleasant but inevitable conversations. meanwhile, some very fashionable ladies look on.

"Thank fuck, 2020 was just a dream after all"

“We gather here today because this bitch got exactly what she deserved” “heaven!” “Stfu Stephanie she’s going to hell and we all know it”-- not quite but this basically happens later on in the opera (and act) so yeah (except the person in question very much Did Not Deserve It)

dc movie filter on bridgerton

america?

looks like my history teacher paused the prohibition documentary again

Who still wears page boy hats bro?

Coming out to a room of people who Already Knew That

Bitches are relieved at some party.

Several drunk people exiting getting off the subway attempting to seem sober and rational but realizing they have somehow lost all of their possessions

How tf do I act natural in this situation-- closest

“do you think any of them noticed that I don’t know the pledge of allegiance”

It's too fucking hot outside for this outfit

when hyyh yoonkook ending just hits different

pedestrians watch in horror as the triangle shirtwaist factory burns and the workers throw themselves out of the windows from a dozen stories up

Starting the pledge of allegiance be like

He's having a heart attack oh no oh god oh fuck

originally taken from: if I remember correctly, the Semperoper Dresden’s 2018 semi-staging of Johann Strauss II’s Die Fledermaus, with Jonas Kaufmann as Gabriel von Eisenstein

Responses:

“William Shakespeare wrote: "To thine own self be true And it must follow, as the night the day Thou canst not then be false to any man" I believe this wise statement best applies to a woman A blonde woman Over the past three years she taught me And showed us all That being true to yourself never goes out of style Ladies and gentlemen Our valedictorian: Elle Woods!” - legally blonde the musical

eat ass, suck a dick, and sell drugs

woooooorrrrd

Finally Jonas has graduated! It’s about time, considering he’s an international star.

what my professors think they look like

Prof. Dr. Dr. When someone tells him there are more than two genders

'and since you've now graduated high school, you'll be entering college etc. blablabla' .........meanwhile, there's a whole row of graduates daring each other to chug the cheap vodka one of them has brought in gallons (yes that happened at my graduation, lol)

Jonas darling baby <3-- can’t argue with that

I just realized I have no idea what the actual fuck happens in an opera

ok this one is just what jonas kaufmann always wears you can't fool me.

"as valedictorian i will share with you the importance of loving the floor"

"Yes, mother, my art degree will make me money!"

Graduation speakers are out, singers are in

Senior year takes a new meaninbg

mansplainer professor explains the concept of feminism to women

Your Prof when you finally turn in that missing assignment be like

younger boris johnson (derogatory)

jonas kaufmann retires from opera and takes up motivational speaking

What a fine graduation evening we’re having today

-70 points for slytherin you all have no swag

A man with a college hat sings.

An obviously greying actor trying to play a university student in a low-budget porn parody

How it feels to graduate high school after being held back for years

East High is a place where teachers encouraged us to break the status quo and define ourselves as we choose. Where a jock can cook up a mean crème brûlée, and a brainiac can break it down on the dance floor-

I may not have been "cool" in high school, but in ten years you will all be working for me!

I finally got my GED!

that one guy in ur intro to cultural anthropology class who mansplains to the professor somehow fucking graduated

he;s just graduating and taking his speech too serously idk

Graduation speeches with that one dude who got held back 3 times

Smrt

originally taken from: the Metropolitan Opera’s 2011 staging of Gioachino Rossini’s Le Comte Ory with Joyce DiDonato (left) as Isolier, Diana Damrau (center) as Countess Adèle, and Juan Diego Florez (right) as Le Comte Ory (disguised as a hermit)

Responses:

There is something very [disturbing grunts] About polyamorous couples - polyamorous, Chris Fleming

jinkies

femme fatale (including to herself)

I’ll have a threesome soon !

Hot guy walks by, everyone swoons.

thirdwheeling friend does not realize the other two are having sex

When your girlfriend had „just two beers“ again

jesus is exasperated about having to drag the two ladies towards doing what he needs them to do instead of purple dramatically declaring suicidal intent over the smallest trivial matters and red being equally dramatic about declaring that it's not the way! stay alive! i love you!!

The throuple is thriving

Get off the milf

orgy

my last three braincells because im a horny slut

countess receives too much love and is confused on how to react

Rasputin's lesser known romp with a much older czarina of russia

Woman's soul leaves body

Jesus and co. are worried after another woman gets pregnant without having sex

bisexual looks at photos of celebrity couples

When you go to the party to socialize with new people but your weirdo friend group starts getting clingy

Jesus cumming

one of those weird church christmas pageants but everybody's drunk

What have I done

Hozier??????????

Jesus assfucks some purple lady being hugged.

This time, the chick IS the magnet

An affair/threesome gone awry (2019 colorized)

What do you mean they canceled GLOW?

“I TOLD you it was cashmere!”

Are you wearing the - - The Gucci dress? Yes I am.

It's not what it looks like!

jesus is fucking that one cheerleader who grew up to be a suburban mom with one (1) super cool dress she stole from her kid who is desperately hugging her middle begging for it back because the spring fling is coming up and jason might actually make eye contact with her for more than three seconds.

jesus and mary magdaline and some other bitch

I’m at a bar and these drunk girls are flirting with me, do I lOOK GAY?!

Shrek 5, jesus's return

c. 2025 First attempt of an Officer and his Wife with a Handmaiden (colourized)

just about all of these are close lol

originally taken from: the Bolshoi Theater’s 1993 staging of Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky’s The Maid of Orléans, featuring Nina Rautio (left) as Joan of Arc and Vyacheslav Pochapsky (right) as Thibaut d’Arc

Responses:

Don’t look, I’m still pooping

yall, the audacity of this man. he fuckin talked to me

*i can't even tell you how wrong you are* *it would be insulting to ME*-- closest

Cospeto!

„No I’m not talking to you, you keep cracking bad jokes!“ - „But I got another!“

when you’re mad at him but he says he’ll buy you food if you cheer up

When I’m wallowing in self-pity but my friends won’t comfort me

right: wanna fuck ;) left: yeah, fuck OFF lmao

Her face is screaming “don’t tell me what to do”

Yeah I got nothing

gay man tries to hit on a lesbian bc he thinks she's a twink. she's not amused but she's watching this happen anyway

me tired of MET's bullshit and them organising a Netrebko, known blackface apologist, a recital during Black History Month. (sorry im still fucking salty lol)

"stop smiling at me like that I'm trying to pout over here"

"I got fleas, you got fleas... wanna fuck?"

I have the best idea!

Haha nooooo don’t hit me with that bat you’re so sexxyy

lesbian is bothered by dilf

Me trying to flirt

if call me by your name was hetero and set in america

how many more dad jokes can i take before i explode

So. You’ve gotten yourself in a little pickle again.

What if we fought in the Russian revolution together ✨???????... unless??

Two people flirt in a poor place of town/

"If you ask me what I've got under this dirty, shapeless tunic one more time I swear to god I will kick your rotting teeth in"

You look like ur gonna kill me but ok

Really? You again?

Okay, I’ve been sitting here for 20 minutes, do you think it’s safe to—oh god, he’s still there.

Have you seen Godot?

she is tired of everyone’s shit. she has done so many derivatives it physically pains her to see a variable. dont test her. ur icarus rn.

idk pick better pictures-- I HAVE DIED THE SHEER AUDACITY AND HUBRIS I LOVE THIS

200% done with your crap

Homeless man has fucking legs of steel n is gonna show off his Russian dance moves

originally taken from: the Théâtre de Capitole du Toulouse’s 2019 staging of Paul Dukas’ Ariane et Barbe-bleue, featuring Sophie Koch (right) as Ariane and I don’t remember who the person on the left is rip me

Responses:

The knight who wore this into battle sure was swaggy

dear god its hiddeous

Capitalism

Knight in shining armour gone even more wrong.

ghost contemplates the safety of spiky motorcycle helmet

„Stop! He feels bullied!“

'this is my newest take for jesus's crucifixion crown ...... what do you mean they already put him up'

That’s probably a really expensive magic helmet idk. IDK-- closest

Omg I love the adventure zone!

minesweeper (windows xp)

"Okay whatever you do don't touch the shiny spiky ball" "It's so shiny I wanna touch it"

Taking down the trash way too late

IT'S NOT A PHASE MOM

Darth Vader got stuck in the freezer.... again. Leia isn’t happy

Star Wars 2030

“And here is the very latest in motorcycle helmet trends” “Look, I only came to the mall for a pair of socks “

futuristic kkk

long-suffering jewelry store attendant really wants to retire

Put it down put it down put it down

“Hmm no you should see a doctor about that”

A weird ass crown is presented

The creation of sars-cov-2: an experimental Eurotrance nightclub art piece gone horribly wrong

How it feels to want something that u cant have

AND WE WILL CALL IT—SPIKE MAN actually do you think that’s too obvious?? Because of the—yeah, because of the spikes?? See, that’s what I’m worried about. I want it to be SCARY

I know it's risky but... lube me up

use the force luke.

that is a weird fleshlight

When you get an ugly gift and need to find a way to get rid of it, so your family member/friend offers to smash it

Touch the orb

originally taken from: the Opera Vlaanderen’s 2019 staging of Fromental Halévy’s La Juive, with Nicole Chevalier (left, with bottle) as Princess Eudoxie, Enea Scala (center, under table) as Prince Léopold, and Roy Cornelius Smith (right) as Éléazar

Responses:

When no one comes to your birthday party :(

fantastic, day 487 of mischief and they have yet to find my masterful hiding spot

i really wonder who he thinks he's playing footsie with

Marriage crisis. Reason sits under the table-- closest but not in the way you think (after all, the man under the table IS a tenor).

the last supper afterparty after jesus left

When you order the last supper on wish

espionage at the Politischer Rosenmontag

Probably the wrong opera but is that Leporello under the table

Now THIS is a Good Friday night

this was every birthday party i went to between the ages of 5 and 11

that awkward moment when you drop your fork under the table but when you re-emerge everyone else has left except one drunk lady and the guy trying to deal with her

After the last supper

Tfw you arrive to the dinner party too early and have to hide until a more fashionable hour

When the cishets aren’t home

waiter hides from customers

Nobody: My dog every time I’m eating:

what's left of the homies Jesus had dinner with

university chem lab experiment gone terribly wrong

I’ve been under the table FOR 30 MINUTES

Set your friends up by tossing them off under the table, they’ll think it’s each other n fall in luv

Someone hids under a table

"You're about to see an surreptitious-under-the-table-dick-sucking master at work"

5 yr old me trying to eat the desert under the table without my parents finding out be like:

They never invite me to their parties!

Just another girl’s night in

Oops! Didn’t notice you the table.

dionysus - bts (2019, colorized)

just a normal episode of eric andre (eric is the one under the table)

Just a normal day with the boys

Thievery

originally taken from: the Théâtre de Capitole du Toulouse’s 2017 staging of Giacomo Meyerbeer’s Le prophète, featuring Kate Aldrich (left, surrounded by women in white) as Fidès and John Osborn (center, looking like a Jesus doppelganger) as Jean de Leyde

Responses:

Hold up, is that Eggman above Jesus?

holy disco

Looks like Tannhäuser. Our lord and saviour Richard Wagner. Now I need to be saved from that.

catholicism

me defending pineapple on pizza (THANK YOU)

jesus but hes about to be abducted by the alien ufo above him

Emmmmmmm Heaven? Idk

Lord of the rings?

ewww christianity gross

"behold, I am Important"

"Seriously?? It's not ACTUALLY pyjama day? Fuck you guys!"

Jesus at the Disco

Jesus Finds The Molerat People Who Live Under Bethlehem

disco is heaven

Want to join my new religion?

the kkk

church christmas pageant where everyone's sober but it's based on the director's fever dream

Am I the only one who sees the giant demon? Just me? Okay...

“Oh god I think I’m starting my period”

A party is held with a priest in the middle

"Let's get this secret Vatican sex party rolling!"

The new avengers endgame set is looking great!!

You know, guys, I try not to be a bother but...I can’t help but feel like I missed a dress code memo for this wedding??? It’s cocktail, right??”

Jesus visits Hogwarts

I must really stink if no one will even come close to me

the extra ass funeral i DESERVE

star wars life day

A cult at it’s best-- closest

Shrek 5, Jesus is still there I guess

originally taken from: the Royal Opera House, Covent Garden’s 2013 staging of Giuseppe Verdi’s Les vêpres siciliennes, featuring Bryan Hymel (left, standing) as Henri, Lianna Haroutounian (center, kneeling in the black gown) as Duchess Hélène, and Erwin Schrott (kneeling to her right) as Jean Procida

Responses:

When the director’s like “great rehearsal guys, just a few notes before I let you go” but it’s already 9:13 and your mom’s waiting in the parking lot

loyalist of subjects

bow before your queen

They forgot to take down the stage boxes after the Vienna opera ball but the show must go on.

somebody forgot to book chairs for this funeral

Me sharing God’s (Hayley koyoko) word on the discord server

mass execution bc the oboe solo sucked ass-- closest

That’s too many black suits I can’t see shit

I can’t even tell what’s going on here

8th grade school assembly about how it's uncool to shit on the walls at school

let's all get fancy so we can go to the opera and sit on the stage (idk this one's hard lol)

"Yes i am a time traveller, now don't freak out"

Tfw you forget to pay your lighting bills

White guys make decisions that will benefit them and screw someone that’s not a white guy over-- OUCH but that is too real (although not really in context here)

dead man gives speech at his own funeral

brotus and the boys ??? last meeting before the stabbing

high society social function ends in mass murder-- right opera, wrong scene

Someone walks into the talent show stage with a dog

Black-dressed bitches worship a man.

Worst school assembly of all time

POV:You're the window in the classroom and someone said "its snowing"

When the conductor shows up fashionably late to the orchestra concert

That's what you get for choosing the cheapest ticket option, get back in the mud where you belong

theyre just trying to jump into a grave at a funeral leabe them alone this is normal

oh my god he really whipped his dick out in front of everyone, this is just like in 1776 guys, except some women are actually in the room this time,

A funeral, stop wearing so much black

I want to slap their bald heads like rice

originally taken from: the Teatro Real Madrid’s 2018 staging of Gaetano Donizetti’s Lucia di Lammermoor, featuring Roberto Tagliavini (right) as Raimondo

Responses:

Crowd “haha!! Looks like someone missed the all-black memo!! Now it’s laugh-in-your-face time! / Guy on the floor (whispering to guy against wall): go, save yourself! I’ll hold them off...”

if i leave now i wont be a witness and can tell the police i had no idea

it was the best of times, it was the worst of times

Guy in the back pretends to help but is to far away to even know what’s going on.

priest walks in on beginning of an orgy, contemplated joining but is too scared-

when someone brings up capitalism but you’re just trying to play minecraft

lol lets trample this guy while the judge isnt looking

Again. Too many black costumes

Loved this Dostoevsky novel

i would know if opera directors were more creative with clothing choices ngl

me on parties lol

"imma just sneak out of here while everyone else is distracted"

"Where did he get this flooring!? Amazing!"

Everyone act normal!

The tell tale heart but they got REALLY drunk

man tposes to ward off vampires after being caught undercover

boys ???? night

the priest really shouldn't have visited the insane asylum-- closest

He’s FINE everyone’s been hit by a car before

Something happens in a room.

Perks of being a wallflower

There's always that one person in the fight whos trying not to get involved when they really wanna

Oh good, they’re all posing for a Rembrandt painting, I can just sneeeeaaak out the back here...

The gamer livestreaming Resident Evil + everyone watching the stream ? waiting for him to open the door just knowing it will trigger a chase scene

Quick!

the guy t posing in the back is regretting his every decision.-- also accurate

the us senate jumps ted cruz, some other wack ass gop senator is trying to sneak away

...I spoke too soon, however this is a James Bond mission

Queers help fellow queer do math but it's a struggle

#opera #opera tag #results #screencaps #captions #caption #caption this #caption contest #this seems to have gone over well and I am Pleased

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after-anniversary · 4 years ago

Text

Here’s an L x OC story I commissioned from the wonderful @insomni-snacc! It is based on her story (and my emotional support fanfic) By Any Other Name, which you can and SHOULD read here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27596504/chapters/67510607.

---

Amelia was a woman of many names, a trait of hers that was only rivaled by L, himself. In addition to the many pseudonyms both detectives used, they had taken up a habit of imbuing each other with increasingly ridiculous new monikers, nicknames, and titles. It wasn’t uncommon for Amelia to refer to her companion as ‘Holmes,’ ‘Poirot,’ or the more childish and less creative ‘Frog-san.’ Likewise, L would often use any number of names for her, ranging from ‘Miss Adler’ to ‘Pecksniffan.’ (The latter being a reference to the double life she led)

There was one category they had never before encroached upon, however: neither had dared call the other anything resembling what might be considered a “pet name.”

But, they hadn’t been locked in a relentless game of flirting, before. In their need to be in constant competition with one another (and, quite possibly, as an excuse to act on some unspoken attraction to each other) they had decided upon a game in which the goal was to make the other party blush -- by any means necessary. For Amelia, this was easier said than done. Every time she tried to catch her opponent in anything resembling an amorous situation, she found herself feeling just as flustered as he was, if not more so.

For L, it was as simple as speaking French.

Amelia was utterly hopeless as far as the so-called ‘language of love’ was concerned -- which ironically mirrored her failings in romance, in general. Even the more widely known phrases alluded her completely, meaning she had to rely solely on inflection and context clues whenever L deemed it necessary to speak to her in the language.

At first, he only spoke French annoy her, but he observed a slight shift in her behavior when he slipped into the tongue. The nature of the language forced his natural baritone into even lower levels, something he noticed had a desirable effect on her: she would fiddle with the ends of her sleeves, avert her gaze, and abruptly change the subject. In other words, she was flustered -- or at least, that was his theory. And, as torturing the poor girl was the object of their game, it was only logical that he test his theory to its fullest extent.

“Ah, bonsoir, mon ami,” he greeted her one night.

(Translation: Good evening, my friend.)

They had not arranged to meet that evening after the task force had been dismissed. In fact, he had not asked her to stay behind for the past three nights, and yet she found herself standing in his door all the same. He surmised that asking the red-head why she was still spending her evenings with him, despite there being little work to do, would result in her becoming embarrassed and abruptly ending their late night visits. So, he didn’t bring it up.

“Are we really doing this again?” she groaned, already averting her gaze and toying with the edges of her sleeves.

“Je suis surpris que vous n'ayez pas pris le temps d'apprendre le français, tout bien considéré. Vous devez comprendre que je suis trop têtu pour arrêter simplement parce que vous me l'avez demandé.”

(Translation: I’m surprised you haven’t taken the time to learn French, all things considered. You of all people should know that I’m too stubborn to quit just because you asked me to.)

He stood and stretched. Sitting the way he did really took a toll on his back. The woman simply rolled her eyes, deducing that he was giving her some snide sort of explanation for his behavior, and took a seat on the couch a good distance away from where he stood.

“Whatever your reasons, I’m not going to be a very good conversationalist if I don’t understand what you’re saying. Is there any work tonight?”

“Non.”

This one was simple enough to understand without knowing the language. “Right, then. I don’t suppose you’d want to dance again?”

He shook his head, ambling over toward the sitting area. She sighed, sprawling herself out over the couch and grabbing a pastry from the ever-present spread of sweets on the coffee table. “Why, did I get a little too close for comfort, last time? Are you afraid I’ll win this round?” she said with a small laugh.

This was the opening he needed. He had noticed not only her reaction to his speaking French, but her ability to pick up on his general meaning based on his inflection. If she could interpret the meaning behind a simple ‘hm’ or a shake of the head, then French should be comparatively easy.

Let’s see if you’ll be able to detect my intentions, Amelia, he thought. And, if you’ll believe your own deductions once you do.

“La danse est assez agréable, mais je peux penser à de meilleures façons de passer notre temps.”

(Translation: Dancing is pleasant enough, but I can think of better ways to spend our time.)

It was practically a purr, and he laid it on thick. Amelia, having become used to picking up on much more subtle cues and inflections from the detective, was thrown off by such a drastic shift in his tone. She stared at him, jaw going a bit slack in surprise.

“W-what?” she said lamely.

He chuckled, taking his usual seat opposite her and grabbing a few pastries for himself. “Tu es mignon quand tu rougis, chouchou. C'est peut-être pourquoi je continue de jouer à ce petit jeu.”

(Translation: You’re cute when you blush, my sweet. Perhaps that’s why I keep playing this little game of ours.)

“Ugh, you’re impossible!”

“Et tu es adorable.”

(Translation: And you’re adorable.)

Even through a mouthful of sweets, the growl in his voice was enough to make the heat rise to Amelia’s cheeks. “I know what you’re trying to do, a-and it’s not going to work!”

“And what, exactly, do you think I’m trying to do?” Though he switched to English, his tone did not change. The corners of his mouth lifted in an unconscious smirk as he watched her fingers tighten around her pastry, nearly squishing it in her flustered state.

“You’re saying a bunch of embarrassing things to get a rise out of me!”

“Hm,” he mused, “you’re half right.” And he meant that, because while the game had been his main goal, he had enjoyed the opportunity to air his feelings candidly without the risk of being found out.

“Je pense que mon besoin de rivaliser avec vous s'est retourné contre vous. Je me suis mis à te harceler, et maintenant je t'aime un peu trop, mon amour.”

(Translation: I think my need to compete with you has backfired. I set out to pester you, and now I've grown a bit too fond of you, my love.)

“You’ve just called me a name, I can tell,” she accused.

“Indeed I have,” L agreed.

“And you’re not going to bother translating, I assume?”

“That would be correct.”

“You know I don’t understand French.”

“It’s a Latin-based language, the same as English. Surely you can work it out for yourself without me having to translate.”

L looked on as the gears began to turn in the young woman’s head with a satisfied smirk plastered to his lips.

Amour… so it’s similar to when he calls me ‘mon ami,’ right?

“I would expect a mind like yours to work this out much more quickly,” L teased, but she was too focused to respond.

Ok, Latin root time. What is the translation for the Latin root ‘am?’

“Or is it that you’re unwilling to tell me the answer?”

Oh.

Registering the sudden shift in her expression, L pressed her even further. “L'avez-vous compris, mon amour?”

(Translation: Have you figured it out, my love?)

But, the poor girl could barely speak. “I… I…”

“Oui, mon amour?”

(Translation: Yes, my love?)

“...You’re an asshole.”

“I believe the phrase you’re looking for is ‘trou de cul.’”

#death note #dn #l #fanfic #l lawliet x oc #l lawliet x reader

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wheremytwinwatches · 5 years ago

Text

[Where My Twin Watches]: PMMM Rebellion - Part 1

Showtime! Tephi has seen Rebellion now, so I’ve got the all clear to watch it myself. For planning purposes, I’m keeping a list of break points q_3 suggested (14:30, 30:30, 41:30, 54:30, 1:07:30, 1:23:50, 1:33:30) as planned stopping points between posts, barring ragequits. I’ll be watching the DVD, but feel free to follow along on Netflix! Because apparently the movie is on Netflix, as I only recently discovered when I went there to rewatch some Madoka episodes in preparation for this. All right! Time to dive back into the world of Madoka Magica. Puella Magi Madoka Magica: The Movie - Rebellion

Main menu is split between Ribbon!Homura looking off to the left, and the cover art of Magical Girls on the right. Light flute music playing. Black background, a small but bright pink light growing larger in the screen “We are the ones who pray for hope, embrace curses and fight ever onward. We are Magical Girls.” I think this is Homura narrating. Light shows itself as a Soul Gem, as Homura talks about how in obtaining miracles Magical Girls take a “destiny of battle” upon their souls. And that the destiny ends with the “salvation of oblivion”. Off to a cheery start, here! But! “By disappearing from this world, we could escape our fate of despair.” That’d be the change Madoka made, taking MGs away before they Witchified. Now the Gem’s falling through water, to a window? “Someday, that final day will come. As we wait for the Law of the Cycle to lead us away, we continue our unending battle.” Um, is it just me or am I hearing voices in the background? Can’t make out what they’re saying. “In this irredeemable world, forever repeating its tragedies and hatred, I dreamt that I encountered that familiar smile once again.” Camera is now looking over a sprawling city (Mitakihara, right?) at night, lots of shining steel and glass structures. But a series of colorful lines snake through the air putting out lights, then the artstyle starts getting trippy. Silhouettes of ballerinas?

Uh, now there’s a 2D teddy bear/doll thing dancing? Which just spat out a couple of smaller teddy bears and SWEET MADOKA they just blew through a building! The heck? This is clearly a Witch, what with the Labyrinth and wanton destruction and all, but how? Weren’t Witches replaced by Wraiths in the new world? As is, Teddy Doll is now resting to the graceful classical music and looking at the ballerinas Wait is that Madoka! It’s Madoka! Which… raises so, so many questions. But whatever, just look at her! So cute, shooting her bow into the air… and then frantically dodging the arrow storm. Hmmm, inexperienced Madoka? Teddy Doll runs from the barrage- and is followed by bubble-bouncing Sayaka? Ok, so this has to be an earlier timeline if they are here. Now Kyoko’s joined in the chase! Sayaka and Kyoko both attack Teddy Doll, lovely teamwork between these two, but it slips away from them into a building. Where it sits down at a dinner table? Wait, what’s going on now? There’s a French-style song with an accordion about “dreaming of the morning”, and Madoka just entered with a basket of bread. She’s feeding the Teddy Doll? And Sayaka and Kyoko just came in with more food?

Mami! Artillery Magical Girl is here, with some floating guns and And What the fuck is that thing doing here It’s Dessert Witch, the one that ate her head It’s right behind Mami What the hell Ok, what the hell just happened. Dessert Witch just sat down at the table, there was a huge burst of light as our girls just kept smiling. What is going on? Madoka wakes up? Ah, an odd dream. Wait, are you holding a giant orange Incubator plush? That’s INCUBATOR! GET OUT! That thing is lurking on Madoka’s shelf. Stop acting cute, you freak. I know what you’re capable of. Don’t say “Good morning” to it, Madoka! Cherry tomatoes getting cut? Ah, it’s like the first episode at Madoka’s house! Father gardening, Madoka getting her hungover Mother out of bed. There’s a change in the bathroom dialogue, instead of talking about Hitomi’s love letters it’s about how she’s dating Kyosuke. Well! Isn’t that convenient! Wait, no, this is the show that launched my Ship of Death. Nope nope not pursuing that.

Hey, looks like Madoka already has her Soul Gem in the form of her ring. Confirmation of earlier timeline. Also, Ms. Saotome’s talking about the end of the world in class? She's upset that her students are hooking up while she’s still single? New student transferring to class that day? Hmmm, a certain Mysterious Transfer Student, is it? “I wonder what they’ll be like? I hope we can become friends.” Oh, I have no doubt of that, Madoka. And then the Incubator ruins the mood by showing up. Bleh. Same sweet breakfast scene between the family, Madoka heads out while still chewing her slice of toast. The Incubator hitches a ride on her shoulder, and our Protagonist laughs. Ugh! Stop with the suspense, Urobuchi, looking at Happy Madoka just makes me more and more nervous. A light poppy song comes up, with credits? Intro sequence? Light gloved touches form a tree-shrouded pond, and MG!Madoka strides across the water. Now she’s seated at a carnival teacup ride, as Sayaka and Kyoko spin one of the cups. Daw, they’re on a daFRIENDLY CARNIVAL OUTING BETWEEN FELLOW STUDENTS. Ha, almost got me there, Urobuchi! Homura at the same park at night? Looks up at the sky which is raining white feathers. Madoka walks through a field of flowers next to the amusement park, then through the park hand-in-hand with Sayaka. Now it’s fall (Sayaka is in an adorable beanie and sweater) and they’re joined by Mami. Now it’s winter and Kyoko is chasing Sayaka for withheld food, she trips into Blue-Hair and they tumble to the ground entOH GEE HOPE THEY DIDN’T SCRAPE THEIR KNEES. Whew, too close. Spring again as the four walk up to a white-dress Homura? Homura’s surrounded by gears now, until a hipcheck from Madoka snaps her out of her doldrums and she’s dragged into the amusement park. More flashes of gears, then a carousel where Homura is kneeling and has muted colors, while the other four girls cheerfully dance. Showing how she’s separated from their time? Flashes back to the lake, Madoka extends a hand to help Homura up from her kneeling position. Homura reaches out- Madoka’s hand crumbles to sand? What? Homura’s now in what looks like a desert with stone pillars in the background. Cries? There’s a black earpiece-thing in the sand with a purple gem? And yeah, we end in the desert, the movie’s title coming up.

Well, ok then. I’m completely lost. What does all this mean? Back to the light peaceful music as we repeat the first episode, Madoka meets up with Sayaka- and Kyoko? So she’s going to school with them in this timeline? Quick zooms confirm that the girls have their rings as well, and Sayaka compliments her for her work last night. So they did fight the Teddy Doll? The girls walk into the school, and man the studio got even more animation money for this movie, didn’t they? Lost of students running around, the building looks even more ostentatious that before. Standard Magical Girl chatter about “Oh, I didn’t get the reading done/Meh, I didn’t bother doing the homework, can I copy yours?” Sayaka takes offense to Kyoko trying to copy off of Madoka, they squabble as Madoka tries to play peacekeeper. Even the Incubator pats her head in ‘sympathy’. In class, Teacher’s saying that just because the Mayans were wrong about Doomsday, doesn’t mean that they’re safe! Um. Ok then? Alright, maybe you should take your meds lady. It was bad enough when you wasted class time ranting about your exes, why don’t you do your job. “Well, to be honest… I think perhaps the ending of the world may not be such a bad thing.” Ok really now, you- “After all, I’ve had my fill of dealings with men and love and so forth. If I must carry on this way and have my age rounded up to 40 from now on, I’d rather everything just ended at once, in one fell swoop.” Ah, ok then. Teach’s just having a midlife crisis. Move along, nothing to see here.

Say hello to the Mysterious Transfer Stu- wait. Homura has her glasses and braids? Is this the first timeline, in fact? Even not being so Mysterious, the class all gives a gasp as she enters. And are those blushes I see on our characters' faces? Especially Maodka? Daw, that’s CUTE THAT SHE LIKES WHAT SHE SEES WAIT NO I MEAN IS HAPPY TO SEE A NEW FRIEND. HAH, DODGED THAT ONE. Huh, Homura’s cheerfully saying hi, no hesitation. So not the first one, then. Yup, brushing back her hair she flashes her Ring, our other MGs immediately recognize is for a Soul Gem. Right, this isn’t her first pass so she’s already got her powers. And maybe it’s still early enough she can be happy about the thought of saving Madoka? Now we’re on the roof, apparently Mami already knew about Homura, thought it’d be fun to surprise the other girls. Homura says she should have introduced herself last night, when they were fighting the- Nightmare? Translation change between the show and movie? Mami confirms that she was around last night, and that she has significant power as a Magical Girl. Homura protests that she is more of a support role that anything (still early enough she hasn’t been raiding armories for weapons). Sayaka welcomes the help, as does Kyoko “provided last night wasn’t a fluke”. Madoka grasps her hands, and welcomes her to the team.

All right! Now, what to say about the movie so far? AAAAAAHHHHHH THE DESSERT WITCH IS ALIVE IT IS FOLLOWING OUR GIRLS WHY WHY WHY WHAT IS GOING ON?!?!?! Ahem. So, obviously Dessert Witch being around is a Big Deal. Question is, what does it mean? All the signs are pointing toward this being an earlyish run for Homura, not the second because she didn’t immediately spring to blurt out Madoka’s secret, but early enough that Looping Fatigue hasn’t set in yet, nor has she developed her full combat style. However, now that I think about it I’m not sure all the mentions of Nightmares instead of Witches are translation changes anymore. What we saw of Dessert Witch in the show was an entity that wasn’t that cunning, mostly just focused on eating or destruction like the other Witches. But maybe there was a change this timeline. Maybe this time the Witch is taking a more subtle approach, is tricking or brainwashing our Magical Girls to clear out other Witches under the guise of “hunting Nightmares”. Which brings up some rather stark concerns about where this movie will go. Homura knows the truth, knows what Dessert Witch is and can recognize that something is wrong. So it’s only a matter of time before she rebels (title relevance!) and tries to take it out. But I don’t think the manipulated girls are just going to stand by for that. Hmmm.

#wmtw #where my twin watches #ranubis #pmmm #pmmm rebellion #puella magi madoka magica #pmmm rebellion 1

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tamakomarket · 6 years ago

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as requested on twitter

i use tumblr literally once a month at this point in my life and this time its for the vanven fic rec list someone requested over there

under a readmore so i don’t stretch any dashes

the word counts and au/canon tags all vary, but as a general rule of thumb these are all sfw! ill post ratings too tho

god, there are so many

tide me over, love and life - G, 9k, modern au. vanitas used to be an amazing part of the swim team but finds himself distracted and his times slowing lately. ven, the team manager, takes it upon himself to help vanitas out. very introspective heavy, featuring beautiful turns of phrase and a laid back pacing appropriate for your favorite slice of life anime. this is probably my favorite vanven fic, tbh

Heart Is Where The Home Is - G, 341k, canonverse. one sided roxas/vanitas. this is VERY LONG but its 1 the fic that got me into vanven and 2 in my mind, THE GOLD STANDARD FOR HEART HOTEL FIC. it bounces back and forth between two plotlines - a messy vanitas redemption as he and ven learn to live with each other, and how things get complicated once roxas and xion join the hotel. the characters are all amazingly written, the worldbuilding is very in-depth, and it also features one of the best written xion arcs i’ve ever seen in fic. DEF worth the read

You’re not the boy you used to be. - T, 176k, modern au, namixi sideship, mentioned terqua, sorikai, and leaisa. HUGE FOCUS on the friendship between vanitas and xion. hahaha you really thought i wouldn’t write a rec list and NOT include my own fics? blease. this is a story about grieving an abusive parent that got distracted by a romantic subplot. it’s a non-linear fic, following three different parts of vanitas’s life at the same time. there’s a xion quote that sums it up best imo: “We carry our childhoods with us. For better or worse, we still do. But we can be better from where we came from. We always can.”

Belief, Faith - G, 2k, post kh3-vanitas-somehow-redeemed-au. also my fic. vanven go on a trip and vanitas struggles with being accepted and loved. very introspective-heavy.

my heart’s on the (drum)line - G, 9k, marching band au, rokunamixi as a secondary ship. my last fic! this is 100% a romantic comedy in fic form, featuring the most obtuse vanitas ever seen. vanitas gets a huge crush on ven and is legit too stupid to figure it out, so he spends all his time being angry and melodramatic instead. props to his long-suffering best friend namine, who obsessively polishes her flute to blind the people who are mean to her and is a complete disaster about her own crushes.

Only You - G, 2k, canonverse. a heart hotel fic. waywardriot wrote an entire series of fics for vanven week and while i recommend all of them, this one is my favorite! basically vanitas finds redemption through the power of love. its cute as heck.

Salvation - G, 17k, canonverse, wip. a post-kh3 fic where vanitas is taken in by the guardians of light and very slowly redeemed. eventual vanven. no romance yet, but i LOVE how vanitas is written here (so much bitterness! he’s like a wounded feral anime) and i especially love his interactions with kairi and xion here.

Chains Unbroken - T, 72k, canonverse, side terqua and sorikai. post-kh3, post heart-hotel where vanitas gets to chill with the rest of the squad. he was stolen by xehanort and forced to become one of the 13 darknesses and it broke his heart, so ven and pals look for a way to help him out. the pov rotates between multiple characters, so you get a good look into many different relationships here!!! i especially love kairi here, too.

Codenames - G, 4k, modern au. vanitas is a secret agent and ven is the little voice in his ear keeping him on track. well-paced, funny, cute, and with enough intrigue to make the heist aspect super gripping!

we follow our own steps - T, 13k, canonverse. post-kh3 where vanitas doesn’t die, but finds himself with nothing other than his intense attachment to ven. this vanitas is SO fun and SO snappy, and learns how to be something other than completely unhinged. it’s also adorable and very sweet.

has no one ever? G, 390 words, canonverse. all lower-case, but it’s so short that it doesn’t bother me. this prose is ABSOLUTELY lovely and sad and it’s exactly what it says on the tin - ven helps vanitas clean up after a fight. vanitas does not understand what a gentle touch is. it’s good.

As He Sleeps - Not Rated (but sfw), 1.5k, canonverse. slight body horror warning. this features some BEAUTIFUL PROSE and it reads the way being in a dream that isn’t-quite-bad-but-isn’t-good feels. the kind of dream that you KNOW affected you deeply but slips through your memories the moment you wake up. fitting, since it’s a fic about ven’s dreams as he sleeps during the ten year gap. featuring some beautiful metaphors and comparisons to vanitas as a fallen angel. this makes me want a canonverse fic where vanitas is somehow alive and acts like a knight to ven’s sleeping body. please. someone grant me this wish.

Habit - G, 2k, canonverse. ven develops this weird habit of seeing vanitas at night. it develops into something more. very sweet, very cute, a good read overall.

heart to heart - G, 1k, canonverse. vanitas finds out ven is in love with him through their empathy connection. also adorable.

Come, My Purrloiner of Nightmares - G, 1k, modern au. LOOK. I JUST. IM A SUCKER FOR THE “CUDDLING DURING NIGHT TERRORS” TROPE

recovery is a long road (but there’s no traffic) - T, 10k, implied terqua and a bigger focus on the individual relationships between the wayfinders + vanitas than romance, canonverse. a REALLY GOOD post-kh3 fic exploring the wayfinders + vanitas healing after the big war. the prose is lovely and the exploration of every character is beautiful (AQUA IS MY FAVORITE IN THIS FIC, ACTUALLY)

ok these last two are in french but uh, look, LOOK. they’re readable with google translate. there are some weird translation things but these plots are good enough to push past that

Safety Lock - T, 10k, superhero au. LOOK. I LOVE SUPERHEROES. I *REALLY* LOVE SUPERHEROES. the worldbuilding here is SOOO MUCH FUN. ven is part of an agency of superheroes called the guardians of light, and when local supervillain vanitas starts stirring up more trouble, ven takes it upon himself to stop him personally. it’s what ya gotta do, when you have a shared past the way they do. it is SUCH a fun read and ven is SO MUCH FUN, it’s just a good time all around.

Eux, premiere partie (translation: Them, part one) - T, 38k, au. i have a huge weakness for a very specific type of story and that is “really rich kid is, for whatever reason, unable to leave their mansion and their life changes drastically when someone new enters their life” and this story is 100% that. the world outside vanitas’s family’s property is dangerous, filled with these people that aren’t really human anymore. ven is a bodyguard hired to protect vanitas, mostly from trying to escape the mansion again. thing is, the mansion is just as dangerous for vanitas as the world outside. i will be real with you the xion here is SUUUUUUPER OOC, and while she is a compelling villain in her own right, the role she plays and the personality she has here is something more akin to larxene. even then. EVEN THEN. the worldbuilding is SOOO GOOD, the relationship between ven and vanitas is very compelling, and the way vanitas is written (as this very bitter kid) is AMAZING. there’s so much mystery and intrigue about the world outside the walls vanitas inhabits, and there’s a ton of angst but it’s just. ugh. it’s so good. i love it especially for this line here, re: what desperation does to us: “Hunger, especially. It is she who destroys what remains human.”

there are other fics i have read and enjoyed but these all are like, top tier (or at least high tier) for me!!! looking at them all in a group its very obvious what kind of tropes i like

#i forget my text post tag lmao #fic rec

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kjs-s · 6 years ago

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The tower of Babel

Pairing Nyota Uhura x reader

Fandom Star Trek Aos

Summary A malfunction to the universal translator is keeping Uhura busy all the time.

Prompt “I haven’t slept in ages.”

Word Count: 1121

Warnings: This was inspired by a scene episode 4 of the second season of star trek discovery. It not that important to the plot but I still put a spoiler warning.

minor spoiler for Star Trek Discovery episode 2x4

A/N: This is my first entry for @resistance-is-futile81 Protagonists writing challenge. I am working on a second one for Star Trek Discovery that I will post next week.

@writing-journeyx @sprinkleofhappinessuniverse@ohyesmarvel@agentpeggicarter @buckyofthemyscira @romantichen @once-upon-an-imagine @locke-writes@lucetheding @marveliskindacool@captainrogerss @jurassicbarnes@uncomfortable-writers@theassetseyeliner@sgtbxckybxrnes @thetherianthropydaily@dresupi@caplansteverogers @captainrogerss @dirajunara-archive@imamotherfuckingstar-lord @outside-the-government@thefanficfaerie@admiralamott @yallneedtrek@goingknowherewastaken @girl-next-door-writes @janeykath318 @kaitymccoy123 @musikat18

You tried hard to concentrate on the papers in front of you. You needed silence to be able to do your job and having to work on the bridge was not ideal. However, you had no choice since the equipment in your lab was acting a little crazy lately. That’s why you were staring at the chart in front of you trying to block any other conversation happening around you.

‘’ Are you alright there Lieutenant (Y/LN)? I can still help you with anything you need.’’ Sulu knew how you preferred your workplace to be and you were thankful that you at least were able to work alongside him for the time being.

‘’I’m just a little stuck but I am sure the solution will appear itself like always. Thanks for all the help though boss.’’ You knew how he hated when you called him that, but being your direct superior and one of your best friends made it easier for you to joke around.

‘’Don’t mention it. And don’t worry about your astrometric lab. The ensigns from engineering are working hard to fix everything. You will go back to being the isolated cartographer who barely speaks to the rest of us in no time.’’

‘’I speak to you Hikaru, I just need serenity to help me focus. You know that too much chatter often irritates me even if I don’t address it.’’ He knew you well to understand that. He was happy to have you nearby again that he searched for noise canceling headphones for you.

After a while of trying to find a solution, you decided to take a break and maybe check on the repairs in your lab.

‘’I need some fresh air. I will go for a little walk and be right back.’’ You informed Sulu.

‘’Fine, oh and can you go by my botany to make sure none of my flowers need watering please?’’ He looked as stunned as you were realizing he said that in what sounded like Spanish or Portuguese.

‘’What did you say?’’ You responded in Greek. You looked around and noticed not only everyone being bewildered but also all the monitors being in a variety of languages.

‘’What is happening?’’ Jim asked a little loud to be heard by everyone. It would be a good question if he hadn’t asked it in Gaelic.

‘’I can’t read my console.’’ An ensign pointed out in Klingon. ‘’And what language am I speaking?’’

‘’I can’t understand anything in my controls captain.’’ Another ensign replied in Mandarin. ‘’It must be a problem to the universal translator.’’

Realizing the problem that had occurred you signaled the captain to let him know that you were going to track lieutenant Uhura to help with the situation.

You found her in her room and it was obvious that she was about to take a nap.

‘’Nyota you need to come with me now.’’

‘’Of course, darling but why are you speaking Tagalog?’’ She said while getting ready.

‘’Universal translator has been invaded by a virus and not it’s translating everything into a different language.’’

The two of you ran to the bridge, which was still in complete chaos.

‘’Welcome to the tower of Babel lieutenant. I am so glad you didn’t follow Spock and Scotty on their away mission.’’ Jim was so relieved to see her that his French sounded like a poem.

You smiled as you watched your girlfriend move around the bridge like a dancer and interacting with all the machines. Knowing as many languages as she did was one of the things you admired about her.

She wrote something down and instructed you to track down Jaylah and give her the note. It was telling her to disable the translator hoping the backup one would work and translate everything to Earth English again.

Several hours passed without any progress. Nobody could work on anything without Nyota being there to explain what the consoles where saying. Some people who had learned other languages were able to assist, yet she was the one who did the most.

Late at night, you checked on her worrying that she must have been exhausted. She assured you that she was feeling fine and you let her get back to her job. You knew that pushing her to stop wouldn’t lead to anything good.

Almost at noon the next day, she was still assisting everyone all around the ship. You asked her to stop helping one of the crew members on the bridge for a moment so you can talk.

‘’You need a break. I understand that you are essential to all of us right now but not if you collapse. Jim, back me up here will you, please?’’ You wrote down a note saying ‘’tell her to sleep’’ on it.

‘’I tried to get her to go to sleep then again she won’t hear me. I had a hope you will get some sense into her. I don’t want McCoy to have to chase her through the ship. He does that with me.’’ He said all those towards you in Italian knowing Nyota would know that he had said.

‘’I hear you, captain. However, even though I haven’t slept in ages...’’She rolled her eyes saying that, thinking about how you were overreacting about the fact she didn’t sleep all night. ‘’I need to help everyone.’’ She spoke in English surprising everyone.

‘’Is it fixed? Is it finally over? Can you understand me?’’ Jim looked around to see the relieved faces on everyone around him. Jaylah informed everyone over the comm that she had fixed the translator.

‘’Seems like that. And you know what that means. You will so to see Christine in the med bay so she can check on you and then it’s off to bed. I will come by at noon to see how you are.’’

When you went by her room before lunch, she was still sleeping so you ended up spending your afternoon together. It didn’t strike you as odd that Sulu let you have the afternoon off. Perhaps he was afraid you would worry about Nyota being ok and complain about not being with her. You had a great time and anyone who saw you was grateful for her help during the crisis. You were happy to see everyone treating her with the adoration and respect she deserves. Both her and Jaylah who was reserving the same amount of praise for fixing the issue. In addition, while Nyota was singing a song for you, there was an announcement from the captain informing you of an upcoming shore leave after the away team returns. He was planning to throw a party for the two heroes on the ship.

#startrekantagonistchallenge #nyota uhura x reader #star trek aos #star trek fic #my writing

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96thdayofrage · 4 years ago

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I’m not trying to hide my personal beliefs about these people in some pseudo high-minded analysis that purports to be about something else.

If, however, you’re looking for that sort of thing (that is, if you’re looking for an example of an actual hit piece!), you will surely find no greater example than the Harvard Kennedy School’s Disinformation creep: ADOS and the strategic weaponization of breaking news.

As far as hit pieces about the American Descendants of Slavery movement go, Disinformation creep is the one that really aspires to a kind of hang-that-sucker-up-on-the-refrigerator worthiness. It’s Harvard-certified, after all! And gosh, if there were ever an institutional badge with which all ten (ten!) authors of Disinformation creep could dazzle everyone in the rancid social-professional hierarchy they are all so obviously and desperately trying to climb, it’s certainly Harvard U.

But in fact the imprimatur of Harvard on Disinformation creep seems to serve exactly one function: to discourage the reader of the study from considering the fact that what he or she holds in their hands is utterly dishonest horseshit, a bizarre medley of unambiguous lies produced by people (again, ten people!) whose need to bathe in Harvard’s artificial validation seemingly trumped their felt responsibility to adhere to even the most basic and minimal set of ethics and standards in their chosen field of scholarly publishing.

I have literally no idea where to even begin in terms of communicating the enormity of Disinformation creep’s failure. Do you know the GIF where a cat tries to leap from a dresser to a bed and stalls out about midway and just sort of belly-flops onto the floor? That’s how Disinformation creep performs.

It is a monument to unsuccessfulness, and on every single one of its sixteen pages there is evidence of intellectual bankruptcy of the absolute highest order.

The forthcoming official rebuttal from the ADOS Advocacy Foundation does an excellent job at identifying each of these numerous lies and idiocies and countering them accordingly, but I think the report’s grand stupidity and essential hollowness can really be distilled to a single aspect of “Figure 1”.

The above graph from Disinformation creep provides a visual representation of the daily number of tweets “specifically using the #ADOS hashtag” over an 11-month period. These tweets are what the authors use to assert that there is an observable pattern of high Twitter activity within the ADOS ‘network’ around “real-world events” (e.g. MLK Day; Chadwick Boseman’s death; Kamala Harris announced as Biden’s VP pick, etc.), and that the content of the tweets on these days reveals how the “ADOS network strategically uses breaking news events to discourage Black voters from voting for the Democratic party.”

OK. Welp. By including screenshots of some of these tweets in the graph, the authors allow us to see for ourselves the kind of content they supposedly carefully analyzed in order to support their hypothesis. Notably, on August 2, the second largest spike in tweets using “#ADOS” is shown to have occurred. The authors identify a total of ~7,000 posts that day.

Incomprehensibly, the authors used a tweet about a cryptocurrency scam that translates to “‘The question is quickly answered’: many French #teens have dropped out of school, thinking to become [stock] #trader[s] in buying #formation kits. They fell into the trap of #Melius, based in #Dubai and known by other names. L’AMF and #Miviludes are seized.”

In French, “ados” means “teens”. And because the social media staffer at Mediavenir — when they were writing that tweet — slapped a hashtag in front of it, it eventually came to be swept up into Disinformation creep’s “dAtA sAmPLe sEt” despite having literally nothing what-so-fucking-ever to do with the actual #ADOS political movement which Harvard is asking the public to trust that they have specifically and diligently studied.

How does this happen? How does this glaringly and utterly irrelevant tweet manage to be not just included in the dataset but held up as somehow representative of the black-targeted misinformation content dump that the authors claim defines the ‘ADOS network’ on ‘high-activity days’? What about other tweets that include “#ADOS” and which similarly have absolutely no relation at all to the political movement, such as this one, or this one, or this one?

How many of those are part of the daily totals? I know the authors use a bunch of real fancy-sounding, applied science-y jargon in the report to describe their process (e.g .”computational grounded theory”; “structural topic modeling”; “inductive thematic analysis”), but like, despite these apparently sophisticated tools, there is still clearly a presence of laughably irrelevant tweets to be found among the collection of data.

Does it matter? Should it? Um, probably, yeah, if your intent is to not undermine your own work’s quality, to say nothing of your own dignity. More importantly, how did this get through a peer-review process? Who were the peers? Drooling invalids that were instructed to blink if they thought the study passed muster and was ready for publication? Some poor low-tier academic saps who were brought to a dingy basement somewhere in Kendall Square and made to strip down to their underwear while Harvard data experts stubbed out lit cigarettes all over their flesh and barked at them to sign off on Disinformation creep’s patently bunk methodology?

These sorts of scenarios rush in to try and explain the pure absurdity of the report, to fill in the vacuum occasioned by its vast gaping absence of basic evaluation standards in scholarly publishing, criteria that one might reasonably anticipate being insisted upon by an institution like Harvard which openly fancies itself as being like the sacred flame of academia or whatever.

Or maybe not.

Maybe you are actually not surprised at all. Maybe you know that since Disinformation creep aims to portray the #ADOS movement as irredeemably toxic simply because it represents the possibility of actual repair and freedom for the descendants of chattel slavery, Harvard would in fact happily become much more lenient and accommodating in their standards if it helps to kill the vehicle for that possibility.

After all, this is the same institution whose lawyers just successfully litigated the University’s retention of property rights to photographs of slaves following a lawsuit that was brought against Harvard by Tamara Lanier, a woman who — as a descendant of the father and daughter that are pictured — argued that she was the rightful owner of the images.

This is the same institution whose administrative staff just recently reminded the school’s highest-profile black faculty member that he could expect Harvard to extend him about as much freedom and protections in his work as a white landowner would have conferred upon his black sharecropper in the Mississippi delta in 1896.

This is Harvard, after all, and good old-fashioned racism is still very much alive and well in this vaunted cathedral of higher learning.

The hope is, I guess, that outward actions like the school’s appointment of a Chief Diversity and Inclusion Officer will distract you from the institution’s complete inward deformities of racial injustice that have defined both its past and present. The hope is, I guess, that Harvard can just kind of jot off one of its total bullshit-y pronouncements of ‘solidarity’ whenever the continued fever of American racism spikes, as if the institution itself has not always been right there helping stoke the fire to its full strength in the body of society. The hope is, I guess (and Disinformation creep proves this), that Harvard will never have to confront a real, organized threat to the fact that the institution pretends not to continue to fatten itself on the misery of ADOS.

But which is why — with the abysmal failure of Disinformation creep — Harvard should be very worried. The timing of such a cack-handed, deeply stupid effort by ten writers united in their ineptness to make ADOS an object of reactionary horror could not be worse for the institution.

Let’s deny the descendants of slaves rights to photographs of their ancestors! Let’s refuse tenure consideration to one of the premiere black intellectuals in America who’s spent his career advocating for black people! Let’s mobilize in dishonesty *against* the movement now trying to secure justice for that very collective!

What a hapless, blinkered, and desperately clumsy bunch of white supremacists over there in Cambridge, huh? Pointy-headed ninnies all cloistered away from every conceivable brutal reality of ADOS life and who all seemingly decided one day that it was their God-given right to root out the seeds of possibility that the #ADOS movement is planting in this country.

This is what the academics at Harvard are doing to help America’s bottom caste as the world around these people skids into the abyss. They are publishing their little ‘scholarly articles’ replete with lies so vulgar and obvious that it stands to reason the authors involved in the writing undertook the project with one single expectation: that they would be able to freely invent whatever filth they wanted to about ADOS and no one would question a word of it simply because the report came out of Harvard.

Indeed it is a direct testament to how much contempt and disdain Harvard has for the plight of ADOS that they would even consider publishing such an obvious clown car of researchers in the first place. Fully six of these goblins have no previously published content that has been accepted into the Web of Science (which, to be kind of crude about it, you can think of as sort of like the IMDb of academics; WoS catalogues the number of citations, and thus, provides the basic metric of impact/importance of research).

In other words, these writers have about as much authority and credibility in this space as a group of elementary school children who were all collected at a rural bus stop, given pencils and notepads and juice boxes and told to ‘write about those baddies in the #ADOS movement’.

Who are these people? Are they just bored? Unloved? And how are they so very bad at what they do?

They should wake up embarrassed.

They were tasked with not even creating but just building upon one already existing lie: that the #ADOS movement is essentially an online factory of misinformation (indeed, the original architectress of that lie is Jess Aiwuyor, and Disinformation creep reads very much like a sad, dull and weird extension of her own body of work, which is essentially one sad, dull and weird neurotic meditation on ADOS).

People paid the scummy little clan of Disinformation creep writers handsomely to gussy up that original lie a little bit — to give it a little slick veneer of scientific observation — and in the end these pedantic cretins who evidently think they are so much smarter than everyone else couldn’t produce a remotely convincing or even vaguely entertaining case.

But of course Disinformation creep failed. Of course it did. And that’s because, at the end of the day, there are only so many ways to dress up what these people are really doing when they write shit like this, which is that they are trying to make the #ADOS movement the scapegoat for the deficiency-ridden politics of the Left.

That’s it.

You can distill the entire genre of anti-#ADOS ‘criticism’ down to that single impulse — that tightly wound coil of emotion, of melancholy that lives at the heart of these people’s obsessive determination to get rid of the movement. For them, #ADOS functions purely as a scapegoat for their own failed postwar utopias and workers’ revolutions. And what Disinformation creep proves is just how completely exhausted the genre already is after a mere two years. How utterly lacking it is in its efficacy.

What it proves is that the harder they try to hurriedly scuttle the most potent justice movement since the Civil Rights era off the scene, the more they manage only to reveal a basic, repugnant truth about themselves: their determination to further dispossess the very people whose suffering and deprivation they all spill so much ink over, and waste so much breath claiming to be so very outraged and heartbroken about. Just look at Harvard.

All Harvard succeeded in doing was exposing itself. It confirmed what’s becoming blindingly apparent about so very many of our elite liberal institutions in 2021: that these privilege farms don’t function all that differently than they did in the plantation days. They just as nonchalantly enrich themselves off the wholesale spoliation of ADOS, and they’ve been able to feign innocence because of a movement-free, symbolism-intoxicated climate that not just permits but encourages such despicable action.

Well, Harvard, the #ADOS Advocacy Foundation has three words for you: We’re here now.

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valkblue · 3 years ago

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OK, so now that I understood the mysteries of the question, let's fill the missing parts.......

S: Any fandom tropes you can’t resist?

I love the "found family" trope the most, and I think it shows. Glaringly so. And some of my favourite fics were well-thought AUs. Especially Historical ones! Or, if the original media is already "historical", then Modern Times AUs. I love when it's basically the same story you saw on TV or read in your book, or played on your PC/console, but... now it's 1760 and they are all pirates! Or something along those lines.

Oddly enough, I love to read them, but I don't write any myself. 😲

T: Any fandom tropes you can’t stand?

I'm not too fond of "enemies to lovers"... but the one that really makes my skin crawl is that "pollen-something"... No shade to anyone who likes that kind of things but it's absolutely NOT my thing. But... the rule 34 makes me want to cry in general.

Also, crossovers are tiring after a while.

**A**

R: Are there any writers (fanfic or otherwise) you consider an influence?

There are five authors I really liked and still like as of now (but two are sadly dead...) Ian Rankin, Michael Crichton, Robin Hobb, Stephen King and Edgar Allan Poe. I'm not trying to emulate them or the quirks in their writings but the way they put a story together, build towards its reveal and pay off... and the sheer amount of research and details in Crichton's work in general was a genuine mindblowing experience for 12yo-or-so me reading Jurassic Park, and Timeline later on!!

Ian Rankin's descriptions of Edinburgh taught me that even an inanimate object and a town can be a character in a story and shouldn't be treated as just a cool setting. Edinburgh was already one of my favourite place in the world and I absolutely LOVE that he's showing it as real, and absolutely not touristic or romantic, like I discovered it myself. And his quippy dialogues and nice character introspection bits were very cool to read too.

Considering Stephen King (older works) and Poe, their pacing and foreshadowing are the best. The way the story builds towards the end, the reveal of whatever terror lurks and tics under the floorboard, if that little girl in her baseball cap is really seeing a monster in the forest or if she's just severely dehydrated, how I cried for a mouse and murderers on death row...

As for Robin Hobb, one of my friends read to me a lot more than I actually read myself and I loved how Hobb didn't back down from complicated descriptions of completely fantastical ships, dragons, royal lineages, statues, creatures and how subtle her magic system was! There were no references to real life, like I could totally recognise Rankin's description of Portobello, Leith and St Leonard because I've been there!!! I exactly know what he's talking about because I sat on that bench in chapter XY, before even reading one of his book, because I found them on a library over there! No, Hobb is just telling you, "hey, imagine boats made of living wood, k?" and she goes on about how it feels, how it works, how it's different from regular ships through her characters' set of references. And it works...

As for fanfic influence? 🤔

There might be an antique one. It was a very long time ago, I stumbled upon a very lonely French fanfic in the Harry Potter fandom (on Fanfiction.net, to help you realise what I mean by ANTIQUE). There were only two chapters and already a year or two old but the way the author used some verbs in them made me realise that sometimes, taking liberties to express more than just walking, talking, driving, or things like that is much more original, colourful and interesting than to use the boring correct word made for it. It works wonders in French, but I'm not always sure it translate well in English and it makes me anxious for days when I translate my texts!

But, in any case, thanks to that author-I-totally-don't-remember-the-name-of, because you never using a proper verb taught me that it's a nice trick if you do it sometimes, in specific sentences you want to give more colour to! Much love to you, wherever you are now.

It's about inspiration so tell me about the *STAR*. (Improvisation Only for the A)

Hi! And thank you for this ominous ask… 👀👀💕

A: How did you come up with the title to [insert fic]?

So, the title for Impro… (Prepare thyself to be underwhelmed! 😅) It's a quote from an episode of season 1 (my story only takes season 1 into account) and, in case you decide to give the show another chance, I won't delve too much into details about why it's important that it's a quote from this character… but just know that it is, and it's relevant to the answer! 😁 And the dialogues in that scene go like this:

Dolores: "Well, some people choose to see the ugliness in this world—" Bernard: "Stop. Lose all scripted responses. Improvisation only." Dolores: "All right."

He wants her to stop spewing her narrative lines and start computing actual answers to his questions to take her cognition further on the path he wants to lead her on. And, he's basically doing the exact same thing Vivian will unknowingly do with Lawrence later on, driven by the very same idea of getting him out of all scripted responses, and push him to use his impro engine instead of sticking to what he's coded to do and say. And her whole visit in the park will be about that.

#ask game #fanfic asks #fatesrpg #fanfic game

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strawberryspeachy · 5 years ago

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So far on the boys ive talked to in japan - aside that teacher

1) around september i decided to look at whose on tinder. One boy i matched with talked to me and didn’t stop responding upon finding out i was not japanese. He helped me with a couple japanese phrases - telling me what sounded most natural. Asked me if i lived alone. Said he wanted to meet me.... asked if i was free that week. I said yes. I gave him a couple days that i was off. He never responded again - that was about 5-6~ days into talking

2) october i went to a club... after a disappointing night i talked to the cute ... not bar person but like he was on the floor. I thought he’d walk away but he got all happy and kept moving close to me to talk. It being too loud combined with my poor japanese and his no english meant we used google translate to talk mostly. Added each other on instagram and he said he’d like to hang out sometime. I asked about a few days and he pulled out his calendar and both were days he worked- he had two jobs. He said we’ll figure out a time later. We had some conversations on instagram. Then after a couple weeks his stories always showed him with friends. I asked him a couple times when he was free and he said he was working all the time. After another weekish of that i said it seemed that he had time to see his friends but not me. And he basically just said yep

3) december i got back on tinder. But for real. Not just a qick swipe through. Talked to the next guy with a bunch of other dudes. Was just talking. Trying to improve my english. Hoping someone would ask me to go eat with them since that is what id written on my profile. This boy asked me to hang out. We’d talked more and more over the two weeks and he said he really wanted to see me. But he couldnt cause he was working too much. Then he told me when he has a break. I had the flu at the same time and told him id tell him when i was better and he got sweeter and sweeter toward me. Then we talked on the phone and it was awkward and difficult cause my japanese not being great is even worse when i cant gesture. But it went well. Then. Suddenly. Over text the tinder boy - lets have sex! - bs came up. I said i didnt want to the first time we meet and i wanna just talk. He asked a couple more times about it and then agreed. The day before we talked on the phone again - he suddenly said he had to take another call and hung up and then didnt say anything else the rest of the night. I freaked out a bit that night thinking hed stopped talking to me. But the next morning he messaged me like nothing happened. Didnt even want to acknowledge my freak out aside from telling me not to think so much.

We met up. He took me to a shrine. We got fortunes and ties them to a tree... then he took me to his apartment... fast... he said he wanted to watch movies together.... bought... chocolate. I mean great but i wanted real food i was hungry. Then. He kept trying to have sex with me. So many times just pushed and pushed. Would not take no for an answer. Finally when... he was trying to take off more of my clothes and i wouldnt let him and said no again. He asked if i had my period. And only stopped after i said i did. Kept trying to pursuade me to give him a blowjob.

Before that... he asked me to be his girlfriend. Said he was moving soon and asked me to move in with him. Told me hed be workig two jobs for the rest of january so we couldnt meet again till February...

Anyhow after i kept saying no to a blow job and other stuff happened i asked him if we could go get food. He said he didnt have money and cooked bad ramen on the stove and french fries... he drank a bunch of alcoholic. We watched some music videos and he went to sleep.

When he kinda seemed to wake up i tried to make a point of me leaving. He just acted kinda annoyed that he had to even still deal with me being there at that point and ignored me while trying to sleep... he ghosted me right in front of me

He replied to my text the next day with some nonsense and about a week later he told me about his apartment plans. He sent one last text about it before... never responding again

I let it be for the next four weeks... till the days he was supposededly done working two jobs and couls see me again. Hed made story postings during this time

But yea. Never replied to me again

4) some boy who wanted to get better at english cause hes moving to the us. We talked on the phone a couple times near christmas. He complained about not having a gf and said he wanted to hang out. But the times i asked he was “busy”. We hung out once... played darts. He said he didnt want to drink cause he drank the night before and he ate before meeting me so left early.... said next time. There was never a next time.

5) some guy i talked to a bit. He asked to meet up. I agreed. Took a whole for us to find each other cause he kept...... hanging up the phone on me.... he didnt look like his pic and he dressed weird. He basically hailed me over when he found me and then walked fast so that i basically had to chase him around. He was one of those dudes that walks with his hands out like people are supposed to move for him. After about 20 minutes of that he told me to wait while he pretended to get a call and then told me his dog is sick and he needed to leave to take her to the hospital. He said well meet again. Never saw him again not that i wanted too.

6) talked to another boy for a couple weeks. Just about fun stuff it was good conversation. We talked about music and movies and murder mystery parties. About our days and just generally the kind of good conversation you have with friends. Around the third week we talked about meeting... but. Then. Tinderboy - i wanna have sex! Came into the convo... i told him i had my period and asked if we could go out to drink instead. He said lets drink before we do next week. Whatever. Next week comes around. Same good conversation everyday. The day of comes and he responded to me in the morning reconfirming the time and place and stuff. Once the time to meet rolled around. No response. I called him a couple times more so to bitch him out. He blocked me.

7) some other dude. We talked a bit. He asked me to go out to eat. Post poned 3 times that night cause he was working later than he was supposed to. I was so hungry. No he didn’t wanna go out to eat. Bought me some convience store food and barely let me finish eating before hooking up... he said thanks to my happy birthday message. But otherwise we havent talked again. Even though hes a ten minute walk away.

8) then of course theres the absolutely adorable boy who took me out on the date of my dreams.... until he silently walked me the train station. Said bye. And now has slowly ghosted me all week. He just unmatched me on tinder after i asked about it so. Guess he’s gone. Which has me feeling fucking terrible.

9) talked to a guy a couple days ago. He asked if i wanted to hook up. I basically agreed. I WANTED HUMAN CONTACT ON VALENTINES DAY. He told me beforehand he was only free for a couple hours. Asked if i wanted him to pick me up the night before buttttt i got my hair treated and shouldnt sweat so i said it was too late and i needed to sleep. He met me. Late. At the station and walked me back yo his apartment after i was done work. One of my students saw me with him... embarrassing. We talked a lot. Hes the oldest guy ive ever... anything. Though still just 29. It would have been a good conversation if... i didnt know he asked me to come have sex and then never made a move. An hour and a half in he suddenly went

Oh its the time! Sorry go. I should have agreed to his request for yesteday instead of insisting on friday.

Ive been freaking out about 8 and i messaged him asking if he lost interest in me. He never responded to my message asking if he wanted to hookup yesterday. He didnt respond for 20 minutes and then i said either say yes or no so im not waiting. And he almost immediately responded with no. So. Idk.

10) talked to some dude from hong kong yesteday. He messaged me first saying he doesnt like japan and just came for the food. Ive been crying all day and basically hust bitched about japan to him. Apparently he doesnt actually dislike japan... he just doesnt like the bidets.... and i told him my home life sucks so im here but here sucks too so wtf. Ya know. Things that are totally attractive go someone you started talking to a half an hour ago. He said he wanted to talk about food. Im good at food talk ok. Then asked if i wantrd to meet up and look for cake with him. Sure. Shinjuku. The same placd i met 5 and 3. Thought id break the- everytime i come to this city im depressed. Cause before them the last time i went to shinjuku in the summer. I couldnt find the clothes shops i was looking for. There were couples all around me. And it was the first day in japan i felt so utterly and truely miserable and alone and like nothing in my life was better. I was still hoping at that point that the teacher i worked with would go with me and show me around and i left thinking next time i go itll be better cause i wont be alone.

Well shinjuku appears to be bad luck for me. I got stressed trying to find this boy and sounded like it over the phone. But he still met up with me. I brought him some snacks from the baskery near me on my way. We talked. He speaks english. But he just asked about my job... how do you get it. Is it hard. Whats its pay.

I walked past a cake shop on my way to meet him and i showed him the cakes he said he really wanted. He said he didnt bring much cash so he didnt want it.... k i thought that was the point of this trip but whatever. He asked me if i was hungry three times. I said i ate before coming because normally when i meet people we dont eat and i go hunry. I left out the YOU SAID YOU WANTED CAKE!!! Part. He said he was hungry but didnt want me to not eat while he did. So i told him to find a place with desert and ill eat desert while he eats a meal. Were walking. This is about 25 minutes in and he starts to complain his legs hurt and that hes tired. Another 10 minutes pass and he complains more about how he feels like hes floating and his shoes dont fit. I see mcdonals and say i know this is lame but ive kinda been craving a big mac. Its fine if not cause ya know your visiting japan but would you want mcdonals. He jokes about it and then goes yea i could go for a bigmac. We get in the store and he tells me to go. And i tell him to go ahead first. Then he says no he feels sick and doesnt want to eat.... tells me to eat... the exact situation he didnt want earlier

Hm. Gee. I wonder whats coming. I say i only wanted to eat cause he said he was hungry. We leave and then he says maybe its tmi but - proceeds to tell me about being constipated. I didnt try to listen. Btw he was 6’4 and kinda difficult to hear if i didnt try. I wrap that up with. Yea i think that was a tmi story but good for you. Cause the gist of it was that he could shit now.

Then. You know its coming. He says hes gonna go home. I stop acting happy. I told myself the next time this happened id confront them.

We met up at 7 and it was now like 7:50. My train is 10 bucks round trip.

But. I couldn’t think of anything to say.

All i could say after a while of kinda just going silent was - whyd you ask me to meet if you were so tired.

And he aaid cauae walking around japan alone isnt fun. Yeah mean i know. I said that to you over text earlier.

I asked him if i dont look like my pic. He says i look exactly like my pic.

I say a few times before ive met up with guys and we never talk again. And he goes - well youre meeting strangers and sometimes it just doesnt click

He unmatchd me the moment he got on his train. I imagine were still friends on snapchat cause he probably deleted it since he redownloaded it to talk to me

So yea. Same experiences as back home because im me and i will always be cursed and miserable. I dont wanna sleep cause im waiting to see when that boy in 8 will block me on line... cause i sent alot of messages. It doesnt help me to know when.... but.... ya... idk. Someone shoot me please

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carolinesgrandadventure · 7 years ago

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Everything is going great! | culture shocked

That is a big, fat lie.

This post is long overdue. In which I talk about what’s been happening these past two weeks in Vietnam and try not to lose my mind retyping x3 a post that I accidentally deleted x3 because I’m working on my phone and the Tumblr app is very glitchy.

A guide because this post is so long: Basics covers my homestay famiy and daily schedule. The City covers my thoughts on Hanoi. Challenges describes my misfortunes of travel and lessons learned.

Disclaimer: This post might seem a little over-dramatic. Let’s begin.

Basics

I share a homestay with one roommate, Frankie. My host family is friendly, comprising of a professor father, accountant mother, a 13-year-old host sister (our main translator), and a 10-year-old host brother. We live in a 5-story tube house in an back alleyway of a network of alleyways. It is so tucked away that even my local Uber drivers get lost trying to find it!

Frankie and I share a room with two hard mattresses on the floor, two mosquito nets, two fans, one shower toilet bathroom, and no AC. Despite Hanoi’s heat and humidity, it hasn’t been too much of a problem to sleep without AC. However, those mattresses are incredibly uncomfortable despite supposedly being good for the back.

Taking a shower has become my favorite time of day. What I mean by a “shower toilet bathroom” is a bathroom the size of a small walk-in closet containing a sink, shower head, toilet, and drain with no dividers. One must take care not to get the sink or toilet wet while showering. This type of bathroom is incredibly space efficient, but one must be okay with a wet bathroom floor for the next several hours after showering. There’s also no hot water, but it’s refreshing to take a cold shower after a long, humid, and sticky day.

Everyday I wake up anywhere between 6:30-7:00 a.m. usually because of loud jack hammering from the active construction site next door. Whether I’m rudely awakened by construction, cats meowing, babies crying, or motorbikes, I always am delighted to enjoy a breakfast prepared by my host mother. At around 7:50, Frankie and I leave the house and walk to the bus stop where we take a short 10 minute ride to our classroom at Hanoi Medical University. We then attend class more or less 8:30 a.m.-4:00 p.m., our exact schedule varying day to day. Our local instructor and country coordinator are both members of Vietnam’s Institute of Population, Health, and Development. They have been very informative, teaching us about Vietnam’s health challenges and system. Some interesting topics we have covered include the prominence of traditional medicine, the health differences between rural and urban Vietnamese populations, and the inaccuracy of government reporting. One of the main takeaways for me from these past two weeks is the issue of development on health outcomes in Vietnam. Many rural populations have poorer health outcomes than urban populations because they lack equal access to healthcare due to the limited number of clinics and resources (among other things). After classes end, I’ve done everything from shopping to getting a massage to going back home to study (read: nap). I return home by 7:00 p.m. to have dinner with my host family, which is always fun to see what we get to eat. After dinner, my host family, Frankie, and I chat for a while. Sometimes the neighbors come over to chat, too. The neighborhood kids enjoy running in and out of the house to say hello and stare at Frankie and I. The parents like coming to practice their English and bring their kids to force them to practice their English with us, too. In school, grammar and written skills are prioritized, and, as a result, many Vietnamese’s English speaking skills are not as developed. I admire their desire to practice speaking English with native speakers because I’m scared to do so with Chinese speakers… It’s quite a lot of work to communicate with people who do not speak the same language because even though you don’t understand, you make an effort to understand by processing the many context clues available. When Frankie and I get upstairs to our room, it’s often 9:00 p.m. or later and I am exhausted. I’ll take a shower and then try and do some work before falling asleep. I haven’t really been successful in doing homework after dinner… (hehe yikes) Last weekend our host family took Frankie and I out to the night market in downtown Hanoi to eat ice cream and walk around. Personally, I expected more of the night market, but it was still nice to walk the streets around the lake without motorbikes and cars whizzing by. We also paid a visit to the Vietnam People’s Air Force Museum.

Ice cream at Kem Trang Tien in Old Quarter. I got a yummy “rice flake” flavor.

Frankie and I also made spaghetti for our host family, the one American dish they occasionally cook at home. My host sister sprung this upon us saying, “Ok, you can make us spaghetti tomorrow night, right?” And Frankie and I were just like, “Oh, okay.” I don’t think we had a choice; it turns out our host mom had already bought the spaghetti noodles before our host sister asked us to cook! We went to the grocery store, found some canned pasta sauce, and made damn good spaghetti, if I do say so myself. Thankfully, our host family loved our cooking. I thought it was pretty hilarious to be eating spaghetti in Vietnam in rice bowls with chopsticks for dinner. My host sister keeps mentioning how she wants to try eggs Benedict…

Let two American girls cook you the best spaghetti of your life! :)

Lastly, a shoutout to Shom, my Duke friend also on an SIT IHP program, who I was able to get lunch with in Hanoi. I’m so glad we could follow up on our 5 month plans to meet up. It was really nice to see a familiar face. :’)

This weekend we are in the midst of typhoon Daksuri so our planned weekend activities are more low key. Possibly a movie, possibly a trip to Hanoi’s silk village, and with any luck, a day trip to see some scenery outside the city.

The City

Hanoi is the capital of motorbikes. It is humid, hot, noisy, dirty, and in my opinion, not particularly charming. There is the constant grumble of motorbikes. The air always smells of gasoline. Hanoi's got a lot of rough edges such as its ceaseless traffic, lack of public trash management, and pollution. The small river in my neighborhood is navy and its odor of rotten eggs and feces can be smelled 10 feet away.

I think Hanoi is best described as organized chaos. For the most part I cannot discern the order that the Hanoiians maintain except when I cross the street. Crossing the street is quite the adrenaline rush.

Start by stepping out from the curb. You can't choose a good moment to start crossing, you just have to do it. Turn to look in the face of oncoming traffic. Stare down the motorbikes that barrel towards you and shake an outstretched hand at them. Walk slowly. The honks are only to communicate that they see you. Get to the middle of the road. Look the other way and do the same thing: stare and shake. And when you finally get to the other side, don't forget to breathe. In those moments of crossing the street, anyone simultaneously becomes part of the order and chaos that is Hanoi.

Downtown Hanoi, also known as Old Quarter, is cleaner and is home to many of the best restaurants. Old Quarter surrounds Hoan Kiem Lake. Some parts of Old Quarter remind me of Shanghai's French Concession, with tree covered streets. But this is unsurprising given that both cities have strong French influences. Again, I can't romanticize about Hanoi too much though... One afternoon while enjoying a view of the lake, I noticed an old man peeing on a tree right next to me, out in the open.

Hanoi is also a city of alleyways. There are so many alleys to get lost in but there are no dead alleys; something is always happening whether that be a waiting trinkets seller or another pho stand. I have also never been to a city with such a dense concentration of food stands. Every family in Hanoi must own a food stand, there are so many of them!*

Challenges

In the past two and a half years that I've been in college, I have never experienced a serious case of homesickness... until now. This was unfortunately spurred by a stressful situation of multiple technology failures. This past weekend my perfectly working laptop spontaneously broke. Like broke broke. Like serious, needs-a-motherboard-replacement broke. At first I thought I couldn't turn my laptop on because of an ant infestation. It just so happens that when my laptop broke, I also had a mild ant infestation. Sugar ants were crawling out of my keyboard and I was panicking, recalling a similar story of a broken laptop and a bunch of ants. Then I went to a computer store that night with my host family and it started working again. And then I put it away for the night. And then it really wouldn't turn on anymore.

I took my laptop into Hanoi's top rated computer repair store on Monday. Against my better judgement, I left my laptop at this small, unprofessional looking shop for them to look at further. It was a great test of believing in the good will of people for me. 48 hours later I was devastated to learn that my computer was seriously broken and would need a $330 fix.

This ordeal was rather stressful for me because every graded aspect of my study abroad program relies upon a computer and I was without one. I actually finished an assignment on my phone using Google Docs. It also didn't help that the day after my laptop broke, my phone started acting up, possibly because of the humidity. I had to stick it in rice; thankfully my phone still works except I now have a dead area on my touch screen. I'm guessing part of my phone's digitizer broke. Don't ask me why my important tech decided to all break without warning in the span of 3 days because it is beyond me.

I decided not to get my laptop repaired here in Hanoi. I'm in this awkward transition time right now relying upon other people's laptops. I probably can't get a replacement laptop/tablet until I get to South Africa because complicated customs processes. I guess we'll just have to see how things work out, but for now I'm making do and trying not to think about my broken laptop.

Going through this episode of intense stress really highlighted to myself my discomfort in Hanoi: it's dirty, loud, I don't fit in, and I can hardly communicate. I really, really wished to be at home this past week for the convenience and familiarity of going to an Apple Store, receiving comfort from my family (and dog), and sleeping in a soft bed.

I'm mostly over that now. I’ve realized that it is what it is and I am handling the situation to the best of my ability. In the end, I can't really change much; I can only be resourceful and rely upon the generosity of my host family and classmates. C'est la vie. I'm grateful I still have the support system that I have available. I knew to expect some challenges and discomfort but I did not realize it’d be like this!

St. Joseph’s Cathedral, a late 19th-century Gothic cathedral in Old Quarter.

This next week my group travels to Lac village in rural north Vietnam. Next weekend we're taking an excursion to Ha Long Bay, a UNESCO world heritage site. I'm excited to get out of the city and explore other parts of Vietnam!

Bus count: 11

*By the way, of course I will write about the food in Vietnam within the next two weeks.

#Hanoi #Vietnam #travel #culture shock #long post #reflection

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frettboard2016-blog · 8 years ago

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Business Is Business and How to Win the Game

New Post has been published on https://frettboard.com/business-is-business-and-how-to-win-the-game/

Business Is Business and How to Win the Game

The nature of the sector is to find fault with each person. You have to bear those feedback and you have to sail clean in opposition to the difficult waves.

Be it a supervisor, or a CEO, or a membership president, no person ought to satisfy all.

If he starts on time, He is a tyrant If he waits for late-comers He is just too tolerant If he calls for constant interest He is a despot If he does now not care He makes himself silly If he assumes the spokesman’ function He turns into a bore If he yields He turns into needless If he requires silence it is an abuse of electricity If he allows sickness He falls in authority If he’s firm He takes himself too seriously If he is good-natured He does now not hold his rank If he expounds his personal ideas People are perforce towards him If he asks for a preference He is irresolute If he’s dynamic He is happy If he stays careful He is inefficient If he does everything on his personal He is immodest If he delegates He is lazy If he’s attentive to the women He is obsequious If he isn’t always He is a snob!

I.P. Guillon, Rotary Club of Marmande, France has written the above under the caption The Club President in French. This has been translated into English through Wallace Flint, Rotary Club of Hilton Head Island, South Carolina, U.S.A The Rotary Club magazine ‘The Rotarian’ has published it in its July 1982 problem.

Well, allow us to formulate and plan our very own correct principles and movement plan to attain our intention.

What is commercial enterprise? There is an internet funny story as to how one need to win the game of business.

Father: I want you to marry a female of my desire Son: I will choose my own bride Father: But the lady is Bill Gates’ daughter Son: Well in that case… OK

Next father methods Bill Gates.

Father: I even have a husband on your daughter Bill Gates: But my daughter is too younger to marry! Father: But this young guy is a vice – president of World Bank Bill Gates: Ah! In that case… OK

Finally, father is going to see the president of the World Bank. Father: I even have a young guy to be recommended as a vice-president President: But I already have extra vice-presidents than I want! Father: But this young guy is Bill Gates’s son-in-regulation. President: Ah! In that case… OK

This is how accurate business is performed.

Manipulate intelligently supply and call for and win the game without harming everybody however to the satisfaction of all concerned.

Keep the name of the game in your coronary heart and start playing.

GOOD LUCK!

S. Nagarajan has written extra than 3000 articles in Tamil in 18 magazines and published 52 books. He is revealing Eastern Secret Wisdom via T.V. Programmes, magazine articles, seminars, guides. He has blanketed various topics in his extensive variety of articles which include Mantras, Yantras, Yoga, Meditation, Astrology, Astronomy, Space Science, Science and Spirituality, Hollywood cinema, Women’s development, Aura, Significance of Colors, Reincarnation, Divine Geometry, Power of Prayer and so on. As an ardent seeker of Truth, he has gathered clinical experiments on mantras, thoughts, Auto suggestion etc. He has written many articles on parapsychology additionally. Strategy Games Tips – 6 Tips of Playing Strategy Games

There are so many strategy games for both online and for game consoles. In trendy games, there is not a want to set the placing of the strategy video games for half an hour as the programmers had already found out what actually the gamer wishes and had already been programmed into the game.

Most of the method games I performed wanted lots of making plans and speed to play well inside the approach games. These video games can be those protection games wherein you need to construct towers at strategic areas or factors to combat off an invasion effectively or if you are the one’s sort of offensive games, you can be the one constructing units to overwhelm the computer’s defense.

There is an announcing:” Attack is my defense, protection is my attack”. It truly relies upon on how you need to play it.

6 Simple Strategy Techniques For Playing Strategy Games

1) Knowing in depth of the extraordinary varieties of units or races in the game. Normally it is not going to be greater than 10.

2) Follow the simple regulations of the method game. Some fundamentals strategies are: Use the melee fighters prematurely inside the front lines as “meat guard” at the same time as the ranged soldiers stand behind the melee fighters to aid them.

Three) When you have received sufficient cash, do plan a number of it for enhancements of your squaddies, towers and many others… Normally beginning of the sport, it is able to be pretty tough to plan but plan out a strategy of your very own.

4) Pick up some air devices to aid your ground troops. It is a must! Next cross gets an amazing siege weapon to destroy building extra effectively and quicker. Siege weapons are a double-edged weapon in which it may be used for base protection too. By information what does what, you’ll be in a higher function to certainly install them properly and avoid stupid errors.

5) Pay attention to powered attacks too. It is usually in the form of artillery strike with a huge quantity of floor troops charging at you, distracting you and the use of the siege guns clearing out your base buildings. Use your air gadgets to flank the siege weapons, counter attack them and surprise your enemy.

6) The last tip is to ensure that you do not store vital cash that isn’t important. This is a not unusual mistake that new gamers make. There is no point in saving so much money in the game and lose ultimately and to prove nothing. But if you are going to build big or very grand, then simply do it. Strike an amazing balance factor among having some savings for protection while needed. You will have to study this with reference to each unique game.

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