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batsplat · 2 days ago

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slskslsls context for “what’s the matter honey you’ve hardly touched your fleeting experience of your time on earth” 😭😭😭 tho I’m a little terrified to find out what that means lmfao. Also what race is the last one after?? Or I should say — what race comes next after the one in the last picture lol

(text posts here) I got another ask for 'fleeting experience'... so I'll leave that one for the next post. you've actually struck jackpot on the other one and the explanation got worryingly long. crazy how many thoughts you can have about a text post meme you're trying to just do in a nice and casual way

anyway!! THE LAST ONE I am delighted somebody picked up on. very pleased with that one icl, it's kinda a funny photo anyway for obvious reasons but it somehow just has an. extra little something. when you know the context

three readings of the text post should be kept in mind here - the element of 'watching your back', as in danger coming from behind; acts of betrayal of either explicit or assumed trust; and the element of issuing a warning to the recipient of the message

and the photo is from misano 2008!! specifically after qualifying, when casey snagged pole position and valentino starts from just behind him, second on the grid! which ALSO means it's two races!! after laguna!! great time

so to give you a basic sense of the chronology, you've had laguna, drama bla bla, tHEN you have the summer break followed by brno where casey showed up contrite, apologised to valentino... but the key element to that presser is that it's kinda... yeah, they're going peace and love, apology accepted etc etc - BUT on valentino's end he's very much making it clear that he thought laguna was FANTASTIC and casey should be expecting more of the same. just something for casey to keep in mind <3 so then you have the race itself at brno, where casey is leading relatively comfortably but valentino is starting to seriously catch him... and then casey crashes. which is obviously extremely not ideal psychologically. inevitably, a lot of people looked at that and thought he'd crashed because he was scared of fighting valentino again... and y'know, crash like that, there probably was an element of him pushing just a little too hard to maintain that gap. like I said. not ideal. especially because obviously this is making valentino's bloodhound senses prick up. like he's never going to leave you alone again if you do this, right

so that's where they're at headed into misano, which obviously has Extra Significance since it was valentino's home race. it had only returned to the calendar the year before and literally only because of valentino. dorna had vowed never to return to the circuit after the crash that ended rainey's career in 1993, before going 'oh shit' when they realised the most popular motorcycle racer of all time was born three minutes away from the circuit. that's why they go the wrong way round now and why the circuit kinda sucks, because that was basically their concession... you know, sure, they're going back to the circuit, but it's going the other way now!! as a way of pretending it was way safer now. except it hadn't exactly been a glorious homecoming for valentino in 2007. casey had won the race by a country mile while valentino had his ninety-eighth mechanical dnf in that 2006-07 span. this time, however, everything was different... casey's championship bid was now already looking shaky with the points gap after brno... if he was to still have any chance, he needed to have a good misano

but. well. he didn't. he crashed out of the lead again, this time an even more comfortable gap to valentino that vale probably wasn't going to breach. which meant that valentino got his fairy tale home win... and also made it three races in a row where casey had crashed either out of second place or out of the lead. in laguna, he had valentino right ahead of him when he went down - in brno and misano, he had valentino chasing him down. watch your back, because valentino is coming for you

I used a photo from misano 2008 in another text post edition, in a way that's a bit less strictly related to the text:

and what you'll see there in the background is casey's hand injury, which had flared up during the misano weekend and is a mitigating factor in this crash. I do want to properly properly delve into this in a future laguna post because this stretch of races is honestly FASCINATING to me. it's just an overload of narrative juice... you've got the reality, which is uncertain, you've got valentino's adept authorial hand, which provides you with a narrative that is painfully easy to believe. you've got casey fighting internal and external demons - because even if valentino didn't make him crash, of course three in a row starts looking awfully suspicious. like, can we just take a moment to appreciate the crazy psychological implications of what is going on between the two of them here (from after brno):

The biggest question of all, though, hangs over the reason for Stoner's crash. After the race, the champion had no explanation, saying that the front just went away too quickly for him to catch, as he had done several times previously during the race. But losing the front end is a return to Casey Stoner's old habits, a trait he displayed pushing too hard on the third-rate Michelins he was forced to use in his first year in MotoGP. And after his crash at Laguna Seca, it's hard not to draw the conclusion that Stoner succumbed to the pressure. Last year, Casey Stoner seemed almost unassailable and completely impervious to any pressure Valentino Rossi, Dani Pedrosa or anyone else tried to put on him. But this year, he has occasionally shown signs of weakness, such as when he ran off the track twice at Jerez. More worryingly, the Australian has previous form in this area. In 2005, at his home Grand Prix, he threw away his chance of becoming 250cc World Champion by crashing out of the lead. Stoner has come a long way since then, grown a little older and gained a great deal of maturity. But his crash at Brno puts a dent in his image as Mr Perfect. Did Stoner crash as a result of the pressure Rossi had put on him? Was it because he feared getting caught up in another race-long battle like Laguna Seca, and pushed too hard when he saw Rossi closing? Or was it just one of those things, a mistake all riders make? The jury is still very much out, and it will take more than just his crash at Brno to prove the case one way or another. The next race, though, will be crucial. Valentino Rossi will arrive at Misano, a track just a few miles from his home town, hoping to take his 68th victory in the premier class. This would see him tie the record for most wins with another Italian, the legendary Giacomo Agostini. It would also allow him to wipe away the humiliation of his exit from last year's race, when the first outing of Yamaha's pneumatic valve engine ended in mechanical disaster. Finally, it would mean he had taken a win at every track the MotoGP circus currently visits. It is impossible to overestimate just how much Valentino Rossi wants to win at Misano. There is a huge amount at stake, and he will not let any man stand in his way. There can be no doubt that Rossi believes that the mental pressure he is placing on Casey Stoner is working, and at Misano, The Doctor will be dishing out more of the same medicine. How Casey Stoner responds will be the measure of him as a racer, but also as a man. If you thought Laguna was big, and Brno even bigger, just wait till we get to Misano.

ahhhhh GOD fskjdhjkhdsf PAINFUL this is PAINFUL knowing what happens next

here's them actually shaking hands after misano qualifying, rather than valentino just... uh, patting him:

third race in a row where casey was on pole and valentino started p2 like they were locked tf in

and then you have the horrors of the race:

Unlike Brno, though, there didn't seem to be an obvious explanation. In the Czech Republic, Stoner was only a second ahead of Rossi, and had just seen the Italian take 3/10ths out of his lead. At Misano, Stoner was comfortably in the lead, and looked able to parry anything Rossi could throw at him. After the race, two theories were popular. The first was that the pain from Stoner's broken scaphoid had caused him more problems than he would admit to. This was plausible, as the pain was particularly bad in some right handers, where Stoner was having to push on the bars to get the bike turned. The second, and most popular among those clothed in yellow, was that Valentino Rossi's voodoo had worked its magic once again, and Stoner had crumbled under pressure. But the evidence for this is thin at best, as Stoner was matching Rossi lap for lap, held a comfortable 3 second lead, and had run 0.6 seconds faster during free practice on race tires. Stoner himself put his crash down to a strange feeling with his front tire. The team had elected to scrub the tire in during the morning warm up, and Stoner told journalists that the heat cycling from running hot on the bike to cooling slightly under tire warmers had changed the right-hand side of the tire, and made it lose some of its grip. They had scrubbed the tire in so that Stoner could push hard from the outset, with the pain in his wrist leaving him little appetite to fight his way forward through the pack. Whatever the reason, be it injury or sorcery, the outcome was the same. Coming into Misano, Casey Stoner was 50 points behind Valentino Rossi, and with a big hill to climb if he wanted to keep hold of his title. With no score from Misano, the hill was likely to turn into a mountain.

be it injury or sorcery!! and it's really really REALLY key to this whole narrative that for all three races, there ARE extenuating circumstances that explain why casey crashed... like, there's no definitive PROOF that valentino's pressure did the trick. but it went against casey all three times!! it's this hellish dynamic, right, where again - if you're casey, sure, you can absolutely rationally present your arguments for how you just got kinda unlucky. but somehow everything just kept working out in valentino's favour, and it all started out with that awful race at laguna. see this misano preview:

The most likely candidate to rain on the Italian's parade is Ducati's Casey Stoner. Like his predecessor before him, the reigning World Champion is finding the #1 plate heavier than expected, and is now 50 points, or two whole race wins, behind Rossi in the title race. The remarkable thing about this is the fact that Casey Stoner is clearly the fastest man in the world at the moment. Ever since Barcelona, Stoner has been the fastest man in practice, taking pole in the last 6 races, and often leading the rest of the field by well over half a second. The reigning champ has also won 3 of the last 5 races, and was seemingly on his way to sweeping the rest of the races, winning three on the bounce at Donington, Assen and the Sachsenring. During practice at Laguna Seca, Casey Stoner was looking his old, unstoppable self again.

it is KEY that when casey says after laguna that he's faster than valentino, he is right!! casey extends that six pole streak to SEVEN at misano, which is kinda crazy of him given the quality of the opposition. valentino in turn goes on a five race win streak without being the fastest rider for at least three of those races!! it's got to be one of the wilder achievements of his career, again given the quality of his opposition. and it must make you genuinely homicidal if you're casey

which is how we get to some of my favourite passages in motogp writing. again from the misano race write-up:

If you just look at the result of the San Marino Grand Prix, you could easily believe that fairy tales do come true. By coming to his home race and equaling a record which had achieved almost mythical status, at a track just a few miles from the town he grew up in and where he has returned to live, Valentino Rossi made us believe once again that MotoGP is a story, a tale written by an expert storyteller. Casey Stoner's fall, crashing out while in the lead for the 2nd time in a row, added more credence to this belief, with many seeing Rossi's invisible hand behind Stoner's mistake. They were careful to give it a rational explanation, blaming it on Rossi's mind games, or the pressure Rossi put on Stoner, the more adventurous and imaginative putting it down to Rossi's voodoo, referring back to tales of dolls which Rossi was alleged to have of Max Biaggi and Sete Gibernau. The human impulse to impose a single, coherent narrative on a chain of events proved irresistible, as always. Yet this impulse could be telling a story which is not there. Rossi's victory at Misano, though impressive, was anything but inevitable, and anyone putting money on the Italian would have got good odds on Sunday morning before the race. And though Casey Stoner's crash certainly gave reason to suspect that Stoner had been under pressure, the evidence that it was a direct and inevitable result of pressure from Rossi is flimsy at best. Casey Stoner's modus operandi has always been simple: to get away if he can, and to run the fastest rhythm possible to the end, winning by as big a margin as possible. In this light, Misano was no different. After all, it's not just during the race. The reigning world champion usually manages to hit the top of the timesheets within 2 or 3 laps of hitting the track for free practice, smashing lap records a few laps later. So for Stoner to be pushing hard from the start is hardly a surprise. What is a surprise is that Stoner has made two mistakes in a row, depriving himself of a possible 50 points in the process. This could just be a factor of Stoner stepping up the pace as he goes in pursuit of ever faster laps, or it could be a response to Valentino Rossi being able to match Stoner's pace. But to attribute it directly to the kind of panic which Rossi managed to instill in Max Biaggi or Sete Gibernau is to go a little too far. Rossi is famous for his mind games, and an absolute master at them, but so far, Stoner has seemed impervious. Whether that invulnerability to Rossi's pressure is over remains to be seen.

isn't this just FANTASTIC. this is crack for rivalry lovers. this is what it's all about. and again, all of the logical explanations for casey's crashes are probably the CORRECT ones - certainly more correct than the ones blaming it on valentino sticking pins into a doll of casey (god I love this sport). but it almost doesn't even matter!! because valentino's still somehow gotten his way. he's flexed those authorial muscles and everything just SOMEHOW happened to work out for him. and it's the worst possible way things could have gone for casey, who is now unsurprisingly very much facing the mentally broken allegations

honestly insane respect to casey for his resilience, because if this happened to me I do think there's a decent 50% chance you would never hear from me again. like yeah I get why valentino has a reputation for breaking people, can you IMAGINE how horrendous it is to go through everything related to laguna AND THEN have these two follow-up races?? strangling valentino isn't enough, you'd want to throw him off a cliff. strangle him and THEN throw him off a cliff

and in the end, obviously valentino didn't permanently break casey. though.... I will still get into this in more depth, but I also don't think these two races can be disconnected from how laguna was SUCH a turning point in casey's narrative, to the point where it reads as quite traumatic. it's a horrible stretch of time!! it's not just the race being bad, but then afterwards it feels like casey's constantly trying to flee the repeat and... it just all goes horribly wrong. and maybe valentino had nothing to do with that! but everyone's still thinking it and casey knows it and so does valentino and casey knows that valentino knows it and maybe he's also asking himself... and it's always at risk of summoning up old doubts, of old sprees of crashes he thought he'd put behind him, like 2006, like phillip island 2005 where he handed the title to dani. you don't get over those emotions easily

anyway, that's what this text post was inspired by: 'many seeing rossi's invisible hand behind stoner's mistake'. you've got this initial element of betrayal, where valentino completely flipped the script at laguna - essentially rewrote the dynamic of that rivalry in a single race, and in doing so violated what casey had thought were the acceptable terms of conflict. laguna does not work without being a massive surprise (see here)... it's valentino catching casey off guard, making casey feel like a fool... there is a little bit of an undercurrent of betrayal there TO ME. and then you've got valentino always lurking behind his rivals, silently prompting them to make a fatal error... mr perfect who had been so immune to any pressure from behind, until valentino had found new ways of tormenting him. and now valentino just reminding casey again and again and again... promising him that this is what casey will have to deal with if he wants to fight valentino. it all started at laguna - where valentino blindsided casey, woke the entire sport up out of absolutely nowhere, suddenly escalated the hostilities without any prior warning. and from then on, valentino was never going to let casey forget that lurking danger. valentino will never leave casey alone

#“careful to give it a rational explanation” SENDS ME like the implication is everyone kindaaa thought. maybe witchcraft??#making a fortune selling protection charms against valentino's whole deal in the late noughties motogp paddock #it's so funnyyyyy what if u just had a guy who is a motorcycle racer and also a witch #//#brr brr #heretic tag #batsplat responds #would u still love me if i have a bizarre number of thoughts about a text post meme i created nobody thought about for more than 2 seconds #i don't do it for the audience... it's just dedication to the bit at this point #tad silly to have so many of them rely on contextual details relating to photos basically nobody will recognise #like from that edition - if you get why 'deny god's will' makes sense paired with that photo. marry me

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