#for when i have to move. so thats annoying. and ive been drawing again at least but i can feel the escalation in my controlling behavior
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opens-up-4-nobody · 2 years ago
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#ay ay ay. now that the soul crushing project is done ive elected to spend the week managing data#which is decidedly more chill than what ive been doing for the last month but also isnt not doing anything and it isnt getting stuff done#for when i have to move. so thats annoying. and ive been drawing again at least but i can feel the escalation in my controlling behavior#so its now very frustrating trying to draw anything. coloring is gonna take a million years rip.#also suddenly everyone wants to b social rn? like tomorrow my boss is organizing a thing with an old lab mate and this weekend a#collaborator is having a retirement party. and next week my lab mates wanna do a trivia night. and i kno that i should go to these things.#and i will try but i really dont want to go to any of it. mostly for driving reasons but also im a husk of a person rn. but the more#devastating thing is that uh next week one of the kids i grew up with is getting married to a rich girl lol. and like we werent that close#bc i was and am such an asocial freak but after the wedding my parents r picking up their new camper and camping their way across the#country with my sisters. and im sure someone probably told me the dates of these things at some point but if u tell me dates i will#instantly forget them. so thats. ya kno. happening over basically the next 2 weeks while i have to kill myself over measurements for a#different study i dont care abt. and like. its fine. ill see them mid may for a different planned trip. it just makes me kinda sad#a product of living halfway across the country i guess. im just inherently more disconnected to everyone. i would suspect thsts semi#intentional subconsciously. u cant b upset abt not being able to connect with ppl if you create enough physical distance that u never see#them in the 1st place. u cant misunderstand me if i make myself absent and unknowable. idk. i was explaining to my mum that i didnt realize#the timeline and she was like. understandable whatever u wanna do! and idk y that upsets me so much. i guess its just that i dont want to b#doing this. its causing me pain but dont kno how to articulate it in a way that makes sense. whatever. my mouth hurts. my lips r so chapped#that the irritation is spread past my lip line. probably doesnt help thst i keep rubbing at it lol. anyway things r still annoying#less soul crushing thsn last week but still frustrating#unrelated
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bum-scum · 1 year ago
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Prideshipping snippet because I want to. Im have a mini break from drawing to type this asap off the top of my head.
WARNINGS WILL APPLY! SEXUAL THEMES IMPLIED TOWARDS THE END!!! I REPEAT SEXUAL THEMES TOWARDS THE END!!
I cant do grammar to save my life. I failed English, so theres that. 🤣🤣🤣 ( past and peresnt tense, things dont make sense, etc).
WARNING AGAIN!! SEXUAL THEMES IMPLIES TOWARDS THE END!!!
Read away! I love these two.
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Kaiba hates it when Atem gives him pet names. Anything of the sort crawled up his spine in a tingle, a little shock to the hesrt that made flips when Atem spoke out one of these "names".
"Oh darling, try not to worry. Mokuba will be just fine," Atem soothed him.
"My love, im sure you'll knock it out of the park," he'll encourage.
Or when things got heated in the bedroom:
"Mmmm...look at you, my incredibly fuckable husband of mine."
It all went under his skin. And he would growl eachtime Atem would call him these names.
Today, however, is different.
Atem didnt call him any names or being his cheerful self. He became stressed, moving franticly, trying to do all things at once.
This is what happends when he said yes to organise a day out with the geeks.
And honestly Kaiba missed the pet names Atem was calling him. It didnt feel like home, out of place and it annoyed him.
"Do I have everything we need?" Kaiba heard Atem mumble to himself.
Running out of patience, Kaiba sighed and slammed his laptop shut.
"Atem."
"Oh! Thats right! I need..."
"Atem." Kaiba growled.
"No they wouldnt like it-"
"ATEM!"
Atem stopped and looked at him like a deer caught in the headlights.
"Yes?"
"Could you for five minutes, take a break? You running around like a headless chook is getting up my nose. Sit down and relax."
Much to Kaiba's dismay, Atem resumed to his stressing about the hang out.
"I cant stop, Seto. Ive got to sort this day outing with everyone. I want to make this perfect. Its important to me."
Moving back and forth, passing by Kaiba, his blue steely eyes intently watching Atem move and getting frustrated by the minute.
It was time to take measures in his own hands.
Kaiba moved swiftly and caught Atem from behind his strong arms wrapped around his small partner, holding him flushed against him.
"You should really take a break. Stressing about this will do you no good, sweetheart."
"Did you just...Kaiba?"
A smirk of victory graced on Kaiba's lips.
"Why dont you take a hot bath, and head to bed? You've been working hard all day, my love. It would be a shame if you burn your pretty heart out, honey."
Now he knew why Atem took so much delight in calling him these names. It got Kaiba excited...
Too excited.
"Or better yet. How about I give you a full body massage? Let me take all your stress away, my gorgeous Pharaoh."
"Se-who are you? What have you done with my husband?"
Kaiba's annoyed expression now showed itself.
"Just get into the bedroom so I can fuck you, for fucks sake."
"There he is."
Kaiba rolled his eyes as he let Atem go.
Kaiba eyes trailed all over Atem's backside, seeing it sway and move.
"You've got ten minutes to strip."
Atem stopped midway upstairs, his smirk now evident and the stress forgotten.
"Oh myyy...How naughty of you, my sexy darling."
And there it is. Making Kaiba's heart jump with joy.
The pet names have come back.
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alucart · 5 months ago
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actually fuck it lmao
got hired late september. started actual work in october. started off as a seasonal worker. every day i woke up for work i was dreaded it. it was so much work. i was fatigued everyday but i still had to give it my all or else i was "lazy". if i moved too slow i was considered rude to customers. if i dont smile im rude. if i take a minute to process something then "something is wrong with me." like. Okay. lmao.
obviously when applying for jobs i dont list the fact that im bipolar. hell, i probably have adhd. but beside the point, the fact i have to act a certain way just to keep a job thats barely paying me shit was so. annoying. the fact that while working seasonal i had to put up with so much shit was ridiculous. november and december was so awful. im still mad i had to wake up at like 4am to get to work at 5am and then the store wasnt even busy until 12am. and we had to wear red and make sure everything was perfect bc the ceo was coming to the store? LMAO?
after my seasonal hours were over i thought i was free. i wasnt working for like two weeks but i at least got to spend time with my family. clean. take care of myself. i actually got back to drawing, something i havent been able to do for months. and then they called me back for a full time position. of course i took it because i wasnt finding anything else but it mightve been the worst mistake like ever.
like i must preface, that i got the job for the seasonal position in the first place without an interview, and like, yes i knew that was fishy at the start but also, ive been looking for a job for over two years so i was desperate. somehow the full time position was even worse than the seasonal position. my manager felt more annoying.
not to mention at this point they were making me do shit that i was never hired to do. why am i organizing clothes? i take returns? why are you making me cover in the handbags department? i work in returns and help people with online orders? why are you making me pack online orders? I WORK IN RETURNS, HELP PEOPLE WITH ONLINE ORDERS AND I HAVE PROCESS RETURNS FOR ORDER PICKUPS THAT WERE NEVER PICKED UP?
honestly madness. i had many breakdowns. over not wanting to go back to work. one time i had a stomach virus and had to stay home from work and was so miserable and literally panicking because i thought i could lose my job from being sick. i had a coworker that they also hired full time and she got fired because she "took too many breaks" meanwhile there was another coworker that took way more too many breaks.
while working there i saw many people get fired. like i dont know. and it was constantly understaffed. one time my manager asked me if i could work for 50 hrs one week and i told her "i'll think about it" only to find that weekend she changed my schedule without asking. (i had a breakdown that weekend).
when they had me set up my availability i had changed it so i would get mondays and tuesdays off because i realized i need two days off in a row instead of two random ass days and they didnt even. abide by that. and by the time it was like that on my schedule i already lost my job because i "violated company policy" because i accidentally scanned some fake coupons. which mind you, i never did anything wrong at the job beforehand so i shouldve really got a warning instead of being straight up fired.
but i honestly think they just wanted to get rid of me because i couldnt get enough people to sign up for a credit card, which again, i work in returns, so most people doing a return do not want to apply to a card. to expect someone in returns to have someone sign up for a fucking credit card everyday is insane. telling people that its not really a credit card is even more insane. the fact that im still stressed out over this because im fucking unemployed is. insane!!! and i dont even know if i can get unemployment. i feel like crying.
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bloodsadx · 2 years ago
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every time i go to print a new shirt theres a few feelings. the first feeling is annoyance and lots of fretting over the art part of it. im rly precious abt what a drawing for a shirt should look like most of the time so i will redraw the same idea like 40 times until it feels charming. then i gotta print transparencies which is always a pain in the ass especially since i do big ass shirts thats like such an annoying process gotta do math gotta split the art up into chunks gotta do color separations. then i get excited cause im like yes this is gonna be such a cool shirt. then i get annoyed again bc i have to reset like 4 to 20 screens for my dumb shirt. then i get rly worried im gonna print super badly and waste a bunch of expensive blanks cause like the shirts and hoodies i print on cost like at least 7 or 8 bucks some of the hoodies i have rn are like 30 bucks wholesale. they would cost u like 80 dollars to buy them Not wholesale. so like thats a decent amt of pressure. then i start printing and its like 4 hours of like doing a print then standing there while i wait for ink to cure under the heat. then printing. then waiting. its a lot of waiting. waiting for office stores to open so i can buy ink for my printer then waiting for my time in the studio then waiting for screens to dry then coating them then waiting for them to dry then washing them out then waiting for them to dry then printing then waiting for the ink to dry. but after like a week i have a bunch of shirts, most of which i will never see again after i mail them out. so the final stage is sort of waiting indefinitely for somebody who has one of the shirts i made to @ me on somewhere and be like shirt by bloodsad and then im like Yes. anyway im just sitting in the studio rn bc my legs hurt and ive been here for like 9 hours and i was here like 9 hours 2 days ago and then yesterday i was also here cleaning stuff and 3 days ago i was here for about 9 hours and the day before that too and it all sort of blends together and a lot of it is me sitting in a chair at 3 am when my legs hurt. this is what a job is but i guess because most of it is spent like alone it doesnt feel like real. i often feel like its going to go away soon or like im doing something illegal even though it wont and im not. a lot of last year i kept standing on the street corner at like 4 am by myself smoking looking at the asphalt and thinking “how much of my time in portland will i remember as just times when i was not at the studio, preparing to go to the studio, and then how much of the time will i remember as me being at the studio, thinking about how soon i will no longer be at the studio, i will be somewhere else, somewhere not in portland?” its weird when u think that u will not be in the place youve been in a year repeatedly for a year soon and then that turns into two years and then you realize that probably u will continue to be in that place indefinitely. i see older people who are in portland and i think about how many of them live here intentionally or just forgot they were supposed to move somewhere else. i think about if thats just the state of living for everybody or if its a factor of my age or being a zoomer or whatever. but idk i guess im printing shirts. no joke or point to this post
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dausy · 1 year ago
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I'm having an anxiety day. I'm pretty sure I've just hit my coffee tolerance level and its making me feel like a full body case of restless legs. There are things I want to do and should do but I feel too shaky to move about but also too antsy to sit still.
This is not at all a depressed or sad post. I don't mean it that way, I just physically feel anxious for no reason and its making me physically feel bad. I'd rather have a headache. To be fair, recently my diet has consisted of primarily coffee and cereal and thats probably the reason I feel this way. I did go to the grocery store earlier but nothing sounded good. I'm hungry, and I don't know what to eat. Working a 7-7 job essentially as well is killing my appetite as well. Because I don't feel like cooking when I get home. The past 2 jobs over the past however many years, usually I've been home by about 4pm. This schedule is just not jiving with my stomach.
I'm also struggling a bit with keeping up with all the twitter replica websites. I just can't find it in me to upload. I feel like its annoying to copy and paste my thoughts on each website.
My inner obsessive-self has redirected its obsession to reading so I'm finding it hard to stay focused on art internet because I'd rather be reading. Although today, I'd really like to read but its like a strong case of ADHD is just not letting me focus.
Ive been enjoying uploading to youtube but again, it doesn't look like I'm going to be successful this weekend. I did manage to draw half an image I actually kind of like and I was going to paint but thats why I'm here on tumblr. I cant get my body to chill. Calm down girl, you got stuff you want to do. Music is annoying me, the tv is annoying me, I'm overstimulated in this moment. Thats the sad thing too, I have tv shows/movies I want to watch. I went to the gym already and I've sat in the bathtub and took a bubble bath.
This is actually kind of one of those days I wish I was at work because it lets me blow off steam but at the same time I really just want to read and paint and my brain wont let me.
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sollucets · 1 year ago
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hi rowan! sorry to hear you had a rough day. for the writing ask game: how about 19, 28, and/or 39?
hello mel 💜💜💜 thank you for indulging me (game) i wrote. way too much. and it was a lovely distraction x
19. tell me a story about your writing journey. when did you start? why did you start? were there bumps along the way? where are you now and where are you going?
i will stick with only one of these i think, or this will be far Far too long, so: fic writer rowan, several starts
the first time i remember like specifically intentionally setting out to write something that counts as a story, on purpose & not for school, i am eight & i am handwriting in a composition notebook and i am writing oc/transparent self-insert fanfiction about the protector of the small quartet by tamora pierce. i am using the family computer to look up oc names on angelfire fansites. these are 100% The Days haha.
i do more stuff like that, later; i handwrite pages on pages of pokemon fanfic (make-ur-own region type thing complete with bad drawings of fake pokemon). i do a lot of this kind of thing on my own and for me, and then i am maybe 10 or 11 & i move that to forums (bulbagarden palletshipping thread���..,,,) this is baby fanfic writer rowan genesis, and posting on the internet before i was in middle school entirely killed my desire to do it for over a decade; i write often and a lot even outside of my work (ive completed nanowrimo three times!) but nobody ever sees it.
i get an ao3 in 2013 and post one doctor who fic but i am too scared and i orphan it right away. during a really intense media fixation i try again at the beginning of 2022 despite immense anxiety and find its not so bad. and then again for a different fandom a couple months later, and the response is such an immediate pickmeup & the writer friends ive made are so lovely that ive been trying my best ever since
28. who is the most delightful character youve ever written? why?
this is so hard. sobs. i like writing characters that have unique speech patterns, who like. make the narrative Sound different by being the pov character, which is something thats sometimes kind of hard about english-translated works (am i changing their cadence too much would they actually talk like that how much is my interpretation of the subs messing it up) so,,, i think for me i think the Most delightful characters that i always have the most fun writing are always characters like. avvy rasmr, who talks like a little fantasy spock, or anyone i can give talking quirks (like aye’s petnames). this is a copout u cant ever ask me my favorite anything i cant choose
39. what keeps you writing when you feel like giving up?
you see most of the time i am aware that i love writing its something thats good for me as a person and i feel better when i do it even if its hard and the process occasionally sucks and in that way it is similar to like. taking a stupid mental health walk. you know. so,,,, if i can (sometimes you really just cannot. it happens. its okay) i just…. like….. honestly the ‘i’m being so brave about it’ mindset is good for this. be annoyed & bitch & complain but u still gotta do it and look!!! you did!!!!!
also selective giving up is good for you. have several things to choose from so if something stalls you Can give up, just a little, and go elsewhere for a bit
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pumakaji64 · 1 year ago
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i suffer from this annoying problem you see-
i want to do more, i really think i do- but i just feel so confined by my current living situation where i am consantnly around my family- you see in 2020 my father mother and eldest sister had to move in with my older sister and i because of covid costing my parents their jobs- i wasn't exactly doing stellar before this but i was feeling like i was starting to get a handle on my life and starting to figure important things out- but since the move i feel like ive had to put that all on halt......
i stopped going to online therapy because i have no privacy to do so and feel safe because if i wanted to get any real progress id have to talk about my family and my childhood whici i do NOT want any of them hearing about and i cant go physically because i cant drive and i dont want to waste more gas and the time of the others- i stopped drawing because i have no privacy to safely express myself without their eyes unless if i lock myself in my room which they will judge me for and now my dominant hand is permanantly injured making it painful to draw unless im careful about it- i am confined downstairs in the living room most of the time because i need to watch my dog (this is on me though I can accept that) so i feel like i have no space for myself and when i take leisure time feel nothing but guilt everytime my family comes by- they love teasing me over the dog too saying i dont do enough i dont know how much theyre joking i already feel like shit all the time so i dont really appreciate the jabs- being on here is the one consistant thing i can muster up enough energy to do- but even so not without constant guilt- most days off dont feel like much of anything.
its hard even to engage in my interests anymore- dont have the time, dont have the energy, dont have the privacy, dont have the intelligence, dont have the confidence, idk... just been tough lately i guess.
not even my room offers much respite- my parents room is right across and they love to keep their door open- i feel them watching everytime i go in
i feel stuck
i feel like im wasting my life
i feel like i will never get out of here
i do not know what to do
i dont think theres even anything waiting for me even if i can
tw suicide talk
i cant go back to school because i have no idea what i want to do with my life- theres so much pressure for me to be succesful and each day i feel like more and more of a failure- and i know if i try and fail again i might end up trying to kill myself like i did last time
but to be honest i know i cant even kill myself because i know the cost of a funeral wont be worht it and because im too much of a coward to do so
but staying alive isnt much better when you feel like a constant financial drain and worthless layabout all the time
and everytime i think i find some sort of plan or some way out its like a carrot on a stick thats tugged away from me like a joke
it's so funny- i was openyl gushing about how hopeful i felt and now realitys crashing back down once again! there's no getting out of here.
to make it all worse this year has been terrible for me healthwise- im falling apart in so many ways and i feel even worse about being a waste of money-
i dont feel like i can talk to any of them about how awful i feel- most of the time any attempt to do so ends poorly and even when it doesnt nothing changes- i dont know where to make heads or tails of it all- i know im to blame for a lot of my own issues i know i overreact and take things too personally- i feel like i paint an unfair picture of them sometimes but eveyr day feels harder to keep on going- i already struggled with doing basic shit to take care of myself but recently it feels impossible
they did always say i just dont care enough- either its always been true or at some point became it.
i dont want to go to my stupid fucking job that bores the shit out of me- but i have to- i have to be of use somehow- i didnt sleep last night- i dont want to go to work because when im at work i just think about all the things i could be doing- actually useful or fufilling things i know i wont do on my day off despite how badly i wish i was while at my job
but i have to- it's almost time- so i guess i will.
whats the point of writing all of this- a cry for help maybe? pity seeking maybe even if i try to deny it over and over- i guess im just nearing my breaking point- something about these ast few months have been really grueling lately- again probably to do with all the suddent medical issues and the fact that my 20's are halfway done and i have nothing of worth to show for it- i dont know what to do i dont think im ever escaping this place and maybe thats for the best
I’m not a good person- I have all the same horrible traits they do. I just hide it on here to appear more likable.
im 25- its too late- ive wasted my entire life- it was always going to end this way everyone whose ever knwon me could see it thats why they all gave up on me- i did too. theres no point in prentending i can be fixed and wasting any more money. i feel like a ghost in this house watching life pass by. i feel like a stupid child trapped in an adults body.
i dont know what to do anymore-everything feels like sawdust.
But I’ll be fine… I’m numbing it all out. I don’t feel enough to want to hurt myself this time. like i said i have to go to work soon
im going to go downstairs and my mother will see my horribly messy hair and she'll make some annoyed comment about me needing to brush and ask me to run my fingers throught the tangles and we'll go to work. and i'll tell stupid jokes to try to make her smile because its the least i can do.
despite it all i love them still- but some days i wish i could love them from a safe distance.
im tempted to delete this like i do with all my breakdowns that i post on blogs that arent my vent blog but i think i'll keep this one up- because deep down i think i do want some advice or help or something- i cant keep living like this. i dont know what to do to stop. i just wish i had more to offer in return.
or maybe i just need to yell- whatever- doesnt matter- i'll go back to my usual postings on both of my active blogs regardless of whatever happens after this post-im sure i'll regret it later and try to just ingore this and hope you all too but it's like 4 am so whose even gonna see this lol
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thisisegregiouuuus · 2 months ago
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guys...i am cooking up a STORM 😼 (but im getting stuck again </3)
so the other night i was laying in bed and bam i suddenly remembered a piece of writing i made aggggesss ago. literally i think i started it last year or smth. like everything else ive ever written, it was just an unfinished, long-lost short story that would never see the light of day, until i suddenly recalled it randomly! since that night (i think like 3 days ago or smth) thats all ive been focussing on, and for once, im actually so proud of my work and what ive written.
and get this, ive been working on it so consistently that ive actually gotten so close to finishing it. im literally THISSS CLOOSEEE!!! to finnishing it. well kind of, but im definitely almost done, and i wanna finish it so bad, but i thin the writers block is hitting me, and it always finds the worst moments to hit u. its so annoying. i will not be able to sleep and live properly until i for once finish what ive started, so if i dont find a way to get this stupid short story done any time soon, i will lose my mind. and its not that i dont have any ideas--i do, i pretty much know what i want to happen next, but yk sometimes when u have an idea but just dont knnow how to translate it from an idea in ur brain into words onto paper? yeah. thats whats going on w me rn. its the actual worst 😿
and rq, another problem is that sometimes i feel like im rewriting/reusing a lot of the same words and things....idk if that makes sense, but i feel like i run out of words and just get kind of repetitive. word hippo (a thesaurus) is literaelly my best friend but i still have trouble finding good words </3 i tihnk im just really picky or dont know if a word will sound right in the sentence?? idk if that makes sense
im supposed to be working on the little scenario/short story/piece of writing, whatever u wanna call it rn, before i go to sleep, but im still kind of just drawing a blank and its the worst! im kinda feeling a little confident since im pretty happy with what ive came up with for this story, so i MIIIGHTTT post it on here, but to sumarise it, its basically a confession scene between my oc and her love interest. theyre super cute, like for once i came up with a really sweet and healthy ship/couple/whatever :3 (it sucks tho bc theyre kind of doomed by the narrative, they only get to be bf/gf for one month before my oc needs to move away to a new town and ditch her bf >:3) so yeah i love them! and so help me god if i dont get this finished i will lose it
wish me luck >:(
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corpsoir · 2 years ago
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hello! so I don’t really know how to word this in a non word vomit kind of way so my apologies ahead of time! One of my further questions about art especially digital art is finding a nice in between style of realism & “cartoony.” I personally struggle with the realism kind of art somethin about drawing real people is extremely difficult for me, I don’t want to draw them like fully real like but I do think my art could improve if I figured it out. Do you have any tips or recommendations to help with finding this? My other question is a bit more into coloring, i think I’m getting a little better at it but I’m still a tad confused on things like shading how to do lighting all that extra stuff people add when it’s not just flat color. Hopefully I make sense? I’ve been watching videos on digital painting & it’s helping but sometimes the ones I watch kinda go over my head & I was wondering you had any other tips/tricks or could dumb it down for me. Please & thank you sm again I really appreciate your help 💘
yeah sure i have lots of tips and thoughts im sure other people might find useful or fun to read as well!
i just wanna preface this by saying this is how just i do things and by no means am i saying im doing it "right" or that there even is a right way to do art. have fun! art is just a by-product of being human, nobody can do art more correctly or better than anyone else, its just art, its like breathing!
the best tip i can give to anyone looking to improve their art, especially when it comes to drawing people and light and shade, is taking a real life figure drawing class!
i know it can be expensive depending on where you live etc but if you ever get the opportunity, DO IT! its seriously so valuable especially if you have a teacher who is good at explaining 1) how to think when youre drawing and 2) can point you in the right direction and give you tips personally according to your abilities
when it comes to balancing realism and a more stylised cartoony style the best thing here is also to learn how the real human body works and looks. and again a figure drawing class can help here but so does looking at pictures, looking at your own body and how it moves and how light plays on your skin etc! i think in order to stylise something its always helpful to have that background knowledge of how something looks like in real life, that way you can sort of abstract the thing youre drawing and simplify it with simple shapes. i think one of my favourite examples for this that a lot of people struggle with is hands. people tend to want to draw every single finger in detail, and sometimes that can look a little bit stiff. heres a bunch of hands ive scribbled lately, notice how theyre all just. idk. shapes? especially the little negative spaces that trick you into seeing a finger when in reality its just a blob with a hole through it.
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you read them as hands but theyre really just. blobs mostly.
there are tons of books on anatomy for artists as well and those might help! i dont have any tips there though, most of my knowledge on the human form is from figure drawing and looking at my own body and stuff :))
and COLOURS! so i always work with a limited palette for my art. instead of going in and picking new colours all the time and ending up with an inconsistent muddy mess like i used to, i have made a nice palette with colours i enjoy and that go together well.
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lots of reds and browns and purples here, but thats just my personal preference for how i work with colours lol
and im gonna be really annoying with this but when it comes to shading things "right" this is something you gotta practice practice and practice, by looking at real world examples and trying to replicate it on paper (or digitally i guess). i still have a lot to learn, i struggle with light and shade still too and its fine, its a learning process!
but anyways this is how i usually do the light in my art, and i think this piece is the best example because its a very bright light source and stuff
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excuse my handwriting lol my thinking when it comes to light is just. im trying to think about what im drawing as a 3d object, so in my head i try to visualise for example how the light will fall on their weird hair shapes and their skin and clothes.
oh and also i just found a compilation of a bunch of videos by an artist who is really good at explaining a lot of stuff i do too! its REALLY long but she's got so many good tips on how to think about art and its really helped me a lot since i stumbled upon them. shes also really great at explaining colour theory in a way that made it so much easier for me!
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hope this helps at least a little bit lol im not a good teacher sorry!!
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gobstoppr · 2 years ago
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hey gamers so i was listening to this song (midnight moonlight, remix of triple deluxe final boss themes) and had some ideas for a comic / fic? about kirby and dedede going to visit taranza .
heres my disorganized rambles from the notes app .
== taranza visit ==
-id like to think that like. every few months kirby and ddd go to visit taranza . -its that time of the month again . look kirbys got his mess of a calender right here . its got a silly flower doodle on the date -wake up wake up wake up we gotta go cmon wake up -ddd is barely awake . hes annoyed . huh . what . what is it why are u bothering me at 7 in the morning -kirby enthusiasitically pointing at the dreamstalk out the window . sigh . oh boy time to fucking climb huh -no matter how sleep deprived and grumpy you are , u cant let down a promise to kirby . hell drag u along regardless . -bandee's also coming . yeah -ok so now were starting the climb up the dreamstalk . kirbys flying a bit ahead. hes using beetle because better flight . ddd's behind em carrying a bunch of stuff for a picnic later . hes like climbing climbing . strong . bandee is helping -hey are you sure ur alright carrying all that . well yeah ofcourse im fine lol. im the strongest guy ever ive got this . <-- is exhausted -kirby enthusiastically greeting everyone they pass . oh hey its one of floralias funny flower fairy guys . hi ! hi there !! how are u !! hes like an energetic puppy . he sees literally anyone and is overjoyed . -maybe the people of the sky still hold ddd extremely highly right . like yeah were well aware it was initially a misunderstanding that u were the hero of dreamland but ur still our hero . they personally helped/watched ddd when he was doing that section with the cannon,, and probably witnessed him helping to free kirby so he could finish the final blow on sectonia . -but yea i think it would be entertaining if hes like . a super big deal to them . tries to act all cool like yea i know im the best haha . he is a selfconscious mess and this is how he disguises being flattered -ok so eventually we meet up with taranza all the way up near the castle in royal road . -taranzas happy to see them . hes constantly trying to tidy up in little ways like fixing his hair and straightening out his scarf and such . even tho hes sorta close with them hes a bit of a perfectionist and wants to be seen as well put together . -we do silly fun things . have a picnic in the garden . taranza teaching the others about plants . bandee is fascinated by his rambles . in the past taranzas been shown to think of himself as very cool and clever sometimes so maybe . he plays chess with ddd some . you know snickering to himself when he thinks hes about to make a really smart move. ddd playfully teases him over it -maybe at one point taranza gets a bit gloomy . maybe hes staring longingly at a dreamstalk blossom and feelin sad over sectonia again . ddd could try to reassure him a lil . give em a pat on the back -kirby suddenly remembers somethin . runs over to his bag and pulls out some flowers local in dreamland that he had brought for taranza bc he knows he likes that sorta thing . taranza cheers up a lil bit . somethin somethin thematic about learning to cope and move on some . accepting the love of the people around you now while still retaining part of their memory . -they hang out until sunset . idk maybe they spend the night or somethin its a long way back
thats all ive got for now yea
i might try to draw a few of these ideas later . just . thinkin about the guys ykno im replaying triple deluxe again and MAN. that game. is so fucking good .
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twodimecastle · 3 years ago
Text
fifty bucks & six months.
spencer reid x gender neutral reader new relationship, secret keeping nonsense, 4.5k words, ao3 a/n; turns out i love writing texting fic but tumblr destroys the formatting rip
zero months.
You smile conspiratorially, extending a pinkie towards Spencer and he gives you a skeptical look.
“You know the odds of being found out immediately are-” he starts, but you cut him off.
“Astronomical, I know. I know. But don’t you think it’ll be fun to see how long we can push it?” you wheedle, not caring that your voice sounds more like begging than is strictly dignified because seeing the way Spencer’s nose crinkles in amusement at your heavy handed persuasion is too adorable to pass up. You scoot closer on the couch, tapping the end of his nose with your pinkie finger, letting him catch your hand between his as you continue “I think we’ve got a good shot at hiding it for a little while. It would be like a game.”
Spencer draws your captive hand to his lips, brushing them across your knuckles and watching fondly as you forge ahead in your campaign to persuade him, enjoying the show and the attention too much to tell you he’s already on board. Your eyes are shining with the prospect of the caper, and you’ve made no move to take your hand back from him, and Spencer’s pretty sure he’d be more than happy to sit with you in this moment forever. “I mean-” you go on, gesturing animatedly with your free hand, “you’re like-a really good liar when you want to be. And everyone else always forgets how good you are at it.”
He snorts at that and the sound makes you light up, eyes tracking the arch of his brows, the warmth in his soft brown eyes, memorising the way he looks like this; utterly unbothered, completely at ease. It might be your favourite version of him, but that race has always been a tight one with no clear winner in sight. You have lots of favourite versions of Spencer. Twisting your hand in his, you tangle your fingers together, savouring the way you feel his thumb glide delicately along your skin and the unhidden joy in his face at the simple show of affection.
Time to play your trump card.
“$50 says we can hide it from the whole group for at least six months. If everyone figures it out before then, you win. But if not everyone has worked it out by then, I win.”
The mischievous shine in your eyes is irresistible, and Spencer smiles, disentangling one of his hands from yours to extend his own pinky finger.
“You’re on.”
The words barely make it out of his mouth before you’re colliding with him, pressing your lips to his.
two months.
“So, how long has this whole thing been going on?” Derek’s question catches Spencer off guard, and, based on the way he can see you freeze in his peripheral vision, takes you by surprise as well. Sliding into the driver's seat of the SUV, Derek continues “I hope you didn’t think you were gonna be able to keep me in the dark for long, pretty boy. You should know better than that.”
Following mechanically after him, Spencer takes the passenger seat, trying to frame his next statement as carefully as possible as he hears your door close and the car start. “We were-going to tell you guys-” he begins uncomfortably, glancing back to you for support, but you look just as on edge as he feels. “We were just gonna-keep it to ourselves for a while-before telling Hotch and everything-” he tries again, the mounting tension levering his shoulders higher and higher with every passing moment, but then Derek just laughs, shaking his head.
“Hey, I’m happy for you, kid. For both of you.” He spares a look at you in the back seat through the rear view mirror, and you can feel the tension in your jaw relax, the furrows in your brow straightening out at the note of approval in Derek’s voice. “I’m glad you two finally figured it out,” he says, fondly, and you laugh.
“I bet Spence we could keep it from you guys at least six months,” you explain, reaching forwards through the centre console to link your pinky with Spencer’s, and the touch of your hand releases the last of the tension he had been harbouring as he covers your hand with the other one of his own. He knows Derek clocks the motion, filing it away in his mind somewhere, but he doesn’t care about the scrutiny so much right now. Not when your hand is so warm and comfortable in his.
Derek reaches for the dial on the radio and flicks through the channel, thinking about something, and as you watch, a slow mischievous smirk spreads across his face a moment later before he glances first at Spencer and then at you.
“I’ll tell you what,” he says to you, and Spencer can feel a familiar grin tugging at his own lips as he watches a plan take shape in his friend’s eyes. “I’m happy to sit on this information for a while for a cut of the winnings from whichever one of you comes out on top.” He snorts good naturedly as he continues “I have my own bet to win with Prentiss, so if you two help me win that one, I’ll cut you in too.”
“A quid pro quo of sorts,” Spencer says slowly, and he feels your fingers tighten around his, as you snort softly, and he knows instinctually you’re grinning the same way you always do when you’re winning a game. “I think we can do that.”
Derek grins, turning the music up as he nods, eyes on the road. “Then you two love birds have got yourselves a deal.”
two months and two weeks.
PG: youre not as slick as you think you are ;)
YN: ???
PG: ;))))))))) you should invest in some concealer for your work bag sweetness or tell the good doctor to pay more attention to whats visible in your work clothes
YN: oh my fucking god wait how do you even know thats how that happened
PG: im all knowing and all seeing im like the omnipotent goddess of the fbi
YN: derek blabbed
PG: he sang like a canary but also im an omnipotent goddess im also totally clued in on the whole bet situation with em so for the low low price of every single juicy detail about how this adorableness went down you can buy my silence :)
YN: im getting derek decaf coffee on all coffee runs from now on >:( traitors dont get caffeine
PG: darling sweet angel i need deets all of them like immediately
YN: >:( fine ok so. after that case down in georgia a few months ago? the weird one? with the creepy mother son thing?
PG: omg yuck pls dont remind me im here for the CUTENESS not the MURDER
YN: sorryyyyyyy anyway so spence was like being super weird about it all on the plane and whatever but he was doing that super annoying thing where he ignores it and says hes fine so everyone leaves him alone
PG: YEAH why does everyone here do that ALL THE TIME its SO annoyingggg
YN: ikr its insufferable and like super not subtle ANYWAY. spence was being weird and whatever and i just. refused to let him sulk on his own or whatever like i could tell there was something bothering him and so after work i insisted that we were gonna get like shitty diner food or whatever and watch a movie and he knows better than to say no to me
PG: smart boy
YN: so we got fries and milkshakes and then went back to his place to watch a movie and he was still like weird and silent and like brooding yknow? but whatever just figured hed talk about it when he was ready so i put on a movie and offered to make popcorn and then he was just staring at me and he looked so SAD and TIRED and i thought id done something wrong like the poor guy looked like he was gonna cry and i was panicking over fucking popcorn and then he says ‘why are you always so nice to me?’
PG: oh my god hes like if a sad victorian orphan was actually a triplicate phd holder
YN: i was SO thrown off i was like spencer. spencer were best friends. ive been forcing you to hang out with me for years now why do you THINK im being nice to you its bc i care about you asshole and then. like after another million years after letting me sweat it out over whether hes about to cry for like fucking years the asshole grabs my hand and says. i shit you not. ‘you know im in love with you, right?’ !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
PG: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
YN: anyway hes my boyfriend now :’) dont tell anyone tho gotta win the bet
four months.
Lingering by the elevator, you glance around at the uncharacteristically silent office building, waiting for Spencer to leave the bullpen. The sound of his footfalls drawing nearer makes you smile and you mentally applaud yourself for suggesting the two of you remained behind after disembarking from the plane, taking advantage of the manufactured privacy to take the same car home, back to his apartment.
When he sees you waiting for him, he can’t help the soft fond smile that tugs at his face, as he reaches for your hand, sliding his fingers into yours with a gentle squeeze, the quiet of the building allowing him to indulge in the show of affection. You return the squeeze, leaning your head on his shoulder with a yawn and as he presses a fond kiss to your temple he’s rewarded by a sleepy hum of approval from you that sends a rush of quiet joy shooting through him.
“At least we won’t be sleeping in hotel beds again tonight,” you say, voice weary, and Spencer nods as he shuffles you into the elevator. The doors slide shut and the elevator starts to move and in the moment of absolute privacy, you steal a kiss, tilting your chin up to catch his lips with yours, revelling in the soft huff of surprise he lets out, even as he smiles against your mouth. Even after months, the simple act of kissing Spencer still feels new and thrilling somehow, like you can’t quite believe it’s something you’re allowed to do.
His nose brushes yours and he breathes “unless something big comes up, we get a sleep in tomorrow too,” and the way you beam at him sends his heart racing in his chest, unable to look away from the fondness shining in your eyes.
As the two of you exit the elevator and make your way through the Bureau car park, you tuck yourself against his side, wedging yourself under his arm with a happy sigh, eager to get yourself horizontal and asleep as fast as possible. Spencer brushes his lips against your temple again as the two of you close in on his car, almost free and clear of the office when a voice behind the two of you brings you up short.
“Reid?”
Spencer is reacting before his mind catches up, turning on his heel towards the sound of Hotch’s voice echoing through the parking lot, conscious of the incriminating way you’re still tucked against his side, even as his brain is rifling frantically through any possible excuses for the current circumstances.
“Hotch-” you step away from Spencer, cheeks flaming, not wanting to chance a look at him. “I-we-thought everyone else had gone home,” you trail off lamely, trying your hardest not to balk under Hotch’s ominously impassive scrutiny. A second passes, then another, and the short silence feels like months, or years even as the three of you stand locked in a stalemate.
“I take it the two of you would prefer to keep this under wraps?” He asks, finally, and it registers with Spencer, somewhat belatedly, that Hotch’s tone isn’t admonishing. It isn’t enough to dissipate the tension coiling in Spencer’s muscles just yet, but he spares a glance at you as he nods, and a moment later, Hotch gives the two of you a curt nod of his own. “I’ll tell you what,” he says, a shade of irony colouring his voice. “If you two fill out the paperwork for in-team relationships for me, I’ll keep it to myself. I understand privacy is hard to come by in our office.”
The words take a while to fully sink in, and you’re conscious that you’re standing there blinking and gaping at your boss like a bemused fish for a good few seconds before you’ve composed yourself enough to say “absolutely, sir. Of course. Thank you.”
Hotch nods again, heading towards his own car, and as he passes the two of you, a brief smile flashes across his face.
“Congratulations, you two. Get some sleep.”
four months and three weeks.
Spencer isn’t sure how late it is, but he knows you’re not asleep yet, the faint glow of your phone screen casting faint distorted shadows across his room as your free hand rests lightly on his chest. In the dark blue twilight of his room, the space feels undefined and dream like somehow, the line between his mind and his surroundings blurry or indistinct somehow, and as you huff out a near silent laugh at something on the screen in your hand, a thought rises to the surface of his thoughts like flotsam on an unwanted tide.
The more clinical part of his mind notes the autonomic response in his body, the way his heart lurches unpleasantly in his chest, heart rate rising with an influx of cortisol through his nervous system, automatically rifling through ways to control the anxiety response. Age old instinct surges forwards, starting to push his spiralling anxiety down out of sight so as not to bother you with it, but then your hand shifts infinitesimally on his chest, fingers curling in the soft fabric of his pyjama shirt, and for once his body is miles ahead of his brilliant mind, your name is leaving his lips before he’s really aware of it happening.
Your gaze flashes up from your phone at the sound of his voice, soft and hesitant, and you let the screen go dark as you set it down. You can feel Spencer’s heart hammering against his ribs under your palm, and your brows knit together in concern as you shift closer to his side, tracing gentle circles over his shirt with your fingertips, the repetitive motion intended to soothe, though you’re not sure if it’s for his benefit or yours.
“Yeah, baby?” You ask softly, working hard to keep the rising worry from your voice. After three years of friendship and almost six months of dating, you know him well enough to sense when his propensity for overthinking and catastrophizing is slipping out of his control. You can feel his chest rise as he inhales sharply, whatever he’s about to say cut off by second guessing, doing nothing to pacify your concern. “Spence? Is everything okay?” You ask again.
“This-bet-hiding our relationship-it’s-” he trails off, throat tight as he rolls onto his side, facing away from you, and smushing his face into the pillow, already wishing he hadn’t said anything. You’re the kindest person he’s ever met, but offering up this kind of raw insecurity feels like pulling teeth. Even if it’s you. Especially if it’s you. He doesn’t know if he’s ready to find out if you care about him enough to stay when his racing mind gets the better of him. The pillow muffles his voice as he says “never mind.”
You feel your own heart rate tic up in response to that, matching the wild beat of Spencer’s that you could feel under your palm only a second ago. “Baby, talk to me. What’s on your mind?”
He shakes his head, face still hidden in the pillow. “It’s stupid.”
He can feel the rush of your breath on his back as you sigh, and your voice is almost achingly patient as you say softly “it’s not stupid if it matters to you.” There’s a long pause, and you press yourself against his back, settling close and letting your hand slide over his side to rest on his chest, the heat of his skin sinking into yours even through his thin shirt. In spite of his height, he feels so small as you wrap yourself around him, drawing closer, trying to reassure him without yet knowing what he needs to be reassured of. “Spence?”
“Are you ashamed of-being with me? Is that why you want to hide it?” The words are almost whispered, the sound almost lost against his pillow and your heart sinks, plummeting faster and further than if you’d dropped it off the side of a skyscraper. You should’ve known he might worry about that, should have realised it might have felt that way. Remorse rises hot and bitter in your throat and you swallow it down, trying to steady your voice.
“Spencer. Sweetheart. No. Never. I could never be ashamed. I love you. I’m so sorry.” Your arms wrap more tightly around him and you bury your face against the crook of his neck, the tension you can feel in every inch of his body making you feel more cruel and short-sighted than you already do. “I’m sorry I didn’t realise it might feel like that. I could never be ashamed of being with you, Spence. You’re my favourite person.” He takes the kind of shaky, shallow breath that comes with trying not to cry and your heart breaks a little more as one of his hands slowly moves to cover yours where it rests against his chest, just over his heart.
As his hand rests over yours, his thumb strokes lightly along your knuckles, and he knows you know him well enough to notice the way his hand trembles, just a little, because then your hand is shifting against his, turning to clumsily tangle your fingers with his, holding tighter to him as he tries to collect himself, drawing in a deep, shuddering breath as his eyes squeeze shut. He can hear the contrition in your voice as you say softly “I’ve never really liked having people know everything about what’s going on in my life. And I love our friends but-something like this, that’s so-special? So new? I wanted to be able to keep it to just us for a while.”
“I’m sorry.” His voice comes out a little shaky, scarcely more than a whisper, and it’s more than you can take as you pull back and gently force him to roll over to face you. He’s not crying, but his eyes are glassy and you recognise the fight to keep the tears unshed in the tight set of his jaw and the hard line of his lips. Leaning on your elbow, you lift your free hand to gently smooth out the furrows of his brow, letting your fingers linger along the planes of his face.
“Why are you sorry,” you ask gently. “You don’t need to be sorry, baby. Not for talking to me about things that bother you. We can tell everyone else tomorrow, if you want? We can call off the bet. Derek will live. If he’s got a problem with it I’ll turn all his shirts into crop tops.”
He can tell the joke is a last bid attempt to make him smile, to ease his fear, and it works. In spite of the anxious weight in his chest that feels like it’s pressing him into the mattress, Spencer laughs weakly, meeting your eyes, and he watches as a relieved smile breaks across your face, releasing your lower lip from where you’d trapped it worriedly between your teeth. The unmitigated affection that floods into your eyes renders him momentarily breathless as he takes in the moment. You’re still here, still trying to take care of him. Just as kind and steadfast as ever.
“No,” he says eventually, wrapping his arms around you, pulling you down on top of him like a living weighted blanket, letting your warmth chase the bulk of the tension from his body and luxuriating in the way you curl into him, one hand sliding into his hair. “We shouldn’t call off the bet. We still have to take Emily’s money, remember?”
Your sleepy laugh is the last thing he hears before his eyes close and the feel of your body wound around his lulls him to sleep.
five months.
SR: Can I talk to you about something?
DM: you dying or something? that’s a really fuckin ominous text to recieve out of the blue
SR: I’m not dying, why would that be what you assumed? I just have a question.
DM: just a figure of speech but what’s up?
SR: It’s about your bet with Emily. What’re the terms for it?
DM: wym?
SR: What exactly did you two make the bet about? What needs to happen in order for you to win the bet?
DM: does this count as collusion?
SR: Technically yes, but calling it collusion implies a certain degree of illegality.
DM: whatever anyway the terms i made with em were that you’d make some kind of move before your birthday but she reckoned you were gonna need some kind of near death experience to do anything about your crush why?
SR: I’m just making sure I have all the information.
DM: what’s going on pretty boy? you planning something?
SR: Maybe.
DM: not a helpful answer reid is everything good?
SR: Everything’s fine. We’re just figuring some stuff out. Nothing to worry about.
DM: is there something you’re not telling me?
SR: Don’t worry about it.
five months, three weeks and six days.
In the chaos that was the scramble from the briefing room to the jet, you haven’t yet had the chance to speak to Spencer about the outcome of his most recent thesis defence panel. By the time you’ve got a moment to breathe, the jet is underway, coasting across the country towards Montana, the whole team settled in for the six hour flight. You corner him in the tiny kitchen area of the jet as he’s making a mug of mediocre coffee, fingers tapping out an absent minded rhythm on the countertop as the coffee machine whirs, clearly not paying attention to anything outside of his head.
“Hey, boy genius.” He jumps, whirling around, eyes wide with surprise, and you smile fondly. “So?” You demand, and Spencer raises an eyebrow in confusion. You snort, rolling your eyes as you elaborate. “Your defence panel. Did it go okay?”
You’re shifting your weight and fidgeting restlessly with the belt loops on your pants and as he studies you for a moment, it occurs to Spencer that you’re nervous for him over this outcome. The thought brings an almost giddy smile to his face.
“You know this isn’t my first thesis defence panel, right?” He says mildly, deliberately burying the lede, enjoying the way you scowl in irritation too much to answer your question right away, too enamoured with this display of concern on his behalf.
“Don’t be difficult, Doctor Reid. It’s still a big deal.” He just shrugs noncommittally, and you huff, swatting his arm lightly. “So did it go well?” You ask again, eyes narrowing as you try to dissect his microexpressions, trying to discern the answer he seems determined to keep from you for yourself. A few seconds later, he relents.
“I can now add degree number six to my wall.” He confirms. Getting degrees doesn’t hold the same rush of pride for him now, the accomplishment feeling somewhat less exceptional as he acquires more of them, but the way your face lights up with pride for him reminds him how special the things he’s capable of can be. You’ve always made him feel like more than the sum of his parts somehow, like something infinitely more precious than he always assumed he is.
“I fucking knew it. That’s amazing, Spence,” you say, chest warm and full with pride and love, and his almost shy smile in return is enough to make a decision for you in a split second. Your hand dips into your back pocket, drawing something out, and you carefully hide it from view in your palm as Spencer tracks the motion curiously with his eyes.
Your eyes are shining with affection and something that looks like mischief and the way you’re smiling at him is more than enough to divert his attention as you step closer, just barely noticing as you slip something into his hand. You’re dangerously, distractingly close now, and he’s conscious, if somewhat distantly, that neither of you is concealed from the rest of the team, scant meters away in the seating area of the jet. But you’re smiling and close enough for him to feel your breath on his face and suddenly your lips are on his, and even after nearly seven months of being able to touch you like this, it’s enough to make him forget everything else as he melts into the contact, savouring the warmth of your skin and the faint smell of your shampoo.
You pull back a second later, the kiss over almost as soon as it started, but it’s enough to attract attention, and you can hear a belated ‘oh SHIT’ from Emily in the main cabin of the jet. In your peripheral vision, you can see money changing hands, your friends scrambling to react, but you don’t look at them, choosing to enjoy the bemused, affectionate look on Spencer’s face as his brain catches up to the events unfolding around the two of you.
“I was tired of keeping it a secret,” you say fondly, loud enough only for him to hear. “You win.”
Blinking in confusion, he finally tears his gaze away from yours, fingers uncurling to reveal the fifty dollar bill you had pressed into his palm right before you kissed him. The penny drops and he snorts with laughter, shaking his head in half hearted indignation as his other arm loops around you, pulling you in, letting you rest your head on his shoulder, hiding your face from the rest of the team as he kisses your temple, revelling in the way you wind yourself around him in response.
“I was gonna do this in like two days. I wanted you to win,” he murmurs against your hairline, and he can feel your faint laughter.
“Too bad, baby. I’m used to getting my way,” you say, pulling back to steal another quick kiss before peeling yourself out of his arms with a wink, turning to face the onslaught of ‘care to fucking explain that’ and ‘I fucking told you so’ from the rest of your friends, tugging him with you by your joined hands.
277 notes · View notes
commonrur · 2 years ago
Note
I don’t get it, what’s going on between you and @pettywithanr ?
A lot. Wanna rlly understand where he is coming from but he is just contradicting and aggressive towards us.
PART 1
It all started when Geo left the server he created, he told us that he isn't in the fandom anymore and trying to move on from it. Were like ok have fun with ur new fandom (although we were very confused cuz he still post jamilton/hamilton content but think nothing of it)
Until one day out of the blue i found out im blocked including some of us in the server. I was confused and shocked at first cuz why would u do that? Did i do something wrong? (theres a lot of that in this relationship and if u think its tiring trust me its worse)
I only got an "explanation" from a mutual friend of ours that he did this to cut ties and properly move on, so I connected to him in Instagram (cuz he haven't block me there) and ask for an explanation which was again along the lines "they wanna move on and do different things" i was like ok (even though its a douche move of him to just drop me without explaining it directly to me) I said my last goodbye and that was that. Well so i have though cuz he keeps messaging me still everyday even go as far creating a gc with me in it, which was weird considering he wanted to move on but think nothing of it.
Until allie spoke out about how geo was an awful person to him. And well i thought Geo was only saying mean shit behind their backs ig he also do it right in front of their faces.
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Its mostly in Filipino but its basically Geo saying how allie was annoying him just because allie disagreed with him and instead of talking to Allie (which i was urging him to do but refuses cuz he said and i quote "Dont u want that theres drama?" "Ur making everyone tense" "good") about it he made a comment for the entire server to see and it made us all uncomfortable.
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Sooner or later a lot of people are speaking about the stuff Geo has done and said to them ( a lot of backstabbing, trash talking all because we have disagreed with something he says)
Example me saying "Oh i hc Thomas wearing dresses but thats ok too" he got so mad about that comment and put me on time out and forced me to apologize and blocked me
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And so we all agreed that he was a bad person after all the things he put us through. We had a DC game night we had sm fun and we played gartic and well...
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And apparantly he have spies in the server and saw that which he posted to his story
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Naturally yes its mean I ADMIT but after all he put me through idc. Our friend Beat saw this and told him off (apparantly beat knew about all the backstabbing bullying and sided with us)
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I mean all i did was draw a trashcan and made an arrow ur name but ig that's equivalent of me kms
This shows Geo actually admitting to all the times he made someone uncomfy ("ive been the mastermind in every single fucking drama we make")
Then it all spiraled after that. He send invites to his friends to attack us and victims blame us, invalidating all our horrible experiences with Geo. He sent spies to make himself look like the victim (actually funny thing his username was "victim" in the next story)
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moonlit-imagines · 4 years ago
Text
Headcanons for being Peter Parker’s Younger Sibling
Peter Parker x sibling!reader
warnings: bullying mention, blood mention
a/n: a fuckin reach, its been a WHILE since ive seen tasm
prompt: y/n is peter’s sibling
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peter and you were playful kids
you were just a year and some months younger than him, so you had a harder time remembering your parents than him
but he always told you stories about them that made you miss them a little more
peter was a genius, we all know it
he was the one helping you with your homework most nights
“peter i cant do it!”
“that’s okay, y/n. look, start with two times four, that’s eight, then four times six, twenty-four, right?”
“can i say a cuss word?”
“sure”
“math is shit”
you would cry during homework a lot
you’d also pass out on his floor after talking for hours
and you’d either wake up facedown on the floor or in your room since uncle ben would pick you up and put you to bed
peter took it upon himself to take you back to your room, but he usually dragged you by the arm, sooooo
you’d play action figures together
he was batman, you were robin always
“can i be batman?”
“oldest gets to be batman so im batman”
“but i wanna be batman!”
peter walked you to your school before taking off on his skateboard
and he’d pick you up on his way home
on half-days your brother taught you how to skate
you fell a lot
aunt may had to patch you up
“how many times do i have to tell you those skateboards are dangerous?!”
peter got you your own skateboard so that you could practice without him
you would text him after you did a trick and he’d always say hell yes! show me when i get home!
being his photography assistant
really you were his assistant constantly
science fair was the most boring day of the year
“y/n, stand right here, i need to get something from my locker”
*judges walk up while youre left unattended and in a state of PANIC*
you were bullied in middle school, same as peter, he’d always stick up for you and get beat up instead
it made you very mad but it was scary, too
“how’d you get into this fight, peter?”
“oh, you know, just happened”
“peter was sticking up for me, uncle ben”
“was he now? you’re a good brother, peter”
lonely when he moved onto high school :/
but you got there soon enough
you guys were kind of loners, just ate lunch together, lugged around your skateboards, you were an artist, he was a photographer
just spectating the chaos of high school, rolling your eyes at the drama
“i have two bucks, do you want anything from the vending machine?”
“uhh, a coke?”
you saw peter get bullied by flash and lost your shitttt
you actually started a food fight after throwing mashed potatoes in his eyes
“what the hell, parker?!”
“sit down and eat your goddamn food, flash, or next time it wont be potatoes”
peter was half-proud, half-embarrassed
trying to see how long you could skate through the halls before any authority figures stopped you
sometimes......you guys got sent to the office together :)
*phone ringing* “hello, is this ben parker?”
“which one of them is it this time?”
the principal’s office was a trip sometimes
you and peter exchange your glances and wait to get scolded
“ah, the parkers, come in, lets have a chat...why do you two always feel the need to get in trouble together?”
“we just happen to get along really well for siblings”
no you fuckin dont lmaoooo
it was always something with you two
like always
*banging on peter’s door* “I KNOW YOU HAVE MY BROWNIES, PETER, GIVE THEM BACK”
*peter through a mouthful of brownies* “I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOURE TALKING ABOUT, YOURE CRAZY”
“is that my jacket?” -peter
“you mean my jacket?”
“y/n, i swear to god if you steal any more of my clothes it’s over for you”
“well, aunt may keeps giving me your clothes, so take it up with her”
and then there was just the little annoying things
“peter, can you stop clicking your pen?”
*clicks pen faster*
“you’re the worst”
and my personal favorite
“peter, open the door”
“why?”
“emergency”
*opens bedroom door* “what?”
“aunt may is making meatloaf”
“shit, uh...get your board, we’ll skate to mcdonalds and tell her we already ate”
peter and you RARELY ever brought your parents up until he found your dad’s briefcase, you didn’t have much to say
soon he was flooding his room with conspiracies and pulling you in to explain them
he began acting REALLY weird, but he was pretty open with you, he told you he went to oscorp
“YOU SNUCK IN??”
“your standards for me are way too high, y/n”
soon you started to feel not-so-good and weird things started to happen
“peter??”
“yeah? whats up?”
“this is gonna sound really weird...my hand is stuck to the door”
“it happened to you, too??”
“happening, pete. wait—this happened to you?? what is this???????”
yall done fucked up and got bit by spiders peter had so carelessly brought back into the house
it was an adjustment to say the least
and this adjustment got a whole lot harder that one night...you can remember peter just...so upset
you tried to chase him out to make sure he was okay, but uncle ben told you to stay with your aunt
maybe if you’d have been there...it would’ve been different, but when the cops got to your house you were at a loss for words
peter was covered in his blood still
“hey, hey, just breathe, okay? it’s not your fault, peter. just hop in the shower, yeah? i’ll take care of your clothes”
when peter took your advice and you were left alone, you just cried, you cried until he finally found you curled up in a ball in your room
then he cried, you just hugged each other sobbing your eyes out
peter got distant for a while, which was rough since the two of your were mourning for your uncle and dealing with these newfound powers
sooner or later he came around and helped you out, designing webshooters and a suit for you
“we match?”
*sigh* “yeah...yeah, we match”
ah yes, spider-team
you really tripped out new york at first, they thought spider-man was a teleporter
peter was still talking about your dad, but you really didn’t care, uncle ben was always going to be who raised you
you and peter would be covered in bruises after going out
“uh—peter punched me”
“y/n???!!!”
“I PANICKED”
just being dumb scared teens that cant function to save their lives until they get a little bit lucky
seriously like, every big villain you guys fought was just the worst
peter didn’t help all the time, he was good at provoking them sometimes
“hey, spider-man, you mind shutting up for a minute? for my sake?”
“sorry, sorry, just couldn’t help myself!”
he gushed to you about gwen stacy, he actually dragged you to her apartment to be patched up by her SEVERAL TIMES
yadda yadda yadda peter graduated high school! how cool is that? but he was late (what a surprise) even though you put off spidering today just for this
but he made it and you clapped the loudest for him
“thats my brotherrrr!!!”
cute family picture! (aunt may printed a bunch of them and gave them to you two and peter pinned them to his wall)
you and peter actually have a lot of pictures of the two of you just goofing off
he has one of you stuck in a trash can that cracks him up every time
seeing harry osborn again after YEARS
“wow, y/n, last time i saw you i just thought you were peter’s annoying little sibling”
“aww, it’s good to see you, too”
electrooooo
this guy really worried you bc like, bzzzz shock
you and peter weren’t equipped for that
it took a while, but you were finally able to deal with that
and several other problems
including peter’s breakup, which was a whole ordeal of its own
*peter laying upside down on your bed* “i dont know, y/n, you know? i wanna be with her so bad, i love her...but her dad is haunting me”
*you, drawing on your notepad with your legs propped up on his* “yeah, makes sense”
you actually had to tap out during the end of electro, you were hurt pretty bad
“y/n, hey? yeah, you’re okay. stay here, just stay right there, i’m gonna be back for you”
*thumbs up to show youre still alive*
but when peter came back for you there was bad news, he’d lost gwen
he ripped his mask off and fell to his knees, you could barely move but you powered through it, giving him a hug while he cried
“we...we better get home before aunt may starts to worry”
she was at work, so you two had the place to yourselves to clean up and mourn before the official news was revealed
“i should have listened to her dad, y/n, this is all my fault”
he was a mess, you couldn’t bare seeing him like this. it’s been so long since you’d seen him like this
the funeral was rough, peter was grasping onto your shoulder the whole time
he insisted that he was going to stick behind and stay with gwen for a while
“okay, i’ll see you at home...love you”
“love you too”
you gave him a hug and left him to his business, the next few months you were the only spider-person operating in new york...until rhino popped up
“im coming with you”
“you’re sure?”
“yeah, im sure”
(these are kinda ass but anyways im tagging my marvel ppl even tho ik this isnt mcu so just ignore this post if you dont care, sorry!!)
taglist: @alwaysananglophile // @rorybutnotgilmore // @locke-writes // @sweetheartliz07 // @queen-destenie // @natasha-danvers // @allthecreativeonesaretaken // @frostedgiant // @praellee // @emygirl // @lotsoffandomrecs //
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gidleboo · 5 years ago
Note
hi! can i request (G)I-dle’s reaction to fem SO putting their hand on their thigh to tease them thanks! also hope you’re doing well and drinking water!!
GIDLE Reacts
a headcanon showing how each member may react to their female s/o teasing them in the waiting room.
requested by: anon
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
You stifled a yawn as you stretched your arms, your back arching in the process. The time read 1:12 pm on your phone before you lazily plopped it back down onto your lap, glancing over to your girlfriend who sat next to you as she was focused on her phone.
She and the other members were currently on break after recording their group scene for their new MV, "Oh my God" and the two of you decided to spend some alone time with each other as you sat in the furthest couch, away from the others.
You shuffled in your seat, turning to face your girlfriend as you stared at her lovingly, wondering how breathtaking a person could get while you leaned onto your palm with your elbow propped up on the back part of the couch.
You watched her scroll through her phone lazily while she sat comfortably with one of her legs placed on top of your thighs, occasionally giggling at whatever she saw on her phone.
You smiled softly at her and let your gaze drop from her face as your eyes started traveling down her body, suddenly feeling your face heat up from embarrassment as you shamelessly checked her out. You couldn't help it though, your eyes were moving on their own.
Your eyes found their way down to her flawless legs and you felt yourself bite the inside of your cheeks. 'Damn,' you thought to yourself as you unconsciously placed your hand onto her bare thigh.
You suddenly thought of a naughty little plan as you grabbed the blanket that you remembered sitting on and covered both of your legs, slightly surprised that your girlfriend hasn't paid any attention to what you were doing as she was so engrossed with her phone.
You let your hand make their way underneath the blanket as you stared at your girlfriend, waiting for some sort of reaction as you let your hand place themself back on top of her thigh. When you stil receive no reaction from her, you let your hand caress the skin, squeezing the soft flesh.
SOYEON
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first off, this smol bean has been paying attention to everything you were doing
her attention was split in half; for you and for her phone
anyway, she was completely taken aback from the unexpected action
she literally thought you were just covering both of your legs with the blanket
soyeon's eyes widened as she immediately turned her head to face you with a questioning look
you gave her a smirk as your hand started moving upwards, reaching for the hem of her shorts
soyeon was quick to stop your hand before nervously glancing over to the other members and staff in the next room
seeing that no one was paying attention to you both, she sighed and shot you a warning look; 'We can't'
no joke, that dominant gaze she gave you brought a shiver down your spine
you bit your lip and immediately pulled your hand out from under the blanket as you slump in your seat, pouting at your failed attempt
so in conclusion: soyeon would be stopping you from going any further almost immediately, leaving you no choice but to follow her
MIYEON
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completely oblivious at first
mistook your teasing as a sign of comfort; lol cute
but that was all until your hand started traveling upwards
would be flustered af
her face immediately heats up as she tightens her hold on her phone, your fingernails drawing patterns on her inner thigh
decides to not question what the hell you were doing as she lets out a soft whimper once your hand drew closer to her heat
she bites onto her bottom lip, trying hard to not let out any more sounds but fails as your hand slides over her clothed center
"y/n stop, we can't," miyeon breathes out, her face now turned completely red
clearly her body doesn't want you to stop, so you continue to tease her as she starts to breathe heavily
after a few more minutes, the two of you flinched when you both hear her manager clap their hands from the other room, "guys, time to go."
miyeon immediately slapped your hand away as she stood up to fix herself
you laugh once you see a slight scowl present onto her face as she whined, "i hate you," before nudging you goodbye and walking to the set
you literally got her worked up in just a few minutes of stroking her thigh
MINNIE
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would immediately catch on what you're trying to do and would pretend like she doesn't care
she knows that you want a reaction from her
so she ain't gonna give you one :)
low-key feels aroused from the thought of being caught by someone
she smirks to herself as she feels your hand grip onto her thigh in frustration of her not paying you any attention
pretends to yawn to annoy you further
tenses up when you suddenly pressed your thumb onto her center, almost choking since she did not expect that
you smirk as you finally got her, slowly rubbing circles over her clothed heat, thinking how fortunate it was that she was wearing a skirt
she tries to stop squirming around
had to place a hand over her mouth to shut herself up
you slid your finger up and down her clothed slit, feeling her underwear slowly start to get wet
before you could even get a chance to move her panties aside, you felt her figure stand up and straddle your hips as she leaned close to your ear and purred,
"let's make this quick,"
SOOJIN
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momma knew right away what you were trying to do
would react slightly similar to soyeon;
shocked, eyes widened, her head immediately turned to your direction
'are you crazy?' soojin mouthed to you, a smirk tugging at her lips in amusement
you bat your eyelashes innocently as you smiled at her in question, playing dumb
soojin rolled her eyes playfully and stopped your hand before they could grab the hem of her shorts
"be a good girl for me, and keep your hands to yourself."
"were almost done with the shoot, ill take care of you at home."
as much as she wants to, she knew to herself that she can't since she won't be able to focus afterwards
after seeing you pout, she decided to give you a kiss on the lips
would much rather not risk getting caught
YUQI
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ticklish baby immediately flinched and let out a surprised yelp (which to your luck, no one paid any attention to)
yuqi covered her mouth to stop any other sounds from leaving her lips
her mood immediately changed; from being all giggly to suddenly being quiet with her ears slowly turning red
yuqi looks over at you and was annoyed to see that you were pretending to scroll through your phone, a smirk present on your lips
before she could call you out, yuqi flinched as your hand squeezed her inner thigh and she moaned softly in her hand
is really anxious that someone might walk in but at the same time, the thrill of getting caught was slightly arousing
yuqi was an expressive person
so she accidentally moaned loudly when your hand cupped her clothed center
the two of you froze
even the staff and the other members a few feet away from you stopped talking
as the silence continued, yuqi's face turned dark red and you tried to stop yourself from laughing
"you have no idea how much i hate you right now"
SHUHUA
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a panicked gay
would start squirming in her seat once your fingernails dragged onto her skin
she starts blinking really fast, her eyes nervously darting around all over place
would shakily start singing out loud as she tried to ignore your hand that was inches away from her heat
her singing would get cut off as her voice cracks from the sudden movement of your hand;
your hand palmed shuhua's center
"wait, wait, wait!" shuhua immediately grabbed onto your arm as she whisper-shouted at you
you broke into a fit of laughter at her before she whispers again;
"are you sure were doing it here?"
"we might get caught"
babygirl wants it but the risk of getting caught was too high
shuhua slaps your hand away before standing and pulling you up with her
she leads you both to the bathroom and locks the door
"let's be quick"
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
i feel like i just wrote 6 imagines with the same concept except they're all in bullet point forms🙃
anyway, im sorry if this took a little longer than i expected since my ass just couldn't shorten everything
also, i think this was a little bit smutty i'm sorry–
i have no idea what this is but i hope it's okay anon! thank you very much for requesting :) and yes, ive been drinking water thank you for worrying anon
i hope everyone is also safe uwu
thats all, thanks for reading❣
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grotesquegabby · 5 years ago
Text
Girl That You Love
song request Panic at the Disco drawing and writing (Mags)
@post-itpenny
Im going to write a what if scenario involving Alex. Its something ive been wanting to experiment with cause Alex isn’t in a relationship and I love ship dynamics. One being the sweetest being with something as chaotic and (evil?) as him. Or something whose ah fuck you ill kick your ass unknowing of what he is. and no matter what just Ill fight you you wack ass bitch and him just....loving it. its hard to decide but...heres a scenario of a what if
It was a party like any other in his club. Music booming and loud, lights everywhere, and people dancing and moving to the beat. It was a blast!
Alex was handing out drink after drink, and there was an endless wave of new dance partners. Always someone new, someone different. People were drawn to him after all and his fun loving charismatic ways. Just as the thought passed more people entered the party. He was determined to not only have a good time himself but to have others have a good time. He approached a group and gestured to everyone, “Welcome to the club! First drink is on me!” The group cheered, all but one who rolled their eyes.
This caused one of the chaotic clowns eyebrows to quirk up and a big grin formed on his face, “How about you, you came to have fun right?” He teased them. They glared at him and flipped him the bird. Which only served to irk him a bit but he didnt show it, no.
Alex was too determined, if one person had a bad time at his party it ruined the flow...the flavor....it only takes one bad apple after all.
He held out a hand in a gesture of come in and join the party, but she slapped his hand away from her, “Designated driver....Nice try bud...” And walked off. Leaving Alex to feel.....annoyed. His grin stayed ever present though and he laughed it off. How boring, he could find someone more fun though.
He slipped off into the party once more. His movements matching that of the music. He’d enjoy himself despite the one sour mood of another.
A few hours had passed since than. The party seemed to have more wild than before. The energy Alex was sending out and receiving in turn was absolute bliss. Loving every bit of it. He was on the stage dancing with a group of just as wild and energetic humans.
He jumped down and into the crowd, instantly being caught and carried above it all. Crowd surfing was always fun to him. He patted the people carrying him across the crowd to let him down and they did. And where he landed he wasn’t expecting, or who he landed next to really. The minute he landed her eyes landed on him and he grinned, “Yo, we cross paths again” he said with a chuckle. Her mood seemed to shift instantly and she sneered, “Why are you talking to me...again.” His grin stayed ever present, “Just trying to spread some good times and laughs.” “Yeah right, by getting everyone completely wasted and making them stupid. Doesn’t sound like a good time.” She stated. “Oh yeah, and whats a good time to you then babe?” He laughed. Her head spun back in his direction and she glared. She took a step forward and stuck her finger into his chest, “Don’t call me babe, I know your type.” She started with a growl, “The party guy, acts like your friend but really your just an insecure asshole who bullies others and takes advantage of people in drunken state.” Alex’s grin slowly started to dissipate as he watched this human blatantly insult and berate him. She continued her arms going onto her hips, this tiny tiny human getting all up in his face! This tiny human who he could crush under his actual thumb. Who could hardly pass as even a snack. “And another thing!” He came back to reality a bit and heard her voice once more. “This party isn’t even that great! Its just lights, and some shitty music thats not even good.” Okay now she went too far, insulting his taste in music. Alex made a move to get in her space and show her this was his space, his domain, and he could crush her into the dust she came from. But when he got close, she went on the defensive. Clearly Alex’s movements were threatening as suddenly he felt some sort of force on his face and his sunglasses came off a bit.
He stood there shocked now more than ever. She hit him? The nerve of this human girl! He stared at her the surprise most evident on his face, and something else in him bubbling but not sure what. Her face was that of surprise but then turned to anger that seemed to her justified. “Leave me alone, think twice before coming at me again. Next time I won’t be so nice and I’ll kick your ass.” She turned and walked away and from the looks of it she was straight up leaving the club.
Probably for the best. Alex stood there surprised, annoyed as hell and wondering what the hell he was feeling. It was anger yes but something else...something new?
It felt...warm....and tickled a bit.
He didn’t know whether to hate it.....
or love it.....
love?
.
.
.
wait a minute....
Hell no!
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tfw-no-tennis · 4 years ago
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hunty movie 1
sooo ruth and i watched the first hxh movie holla
me as soon as we’re done w/the yorknew arc: OH FUCKY ITS ANIME MOVIE TIME
i love anime movies. theyre so often Entertaining As Hell, and also Not Very Good. its a very fun intersection 
overall this movie slots pretty easily into that category. it was a good time but nothing revolutionary. which is ok! and that makes sense bc its not canon apparently 
this movie was basically the ‘killua and kurapika have Trauma(tm)’ movie lmao 
we open w/killua having a trauma dream abt illumi, rehashing the stuff we saw in the hunter exam arc....we see this a few more times in the movie, and it really drives home how killua is still rlly scared of illumi and kinda just goes into a dissociative trauma state whenever illumi is around (even fake doll illumi or dream illumi, in this movie). poor kid :( :( 
regrettably tho ruth and i agree that illumis outfit in this movie was pretty sexy 
ok that whole beginning part where kurapikas eyes get stolen happens SO fast hvbfhdjshfsk its like ok guess thats the status quo for this movie!
jesus poor kurapika. they cant catch a fuckgin break huh
also that kid was totally the kid that was alluded to by kurapika at the end of the yorknew arc...so i guess that was included in the anime as a setup for this movie? 
also apparently that stuff was based off of a short story thing the author did a while ago which is p cool
leorios terrible drawing skills is hvhbjsdfbsdfngsjkdf
also leorio is so tender w/kurapika hhhhhhh im gonna die. im gonna gay die
and gon and killua are just. tiny soulmate boyfriends ok 
ah yes i see the obligatory movie original character who befriends the protag
it kinda cracks me up how hostile killua is to retz like vhbhskhdfbaj i get that its bc of Trauma and his fear of betrayal/betraying but it also reads as killua being a Jealous Gay which is kinda hilarious 
ruth and i when hisoka shows up: [prolonged annoyed groaning and dismayed yelling]
hisoka literally just shows up to sow chaos and throw around information to stir shit up huh
of COURSE the villain is the former 4th spider thats like. easy choice lmao 
it might just be the fansubs but i feel like there were strong implications that hisoka and 4th spider guy fucked bhjdfashfdjnakn
the most unbelievable thing abt this whole thing is that hisoka didnt kill that doll guy lmao 
ohhh shit its uvo
OHHH SHIT NOBUNGA AND MACHI....its so bad but i really like the troupe members and when they show up im like !!!!!!!
machi is so cooooool
aughhhh its like....i feel bad for nobunga for having to face down uvo like this....and THEN when pakunoda shows up too :( and nobunga tells her doll ‘rest in peace now’ or something when he cuts her down....oof. but also like theyre evil murderers so im!?! conflicted?!?!
also the shadow beast guys that uvo killed showing up and then proceeding to do LITERALLY NOTHING was kinda hilarious
and damn so technically the troupe is on the same side as the main crew, what with all of them wanting to wreck omokages shit
also omokage looks like sephiroth lmaoooo 
ill be honest i barely know what sephiroth looks like but ruth said this and i felt in my bones that its true 
ok i gotta talk abt the kurapika backstory stuff bc OUUGHGHGHGHGH my fucking UWUS BITCH!!!!
seeing a bunch of kurta was sad....and seeing baby-er kurapika OUGH and also pairo is sooo cute and him and kurapikas friendship is so pure 
kurapika is so different :( theyre like, so much more innocent and excitable....thats so damn sad bro wtf 
pairo pulling some slick moves swapping that little potion thing - all while using his blindness as a cover - was so good...no wonder he and kurapika get along so well 
also gotta say its even more brutal that one of the main reasons kurapika didnt get Big Murdered w/the rest of the kurta is bc pairo pulled this stunt - if he hadnt, kurapika wouldve failed the test and never would have left 
also kurapika saying theyre gonna find someone who can help w/pairos eyes ;_; the similarities w/leorios backstory/motivation makes me die 
and seriously im still caught up at how innocent and pure kp is oooof ough 
tho still defs the kurapika we know....theyve seemingly always had a temper, what with the reaction to the dudes in the market 
like, kurapika did NOT hold back...even after finding out that they were just part of the test! tho i do get it bc they insulted pairo...kurapika’s love for their friends/stalwart need to defend their friends is clearly a big thing 
also the market people’s reaction to seeing kp’s red eyes is rlly interesting to me...are the kurta like, known to anybody? or are they more of a vaguely talked-about group that like, ‘probably exists’? or is it that people know abt them but not the red eyes thing? it seems like these people, if any, would know, bc this market is seemingly a day’s travel from where the kurta live....i want more kurta lore bro!!
i big love pairo helping kurapika cheat like that....such an interesting twist, and makes it obvious that theirs is a friendship of equals 
anyways i loved that flashback stuff and it just drives home how absolutely fucked up and horribly sad kurapikas whole existence is, especially in this movie w/pairo’s doll being used against them
n e ways back to the non flashback stuff
i love that gon’s super nose returned for this movie omg 
im just auhghghghgh gon and killua know each other so well uwu....
aaaand illumi (well, doll illumi) is back to fuck shit up for poor killua
ugh it still gets me how clearly terrified of illumi killua is...we dont really see him act like this any other time :( and the fact that doll-illumi was able to scare killua enough to get him to run away and leave gon behind (albeit briefly) was oof 
gon jumping in front of killua and getting his eyes stolen instead....baby boyyyy oughhh
also can i just say thank fuck they didnt replace illumis eyes w/gons bc THAT wouldve been some serious nightmare fuel lmao 
cant believe killua then ran away again and walked emo-ly on the train tracks 
and THEN he saw a train coming and was like oh well :( guess ill die :/ JESUS KID 
but gon w/his Big Sniff Powers comes to the rescue!!
it was so cute how gon told killua that killua didnt run and abandon him - they were working together to fight :’) gon understands killua so well 
i love how the squad then squads up to fight omokage...with half of them being blind lmao 
and in the half that isnt blind is leorio, who STILL doesnt know nen, and literally brings a knife to a nen fight 
i totally saw the whole ‘retz is a doll and her older brother is omokage, and retz actually died a while ago’ thing coming lol but still, not bad
all omokage does is talk abt the beauty of his dolls or w/e like ENOUGH bro 
kurapika fighting pairo and killua fighting illumi (AGAIN) was all so fucked up they shouldve switched opponents for less trauma oof 
and poor leorio is literally no help vhhvdijfhjbashkj he just gets throw around this whole time
kurapikas fight against pairo was sad bc it was such a fucked up situation...kp did gr8 tho, i liked them saying that this isnt the real pairo, cause pairo would never say/do these things. still and extremely sucky situation to be in! 
meanwhile its the gon and killua vs doll-illumi rematch...and this illumi is like, a version of illumi drawn from killuas mind/heart (or something idk, it was kinda glossed over which i understand), which means that hes extra scary and focused on telling killua how much hes just a mindless killing machine who cant have friends 
but luckily we have gon here to help snap killua out of his trauma haze, which certaintly wasnt the case at the hunter exam - so it was kinda nice to see how things went w/gon around :’) they work so well together oughhhhh....and they love each other so much broo gay preteen love real 
hisoka just fuckgin materializing in the house place to help sow more chaos....unbelievable 
me: i bet hisoka wont want to fight doll chrollo bc its not The Same as real chrollo 
ruth: no i think he will bc hes a whore 
hisoka: [fights doll chrollo] 
me: oh shit u right 
kurapika: ok omogake its time for you to FUCKING DIE- 
and then killua stops them and says that he’ll do it, be he doesnt want kurapika to kill anymore :( :( :( bro im sooo fucking sad. killua rlly b out here thinking that hes already too far gone to matter when it comes to murder, but he doesnt want his friends to end up like that, so he might as well take on that burden, because whats one more person’s death on his hands? (EVEN THO HE SAID HE DIDNT WANT TO KILL ANY MORE...but theres exceptions when it comes to saving your friend’s souls and whatnot) :( :( AUGHHH
but luckily retz comes THRU with some good ole fratricide
killua: [takes notes]
the fact that the phantom troupe just fuckgin shows up and is like oh hey its you guys. this casual enemy stuff kills me lmao i love it 
then they just fuckgin LEAVE and theyre like welllll we cant rlly fight u bc of chrollo’s state so by i guess. its NOT On Sight but someday it will be! YOU TOO HISOKA DONT THINK WE FUCKIGN FORGOT ABOUT YOU. 
dramatic house burning! and rip retz, saw that one comin tho 
when they all went thru and said their life goals and then killua was like shit i dont have a cool definitive anime goal LMAOOOO
but THEN gon said his goals should be to stay by gon’s side UHMMM???? baby gays AUGHHHHH and killua is just like lovestruck AUGHHHH 
Gays Win 
then they all peace out to resume the next arc lmaoooo
and then we see flashes of other characters, like the blonde girl (who ruth and i totally thought retz was, seeing thumbnails from this movie....we were like w8 hasnt that girl not been introduced yet??? lmao)
we also see some dude w/long hair and a hat who ive never seen before but ruth went OHHH ITS SCYTHE GUY!!! so i guess hes gonna b important?? lol 
and then we saw chrollo....still in the same place the squad left him vbhajfdjkahsbfkdjabhsukfdj CAN HE NOT GET DOWN FROM THERE W/OUT NEN OR AN AIRSHIP??? THATS SO FUCKING FUNNYYYYYY ARE YOU KIDDING ME 
general thots:
so this was very much an Anime Movie, in that they cant like, advance to plot or develop the characters much, bc its a movie. and this one is non canon
it was enjoyable but i do feel like it was much more typical shounen then hxh usually is...like, i feel like this was made by the same people who make like, the naruto movies or w/e, and w/the same sort of approach/attitude 
this isnt necessarily bad - i LIKE shounen for a reason - but it was a bit noticeable bc it wasnt quite as smart as hxh is usually, and it rehashed a lot of stuff weve already seen in this show itself 
but still i think it did a good job w/what it had, and it had some good angst, and everyone was very gay which is good
the art style was SLIGHTLY wack but it wasnt as bad as i thought itd be 
overall a fun time like most anime movies. didnt reinvent the wheel but i had a good time. im excited for the greed island arc, and im also disproportionately excited to watch the hxh musical bc that is a thing that exists and i MUST see it asap bc that sounds like the kind of hilarious wackiness that appeals to me specifically
so thats it...later! 
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