#for the unaware it started as 'these two are so closely tied together canonically if there was a fandom they would be a main ship'

[red-dyed-sarumane]

a lot of times i think my art styles kind of stagnated but im looking at old sketches and like. okay maybe not.

or like looking at the first doodle of the girlies which was supposed to be a joke vs the girlies i draw in 15 minutes when im bored this year

[phoenixyfriend]

Rey Gives No F*cks About the Grandfather Paradox

Okay so since nobody’s suggested a fic under these terms, I ended up expanding on this post on discord and things snowballed. We kept to the basics of the entire plot revolving around Rey really hating her grandad and leveraging her blood relation to not be unalived about it.

With contributions by @atagotiak​, @dracothulhu​, @thepallaspalace​, and several others. The title comes from @gelpenss​.

The basic thing I absolutely need is this: Rey gets thrown back to the middle of the clone wars, and the subsequent plot leans in really heavily on her being, genetically-via-clone-dad, the daughter of the guy running the entire galaxy.

Nobody knows what to do with her.

The timing is mid-TCW for the past (because I want Ahsoka there) and vaguely between Episodes 8 and 9 because I... never watched E9 and don’t want to worry about the timeline. The only things that matter is that Luke is dead (he can die as he did in canon) and that Rey knows she’s Palp’s granddaughter (not the way she does in canon).

We'll say Luke found out from Anakin's panicked force-ghost and just went "well, fuck, okay, I should tell her this before she ends up in a situation like mine and finds out mid-battle or something."

Luke, prior to time-travel: Okay, so, now that I'm dead I know some things I didn't before. Like who your parents were. In the interest of full disclosure because I was in a very similar situation and I don't want you learning the way I did, I'm just going to come right out and say that your father was a clone was Sheev Palpatine. Rey: ... Luke: Are you okay? Rey: I don't know who that is.

(She grew up on Jakku, the history education was a little subpar.)

Setting The Scene

Imagine Rey showing up during or immediately before the clone wars. There’s this phenomenally powerful feral teenager from a desert backwater who tells you that if you ran a paternity test, it would probably pop up the Chancellor. She may or may not bring up cloning. She accuses said Chancellor of being a Sith Lord.

Your other phenomenally powerful feral teenager from a desert backwater, who may not be a teenager anymore but only barely, is very offended by this because Palpatine’s a Very Nice Old Grandfather Figure, but also he’s a little full of side-eye because if the blood test comes back as proof, then Palpatine had a kid and didn’t even know about them, or lied to Anakin, and that’s! Bad! Family’s important!!!

Palpatine hears about this daughter he apparently? Has? And is very confused because the timing doesn’t match up with ANYTHING he was doing, so the kid isn’t natural, and he says as much. (There is an explanation! It’s not a correct explanation, but he does come up with one.)

Finn and Poe and BB-8 all get dragged along because why not have the gang there? Nobody that’s already born, because [handwave] conservation of souls or something, IDK, point is the only person dragged along that’s even remotely close to already existing is Luke’s Force Ghost, who mostly hangs around begging Rey to be less impulsive. Finn is good because he is a nice polite boy, but for actual useful information they need Poe. The unfortunate situation is that the three do not land together. They land at the same time, in completely different corners of the galaxy. This means that nobody is there to curb Rey being her most impulsive self.

Time travel Rey knows two things. Luke’s dad ends up evil. Palpatine has always been evil.

She can solve one of these problems by killing the other, yes?

Rey: Ready to Rumble

See, the initial idea was this: Rey tried to break into the senate to kill Palpatine, got arrested, and then used the "he's biologically my father" card to get out of jail free. (Force Ghost Luke follows her like “please take five seconds to think this through.”)

But.

But.

It would be very, very, very funny if The Force just dumps her in a flash of light in the senate building and she just attacks Gramps on sight. Just a shouted "YOU!" and no-hesitation attempted murder.

Palpatine has no idea what's going on.

Rey took maybe two seconds to get identity confirmation and then started swinging.

[Image Description: An individual in a green metal helmet with an eye slit, holding a pistol. In the upper left, upper right, and lower middle are the phrases “I do not know who I am...” “I don’t know why I’m here” and “All I know is that I must kill.” End description.]

Of course, she gets arrested. There are Master Jedi in the Senate. There are Clone Troopers. Palpatine isn’t the weak old man he pretends to be. Of course she’s stopped.

But she isn’t executed in time for Palpatine to stop her from ruining his entire reputation.

Immediately after Rey fails to kill her Shitty Granddad, Luke's ghost shows up and begs her to not talk about the Sith thing because it will completely undermine everything she's trying to do. Pass off the attempted murder as something else!

Rey, panicking: "that fucker left me on a desert planet for 10 years!" "You owe me 19 years of child support you son of a Hutt!"

The Jedi have to do the investigation, because the girl showed up with a laser sword, and the conversation is, uh... interesting. (“Where did you get that lightsaber?” “I got it from a mysterious old pirate lady I never met before. I don't know, I was being shown around by a smuggler and a Wookie.”)

Interviewer: Why did you try to assassinate the Chancellor? Luke: Say it wasn't assassination. Rey: It wasn't assassination. Int: You weren't trying to kill him? Luke: Assassination has to be politically motivated. Rey: This was, um... not political. Assassination is political, right? Int: You mean this was personally motivated? Rey: Yes. Int: I see. What personal motivation? Luke: Jakku! Rey: He's my grandfather. Int: ... Rey: Possibly father. Nobody was very clear on that. Int: ... Luke: Tell them to run a paternity test. Rey: Oh hey, a blood test would tell us which, right? Int: ............ Rey: I spent ten years as an orphaned scrapdealer on Jakku. He's my father. I'm kind of a little angry. Int: ........... Luke: Good job, kid. You bought yourself some time. Int: I'm going to get a medic to see about that parternity test.

Obviously, it comes back positive. Congratulations, Sheev, you’re the father.

Rey comes with a ready-made built-in excuse for hating Palpatine that nobody can question or fault her for!

Rey, pouring Truth into the Force: I didn't even know I was related to the Chancellor until a few months ago, but it's his fault I grew up the way I did, and he should take some responsibility!

The entire thing is mostly kept hush hush but someone leaks it to the press and Palpatine's ratings tank.

"Chancellor, I think we'll need to waive family visitation until she wants you a little less dead." "I would like to find out why she wants me dead, and indeed, where she came from." "...sir, for your own safety--"

Who would win? A master plan years in the making spanning decades of manipulating and work? or One (1) paternity test

"Okay, so, Rey Palpat--" "Ew, no, I don't want his name." "You--okay. Sure, we can understand that. Is there a name you would prefer to put on the paperwork?" Rey, who would have gone by Skywalker in honor of Luke but can't do that when Anakin is right there and all: "Can I think about it?"

Rey: I don't know what I want my last name to be but I know I don't want his, and most of the people I’d want a name from have famous families like you... Luke's ghost, pointing out the Literal Nobody that she cares about a lot: How about Solo? Rey: ...Solo, then.

(A few months later she runs into Poe again and he offers for Finn and Rey to both take his name because honestly they need SOMETHING but at that point she’s already decided on Smuggler Dad.)

Backtrack a bit. We’ve got a bigger cast.

They all arrive separately. Poe, for one, does better than Rey, who is aiming for a murder, but not quite as well as Finn, who is currently being adopted and hidden like a secret cat by a bunch of Alpha Clones on Kamino. He vibes with the names-or-numbers thing. He doesn’t necessarily tell them where and when he’s from, but he’s very sweet and a great liar and they adopt him wholesale anyway.

The Finn situation is just... "Buir Ti, we need you to hide this man, we've decided he's our little brother but if Nala Se finds out she'll make him leave."

Of course, this leads into Shaak Ti teaching Finn how to Jedi.

Maybe consider Finn needing to almost be tricked into learning Jedi things because he willfully forgets it could apply to him. Finn does not like to think of himself as special, which is super valid, but frustrating for Shaak Ti when it comes to, you know, getting him to acquire knowledge. Finn's training at some point is "here, levitate objects with the Force to entertain the tubies." It’s a lot easier to convince him to practice when it involves the babies.

(Everyone on Kamino looked at Finn and went “oh I love him I’m keeping him and teaching him things.”)

(He’s just very lovable.)

Poe, meanwhile, buys the trust of Anakin Skywalker via R2D2 declaring BB-8 the absolute most baby of droids. R2D2 met BB-8 three hours ago but.

"Hey Obi-Wan this is Poe I met him like five days ago but R2D2 says he checks out because his droid is a baby." "That's nice, Anakin, did you know the Chancellor has a daughter who tried to assassinate him in broad daylight yesterday? Because guess who had to stop the Chancellor from getting assassinated by his daughter in broad daylight yesterday."

A summary so far:

Finn, on Kamino: Hey, um, I don't know where this is, but it's not where I was a few minutes ago. Do you think you could get me a comm? What's your name? Poe, on [dice roll] Denon: Oh, hey, you're General Skywalker? Nice to meet you, I'm so sorry about my droid, she's a little excitable and thought your R2 unit looked like a friend of hers-- Rey, on Coruscant: DIE, GRANDFATHER

Finn: [Peacefully vibing on Kamino, unaware of the chaos and bonding with the clones] Poe: [Trying to explain how he knows someone who tried to kill the chancellor and defend Rey] Rey: [Arrested for trying to kill the chancellor]

Just... just...

Anakin: Some guy ended up lost on base yesterday with his droid, how’s your day going? Obi-Wan: I had to stop someone who claims to be the chancellors daughter from murdering the chancellor after she seemingly blinked into existence in the Senate building. Poe: 😐

(Poe: Oh, so that's where Chaos^2 went.)

Poe: In her defense, she is his... well we don't know if she's his daughter or granddaughter, but she's definitely related to him, and she definitely grew up in a shitty situation that was his fault, so...

(Poe is trying very hard to explain this and not get arrested on the military base.)

As you’ve probably guessed, what's especially funny about all of this for me is the fact that Palpatine is fully aware that this girl shouldn't exist, but can't find a single piece of evidence about where she came from. He didn't start any experiments that could result in a female child, and he didn't have sex in that period of time, so where the hell--

Rey spends so much time in jail... BUT they do eventually assign her a Jedi Master. Possibly before she actually proves her evil grandfather is in fact evil. Most votes went to either Plo Koon or Obi-Wan. Plo, because he’s dad-shaped, and Obi...

"Obi-Wan, you already raised one feral desert child with implausible amounts of power, you handle this." Rey in return is very "Sweet, you vaguely remind me of Master Luke," and nobody knows who the hell she's talking about. Obi-Wan is NOT on board with this plan, she'd really be better off with Plo or like........ Mace.

Reunion Tour

What I need out of this is the eventual Finn and Rey reunion scene that is just excited screaming while someone in the background explains to Shaak Ti that yes this is apparently Palpatine's terrifyingly force-sensitive daughter who hates him.

(Finn senses Rey’s approach and just. Gathers the everyone to wait. He’s just :D REY MY FRIEND REY GUYS MY FRIEND REY IS COMING.)

Anakin shows up with Poe--just a guy who signed on to the military, no big deal--and then Poe and Rey are EXCITED and everyone's just like "Cool, how do you know this literal terrorist child?" And Poe has to scramble and "Uhhhhhhhhhhhh she saved my droid from a scrapheap once and BB-8 is basically my child so I owe her one."

Rey knows that Anakin ends up evil so she’s maybe not actively hostile but definitely very “I’m watching you.” That said, she vibes with him on a lot of things that he maybe doesn’t actively notice.

Rey picks up a snake, snaps off the head for venom avoidance, and starts biting off chunks. Obi-Wan's reaction: [undisguised horror] Anakin and Ahsoka: Ooh, where'd you find that? (Obi-Wan: And now I’m up to three feral children.)

What Does Palpatine Even Do?

OBVIOUSLY at a certain point, Palpatine is just phoning up every ally he has to figure out who broke protocol to synthesize a daughter for him.

So of course, Palpatine blame Plagueis.

She'd have been born five or so years before Naboo, just a few years younger than Anakin. It's such an EASY theory to build a conspiracy around. It is ENTIRELY WRONG, but it’s plausible! And anyone who might have been involved to say otherwise is probably dead!

A random bio-kid shows up you can’t possibly have contributed genes to? Maybe it’s the evil bio spark that did it.

Palpatine tries to placate her with the ‘my genes were stolen for an experiment and I didn’t know’ thing. It doesn’t work because her actual main complaint is he’s evil in her future but he tries.

It'd be a struggle to even get access to her, because of the aforementioned “maybe don’t try to talk to the daughter(?) that hates you” thing, but you know who Palpatine does have access to? The Chosen One.

Rey kind of decides on her favorites early on (she gravitates to Dad Energy and Sad Old Men so Plo and Obi-Wan are on her list, and that means decent time around Anakin and Ahsoka). It's really easy to talk Anakin into helping to some degree because "he'd like to connect to a daughter he never knew" and "a child of her power on a planet like that, you'd know her struggle, my dear boy" and so on. Anakin tries to connect! He tries to play up Sheev’s kind political work and how it can’t have really been his fault! It doesn’t work. Rey does not believe a word of it. Mostly she doesn’t even seem to hear him.

Rey's just like "...oh right, you're the melted mask that Kylo Ren was always ranting about," which means absolutely NOTHING to Anakin, but he mentions it to Palps, who loses his goddamn mind trying to figure out what she's talking about, because it also means absolutely nothing to him.

Here’s the thing: Rey’s already decided that Obi-Wan is cool, because Luke said so, and Plo Koon is dad-shaped, and she also gravitates towards earnest kindness in general, like she made friends with Finn real quick, so Ahsoka? Already getting along great.

She doesn’t dislike Anakin, really, he isn’t evil yet, he’s just... meh. She’s a little suspicious and she likes him less than the others but... Anakin.

Rey, to Anakin: You are my least favorite. Anakin, to Palpatine: YOUR DAUGHTER HATES ME???

And he goes from “she’s a lil standoffish” to “she doesn’t like me” to “she hates me” as is normal for Anakin.

It’s just an escalation of this one time Palpatine wants Anakin to not have rifts and trust issues with a person, at least not until later, because he needs information.

Meanwhile, that very moment, Rey is just like "huh, nobody here is listening to me about how make a sixth-hand carburetor work, where's Luke's dad?"

Anakin is venting to Palpatine about how hard it is to talk to Rey, and she's over in the Temple just like "Hey, that guy was useful last time, I should ask him," but also she only ever thinks of him as Luke's Dad.

(At one point, Obi-Wan is having a bit of a break down, and then Anakin starts having a breakdown about that, meanwhile the clones are (badly) trying to hide Finn behind their backs, Rey is watching Ahsoka practice and being like "I want two lightsabers," and Poe is trying to keep R2 from stealing BB-8 and Force Ghost Luke is just face palming in the background.)

(Rey deserved a saber staff, maybe one that can detach and turn into a jar’kai set. Possibly a pike. Mostly I just wish she got more chances to whack things with a big stick.)

[ootahime]

analyzing every gojohime moment in the manga >:) pt. 3

more and more paragraphs ahead.  BE PREPARED!

i’m also writing this at 3 am so please bear with the horrendous grammar and punctuation.

chapter 63

i know he’s probably like this with everyone but i love how excited he is bragging about his students to her.  he’s like a child telling his mother about an amazing adventure he had with his friends, making sure he mentions every detail.  in the anime, their conversation lasted for 3:41 :3 backwards 341 is 143 which means i love you.  

1 letter = i

4 letters = love

3 letters = you

chapter 63

i love her fit!  i also like how both of them like to wear baggy clothing that accentuates their collarbones `w` it’s like they’re matching in a way.  even if she did tell him to cut the crap, she still let him run his mouth to his content LOL i feel like if he didn’t compliment himself at the end, she would have said something different.  UGH HE LOOKS SO HAPPY CALLING HER

 ah, let me translate the conversation just in case anyone needs it.

utahime: you wanted to talk about the investigation, right?

gojo: well, got any idea who?

utahime: i have no idea.  no one seems suspicious.  what do we do now?  should we ask the students for help?

gojo: yeah, that’s fine.  i’m busy so asking the kids would be okay.  keep looking.  i’m counting on you.

I THINK THAT’S WHAT THEY’RE TRYING TO SAY.

OR it could mean that she’s asking if they should start investigating the students.  it would make sense either way because gojo says in the next panel that he doesn’t want to assume that the mole is a student, and in chapter 79, gojo sends the trio to utahime to help her.  

chapter 63

these two love their students to death.  neither of them wanted to assume that the mole was a student.  in chapter 79, when utahime is talking to the trio about the mole, nobara points out to the group that the traitor must be from kyoto because utahime is the one who’s reaching out to the tokyo side.  utahime has a dismal look on her face, almost like she’s saying, “i didn’t want it to turn out this way -- for this to be true.”  after mechamaru says his farewells to miwa on the train, mai tries to talk about what he did to which utahime says, “it doesn’t matter, he’s dead, after all,” with a similar sunken expression.  i just love how her care for the students is one of the biggest aspects of her personality that’s been showcased so far.  it’s also cool how it ties together with gojo’s belief that no child’s youth should be taken away.  i truly think these two have the capacity to understand each other to a deep level, down to the core.  seeing as utahime is also a teacher, it’s safe to assume that she also wants to raise the next generation of sorcerers to be strong.  utahime and gojo’s similarities and contrasting elements are so interwined, i really wonder if it’s intentional.  like am i looking too much into this?  are utahime and gojo really meant to be this connected?  think about it.  similar motivations, care of the kids, contrasting palettes, the bickering, long history.  IT’S JUST TOO MUCH. 

also can we mention how their phone calls and meetings must be heavily planned out?  this means they’ve talked and interacted with each other A LOT behind the scenes.  she doesn’t answer his call with “what do you want?  don’t bother me on my day off.”  she knows exactly why he’s calling her and they even speak in code.  she probably meets up with him and tells him to call her on a specific day and at a specific time.  they must know each other’s schedules very well in order to execute this investigation in complete secrecy.  when he says, “we can never be too sure who is listening in around utahime” it implies that they find calling a risk, so in order to guarantee that there is no one around, they have to meet up in person.  see where i’m getting at?  they talk A LOTTT and most likely are aware of each other’s daily lives.  

the fact that gojo is her main source of stress when he’s literally a 3 hour train ride away from her is hilarious LMAOOOO.  you know what that means, right?  he must call and text her constantly about random things to annoy her.  

chapter 65

ah yes, my favorite moment by far.  look at that smile on his face.  

chapter 65

he loves saying her name.  he probably rushed over with the sole purpose of doing something like this to her LMAOOOO like i mean, mei was in there with her so technically they both needed to be helped but judging from his words and expression, he only wanted to help utahime.  notice how mei’s not there in the debris.  could she possibly have suspected gojo’s presence or an outside force?  or was she fast enough to avoid being in the debris?  either way, her lack of presence in this scene helps highlight the fact that this is a special interaction between utahime and gojo.  he refers to her in a very familiar sense.  the most formal way to address someone is by their last name followed by the honorific, -san.  in gojo’s case, he should be calling her iori-san if they weren’t acquainted.  he doesn’t even bother to call her utahime-senpai.  granted, gojo is not the most respectful and socially competent person out there because geto points this out to him.  he isn’t even aware that she finds him annoying because he views her bad attitude toward him as her just playing along with him.  he probably thinks she’s flirting back LOLOL

since he asks her “you cryin?” that definitely means that gojo witnessed her crying on one occasion or maybe multiple.  who knows, the old utahime could have been a very emotional person.  while this is happening, mei is close to gojo, she then asks him if he would console her if she were to cry in a flirtatious manner.  gojo dismisses her attempt at flirting with him and says she won’t cry because she’s strong.  now normally, you’re supposed to face the person you’re talking to, GOJO.  he KEEPS his eyes on her even when more people come to join the conversation.  

now, we can all agree that geto, mei, and shoko are better at picking up social cues than gojo.  they probably knew the vibe of the conversation and decided to play along with gojo’s antics.  

chapter 65

WE were worried about you.

pay attention to the order of the characters that show up.  gojo makes his appearance first, then geto, followed by shoko.  based on utahime’s reaction to seeing shoko, it’s evident that these two share a close bond.  shouldn’t shoko be the one to arrive on the scene first?  she’s the closest to utahime and would therefore be more concerned about her condition, right?  i know shoko’s technique doesn’t really allow her to do anything other than treat the wounds of others, but if you heard your friend was missing, you would definitely rush to the scene.  

look at geto’s reaction when mei says, “you’re the one who’s picking on her, geto.  you don’t even know it.”  i think it’s mei who’s saying this because gojo calls geto “suguru”.  but anyway, mei is aware that they’re picking on her.  i don’t think she’s the type to legitimately bully someone for their strength.  her reaction to all of this is very playful and her “heh heh heh” is proof of that.  when geto shows up and swallows the curse before it gets to utahime, he says, “satoru.  it’s not nice to pick on the weak.”  by saying this, he pisses utahime off because he too, is joining in on gojo’s joke.  i believe he’s unaware that he’s making fun of utahime because his reaction is “gah!” with a sweatdrop.  he probably thought gojo was making fun of weak people in general.  

geto’s usually a gentleman seeing as it is canon that he is more popular with girls than gojo.  BUT WHO KNOWS...you gotta be a specific type of person to be best friends with gojo.  maybe he ain’t shit too...  okay, my point is that everyone is just playing along.  when shoko shows up, utahime is relieved to see her because shoko doesn’t tease her like this.  since utahime tells shoko to not become like those two, this implies that geto teases her as well (probably not as much as gojo).  we all know geto is really big on looking out for the weak so he probably wouldn’t have insulted her for real.  

verdict: utahime being weak is just a joke.  i’ve mentioned this so many times, sorry if it’s getting annoying and repetitive hehehehehe...

chapter 65

these three aren’t irresponsible.  geto and gojo are a troublesome duo for sure, but they’re dependable.  seems unlike them to forget something so simple and essential to pretty much every mission.   

chapter 65

here’s my headcanon.  they were hanging outside or in the car when their assistant manager got a call.  the assistant was informed that two days have elapsed since mei and utahime went on their mission (or last contacted someone).  

gojo: that’s weird.  mei’s with her so they should have finished exorcising the spirit sooner.

geto: you think something happened to them?  maybe it’s a strong special grade.

gojo: utahime probably dragged mei down with her.  poor mei-san~  

gojo gets up 

geto: where are you going?  

gojo: going to save utahime!  it’s fine i’ll put up a curtain!

manager: gojo wait!!!!!!!!!!!

geto sighs

shoko: that idiot’s always running off without us.

they pin the blame on gojo for saying that he’ll put up a curtain and leaving the assistant manager behind.  you know what this means?  he ran and the manager couldn’t catch up HEHE... why the rush, gojo?  were you actually concerned about her?  

tbh i don’t see gojo ever running to something unless it’s urgent.  the fact that he ran to save her says a lot.  

----

let me know if you have any thoughts or questions!  i forgot to add this but gojo had a more serious expression when he was explaining how they must’ve been trapped in a barrier that messes with time.  he then states, “we thought it was weird even though you’re here, mei.”  i know he was probably worried sick because if mei couldn’t be contacted then that means something must’ve happened to utahime too.  okay that’s it for now.  i’ll be bringing up this little detail i’ve noticed about utahime in the manga next :3

[the-witty-pen-name]

Deadbeat Pt. 3

Lee Bodecker x F!Reader

18+ ONLY 

Warnings: age gap (reader is 21), smut, cursing, abandonment, infatuation, cheating/divorce, angst, mild housewife kink, mentions of prostitution, mentions of alcohol, corrupt official 

Word Count: 4.7k

Summary: You work at the bar at the edge of town, the Sheriff is going through a divorce and needs to rent a room.

A/N: I’m terrible at writing summaries and I’m so sorry about that! I don’t think I would consider this a dark!fic, but it does cover a lot of themes, and topics that are darker than I usually write about- but I think that comes with the territory of writing about Lee Bodecker. I’ll make sure to update the warnings for each chapter and do not read if you are underage. I also ignored canon for this one.

This is unedited, and I missed anything I should include as a warning let me know! This chapter introduces some new plots and conflicts, so it jumps around a little more than the previous ones. 

I hope you all enjoy!

I also am having some writer’s block with my Obi-Wan Kenobi miniseries I was working on, so expect Part 3 sometime Sunday hopefully! So sorry for the delay on the final chapter. 

Tags and Requests are OPEN 

Part One // Part Two 

Henry Curtis was one of the most infuriating people Lee had ever met. Curtis was a writer for the Columbus newspaper and constantly pestering the Sheriff. Curtis seemed to have a sixth sense for whenever the Sheriff did anything. He was desperately trying to catch the Sheriff doing anything but so far had remained unsuccessful. Curtis was the biggest obstacle Lee faced in winning re-election. The man would show up out of nowhere, pen and pad in hand ready to find anything that would be enough to keep the Sheriff out of office.

Maybe Curtis was just doing his job, but Lee always felt like it was much more personal. It was probably just his own resentment of the man who was just doing his job. But the man didn’t have to be so goddamn invasive. When the Sheriff had devised his plan on offering to rent a room from you, he was so tied up in his own mess of divorce and his somewhat confusing feelings towards you he had completely forgotten about the press. They would have a field day with the divorce alone, but now on top of everything else, Lee knew he should be more careful.

Lee always had to be careful, especially if he was meeting Leroy Brown. Lee would make sure he drove way out of town, and always insisted they met at a different location every time. This would infuriate Brown but Lee was the only lawman he had working for him. Sometimes Lee would drive several hours out of the way, always at some deserted ghost town or some sad excuse for a diner or a bar. Always somewhere no one would recognize him.

Lee lied to you and told you he and a few of the deputies would need to drive out of town for a stakeout when he needed to meet with Brown. It was one of those nights, sitting in the cruiser with the headlights off, as he parked in an abandoned parking lot almost two hours out of town.

He had been able to put this off for a couple weeks, lying about other legitimate jobs getting in the way. Honestly, it was because he wanted to one, avoid anything that would cause suspicion from Henry Curtis hearing he was back in town and two, he was selfishly allowing himself to just spend his nights at his new home, spending all the time he could manage with you. It was like being in that little white house was a place where he could let himself be delusional, and time spent with you was what his life actually was, not this mess he was currently dealing with. He wanted out.

Lee knew he wasn’t a good man. He knew that his laundry list of offenses had tarnished his badge a long time ago. He knew what he was doing, and before he never cared. Now, he’s thinking about how his actions could affect you. You were innocent, unaware of everything he was stuck in. He knew you weren’t stupid, and he was sure the town knows some about his corruption. But now, he couldn’t rationalize away his actions for any reason when it came to you. Janie? She didn’t care and would encourage it. She’d be in on it too. She’d have no problem lying to ladies at Church or starting other rumors to keep the town talking about anyone but Lee. She was as power hungry as he was sometimes, which could be a testament as to how their loveless marriage held together for so long.

***

“Hi, I’m looking for a Ms. (Y/L/N)?” the man asked when he approached you, talking a seat at one of the barstools.

“Who’s asking for her?” you asked raising an eyebrow.

“I’m Henry Curtis, I work for the Columbus Dispatch.”

“The newspaper?”

“That’s the one.”

“Why are you looking for her?”

“I’m doing a story on her mother’s marriage to Harvey Tucker.”

“She’s not here tonight. But I can let her know you were here. Do you got a card?”

The man pulled out a business card from his wallet and slide it across the bar. You picked it up and read all the information before putting it in the pocket of your apron.

“Seems weird for the Columbus paper to want to do a story on that a month and a half after it happened,” you said skeptically.

“We did cover the story when it happened,” Curtis informed you. “Doing a follow up since the story broke about his wife missing.”

“Missing?” you ask. “Do they know what happened?”

“Robbed the bastard blind and then ran apparently,” Curtis said casually looking past you at the chalkboard on the wall. “Scotch, neat.”

“Yes, sir,” you reply, grabbing the bottle from the shelf. “Has anything else been found out yet?”

“Not yet, that’s why I’m here. Checking in to see if she’d come back here because I heard Ms. (Y/L/N) still lives around these parts.” He then pulled a newspaper out of the inside pocket of his coat and started flipping through the pages.

“She has another kid too, right?” you asked, playing dumb. “A boy, I think. Do you know where he is?”

“Couldn’t say,” he sounded very indifferent, “Most likely went with her but who knows? I went to the Sheriff’s office to see if they knew anything but the Sheriff wasn’t there.”

“That’s too bad,” you say. “I’m sure Sheriff Bodecker would help you help if he can.”

Your statement made Mr. Curtis chuckle, but you didn’t follow up on it. You were just focusing on getting as much information about your mother and brother as you could.

“Speaking of Mr. Bodecker,” he began, “I recently saw his wife is getting remarried. Saw the announcement of the engagement in the paper.”

“Yeah, that’s right,” you respond, skeptically. You didn’t know why but you didn’t trust this man. It was something in the tone of his voice, or maybe it was just how he held himself. Very polished, a suit and a nice dress jacket. He looked very out of place in this town, and this little bar.

“You familiar with the Sheriff at all, miss?”

“Not too well,” you shrug, “Haven’t had any run-ins with the law myself.”

“Not even a speeding ticket?” He asks, only a little condescendingly.

“Can’t get a speeding ticket if you don’t have a car,” you point out.

“Touché,” he chuckles before taking a sip of his drink.

He doesn’t ask you anymore questions, and when he leaves, he gives you a five-dollar tip.

***

Lee receives his cut from Brown. There was nothing new to report on that front and his meeting went by smoothly. All Lee had to do was to turn a blind eye, and make sure the rest of the department stays unaware of the brothel’s existence. Brown always insisted on meeting with him, wanting to know what the Sheriff’s department was investigating and making sure his businesses stayed under the radar. He felt sick, and is preoccupied with the fact he has an envelope of dirty money in the cruiser’s glovebox.

It’s around midnight when he pulls up to the house. He expects that you’re already asleep, but he notices the lamp is on in the living room. He takes the money out of his glovebox and tucks it away into the inner pocket of his jacket. Coming inside, he finds you on the couch, knees pulled to your chest, staring at the business card Mr. Curtis had given you. You face is stained with dried up tears, and you still haven’t even changed out of your work clothes.

“What’s that?” he asks, the sight of you breaking his heart. He winces because he comes off a lot harsher than he meant.

“Some reporter came while I was at work wanting to talk to me,” you explain softly, you sound exhausted. “Wanted to talk to me cause he’s doing a story on my mother. Apparently, she’s on the run from the Columbus police.”

You extend your hand to give Lee the card. He feels his jaw clench when he reads the information. “What happened?” he asks, taking a deep breath and sitting down next to you.

“I pretended I wasn’t me,” you say, another tear rolling down your cheek. “He came in asking for me so I said I’d pass his card on. I didn’t want to tell him who I was because he didn’t explain why he was looking for me at first. I don’t know- just scared me. I’m more upset about the news itself than him.”

“You did the right thing,” Lee said softly, placing a hand on your shoulder comfortingly. He was angry, but he didn’t show it. It worried him, fucking Curtis snooping around this close to you. It made him feel protective, wanting to shield you from the whole ordeal. He had been on the receiving end of unsolicited attention from the press and he knew how ruthless they were. He knew this wouldn’t be the only time Curtis would try to get in touch with you. He’d find out where you lived, he’d continue to show up while you were working- the whole nine yards. He didn’t want you going through that.

Curtis talking to you also made him incredibly paranoid. It was his two worlds that he desperately wanted to keep apart were colliding. He knew it was impossible, but he so wanted to keep you separated from the other part of his life. It wasn’t who he wanted you to see. Hell, he hasn’t even been here for a month. It wasn’t that he wanted to keep you in the dark, at least that wasn’t entirely intentional. Actually, he wasn’t sure, maybe it was intentional. However, it wasn’t just you he wanted to hide aspects of his life from. He wanted his involvement with Brown and others hidden from every goddamn registered voter. You were no different, he tried to rationalize. But that wasn’t true. These feelings he harbored for you, were getting worse. He needed to unwrap himself from this situation, and for the sake of you finding out he was a shill, keep you away from that asshole. He didn’t want to let himself think about how the way you look at him would change.

And here he was, making the situation all about him. It was in his nature.

“He’s just going to show up again if I don’t call him,” you say, wiping your eyes. “Maybe I should just call him in the morning. Just be honest and say I don’t know anything. He can keep coming around but nothing is going to change.”

“I can take care of it,” he says. He couldn’t risk you talking to Curtis again. For all he knows, Curtis would tell you all about the story on the Sheriff he’d been trying to confirm for years. Lee knew he couldn’t let that happen. He fully intends on telling you, but how the hell do you bring that up? ‘Hey doll, I’m also on the payroll of every pimp and bootlegger in a ten-mile radius, just letting you know.’ It wasn’t going to come up, unless Curtis tells you about it. He’d be hoping to pull himself out if it, show you how you made him want to be better.

For now, he settles for comforting you, and just being there to take care of you. Make you feel better. He wraps an arm around your shoulder and lets you cry into his chest. He sighs, kissing the top of your head in a friendly way and you curl up against him. Under different circumstances, you probably wouldn’t have let yourself do this- show your vulnerability or allow anyone to comfort you like this. But it was all the events of the past month, your mother leaving, everything, just all hitting you at once, and you were happy you weren’t alone.

In the morning, you wake up on the couch with a blanket over you. You see Lee asleep in the chair, and you realize he stayed with you all night. It makes your heart flutter. You pull the blanket up over your chin and close your eyes again. You felt surprisingly well rested. The stress and worry were pushed to the back of your mind long enough to let you get some sleep. It still lingered in the back of your mind, but you reminded yourself that for now, there was nothing you could do. You had the day off, and you let yourself have a little longer time to sleep in.

You woke up to the smell of coffee brewing and the sound of sizzling on the stove. When you opened your eyes, Lee was no longer in the chair. You sat up and looked toward the kitchen, where you saw Lee with his back to you while he worked with the pans on top of the stove. The portable radio was positioned on the counter, and it was playing at a low volume, so it wouldn’t wake you up.

“Hey,” you say softly, still waking up as you walk into the kitchen.

“Morning, doll,” he says, glancing back at you for a moment. “How’re you feeling?”

“A little better,” you admit, grabbing a mug for yourself out of the cabinet. You pour yourself a cup of coffee, savoring the smell before making it how you usually take it. “Thank you for sitting with me,” you say honestly, “you didn’t have to do that.”

“I wanted to,” he says with a small grin. “I just wanted to help.”

“I really appreciate it, Lee,” you reiterate your thanks, hopping up to take a seat on the counter, watching him cook breakfast. “Didn’t know you knew how to cook,” you joke, making him chuckle.

“I’m full of surprises, sweetheart,” he smirks, making you feel flushed. You take another drawn out sip of your coffee to try to distract yourself. You watch his arms, and his hands as they maneuver and flex when he cooks. You imagine how they must feel, your eyes focused on the veins. You bit your lip and it reminds you of the dream you had a little while back when he first moved in. You imagine him stepping in between your legs as your propped up on the counter, his hands gently gripping your thighs and-

“I’ll get it,” you announce hurriedly as you hear someone knock on the front door. You hop off the counter careful to not spill your coffee, and head to answer the door. Lee watches you bounce out of the room, fixing your hair as you go and you don’t catch his smile.

“Arvin,” you say surprised, stepping out onto the porch. “What are you doing here?” you ask, with a small grin. You’re confused but nonetheless happy to see him.

“You look like you’ve been crying,” he observes, concern written all over his face.

“Yeah, I’m okay,” you say dismissively, “Just last night I was thinking about my ma and everything. Just had trouble sleeping is all.”

“The Sheriff didn’t do anything?” Arvin asked in a hushed tone, looking over your shoulder to see if Lee could hear you two.

“No, nothing, he’s been perfectly fine,” you say coming to the Sheriff’s defense. “I know you and Ms. Russell are worried, I know how it must look- but Arvin I swear he’s just my tenant. He’s been nothing but a gentleman.”

“Just making sure,” he says, letting it go for now. “Lenora asked me to bring these by for you.” He hands you the glass baking dish that you can see is filled with homemade cinnamon rolls. “She’s been practicing making all kinds of baked goods for when the Church does that bake sale and has me running all over town giving it away cause me and Uncle Earskell can’t keep up with it all.”

“Tell her thank you for me,” you say with a smile, “And I’ll bring the dish with me to Church tomorrow- give it back to her.”

“She misses you I think,” Arvin says sheepishly, pushing his hands into his front pockets. “I mean- I do- I think my whole family does- we all do. I’m sorry my grandmother hasn’t asked you over in a while…”

“I understand,” you nod. “Reputation is an important thing.”

“I just didn’t want you to think it was because of us,” he says looking down at the porch, his eyes fixed on a loose board. “You know how she is- everything no matter the context is somehow a sin. Scared to death of her own shadow…”

“I know you’re not that resentful, Arvin Russell,” you chuckle and he relaxes. “And I don’t hold any hard feelings towards anyone in your family- you all have always been good to me.”

“Well, um,” he says awkwardly, looking like he was holding back from saying more. “I got to hit a couple more houses before I head to work, so I guess I’ll see you tomorrow at Church?”

“I’ll be there.”

“Oh- I wanted to let you know,” he says, turning around as he’s already heading down the front steps, “The principal down at the high school is looking for secretaries- Lenora heard and thought you might be interested. It pays like $35 a week, I think. You should call Linda Carson; I think Lenora said- that’s the woman who’s in charge of hiring people, I think.”

“I’ll call the school first thing Monday morning,” you say, grin stretching from ear to ear. Arvin nods and says goodbye again. You walk back into the house like you’re on top of the world. You couldn’t contain your excitement. That job if you could get it would be a dream. You’d be making so much more than you’re already making. You were so excited.

“You’re in a much better mood than when I last saw you,” Lee jokes. He’s sitting at the kitchen table reading the newspaper while he eats his breakfast. You notice that he made you a table setting- brought your coffee over and everything. You place the baking dish in the middle of the table and sit down.

“That was Arvin,” you say happily, and Lee feels his heart sink into his stomach.

“Oh yeah?” he asks, trying to not let on how his heart feels like it’s crushed. He knew it was only a matter of time before a boy would come around- whether it be Arvin or someone else your own age.

“Well, first he was just dropping off baked goods Lenora made,” you say gesturing to the dish on the table. “He’s going around to everybody, I guess. He mentioned the high school is looking for office secretaries- Lenora wanted me to know. Thirty-five dollars a week! I’m going to talk to Linda Carson about it Monday morning. Can you imagine? I could get a secretary job.”

Lee feels just a crash of relief wash over him. He’s so happy that you are looking at a new job. You deserve better than that bar. He knew you deserved the job just as much as any of the other candidates. You work harder than anyone he knows.

“That’s fantastic, sugar,” he replies. “You deserve it.”

“Do you think I have a chance?” you ask, feeling a little self-conscious- you knew you weren’t as experienced as other candidates would be for sure.

“Of course, I do,” he says, putting down the paper to give you his full attention. “I feel like you getting this job is a definite. There’s no doubt about it.”

“You’re just buttering me up,” you scoff, finishing up your food, making him chuckle. You may have also seen his cheeks redden, but you couldn’t say for sure. You finish off your coffee, and then bring you dishes back to the kitchen, leaving them in the sink. Lee turns his attention back to his newspaper and you head upstairs to get ready for your day.

When you head upstairs, Lee notices that you took the radio with you- and he could hear you were listening to music from upstairs. He decides before it’s too late to ring Mark Cunningham. The line rings a couple of times before Mark answers.

“Cunningham.”

“Morning, Mark. It’s Sheriff Bodecker,” he smirks.

“What can I do for you Sheriff?” he asks, the sound of shuffling paper comes through as well. Most likely flipping through the paper.

“I wanna call in that favor you owe me,” he says, casually pacing the living room, holding the receiver up to his ear and the base of the rotary phone in the other.

“Of course, Sheriff,” he says. A while back, Bodecker busted the principal making moonshine in his old barn that was at the end of his property. Lee looked the other way and was waiting for the right thing to call in a favor for.

“I want you to hire (Y/N) (Y/L/N) for the secretary job,” he says, looking to the stairs, making sure you aren’t coming. The music is still playing loudly from upstairs so he determines he’s still got time.

“That’s all?” Mark asked surprised.

“That’s all I want from you,” Lee replies. “I expect you can make that happen?”

“Without a doubt. When can she start?”

“Still have her come in for an interview. I don’t anyone else knowing I called you about this- including her.”

“Done.”

With that, Lee hangs up the phone, feeling really good about this decision. He knew how much that job meant to you- he could see it in your eyes and how excitedly you talked about it. He can’t wait to see you when you find out you get the position. He knows it’s going to make you so happy. He knows you’d be a fantastic candidate, but this just eliminates any doubt. He reasons that there isn’t much difference, since you were very likely to get it anyways. He just had to make sure.

He can picture you know, coming home from the interview- excited to tell him that you got the job. You’d be so excited you’d jump up and hug him tightly, just so overjoyed that you let your feelings take over. You’d wrap your legs and around his waist and he’d hold you up by holding the back of your thighs. You’d wrap your arms tightly around him and bury your head in the crook of his neck. You’d lift your head up to look at him, embarrassed at your actions and then he’d press his lips to yours. You’d gasp softly, but your lips would melt against his own and your arms would wrap tightly around his neck. He’d walk forward, pressing you up against the wall and he’d kiss your neck mumbling praises of congratulations against your skin as his name falls from your lips at how good he’d make you feel. It’s almost unbearable how bad he wants you.

He heads to him room to get ready for his day, but his mind is still clouded with thoughts of you. He thinks about how much he wants nothing more that to just pin you on his mattress. He wonders if you know how crazy you make him. Sometimes there’s something in your eye that makes him think you want him too, but he’s not sure. His better judgement holds him back from everything he wants to do. He thinks about how it must feel to have his head right in-between your thighs. Back in the kitchen together, he wanted to just get on his knees and worship you. The feeling of them pressing against him as he sucks on your clit and runs his tongue across your folds.

Serval hours later, he can’t shake the thoughts, even sitting in his office at the sheriff’s station- working on a Saturday yet again. He’s cooped up in his office, unable to get through any of the paperwork that has piled up on his desk. He’s thinking about you, again, but in this daydream, you’re bent over his desk- because you came by to see him on your break from work at the school. His office door locked and his blinds pulled so he can bend you over and take you right there- rough and fast, sending you back to work with a feeling of him still there between your legs well after you’re back at your own desk, still sore from the encounter.

“You got a visitor, Lee,” the intercom on his desk lights up.

“Send ‘em in,” he responds back, shaking his head to snap out of it. He needed to get a grip.

“Sorry I didn’t call,” you say, walking into his office. His eyes widen and he wonders if he’s still day dreaming. He discreetly pinches himself. You’re actually here, standing in his office, while he looks at you dumbfounded. Part of him would think he manifested it if he was a man of any faith. “You forgot this,” you say, putting his wallet on the desk. “You must have taken it out of your back pocket before falling asleep in the chair last night. It was laying on the coffee table. I figured I’d stop by with it while I was coming up this way anyways.”  

“You’re a doll,” he grins, putting his wallet in his back pocket. “What are you doing?”

“I took the bus to the library to return some books, and now I’m going shopping for something to wear when I go in for an interview since I have the day off to go,” you explain. “I’m also probably going to get lunch after that before heading back home. I just didn’t want to be home in case that reporter stopped by. I’m not ready to talk to him yet.”

“I can take care of it,” he says, “He’ll make his way over here soon enough. I can talk to him.”

“You would do that for me?” you ask, the relief evident across your whole face.

“Yeah, I can talk to him, let him know you gave a statement here,” he says. You nod. “You know as much as he does, so it doesn’t matter if I tell him you don’t know shit or if you tell him.”

“You’re a lifesaver,” you sigh, so relieved thinking that you won’t have to hear from Henry Curtis again. “If he tells you anything about them… will you let me know?”

“Of course, sweetheart.”

“Thank you,” you say, hurriedly walking over behind him and quickly hugging his shoulders. You then are back by the door again before he can register the gesture. “Are you going to be home tonight?” you ask, your hand on the doorknob.

“Not until late,” he says reluctantly, and he can see the disappointment on your face- unless his mind was playing tricks on him.

“Okay,” you say finally, “Um, I’ll see you later then.”

“Bye, doll,” he says when you walk out of his office.

Are you going to be home tonight? Your voice lingers in his head. It was such a harmless phrase that could’ve just been one of curiosity. Maybe you were just asking because you were thinking about what you were doing for dinner. It most likely just meant nothing. But, the look on your face when he said no makes him think otherwise. Did it mean you cared? That you wanted to spend time with him? You wanted to see him and be with him as desperately as he needed you perhaps? Just the phrasing itself makes his brain feel like putty. It’s like you’re waiting up for him. It’s like you share the house in a way that’s much more than just him renting a room from you. It’s like you’re his and he’s yours. It’s like saying our house… our home. The question was so intimate and implied so much more about how you saw him and what he was to you. He knew seeing him as how he saw you was next to impossible, but you saw him as more than the Sheriff and more than just the jerk living in your house.

Part Four

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[shoezuki]

Tommy's prison/revival arc isnt well written actually

Anyways ive been wanting to talk on it a while for a bit here but havent had the Time or like. The thought to. But im gonna go off now.

First off im gonna say im ASSUMING this stream and plot of tommy being in the prison with dream is written entirely by tommy and dream. Wilbur May be involved in the latest stream but im not sure.

Bringing tommy back to life after only three days of him being dead did practically nothing to progress plot, the characters, or audience's understanding. In fact i feel that it damaged Other characters' potential and plot and already established plotlines.

The 'development' aspect

A really, really easy way to see if anything has changed or developed through an arc or plotline is to straightup just compare the 'beginning' to the 'end' in terms of the barebones situation. So;

Beginning: tommy is trapped in an isolated prison cell with dream, his own abuser who has hurt him in the past, for an unknown amount of time. He's terrified of dream and being stuck there with him.

End: tommy is trapped in an isolated prison cell with dream after being killed then revived by him, his own abuser whos hurt him in the past, for an unknown amount of time. Hes terrified of dream and being stuck there with him.

Okay. This is simplified obvious. But the point stands. ALTHOUGH the troupe of 'going back to the beginning' is common in the heroes journey its. It doesnt work here. Has tommy learned anything? Has he changed as a character? Is the severity of their situation any different? Have we, as the audience, learned anything new?

Im going to expand on that last point because i think it has the strongest potential argument. Technically for progression in literature and development of plot/characters, things can Change without them being Aware as characters. It can change just by the audience's perception changing or being challenge.

Slight example: i've been reading a webcomic called Your Throne. Its a fantasy/political drama about a noble lady who entered a competition with another noble lady to become the empress. The main lady lost despite her being a better fit, and the comic starts with the main lady trying to assassinate the empress. Its assumed and stated by the main lady that she 'ruined her life' and so thats all the readers know. However, later in the novel we see flashbacks to the competition itself and find that the two ladies were extremely close friends, neither wanting anything bad for the other, but it was the emperor himself who manipulated both of them for his own agenda. Those flashbacks gave us an entirely different idea of who the real antagonist is and completely changed the two main ladies' relationship. THAT is how the audience's understanding of the plot and novel can be used to change the entire story. We dont get such here though

Some things that were brought to light during tommy being dead/revived:

Dream is capable of reviving people infinitely

This was already implicated and assumed. The book dream has being a means of reviving people has been around Technically since schlatt's death. This just 'confirmed' what was known

Time works differently/feels longer in the afterlife

This doesnt really impact much beyond emotions and implications. If we had more insight into what the 'afterlife' is like beyond nothingness perhaps so. But really it just makes it so wilbur being dead for what feels like 9 years and tommy having been dead for 2 months appeal to emotions.

Wilbur is evil

This one fuckin sucks i cant lie HSKSHSISSGEGDV. Like i was gon go on bout it and i will but it jus sucks. We have nothing to go on besides tommy's word, no examlles of what Horrible things wilbur said could make tommy assume this, etcetc. Ill most likely make a seperate post on how this feels like we're just going to get 'wilbur is a horrible villain' type with him. But still. I feel wilbur Not Being Good isnt a new development.

Dream is going to revive wilbur

This doesnt feel new either, part because phil had wanted to revive wilbur before (ill get to that more later) and that tommy had kept dream alive/initially imprisoned him with the idea of him reviving wilbur.

Dream believes wilbur will break him out of prison

Okau this makes no sense to me actually. I cwnt understand How exactly wilbur would be able to do this? Or why dream believes he even Could? Mans been dead for like 9 years and all we Know of the afterlife is that its black... nothingness. How would 9 years of that make wilbur capable of busting the prison open?

So. Yeah. All in all this plotline hasnt done anything new, developed things, or altered people's perceptions. We just ended up back at square one. Back to tommy being traumatized, dream being 'evil' and horrible and doing villain monologues, and them being stuck together.

Other characters and plotlines

Im pretty damn sure tommy's revival fucked up a LOT of other characters' plotlines and potential development. Honestly i feel this has a lot to do with the writers not communicating with other ccs well enough. But Ill talk about specific characters from least to most fucked over in my opinion:

Sam

He's the best off. He hqd been there during tommy's death, had been close to tommy, had majorly blamed himself and his own mistakes for tommy's death. His grief and self hatred was actually really heartbreaking and well done. The attached character of Sam Nook being unaware of tommy's death and simply waiting for tommy to return was a really good parallel to sam's own grief and anger. like it really snapped sam the guy who cares for tommy and wants to do Right by him back together with him as the Warden of the prison. Mixed personal life with 'just business'.

I feel it wouldve been nice to have him like. Have more time to grieve properly and come to terms eith tommy's death and his own involvement/influence over the events. Him finding tommy alive again Could be a means of him like. Facing his own grief head on if done well.

Ranboo

Mostly in the context of him and sam's argument do i feel it got screwed over. The weight of them yelling at each other and trying to find who to blame and the implications that Maybe ranboo was the one who caused the security breach that closed down the prison on tommy just.... doesnt hit so hard anymore. Because how can there be blame and arguments and a 'who done it' mystery when tommy popped up all fine again?

Puffy

I dony know much of her involvement or how she found out tommy died (besides metagaming shhhhh) but i saw her monologuing of how they 'failed' tommy and like. Her whole 'he was so young we the Adults failed him' spiel is like........... inconsequential? Now??? Like no dont worry he died but hes alright now.

Philza

BET YOU DIDNY EXPECT TO SEE THIS FUCKER!!!!!! But actually though i want to talk bout how this ties into phil. A LOT. for Zalbr ❤. But also because i see ppl tying phil to tommy's death n like nah shutup u doin it wrong. Ill go off more in a Wilbur Post. But essentially: i dont like that dream is now going to revive wilbur. I feel they arent going to tie philza into this Despite phil having originally been trying to revive his son and studying on it and Attempting and Failing. But now suddenly dream can just. Say some magic words and Poof wilbur lives? So we're just going to Kill philza's revival attempts plotline and leave that hanging? This made his efforts seem pointless and Wack like oh why didnt you just Say The Magic Words phil????

Niki

I feel really bad for niki. She hasnt been able to do a lore stream during tommy's 'death' (she tweeted she wanted to but her computer wasnt working) and considering her entire character.... that shit is important. We seen it with Jack Manifold how tommy's death impacted Him considering he literally wanted tommy dead. And since niki is in a similar boat to jack of trying to kill tommy and it being her Only goal...... thats extremely important.

BUT. i feel there wasnt any communication. Did she or anyone even know tommy would be revived? Did no one consider they could At Least let her do a single stream on it? Like jack manifold????

We couldve gotten a Really good niki lore stream. I genuinely was so excited for it and i dont regularly watch her. But we seen it with jack manifold which is why i dont feel he got screwed because mans genuinely did So Good he could pop off with anything n i think it works in His favour. But now........ for niki. Canonically she never even knew tommy was Dead. So its like nothing even happened for her. Is she just supposed to continue on trying to kill tommy with no progression?

What i think would work

This is more me being like 'hey @ the dsmp writers let me in' type speculation sbosegussgs. But i was thinkin on a Really easy way to 'fix' this without rewriting lore and the streams.

Dream should kill tommy again now that he's been revived and Leave Him Dead.

More development for the characters who are affected by his death Especially niki. More time for grief and self reflection and development

A chance for the audience to figure out what the 'afterlife' really is.

Dream is supposed to be smart and a master manipulator or something right? Why doesnt he use being able to revive tommy as a bargaining chip with sam for his own freedom?

The audience would now Know dream's intentions with tommy better, that this death isnt 'final', but we could still see other characters' grief and reactions and coping without it feeling cheap. Ive seen some 'but people dont know tommy is alive so hes still dead in their mind' but that sucks imo.

We'd know more on dream's ability to revive people and that he can just Do It on a whim (which i think sucks but hey im trying) but no one else would know this canonically

Okay. Im done. If you read this. Thankyou. I love you. Hmu.

[silvysartfulness]

xiao xingchen's mental state is So Terrible

Request: Can we see Xiao Xingchen’s thoughts on near suicide? Abandonment? Betrayal? He’s defined himself by other people for most of his life - his master, his totally-not-soulmate Song Lan, and his murder-soulmate Xue Yang. To be left by one person and then to be betrayed by another must be … a lot. Does Xingchen think he betrayed Song Lan because Xue Yang killed Song Lan’s people?  He hasn’t had any time to deal with it, because he’s been playing babysitter… and then saving his pet murderer, too.  Because I’ve put a lot of thought into this, but my writing skills are about 0, and you are so good at angst.

Okay! I’ll just… stream of consciousness on this. Because there is a lot to say about Xiao Xingchen’s mental state, his sacrifices, his losses and his choices.

There’s definitely a lot of touching on these issues currently in Heaven Has A Road. The callback to Xiao Xingchen’s suicide, and the way both Xue Yang and Song Lan fear the worst when he takes off on his own.

The kicker is that Xiao Xingchen himself doesn’t realize. Doesn’t realize that they worry about that, or why they would. He may still be very much prone to self-sacrificial and reckless decisions for the sake of others, but he’s not actively suicidal or seeking to self-harm now, at least not in such a direct and physical way.

But of course it’s a theme very much hanging in the air.

To look back at canon; Xiao Xingchen is, I think, naive even by Celestial Mountain standards. The previous two of Baoshan Sanren’s disciples who left the mountain either went dark (it’s just vaguely hinted at, but clearly it Was Not Pretty) or was a rather mischievous trickster (shaving off Lan Qiren’s beard for being a rule-obsessed square).

There is a spiritual concept of “going into the world” or “leaving the world” respectively - leaving is what Baoshan Sanren did, letting go of attachment to worldly matters to retreat to her unnamed mountain and cultivate immortality. What Xiao Xingchen does is the opposite - he chooses to “enter the world”, to leave that detached existence behind to get involved in earthly matters - beautifully alluded to by the “chen” in his name, meaning (worldly) dust. (That choice is what Xue Yang curses him for during their confrontation that last day - “If you don’t understand the world, you shouldn’t have come! Why didn’t you stay on your mountain?!” )

But he makes that choice. He wants to help people, make a difference, and so he leaves his family behind, makes that sacrifice even knowing that it means he won’t ever see his home again, and descends into the world.

Xiao Xingchen is described as gentle but determined, not only physically fighting and vanquishing evil, but helping people with any ”difficult matter” they bring before him, never refusing anyone. He wants to do good; what’s good for any humble person, not just the mighty few. And for all that he is naive, Xiao Xingchen is also self-assured and uncompromising. He knows what he is striving for, and he doesn’t hesitate when it comes to putting thought into action.

And down in the world, he finds someone else who puts those ideals over the blood ties of the mighty clans - Song Lan. Zichen. They grow close, they talk about starting a sect together – between the lines that means spending the rest of their lives together, living for those shared ideals. They grow so close, people always mention them together.

And then Xue Yang happens. Something so corrupted and grisly, it shakes even this extremely powerful young cultivator.

Whether you go by novel or series canon, the way the rest of the world handles the aftermath of the Chang massacre, it clearly dents Xiao Xingchen’s trust in the sects, in society and its concept of ”justice” quite badly.

And then Baixue happens, as a direct consequence of them capturing and making enemies with Xue Yang. Xue Yang specifically tells Song Lan, ”Tell Xiao Xingchen this is a gift for him!”

So yes, I think Xiao Xingchen takes the full blame of the Baixue massacre upon himself, because Xue Yang was out to hurt him. But because he and his immortal master were out of reach, Baixue paid the price. Song Lan paid the price.

So he broke his vow never to return home, and he gave up his eyes, in a hopeless bid to repair some modicum of the damage he’d caused, to at least give Song Lan his sight back, if not his home, his family, his ideals and beliefs and and hope.

At some point in that aftermath, Song Lan did blame Xiao Xingchen and told him they should never meet again, and he took that to heart, too. Of course Song Lan wouldn’t want to see him again – what is he now, but a reminder of those losses? The losses his own hubris caused?

So he wrapped up Shuanghua and went nameless into the world, avoiding attachments, described as wandering aimlessly from place to place to offer help and then move on, to make sure no one else would be hurt because of him. (That Xue Yang wouldn’t hurt anyone else because of him.)

I wrote a passage about him thinking back on this in an upcoming chapter;

I tried being no one, he thought, unbecomingly bitter and hurting. To make sure people wouldn’t get hurt because of me again. I thought I succeeded, but I ended up hurting people, killing people with my own hands instead.

He studiously tried tuning out the somewhat uneven footfalls behind them, focused wholly on the hand in his.

I tried being nothing, after that, after learning the truth.

But people had died because of him all the same, even then, even with him gone. The last survivors of the Chang, the people of Yi City, all those nameless victims whose blood had paid for the spells to drag him back into the world of the living… A-Qing.

I won’t hide away again, he thought, setting his jaw. I have to try… Try to be something. To do something. To leave a legacy better than this. To make it all worth it, make sure all this suffering wasn’t for nothing.

It was a bitterness that his hopes of doing that, the chance to realize the purpose he so desperately clung to… came at the hands of the man whose shadow had haunted him into nameless exile and caused all that grief and death in the first place.

How much time Xiao Xingchen had to think about all this varies wildly between CQL-canon and MDZS-canon – in the novel, not a whole lot of time passes between the Baixue massacre and Xiao Xingchen meeting a-Qing and eventually Xue Yang. But in CQL, the Baixue massacre takes place before Sunshot, before Yiling Laozu claims the Burial Mounds, before Nightless City and Wei Wuxian’s death… it’s been years of wandering alone before Xiao Xingchen meets a-Qing, and then Xue Yang. I’m not sure if it’s stated how long the Sunshot war is in CQL-canon, but even only going by the things we do know – Yanli having a child, Wei Wuxian having been dead for 16 years at the end of the Yi City arc where the main events took place 10 years ago, it’s anywhere between seven to some ten years.

So I think he has had a lot of time to reflect on all that grief from the past, but that it’s really just been spirals of hopelessness, never really processing or moving on from it. Shuanghua is still wrapped up when he meets a-Qing. He doesn’t introduce himself by name. It’s her shameless happiness, her choice to seek out his company – oh, how he’s ached for connection! - that finally gets him smiling again.

And once he makes friends with the odd stranger whose life he saves… He smiles. He laughs. They all build a home together. Shuanghua is no longer hidden. At the market, the stranger casually calls him by his name.

I think it’s only once they settle down in Yi City that he really begins healing from the horrors of the past. Dares start to build something new, in a tiny little backwater at the very edge of the map. Surely Xue Yang’s shadow won’t reach him, and this humble little existence he’s building here?

So of course it utterly breaks him when the truth comes out. Not just one, but awful truth after awful truth, tearing apart everything he’s built, everything he thought he had – everything he’s done.

A-Qing lied to him about being blind. His ”friend” was Xue Yang all along. He’s been tricked into killing people. He was tricked into killing Song Lan.

The character songs of the Yi City arc lean very heavily into Buddhist rather than Daoist themes – which is super interesting! - but especially the concept of karmic justice. No matter how unaware Xiao Xingchen was of it, he has killed. Not only did he turn away from cultivating immortality a long time ago – his soul is tainted forever. Gu Cheng speaks of ”debts” that can’t be repaid, falling into karmic sin. This isn’t just about tricking him into doing nasty things which leaves him horrified – he has been spiritually destroyed, and he didn’t even know.

The line of Gu Cheng that cuts the deepest is perhaps ”it was not your fault”/ ”The guilt doesn’t lie with you.”

Because that, I think, is at the core of things when Xiao Xingchen reaches for Shuanghua that day in Yi City - that he feels that it does. That it’s all his fault.

He has lost everything. He let down and/or was betrayed by everyone he knew. Killed his beloved soulmate. He himself is tainted and ruined beyond all salvation, because of what he’s done. And so he doesn’t just kill himself, he destroys himself, kills his body and shatters his soul, beyond all hope for reincarnation and rebirth. He utterly and completely ends himself, ends everything that is and was Xiao Xingchen.

Which is heartbreaking beyond words, and also why Heaven Has A Road clearly needed to happen. D:

…

I hope this was at least in the ballpark of the kind of rambling you were hoping for. XD

[aphrodisians]

◜     choi  yerim  ,  ciswoman  ,  twenty .     ◞     ┈     through     her     all     -     seeing     crystal     ball,     [     𝚁𝙴𝙳𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝙳     ]     has     her     winking     eye     trained     on     hestia     jones.     the     ever - enigmatic     fifth     year     is     infamous     for     her     righteous     ways,     but     something     new     seems     to     be     weighing     our     resident     au     courant     down.     a     rumor     is     spreading     through     these     ancient     halls     like     fiendfyre,     &     even     their     erudite     face     can't     save     them     from     the     flames.     she     can     try     to     drown     out     their     sorrows     to     the     tune     of     goddess,     but     xana     can't     fix     everything     ⏤     much     less     something     as     grim     as     [     𝚁𝙴𝙳𝙰𝙲𝚃𝙴𝙳     ].     but     ten     points     to     ravenclaw     for     trying.

hey  besties <3  i’m  cc  &  i’m  super  excited  2  be  here!  i’m  writing  your  local  hater,  hestia  jones,  who  i’ve  actually  never  written  before  but  i’m  really  excited  for  her.  anywhomstdve,  i’d  love  to  plot  w  all  of  you  &  i’m  ecstatic  for  this!

⠀ ⠀ ﹟𝐚𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐬.⠀ ⠀

an  accidental  crack  of  a  book  spine  that  echoes  throughout  an  otherwise  silent  library,  never  letting  anything  pass  you  by  –  never  letting  yourself  be  unaware,  unwelcome  surprises  that  you  greet  with  flushed  cheeks  and  clenched  fists,  a  collection  of  skirts  stolen  from  a  mother  that  has  seemed  to  have  forgotten  you,  bruises  forming  next  to  the  scrapes  on  almost - broken  knees,  passing  tears  off  as  just  ‘my  eyes  are  sweating’  &  heavy,  heavy,  bags  underneath  eyes  that  just  never  seem  to  sleep.

⠀ ﹟𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐝𝐲

birth  name.    jeong  hyun - ae nickname(s)  /  alias(es).    hestia  jones. preferred  name.    hestia  jones,  only  hyun - ae  to  family  +  very  close  friends age  +  dob.    twenty  +  dec.  23 hometown.    belfast,  ireland blood  status.    half  -  blood house.    ravenclaw activities.    fifth  year  prefect,  ravenclaw  chaser,  chess  +  duelling label.    au  courant  –    aware  of  what  is  going  on;  well  informed ethnicity.    korean nationality.    irish gender.    cis  woman pronouns.    she  +  her face  claim.    choi  yerim

⠀ ⠀ ﹟𝐛𝐮𝐢𝐥𝐝.⠀ ⠀

height.    five  feet,  seven  inches  /  170cm tattoos.    none piercings.    earlobes  only scars.    a  two  cm  line  that  lays  horizontally  above  her  left  eyebrow  from  falling  off  her  broomstick  during  her  third  year  at  hogwarts hair.    never  dyed,  meticulously  taken  care  of  but  rarely  styled.  naturally  falls  straight  and  is  often  left  down eyes.    round  and  dark,  accompanied  often  by  dark  bags  underneath  and  an  absence  of  makeup usual  expression.    stressed.  just  like,  if  you  look  at  her  you  can  tell  she’s  going  through  it  (  and  has  been  for  like  the  past  three  years  ),,,  she  needs a  break  but  she  will  not  be  getting  one  <3 distinguishing  features.    cheeks  that  always  seem  to  be  flushed  a  rosy  hue  of  pink,  bags  underneath  her  eyes  that  are  haphazardly  covered  with  fake  glasses or  makeup,  brown  -  hued  hair  that  just  always  falls  correctly

⠀ ⠀ ﹟𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧.⠀ ⠀

( + )  positive.    erudite,  bluestocking,  intuitive,  heedful ( - ) negative.    righteous,  hubristic,  zealous,  moralistic natal  chart.    triple  capricorn,  pour  one  out mbti.    istj  -  a,  investigator moral  alignment.    neutral  good godly  parent.    athena languages  spoken.    korean  +  english likes.    quiet  -  the  kind  of quiet  that  comes  only  in  the  early  hours  of  the  morning  +  in  restricted  access  zones  where  it’s  close  to  silence  (  but  not  quite  ),  victory  in  all  forms,  feeling  appreciated  tbh,  sleeping  but  genuinely  hasn’t  gotten  a  good  night  of  sleep  in  years,  the  color  yellow,  scarves  that  are  long  enough  to  wrap  her  entire  head  <3,  being  a  hater dislikes.    attention  (  though  she  is  overjoyed  /  obsessed  with  winning  ),  losing  -  a  notoriously  sore  loser,  being  out  of  control  in  any  situation  -  even  if  she  can  have  no  humanly  control  over  it,  nail  polish  (  because  she  bites  her  nails  :/  ),  actually  reading  i’ll  be  honest,  staircases quirks.    as  mentioned  above,  bites  her  nails  often,  doodles  when  stressed  (  which  is  all  the  time  )  -  is  halfway  decent  at  it  too  thanks  to  all  of  the  practice,  can  fall  asleep  in  two  seconds  if  given  the  opportunity,  taps  her  foot  a  lot hobbies.    being  a  hater,  being  obnoxious  enough  to  have  attention  (  aka  dramatic  )  n  then  having  the  audacity  to  complain  about  the  stress

⠀ ﹟𝐝𝐨𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐞𝐫

when  he  meets  your  mother,  he  tells  you  it’s  like  the  world  stopped  turning.  she  was  enchanting,  he  says,  like  a  rose  blooming  in  the  dead  of  winter,  a  blossom  of  red  among  a  blanket  of  white  -  and  he  swears  that  he  has  never  loved  anyone  more.  their  romance  is  swift,  a  bouquet  of  flowers  traded  for  an  engagement  ring  and  a  passionate  kiss  exchanged  for  the  start  of  a  family.  your  father  never  says  anything  bad  about  your  mother,  raising  you  on  his  own  with  a  faint  line  on  his  ring  finger.  she  will  be  back  soon,  he  says  with  glazed  eyes  and  love-flushed  cheeks  that  you  seem  to  inherit.  she  will  come  back  soon,  he  tucks  you  in  with  a  faraway  look  on  his  features  and  you  realize  with  a  ceiling  full  of  glow-in-the-dark  stars  that  he  isn’t  okay.  but,  you  hold  his  hand  when  crossing  the  streets  with  you  leading  and  you  let  him  dawdle  about  your  mother  and  you  pat  the  top  of  his  head  when  he  falls  asleep  waiting  for  your  mother.  she’ll  be  back,  he  says,  unaware  that  she  only  visits  when  he’s  not  around.  she  will  come  back  soon,  he  waits  for  her,  a  stranger  in  his  own  body.

you  yearn  for  control  the  way  your  peers  yearn  for  freedom.  freedom,  you  have  enough  of,  but  everything  in  your  life  is  just  out  of  reach.  for  your  entire  childhood,  you  grasp  at  everything  and  nothing,  your  fingers  brushing  past  the  things  you  desire  most.  you  are  a  young  girl  with  magic  in  your  blood,  but  you  watch  from  the  end  of  your  driveway  as  life  seems  to  spin  so  wildly  out  of  control.  your  father  isn’t  okay,  but  you  don’t  understand  why.  your  mother  comes  around  wearing  guilt  like  one  wears  a  birthmark  and  you  can’t  fathom  why.  you  are  left  alone  on  playgrounds  and  with  scrapes  on  your  knees  and  people  whisper  about  you  but  you  don’t  understand  why.  life  goes  on  with  or  without  you,  and  you  think  it  unacceptable.  it’s  infuriating  being  in  the  backseat,  unable  to  control,  unable  to  know.  when  a letter  falls  into  your  hands,  you  swear  to  use  it  to  your  advantage.  you  refuse  to  ever  be  in  the  dark  again.

you  arrive  on  your  own,  a  year  older  than  your  peers,  a  sheltered  girl  from  a  muggle  world  and  you  look  around,  determined  to  change  your  life.  it’s  obvious  to  anyone  early  on  that  you’re  a  bright  girl,  ambition  tied  into  your  intelligence,  potential  pouring  over  every  single  one  of  your  edges.  for  a  while,  it  comes  easily.  you  know  things,  you  understand  things;  most  of  all,  you  learn  how  terribly  things  can  go  wrong.  you  swear  to  never  let  that  happen  to  you,  but  of  course,  life  has  bigger  plans  for  you.  the  first  few  years  fly  by  quick  and  your  hands  build  up  a  reputation  that  you’re  eager  to  upkeep.  you  wipe  the  sweat  off  of  your  palms  onto  your  skirts,  you  might  use  magic  to  make  sure  your  hair  always  looks  good,  you  always  know  the  latest  news,  you  always  pass  your  classes.  then,  you  go  home  during  your  third  year  to  an  empty  house  and  your  father  is gone.

when  you  return  after  the  winter  holidays,  it’s  obvious  that  something  is  -  wrong,  but  you  do  your  thing  and  you  pretend  everything  is  okay.  your  mother  in  all  of  her  magic  and  love  writes  you  a  letter,  telling  you  that  you’ll  be  in  her  care  and  that  only  stresses  you  out  more,  giving  you  gray  hair  and  bags  underneath  your  eyes  that  never  seem  to  away  from  that  point  on.  every  blink  is  heavier  now,  every  sliver  of  information  repeated  as  least  three  more  times,  everything  you  learn  adds  a  little  more  weight  to  your  shoulders.  but  you  soldier  on.  you  become  more  and  more  high  strung,  more  sharp,  more  wretched  with  stress  that  shouldn’t  be  yours  to  shoulder.  you  are  still  an  intelligent  girl,  still  a  bright  witch,  still  gleaming  with  potential;  but  you  almost  permanently  look  like  you’ve  been  handled  an  impossible  task  and  worse,  you  wear  your  flushed  cheeks  almost  as  your  father  did,  a  fact  that  you  dislike  whenever  you  see  yourself  in  the  mirror.

⠀ ﹟𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬

⠀ ⠀  ﹟𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧.⠀ ⠀ has  a relatively  tough  exterior,  but  wow,  words  hurt  and  hestia  is  a  lot  more  sensitive  than  she  cares  to  admit.  say  one  off  thing  about  her  and  she’ll  be  all  “i  can’t  stand  it  here!”  and  storm  off  angrily,  but  she’s  really  just  gonna  go  cry  in  the  owlery  and  talk  to  the  owls  as  if  they  can  understand  her  through  her  snot  bubbles.

  ⠀ ⠀ ﹟𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧.⠀ ⠀ is  this  genius  of  a  witch,  right,  but  is  the  messiest  person  ever.  her  area  in  her  dorm  is  just  .  .  .  yeah,  it’s  messy.  she  comes  to  the  library,  throws  seven  books  down,  loses  ten  pages  of  notes;  is  disorganized  and  completely  messy,  but  at  least  she  always  looks  put  together.

  ⠀ ⠀ ﹟𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧.⠀ ⠀ coming  right  off  of  the  last  one,  because  she  cares  most  about  her  image  +  her  reputation  than  she  does  anything  else,  mostly  because  it’s  all  that  she  thinks  she  has.  so,  yeah,  she  may  be  consistently  stressed  out  and  on  the  brink  of  a  breakdown,  but  at  least  she  looks  GOOD.

  ⠀ ⠀ ﹟𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧.⠀ ⠀ her  style  is  a  little   .  .  .  amateur,  if  i’m  being  honest. very  season  one  rachel  berry.  always  looks  in  uniform  even  if  she’s  out  of  uniform  and  it’s  because  she  has  no  personality  than  being  a  ravenclaw  prefect  idk  what  you  want  me  to  tell  you.  she  has  never  been  normal  once.

  ⠀ ⠀ ﹟𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧.⠀ ⠀ i  laugh  and  kid,  but  she’s  genuinely  a  genius.  might  have  a  bit  of  dyslexia,  but  is  just,,,  a  smart  kid.  also  makes  it  her  entire  personality  though,  so  i’m  not  sure  what  to  do  about  that.

 ⠀ ⠀ ﹟𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧.⠀ ⠀ also,  not  to  be  That  Girl  that’s  so  quirk  n  clumsy,  but  hestia  is  always  injured.  not  gravely,  but  a  scrape  on  her  knee,  a  cut  on  her  cheek,  tape  around  her  fingers,  etc.  etc.  she’s  a  problem,  to  say  the  least,  and  always  hastily  takes  care  of  herself  (  aka,  cleans  it,  leaves  it  ).

 ⠀ ⠀ ﹟𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧.⠀ ⠀ in  general,  is  a  hater,  but  is  so  STRESSED  from  having  a  #missing  father  that  she’s  just  like  :|  in  every  situation.  i  wouldn’t  call  her  awkward  per  se,  but  she  definitely  just  says  what  she  wants  when  she  wants  cause  there’s  “no  point  in  quieting  myself  for  someone’s  comfort”  idk?

⠀ ⠀ ﹟𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧.⠀ ⠀ in  MY  canon,  hestia  actually  conjures  up  a  fox  patronus,  but  it’s  non  corporeal  for  now  simply  because  she  literally  cannot  focus  long  enough  to  cast  the  charm  correctly  –  in  fact,  a  lot  of  her  magic  has  been  suffering  for  the  past  few  years  due  to  her  stress,  something  that  really  only  stresses  her  out  more  rip  in  pieces.

⠀ ﹟𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝  𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬

academic  rival:   personally,  i’d  love  for  someone  who’s  just  naturally  good  at  academia  to  be  her  rival,  like  the  person  who  doesn’t  study  and  “doesn’t  care”  but  always  just  manages  to  beat  her  in  scores;  yeah,  i  think  that’d  be  fun  to  watch  her  spontaneously  combust.

significant  annoyance:  someone  who  really  just  is  the  person  to  tell  hestia  she’s  wound  up  too  tight  all  the  time  and  tries  to  get  her  to  live  her  life,  but  she  just  sees  them  as  someone  who’s  ANNOYING  HER  because  maybe  her  entire  life  is  being  uptight,  ever  think  of  that?  rabastan

quidditch  rival:  because  quidditch  is  really  the  only  time  she  lets  her  hair  down  per  se,  this  rivalry  is  more  friendly  than  it  is  serious like  the  academic  rival,  but  there’s  still  a  lot  of  trash  talk  involved  and  meet  ups  in  the  corridors  to  talk  shit  <3

best  friend:  the  one  person  who  she’s  like  .  .  .  super  grateful  for  because  they’re  always  there,  no  matter  what  she  goes  through  or  does  to  them  through  her  stress  induced  breakdowns.  you  know.  they’re  bffs  and  always  eat  together  and  spend  time  together  n  gossip�� together.  eloise

tutee:  someone  that  either  hestia’s  offered  to  help  or  has  been  forced  to  help,  either  way,  she’s  as  strict  as  any  professor  and  takes  her  job  completely  seriously.  as  in,  will  approach  them  in  the  great  hall  and  ask  if  they’ve  done  the  work  they’re  supposed  to  do.

stress  reliever:  imagine  this  -  hestia  comes  up  to  your  muse  and  is  like  we  need  to  talk,  but  they  just  find  a  nice  seat  underneath  one  of  the  archways  and  talk  into  the  night,  they  make  hestia  laugh,  hestia  makes  them  laugh,  they  have  flushed  cheeks  by  the  end  of  it  and  she  doesn’t  speak  to  them  otherwise.  xenophilius 

their  biggest  anti:  ur  muse’s  #1  hater???  hestia  jones  <3  why?  probably  because  they’re  better  than  she  is  and  she’s  a  nightmare  of  a  person  so  it’s  just  her  being  their  biggest  anti,  probably  runs  a  hate  account  dedicated  toward  them  tbh  <3  rodolphus

The  Ex:  you  know.  the  ex.  didn’t  end  the  way  they  wanted  it  to  so  there’s  A  Lot  There.  longing  glances,  awkward  bumps,  lots  of  what-ifs  .  .  .  a  lot  of  sad  headcanons,  a  lot  of  wholesome  headcanons.  yeah

like  family:  just  someone  who  hestia  is  so  comfortable  with  that  it  feels  like  they’re  family.  and  by  family,  i  mean  like  the  kind  to  tackle  her  on  sight  just  for  fun,  the  sort  to  tease  her  and  make  everyone  believe  it’s  her  birthday.  you  know?

also  a  barely  filled  tag  here  n  anything  u  can  possibly  brainstorm  i’d  love  <3  thank  u  love  u 

[ravenclaw-questions-gone-writing]

Outline # -1 Abandoned Lore (Trinity)

@fanfics-and-fangirling

I have learned my lesson, I will be writing these on Google docs and then copy-pasting onto Tumblr. While I am on GD, I figured I might as well open the docs I used to write the actual fic. Man, I went through a ton of hoops to get where I am. I will be using the most coherent ones for reference. 

I can literally track my thought process as I went through writing all the different versions and I still have no idea how tf I went from this to dropping a flaming papermache whale on Ra’s Al Ghul. And I will die mad about it. Which means more meticulous notes in the future I guess.

Also, I’d like to apologize for how long it took to get this out, I have no sense of time whatsoever and as always, there’s a lot more than expected. This was 7 pages long

Original Ramble Post 

Like most of my stories, the MC is an OCI - reincarnator brought into a fictional world they once watched. (Because I am obsessed with that trope.)

I now find the original name I had for her cringy and out-of-place given these are norse gods. So, from now on her name is Lokka, which is the female version of Loki

There’s a whole ass backstory about the transition of godly names and power I won’t go into. Just think Thor and female Thor kind of thing I guess. She’s basically seen as a spare Loki but it’s also a respected position.

Was tempted to name her Sigyn since Marvel doesn’t care about actual norse myth relations. No, Idc that there’s a canon Sigyn.

If you’re curious, the original name was Aradia. Yes, like the queen of witches.

MC is an asgardian, the daughter of the librarian in the royal palace and a blacksmith

She managed to get an apprenticeship under Loki and is occasionally taught by Frigga. She also learns under Eir when both her royal teachers are busy.

Lokka found her way into the central plane, probably having found it’s location from Loki’s notes and is unaware that it’s unstable.

So, Lokka is in the central plane, having the time of her life exploring new lands when she stumbles across a crying Marinette who is very lost 

Unlike Lokka, Marinette does not know where she is or what is going on. She literally just tripped into a portal and has no way home.

Lokka takes Marinette under her wing and promises to help her find a way home

Problem is, she doesn’t know which of the three universes Marinette is from.

Even if/when she finds out that the girl is from MLB-verse, she still wouldn’t know which one that is because she has no reference to which world is which. Only that Marinette is probably not from Asgard.

At this point, she is unaware she lived in Marvel, she just knows Asgard is Norse Mythology.

So they continue to wander the central plane, Marinette ends up picking up a card guardian for a pet, accidentally becoming a cardcaptor. 

Marinette has trouble pronouncing Lokka and Lokka gives Mari permission to call her Cosette (pre-reincarnation name)

Meanwhile, Ra’s sends Damian and Talia into the Central plane for combat experience and resource gathering.

Ra’s might be 700 years old, he might have access to the Central plane but he sure doesn’t know about magic or how it came to be or the current state of it. He might know something’s off because all the inhabitants have been increasingly on edge and the weather’s been stranger than usual but he didn’t deemed it important

Notably, he has never seen anyone other than those who he’d sent in himself in the central planes (CP, from now on bc I am getting tired of typing the entire thing out) so as far as he knows, the CP’s only entrance point is under his control.

Talia and Damian, who’s still going by Hafid, go hunting for resources and training

They separate for a bit for individual hunting/training time

Marinette and Cosette (Lokka) stumble across Damian’s camp

Misunderstandings occur, Damian fights them, more accurately he fights Cosette

Cosette tries to protect Marinette while also making sure not to harm her opponent

It was harder than she expected considering her opponent was a child

Asgardian training pulls through and she is able to do both

Damian’s tied up, Marinette is confused, and Cosette does not want to deal with this

Negotiation time

Marinette can’t speak Arabic, Damian doesn’t know french, and Cosette has all-speak

This means Cosette’s sitting there, having to repeat everything the kids say to each other for translation’s sake

also misunderstandings before the kids realize allspeak is a thing

Cosette is stuck with two kids who don’t like each other, one of which barely puts up with her so she does what most adults do when kids are too troublesome

Distract them: she does magic tricks with actual magic

Damian+Marinette are fascinated, Cosette accidentally gains two magic students 

even though she’s still learning herself and all she has for guidance right now are Loki’s and Frigga’s notes

So, the trio end up travelling together

Damian demands Marinette should at least be able to fight so they train her too

They also figure out that Marinette and Damian’s worlds are not the same.

Cosette drills some value of life, basic morals, and feminism into Damian’s head

Marinette and Damian (Hafid) have trouble pronouncing each other’s names

They chose nicknames for each other from Cosette’s bedtime stories

Marinette is obviously angel or Tenko

Damian is gets Kabane, the name of a half demon

Kabane later changes to Kasane, protective blade

Yes, Cosette was/is a weeb and yes, they still mispronounce names which defeats the whole purpose but at least they kids don’t notice now even if Cosette is cringing every time they

They run into another card guardian and this one goes to Damian.

Cosette does not pout about this, it would be very immature

One training montages, several fights, a couple language lessons, and an abandoned (and Cosette-raided) house later, Cosette gets to the part of Loki’s notes where she figures out that the CP is collapsing in on itself and uh-oh

She tells the kids the gist of it but they’re too smart, ask all the right questions, and end up figuring out the important parts of situation that she’s trying to keep from them

Cosette is both impressed and a little put out, mostly impressed because not only did they figure out extremely complex magic, they also mostly remained level headed.

Marinette wants to rescue the card guardians and for once Damian is backing her up so Coestte gives up the notion of returning home and they go collect the guardians.

Remember, DC and MLB universes are closing in on each other 

MCU is drifting away

If they don’t collect the guardians, Cosette would have the time to just drop them off at their world collection points and head back to hers

After collecting a couple guardians, they end up finding Talia and explain the situation to her.

Talia joins the gang, she may or may not be plotting a marriage

They raid a couple more houses, collect the 54 card guardians, and complete the power transfer ritual (replacing the Yue’s trial because the cards are the guardians)

The cards end up latching onto the three kids. 

Marinette gets the Mistress title, Damian gets Sun Guardian, and Cosette gets Moon guardian.

Originally Cosette was going to be the mistress and Marinette the Moon guardian but because of the way I’ve decided magic works in this world - explaining that will need a whole other post - if Marinette is the moon guardian and gets the Ladybug miraculous, she will - for lack of better word - get sick and possibly die... or not.

Y’know what, it made sense at the time. But now that I think about it, we’re going back to the original idea.

Cosette’s the Card Mistress, Marinette’s the Moon guardian and Damian’s the Sun guardian.

Spoiler alert: that is a plot point for tropes-verse.

The completion of the ritual breaks puts CP deteriorations in high acceleration

Damian and Talia get into their circle, Cosette and Marinette in the other

Damian doesn’t have any cards bc he doesn’t want his grandfather trying to get to them. He and Talia agreed Ra’s would only know about the CP’s destruction. He does, however, have a CP beast that they picked up.

CP beast: magical creature that was born of CP’s magical residue or smth

Damian’s looks like a Teddiursa (Teddy bear pokemon) it is not

They have a notebook from a raided house detailing CP’s deterioration for proof

Cosette goes with Marinette because she can’t make it back to her universe and in the event that Marinette’s also from Cosette’s universe, she won’t be alone

They separate with the promise of meeting again.

At this point, I have had several differing ideas

They all go into DC world because they aren’t sure of Marinette’s world

Child trio goes into MLB world and Talia tells Ra’s Damian died

Everyone goes into MLB and Ra’s finds out about the collapse when he tries going in himself and finds out he can’t and just assumes they died

Y’all, I’m starting to see why I can’t do one-shots…

One of the things I forgot to mention in the rambling post is that while Marvel-verse was pulling away, it also messed with the time regulation thing, a day in the Maribat-verse will

Time in CP was very messed up

Kind of assumed readers could piece it together but I figured might as well make it obvious and straight up say it

MLBU: Cosette and Marinette arrive safely 

Marinette is delivered home and Cosette has to figure something out

They find out Marinette has only been gone for a week

Marinette has some separation anxiety for about three days

Cosette slowly realizing this is an MLB universe and having a crisis

Cosette gets adopted by the Dupain-Chengs and starts working at the bakery

I have not figured out ages for Cosette

MLB goes like most Maribat fics pre-gotham because I’m lazy

Will likely be adjusted if I ever actually write this fic

Except Cosette steps in when things got too far and Paris has 3 heroes

Cosette is the known as the Sorciere or Lokka

Her uniform is just her asgardian armor

Good but misguided Adrien, Cosette probably adopts him too

Love square goes platonic and Cosette is glad this rom-com is over

Magic tutoring continues

Cosette is neutral with Fu and fascinated by the miraculous

You remember those ghost interactions? Those are filtering in

One of the first things to merge is the internet, because it doesn’t have a physical body and it’s just waves of information

News and discoveries between the world are being swapped

Given what I remember from DC and dimension travel, it wouldn’t be surprising if they figured out universes were merging.

The news about JL and Paris’s situation are causing all kinds of confusion

Cosette beings looking for information on Damian

As the physical world begins merging, there’s pockets of space where you can slip from one world into another; not quite portals but close

Eventually the trip to NY became a trip to Gotham because their plane slipped between planes (sorry, I saw the chance and I had to take it.) but yeah, that happened.

There’s quite a few details I’m forgetting

DCU: Damian and Talia arrive ok and report bare basics to Ra’s

It has also only been a week

Ra’s is displeased to find them back until they report the state of the CP

There’s the whole coup not long after and Damian is sent to Bruce

Damian is much more innocent looking when he’s bringing what appears to be a teddy bear with him

It’s name is Abd and it has grown wings by now. Actual name pending.

He gets teased about it, but under Cosette’s teachings, he has learned the virtue of patience, underestimation, and getting revenge with a side of entertainment

He does not try to kill Tim either

He also has to make the choice of bringing Abd with him as Damian or as Robin

He choses to make a side company for WE making toys based off creatures from the CP so Abd wouldn’t look too out of place

It takes two weeks for the bats to realize there’s something off about the Abd

They are convinced it’s haunted and Damian is very entertained

Abd only moves in daytime when no one - Damian excluded - can see it

Movement can expel magic that interferes with recording tech

Alfred is the first to figure it out and surprise, surprise, he has some magic books for Damian to learn from

It’s from the Wayne family library and they just assumed the language was lost to time. At least three are from Alfred’s own family.

Bat brothers spend the next 6 months trying to convince Damian his magical pet bear is a haunted doll.

Damian sort of getting along with Poison Ivy because his Sun magic is very compatible with plants and they love him

On an unrelated note, the plants seem to refuse to attack the new Robin

Damian randomly, unconsciously humming to songs Cosette and Marinette sang

Damian just vibing with the magic users of JL and Teen Titans

No one took him seriously at first but he pointed something out during a conference

“Robin, stand down and let the magic users handle this” - Green Lantern, probably

Constantine who actually knows what he’s talking about “No, no, let the boy talk.”

The plan was twice as efficient after Damian was through with it

Now Constantine’s trying to adopt Damian as an apprentice, he’s failing bc the bats are protective and possessive of what is theirs

Reminder that Damian brings Abd with him everywhere and he’s still getting teased about it from anyone who is not a bat (still convinced the thing is haunted)

The only thing the magic users have picked up about Abd is that he’s a magical construct which could mean a number of things but they brush it off as just a doll.

No one is prepared for the thing to come to life, multiply in size, and start spitting ice, sleep sand, and illusions. (Hiccups bubbles and can also turn into a cloud.)

They are also not prepared for the thing to quadruple in size and for Damian to ride it like a horse into battle. Reminder that Abd has wings and can fly.

Confusing talk about what’s going on in Paris and some other parts of the world

JL slowly figure out the universal merger that Damian already knows about

Damian is not impressed, it took him and Angel about 2 hours as 9 year olds

Somehow, Damian still has the ice prince image, less demon spawn though, that goes to Abd

Time moves on and one day, a plane from the other world arrives in Gotham

There’s a bit of confusion but it’s not exactly the first time something like this has happened at this point

WE steps up and offers jobs and a tour and all the usual Maribat plans (not just for the kids but all the other people on the plane)

Given the merger of the internet, MLB class and crew have some idea who the Waynes are and they accept. 

Estimated about 6 months for full merger so people from MLB world are kinda just stuck there until then

Lila literally cannot lie about knowing the Waynes personally but she sure can lie about other things.

Dick and Damian are sent in to monitor the group

The reunion is awkward given they can’t freely interact and are not supposed to know each other. 

While Dick is talking, there are just wide eyed staring between Marinette, Damian, and Cosette. With something a little extra between Marinette and Damian.

Cosette is torn between laughing and groaning at another rom-com trope coming in fast.

She ends up filming it bc blackmail is always good to have

Adrien is confused and quite frankly, he’s really just there to cover for them

The tour begins and about five minutes in, the trio breaks off and exchanges stories and names.

Cosette hears about Batman and has a dawning realization of what this world is, mentally nopes out, later digests that they are going into Maribat verse

Starts checking off Maribat tropes they’re coming across bc she might as well have fun with it

They continue to meet up

Batfam thinking Damian somehow managed to get two girlfriends

Damian choking on his breakfast when it is brought up

The girls are invited to dinner and Damian is just dying inside

Cosette blatantly hitting on all Damian’s brothers in the first 5 minutes

Damian screaming internally while Cosette cackles

Dick is awkward until he realizes it’s a joke, Jason plays along, Tim has an awkward bean crisis

Tim x Cosette? Maybe.

Cosette does that sit and repeat thing at least three times out of habit

Batfam gets full explanation about how they met and everything

I have played with the idea of Cosette getting fear gassed a couple times and Idk how it would go tbh.

That’s as far as I got with this version, so shenanigans ensue

Pretty sure they used the cards and magic throughout even if I didn’t mention it

Absolutely would be useful for being in two places at once

I later changed so the merger happens and then Paris’s heroes meet the Justice League

Damian immediately recognizing Cosette but not Marinette bc magic

still effective but weaker because of Damian’s magic type

He later recognizes Marinette later when she pulls off a move he taught her way back in CP

Nickname confusion for everyone else

Cosette vs Constantine on who gets to teach Damian magic

Damian goes to Paris. They beat Hawkmoth and then go to Gotham.

Also had a general idea of a plot with LoS that never got fleshed out past existing

If we’re going for the rebound version: Cosette reunites with Thor and Loki during the Avengers movie

Also, poor Heimdallr. He probably had a lot of headaches with the universe crash

Accelerated merger because of the convergence in the dark world.

I wanna go with 2012 Avengers towers shenanigans. + Loki and his sort-of but not really daughter

Cosette vs Antman, shrinking/growing, science vs magic.

And then there’s the whole Ironman vs Batman vs Arrow rich boy fight

Hammer x Luthor or Hammer vs Luthor?

Also, Cosette just staring at her home universe in betrayal and being insulted she didn’t think of it earlier because classic Nordic myths had Loki as Odin’s brother and not his son among other things but still

Fight against Thanos is a bit anti-climatic when you give a gremlin murder child magic and a sword that can through anything, including magical artifacts.

this baby boy can and will fight God and Cosette’s not really the kind to hold him back

If I actually wrote this, a lot of things would probably change because I’d actually have to put more thought into logistics and how things work

[allhailthemightyquattro]

Laura’s Deckerstar Fic Recs (Part 18)

You can find the complete list (minus rec notes) at my Ao3 Bookmark page.

Disclaimer: These recs have no real ranking and are simply being shared in the order in which I bookmarked them. And just because I say more about some than I do others, does not mean that those fics are “better” or that I like them more.

Red-Handed by Storycat9

Rating: Not Rated Status: Complete Word Count: 3,495 (1 chapter) Author’s Summary: The Devil is not in the habit of forgiveness. Returning to the LAPD is not the same as forgiving the Detective. While he wouldn’t admit it to himself or Dr. Linda, Lucifer knows that working with the Detective also allows him to see to her punishment.

Rec Notes: This is one of my favourite examples of season 4 angst. It has a very in-character Lucifer trying to “punish” Chloe by flaunting his relationship with Eve and it fits into canon perfectly. And despite all the angst, the author still manages to effortlessly slip in a family fun day with Lucifer, Chloe and Trixie which highlights the fact that Lucifer very much still loves Chloe and is punishing himself just as much as he is her.

P.S. Although this fic is part of a series, it can easily be read as a stand alone as there aren’t any direct references to its prequel at all.

To All The Griefs I Left Behind by Pokimoko

Rating: Teen Status: Complete Word Count: 44,300 (10 chapters) Author’s Summary: It's been weeks since Lucifer returned from Hell, and Chloe couldn't be happier. They are together and—after so many years of ups and downs—everything is finally perfect. Even if the world seems a bit weirder than usual. Even if the ghosts of Lucifer's past are coming back to haunt him. Even if Chloe feels like she's losing her mind. But it's fine. It's all fine.

Rec Notes: Another angsty one. And I mean really angsty. This is a good one if you are in the mood to cry. It is also highly underrated so I implore you to give it a go and show the author some love.

The Royal Treatment by elleflies

Rating: Mature Status: WIP (last update: 3 March 2021) Word Count: 40,812 (6/9 chapters) Author’s Summary: Chloe and Lucifer aren’t married, but try telling that to the supernatural community of Los Angeles and the infernal plane full of demons ecstatic to see their boss finally tied down, literally or otherwise.

Rec Notes: This is a fake married fic unlike any other. For a start, it’s set when Lucifer is back in Hell after the season 4 finale, so he and Chloe don’t even interact (or at least, they haven’t yet). The fake marriage is the result of a prank by Maze in which she fakes documents, making it seem that Chloe and Lucifer are legally married. Word gets around and before Chloe has a chance to sort things out, the supernatural community starts calling her the Queen of Hell and she sorta has to roll with it. And down in Hell, the demons also learn of the “marriage” and are very eager to throw Lucifer bachelor parties and create gifts for their new Queen, so he too goes along with the rumour. Both Chloe and Lucifer are unaware of what the other is dealing with, and it creates some great parallels.

As hinted at in the summary, this fic has heaps of different mythical creatures (including vampires, pixies and Fae) but they don’t eclipse the story - it’s still very much Deckerstar centric - so don’t worry if you aren’t too into that sort of thing.

Time’s Up by HiroMyStory

Rating: Teen Status: Complete Word Count: 2,025 (1 chapter) Author’s Summary: Lucifer is dying. Chloe will do anything to save him.

Rec Notes: This one isn’t actually in the "Chloe Decker/Lucifer Morningstar” tag... but it’s close enough so I’m still including it in my rec list. It is an alternate take on the season 4 episode “Expire Erect” and it has all the angst and whump you would expect. But its most unique feature is its open-ended ending. It’s so good that I simultaneously want to read a sequel and leave the fic exactly how it is. (Though I actually have started writing a sequel to it which, if I finish it, I might ask the author for permission to post.)

Believer by JCBeckett

Rating: Not Rated Status: WIP (last update: 2 March 2021) Word Count: 129,783 (17/? chapters) Author’s Summary: There are three things Chloe Decker knows: One, she is in love with the Devil. Two, the Devil loves her back (even if he hasn’t said it yet). And three, “celestial craziness” doesn’t even begin to cover what she’s gotten herself into.

Picks up right after the cliffhanger in 5A. Fluff, angst, and shameless amounts of Deckerstar within.

Rec Notes: This is a post-season 5a fic and it incorporates the few behind the scenes details we have been given about season 5b and then carries on to its own action-packed story. It’s super-angsty but balances it out by giving us small break with fluff and humour. I also love the focus on Chloe and Lucifer’s relationship and how they are still dealing with insecurities but ultimately know that they are better together.

P.S. This fic does have ties with the comics but you don’t have to have read them to understand the story (I haven’t read them, and it hasn't affected my enjoyment of the fic in the slightest).

[shortkingzuko]

title: gentle tides

relationship: bato/hakoda, implied bato/hakoda/kya

warnings: mentions of canon-typical violence/death

summary: Like a fish in a gentle current, the thought swims languidly through Bato’s head. I love you, he thinks, I love you.

for @bakodafleetweek  prompt: revelations

read under the cut or on ao3 for the rest of my tags/notes!

Revelations come in many forms. Some come crashing down, like the violent waves that topple boats and drag men to the depths during a storm. Realizations that are sudden and harsh, uncaring of the splintering wood and torn flesh that it leaves in its wake. For all the calmness that descends in the aftermath, the still sea, the silent air, there is still the fallout that must be repaired. The price of understanding in one swift motion, the price of knowing all at once that nothing would be the same again. Bato knows that he paid this price before when he found his brother’s body, singed and blistered, surrounded by pink-tinged snow which was slowly refreezing after a raid. 

 Sometimes understanding is less violent but just as scary. Like a clap of thunder that shakes the earth, makes it feel like the world itself is trying to burrow away from the truth, but is stuck, unable to run or hide. Unsettling, but beautiful in its own way, like swimming in a spring just a few weeks too early in the summer. Bato remembers the realization when it came it him, the sudden understanding of why he hated being compared to his sister, why he stared at men with such envy, why - despite how disrespectful it felt - he felt such pride when everyone told him that he filled the role of big brother so well in his family. A moment that put his whole life into clarity, a moment that gave him his name, let him change his hair. A moment that gave his sister a big brother again. A huge, frightening change, one that, upon reflection, Bato knew for much longer than he acknowledged, that felt so natural, so beautiful, he can scarcely remember why he was ever afraid of it. 

 Bato has grown used to sudden, terrifying moments of understanding. Ones that seem to shake him to his core and leave him guessing, anxious and tense, about the outcomes. There isn’t much in his life that leaves him like that anymore. He’s already lived his fair share of tragedies, at his age of nineteen, has learned to accept the war as the ceaseless machine that it is, has figured out what his place in his village will be, likely until he dies. 

 He’s certainly figured out that despite everything, he is willing to wake up early just to go fishing with Hakoda. And, unfortunately, Hakoda has figured this out too, since he only ever goes up to his best friend when he wants to go out onto the water, even though he’s experienced enough to go alone. 

 Bato stands outside Hakoda’s house, arms crossed and scowling dramatically, just waiting for the moment that Hakoda comes out to greet him. After a few moments, Bato hears shuffling behind the curtained entrance, and then Hakoda’s head pops out, his friend grinning widely when he spots Bato. When he realizes that Bato is frowning, he cackles, earning some grumbled complaints from the inside, which shuts him up pretty quickly. 

 The trek to the coast is quiet as both of them keep knocking into one another to try to get a rise out of the other. The sun is gone from the sky, but soon it’ll just barely be peeking over the horizon, on its lazy travel through the sky before departing quickly after. 

 Getting the boats out onto the water is easy and soon each of them is paddling a kayak, their voices getting louder as they get further away from sleeping families and childing faces. 

 “I don’t see why we can’t just go to a  regular  fishing spot,” Bato complains, mostly for the sake of it. The brisk air has wicked away his sleepiness, and the jokes of his friends - though not very funny - have done wonders at cheering him up. The world around them is blissfully quiet, the sounds of ice cracking, their paddles splashing the water, and their voices are the only sounds that reverberate around them. Bato feels perfectly alone, just him and Hakoda, and the feeling makes his heart quake. 

 “Cause I found a better one,” Hakoda says, the roll of his eyes clear in his voice. He paddles further ahead to lead the way, though never far enough that Bato couldn’t splash him if he wanted. Maybe later. “It’s not that far, you big baby.”

 Bato lets out an exaggerated groan but ceases his arguments. The row for a few more minutes before Hakoda removes his oar from the water, lays it across his kayak and looks back to make sure Bato does the same. When they’re close enough, Hakoda reaches out and grabs the side of Bato’s kayak.

 “The current can take us the rest of the way,” he says, moving his hand from the boat to Bato’s sleeve. He slowly brings them closer together, until both of them have their arms lazily draped into the other's boat, preventing them from getting separated. 

 They alternate between idle chat and pleasant silence as they float, just starting to squint at the rays of light that reflect off the ice around them. Every once in a while, Hakoda will dip a paddle back into the water to direct them away from an icy wall or to try and keep the sun out of their eyes. Eventually, he shrugs and starts grabbing for their line and hooks.

 “Here is close enough,” he says, holding out a hand so that he can tie Bato’s hooks and lie for him too since Bato always says that tying the little notes cramps his hands. 

 Bato passes his kit over, making sure to hold the boats together, though he intentionally rocks Hakoda’s a little bit, earning a glare with pursed lips as Bato laughs. Once the scowl is wiped from Hakoda’s face, he goes back to focusing on their hooks, tongue sticking out from his lips, hair starting to slip from under his hood. Bato tilts his head and watches as the reflection of water illuminates Hakoda’s face, painting his skin a myriad of golden-whites across his dark cheekbones. 

 Bato watches his friend, feels the soft wake of the sea beneath them and something deep in his chest changes, shifts, moves sideways and releases a hidden thought or emotion. It’s unlike anything that Bato has ever felt before. It isn’t the anguished tsunami wave, or the thunderclap, or even the soft drip-drip-drip of everyday realizations, the ones that come when he realizes he forgot to clean his dishes the night before or that he didn’t go up the flaps properly on his boat. It comes like a gentle tide, lapping at the coastline, advancing and receding almost playfully, each push bringing with it a small thread of truth, a memory of Hakoda’s smile, or laughter, his gentleness with others, and his grand schemes. 

 Like a fish in a gentle current, the thought swims languidly through Bato’s head.  I love you,  he thinks,  I love you.

 There is no surprise, no shock, no terror of its coherency. Instead, Bato feels calmed, soothed even, as he watches Hakoda furrow his eyebrows as he ties the last line around a hook, lower it back into the water, before leaning back in his kayak. He turns his head to Bato, his beaded hair falling gracefully from where it’s hidden in his hood. Hakoda smiles lazily at his friend.

 “What’s on your mind?” Hakoda asks, so unaware of the gentle waters that have risen in Bato’s mind. 

 Bato tilts his head, considering for a moment what to do. Hakoda is with Kya, Bato knows that, knows that nothing will get between the two of them. He thinks of Kya’s strong hands, her warm smile, the quirk to her eyebrow when she hears something particularly foolish, and the way that she has always made sure Bato never feels left out when he spends time with her and Hakoda. He thinks of the time all of them have spent together, how Kya has joked (was she really joking, Bato wonders for a moment) about Bato moving in with her and Hakoda once her parents said it was okay.

 “Maybe we’ll even build you your own room if you think you’d rather sleep alone.” She would say, waggling her eyebrows. Hakoda always blushed at her insinuation, and they would all laugh, maybe, just maybe, a little too forcefully. 

 He thinks of Kya and it feels like a pull of the ocean at low tide, a slow, gentle pull back out to sea. Bato thinks that if he doesn’t love Kya yet, that he’ll love her in time. He thinks she’ll be happy about that. 

 He thinks that Hakoda will be happy too.

 Bato smiles softly, gaze soft as he takes in the lines of worry that have taken over Hakoda’s face in his silence. 

 “I think I have something I want to tell you.”

[bewaretheidesofmarchyall]

Hi! I follow you, and you're reblogging a lot of Dream SMP stuff, and I googled what the plot was and I didn't find anything so can you tell me the plot?

Alright

I covered the plot of Season One here:

https://bewaretheidesofmarchyall.tumblr.com/post/635954614437593088/hey-i-really-like-minecraft-and-used-to-watch

So, here’s what happened in Season Two!

Ranboo arrives! He’s half-enderman, he has amnesia, and he’s new in town!

Tommy and Ranboo broke George’s house, which gave Dream a flimsy excuse to build enormous obsidian walls around L’Manburg

In order to get the walls taken down, Tubbo is forced to exile Tommy

So, Tommy is sent away to Logstedshire, and becomes depressed (The fact that Dream shows up every day to destroy his things and emotionally manipulate him doesn’t help)

He comes very close to taking his final canon life, but he realizes what a terrible person Dream had been to him and runs away from Logstedshire to live in Technoblade’s basement

Speaking of Technoblade! He’s getting executed!

The Butcher Army (Quackity, Tubbo, Fundy, and Ranboo) decided that he needed to pay for the whole “releasing withers into the city and leaving into the night” thing

They were unaware that Technoblade had stopped his violent ways and was just living a peaceful retirement in the arctic with his favorite horse, Carl.

So, the Butcher Army shows up and threatens Carl to get Technoblade to follow them back to L’Manburg

They attempt to execute him with an anvil, but unbeknownst to them Technoblade had a totem of Undying

With Dream’s help, he escapes into the night after killing Quackity with a pickaxe.

Techno is greeted with a surprise when he returns home to find Tommy living in his basement. He decides to team up with the kid, and shows him his giant vault of wither skulls with the iconic line “Welcome Home, Theseus”

Meanwhile, the Butcher Army starts planning how to kill Dream at the next festival

Oh! There’s also a giant maximum security prison now!

And a mind-controlling alien parasite called The Crimson!!

There’s a lot of subplots

But we’ll skip to the Green Festival, where Dream does not die

No, the only things that die at that festival are L’Manburg’s chances and Techno and Tommy’s friendship

Basically, Dream blew up the Community House and blamed it on Tommy, then used it as an even flimsier excuse to get Tubbo to surrender the final disc (one of the things Tommy cares about the most in the game)

Tommy, who was watching the entire thing invisibly with Technoblade jumps in and fights with Tubbo, upset that he would even consider handing over his discs

However, he has a moment of self-realization, and he lowers his weapon, telling Tubbo to give up the disc

Despite his words, despite even some of his actions, he’s always going to choose Tubbo.

Tommy leaves Technoblade and joins up with Tubbo again, which Technoblade is obviously not a fan of.

Sadly, once Dream has both discs, there’s no reason for him to keep L’Manburg around, and he tells the crowd that the country will be destroyed tomorrow

They prepare for Doomsday

Dream, Techno, and Phil show up the next day

L’Manburg doesn’t stand a chance

The city is destroyed with withers and replicating TNT, and all that stands is a crater and one flag

That was four days ago

What comes next?

Tommy is still determined to get his discs back, mostly because he needs to focus on that or he’ll have a breakdown

Tubbo is dabbling in mad science, and blames himself. He’s made a new house that could one day become a country of its very own once Dream isn’t around to screw things up. 

It’s called Snowchester

Technoblade is back to vibing in the arctic after destroying a country. Still feels betrayed by Tommy.

Ghost Wilbur was very upset by the destruction of L’Manburg, since he was the one who owned the most stuff there. He wants to be brought back to life, which will be attempted today!

Phil has taken Ranboo under his wing and given him a place to stay, since he helped blow up his old house. Phil is also trying to bring back his son, Wilbur, from the dead.

Ranboo is not doing great, but he’s coping. He has a panic room, and has been needing it a lot lately after he was revealed as a “traitor” (it’s complicated). Currently living in the arctic with Phil and Techno, though that could change.

Quackity still may or may not be possessed (it’s complicated), but he’s cut ties with L’Manburgian government and is really trying to kill off Dream (but with diplomacy)

Fundy is also trying to kill off Dream, after he sabotaged the Anti-Doomsday effort and is having a corruption arc of his own. He and Ranboo are not that good of friends any more.

Niki burnt down the L’Mantree. She’s at an unstable part of her character arc, and isn’t doing great. Currently teaming with Jack Manifold.

Eret is a noble and kind king, and they’re the only one really doing okay here

Jack Manifold went to hell (He got better!), and now wants to take revenge on Tommy.

Callahan mourns the Community House

Sapnap has reconciled with Tommy, and fought on the right side of history for once

I think Punz is still a spy, but I’m not sure about that one

Captain Puffy is alright, I think.

George still wasn’t there for Doomsday

The Crimson grows

And Dream? Dream has finally destroyed L’Manburg. All that’s left for him is to destroy Tommyinnit once and for all.

Everyone on the server wants to kill god (and by god I mean Dream). The only problem is that everyone is really bad at teamwork.

If every person on the server actually works together, I think they can take Dream down and be free to live their own lives, complicated as those may be.

That’s the only hope at this point.

(Finally, Purpled played Bedwars instead of showing up to Doomsday)

If you have any other questions, please ask! I wasn’t able to cover everything that’s happened on this server, so if you want to know more about certain characters or theories, my ask box is always here.

Thanks for reading!

[vigilantesanonymous]

start me up - poe dameron

(Title inspired by The Rolling Stones song. I don’t know why, it just came up on my playlist while writing this and I can just imagine this playing in Poe’s head every time he sees you. Especially the lines “You make a grown man cry, you make a dead man cum”.)

Story inspired by this anon: “think about it: poe meeting you for the first time, you're the best female pilot in the galaxy, oh no, not only are you his runner up but you're also incredibly beautiful and poe is a nervous, stumbling and stuttering mess.”

We love when the man who literally cannot stop talking is at a loss for words! Thank you for the suggestion anon!

Word count: 2736

***

You’re the best pilot in the galaxy. Well, okay, maybe not that. But what you are is the best female pilot in the galaxy. And boy, had you made a reputation for yourself. 

You had been running with a Mandalorian for a while, the two of you racing around the galaxy on bounty hunting missions and experiencing the damage the First Order could cause front and center. At first, you really hadn’t cared to take a side. What was yet another war to you? That was, until your best friend was forced to go into the stormtrooper program, and you never saw him again. That first loss was what really opened your eyes to all the destruction that was taking place in the galaxy. No matter how badly you wanted to keep your head down and turn a blind eye to it, you couldn’t. Everywhere you went you saw the intense amount of damage that the First Order had caused. Broken families, dead bodies, screaming babies looking for parents that would never come to save them again. It was then that you decided you needed to do more than be a measly bounty hunter, and with your expert flying skills the Resistance took you in with open arms. 

To say he heard a lot about you was an understatement. You were his runner up, and people all over the Resistance would tease him about being bested by a girl, but for some reason he didn’t mind. Instead, he was excited to meet the woman who was so incredible at the craft he loved more than anything. He liked the thought of having another skilled pilot on the side of the Resistance. Someone who was just as good as he was to keep his friends safe, someone who would care about the good of the galaxy as much as him. But when he first laid eyes on you? Stars. He didn’t know that being the best female pilot in the galaxy also meant being the hottest.

You had your hair in a half up, the top portion of hair pulled out of your face so there would be no distractions while flying (“Being a pilot isn’t the same as being a beauty queen,” you snark at anyone who asked). Still, it suited you, and the few whips of hair that managed to escape framed your face well. It brought attention to your rosy cheeks and your bright eyes, the eyes Poe couldn’t tear himself away from. 

“Poe Dameron,” he said confidently as he held out his hand. Poe Dameron, best pilot in the galaxy. And it wasn’t just something that he said about himself, no. Everyone touted him as the best, even General Leia Organa, for whom he was the right hand man of. Despite the badass reputation, those were the last words he said to you with any amount of certainty to them. Your hand was soft, but your grip was firm. You introduced yourself, Poe feeling himself melt at the sound of your voice. He hadn’t even realized you asked him a question until you repeated yourself. 

“Oh! Where I’m from? Yavin. Y-Yavin 4,” he stuttered awkwardly. He clunkily tells you about how his parents were in the Resistance, how he has a droid (Seriously, talking about the DROID?, he mentally curses himself). He scours his brain for anything to tell you that won’t make you snore, and surprisingly finds himself at a loss for words. Any questions you ask him are an Olympic feat to answer. He can barely open his mouth without stuttering out a weak reply. A wave of relief washes over him as Rey glides over to introduce herself, gladly letting her do the talking so he doesn’t embarrass himself further. It’s not that he didn’t want to be with you, talk to you, get to know you. But clearly he was not very good at it. No one had ever made Poe stumble over his words like this, or made him so incredibly at a loss for words. He felt as clunky as an outdated sand speeder. 

You liked Poe. He was handsome, sure, but what you found most attractive was the way he cared about his team and friends. The way he took the worries of the war from everyone and put it on his shoulders. The way he hugged his droid whenever the little guy rolled up to his feet, happily beeping at his owner for attention. It was the little things about Poe that made your affection grow towards the man. You were stationed under him, and he was your superior, but Poe never made anyone on the team feel like they were anything but an equal to him. Even with his superstar reputation, you got to see behind the scenes to see a charming man who would do anything for the people that he cared about, and that he loves them fiercely. 

It didn’t take long for you to rise through the ranks on the Black Squadron to be right underneath of Poe. But you couldn’t help but feel like there was a disconnect when it came to you and him. With the rest of the team, he would get really close and personal with them. He had inside jokes with them, his charming grin always readily available to anyone who needed some cheering up. After a mission, he would tell each and everyone how great they’re doing, but when he finally got around to you a strange look would wash over his face and could only stammer out a “Hey, great job kid,” before walking as quickly as he could to Rey and Finn. It was all Poe could do to not stumble over his words when he talked to you. Even after rehearsing them in his mind over and over. Which of course, he would never admit.

Of course he wanted to gush to you about how good of a job you did, how could he not?! And how sexy it was when you took out those Ties in one shot, and the way you were just so good with your X-wing. How courageous and admirable it was for you to take a risk, to risk yourself for others on your team. After a mission, when Snap was the first to congratulate you, and then hug you, well. Poe would be a damned liar if he claimed he didn’t feel a hot flash of jealousy come over him at the sight. But he couldn’t act on whatever this was that he was feeling. No, that would be unprofessional. At least, that’s what he told himself.

But try as Poe might, his feelings progressed. At first for him, it was just a crush. That was all he would allow himself to call whatever feelings he had towards you. You were just a really pretty pilot, and it was a crush, and there was a war to win. He didn’t have time to try to pursue you, or even try to have a relationship. Rey and Finn were exhausted by him talking about how he totally does not have a crush on you, because it seems like anymore you’re all that Poe can seem to talk about. But then you were on a mission and you took out 8 canons on Ren’s fleet all with your first shot at them, one of the shots so well placed that you took out the ship entirely. When you came back to D’Qar, you leaped out of your X-wing almost in slow motion, your hair tumbling out perfectly from your helmet as you pulled it off. The smile that lit up your features was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. And then he was done for. Poe Dameron was undeniably smitten with you. 

To add to the misery that is Poe’s continuing purgatory of pining, Leia had decided to put you as Poe’s second in command. Unbeknownst to him, she had told you of the happy news earlier that day, and allowed you to celebrate. You were getting drunk with a few of your friends, blissfully unaware of anything else going on. It wasn’t until later that the older woman called Poe to her private planning room. Poe happily sped to where she was waiting- he would be lying if he said he didn’t get a boylike joy from being called by name for help from the General. He relished being her right hand man and he would do anything for her. Well, almost anything.

“She’s going to be your second in command,” Leia says, mildly amused at the way that Poe’s dark eyes widen in shock. She, along with everyone else on base, knew how he felt towards you. And that Poe just needed a little push, that’s all. After all, she had been married to none only than Han Solo. She knows how these kinds of men tend to work. 

“M-me?” Poe stammers. He gulps- No, he couldn’t allow it. There was no way that Poe could handle having you under him, having to rely on you constantly for missions or planning. How was he supposed to focus when you got that little crease between your eyebrows when you’re frustrated? Or how your face lights up when you come up with a great solution? His heart was racing a million miles a minute, his hands slick with sweat. He didn’t want to deny the General, but he had to. “I- General, I’m so honored, but I don’t think I can-”

“Can accept? Why, of course you can. I already talked to her about it, and she’s extatic to work with you. She said it would be an honor, Dameron. I can’t disappoint her now, can I?”

“No,” Poe sighs, defeated. 

“Besides, I think you and her would work very well together,” Leia says with a knowing glance. Poe gulps- he knows she knows. “Don’t disappoint me, Dameron.”

“I won’t,” Poe promises.

*

It’s a few weeks after your promotion, and Poe is still a little shaky, but at least now he can say a few sentences without stumbling through them. Mostly. You take the fact that he talks to you at all as a win, because it’s a lot of progress from before. It’s your day off- the base is more quiet than usual. Everyone is sleeping in or lazing around, enjoying the fact that they don’t have to be up at the crack of dawn to work on a mission. You like waking up early though. There’s something about the quiet on base that’s nice, and the stillness of the morning. You feel like you can actually have some time with your thoughts before having to whisk off on another mission for the Resistance. You roam until you find your favorite spot on base, the one that has a little clearing into the jungle. You lean against a pillar, letting yourself get lost in thought as you watch the leaves tumble with the breeze. 

Peace never lasts forever. You’re pulled out of your thoughts by the familiar whirring of a droid. BB-8 rolls to your feet, looking up at you expectantly. He beeps, but you can only understand a little bit of droid language. “Is it about your dad?”

The little droid lets out a series of beeps and whirs before zooming down the hallway. You grin to yourself- you loved to give your commander shit about the way he and his droid adore each other. You break out into a trot, following BB-8 down the hall to the hangar. Now you know why his droid had come to you for help- it looked like he was working on the compressor of his X-wing, but it wasn’t going well. Something was sparking, the smell of smoke hanging in the air from it. A pair of oil stained legs are sticking out from underneath the ship, and a voice stringing more curses than you had heard came from him. 

“You look like you could use some help,” you say as you hear him spit out another profanity in frustration. Tools and rags are littered by Poe’s workspace in disarray. Poe pulls himself out from under the ship, his expression melting from grouchy to happily surprised. 

“Hey!” he grins. 

“Hey yourself, Commander,” you reply. Crouching down, you root around in Poe’s disastrously messy toolbox until you find what you’re looking for, handing it to him.

“U-um, thanks,” he says, but immediately he drops the wrench you found him. 

“Is everything okay?” You ask as you pick up the wrench he just dropped. 

His brain shorts out at the sight of you. How could he not think you’re stunning? You don’t have any makeup on, but the humidity from the jungle planet is giving you a sweaty sheen that makes you just glow. Your cheeks are flushed pink, you have a few strands of hair that refused to stay in your ponytail, and stars it’s all Poe can do to keep from slamming you against the X-wing to make out with you.

“Poe?” you ask again. He still hasn’t given you an answer.

“Yeah?” he asks, trying to sound fine. 

“Let’s cut the bullshit,” you say finally, sitting down on the ground next to him. 

The words cut right through Poe, straight to the core and making him feel like his heart is stopped. To say he’s nervous is the greatest understatement of the century. “I- I don’t know what you mean.”

“Poe,” you sigh. “Do you not like me? I mean, you always act weird around me, and you never really talk to me, but you talk to everyone on base. Even C-3PO. And you despise that droid! I don’t know... I guess what I’m asking is… Did I do anything to upset you or make you hate me? Because if I did, I’m sorry, I just need to be able to work with you as second in command and not have it be so awkward…”

“No!” he barks out, probably too quickly. “You didn’t do anything wrong.” You can tell he means it genuinely, which makes you feel a little bit better. Tentatively, he reaches out to give your arm a reassuring squeeze. “I just- you’re right. I am acting weird. And I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry.”

“Why?” you ask innocently. Oh, how he really wishes you didn’t ask him that.

He looks over to BB-8, hoping the droid could give him some wisdom. Like the little orange buddy would know anything about romantic interactions, and if he’s going to epically fuck up everything for the Squadron if he tells you how he feels. He takes a deep breath, sighing quickly. So he’s doing this. “You know, when I heard about my runner up, I never thought she’d be this amazing,” he says slowly with a smile. “But then I met you. And you- I mean, what can I say? I’m smitten, sweetheart. You’re a great shot, you can fly anything, you were friends with a Mandalorian- like how badass is that! The way you know how to work on an X-wing is incredibly sexy,-” he chuckles to himself, you yourself grinning. “But you’re also one of the most kind and caring people I’ve ever met.” Shrugging, he looks up to read your face. “If you don’t want me to be your commander anymore, I understand. But I can’t keep going on pretending like I don’t feel anything for you.”

He braces himself for the inevitable rejection. But it doesn’t come. Instead, you scoot yourself closer to him, placing your hands on either side of him face. Your thumb brushes against his cheek, and your place your foreheads together. “You are the most incredible man I’ve ever met, Poe Dameron,” you whisper. “And I’d be fine with you being something more than just my commander.” Those words are music to his ears. He pulls you in for a kiss, soft and sweet, and the feeling of your lips on his makes him feel like he could finally die happy. 

You two are so engrossed in each other that you don’t hear the footsteps of someone else walking into the hangar. “Oh, come on Dameron!” Snap yells.

The both of you knock your foreheads together once more, giggling like you’ve just heard the funniest thing in the galaxy before he pulls you in for another kiss. 

[adenei]

"You aren't the boss of me"

Hey there @benedettabeby ! Thanks for the ask! This one may borderline at straying away from canon, but here’s 6th year Ron and Hermione having a moment during the Ron/Lav relationship. (I tried to mess with it so it can be canon compliant if the reader so chooses.

**********************************************

You aren’t the boss of me.

They’d been back from Christmas holidays for a few weeks now, and Hermione was coming down the girl’s staircase with the intention of heading straight for the library to return a book before curfew. When she reached the bottom of the stairs she noticed Ron and Lavender across the room. Instead of snogging each other’s faces off, as Hermione usually had to witness, they were sitting on the sofa, where it looked like Ron was trying to work on something.

“...Come on, Won-Won,” she heard Lavender say. “Let’s go find an empty classroom for a while! I’m bored.” Hermione rolled her eyes and stifled a gag.

“I’m sorry, Lav, but this is due tomorrow and I’ve waited too long to finish it. I can’t tonight,” Ron said. Hermione was surprised that Ron was standing his ground despite the Lavender’s continued pouting. 

An idea came into her head. They’d barely spoken since November, and it wasn’t that Hermione was completely ready to break the icy treatment she’d been giving him, especially considering all of the play-by-plays Lavender purposefully shared with Parvati at night when Hermione was trying to sleep. The newest endeavor was how she was going to get Ron to do ‘more,’ which made Hermione feel sick every time she thought about it. 

Determined to have a little pay back of her own, Hermione strolled across the room, but stopped behind them. She hoped her voice still remembered how to work in front of him. “We have rounds in five minutes.”

The sound of her voice startled them both, and Ron turned to look at her. “We haven’t shared duties since November. Besides, I thought it said I was on for tomorrow.”

“No, it’s today. And I’ve run out of people to switch with.” With that Hermione continued on her way out the portrait hole, and decided to wait a few minutes to see if he’d take the bait.

Back in the common room, Ron begrudgingly began packing up his things, “Looks like I won’t be sleeping tonight,” he said under his breath.

“Just skive off!” Lavender suggested. “Tell her you have homework to do, you know how important that is to her.” She rolled her eyes. “Besides, if you’re going to need a reason to not sleep tonight, then we can find that empty classroom and I’ll give you a better reason for it.” Lavender gave him the most inviting look she possibly could.

“Er, sorry Lav, it’ll be easier to just do the rounds.” He watched her face fall. “It’s not that I don’t want to! It’s just that things are busier now that we’re back from holidays, with quidditch and homework and prefect duties. I’ve got to manage it all, so we just might not have as much time to spend together.” 

Lavender huffed. “Fine, but I hope you aren’t planning on being friends with her again.” She leaned in to give him a possessive kiss goodbye.

Ron turned to leave, bringing his bag with him because he didn’t think he’d have time to bring it upstairs before Hermione took off without him. He didn’t really know how to respond to Lavender’s last statement. To be honest, he couldn’t believe Hermione had actually spoken to him, let alone said they had to spend time together. Could they actually find their way back to friendship? He couldn’t deny that he missed her, and the thought stirred a little excitement in him. But why did Lavender care so much if he was friends with her?

He exited the portrait hole to find Hermione waiting at the edge of the staircase. She turned to find him coming down the stairs and said, “Let’s make this quick, shall we?” 

He followed her without a word, and fell into his own thoughts. Tiny doubts were starting to creep into his mind as he replayed his conversation with Lav. All of what he’d said was true, except that he wasn’t sure how he felt about her suggestion that they do ‘more’. Sure, snogging was great and all, but ever since Lavender gave him that ghastly Christmas present, doubts were starting to trickle in his mind. Anyone who really knew him would know he’d never want something like that, let alone wear it. And was it just him, or was she becoming more clingy lately, too?

It’d been a while since he and Hermione had shared rounds, but he quickly realized that the way they were walking wasn’t their normal route. She stopped outside the study room that was next to the Prefect’s bathroom. “In here,” she said abruptly.

“What? Why?” Ron looked bewildered. She all but pushed him into the room and turned on the lights. 

“I figured you could use the time to actually get your work done.” Hermione’s words were short and to the point.

“But what about rounds?”

“I lied. You’re on the schedule for tomorrow. I’ll do it if you want.”

Ron let what she’d said sink in. Hermione hadn’t spoken to him in months, but was now helping him get his work done? “So you tricked me into thinking we had rounds, only to bring me here to study..”

Hermione remained stone-faced, refusing to give away any emotion. “Only if you want-”

“You’re not the boss of me, Hermione. Why would you lie about this? I’m perfectly capable of managing my own time without your help!”

“I’m not telling you what to do! And I’m not trying to manipulate you! Forget it. Do what you want. Oh wait, you’re already doing that with her. How could I forget.”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“You think I don’t hear every single detail of what goes on behind closed doors with you two? It’s like she purposely waits until she knows I’m there to tell Parvati everything. I swear, Ron if you’re putting her up to this just to hurt me more…”

“Do you really think I’d be that low to do that? Seriously, Hermione, you’re mental!”

“I don’t know what to think anymore!” Hermione hadn’t meant to let any of that slip out. She’d been careful to keep it bottled up for so long. She should have known this would be a bad idea. She took a deep breath. “Do what you want, Ron. I really don’t care. If you’d rather go get Lavender and bring her back here for a shag, I won’t stop you. I’ll wait outside the portrait hole for five minutes at ten in case you do want the time to work, so it looks like we actually did rounds.” With that, Hermione stormed out of the room and headed to the library as was her original intention.

She made her way down to the library and returned the books she no longer needed. Since it was five minutes to closing, she’d need to find somewhere else to go. Hermione thought of the Prefect’s bathroom and figured she could do with a bath to relax.

As she was making her way back toward the fifth floor, she ran into Lavender. “Where’s Ron?” Lavender asked rather cattily. 

“We split up for rounds. He didn’t want to be around me. He started in the dungeons. He’s probably near the kitchens by now.”

“Where are the kitchens?” she asked Hermione urgently.

“You don’t know?” Hermione scoffed. “What about Hufflepuff’s common room?” Lavender narrowed her eyes at her, but nodded. “Then go there,” Hermione said simply.

Lavender didn’t thank her, but before she turned to go on her way, she said, “He’s mine, Hermione. Don’t you even think about taking him from me.”

Hermione stared at her, not believing how possessive Lavender sounded. “In case you’re unaware, Ron is his own person, and can make his own decisions. You’d do well to remember that.” Hermione turned and walked away before Lavender could say anymore. She hurried back up to the fifth floor and into the Prefect’s bathroom before enough time passed and Lavender realized Ron wasn’t actually down there. She wasn’t going to bother telling Ron that Lavender was looking for him. He clearly didn’t want her help.

Hermione began drawing the bath and went over to her locker. She changed into her swim clothes and grabbed a fluffy towel. She’d heard stories from other prefects that the bathroom was open to anyone at any time, so she’d remembered halfway through last year to bring swim clothes to wear in case she ever wanted a bath. It seemed odd and perhaps defeated the purpose of it, but she’d rather not get caught naked in the large pool size tub if someone else were to walk in. 

She tied her hair back and recalled everything that had happened that evening. In retrospect, she really shouldn’t have intervened. Instead of helping the situation between her and Ron, she probably reignited the flame of the row between them. Her mind drifted to her conversation with Lavender. She couldn’t believe Lavender didn’t know where the kitchens were. She’d been with ron for what, three months now? It was his favorite place to frequent at night, and he would normally beg Hermione to stop there when they were on rounds or coming back from the library. She smiled at the memories, then realized that that was something that was still just ‘theirs.’

Hermione stayed in the warmth of the water, and lost track of the time. She opened her eyes when she heard the door open. It was Ron.

“Oh, sorry…” he said as he turned around sheepishly. 

“It’s fine,” she said. Hermione tugged on the strap of her top to indicate she was decent. 

“Right. Mind if I..?” he asked her. He must have had the same idea.

“No.” She watched him walk over to the boy’s lockers and disappear behind the wall. He reemerged in his own swim trunks and towel and got in on the other side of the massive tub.

“I finished my essay,” he said.

“That’s good,” she returned. There was an air of awkwardness around the whole situation. She struggled to decide whether she should tell him about her encounter with Lavender. “I ran into Lavender on my way back from the library.”

Ron looked at her. “Oh?”

“She was looking for you.”

“What’d you tell her?” he asked hesitantly.

“That you didn’t want to be around me, so we split up. I may or may not have lied about you starting down by the kitchens.”

“Always quick on your feet, you are,” Ron said with a slight chuckle.

“Yes, well, I found it interesting that she didn’t know where the kitchens were,” Hermione said nonchalantly.

“Er- well, the time’s never exactly come up for her to go down there with me.” Ron said meekly. Hermione noticed his ears darken slightly, and she decided to let it go, taking the small victory for what it was.

“She also told me to stay away from you,” Hermione said quietly.

“She what? She doesn’t get to decide who I do or don’t spend time with,” Ron didn’t look surprised by Hermione’s words. She wondered if there’d been a similar conversation between them in the past.

“I told her as much before I walked away. But I’ve been thinking, and it’d probably be best if I stayed away. I don’t want to cause any more trouble,” she said reluctantly.

“But-”

“Seriously, Ron, if you want to be with her, our friendship will just make things worse for you. I get it, you chose her, and I’ll respect that.” Her words sounded hollow. There wasn’t anger or jealousy behind them, just an acceptance that whatever they’d had before was gone. “We should probably get back. It’s almost ten.” 

Ron stared at her as he tried to take in her words. He certainly didn’t want Hermione out of his life forever, but he didn’t know how to tell her that. Especially not after three months of estrangement. Hermione got out of the water and Ron couldn’t help but stare. She was wearing the two-piece from the summer that had been the starring outfit in many of his late night wanks. He looked away as Hermione wrapped herself in the towel. 

“Are you coming?” she asked as she headed to the girl’s lockers.

“Er, yeah, be right there.” He watched her walk away as he tried to attend to the bulge that had made a strong appearance in his swim trunks. Satisfied that she was gone, Ron got out and wrapped himself in a towel as he drained the tub. He returned to the boy’s lockers to get dressed and try to get Hermione out of his mind. His erection hadn’t been this hard or strained in he couldn’t say how long. Even with Lavender on top of him in an empty classroom. 

She was waiting for him by the door when he emerged from the locker room. They made their way back silently, but as they were approaching the door, one thing was clear that Ron needed to say to Hermione. “Hermione, I don’t know what Lav’s saying in the dorms, but we haven’t shagged. I just wanted you to know that.”

“Thanks, Ron, but like I said, it’s none of my business.” She attempted a smile towards him as she entered the common room and made straight for the dorms. She steeled herself in preparation of going back to giving him the cold shoulder. Even though she’d had to accept what she’d told him earlier, she couldn’t help the hope that her heart felt by his words earlier. Maybe, just maybe, they’d get through this.

[swtorpadawan]

The Halcyon Legacy

Recently I’ve seen @tishinada , @spindlewit and others release impressive reports on their Legacies through KOTFE/KOTET. These looked like a lot of fun. I was planning on doing something with this myself, and one project sort of dove-tailed with the other. None on my OCs here are blood relations, but most have encountered each other. So without further ado, here is the HALCYON LEGACY.

Name: Corellan Halcyon Gender: Male Species: Human Status / Position: Alive / Formerly Jedi Master and Battlemaster of the Jedi Order; now Commander of the Eternal Alliance (with several courtesy titles he doesn’t care about, but others seem to) Relationship: Kira Carsen

About Him: Corellan was born on Legol, a minor corporate gas mining colony that was destroyed during the First Galactic War. An infant Corellan – named so by the Republic soldier (Rusk) who saved him - was evacuated off-planet and, discovered to be Force-sensitive, was turned over to the Jedi Order. (This is all recounted in my work “Beginnings”.) Corellan was raised and trained at a remote Jedi Enclave on Uphrades, where his most distinguished Master was Sagotto, a retired Jedi Battlemaster. At the age of 16 and now a full Padawan, Corellan began serving under a series of Masters in relatively short apprenticeships, most of whom were traveling around the Outer Rim. Through all of this, Corellan had very little contact with the “main” Jedi Order as a whole, which meant that when he was finally sent to Tython for his Jedi Trials, his view on the Order and his place within it was somewhat skewed. (At that point, Corellan thought that most Jedi were like him, and that he was nothing exceptional.)

Nevertheless, Corellan quickly developed a strong bond with Orgus Din during his brief time as his Padawan, and when he rescued Teeseven from the Flesh Raiders he made a friend for life. Corellan likewise grew close to Kira Carsen when she was assigned his Padawan, and shortly after her promotion to Knighthood, the two began a relationship. (This is recounted in the first chapter of my “Kira Carsen and the Hero of Tython” fic.) During the class story, Corellan committed only two “Dark-side” choices. The first was when he told Kira he would protect her from the Emperor; the second was when he slew the Emperor in cold blood on Dromund Kaas. Corellan is the coalition’s champion during the Shadow of Revan story, finally allowing the legendary warrior to find peace. His life takes a definite turn early in Knights of the Fallen Empire; separated from his crew and with the Order shattered, he realizes he must go beyond the Jedi’s teachings in order to win this conflict. His confrontation with Satele – a woman whom he’d looked at as almost a mother-like figure – on Odessen was intense and was one of the few times he’s almost lost it. He recovered, however, and he, Satele and Marr parted on good terms.      

Corellan goes through a number of armor changes during the game, wearing the Resolute Guardian armor set for most of the Jedi Knight campaign before switching to the Ruthless Scion – dyed blue and white – during KOTFE/KOTET. In the aftermath of these events, with Senya and Arcann’s blessing, Corellan started wearing Thexan’s raiment.

In my head-canon, Teeseven, Rusk, and Doc all saw their stories develop similar to the way they did in canon. Scourge did leave, however, did not take Kira with him to find Vitiate’s original body. Kira herself was part of an anti-Zakuulan resistance organization. When that group was destroyed and scattered, she became desperate to form a new one, but, in her own words ‘got into trouble’. (More to come on this, and what became of Scourge.)

Name: Gahraath Vaiken / [Cipher Nine] Gender: Male Species: Human Status / Position: Alive / Former top operative for Imperial Intelligence / Now top ‘cleaner’ for the Alliance   Relationships: Raina Temple About Him: Gahraath Vaiken, the man known to the galaxy as [Cipher Nine], went through the gamut of emotions in the final days of Imperial Intelligence, and a lesser operative would have cracked. Fortunately, he unexpectedly found comfort in the arms of Raina Temple, who saw him through those dark times. When it was over, [Cipher Nine] discovered that he was loyal to an Empire that never existed. When Sith Intelligence was formed under Lana Beniko, he accepted assignments as an independent operative, but never trusted her. During the early days of the Eternal Empire invasion, [Cipher Nine] was separated from his crew, marooned on a colony believed to be destroyed. By the time he found a way to escape, years had passed and his crew had long since scattered. [Cipher Nine] joined the Alliance not long after its formation, using a fake name and identity. On Odessen, he had a private conversation with Corellan Halcyon. No one seems to know what was said between the two, but afterwards, he disclosed his true status as a former operative of Imperial Intelligence. Lana Beniko was enraged at his deception, but the Commander insisted he be allowed to remain. Since then, he’s become the Alliance’s top sniper and removal specialist. (Though these days, he takes most of his targets in with tranquilizers.)

[Cipher Nine]’s crew mostly followed the canon story. SCORPIO, Kaliyo and Lokin would all eventually join the Alliance. Vector Hyllus withdrew to the Killiks, but eventually would broker an arrangement with the Alliance, largely with [Cipher Nine]’s help. [Cipher Nine] is unaware that Raina Temple returned to the Chiss Ascendency and has been looking for her for some time.    

Name: Bas’rish Gender: Female Species: Twi’lek Status / Position: Alive / Formerly known as “the Voidhound” / later “Logistics” deputy with the Alliance Relationships: A long series of short-term relationships over time, most recently with Koth Vortena About Her: Having grown up in poverty on Ryloth, Bas’rish sees her ship and her lifestyle as a smuggler captain as the ultimate expression of her freedom and has never allowed herself to be tied down by anything. Bas’rish first met Corellan and Kira on Nar Shaddaa, where she had gotten herself into trouble with the Hutts. This encounter led her to declare Corellan her ‘little brother’, although Corellan was only two years younger and about six inches taller than the Twi’lek smuggler. Two years after the Eternal Empire invaded, Bas’rish was captured by the Exarch of Belsavis during a mission. She was cruly treated by the Exarch for the next three years, during the course of which her crew believed she had been killed. [I retell this in my short story ‘Three Years’.]

Corellan and Teeseven rescued Bas’rish during their raid on the Star Fortress, and Bas’rish would go on to put down the Exarch herself. Afterwards, she joined the Alliance, where she was reunited with Bowdarr, and later Guss and Akaavi.    

Name: Xadya Gender: Female Species: Human Status / Position: Alive / Most recent Grand Champion of the Great Hunt / Alliance operative Relationships: While “gameplay Xadya” romanced Torian Cadera, “headcanon Xadya” eventually wound up with Mako. About Her: Xadya’s early background and childhood are a closely guarded secret. Its possible she’s told Mako how she got the scars on her face and necks, but if so, she’s the only one. Xadya briefly encountered Corellan on Makeb; before the two champions could come to blows, Kira and Mako – who had known each other back on Nar Shaddaa – managed to broker a cease-fire. Xadya told Corellan what had happened with Jun Seros, and the two eventually parted ways with a mutual professional respect. Xadya and her crew fought alongside Mandalore the Vindicated during the Zakuulan invasion, fleeing only after the old Mandalore – who was something of a father figure to Xadya – was killed. Xadya took a few survivors and went underground, stepping back from the galaxy and effectively letting her crew go their own ways, with the exception of Mako. It was only at this point that Mako, a few years older and wiser, expressed her feelings to Xadya, which she reciprocated. The two put together a small group of Mandolorians on the Outer Rim, a group which included Akaavi Spar. Years later, Torian – who had been trusted with the means to contact Xadya and Mako – reached out, eventually persuading the two to join the Eternal Alliance.

Xadya’s crew – with the exception of Mako – developed much as they did in the game. When she joined the Alliance, Corellan disclosed to her – out of respect -that he and Rusk had sent Skadge to prison. (She was not devastated.)

Xadya has come to respect Shae Vizla and accept her as the new Mandalore, but it was slow going.

Name: Illaynah Antilles Gender: Female Species: Human Status / Position: Alive / Former Major in the Republic Military / Former Commander Officer of Havoc Squad / leader of the Tralus resistance movement / eventual Alliance Special Forces Commander Relationships: A series of short-term liaisons, including with Ava Jaxo, Jonas Balkar and very briefly with Theron Shan. About Her: Illaynah Antilles is a native of Tralus, near Corellia. She had a complicated relationship with her father, a former Republic soldier who was forced to retire due to a crippling injury. He fell into an alcohol-driven depression and never wanted Illaynah to follow in his footsteps. He said some truly hurtful things to her when she enlisted, and Illaynah never resolved things with him before his death. Her years commanding Havoc Squad were complicated for Illaynah. She began her service as a true patriot of the Republic, but her experiences with General Garza during her service soon enlightened her to the darker realities that resulted from decades of conflict. Illaynah actually had high hopes for Chancellor Saresh, and that continued up until her failures when the Eternal Empire invaded. When the Republic effectively surrendered to Zakuul so they could continue their war against the Sith, she resigned in disgust. When she discovered her homeworld of Tralus now had a Zakuulan Star Fortress orbiting it. Illaynah ran a resistance cell for the next few years, and was eventually contacted by the Alliance for assistance. After helping Corellan take out the Star Fortress, she would eventually join the Alliance as their Special Forces commander.

Illaynah’s old squad-mates in Havoc Squad saw their careers take similar roads as in the canon. Jorgan took over while Elara was transferred to Jace Malcolm’s staff. Forex became a Republic mouthpiece, while Yuun went off on his own to Zakuul to study their technology. Tanno Vik eventually settled on Asylum to do Tanno’s thing. The first three all would eventually find themselves joining the Alliance, with Elara serving as a representative of the Republic military. While they all have other responsibilities, Havoc Squad occasionally reforms for special missions.  

Name: Zu’fanda Gender: Female Species: Twi’lek Status / Position: Deceased / Darth Nox / Member of the Dark Council / Order of Revan Relationship: Andronikos Revel About Her: Zu’fanda spent her early years as a slave in the Sith Empire. Despite countless abuses, she nevertheless persevered, and when it was discovered that she was was Force sensitive, she thrived as a Sith. Although solidly a Dark Sider, Zu’fanda understood that the Force was greater than what she’d been taught on Korriban. This led to many interesting conversations with Ashara Zavros. The two never completely saw eye to eye, but it did lead Zu’fanda to take a hard look at the Emperor. Realizing what Vitiate was, she made a critical decision to stop this existential threat.

She threw in with the Order of Revan.

Zu’fanda led the assault on Tython, with the secret objective of securing the Rakatan artifact the Revanites needed. Just before the Republic counterattack began, Zu’fanda gave the order for dozens of captured Padawans to be executed. Ashara protested the decision, leading to a verbal altercation between master and apprentice right when Zu’fanda’s full focus needed to be on the coming Republic attack.

That attack came in the form of Corellan, Kira and Lord Scourge appearing in the council chamber to confront Zu’fanda, Ashara and Khem Val. It should have been an even fight, but the conflict between Zu’fanda and Ashara threw off the timing of the Imperials. Ashara missed a ‘switch’ as Corellan squared off against Nox, giving Kira the opening she needed to strike down the Dark Council member. At Nox’s death, Ashara went catatonic while Khem charged Kira in an uncontrolled fury... leaving the Dashade open for Scourge to cut him down.    

In the aftermath of Zu’fanda’s death, Ashara was taken prisoner by the Jedi order, but later escaped during the Zakuulan invasion of Tython. Andronikos swore revenge against the Jedi who had killed the love of his life. Xalek, regretting his master’s death but judging it to be the will of the Force, departed the service of the Sith Empire. [Later showing up on Ilum.] Talos, loyal to Nox but not particularly close to her, rejoined the Imperial Reclamation Service. [Talos and Xalek would eventually encounter Corellan, joining the Eternal Alliance.] Andronikos is still unaccounted for. Ashara, however, may be making an appearance soon…

Name: Ulannium Kaarz Gender: Male Species: Mirialan Status / Position: Bar’senthor of the Jedi Order; later special emissary to the Eternal Alliance Relationship: Nadia Grell [Though their relationship develops very differently from the class story, which is terribly rushed.] About Him: Ulannium was raised on Uphrades at the same enclave that produced Corellan. Despite the fact that he was four years older than the future Battlemaster, the two younglings became friends, both somewhat in awe at the other’s abilities. As a Padawan and later a Jedi Knight and Master, Ulannium proved to be an incredibly potent Seer and one of the best diplomats in the order. Ulannium provided comfort to Nadia after the death of her father, and it was only years later, after Nadia became a Jedi Knight in her own right, that the two began acting on their feelings for each other, and only then as equals.

After the Eternal Empire invaded and Tython fell, Ulannium helped Gnost-Dural evacuate, establishing the colony on Ossus. His crew each went their own way, with Zenith returning to Balmorra, Qyzen starting to mentor other Trandoshans, Tharan Cedrax roped into the Republic’s latest secret weapons projects, and Felix Iresso rejoining the Republic military, only to be captured opposing the Eternal Empire. [These are all consistent with the base story.] Ulannium and Nadia continued their relationship on Ossus discreetly, with only Gnost-Dural knowing their secret. After years of isolation from the galaxy, Corellan and the Eternal Alliance would discover Ossus, helping them fight off a rogue Imperial attack. [This is divergence from the canon story, where the attack on Ossus was ordered by Empress Acina.] Afterwards, Ulannium and Nadia effectively joined the Alliance, serving as representatives of the now-rebuilding Jedi order.

Having grown up together, Ulannium and Corellan remain close friends, albeit they’ve only worked together on a handful of occasions.  

Name: Lord Kael Gender: Male Species: Pureblood Status / Position: Deceased / Emperor’s Wrath Relationship: After a series of ‘encounters’ during the class story, Kael eventually committed himself to Jaesa Willsaam. However, upon realizing that he had been abandoned by Vitiate, Kael went insane and abandoned Jaesa and his crew. By the time she found out what happened to him, he had been killed on Yavin.

About Him: Kael was a truly monstrous Sith who never passed on the opportunity to order a good massacre or to torment a fallen enemy. Perhaps his sole redeeming virtue was that he was (usually) nice to Vette, though frankly, he almost thought of her as a pet. When he pursued Jaesa, he did so with particular gusto, relishing in the slaughter of her parents and her former Master. Like most Sith, Kael was raised to regard the Emperor as a god. When he became the Emperor’s Wrath and slew Baras, he saw it as his ‘great destiny’ and committed himself fully to Vitiate. When it was revealed that the Emperor had been using the Empire (including Kael) for his own ends the entire time and sought to destroy the galaxy, it broke something in his mind. He abandoned his crew on a murderous bender; Jaesa may not have been a stabilizing influence on his life, but Vette and the others had been. In his rage, Kael was approached by a powerful and charismatic man who promised him the chance for revenge against Vitiate.

Unfortunately for Kael, that man was Revan.

Kael threw in with the Revanites, becoming Revan’s personal enforcer. During the Battle of Yavin, Revan sent him out with the last of his reserves in a last-ditch counteroffensive. At the crucial moment, Kael and his warriors were confronted by Corellan and Kira. For nearly an hour they battled. The Hero of Tython and the Emperor’s Wrath were evenly matched, but Corellan was playing a mental game. Kael’s offensive lost all momentum, letting the coalition forces rally. Realizing that even if he won the battle that he had already lost the war, Kael lost the last of his sanity, attacking the Jedi with complete abandon. With Kira’s help, Corellan slew him.

As for the rest of Kael’s old crew, their fates mostly played out as they did in the canon story. Vette eventually teamed with Gault, Quinn became an advisor to Empress Acina, Pierce became the Empire’s new ‘model’ soldier, and Broonmark went on a killing spree against everyone who he blamed for the Talz being the cuddly teddy-bear insects they are. As for Jaesa, she swore vengeance against Corellan and Kira. Her plans broke down when the Eternal Empire attacked and Corellan disappeared while Kira went underground. But its possible we may hear from her again… _________________________________________ I hope people enjoyed this. I will tag some people for fun, but no pressure! @inyri​ @greyias​ @legacystarwarred​ @pauletta-00​

And anyone else who wants to try it! 

[batboysandgirls]

Tim Drake x Reader - Explosions And Other Saturday Morning Activities - PART 3

PART ONE HERE, PART TWO HERE, and PART FOUR HERE! Title: Explosions And Other Saturday Morning Activities - PART 3 Pairing: Tim Drake x Reader Summary: After saving Red Robin (and finding out his secret identity), you’ve become a semi-public figure in Gotham, especially so once a rumor starts that you and Gotham royalty Tim Drake-Wayne are dating.  You’ve garnered a little TOO much attention, apparently.  Black Mask kidnaps you and holds you in his warehouse lair.  You fight to find a way out, and to get help from the Batfamily and actual authorities before Black Mask gets his hands on you.  But that’s not going to be easy... Notes: Canon-typical descriptions of violence and injuries, particularly severe in this part. Words: 5k Taglist:  @silentwhispofhope, @ashfromthesol, @oh-no-my-ravioli, @katelynkargol, @rhymeswithrason, @grincheveryday, @ivysfaves

You woke up laying on a concrete floor, hands bound with a zip tie.  A week ago, this would have been insane; your biggest problems were paper jams and how to make Ramen fast enough to pack some in your thermos for lunch.  Now, though, waking up with your hands tied was just about as weird as discovering Red Robin’s secret identity and saving some superheroes after your office exploded.  Sometimes that’s how it goes.

Sometimes your friend George asks you to help him fix his computer and then knocks you unconscious with some sort of gas!  George, of all people!  Perfectly nice friend of yours.  At least, it had seemed.  Could you trust anyone?  Whatever.  Time to focus.

Your instinct was to sit up and figure out where you were, but you kept still.  There might be people watching you who are pretty kept unawares that you were awake.  From where you laid, you were staring at a blank, cinder block wall.  There was a very small window high up in the wall, letting in a bit of light.  It was clearly pretty dark outside, you could see, but either from the moon or cityscape, brightness shone through.  You closed your eyes and listened.  You couldn’t hear… anything, besides your own breathing.

Time to test if anyone was near you.  You kept your eyes closed and made a soft sleepy noise, that’s kind of like a moan or grunt.  You heard no noise in response.  Okay.  You moved your body a bit, like you were fidgeting in your sleep.  Still nothing—not a person’s footsteps, not the sound of clothes rustling as someone turned.  Perfect.  You opened your eyes and sat up, looking around quickly.

The wall you’d been looking at was on your right, in front and behind you were totally bare cinder block walls, and on your left was a wall with an ordinary door in it.  The room had a higher ceiling than you’d figured a prisoner/holding cell would have.  You managed to stand up and scuttled over to the door.  You flopped back onto the floor and looked under the crack.  There wasn’t much to see.  It just looked like there was a plain hallway outside.  Not too helpful.

Okay.  It seemed a few things were clear.  You had been left alone.  You were probably just stuck in some sort of random room in Black Mask’s… Lair?  Hideout?  Uh.  Office?  This room kind of screamed office building.  The next thing that was clear—you needed to get out.

The first part of getting out was getting free of this zip tie.  You had seen an infographic at some point…  Okay.

(You were going to be fine.  It’s okay.  It’s okay, right?  You need someone to tell you it’s okay, but no one is here.  So you tell yourself.)

So, the first way to get out of a zip-tie was if you presented your hands to your captors with your fists clenched and plans facing down, you could unclench and turn your palms inward and slide out of them.  Being unconscious meant they secured your wrists tightly, so there was no way to slip through.

There was a second way involving using your fingernail to lift the locking bar on the zip tie, making it easy to, well, un-zip the zip tie, to pull out the cord.  But that was easier when you had multiple people.  You didn’t have a good enough angle to get a fingernail in the zip tie on your own.

And the third way.  A bit more forceful.  You tightened the tie as much as possible with your teeth, then put the locking mechanism between your hands.  You then lift your arms above your head and yank them down, and back towards your stomach, flaring your arms out like you’re trying to touch your shoulder blades together.  The weakest point of a zip tie is the locking mechanism, so the tie usually snaps at the lock as your arms come down.

You pulled the tie tighter with your teeth, made harder because your hands were trembling.  Why should you be scared?  This was simple.

(Why should you be scared?  Because you were in adrenaline mode.  Because your brain went totally calm, so you wouldn’t be panicstricken.  Because this was now one too many near death experiences and sometimes you gotta shove it all down to make it through alive.)

After it was tightened to where your circulation wasn’t quite cut off, you lifted your shaking hands as far over your head as you could, then slammed them down onto your stomach.  The zip tie didn’t break.  You felt your heart beat a little faster, a little panic leaking into your mind.  No, no, no.  Not now.  Try again.  Arms up, and down as forceful as you could—!

Snap!

The zip tie broke, and your chest flooded with relief.  Unfortunately, strange calm that had held back your sheer panic seemed to have broken as well.  The task ahead of you now was a lot more daunting.  You were going to leave this room somehow.  And make it to safety without getting caught and killed.  From the window, you knew it was late.  You probably had only been unconscious for a few hours.  That meant that people might not know you had been kidnapped.  Tim might not know...

(GOD!  WHY DID TIM SPECIFICALLY POP INTO YOUR HEAD?  THIS IS NOT HELPFUL, BRAIN!)

...And if no one knows you’ve been kidnapped, then no one probably knows to come save you.  You’re on your own, then.  Okay.  Alright.  You’ve got this.  Probably.

Escaping was the goal.  The immediate option was go through the tiny window.  There were a few issues.  For one, the window was very high up in the wall, and the walls were taller than average to begin with.  Next, even though the cinder blocks did mean there were little gaps where mortar separated the bricks, you didn’t think you would get much of a grip if you tried to climb.  Last, even if somehow you managed to scale it, if you fell off near the top, you’d certainly break a limb—if not your skull.

So, that left going through the door into whatever compound this was and trying to find a way out.  Which was a deeply terrifying prospect, but it seemed to be your only option.

You stilled for a moment.  What could, feasibly, happen when you went out there?  Why were you here in the first place?  Obviously, Black Mask knew who you were after you saved Nightwing and Robin, helping to foil his plans.  Obviously, he had you kidnapped by a Wayne Enterprises intern who is really a spy for him.  Less obvious points—George was an intern long before you got involved with the bat vigilantes.  Does that mean he was a spy for different reasons but was ordered to kidnap you after the whole tower attack mess happened?  What was his original goal as a spy?  And why now did he kidnap you?  If you annoyed Black Mask so much, wouldn’t he just... kill you?

A chill ran down your spine.  No.  No, if Black Mask wanted you dead, George would have killed you in his apartment.  He specifically wanted you alive, probably to use you for… something.  Make a big spectacle of killing this civilian hero somehow?  Torture you to see if you know the identities of the batclan?  Torture you just to get revenge for ruining his operation?

The fact that you were alive suggested that perhaps, even if you did break out and were found by Black Mask’s goons, that you might not be killed instantly.  You had to be kept alive for something, in all likelihood.  So as dangerous as it is to go out of your cell, it probably wouldn’t be fatal.  Probably.  The fact was, you likely were being held to eventually be killed or tortured.  Black Mask didn’t kidnap you just to let you go.  So, leaving your cell and running the risk of getting killed was about as safe as waiting to see what happens.

The door was locked, but you picked it with a broken half of the zip tie and a hair pin that you thankfully had decided to use this morning to keep your hair out of your face.  You opened the door.

✹ ✹

The complex was surprisingly empty and open.  You occasionally heard people coming, but you always managed to duck into a closet or room before they passed to avoid notice.

Your heart seemed to beat so loud you were sure the goons would hear it through the wall, but, thankfully, life decided against resembling an Edgar Allen Poe story and gave you a break.  But your hands didn’t stop shaking as you sped through the complex, searching for some way to get out of here.

There were doors everywhere, and almost every one of them was a small armory.  You were aware Black Mask was a crime lord, but you now just were realizing he probably is responsible for all the weapon trafficking in Gotham.  It seemed were more than enough guns in these storage closets to arm all of the Gotham gangs several times over.  Just what the city needs…

Your eyes were peeled for security cameras, glancing just a tad around a corner to see if you could spot any on the ceiling before you went down a new hallway.  Fortunately, there didn’t seem to be any (although you weren’t resting easy with that—surely there were some out of sight).

Less fortunately, you weren’t much closer to getting out of this place.  You couldn’t find anything that seemed to lead towards an exit; you were just lost in a maze of armory rooms.  After maybe fifteen minutes of wandering, hearing something, and hiding in a closet full of guns, you came across a room with windows looking in.  It looked like a security room, with a bunch of numbered monitors showing camera feeds—most not from this level of this building, but other floors and rooms.  There were a few on this basement level, and you bet they probably would have shown you at least briefly moving past.

(Damn.  You hated being right.  Things had been going pretty well for you for a kidnapping… couldn’t they just continue to go right?)

The way the security room was set up, you thought there may be room for you to slide behind the desk and monitors if someone comes and stay there silently for a while.  Not a bad place to search.  You tried the handle, and when it opens, you slip in.

There was a computer below all the security monitors, but it was locked and you couldn’t create another profile or anything to log on.  You then started searching the drawers of the desk in this room.  There were a lot of papers (which at a glance seem to be weapon trafficking records), some pens, a couple guns, and, miraculously, in the final drawer, your stuff.  Your keys and your phone.

(Never in your life had you been so glad to see your phone.  You could imagine your grandparents making some comment about “kids and their phones!” and you almost smiled.)

You grabbed the phone and immediately crawl behind the desk, out of the line of sight of anyone walking through the door or sitting in front of the monitors.  You felt very claustrophobic, but it would be very hard for someone to spot you.  Your hands shook as you went to Maps and turned on location.  You had a decent signal, and it quickly placed you in an abandoned warehouse in Tricorner Yards…  it gave an approximate address.  You called 911 next, carefully explaining where you were based on the mapping and what had happened to you.  The operator sounded a little alarmed but told you to stay as safe as possible until authorities arrived and that they were contacting the police.

You sat for a few moments in silence after you hung up with 911 before you called Tim.  It went to his answering machine (which he hadn’t even set up—lame).  You expected that, though.

“Hey, Tim.  It’s _____.  I’m currently at an abandoned warehouse in Tricorner Yards.  Got kidnapped by George, another intern.  He works for Black Mask.  I found a way to break out of my cell, and find my phone.  Now I’m just waiting.”

You paused.

“If they do find me soon, they could kill me.  Or worse.  And I wanted you to know, in case that happens, that I—I—“

(Wait, what are you doing?  What are you saying?  You barely know this boy!  WHAT ARE YOU DOING??)

“I’m thankful for your help.  To me and the city.  You deserve to know that from someone who really knows you.”

(Okay.  That’s fine.  General appreciation is okay.  Don’t go too fast on anything else, though.  Cool?  Cool.)

“I’ll hang up now and continue to hide...  Goodbye, Tim.”

(Your breath caught on “goodbye.”  Was there a point in not going fast and spilling the raw instinct of your heart when death was so close?  Probably not, no.  Did you have the courage to overcome your fear?  Also no.)

You hung up the phone, then quickly realized if you were caught, it would be better to be found without the phone.  You deleted the calls from your history and stuck it back in the random drawer it had been inside in this security room.

You stood for a second, running through possibilities in your mind.

So, at some point, someone is going to retrieve you from your cell and realize you’re not there if, you know, you’re not there.  Then an active hunt would probably begin for you.  But you’ve now put in a call to the authorities who probably would get the GCPD, Batman, and… his associates on the case.  If you return to your cell, making it appear you’d never left—they wouldn’t think anyone was coming.  Which could be a huge advantage for your rescuers.

The other option was to continue to hide outside the cell.  These security cameras for sure caught you walking around, but since no one has come in here, you’re not sure if they would even check it without a good reason.  But a manhunt for a missing captive would be a good reason.

Well, then.  Seems like going back to your cell is oddly the best thing to do.  On the security table, there was a basic map of this building with numbers.  Each number corresponded to a feed, revealing all the security camera locations.  The map also gave you an idea of how to return to your cell successfully, because you definitely only ended up here by chance.

With that knowledge, you left the office and headed for your cell.

✹ ✹

Tim was on a stakeout of a gang selling drugs in the Financial District when Batman came in over the coms.

“All members of the batfamily in the Gotham Harbor vicinity.  Black Mask’s headquarters have been located in an abandoned warehouse in Tricorner. He’s taken a hostage, _____, the girl involved in saving Red Robin and freeing Nightwing and Robin during our most recent encounter with Black Mask.  The police are locking down the area for us to go in and rescue _____,  before they begin a full raid of the warehouse.”

Tim grappled to the nearest rooftop immediately, stakeout forgotten.  “I’m on my way. ETA 10 minutes.”

“Be there in 15,” crackled Dick’s voice in his ear.

“Good.  I’ll need you both,” Bruce said.  He sounded sincere, which made Tim’s stomach flip even more than it already was.

You were in big trouble if in Black Mask’s hands.  And he had good reason to hate you.  Not many civilians could claim having a hand in Black Mask’s defeat—you being one of the rare exceptions.

(Tim thought of your kind but scrutinizing eyes.  How you looked at him like he was a puzzle you couldn’t quite solve but wanted to spend more time working on, how your calm voice was the only thing Tim could remember from that horrible day in Wayne Tower, how he was looking forward to seeing you in a way he hadn’t been looking forward to seeing anyone for a long time…)

No, no… Tim tried to clear his head as he moved across Gotham.  Feelings only make things more complicated.  Best to keep it simple...

(You are someone he doesn’t want to lose.  You too easily could be one of his many phantoms, his many ghosts.  Gone, but always with him, haunting.)

...best to keep it simple.

✹ ✹

You had been sitting in your cell for about a half hour when a man opened the door.

(Returning to your cell was easy, and the door locked itself behind you.  The zip tie still had been broken, but you could have done that and not been able to unlock the door.  Hopefully no one would know about your excursion and call to the police…)

“Get up, y—where’s your zip tie?”  The man was holding a gun but looked much less intimidating with such an incredulous look on his face.

“Not hard to break one of those,” you said, mimicking the motion you used to break it.  “But I’m still stuck here, so it didn’t help me do much of anything other than enjoy the circulation to my wrists.”

The guy still looked dumbstruck for a second before he shook his head and walked over to you.  You scrambled backward instinctively but he yanked you up by your arm and shoved your body in front of him.  You then felt him press the cold barrel of the gun against your back, through the fabric of your shirt.

You inhaled shakily as the guy jabbed the barrel into your spine.

“Walk, kid.  Or I fire this thing and you won’t be able to.”

You did as you were told.  The guy barked instructions as you moved through the complex.  You didn’t pass by the security office, instead you went through a nondescript door that was actually a stairwell.  You went up five stories, your legs feeling like jello as you got to the final landing.  There was a pretty fancy looking door.  Uh oh.

“Excited to meet the boss, girlie?” the man cooed in your ear, leaning forward.  You winced.  No, actually.  You weren’t excited.

You were terrified.

The man grabbed you by the arm and pushed open the door, throwing you onto the floor before you could even look around.

As you struggled to your feet, you noticed three things.  First, you were surrounded by men with machine guns.  Second, George didn’t appear to be in the vicinity, which kind of sucked.  You wanted to be able to glare at him.  Third, this was easily the nicest part of this building.  It looked like it could be an office in Wayne Tower.  There was a fancy wooden desk, huge windows behind it, a skylight splashing the glow of the moon onto the floor.  Cushy, modern, classy…

There was one more thing.  Black Mask was standing directly in front of you.  Your brain was processing that a little slowly for fear of just passing out in dread right there.

He gave you a kick just as you were standing, and you yelped as you fell back down.  His laughter echoed like—well, you couldn’t say like a supervillain.  He was a supervillain.

(Was this a productive debate to be having over semantics in your head at a time like this?  No.  Were you having it anyway to try to cope with this situation?  Certainly.)

“I can’t believe this thing ruined the Wayne Tower operation,” Black Mask snorted.  “Can’t be older than eighteen.”

You frowned.  Didn’t like being called a thing.  Also, you were nineteen, but even with your general snarkiness, you couldn’t work up the courage to snap back.  You didn’t bother to get up this time; you sat on the floor, staring.

“You’re probably wondering what I’m going to do to you, kid.”

He seemed to be waiting for a response, so you said nothing.  He narrowed his eyes.

“Quiet one, huh.  That’s fine.”  Black Mask picked up a knife off his desk.  “I’m sure I can get you talking.”

“I—I can talk,” you stammered, and, god, you sounded as scared as you felt.  “I just—what can I tell you?  I’m just…”

You trailed off, and Black Mask laughed.

“Just what?  Not just anything normal after that your little rescue stunt.  I am interested in one thing: those pesky secret identities.  You were talking with the bat bastards, yeah?”

(Okay.  Keep calm.  Confusion, bewilderment; you know nothing about the batclan.  Don’t overdo it, though.)

“I don’t know their secret identities,” you said, shaking your head, just to sound as fearing and disbelieving as possible.  “I barely spoke more than a couple words to Nightwing when I cut him down before I ran out of there.  You need a detective or something.  Not me, I—I—”

Black Mask kicked you.

“You cut them down with one of their weapons.  You didn’t just find that, now, did you?  The other one.  Red Robin.  He gave it to you.  And I attacked them through their masks.  There’s no way he kept that on and lived.  And you are one of the only people who may have seen that boy without the mask on.”

“I don’t know who he is!  I just found him nearly passed out with some makeshift bandana with slits over the eyes an–an–and I took the batarang thing from his belt to cut them down.  His face was covered in blood, too.”

Another kick.  You let out a scream.  You thought a rib might be broken.  Black Mask leaned down to you.

“I don’t believe you, girl.  And even if you refuse to tell me, I’m going to hurt you so badly, and then show your beaten, bloodied corpse so publicly that no one ever will pull a stunt like yours again.”  His eyes were red—shining and fixed on you.  You could feel the blood leaving your face.  This man was not going to kill you, not at first.  He was going to put you through so much pain you would wish you were dead, and then some, before he’d finally finish you off.

Your face must have shown this realization, because he began to laugh as he stood back and gestured to you.

“Now she gets it, boys!  Now it’s coming to her.”

(Some laugh with him.  Some just look at you, guns trained, eyes void of anything.  Those guys were scarier than the laughing ones.  Much scarier.)

“This isn’t fun.  This isn’t a game.  This is war, and you’ve just lost, kid.”

He twirled the knife in his hand, approaching you with a cheerful whistle, and you stared, wondering if it would be better to close your eyes or watch what he was about to do to you.

When the skylight crashed in, you had never been so glad to avoid making a decision.  It had been probably close to forty minutes since your call to 911 and then Tim—about time!

You were sitting just under the skylight, and, as you heard a crash above you, you instinctively leapt to the right.  A smoke pellet went off, and then guns started firing.  You were already on the ground and crawled straight ahead, finding Black Mask’s desk and quickly hiding behind it.  Hopefully at least you’d be safe from some of the gunfire here.

Then, the window behind you broke apart as someone—from the brief view of their behind you got, you were guessing Nightwing—jumped through it, covering you in a smattering of glass.

(Maybe glass windows aren’t the move if you’re in a villain lair.  Or even in an office building that gets targeted by a villain.  You’d like to escape one incident from this saga not covered in glass, but you weren’t sure that was going to happen.)

Strangely, that put you over the edge.  Silently, tears ran down your cheeks, streaking your face with hot, wet trails that fell onto your shirt.  You didn’t make a sound, not that anyone could have heard over the firefight going on behind you and behind the desk—

(You swore that Black Mask was monologuing something at Batman.  In the middle of a fire fight.  This is why people hate Gotham.)

—but you cried.  You’d kept it together through the whole Wayne Tower fiasco, becoming a semi-public figure through association overnight, and through waking up in a cell and sneaking around this complex… but a little glass and something inside you just, well, shattered.

How many near death experiences had you had in the past week?  In the attack on Wayne Tower, the window exploding, barely escaping the stairway that collapsed, almost getting electrocuted, rescuing Nightwing and Robin without notice.  In this kidnapping attempt, George not killing you in his apartment, evading the detection of Black Mask’s goons as you snuck around, the batfamily swooping in to save the day right before Black Mask was going to torture and kill you.

A week ago, mere seconds before the windows of Wayne Tower exploded and you became the most ridiculously traumatized intern in the history of Gotham, you were a totally normal girl.  You had no ties to anything much bigger than yourself; you were just another faceless Gothamite and another faceless college student.

Even though you felt really glad to have met Tim, you just wanted this to be over.  To not be in danger, to not be a pseudo-celebrity on Buzzfeed… to just be you.  You, peacefully, happily, without fear.  You hadn’t felt like yourself much since the attack.  You pushed it all down, you tried to make yourself laugh with lightening thoughts to get you through this…

(And those thoughts were doing a pretty good job, you noted.)

But you can’t bottle up feelings and pretend everything is okay when it’s not.  Because it was really not.  And when things aren’t okay, it is okay to let it out.

So you wept to the sound of gunfire.  You almost didn’t notice when a familiar red-clad figure appeared next to you, almost didn’t notice his wrapping an arm around you and grappling out the window.  But the warmth of another person, one who you knew and one who you cared for a little bit more than (or a lot more than) the average person, filled you with relief.  It pulled you out of the darkness consuming you for just a moment.  Tim.  Tim.

He was here, and he was going to help you get away from everything.  You rested your head on his shoulder as you flew out of the warehouse into the cool Gotham night, clinging tight to him.  You were holding so close to him first because you were VERY high up in the sky, which was slightly terrifying and mesmerizing, but also because you needed some physical comfort and Tim could give it to you.

It was probably only a couple minutes you spent getting a bit of distance from the warehouse district, but the tranquility felt like hours compared to the chaos of the last few minutes.

When you finally landed on the ground, you were standing in front of a police barricade blocking off a few streets that led to Black Mask’s headquarters.  There were cops waiting nearby an ambulance who looked ready to wrap you in a blanket and clean you up, which would definitely be appreciated.  But you couldn’t let go of Tim’s arm.

Tim—Red Robin—finally spoke to you as he watched you look at the police.

“I thought you might need time to just let it out there, but are you alright?  Did he do anything to you?”

You opened your mouth to speak, then got choked up.  Tim took your hands, gave them a squeeze, and you finally found your words, swallowing back the emotion.

“No, he was about to do—do something when you guys came in.  I’m fine, other than the cuts from the glass.  I just—I—”

You thought you might start to cry again, but Tim pulled you into a hug.  He rubbed your back in circles and softly whispered “you’re safe” and “don’t worry” a few times.  You stood like that a while, not actually crying anymore but feeling that wave of emotion run through you again.  When you parted, you found it in you to smile at him.

“I still want dinner with your family, you know,” you whispered.

He smiled back.  “Oh, I was planning on it.”

“You should probably get back to… your fellow vigilantes.  I don’t want you to be unable to help because of me,” you said.

“It’s not just about taking out the bad guys, _____,” Tim replied quietly, “It’s about saving people.  If you need me here, I’ll stay as long as you want.”

(“Stay forever” seems like an excessive response to that offer, but your brain supplied it readily.)

You hugged him again, for a little longer than was necessary, then stepped back.  “Go.  They’ll need you.  I’m going to see you soon, anyway.”

Tim stared at you for just a second.  That look in his eyes…  You didn’t want to be overoptimistic about anything.

(Was he feeling what you were feeling?  Was this real?  Beyond the inside of your head and heart?)

Then Tim nodded, and with that Red Robin zoomed away with a shot off his grapple gun.

You walked up closer to the GCPD barricade and were immediately escorted to the ambulance where they began to clean and wrap up the lacerations from the window exploding at you.  They spoke softly to you and let you know that things were going to be alright, and that they were going to keep you safe and protected.  You appreciated it all, but your heart wasn't in it.  It was somewhere else entirely—swinging through the cityscape with a boy dressed in red and black.  The thought tugged a gentle smile across your lips.  You closed your eyes.

(UPDATE: PART FOUR IS HERE!) (THERE WILL BE A PART 4!!  WHICH WILL BE THE LAST PART!!!  I’ve already written it.  It is all done.  I just have to edit it...!  And, I promise, it’s a lot lighter than this chapter.  What’s going to happen between you and Tim?  Is anything going to happen?  You’ll see!  Thank you all for reading!!  I’ve gotten so many wonderful comments and asks encouraging and thanking me for this fic, and it makes my heart so full.  I’m so glad people have enjoyed this story!  I hope you’ll stick around for the final part!!  Let me know if you would like me to add you to the tag list! ˘◡˘ )

[elyvorg]

The Ultimate Talent Development Plan AU is the one canon AU in which everything is thoroughly good and despair-free and everyone lives happily ever after. …Except for Maki, potentially, because this is also the one AU in which her assassin cult is actually real and she might have to just go back to killing people once she graduates. This is Unacceptable and needs to have something done about it, because Maki deserves a happy life even more than anyone else after what she’s been through.

One of the possible ways of dealing with this is that Shuichi would fix things for her using his detective skills, like he offers to do in her last FTE in canon. He wouldn’t directly take down the assassin cult himself, but he could amass enough evidence of its awful deeds to pass on to some kind of government authority which could then move in and arrest all of its members and take the kids somewhere safe.

One time while I was thinking about this, though, a thought occurred to me: what if the assassin cult got wind of the fact that Shuichi was investigating them? What would they do then?

Imagine Maki going back to her work after graduation while clinging to the thought that it won’t be long now, that this new name on her hit list might just be the last person she’ll ever have to kill before it’s over and she’s free… only to see the name Shuichi Saihara.

And, well, that thought sure wouldn’t get out of my head and blossomed into an entire story. It would take me too long to write this as an actual fic, so instead, here’s just all of the ideas I had for how things would go, essentially telling the story right here in bullet-point form.

Part 1: how we got there

Let’s assume Hope’s Peak privileges meant that Maki didn’t have to work as an assassin while she was attending. So she’d begun to get used to having a relatively normal, non-murdery life for the three years she was there, especially with everything Kaito did to help her start facing her issues and feel more like a normal girl than a murderer.

Perhaps Maki had begun to hope, after Kaito had helped her admit that she never wanted to kill anyone, that Hope’s Peak’s supposed privilege of making its graduates “set for life” could mean that she wouldn’t have to be an assassin any more. Like, the Academy would pull some strings with the assassin cult to just completely cut her ties with it and let her live freely without the fear of those kids starving if she didn’t do what she was ordered to.

Towards the end of the three years, Kaito and Shuichi start to worry about what’ll happen to Maki once she graduates and ask her if they can do anything, but Maki tells them that she expects Hope’s Peak will do something like that for her and she’ll be fine. (She’s not completely sure they will, but she doesn’t want her friends to worry.)

…Except, that doesn’t happen. Turns out what Hope’s Peak meant by “set for life” in Maki’s case is that she’ll get to be an assassin for life. In one of her FTEs, Maki vaguely alludes to the fact that assassins in her cult are killed off once they’ve outlived their usefulness – like, perhaps, when they reach adulthood and are old enough to possibly start thinking for themselves. All Hope’s Peak did by pulling strings was make it so that that won’t happen to Maki, so that she’s trapped in her life of killing people forever! How nice of them!!!

When she learns this, Maki probably doesn’t even want to tell Kaito and Shuichi, because she doesn’t want to worry them and anyway there’s nothing they can do about it (right?). Kaito, of course, notices her acting off and distant and prods the truth out of her. Even then, Maki insists that it’s not a big deal, she’ll be able to handle it now that Kaito’s helped her feel like she’s more than just a killer; she can just live a double-life between horrible murderer and normal person and be fine, right?

Kaito and Shuichi both try to tell her that would not be remotely okay, but she insists that she doesn’t want them doing anything reckless for her sake. Besides, at least this means that she’ll never have to be replaced, meaning that as long as she’s alive and killing people, none of the other kids from her orphanage (those kids that Kaede played piano for, and that Himiko’s arranged to do a magic show for soon!) will ever have to go through what she did. That’s worth it to her.

(Kaito and Shuichi are still not okay with this, but they don’t push the topic for now.)

 At Himiko’s orphanage magic show, everything is generally adorable and lovely, and Maki uses this to firmly remind herself that these kids’ smiles are what she’s being a murderer for, that it’s fine and she can handle this and nothing needs to change.

But while she’s there for the show, Maki happens to get talking with one of the kids, a girl of around ten or so, and gets the most horrifying pit in her stomach as she realises that the men who recruit assassins have been visiting, and they have their eye on this girl.

They’re replacing Maki anyway. She’s not saving anyone by continuing to be a murderer. Nothing she does as an assassin, not even as the Hope’s Peak-approved Ultimate Assassin, is ever going to make a difference to this cycle of misery.

And, that’s it. That’s the last straw. Maki manages to keep herself together long enough for the magic show to end and Himiko to remain unaware of anything weird, but as soon as they’re alone, she turns to Kaito and Shuichi and begs them to help her end this. She doesn’t want this any more, not for herself or for any of those other kids. Hope’s Peak has shown itself to not give a fuck, so Kaito and Shuichi are the only people she can turn to. She has no idea how they can do something about this – it barely seems possible at all – but that… that’s never stopped Kaito, right!?

As it turns out, Kaito and Shuichi have already been having discussions about how they can help Maki while she wasn’t around (because they knew if they brought it up in front of her she’d just shut them down), so Shuichi has already been thinking about investigating the assassin cult and taking it down that way.

Kaito was still planning on bringing this up to Maki soon and persuading her to let Shuichi help. But he’s so incredibly proud that Maki realised on her own that she didn’t want this anymore and has made the decision to try and change her fate and claw her way towards something that seems impossible! (Of course, she’d never have been able to reach that mindset without everything Kaito’s done for her, but because he didn’t have to push her to take that final step, Kaito probably doesn’t quite realise just how completely thanks to him this is.)

Part 2: the ickiest job

So now we’re basically at the point I described in the beginning of this post. As soon as they graduate from Hope’s Peak, Shuichi gets underway with investigating the assassin cult to prove what it really does and who its members are. Maki has to go back to reporting to them and acting like she works for them for the time being, but she knows it won’t be long until Shuichi ends this.

Kaito put his astronaut training on hold for now just so that he can keep an eye on them both. He has Shuichi keep him updated about the progress of his investigation, and he keeps talking to Maki as often as he can to make sure she’s feeling okay about being suddenly thrust back into that world that she’d almost escaped from. She’s mostly doing fine, but that’s only because she hasn’t received any new hit requests yet.

Until she does. Maki tells herself that this new order is going to be the last one ever, that she’ll only have to kill one more person before Shuichi can save her… and then she sees Shuichi’s name, and everything falls apart.

She can’t refuse the order. She just can’t. The cult is still fully functional and in control of her orphanage – who knows what they would do to those kids (and to that one girl they’ve already got their eye on!) if she refuses. The kids have always been why she’s doing this. She would do anything to keep them safe; she made that promise to herself long ago.

She also knows perfectly well why the cult gave this job to her rather than any of their other assassins with no connection to Shuichi. They wanted to see if she was still capable of doing it, because if she wasn’t, then she’d be compromised and of no use to them any more. If she refused, they’d probably kill her off anyway, despite their agreement with Hope’s Peak.

It’s not like that would even save Shuichi, either – they’d just pass the job onto another of their assassins. And not all of them specialise in painless deaths. Shuichi was already doomed from the moment the cult realised what he was doing and decided he had to die. Surely Maki being the one to do it, as quickly and kindly as she can, is the best way for it to happen?

Who was she kidding thinking she could ever get out of this, anyway? Assassins are always necessary. Her being an assassin has always been necessary. It doesn’t matter what she wants or how she feels. It never mattered. The impossible is just impossible; she should never have allowed herself the luxury of believing any of Kaito’s idealistic nonsense.

Kaito, who reached out to her and still believed in her even after learning the truth about her, and now she’s going to repay that kindness by murdering his best friend. He never should have got close to her and made the mistake of caring about her in the first place, and then Shuichi wouldn’t have put himself in the cult’s way and the two of them could have been just fine without her. She’s just a murderer who only ever hurts people. She never deserved them.

So, as she’s sinking into a pit of utter despair (and I am not using that word lightly here), Maki prepares herself to break into Shuichi’s house at night and kill him in his sleep. That way, at least he’ll never know that his “friend” betrayed him.

Meanwhile, Kaito heard from one of Shuichi’s recent check-ins that at one point he worried his cover might have been blown, but things seem to have been okay for the past few days, so, eh, probably not?

Except… that night, Maki suddenly doesn’t show up to Kaito’s regular mini training sessions to check on how she’s doing. She doesn’t answer his texts or calls when he tries to ask her where she is, either. He might have brushed it off as simply something having come up and her having forgotten to tell him, and also forgotten to charge her phone… but Maki doesn’t forget things like that. Then Kaito remembers what Shuichi told him the other day, and he pieces it together.

and, no, no no no no no, this can’t happen. He won’t let this happen. He’s meant to be their hero, he has to be able to do something about this, he has to.

So Kaito drops everything and just fucking sprints to Shuichi’s house in the middle of the night, his heart in his mouth, begging the stars and the universe and every force of good in the world to let him not be too late.

Maki stands over a sleeping, oblivious Shuichi, trying to convince herself that her hand holding the knife isn’t shaking, that she never had a choice, that she’s just a heartless killer who doesn’t care – only to be snapped out of it by Kaito’s voice yelling her name at the top of his lungs. Not just her name, her nickname: Maki Roll! He knows why she’s here, but she doesn’t want to do this!

And Maki, knowing that she should just finish the job right now and escape out the window before Kaito has to see her do it, finds herself frozen. Shuichi’s awake now, staring at her in bewilderment and fear, no longer blissfully oblivious… and Kaito’s right. She doesn’t want to do this. It shouldn’t matter, but he’s right.

Moments later, Kaito makes it into Shuichi’s bedroom and immediately puts himself between Maki and Shuichi. (Shuichi, having only just woken up, is not only frightened but also extremely confused and is quite happy to just stay behind Kaito where it feels safer for the moment until he can get his brain to process what the hell is going on.)

Kaito makes it very clear that if Maki’s going to kill Shuichi, she’s going to have to kill him, too. He’s not letting either of his sidekicks get hurt.

Maki’s assassin mask is not on so tightly that she can’t realise what Kaito means by those words. He’s not only protecting Shuichi from being killed; he’s trying to protect her from carrying out the act by making it as difficult for her as possible. He still cares about her, even though she was moments away from murdering his best friend. He still believes that she won’t kill him despite what she was about to do to Shuichi. How can he be such an idiot?

But of course Kaito still believes in her; Maki Roll’s his sidekick! – and Maki snaps at him to stop calling her that! She’s not a normal girl; she’s never going to get to be one. He’s doing that thing he does, where he makes her believe that she deserves to be happy, that the impossible can be possible, and maybe it is for him, but it’s not for her; it never was.

This whole time, she’s still brandishing her knife, but it’s like in those sprites of hers – she’s not pointing it at Kaito or Shuichi; she’s just holding it out like some kind of barrier, like she can stop Kaito’s words getting through to her. She can’t falter here, because those kids, that girl – who knows what’d happen to them? And it’d be all her fault, because she was selfish, because she let herself care too much, because Kaito brought that out of her like he never should have done.

But Kaito just smiles and tells her that hey, sure the impossible’s possible for her as well, they’ve just gotta work together to make it so! There’s gotta be a way out of this, too, right, Shuichi?

(because Kaito doesn’t have a goddamn clue how to actually fix this situation beyond putting himself between Maki and Shuichi in this moment so she won’t be able to go through with it, but Shuichi should know a proper way out of this, right? Shuichi always knows what to do.)

Shuichi, having more or less managed to calm his panic enough to understand what’s going on by now, tells her that he’s almost finished with his investigation. He’s pretty sure he only needs a few more days’ work to have everything he needs to take it to the authorities and take down the cult. Then those kids will be safe and Maki won’t have to do anything she doesn’t want to do any more. She just needs to trust him and believe that it’s possible.

While he’s telling her this, Shuichi moves out from behind Kaito, a silent show of the fact that he still trusts her despite what he knows she almost did. He believes just like Kaito does that Maki doesn’t want to do this, that so long as she knows that there is a way out of this, then she’ll be brave enough to take that risk and let him help her.

It works. Maki had already admitted that she didn’t want this life any more before getting the hit request on Shuichi; her mask was hanging on by a thread the whole time she was here and it can’t withstand this. She kind of just breaks and begins to cry – the first time that Kaito and Shuichi have ever seen her do so. Kaito goes to hug her, partly as an excuse to gently take the knife from her, but mostly just because she really, really needs it. She doesn’t resist.

Kaito spends the hug telling her that everything’s going to be okay, not like it’s a reassurance but just like it’s fact, and in that Kaito way he has, he manages to get her to just about believe it herself.

 Part 3: on the run

After Maki’s done sobbing into Kaito’s shoulder, she pulls herself together and gets down to business. The cult will be expecting her to report in that she’s completed the job soon, possibly as early as tomorrow. As soon as they realise she hasn’t and has gone rogue, they’ll send in other assassins to kill both her and Shuichi, so they can’t stay there.

(She’s still worried about what’ll happen to the kids, but Shuichi reassures her that they won’t be able to risk doing anything drastic to them for now, not when they know Shuichi’s onto them and looking for evidence of shady activity. Now of all times is when they’d want to keep pretending to be a perfectly normal orphanage that takes care of its kids. If they’re going to hurt the kids, it’ll happen later, and Shuichi’s going to make sure there won’t be a later for those assholes.)

For the time being, though, Shuichi and Maki are going to have to go into hiding. Shuichi will continue to investigate as best he can from there and Maki can use her knowledge of assassin methods to predict the ways in which the other assassins will be looking for them and keep them both safe.

And Kaito? …Technically he has nothing to do with this; the cult has no reason to want him dead and possibly doesn’t even know he has any connection to Maki or Shuichi beyond Hope’s Peak. He could just walk away from this right here and be safe.

When Maki tries to point this out to him, Kaito just stares at her and says, “Are you stupid or something?” and that’s the end of that.

(Of course she knew he’d be too stubborn to even consider leaving them like this, but she still couldn’t help but try and get him to do so, just because then at least he’d definitely get out of this alive and unhurt.)

So the three of them get the hell out of there, cut all communication with everyone else they know for the time being for their safety, and go into hiding.

(Maki makes Kaito ditch the hairstyle before they leave because it’s way too eye-catching when they need to lay low. He pretends to be indignant at first – surely there’s gotta be some kinda downside to doing that! – but then dutifully sticks his head under Shuichi’s shower for a couple of minutes without complaint.)

Kaito may not have much skill in terms of investigating or physically protecting them, but he’s here for moral support. Which isn’t just a trite excuse to make himself feel important – his friends genuinely need that more than ever.

After all, Shuichi and Maki are both kind of terrified and barely holding it together. Shuichi’s never been in a situation this dangerous before, and he’s anxious enough at the best of times. And Maki’s afraid not just for the three of them but also for the kids – if they don’t succeed, those kids will suffer the consequences too and it’ll be all her fault. So having Kaito there, somehow still managing to be his usual optimistic self, means the world to them right now.

(Kaito is equally terrified, of course. He’s just better than either of them at hiding it, and determined to do so because he knows that they need him to be strong for them, and that this is the only thing he can really do for them in this situation at all.)

Maki is quietly impressed by how strong Kaito’s managing to be for them. She’s always seen him as – well, sure, the friend who changed her life and inspired her to believe things could be better, but also as just a carefree ridiculous idiot who’d never had to go through the kind of horrors from her world. She was never entirely sure whether he’d really be able to stay that optimistic if he experienced anything close to as serious as what she’d been through – not that she ever wanted to have to find that out, of course.

Yet here Kaito is, in this life-or-death situation, still managing to make this seem like it’s just a big adventure where the good guys are obviously going to win, because that’s just how things work!

(And Maki knows full well that there’s no way Kaito’s really that oblivious to how serious the situation is, that he’s doing this on purpose to help them, and that’s… kind of incredible, actually?)

Shuichi’s much less surprised to see Kaito like this, because he’d always been under the impression that Kaito really is this strong. He’d never exactly imagined they’d ever be in this kind of situation, obviously, but even so, it just feels natural somehow that Kaito would be able to do this for them.

Kaito, on his end, is so proud to see how well his sidekicks are holding up. It’s such an incredible sign of Maki’s growth that she’s able to bring herself to fight against the cult and try and escape the reality she’d resigned herself to for so long.

And meanwhile, Kaito never realised Shuichi would be so good in a crisis. Sure, he still seems to be scared, but despite that, he’s able to focus on his task and Get Shit Done in a way that Kaito himself feels utterly lost with right now. This is the first time in this universe that Kaito has really found himself not only being proud of Shuichi, but almost… looking up to him?

(Oh you poor innocent UTDP Kaito, you have no idea.)

Being Kaito, he is also significantly underestimating the extent to which Maki and Shuichi are only able to be this strong because he’s there supporting them, despite the fact he’s very deliberately trying to do that for them and knows that it’s the only thing he’s really contributing here.

I’m not sure precisely how things go while they’re on the run, because the exact plot logistics of how Shuichi can investigate the assassin cult are not a thing I’m great at figuring out. (This is part of the reason why I won’t actually write this as a fic, aside from just not having the time.)

I’m here for the character stuff, so I’ve mostly been thinking about the quiet moments in between the detective espionage where the three of them are relatively safe together in whatever hideout they’re using. Kaito would, of course, still insist on training sessions each night – at least as much as is possible while they’re trying to stay inconspicuous and keep an eye out for enemies – and they’d be able to use those as moments to collect their thoughts and reflect on the situation.

Maki would feel awful for the fact that Kaito and Shuichi are putting themselves in this much danger just to help her. When Kaito notices she seems bothered about something that isn’t just the situation itself and prods this out of her, she’d try to insist that it’d have been better if they’d never met her and befriended her in the first place, and then they wouldn’t even know or care that child assassins like her are suffering because nobody was ever supposed to know or care.

Kaito scoffs at that idea completely. He’s a hero! Obviously he’s here to save people who are weak and suffering, so of course he should have befriended Maki in order to be able to help her and those kids like they’re doing now. What kind of idiot is she being to think he wouldn’t have wanted to do this from the start!?

Shuichi, being rather more realistic about things, admits that of course he’s really scared right now and a part of him wishes he hadn’t got wrapped up in this. But still, Kaito (and Kaede, and others) helped him realise during their time at Hope’s Peak how much he cares about helping people, and that he can use his detective skills to do that – so he’s really proud that he’s able to use his detective skills right now to literally save lives, both for Maki and those other kids. So yes, he’s scared… but he doesn’t have any regrets either.

Maki is also still hung up on and feeling awful about the part where she nearly murdered Shuichi. She can’t stop thinking that she might have actually gone through with it if Kaito hadn’t got there in time.

Shuichi hesitantly tells her that he doesn’t think she would have done – at least, he doesn’t want to think so. He saw the look in her eyes as she was standing over him when Kaito’s voice woke him up, and thinking on it now, he’s pretty sure that wasn’t the look of someone who could have done it.

(Shuichi doesn’t consider, however, that that was after Kaito’s voice woke him up, and Kaito’s voice was what started to take Maki’s mask down, too.)

Kaito insists it just doesn’t matter. He did get there in time, and she didn’t kill Shuichi because she didn’t truly want to, and so there’s no point getting worked up about possibilities when they’re not what actually happened and are never going to happen now.

(He wants to tell himself that he believes Maki still wouldn’t have done it anyway, that her better nature would have broken through and stopped her without his help. But, then again, would he really have run so desperately to Shuichi’s place like he had if he’d truly believed that? Kaito doesn’t voice that thought.)

Maki then brings up the fact that there’s always the possibility she could still kill Shuichi right now and potentially get herself and the kids out of this situation safely. How on earth can either of them truly trust that she won’t after she almost did so before?

Kaito’s answer is simple – because he wants to! He wants to believe that she’s stronger than that, that she can believe Shuichi will save them and isn’t going to give up and take the coward’s way out. After all, she’s his sidekick, and of course a sidekick of his is capable of facing something like this with courage! She already showed that when she stopped herself before!

Shuichi agrees that he wants to believe in Maki – because she’s his friend. He knows that he wouldn’t want to kill his friends if he were in Maki’s shoes, and would try as hard as he could to find some other way out, so he wants to believe that Maki feels the same way.

Maki relents and accepts that they really mean that and really aren’t scared of her in this situation at all. After all, she wants to believe that she’s stronger than that, too – and if they believe in her that much, despite everything, then maybe she really is that strong after all.

They are friends. That’s the core of this whole story – these three friends who are so scared of losing each other and of losing themselves, just desperately holding onto each other and protecting each other through this terrifying situation. Shuichi’s detective skills are necessary to take down the cult and end this; Maki’s assassin skills are necessary to protect them while he’s doing this; Kaito’s luminary skills are necessary because without his support Shuichi and Maki would both fall apart. (And without Kaito’s friendship over their time at Hope’s Peak, neither of them would have even dreamed of trying to do this, that it was even possible to take down the cult and give Maki a happy ending in the first place.) They need each other and they are FRIENDS and I love them so much.

Part 4: the end

I’m not quite sure precisely how things would end, because aaaa plot logistics again. But one way or another, they succeed in taking down the cult and get out alive. One universe in which even one of these friends dies is more than enough and I’m not about to make another.

Maybe during some kind of final showdown, Kaito makes an unthinking reckless leap to protect Maki, which succeeds, but he ends up getting shot in his left arm because of it. I dunno, I just think the parallel to what happens to him in canon would be neat.

While everyone is otherwise fine, Maki feels guilty that they didn’t all get out unhurt. Now Kaito’s going to have to postpone starting his astronaut training for several months while his injury heals and it’s all because of her. Kaito literally could not care less, though; this is the most insignificant price to pay for Maki and Shuichi and those kids being safe.

Maki keeps insisting that it’s not okay, that he shouldn’t have got hurt on her account, and in Kaito’s increasingly fervent attempts to get her to drop it, he kind of accidentally blurts out that this is nothing because he was ready to die for them if he needed to.

When Shuichi and Maki press him on that, he clams up and doesn’t elaborate. He meant what he said, but that’s all there is to it, stop talking about it, guys.

(Kaito spent enough time while on the run thinking about how he couldn’t bear to lose Shuichi and Maki, such that he realised he would rather die trying to protect them than live knowing that he’d failed to do so. He has no regrets about having decided that, but… he’s kind of shaken up by the thought of it. It’s the first time in his life he’s really properly thought about his own mortality, not just in the sense that life is short and you never know what might happen (guess who lost his parents to a car crash), but in terms of being genuinely prepared to die if it should ever become necessary. He’s always been so fiercely determined to live his life to the fullest; it’s… weird to know that he would have willingly cut it short. That he’d have been the one to prevent himself from ever making it into space.)

(Oh you poor innocent UTDP Kaito, you have no idea, again.)

Long story short, they’re all safe and free to live out the rest of their lives now, but they’re also just a liiiiittle bit traumatised by this.

Kaito would of course try to hide the fact that any of this got to him, just like he hid how scared he was while it was actually happening, because they need him to help with their trauma and how could he do that if they knew he was struggling too?

Kaito’s outburst about being ready to die for them and the way he was uncomfortable and cagey about it afterwards would give Shuichi and Maki an inroad to realise that something’s up with him, though. So one way or another, with enough prodding and reassurance, they’d eventually be able to get through to him and make him realise that it’s okay to show weakness to them and it doesn’t make him any less inspiring of a hero. 

(Yes, it’s me; I couldn’t resist finding a way to put that outcome in this AU too. Kaito deserves to get over his issues and learn not to be an idiot about this no matter what universe he’s in.)

So they’ll all be okay in the end. Even Kaito.

Regardless of their newfound issues that they’re having to work through, both Kaito and Shuichi firmly agree that it was worth it. They’d have taken twice this amount of pain if that was the only way they could save Maki and all those kids like her from ever having to go through even worse trauma ever again.

Kaito’s a hero, after all! – and this whole thing has made Shuichi realise more than ever, after Kaito points it out to him, that maybe he can be a hero too.

(Alternatively, instead of this ending described here, maybe Kaito has a considerably worse time than just getting shot in the arm.)