#for real though just finished up the doc and my super awesome amazing boy best friend will give it a read and once I get his feedback-

[razzledazzletrassh]

NEW FIC TOMORROW MAYHAPS? BLINK BLINKITY BLINK?

[residentlesbrarian]

The Second Book I Read In the Dark: Another YA superhero novel for me to squeal over forever...YES, Please! Gimme Gimme!

Dreadnought by April Daniels

So Day 1 in the dark continues onward and I have already finished 1 of my 3 library books with still so much day left so what else to do but soldier forward and continue without pause. Well there was a short pause for delicious chicken soup cooked on a blessedly gas powered range (never gonna live in a house with an electric range; I swear this thing has saved our butts in so many power outages), but I digress; I was ready! This time I was taking a break from the whimsical and witchy and diving head first into all things super with an extra heroic twist. 

I had heard so many good things about this book for so long but again it had fallen to the wayside of other distractions (a rainbow montage of movie and TV show gays runs back and forth through my head like the migrating fandom flamingoes). What finally made me make the decision to buckle down and do the thing was a video review done by one of my favorite YouTubers, Dominic Noble (Video Linked below). I love his series Lost in Adaptation, because as an avid reader I too find myself appalled by what Hollywood often does to my favorite books. Hearing him talk about Dreadnought was just the push my flighty brain needed to say, “Fine! Alright! We haven’t utterly obsessed over a teenage superhero book in like 6 months since we near bludgeoned our girlfriend with Not Your Sidekick! Fine! Let’s do it!” So...yeah if this intro is anything to go by this should be a fun one! Let’s dive right in shall we!

Unicorn Rating:

Blurb: She just wanted to paint her toenails in peace but then a superhero had to go and die and give Danny the one thing she never thought she’d have...her proper body. Now if only everyone else felt that way too. Life just got awesome and really really complicated all at once! Oh yeah and she can fly now. Bonus!

Disclaimer: I will try my best to not spoil anything from the book, but my book loving rambles may give more away than a traditional review. Here we go! Ramble time!

Review: 

Holy crap! After the last book this was exactly what I needed! This book was just...so good! The plot...the characters...the world...everything about it just pulls you in and doesn’t let you go. Now I may have felt that way because I didn’t have anything trying to pull me away from this book but I don’t think I would have been easily pulled away if there had been distractions. And so many facets of this story were things I didn’t expect because I had never seen them portrayed before. Like the fact Danny having to deal with the rampant day to day sexism of being a woman now that her appearance matches who she really is. I’ve never seen that in a book before and I absolutely loved it! I was so dedicated to Danny’s story from page 1 it’s ridiculous, and look at that, a perfect segue into the phenomenal characters of this book...look what I did there switching it up going out of order on ya...gotta keep ya on your toes.

Our protagonist Danny is such a phenomenal example of a genuine kind caring person who is also deeply scarred and angry. It was so amazing to read a character that was flawed and struggling and doesn’t see how much a hero she really is and the small moments when others take that double take and go, “You’re the real deal, huh?” But those moments just confuse the living hell outta Danny cause she’s just Danny, she got super powers as a fluke. She is also hilarious and courageous and smart but knows she isn’t perfect and has weaknesses. She may be the strongest person on earth physically now but she acknowledges that that isn’t everything someone needs. Danny is such a good bean, but she has issues and that isn’t glossed over which is so rare. Now the next thing I want to touch on is a very tough subject but is very prevalent in the book so I wouldn’t be a very prudent reviewer if I didn’t bring it up. Danny is, without question, an abused child. This isn’t even really a spoiler, it alludes pretty heavily to it in the blurb, but what I’m gonna touch on next does dip into that territory so I’m gonna break it into a new LONG paragraph so just scroll on by if you don’t want to read this bit.

So at one point in the book Danny mentions a health screening at school that revealed she had hearing damage in her right ear that has now been healed by the mantle of Dreadnought. At the time of the screening she didn’t realize why until her dad had another Mount Vesuvius day and she assumed her usual position of curling in on herself and turning her head to the left so he would yell into only her right ear. Now how loud and how often do you have to yell into someone’s ear to cause permanent hearing damage? I don’t know and honestly I don’t want to know. Why am I highlighting an overall tiny moment...because for me this moment jumped out and gut punched me. Brought literal tears to my eyes. Tears of pain. Tears of rage. Tears of hate. I’m a weepy bitch when I get emotional. I’ve read a lot of books that try and portray abuse and how Daniels wrote Danny’s abuse from her father took my breath away because it felt so real. There weren’t really any good days, there were bad days, there were really bad days, but most days were just anxiously waiting for the next bad day, because Danny knew there would always be a next bad day. Something that did surprise me was my feelings about Danny’s mother. I knew going in I would hate her father, before even meeting him I hated him, but her mother, that was a hate that lay dormant until it exploded onto the scene and froze me to my core. I’m not gonna get into my own demons here but there is one thing I cannot abide by and that is people turning a blind eye while someone abuses another. Danny’s mother is the textbook definition of someone who “goes along to get along”, she will do just about anything to keep the peace, but at what cost? Instead of protecting her child from someone who literally screamed so long and so loud at her child that it damaged her hearing she just sat back and let them. That’s not the worst though, no, after Danny’s transition her mom seems to be understanding of the fact she is happy being a girl and is buying her things she needs like bras and undeniably feminine shoes, only to reveal it was all to keep Danny docile so she wouldn’t cause more fights with her dad. That to me is unforgivable. Not worse than the abuse of the father, but still undeniably selfish. She never cared about Danny or listened to her and what she was really saying. She just didn’t want there to be anymore fighting. Well I’m sorry, but sometimes, as a mother, you should fight to protect your goddamn child when someone is hurting them. The last thing I’ll say before going back to the more spoiler free and fun part of the review is that the fact Danny can never make herself say she is being abused hits so close to home for me. As a reader looking in from outside, there was a scene with a member of the Legion that I felt like, as an abuse survivor myself, I was standing there begging Danny to accept her invitation. To get out of that house. To get away from her father. To see what he was doing for what it was. But I knew she wouldn’t, she wasn’t ready, and it broke my heart to watch her fly away.

Anyway moving on from all that heavy stuff lets talk about other things like some freaking superheroes and one particular vigilante. We have the Legion members: Doc Impossible, Valkyrja, Magma, Graywytch, Chlorophyll, and Carapice. Now How do I want to talk about these characters...in what order...hmmm...how about from best to worst. Okay? Okay. Great! 

I freaking love Doc Impossible! She is a character that from the moment I met her she gave me ‘kookie grandma’ character vibes and I get DOWN with kookie grandma characters. Now I know she isn’t a grandma character nor is she particularly crazy in the way she acts; it's just a vibe I get from her that I love. Now one thing I do want to say without spoiling anything is how Doc is one of the few characters that never tries to take away Danny’s agency in everything that happens around her in all this superhero craziness. Danny can always be her own person and most importantly a kid around Doc, and I feel Danny really needed that. I will stop myself now because I could go on for hours about Doc and how much I LOVE HER!

Next up we get a two for one, Valkyrja and Magma. We don’t see much of them but what we do get is pretty good. They are adult superheroes who have their own priorities surrounding what is going on with Danny, but aren’t mean or cruel and seem to genuinely care about Danny. Valkyrja is funny and surprisingly down to earth even though she is basically a scandinavian goddess of sorts. Also the hilarity of her being Danny’s long time celebrity crush never gets old. Oh Danny, you useless little lesbian. Magma is a precious big hot boy that seems like he’d give good hugs. Yeah, that's about all I got to say about him that won’t spoil anything. 

Now we have another two for one with Chlorophyll and Carapice. These two I'm between dislike and indifferent on.  They weren’t outright mean to Danny but they treated her more like a means to an end or down right refused to acknowledge she was the new Dreadnought whether they liked it or not, but we didn’t really get to see them enough to really learn more about their motivations. 

Finally to round out the Legion we have Graywytch. Excuse me while I get this out. *Exaggerated throat clear.* First of all, Imma slap that stupid robe of ya stupid head. Then Imma stab you with your stupid fancy atheme you like to wave around all the time. And don’t even start on your “Typical male, always resorting to violence” shtick, cause guess what, I’m a ciswoman and I still wanna stomp a mudhole in your ass. And for that...Imma slap your dumb bird too. *Deep breath in. Looooooong exhale.* Sorry about that. Mama had to express some rage. I have never had a hate-sink character that made me feel the fiery flames of rage quite like Graywytch...obviously. Her treatment of Danny had me gripping the book tightly and growling about slapping birds and “shanking bitches” more than I should probably admit. She is one of those characters that I love how much I hate her. She served the exact purpose she was meant to and it was never cast in a light that she may be right in her treatment of Danny, we are always aware that her mindset is ridiculous. Like the fact outside of her parents Graywytch is the only character to blatantly deadname and misgender Danny. To go off on a small tangent here I may relate too much here because I have a younger brother who is trans (don’t worry he is fine with me discussing it in reviews and such) and I went to a graduation party when my best friend graduated medical school and he was out to the family but not extended friends yet. After only referring to him by the proper pronouns for so long at home hearing the wrong ones caused legitimate eye blinking record scratch cognitive dissonance for me. I had the same feeling anytime Graywytch opened her stupid mouth and blatantly misgendered Danny. Because the way this is written Danny is Danny, she is exactly who she is meant to be. Suck it Graywytch!

Okay, I know you probably want to hear about the plot I know, but we have one more character we have to talk about and that is Calamity, the rootin’-ist tootin’-ist vigilante that ever did come through these here parts. Sorry, I have to talk like this now, it’s part of the persona, you have to commit to the persona. But real talk, I absolutely love Calamity as a look into “graycapes” and the real dive into the world of superheroes beyond the big heroes. We get to see how someone who doesn’t have the backing of the Legion goes about helping people, the little people, those that maybe the Legion way up in their tower can’t see from so high up in the clouds. And y’all know me, I love a morally gray vigilante with a heart of gold.  She had me at “You wanna go capin’?”

Now obviously I couldn’t get enough of the characters but the plot was pretty darn good too. It was so intricately woven in with Danny and her inheriting the mantle from the previous Dreadnought that she had no choice but to be an integral part of it. Now I obviously don’t have as much to say about the plot as I did the characters but know if you come for the plot you won’t be disappointed. It kept me guessing and threw me for an absolute curve ball at the end that I did not see coming! You won’t be disappointed.

So final thoughts...there isn’t much more I can say without going on an hours long squeal fest about how much I freaking loved this book and the characters and the intricacies of how Danny’s powers work and how she was written and how she interacts with different characters and just everything that would mean massive untakebackable spoilers! So I will end on this note; Danny is a character that it would have been easy to lean into the superhero aspect and let the reader forget that she was trans, but April Daniels didn’t want that. Danny was gifted the easiest transition in the history of the world. What takes most people years of HRT and surgeries and therapy Danny did in the passing of a mantle, but it never took away the fact she is and always will be trans. It was a unique reading experience that I have only been blessed with once before but that’s a story for a different review on a different day.

Queer Wrap-up: I would give my left kidney (that’s my good one btw) to give this book five unicorns, but alas I cannot, a one off conversation in an elevator hinting that a certain improbable doctor may have a one sided thing for a particular sadly straight scandinanvian god being is just not enough to count as additional rep. As much as I love this book, and I love it A LOT! We only have Danny as our queer rep and she is fantastic rep and our protagonist so a 4 unicorn rating was a no brainer on this one. Danny is the kind of trans rep I want to see more of in the world of books, YA and otherwise. Being a trans lesbian is a huge part of her character but she gets to do so much more than that in the breath of the story and that’s what I look for in great representation, so Danny easily earned these 4 unicorns on her own merit just being her amazing self.

Links: 

Goodreads

Dominc Noble’s Review

Alright so...this one got long. Ah hell, I ain't gonna apologize for it! This is a damn good book and I wanted to get my fangirl squeal on y’all. 

Oh no, I think I’ve been thinking about Calamity too much I slipped into the persona without meaning to! This book was just far too much fun to read to the point I started reading it out loud with a full cast of voices (hint: the Calamity parts were my favorite) because it flowed so well and was genuinely so funny at parts and heart wrenchingly sad in others and so action packed the next moment. I finished this book in less than a day and if I had been more present and not under a pile of blankets and wearing a headlamp I might have thought to keep a timer to tell you the exact number of hours it took me, but alas know it didn’t take me many. 

So the adventures reading in the dark continue on to the next review after this one but as always if you want to read this but don’t want to spend the money without knowing for sure you are going to like it, go to your local library. You’d be surprised what they have on their shelves just waiting to be discovered. Trust me, I’m a lesbrarian.

[hellzyeahthewebwieldingavenger]

Have you ever gone on the Spider-Man ride at Universal?

Have I ever gone on the Amazing Adventures of Spider-Man ride at Universal’s Islands of Adventure theme park in Florida?

That thing that I have a 2001 photo of near my bed and have had it there since 2001?

Er...only like 8 times!

Sit down and let me spin you a tale.

Long before there was a Spider-Man movie, long before I knew there was GOING to be one, I found out about the ride at like age 9-10.

It then became my life’s dream to go on that ride. And I do mean dream because I lived in England and my family at the time were living with my grandparents home as we slowly built our new house, a feat that took 2 years so we didn’t have the cash to spare on a big holiday like that.

One of the most crushing childhood memories I have is when there were vague discussions of a holiday to Florida with our closest family friends. But that fell through and I had to live with almost  getting to go on that ride. I eagerly scoured our family friends’ holiday photos for a mere glimpse of the Spider-Man ride but nothing!

Remember this was the late 1990s/early 2000s, there was no Youtube and your internet connection was a joke, even if I knew how to use it.

But by the Summer of 2001 we’d finished our new home and moved out. And we finally decided to go to Florida with our family friends...and two other groups of family friends for a two-week mega vacation hitting all the Disney and Universal parks and other tourist attractions (which for us included a bona fide American ‘mall’).

I enjoyed Disney’s MGM studios and Animal Kingdom, but I was waiting for the day we’d hit up Islands of Adventure. 

And then the day finally came and I was sure something was going to go wrong and get in my way.

First it was the lines to get into the park.

Then it was being confronted by some admittedly well meaning actors portraying Boris and Natasha from Rocky and Bullwinkle, trying to engage me in conversation when I just. Wanted. To. Get. To. Spider-Man!

And when I finally arrived at SUPER HERO ISLAND it seemed insane. For some reason in my child’s mind the idea of a theme park where every corner you looked and built into the street itself you’d see Disney characters, made sense.

But to see that for my heroes, the Marvel characters just didn’t seem real. Remember this was 2001, the Marvel Universe wasn’t as well known to the public (especially not in England). So whilst I  had of course learned about it from all the 90s Marvel cartoons, no one else I knew could instantly recognize like Doctor Doom.

But here I was seeing Jim Lee inspired art of him, Storm, the Hulk and a gigantic Bagley image of Spider-Man in front of THE Daily Bugle!

But alas...the Spider-Man line was immense. 

So we got a fast pass and arranged it to come back later and in the meantime I got to be traumatized by the Jurassic Park water drop ride. I was in the front seat age 10 with a T-rex approaching me and then...the ride stopped. Technical difficulties. In fact MOST rides that summer were having technical difficulties.

So we were stuck a T-rex looming over us. Unnoticed by me everyone else on the ride seemed to take a grip and bow their heads. I didn’t get why until it was too late and my eyes sharply turned from the T-rex to the like 60 foot high sheer drop as the ride came down with a splash.

Far less traumatic was getting a photo and autographs with the various superheroes and villains who showed up at Marvel’s Super Hero Island. Of course I got to meet the real Spider-Man...and my mother asked how Mary jane was.

His reply:

You’d have to ask Peter Parker about that

Fucking A.

Anyway, finally, finally, finally we got in the fast pass line for the ride. Which still wasn’t THAT fast but still we weren’t baking alive in the summer heat. And as a bonus I got to take in the surroundings of the Daily Bugle and the 1994 inspired animated shorts made for the ride explaining the whole story behind it (including my first ever look at Scream, a brand new symbiote I’d never even known about!).

Then we got to the ride. It was thrilling, the best feeling of my life. I was on an adventure with my hero Spider-Man! And we were all falling through the roof tops, spinning around and then...

We are sorry to inform you we are experiencing technical difficlties

The ride just stopped DEAD. 

In hindsight I suppose it was all too appropriate.

I wanted to experience what it was like to be Spider-Man and now I was going through some typical Parker luck!

A few minutes elapsed before we all yelled because a literal burst of flame exploded nearby us, the ride had started again.

It finished up and I don’t think I’d ever been happier in my life.

But I was about to be because due to the technical difficulties...we got to go again without lining up!

Whilst my family, friends and family friends in attendance enjoyed the ride well enough (except for my friend’s Dad, he’s always had chronic back pains) they all knew this day, this moment, was for me!

And it wasn’t quite over yet.

As we walked down the corridor towards the gift shop we saw...the Green Goblin!

It was a lifesized statue standing just besides the doorway to the gift shop, presumably set up so people could get photos with him.

Well, he was my favourite villain so I had to. I stood beside the statue and posed when...he came to life!

It was one of the actors who’d accompanied the heroes on their periodic arrivals to the Super Hero Island for photos and autographs.

Somehow this was less traumatic than the Jurassic Park ride. I asked for his autograph and he obliged, plunking his pumpkin bomb bean bag onto my head to free up his hands.

Fucking awesome.

And this didn’t even cover the gift shop itself.

I’d never seen so much Spider-Man STUFF in the same place at the same time. I got myself a Green Goblin action figure from the now defunct (but fondly remembered by Marvel Toy historians) Spider-Man Classics line of toys and picked up my very, very first trade paperback (before I even knew that’s what it was!)

Spider-Man’s greatest Villains

It was an eclectic collection of single issues (and one annual) spotlighting an individual villain. Doc Ock, Mysterio, Kingpin, Electro, Hobgoblin, Vulture and mah boys Carnage and Venom (drawn by McFarlane himself, in my first exposure to his work, it left a major impression!)

Being a child f the 1990s and specifically the 1994 cartoon (which was the most recent and influential adaptation at the time, merchandise for it abounding in the store) Venom and Carnage were among my absolute favourite...things in life basically.

I wasn’t alone because just about every Spider-Fan my age loved them too. Hence why getting toys based on them proved elusive for me. And Spider-Man’s bad ass super mega ultra cool black costume even moreso. I’d long resigned myself that getting that toy was just a pipe dream and I’d missed my window for it long ago...Less than 15 minutes after leaving the gift shop my Dad got me this:

There were at least two other stores around the area of the Spider-Man ride and one of them sold toys and other collectibles.

Not only did I fulfill another childhood dream of having a black costume Spider-Man, but the toy even came with a SYMBIOTE toy too! And it was super posable, unlike all my other toys, including my Spider-Man ones.

AND...it came with a reprint of ASM #252, the debut of the black costume itself by DeFalco and Frenz and starring Black Cat too. An all round awesome issue and one of the first classic Spider-Man stories I ever got to read.*

The other of the two nearby stores was what an older me would call a relatively modest LCS, as it wasn’t that big of a store and sold ONLY comics and trades.

But you have to understand, 10 year old me had NEVER been inside an LCS. The idea that so many comics could be in the same place and that a store JUST selling them could exist was akin to the Cave of Wonders from Aladdin, something that could only ever exist, not just in America (the land where Spider-Man and all those other characters I loved, were from) but specifically there on Super Hero Island.

The rest of the day was pretty fun. 

My friend somehow coerced her mother and mine to go on the Incredible Hulk roller coaster which I believe at the time was the tallest roller coaster in America, with this savage twist in the middle of it and a net to catch keys and other falling items.

We went on the Popeye ride, one of those rubber dingy rides that is supposed to splash you a lot and...I do not know if I’ve ever felt more wet in my life.

All in all it was a good day and I vividly remember being in one of the restaurants on the boulevard leading up to the theme park (a Three Supremes themed place for some reason, with wax statues of the band nearby our table) just pouring over my new toys, my new comics and my experience.

Best day of my life up until then!

Hell the ‘after party’ when we finally got back to England was awesome too. My beloved grandmother had bought me the latest issue of Astonishing Spider-Man that I wasn’t able to pick up whilst I was away. Who was the villain of the story? 

Carnage!...Also Silver Surfer was there and he was pretty cool too.

It wasn’t the last time I went on the ride though.

My family and family friends made it an annual tradition between about 2002-2008 to spend the Christmas holidays in America and every year up until 2006 we spent some time in Orlando, meaning I got to check out the Spider-Man ride at least once every year and pick up a new trade and a bona fide original American comic book (not a reprint!) off the stands.**

So to answer your question definitively, yes I have indeed gone on the Spider-Man ride at Universal. I’ve done so many times and the ride and location are incredibly special to me.

*When I say classic I mean anything from before like 1995 because the stories I’d been reading in my UK reprint magazine, Astonishing Spider-Man, were all from 1995-1998, except for when they specifically spotlighted an older comic and referred to it as a classic. To me a classic was anything with ‘older art’.

**This experience led to me getting one of my favourite stories ever, Revenge of the Green Goblin, the second JMS trade with the 9/11 issue and Aunt May and Peter’s conversation, and also Kraven’s Last Hunt and Spider-Man Torment.

I fondly remember reading KLH whilst walking between rides and shows in Islands of Adventure and Universal Studios, I even remember I was reading part 2 or 3 at like a Wild West show at the latter after dark and somehow this added to the atmosphere of the story.

Torment was a different experience. I’d seen the cover, I knew and loved McFarlane’s art and the story turned out to be a sequel to KLH to my delight. But I had a really bad stomach bug during that particular vacation and Torment helped me get through it. Half because it was a Spider-Man story I loved reading and half because the pain of my bug led me to relate to Peter’s pain in that story.