#for my mutuals who are 18+ sorry?? We dont gotta talk

[runaxee]

Maybe I should mention that I'm 15... with 15 y/o humor....

Mb yall might ruin yalls fav cartoon characters w my very normal humor...

Two more months......

[krosiefics]

i like it • lee minho

MDNI 18+

Synopsis: Minho and you are best friends, one night that changes. What happens when both catch feelings but one’s afraid of love? (Inspired by I Like It by Stray Kids)

WC: 3.9k

Tags: smut, angst, friends to fwb to lovers, afab!reader, jealousy, cursing, fear of loving someone, mutual pinning, situationship, hiding feelings, oneshot, fwb concept, friends to lovers. I’m probably forgetting more, I'm sorry.

MDNI tags under cut

MDNI Warnings: softdom!minho, piv, unprotected sex (plz dont),thigh riding -if you squint-, grinding, fingering (f. receiving), creampie, missionary…probably forgetting some

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“Yah, wait up!” Minho called out to you. Turning around, you waited for your best friend to catch up. “What?” “Ice cream?”

“We’ve gotta study dumbass.” You grimace continuing to walk, midterms were coming up and you weren’t about to fail. “Jeez, you’re so boring.” Minho pouts, flailing his arms in defeat. “Midterms are at the end of the week, and if I don’t pass I could lose my scholarship.” You frown, trying to make him understand, though you’ve told him countless times before.

“I know, I know.” The brown haired boy sighed, “Your place or mine?” You glanced over at the boy who spoke, “Why the fuck would we go to yours?” You furrow your brows, a small chuckle leaving your mouth. “Because you love my cats.” Minho tilts his head in a matter-of-factly way. “I don’t get how you haven’t been caught with them in your apartment yet.” Minho simply shrugs, not even he knows how the landlord hasn’t found out.

The two of you round the corner of the dorm building. Climbing up the stairs to the floor where your apartment is. You unlock the door, allowing Minho to follow in behind you. You settle your things down on the counter, Minho does the same with his backpack. Studying, reading, writing, and a little talking is all that happened that night. Minho had dozed off to sleep by the time it was midnight, laying his body on the small sofa in your studio apartment. You powered through till about two in the morning before plopping over on the floor.

~

Midterms were finally over and you thankfully passed. Minho passed too, though he barely studied he still managed to pass all of his classes.

“Yo Min! Y/N!” A familiar voice called out to you and your best friend as you walked out of the main hall at the university. Jisung ran up to the both of you excitedly, “Party at mine tonight!” Jisung beamed before running off to tell more of his friends that were walking into the main hall.

“Party?” Minho smirked at you, nudging your side with his elbow. You simply shook your head disapprovingly. “Oh c’mon! We passed, we get to celebrate now!” Minho pouted, you stared at his face, eyes trailing down to his lips, noticing how soft and plump they looked. You realize what you’re doing, praying that Minho hadn’t noticed- he didn’t- your cheeks warmed at your thoughts. “Fine, party.” You mumbled in agreeance, walking away from the situation before you dwelled on it for too long.

You kept dwelling on it. Even after going your separate ways to get ready for Jisung’s party. Your mind still thought about his lips, your best friend’s lips. The more you thought about it the more your thoughts developed. How soft were they? Were they rough? Was he a good kisser?

By the time you knew it, Minho was already knocking at your front door, waiting to pick you up.

“Going!” You quickly glanced in the mirror, your face was red, walking out of the bathroom to the door, hoping the strange redness could pass off for over blushing. You open the door before quickly turning around, grabbing your things before heading straight out the door. “Yah, I didn’t even get to step inside!” You kept walking, your thoughts swirling around in your brain were too distracting.

Minho raced after you down the stairs and to his car. He unlocked the car and opened the door, like he usually does, before heading to his side, getting in and turning on the black sedan. At that moment he realized something. “Are you okay?” Minho worried, his hand touched your arm lightly. “You’re super red.”

You squeezed your eyes shut before shaking your head, “I’m fine just over blushed.” You lied, your cheeks reddened even more, though this time from embarrassment and not from unholy thoughts about your best friend’s lips.

Minho retracted his hand, unbeknownst to you his palms were sweating and his heart was racing. He put the car in drive and drove off to Jisung and Changbin’s apartment.

~

It was loud, obnoxiously loud. Music about sex was blaring through the speakers, people were making out on the couch and in the corners of the living room, the very same living room that was trashed with food and plastic cups everywhere. You swore you saw a couple humping each other at one point. Your senses were overloaded. You hated this, you wanted to go home.

“Hey Y/N! I didn’t know you were gonna be here!” A deep voice boomed from your right, looking towards the voice you see Felix and Chan smiling like idiots, clearly already drunk. “How’s it goin’ I haven’t seen you since orientation.” Chan had helped you out during orientation day, he was your upperclassman, though he never treated you as if he was of some sort of higher class. “I’m good, what about you two?” You shout over the music.

Chan nods, giving you a thumbs up. “Good, kinda wanting to get laid though. Anyone caught your eye yet?” Felix chuckles, his eyes scanning the room as if he had some people in mind.

You shake your head at his question. Though you follow his gaze, scanning the room as well until you land on one specific person, Minho. The brown haired boy was holding a red plastic cup, most likely filled with some sort of alcohol, he brought the cup up to his lips and- there it is…those thoughts flooded your mind again as you stared at his lips. You suddenly were brought out of your daze by the smile he gave you, you immediately flushed…did he just catch you staring at his lips?!

Avoiding his gaze, you turn to Chan and notice him staring at you already. You hadn’t even noticed Felix walking off to talk to Changbin. Chan’s eyes flickered down to your lips, he chucked awkwardly, “Sorry, your lips are so pretty, I kinda got distracted.” You couldn’t think anymore, too many things were bombarding your brain. You acted before you could even think as you sealed your lips on his, hoping to distract yourself from whatever fucking mental disaster is happening to you right now.

Minho was still looking at you when you kissed Chan. His eyes automatically darkened as he stared at the two of you making out. His jaw clenched when Chan brought his hand to your hips, squeezing at the flesh there, the flesh that he’s always wanted under his fingers. He fisted his hands as you wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him closer as he guided you to the wall, gently pressing you against it. Oh fuck no was this happening, not on his watch.

Minho stormed over, snatching your hand from Chan, pulling you out of his hold so quickly that you couldn’t even say anything before you were at least twenty feet away from Chan. “Hey Min! What the fuck!”

“We’re leaving.” Minho huffed out angrily, he shoved his way through the crowd and made his way out of the apartment, dragging you with him.

“I was about to get laid! Now who’s the boring one.”

“Just get in the fucking car Y/N-“ Minho softened his voiced realizing he was starting to raise it, “Please.”

You couldn't think, and quite frankly you couldn’t care to think. The frustrated boy opened the car door for you, his jaw still clenched. Frankly you didn’t want to piss him off more, so you just entered the car. The drive to your apartment was quiet, a heavy tension settling between the two of you.

You wondered why he suddenly got so ticked and bothered. Did he actually notice you staring at his lips? Was it the kiss? Why would the kiss bother him? By the time Minho pulled into your apartment complex’s parking lot, you were still overthinking. Today has been so weird. You thought to yourself, mentally cursing yourself for all the things you’ve thought and done today. The door suddenly opening brought you out of your mind, you never even noticed Minho turning off the car nor getting out.

Minho walked you to your front door. You felt awkward with this strange tension, sure you’ve fought before but there’s never been this kind of tension between you before. You glance over at the dark haired boy who had immediately walked and plopped down on the sofa. “Min?” You call softly, making your way next to Minho’s spot on the sofa. He pinched the bridge of his nose, face scrunched deep in thought. “What’s wrong?” You sigh, resting your hand on his forearm. Minho simply shook his head, dismissing your question.

“Min?” You frown, wanting to understand why he suddenly dragged you away like that, “It’s nothing, just fucking drop it!” Minho exclaimed. “Okay, what the fuck is happening?!” You pull your hand away, now you’re getting pissed. “First you get pissed and drag me out of the party after I was so close to getting laid, and now you won’t tell me why you dragged me outta there!” “I told you it’s nothing!” He protested, “If it was ‘nothing’ you wouldn’t be here yelling about it being ‘nothing’! You’re just jealous I was gonna get-“

You were cut off mid-sentence as Minho’s lips found yours. His lips move roughly against yours, his hands grabbing at your hips. You gasp at his action, pushing him away. “Fuck, I was jealous.” He admitted, hs face flushed red, “I don’t know why, I didn’t want you to fuck him.” Minho’s voice softens, he fucked up, he knows he did. He ruined our friendship. “Motherfucker.” You breath out shakily, you tried to comprehend what Minho was saying, but the lingering feeling of his lips on yours blurred everything. “I’m sorry, I fucked up. I wouldn’t blame you if you hate me- mmph.” You cut him off this time with your lips, cupping his face in your hands before pulling away. “You’re lips are so fucking soft, better than what I imagined.” You pulled Minho back into a rough, messy kiss. Minho didn’t kiss back, he couldn’t, his mind was too busy going over your words, ‘better than what I imagined’. Had you imagined his lips before? Is that why you were staring at him weirdly at the party earlier?

“Fuck, sorry.” You pant pulling away from him, noticing how he never kissed back. “Don’t be.” Minho grunted before pushing you softly against the wall, his lips reattaching to yours. He trailed his lips down towards your neck, gently sucking at the skin there. You bit your lip to prevent any moans to slip out, Minho nudged your legs apart with his thigh, slipping it between your mini-skirt covered thighs. Your hands make their way into Minho’s brown hair, entangling it with your fingers. Pulling the hair at the nape of his neck when he bites down on your collarbone.

A small whimper fell from your lips, Minho pulled away to look at you. The way your chest heaved with your shaky breaths, the way your face twisted with pleasure, the way your cheeks were flushed red, and your lips so swollen. The sight sent arousal straight to his twitching cock. “Is this okay?” Minho asked quietly as his hands surrounded the curve of your ass. Your eyes fluttered open, “Yeah.” You hummed, rolling your hips into his, desperate for any sort of friction.

Minho suddenly pulled away from the wall, still holding you by the ass, guiding your bodies towards your bed. He gently pushed you down onto the mattress, soaking in your beauty from his view from above. “So pretty, just for me babe?” Minho smirked, though he was teasing you, there was truth behind his compliment. “Min, I swear if you don’t fucking do something, I’m gonna kick you out.” You huffed, your cunt throbbing and yearning to be touched. “Okay, okay.” He chuckled, his hand reaching down towards your inner thigh, he parted them again with his knee. Spreading you open as your mini-skirt bunched up at your hips, revealing the panties you wore, a faint wet patch displayed.

Minho was dazed, he couldn’t stop staring at you, your body, the girl he’s liked for years was laid out underneath him, wanting for him to touch her. “You okay?” You exhale, noticing how your best friend stalled at the sight. “Yeah,” Minho blinked, his eys shifting back to yours, “God I really wanna fuck you.”

“Please do.”

Something was triggered inside Minho, he immediately stripped you both of your clothes, tossing them somewhere in the studio, leaving the two of you in just undergarments. His hands ran alongside your body, sculpting it into his memory. Minho’s finger trailed closer to the place where you needed him the most. He hooked his fingers on your panty, slowly pulling it to the side, exposing your leaking cunt that was begging to be touched. You whimper as he traces his finger along your wet folds, Minho pushes at your entrance, his fingers slipping in and out as he stretches you out. He shoves his hands down his boxers, pumping his hardened cock.

“Min, please. Fuck me.” You whined, he pulled his fingers down so that he could pull off his boxers. Finally freeing his cock, Minho pools his underwear by his ankles, grabbing you by the hips and repositioning your body comfortably at the edge of the bed.

He watched as you bit your lip from the feeling of him rubbing his cock against your bare cunt. Minho let out a soft groan as he finally entered you, he went slow at first allowing you to adjust to his size. “God, you’re so beautiful.” You hum as your cheeks flush at his praise.

You didn’t know where these compliments were coming from, sure Minho’s called you pretty before, but it was different this time- well no shit- it felt more intimate, like he really meant it and wasn't just saying it to make you feel better. Minho started thrusting slowly, you studied how his features scrunched up in ecstasy, a red hue spread throughout his cheeks to the tips of his ears, how his hair stuck to his forehead with sweat as he fastened his pace. It was all so hot, it drove you closer to your climax.

“Oh fuck, Min, I’m so close.” You moaned out, gripping his back. “Almost there too babe.” You groan at the pet name. Minho moved one of his hands to your clit and started rubbing it, “There you go, you’re being such a good girl, letting me fuck your pussy like this.” He grunts in your ear. His words along with the erotic squelching sounds that bounced off the apartment’s wall was enough to finally drive you over the edge. “C’mon baby, cum for me.” Minho continued ramming into you, whining at the overstimulation for a few more seconds until his thrusts became sloppy as he neared his orgasm, “Where do you want it?” “Inside, cum in me Min.” Minho’s vision went white, filling you up as his orgasm overflowed him. His warmth filling you. “So good.” He sighed, pulling out of your cunt. You laid there for a few moments after cleaning up your bodies before drifting off to sleep.

~

The sun peeked through the window, pulling the covers over your face at the light. Clacking of dishes finally pulls you out of your slumber, you turn over and peek through the soft comforter to see Minho in your kitchen making some breakfast. He didn’t have a shirt on, his back with faint scratch marks facing you, the memories of last night flooding your mind. Holy shit, I just slept with my best friend.

You couldn’t face him, what does that make you guys now? More than friends obviously, but partners? Hookup buddies? Friends with benefits? The realization that this could probably fuck up your relationship finally dawned on you.

You throw the comforter off of your body, rolling out of bed you stretch your arms above your head relieving some of the pain in your lower back. Minho must’ve noticed you, he turned around with a soft smile. “Morning, did I wake you?” He frowned, turning off the stove and making his way towards you. The scar on his stomach catches your eye, Minho was usually insecure about not wearing a shirt around others because of it, the scar drew uncomfortable and unwanted questions, he only really had told you what had happened, so you smile whenever he shows it, you feel his trust in you.

“Yeah, but it’s already kinda late anyways.” You chuckle, glancing at the clock. Thank God it’s the weekend. “Um, can we talk though, about…” You start, sucking in a breath hinting at last night, Minho just stared at you for a few seconds trying to think of what to say. “What’s there to talk about?” He decided on. “Wh-What?!” You scoffed, taken aback by his answer, “Minho we literally fucked last night…we’ve been friends for over six years! ‘Friends’ don't do that!” Minho simply shook his head, “It doesn't have to mean anything, and besides, you ever heard of friends with benefits?” You roll your eyes at his snarky response, Minho simply cocks his brow. “So what are we then?”

“Friends.” Minho shrugged, you gave him an exacerbated look, “Friends who fuck?” You smack his arm playfully. He lets out a laugh, “I don’t know, if it happens it happens. C’mon forget about it, let's eat breakfast.”

~

And it did happen, every other day it did. You’d get off with each other, a continuous sick-cycle carousel that never seemed to end. Night after night you’d lay in your bed wondering what the two of you were. Minho would make you breakfast, flirt with you, and ‘jokingly’ take you on dates as if you were dating. Over those weeks you started developing feelings towards him, you know you shouldn’t but if you’re honest with yourself you’ve loved this man for the longest time, given you loved him as your best friend, you’ve seen him at his lowest and he’s seen you at yours. You’ve watched him grow as a person, he’s always been there for you, what is there to not love about him. You loved this man, you loved your best friend, you loved Minho.

Fuck.

You needed to tell him, but you couldn’t tell him. You didn’t want to ruin what you already had with him, these past six years of friendship. You couldn't do that, you wouldn’t. Not until you let it slip one day after one of your hookups.

“What do you mean you want me to stop acting all boyfriendy? What the fuck does that even mean?!” Minho frowned, his arms crossing after placing a glass of water on my bedside table. “I just think it’s weird since we aren't dating…just fucking.” It hurt your heart to say that, though it was the truth, and he knew it was too. “Okay so you just want me to just stop being nice?” Minho’s voice began to raise in volume, his defensiveness coming up. “No, just the flirting, holding hands, the ‘dates’, the touchiness when we're not you know…that’s more for couples.”

“What’s that even supposed to mean?! Why are you even bringing this up all of the sudden? Do you-” A sudden dawning occurred to Minho, “Do you like someone?” Your cheeks flushed, I guess now’s the time. “And what if I do?” You remark, silently praying that you don't actually say the words you’ve been dreading to say for weeks.

“Y/N.” He says in a warning manner. “Why do you even care?!” You burst, anxiety and anger rising in you, “You’re not my boyfriend!” Minho’s heart dropped, he knew he wasn’t your boyfriend though he felt like he could portray it after all you’ve done together. He yearned for you, in more than a friends with benefits kind of way, but he was scared, scared of having his heart broken again.

“Who is it?” Minho mumbled under his breath, “No, I’m not going to tell you- mmph.” Minho cut you off with a kiss, frustration clouding his mind. You push him off of you, shoving him away. “You did not just fucking- what are we doing?!” You cried out of frustration, a small tear cascading down your cheeks. “We never- we weren’t like this…what are we?!”

“Stop asking that fucking question, I’ve already told you we’re friends!”

“And I’ve already told you, friends don’t kiss, they don’t hook up just because, they don’t hold hands or go on dates, and friends don’t fucking catch feelings for the other- shit, this is all so fucking confusing!” Your voice cracked between your cries, you didn’t even care that you confessed, you wanted your best friend…that’s all you’ve ever wanted.

“What do you mean ‘catch feelings for the other’?” Minho’s gaze darkened as he neared you again. Your hands raise up to push him away. “Y/N, do you lik-“

“Yes I fucking like you, how could I not! And it fucking hurts you know that, the way you treat me so well, I’m torturing myself by staying in whatever this has become.” You gesture between the two of you.

“I do know how bad it hurts!” Minho exclaims, “You don’t know how long I’ve liked you…and I’d never act on it cuz I care for you too much, I didn’t want to lose you.” Your face softened at his confession, tears continued falling from your eyes. “Why are you-“

“Because I’m scared, okay!” Minho yelled, tears falling from his eyes, “I’m scared.” His voice softened. You’ve only ever seen Minho cry one time, it was when he got his heart broken by this girl he dated for four years. He had loved her, truly loved her and she stomped on his heart. “I don’t want it- I don’t want to end up like last time.”

“But what if we don’t end up like that?” You sniffle, “What if we live through life and move in together. What if we’re happy?”

“We were happy for four years-” Minho takes a sharp breath, “love hurts and I don’t- I can’t…” He frantically shakes his head, his breathing unstable as he sobs, hands covering his face.

“I love you,” You state, “not just as a friend. I don’t know why it took me so long to see it, I don’t wanna lose you, and I don’t want you to push me away, the thought of that scares me…but I won’t stop loving you Min, never. You’re my best friend.” Minho looked at you from behind his hands, you hesitantly walked closer to him, taking his hands in yours, pulling them away from his face and intertwining them. You look down at your hands and smile through your tears. His eyes shifted to your hands as well.

You suddenly pull him into a tight hug, Minho melts into your hold, his arms reciprocating your hold. “I just want us to figure out what it’s that we’ve got going on.” You smile weakly, Minho leans to kiss the top of your head.

“I love you.” He finally says, dried tear stains on his flushed cheeks, “God I love you so fucking much.” Minho smiles before cupping your face and kissing your lips. You smile into the kiss. You both pull away before Minho engulfs you into another hug, “I love you.”

“I love you too Min.”

[pluviophile-imagines]

🎉 NEW GAME: Introduce your mutuals to everyone and what do you think of them? 🎉

oooo interesting....... ok. as we all know i cannot shut the fuck up this is under the cut bc despite me having less than 10 mutuals total i also apparently decided to soapbox at the end so im uhhhhh very sorry. not sorry enough to edit anything tho LMFAO

first off i wanna say that i actually dont have that many mutuals LMFAO i only just recently (in the last uhhh three or four months, over the course of this blog which has been around for going on 2 yrs) started rlly putting effort into reaching out and making mutuals. im also only including "true" mutuals here, people who I mostly interact with on tumblr and not through discord, bc shout-out to @venexus @tay-is-writing @scotchtapehanta and @myherowritings yall r some of my bestest friends but we're not close bc we're tumblr mutuals! we're tumblr mutuals bc we became close through discord beforehand, and thats a big difference imo. also i wanna note that this is in chronological order! and i wanna say most of these blogs r 18+ because that's the content i tend to consume, so please please please respect their policies wrt interaction.

imma start this off with @cellotonins bc cookie is the first true mutual i made on this blog and what a first pick! theyre an absolute sweetheart, i adore seeing them on my dash, and im so excited to see where they'll be taking their new blog. rest assured i will be lurking in their inbox the whole time🧍

@andypantsx3 andie andie andie my beloved....... funnily enough i found her through one of HER mutuals when i was on a Jason Todd kick. and then i absolutely devoured her masterlist, and the rest is history. andie is the only person i will read oblivious reader from tbh, i adore her writing so much i cant even be annoyed JHABFJHAFBV and ma'am you have perfected the art of just the right level of slow burn & length of fic i applaud you

@ofmermaidstories merm! what is there to say about merm other than if u havent read her bakugo fic surrender (when youre ready) then what r u doing reading this silly lil love bomb and not that??? merm is going places lemme tell u. shes gonna publish a book and be a huge successful author and i will get to tell my cats as an old lady that i knew her when she was writing anime fanfiction.........

@wuhllow willow my darling my bakugo sister wife. i made that up just now idk if itll stick. absolute queen of bakugo characterization its like she n i share the same braincell wrt him. every time she makes a bkg post i commandeer it and add my 2 cents i just gotta its a compulsion..... everything she writes makes me wanna write more

@ihatebnha caitie's so fucking cool and if i get my way i will bully myself into her good graces. if u want good convo along with good writing, shes the blog for u. caitie if u see this brace urself im going to be friendship-courting you soon and that IS a threat be ready for me to hop in ur dms at any time

@saintdabi vic holy fuck i dont know how i managed to get them to follow me...... im still a lil intimidated by them tbfh i always feel a lil like im annoying them IUSHBDF but the takes??? the hot takes??? about like EVERYTHING from characterization/meta to just. talking about real-life bullshit on their blog...... im always sitting looking at the convos on their blog like "no lori u cant send in five asks thats too much" lmfao (esp bc im usually reading them the morning after theyve finished......)

@suguwu ALSO someone whose support is a mystery to me HBSDFUVH bee.... u know im a bnha blog right...... ik im working on that gojo fic but why r u here (im not complaining) bee is an absolute legend and shes going to fucking slaughter me with gothic romance geto when that comes out,,,,,,,, like deadass itll kill me. also someone who's a lil intimidating but in a "my older sister's cool friend" kinda way O.O

@izuukii scouts a lil bit of an outlier so disclaimer we did technically meet on discord through their 404 server! n e way ive only followed them for a week or so but im loving how eclectic their content is LMFAO scout definitely has a lil for everyone which is so fun. also i cant wait for nov to end so we can sprint together again bc i swear my writing production has more than halved with sprint bot out of commission......

and finallly adding @sipsteainanxiety on the end here breaking the chronological order bc i have known shay for almost two years!!! omg we actually JUST met up irl 🥺 it was so fun; she should technically be wayyy up at the top with folks i met through discord but we interact on tumblr so much i figured it was silly not to talk abt her. my OTHER bakugo twin flame, we ALSO share bakugo braincells and she's conditioned me into writing a couple hundred words on a certain fic every time i see ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️ for which i am begrudgingly thankful

i wanna note now that i included literally ALL of my mutuals bc again i dont rlly have that many! that includes some who i've only just started interacting with & i might not know well, so if ur on this list and going "wait we havent talked that much why did she tag me....." thats why LMFAO im terribly sorry if it puts u off.

and here comes the soapbox. im gonna be honest, i think the culture of mutuals on this site is..... well, not necessarily toxic or unhealthy, because making friends bc of a shared interest is so fucking cool! especially if you're both working hard on it—writing is so much more fun when you have someone to support you and cheer you on, and bounce ideas off of. thats one of the reasons i decided to be more active and reach out more on here! i need enablers yall. badly. pls enable me

but i do wanna put out here..... theres a strange result from mutual culture where it feels like EVERYONE involved looks at everyone else and thinks to themselves "theyre all closer to each other than i am, they're doing it differently and im not doing it right" and that feeling sucks. it rlly does. so i guess one of the reasons im tagging people im not super close to is to reassure people looking at this that like....... im still figuring this shit out too. interpersonal relationships are fucking HARD, ya girl is autistic she KNOWS, so like. take it one step at a time and try not to compare the way you're feeling to the way other blogs project themselves—you dont really know what goes on behind the scenes, how much anyone truly talks to anyone else in DMs or otherwise. these are blogs! you're not seeing every aspect of anybody!

and i finish it off with hey! if u are someone i tagged that i dont know super well and r thinking "wow i wanna talk to her more" (or someone i tagged who i do interact with a bunch and just wanna get to know me better!) pls do! im friendly lol. and if i havent yet i will be jumping into ur dms at some point. thats a threat. its inevitable 👁️👄👁️ i just need to be in the right mood

[rikiflrts]

— ꒰‧ 𝐃𝐚𝐢𝐬𝐲'𝐬 𝐏𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐭 𝐋𝐢𝐬𝐭 ༉‧₊˚✧

after what seemed like forever, i finally made my own prompt list! if you wish to request for the prompts that you’d like to use with a certain member, then feel free to choose any of the numbers displayed and tell me about them in the ask box (^^).

also: please be specific with the genre that you'd like to imply with your chosen prompts, thank you~ ♡

1.) "i just wanted to give you a hug"

2.) "dumbass we're lost now thanks to you!" " i already got lost in your eyes from the moment i met you but you don't see me complaining."

3.) "please don't talk to me right now, im not in the mood"

4.) "how are you so beautiful?"

5.) "my hoodie looks great on you"

6.) "how could you..."

7.) "i trusted you"

8.) "i didn't tell you to trust me."

9.) "you're leaving? just like that?"

10.) "no stop you're making me blush"

11.) "and if i am?"

12.) "just shut up and let me play with your hair"

13.) "so this is what falling in love feels like"

14.) "how are you even real..?"

15.) "are you being for real right now?"

16.) "...did you just sniff me?"

17.) "if you're that mad then why don't you just take it out on me?"

18.) "i don't mind"

19.) "you dumbass, i said i like you!"

20.) "i used to have this huge crush on you (laughs)" "used to?" "well, yeah.. i dont really like you anymore"

21.) "can i hold your hand?"

22.) "are you nervous?"

23.) "less talking, more working!"

24.) "im in love with an idiot"

25.) "but you promised me that we'd get married!!" "for the love of god, ____ we were 5 when that promise was made!"

26.) "but i still love/like you.."

27.) "this reminded me of you"

28.) "his/her/their smile is really pretty.."

29.) "just confess already!!"

30.) "you're an idiot." "yeah. your idiot."

31.) "are you even paying attention?"

32.) "does it look like i care?"

33.) "i don't really care"

34.) "it's been a while since i last smiled like this"

35.) "oh crap im starting to feel the butterflies again"

36.) "I'm scared, okay?! i can't do it"

37.) "what are you so scared of?"

38.) "im scared of falling.." "dont be, i'll catch you."

39.) "promise..?" "promise."

40.) "i guess promises really were meant to be broken."

41.) "you made a fool out of me!"

42.) "im sorry, its not you.. its me."

43.) "what about our promises??" "what about them?"

44.) "please dont go"

45.) "is/are they/he/she all you're ever going to look at?im already right in front of your attention is still focused on them/him/her."

46.) "that's it..?"

47.) "cuddle with me"

48.) "no."

49.) "his/her/their eyes were like pools; so deep. I fear that if I fall, I might never come out and reach for air."

50.) "i love spending time with you"

51.) "let's just be friends"

52.) "im sorry, im afraid of commitment"

53.) "im afraid of it too. why don't you just take this risk and overcome your fears with me?"

54.) "if its you, then i dont mind."

55.) "i love your smell"

56.) "what's that supposed to mean?"

57.) "first love really never does die huh"

58.) "hey, you look really familiar" "oh, really?" "yeah. you look like my soulmate."

59.) "if you like me so much then just marry me already"

60.) "wait i can do that?!" "your gullibility really amazes me sometimes."

61.) "are you dumb? be honest"

62.) "im not in the mood"

63.) "are you okay?"

64.) "you look horrible" "oh wow gee thanks for pointing that out sherlock"

65.) "what's in it for me?"

66.) "do you..like me?"

67.) "do you like him/her/them?"

68.) "but i wrote you letters.."

69.) "they mean nothing to me."

70.) "wow! i haven't seen you in ages, how have you been?" "we literally just saw each other 5 hours ago."

71.) "wipe that smirk off your face, its annoying"

72.) "aww, why? are you perhaps threatened that you'll end up falling for me?"

73.) "i think im going to puke"

74.) "are you blushing?"

75.) "aren't you tired of comstantly running in my mind?"

76.) "i can't get him/her/them out of my head"

77.) "your laugh sounds really pretty"

78.) "i love how your eyes sparkle whenever you're invested in something"

79.) "im falling"

80.) "oh no im catching feelings"

81.) "do you ever stop talking?"

82.) "let me get that for you"

83.) "its okay, i can pay for myself" "no. i wont let you" "but i have my own mone-" "shut up and let me spoil you!"

84.) "i refuse to stay in the same room with the likes of him/her/them!"

86.) "it was pretty obvious.."

87.) "come here."

88.) "stop doing that to yourself!"

89.) "you deserve better."

90.) "just leave. i dont want to see your face anymore."

91.) "i hate you." "the feeling's mutual."

92.) "didn't i tell you to leave me alone?!"

93.) "was it so wrong to love you..?"

94.) "if you really love me then just stay away from my sight."

95.) "you feel like home"

96.) "i love hugging you, it makes me feel safe"

97.) "i could kiss you right now!" "you're very welcome to do it."

98.) "i can't keep playing pretend"

99.) "let's put an end to this.."

100.) "i think im actually catching feelings"

101.) "this is getting dangerous.."

102.) "give me another chance"

103.) "give me one reason why i shouldnt leave."

104.) "im going to do it! im finally going to confess to him/her/them!"

105.) "you've got to be kidding me.."

106.) "i knew what i signed up for. im not surprised."

107.) "he/she/they has/have stars in his/her/their eyes and im captivated"

108.) "i love you" "nice try, but im not falling for that"

109.) "is it that hard to fall in love with me?!"

110.) "well if you put it that way, then yes."

111.) "you look happy"

112.) "you look happier without me."

113.) "can you guys please change the dare"

114.) "who gave you the right to toy around with my emotions like that?!"

115.) "i got played.."

116.) "stay out of my sight."

117.) "you're an eyesore" "you're an eye candy"

118.) "why are you still here?"

119.) "why..?"

120.) "stop making fun of me!" "make me."

121.) "was i just some kind of sick joke to you?"

122.) " i really like you "

123.) "i don't know how to express my feelings that well but i just want you to know that i'd take a bullet for you"

124.) "i'd do anything just to see you smile like that again"

125.) "what are you staring at?"

126.) "i think i have a crush on you" "you think? you're not even sure?"

127.) "take my hand"

128.) "let's get out of here."

129.) "you should wear my clothes more often"

130.) "i can teach you how"

131.) "I'm here for you"

132.) "you can use me to forget about him/her/them"

133.) "even if the world turns againt us, as long as we have each other, then we'll be alright."

134.) "you're all that i need"

135.) "you're all that i ever wanted"

136.) "you're all that i have"

137.) "please don't leave me"

138.) "I'm sorry."

139.) "look at me."

140.) "look at me and tell me that you don't love me anymore."

141.) "you're an idiot."

142.) "i don't love you anymore."

143.) "did you just drink from my cup?" "and if i did?"

144.) "im going to kill you!" "you don't scare me"

145.) "stay with me a little longer"

146.) "i knew it.."

147.) "i should've known.."

148.) "are you jealous?"

149.) "i made you a playlist"

150.) "when will you ever look my way..?"

151.) "im fine with looking at him/her/them from afar"

152.) "he's/she's/they're out of my league"

151.) "im scared of getting rejected"

152.) "back to square one"

153.) "I'm tired"

154.) "what do you like about me?"

154.) "i'd rather starve than spend time with him/her/them."

155.) "if i'm an idiot, then you're a coward"

156.) "i dreamt about you last night"

157.) "it was a nightmare"

158.) "it's the little things that he/she/they do/does that drive me insane"

159.) "i like you more than i should"

160.) "be mine"

161.) "it was too good to be true.."

162.) "i had a crush on him/her/them"

163.) "i never really thought that i'd end up falling for you"

164.) "you're adorable"

165.) "you mean the world to me"

166.) "you meant the world to me"

167.) "what happened in the past stays in the past"

168.) "careful, you might end up falling for me"

169.) "very funny, mister lover boy"

170.) "lets go out on a date"

171.) "i'm so lucky to have you"

172.) "where are you going?"

173.) "sometimes it really just gotta be like that"

174.) "hello good afternoon, what's your order?" "hell- oh wow.. you please" "im sorry, could you say that again?" "wait no! i meant- uh..oh dear.."

175.) "he's too good for me"

176.) "stop giving me mixed signals"

177.) "i guess it really just wasn't meant to be"

178.) "im not interested in you"

179.) "i cant get him/her/them out of my head"

180.) "where is/are he/she/they?"

181.) "you took my pillow so im going to use you as a pillow"

182.) "why are you avoiding me?"

183.) "did i do something wrong?"

184.) "please talk to me"

185.) "im not even his/her/their ideal type"

186.) "it wouldn't hurt to try"

187.) "you smell like me"

188.) "i like my scent on you"

189.) "that sounds weird if you put it that way"

190.) "can i call you tonight?"

191.) "you should smile more often"

192.) "i hate it when people tell me what to do"

193.) "lets wear matching outfits!"

194.) "im arresting you." "why? i didnt do anything wrong" "yes you did, you stole my heart and i want justice!"

195.) "i guess i got too caught up with my fatasies to notice that he/she/they never really liked me back in the first place.."

196.) "you're the answer to all my prayers"

198.) "you should go home."

199.) "let me come with you"

200.) "run away with me"

last updated: 12/30/20

take me back to navigation ↺

[insidetheacademy]

Say You Love Me

pairings: Peter Parker x Reader (peter and reader are both 18+)

summary: in which reader wants Peter but Peter is happy in his relationship

warnings: angst angst angst and bad writings

gif credits: tomholland (i cant tag them:-(!)

part ii  part iii part iv part v

-

the birds were chirping outside of my apartment signaling to the flocks of other birds to go home as the sun was going to set. you were sitting on the couch with your phone in hand scrolling through instagram when a message notification dinged and it read a familiar name “peepee”. you read the message and it said “what are you up to?”, you hover your thumb to the notification and send a quick reply “hello to you too– i’m currently on my couch just hanging. how about you, spiderboy?”.

surprisingly after a few seconds he replied, it wasnt quite like him to reply fast enough due to him patrolling often when the sun goes down but you guessed maybe he’s taking a break from it.

“do you maybe want to eat sushi? i’m super hungry,” he said, you then shoot back “sure why not. i’ll meet you at our usual spot,”. your phone dinged yet again but you didnt need to look at it as it would probably be him saying okay.

you went to your wardrobe and picked out a black top with a pair of jeans nothing too flashy. you wouldnt want to dress up just for some silly “eating with your friend” kind of date plus you knew that Peter would dress down anyway so why not do the same? after you grabbed your bag and your phone you headed out to meet Peter.

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

as you walked into the sushi restaurant, you stopped to search for Peter, your eyes then stopped when you saw a brunette boy with the biggest grin who’s sitting at a table next to the sushi counter waving at you. you head over to him and exchanged hi’s.

“how’s it going, spider boy?” you asked cheekishly, he rolled his eyes and replied “the same old same old. Aunt May’s out of town for the next few days,” you nodded in response. “i must say, tonight you’re looking quite marvelous,” he said sarcastically not knowing the butterflies in your stomach that he just set free. you sticked out your tongue at him and say “you’re not being slick, Parker,” he laughed it off and continue to look at the menu. the waiter then came to take your order.

once the both of your orders came, the both you digged in straight away. the whole time they were eating it was filled with laughters, chewed food shown on your tongue to him and light conversations. after you were done eating, you split the bills.

whilst walking back home, he asked you “hey, y/n, how do i ask a girl out?” you laughed at him and said “i dont know, Pete?? i guess try giving her flowers and then hit her with the big ol’ question.” he nodded mentally taking note eventhough it was so simple an ant could remember it. you hoped and pray that this girl is you.

you were curious to know who was this girl, you tried asking him but he said its a surprise. you would’ve thought that you stopped here but oh no, you tried pushing Peter into spilling it but he refused to do so.

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

it was 8am on a Saturday and your phone was vibrating so loud. what an annoying sound you thought to yourself, trying to get back to sleep as it would most probably some unknown caller. it stopped. well, for awhile then it got to ringing again, frustratedly you got out of bed to look at your phone and it was Peter calling.

“you better have some good explanation on why you’re calling me at 8am on a Saturday, Parker.” you said sternly to him to which then he respond with “uh, yeah, so i’m trying to buy flowers for the girl i’m asking to prom and i don’t know what kind of flowers are girls into,” you mentally palm yourself to his idiocy and replied “get a rose. its cliché but its kinda romantic in a way, i guess,” how the hell were you supposed to know what other girls like? all you know was that you liked sunflowers and allisium. so you asked him to get the most basic flower, a rose. he thanked you and immediately end the call. great! now you can go back to sleep.

time skipped to 8pm, you were lying on you bed just listening to a song by Heart Attack Man. you were just vibing to the song when the doorbell rang. you paused the song and went straight to the door. you opened the door to meet a brown eyes and a curly haired boy, he was smiling like crazy. you looked at him weird, “what’s up, Parker?” he then proceed to hug you and he literally squealed “I asked Jane to go to out and she said yes!” your heart shattered to million pieces.

not gonna lie, you thought he was gonna ask you. i guess he was still pretty clueless about your feelings towards him. he went on and on and on about Jane’s reaction when he asked her. you couldnt do anything except smiled and nodded at him. though it was breaking your heart you couldnt do anything.

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

it has been a year since Jane and Peter are a thing. ever since he has gotten together with Jane, Peter had bailed you so many times. it happened frequently to the point where you had stopped texting him altogether.

you tried moving on, tried going on dates with loads of people. even people who are not your type. well eventually you found one guy, his name was Sam. he was actually kinda perfect but you broke things off with him but the feeling was mutual. you both decided that the both of you are too busy.

you were walking at a park when you saw Peter with a girl beside him. he caught your eye and gave you the hugest smile ever. you noticed his familiar warm smile but you chose to ignore it and look at the opposite direction. “y/n, wait up!” you immediately stopped in your tracks as he stop running to you taking a deep breath, you look at him pitifully.

he asked you the usual catching up stuffs. you were trying hard to not cry when Jane came to him and greet him “hey babe! who’s this?” Peter then introduced you to Jane “Jane this is y/n. my best friend.” you exchanged smiles with Jane, she then said to Peter “i gotta go home now, babe. i got work tomorrow.” they pecked each other on the lips before she goes and you wanted to puke.

you were awfully silent when you’re with him, he couldnt help but noticed it “is everything alright, y/n? you’re not your usual self.” you wanted to cry at his words. you try to control yourself and try to tell him the truth, “can I be honest with you Pete?” he nodded frantically and you continued “i... i kinda like you. i have always liked you since high school. i want you for all of my life. i had someone during the time we stopped talking, but everytime he kisses me, i wish it was you. everytime he hugs me, all i could think about was your-“ Peter cuts you off with a stern voice “thats enough,”

you were taken aback by his voice and the fact that he cuts you off mid sentence. you looked at him trying to hold back the tears, “y/n, look, i like you too but as a friend. i’m happy now with Jane and i wouldnt change it for the world. i am sorry that you like me but you have to find another.” you winced at the words that he said and you couldnt help but walk away.

you were sobbing absentmindedly on your bed, holding to your dear heart. this is what you expected him to say. this is what you had expected to happened. it was all like a nightmare. you pinched yourself so many times wishing that it was to wake up in his arms while they were cuddling watching a boring movie but it isnt and you had to accept it.

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

a/n; feedbacks are welcomed!! and so are questions!’ everythinge is welcome, i am so bored with locking myself for another 2 weeks!!!

[bruh-haikyuu]

Yes I have been waiting for this day 😭😭 can I request some angst(is that how you spell it lol) for oikawa and kuroo where their S/O recieve a message from their ex saying that if they dont break up with the them they will cause them harm the s/o breaks up with them but doesn't tell anyone you decide if its going to be a happy ending or not also I dont know what would fit this request I was think scenario but it's up to you I hope you have a good day and keep up the amazing writing 💖💖💖💖

A/N: o shit damn this is going to hurt to write bUT IM EXCITED ANYWAY BECAUSE PAIN IS GREAT

Also I’ll write this in two parts; one for Oikawa and one for Kuroo because I feel like they deserved two individual posts. Have a great week anon! Thank you for requesting

Kuroo’s Version: here

“I can’t stop thinking about you, Y/N. It hurts me to see you with another man.”

You could only stare at your phone in silence as terror drains the color from your cheeks. He was back. He shouldn’t be back. He couldn’t be back.

“Don’t you miss me too, Y/N?”

Your fingers hovered over the keyboard, your wrists threatening to collapse at the flash-flood from your past. “Please leave me alone.”

“Oh.”

You heard the sound of shattering glass in your head, like you had just cut off the wrong wire and set off a bomb. Then the stream of texts continued.

“I’ll do anything for you, Y/N. I’ll admire you from far away. Anything. But will that bastard do the same?

He can’t love you like I do. He could never.

Oikawa Tooru. Age 18. One older sister. Date of birth July 20, 2000. Lives in Kurihara-shi near the postal office with his parents. Attends Aoba Johsai High School, Class 3-6.

Him. Don’t you want to keep him safe, Y/N?”

internecine. | oikawa tooru

warnings: blackmail, angst

word count: 1154

(n.) mutually destructive

“Y/N-chan~ what’s with all the rush? Are we playing a game of tag you never told me about?”

Your obnoxious boyfriend (plus a gaggle of giggling girls sneaking up on him behind a pillar) trailed at your frenzied footsteps on the midday after that. You still haven’t told him yet. No, you weren’t even planning to tell him anything about it. You were already scared enough about it, and you didn’t want to burden Oikawa after his defeat by Shiratorizawa.

“Am I ‘it’?”

“Tooru.” You finally turned around, meeting him with dead-cold eyes. Those eyes and the way his name rolled off your tongue was enough to keep his advances at bay. “C-can we talk?”

“Sure.”

Eyes peering over the slope of his shoulders, your glare drilled a hole through the girls still watching from the nearby pillar. Without much consideration, you took the initiative to grab his unsuspecting hand and made a run for it.

Locking the classroom door behind you, your body slumped against the wooden frame, exhausted from all the extra cardio. You’re very much aware how short it would take for Oikawa’s fangirls to locate you; they were amazing in an unconventional way. There wasn’t going to be much time to spare to what you were going to tell him.

But how were you going to tell him?

“Hey, Tooru. My obsessive, pain-in-the-ass ex-boyfriend somehow found my phone number and he’s threatening to dump you into the ocean if I ignore him.”

You sighed. And you called yourself ‘creative’…

“Geez, Y/N… I knew you were one for games, but at least you gotta tell me what we’re playing.”

You almost forgot your boyfriend stood before you, arms crossed, a serious look dabbling across his features. “Is there something wrong, Y/N-chan?”

A lump of doubt rose in your throat, the truth threatening to spill out of your mouth. You couldn’t tell him. Not now at least. Maybe not ever. If you told him, you knew he’d try to spur up some bold solution that’d end up in some hot mess. Sure, the previous messes were fine to begin with, but this was your ex-boyfriend in question. Your obsessive, pain-in-the-ass ex-boyfriend. Were you really going to risk Tooru for the truth? What would become of him in the end?

“I-I…” you struggled, gaze fixed onto the wooden slats of the floor.

“…”

“I want to br-break up. I-I don’t think we’re going to work out…”

“……”

Say something, you idiot. You were quick to notice the brightness in Oikawa’s eyes disappear, like stars fading away at the wake of daylight. It was for the best, you repeated to yourself. For Tooru. There was no need for you to grovel in your despair.

“I can fix it, Y/N. Tell me how to fix it so…” he finally spoke, desperation clinging onto his pleas, “…s-so I can keep liking you…”

Your lips fell into a flat line, trembling at the sorry soul that was Aoba Johsai’s prized Oikawa Tooru. You wanted to cry, kneel with him on the ground, embrace him like nothing would ever come between the two of you. You wanted to tell him, I’m doing this to protect you! or I don’t want you to get hurt. But you left. It was the only thing you could do anyway.

“Y/N! Wait, please! I-I…”

His cries dissolved into white noise as your feet carried you out of the classroom, bringing Oikawa Tooru’s sure survival along with you.

Were you really going to end it like this? Letting the bad guy get what he wanted? You knew this wasn’t a shoujo manga, it was a seriously dangerous situation and submerging Oikawa deeper into your past wasn’t going to cauterize any wound.

Now, walking down the school halls led you into a cesspool of bitterness—where Oikawa wept, the entire student body wept with him. They made a point to even make sure you overheard their whispers under any circumstances. This was your punishment and you were willing to accept it.

For Tooru, you breathed, catching a glimpse of a trio of students sporting the Volleyball Club jacket talking quietly amongst themselves near the student restrooms. You recognized one of them as Iwaizumi, Oikawa’s childhood friend who probably would be able to take care of him without you.

“I don’t think we’ll structurally survive with the Captain’s emotional state,” one first year muttered. “H-he’s been pushing himself to the limit lately, I’m worried about him.”

“Geez, I haven’t seen him sulk like this since Shiratorizawa last term…” a pink-haired third year sighed, scratching the back of his neck gruffly. “Kindaichi’s right. Prelimins is in a few weeks, if he keeps all this stress training up then…”

“Then we support him,” Iwaizumi finally spoke.

Both the players and you perked up at his statement. Edging closer to the wall, you made sure the three didn’t catch you slipping your ears into their conversation.

“Oikawa’s a mess right now and our focus shouldn’t be on the cause nor the effect. We’re Aoba Johsai’s trustworthy volleyball team; our focus now should be Preliminaries,” he continued.

“I know Oikawa knows his boundaries as well as his priorities. I trust that he does. That’s why we can’t falter in front of him.”

Trust. It was something you always gave to others. You trusted your parents with your existence. You trusted your teachers with your goals. You trusted Oikawa with your entire living breath.

But you never let anyone give that trust to you.

Was it why you left? It was a merciless act of mercy after all. Not all sweet things can be painless.

Detaching yourself from the comforts of the concrete wall, you and Iwaizumi locked gazes before you walked off into your uncertain future.

One last message. You told yourself. And through your eyes, you told Iwaizumi Hajime:

“Take good care of Tooru for me.”

[forethan21]

18/12/2020

To me love isnt about staying in a relationship or dwelling on a feeling. Love to me is bending but not breaking to compromise. It is the kind where you know when to let go in hopes to trust for the best to come, the kind where you empathise, showing vulnerability and completely surrender. (Remember when Jesus died for us in the cross? Diba he gave his all, his everything just so we can live. That should be a standard in our lives. To choose someone who would do anything to just be with us without questioning our worth. Never settle for someone who gives half of their heart. Its all or nothing.) The kind that is mature. Love is what you do despite of what you feel. The kind that fights for the good of someone else even if they never see the value or sacrifice that you did. (Thats what Jesus did. He never complained when he was on the cross. All the pain and burden he endured bc he loves us. And look at us now not even recognising how amazing he is. We took it this life for granted- some of us are wasting it, choosing people for our own accord and pleasure. Im saying this in general im not hinting it on anyone, but if the shoes fits then..) The kind that demands temporary surrender of security, giving up familiar bad habits and patterns, giving unrewarded works and efforts. The kind that challenges you in so many ways. Love wasnt made to be comfortable. It was made to show change and growth.

Not gonna lie tho i loved you for you and everything youve done. Those memories are dear to me bc i knew you tried no matter how difficult it was to love me in some days. Kaya gusto ko lng magpasalamat dun. Likewise, something i learned recently was that we should never question someone elses love for us regardless if it was inadequate. Bc i realised we should be thankful for the amount of love and care we receive from any person out there. Family, friends, lovers. That itself should be enough. Its not up to us how much love they should give to make us feel satisfied. That wouldn’t be love. The greatest love you could ever receive should come from you and the Lord not from anybody else. So i just wanna tell you that i take back those times i questioned your love. Bc what you gave was already enough.

Im sorry i couldnt wait for you to change. Bc i realised if you knew how to love me the very first time I wouldnt need to tell you anything. I wouldnt feel hurt bc im rest assured that you love me enough to know what to do. It didnt feel mutual to me.

When u came bck with your letter idk it seemed like there was something missing. Committment and plans. Maybe i was hoping that youd take me back but i guess it was the opposite. And maybe that was your answer after all. To tell me that you arent staying. I hope next time you go into a relationship po, you dont assume the worst. You dont jump into conclusions when it gets tough. Bc like anything can change if youre willing to do it. You need to trust the the other side will stay. It was the way your mindset was so fixed on the idea that I will leave. That i was making excuses. Ndi pow. I jst have standards. Oo tao ka lng, you make mistakes but how do i know tht youre not gonna make the same mistake again? Im jst protecting my heart po. I guess i dont wanna experience the same trauma again.

I hope someday na you will learn to see the good in people regardless if they did u wrong pow. (idk lng ha pero I dont think youve moved on sa ex mo pow. I feel like you havent fully forgiven her and accepted what has happened. I know it hurts to know that they betrayed you like that but your worth is not defined by them po. You did your best po and if she did not recognised that then thats her loss. This is partly what keeps u holding bck. Bc u didnt get closure. I hope you reflect on that and find the closure that you need po. Dont tell me you dont need one bc i know deep in your heart that it still hurts. Like bruh the fact na sure na sure ka na sa kanya u were ready to put a ring on her finger. You were hopeful and certain. I think it was meant to happen to test you both in your worst. You had your mistakes. She had hers. Dont you think you should close tht chapter of your life before starting a new one? Or more importantly, dont you think you deserve peace? Ill leave you to think bout tht). I wasnt trying to find something wrong jst to let you go. If i did i wouldnt put myself in a situation where I will lose my friends po.

Ethan i understand you. I understand your fear of giving too much to someone who youre unsure of and thats fine. But you need to accept the consequences of your mistakes. You need to take responsibility of it and what you couldve done to fix it. (Reflection is very important.) Youre not wrong for not knowing that but again you need to reflect in every situation in your life. It doesnt matter if you were right or wrong. Its important to do this bc the next time it will happen to you, you will know what to do. reflecting really helps you to step back and understand yourself, other people and the surroundings. It helps with analysing your own feelings, emotions and as well as understanding the depth of your own thinking. You need to consider other people’s feelings too. Understand their point of view and why they did things that way. 

I told you yesterday that what happened in the past does not define you. You may have done them so wrong but i hope your realise youre not in debt to them. I remember your story about what you did to the girl. Yung trauma mo sa kanya you gotta let it go pow. You dont need to blame yourself every day for something that youve no control of. You did it out of anger. and she threatened you bc she has her personal issues as well. She was showing wat kind of person she was. It does not put a label on u. So far as I know you havent apologised to urself for what had happened and u havent forgiven her for what shes done. Whenever youre mad po dont let your emotions get the best of you. Give space and time. Step back from the situation and reflect. count to ten and reorganise your thoughts and feelings. What happened? what made me feel that way? what can i do to fix this? 

The way i see it lng ha pero it felt like youre pitying yourself. And i want o reassure you that i recognised all you did to keep this relationship. The fights where you communicated with me, the times where you waited for me to explain, the support you give, and how you made me happy each single day. What youve done until this day is enough. I cant emphasise it enough. Ndi ko yun binalewala lahat. I saw your effort. Thats why i fought for u. Bc alam ko ndi ka ganun na tao. Kc alam ko na they have perceived you wrong. I saw the good in you. I saw that youre worthy of change. Everyone does pow. That was the purpose of it all.

But ldr is frickin hard. Being in a relationship is difficult enough let along ldr. Jst thinking about the amount of trust u hav for ur partner dang.. you need to fully invest on trust yo. How to overcome and resolve issues esp if theyre like me haha. Its hard for sure to do tht kc even ako may trust issues but it is possible. But as of now theres many areas in your life that you need to fix alone. Im not saying that im right ha. I could be wrong in so many areas about you that idk of but this is based on knowing you for months. im not saying you have a problem internally cuz we all have problems po What im saying is that there are some things we need to learn from others as well. Its a matter of listening and comprehending what theyre tryna relay and teach u.

Also asking for help isnt a weakness. (Idk but i cud feel you were mad that I reached out to your mother. Bro i know na kaya mo nman maging independent and i know na ayaw mo lng maburden yung parents mo with your problems on top of theirs but its gud that alam din nla ang anak nla is struggling and needs emotional support.) Its realising that we are deserving to feel and be emotionally supported. so dont ever feel bad for reaching out and admitting that youre struggling. after all were only human.

Though i never said anything i lowkey promised that I would not give up on you (sinsabi ko sa sarili ko to) bc i wanted to show you what its like for someone to stay. You told me about your past and struggles and i did everything i can for that not to happen again. You told me what broke your heart and I nver wanted you to feel anything like that in the relationship. More like i ensured that my intentions for you are pure. But somewhere along the way i came to realise that we both need to grow seperately. Not bc i gave up on you but bc i decided to think about myself and what i needed. I dont wanna text you and talk to u bc i respect you that much to know that this isnt the right time for both of us.

Being the way i am right now is for the best. Were both healing and getting the peace we need. God knows what Hes doing with us and i keep you in my prayers at night. Maybe someday down the line well meet again, at the right time. God will decide tht for us but for now ill be supportive of you in the silence. I dont wanna be civil cuz i know itll jst hurt you more esp since you have strong feelings for me. Dont worry my love for you will remain unconditional. But one thing i cant promise tho is that idk if my love for u will stay. We dont know what the future will bring. We may find our happiness in diff places. We may find it together. But all i know is i trust God to dictate my life. Thank you Ethan. Kahit paano i felt your unconditional love din. You can text me anytime if you need anything. Ill be here nman pow.

[tartagyu]

92 questions ✨

rules: you must answer these 92 statements and tag as many people as you like!

tagged by: @bamethyst ; thank you for the tag nora! 💖 tagging: @astonishowell, @ggukgf, @chaiteasuga, @ttae, @agustboy, @cypherr, @sprxngday, @gayminyoongi ,,i know we don’t talk much but i regard y’all as my mutuals ☺️💗

THE LAST: 1. drink: water 2. phone call: with a group mate from one of my classes 3. text message: asking my friend a question about school work zz 4. song you listened to: critical beauty // pentagon 5. time you cried: i nearly cried when i reread a letter to myself written from my 27yo self’s perspective from a week ago but i dont rmb when i actually cried. i think a month ago? like i cried myself to sleep?idk 6. dated someone twice: no 7. kissed someone and regretted it: never kissed anyone i liked y ikez 8. been cheated on: never properly dated people so nope; but if u mean in terms of friendship, yup 9. lost someone special: yea 10. been depressed: ye i think so  11. gotten drunk and thrown up: nope, underaged y’all

LIST 3 FAVOURITE COLOURS: 12-14. pastel blue, any shade of purple, grey

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU: 15. made new friends: not rly; only early this year bc i transitioned from my secondary school to a polytechnic 16. fallen out of love: kinda?idk if changing biases counted as falling out of love? 17. laughed until you cried: i think so;; now i miss my old friends 18. found out someone was talking about you: not rly but i always think that someone does 19. met someone who changed you: yeah 20. found out who your friends are: they’ve been there since 2015 so nope 21. kissed someone on your Facebook list: um,, my mum?lol

GENERAL: 22. how many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: majority of them. i used to be a Swifitie so i talked to the Swifties on there and make friends with them but not anymore ofc 23. do you have any pets: no :( i want a pet cat 24. do you want to change your name: yeah, it’s too common. that’s why i’d rather be called “lish” :) 25. what did you do for your last birthday: i don’t rly remember? i think i was preparing for my o’s last year so i didn’t have a very fun bday party 26. what time did you wake up: 10am 27. what were you doing at midnight last night: watching dan and phil play “dream daddy” 28. name something you can’t wait for: for got7 to come to singapore!!!! they came last year but i wasn’t that big a fan :( 29. when was the last time you saw your mom: about half an hour ago? she went out to buy lunch and run errands 30. what is one thing you wish you could change in your life: i wish i could be more self-motivated 31. what are you listening to right now: down // fifth harmony 32. have you ever talked to a person named tom: holland 33. something that is getting on your nerves: i get so anxious and my brain feels like it is going to explode whenever i near the deadline for assignments  34. most visited website: tumblr, youtube, twitter 35. moles: one on my ear that looks like a piercing, one on the side of my left hand near the pinky 36. marks: tuans; jk i don’t have them, i think 38. hair colour: black?dark brown? 39. long or short hair: long 40. do you have a crush on someone: yugyeom 💕💞💓💗💖💘💝 41. what do you like about yourself: um, i can draw?i think // follow my art instagram (gotta get that promo)  42. piercings: nope; but people always mistake my mole on my ear for one 43. blood type: idek,, a? 44. nickname: lish (which i prefer people to call me; i’m grateful for that friend who made it but we don’t talk much anymore), alicia cheese (bc my last name is chee,, this is such a primary school joke), ciacia (sher-sher; my mum used to call me that) 45. relationship status: single  46. zodiac: dragon (chinese zodiac), taurus (if you mean my star sign) 47. pronouns: she/her 48. favourite tv show: shadowhunters, riverdale (these series are so problematic idek why i like them so much but i love shadowhunters bc i’ve read the mortal instruments and it’s lit af);; i don’t watch a lot of tv series now though 49. tattoos: nup 50. right or left handed: right 51. surgery: nope 52. hair dyed in different color: ashy colour or light blue 53. sport: i like badminton but i don’t play it much now 55. vacation: i went to hong kong, taiwan, japan and malaysia (too many times to count, especially genting) before but i want to visit london and south korea 56. pair of trainers:��i wear my school shoes (they are like sneakers) to play sports if that’s what trainers are for

MORE GENERAL 57. eating: not yet 58. drinking: my saliva 59. i’m about to: finalise what i have to present with my group on monday sighh 61. waiting for: my mother to buy lunch 62. want: to get this semester over with 63. get married: i will probably be single with my apartment full of cats 64. career: psychologist!! 65. hugs or kisses: both 66. lips or eyes: eyes 67. shorter or taller: taller (i mean, look at yugy) 68. older or younger: older 70. nice arms or nice stomach: nice arms 71. sensitive or loud: sensitive 72. hook up or relationship: relationship  73. troublemaker or hesitant: hesitant

HAVE YOU EVER: 74. kissed a stranger: no, im smol 75. drank hard liquor: no, im smol 76. lost glasses/contact lenses: nope; but i stepped and sat on my glasses before and i’ve never worn contact lenses before 77. turned someone down: nope; no one has ever asked me out before, it’s always me who confess to them (i don’t do that now) 78. sex on the first date: no, im smol 79. broken someone’s heart: no 80. had your heart broken: i guess? 81. been arrested: no 82. cried when someone died: ofc 83. fallen for a friend: i liked him before i was even friends with him but yeah, i got over him now?i think? i still have dreams abt him u gh

DO YOU BELIEVE IN: 84. yourself: i want to ,,but idk 85. miracles: kinda 86. love at first sight: n o 87. santa claus: i didn’t believe in him since the beginning, i think; i mean he is a white guy and i live in an asian country so when i was little, i thought i never rly saw these kind of people where i live (is this offensive,, sorry) 88. kiss on the first date: depends; i’ve never gone on a date with anyone before 89. angels: i mean jimin, yugyeom, hoseok and jackson exist so yeah

OTHER: 90. current best friend’s name: i have a couple of close friends now but not rly best friend? it’s too early for that, i’ve only just known these people for a few months 91. eye colour: dark brown?black? 92. favourite movie: currently my fav movie is split (when dr fletcher was like what if people with D.I.D. have unlocked the full potential of the brain, i was positively shookt) and guardians of the galaxy vol i. and ii. (gotg never gets old, it’s the shit y’all)

[brownthrussy]

1-85

Wade you got me fucked up smfh jk

1.) Are looks important in a relationship?:To some extent yes, since its kinda a attention grabbed. Eventually the personality is what becomes more important.

2.) Are relationships ever worth it?:Most are, as long as they’re healthy, but some are better off ending.

3.) Are you a virgin?:I hope my mom doesn’t see, but no. If my mom ever sees this then hell yeah I am lmao.

4.) Are you in a relationship?:Surprisingly yes

5.) Are you in love?:Considering my lack of love interests and mainly unhealthy relationships surrounding me, its hard to tell for myself but I believe I am yeah

6.) Are you single this year?:Jeez I hope not lol

7.) Can you commit to one person?:Yes.8.) Describe your crush:Hmm normal lenght hair, dark eyes, average height and thicc

9.) Describe your perfect mate:Sounds similar to 8 but I guess someone I can be comfortable and relate with.

10.) Do you believe in love at first sight?:No lmao im pretty sure thats a crush.

11.) Do you ever want to get married?:It’d be nice someday so sure lol

12.) Do you forgive betrayal?:Depends on the situation and how the person thats asking for forgiveness acts. If they learned their lesson and understand what they did wrong then I could forgive possibly but if not then no.

13.) Do you get jealous easy?:No lol its cause im bad at taking hints so I cant tell when someones hitting on me or el bae

14.) Do you have a crush on anyone?: Mi novio lol

15.) Do you have any piercings?:Nope lol

16.) Do you have any tattoos?:Nah lol

17.) Do you like kissing in public?:Nah lol i dont like being the center of attention

ERROR: 18 and 19 DOESN’T FUCKING EXIST??

.

20.) Do you shower everyday?:Si

21.) Do you think someone has feelings for you?: Well I hope my bf likes me lmao

22.) Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?: hmm its possible so sure lol

23.) Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat?: Well i’ve been doing it so yeah lol

.

24.) Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?: i don’t think so but hey who knows what future me will do lol

25.) Do you want to be in a relationship this year?: i want to keep it so yes lol

26.) Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you?: Si

27.) Has someone ever written a song or poem for you?: Not that I know of lol

28.) Have you ever been cheated on?: Officially no, but I had a few suspicions from my ex so it wouldn’t surprise me

29.) Have you ever cheated on someone?: No

30.) Have you ever considered plastic surgery? If so, what would you change about your body?: I’m ok really lol

31.) Have you ever cried over a guy/girl?: lmfao yes sadly.

32.) Have you ever experienced unrequited love?: Yeah. With my “ex”, we weren’t officially in a relationship we were just dating.

33.) Have you ever had sex with a man?: no homo but yeah lol

34.) Have you ever had sex with a woman?: tbh i just don’t support that lifestyle… i have straight friends tho so es cool

35.) Have you ever kissed someone older than you?: si

36.) Have you ever liked one of your best friends?: Nah lol I love them in a platonic way

37.) Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated? No lol

38.) Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to? Yeah lifes pretty wild

39.) Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?: yeah lmao its terrible 0/10 would not recommend

40.) Have you ever written a song or poem for someone? No im not an artistic person

41.) Have you had sex sex so far this year? Si but im staying a virgin til marriage

42.) How long can you just kiss until your hands start to wander? Depends on the mood I guess???

43.) How long was your longest relationship? Lmao the current one so almost a year!

44.) How many boyfriends/girlfriends have you had? 1 lol

45.) How many people did you kiss in 2011? Lmfao 0 I was an awkward disaster back then. Now i’m slightly less but with a better fashion sense.

46.) How many times did you have sex last year? Idk I wasnt counting lol but life fucked me over alot so that counts too right?

47.) How old are you? Believe it or not, but i’m 21 lol

48.) If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say? Well rip my relationship then but it’d be something like “she ain’t ugly but she ain’t me”

49.) If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, what is your favorite thing about him/her? Hmm I like the attentiveness and los jokes

50.) If your first true love knocked on your door with an apology and presents, would you accept? If its just forgiveness then probably yeah. Regardless im taking the presents tbh as compensation

51.) Is there a boy/girl who you would do absolutely everything for? Yes

52.) Is there anyone you’ve given up on? Nah they usually leave me first before I can say im done

53.) Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are? No lol my business is my own

54.) Is there someone you will never forget? My ex and former close friends tbh

55.) Share a relationship story: well we went to olive garden cause I had never gone. So I was feeling like a rich white woman cause it looked fancy and the waited asked if he could toss the salad for us. My stupid ass thought he either meant in a sex term or literally flipping it. Guess what I mentioned out loud. So homeboy leaves and I realize I can never return here without realizing that i assumed that the waiter wanted a fucking threesome because I spend too much time looking at memes smh. Oh and he spilled drinks on the people next to us including this lady and her phone so guess who got tipped good cause id die if i were in his position smh. Moral of the story is this is why I shouldnt go out

56.) State 8 facts about your body: I have a fat stomach, yet skinny arms and legs lol, i got a birthmark by my right shoulder that looks like hawaii apparently, if one hand moves the other tends to attempt to do the same thing, i got my apendix removed, theres a scar from said surgery on it, I barely have body hair but it grows quick, i accidently stabbed myself with a led pencil. The led remains up to today

57.) Things you want to say to an ex: Someone is contradicting themselves lmao sorry for not being what you wanted but you could’ve treated me like a decent human being. But I guess im unreasonable for wanting trust and communication lol oh well

58.) What are five ways to win your heart?: food, pokemon, more video games, trying ya best and being direct with one another.

59.) What do you look like? (post a picture!): so like do i post a new selfie in a seperate post or???? Eh ill do that later

60.) What is the biggest age difference between you and any of your partners? 6-7 years 😥 lol

61.) What is the first thing you notice in someone? How they react to situations lol says alot as a first perspective

62.) What is the sexiest thing someone has done for/ to you? Bought me food 😍

63.) What is your definition of having sex? Well it involves a penis usually afjvhadaish

64.) What is your definition of cheating? Well besides doing it physically, by lying to your S/O about not seeing anyone else and talking to others with the intention of cheating

65.) What is your favorite foreplay routine? Loving jesus

66.) What is your favorite roleplay? Reading the bible together.

67.) What is your idea of the perfect date? It involves eating, going out doing anything since anything can be fun if you’re with the right person. If it gets everything that is stressful about life and makes it seem irrelevant at the moment then this is the moment

68.) What is your sexual orientation? No homo but men are ok. So un homosexual

69.) What turns you off? Well acting like a child or being rude and dismissive.

70.) What turns you on? Communication and trust can I get an amen

71.) What was your kinkiest wet dream? Ok so there I am in battle wearing regular armor but with channel boots and I destroy my enemies by walking on them since they wronged me. There’s also lesbians.

72.) What worlds do you like to hear during sex? Are you feeling it now, Mr.Krabs???

73.) What’s something sweet you’d like someone to do for you? Anything really, its mainly the thought that matters

74.) What’s the most superficial characteristic that you look for? Hmm facial features and eyes lol

75.) What’s the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for you? Gave me the pink power ranger pop lol my girl

76.) What’s the sweetest thing you have ever done for someone? I gave a rare pop as a gift for christmas. It cost $50 lmfao

77.) What’s your opinion on age differences in relationships? As long as its legal and consensual then its alright

78.) What’s your dirtiest secret? Dont got any lol not any that come to mind atleast

79.) When was the last time you felt jealous? Why? Idk middle school lol crush had the nerve to talk to someone that wasnt me smh. Im glad i grew up and learned

80.) When was the last time you told someone you loved them? Whenever I see my best friend and hes about to do some dumb shit

81.) Who are five people you find attractive? So is this like from tumblr or anywhere?. Hmm theres mi novio, my best friend and fuck it like 3 of my mutuals lmao i almost tagged em

82.) Who is the last person you hugged? My younger sister

83.) Who was your first kiss? An old friend lol we dont talk no more

84.) Why did your last relationship fail? I have no idea. My ex was like “i gotta be alone” then pulled the “we’re different” card. And I figured it was both until my friend showed me that he was on tinder with an updated bio and photos that he had sent to me initially. So I guess ill never know lol

85.) Would you ever date someone off of the internet? Yeah why not lol if the connection is there

[birdysnow]

Who is your favorite OC? Pls share their backstory I must know👀

to be honest it’s totally Devon. I’ve had him sinceee about the 6th grade, and he’s been concrete since about 7th grade (I’m almost a junior!). He’s so important to me :’). Whenever I feel sad I just work on him or write about him and it cheers me up real fast. 

haha his backstory is a loooong, complicated mess. I literally went on an 1.5-2 hour rant about his backstory at a sleepover once, it was ridiculous how long it took for me to talk about him. I actually wrote a response for this ask yesterday, but it got deleted I hate my life. It was soooo long because I wrote it in the way I speak. You’re probably getting a lot more than you bargained for :’). I’ll put it below the cut so everyone else doesn’t suffer. 

im gonna use bullet points bc i like them and theyre shorter

note: universe is like. sci-fi. there’s space stuff you know

full name: Devon Mateo Westmore

born: August 16th 

a leo!!! do with that what you will

as far as parents go, they’re kinda dicks basically

Devon was a complete accident and he’s kind of treated as such

they’re pretty neglectful?? they really dont give a crap abt him frankly

they’re more interested in making bank with their jobs and turning up

has a sister who’s like graduating or smthn. she’s old. her name’s Lucía. 

she also could give less than a crap about him and had a similar experience with their parents; just wants to be free and have no attachment to this rando baby 

is a total Problem Child™ during school because of his messy life, just wants attention and love really but never really gets it

universally hated by teachers all his life

high school is especially rough he is a disaster

he’s basically like party all day every day bitches bc is parents are never home/probably wouldnt reprimand him for going out anyways

he drinks a lot, does drugs 

he bangs a lot of people irresponsibly. A LOT of people.

is a player tbh he will flirt with anyone. very pansexual. 

makes a lot of (bad) friends 2 fill the Void™ and does a lot of illegal things

anyway fast forward to when he’s like 17-18 and school’s like yep time to graduate!! and hes basically like

but he does graduate in order for the story to move forward

but now he’s like careers????????

all he’s kind of enjoyed is music throughout high school but he’s like thats not what i want to do. 

yolo, he probably says to himself one day. I’ll just join the military and become a space pilot because thats what I wanted to do when i was 8

so BASICALLY i haven’t figured out how I want this space military to work but he ends up in like an academy (he’s like around 19ish) or smthn 

this is where he starts to like chill tf out tbh

he discovers that he likes this a lot?? and he’s like dedicated to it???

a lot of like. coping happens and he has to figure out what kind of person he wants to be and recover™ himself

but yah he does well and he ends up being valedictorian nice going m8 

basically if you’re #1 in your class you get the opportunity to go to this like. school/training thingy. and it’s very exclusive but if you like graduate from their you’re like. set 

its like harvard except you could die there 

yolo, he thinks in yet another life decision he really shouldn’t be taking lightly. I want $$$$ so i’m about to make that place my bitch

he does not make that place his bitch

he suffers so much

by the end of the year/2 years he’s there, he does pretty well

He makes a bunch of good friends, and he gets a ton of experience. he’s really good because of it, as to be expected

while there the top of the class is this girl and her name is Adella

shes my daughter

Devon likes her but she’s like super stand-offish and he’s a party kid so he’s like

“hard pass.”

but he has like mad respect and he thinks she’s chill

the feelings mutual

anyways like RIGHT before they graduate she gets recruited to this special program because she’s top of the class and like disappears he never sees her again

sike

but not for a while at least……………

so like fast forward he’s like 23 maybe

he’s got a good job, he’s living it up really?? he’s just like pretty happy all around he has a life, an apartment, friends

he gets an email from this girl and she’s like yo

I’m Tamara, my mother passed away recently but I discovered that our parents are apparently siblings?? I never knew I had a cousin, I heard you live in the area and I was just wondering if you wanted to get to know each other 

and hes basically like damn if i’m about to pass up this chance!!!!!!!!

Tamara works as a programmer literally one (1) city away 

basically they just?? end up getting along really well?? Devon spends a lot of his off days hanging out with her

he’s so ecstatic to finally have someone who’s his family like she treats him like a little brother

probably Tamara also has a younger sibling, their name is Calix. they work as a doctor and dont see Tamara often but the two are close regardless

they’ll be important later but for rn they’re not relevant

anyway, at some point they make plans for Devon to meet Tamara and he ends up at her work

and she’s chilling with this guy who is absolutely

fucking

gorgeous

Devon’s sure he died, right there, behind a goddamn cubicle,,

he’s frantically trying to think up something suave to say (are you the only tennessee no– wait–) when Tamara notices him

she introduces him to her hot friend, his name is Shay

Devon tries to play it cool

“Hey would you mind if Shay came w–”

“NO NOT AT ALL I WOULDNT MIND”

they go out for lunch

he chills out a little bit on the way enough to be his usual self

Shay mistakes flirting for good-natured joking

Devon suffers

They exchange numbers 

cue pining 

Shay continues to be oblivious

He has to be told point blank by Tamara whos like “Please, for the love of all that is good, fuck him go on a date with my cousin.”

“Has he been asking me on dates every time he takes me out?? every time??”

I love Shay so much u dont even know

Shay is basically a really pure and happy person, literally nothing can get him down ever he’s just trying to live his best life

he’s everything to Devon, he’s so sunshiney and nice and Devon has just been through some stuff and his life is going well and now he has been blessed with this beautiful, perfect boy….,,,

it’s not like Devon has never dated anyone before, most of his relationships have been purely physical but he’s been in romantic relationships w people

but this is like. it he knows it. 

they date for about a year, everything’s fantastic

and then

things are heating up politically, and Devon’s in the military so they need him somewhere else

right now everyones living in like?? around india somewhere and they need him in like. canada.

hes understandably upset

he’s gotta move. acROSS THE GLOBE.

he’s not going to break up with bae but they’ve got to talk through this like Adults™

so they talk through it

and Shay’s basically like

“fuck no, i’m moving with you idiot

did you think you were just going to move away from me bench?? sike”

they move in together

I used to have their apartment layout drawn up on homestyler but they reset the system and it’s gone into the void so i’ll have to remake it :’)

so now they’re moved in which is super great everything is popping

remember Calix? they’re relevant again

basically, Calix has been dating this girl for a while now and they’ve gotten serious but their relationship is not working out because she is a mess tbh and they love each other very much but they are not good for each other

Calix isn’t emotionally receiving or helpful he’s very blunt so they end up splitting up because she doesn’t need a relationship  

Said girl is Adella

Adella is a mess basically

the program she was recruited for made her very successful, very well known in her field and in a lot of ways, among common people

but downside is there was a lot of government dirty work she was kind of pressured into doing

there’s also a lot of hush hush skirmish’s that have been occurring that she had to stop

she’s been struggling with depression for a lot of her life and she has PTSD so when her contract is up she decides to take a break™ 

her and Calix’s relationship kind of falls apart but she’s friends with Tamara and she’s like I need to leave somewhere and get out of this messiness, i’m going to move back home (Canada)

Tamara is like

LIGHTBULB DING DING DING

she doesn’t think that Adella shoudnt be on her own, she wants someone to supervise her and make sure she doesnt accidentally starve or smthn

she has the best intentions but she kind of tricks Devon and Shay tbh

“Hey you guys got an apartment with an extra room?? Can you take in my friend for a while, she’ll pay rent, she has a job she’s just trying to find a nice place to live but she needs to move to the area rn”

the two of them are like “yeah sure lol sounds legit tammy we ly

Adella shows up on their doorstep with the intention to live there for like 2 years

cue Shay internally flipping his shit over this lowkey celebrity whos going to LIVE in HIS APARTMENT DEVON DID YOU CLEAN THE KITCHEN

Devon is not phased 

he knows Adella from school so he’s just kind of like hey its u whats banging girlie

he basically just treats her like normal and she is so appreciative 

basically they become SQUAD i love them and thats the beginning of my story and thus ends background 

i’m sorry this was so long i tried so hard but i got carried away. double sorry for taking so long I have like 3 end of school projects due rip me

Thank you so much for asking!! I can’t tell you how much it means to me :’)) If you made it this far through my story I applaud you. thanks for reading!!! Feel free to message me if you have any questions 

[pinkhoodiemark]

70 QUESTIONS

tagged by @sho-ho-hownu ! [Ily more mutuals <33]

1. do you have a good relationship with your parents? Yes. Sometimes it’s rough but you know everyone has that. I’m closer to my mom’s bf more than my actual father, but im just now getting reconnected with my actual dad and it’s going ok i guess

2. who did you last say “i love you” to? probably my mom? It was like she said “I love you” and I said “love you too” does that count.

3. do you regret anything? Yes. I cant think of anything specific but i just know that i do...

4. are you insecure? HA YEAH ALMOST ALWAYS WHEN IM OUT OF MY HOUSE.

5. what’s your relationship status? Single afff Ready to mingle (?)

6. how do you want to die? epically B) idk tbh tho

7. what did you last eat? Omurice. It’s like friedrice with ketchup with an omelette over it. It’s japanese idk how to explain it well lol

8. played any sports? Idid Ballet as a toddler (like until 5 years old). From 7-14 years old I did gymnastics and I was on the “Junior Olympics” team which i dont think means anything but it sounds cool

9. do you bite your nails? nahh. I never understood that really

10. when was your last physical fight? I’m lazy. Not a fighter. But i shoved this bitch in middleschool because she confronted me about me tlking shit about her talking shit about me??

11. do you like someone?

Other than those 7 dorks? Nope. Thank god

12. have you ever stayed up 48 hours? Yes. It was partytime

13. do you hate anyone at the moment? No, I try not to hate. Unless theyre asshole racists, sexist, and/or hateful themselves.

14. do you miss someone? Family in Japan <3

15. have any pets? a tool named Phichit (or Peaches) that is my Betafish.  (stop i know it’s a Yuri On Ice name. I. Know...) . I know he only likes me for the food i give him. Rude.

16. how exactly are you feeling at the moment? okay. it was bad like 2 minutes ago because of an assignment but now im watching Mystery Science Theater 3000 and its funny af

17. ever made out in the bathroom? Had to think bout it for a sec but nope

18. are you scared of spiders? Not like SCARED but i’d rather not them be on me tho..

19. would you go back in time if you were given the chance? Without the butterfly effect happening? Then sure

20. where was the last place you snogged someone? I had to look up what this was omfg. Maybe like a year ago. I’ve been single for a whileeee.

21. what are your plans for this weekend? I’m meeting up with my dad to watch the last few episodes of walking dead on Saturday. Studying for my Japanese final.

22. do you want to have kids? how many? Kinda, At most 2. But Im like 19 years old so its weird to think about...

23. do you have piercings? how many? Nooo

24. what is/are/were your best subject(s)? was Math now probably none of them loll  #artmajor

25. do you miss anyone from your past? not really? There’s this one guy that was fun to hang with and I liked him for a loooong time and i still think about him sometimes lolll DontDoThat

26. what are you craving right now? a good nights rest

27. have you ever broken someone’s heart? I mean ive broken up with people but i dont think I like shattered their heart. I’m not THAT important omg

28. have you ever been cheated on? Nope. Hopefully never will?

29. have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? Yep, but he was mentally fucking craZY SO

30. what’s irritating you right now? Tumblr in incognito mode is slow af for some reason (I needed it to log in to my other tumblr without logging off this one)

31. does somebody love you? Family probably ha

32. what is your favourite color? Green

33. do you have trust issues? not really. I mean everyone should have some sort of trust issues. But i dont have severe trust issues.

34. who/what was your last dream about? I was listening to Departure album when I fell asleep, so I dreamt i was at a got7 concert lmao

35. who was the last person you cried in front of? I dont cry a lot tbh. So i dont remember. When I do cry I dont like people seeing.

36. do you give out second chances too easily? HA NOPE. They gotta work for a second chance

37. is it easier to forgive or forget? Depends. If it’s not that big of a deal then forget. I hate confrontation but i need an apology if its something bigger.

38. is this year the best year of your life? Noooooooooo, but we’re only like a quarter through so it could change. But im not too hopeful about those chances tbh

39. how old were you when you had your first kiss? kiss that didnt matter (pocky/pepero game lol): 14 Kiss that mattered: 16

40. have you ever walked outside completely naked? wtf no.

51. favourite food? Too many to narrow down to one but i crave toast a lot

52. do you believe everything happens for a reason? yeah, I’d like to think so.

53. what is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? Watched a horrible movie

54. is cheating ever okay? Who would think it is??? Even as “revenge” that’s low

55. are you mean? Dude, I’m a bitch tbh...

56. how many people have you fist fought? 1

57. do you believe in true love? i guess. If I didn’t then what would be the point of relationships?

58. favourite weather? Suns hot but cool breeze or light rain

59. do you like the snow? Yeah, but i could go without it...

60. do you wanna get married? Eh.

61. is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? I’d cringe.

62. what makes you happy? dogs, cats, other peoples genuine smiles, got7

63. would you change your name?   I like my name

64. would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? Who was the last person i kissed? So probably no...

65. your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? Assuming im not interested. Id just ignore it. If he confesses Id be like sorry bro.

66. do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? I did. But he’s kind of out of my circle now that college started.

67. who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? Mom’s boyf. Jose. He’s cool. Been in most of my life so not like a random Mom  boyf

68. who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? My sister. We were talking about why people just constantly feel the need to hate. Even if it’s something like (for example) “I HATE One Direction” Like do you honestly “hate” one direction. Or did you see that other people “hates” one direction so you said that. Like what did One Direction do for you to just HATE them... Like I dont like them or dislike them but I could never say that i HATE them. I dont even know them... anyway that discussion gets me heated

69. do you believe in soulmates? Kinda

70. is there anyone you would die for? Yeah. Like family and junk

Tagging @peachyjyp @husbandsjjp @soulmatesjjp @got7arrived @ult2jae ya dont gotta

[dong-hyucks]

92 Truths

I was tagged by @btsgroupchat​ ^^

I apologize for not posting your requests several times in a row, but I thought that I would just do this now~

Rules: you gotta answers questions and then tag 20 others (i don’t talk to like anyone riP--)

THE LAST… 1.Drink: Water

2.Phone call: Grandma

3.Text message: ‘My house smells like smoke. My mom may or may not have set the grill on fire.’ to my friend... do i need to explain this one haha

4.Song you listened to: BTOB - Movie

5.Time you cried: Earlier today because I was annoyed and had a headache, which usually makes me cry (im a crybaby lol)

6.Dated someone twice: no lol

7. Been Cheated on: nope ^

8.Kissed someone and regretted it: yes actually ><

9.Lost someone special: two people this year

10.Been depressed: sadly

11.Gotten drunk and thrown up: i mean-- i’m fourteen so, so no i’d hope not

LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS:

12. Purple [violet / lavender]

13. Black

14. Blue [baby / electric]

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU… 15.Made new friends: surprisingly yes 16.Fallen out of love: romantically, no 17.Laughed until you cried: there is actually something wrong with my eyes and they water a lot easier than they should so... like everyday 18.Found out someone was talking about you: yeah >< they were insulting me oops-- (psst i can hear you) 19.Met someone who changed you: absolutely 20.Found out who your true friends are: i hope i do 21.Kissed someone on your Facebook list: no?? thats awkward lol GENERAL… 22.How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: all 81 of them 23.Do you have any pets: a dog (she’s an adorable shih-tzu/maltese poodle <3) 24.Do you want to change your name: sometimes, since there are like seven annoying people with the same name at school, but i would just be knocking off the ‘n’ so there isn’t really any point 25.What did you do for your last birthday: went to the movies with my friends then hung out at my house (choked on food like twice oops) 26.What time did you wake up: 6:30 AM like always 27.What were you doing at midnight last night: writing 붙잡았어야 해 lyrics in a notebook while watching sensory couple 28.Name something you cannot wait for : my brother’s grad in a few months... i’m actually proud of him but he doesn’t need to know that lol 29.When was the last time you saw your mother: like fifteen minutes ago 30.What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: i can’t name just one thing tbh 31.What are you listening to right now: Monsta X - Beautiful w/ the voice playing in the bg 32.Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: yup 33.Something that is getting on your nerves: grades? stress? school? peOPLe? 34.Most visited website: tumblr i have no life 35.Elementary: ‘graduated’ last year 36, High School: in my first year atm 37.College: x 38.Hair color: brown w/ blonde streaks (i regret bleaching it so much) 39.Long or short hair: long 40.Do you have a crush on someone: nope 41.What do you like about yourself: getting into kpop three years ago (thx me) 42.Piercings: two on my ears but I kinda want helix/upper lobe piercings 43.Blood type: i honestly don’t know but it might be A idk 44.Nickname: Jade 45.Relationship status: single, as it always will be ^^; 46.Zodiac sign: : aquarius [feb. 18] 47.Pronouns: : she/her 48.Favorite tv show: i love watching ncis 49.Tattoos: none 50.Right or left hand: Right FIRST… 51.Surgery: i was like two and it was for my teeth but i don’t know what exactly 52.Piercing: just my ears 54.Sport: i do volleyball and snowboarding 55.Vacation: vancouver most likely we go there like once/two times a year 56.Pair of trainers: idk 57.Eating: i just had dinner 58.Drinking: water 59.I’m about to: go read 61.Waiting for: nana [jaemin] to come back healthy and well rested 62.Want: chocolate, pain killers, money to buy albums... 63.Get married: in the far, far future if im lucky 64.Career: i want to be an english professor [says the one who is too lazy to capitalize her words] WHICH IS BETTER… 65.Hugs or kisses: hugs~ they’re warm >< 66.Lips or eyes: eyes 67.Shorter or taller: idc about other’s height 68.Older or younger: i still don’t care as long as it’s legal lol 70.Nice arms or nice stomach: : wha? 71.Sensitive or loud: i can be both, so both 72.Hook up or relationship: Relationship 73.Troublemaker or hesitant: both HAVE YOU EVER… 74.Kissed a stranger?: yes, it was weird 75.Drank hard liquor? : foUrTeEn yEarS oLD 76.Lost glasses contact/lenses? : yup... my glasses and they were on my head 77.Turned someone down?: yes... im sorry >< 78.Sex on first date?: uh no?? 79.Broken someone’s heart?: unfortunately :( 80.Had your heart broken?: yup :( 81.Been arrested?: no 82.Cried when someone died?: yes 83.Fallen for a friend?: no DO YOU BELIEVE IN… 84.Yourself?: eh 85.Miracles?: sure 86.Love at first sight?: attraction** at first sight, no 87.Santa Claus?: yAs it’s finland (says the person who has not watched hetalia) 88.Kiss on the first date?: sure?? 89.Angels?: i guess OTHER…. 90.Current best friend’s name: ares + sam 91.Eye color: dark, dark brown 92. Favourite movie: i loved the conjuring

That’s it~ I tag: (idk if any of these people have done it, so i’m sorry if i tagged you if you already have~ these are just mutuals that i/past admins have followed)

@jungwoosnatchedmyweave​, @mile-ruichi​, @baekhyun-hanburger​, @marksmushroomhair​, @koreanscenes​, @armygirl1707​, @the-tiny-2j​, @yoongiismydrug​, @kpopscenariosreactsshipping​, @shitbtsreactionsandtexts​, @swervingkpoptrashcan​, @kpop-text-messages​, @hinarashimawara​, @whatifwearefiction​, @beaniechiminie, @ham001s, and since i don’t have anymore mutuals imma just tag anyone who wants to do this :) just tell me so i can check your blog out~

i dont talk to any of my mutuals (unless im on anon) >< im sorRY YOU FOLLOWED A SOCIALLY AWKWARD PERSONandwiafwahfihw-- i love all of their blogs but idk how to speak ^

bonus:

93. Ultimate bias: LEE DONGHYUCK / DONGHYUK / HAECHAN / BEAUTIFUL BOY OF NCT

[feminizm-by-zo]

When Your B.S. Feels Like BS...

Homework is all done, tests are done, no more lectures, what do I do… Do i regret anything? Here’s your simple answer, no. I do not resent my college experience. I actively try to live with the choices I make and the paths I choose to take along the way. Overall, despite inevitable bumps in the road that is college and my young adult years 18-21, I had a wonderful time. I made lifelong friends, joined clubs, found my voice, learned about who I am and learned about things in class (because school…) There are so many amazing parts of college and there are a great number of awesome things about being all done with it but something just doesn’t feel right.

I’m having a hard time coming up with the right word to explain my experience, but in my LONG (lol just kidding) 3 months since graduation I have struggled with some things that I feel college failed to not only prepare me for, but even mention..

This isn’t organized because I did my college homework and got the degree already so I’m freeeeeee BUT, here’s some genuine (please do better than me at life) advice and just stuff for your brain:

1. GO to the career center starting from freshmen year–> brainstorm ways to make your resume not just be great but STAND OUT, complete at least TWO internships (different cities and roles is ideal), talk about your future OPTIONS (grad school, work, parent, military, etc.)

2. Do NOT let any one or group of people pressure you into a future “plan” that your heart isn’t fully committed to–> I had the most wonderful professors that I trusted and admired but they never discussed options about my future OTHER THAN graduate school and for that matter it HAD TO BE right away and it HAD TO BE a PhD program. Not until I left did I realize, uh do I want to do this? and in fact I felt inferior for considering a masters program or no program at all (COME ON, all of those options are great ones)

3. I saw this today and I loved it, “sleep more than you study, study more than you party, and party as much as you can” –> please make your silly mistakes in college because there are so many people to catch you when you fall and/or get drunk and THEN fall. Take risks now, please. I didn’t and I’m still working on how to truly LIVE, but college would have been the time

4. Go outside your damn campus –> I don’t care what city or town your school is in, literally go outside of your school (buddy system…) My school wasn’t in a great area but one of my fondest memories was volunteering with such wonderful women outside of my campus. Plus, even if your campus food is good (???? where do you go), try out some restaurants yum yum

5. Make a NEW friend –> nah girl, I’m not talking about a mutual friend that you see and hang out with through association with someone else, I’m talking go big and talk to someone in class or literally walk up to someone and say be my friend. Not everyone is as inclined or comfortable being awkward as I am but if they’re weird about it they aren’t worth your time

6. Join a club you know nothing about –> for the love of G-d go learn something new in college. I almost could have tried to thought about (lol) joined the rowing team. My excuse was that they wake up early but to hell with that because those guys were awesome and I would have had a great time learning something new!

7. Take that nap –> Okay a lot of people would disagree with me here because “you never remember the nights you went to sleep” but trust me, sometimes waking up from a mid day coma can cure the oncoming college plague going around or will make you feel a bit better about the 249745 assignments you have due tomorrow (i do NOT miss that). Do it, take care of yourself

8. Make pals with your professors –> well duh, keep the professional-ness a thing but they are such cool actual PEOPLE. they don’t spend their WHOLE lives talking at you. They have pets, and hobbies and they know a lot of really cool stuff. Find a professor you heard about being cool or one that you know specializes in some sweet stuff and make an appointment with them. I met one of my mentors by literally emailing her and saying “hi i dont know you can i talk to you” (again with the awkwardness)

9. Erase that intimidation of “higher ups” thing you have in your noggin –> I became close with the president of my school through just making myself known in small, weird ways. Emailing him to ask his opinion on something, asking him to attend club events, literally stopping him to tell him something I want to see happen on campus. Those dudes and dudets “upstairs” are there to help you so make them dooo itt.

10. Just because you are qualified for a job or praised for your skills in one city/town/place does NOT mean it will be the same elsewhere –> here comes the tough love… I am definitely feeling like a pile of poo here wandering around DC with my resume because everyone wants the same thing, everyone is qualified, and everyone FOR SOME DAMN REASON has like 24 olympic gold medals BEFORE AN ENTRY LEVEL JOB. don’t give up, that’s my point.

11. Yes your mom is right that you’re special but I’m sorry, you are not one of a kind –> More tough love because I suck… okay so I am a recent college graduate in D.C., a feminist, liberal, jewish woman, “passionate”, “hard working”, “detail oriented” HAHAHAHA so is everyone else. Please please spend time in college finding a passion or niche that makes you at least .06% different than the masses because I blend right in and… hire me.

12. I guess I knew this but I didn’t realllllly know this, THE GYM AND THE HEALTHY FOOD IS FREE IN COLLEGE do it, eat it, idk beeee it –> gym memberships are mucho expensivo from $60-$329587970 per month in the real world so maybe take advantage of that gym now while you got it. AND damn, if i could buy some pomegranate seeds for less than $4 in this city i would love it but NOPE. Healthy food is so expensive, eat it now, save me some, send it to me.

13. Get a hobby –> that sounded rude but really, I need one. As much as I try yoga I don’t like it, it doesn’t relax me. Is netflix a hobby? I have an adult coloring book, does that count? NO. Just like in college there are clubs and groups in the real world that people are involved in like book clubs and women’s groups and political shin digs, JOIN SOME! Get passionate about somethin and do it in your free time.

14. College will tell you or at least it told me that there is ONE definition of success –> get a job before graduation, graduate, live in a fancy apartment, get a trophy wife (lol no thank you) and live happily ever after on a golf course. errrrrrr wrong, I’m really struggling with this but in college they tell you that you can do anything, and that’s true but at that same token YOU CAN DO ANYTHING. You can graduate and get married, go in the military, sit on the couch for a bit, live with your parents, take care of your mental health, etc. Do NOT do NOT let your college define what success is for you. Only you can do that and it will take some time. I’m not sure yet what mine is and i’m getting impatient but I’ll get there someday.

15. Pretend to be your own mother –> tell yourself to take care of yourself. physically, mentally, spiritually. Take that nap, take the medicine your doctor prescribed, cancel something with a friend if you need to, Be healthy.

16. Find your spirituality –> Sure I know my religion, I have ideas about my life and the “something bigger” but no one really lays it out for you that in college there are clubs and events (i.e. Hillel and Hanukkah dinners) but when you leave college you either have to seek out others who will join you in the creation of a club or organization OR (more likely) you have to figure out (probably by trial and error) what pieces of your religion and your upbringing you want to keep in your own adult life and maintain. It’s important, whatever it may be, remembering there is something bigger is helpful when you’re “on your own”

17. This will depend on the person you are but remember, be wise BUT money is just paper –> health and happiness are the most important parts of your life and after college (which you and I were so lucky to have the opportunity to attend) you need to remember that money will come, but health is of the utmost importance. Of course there will be times that money is a priority cause well, girl’s gotta live and eat but remember that it is not the end all be all of your life.

18. (if you’re still in college) pick a major that you LOVE and a minor that is MARKETABLE –> thanks to my daddio for this tip and not thanks for me for not doing this but out here in the cold lonely real world (lol), most entry level jobs have administrative, communications and marketing tasks. Do ya know how to do that? Get on it. Sometimes I feel like my degree only prepared me to play a very narrow focused game of jeopardy………

19. I don’t know if this is actually true but somewhere I saw that you have the most friends and biggest (real life) social network at 25 years old, embrace it –> mhmm all your pals in college are wonderful and there are many you will keep and maintain relationships with but some, I’m sorry this is harsh, are because of convenience and proximity. Outside of college you will have to work harder to cultivate relationships and friendships by truly being there for one another. You will find your circle just reach out! 

20. Keep learning –> again I feel like i got this jeopardy game thing down but when it comes to having intellectual conversations at times I feel lost (and I hate myself for it) because I studied something pretty narrow. Read the classics, watch the news, LEAN INTO THE CONVERSATION (literally and figuratively), attend events, see plays, i don’t know just learn random important things about this world we live in and what it has to offer. There is so much out there so go get it.

21. Know your worth –> In every way possible but since you might be in the position looking for work, know your worth in regards to salary. Not only should you negotiate your salary (no matter how scary that sounds) but you should also research it in your area that you have chosen to look for work. I’m embarrassed to say that before moving to D.C. I underestimated a good salary for myself by about $15k......uncomfortable. You are worth it, fight for it.

22. You can live wherever you want! –> This is the fun part, we are so used to being “stuck” in one location for college or family but you can literally pick anywhere in the world to live and thrive as a young adult. I chose D.C. for professional opportunities but I could have picked China?? No one is stopping you so go big, the older you get, the more responsibilities will hold you back from going somewhere outrageous. Do it, I dare you.

Oy vey, well… that’s all I got for now but I’m sure I’ll learn something new tomorrow or be annoyed/feel helpless about something else I don’t feel prepared for this week but for now, be grateful for where you are and take advantage of it. You can do it (that was also me trying to convince myself)… it’s hard… keep going… and/or napping

ZG. 3/1/17/