we carve up the world all the time
dazai; 795 words; domestic fluff, g!n reader but implied that they wear heels, tw for normal dazai things but i promise it's mostly played for comedic effect
a list of things that could be used as weapons around an average household, but neither you nor dazai want to talk about it:
the knife in the kitchen that neither of you ever use, the handle made of good, solid wood, the blade sharpened to a gleaming, moon-bright edge; occasionally, your hand will skim over it’s stained ironwood and pause, something thrumming like possibility beneath your skin. but then dazai wraps his arm around your middle, hooks his chin over your shoulder and asks when dinner will be ready; your hand skims over the handle and it settles on another knife, a smaller knife, a duller knife. you smile and tell him soon.
the memory foam pillows dazai had brought home one evening, hollering about the 50% off sale at the market across the street, even though you’d told him that morning that you guys didn’t need anything else, but he pouts and whines and sighs and throws himself onto the vintage chaise lounge (snagged at a yard sale, you know), all drama and sensitivity till you’d conceded that they were really nice pillows and your neck had been hurting a bit more than usual
the curtains — they’ve got such nice, long, tassels.
the curtains — they’ve got such nice, thick, blackout backs that coincidentally make them impossible to breathe through.
the pair of antique book ends that kunikida had gifted the pair of you the week you’d moved in, made of solid bronze, and carved into owls with their huge, dessert-plate eyes and their tiny, hooked beaks. dazai had alternated between loving them and hating them, but finally, he’d settled on saying that at least, if nothing else, they’d function as a good, matched pair of weights for a drowning attempt
the belt to dazai’s coat
the bottle of bleach sitting under the kitchen sink
your favorite pair of stiletto heels, with points sharp enough to pierce through a man’s heart; though dazai insists that you’d never need a pair of heels to pierces his — it was already yours to begin with
the handguns in the bedside table
the handguns hidden under the sofa
the handguns in the cupboards
the handguns in the bookshelf’s secret compartments
your favorite set of beige linen sheets, the material just soft enough to be breathable, but strong enough to last — they’d regrettably not been on sale, but even dazai had to agree that it was a worthy way to spend some cash. once, with the curtains thrown open and the moonlight spilling in great silver reams across the bedroom floors, dazai had pressed a hand to your cheek and told you that you’d make a beautiful corpse, to which you’d rolled your eyes and curled in closer and told him that if he got blood on the sheets, you’d make sure his own death was slow and most certainly painful
the whiskey rocks in the freezer, which, if thrown hard enough and fast enough, would be so much more deadly than bullets, but why waste perfectly good whiskey rocks when there’s still half a bottle of whiskey left?
your hands, with their soft, soft palms and their long, thin fingers; dazai spends too long thinking about your hands and the variety of different ways you might use them, and use them, and use them
his hands, with their neatly trimmed nails and bandaged wrists and the endless trail of blood that had long-since seeped it’s way beneath his skin, staining him till he’d believed salvation was a mere, distant fantasy. but then he’d met you and somehow, through some impossible, divine, dark magic, you’d made it all just a bit more worthwhile — still, he can’t deny the weapons that are his hands, his touch that negates so much else, but seems to only draw out the best in you. once, he’d dreamt that all your love had been nothing but an ability, and that as soon as he touched you, the spell might shatter, and you’d leave him, just like so many people had left him before, and as he had left so many other people. but then he woke up to find you sleeping next to him, your breath measured as the ticking metronome of the earth, as the certain passing of days and years, certain as the sunlight threatening to pour through the sliver of open curtain — and he dared to reach out and touch you, to trail a finger along your cheek, to watch your eyelids flutter open like a pair of moth wings to his hidden fire. and, you smiled, leaned in, and kissed him instead.
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