#first I was aware was him dropping the gem to beat a frog person (or something) to death

[agoosehonkingintothevoid]

Playing dwarf fortress and I have no idea why, but about half my visitors went crazy and started attacking my dwarfs? A couple if my dwarves died but mostly it was a complete bloodbath.

My best guess is it was somehow linked to the artefact theft attempt that happened at the same time somehow?

Anyway the corpses have been cleaned up so uh. I guess that's all fine?

[seb-owns-these-tatas]

Chapter 6 (Winter’s Gem) (Bucky Barnes AU)

CHAPTER 5

Characters: Bucky Barnes x You (AU)

Summary: Bucky Barnes has been scouted by your boss in Felicity Night, you were just a mere young, cleaner in Felicity night and have been living in the basement of the club for all your life. He's the most wanted Gigolo in the city, and taking him away from eager, thirsty women seemed to be impossible especially if he chose to be a Gigolo as his way of living.

Warning: Profanities. Detailed making out. Inappropriate words. ONE THIRSTY PROTAGONIST IN THE HOUSE. You'll thank me later! *wink wink nudge nudge* 

Words: 3,500 words.

A/N: This chapter is long again! Hehehehe! REBLOG, LIKE AND COMMENT AS YOU READ! GO CRAZY!

Disclaimer: PNG's and pictures aren't mine. However, the whole series, one shots and edits are from moi.

Taglists: @damnbuckyishot @yn-the-reader @iwillmakeyoucraveme @willpoch12 @anxiousamandapanda​ 

As you began to walk away from your friend, and his patriotic best friend Steve Rogers. Bucky was patient enough to walk you towards the hall. His metal hand grasping tight on your waist with your heart fluttering every once in a while as you stared up at his breathtaking, side profile.

"You're undeniably beautifuuuuuul," You muttered prolonging the 'u' with a tiny pout included. Your eyes glimmering from the beauty who stood beside you. Bucky had no difficulty in carrying your drunk self up in his room, and you were entirely thanking your drunk self that you were intoxicated because this was the first time that you'll be sneaking in a peep to see Bucky's room.

That is if you're only having a peep.

Your compliment caught his attention, making him glance down at you who kept looking at him like how you stare down at your food, completely hypnotized. He smiled a precious one, staring at your lips. "Not as beautiful as you, Y/N."

"I plan to disappoint, Booki."

He scoffed, shaking his head. "Hop, hop baby." Bucky muttered, his fingers clasping tighter when your foot got caught on one of the stairs leading the way towards his private room. You could only giggle, arm tightening around Bucky's neck in which he didn't mind at all. He was already basically carrying you way up, and you've wanted nothing more than to roll your eyes at him and tell that he should've carried you bridal style instead.

He just made himself suffer.

You blew air on his ear, making him go. "What the hell? Y/N.." Sounding irritated by how you blew on his ear, though the stunned irritation instantly faded from the moment he saw you pouting, eyes seeming to be a little watery from the intoxication, and cheeks slightly blushing. "Please don't hurt me," He stopped his steps, dragging you from his halt. Immediately staring down at you, his breathtaking, Steele blue eyes memorizing each and every part of your face that he didn't want to forget.

He repeatedly prayed to the heavens for that. Every damn day.

"I was just trying to be sweet," You quickly responded, scared that he would hate you too just like how your mother does and basically how other people sees you. A complete utter eyesore. Pain began seering your heart once the memories came crushing down on you like a brick. Your mother. The only woman and family in your life who happens to do nothing but inject pain and frustration in your fucked up life. She was one of a kind. A horrible kind.

Bucky licked his lips that seemed to turn dry when he realized how you took his response, interpretting it very differently. Totally a miscommunication especially when you're drunk and emotional. "Everything's new to me, everything's brand new. I know I'm starting to not make sense but," You paused, swallowing the saliva choking up your throat. "I know I'm one crazy, hopeless, lonely bitch. I'm giving you a heads up and one final chance for you to run the hills because you're in a relationship with an ugly janitress,"

Bucky looked at you incredulously, your words coming at him like a missile. He couldn't believe how low your self-esteem were. Totally opposite to what he sees from his perspective. You were basically the medicine to his sickness. No pun intended. He licked his lips, his mind completely elsewhere, finding the right words on how to respond to your rant.

His powdery steel blue eyes was set on you, adoring that certain glint in your eyes that made him want to keep you on his side at all costs, and dang was he whipped without him knowing. "Doll, you're not a bitch," Bucky muttered, lifting a hand to brush his thumb on your cheekbone like a person touching roses, "and I definitely won't run the hills because I'm dating a one of a kind janitress," He emphasized, his thumb tenderly caressing your face that made you feel electricity coursing through your face.

You instinctively took his hand that was affectionately holding your cheek, and your heart skipped a beat when he leaned in to press a kiss on your slightly pimpled forehead. One of your insecurities besides the fact that you had a high hairline. "Now, let's erase those horrid thoughts of yours, alright Sugar?" Your amazing boyfriend whispered in your ear before tugging you with him as you padded through the stairs, continuing your journey.

"Buckyyyyy," you slurred, drowsily blinking as you were watching your own foot step up the last stair. The world was spinning around you, just like a kaleidoscope world but with Bucky in it and it wasn't entirely horrible. Your gorgeously insane boyfriend hummed a reply, waiting for your response as his hands tightened around your waist, dragging you off and turning another hallway to get to your destination.

"Ppo-Ppo?" your words entertained him. He heard that as 'po-po' and thought you were planning on calling security for practically kidnapping you and planning to let you sleep in his headquarters. Simply to say, his room. "What?" he snickered, lowly cackling from your drunken slurs.  "You seriously want to call the police on me, Doll?"

You shook your head hard in disagreement.

Bucky's brows were left in a curious twist that made him pucker his lips in thought, suddenly stopping in your tracks. "Then what, Doll? What do you want?" he cooed, the ends of his tone sounding so tender, so sweet that it could make ants bite you for being so lucky in having him. Despite of his occupation inside the club you were working on, Felicity night.

He had your chin in between his index finger and thumb, gently lifting your head till your droopy eyes met his pale-blue ones that could make your toes curl in enthusiasm. Bucky hummed another soft reply, patiently waiting for your next words. "Kiss me?" you boldly puckered your lips out, tightly closing your eyes as you waited for him to just give you the peck you wanted.

Barnes was left gobsmacked. Staring at your pouted lips angled before him. The more longer he gets to be with you, the more so you surprise him with your characteristics and personality. He couldn't help himself but giggle and chuckle, never hesitating to lean down and give you a loud peck as he puckered his lips back, brushing his dewy, Crimson lips with yours. A satisfying smooch sound leaving his lips once he broke the peck.

"Is that good now?" the latter bluntly asked with a smirk.

You nodded repeatedly, satisfied with the reserved kiss he had just given, giggling in the process of your drunken slurs. "For now, my prince. This frog hasn't turned into a princess yet. Your kiss sucked," emphasis ended on your words.

James couldn't help but raise a brow at that, his smile never ceasing to drop whenever you were in his arms. "You'll get more kisses back in my room," he rasped, the pitch in his voice dropping an octave lower. Sounding utterly sexy for your panties to take.

The loud music faltered and faded as you took the last turn towards his room. Illuminated hallway. Red carpeted floor and dove white painted walls. The floor seemed too familiar for you, thus having a glimpse of a huge double door sat beside Bucky's room distracted your drunken stupor.

It was the boss' room.

Hence, why does your Bucky get to have the same floor as hers? Unlike the others who had their rooms on the second and yours which was unluckily down on the basement, living with the rats and mythical ghosts.

She scrambled onto her feet, giving the big boss' room a double take to verify the images appearing before her if it was true. The gentle, constant pull of her hips from the bewitching metal-armed man who kept on tugging your annoying self towards the the room he unfortunately owned and was given by the person whom must not be named in Winter's point of view.

Straight-grained, reddish brown timber of three tropical hardwood species came into view, your eyes were dreary, pie-eyed prior to your inebriation and also maybe because of a certain gorgeous, handsome motherfucker who managed to keep your mind in a daze despite of how he was doing such simple actions that could get you beguiled.

Bucky inserted the key he had been fumbling around his grey sweatpants; an accustomed measure in which he has been used to back when he was in Maximum Risk. Keeping his sanctuary safe from people whom you cannot trust is just around the corner, especially when he had that particular kind of job where people had the feeling of revenge in the palm of their hands.

He was still aware of people, ever had been since he was a child.

Basically, his mother selling him to different kinds of people when he was an obedient juvenile couldn't tape the trust back together like it was nothing.

To James Buchanan Barnes, trusting people is the least of his worries because he never does. Until you and Steve came along.

He never trusted the hearts of his customers, now that people around him were actually Judas in disguise. His whole life was pure complications and utter betrayals, and when you came along, he could finally see a light deep down the ground he was deeply submerged in. Even just a tiny light that could give him a hope that his life will become better despite of his contingencies.

"How did I ever swayed you, Booki?" you slurred like drunkard, slowly fluttering your eyes close and hearing his bedroom door open. The undeniably well built man swiftly caught you in his arms again, carrying you off your feet as you entered a room which seemed to be too dark for your liking.

Or maybe the lights weren't just still on?

"Mr. Barnes, is this your new way of showing me your red room?" a low, raspy chuckle emerged from the latter's chest which got you whistling like a weak wolf. You felt the cold vinyl tiles brush the bottom of your feet, lately realizing that he had you trapped inside his bathroom when you decided that having your eyes opened was better than keeping them closed.

In which you should have chose to kept them closed as you were faced with a clean, half body mirror.

Expletive profanities came running out of your mouth as you've seen your intoxicated self on the mirror. The homely warmth that your man could give was nowhere to be found, and it was then and there you heard the running water coming from the faucet signaled you that he was doing something you couldn't decipher.

"Is this your new way of inviting me over with a shower session?" you've curiously queried with a naughty smile. It immediately fell because the reflection you were seeing was starting to disappoint you and it was disheartening you big time. Bucky had a fresh damp towel in his flesh hand, he gave you a once over and saw how your smile smell. His initial reaction was to quickly rise from how he squatted inside his shower, swatting his dark shower curtains away before shuffling to his feet.

He didn't want you dancing in your own nightmares. You needed to step away from it, you needed to avoid it so you wouldn't have to become like him.

"Hey doll," The latter softly whispered against your ear, hinting a small accent that could make your toes curl beneath you and so you did. He appeared behind you with a small touch of his fingers on the small of your back, suddenly making you shiver in your own mistake. "Didn't I tell you not to curse when I'm around?"

His dominating stance, and the way his raspy, velvet voice which exerts authority had your heart skipping a thirsty beat and especially down there too.

"But, sir...." An embarrassing purr rolled off the tips of your tongue. You were too intoxicated for your own good, and you'll probably curse the heavens as to why Stan makes the best Martinis in town. You couldn't deny his wonderful offer, especially when it was free and all. Plus, the old goober was smiling in front of you like a Cheshire cat, a plan set on the back of his head which was also sipping its own glass of Margarita.

The old geezer had wicked plans if you've managed to squint your eyes back at him a little longer.

"Jesus Christ," he sternly uttered with a sharp in take of his breath and before you know it, your man had you in his brawny arms, derriere pinned down on his bathroom sink with your legs hastily parting for the latter to slip in between them. The crisp, icy temperature of his metal fingers grasping your jaw, keeping your slanted lips where he wanted as he continued his libidinous ministrations with you. Bucky's flesh hand on your waist, feeling a cool, moist-like cloth perched on your side and it was the towel he was ought to clean your face with.

His voluptuous Crimson red lips that had been in a constant fight of being bitten attacked your unpleasant, chapped lips. A bolt from the blue kept your mind stupefied because as much as you remembered, you were just loathing your very own reflection, yet now you were locking lips with your unofficial boyfriend.

Not that you were complaining because you've had this planned out inside your innocent mind already.

"You need," Bite. "to stop," Nibble. "swearing and," Kiss. "calling me sir," a secretive low moan which caught your ear as you nibbled his bottom lip back, "at the same time,"

Your drunken self couldn't help but feel the day-to-day itch forming in between your legs. It has been a-run-of-the-mill because of your restricted relationship with the highly requested Gigolo in east coast, the sudden impulse when he was around had been bugging you since day 1.

She had Bucky's face in between the palms of her hands, the growing five o-clock shadow tickling the sensitive tips of her fingers as she deepen her kisses. He was giving her the same intensity and probably a lot more than he intended to. There was a soft, involuntary moan which erupted out of you as you felt his probing tongue touch the tips of yours, igniting out a hitch of your breath when you sensed your fingers having its own mind of proceeding towards a place in which you've opted to fondle with.

"Yes," the latter breathlessly huffed in between kisses, feeling your soothing digits tenderly skim beneath his prominent, newly-clean shaven navel in a way that could get his crotch celebrating inside his pantaloons. You continued kissing him with the same ferocity, fondling over the waistband of his sweatpants before you felt cold, metal like fingers tightly grip your wrist to an unsatisfying halt. "N-No, no, not yet," he exasperated with a grump.

"Fuck," The thwarting gigolo muttered a few vulgar swearwords beneath his heaving breaths. You bit your lip with knotted eyebrows, a tight feeling in your chest which you so wanted to scream out loud because of your frustration as well. Didn't he want to continue because you were..you? Or--?

"You seriously leaving me frustrated like this, Booki?"

"Yes--," he automatically responded as he groaned to himself, his metal fingers brushing his tight locks in a disheveling manner. "I mean no! No, Yes?" he asked more so to himself, pulling a step back away from you like you were a fire to his destructive bomb.

The latter had been moving nonstop and it even got to the point of exerting his own push-ups in the middle of his bathroom; white shirt off as he threw it towards you in which you successfully caught in your hands. Bucky's body was built by Michaelangelo himself, he was sculpted to ruin you and probably also the hearts of his customers. Winter was sculpted by the heavens because of the beefy-ness he aspire to feed all the hungry lasses to which could include you in it. You admired the way his body works, how his bionic arm met his flesh body. In fact, it was amazing, though quite depressing because of what backstory it holds.

A backstory that you promise to yourself that you'll know.

He stopped mid-air while executing another set of push-ups, "I can help you--??" you gestured back at him as his Steele blue eyes stared at you with peculiarity before gazing down at your gesticulating hands that formed an 'O'; located in the middle part of you as you shifted it in a up and down manner. James Buchanan Barnes had no words to say at all, especially when you started to motion that certain hand of yours in the fore part of your opened mouth in a push and pull motion, "Or this could suffice? Will a blowjob suffice?" you garbled and continued to show him what you wanted to help him with.

It was as if his body weakened before him once he saw and understood what you meant. Winter didn't know what to do because he so wanted it to happen, he wanted it. Well, every man would. If you were just one of his clients, he would let that happen but it was you right now. You were the one asking for it, and those words coming from your lips seem to sound all too different.

Because James Buchanan Barnes had his heart involved in this one.

You weren't just one of his clients, you were more than that and he was sure of it. Steven Grant Rogers was even sure of it either.

Y/N was a person who was important him, she was as pure as a driven snow just by showing her his doting eyes whenever she sees him holding a bag full of food or those times whether she was being needy and just wanted to share her break time with him.

Though, today was an exception because he didn't expected her to become this much of a wild cat when drunk and Bucky Barnes damn knew well he wasn't complaining.

He so wanted that blowjob from his girl, and waiting for the right time was hurting his crotch and gentlemanly self.

"Or I could just help Steve instead?" you pondered more to yourself when you realized he wouldn't much take up the offer, he fell to the ground, mid air and face planked on the Vinyl tiles of his bathroom. You swayed your feet from above the sink, thoroughly guiltless with doe-like eyes when you saw him cursing the heavens for such a severe punishment for his sins.

"Well, It's not like Steve and I haven't actually done it?"

Hence, it was then and there that James Buchanan Barnes whom goes by the code name 'winter' and is also the highly requested gigolo of Felicity Night, in addition; a best friend of a very patriotic gigolo who could harm nobody started cursing Steven Grant Rogers for lying in front of his face.

What a best friend indeed, he was.

FEEDBACKS ARE VERY MUCH APPRECIATED, TATER TOTS! Please leave feedbacks if you’re loving this fanfic of mine! Follow my blog to see more of my works and we shall fangirl/fanboy about SEBASTIAN STAN! 

[weekendwarriorblog]

WHAT TO WATCH THIS WEEKEND 8/24/18 – The Happytime Murders, A-X-L and More

Over the 17 years I’ve been writing about box office, we always get to the 2ndhalf of August, and I feel the need to mention something called “The Dog Days of Summer.” This year, it’s quite literal with movies like Dog Days, Alpha, next week’s Pick of the Litter (a great doc!) and this week’s A-X-L, which is basically a robot dog movie. If nothing else, the summer will end with a Melissa McCarthy comedy, just like it started with a Melissa McCarthy comedy, and maybe this one will avoid the late August curse… or not.

THE HAPPYTIME MURDERS (STXfilms)

First up is McCarthy’s latest comedy which pairs her with Brian Henson of The Henson Company (of Muppets fame) in the type of raunchy R-rated comedy in which she thrives, but which is fairly new territory for the Hensons. It’s a buddy cop comedy where McCarthy is paired with the world’s first (and apparently worst) puppet policeman as they’re trying to find out who is killing the fabled TV personalities, the Happytime Gang.

While McCarthy is the featured human, the movie also stars Elizabeth Banks, Maya Rudolph and Joel McHale, all of whom have done their fair share of comedies, plus it has an obligatory appearance by MADtv’s Michael McDonald who seems to in every one of McCarthy’s movies. But really, the movie is mostly about the puppet characters who do drugs, have sex and swear a lot.

The Red Band trailer for The Happytime Murders has done fairly well online, so awareness of the movie should be in pretty good shape, but the primary audience for the movie will be the older high school and college-age guys who generally wouldn’t pay much interest to McCarthy or her films.

The two recent Muppets movies released by Disney aren’t great barometers for this film due to its R-rating. Maybe Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg’s Sausage Party from August 2012 might be a better comparison since that similarly twisted animation into a far-dirtier and more adult realm, although that movie’s $34.2 million opening was probably helped by the Sony marketing and how well its done with other films by Rogen/Goldberg. It doesn’t feel like Happytime Murders can open that well.

There’s also still the problem with STX deciding that the 2ndto last week of August is a good time to release a movie like this, and maybe there’s no good week to release it, because it’s so different. Because of this, I don’t expect reviews to be that great either. You can find them herewhenever they go live.

It just doesn’t seem likely that the movie will get enough traction to beat Crazy Rich Asians this weekend, so I’d expect it to end up somewhere in the $12 to 14 million range in second place.

Mini-Review: There’s something to be said about a comedy that barely gets snickers let alone full-on laughs, although you have to give Brian Henson, son of the late, great Jim Henson, credit for finding a fairly clever way into the buddy cop comedy we’ve seen so many times before. Detective Phil Phillips was the first puppet police officer on the force, but when he failed to save his partner Edwards (Melissa McCarthy) while she was being held by a puppet perp, he loses his badge. Going into practice as a private detective, he’s on a case, when he discovers that his actor brother and the cast of the kids’ show “The Happytime Gang” are being systematically murdered. Reteaming with Edwards, Phillips must find the killer who also has framed him for the murders, so that he’s being chased by the FBI (in the guise of Joel McHale, once again playing a jerk).

Where to begin with this movie that tries to put a more adult twist on the Muppets movies, except that it’s generally entertaining, if not particularly memorable or recommendable to everyone. In other words, it’s no Sausage Party.  Henson isn’t the best director in terms of getting the most out of the movie in terms of production value, but fortunately he has human stars like McCarthy, Rashida Jones and Elizabeth Banks who are able to bring more to a relatively flat script. The language and jokes are absolutely filthy, usually involving puppet sex and drugs, but it often feels like it’s constantly going for the lowest-hanging fruit for laugh.

Overall, The Happytime Murdersis an okay movie, although I doubt it will ever be considered a cult hit. I’m just glad more people who look like Kermit the Frog are finally being represented in Hollywood movies. Rating: 6.5/10

A-X-L (Global Road)

(No, that’s not an image from the movie above. Just thought you’d be interested to see what Axl Rose from Guns ‘n’ Roses looks like.)

I’m not sure I have very much to say about this movie, which is essentially a low-budget Transformers with a robot dog that also changes itself into a motorcycle. The movie is from Oliver Daly who previously has done a short, and it stars Thomas Jane, although he appears nowhere in the trailer that I remember. It also stars Ted McGinley and Lou Taylor Pucci, but we’re still not getting to a point where this would be anything more than a VOD release. The star of the film is Alex Neustaedter, who appeared on Colony and lots of other movies I haven’t seen. I just don’t see what the draw of this film is when it’s going up against other stronger family films. Opening in 1,695 theaters, A-X-L will probably end up somewhere in the $3 to 5 million range at the bottom of the top 10. (It certainly seems like Global Road may be facing bankruptcy soon, so this might be the final feature from another distributor that tried its best to make a difference.)

Basically, Crazy Rich Asians should be #1, and we should have a slight shake-up after that as last week’s #3 movie, Mark Wahlberg’s Mile 22, is likely to have a bigger drop-off than the well-received Alpha.

This week’s top 10 should look something like this…

1. Crazy Rich Asians  (New Line) - $17.5 million -30% 2. The Happytime Murders (STXfilms) - $12.4 million N/A 3. The Meg  (Warner Bros.) - $19.5 million -52% 4. Alpha (Sony) - $6.5 million -37% 5. Mile 22  (STXfilms) - $6.2 million -55% 6. Mission: Impossible – Fallout  (Paramount) - $6.0 millon -44% 7. Christopher Robin  (Disney) - $5.4 million -40% 8. BlacKkKlansman  (Focus Features) - $4.8 million -35% 9. A-X-L (Global Road) - $3.3 million N/A 10. Slender Man  (Screen Gems) - $2.1 million -56%

LIMITED RELEASES

There are lots and lots of specialty releases this weekend, bu tI want to give special attention to a thriller called SEARCHING (Screen Gems), which opens in limited release this weekend and will expand nationwide next week over Labor Day. It’s the feature film directorial debut of Aneesh Chaganty, and it stars John Cho (Star Trek) as a father whose daughter has disappeared, and like Unfriended: Dark Web, the entire story is told on a laptop screen, but this one is really good and one of my favorites from Sundance. I hope that people check this one out when it opens because I think it’s an amazing star turn for Cho, who actually has been great in everything he’s done going back to Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle, and it’s interesting to see how Chaganty uses technology to tell this story. (Mark my words, he will be a filmmaker to keep an eye on in the future.)

Another film worth noting is SUPPORT THE GIRLS (Magnolia), the new film from Computer Chess director Andrew Bujalski, this one starring Regina Hall as Lisa Conroy, the manager of a sports bar called Double Whammies, who is trying to balance all of the drama between the mostly female staff and mostly male customers, as things build up to a big boxing match that will only air if they can get the cable fixed. This is another fun film from Bujalski, definitely more modern and even more accessible than some of his previous films. Hall is terrific in the film and there are a lot of fun characters who interact as the film goes on. I was particularly impressed with Haley Lu Richardson (Split) who was almost unrecognizable as the restaurant’s bubbly star server. After premiering at the SXSW Film Festival in March, Bujalski’s latest is opening in a lot of theaters across the country including a number of Alamo Drafthouse theaters, so check out where it will play on the official site.

Another movie that is finally being released almost a year after it debuted at the Toronto International Film Festival (TIFF) is Michael Noer’s remake of PAPILLON (Bleecker Street), based on the books by Parisian safecracker Henri Charrière, as played by Charlie Hunnam, as he’s framed for murder and jailed on Devil’s Island. There, he forms an alliance with counterfeiter, Louis Dega, as played by Rami Malek of Mr. Robot, as the two plot an escape. (And MoviePass users, Bleecker Street has partnered with MoviePass so you can use it to see Papillon all weekend!)

Sam Rockwell and Ben Schwartz star in Hadi Hajaig’s BLUE IGUANA (Screen Media Films)as small-time New York crooks who are hired by a cute London lawyer (Phoebe Fox from Black Mirror) to fly to England and steal a rare jewel that another gangster wants for himself. New York, L.A. and a bunch of other theaters plus On Demand.

Emily Mortimer, Patricia Clarkson and Bill Nighy star in Isabel (Elegy, Learning to Drive) Coixet’s new movie THE BOOKSHOP (Greenwich). Set in 1959 England, Mortimer plays Florence Green, who is opening a book store in a small coastal town, getting the support from a reclusive widower (Nighy) while facing the local grand Dame (Clarkson). After sneaking into a few film festivals (like Berlin), The Bookshop will open in New York at the Landmark 57 (which takes MoviePass!) and Angelika Film Center as well as in L.A., plus it will be in more theaters on August 31.

If you’re into the weirdest anime possible then you’re probably already familiar with Massaki Yuasa from his previous films Mind Game and Lu on the Wall). His latest film THE NIGHT IS SHORT, WALK ON GIRL (GKIDS) might be his weirdest movie yet, and Fathom Events is screening it tonight, plus it will be playing at the Metrograph for a week (or more). It takes place in the course of a night as a mysterious high school girl walks through the streets of Kyoto’s Ponto-Cho party district drinking a LOT while interacting with all sorts of strange (and perverted) men. This one is as crazy and fun as Mind Game.

As far as some of this week’s docs, there’s the self-explanatory John McEnroe: In the Realm of Perfection (Oscilloscope) from director Julien Faraut, opening in L.A. at four theaters including the Royal and Laemmle’s Playhouse. Narrated by Mathieu Amalric, it assembles rare 16mm footage of McEnroe as he competes at the French Open in 1984.

Opening at the IFC Center in New York is Stephen Maing’s Crime + Punishment (IFC Films / Hulu), winner of a Special Jury Prize for “Social Impact,” as the filmmaker spent years with minority cops looking at the web of injustice which is hurting communities of color. Exec-produced by Laura Poitras (CitizenFour), it will open Friday with a preview screening tonight and QnAs with Maing and the NYP12.

The Quad Cinema will premiere Gail Freedman’s Hot to Trot, which won the Audience Award at this year’s NewFest with its look at same sex ballroom dancing. (Freedman and some of the subjects will be on hand on Friday/Saturday at 7:05pm for QnAs.)

What Keeps You Alive (IFC Midnight), the new film from Colin Minihan (It Stains the Sands Red), reunites him with Brittany Allen who plays Jules, one-half of a lesbian couple (with Hannah Emily Anderson, Syfy’s The Purge TV series) celebrating their one-year anniversary at a cabin in the woods. When the latter starts showing a new dark side, Jules must fight for her life. It will open in select theaters (including the IFC Center) as well as On Demand.

Ross Boyask’s aptly-titled revenge thriller I Am Vengeance (Saban Films/Lionsgate) stars former WWE superstar Stu “Wade” Barrett as ex-soldier John Gold who sets off on a mission to discover who murdered his best friend.

Rosemarie DeWitt and Danny McBride star in Jonathan Watson’s Arizona (RLJE Films) with DeWitt playing a single mom and real estate agent trying to keep things together after the 2009 housing crisis, which gets worse when her disgruntled client (McBride) confronts her boss. Also starring Luke Wilson, Kaitlin Olson and David Alan Grier, it will open in select theaters and be available On Demand, on iTunes and then on Amazon Prime Video on August 28.

Let’s get to some retrospective stuff. The Metrograph in New York is kicking off an extensive Larry Clark Retrospective with the director of Kidsappearing in person for QnAs as well as the New York premiere of his latest film Marfa Girl 2(the sequel to Marfa Girl, if you didn’t guess). They will also be screening Sofia Bohdanowicz’s Maison du Bonheur about 77-year-old Julianne Ellam, who has lived in the same home in Montmartre, Paris telling stories and people’s horoscopes, all filmed in 16mm.

The Quad Cinema will probably top that with their all-day Planet of the Apes Marathon on Sunday. 30 bucks to see the original five movies!

IFC Center will be showing a week-long 50thanniversary edition of Roman Polanski’s Rosemary’s Baby and all weekend long, you can all see Ant-Man director Peyton Reed’s 2000 film Bring It On, starring Kirsten Dunst, Eliza Dushku, Gabrielle Union and Jesse Bradford.

(Don’t worry, L.A. peeps. I’m slowly my way to the far coast to share some of the repertory offerings there. Stay tuned!)

Don’t feel like going out? Netflix will premiere the first season of The Innocents (Netflix), Simon Duric and Hania Elkington’s new series starring Sorcha Groundsell and Percelle Ascott as two teenagers who run away to be together… oh, and she’s a shape-shifter, plus it also stars Guy Pearce.