#fiona writes sometimes

[zippiedippievippie]

TBOSAS Ao3 Masterlist

Inspired by Sawyer!! (Whose masterlist of amazing fics is available here!!)

These summaries are literally terrible forgive me

Seeds That Bleed

Treech and Lamina growing up together in District 7, spans across ten years

Enemies to friends to lovers type beat

Me inventing District Seven lore bc why not

Treemina warning 🚨 🚨 i am who i am 🤞

Egregiously long oneshot, 16.9k words

Coven In My Oven

The most painful fluffy oneshot to ever exist don’t read this

Treemina warning 🚨🚨

Treech thinks he bewitched his girlfriend into liking him with real witchcraft

Treech is a disaster and Lamina is wonderfully functional

Teeny tiny oneshot, 1.3k words

Ghost Lights On The Water

Because Treech, Coral, Reaper, Mizzen, and Wovey didn’t die in Reaper’s morgue, they become stuck in a brutal cycle of watching each year’s Hunger Games

References to the 74th and 75th Games

Inspired by this Tumblr ask

Oneshot, 8k words

Salt For All The Cuts

Treech is nearly blind. He was born with eyes that didn’t work, and yet he can always see red things

Basically Treech’s struggles with his faulty eyes and the way he gets through life from birth through the Games

Treemina be warned

Oneshot, 3k words

Where Your Eyes Naturally Drift

Treech, Lamina, and the stark differences in their upbringings, ideal, psyches

“Treech came into the world with his eyes pointed towards the sky while Lamina was born with her face in the dirt.”

Parallels galore

Treemina be warned

Oneshot, 4k words

Til Death Do Us Part

A deep dive into the harsh atmosphere of the Capitol’s Academy and all the varying perspectives on the morals of the Hunger Games told from a place of privilege

Character study/my interpretation of each mentor from the Tenth Hunger Games

Current mentor list: Juno Phipps, Iphigenia Moss, Vipsania Sickle, Persephone Price, Pup Harrington, Domitia Whimsiwick, Festus Creed

Multi-chapter, currently at 73k words

Big Brawls And Yule Balls

Treech and Lamina are childhood friends turned strangers who reunite at the Yule Ball

Harry Potter AU!!

Treech leaves this fic with a crush methinks

Part 2 will eventually be published we’ll see heehee

Oneshot, 5k words

Two Vines Entwined

Treech and Lamina’s journey from the Reaping through the Tenth Hunger Games

Primarily Treech and Lamina friendship with the tiniest bit of romantic undertones if you squint

My first tbosas fic so it’s kinda bad 🫣

Long oneshot, 13k words

[chasindbae]

"Love, where the colors, the shapes of you, bleed into me - I am made blue Where red flows free In this world, some people are like lights As some are the moths drawn to them in night"

[renegadeontherunn]

wordle 9/10

here’s 9/3 & 9/9!

wish my pain was as pretty as a glittering pearl

could be plucked like a petal, blown away in the breeze

i’d be scared to see it go, cause who would i be then?

too afraid of the cure, rather die from disease

wolves running feral, beneath the full moon

i’ll be the moss on an oak, cause i’m running too

make me a smooth stone, slowly carved by a stream

my body’s storm clouds & snow, oh can’t a girl dream?

i want to rebel

promise me you’ll never tell

they all have expectations

easier to stay locked in my cell

[scumbag-the-hedgehog]

"Gender fluid? I got your gender fluid right here!"

"Oh, there's my estradiol! Thanks babe."

[thestarlightforge]

Fiona’s Art Journal 2024

12/31/2023

***

Gonna journal my New Year’s Resolution on here, do it with y’all.

In 2024, I will do something for my art/artistry every day.

Whether that’s writing, drawing, reading, watching/studying, exploring/adventuring, or listening to something.

Sometimes it will overlap with work because I’ve found work that allows me to be an artist, and that’s wonderful. But each day, I will do something artistic that’s not just for capitalistic outcomes.

One thing for my art, daily. And I will document it here. ☺️

[martzyink]

🍂🖤.

This is a very random spread but enjoy the doodles and the dorky paragraphs I’m about to write rambling about what the heck was going on in my brain while drawing this.💀🙏🏻

Let’s be honest, Mickey LOVES the fact that Ian’s been in the military. Absolutely loves his rib tattoo and is OBSESSED with Ian in a military/army uniform. Also I just wanted an excuse to draw my season 11 babies being silly and married.🧌✨

I had this vision of Ian (Season 1) letting Mickey “borrow* most of his clothes (or clothes he just happened to be wearing whenever they’d meet up. Sometimes Fiona’s, sometimes Lip’s) just because Mickey always seemed to be wearing the same scruffy old clothes and well, Ian felt bad but obviously he had to do it in a way where Mickey wouldn’t suspect that so he’d tell him “it’s fine, just give it back next time I see you” both knowing damn well Ian will never be seeing those clothes again. And Mickey agreed to it every time because free clothes?? Hell yeah. Ians scent? Nice. Really nice… ☺️✨

And god he needed new clothes bad.😬

(Btw there was a third drawing I decided to take down because no matter how much I looked at it, I wasn’t happy with it😭😭)

[flanaganfilm]

Dear Mike,

I'm writing my first novel, a horror story about giant cicadas that hypnotise people into moulting. It's a metaphor for drug addiction. In my opinion, horror is its best when it's also a commentary, or a reflection, on something real that afflicts society, like capitalism, xenophobia, or intergenerational trauma. I'm nearly 6 months clean, and though it wasn't my intention, this book is helping me come to terms with how bad things were, and how hard I had to work to get out of that life.

You tackle a lot of the toughest parts of the human experience in your work: loss and grief, mental illness, addiction, trauma, recovery... How do you write about those things without falling too deep into memories of what they felt like? My creative writing professor says there's no place for grief in horror, but I know she's dead wrong. My novice guess is that drawing from experience to make a character's trials feel more "real" makes their stories more immersive and empathetic. What do you think? Do you have any advice for how to emotionally detach for your characters, or how to balance grief and terror in a story?

Thank you, Fíona

Hi Fiona, First, a huge congratulations on 6 months. That's an amazing feat. Second, your creative writing professor is embarrassingly wrong when she says there is no place for grief in horror. That's so wrong, in fact, it should disqualify her from teaching creative writing. (Or, perhaps this is a rare creative writing teacher who simply hasn't been exposed to Charles Dickens, Henry James, Shirley Jackson, Edgar Allan Poe, or Stephen King. Ask her to go read Don't Look Now by Daphne du Maurier, and then explain that there's no place for grief in horror. What an embarrassing thing to say.)

I don't emotionally detach from my characters at all, far from it. When it comes to truly facing my own traumas, darkness, grief, shortcomings, fears, and insecurities, I have far more courage when I'm writing than I do in day-to-day life.

It can be tough to fall too deeply into the dark places, or the memories - there's at least some measure of safety to such expeditions when I'm writing. It can be similar to the kind of safety I find in therapy. Sometimes, a character scares me because I can't relate to them at all (Beverly Keane). Other times, characters are so close to my self that it's impossible to separate them in my mind (Riley Flynn). Drawing from experience is a brave and beautiful act, and infuses your fiction with authenticity, nuance, and humanity. Best of luck with your writing. And whatever you do, don't listen to that teacher. Apologies, but she's full of shit.

[felassan]

David Gaider on Alistair, under a cut for length:

"Ah, Alistair. Depending on who you ask, he's the adorable woobie with the biggest heart or the irritating, over-used man-child. Yes, he is indeed all of those things. Good characters have flaws to go with their virtues. Ugly spots. That is literally their humanity. He was a bit of a bear to write, at the outset. James (Ohlen, the first creative director on DAO) had this idea he needed to be a grizzled Warden veteran - older, distrusting. Everyone hated him instantly. I call this the Carth Onasi Problem, and suggested to James that maybe I try something else. My observation says that the characters who are generally liked the most are the supportive ones. Enthusiastic. Funny? Sometimes, sure, but that's *not* required. I need to digress. See, at the time James had this (regrettable) period where he believed everything could be derived from a formula. He even sold this idea to the founders, Ray and Greg. Google 'BioWare formula'. Anyway, how this relates is because James thought the DAO cast needed a Minsc: a comedy character who would become super popular and, ideally, the icon of DA. "Isn't that Alistair?" you ask. "Arguable," I say, "but no." James had me to up a huge list of 'comedic archetypes' and I wrote some possible dialogue for each one. Then he had the team vote. The winning archetype? The Buffoon - like Homer Simpson or Peter Griffin. James was pleased. I was not. "The problem," I said, "is I don't find the Buffoon funny." 😅"

""But you're a professional." "Sure, I *can* write him... but comedy isn't science. I need to find him funny. If I write him, the only comedy I'll mine is where he makes fun of himself." James took that on board and then passed the character onto someone else. The result? Oghren. I rest my case. So back to the supportive character: that was my thought for a new Alistair. It was a special case, after all - the DAO PC was thrust into a terrible situation. They needed someone who had their back. A bud. A *likeable* bud. I was watching Buffy at the time, and my thoughts drifted towards Xander. Now, I know Joss Whedon is persona non grata these days, but this was 2006, OK? I was watching Buffy and thought, "man, Xander is such a wasted character" and considered how to fix him. Then I realized this might work for Alistair. Plus, I wanted to see if I could replicate the Whedon vocal patter. That was the new Alistair: a more useful and likeable yet equally dorky version of Xander. We had very strict rules in DA about language: no modern speech styles, colloquialisms, any words that came into use in our world after 1900 got severe side eye... but Alistair? Alistair got a blanket pass. Was it great that the lead writer's leading man got to break the rules? I guess not, but it's my opinion that you can break those kinds of rules - selectively, in small doses. Too much and you break the illusion. And it worked. Alistair was an instant hit. Not just with the team, but with the fans."

"Confession time? Yes, I knew Goldanna wasn't meant to be Alistair's mother. But neither was Fiona, originally. I think fans caught wind of some revisionism at work, and OK it's true. I had a more Arthurian idea for his birth but I stopped liking it... yet not soon enough to go back and make edits. Should I have just left it be, left Goldanna as his mother? Maybe. It was one of those writer things I just couldn't let go of and I probably could have used someone to sit me down and go "Gaider, please. Just stop." I still like Fiona, and where I took it. But I probably shouldn't have gone there. Casting Alistair was SUCH a chore. He required a weird mix of devilish charm, but with enough sincerity and adorkableness it didn't come off as smarmy. Every audition went full smarm... until Steve Valentine up and appeared out of nowhere. In the midst of a batch of audition files, there he was. We brought Steve in "just to try out", and he pulled it off. Even the "frog time" line, which (seriously) nobody else could. And when he got to the romantic lines, Steve's voice turned into pure butter without, again, sliding into "oh, he's slightly creepy". Both Caroline and I were sold. And he was so gloriously easy to write. It's a well I'd probably return to... a bit too often, maybe? Maric, then Anders in Awakening, and then Alistair kept popping up in future games and the comics because, yes, he was pretty much the breakout comedy character of DA. Which still makes me happy. 😁 CORRECTION: Goldanna was someone Alistair thought was his *sister*, and her mother his mother. Look, it was almost twenty years ago, OK? 😅 --- I actually had a whole scene written in DAI where Fiona tells him, but the requirements were so specific for them both to be in Skyhold and it seemed like it'd be relevant only to a small small sub-section of fans (and confusing to everyone else) so it was dropped. Rightfully so, I guess."

[source thread]

User: "The Buffy vibes were strong in DAO and I was very happy with that at the time. What I loved about DAO was the mix of dark themes entwined with bits of levity. That's how I like my angst. Dark, broody with a side of ha-has and y'all delivered in DAO for sure." David Gaider: "That's a me thing. I like going dark - really dark - and then pairing it with light, comedic moments. It provides peaks and valleys in the tone, and prevents either from becoming overwhelming. Hey if it worked for Shakespeare (alas, poor Yorrick), it can work for DA, right? 😉" [source]

[fionaapplerocks]

“I sometimes think that I must time-travel and I don’t remember it,” Apple says, when I ask her what she does with all the time she spends not working. “Like, I must be off climbing a mountain in a parallel universe. I can’t remember writing any of the songs that I’ve written. I don’t know what the hell I do with myself. I feel like I’m 100 years old. I can’t tell you what I did today. I can’t tell you what I did for seven years. I can’t tell you. It happens so seamlessly — I’m just floating along and seven years go by.” – Fiona Apple Spin interview May 31st 2012

[pureastrologywisdom]

𝔄𝔰𝔱𝔯𝔬 𝔬𝔟𝔰𝔢𝔯𝔳𝔞𝔱𝔦𝔬𝔫𝔰

If you have any placements in virgo, WRITE THINGS DOWN. You are influenced by mercury as Virgo's planetary ruler, however you are also an earth sign. You cannot handle that fast paced energy of Mercury as well as gemini. You need to lament on things decisions/ideas a little longer. You prefer to take your time. instead of having those thoughts bouncing around your head, calm yourself by getting them on paper. You also naturally have an ability for writing.

Having your moon in the 11th house is such an underrated placement. The 11th house is one of the houses that is about people as a collective. Having your moon here you have a really easy time connecting with people, people will regard you as genuine and comforting. Along with this the 11th house is also the house of gains. This shows that often people will their moon here find gains through their emotions, whether that be success, recognition for their work, or becoming known for this. I have seen this in a lot of creative peoples charts, or people who have been known for their emotional displays in some form. For example, Billie Ellish, Oprah Winfrey, Elizabeth Taylor, Martin Luther King, Fiona Apple, Ryan Gosling. There is a skill here of really being able to connect with a mass of people or the collective.

Neptune in the 3rd house is a placement that I don't hear spoken about too often. But it's one of my favourites. These people Can be soft spoken and have a beautiful voice, spoken and sometimes signing also. Along with this they are incredibly enchanting hone they speak, there is something captivating about how they communicate. People will hang on their every word. Neptune is the higher octave of Venus which gives these people a way with their words, very creative. These people are often signers or poets or simply incredibly good at inciting emotions when they speak. There is almost something magical, as if they are casting a spell in a way. Its vulnerable, seductive and dreamy energy.

An aspect I like to see in a birth chart is a Quincunx. Whilst this might seem like a funny thing to say, considering that this aspect can be a difficult energy to harmonise, I actually enjoy the juxtaposition it brings to a person. It gives someone a quality that, at first glance or even when getting to know them, is quite unexpected. A little surprise. Something that takes people back, some nuance. I makes someone interesting and sometimes even misunderstood. As mentioned it can even be hard for these people themselves to undertones these opposite sides/needs within themselves.

Thank you for reading all,

Pureastrowisdom x

P.S.

Chart reading not available, I have around 5 spaces left for this month

Dm me if you are interested in...

Big three reading - £6

~ a good intro to astrology and exploring your chart

Self connection reading - £20

~ a deeper understanding of your chart. I use your chart as medium for you to have a deeper connection with yourself, focusing on self love, self worth and self appreciation

[zippiedippievippie]

For anyone looking for some Lamina/Treech content after watching tbosas movie!!

[0-n-1-x]

Hellooo! Could you write something about carl gallagher dating a girl who has a protective older brother like mickey milkovich ??? Thanks ✨

Carl Gallagher x Protective Older Brother!Reader

link to my masterlist <33

The first time Carl meets your older brother, the tension is palpable. Your brother, much like Mickey, is rough around the edges, fiercely protective, and not easily impressed. He sizes Carl up immediately, making it clear that he’ll be watching every move Carl makes.

Your brother makes it his mission to keep a close eye on Carl, showing up unexpectedly or making pointed comments about how Carl should treat you. He’s always hovering in the background, ready to step in if he feels Carl is out of line. Which you appreciate, and you know its out of love, but its annoying most of the time

Carl understands where your brother is coming from and, instead of being intimidated, he sees it as a challenge. He goes out of his way to show that he’s serious about you, whether it’s through his actions or how he treats you when your brother is around. Over time, he starts to earn your brother’s respect. He's definitely like that with Debbie's flings and sometimes Fiona, so he understands the protectiveness (even if he does NOT have the same effect on their partners)

With your brother constantly watching, you and Carl find yourselves sneaking around to get some alone time. The secrecy adds an extra layer of excitement to your relationship. Whether it’s a (not-so-quick) kiss behind closed doors or a whispered conversation in the shadows, every stolen moment feels charged with adrenaline.

Carl often sneaks over to your place late at night, long after your brother has gone to bed. You both get a thrill out of the risk, knowing that getting caught could lead to a serious confrontation. These late-night visits are filled with quiet laughter, soft whispers, and the intimacy of being together when no one else is around.

But best believe he's jumping the fence when your brother comes chasing with a bat

You and Carl become experts at crafting believable alibis. If your brother asks where you’ve been or what you’ve been doing, you’re always ready with a story that keeps suspicion at bay. Carl is unsurprisingly good at coming up with quick excuses

To avoid raising suspicion, you and Carl would probably develop a system for texting each other in code. Simple phrases or emojis take on new meanings, allowing you to communicate plans without giving anything away if your brother happens to glance at your phone. It’s a fun, secret language that only the two of you understand. Though Carl forgets every other time and you have to rework the whole system

[synced-love]

Astrology and Creativity - P1

For the signs, look at you Sun, Moon, Venus, Mercury, and 5th house.

Pisces Mercury is not placement which means you'll be dumb but it can signify a disconnect with traditional learning styles. it also makes you super creative, a good sing, and a super good writer. I've also found a lot of Pisces don't like the actual action of writing but they still like to write.

The Venus signs plus Pisces make someone a very creative and stylish person. people with Taurus and Pisces placements are real singers or rappers. Pisces and Libra placements are very good with clothes, fashion, and writing. think of Doja Cat, Tyler the Creator, Rihanna, and Taeyeon.

Mercurial signs are THE BEST writers. Gemini are more like rappers and writers who make fantasy and things like that and Virgos are more like journalists and make more factual things but they are still able to spit bars and make new things especially if they have a Venusian sign in their chart. Kendrick Lamar is a Gemini Sun, Venus, and Chiron, Eminem is a Libra Sun Virgo Venus, and Fiona Apple is a Virgo Sun, Moon, and Mercury.

Libras are very flexible and can do some many different concepts. especially if they have Scorpio placements. their so pretty, their voices are pretty. sometimes I hate being a Virgo stellium because why couldn't it have been Libra.

Also, Libras, Tauruses, and Virgos make the best R&B music, I don't make the rules.

If you don't have these placements, it doesn't mean your not creative but these are just signs that have extra help in their creativity, and its easier for them to express it. Bye bye!!!

[thearttolifesdistractions]

i know

description: when you're with him, love feels like something fleeting. you act like you belong to each other, like it's official, but refuse to make it real. you tell yourself you’re okay with it, you always do. but when his phone buzzes, when you know it’s her, the weight of being his secret becomes hard. and still, when it’s time to leave, you don’t ask him to choose. because you already know he won’t. and maybe this situation won't grow as you hoped, but maybe that's okay.

warnings: mid writing, friends with benefits (ofc... my fav trope), mentions of nsfw but nothing explicit, angst but not really, not the best ending......

a/n: HELLO!!! crazy that you guys get two posts this week wooooahhhh…. anyways! so i wrote this after listening to 'i know' by fiona apple & i was convinced i was gonna make this a multiple part fic! buuut after writing this part i couldn't figure where to go from here 😭 well! maybe i'll make some more parts later if i can like…. figure out a plot but i figured why not post it anyways since i think it's alright as a standalone… enjoy!

wc: 3,127

paring: hozier x fem!reader

⋆⁺₊⋆ ━━━━━━━━━━━⊱༒︎ • ༒︎⊰━━━━━━━━━━━ ⋆⁺₊⋆

The lavish, and entirely too expensive, room he’s booked is gorgeous. A five-star hotel in the City of Lights that makes your apartment back home look trivial, and that was quite expensive too. You’re curled up on the bed, body wrapped in the softest robe you’ve ever felt, watching as Andrew thumbs through a book, but his mind is clearly preoccupied, flicking from page to page without ever really focusing on the words. 

He’s on tour right now, though somehow, he had it scheduled to have an entire week free in Paris, and it just happened to align with your schedule as well. The second you both found out you were free during the same week, you flew out to see him. But even now, in the most romantic city in the world, you can’t help but feel like you’re living in a lie, or a moment that neither of you really has any claim to. His distracted gaze keeps flickering to his phone on the nightstand, as though waiting for something. Or someone.

The thought of her has your stomach burning, with both anger and disappointment. He’s not technically dating her, but he keeps up the image to ‘keep the press out of his love life.’ You were supposed to be something real, something beyond whatever this is, but you’re starting to realize you’ll never be anything more than the girl that keeps his bed warm. 

He doesn’t even know what that does to you, the way she’s always there, lingering in the background of every conversation. The way you always spend the last moments together wondering what he's going to do with her. He always has something planned with her after you’ve spent time together, claiming that it helps maintain the illusion that you two are just friends. He says no one will care about photos of the two of you having ‘friendly’ hangouts if he’s still going on dates with her.

It’s the last day before he’s back on tour. The last day before you go back home. It shouldn’t hurt this much. This is what always happens. You both have a brief window of time that lines up, and you meet up, privately playing the perfect couple, then going back to being friends until the cycle repeats. In the times where you both took breaks from releasing music, these moments lasted longer, sometimes months. It was hard to say goodbye then, especially after you'd forgotten how to be without him. So, it should be easier to say goodbye after just a week, right? But, he just makes it so damn hard.

You sigh quietly, the sound barely escaping your lips as you adjust to lay your head in his lap. Maybe being physically closer to him can bridge the gap, maybe it can help you convince yourself that this is normal. 

His hand immediately moves to comb through your hair, fingers scratching at your scalp in a way that has your eyelids fluttering. You look at him now, meeting his gaze as he stares at you with a soft smile, and for a moment, you wish you could just ask him. Ask him what this is, what you are to him. But you know that won’t change anything. He’d probably just smile, brush it off, and go back to doing whatever it is he does. You can’t blame him for that. It’s hard being in the spotlight, knowing that everyone is scrutinizing your every move. It’s one of the first things you two bonded over.

Your mind races back to those early days, when you first met him a few years ago, working on a song together. It started as something completely professional, both of you working at the same label and they’d decided that a collab between the two of you would work well. You were both doing your part, helping each other out with a track that you’d been assigned to create. But somewhere during the late nights in the studio, they turned into late nights talks that turned into something else. You couldn’t have predicted how quickly the chemistry between you would go from creative to something more.

It was easy to grow feelings for him, almost natural. You had never really talked about what you were to each other, you just were. And it was nice. The understanding that whatever it was, it didn’t need to be defined. You think about those first days, the way he smiled when he looked at you, the subtle touches. And how, over time, it was like your lives just fit with each other’s. 

The media had no idea, so they just called you "good friends," a convenient label that kept the press off your backs. It worked, until it didn’t. Of course, rumors and speculation grew about the nature of your connection: friends or something more? It wasn’t something you were worried about, understanding that whatever they said didn’t change the fact that while you were more than friends, you were still less than official. It didn’t bother you half as much as it had bothered him. 

At the start of the rumors, he had opened up to you about his last public relationship. How she had received so much hate that she couldn’t handle it anymore, ending things with him in order to protect herself. How much it hurt him to watch someone he cared about so much go through so much pain because of his lifestyle. And she wasn’t even famous. He told you, then, about his fear of things getting out of hand with you. Since you both live in the limelight, how much worse it could be. You didn’t know it then, but that was his way of telling you that he wouldn’t be willing to take the risk to be with you fully.

It was at the height of the rumors that he had told you about her. Claiming that it was common amongst celebrities, saying that this “pr relationship” would be beneficial for both you and him, keeping the media out of whatever you two had going on. The way he had explained it, as a way to keep you private, at first, felt like a way of saying he didn’t want the innocence of your relationship situation being ruined by the harsh words of those who couldn’t keep their opinions to themselves. He told you that he didn’t want the two of you to rush into putting a label on things, only for it to get torn apart by the public eye. Now, you see that he really just wants to have you without the responsibility of defending you, you’re not worth the effort. 

Regardless, you thought that it would be over quick. That he’d tell you he’s ready to make it official, let the media know he’s ended things with her, and continue keeping your relationship private but not secret. Of course, you were wrong. But, what did you expect? You never said it out loud, never set any expectations with him. Why would he go through the effort of ending something that requires so little from him for something that might be too much to handle?

His phone buzzes again, interrupting your thoughts, and your heart squeezes painfully in your chest. Another distraction. Another reminder that you’ll never really be his priority. He gives you everything he can, and it’s always just enough to keep you hooked. Not too much, not too little. And that’s all it will ever be.

He spares his phone a quick glance, and you relish in the way he tosses it to the nightstand and brings his attention back to you. “Are you alright?” He asks, finally, his voice soft, breaking through the silence. He doesn’t know what’s going on in your head. He can’t, not unless you say it. But you won’t. Not when the end of this reality is already in sight.

“I’m fine,” you say, your voice a little too steady. His eyes narrow at you, eyebrows raising. He knows you well enough to see right through the lie, but he also knows you well enough to know that you don’t want to talk about it. He doesn’t push, just gives you a look that says everything. That he sees right through you, but he’ll let you hold onto your silence a little longer. He doesn’t argue, doesn’t try to force the words out of you. He knows better by now.

For a moment, you both just sit there, the silence between you two comfortable. You never feel awkward with Andrew. You try to distract yourself, trying to focus on the way his hand moves gently through your hair. His touch is soft and intimate, but it doesn’t reach you the way it used to. Now, it acts as a reminder of everything that’s always just out of reach. A reminder of what could be, but never will. His gaze flickers down to you, and there’s that smile again. That soft, lazy smile that’s always just enough to make your heart skip and make you forget every bit of pain and self-doubt he’s caused. 

“You know, this week was... nice,” you say, the words slipping out before you can stop them. What an understatement. You want to say that this week was exactly what you needed, that spending time being intimate with him is the greatest comfort you know. That you want nothing but to spend every second with him, that nothing compares to the way he makes you feel. But, you’ll leave it at ‘nice.’

His smile grows as he nods, a knowing look in his eyes. He’s not oblivious of your inner turmoil, but he’ll respect your wishes to move past it. “Yeah,” he says softly, his thumb now brushing across your cheek. “It was nice. It’s always nice to be alone with you”

You wish he would have the courage to say what you wanted to. To admit that this time spent together is more than just nice, that it’s everything. The thought of him finally admitting what you both know flashes through your mind before you can stop it. But of course, he doesn’t say that. He never does. He’s always so close, just a few words away, but he’s never given you more. That might be your fault, you’ve never really asked for more than he’s willing to give. The truth is, you’re afraid to. 

And not because you think he doesn’t feel the same, you know he does. You know he loves you, at least to some extent. You feel it in the way he holds you, the way his touch is always gentle, even in the most intimate moments. You feel it in the way he listens when you talk, how he’s present with you in those quiet spaces between the noise of the world. He makes you feel like you're the only one in the room, like nothing else matters when you’re around. His love is there, you know it, you feel it in every moment you share. But his fear might just outgrow it.

The thought creeps into your mind, and for the first time, it doesn’t sting as much as it used to. Maybe because you’re starting to accept that the love you share with him, as real as it is, will never be enough to make him choose you over his fear of the public, the press, everything that comes with being with someone like you.

His phone buzzes against the nightstand, and you know it’s her. You can feel it in the way his body tenses, the way his attention flickers. For a moment, you want to reach out, take the phone, and throw it out the window. But you won’t. Because that’s not you, you’ve got a better grip on your emotions. Andrew sighs softly, his eyes glancing at his phone but not picking it up. He looks back at you, the silence stretching longer now. You know he’s trying to figure out what to say, how to ease the troubles in your mind without actually knowing them.

He knows you’re tired. Tired of pretending. Tired of being the girl that no one knows about. You wish you could ask him what it would take for him to just choose you. But you don’t, because asking for that would mean acknowledging what’s never going to happen. And if you acknowledge it, the end will be real. Instead, you shift in his lap, trying to find some comfort in the closeness, and it isn’t working as well as usual. His hand lingers on your cheek, the touch warm, but not soothing the coldness you feel inside.

“Tomorrow’s the day,” you say softly, the words heavier than you expected. It’s the end of your time together. The last moment of this unending season of your life. Tomorrow. you both hit pause until the next time. “You’ll go back to the tour, and I’ll go back to everything else.”

He’s quiet for a moment, eyes still focused on yours. “Yeah,” he finally says, voice soft but distant. “I guess we don’t have a choice.” You nod, the lump in your throat growing as you tilt head away, unable to look at him. You want to scream at him that you do have a choice. That he could ask you to stay, ask you to finally do him the favour of being his. That there is another option, he just has to say it. 

“I know we don’t,” you whisper, your voice barely audible. “But I wish we did.”

He sighs, eyes softening, his hand gently lifting your chin to meet his gaze. “I wish we did too. I wish I could give you what you need.” His voice is low, tinged with regret, and it makes your chest tighten in a way that hurts. 

It’s the closest you’ve ever come to talking about it, and it was barely anything. And for a brief moment, you think maybe there could be more. But the moment passes quickly, fading into that familiar silence between you two. He doesn’t press for more, and neither do you.

You sit up slowly, lifting your head from his lap, ignoring his confused look as you shake his hand from your face. His expression changes as you shift, legs settling to straddle him, lowering yourself on his lap as you rest your head against his chest. You close your eyes as he wraps his arms around you, relishing in his warmth, listening to his heartbeat, and begging for the ache to stop.

Andrew lets out a quick sigh, breaking your focus on his pulse. “So, how’s the new album coming along?” he asks, and you can hear the playful undertone.

You look up at him, seeing the mischief in his eyes. “It’s coming along,” you reply, trying your hardest to match his new mood. “You know, the usual. The pressure of getting it right, the expectations, the deadlines.”

He raises an eyebrow, leaning back slightly to get a better look at your face. “Oh, yeah? Any songs about me?” His grin widens as he teases, the atmosphere going back to something just as familiar. You can tell he’s just trying to lighten the mood, and the effort warms your heart.

You laugh softly, the sound escaping before you can stop it. It’s like a breath of relief after the worries in your troubled mind. You sit up straighter, locking eyes with him, and you can’t hide the honesty in your tone despite your teasing smirk. “They’re all about you, Andy. They always are.”

His smile falls for a second, like that’s not what he was expecting you to say, which he probably wasn’t. Before you have a chance to clarify, he’s leaning in. 

His lips capture yours in a kiss that’s too gentle for how much you both need it. It deepens quickly, the emotional tension feeling almost exactly like sexual. His hands slip around your waist, pulling you closer as your fingers pull at the hair on the nape of his neck.

You can’t help but give into him, the way his lips move against yours with the perfect mix of gentleness and desire. He kisses you like he’s always wanted this, and you think that maybe you have too. The thought of everything that you want to say but you can’t becomes a distant memory as his hands squeeze at your waist, pulling you impossibly closer.

It doesn’t stay slow for long. The heat builds between you as his touch grows more urgent, more desperate. You can feel it in the way he moves, in the way his breath hitches when you tug a bit harder at his hair. You move your hands to roam over his body, exploring every inch of him. You trace the outline of his frame, the curves of his shoulders, and the defined muscles of his arms. Your hands are eager, and his hands match yours, caressing your body with a softness that has you trembling.

As the kiss deepens, his tongue teases your lips, asking for entry. You part your mouth immediately, inviting him in, and letting your tongues mix together. The taste of him is addicting, something you could never get tired of. His mouth leaves yours as he trails kisses down your neck, stopping briefly to suck at that spot just below your ear that has your back arching into him.

His hands move lower, his fingers trailing down your sides, pausing at the waistband of your silk pajama shorts. His warm touch is calming to your soul, but overwhelming to your body. He pulls his mouth from your neck and rests his forehead against yours, both of you huffing and sharing breath. Your eyes flutter open and you meet his darkened gaze, before you can speak, ask him why he stopped, he beats you to it.

“Whatever’s got you tangled up inside, let it go,” he whispers, his words slow and soft, but deliberate. “Let me take the weight off of you, love. Please.” His voice is whiny, borderline pleading. It makes your heart flutter, not just because of the softness in his words, but because he wants to take care of you. He’s offering himself, wanting to give you a release. And it’s real.

It reminds you that he’s here, now. As fully as he can be with you, and for the first time, you feel like maybe you’re both letting go of all the things that separate you. The world, the expectations, and the fear. It all slips away just for this moment. 

And maybe this is the realest you’ll get with him, but maybe that’s enough for now.

[lov3-lik3-ghosts]

Can you make a enoch x fem!reader where they liked each other for a while and he finds readers diary and reads infront of the others (i think you know where this is going)

I Bite

Pairing: Enoch O’Connor x fem!reader.

Warnings: Not beta nor proofread.

Word Count: 615.

Authors note: This didn’t go exactly as I’d planned so please let me know if you’d like me to give this another try. I had so much fun writing this one.

| mother m-list

Enoch’s bitter wind to rainy days, blistering at your skin and billowing you back. He bites the hand that feeds him, he snarls at a step too close. He’s mean, a rabid lone-wolf lunging at any sign of life with his maw agape. No remorse, no mercy.

You don’t know why you like him. There’s journal upon journal stacked along your bookcase with entries of everything wrong he does, of every attack he spiels your way. There are no milestones between you, no sniff of the offering hand and somehow, still, you can’t repent.

You can’t.

And yet you must.

Because this, how he stares at you — empty and lifeless and cold, like an ice frozen god stuck with the mistake of disciples, like your vermin — while he listens to all you are and all you have been is shattering any resilience you had left.

Two entries out of thousands and Jake doesn’t stop reading. You think maybe he doesn’t realise whose they are and neither do the others who sit swooning over such romance. But Enoch does. He knows and he doesn’t like it.

And he bites.

Hard.

“-defense mechanism. Like if he only ever gives away his bad parts no one can expect him to be good. No one can be disappointed if he doesn’t live up to their expectations. He can’t be disappointed.” Jacob takes a breath. “But I know better. I know he’s good, that he cares. I know he tries, in his own way. However twisted. I see him. I’ve always seen him. I sometimes wonder if he’ll ever see me too.”

Bronwyn hushes the giggles of Fiona and Claire to stare intently at Jake. You can only listen as he begins the next entry, confined within your own horror.

“September 3rd, 1940.” An inside joke you hold with yourself, as though everyday wasn’t virtually the same.

“He’s changed. I’ve forgotten how different he used to be, how much he used to care. I think it’s because it was gradual and not just ripped from me. Victor-” He inhales. They all do — as though they’ve only just realised that this belonged to someone in the loop, someone here.

Jake continues. “Victor's passing was different. It was sudden, yes but it was so sudden that I had no choice but to notice. Grief blinded my perception for a while and overtook him in both our vulnerability. Enoch changed after Abe but even more so after Victor.”

Your gaze drops to the gravel at his name.

“Wait, this is about Enoch?” Olive pipes and you’re surprised she’s not realised sooner.

Emma’s lead boots clink as she sits beside Jake. “Who else?” She says, as though it were obvious.

You imagine Enoch squirming under their scrutiny, tensing and rearing and ready to strike. You hear his barely audible breath before words and you know you’re right.

“Who cares.” He spits with a tongue like venom. “I don’t need anyone’s pity or sympathy. I don’t need some analysis to write pity stories about emotions they’ve decided I feel.”

Somewhere along his speech you lift your head and meet his acorn eyes, storming with winds of spite.

Claire cuts him off with her honeypot voice. “But Enoch, it’s so romantic!”

He scoffs. “And I certainly don’t need some love-stricken, delusional fool to see me.”

It shouldn’t hurt as hard as it does, rippling beneath your ribcage, not when you knew this would be his reaction. Not when you knew him at all.

Enoch strides briskly out of the gathered circle, bumping your shoulder hard enough that you stagger. It overtakes the lurch of your heart for just a moment; you’re almost grateful for it.

~ 𐀔 ~ 𐀔 ~ 𐀔 ~

Reblogs and comments are extremely appreciated!

I do not give permission for my work to be translated or reposted!

[therealaxlrose]

intro <3 blog #1

thx for the gifs @beanzbyartificalmeans ! ily baddie/p👅👅

hide them fag- oh I mean uhh *EHEM*

Hi!! u can call me Axl/Ax, Helena, Zero, or lo/lolo! (pronounced low, derived from my real name lol)

im 13, my pronouns are she/they/he, im genderfluid and bisexual!

my pinterest

Elvis rp blog is @genderfluid-elvis-numba2

girlblog is @lolo-del-rey

hc/au/freaky/future fanfic blog side blog is @plotwhatplot,

mcr ecosystem blog is @mcr-as-dumb-lil-sillys

I am THE cunt dracula 👅

Certified alt kid of many different styles!! X33

im a therian, otherkin, and age regressor/dreamer! <3

my theriotypes are snow leopard, cat, and wolf, my kintype is vampire, and i regress from ages 3-5 XD

my current hyperfixation is my chemical romance so i post a lot abt them lol, my side fixations r nirvana, nu metal, hesitant alien, stranger things!

i love music (duh), art, dancing, singing, writing and being on the internet ^^ bands/singers i fw: nirvana, mcr, gnr, melanie martinez, marina, lana del rey, limp bizkit, korn, slipknot, tv girl, gerard way (solo work), fiona apple, smashing pumpkins, sabrina carpenter, olivia rodrigo, hole, soad, ptv, p!atd, fob, finn wolfhard (solo work), dove cameron, gnr, david bowie, kittie, the beatles, siouxie and the banshees, jack off jill, mitski, and prolly like WAYYYYYY more i cant think of rn lol

my quotev acc is "PARTY POISON" but im not on there much lol

Music!!

IMPORTANT STUFF UNDERCUT! please read this before interacting!

DNI: anyone who wants to give me shit for liking melanie martinez's music, jimmy urine supporters, porn/nsfw acc, pedohile, zoophile, rape supporter, facist, racist, sexist, hater, cyberbully, trying to flirt w/ me or shi, anti therian, anti furry, bullys, not inclusive of minorities/alt ppl/ etc, nsfw agere, ANY age play or pet play kinks. YOU WILL BE BLOCKED AND BIT!! ( i bite bad ppl!!1!! >:3)

BYI: if ur saying smth that u think could be taken the wrong way pls use tone tags!

DNF: porn blogs, any of those "gofundme" blogs, any blogs related or in support of the dni factors (EVEN IF U DONT MAKE POSTS ABT IT!! DONT FOLLOW ME I DONT WANT UR VIBES HERE!!) hate blogs, main blogs with side blogs of the previous factors, U WILL ALSO BE BLOCKED AND BIT!!!!!!!!!

asks i will delete: asking for donations, even if its smth i agree with i fear i have no money nor will i put the pressure on my followers to give u money tho i wish u all good health, anything i find offensive, any asks from the dnf and dni factors

things to know: this blog is not always sfw! i do make slightly mature jokes and maybe even suggestive reblogs! i cuss a lot including the f slur and such, i also reblog things with blood and gore sometimes so if u r sensitive to these things pls keep that in mind! (I suggest putting on a setting that blocks that kind of content if u still want to follow me or view my posts but don't use those settings so I'm not exactly sure if that's how it works 🥲) I also don't experience my alterhumanity very gently sometimes.. and I'm not afraid to speak those feelings! i may post things relating to a desire for violence, murder, cannibalism, stuff about blood, ect! This also bounces back to my reblogs being gorey and stuff I LIKE DISTURBING SHIT!!

if u are actually looking for a nsfw blog of mine, the closest u could get would be my blog @plotwhatplot , all the same dnf, dni, and dna (do not ask) factors apply MAYBE except for the more nsfw factors but only to a certain point of severity and appropriateness !

and i think that should be it, if theres any thing else u think is suggestive or needs to be listed here pls tell me! <3

Ok bye bitch here's some blinkies, a songs and my shayla

Kurt my shayla 🥺🫶🫶🫶