#finally posting some old stuff
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FORGETTABLE-AU (page 82-85)
THAT LAZYBONES!!
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#So sorry it took me almost 2 weeks to post these#I was busy irl but ALSO I had too much fun doing extra art and forgot to work on these for like 3 days lmao#NOW THIS TIME I DO HAVE SOME THING TO SAY#YAY RIVERPERSON! SO MANY PEOPLE GUESSED CORRECTLY!#It wasn't that hard#We know Papyrus knows the river person#are they friends? idk BUT I PERSONALLY THINK THEY ARE#I just LOVEEE looking at the dialogue and making connections#I referenced one of the lines from the river person here...sometimes they'll ask you if you know any game you can play with a dog...#They said they were “asking for a friend...”#And I couldn't help but think about Papyrus' problem with the annoying dog LMAO#+ Papyrus seems very excited to know if the river person is there when you call him nearby that area#Okay so... now ...some comic thing that I made up but also didn't...#“FLOWEY DOESN'T KNOW WHO THE RIVER PERSON IS?”#okay so...#I feel like#It's not very common for them to be there...#When talking with Undyne around that area it's kind of *unclear* if she knows about the river person being there....#She tells you about the river connecting different areas and that you should “jump in”#She then clarifies that's the only thing they got for public transport#AND LIKE? It's unclear if she's telling you to jump in the boat (OR IF SHE KNOWS THERE'S SOMEONE WITH A BOAT) or is she's literally telling#you to jump in the river?????#Anyways...so...that's that#HEHE Flowey and Papyrus finally arrived at the house! WOHOO#Sans is too lazy to bring his old stuff to the surface! (or does he still think he'll end up back in the underground eventually?)#undertale#undertale comic#forgettable-au-comic#papyrus#flowey
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how seb and clora get together in my fic 💕bc what better time and place to confess and share your first kiss than around a bunch of inferi + the dead body of a man you just killed?? 🥰💖
#and they say romance is dead#i remember how excited i was when brainstorming this scene LOL im still so happy with it/how i wrote it and glad i finally drew it#when i got the idea of seb using the relic to make an inferi army and save her BAHHA like...i get it clora. i get it.😔✊#id ALSO confess on the spot after seeing that LMAO like it could have been ANY man at that point and id be like... marry me???#obvs i had to shorten it and cut out some stuff BUT i got the gist of the scene#sad i didnt manage to include some stuff but it would have ruined the flow.....c'est la vie#god they really just make out for the entire beginning of that chapter tho LMFAOO god i had so much fun writing and posting every week#those early fandom days........(sighs wistfully and stares out the window like an old man)#hogwarts legacy#sebastian sallow#sebastian sallow x mc#sebastian sallow x oc#hogwarts legacy sebastian#sebastian x mc#hogwarts legacy fanfiction#clora clemons#choccyart#victor rookwood
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graph
bonus:
#xmen#xmen comics#magneto#is this the part where i have to tag everyone because everyone actually is like. semi significant in these. sure JVAELKVJEALK#cyclops#jean gray#beast#iceman#angel#warren worthington iii#hank mccoy#bobby drake#toad#mortimer toynbee#snap sketches#welcome back to Finally Drawing Months-Old Ideas VJELVKJAEKL#I Repeat love how you can tell what comics ive been reading based on what i draw like No Shit but still... lol ...#this comic is so niche but so is most of my stuff jVELAKJA I MADE THIS FOR MEEEE#it has my kids it has toad it has magneto being Unnecessary. this is for ME. also charlie lookin darlin but thats normal anyway#also hi remember how i was complaining about colors from my tablet some days ago.#i didnt realize the 'protective eye' setting was on. which yk makes the screen tinted yellow#LIKE I SAID OUT LOUD TO MY BROTHER 'lol my screen's yellowish' AND IT DIDNT CLICK#i only realized it was on when i went to turn it on at night one night and i was like. Oh 🧍♂️#anyways. sillies. all the kids....#see i thought i was gonna post this WAY earlier but as i was finishing the first version i. well i changed the last panel like three times#but even then i was like 'ok but i wanna draw the boys bein silly..' and indecisive as i was with which version i wanted#i . drew both. and have just made this a goofy two parter or whatever#ANYWAYS !!!! its great bein able to do personal stuff again ... i still have work this to do but its significantly less#so i feel more at ease to do small stuff like this#i do hope to tackle a bigger idea this month tho. while i was drawin this out all i could think of was That idea
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#ninja showdown#my immortal soul#rc9gn first ninja#first ninja#chase young#first ninja x chase young#*screams into teh void* FRUCKING FINALLY. this is the biggest batch of some of old mis stuff i doodled back in freakin APRIL dear lord#it took me so long to finish them and for some reason my brain just insisted that all of these must be in one post#i probably could have broken them up in smaller poses but no. fukingbrain#i gotta make smaller posts of all the other OTHER stuff leftover lol i have so many doodles in wips OTL#and yes most of them were drawn by pose references because i found absolutely banger art and poses i wanted to draw them in#and yes i am indeed salivating over my own silly ship because i am a cringe loser but i am free!!!
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oc time again! + her town & culture (heavily inspired by pre-roman italic populations)
she is suri sauthon. her story is linked to my swtor imperial agent, tar'x, but most of her life except for the one year away where she meets him, is spent in a town in the mountains of mirial.
despite mirial being cold and desert, and many cities developing underground, her town flourishes thanks to a force nexus, venerated in the form of an ancient, sacred, alive crystal. the ecosystem of that mountain depended on what "the horned crystal" was capable of giving them, but mirialans couldn't live off of that alone, so they developed trade and some rudimental technology, even if oftentimes it was bought thanks to the highly profitable trade of a plant used to make medicines that slowed down aging and had overall healing properties.
note: everything that's generated by this nexus has these healing properties BUT they have to be processed, except for those who bathed in the waters of the cavity under the crystal - the "real" nexus, but not the worshipped one. the waters were sacred but they were not thought to be miraculous, unlike the crystal, who instead was thought of as the keystone of the ecosystem: without it, everything would fall apart (and that is partially true: the cavity was the "real" nexus but thanks to the crystal, also strong in the force, the properties were spread all over the mountains). those who bathed in the cavity's waters - so, all of the town, who had a sort of baptism there - could eat the plant, make whatever food with it, and not only that plant, but everything generated by the nexus, that, again, had similar properties. this allowed people to live up to normal life-spans without advanced medicines or, much, really. to those who didn't live there, though, after the processing, had incredible effects, slowing down aging - for those who took it regularly - and making people able to live up to half a century more than the average]
originally, there were four tribes of nomads that lived thanks to horned farm animals that decided to settle down into one bigger town and other smaller settlements, to live off of transhumance. this division of the tribes stayed into the political and social organization: every person belonged to one tribe specifically, and had slightly different rituals and culture. for examples, each tribe had their own priests and healers, with different techniques and traditions. the town, tho, was guided by a group of people in the high priesthood, a position you could reach only by having earned the trust of all tribes. those high priests had many roles: they guided the people into sacred processions common to all the tribes, they managed the trading with outsiders, they did the maintenance of the temple of the summit (the one that functioned as casket to the crystal) and created a special liquid to offer the crystal that helps it grow.
this particular temple was important because 1. it was very visible, from every angle of the town, and it became an important identity symbol; 2. it stored the venerated horned crystal; 3. it had the altar where sacrifices were made for the crystals. that altar had a hole connected to the cavity, that allowed the liquids to reach the underground; 4. it had various symbols: statues representing each tribe + the high priesthood, and typical mirialan tattoos carved into the wood of the trees that served as columns for the temple, symbolizing 8 values that who dared to enter HAD to have; 5. it was on the way to an important lake (called "mother lake" because the lake the town was built around to depended on the waters of that other lake) where they traveled to in important processions; 6. it was said that a the wizard who unified the tribes made it with its magic, making the plant grow to hold the temple's roof. this wizard was, actually, a force user, obv.
BACK TO HER THOUGH: she's daughter of one of the high priests, who was in charge of managing the trades with outsiders, and lives in a house on the mountains with her mother and him. her parents are from different tribes (that's one of the things that earned him trust from the 4 tribes): when a child is born from two different tribes, they don't pick one to allign to, but they're usually linked automatically to the one with more relatives in it (in her case, the father's tribe: she had many uncles and aunts on his side while her mom only had one sister).
later, though, she got quite tied to her mother's tribe due to a mysterious illness that only her mother's tribe healer was able to cure. she spent 4 years (from 10 to 14 years old) living with the healer and learned her secrets. to better study, she wrote them down. when she returned home, she studied to become a priestess with her father. at 22 (the average age: you can't become priest before your 20s), she was supposed to take a test and become a priestess, but the healer of her mother's tribe died and the tribe asked her to take her place. she couldn't technically do that, but both tribes estimated both her and her parents and she was allowed to become both. she then decided to try to become a high priestess, and became one at 25 (a quite young age). being part of the council, she tried to convince the various tribe healers to unite their knowledges and write them down, and eventually made it. healers still remained tribe based but they now had an "upper, inter-tribe level" similar to high priesthood.
years later, the sacred horned crystal is stolen from the temple by some Hutt mercenaries looking for a profit. given the trust she has earned from all the tribes and the fact that her father is the high priest that deals with outsiders (and she's been hearing stories and advice about it since she was little), she is the one tasked with getting it back. without the growing crystal, the keystone to their ecosystem, the village would have lasted only a few years. in hrr quest, she meets imperial intelligence agent tar'x laran and, as they "solve the mystery" and fight to have it back, they get closer. they'll get married and have a daughter, Vegoia (who's the only one who actually will get to the plot of my story. this was all background)
#i overdeveloped this part of the background. IT'S QUITE LITERALLY USELESS. like. Vegoia will have so few memories of it (she'll become jedi)#i will make a post about her too when I'll finish designing her and outlining her story BUT that may be difficult cuz the frame for the mai#story is quite difficult to match with how developed the other stories are getting and i have to figure it Much Stuff yet#so I'm using these post to like. fix a certain part lf the lore because even my own notes are getting older and messy. better to start over#ANYWAY for those curious & who are still reading (if u exist. WTF THANK U!!); my main story is actually a research file in the jedi archive#BASICALLY i was trying to write my own story for years but then i watched a video (tcw doesn't hold up by sheev talks i think) and i finall#understood how to frame all of these stories together in a way that i feel can add to the star wars lore (because. the others were just#like. okay but who cares unless me? and i did want to have a cool frame that maybe some nerd would be interested in looking into)#so: when ahsoka anakin and obi return from mortis; they tell the council about it (yoda knows about it in s6). sheev talks complained that#it was incredibly full of stuff that was done so poorly it could ruin a big part of the original sw story itself and it was never brought u#again. and honestly i agree. SO my story is about a jedi that is tasked with research on the celestials & by having him figure out stuff i#can minimize/limit/reframe some of the controversial things in there (i love mortis arc so bad but i also agree with his critic. I'll Fix™)#so. many stories will be about people who have previously seen the celestials or have been to mortis one way or another (pre-tcw obv) & hav#had experience & knowledge that the researcher is looking for. so i get to have an anthology with many stories#and have a cool frame I'm intrested in developing + i can experiment with different storytelling styles depending on how he finds out stuff#+ there was another sw story with a similar frame i think? so if i decide to write the story as if it was the file itself and not the searc#i can have even a REFERENCE of what a file like that is supposed to be. LIKE. IT ALL FITS!!!#sw#star wars#swtor#the old republic#star wars oc#imperial agent#star wars fanart#mirialan oc#mirialan#star wars story#star wars the old republic#oc: suri sauthon
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Teef + sleepy heads
#sam and max#sam and max freelance Police#my art#narnour's art#drawing ooc for self comfort reasons ~#posting some old stuff because my final exams are starting soon and I won't be able to draw for a while#the left sketch in the second pic is mostly inspired by my uncle and his fat cat#they were just awake from a nap not knowing who or where they were
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anatomy of a heart // open up
cardiogram.carrd.co
#durarara#shizaya#a cheap imitation#i made a thing#chapter 48#you're supposed to go into the link yourself but i know most won't and for posterity here's a video archive of it#oh yea i also reached out to @glaciesdraco for suggestions on this so thanks to them for helping out#this is over a yeaaaar old#twitter post was oct 28 2023#did tweak it a bit though i was kinda struggling over that#mostly just the pink card near the end and some colours here and there#still feels kinda wack and not cohesive to me but it's been over a year so#gotta let this one go#finally unloading these last few things i made for the book club omg#i considered doing more sound design on this one too but#i just never did it so i'm making myself just leave it as this#i like the sentiment behind this one a lot but the execution is kindaaaa#if i'm feeling brave i'll also transcribe the little write up i made alongside this as an add-on or something#i shouuuld generally do that with the stuff i wrote on there#when i get the time#this is honestly kinda embarrassing to me but my brain dictates i put them up#(in chronological order)#before i move forward#and i neeeed to needto need to
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we will always be here.
happy pride <3
#trans pride#trans positivity#transgender#transgender pride#pride art#pride month#trans artist#lgbtqia#dragon#my art?#did some different/experimental stuff w this one largely bc I rly wanted to make it but Really didn’t want to do neat lines for the flag bc#pain#been trying to finish some form of it all month long :’/ finally got somewhere im ok with#meant to post it yesterday but then I decided it would actually be better if I just ignored the internet completely and made myself a#catboy wizard hat from an old flannel sheet instead#and I was right#gotta make ur own serotonin sometimes. a lot of the time#i rly don’t know what to caption this one. feels like I should Say something but words rly aren’t my strong suit especially ones that matter#but fellow trans ppl know that i am sending you so many virtual hugs even if I can only do it in tiny dragon form#we r going to be ok. somehow
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Sorry if this might be a rude question but why don’t you just make a seperate account for your nsfw fics?
not rude, it's a valid question! tbh it's a combination of a couple reasons.
i started posting anonymous dead dove batcest fics long before i had the balls to make a tumblr. at first i was content to just leave them unassociated with each other because i didn't really care about them being tied to me. i made this blog to actually show solidarity to my partner who wanted to make a sideblog for Sandman comic stuff so we could cheerlead each other and be brave together, since i've wanted to make a batcest sideblog but i've been nervous about actually having to get it going. (mal ik you're reading this go be brave and actually make your blog so i can cheerlead you damnit-) only did it dawn on me then that i should probably mention the fics i've written on the blog after like, three of them were posted anonymously. and it would've annoyed me to have half of them anonymous and half of them not, because notifications for them would've gone in different places. i could go back and take my fics off anon if i wanted to, but i can't switch the account they're on without taking them down entirely and that'd fuck over people who have them bookmarked already.
which, ties into my second reason, if i made an entire second ao3 account it'd be harder for me to see notifications, reply to stuff, and post things for both accounts because i'd have to constantly switch. and honestly i'd be terrified of accidentally posting on the wrong one on a brain fog day. posting fics is always the most tedious part of writing them for me lol. it's easier for me to stay logged into one account and have all of my stuff in one place for me and just use the anonymous collection when i feel like it. if ao3 pseuds worked like tumblr blogs, where you can't see all my side blogs but i can, i would've used pseuds, but since you can see all pseuds on an ao3, i felt it was a moot point.
and the last reason is i just feel more comfortable being anonymous on ao3 because of the rise in anti culture. on tumblr it's very easy for me to just filter that out and find the people i want to follow and block the people i don't. i don't mind getting hate, on tumblr or on ao3. but i think, for whatever reason you want to blame it on, there's been a massive boom of antis on ao3 who are very entitled about how they read on ao3. i tag extensively, but i just feel safer from getting targeted attacks if everything i write on ao3 isn't attached to one profile. if people like a fic i wrote, want to find more i always link my tumblr in the notes, but if an anti wants to get huffy with me, they can't easily track down my other things. they definitely could if they wanted to, but being anonymous on ao3 just makes me feel more secluded, in a weird way. it's like saying "if you want you can come find me but on here i'm just a weird faceless guy throwing stuff in the void". i've used ao3's anon feature a lot, actually, i used to be a hydra trash party dumpster kid back when that was in it's prime.
i also used to be vaguely popular on a different tumblr blog and my main ao3 and while i think it'd definitely be cool if i got a decent chunk of followers on this blog too, i don't really miss having fanfiction do so well i got targetted hate on all of my fics from the same people, i had my fics stolen, etc. it was really exhausting for me. i have 120+ works on ao3, not counting what's anonymous, and that level of exposure tires me, even when i use my main ao3 to post things that aren't trashy. it's just a weird feeling knowing so many people are subscribed to you on ao3 and what if you post something they won't like because you jumped fandoms again, or you're posting something niche, or you don't think it fills enough fandom tropes to be well-liked. i used to obsessively think like that, and it made me not write the things i wanted to because i cared about numbers. and i don't want to slide back into that hole. writing on anonymous is mostly to remind myself i wrote this for me, and if other people like it, they can come find me, but i don't have to perform like that anymore. if i get a really weird fucked up idea, i can write the really weird fucked up idea. at the end of the day, just makes me more comfortable! but i get it's a super confusing set up from an outsider perspective so, i really don't mind the question, thank you for asking!!
#necrotic festerings#batcest#pro ship#necrotic answerings#tbh asking the question gave me the chance to explain it so ty!#might link this in my about me or my masterlist for ease of access#i don't want to like. overstate how big i was on an old blog bc i was not like. a celebrity by *any* means.#but i had a ship-specific blog and i was certainly a “big name fan” for that specific rarepair#and it like. took over my life when i was a teen#i look back on it fondly now but i really regret that i would obsess so heavily over numbers and what made a fic do well#my favorite fics to write were htp back then bc for htp culture writing on anon was normal since that was during the dreamwidth days#and i just. liked that veil of anonymity and i think i defaulted to that when i decided to finally start posting batcest stuff#(all of this makes me sound so old i'm only 22 i just started fandom really fucking young which i don't recommend)#and when i say one fic got big. i mean it. i have found that fic on instagram and pinterest and tiktok and even. facebook.#do you know what it's like when your fic gets reuploaded to facebook without your permission and you see what boomers think of it.#that was so mortifying.#funnily enough the boomers were actually really nice i was just shocked to find it there scrolling one day.#it was instagram that was super mean to me and traumatized my ass. man ppl dug into me for the tinest things. do not miss that.#anyway the point is#i've tasted vitality and niche fandom status(tm) and i hated both. and i just cannot do that to myself again#ergo#anon on ao3 and a blog to post my thoughts when i have them.#it's a nice system for me#i have some stuff on my main ao3 that toes the line of like. dark dead dove trash.#and i had antis get mad at me bc their fave fluffy fic was written by. gasp. a proshipper.#and yeah that soured me to existence on ao3.#getting into the rise of anti culture is a whole other discussion that'd have me going on for hours but i will shut up now.#wow this got long. i like to fucking talk don't i.
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Happy (belated) Holidays from me and Tangerine Moon 🍊
I hope everyone is having a nice week of holiday celebrations 💙 and of you're in Xmas/New Year's limbo - I hope the bed rotting is going so so swell 😌
#photo is a week old but i never posted so!#i've been lurking a lil bit and saw some really cool st exchange stuff 🥹🥹🥹 i'm gonna be slowly catching up with yall#sis and fiancé have just left 🥲💔 i miss her already (but happy to finally have some Alone Time™ again)#how's everyone doing?? got any cool xmas gifts??#personally i'm very excited about my new headphones cus mine were LITERALLY held together by insolating tape and blue tack#tragic state they were in really. finally got gifted a new pair and not only are they so comfy and amazing quality.#THEY HAVE A NOISE CANCELLING FUNCTION. I'm gonna be SO at peace wow. silence and unbotherment 😌💙#also Ramón has a new sibling 🥹 i'll show you a bit later. i'm having brekie now (at 1pm yes)#anyways. miss yall love you muwah muwah muwah 💙#moon
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what are hyakinthos's thoughts on the boatman and the slow boat in general?
Ooh, taking a quick sidestep from the rest of the ask game asks to answer this real quick! Short answer: a little complicated but generally friendly! Long answer: Gotta give some backstory first, bear with me. I have been thinking so much about belief systems vs established canon. Canon says that every human who dies regardless of belief (there may be nuance I'm forgetting but I'm in full speed infodump mode rn so that's a problem for future me) goes to the Far Shore. I say that's... kinda bleak? Also I'm just not a fan of stories where there is only One Real Belief and the rest are played off as silly distraction or whatever, but I digress.
A lot of his everything is based around the idea that both belief and proper death/burial care are important to get people to the afterlife they're meant to be in. Ritual makes all the difference between going to the Far Shore vs the Fields of Asphodel, for example.
His Boatman is Charon, or at least accepts the name. Hyakinthos has a working relationship with him and has probably taken up the oars at least a few times, especially for people who need the extra care in getting to where they need to be.
There's respect there, but there's also a certain... I'm not sure I have the words for it. The idea that death in the Neath is uncertain in so many ways (whether it'll stick that time, whether the person will make it to their afterlife or if they'll slip between the cracks and end up in the wrong place, etc) can be... discomfiting, to him. So while he does hold the boatman in high regard, there's always some little uncertainty there.
(Every so often, by their standards at least, Hyakinthos will bring him a very old obol. The Boatman will always refuse it. This is a ritual of its own. They'll sit for a while and talk anyways, and then part ways afterwards a little lighter.)
#a lot of this is. very theoretical sjfndkjnhg. but that is what he believes#a belief that he's held for longer than he can remember at this point#his lover was buried wrong in the neath. with respect but with the wrong customs#a different culture doing their best but not understanding the nuance#having to exhume and re-bury his lover according to their beliefs permanently rewrote some stuff in his brain i think#he just never wants anyone else to have to go through that fear. of a loved one lost. of being lost themselves in an unfamiliar afterlife#to him final death is a blessing and a comfort and he intends to keep it that way. no fear of what comes after because they know it's okay#i'm not sure if i properly answered your question despite all that dfkgnfhkd if so i'm sorry i got possessed#belief is important in the neath but it's hard to tell where it begins and ends in a literal sense. if the far shore really is all there is#then hyakinthos would feel actively betrayed by the boatman for disregarding all these peoples' beliefs#but if the far shore is an option but not the absolute (as he believes) then it's a lot more gentle of a regard#recognizing that mistakes can be made and dreading them but understanding that the boatman is very old and doing his best#they both are really#it's. you can see the difference there#but without having a distinct idea of where the lines lay it's a little hard to say for absolute certainty y'know#whoops did not mean to leave a whole other post in the tags. i have been quiet about this guy for too long. too much time to think abt shit#ty for bearing with me i guess kdsjgdhgdfgjh#the scientist scribbles#c: hyakinthos athanasiou
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The leader and his favourite hunter | Fierce on the battlefield, smitten with each other, and doting parents to their children. A'dyalani taught Zara to use a bow, dreaming of the day she'd surpass her as a hunter, while A'vheo took Zeke under his wing, preparing him to one day lead the clan. Oh, how proud they'd be if they could see where their children would end up.
#ffxiv#final fantasy xiv#final fantasy 14#gpose#gposers#ffxiv gpose#ffxiv oc#ffxiv wol#ffxiv miqo'te#oc: zara#oc: zeke#my gposes#miqo family#oc: a'dyalani#oc: a'vheo#took these awhile ago and never got around to posting#so here's some old stuff while I stockpile new DT stuff for later :3
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no promises anymoooooreeeee i'll appear online when i appear online 😭 every time i say "ooh i think life is almost done being overwhelming!" it. becomes even more overwhelming in the dumbest ways. all i can manage rn when i'm not stressing myself into a shut-down state is staring at the wall while listening to youtube essays + mindlessly crocheting.
i might queue up ppls art and fics w/o commentary in the tags... i want other ppl to see what all of my cool friends have made, but i genuinely can't think right now with this monstrous brain fog. i'm really sorry, just. yeah. maybe i'll think of some way to make it up later!!! once the dust has settled!!!! but until then i wuv u and miss u. smiles.
[venting in tags including familial manipulation and ableism. i. didn't mean to write all of that, thiss was originally going to be a main blog post but. aaaaaAAAAAA!!!!!
also no need for replies or anything, i'd turn them off for just the one post if i could kjsndkn, i just needed to get things out and go eep jsjndsfdn ok bye bye bye bye!!!!]
#goddd my family finds it sooooooo funny that i can't do basic tasks! it's soooo funny that i can't even think of a horror movie to watch#on halloween bc i genuinely can't remember a single one right now. it's soooo funny that i can't take cardboard boxes or#old furniture out of my room without help bc i've physically and mentally and emotionally burnt out for Months.#and me not being able to move shit out after two (2) days makes me a hoarder somehow. and ofc hoarding is a moral failing#and my mom has to give me a stern talking-to about hoarding things... that were. again. in my room for 2 days....#[tbc it isnt a moral failing no matter the reason. life is hard and things happen and it can be hard to get rid of things for Reasons.]#nevermind them making constant snide remarks about me using ugly 'mismatched' desk / storage furniture. bc it was free / cheap? no income??#AND!!!!! i have a couple of new diagnoses. which doesn't change much day to day but it does make my family making fun of me#even more dumbfounding. like. this explains a lot of really scary unexplained symptoms that constantly leave me#housebound for weeks but uhhh haha hehe hoho??? so silly so funny that i'm barely conscious for multiple weeks???#and you can see that i'm getting worse but that makes it funnier??? hmm!!!#also nevermind that i've told them the exact reason why i've been like this (read: them) but that ALSO makes it funnier somehow.#but i also can't say shit bc they're doing something ~nice~ for me (out of convenience + after almost a decade of 'don't get comfortable'#and 'don't decorate this room bc it isn't yours' and 'you need to be ready to move out by x date'#only for the date to arrive and them to pull the 'i never said that. and if i did say it i didn't mean it like that.#and if i did mean it like that i don't anymore.' card. + any big renovations are things they wanted anyway. hmmmm!!#and how i have to do all of the phys labor alone bc if i ask for help i get made fun of!!! and yelled at that i'm doing things Wrong#(hint: i'm following instructions to the letter but. my family knows better than those silly things!! ^^ ))#jfc i sure did rant. uh. yeah. things. are really weird and uncomfy and i feel thankful that i finally can have my own things on display#outside of closets and bins again after a decade?? but i'm also waiting for the other shoe to drop / them to tell me i owe them in#some way??? bc that's how it works. 'i'm doing a nice thing you didn't even ask me for so now you have to do whatever i tell you to.'#meanwhile i can't even maladaptive daydream my way through it bc my brain is soup right now. can't remember basic things abt#my interests bc i've been on negative battery / spoons for a couple of months straight and it's only getting worse.#OKAY TLDR i'm not in a state to do anything until everything irl gets settled. and i'm trying So Hard to get it all over with but there's#only so much i can do in a day before i completely shut down. i didn't even get into the insurance stuff i've been fighting too ughhhh.#so if i show up on here in short spurts -- hi! bye! hi!! i wuv and care u!!! hope youre well mwah mwah!!!!!!! i'll post what i can and then#disappear when i need to recharge. it is what it is. i need to try to sleep now... uh if this post disappears when i wake up.... yeah......#📌 [ my posts. ]#💭 [ my thoughts. ]#vent -
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BCD doodle thats a little outdated
#my art#my ocs#digital art#oc#original character#behind closed doors#bcd#matilda greenson#jennifer jackson#chris kandell#hazel ledger#scarlett muntz#i rlly wanted to post smth but i havent finished any oc stuff lately so. this is old#im trying to work on refs but im struggling to find focus bc#i just have SO many characters and im trying to work on too many at once#i just need to focus on some#get comfortable and confident in their designs and personalities#so i can finally make refs for them and whatnot .#i should just have some fun and whimsy and doodle them mindlessly ahead of time but. UGHH#im unorganized !
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#this hbomb video dropping the same week i read a fic that had a bit SUSPICIOUSLY CLOSE to one of my old clemvi comics :)#dialogue halfheartedly edited and still in the exact same order of delivery. too similar to be a coincidence of ideas#felt ... not good.. reading it :(#compared to me looking forward to finally reading a fic that the writer came to me and asked if they could adapt some of my ideas for :)#just goes to show the difference that literally just asking can make#im not gonna say what fic it is im just talking on my blog ok but the timing makes me :) i feel a little better now#whats funny is that i wrote the dialogue the way i did to condense the idea down into a 2 page comic. you couldve expanded on it...#like just ask!!! im not posting on the internet just to scream into the void ya know like i actually like sharing and talking about stuff#it speaks
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some critters on microsoft whiteboard
#my art#dragon ball#goku#kakarot#vegeta#dragon ball z#this is from march sorry its kinda old now#finally working on catching up on posting.. phew#some stuff happened in my personal life sorry :p
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