#finally cleaned out my car and entered all the codes for the empty packs i’ve been saving

[sarcasmic-skies]

[230914] philip morris usa owns my ass, exhibit b:

[when-they-write-stuff]

sing me to sleep, bastard

pairing: sterek

word count: 2.5k

rating: mature

warnings: swearing, slight angst

notes: published a little while ago (on ao3), but not on here and is edited! Because sometimes, Stiles just has to get his feelings out.

Stiles was tired.

Like pulling at his soul, trying to drag him into an early grave, tired. He’d say he wished for the sweet relief of death but after everything he’d faced, that would be a crappy way to go. So, Stiles continued to trudge through his shift at the open 24/7 coffee shop and tried not to think about how he could be sleeping right now.

His co-worker noticed. 

“Stiles, the bags under your eyes literally have their own bags.”

Stiles screwed up his face and groaned, dropping his head onto the counter. The shop was empty other than one other person— another college student, by the looks of it— because no one else in their right mind would come out this late. On weekends, Stiles’s shifts didn’t end until four in the morning. So of course, he was exhausted.

“Thanks,” he said, turning his head toward Milo. “I didn’t notice.”

“Have you been sleeping?”

In truth? Stiles had not been sleeping. When he wasn’t working, he was attending classes at Beacon Hills Community College. When he wasn’t attending classes, he was chasing the monster of the week around town. Quite frankly, he never seemed to be sleeping.

But he couldn’t tell Milo that.

“Of course I’ve been sleeping,” Stiles said with a laugh. “Who doesn’t love sleep? I love sleep. I would marry sleep if that was acceptable.”

Milo raised a brow. Stiles could tell he wasn’t convinced.

“I’ve just been stressed with school,” he said, shrugging. “You know how it goes.”

That finally made Milo grin. The guy chuckled, turning back to the mug he was cleaning, and nodded. “Damn right I know how it goes. Life’s a bitch, man.”

Life was a bitch. And Stiles was just doing his best to survive it.

He lifted his head off the counter and focused again on the book he’d sneakily read between customers. The last thing Stiles’s brain wanted to do was read Hemingway at the moment, but his professor insisted the author was a classic and therefore a must-read for the class. Stiles thought it was a miracle he hadn’t thrown the book out a window yet.

He’d gotten close. Multiple times.

Suddenly, the bell over the door rang. Stiles slapped his book shut and stuffed it out of sight, raising his head with a smile that was all sorts of professional. Only, the expression melted when he saw who’d entered. One such figure who’d frozen the moment he’d seen Stiles too.

“Derek?”

Derek blinked, staring at him for a long moment. Then he turned and walked right back out of the cafe. Stiles stared in shock and Milo shot him a confused glance. “Dude?”

“Did you just see that too?”

“Um, yeah. Do you know that guy or something?”

“Oh my god,” Stiles ripped his apron off. It really had been Derek— Derek Hale— the bastard who’d left town four months ago without so much of an explanation, and hadn’t been in contact since. Milo was looking at Stiles like he was crazy.

“Stiles, is everything alright?”

“Can you finish the rest of this shift without me?” Stiles asked, still struggling to pull his apron up around his head. “I swear I’ll be in your debt forever, seriously.”

“Sure, man,” Milo said. “I got your back.”

Stiles finally ripped off his apron and shot Milo a grin, dropping it to the floor. He didn’t even bother with his book— Hemingway could suck it— and scrambled over the counter. “Thank you so much, dude! I owe you!”

He didn’t hear Milo’s response as he stumbled outside. Derek’s camaro was already peeling out of the parking lot, but Stiles had him in his sights. The bastard wasn’t going anywhere.

Roscoe, thankfully, started without a struggle. Backing out, Stiles hit the gas and started in the direction Derek’s car had vanished. He couldn’t believe Derek actually had the nerve to come back to town, to see Stiles in the coffee shop, and then leave. Like Stiles was going to grow fangs of his own and rip his throat out of something.

Though, shit, if Stiles did have fangs, he just might. He was pissed.

Of course, Derek headed to his loft. The same loft that had been empty for four months, no matter how many times Stiles had driven past. And he did drive past. Every day at first, then weekly. Eventually, he’d just given up, because it was obvious Derek wasn’t coming back.

Stiles had moped for weeks. Scott didn’t even understand why.

Stiles wasn’t willing to admit why.

Derek must have gotten there in record time because the Camaro was empty. Stiles stuffed his keys into his pocket and stalked toward the loft. He punched in the security code to the alarm, because the last thing he wanted was to let Derek known he’d followed him, and stalked upstairs. 

Still, he imaged Derek would catch his scent.  Good,  he thought.  Let him. Stiles was willing to make Derek squirm.

He pulled the door open and stalked inside. Derek was pacing in the middle of the room and spun around, freezing as Stiles approached. His eyes were wide like a deer caught in headlights and Stiles jabbed a finger right into his chest, fury billowing over.

“Derek, you asshole, what the hell? I can’t believe you didn’t tell me you were back in town! No, no, actually I totally can, but I can’t believe you just ran like that. Dude! What the  hell? ”

“Stiles.”

“Stiles? Stiles? That’s all you have to say? That’s so messed up, Derek!”

Derek reached up, taking Stiles’s hand, and pulled his finger away from his chest. Stiles did his best to continue scowling, but it was hard when Derek was practically holding his hand and looking like Stiles’s words had somehow gutted him. Even though he was the bastard who’d gone missing for four months. “Hey, Stiles.”

Stiles gaped at him. He couldn’t believe Derek had come back to Beacon and the first actual sentence he said was  ‘Hey, Stiles.’ It was so terrible. So wrong. It wasn’t fair.

“I hate you,” Stiles said. Derek flinched away and Stiles cursed himself, trying again. “Okay, fine, I don’t really hate you. But dude, where the hell did you go? Do you realize how long it’s been? Do you realize how worried I was?”

“You were worried?”

Shit, fuck. “The pack was worried.”

“But you said you.”

“No, stop twisting my words, Sourwolf. I meant the pack.”

Derek raised a brow and Stiles wanted to punch him for having the audacity to look like that. But instead, he deflated and glanced around the loft. 

“How long have you been back?”

“Only tonight.”

Stiles looked back at him. “You couldn’t have called? At least once to let me— to let us— know you were okay? The last time you vanished we found you buried in Aztec temple with a werejaguar out for revenge, dude. Anything could have happened.”

“I needed some time to get my head straight,” Derek said, letting go of his hand. Stiles tried not to feel too disappointed at the loss of contact. “I had to think about some things.”

“Things? What things could possibly be more important than the pack?”

Derek wouldn’t look at him. Stiles felt something in his chest twist and snap and he pulled away, crossing his arms over his chest. A chill raced up his spine.

“Leaving was an asshole thing to do, dude.”

“Don’t call me dude,” Derek said softly. Stiles glared at him.

“I’ll call you whatever I damn well please when you vanish for four months straight and then turn up out of nowhere without an explanation.”

Derek’s eyelashes fluttered. Struck by sudden guilt, Stiles took a deep breath.

“Don’t you realize Scott still needs you around? Just because he’s an Alpha and we’ve all graduated from high school doesn’t mean all the big baddies of Beacon Hills have suddenly gone away. They haven’t decided to give us a break just because we’re growing up, Derek. Hell, Lydia almost died last week because of a vengeful fairy!”

“I’m sorry,” Derek muttered, flinching away. He actually looked pained and that broke Stiles’s heart. Because everything Stiles had said was true. But not the whole truth. More people than Scott needed Derek Hale to remain in Beacon Hills. Stiles swallowed hard.

“Are you going to leave again?”

“What?” Derek looked at him in shock, eyes going wide. Stiles resisted the urge to curl up in on himself at the expression.

“Are you going to leave again? Or are you back for good?”

“Stiles,” Derek said, voice cracking slightly. The older man stepped forward, then hesitated, hands clenching in and out of fists at his sides. He ducked his head. “I’m here now.”

“But for how long?”

“As long as you’ll have me.”

Stiles looked at him in sharp confusion. Derek’s eyes searched his own, looking more vulnerable than Stiles had ever seen them. He looked cautious and scared. It was wrong.

“... Is that okay, Stiles?”

“Why did you leave, Derek?” Stiles asked shakily. “What were things?”

“I—” Derek trailed off. Stiles clenched his jaw.

“Derek, why the hell did you leave?”

Derek suddenly squared his shoulders and turned away, stalking across the room. The sudden change of mood was startling. “You should go, Stiles. I’m back now and you said what you came to.”

Stiles stared after him. Derek grabbed his bag and started unpacking, acting like Stiles was already gone. The man wouldn’t look back at him. Stiles blinked, turning toward the loft door, but then he stopped, turning back around. Frustration and anger crashed over him.

“You know what? No, Derek, you don’t get to do that!” Derek looked up at him, startled, and Stiles stalked forward again. “You don’t get to push me away, not again! Now, I’m sick and tired of  thinking  about you and wondering if I’m being an idiot  caring about you—”

“Caring about me?”

“— Don’t interrupt, Derek, I’m ranting here! It’s been three years since I got my head out of my ass and considered the possibility of having feelings for you, but that’s kind of hard when your always angsting and disappearing off the face of the earth—”

Stiles was cut off again, but this time because Derek’s lips were pressed against his. 

He gasped in shock and went still, and Derek started to pull back with the word  ‘sorry’ already falling off his lips. But then Stiles was wrapping his hands around Derek’s neck and pulling him back in. He kissed the man back, hard and hungry. 

Derek pressed back with equal ferocity. It was a battle of teeth and tongues, and Stiles had no idea why they hadn’t started doing this sooner. He stumbled back until he hit the wall and then Derek picked him up so Stiles could wrap his legs around his waist. He did so, nipping down the man’s neck before shoving his lips against his again. Derek growled deep in his throat. Stiles felt the sound go straight to his groin.

“Der—” Stiles gasped between breaths. “Derek, we should—”

“Stiles,” Derek groaned, pressing a hard kiss against his lips again. Stiles closed his eyes with a moan and a shudder ran through the older man’s body. Stiles couldn’t help but smirk as he moaned again, thrusting his hips forward this time. Derek’s grip tightened.  “Stiles.”

“Derek,” Stiles responded raspily. He closed his eyes as stubble traced down his neck and Derek’s lips breezed over skin, trailing down to his collarbone. The man latched on and sucked a mark there, making Stiles moan again. He could feel the way Derek reacted to that, hands clenching tighter around his hips. Derek pulled back again and before Stiles could whine about the lack of contact, Derek’s lips were ghosting across his again.

“Derek,” Stiles murmured.

Derek finally pulled back then, breaking them apart. His eyes were hazy. Stiles smiled back at him, feeling like he’d just been dunked underwater. His lips felt warm and puffy.

“So… you’re back.”

Derek blinked a few times. “Didn’t we just establish that?”

“I’d have you stay,” Stiles whispered. “If you want.”

“Of course,” Derek said. “I’ll stay.”

“Good,” Stiles smiled again. “Because now that I’m broken, I’m bought, and you’re stuck with me.”

“I broke you?” Derek said incredulously. Stiles grinned.

“Well, not yet. But that can always be arranged.”

Derek’s eyes darkened and he growled, hitching Stiles up higher on his hips. Turning, he carried him to the bed and dumped him down unceremoniously, making Stiles squawk in protest. But instead of kissing him again or doing anything  else, Derek righted him up and pulled the covers aside, before stuffing Stiles in. Then he pulled the covers back up. Stiles stared.

“Derek, what the hell are you doing?”

“It’s two in the morning, Stiles. You reek of exhaustion.”

“But Derek,” Stiles whined, trying to thrust his hips back up. “I was promised a good and proper breaking!”

Derek smirked down at him. “You look pretty broken to me.”

“Okay, now that’s just rude. You can’t leave me like this!”

Derek sat down on edge of the bed and carded his fingers through Stiles’s hair, face softening. Stiles relaxed unconsciously into the touch and nuzzled Derek’s giant hand, making the man chuckle. Stiles stiffened and narrowed his eyes at him.

“Stop that.”

“What?” Derek asked innocently, drawing his hand away. “That?”

“No, you asshole,” Stiles whined. “Laughing at me.”

“I’m not laughing,” Derek said, leaning over to press his lips against Stiles’s once more. Then he pulled back an inch, so his breaths were hot on Stiles’s face when he whispered, “I was chuckling.”

“Asshole,” Stiles shoved him away. Derek laughed openly this time.

Stiles didn’t want to admit it, but he was tired. He’d been tired even before all of whatever this was. Oh god, whatever this was. Stiles would have a panic attack about that in the morning. He was too tired to think straight right now.

Ha,  he thought.  Think straight.

Stiles thought about mentioning his genius to Derek, but the man’s fingers were in his hair again. Stiles closed his eyes automatically against the touch and he sighed, relaxing back into the pillows. He could still taste Derek on his lips; like cinnamon. It was nice, he decided sleepily.

“Derek,” he said softly. The man’s ministrations paused. “Don’t go.”

“I’m not going anywhere, Stiles.”

“No really,” Stiles repeated, already half asleep. “Don’t leave me again.”

He felt Derek lean forward, lips touching his forehead. Gentle fingers pulled the blankets all the way up to Stiles’s neck. “I promise.”

“Good,” Stiles murmured. “Now sing me to sleep, bastard.”

Derek chuckled against his skin. The vibration sent a shiver down his spine, somehow making his body relax even more. Carefully, Derek pulled back, though his fingers traced down Stiles’s arm and sketched circles over the back of his hand. Stiles could feel himself dropping.

The last thing he heard sounded suspiciously like humming.

[siribear]

old man stockton’s moniker fits more than skinny malone’s did, as she finds the old man sitting behind a counter scattered with paperwork. other caravaners have filed into the area, stocking their own counters with wares in contrast. deacon stands back again, blending in with the other caravan guards as she approaches their contact.

stockton nods his head. ‘tell me, friend, do you have a geiger counter?’

whisper shrugs. ‘mine is in the shop.’

he squints, looks her over. ‘you’re with our mutual friends, yes?’ he speaks slowly, low and careful. ‘then you know that i have a... package that’s been in my possession too long.’

they talk shop, their conversation entirely covert. she does get their pick up location out of him eventually: a church last seen occupied by raiders. returning to deacon, she relays the location. and that they’ll have to wait until nightfall to make their delivery.

‘we can do each other’s hair while we wait,’ he says as she leads the way. he gives her ponytail a playful tug, like they’re children back in kindergarten. at her look, ‘it suits you. you look more like a spy, now.’

she shakes her head, lets her hair smack his arm. ‘glad you approve.’

the outskirts of the city are quiet as they make their way to the church. the sun rises high over head, but a cool wind chills the air. it should be colder this time of year, she thinks. much colder. as it is, beginning of november, she can barely see her breath.

they take cover in a building next to the church. voices drift through the quiet, too low to be made out but just loud enough to be heard. two - three voices. deacon pulls out his rifle and counts the figures in the church. ‘i see five. maybe six. hard to see from this angle.’

‘the roof?’ she suggests, pointing up to a hole to the second floor.

‘because of course the stairs are broken,’ he sighs. he kneels so she can step into his cupped hands then lifts, heaving her toward the edge of the hole. ‘thank goodness you’re not that heavy. i don’t know if these old bones could handle it.’

whisper hauls herself up with some effort. when deacon jumps, she grabs a fistful of jacket and yanks - ‘those old bones are heavy,’ she says with exaggerated panting.

deacon pouts. ‘all muscle,’ he says, defensively.

to get to the roof, or the half of the roof that’s still standing, they climb out the upstairs window, deacon first. at the top, deacon pulls out his rifle again, counting the raiders through the blown open roof of the church. ‘only five. we could pick them off from here.’

further up the street, something catches her eye. ‘just past the church. look.’

he does. ‘pack of ferals. gr-eat. the sound will draw them over.’ whisper hums, then makes to drop back to the second floor. ‘where are you going?’

‘i have a dumb idea. cover me?’

sunlight glints off his sunglasses as he grins back at her. ‘of course.’

back on the ground floor, she quickly makes her way up the street, avoiding the church’s line of sight. she only looks back once to see deacon down on one knee, following her through his scope. it’s... comforting. in a way she’s never needed to be comforted, on the other end of a scope.

how her life has changed.

the pack of ferals hasn’t moved since she spotted them. they’re gathered around the hollowed out shell of a car, climbing over and under, looking for food. one silenced shot from deliverer takes off the arm of one and draws their attention.

two of them take off after her first. the others have to drag themselves out of the car first before they sprint toward her. and they’re faster than she thought. shit. she turns and runs back down the road. on the roof, she notices deacon raise his rifle to fire, but she waves him off.

‘what the fuck - ?’ is all she hears from the first raider before she all but barrels into him.

‘help, please,’ whisper gasps, out of breath. ‘they’re coming - they killed everyone - ’ before the raider can grab her, she pulls away. ‘oh god, they’re here,’ she yells and sprints back toward the house.

‘she brought fucking ferals!’ she hears another raider yell behind her, and ducks away when one of them takes a shot at her. the bullet skims her arm, cutting through the thin fabric of her flannel shirt. it stings, but it’s not enough to stop her from jumping through the open window of the house.

the raiders scream. gunshots are fired. the ferals howl in pain and fury. eventually, the noise dies down, and all she hears after are the muted shots from deacon up above, cleaning up whatever’s left. he joins her on the bottom floor with a low whistle.

‘two birds, one stone. and i didn’t even have to break a sweat. nice job.’

‘who won?’ she asks with an effected lightness.

‘ferals. and they left quite a mess.’

they did. the front of the church is painted with blood, and whisper tries not to think about the symbolism behind it. ‘that’s that. and now we wait?’

deacon looks to the front window of the church and the small, unlit lantern sitting on the ledge. ‘and now we wait.’

-

sitting still. she is not good at sitting still.

‘we could clear the way?’ she asks. 

deacon shakes his head, leans back against the pew they’ve come to share - the only one not broken in half or covered in blood. ‘i have an idea of where we’re taking this one, but we can’t risk being seen.’

the sun creeps across the sky. an affront to her, personally. she gets up to wander the church. deacon watches, still sprawled out on the pew. behind the pulpit at the head of the church is a burned book whose pages crumble to ash when she attempts to pick it up. toward the back, she climbs the winding staircase to a second floor, finding a small loft with sleeping bags laid out in a row. whisper pockets the handful of stimpaks and ammo she finds in a bag lying near one of the sleeping bags.

another door leads to the balcony overlooking the ground floor of the church, so she follows the staircase up to the steeple. at the very top, she only finds a single chair surrounded by empty bottles of alcohol and the bell missing its clapper.

‘find anything good?’ deacon asks when she finally heads back down.

‘ammo and stimpaks,’ she says, and divides them between the two of them. a glimmer of silver on the floor catches her eye. she tears off the ruined part of her sleeve and uses the fabric to pick up the silver bracelet lying half in a pool of feral blood.

it’s oddly, impossibly familiar. she rubs the blood off the other half of the bracelet, to reveal a name. rosa. like the name printed on the mailbox across from her house -

she drops it. coincidence, she tells herself. even if the ghoul is wearing the same pink dress from two hundred years ago.

defeated, she sits back down next to deacon. ‘weren’t we going to do each other’s hair?’

he chuckles. ‘only if you want me to shave your hair off.’

‘hm.’ she pokes his wig. ‘i don’t know if i’d look as good.’

‘i think this face pulls it off better than my others,’ he says, rubbing his chin.

‘your... others?’

‘i go under the knife every couple months. give myself a new face. extra security, you know?’

she squints. ‘extra security? you already have code names, secret codes, railsigns - what more security do you need?’

he’s silent for a moment, before he sighs. ‘you don’t have any family here.’ whisper stiffens. he continues. ‘you’re lucky. everyone else in the railroad - they’ve got to be extra careful. if the institute finds out who they are, they put their families at risk, not just themselves.’

lucky. she frowns. ‘i’ve never thought of it that way,’ she says, dully. after a moment, ‘you said ‘they.’ what about you?’

‘that,’ his near-trademark grin slides back onto his face with a snap, ‘is a story for another day.’

‘no trading of tragic backstories just yet then?’ she fakes a pout. ‘okay.’

the smile he gives her looks almost genuine.

-

it’s hours until their contact arrives and night falls. hours they spend playing a game on her pipboy that she found in her boredom. a small vault boy avatar bounces over mini-nukes traveling horizontally across the screen, all while travelling to the top of the screen to rescue vault girl from the titular red menace. whisper has to cross over to deacon’s left when it’s his turn to play. if she bobs her arm at an opportune moment (’what? my arm got tired.’), then it’s purely coincidence that he falls just short of her high score.

besides, it’s fair play for when he poked her in the side and distracted her when she was about to beat his.

‘well, i see you two agents are hard at work,’ stockton says, stepping over feral and raider corpses to enter the church.

‘we could have sung show tunes, but that might have drawn more attention,’ says deacon, drawing a quiet laugh out of a young man standing behind stockton, until now unnoticed.

deacon nudges her in the side, so she stands and walks up to the man. short cropped, messy hair hides under a news cap, and he shrinks into his too-big patchwork jacket. ‘this, agents, is h2-22. say hello, h2.’ stockton sounds as if he’s talking to a child.

‘h-hello,’ h2 mumbles, barely audible.

whisper smiles. ‘nice to meet you.’ a small smile breaks across his face, which he smothers soon after, looking to stockton.

‘they’ll take care of you from now on. i’m going to light the signal.’ the small flickering light of the lantern on the windowsill barely casts any shadows. stockton spares them a moment’s glance before he leaves. ‘take care.’

h2 waves, but it goes unseen to stockton’s retreating form.

‘so, now how long do we wait?’ whisper asks.

deacon speaks up behind her. ‘not long. he’s coming down the road now, actually.’

just over h2′s shoulder she watches someone jog their way, and soon another man stands in the entrance of the church in an outfit mirroring deacon’s. ‘deacon,’ he calls, breathless, ‘good to see you. still with the same face? it’s been months, man.’

deacon sidles up next to her. ‘hey, high rise. things have been crazy, you know, not enough time to go back to the surgery center.’

whisper looks between the two. ‘you were serious about the face changing?’

‘should have seen him back when he was a woman.’

she laughs. ‘wh-what? i missed that? deacon - ’

‘he-y. maybe beatrice will come back some day.’

whisper shakes her head. ‘anyway.’ she turns her attention back to high rise. ‘do you have a geiger counter?’

high rise smiles and nods. ‘there we are. mine is in the shop.’ he and deacon share a look. ‘so, you’re whisper, then? walked the freedom trail and everything?’

‘how fast does news travel in the commonwealth?’ she sighs. ‘but, yeah, that’s me.’

‘we’re all a bunch of gossips,’ deacon pipes up at her side.

‘something like that. stick with deacon. he’ll take care of you.’ before whisper can respond, high rise turns to the quiet young man standing just outside the group of agents. ‘speaking of taking care - how are you, friend? doing all right?’

h2 clears his throat softly. ‘y-yeah. the man who brought me here... said i shouldn’t talk too much.’

high rise’s smile is sad. ‘good advice.’ he returns his attention to the other agents. ‘we’re bringing him back to my safehouse, ticonderoga. only thing is: there’s a group of raiders between us and there. not to mention some super mutants have set up in the neighborhood.’

‘not a problem,’ whisper tells him.

‘you should have seen her earlier.’ deacon gestures to the cooling bodies on the ground. ‘all her.’

high rise finally seems to notice the bodies around them. ‘all right then. stay between us, okay?’ he says to h2. and to her and deacon, ‘let’s do this.’

[jakobwinter]

Character Task - Self Para

Trigger Warnings: Death

@atlanta-rpgextras

It had started out as just another ordinary day. Jakob woke up early, spent a couple of hours on his computer, putting together a code for a game he was trying to make online, then when his mom poked her head in to tell him she was making breakfast, he quickly got dressed for school and headed downstairs. It was his daily routine, one that he’d master over many years now. He was comfortable in his routine.

“How hungry are you this morning, honey?” Ava Winter asked her son, the warmest of smiles on her face, her shoulder length curls bouncing softly around her neck as she moved through the kitchen.

“Not very. I-- I had a snack when I woke up.” A twelve year old Jakob confessed, biting down on his bottom lip, a habit he had when he was nervous.

Shaking her head, Ava let out a sigh. “If you’re going to eat something that early, I hope it was at least something breakfast-like.”

Jakob was about to make another confession, one his mother most certainly wouldn’t approve of, when his father entered the kitchen. Dressed in a suit and tie, ready for a day at work, he placed kisses on top of his families heads as he breezed through the room. “Good morning, and goodbye. Jakey, if you want a ride to school, we gotta go now, kid. Grab your stuff.” He said before slipping out the back door.

Getting down from his spot at the counter, Jakob abandoned his breakfast and picked up his school bag. “I’ll see you after school!” He called out before following his dad outside to the car. It wasn’t until he was in the car and they were halfway down the street that he realised he hadn’t hugged his mom goodbye.

Once he was at school, there was a feeling in his gut that something wasn’t right. He put it down to his early morning snack of cookies and tried his best to ignore it.

It was just after lunch, he was in his english class, reading a book for an assignment that was due while pulling faces at Kasper who was sat next to him. When someone came in with a message for the teacher, Jakob quickly pretended to be fully focused on his book, his eyes glued to the page. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the teacher get to her feet and start walking in his direction. Looking over at Kasper, he pulled a face, figuring they were about to get in trouble, something that happened a little too often with those boys. “It wasn’t me, Kasper started, I swear.” Jakob leaped to defend himself. “Mr. Winter, you need to go to the office. Your grandparents are here to pick you up.”

Confusion crept over his features as he looked over at Kasper who’s face seemed to mirror his own. An unspoken promise to call later and fill the other in was made as Jakob packed up his things, slung his bag over his shoulder and left the classroom.

The walk to the office felt like it took ten times longer than usual, and when he got there, the feeling in his guts only got worse. There were looks on their faces that Jakob couldn’t describe. His eyebrows furrowed together as he walked over to them.

“What’s going on?” He asked, his voice quiet, as if he was afraid of the answer.

“Your, uh, your dad will explain when we get there.” His grandfather said, placing a gentle hand on his grandson’s shoulder.

His grandmother didn’t speak, but it almost looked as if she had been crying.

Confused, but quiet, Jakob followed his grandparents out to the car, wondering where they could be taking him.

The car ride felt like it went in slow motion, but as they pulled up to the hospital, Jakob finally spoke up. “What are we doing here?”

“Your dad is in there, he’ll explain.” His grandfather stated, looking at Jakob in the rearview mirror, his eyes glossing over with tears.

All of these non-answers were starting to frustrate the young boy, but he didn’t press further.

As the car was parked, the three of them got out and made their way inside. It was a maze of long white corridors, each one looking longer than the last. Finally, Jakob saw his father, he was sitting in a chair, his head in his hands.

Jakob bit down on his bottom lip as he slowly walked over to his dad. “Dad? What’s going on? Where’s Mom?” He asked, his voice so small.

Lukas Winter looked up at his son when he heard his voice, his eyes puffy and red. The sight of Ava’s features mimicked on the boy’s face sending his head back into his hands again. But, only for a moment, only to give himself to strength to speak. Looking up at Jakob again, Lukas took a deep breath and sat forward a little, placing his hands on the young boy’s shoulders. “She’s.. uh.. she’s just in that room. But, Jakey, I’ve gotta tell you something. Your mom, she..” he trailed off, struggling to find the words.

“Dad, what is it? Where’s my mom?” Jakob’s voice shook. “Where is she? Tell me. Where’s my mom?” Panic was starting to set in, and his mind was starting to race, going over all the worst case scenarios. “Dad?”

“Come with me, Jakey.” Lukas got to his feet and took his son by the hand, leading him into the room they were sitting outside of.

Jakob’s heart was pounding in his chest, and he pulled his hand free. “Where is she?” He asked one more time, but he knew the answer. Tears welled in his eyes as he looked at his dad, waiting for him to say the words he knew in his heart were coming.

“She’s gone.”

There it was. She’s gone. The words echoed through his head, repeating over and over. His world started to collapse. The tears trickled down his cheeks as he looked at his dad, his whole body shaking. “She’s... gone?” His voice was just above a whisper, barely audible over the sounds of people walking past and buzzers being pushed in the surrounding rooms. “No, she can’t be. She’s can’t be! I didn’t hug her goodbye! She can’t be gone!” With each protest, his voice got a little louder, a little more desperate. It was like you could hear the boy’s heart breaking.

“I’m so, so sorry, Jakob. I’m so sorry.” Lukas tried his best to keep it together, but hearing his son’s voice, it was almost impossible. Falling to his knees, he pulled Jakob into a hug, silently sobbing on the boy’s shoulder.

Jakob stood there in silence, tears streaming down his face as he tried to work out how his mother, who had been perfectly find when he’d left for school only a few hours ago, was now gone.

A doctor came over to the small group and offered them somewhere more private to go. An empty room, too bright, too clean, too empty. Lukas couldn’t even look at Jakob, the doctor did his best to explain what had happened, an aneurysm that had ruptured, an a bunch of other words that Jakob didn’t understand. He stood there, watching the doctor speak, but not hearing any of the words he was saying. His whole body was numb and shaking.

All of the adults in the room where hugging each other, consoling each other, talking in hushed tones. Jakob fell to the ground, his legs no longer able to hold him up, causing his dad and grandparents to rush over to him. He started sobbing.

“I-- I didn’t get to say goodbye.”

[sodoyouknowbts]

Jungkook x Reader - Game On! (Eleven)

Summary: Jungkook was the boy you had always had a crush on but after an event that leaves you heartbroken and humiliated, you cut him from your life. However, years later your paths cross again and now an adult, you swear to not let him get the better of you.

Genre: Romance, drama,

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Author: Moxie

Chapter 11

Your mum hadn't messed around when it came to the renovation. Glancing around, you finally understood why it had taken as long as it did to be completed. Your eyes moved around the new lounge room, which she had widened by taking up a portion of the backyard. The walls, which had previously separated the lounge room, dining area and kitchen had all been knocked down, leaving the area feeling vast and open. It didn’t just stop there though. The entire house, as you had noted the minute you walked through the front door, had been re-done. The walls were re-painted, the carpets were ripped up and replaced with shiny new floorboards - the shade of warm oak - and the kitchen had also been upgraded; the sparkling new double bowl sink and electric stove top replacing what was previously there. 

When asked, your mother had merely shrugged her shoulders and said that "It was long overdue".

Thankfully, your room remained much the same, with the only difference being that you now had a fresh coat of paint on your walls, white instead of the previous yellow-cream colour. You had never paid much mind to the old colour, so this change didn’t bother you whatsoever. Everything else though, was just as you had left it, much to your relief. Although it did cross your mind for a second as to what the workers had thought of a woman having that many stuffed toys in their room. Then again, there was no way they would know how old you were so the embarrassment was short lived. 

You settled into your room and unpacked your bags. After your phone call with your mother things had moved along quickly. The next day you had packed your things and moved out of Jungkook's house. As you gathered the last of your things and glanced around at the empty bedroom, you felt a twinge of sorrow. Without your things scattered around it was as if you had never been there at all. Any trace of you had gone with your things. You found yourself wanting to leave behind a memento; proof that your time with Jungkook had happened and that you had been there. 

The thought had surprised you as much as it had scared you. The past few weeks with Jungkook had been a roller coaster. He was a tyrant and a brat, always rolling his eyes at you and telling you off for not cleaning up after yourself. But he wasn’t always cold. When he wasn’t determined to keep you away, he was kind and gentle. He made you laugh. Before you knew it, you had been looking forward to the nights he was home and you ate dinner together. Unconsciously, you had even started to watch your shows outside in the lounge room, just so you could be near him. 

When you had told Jungkook about the house being finished, he had been his usual self, still in whatever mood he was in but he had been gentlemanly enough to offer to drop you home. He even offered to carry your suitcase to the car but you had politely declined. The car ride had been relatively quiet, with you striking up a conversation every now and then again about the weather or the flow of traffic. His reaction wasn't what you had expected at all. You had thought that surely he would be relieved and even happy that you were moving out but instead he seemed quite pensive and dare you say it, moodier than usual. His responses were short and clipped and so you hadn't pushed him much after that. You didn't bother to hide your disappointment when he dropped you off with merely a polite goodbye and a promise to see each other at work. Clearly, whatever had gotten him into that mood had not been resolved. 

Looking around your room you were glad to be home. You had missed the familiarity of your house and everything in it. You also missed having access to your entire wardrobe. It was tough living out of a suitcase and you were just beginning to grow tired of wearing the same four outfits to work. Slipping into your pyjamas, you crawled into bed and pulled the covers up to your chin.

As you stared up at your ceiling, the same one you had been staring at for the last ten years, you wondered what Jungkook was doing at that moment. 

Probably throwing a celebration party.

--

Jungkook entered in his pass code and at the sound of the beep and the lock sliding open, he pushed open the door to his apartment. He kicked off his gym sneakers and made his way through the apartment. He had purposely left the blinds open and the entire apartment was bathed in moonlight, streaming through from the wide floor-to-ceiling windows that took up an entire wall of his living room.

As he made his way down the hallway towards the kitchen, the down lights flickered to life, one by one. It was a handy system that he had paid a mint to install. It saved him the effort of having to turn on and off lights himself. He dumped his gym bag onto the kitchen counter top before proceeding to the fridge. It was completely silent except for the sound of his feet tapping lightly against the floorboards.

He stopped before the fridge and glanced at the note that you had written the day you had left. It was still there, even though it had been two days. For some reason Jungkook couldn't bring himself to throw it away.

You had written a simple message, complete with a smile face and a peace sign. Thank you for letting me stay Don't forget to relax and have fun every now and again!! And no, the gym doesn't count.

He smiled softly to himself as he read the last line again. You were such a dork sometimes.

Pulling open the fridge, Jungkook grabbed a water bottle and kicked it closed with his foot. As he unscrewed the cap, he slowly walked over to the couch in the living room and sat down, propping his feet up onto the ottoman. Bringing the water bottle to his lips, he took a sip and stared outside at the kaleidoscope of lights from the buildings and street lights, illuminating the night sky.The view of the city was one of the main reasons that he had purchased the apartment.

It was peaceful and except for the sound of a car horn every now and again, relatively quiet. It was just how he liked it. Silent. Except for some reason, the peace and quiet that he once found comforting ,now felt suffocating. He missed the sound of the television being on and the sound of whatever movie or show you were watching filling up the apartment.

Leaning his head back, so that it rested on the edge of the couch, Jungkook closed his eyes and let our an exasperated sigh. What the hell am I thinking?

--

Three and a half years ago

Jungkook's foot caught onto something and he stumbled as he walked through his front door. He glanced down and found a pair of heels thrown haphazardly in front of the door, right in front of his path. He sighed in defeat and shook his head, a fond smile on his lips, as he bent down and straightened them, lining them up by the wall along with the other shoes and slippers. It was a terrible habit that no matter how times she tried, she just couldn't seem to shake.

With his path free, Jungkook slipped off his own shoes. As he entered the house, he slipped off his navy blue blazer and his grey tie. Draping them over a kitchen stool he glanced around the house. Faintly, he heard the sound of music filtering through the walls, coming from the workshop. A love song. His smile grew as he quietly followed the soft melody, the music growing louder as he got closer.

As he opened the door and glanced around the "workshop" or more accurately the room where she worked and painted, he took in all the vast colours and pictures, spread across multiple canvases, each one a different size from the other. His eyes stopped in the middle of the room where she sat, just as she usually did. Her back was turned to him and she was sitting in front of an easel, her clothes covered by an apron that was once white but was now decorated in various splatters of paint. He watched as she tilted her head, staring at the canvas, the way she did when she was trying to envision something and then she dipped her brush into her paint.

Jungkook loved to watch her paint. It was the first thing about her that he had fallen in love with and the first thing that had captured his eye.

"How long are you going to stare at me for?"

Her voice carried over the music and Jungkook smiled unabashedly at having been caught staring. He pushed himself away from the door-frame and walked towards her. His steps lazy. "How long have you known I was there?". He asked.

"You know you can never sneak up on me" she smiled, dipping her paintbrush into another colour. "Even when we were little, you never could".

Jungkook wrapped his arms around her shoulders, feeling her soft and silky skin. He crouched down and placed a kiss on the top of her head, inhaling the scent of her shampoo. Apples. He loved the smell of apples. "It always used to annoy me how you always saw me coming. I could never scare you".

At Jungkook’s touch, she stopped painting and placed the paintbrush down. She turned in her seat and lifted her head up to face him. "Your back early. How was work?".

He pressed a soft kiss to her lips, feeling her smile grow. "Work was work. Mother is a tyrant as always. But I've been given the green light. The board is going to step down and starting tomorrow I’m going manager the company all on my own".

"That's great news, congratulations! God knows you deserve it, you’ve worked so hard to get this company to where it is now". She clapped her hands together in excitement and stood up. “There’s no way they could have done it without you”.

Jungkook's hands slid down from her shoulders and made their way to her waist. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her closer towards him. "This also means I'll have to start staying back and work longer hours. I hope you don't mind?".

She chuckled softly and rose to the tops of her toes, brushing her lips against his in a teasing kiss. "I don't mind as long as my fiance comes home to me each night".

"I'll always come home to you". His brought his lips back down to hers and deepened the kiss.

--

Jungkook jerked awake suddenly. He sat up slowly and glanced around, trying to get a hold of his bearings. He was in the lounge room, still in his gym clothes, the bottle of water forgotten by his side where it must have fallen from his grasp when he dozed off. Leaning forward, he propped his elbows onto his knees and exhaled deeply. He dropped his head forward into his hands and swore under his breath.

Mina.

He hadn't thought of Mina in a while. The dream had seemed so vivid and had felt so real that it was almost as if he had gone back in time. Shit. The last thing he wanted to do was to start having flashbacks of the past. Clearly, being around you was having an affect on him.

Fuck.

He had to stay away.

--

You stood in line at the coffee shop across from work and waited until it was your time to order. While you waited, you glanced hungrily at the selection of cakes and muffins in the display case. They looked delicious and it was incredibly tempting but you remained strong. You and your work friend were on a sugar cleanse for the week. his latest diet craze and so far, you were hanging in there. Even if it was only by a thread.

You let out a sleepy yawn and quickly bring you hand up to cover your mouth. Last night had been tough. Your neighbours had recently gotten a dog and it had spent the entire night fighting with the other neighbour's dog. All night, you had been kept awake by the sounds of loud barking. By the time you had managed to drift off you guessed that it would've been close to two AM. As a result, you had been struggling to stay awake all morning and your eyes refused to stay open. Your eyelids felt as though they weighed a tonne and it seemed as though you had spend more effort trying to stay awake than actually doing any work.

You give in to their heavy weight and close your eyes just for a second, resting them. It must have been more than a second because the next minute someone was clearing their throat.

"The line is moving".

Your eyes jerk open at the sound of the voice and sure enough when you look ahead of you, the line has progressed and there's now a large gap between you and the person before you. You quickly step forward. You turn around to thank the person behind you and find that it is Manager Won. He flashes you a grin and you smile back politely, praying that he doesn't try to strike up a conversation with you.

You still haven't managed to shake off your apprehension towards him and after what happened last time in the meeting room, you made it a point to avoid him and not initiate any conversation. Of course, you were still polite and responded whenever he spoke to you, however you made sure to keep the conversations as brief as possible and strictly about business.

His smile grow and his eyes scan your appearance, noting the bags underneath your eyes. "Late night?". You don't miss the way his eyes linger on your bare legs, giving you the creeps.

With an expression of perfect politeness, you nod your head in affirmation. "Yeah, I didn't get much sleep last night, unfortunately". You purposely make your response close ended. Short and sweet. If you were lucky then the conversation will naturally die with your response.

Unfortunately for you, it appears that Manager Won is in a talkative mood today. He nods his head sympathetically. "You poor thing. You look exhausted" he coos. To accompany his words, he lifts his right hand up to your neck and curls it around the back of your neck. The moment his hand wraps around your neck and you feel the tips of his fingers slip underneath the collar of your blouse, every alarm bell in your head goes off. Your entire body tenses up at the intrusion and every cell in your body stands up in alert. Okay, this isn't good. You fight the wave of revulsion and barely manage to keep it from showing on your face.

You're a better actress than you think because Manager Won appears to be completely unaware of your response. He proceeds to moves his fingers into circular motions, massaging the back of your neck as if it is the most natural thing to do between a manager and their staff.

"You're so tense" He comments. "I can feel all your knots". His voice is sickly sweet to your ears and it makes your stomach churn.

His touch feels cold and slimy on your skin and you immediately shift away to the side. The movement is slight but it works in removing his hand. At the same time, the line moves and you're finally second in line to be served. You take this opportunity to step away from him and place some distance between the two of you.

Everything in you is screaming at you to get away but your need for caffeine is greater and you know that there's no way you were going to survive the rest of the day without a coffee. Add to that, the stubborn side of you refused to leave, especially since you’ve waited in line until now.

You decide to change the subject and steer it towards something safe, not liking the current vibe. "The weather is nice today" you comment, nodding towards the open windows of the cafe. The weather had cooled down noticeably, a much welcomed reprieve from the heat that had lingered around for the past week. It was still relatively warm but you no longer had to worry about your shirt sticking to your back or sitting on the edge of the chair so that your thighs don't stick and leave behind a dreaded sweat patch. It baffled you how Jungkook managed to survive in his suits. Sure the office was nice and cool, thanks to the air conditioning but outside was a different matter. The man is a freak.

Your attempts at changing the subject and getting things back to a professional level fall on deaf ears. Manager Won takes your comment as a cue to stare at your skirt. It's a modest, knee length pencil skirt but the way his eyes were looking at you so intently, you might as well have been wearing a mini skirt. You discretely move your bag so that it falls in front of you. It didn't work to cover your legs but it made you feel better having a barrier between the two of you.

Manager Won makes an appreciative sound in the back of his throat. "Yes it has cooled down, but I'm glad it's still skirt weather. You always look so nice and pretty in skirts. It shows off your pretty legs".

You force a small smile at his remark, feeling incredibly uncomfortable. "Thank you" you reply back politely, even though the comment makes you want to cringe. You make a mental note to stop wearing skirts from tomorrow on wards. 

I don't care how hot it is. This is getting ridiculous and out of hand. You think to yourself.

Thankfully, you're saved from further unease when the person in front of you places their order and leaves with a muffin. You send a quick "see you back at the office" to Manager Won and turn away before he can respond, half-running to the counter, anxious to get away from him.

--

By the time you had made it back to your desk, your mind was made up. You were going to do something about Manager Won. The more you had thought about it on the walk back to the office, the more you realised that what he was doing was not acceptable. You had initially brushed off his attention, thinking that they were accidents and that they were harmless but as time passed, he still hadn't let up and it was becoming more and more apparent that he wasn’t planning to stop.

You waited until it was almost the end of the day before you walked up to the see the human resource officer, whose office just happened to be on the same level as Jungkook's. You had spent the rest of the afternoon combing through the company manual and reading the codes of conduct. Whilst it didn't provide a clear outline of what constitutes sexual harassment, you figured that someone making unwanted remarks counted.

As your rode the elevator, you went over again in your head what you were going to say. You weren't planning on filing a report, that much you were sure of. As much as Manager Won made you feel uncomfortable and gave you the creeps, he hadn't done anything to make you feel scared or worried. All in all, you just wanted his comments to stop. Unfortunately though, you weren't sure of what to say to him so you figured that the best thing to do is speak with the Human resource manager and get their ideas.

Once the elevator arrived, you walked out and headed directly towards their office. With each step your heart sped up and your nerves wavered. On your way there you glance towards Jungkook's office. His door is closed, to your disappointment, so you can't see him. However you do make eye contact with his secretary, so you give them a wave with they reciprocate with a friendly smile.

With sweaty palms, you approach the HR officer's room and even though the door is slightly ajar, you raise your fist and knock. Two swift raps of your knuckles. You have only met the HR officer once and that was on the day of your orientation when Manager Choi had shown you around the office. You had been introduced to an extremely tall woman who towered over you and if you had to guess, looked to be in her mid thirties. She had an ordinary face and her hair was cut into a stylish bob and dyed a striking shade of platinum blonde.

"Oh hello there!" She greets cheerfully, looking up from whatever she had been reading. "This is a pleasant surprise. Please come in. Take a seat". She gestures to one of the two chairs facing her table and you gratefully sit down. Once you're settled she folds her hands in front of her on the desk and smiles. "What brings you down to HR? Is everything alright?"

You had rehearsed your words on the entire way up here however now when it's the moment of truth you couldn't, for the life of you, remember what is was that you were going to say. Taking in a deep breath, you decide to dive straight in.

"Everything’s fine, I'm just curious about something" you start. Your voice cracks and you swallow, mustering up your courage. Your hands feel unbearably sweaty and you nervously wipe them on your skirt. "If...say for example, just hypothetically...um there's someone, a male, who sometimes says things that make me feel sort of...um uncomfortable, is there anything I can do about it?. Oh but I don't want to like report it or anything. I mean it's nothing serious" you quickly add sensing the mood in the room shift. 

“Well...” She says, leaning forward onto her forearms. Her voice is serious but it doesn't loose it’s friendly tone. “If that were the case, hypothetically, then this is the best place to go to. In this company we have a zero tolerance for prejudice or marginalisation of any kind and we believe that everyone should be treated equal and that no one should feel unsafe. This is after all, where you spend five days out of every week, eight hours a day”. Her expression makes it clear that she doesn’t believe that you’re asking purely out of curiously.

She senses your hesitation and continues talking. “If, by some unfortunate circumstance, someone feels that they are receiving unwanted attention, the first thing that would happen is that I would sit down with that person and explain to them how the other party is feeling. However if the behavior continues despite this, it will then be escalated and a meeting will be organised between myself, as the mediator and the parties involved. In the end though, it’s my priority to make sure everyone feels as though they are working in a safe environment”.

There’s something about the way she talks that makes you feel as though you can open up to her. Maybe it’s her eyes or her kind smile? Either way before you realise what you’re doing, your mouth is already forming the words. “It’s probably nothing but sometimes...I don’t know...sometimes Manager Won makes me feel...not very comfortable”. You try to string your thoughts into a coherent sentence. You hesitate after mentioning Manager Won’s name and glance up to try and gage her reaction but her face remains the same. Her smile never wavering.

“Go on, it’s okay. This is a safe zone. What you say in here doesn’t leave this room” She reassures you gently. “How does he make you feel uncomfortable?”

You glance down at your hands in your lap. “Um..it might not be anything but sometimes he’ll stand really close to me. Like whenever he’s talking to me or something and other times he’ll touch me. Like his hand will brush my leg and stuff. Or he’ll say something slightly inappropriate. I don’t know” You shrug your shoulders. “Maybe I’m being silly. I mean this could probably all be a misunderstanding but I just thought that if I said something...” You raise your eyes.

“You’re not being silly” she replies. “Of course I will do everything to help you. You did the right thing coming to see me”.

Already it feels as though a weight has been lifted off your shoulders. You hadn’t realised just how much this was weighing on your mind until now. “Thank you so much for listening to me”. You push your chair back and stand up. Before you turn to leave you stop and turn back around to face her. “I don’t want Manager Won to get into trouble or anything. I mean I don’t want to make a report or anything, I would just like it to stop and I’m not sure how to go about it” You clarify. 

She nods her head in understanding. “Of course, I completely understand. Don’t worry, leave this with me”.

You smile in gratitude and turn to leave. 

--

The next day at work, you’re a bundle of nerves. You had felt relieved after your talk with the HR officer however on the ride home you had begun to worry. What if you had done the wrong thing? What if you had only managed to make the situation worse?. The entire day you’re on edge, jumping at the slightest noise and movement. Every time someone called out your name, you half expected it to be Manager Won. However by the end of the day and with zero incidents with Manager Won, you realise that it’s just your mind overreacting. 

--

The next day goes by much the time.

--

By Friday, your mood has lifted and for the first time since the talk, you feel like you can breathe again. You had run into Manger Won twice and both times he was polite. Not once did he do anything inappropriate and it seemed that the HR officer handled the situation, just as she said she would. 

 “What are you smiling about?” Your work friend asks you, seeing the way you were smiling at your computer screen. 

“Nothing” You shake your head and change the subject. “So, do you have any plans for the weekend?”

Your friend looks seemingly unconvinced at your change of subject but he lets you off. “Not much” He shrugs. “I’ve got a friend’s birthday party tomorrow, so we’re going out for dinner. Other than that, nothing. What about yourself?”

“I’ve got a hot date with Netflix and a tub of ice cream. I’m going to laze all day on my couch”. 

“Nice, sounds fun. I’m jealous”. Your friend jokes. He shuts down his computer and stands up, stretching his arms above his head. “You ready to go now?”

You glance around the office and note that except for the two of you and Manager Won, every one has already gone home for the day. It was about thirty minutes past six and since it’s Friday, most of the department had gone out for Friday drinks. You and your friend had decided to stay back. You, wanting to finish all your work and your friend, not feeling in the mood for drinking. 

“Yep, ready”. You shut down your computer and bend down to reach for your bag. “Let’s get out of here”

On your way out Manager Won pops his head out of his office and stops the both of you. “Oh great, you’re still here” He addresses you. “Would I be able to grab you for a quick second? I just want to go over something”.

For a split second, a sense of apprehension grips you but it quickly goes away. He probably wants to talk about the latest report. You calm yourself down. “Yeah, sure no problem” you reply and turn to your friend. “You should probably go on ahead. I’ll see you on Monday?”.

“Okay, yeah, I’ll see you on Monday. Bye” He waves goodbye to you and then to Manager Won. “Bye sir, see you on Monday”.

“See you on Monday”. Manager Won nods his head and bids your friend goodbye. Once your friend has left you turn around to Manager Won who has a hand on his door, holding it open for you.

“So, what did you need to talk to me about?” you ask, as you walk into his office and glance back.

You watch as he shuts the door to his office and for some reason, the sense of apprehension returns to you. Usually he kept the door to his office open, unless it was extremely noisy outside or if he was discussing important business. Your heart clenches and your pulse starts to race. Your eyes shift from him to the door. There’s no reason for him to close the door now, especially since there’s only the two of you in the office. Unless...

“Is everything alright, sir?”. The question comes out as little more than a whisper.

“No, I don’t believe everything is alright” he mutters coldly. The sound sends a chill down your spine. You had never heard him use this tone before and it made the hairs on the back of your neck stand. Slowly he turns around and faces you. The moment you see his face, your stomach drops. All the humour and friendliness in his face has disappeared, replaced instead by a harshness. He stares at you with an expression that is almost cruel and feral and fear settles over you. This isn’t the Manager Won that you know.

This is a man who scares you.

“You’ve been busy now haven’t you?” He sneers disdainfully.

To Be Continued.

[ladystylestores]

My trip to Lanzarote, Canary Island, Spain – Travel in Covid-19 Times

I’ve just returned from a trip to Lanzarote, an island located on the Canary Islands of Spain. 

After self-isolation in Llandudno, North Wales for three months due to coronavirus, COVID-19, I was ready to travel again once it was safe to do so.    On Monday 6th of July, the Welsh Government lifted the 5-mile stay local rule, and I could finally travel outside of my local community again.    At this point, I would like to highlight that everything mentioned within this blog post is based on my personal experience, and you should seek government advice from the correct sources.    The reason why I mention this is because the rules are changing all the time and I wanted to share how my trip went to help paint a picture of what your trip could be like so you can make an informed opinion on if you should travel at the moment.   

Why did I choose Lanzarote, Canary Islands  

At my time of flying, Spain was on the list of countries you could fly to from the UK without the need to isolate for two weeks after returning from your trip.    Of course, this could change, but this was one of the reasons why I choose Spain.    I didn’t fancy flying to a Spanish city due to crowds, but Lanzarote, one of the Canary Islands has direct flights from the UK and felt like a better option due to the current situation.    Plus the sound of the stunning volcanic landscape, hiking trails, sunny sandy beaches and locally sourced food all tempted me to visit the island of Lanzarote. It was just what I was looking for after being at home for so long.    With my bags packed and passport in hand (don’t forget your passport, it’s been a while!) I was ready to travel and explore the Canary Islands.    Around Lanzarote, not all businesses were open for tourism as visitor numbers are still operating on low capacity.   However, businesses are slowly opening up again for tourism, and many restaurants, visitor attractions, rental cars and a select number of resorts were open for visitors on the island.   

You should book travel insurance before you travel around Europe

Please make sure you arrange suitable travel insurance for your trip before you depart. Some travel insurance providers have changed their policy to adapt to coronavirus COVID-19 so please read the small print and make sure that you have a cover.    Proper guidance is to check the Foreign and Commonwealth Office (FCO) website for up to date travel advice for UK travellers, and typically your travel insurance will follow along the lines of the FCO. So, if the FCO says not to travel, then your travel insurance usually is not valid, so please check the FCO website frequently for the latest travel advice.    Also, for those within the EU, make sure that your E111 card is up to date before you depart. For those within the UK, you can still travel and use your E111 card until the end of December. Remember that the E111 doesn’t replace travel insurance, but it’s good to have it with you at all times when travelling around the EU, especially at the moment.   

Do you have to wear a face mask in Spain at all times? 

Do you have to wear a mask all the time? This was a question I had before travelling to Lanzarote.    Of course, this advice will differ from other countries in Europe. But in Spain and on the Canary Islands, the simple answer is yes. You do have to wear your mask at all times.    After gathering some local advice, wearing a mask is not only to protect yourself from spreading germs but as a courtesy to protecting others.    Any situation where you’re unable to keep your social distance is when you should wear your mask in Spain.    This would be any place where social distancing is challenging, such as within shops, restaurants and public transport.    You can remove your mask when you sit down to eat or have a drink. You can withdraw your face cover while on the beach or when going for a swim in Spain, as long as you can keep your social distance.    Within your hotel room or rental car, you can remove your mask. If you’re going to the hotel breakfast buffet, you should wear your face mask.    I hope the above information clears up some questions you might have.   

What is it like to fly at the moment? 

It was a bizarre feeling only seeing five flights on the departure board of Heathrow terminal 5, usually the busiest airport in Europe. It did come as a shock.    Heathrow felt like a ghost town with limited passenger numbers flying on the day.    Throughout Heathrow, you will have to wear a facemask at all times from the entrance until you’ve exited at your arrival destination. It’s advised to swap your face mask every few hours, so you should pack a selection to use throughout your travels.    My temperature was checked as I entered Heathrow airport and I found hand sanitizer located all around the airport.    Check-in was rather swift, and many airlines are allowing free baggage check-in to free up space in the cabin, which is worth taking advantage of.    Security has never felt so fast; it was a swift experience and didn’t take much time at all.    Once airside, in regard to places to eat, I could only find one Pret open, which was enough to grab a coffee and a bite to eat before the flight.    Most airlines are not allowing food and drink service at the moment.    I did notice that a passenger requested a cup of water which was allowed but generally, nothing will be served on the flight unless you’re travelling business.    At the boarding gate, passengers were boarding individually based on row numbers, starting from the back of the aircraft towards the front.    At the check-in desk, the staff said to allow an extra hour due to additional boarding time. Be patient as it will take more time to board the flight, but you could always book your seat at the back if you wish to board sooner.    Once on the flight, cabin crew informed us that the aircraft used an advanced air flow filtration system that kills most germs. This, combined with a face mask and limited contact, helps to reduce the risk.    Once I was at my seat, I noticed that the airline had used empty seats to keep travellers at a safe distance from each other as best as they could.    They also blocked off and limited access to the number of toilets you could use. You can still use them but not as many so you might have to wait.    Generally, I found the flying experience rather relaxing and pleasant, indeed longer than usual, but the additional steps gave me reassurance rather than worry.    I wouldn’t want to take a flight with a connection due to the extra time it takes to board and go through the airport, but one direct flight wouldn’t be an issue.   

What was your hotel resort like in Lanzarote?  

I stayed at the Sands Beach resort located in Costa Teguise on the island of Lanzarote.    They had self-catering options for families with a large selection of swimming pools to choose from, which was great for social distance swimming.    Swimming is one of the things I missed the most, so it was a much-welcomed joy to have a few laps in the pool each morning.    The breakfast buffet was open, and you had to order each item individually. This will take some additional time, so be sure to arrive early to allow your choices to be accommodated.    I would visit the local supermarket and stock up on breakfast items to make in your room so you can relax in the morning and take the stress out of breakfast.    Not all resorts are open yet in Lanzarote, and some have chosen to stay closed until September so your choices will be limited.    The Sands Beach Resort chose to open early to learn about the extra steps needed to open up. The Spanish government have issued rules that resorts must follow to remain open to meet the health guidelines and create a safe environment for guests.    Another issue is staff. The resort is running at low capacity and it’s been tough getting the team back to work as some have chosen to wait until it’s safer to return to work while others are happy to get back to work again.    Rooms are required to undergo additional cleaning after each guest which is why I would recommend staying for 1-2 weeks.    Also, the stock has been an issue as the supply chain for resorts has not been open on the island since lockdown and resorts are having to use supermarkets to purchase items they need to operate.    It will take some time for resorts to open up again but those that have chosen to open up as soon as possible will learn from the experience and adapt to the guidelines, which will take time for some resorts to adjust to.   

What is it like going to a restaurant on the Canary Islands?

After cooking for myself for three months, I’ve simply run out of hot pot recipes and I’m also getting a bit bored of baking banana bread.    Being allowed to visit restaurants again and not have to do the washing up was one of the most enjoyable moments from the trip.    Getting to taste the local flavours again was an absolute pleasure. Enjoying fresh seafood and a glass of white wine that’s made on the island was pure joy.    If you wish to dine out, it’s best to call in advance to book a table as space within the premise is limited due to schedules and social distance.    I noticed that temperature checks took place before entering the restaurant, and hand sanitizer was always found at the entrance.    You must wear a facemask until you have taken a seat at your table, then you can take it off to enjoy your food and drink.    Also, I noticed that the menu could typically be found by using a QR code to access on your smartphone. Make sure you have your Roam Like at Home data turned on while travelling around the EU as it will come in handy.    If you can pay for your meal by using contactless payment, this would be the best method rather than using cash.   

Do you need to fill out health forms before you travel?

Spain requires you to fill in a health form before you arrive. Once the form is completed online, you will get a QR code which will be scanned on arrival.   You must be checked into your flight and have your seat number before you fill out the form. This information helps with track and trace, and you will be contacted if needed.    Also, when returning to the UK, you must fill in a form explaining where you’ve been and where you will be going to in the UK.   After filling in the UK form and placing my address in Wales where I will be, I instantly got an email from the Welsh government asking me to quarantine and stay at home for two weeks. I was not aware that the rules in Wales required two weeks quarantine, but not a problem as I have been home for the past two weeks and will follow the guidelines as instructed. Something to think about as I was also aware that those from Scotland had been advised not to travel to Spain altogether. So, the rules are different depending on where you live.   

Did I enjoy my trip to Lanzarote, Canary Islands? 

The most important question. Did I have a great time going to Lanzarote? Were all the extra steps worth it?    My answer is for the most part yes. I do have mixed opinions about it though, as I enjoyed the trip, but travel is no longer normal like it used to be and some fun has been sucked out the experience.    But I do understand that this is for my own and others’ safety to allow tourism to open up again so I would say that it was worth it.    My issue was the length of the trip; I wish I could have stayed longer to justify the extra time you need to go through all the additional safety steps.    So, If I were staying in Lanzarote for two weeks, I would have said that it was worth it.   

My advice at the moment to make travel safer during COVID-19 

I would recommend only taking one direct flight to reach your destination. Avoid having to take connection flights as this increases your risk of a possible infection.    Stay in one resort and try to find a self-catering option so you can prepare breakfast and lunch from your room as buffets are not a safe environment at the moment.    Book ahead to reserve your table if you wish to dine out at a local restaurant.    Book a rental car to explore your surroundings and avoid public transport.    Use contactless payment and avoid cash when possible.    Stay for 1-2 weeks. Travel to your destination will take more time so you should allocate this time into your holiday to make it more rewarding.    Don’t forget to relax and enjoy your holiday. You will have to go through many additional steps to make your holiday safe so please have patience, remain calm and take your time.   For this reason, a weekend city escape might not be ideal at the moment as you won’t have enough time to enjoy the actual holiday.   

Thank you for reading my blog post about my trip to Lanzarote  

I hope all the above information helps you understand what travel and tourism are currently like in Europe at this moment in time, and I wish you a pleasant future trip!     This blog post was put together in collaboration with the UNWTO and the Canary Islands as part of the #RestartTourism campaign to help tourism recovery on the islands. I hope you’ve found this blog post informative.   Travel tip shared by Dave  

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[gaiatheorist]

“Does it spark joy?”

2.30am on a Sunday morning, and I’ve read yet another article on Marie Kondo. I’m coming unravelled again, and setting myself distraction-tasks, to avoid plummeting into one of my rabbit-holes. They’re holding strategies, last year I had the garden, this year, I have the house and the garden. I’ll grow some of my own food, because the UK unemployment benefit doesn’t leave any leeway for anything but bills. (I’m lucky, I ‘Won the Golden Ticket’ of an award of disability benefit, it’s highly probable that it will be declined when it comes to renewal in less than a year, despite my brain injuries being permanent.) I ‘caught’ myself moving things around a few days ago, it’s one of my anxiety-behaviours, I don’t have very much control about the external-world, so I focus on what I can control. 

Moving things around. Do I want/need ‘that’? Is it of any practical use now, or am I just holding on to it for sentimental reasons? (There’s very little here that isn’t of practical use, I don’t really ‘keep things’, and I do have regular periods of purging what’s left.) There’s no ‘sparking joy’, just an awful lot of irritability. My strange friend Creepy Carpet Tile Man visited recently, and pointed to various ‘things’, saying “Why don’t you put that on eBay?” “It’s not mine.” “Surely it is now? He’s been gone long enough, doesn’t it become legally yours after all these years?” My loft is full of the ex’s ‘stuff’, and I can’t use my garden shed, because that’s packed with his belongings as well. I hate being ‘tethered’ to him, I’m sick of asking him to take things away, and him ‘forgetting’, or ‘having something on’, he’s unreliable, he always was. I’m also cautious of snapping at him in front of our son, so this is, in part, a situation of my own making. The ex is doing what he always did, “Leave something long enough and someone else will sort it.”, he’s ‘not the most useful arrangement of molecules’, as the kid once described him. 

The practical thing for me to do would be to tell the ex again that I want his various stuff gone. I don’t want to be responsible for it, I have enough difficulty being responsible for myself some days. He doesn’t have the time, or the storage space, his parents aren’t well, and our son is in the final year of his degree. ‘Never a good time’ again. I’m angry at him for being generally inept, and I’m frustrated with myself for absorbing the emotional load again. I am not responsible for him, and I’m stuck in a loop of all the times he’d tantrum “I’m not happy!”, projecting his own inadequacies onto me, making himself the centre of the universe, and blaming me for not being what he wanted. I never really was, he wanted a compliant house-mouse who would bend over backwards to serve her Lord and Master, I’m not that. He wanted me to be an extension of him, and I’m a distinct entity, like Peter Pan’s shadow, I made the separation, but I’m still scrubbing away his stains, three years on.

That’s not a metaphor, I am literally scrubbing away stains. As well as being inept and egocentric, he was dirty. The lettings agents inspect the property every six months, when he was here, that would lead to me dousing the house in Febreeze and bleach on the morning of the inspection, after he’d gone to work. Housework was ‘my’ responsibility, and, apart from hurriedly shoving piles of his own worn socks down the arm of the sofa when his Dad visited, he didn’t do anything. I allowed that to continue. He never once washed the dishes, or vacuumed, and if he spilled or dropped anything on the carpet, he’d either just leave it, or blot it with one of his socks. He expected undying gratitude for mowing the lawn, and once sulked for days because I didn’t praise him for cleaning the outside of the vacuum cleaner. (No, he didn’t use it, or even empty it, he cleaned the outside of it, the man’s a melon.) At the last inspection, I asked the agent if there was any action required on my part. “No, it’s just the cleanliness again.” “Pardon?” “Well, your carpets and that, we know some of the stains were here when you moved in.” ‘Some’ of them, the rest were the ex, and his rancid dog. 

I can’t remember when we bought the Vax carpet-cleaning machine, it’s not really something I’d have marked on the calendar, but it most probably was in response to a spill of some description, and it probably wasn’t me that spilled it. (I am incredibly clumsy, more so since the brain injuries, but if I spill something, I clean it up straight away, so it doesn’t set as a stain.) The Vax worked the first time I used it, and then the second time I tried, there was no suction. The ex said he’d look at it, but it wasn’t a motorbike, or pornography, or a YouTube video of UFO conspiracies, so he didn’t look at it. For years, the lettings agents would ask me to address the stains on the carpets, and I’d end up on my hands and knees, with a bucket and a scrubbing brush, because the Vax was ‘broken.’ One year, after I’d blistered my hands really badly attempting to scrub the carpet, he hired an industrial carpet cleaning machine for me to use, then berated me for not using it properly, and leaving streaks on the carpet. The machine was faulty, he said he’d ask for a replacement, but that never happened, he ‘forgot.’ 

The Vax wasn’t ‘broken’, it was clogged. Dog-hair, and dirt, and grit had obstructed the inlet to the vacuum, and dried in position. Unclogging it would have been more pleasant if the machine hadn’t evidently sucked dog-urine out of the carpets. His dog pissed on everything, and he said he couldn’t smell it. I could. Apart from the constant-stink, wet carpet has a tendency to absorb more dirt, between the allotment, and the ex working in engineering, there was plenty of dirt. (Also lots of sand and grit, he had a tendency to dump fishing and camping gear on the carpet, “I’ll shift that in a bit.”, then he’d assume his position on the sofa, dropping yet more crumbs from toast and crisps.) 

“It was just the way he was raised.” was my old excuse for his behaviour. His family had a very traditional-patriarchal structure, the men went out to work, and the women had ‘little jobs’, and assumed responsibility for all of the housework. That was his ‘normal’, but not mine, my mother was an utter slattern, she worked full-time, she vacuumed once a week, and sporadically responded to my step-father’s desire for a basic degree of cleanliness by storming into my bedroom with a bin-liner, and a beating. Teaching me how-to-housework wasn’t on her agenda, I suppose I ought to thank her for not trying to shape me into some sort of Stepford Wife. Nobody taught the ex how-to-housework, either, when he split up with the girlfriend before me, the Mother-in-law took on his cleaning, laundry, and evening meals, lest his precious testicles fall clean off if he touched a duster. That stopped when he introduced me, and there was an assumption that I’d take over.

The first couple of months that we lived together were absolute chaos, I was working two jobs at the same time, so the house ended up looking like it had been rolled down a hill. The in-laws would ‘tut’ when they visited, and then the Mother-in-law straight-out ‘told’ me “You really need to Hoover every day, because of the dogs.” Me, not him. Some friends of his pointed out that I was ALWAYS washing dishes when they visited. I was. It wasn’t a house-proud thing, he’d always offer visitors coffee (which I was expected to make), and the mugs would all be dirty in the sink, because washing dishes wasn’t a routine thing. 

I’d moved in with him in the October, and in December, I became ill. ‘Viral illness’, which is doctor-code for “We’re not entirely sure, might clear up in time.” I’d changed jobs at the start of November, and was on a temporary ‘seasonal’ contract, which wasn’t renewed when my sick-note expired. I was unemployed, and really quite unwell, but I was ‘home all day’, and the ex quickly shifted from “I don’t expect to come home from work to find pots in the sink!” to “You need to get another job, or go.” Fine, whatever, being ‘kept’ was never going to suit me. A succession of menial factory jobs followed, frequently doubling-back, and staying for the ‘afters’ shift after doing the ‘days’ shift. Oh, look, the dishes are STILL in the sink. The company he was working for was having ‘financial difficulties’, and would ‘pay him next week’, so I kept accepting the double-backs, because it was only going to be a short-term thing. It wasn’t. The company went into administration, he was unemployed, and the dishes were still in the sink. 

He found another job, and we entered another period of clutter-and-chaos, kicking crap behind the sofa when the in-laws car pulled up outside. Their tutting and eye-rolling was never directed at him, their blue-eyed-boy wasn’t expected to cook or clean, he had a woman to do that for him. Except I didn’t. He’d have sporadic tantrums, usually directed at my books, or letter-writing, “I didn’t grow up in a scruffy house, YOU didn’t grow up in a scruffy house, why do you let it get like this?” Erm, I did grow up in a scruffy house, and a couple of books aren’t really the issue here. He denigrated the me-things, it wasn’t the physical presence of books, or writing paper, or bits of art-and-craft materials, it was the fact that while I was reading, or writing, or making things, my attention wasn’t on him. 

He’d occasionally decide he was going to clean up, but that usually lead to him emptying all of the videos out of the cabinet, dusting the shelves, and then deciding to watch a film, he really was rubbish. I started trying to play house, to please him, I had no idea what I was doing, literally, I shrunk his laundry, scorched his ironing, burned his dinner. Psychologically, I played right into his coercive control, we’d had the whirlwind romance, which had led to me excluding most of my friends, because he didn’t like them, and I didn’t want him to be angry with me. I didn’t like most of his friends, but I pushed the feelings, and their wandering hands away. I made myself less-than, back then, I idolised him, I had made him my ‘everything’, thrown myself into him, and this rabbit-hole precipice now is because I’m struggling to ‘find myself’. (Sick-bucket, please.) I spent 20 years walking on eggshells, trying not to upset him, more than half of that time, we’d accepted that the marriage was over, and I’d agreed to stay with him to avoid unsettling our son, or upsetting the Father-in-law. 

Ironically, the near-miss with my brain haemorrhage made me more aware of cleaning. My sense of smell is heightened, and I have constant visual disturbances, as well as a tendency to knock things over. Heaps and clutter are just accidents waiting to happen. More than that, nearly dying made me realise I wasn’t really living. There’s a tangent here, the ex’s mother died after a brain haemorrhage, I both didn’t-want-him, and didn’t want to be a constant reminder of his past-loss. I survived what killed his idol, she was the strongest woman he’d known, until he met me, and I really didn’t think it was fair on either of us to continue with the sham half-life. 

So, I’ll continue paring-down, throwing-out, and inventing new swear-words. Does the Vax machine that I’ve repaired with brute force, twisty-wire and duct tape ‘spark joy’? Of course it doesn’t. Does the fact that I’m finally managing to remove the stains he left from the carpet ‘spark joy’? Don’t be ridiculous, it’s physically painful, and every time I get the carpet wet, it re-activates the stench of dog-piss and engineering grease, I’m ploughing through my supplies of scented candles and wax melts at an alarming rate. I have a sense of achievement that I’ve managed to Womble-fix the Vax, and I know I’ll feel more content in myself after a couple more sessions of Vax-ing.

That was the point, I don’t do much in the way of ‘joy’, an old friend recently used ‘joy’ in a Facebook private message to me, and I shook my head. Looking for joy-and-only-joy is a futile existence, I’m not as miserable as the persona I project to the world, but humans aren’t designed to exist in a permanent state of ‘joy’ or ‘happiness’. It’s a fine aspiration to explore and embrace the truly wonderful, but it’s not a realistic expectation that everything-can-always-be-perfect. It can’t. These blogs are usually negative, it’s my way of purging, I do look for the positives in life, and there are many, but that Instagram-perfect isn’t me. I do false-front, I acknowledge that, but I refuse to buy-in to this something-saturation we’re bombarded with, I don’t need affirmation that I’m ‘enough’, I don’t need-to-be-needed, wanting-to-be-wanted is a different matter. 

I am ‘enough’, and I struggle with other-people pushing ‘happy’ as the norm. I’m content with I-don’t-hate-this, and accepting I-hate-this-now-but-it-will-be-done-soon.          

[dazzledbybooks]

Today Luna Kayne and Rockstar Book Tours are revealing the cover and an exclusive content for KILL CODE, the first book in her new Romantic Suspense Series which releases on January 22, 2019! Check out the awesome cover and enter the giveaway! On to the reveal!  Title: KILL CODE Author: Luna Kayne Pub. Date: January 22, 2019 Publisher: Kayne Publishing Formats: Paperback, eBook Pages: 317 Find it: Goodreads, Amazon, Amazon Canada HOW FAR WOULD YOU GO TO PROTECT THE ONES YOU LOVE?  THEN  Ten years ago, a covert government operation gone wrong separated Jack from Jessa, the girl he promised he would never leave.   NOW  Jack's special forces team receives a tip, leading them to a remote farmhouse in search of a group of hackers led by the elusive Zane who work for the same person he holds responsible for Jessa’s death, ten years earlier.  Past and present collide as what was once lost is now standing in front of him and appears to be working for the very evil he is trying to end.  But is everything as it seems as secrets begin to unravel and pieces are put back in their proper places?  And will the last missing piece, the answer to all of their problems, be found in time?  *** Due to some dark and explicit themes in this book, it is recommended for mature audiences only. *** * Kill Code is the first book in a trilogy. Exclusive Excerpt! Prologue: 10 years ago - Jack - “Wake up, Jack. We’re moving out. Your assignment is done.” My commanding officer barks his orders out, jolting me awake. I open my eyes and try to focus as the dawn barely lights the room around me. “What do you mean, done? Last night we were waiting on the search warrants. We had the whole family. It was going down... today.” Propping myself up on my elbows, I shake my head, trying to will myself to catch up. Going over the last few days in my head, this doesn’t make sense. I’ve been on the ground with my unit for months now working special ops undercover with local law enforcement on a federal level, collecting whatever evidence we could and rounding up witnesses. Everything finally began to snowball together three days ago. First one witness came forward, then a second, then the third came in with solid proof. With Port Thomas being a smaller city nestled near the coast in Oregon, law enforcement is always underfunded so they were thankful for the additional manpower, as long as we didn’t step on too many toes. We had our mission in place for today, but this wasn’t how it was supposed to go. “It blew up. Shit went down a few hours ago. Apparently, they knew we were coming. The Sparr family is gone. All of the evidence against them is now speculative. Four witnesses are dead. Another two are missing.” Then, as he opens his mouth, I see the hesitation in his eyes as his body physically braces for a fight. “Jack.” My commander starts then stops, carefully considering his words with a frustrating pause. “It’s Jessa. Both her and her brother’s bodies are missing.” “What do you mean, missing?” Then the weight of his words hits me. “Wait. What do you mean, bodies?” I bolt out of bed onto shaky legs as I feel my world begin to crumble piece by piece. He chose his words carefully. She isn’t missing. Her body is missing. “Her family was in a car accident just outside of town at the bridge. It looks like they went over the cliff. Her parents’ bodies were recovered from the ravine along with the car. We don’t know yet if it’s related but three other people from the company are dead as well. It was a quick job.” He glances around my area as I feel panic begin to flow through my veins. “Maybe Jessa and Travis weren’t in the car. Did you check their house?” I counter in a desperate attempt to think of something they haven’t yet. Thoughts quickly come to me. I just saw both Jessa and Travis yesterday. We were all talking about how fast our high school grad is coming up in a few months. For siblings, they are almost inseparable. Twins who look nothing alike but finished each others sentences at every turn. When I started this undercover op, six months ago, I never expected to meet someone like Jessa. I was just a kid myself at 23 and I was five years older than her and her brother. But I fit into their senior year in high school. No one knew my secret. Everything about Jessa just fit for me. And now they are both missing. “We’ve been to the house and the hospital. We retrieved the car an hour ago. The back side window was broken out from the inside. We found her school bag in the back seat. And before you ask, we already have over half the team in on the search. We’ve been working with the local guys and they have all of her information. We’re checking the river banks as well as the water. Anyone making it out will be found, unless…” His voice trails off in realization that he said too much, but I pick up where he left off. “Unless they got pulled under and sucked down the rapids.” I feel my empty stomach clench tight. His eyes stay locked on me as I pause to gather my thoughts then, without pretense, my body involuntarily spins to get dressed and go after Jessa and that’s when I notice them. Two men standing behind my commanding officer. “Look, Jack. We know you and Jessa became close but you need to let the team handle it. Finding her and her brother is their priority while we’re still here. Our mission still stands though and your orders are to pack up and let them do their job.” His attempt at pacifying me is beginning to speak to a part of me that I don’t want to show as the way he trivializes my feelings for her ignites my fight or flight reflexes. We didn’t become close. She was it. She was everything. She was mine and after the arrests were made, I was coming for her. I was going to come clean about everything. I was going to tell her I was undercover and older than she thought I was. I was going to ask her to forgive my secrets and I was going to tell her I loved her. Now she’s gone. About Luna: Luna Kayne is a multi-published author in the romance and erotica genres. Her creative works include novels, novelettes and a book of poetry and prose. Within the romance genre, her books and short stories are also listed under suspense, paranormal, BDSM and contemporary. The woman behind Luna Kayne’s pen name has been writing for online publications since 2005. She writes from her home on an acreage near Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada. Website |Twitter | Facebook | Instagram |Amazon Author Page | BookBub | Goodreads Giveaway Details: 3 winners will win an eBook of KILL CODE, International. a Rafflecopter giveaway

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[ladystylestores]

My trip to Lanzarote, Canary Island, Spain – Travel in Covid-19 Times

I’ve just returned from a trip to Lanzarote, an island located on the Canary Islands of Spain. 

After self-isolation in Llandudno, North Wales for three months due to coronavirus, COVID-19, I was ready to travel again once it was safe to do so.    On Monday 6th of July, the Welsh Government lifted the 5-mile stay local rule, and I could finally travel outside of my local community again.    At this point, I would like to highlight that everything mentioned within this blog post is based on my personal experience, and you should seek government advice from the correct sources.    The reason why I mention this is because the rules are changing all the time and I wanted to share how my trip went to help paint a picture of what your trip could be like so you can make an informed opinion on if you should travel at the moment.   

Why did I choose Lanzarote, Canary Islands  

At my time of flying, Spain was on the list of countries you could fly to from the UK without the need to isolate for two weeks after returning from your trip.    Of course, this could change, but this was one of the reasons why I choose Spain.    I didn’t fancy flying to a Spanish city due to crowds, but Lanzarote, one of the Canary Islands has direct flights from the UK and felt like a better option due to the current situation.    Plus the sound of the stunning volcanic landscape, hiking trails, sunny sandy beaches and locally sourced food all tempted me to visit the island of Lanzarote. It was just what I was looking for after being at home for so long.    With my bags packed and passport in hand (don’t forget your passport, it’s been a while!) I was ready to travel and explore the Canary Islands.    Around Lanzarote, not all businesses were open for tourism as visitor numbers are still operating on low capacity.   However, businesses are slowly opening up again for tourism, and many restaurants, visitor attractions, rental cars and a select number of resorts were open for visitors on the island.   

You should book travel insurance before you travel around Europe

Please make sure you arrange suitable travel insurance for your trip before you depart. Some travel insurance providers have changed their policy to adapt to coronavirus COVID-19 so please read the small print and make sure that you have a cover.    Proper guidance is to check the Foreign and Commonwealth Office (FCO) website for up to date travel advice for UK travellers, and typically your travel insurance will follow along the lines of the FCO. So, if the FCO says not to travel, then your travel insurance usually is not valid, so please check the FCO website frequently for the latest travel advice.    Also, for those within the EU, make sure that your E111 card is up to date before you depart. For those within the UK, you can still travel and use your E111 card until the end of December. Remember that the E111 doesn’t replace travel insurance, but it’s good to have it with you at all times when travelling around the EU, especially at the moment.   

Do you have to wear a face mask in Spain at all times? 

Do you have to wear a mask all the time? This was a question I had before travelling to Lanzarote.    Of course, this advice will differ from other countries in Europe. But in Spain and on the Canary Islands, the simple answer is yes. You do have to wear your mask at all times.    After gathering some local advice, wearing a mask is not only to protect yourself from spreading germs but as a courtesy to protecting others.    Any situation where you’re unable to keep your social distance is when you should wear your mask in Spain.    This would be any place where social distancing is challenging, such as within shops, restaurants and public transport.    You can remove your mask when you sit down to eat or have a drink. You can withdraw your face cover while on the beach or when going for a swim in Spain, as long as you can keep your social distance.    Within your hotel room or rental car, you can remove your mask. If you’re going to the hotel breakfast buffet, you should wear your face mask.    I hope the above information clears up some questions you might have.   

What is it like to fly at the moment? 

It was a bizarre feeling only seeing five flights on the departure board of Heathrow terminal 5, usually the busiest airport in Europe. It did come as a shock.    Heathrow felt like a ghost town with limited passenger numbers flying on the day.    Throughout Heathrow, you will have to wear a facemask at all times from the entrance until you’ve exited at your arrival destination. It’s advised to swap your face mask every few hours, so you should pack a selection to use throughout your travels.    My temperature was checked as I entered Heathrow airport and I found hand sanitizer located all around the airport.    Check-in was rather swift, and many airlines are allowing free baggage check-in to free up space in the cabin, which is worth taking advantage of.    Security has never felt so fast; it was a swift experience and didn’t take much time at all.    Once airside, in regard to places to eat, I could only find one Pret open, which was enough to grab a coffee and a bite to eat before the flight.    Most airlines are not allowing food and drink service at the moment.    I did notice that a passenger requested a cup of water which was allowed but generally, nothing will be served on the flight unless you’re travelling business.    At the boarding gate, passengers were boarding individually based on row numbers, starting from the back of the aircraft towards the front.    At the check-in desk, the staff said to allow an extra hour due to additional boarding time. Be patient as it will take more time to board the flight, but you could always book your seat at the back if you wish to board sooner.    Once on the flight, cabin crew informed us that the aircraft used an advanced air flow filtration system that kills most germs. This, combined with a face mask and limited contact, helps to reduce the risk.    Once I was at my seat, I noticed that the airline had used empty seats to keep travellers at a safe distance from each other as best as they could.    They also blocked off and limited access to the number of toilets you could use. You can still use them but not as many so you might have to wait.    Generally, I found the flying experience rather relaxing and pleasant, indeed longer than usual, but the additional steps gave me reassurance rather than worry.    I wouldn’t want to take a flight with a connection due to the extra time it takes to board and go through the airport, but one direct flight wouldn’t be an issue.   

What was your hotel resort like in Lanzarote?  

I stayed at the Sands Beach resort located in Costa Teguise on the island of Lanzarote.    They had self-catering options for families with a large selection of swimming pools to choose from, which was great for social distance swimming.    Swimming is one of the things I missed the most, so it was a much-welcomed joy to have a few laps in the pool each morning.    The breakfast buffet was open, and you had to order each item individually. This will take some additional time, so be sure to arrive early to allow your choices to be accommodated.    I would visit the local supermarket and stock up on breakfast items to make in your room so you can relax in the morning and take the stress out of breakfast.    Not all resorts are open yet in Lanzarote, and some have chosen to stay closed until September so your choices will be limited.    The Sands Beach Resort chose to open early to learn about the extra steps needed to open up. The Spanish government have issued rules that resorts must follow to remain open to meet the health guidelines and create a safe environment for guests.    Another issue is staff. The resort is running at low capacity and it’s been tough getting the team back to work as some have chosen to wait until it’s safer to return to work while others are happy to get back to work again.    Rooms are required to undergo additional cleaning after each guest which is why I would recommend staying for 1-2 weeks.    Also, the stock has been an issue as the supply chain for resorts has not been open on the island since lockdown and resorts are having to use supermarkets to purchase items they need to operate.    It will take some time for resorts to open up again but those that have chosen to open up as soon as possible will learn from the experience and adapt to the guidelines, which will take time for some resorts to adjust to.   

What is it like going to a restaurant on the Canary Islands?

After cooking for myself for three months, I’ve simply run out of hot pot recipes and I’m also getting a bit bored of baking banana bread.    Being allowed to visit restaurants again and not have to do the washing up was one of the most enjoyable moments from the trip.    Getting to taste the local flavours again was an absolute pleasure. Enjoying fresh seafood and a glass of white wine that’s made on the island was pure joy.    If you wish to dine out, it’s best to call in advance to book a table as space within the premise is limited due to schedules and social distance.    I noticed that temperature checks took place before entering the restaurant, and hand sanitizer was always found at the entrance.    You must wear a facemask until you have taken a seat at your table, then you can take it off to enjoy your food and drink.    Also, I noticed that the menu could typically be found by using a QR code to access on your smartphone. Make sure you have your Roam Like at Home data turned on while travelling around the EU as it will come in handy.    If you can pay for your meal by using contactless payment, this would be the best method rather than using cash.   

Do you need to fill out health forms before you travel?

Spain requires you to fill in a health form before you arrive. Once the form is completed online, you will get a QR code which will be scanned on arrival.   You must be checked into your flight and have your seat number before you fill out the form. This information helps with track and trace, and you will be contacted if needed.    Also, when returning to the UK, you must fill in a form explaining where you’ve been and where you will be going to in the UK.   After filling in the UK form and placing my address in Wales where I will be, I instantly got an email from the Welsh government asking me to quarantine and stay at home for two weeks. I was not aware that the rules in Wales required two weeks quarantine, but not a problem as I have been home for the past two weeks and will follow the guidelines as instructed. Something to think about as I was also aware that those from Scotland had been advised not to travel to Spain altogether. So, the rules are different depending on where you live.   

Did I enjoy my trip to Lanzarote, Canary Islands? 

The most important question. Did I have a great time going to Lanzarote? Were all the extra steps worth it?    My answer is for the most part yes. I do have mixed opinions about it though, as I enjoyed the trip, but travel is no longer normal like it used to be and some fun has been sucked out the experience.    But I do understand that this is for my own and others’ safety to allow tourism to open up again so I would say that it was worth it.    My issue was the length of the trip; I wish I could have stayed longer to justify the extra time you need to go through all the additional safety steps.    So, If I were staying in Lanzarote for two weeks, I would have said that it was worth it.   

My advice at the moment to make travel safer during COVID-19 

I would recommend only taking one direct flight to reach your destination. Avoid having to take connection flights as this increases your risk of a possible infection.    Stay in one resort and try to find a self-catering option so you can prepare breakfast and lunch from your room as buffets are not a safe environment at the moment.    Book ahead to reserve your table if you wish to dine out at a local restaurant.    Book a rental car to explore your surroundings and avoid public transport.    Use contactless payment and avoid cash when possible.    Stay for 1-2 weeks. Travel to your destination will take more time so you should allocate this time into your holiday to make it more rewarding.    Don’t forget to relax and enjoy your holiday. You will have to go through many additional steps to make your holiday safe so please have patience, remain calm and take your time.    For this reason, a weekend city escape might not be ideal at the moment as you won’t have enough time to enjoy the actual holiday.   

Thank you for reading my blog post about my trip to Lanzarote  

I hope all the above information helps you understand what travel and tourism are currently like in Europe at this moment in time, and I wish you a pleasant future trip!     This blog post was put together in collaboration with the UNWTO and the Canary Islands as part of the #RestartTourism campaign to help tourism recovery on the islands. I hope you’ve found this blog post informative.   Travel tip shared by Dave  

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