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robertfettuccine · 1 month ago
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❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️ OBSERVE MY PIE ❗️❗️❗️❗️❗️
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inbabylontheywept · 6 months ago
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so once me and my wife were watching a documentary where a snake ate like a million eggs. that snake just went to fucking town on eggs. and the snake made the eggs look so good that i kept thinking about it, and thinking about it, and thinking about it, and eventually it was 11pm and i ran out of willpower and decided to eat one (1) singular raw egg just to prove to myself that the snake was surely a liar.
the snake was not a liar. texture is like, super important to me and raw eggs are very Texture so i had another one, and then another one, and then another one, and eventually i ran out of eggs.
i had like, fifteen raw eggs.
i didnt really know how to explain this momentary madness to my wife, so my Plan was to put all the eggshells into a grocey bag, and then throw that grocery bag in the dumpster, and if she never noticed that would be Excellent and if she noticed immediately i could lie and say that the eggs went bad.
except i cant lie very good, and of course with murphys law being such, i got salmonella.
so i threw up a lot and my wife asked me what poisoned me so and i tried very hard to dodge the question but i was oozing shame like oil from a room temperature cheese and eventaully i gave in and told her everything and to her enormous credit she was more flabbergasted than actually upset. she did make me promise to not eat any more raw eggs, which i have stuck to, and she gives me weird looks during nature documentaries now as if desire was the only thing keeping me from eating thousands of pounds of krill anyway i made a joke earlier about being able to eat my age in eggs and my sister in law in law made a drawing to comemorate the moment and also because it was my birthday. she's excellent. thank you 10000000% @cintailed. you should all visit her page and admire her work.
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violetreminder · 3 months ago
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I hope the "What if Disco Elysium was about a witch finding her cat in the mountains" post never leaves the gaming discourse vernacular. It will never not be funny to me bc it's got all the Gamer Entitlement™ levels of CoD bros throwing hissy fits about "woke" shit but instead of being couched in far right reactionism it's the exact kind of "Kingdom of Conscience" style liberal outrage at anything with conviction and beliefs that DE waxed on about. Like even chuds who get mad that the game calls you out for being racist interact with the themes of DE better and understand them more than Cat Lady did.
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lovelyfuriousenthusiast · 2 months ago
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so-hot-24 · 10 days ago
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🔞My Personal Full Video👉Watch Now Free👈
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iapislazuli · 2 years ago
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idk what traumatized or mentally ill person needs to hear this but dreams (especially the really disturbing ones you dont want to talk about to anybody) arent some deep peek into your psyche or a sign of your True Desires or whatever theyre quite literally your brain making fruit salad with whatever it can find on the shelf. just putting all that shit in a blender and hitting obliterate. its fine, youre fine, youre not a weirdo for it
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fattylime · 2 years ago
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a study i did because i realized idk how to draw environments at all LMAO
a few people have asked, so this is a now a print <3
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wuucchoo · 2 months ago
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waiting for megumi's class to end so they can play ૮⍝• ᴥ •⍝ა
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theorder6 · 2 months ago
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Babby's 2st post :) modern tech is infuriating, and it was either this or I write a manifesto.
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shitpostingkats · 4 months ago
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We need less "shy, anxious, always second guessing" Apollo in fanworks, and approximately 400% more of whatever the hell this is.
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botanyshitposts · 6 months ago
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me explaining to my grandma that the turkey tail and golden oyster mushrooms and birds nest fungi growing on her huge backyard tree stump are simply eating the dead wood to return it to the soil and they're cute and colorful and add to the whimsy of her landscaping and are not causing the weeds in other places of the yard or harming her little white dog
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bubblefine · 6 months ago
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you're barking up the wrong tree there dude. or, haunting up the wrong apartment imao
this was obviously inspired by this post by the awesome account of @nicktoons-unite-incorrect-quotes !
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morganpdf · 10 months ago
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does anyone else feel kind of slutty refilling soap bottles
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prettyolou4 · 23 days ago
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Say Ahhhhhh😛
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cozylittleartblog · 11 months ago
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cant tell you how bad it feels to constantly tell other artists to come to tumblr, because its the last good website that isn't fucked up by spoonfeeding algorithms and AI bullshit and isn't based around meaningless likes
just to watch that all fall apart in the last year or so and especially the last two weeks
there's nowhere good to go anymore for artists.
edit - a lot of people are saying the tags are important so actually, you'll look at my tags.
#please dont delete your accounts because of the AI crap. your art deserves more than being lost like that #if you have a good PC please glaze or nightshade it. if you dont or it doesnt work with your style (like mine) please start watermarking #use a plain-ish font. make it your username. if people can't google what your watermark says and find ur account its not a good watermark #it needs to be central in the image - NOT on the canvas edges - and put it in multiple places if you are compelled #please dont stop posting your art because of this shit. we just have to hope regulations will come slamming down on these shitheads#in the next year or two and you want to have accounts to come back to. the world Needs real art #if we all leave that just makes more room for these scam artists to fill in with their soulless recycled garbage #improvise adapt overcome. it sucks but it is what it is for the moment. safeguard yourself as best you can without making #years of art from thousands of artists lost media. the digital world and art is too temporary to hastily click a Delete button out of spite
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