#fictohearted

[that-dreaming-dragon]

Noemata and Exomemories

I don’t really get much exomemories. Not from other lives at least. Depends on when and how you or I count lucid dream world, it’d be a toss up for me to call all of them exomemories, but I also wouldn’t say some of them aren’t. It gets fuzzy at time whether it truly is just made up chaos from mind, or if it has been a view into a different world. Sometimes they felt like that.

The dream I talked about last day has a bit of element of exomemories in there. How much? I do not know.

Other moments where I have exomemories are from vision. This was me doing a group guided mediation, and I sort of fell asleep, but then.

Thunder booming, flashing, the storm raging. The sky is dark, and the ocean is wailing. Peeking through the clouds, a sliver of form, a white dragon darting in and out of the storm clouds.

I don’t actually know if it was indeed my kardiatype, but there is a inkling of it being true, so I’d like to think so. And based on that, I do think they have a storm based power. Just like your typical generic east asian dragon. (You can see I have a lot of gripe of my kardiatype being seen as Haku)

You can say the rest of the thing I figured or theorized are based off of the exomemories, I would call some of them noemata, even if a bit wobbly. Because how am I sure my kardiatype was a prince of the ocean? To be honest, I’m not certain either. Sometimes there are just things we don’t or can’t know about our identitype, and that’s okay, their significance and for the identification ones, our self identifications, do not diminish just because we end up having created element within. After all, the phrase “to make memories” is not just a metaphor. You are “living, doing, creating, experiencing.”[1]

Talk about created memories vs exomemories. I also had a flash of vision with my hearttype that confused me to no end, because while it is a possible headcanon of mine, my mind was no where near thinking of a headcanon to even get there.

Laughter. A kid with bright blond hair running towards a village, a house. A pair of eldery couple came out to greet the young child.

I know that’s not Konoha. And I know that kid is me/not-me/Naruto.

It’s really interesting how I can remember it so clearly, compare to my dream memories that are faded at the edge, blurry. I think that’s why I see that as a exomemories. There’s too much other sensation, the sight clear, the sound loud, and maybe scent? You also see I had momentary confusion between the self pronoun there. That was the spark for me to ponder if it may be a kardiatype that was later disregarded, as while important to me, my Naruto hearttype wasn’t a foundational building block of who I am. I also don’t know if Kurama was with that Naruto. But here is where noemata comes in.

I have a lot, and a lot of noemata. Things I just know in my gut. Maybe for my fictomere they are influenced by the source material as well as fandom interpretation. But still. Headcanon and imagined story in my head had this ethereal feeling, like they are not all there, much more pliable, but also more distant from me.

My Naruto hearttype has a Kurama with him. And has a far strong tie to Uzushio. I don’t know if Uzushio was around, maybe that’s why that little bit of exomemory, that Naruto wasn’t in any place recognizable. It look like a random village, all wood hut. Maybe those are Uzushio people.

I think that is true.

A lot of the times, noemata just pops out of nowhere. Or sometimes, I ask questions, and something within me will answer. And I will know. It is why when I assist others in self discovery, I will ask questions, and the “no”’s and “maybe”’s are just as valuable as “yes”’s.

Sometimes you don’t even have to ask questions, something external will trigger and you had that lightbulb turning on moment. Like how I realized that three-tailed kitsune is specific is my Naruto hearttype’s paratype, and how my Aurelion Sol is the 5th concept version that people dub the “unbounded” form. Or that my kardiatype’s guarded village was one that was in ancient Japan, not one of the well known period people likes to talk about.

My own style of self discovery is very lax, “follow the flow” style, however. I got a lot of noemata jumpscare this way.

Like how out of the thousands of pokemon, it was Mew that resonated with me and become a archetrope, instead of say, dragonite or ditto.

Like I somehow figured out I’m not neccessary flying so much that I’m floating. Like how Mew does. Or that I don’t breath any elemental attack. Or the various detail discovery with each and every one of my forms, how the aquatic form have far more different physics than many of my other forms (shark head, sonar receptive ears, quill feather on back though that’s more from phantom shift than pure noemata, turtle flipper though that’s more a empathy moment from playing Ark Survive Evolved and seeing how the magmasaur’s hind leg moves), how I’m just certain that the dream dragon kintype is a present thing, current life thing.

It gets harder and harder to tell if some noemata are purely random, or maybe born from the churning of internal contemplation that always accompanied the discussion on alterhumanity within the community. Like when I figure that I do not eat physical substance, or how I know I as a dragon is a spirit, sort of like youkai and kami, sort of a energy being, sort of a pokemon like creature, a rpg monster.

Regardless of exomemories, noemata that are from random chances or from deliberately triggered knowledge, or created memories or personal “canon”, these are all the breadcrumbs of one’s alterhumanity, all important, all precious.

[1] You’re Here to Make Moments, Not Memories

https://medium.com/mind-cafe/youre-here-to-make-moments-not-memories-249970eed41f

[that-dreaming-dragon]

On my otherkinity, I'm mostly spiritual/metaphysical with dashes of psychological.

My kardiatype, while being a past life so obviously heavily spiritual, I wonder if there are psychological reasoning behind it too.

My otherhearted/fictoheartedness is somewhat more spiritual than my otherkinity.

Below the cut is me explaining them in more detail.

My Otherkinity: the Shapeshifter Dragonkind

To put it very simply, my very core, my essence, is draconic.

And that by itself is already fuzzy as a defining point for my otherkinity's origin.

I have a couple known past lives, and there is one that was a dragon which is a kardiatype. I think there is a possibility that my being a dragon in this life has part of it due to that dragon now being a building block of who I am at the present.

I'm neurodivergent, I'm an artist. I think both of these have a factor in how I see myself. Perhaps how I look truly comes from me creating art of myself and then I just say that is me. Or I just happen to visualize how I look and then draw it. It's a lot of chicken and egg situations.

And, growing up, people close to me already associate me with dragons. My very spiritual (Buddhist root) family and some friends also have inside jokes for me about my animalistic behavior and general dragon-ness. I think that may reinforce psychologically onto my own identity.

It is generally a convoluted mess. Maybe a term would be nice, but we are kind of saturated on that.

My kardiatype: the ocean eastern dragon

Throughout my life, that dragon is in the back of my mind. I knew who and what I am. But I didn't draw down a clear line prior to the creation of the term kardiatype. It's like something you kind of have an idea of, but until someone spell it out, you can't exactly tell.

So for a long time, I just live with people associating me with that dragon. Or well, just a dragon, because my past life is that dragon. I didn't quite like it, but I have no way to say why, no reason to say otherwise. Despite me also clearly knowing the dragon I am is rather different from that dragon.

That's why I questioned whether there is something more psychological about it than purely spiritual. Because once the coiner made the term, I had more awareness of this distance, separation of "no, I am not that dragon", I get to step back and breathe and be myself. I don't want to call that dragon baggage because that dragon has many things I still want to discover and learn from. But that dragon is a bit like baggage, overshadowing who I am right at this moment, in this life.

Perhaps it's rebellion at the invincible force of "fate"?

Thus I think it has a flavor of psychological reasoning of why I have this kardiatype, the push and pull of that past, and how I held on to it while simultaneously distancing myself from it.

Fictohearted: Uzumaki Naruto

This one has all the irony. I think this one has a lot of spiritual reasoning behind it, while also psychological.

I have an unknown but suspected past life where I theorize it might have been a sort of ancient Japanese warrior. I have a penchant for stealth games, so I think it is highly possible to be a shinobi or related past life.

I also read a lot of Naruto fanfiction as a way of comfort and a coping mechanism. Which probably attributed to a lot of psychological factors. But I didn't have this relationship with all the other fandom I had spent an extensive amount of time on (I'm not quite sure if they count as hyperfixations). Perhaps this also strengthened my growing connection with my now-hearttype.

I suppose my hearttedness is kind of an even split between spiritual and psychological reasoning.

Alterhumanity is divers

As we all know, there are many, many ways and reasons to be nonhuman. To show how divers this experience truly is, I want to collect as many of those reasons as possible - if you have a minute to spare, please put in the comments, tags or in a reblog what you are and what you think the reason for your alterhumanity is. You can be as broad ("it's spiritual for me") or as specific as you want, all input is very much appreciated! Oh and, plurality counts as well, even if all of you are human. I plan to maayyybe make some sort of art-ish project out of this, if my ADHD allows me to lmao-

[astrophellian]

hello, you're the one who coined heart home & i need help figuring this out, please. is there any way to difference between a piece of media just being a special interest vs it being fictoheart/hearthome?i just found out about those 2 terms today while learing about alterhumans & i think Oz (from the books) may be my heart home? i cant tell & im going around asking for help.😅

Hello! Sorry this took a while to answer, brain fog has been heavy lately.

For the record, we did not coin hearthome itself- that word has been floating around in the alterhuman/therian/otherkin/etc communities for a long time. What we couned was the word hearthic, which can be used to describe and identify one's hearthome.

That being said, telling if a place is a special interest or your hearthome can be difficult. The exact differences can vary from person to person.

My advice is this: if you feel connected to a place because of how cool or interesting you find it, then its more likely a special interest. But if you feel connected to it because you feel like you want to return there (even if you've never been there before), or if it feels almost familiar to you, then its more likely your hearthome.

Now, keep a few things in mind-

Its entirely possible that a place is a special interest as well as your hearthome. It can be both!

Also, the person who is most qualified to tell you what a place means to you is you. If you think Oz is your hearthome, and you want to call it that, then Oz is your hearthome. And if you turn put to be wrong later? Then you can decide to stop calling it that.

I'm not the Label Police. I can't tell you whether or not to call Oz your hearthome, and I dont want to. I can only provide tips that have worked for us.

I wish you the best of luck in your self-discovery.

[digitalhotlines]

I think I might be fictohearted with Shadow the Hedgehog like idk if it's just "I relate" or "I him" situation

[fictionkinfessions]

New kinfession blog! I'm pretty new here around tumblr, i won't use my real name but on anon i go by Dx. Douxie, so hello fictionkin community! This is to make myself known! My main fictotypes are Jim Lake Jr. wich is my highest kin (both spiritual and psychological) and Rapunzel from Rapunzel's Tangled Aventure/Tangled: The Series. I'll probably confess about my fictohearts/kins, my canons, etc. Nice to meet you all! :)

- Dx. Douxie

📦

[that-dreaming-dragon]

adding onto what's already been responded, I want to toss a link here to my own side blog that strictly host alterhuman information available on tumblr, the specific link will take you to the alterhuman's coinage post to tell you the broadness and how big the umbrella can be.

What you are describing, some would call that heartedness. Animalhearted, otherhearted, fictohearted, all the same thing. Just wanted to toss that in here for consideration as well.

There is zero such requirement such as needing to have or for the identity to be a past life or it has to be spiritual. It's common for those to crop up because it's one of the more common explanations of the origin of one's alterhumanity compared to everything else. The other big explanation is nd brain. There are numerous ways one attributes where their alterhumanity came from, but the important part is your feelings and sense of self/identity.

Alright I've deleted everything on this side blog so I could ask dumb questions without my friends seeing

So here's my first odd question that I can't find the answer to on Google

Why the hell do I want to be a creature

Like a non-human beast

Don't get the wrong idea, I'm not a therian, I don't identify as non-human, I'm well aware that I am and that will not change

But like I wish I had ram horns, goat like ears, a long tail, and walked upright on digitigrade legs

Like a faun or a satyr but with paws instead of hooves, with sharp predatory teeth as well

And I find that when I walk on my toes and pretend I have paws, or I stretch with my arms out like an animal, or shake my head like one, I feel content

But again, I don't identify as an animal, think I am one, or anything else, I just find that when I act like this or pretend to be this one particular made up beast, it makes me happy and comfortable, but I don't understand why

I never do this in front of anyone, this is kept to myself, but I figured I'd just ask if anyone else does this

[fictionkinfessionsarchived]

I’m kin with a person who’s best friends with a lighting bird, fictohearted with a god of thunder and lightning, and kinsidering a kid with electricity based powers, and now I routinely fix small electronics around my house. I seem to have a type -Spark (pokemon go) and possibly Denki Kaminari (bnha)

[that-dreaming-dragon]

Fictionfolk of Old/Obscure/Niche Source

Doesn't it sometimes just feel lonely and alienating?

[that-dreaming-dragon]

This is such a lovely experience to read about, thank you for sharing.

I agree with a lot of things here. Especially with my background of beliefs that the soul can fracture and split thru each transmigration, or that something something similar to bilocation shifts. If you will it hard enough, you might just go there. Or something. A webcomic I'd read (before? the alterhuman community), talks about a concept of how dissatisfied the characters are with their current living, and somehow that was enough for them to phase through to appear in the same space (from an alternative universe) other characters that also is unsatisfied with their life, their realities merged/swapped/or they end up being parallel on that point, only in that place. IIRC.

I better try to get back to my point before I lose the thread completely.

I myself have been contemplating if my hearttype is a kardiatype. Or, as you have told of your story, perhaps my hearttype (that I'm still unsure if spiritual origin or purely psychological) has turned into a spiritual kardiatype. I've had a flash of a vision of what my specific fictoheart's background is like, and it painted a very AU story compare to the canon. I had self-doubted if that was a headcanon for a long time, but every time in my heart I want to believe and feel--that it was not, it was something profound.

Gonna leave that thread hanging because I don't have a conclusion for that, and that's ok. I like spending time with all my alterhuman identities.

My kardiatype (thank you a million times for making the terms). Recently I wrote a more fleshed-out story to ready for art fight but, it wasn't all made up. There are truths all across the passages I wrote, breadcrumbs, and puzzle pieces I've collected together throughout my time contemplating my kardiatype. And perhaps a portion of that was in fact, purely made up. I can no longer tell anyways. They could have all came about because I was aware of this past life, and I call it a kardiatype for probably more psychological reasoning, and perhaps the actual life story of that dragon was really in term made real and happened and become something more spiritual, a second reality, because of it being my kardiatype. Who knows. I like to be messy with my alterhumanity, because it is all very chaotic and intertwined so much, I can tell ouroboros' head and tail apart better than I can my alterhumanities.

How a hearttype gave birth to a parallel life of a paratype - A view on the connection between spiritual and psychological roots for otherkinity

[Before I start, I want to point out that the following will be my own experience I simply wanted to write down for a while. Neither of what will be written here is there to dictate other peoples experiences or ways of feeling non/alterhuman.]

The one great discussion within our community is usually the differences between spiritual and psychological reasons for one’s identity: Which is more real? Which is more valid? Questions like these are talked about a lot and both sides don’t really want to listen to the other point of view. 

This is ridiculous as it is on it’s own, but I feel like many people forget that spiritual and psychological explanations can often be intertwined. There is the obvious: Identity is caused by ones psychologically. 

Yes, the kintype itself may or may not be there because of a past life, but still identify as that being is a psychological process. This is something I do see people talk about sometimes. The root may be a spiritual one, but at the end of the day the process of identification is still a psychological matter. 

What I don’t see people talk about though is the other way around. I don’t know how long it took me to figure out the basic of this one identity I have, because it’s nothing that ever came to my mind. 

It seems to be such an odd concept that I ignored it for so long. A spiritual connection that came to be because of a psychological phenomena. 

It only dawned on me when I thought a bit more about one of my hearttypes: Kuja from the game Final Fantasy IX. 

I still remember, when I first played the game almost 20 years ago it had a huge impact on me. Long story short: Kuja was created for one purpose alone, to wage war. In the end he does something to redeem himself and even though he dies before he is able to actually walk the road of redemption, the other characters in the game see his sacrifice as a source of hope. 

Seeing the man who tried to kill the heroes multiple times to save them in the end because he realized his wrong doings formed a lot of my personal morality. If someone makes the effort to better themselves they deserve a second chance.  As sad as it is, this usually isn‘t the case in real life. 

I consider Kuja a hearttype because his story and character shaped a really important part of my core identity: Pacifism and second chances. But when I grew older and saw more of the world I realized that this isn‘t how our world is made. There are a lot of people who don’t make an effort to become better, and there are a lot of people who do but aren‘t given a chance and somewhere along the line of seeing the world for what it is, a part of my soul, at least that’s what I believe, found another world where the core idea of my morality is the law. 

I had a different parallel life once, one that is now a past life. Through a lot of meditation or introspection the explanation I found for the cause of my old parallel life was some form of split soul, a tiny part of my soul that got separated for some reason long time ago living somewhere else, but all life end one day, even if it’s after 5000 of years and this tiny part of my soul came back not knowing if it even belonged in this world I am now. But shortly after it found a new world, the world I mentioned above. 

My parallel life is a spiritual thing. A piece of my soul inhabited another body in another world but the reason for this to happen was a psychological one, the desire to life in a world where the core of my identity would fit into, a core that formed almost two decades ago. And it’s also not a world that is in any way similar to the source of my hearttype. It’s not that I came up with a world that would fit my needs or desires, it’s not that I started to think what my ideal world would be like. It’s so different from anything I would’ve come up with on my own. Because at first I thought: What if it’s just something I created myself subconsciously? But given how different it is from everything I’ve ever created, and how it just came to be so suddenly after my old parallel life ended I can’t see how it’s something my psyche made up. It was just that I had a desire and a piece of my soul sought out a way to make a spiritual connection to something that may could fulfil that desire. 

A paratype, with a parallel life, of a hearttype.

[that-dreaming-dragon]

Just some thoughts on my own alterhumanity.

I have quite a few echo links. It’s not an actual term, but it’s basically that I felt some sort of connection due to my established ‘types, so a sort of paratype bond is formed. And then I reinforce that with intentional linking. A feedback that bounce back and forth and creates some sort of para-heart-linktype.

Dragonite is like this.

Maybe the rupicola is like this.

the enfield, or more specifically, foxes or kitsune, is like this, which is derived from my Naruto hearttype

[that-dreaming-dragon]

Sometimes I wish I can just ramble about my hearted experience and its source and have feedback. It’s kinda lonely sometimes, many people either don’t know it, or hated it. Which, fair I guess, it’s got a lot of its own issue. It’s either fandom space which is not a safe space to talk about alterhuman feelings, or within the alterhuman community and have a hard time finding anyone that share your source.

But sometimes I just want to, talk about it and hope somebody respond and maybe understand.

My hearttype of Uzumaki Naruto is precious to me. And sometimes I just wish I can have more space and more resonance.

[angelic-polar-fox]

hi! i've been wondering if this character could be a fictionhearted (heartedtype?), but i don't know much else other than the definition

maybe it fits, but the thing is that i don't understand how being one is supposed to feel like

i feel a strong connection to this character (but it could be just a thing of the monent dunno), i don't feel like that's me and it definitely isn't a choice. i alternate between this to "i just related strongly to him" so maybe it's just kff? but i also don't even get what it is i relate to

it does feel different here than any other character, but maybe that's just cause it's my current hyperfixation. he's not even my fave, though

it could also just be because i coped with him some months ago

thank you in advance

Hey~ Sorry for the late response, I just had a lot to do the last days

Apart from the "strongly relate to/with" part from the definition of 'hearted, one important aspect of such identety is usually, that this way of relating to/with or your love for that character/being is something that makes you you.

As in, you wouldn't be the same person if it wouldn't be for this character. In that regard it also doesn't really matter if it sometimes comes and goes, because it's just normal that feelings are sometimes a bit stronger or weaker depending on your mood.

As an example, I'm fictohearted with Kuja from Final Fantasy IX, the reason for that is, that his story had a great impact on me, when I was a child (the time I first played the game). Overall the whole game shaped much of my morality, but especially Kuja is one big reason why I personally have the outlook on life I do have. I doubt I would be the same person I am now, if it wouldn't be for him. At first I thought he could be a fictotype, but I eventually realized that this wasn't the case.

The advice I can give you is to think of the follow: - what exactly about the character makes me relate to him? - is there something about that character that changes me or makes me the way I am?

It's also important to maybe try to ignore the source for a while to see if the feelings will come back on it's own later on. And one thing I also would like to mention: It's completely possible for one character to be a fictiontype, a hearttype and a copinglink in one.

I hope I could help a bit. I usually don't like to pass the torch and stuff, but since I'm hardly a savant when it comes to hearttypes, I'd recommend to maybe also ask @aestherians since rae knows a lot more about this whole topic than I do.

Good luck in your questioning process!

[that-dreaming-dragon]

oh, heck. I’m glad I found this. Because I definitely have trouble with distinguishing “is this noema or headcanon”. And it is even more of a crisis because the fact that it is a fictohearttype.

I gave up figuring it out. I’m just along for the ride wherever my mind takes me.

The one specific flash of something was definitely precious to me. But I’m also interacting with the fan-made content far too much for me to be sure if there isn’t bias in play.

How would you differentiate memories/noemata from headcanons or just ideas?

If it makes me feel icky or weird to consciously change it, it's more likely to be a noema than a headcanon.

Like, I frequently change up my headcanons about Osmosians (Kevin's species in Ben 1O). I've pushed the idea on the fandom that they're cryptids just because it's fun. But in my heart I know that they're aliens (that have probably lived among humans for a few centuries, leading to all the confusion about their origins).

It just feels wrong when I try to intentionally change my noemata. That's the most clear giveaway for me. Something just stops me from changing it.

[fictionkinfessions]

/post/616469567270748160/i-cant-tell-if-i-really-am-kin-in-the I do hope you find an answer that works for you, but being otherkin isn't, and has never been, being comfortable in your skin. It is a term that specifically refers to having memories of another life. I'm sorry that you haven't felt safe in the community, however, words mean things. I'd recommend checking out synpath and fictohearted communities if you haven't yet, as I've had mostly positive experiences with those.