#fic: kadena

[cliquestitsandicks]

Rewatching Wildmoore scenes and started playing a game of Married, Partnered, or Broken Up for my queer ships.

Wildmoore: Married. In the erased timeline on The Flash, they were already married. That timeline is no more, but I think they still end up happily married maybe 3 years after the season 3 finale. Sophie has been in a sham marriage before, living a total lie personally and professionally. I think it’s going to be everything to her to be able to live her complete truth and that includes being able to call Ryan her wife. As for Ryan, she’s never had the comfort of stability and belonging. It’s going to mean the world to her to have not just her biological family, but a home with her wife Sophie who chooses her everyday. Given their ages, experiences, and history with each other, neither of them was going into this relationship unless they thought it had a chance of going the distance anyway. Consider how long it took for them to act on their feelings, as apparent as they were, even though they were seeing each other every day and night.

Catradora: absolutely married.

Pearl and Bismuth: Partnered and living together, but not married.

Garnet: still, forever and always, married. But lives as Ruby and Sapphire more often.

Kadena: Partnered and living together, but not married. And Adena takes an extended international assignment once or twice a year to keep from feeling trapped/caged. She typically stays for about 5 weeks, asking Kat to join her for the 3rd week. She always showers Kat with affection and reassurances (even though she’s long ago told her she doesn’t need them anymore) when she returns.

Carson and Greta: And They Were Roommates (as close to married as we would probably get in 1943). They wouldn’t be able to get a house without a man. I’m thinking their coach helps them get one.

Max and Esther: Broken up but still friends. It was good for a while, but ultimately Max needed time to find herself and adjust to this new level of freedom. Esther found someone else while she did that and they’ve been roommates for 10 years.

Calzona: re-married when Sofia was 19. Lots of therapy and a change in their dynamics helped this. Teddy, Cristina, April, Webber, Bailey, Meredith, and Mrs. O’Malley attended after Sofia told Zola it was happening.

Korrasami: married like crazy. You’ve never seen an avatar married so hard. They give Aang and Katara a run for their money. This is the avatar state of marriages.

Not canon, but go with it… Laurel and Michaela: Partnered but not married. Hear me out. I’ve said it before and I stand by it, Michaela was in love with Laurel. It’s canon that she loved her; Annalise said it, told Michaela that Laurel didn’t “deserve” her love in that pillow-hitting therapy session scene. It’s just not canonically said that she was in love with her even though her behavior and vulnerability with her suggest so. Anywho… Michaela, like the rest of the non-white male Keating 5, had an unfair share of trauma even before law school and it drove her to seek 2 things above everything else - success and a sense of traditional normality in her home life. That second part is why i think the series is completely on track in that she will marry a man and have children with him. But i think she also knows she can’t shake what she feels for Laurel and her child. If given the chance to keep them in her life she absolutely will. I imagine her conducting a relationship with Laurel that is very much a “romantic friendship” as the fics call it. Like they are clearly more than platonic but she’s trying to pretend they’re not until she can’t. She treats Laurel’s son the same as she does her daughters with this man - holds him the same, dotes on and soothes him the same, is there for all the milestones. Every weekend (starting Thursday nights) she and Laurel take the kids out together and have these sleepovers at Laurel’s where she and Laurel are in the same bed every time. Her husband knows all about this sleeping arrangement and has been just acting like his wife spending half her week in her other home with their kids is completely normal since he came to the hospital after Michaela had their first daughter to find Laurel in the bed with her soothing said daughter as Michaela napped while cuddled into her side. He knows exactly what this marriage is and is not. He benefits from having this image as much as she does. But it all comes to a head when he has an affair. Michaela is livid but he just deadpans her and says “you have a whole wife i share half your time with. Our children knew her voice from the womb and were bilingual by the time they were 3 even though neither of us speaks Spanish. But i can’t have someone i just sleep with occasionally?”

[sevens-evan]

pride month day 1

author: daisys-quake

rated: g

pairing: kat edison/adena el-amin

word count: 1092

prompt: kat introducing adena to jane and sutton.

a/n: this focused a lot more on kat’s Feelings™ than any sort of introductions but i hope yall like it anyway. first kadena fic so any notes on characterization are encouraged. i’m accepting any and all lgbtq prompts through the end of june for pride month (see my post explaining here). enjoy.

Kat checks her phone anxiously for at least the fifteenth time in the last five minutes.

“Enough,” Sutton says from beside her. She holds out a hand, wiggling her fingers pointedly. “Phone,” she demands.

“But—“

“Phone.” Kat hesitates, and Sutton rolls her eyes. “Come on,” she says. “I’ll give it back when you’re done freaking out. Give me the phone.” Kat reluctantly hands the phone over, and Sutton pockets it.

“It’s gonna be fine,” Jane says from Kat’s other side. “You were with her just two weeks ago.”

“I know, but I—“ Kat shakes her head. “What if she doesn’t like you guys? What if you don’t like her?”

“Okay, first of all, we’re awesome, how could she not love us?” Sutton says, successfully drawing a smile from Kat. “And I’m sure anyone who can get you this nervous is pretty fucking incredible.”

“Seriously,” Jane agrees. “This is the first time I’ve seen you this invested in somebody since…has she ever been like this before?” She adds the last few words as an aside to Sutton.

“Nope,” Sutton answers. Kat exhales slowly, trying to calm her racing pulse.

“This—this just really matters to me,” she says quietly. “Adena and—you guys. I kind of need you to get along, since I’m not planning to lose either of you any time soon.” Sutton tugs her into a side hug, squeezing her tight before letting go.

“We’ve got you,” Jane says, bumping her shoulder against Kat’s arm. Sutton pulls Kat’s phone back out of her pocket as it buzzes, glancing at the glowing screen.

“Hey, look, she made it through customs,” she says, handing the phone back to Kat. Kat looks down at the screen. One new text from Adena El-Amin.

Through customs. On my way to you.

It’s accompanied with a heart emoji, which makes Kat smile widely, pressing the phone against her chest. She can feel her face warming with embarrassment or joy, or, more probably, both. She looks around, eyes searching the crowd in the airport, scanning for that familiar, graceful figure.

“Is that her?” Jane hisses from beside her, nudging Kat with her elbow. Kat turns wickedly fast, following Jane’s nod. Her eyes land on Adena, who is wandering through the crowd with a bag over her shoulder and a wheeled suitcase on the floor, searching for Kat, it seems, just as fervently as Kat is searching for her.

“She’s gorgeous,” Sutton says approvingly, but Kat hears it as if from a distance, vague and unimportant. Adena is turning, turning, looking through the hundreds of people rushing in every direction, until her eyes land on Kat.

Kat can pinpoint the exact moment Adena sees her. Her face lights up, not in a dramatic sort of way, but with a gentle smile and a slow, almost lazy wave. It still makes Kat dizzy that she is the person who Adena looks at like that; soft and open and—loving, if Kat’s admitting it to herself, although the idea terrifies her.

Kat hurries through the crowd, Jane and Sutton’s presence suddenly mattering very little. Adena does the same, dragging her suitcase as quickly as she can until she’s right in front of Kat. Kat pauses for half a second, eyes sweeping over Adena quickly, as if reassuring herself that she’s real, that Adena is here, standing in front of her, beautiful and smiling and—

“Are you crying?” Kat asks softly. Adena laughs, wiping at her face. She’s not crying, not really, but her eyes are bit watery and red when she steps forward.

“Come here,” she says, wrapping her arms around Kat and pressing her face into Kat’s shoulder. She mumbles something in Persian, and Kat doesn’t understand a single word of it but she squeezes Adena a bit tighter in acknowledgement all the same.

Kat isn’t sure how long they stand like that, embracing in the airport as the world rushes past them, but when they finally pull apart far enough to look each other in the eye, she finds she doesn’t care all that much.

“Hey,” Kat says with a smile. “You wanna meet my best friends?” Adena tips her head back and laughs, relieved and happy and light, and God, Kat is so helpless for this girl.

“I think I’d like that,” Adena says, still smiling. Kat takes the bag from Adena’s back, slipping it onto her own and taking Adena’s free hand, lacing their fingers together. Just holding hands with her makes Kat’s heart flutter, which is ridiculous, it isn’t like they haven’t been a thousand times more intimate—but it’s the casual way Adena accepts the gesture, running her thumb of the back of Kat’s hand unconsciously; the way they walk, hand-in-hand, over to where Jane and Sutton are waiting, as if they’ve been holding hands for years, as if this is somehow more natural than walking alone.

It’s starting to feel that way, if Kat’s being honest. It’s too easy to fall in love with Adena, too easy to get used to this feeling of companionship, of being whole. She feels more complete with Adena than she ever has before, and that’s a terrifying realization, because what happens when it’s over?

But she doesn’t have to think about that right now, because right now, they’re stopping in front of Jane and Sutton, and Adena is letting go of her hand to accept Sutton’s greeting hug, and oh, Kat had forgotten to warn Adena that her friends are very, very tactile. But Adena doesn’t seem to mind; she accepts the hugs from both Sutton and Jane with a warm, if tired, smile. The moment she gets the chance, she steps back, taking Kat’s hand once more.

Kat looks over at her as Adena speaks to Jane and Sutton, smiling genuinely despite her clear exhaustion, and realizes that here, right here in this crowded airport that smells vaguely of greasy food and cleanser, are the three most important people in the world to her.

In the Uber on the way to Kat’s apartment, Adena falls asleep on her shoulder. Sutton smirks at her from the seat beside her.

“What?” Kat asks. Jane twists around in the passenger seat, making an expression similar to Sutton’s when she sees Adena curled into Kat’s side, Kat’s arm around her as she sleeps.

“Nothing,” Sutton says, still smirking.

“I like her,” Jane says.

“We like her,” Sutton corrects. Kat smiles, flushing warmly and glancing down at Adena’s sleeping form.

“Good,” she says quietly. “I like her, too.”

my ao3

[starchasertonight]

“In Full Bloom”

Summary:  Kat and Adena have a whole future to build together. It starts with the first six months. (a post-series finale fic)

Chapter: 1/2

Word Count: 5,114

I know it’s been a long while since I’ve really been on tumblr! I’ve been on twitter where a few of the remaining kadena folks migrated and haven’t really looked back since. (my handle on twitter is @/starchaser2n8) 

But I’m very happy and also nostalgic to share my send off fic for a pairing that I’ve so loved for the past few years. It’s been a joy to write fic for this small fandom. 

And I know the fandom has shrunk over time too, so it would mean a lot to me if you shared and/or commented on the story if you enjoy it! 

~ BZ

[heyheyohsorry]

Infatuation

Fandom: The Bold Type

Infatuation noun

Infatuated; Infatuating – transitive verb

1 : to cause to be foolish : deprive of sound judgment

2 : to inspire with a foolish or extravagant love or admiration

Adena’s already googled the word 100 times.

Reading the definition “deprive of sound judgment” seems to be the only thing that grounds her.

Surely, this thing with Kat Edison, has to be intense infatuation.

Infatuation.

It’s the only sound explanation as to why she can’t go a second without thinking about a girl she met. One night. For a few hours.

She blames it on the photos. Both of them. Two different Kat Edisons, one of her photo saying Misunderstood, and the other of the heart over her chest.

She blames it on her inability to delete them. She questions why she saved them. Why she was driven to print them. In color, in black and white, in greyscale. Why she blown them up, so Kat Edison’s face expands the wall of her studio. Why he’s shrunk them down to fit in her pocket.

This is where she’s been spending her nights. Starring at copies of a woman who should not have her heart like this.

It’s helpful that her show is coming up. It gives Adena an excuse to hide away from Coco.

It’s not helpful that her show is coming up. There’s not much work she can do while she’s infatuated with Kat Edison.

Technically, she’s infatuated by Kat Edison. It isn’t Adena’s fault that she is feeling the way she is. This transitive verb was done to her.

Adena was going about her day, in her own studio, when Kat Edison barged into her life. Curly hair, and round cheeks, and a fire and passion that made Adena listen. She came in with a challenge, that Adena dared to take.

Infatuation.

Because the only other option was love, and it couldn’t be love. You can’t fall in love in two days. At least, she can’t. She’s been in a relationship with Coco for three years and not once has she felt like this. Never has the thought of Coco made her joyful and giddy and well, horny.

That’s not to blame Coco. None of the relationships before her, have put Adena in a state like this. This constantly thinking, heart racing, restless feeling, had never happen before.

She can’t decide what to do with this emotion.

Perhaps if she invites Kat to her gallery opening. Maybe then, with Coco by her side, surrounded around the things she’s worked hard to earn, the profession that she struggled for, the partner she sacrificed years for. Maybe then this new consumption will let her go.

And if it doesn’t…

Adena will be driven to abandon everything for this infatuation, due to the small chance that this is love.

Not just an imitation, but extravagant love.

If this was love, she could understand why people wrote songs about it. Why movies had characters fight wars for this, move across the country for this. She’d understand her friends who painted their muses because of it. She wants to capture Kat.

Adena stares at the collage of Kat Edison on the studio wall, the shrine made for her, and hopes this is more than infatuation.

[lesbianrabbithole]

Kadena, Jane and a Janitor that supports love

One of my favorite scenes from episode 3 was Kat proposing to Jane. Not the proposing itself, although it was funny. But the cute Janitor encouraging them and celebrating when Jane says yes. 

So of course my mind started wandering, cause that’s what I do. And I came up with this scenario, potential fic, random idea. 

After that day the girls don’t think much about that moment, it was silly and funny but not a big deal for them. The Janitor does though. Not all the time, that would be creepy. But he is just a romantic and every time he sees Kat and Jane coming together to work he smiles a little and it’s happy that there’s still people out there that had found love. 

That’s why, when one morning he catches Kat kissing another woman at Safford’s lobby. A really attractive woman wearing a hijab that he has heard is working at Scarlet, he is upset. He can’t believe Kat did that to Jane!

He is torn about what to do. Should he tell Jane? Should he confront Kat or the other woman. We waits a couple days. Always watching Kat and Jane closely. Everything seems fine between them. They laugh and talk and still walk together into Safford every morning. Sometimes the other woman is with them too. He is even more mad. Not only did Kat cheat on Jane, but it’s with someone they both know, a friend. 

He can’t take it anymore. He goes to Kat and confront hers. Kat is confused, but laughs at it. “Don’t worry. It’s not what you think. Jane is okay with it.” He says, he understands.  Kat thinks that’s enough to explain to him that her and Jane were never together, but what he understands is that they are in some kind of open or poly relationship. It makes sense why Jane and Adena, now he knows her name, are so friendly too. He wonders if Sutton is into it, but he heard she is with some board member, so probably not.

He goes back to being happy. Love is still real and safe. Even if unconventional, he is not one to judge. 

Then one day, this annoying guy who he remembers used to work for Pinstripe, is following Jane when she clearly doesn’t want to talk to him. It’s not his place to interfere but he feels connected to them, so he does. 

“Hey, leave Jane alone. She doesn’t want to talk to you” “This is between me and my girlfriend.”

“I’m not your girlfriend.”

Oh damn! An Ex that can’t take a hint, our dear Janitor thinks. He won’t stand for it. He blocks Pinstripe so he can’t follow Jane when she walks to the elevator. Once she is safely away, he can’t resist. 

“Leave her alone. She is happy with her two hot girlfriends and they are better for her than you ever were.”

Pinstripe is left dumbfounded.

[treebranchy]

There was a kadena fic that I looooved reading but I can't remember the name. I was sure I had it bookmarked too in ao3.

It was basically like canon divergent of s1, anyways I remember the first kiss was chapter 16 lol and then kat and adena went to her parents beach house, they went on a hike and had the sex.

It was so incredibly well written. I remembered the author's name but when I went on their ao3 I couldn't find it. So that made me sad. Unless I got the author's name wrong. Anyways it was good and I miss that fic

[dontpercievememe]

A Kadena valentines day fic for ya 

[shit-before-the-shovel]

[sweeterthankarma]

Adena loves Kat. She knows this. It’s undeniable when she’ll wake up in the morning with both her phone and her mug of coffee in hand, black ringlet curls swaying as the woman exudes far more energy than Adena could ever muster at seven AM— even if she’d chugged triple the amount of coffee Kat had in her mug. Adena loves her so much.

[possibilistfanfiction]

Kat worried about her scars and being intimate with Adena after the bomb? 😭😭😭😭 I’m sorry I love angst lol

[alright yall rly are in it to win it w this universe but i will roll w that. also imma use this as many times as possible w them lmao but rn just so we can all be in hell together, anne carson is mean, a refresher:

pylades: i’ll take care of you.orestes: it’s rotten work.pylades: not to me. not if it’s you.]

//

maybe it’s because you haven’t really been kissed in over a week or maybe it’s because you’re literally always turned on by your girlfriend but you’re sorting out how to really make out with adena. you’re both laughing and your kisses are a mess, too desperate and intimate and a little funny, because your cast is bulky and adena almost sat on it and you’re just in love.

you finally get everything worked out, your legs coordinated and adena is above you and so fucking pretty, and her hands wander down your body, squeeze your breasts over your shirt, and she’s kissing your neck and everything is awesome until she’s reaching for the hem of your shirt and then your heart starts to race and something pounds behind your eyes and adena notices, of course she does, because she stops immediately.

‘are you okay, eshgham?’ 

you don’t know how to tell her that suddenly the idea of her seeing the scar that runs from just below your sternum along the ribs on your right side; you know, absolutely, that adena doesn’t care in the sense that you’re certain she thinks you are just as beautiful. you have other scars, just like anyone, one from getting your appendix out when you were six, one along the inside of your left arm from when you were twelve and slipped off the slide of your parents’ pool. 

but this is different, it’s big and kind of intense and from something horrible that happened to you, not some childhood memory that’s mostly dominated by all of the pancakes your dad made you after your surgery, or the stickers you and sarah wheaton had tried to make stick to your purple cast.

your new scar is still pink, barely healed, still a little achy. you have smaller ones from drains surgeons had put in, and you feel very suddenly embarrassed and a little terrified because your body has changed and you don’t understand all that it means yet; adena looks very concerned and so lovely, bathed in gentle city light from your big windows.

‘just a little sore still,’ you say, as convincingly as you can, lean up and kiss the crease between her brows. 

‘okay,’ adena says simply, lays down beside you and rubs a thumb over the faint scrape beneath your right eye. she’s quiet and you think you might start to cry so you close your eyes instead.

she doesn’t push you to say anything, only holds you tighter, and you fall asleep.

//

‘so,’ you say, your cast leg propped up on jane and sutton’s coffee table, your other tucked beneath you. you take a shaky breath and immediately they quiet from their bickering about something in big little lies—you don’t really understand the plot because you’d watched it almost exclusively for zoe kravitz, who can blame you—and they turn toward you.

‘what’s up?’ sutton asks.

‘well.’ you swallow. ‘i—uh, okay, i know this is kind of shitty but you guys know i got my stitches out two days ago and i feel, you know, tired and kind of sore still but pretty good, overall.’

your cheeks feel like they’re burning and sutton scoots toward you and holds your hand.

‘i know adena, and, like, everyone, i guess, saw the bandages and stitches and stuff because i was out of it and needed help changing and whatever.’ you shrug. ‘but i don’t know, were we making out yesterday and she went to take my shirt off and i kind of, you know, i kind of freaked out?’

‘oh, kat,’ jane says, serious and gentle. it makes you want to cry.

‘and i know adena would be the last person to think i’m less beautiful, or whatever—’ you roll your eyes at yourself and sutton grins—‘but i just felt, i don’t know, insecure?’

it’s a word you literally would never ever use to describe yourself; you’re confident and brave.

‘that makes sense,’ jane says.

‘what?’

she shakes her head and sutton puts her chin on your shoulder. ‘i mean, it makes sense that you would feel insecure, or nervous, not that you should, obviously, but it’s not a crazy thing to feel or anything.’

‘yeah,’ sutton says. ‘it makes sense, kat. it’s nothing to be embarrassed about.’

you sigh and you feel like you’re going to cry but you don’t, not now. ‘i’ve just always been proud of my body? i guess, like. i know i’m hot as hell, i’ve literally posted like twelve billion articles and links on body positivity.’

sutton laughs a little and jane smiles. 

‘you are hot as hell,’ sutton says. ‘and your articles are dope, but, you know, this is different, kat. you’re allowed to feel something other than incredibly confident about everything all the time, you know.’

‘that must get exhausting,’ jane says.

they coax a laugh out of you and it doesn’t really make you feel any less confused, any sturdier, but they listened and you definitely aren’t alone in any of this.

‘talk to adena,’ jane says.

‘we should start using that as a hashtag for you,’ sutton suggests.

‘shut up,’ you tell them, laughing. ‘listen, this surgery ruined my abs, okay? it sucks.’

‘oh, your abs,’ jane says. ‘you mean your one ab.’

sutton grins. ‘if that’s what you’re worried about, adena definitely isn’t going to care.’

‘you’re the worst,’ you tell them, but they squeeze you in a hug on the couch and jane kisses your cheek.

‘nah, we’re the best, and you know it.’

//

you smile when adena walks in the door, because your heart gives a little flutter and it’s wild because it’s been months of this but you still feel like it’s the first time she ever made you laugh and, like, people talked about love before but you didn’t really believe them.

‘hi, baby,’ she says, walks over to you and she makes sure to meet your eyes and you nod, and then she kisses you hello. 

it’s soft and gentle and a little careful and you know you’re still healing, and you know a lot of the sex you have is like this, but sometimes you really just want to be fucked, honestly. 

‘how was your shoot?’

adena tilts her head. ‘it was productive, i think. difficult. worthwhile, though.’

‘you gonna show me some pictures yet?’

she smiles and shakes her head. ‘how was your first day back?’ she asks, putting down her bag and the sitting at the table next to you.

‘oh, you know, exhausting, but fun. i missed sutton and the fashion closet.’

adena smiles and you really wish you didn’t have this stupid cast because you want to pull her over to you to sit on your lap or something. 

‘also,’ you say, gesture to the two bags of food on the counter, ‘i stopped by miss lily’s on your way home. i know you mentioned it the other day.’

adena’s smile is worth the extra thirty minutes in traffic you spent, definitely, and she leans forward and kisses you, this time deeply, but still careful, not pushing you at all.

you press into it, though, hungry and you’ve missed her.

‘i love you,’ she says.

‘i love you too.’

she stands up and you’re about to pout when she offers her hand you helps you up, steadies you by your hips when you feel a little off balance. you don’t bother with your crutches and instead you just hop over to your bed, making her laugh, and you lie down and she follows.

you get situated again and your heart starts to race again as she kisses down your neck and her fingers go to the waistband of your sleep shorts you take a deep breath and stop kissing her.

she sits back immediately but she doesn’t move off of you, just waits.

you sigh. ‘i don’t—i don’t like my scars.’ 

it takes a lot to say aloud and you feel a little stupid and a lot vain, and you kind of want to lecture yourself or something, but adena’s face softens and she rubs the sliver of skin between your sweatshirt and shorts.

‘okay,’ she says, calm and sincere, and you feel tears building behind your eyes but you have honestly cried so much lately you will it not to happen.

‘it’s stupid,’ you say quietly, swallow and look away.

‘kat,’ she says, stroking your cheek with her thumb until you meet her eyes. ‘it is not stupid.’

‘there’s just, i don’t know. i’m supposed to be this body positive confident person and i am, but this is—’

‘—different,’ adena says. 

‘yeah.’

‘well.’ adena tilts her head a little, which you know means she’s thinking something in farsi and trying her best to convey it in english for you. ‘scars are not, um, beautiful.’

you want to recoil and your chest is tight but she looks at you like there is nothing else in the whole world more important than you, than this moment.

‘they are important, though,’ she tells you. ‘they mean that you survived. and, kat, you did.’

a tear leaks out of your eye and you hate it and adena wipes it away and then kisses the traces of it.

‘and you are beautiful,’ she says. ‘you are so beautiful.’

you don’t know anything you can say so you tug her to you and kiss her hard; even though you’re starting to cry, she kisses you back.

she reaches under your sweatshirt and you trust her and you love her so you let her lift it over your head. she looks you over fully, eyes soft and adoring, really, and then she starts to kiss down your neck. she moves along your skin, pauses to check and when you nod, offer a small, ‘yeah,’ she kisses along your scar.

it’s still a little sensitive, but you watch how reverent she is and you close your eyes and just let yourself feel how she worships you.

adena continues, kisses the healthy, unmarked skin below your bellybutton and then crawls back up your body and kisses you.

‘beautiful,’ she says.

she reaches below your waistband and takes your earlobe into her mouth and you definitely somehow get out a please, yes before a moan and it’s only been two weeks but, god, you’ve missed her.

//

‘well, i came three times and then adena got herself off on my thigh in, like, a minute,’ you say, taking a sip of your wine.

‘wow,’ jane says.

sutton lifts her glass. ‘cheers, guys!’

you laugh and they turn on the westworld finale and surgeons removed a third of your liver so you get drunk kind of quickly and you’ve watched every episode with them but you genuinely have no idea of what’s happening other than tessa thompson is hot.

you start to feel sleepy even though it’s, like, not even ten, so you call a lyft and when you get home adena helps you out of your clothes and when she hands you a t-shirt to sleep in you shrug and put it back in your dresser.

adena grins and scrambles out of her clothes and you laugh, lay down on the bed. she climbs in and rests her head on your chest.

‘you’re home early,’ she says softly, kisses the skin below your collarbone without any intent, just comfortable, sweet.

‘yeah,’ you say. ‘tired. also, i don’t understand westworld at all.’

she laughs and you run your fingers along her back lazily.

‘sleep, kat.’

‘yeah, okay.’

‘i love you.’

‘i love you too.’

//

a few weeks later you’re lounging after brunch on sunday, lazily watching insecure for the fifth time, when adena sits next to you, computer open on her lap but angled away from you.

she seems nervous so you sit up and give her your full attention. 

‘you’re gonna show me your photographs?’

she takes a deep breath. ‘if you don’t want to keep looking, that’s okay.’

you furrow your brows and she hands you the computer and it takes you a moment to understand. they’re beautiful photographs, incredibly striking, of the remnants of your subway station. not the places where the bombs went off, nothing gruesome or graphic, but instead places in the station that stayed relatively intact: missing tiles, cracks, but still, somehow, complete.

you think you might cry—again—so you hand over the computer and adena closes it, sets it aside, looks at you with big, careful eyes.

you want to tell her that you understand, but you don’t know how, so you take her into your arms and hug her tight. you feel her start to cry into your shoulder and for the first time in forever you feel able to comfort her, tender and strong.

//

a few weeks later adena paces around your apartment nervously for like thirty minutes before you pat the seat next to you.

‘what’s up babe?’

she seems to consider her words carefully before she says, ‘my project is incomplete. i started it to help myself understand what had happened and how to help you, but then, i think, it turned into a love letter to you? in the best way i know how to make one.’

‘oh,’ you breathe, your heart happy and aching all at once. ‘why is it incomplete?’

you’d just gotten your cast off and she massages your hip for a second before she takes a deep breath. ‘i think it will be complete, ready for a gallery, if i can photograph your scars, put them side by side with the other pictures.’

a month ago you would’ve been upset, angry, even, but she’s so gentle and she’s also incredibly talented and super brilliant, and the way she has made you feel about your body—before, and after, everything that’s happened—is almost holy.

‘okay.’

she sits back, searches your expression. ‘really?’

‘yeah,’ you say. 

her smile is relieved—not because of her project, you know, but because she didn’t want to upset you.

‘you better win an award or something from my artful nudes, though.’

she laughs and kisses you and you kiss down her body and when you taste her, you have never been more glad to have your cast off in your life.

//

‘wow, adena,’ jane says, as she and sutton walk around the gallery, taking in the series of photos that really did turn into something remarkable. ‘these are incredible.’

the photos of the cracks in the station are next to pictures of you laughing, candid and happy, in simple underwear and no bra. you remember feeling awkward and kind of scared but then adena had started making faces and you had rolled your eyes and told her that you weren’t an infant, but you both had started laughing and the light from your windows is gentle in the early morning of autumn, a sunday, after adena had prayed and you had had coffee together in your kitchen. your braids are spread beneath your head and you’re looking at her through the camera, not self-conscious at all.

you can see your scars, they’re clear and not hidden at all in the photos, but the whole of you is just very much in love.

adena smiles and thanks jane, and then sutton who really just has, ‘fuck, i’m gonna cry,’ to say.

adena goes to mingle because this is her show and she has to, and your friends both put an arm around your back in a funny group hug. 

‘your boobs look amazing in all of these,’ sutton says, still sniffling.

you laugh and walk with them to get another glass of champagne, go look at some of the other art in the gallery together before you drift back to your girlfriend eventually. you talk to a few people who come to compliment adena but mostly you just stand with her and listen, watch her in her element.

she has to make a speech a little later, and she thanks everyone for coming. she doesn’t talk about the photographs, and you know she didn’t want to.

what she does say, though—she looks at you, smiles a little, and says, ‘and, kat, thank you.’

you raise your glass and people are looking at you, you know, but you only notice adena, and her love, and the way she sees you.

//

months later, she does win an award, a very prestigious one.

you eat her out for an hour after you find out; you’re both exhausted and eating leftover mexican food in bed and you’re so full you lie down. 

she pats your stomach and you say, ‘food baby,’ and she laughs.

‘i’m proud of you,’ you tell her.

she smiles. ‘me too.’

[ffwriter2018]

Purple or Green

Kat and Adena have been married for three years, together for a total of five years. It’s been a tough 2 years since Adena and Kat started going through the IVF process. They thought all their dreams were going to come true on their second round unfortunately it ended in heart break. Adena was the one that wanted to carry their first child. Once they lost the baby they weren’t sure if they could handle that pain of loss again. They decided that they would give it one more try with Adena carrying if it didn’t work out they were going to look into a different way to start their family.

It was on a Wednesday when they went to the appointment to find out how the baby was doing. Both mothers to be were nervous and scared just praying that this appointment was going to be different than the last. It surely was, the doctor showed them their baby. They were far enough through the pregnancy they could find out the gender at that appointment but they chose to wait. The doctor gave them an envelope containing the gender of the baby. Leaving the doctors office was a much happier experience this time around compared to the last time. Kat’s best friends have been along through every step and she knew they would throw an amazing reveal get together. Both soon-to-be mothers agreed they would leave it in the hands of Sutton and Jane.

It was that Saturday which was the day the mothers were going to find out the their baby’s gender. Even thought Kat and Adena talked and are choosing to raise their child under no strict gender confinement. They were both nervous because everything was seeming to get extremely real. Jane and Sutton were both so excited to be able to surprise their friends like this. They girls also had an extra surprise that Kat and Adena had absolutely no idea about. “Hey maman how are you feeling?” Kat walked up behind Adena who was in their bathroom getting her hijab rubbing her belly. Adena smiled looking at Kat through the mirror. “I’m excited but kind of nervous.” Adena answered honestly. Kat was internally also freaking out but she wanted to stay calm for her wife and her baby. “How are you feeling mommy” Adena questioned her wife and saw the smile that spread across Kats face. “Mommy is panicking a lot right now cause I’m extremely eager to find out.” Kat smiles and gives Adena a kiss and hug. They leave their home and head to the hall where their friends and family are waiting to celebrate their baby all together.

The girls enter the hall and both are completely stunned with what they see. Jane and Sutton set up the entire hall in purple and green decorations, the food table was a mixture of Adena’s favorite foods and Kats. The best friends walk up to the mothers-to-be and engulf them in hugs. “Guys this is absolutely incredible thank you both so much.” Kat beams while taking in the sight of everything. “You don’t need to thank us this is what Auntie’s do for their nieces or nephews.” Jane says. “We do have another surprise though for you Adena, just remember to breath ok.” Sutton says with a smirk while walking away. Adena looks at Kat nervously while following the girls. Once Sutton moves Adena’s heart just about stopped, standing in front of her was her mother whom she hasn’t seen since her wedding. “How are you here? How is she here?” Adena asked Kat who is also crying. “I have no idea I didn’t know about this Jane, Sutton.” Kat answered honestly. “We both love you both so much and know how much family means to you. We couldn’t experience this joy with you knowing your mom wouldn’t be here. So we took Kats phone awhile ago took her number, booked her a flight and here she is for you guys special day!” Sutton says wiping her eyes when she’s smothered in hugs.

Kat and Adena were walking around talking to a few people. Nobody knew the secret Jane and Sutton knew, and it was killing both girls. Sutton and Jane call everyone to the front where all four girls were standing. “Ok so it’s the time everyone has been waiting for to find out what these two lovely ladies are having.” Jane starts “But there is something nobody knows.” She looks to Sutton to continue “Remember when you have us that envelope and we called you and asked for the doctors number to see if we could call him.” Sutton questioned Kat nodded.” Well I need you and Adena to close your eyes and we are going to put something on you both.” Kat and Adena were both skeptical but agreed. “Okay I need everyone to be quiet until they each see.” Kat and Adena look to each other and shirts said “Maman to twins” “Mommy to twins”. “Omg what?” Kat says hugging Adena and crying. Sutton brings over the envelope letter and sonogram from the doctors. “We’re have two baby’s!”Adena kisses Kat. “So are you ready to find out what the genders are?” Sutton smiles handing each mother a balloon. “Okay on the count of three each pop your balloon.” Jane states Kat and Adena are just looking at each other both in awe of the news they were just given. Everyone starts counting down “Three-Two-One” the balloons pop purple confetti falls out of Adena’s and green falls from Kats. They are having a boy and girl. Kat hugs Adena so tight and whispers in her ear”Love were having two babies. I love you so much.” They both are crying Adena kisses Kat wipes her tears away”I love you so much to.” Both start to realize why everything was purple and green. Sutton and Jane were very clever and they are extremely greatful for them. Both mommy and maman can not wait until their bundles of joys are finally in their arms.

[kadenastudio]

Kadena and a bubble bath just being cute together

“Babe?” Adena calls when she opens the door to their shared apartment and furrows her brow when she doesn’t hear her girlfriend call back like she usually does, “Kat?” she yells again, taking off her shoes, jacket and bag and placing them at the front door. 

“Hold on!” Adena hears call exclaim as she starts entering further into the building and stops in her tracks. 

She giggles quietly when she sees her girlfriend bolt out of their bathroom, hair slightly messy and hands out. “Stay there. I’m not done and you’re home early,” Kat sighs, wiping her forehead. 

“Yeah well, I was at the studio all week and I thought I’d come home early,” Adena explains, stepping forward and encircling her arms around Kat’s waist, “Do you not like that i’m home?” Adena teases. 

“Of course! I love that you’’re home honey. I just had something planned and wasn’t expecting you to be home until later,” Kat smiled, rubbing her hands up and down Adena’s arms, “Just give me one sec, okay?” 

“Okay,” Adena giggles as Kat smiles, kisses her quickly and quickly runs into the bathroom again. 

Ten minutes later Kat runs out of the bathroom with a smile on her face which makes Adena smile at how incredibly cute her girlfriend is.  

“Can I come in now?” Adena raises her eyebrow.

“Yes,” Kat smirks, extending her hand. 

Kat smiles when Adena accepts her hand and she guides Adena through to the bathroom. 

Adena’s eyes fill with tears as she sees the scene in front of her. Her amazing, caring girlfriend drew her a bath, put bubbles and rose petals in the bath and lit candles around the bathroom, “Baby,” Adena gasps, not being able to say anything else, she looks up at Kat who has a smile on her face. 

“Well, you’ve been at the studio all week and i’ve noticed how stressed you are and wanted to help you unwind and relax,” Kat explains, shrugging her shoulders. 

Adena can’t help the feel of love that she is feeling from her girlfriend right now. So she throws her arms around her love and kisses her, trying to express all the love she’s feeling at the moment. 

“I love you, Kat Edison,” Adena whispers as she pulls back from the heated kiss and rests her forehead against Kat’s. 

“I love you, too,” Kat smiles, pulling away and placing her hands on Adena’s waist, “Now, the towel is there, the bath wash, shampoo and conditioner is next to the bath and I think you are all set to go,” Kat smirks, kissing Adena’s head and starts to walk out of the bathroom. 

“What are you talking about?” Adena questions, grabbing Kat’s hand before she exits, forcing Kat to turn around. 

“I’m leaving to let you have a bath, babe,” Kat explains, smiling still. 

“I want you to have a bath with me,” Adena smiles, grabbing Kat’s other hand and intwining their fingers, “that would make me happy,” 

“Okay,” Kat smirks, letting go of Adena’s hands and starting to unbutton her girlfriends shirt. 

When Adena is undressed she slowly drops into the bathtub and emerges herself in the bubbles and rose petals, she sighs deeply. She smirks when Kat begins undressing herself and quickly slides behind her and encircling her arms around Adena’s middle. 

“You have no idea how much i’ve needed this,” Adena moans, leaning back into her girlfriends embrace and groans gratefully when Kat begins to massage her shoulders, “Mmhmm, right there, babe,” Adena sighs, Kat smirks as she massages deeper into Adena’s shoulder. 

“Do you want me to wash your hair?” Kat questions, already reaching for the shampoo. 

Kat gently massages the shampoo into Adena’s scalp and down the ends of her hair, she washes water over her lovers head and then applies the conditioner, paying close attention to her scalp again. 

“You are amazing, Kat Edison,” Adena praises after Kat washes the conditioner out of Adena’s hair. 

“Am I now?’ Kat teases, wrapping her hands around Adena’s waist again as Adena moves her head to look Kat in the eye. 

“Yes, absolutely, incredibly amazing,” Adena smiles, turning her head further so she can capture Kat’s lips and kiss her deeply. 

They only pull away when they need air. 

“Woah,” Kat gasps, pulling away and taking a deep breath. Adena giggles and snuggles impossibly closer to Kat and rest her head on Kat’s shoulder, closing her eyes. 

They get out an hour later when the bubbles have disappeared, the water gets cold and Adena’s eyes can barely stay open. 

“Okay sleepyhead, let’s get you to bed,” Kat nudges gently and moves to stand. 

“Only if you come to bed too,” Adena murmurs, not even opening her eyes. 

“Of course, honey,” Kat reassures, helping her girlfriend up and out of the bathtub. 

They dry off quickly and hop into bed because apparently Adena ‘can’t be bothered with clothes, Kat’ and lied down naked. Not that Kat mattered, it was her favourite sight. 

So she slid behind her love, wrapped her arms around her waist and smiled when she felt Adena push herself closer. 

“Goodnight Adena, I love you,” Kat whispers and chuckles when she hears Adena murmur her goodnight and I love you because

She could do this forever, with this woman. And only this woman

[starchasertonight]

“In Full Bloom”

Summary:  Kat and Adena have a whole future to build together. It starts with the first six months. (a post-series finale fic)

Chapter: 2/2

Word Count: 10,493 (total)

The second part is posted and this fic is now complete. Please let me know your thoughts, I always love to hear from you! ~BZ

[kaceysa1]

Me looking for kadena fanfics i have yet to read.

[touchedbykadena]

But really

why do we only have very few kadena fanfics

[sssammich]

etudes: a study in falling (or the four times kat fell in love, and the one time adena already did) Kat x Adena

click here for the accompanying spotify playlist