#ffs now i’m sad again | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

blublublujk · 11 months ago

Text

bound 2 (falling in love)

oneshot

word count: 6.5k

genre: fwb to lovers

pairing: yoongi x reader

summary:

You and Yoongi were okay with being friends with benefits... until you weren't.

warnings: i tried to focus on fluff (did you catch it or did i fail), explicit sexual content; unprotected sex (they make love to each other), choking and breath play (hello it's yoongi), multiple orgasms, slight overstimulation, crying (is it really my ff if there's no crying involved), creampie, very cute aftercare and i think that’s all, this is more sweet than anything lol

a.n: believe it or not this wasn't apart of my drafts i wrote this all one night because i couldn't sleep so thank my insomnia for this, it was about time i write about yoongi :D

also i noticed a lot of you are reading it was destiny and love always wins and i wish you guys wouldn't only because i plan to rewrite some of it and continue them at a further time (chaptered ffs are so hard for me rn since i don't have all the time in the world to dedicate myself to them but i promise to be back with those two series) thank you for everyone who takes time to read what i write it really means so much and your comments have been so motivating. thank you so fucking much for 2k notes on good girl, gone bad i havent seen numbers like that ever im so so grateful, thank you from the bottom of my heart. i'll try to be back one or two more times this month and happy late birthday to me hehe <3

—> m.list

—> welcome me on ao3 & twt

—-

It happened again.

Another failed date to add to the sad list of people that simply will never workout for you.

The list was growing longer as months passed. When you started this list, it was barely the start of a very hot summer. Probably the hottest it’s been in years, one can only assume the winter will not be any easier.

And you were right. Winter was only beginning and it was brutally cold. The streets were moist from the previous night of harsh rainfall.

What better time to date and settle down than now. When the world gives you rain, settle for the warm arms of a lover.

Unfortunately, you made a grave mistake thinking this would come easy. Ten first dates later and you are still very single and loverless.

It is not easy to go out during a time like now, suffering at the sight of happy couples and their stupid happy lives. Really, it should disgust you. It used to. The whole concept of devoting your entire life to someone. The need to constantly feel the tender touch of another person. The desire to fall in love and do it all over again, you get it now. At least, you think you do.

“I don’t think this is gonna work.” The words fall from your mouth in a quiet rush. The man across you sits in silence before he smiles in his loss.

“Don’t worry, I figured. It seems your mind was elsewhere. I know you don’t want to pursue anything romantically, and that’s fine with me, but is everything okay?”

Is everything okay? Well currently, yeah you’re okay. As for your heart, it’s heavy and strangely, you feel there’s a hole in your chest and it needs to be filled. That would fix things, you think. You have been single for so long that you forgot what it was like to love and cherish someone. Not that you have ever truly loved or cherished anyone, but you’ve gotten close. If a silly relationship you had in your sophomore year of high school counts. Then yes, you’ve totally been in love.

“I’m okay. Thanks for asking. I didn’t mean to lead you on, if it ever felt like I did.” The apology seems bitter in your mouth. Another failed fucking attempt. How difficult can dating be? Have you really been this disconnected with the world around you?

“Don’t stress it! Things happen. I hope you can find what you’re looking for. See you… around?” The man’s understanding response makes you feel worse. Maybe you should consider deleting Tinder and finding love naturally, if that’s still a thing in the contemporary life.

“Yeah, totally!” And like that you’re off to the next. Giving yourself plenty of time to bathe in your disappointment and miserably cry about your failed attempts at finding what you’ve been missing. Who knew dating could be so difficult?

The walk back home is just as cold as the outcome of today’s date. Your date insisted he could drive you home and if not that then pay for a cab, but you didn’t live too far from the restaurant you both met at. Though he insisted, you figured this walk could refresh you after yet another failure. You were starting to regret it as the cold wind started roughly hitting your skin. Preserving the chilly weather, you genuinely couldn’t wait to get home and wrap yourself in a bundle of warm blankets and comfortable clothes.

Cold hands struggle to open your door, you blow on them with warm puffs of breaths, soon making your way in and getting comfortable in your humble apartment.

yoon: you up?

And that, that is what made this harder. The fact that you knew there was someone completely capable of loving and caring for you the way you desired. You have seen it with your own eyes. Every time you ended up in his bed, in his arms, you felt it. Deep down you know something is there and that something beats everything else. Maybe you’re just delusional, but you look for him in everyone else and you hate it. Hate because you will never be anything more than his personal little whore that comes at the sound of his call.

me: yeah

Normally, you aren’t dry over texts, especially not with him so he’ll see right through you. You’re hoping for once, he can ignore it.

He won't.

yoon: you ok?

me: been better

yoon: wanna talk about it?

me: no, i'm ok

yoon: ok, wanna come over?

Yes, because during a time like this all you want is the comfort and warmth of someone else’s touch and Yoongi has never failed at giving that to you. But he is not yours.

And you are not his.

me: not feeling well. sorry.

yoon: sick?

A white lie never hurt anyone.

me: yeah, throat hurts

yoon: im sorry

me: it's not your fault maybe another time.

Though you really shouldn’t say that. There should be no next time. That way you don’t suffer any longer and drag him down with you, considering everything you’ve been feeling and dealing with lately. It’s not fair to Yoongi, but especially yourself.

He doesn’t reply anymore and you can’t even hide your disappointment. You aren’t disappointed at him, okay maybe a little bit at him, but mainly yourself and your recently found complicated feelings.

You and Yoongi started this whole mess a year ago, before you even realized what you truly wanted. It started off with subtle flirting here and there. They say not to mess with coworkers, given that it can complicate things at work and one should never play with their main source of income, but you did it anyway. You are still young and he only made you feel younger, like a teenage girl crushing over her forbidden crush at church. It was silly, but Yoongi made it easy.

The flirting turned to one thing, then another.

“We shouldn’t, not here.” Yoongi had you pinned outside the club you both worked at, leaving trails of wet kisses down your throat.

“Five more minutes.” His words were muffled into your skin as his hands explored your body. Yoongi’s touch was always way too soft for his own good and you fell victim to his deadly warmth.

“If Mr. Kim finds out, he’ll kill us and fire us both.” That was a bit dramatic on your part and you swore you felt the taller smiling against your neck.

Yoongi drops one last kiss on your cheek as his hot breath hits your ear. “Not if I kill him first.”

You gasped, pushing him off you with a quick smack to his chest. “D-Don’t even joke like that.”

Yoongi just laughed.

“Okay, okay baby.” The term of endearment fell from his lips too easily and you melted into the dark night. “See you after work?”

You only nodded, not being able to deny his temporary warmth and sweet presence. Then he dropped a kiss on your lips, leaving you just as quick as when he first found you. You were fucked.

From there, it only got worse for your sake. Your heart could only take so much.

Really, you should blame things on him. It was his fault you fell in love with him and his stupidly soft hands. It was all his fault! He left you no choice but to love the feel of his lips against your skin, to easily melt under his soft gaze, and find comfort in his unnecessarily warm bed. Yoongi was perfect. Everything you could ever want.

That’s why it was so fucking hard. Dating was hard enough, but after feeling Yoongi’s intimate touch, you were a complete goner. Though he was far from it, Yoongi touched you like you were his and he would fuck you like a lover would. Kissing and making love to you as if you were the most beautiful woman on Earth. It was all too much.

Fuck, you really needed to get a grip.

The knock on your door makes you jump from your couch.

Ten minutes longer and you would have fallen asleep exactly where you were lying. In outside clothes and all. You didn’t even bother taking off the outfit you had carefully planned thinking that this lucky outfit would have finally taken you somewhere. It didn’t.

“Coming!” There’s not a single person that should be outside your door, especially at this hour. Your feet make their way to the door regardless and the blood from your face drains when you see the person standing behind the door.

Quickly, you unlock your front door, rushing the taller inside. “Hurry! It’s freezing! What are you doing out here?”

Yoongi’s cheeks are surely frozen, a pink dust decorates his cheeks and the tip of his nose. It almost makes him look cute. You were far more gone than you imagined.

He hustles inside, carrying a fairly large brown bag with him. He brought… groceries?

“Took you long enough.” The taller one makes himself at home, laying his bag on your coffee table.

“What are you even doing here?” You ask again.

He ignores you. “Thought you said you were sick. You don’t look very sick?”

Yoongi looks at you with a questioning look, his eyes wander your outfit and guilt starts eating your insides.

You cross your arms, an attempt to hide yourself in shame, but what’s done is done. “I- I had plans.”

“Yeah, I see that.” He simply says, standing awkwardly in your living area.

If this doesn’t convince you to delete that forsaken app for the sake of your dignity and shameful behavior, you don’t know what will.

“Anyways, w-what brings you here?”

“Brought you some stuff.” His hand waves over to the bag he carried inside.

“Stuff?” You question, a bit dumbfounded, planted still in your place.

“Tea, cough drops, some soup I made earlier this week. Oh and flowers.” Yoongi doesn’t seem at all embarrassed or fazed about the situation. Not that he should be, but he speaks with a puff to his chest, as if he wanted to ensure you understood his every word and action. Like any concerned lover would be. As if he was yours and you were his.

Oh.

This was so so bad. For you and your weak heart. Fuck.

“I-“

He cuts you off before you even get to speak. “I don’t know if you’ll like it. It’s just some plain seaweed soup. Usually helps me when I’m sick. I’m not sure what flowers you like, or if you even like flowers. Do you? Their tulips. I did a bit of research before. My mom likes tulips. I figured you might like them too.”

He did research? Double fuck!

Yoongi was nervously rambling, now he was slightly embarrassed. Pink flushes his cheeks and it wasn’t the weather’s doing this time.

“Yoongi…” You start breathlessly and in disbelief.

“What?” He nearly stutters, his hand is shaking. He’s nervous. Who would have thought?

“Why.” Is all you manage to ask.

“You were sick.” Is all he replies. As if things were really that simple. What next? Would he come rushing to the hospital if you suddenly fell ill? God forbid, but it was a valid question.

What was going on? For a second, you entertain the idea. Maybe he fell in love between the blurry lines of this complicated relationship. Were the shared intimate memories too special for him to forget too? You weren’t sure anymore, but what did this all mean? Maybe he loves you, as much as you love him.

Thoughts keep spinning and you wish there was an easier way to turn off your brain. Not now.

“I know, but why? Why all this? Why for me?” Your vulnerability is showing and it makes you feel weak. Maybe your hands are shaking too.

“I don't understand?” Yoongi searches for the answer in your glossy eyes, he’s tempted to reach out and comfort you. Have you in his hands, but he’s too coward. He doesn’t want you to feel the shiver of his touch right now. His vulnerability peaks through as well.

Why not you? It’s always going to be you.

“I-I’m nothing to you.” There’s a shiver again and then you break.

Yoongi doesn’t care anymore. He’ll consider the consequences later. Right now, none of it matters.

His hands hold your face, ready to wipe the tears that threaten to leak from your precious eyes. He hopes his hands aren't cold anymore from standing outside for so damn long, but he couldn’t stop himself, in his selfishness and all.

His hands shake slightly, trying to stay strong as he lays it all on the table. “Y/N, you’re everything to me.” He whispers, eyes never leaving yours.

You lay your own hands on his, you feel so delicate around him when you wrap warm hands around his cold wrists.

“I-I am?” You ask between sniffles. His hands are still pretty cold, but they’ll soon warm up against your soft skin. Nobody knows how desperately you need to be touched until you are and then it’s like little fireworks spark inside your body. It consumes you in the best way possible.

“Of course. I thought I made that obvious.” His eyes are soft, different to how he typically looks at you, but you’ve seen these same eyes before. They are no stranger. It’s similar to the look he gives you when you catch him staring at you while you are deep in work. He pretends to look away as if he wasn’t admiring you from afar and you pretend that you don’t notice his curious eyes. It’s the same look he has after you both end up in heated makeout sessions, behind the rusty club you both work at. And it’s definitely the same look he has while he settles on top of you, whispering sweet words of praise and promise.

Nothing should feel different but it just does, there’s something in the way he looks down at you that lets you know that everything you’ve been searching for has always been right here. Right where you’ve been all along.

The taller leans in and you freeze struggling to keep your eyes on his. Yoongi’s thumb brushes against your cheek with a soft touch. You were fragile between his hands and he’s willing to do anything to keep his precious flower safe. “Can I kiss you?”

“Yes. Please.” You whisper back in a hurry, scared that this would be nothing but a dream. It wasn’t time for you to wake up yet.

His eyes zero-in on your lips and then he’s kissing you. It’s not much different from other times. After all, you guys have shared plenty of kisses, probably more than you should have considering you guys were friends with benefits, at most. But this time, the kiss isn’t just a careless lust-filled doing, no this time the kiss is a promise. The promise to never again allow you to question his feelings and intentions towards you.

If Yoongi has to spend his whole life making this up to you, he simply would because that’s how much you meant to him. He can’t believe he even let this go on for this long. He should have been more clear and careful, but he doesn’t regret a damn thing. Not when he has all the time in the world to repair the time lost. And especially not when his reckless actions led him to this. To you.

Yoongi’s lips are soft and bend with yours with ease. He takes his time, never in a rush. Especially not when he has you in-hand.

The taller doesn’t escalate the kiss. He keeps it sweet and gentle, like he always has been. “I’m so sorry baby.”

Kiss.

“For?”

Kiss.

Yoongi has the whole world in his hands right now as he looks down into the sparkles in your eyes and he’s never been so sure about anything in his life. “For being a fucking idiot.”

Kiss.

“It’s okay.” A kiss is shared again. “I was an idiot too. I was just scared that you wouldn’t want that with me.”

“Want what?” The taller questions, fingers trailing your face, admiring the imperfections and all.

“A relationship, I mean. You seemed content with how our relationship already was. I was afraid of losing that. Of losing you.” You admit, eyes fluttering at his touch.

“Of course, I want that. I want that and more. I-I’m not the best with relationships. I’m only saying this because I want to be open and honest with you. There’s not a second you aren’t on my mind. While at work, you are all I can see. In a crowd of a hundred, my eyes always find yours. I don’t know how to explain what you do to me. But I don’t mind. I think if I ever lost that, I would lose my mind. So I’m sorry if I ever made you feel the opposite. There’s so much more I want to say, but I just don’t know how. I want that. I want that so bad. A relationship and whatever more you give me. I might not be the best boyfriend but I’ll do whatever it takes. I- I love you.” Yoongi’s words are heartfelt and he’s so relieved. One because he’s been keeping this in for so long, any longer and he would have exploded, but second because he’s been dying to say those three words. He really does love you and Yoongi doesn’t love many people in life, but if he had to choose, it’s always gonna be you.

The tears that were creeping on your eye-lids fall prettily down your face, but Yoongi comes to your rescue. He’s quick to wipe them off your pretty face, tempted to kiss them away, but he keeps that in for now. “Y-Yoongi… I love you too. So much. I think I always have. You are so easy to love. The way you look at me, care for me, and always show up for me. That says more about you than anything else. I tried dating to get over what I felt for you, as you can probably tell, but nothing worked. It was so easy, Yoongi. So easy to fall in love with you. You’re perfect and I don’t doubt that you’ll be the best even after all this. I love you.”

“I love you too, I love you. Fuck, I love you.” Yoongi kisses you again and this time he isn’t as gentle. His lips are still soft as ever as they curl around yours. His tongue comes out and you immediately allow access, letting him explore your mouth. The taste is much better now that there isn’t anything you both are holding back. Everything down on the line and you couldn’t be happier. The hole in your heart was never empty, it was just waiting for this exact moment to remind you that you’ve always had it all.

“Yoongi.” In between breaths you call his name and Yoongi feels his knees lock. “Take me to bed.”

Yoongi just nods in a trance with the way your tone drips of arousal. A long strand of hair falls on his face when he picks you up with ease off your feet. He takes you to the place he’s had the honor to visit a hundred times before, but it’s different this time, much different.

In the process of it all, something falls and it causes you both to laugh until you run out of breath.

“I can’t believe that just happened.” You laugh into his ear. “You owe me a new lamp. My mother bought me that, you know. House-warming gift.”

“Fuck, sorry.” Yoongi mumbles near a whisper as he grips you harder like he’s afraid he might drop you next and the idea makes you giggle because you know he would never purposely hurt you. “I’ll apologize to your mother directly. Buy you and her a new lamp, whatever it takes.”

“What makes you think you are meeting my mother?” You tease with a smile on your face, watching the blush rise on his cheeks.

“Well, I figured we could, you know, if you would like–” Yoongi doesn’t often get shy about many things but he can’t keep calm around you and that kills him softly.

“I’m just teasing you.” You say and he bites his lip. “Of course you’ll meet my mother and my father and my nosy ass family. I hope you like annoying, persistent grandma’s that stuff you full. My grandma’s the worst of her kind, but she’ll love you.”

“I would love to.” Yoongi simply replies, still whispering as if you guys had to keep quiet or else you’d be in deep trouble.

“Why are we still whispering?” You whisper back, roaming fingers through his long, gorgeous hair. He needs to remind you to thank his mother personally for insisting he keep his hair long because it made him look pretty and you could never disagree. Yoongi’s so pretty.

“I-I don’t know.”

You both smile at each other before sharing another kiss. It’s so sweet and if you weren’t already off your feet, you would be floating by now. He’s gentle when letting you drop into the sheets below, he finds space between your legs and you wrap them around his hips. Lips still in contact, never losing the plushy feel.

Everything starts to feel hot. Your hips start to slowly grind against his begging for any sort of friction. But the kissing doesn’t stop.

Not when you start whining against his lips.

Not even when Yoongi starts trailing his fingers down your waist and around your curves. He teases his fingertips against your waistline, soft to the touch.

It’s not until you mewl loudly into his mouth, skillful tongue playing with yours, as you feel him start unbuckling your pants, button-by-button.

Yoongi’s eyes are heavy-lidded, his gaze burning fire. “Gonna take care of you now, is that okay?”

You furiously nod, coming up to kiss him once more, both your lips are raw and sensitive, but it gives you more of a reason to fix it with even more kisses.

He drops one quick kiss onto your mouth before he trails down your jaw. Yoongi breathes in the sweet scent on your skin, wishing he could feel you even closer. “Smell so damn good.”

His voice is raspy against your ear and it makes you blush, while you feel his hand finally touch you where you had been aching with need. “Wanna hear you.”

Breathing lightly, you whisper. “Make me.”

And of course, Yoongi makes you regret how fast you said the words because he delves his fingers forward with little resistance. Two fingers stretch you at the same time, gasping at the sudden sensation.

By now, you were molded to fit Yoongi’s fingers. On days where you were really in need, you would take four, all at once. Yoongi was best at reading every expression, every crease and scrunch to your face, especially emotions. He knew exactly how to curve his fingers, the way to build you up, and bring you back down. Yoongi knew it all and he was so lucky too.

He never anticipated it would have gone this far. It was just sex to begin with. But who were you both kidding, it was always much, much more.

Yoongi curves his fingers in the way he’s used to and watches your mouth drop, sweet noises soon leaving your lips. “Feels good?”

There’s no need to ask because he can tell. Your expression tells him everything he needs to know. That and the fact that you are dripping around his fingers but it’s sexier hearing it from you.

“Yeah… f-feels so good.” With his other hand he tugs your clothes off, leaving you bare on the bottom. Remembering the first few times is a bit embarrassing, but Yoongi always made sure to take his time and make you feel comfortable. It was special and memorable in its own way, and Yoongi felt it too.

This is unlike any first time, but it was technically the first time you could officially make love to each other until you fall lovesick and that had to be impossible around someone like Yoongi.

“Hold your legs open for me, flower.” You try to ignore the warm feeling that buzzes in your chest, but you are sure your face says it all. Without another word, you spread your legs open, tucking both hands behind your thighs.

“Flower?” You breathe out with a bit of a struggle as his two fingers continue to pump deep inside you, brushing repeatedly against your g-spot.

“Do you not like it?” Yoongi smiles slightly, biting his bottom lip while he watches you start to tremble, making the prettiest sounds.

“I do. Why the new name?” Voice a bit unsteady but it does the job. Yoongi thinks of all the times he thought you were as pretty as a flower, which really was all the time. Especially, in the way he has you right now. Pretty, pretty as a flower.

“I’ve always wanted to call you that. You’re pretty, sweet, delicate. Just like a flower.” He justifies his reasoning and you melt into puddles.

“Yoongi.” Voice sweet as honey.

“Yes baby.” He replies with ease.

“Make love to me, Yoongi.”

There was a time in his life where Yoongi believed he could live without love. How foolish of him to think so. When he met you, it was a complete three-sixty. Suddenly, Yoongi started to look forward to his shit job. He looked forward to that time between breaks where he could admire you from the back like a pinning loser. Yoongi even started to like the walks he had to take to get to work because he knew that the path would eventually lead to you. He started looking forward to tomorrow's and to the bright future that led ahead. His mom would often complain that he was wasting his life away waiting for it to start, but Yoongi thinks life truly started the day he met you.

It was a bit awkward because you couldn’t even look him in the eyes, intimated by the staff and new environment. You had previously worked in different bars so you assumed it would be no different and it wasn’t, but the intimidation of a new job was there nonetheless. Yoongi was there every step of the way. He had a crush on the new employee and you needed help on fitting in. Either way, your friendship was very platonic until it wasn’t.

Yoongi knows he should have said something along the lines “hey, maybe we shouldn't be doing this anymore. I’m in love with you and I have been since you started working here” but the stupid words never made it out. He felt it would be too much to hear and it would only make him look like a complete loser.

And you felt the same. It was silly really, because everyone around you knew it and there was no reason to fear someone as easy going and non-judgemental as Yoongi, nonetheless it brought you both here. After many failed dating attempts, you were finally happy and in the arms of someone who you truly love and want to be loved by.

There was a time in his life where Yoongi believed he could live without love, now Yoongi believes your precious, sweet love brought him back to life and he wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world.

Clothes now discarded on the floor, heavy breathing filling the room, and Yoongi could get wasted on the smell of your intoxicating perfume. “Breathe flower.”

Yoongi felt you shiver at the sound of his words, throwing your head back as he thrusts you full of cock. He pushes inside you with gentle movements, struggling to keep himself up while feeling the tug of your warm velvet-like walls.

You gasp feeling him hit your cervix in a calm, slow pace. It was breathtaking regardless of the gentle rhythm. “You’re so deep...”

“I know flower, breathe baby, breathe.” He is struggling to keep from coming inside you, overwhelmed by his own emotions as your eyes roll back, feeling the pressure rise in your belly. Without a condom, everything feels so different from other times, feeling every ridge and crease fold inside your drenching heat. You take him so nicely, like you always have. Like you’ve always belonged to him.

You don’t even notice you stopped breathing until you start feeling lightheaded and desperate for fresh air. Breathing just as much as necessary so you don’t faint, you shake your head against his hold, his eyes watch yours, observing with curiosity.

“No?”

“Mm, n-no.” You shake your head again, whimpering when you feel him kiss your cervix with his swollen tip, over and over and over. “Can– can you…”

“Can I what, pretty flower?” Yoongi rolls his hips a bit faster, feeling his orgasm build too quickly. He wishes he could have days with you like this always. Days to love and worship you from head to toe.

“Choke me.” You manage to say. “Don— don’t wanna breathe.”

Yoongi growls deep, increasing his speed even more, desperate to fill the deepest part of your glistening folds. He feels you tense underneath, the sounds coming from your mouth are loud enough for your neighbors to hear, but Yoongi stopped giving a fuck about everything around him.

He places a hand on your throat and squeezes gently, not blocking off your airways completely, but leaving you just enough air to work with. It drives you insane. The more you breathe, his rough thrusts take the air out from your lungs and the process repeats. It feels so good.

“M-more. Harder.” You barely hear your own words, but Yoongi seems to understand because his dick is moving rapidly inside you, nearly splitting you in two. You wrap both hands around his wrist, loving the heavy weight against your chest. It’ll end too soon and it disappoints you in a way, but you have all the time in the world to make this up. “G-Gonna come.”

Yoongi nods, concentrating on the way your face scrunches with pleasure. With love. The way your eyes tell him a story. God, Yoongi’s madly in love. “Come, my precious flower.”

With those final words, you come on his bare slick cock, blossoming in the blissful afterglow. Yoongi doesn’t stop thrusting inside you, but he takes his hand off your throat, kissing your face gently when he sees tears start leaking down your cheeks.

“It’s okay, you’re okay baby. Breathe for me. Slowly.” Yoongi’s words bring you back down and you throw your arms around him, crying against his shoulder. You don’t even know what invoked this strong emotion to sob your eyes out, but Yoongi allows it, caressing the back of your head. Yoongi doesn’t judge, he only holds you until you settle down. “It’s okay baby, let it out. Breathe, pretty flower.”

“C-Come inside muh-me, please.” Even after all that, you still beg for him and Yoongi wants to laugh but for your sake and the fact that it’s endearing to him, he delivers accordingly without further questions.

Right as he’s going to paint your walls white, he pushes himself up with one hand, still holding you with the other. “You sure?”

You’re confused about the sudden question, the tears still decorate your face but then you understand. “Birth control. Just come in me Yoongi, fuck me, fu-fuck.”

Yoongi doesn’t hesitate to regain his brutal pace, fucking you with purpose. Not that he doesn’t want kids in the near future, but he sure as hell doesn’t want any right now. He’s glad you are on the same page but maybe one day the conversation would spark and he wouldn’t want the mother of his kids to be anyone else but you. You were perfect for him.

“Gonna come.” That’s the only warning you get, then he’s emptying himself inside your tight walls. He doesn’t stop rolling his hips, his slit leaking puddles, until he’s pumped himself dry. With one last thrust, he groans and carefully pulls out.

He brings you with him, head falling against his chest as he continues to play with your hair, leaving kisses into your bare shoulders. “You okay baby?”

“Perfect. Feel so good.” You mumble into his skin, feeling around his waist. “I’m leaking your come into the sheets though.”

“I’ll take care of it, pretty flower.” You nod sleepily into his chest with a quiet ‘thank you’, feeling completely sated and satisfied, aching with exhaustion. “Sleep baby, I got you.”

With that, you fall deep into the shackles of sleep. Yoongi rubs your back until you completely fall asleep in his arms. He struggles to unwrap himself from your hold, but when he finally succeeds, he tucks you in and kisses your cheek a few times before getting up to clean up after the mess you both created.

He’s light on his feet, bringing a warm towel to your slick folds and wipes as best he can, being gentle so you could continue to enjoy your sleep. Even like this, you look so beautiful and Yoongi is an extremely lucky man.

Yoongi makes sure to also pick up the lamp he dropped from earlier as well. He blows out a breath of relief when he notices that the damage is nothing big and nothing that can’t be fixed. He’ll make sure to fix that as soon as he can.

While he’s out there, Yoongi places the tulips into a vase and fills it with water, placing it near a window where it could grow and blossom beautifully near the sunlight. He even cuts the tips into slants because he had heard somewhere online they last longer that way, making sure to get rid of any dead leaves and petals. Yoongi couldn’t be happier.

After he’s done with the light cleaning, he washes his hands and feels the exhaustion hit him tenfold. He’s careful when placing himself back in bed, lifting your arm and placing himself underneath you. The man smiles when he feels you curl yourself around him, sleeping soundlessly.

“I love you.” He whispers and even though you don’t say it back Yoongi feels it with the way you melt into his arms. Yoongi falls asleep easily that night.

…

“Baby.” Yoongi hears someone call him and he ignores it. Sleep calls his name louder and he doesn’t feel like waking up right now so he groans and cuddles deeper into the bedsheets below him, unaware of the life around him.

“Baby wake up.” You keep calling sweetly and it’s tempting but he persists.

“No. Don’t wanna.” Yoongi grumbles like an old man and you can’t help but to laugh. “Just ten more minutes.”

When you woke up the next morning, you were so thankful Yoongi had kept his promise. Your apartment was flawless and you were as clean as you could be. The tulips looked prettier today as the sun shined on the delicate petals. You even had time to warm the seaweed soup he brought from home and you couldn’t wait to get a taste. The smell alone is delicious and it warmed your home up nicely, you truly couldn’t wrap your head around the fact that this was no longer a dream but your reality. You could definitely get used to this.

You drop kisses onto his warm cheeks until his eyes flutter open, almost similar to a cat. “There you are.”

Yoongi pulls you into his arms again with quiet noncoherent grumbles and closes his eyes once more. “Give me ten minutes.”

“It’s already been ten.” You whisper lightly laughing.

“Oh. Ten more then.” You get comfortable on his chest and cuddle for a bit longer because you can’t say no to his cute sleepy self.

Yoongi starts to sniff the air with curiosity. “Is that the seaweed soup I brought you?”

“Mhm.” You hum. “Better get up soon before it burns.”

That manages to be convincing enough and Yoongi forces himself up, with you in his embrace.

“Wanna wake up like that forever.” He says, voice filled with sleep.

“You can.”

Yoongi snaps his heavy eyes towards you. “Are you–”

“Move in with me, Yoongi.” Yes, you skipped every step to this, but nothing was ever to code between you and Yoongi. One thing you were so sure of and that was spending the rest of your life with him. “Please.”

“I- yes, of course.” Yoongi wraps his arms around you for a tight hug, kissing your temple. “I love you. I love you and I’ll prove it to you every single day.”

“I know, I love you too. I love you.” Those three words come out from your mouths so easily and it’s nice that you no longer have to ever hold back. The man of your dreams is in the palms of your humble home and he’s in love with you. This was better than any dream.

“Let’s eat?” He says after some time of hugging and kisses being interchanged.

You nod, letting him take you there. Your kitchen is filled with the cruel aroma of food and your tummy rumbles as you sit comfortably while you wait for him to serve you a bowl of the warm tasty soup.

“I should be doing that. I’m a terrible host.” Yoongi shakes his head while smiling, the fluff of hair moving with him, then your phone dings. “Hold on, give me a second.”

Your heart drops when you see it is a Tinder notification from a man you promised to get back to. You look over to find Yoongi serving your bowl, making his way to the table. He leans in puckering slightly and you immediately lean into the sweet sudden kiss while he places your meal in front of you. This Yoongi is new because it wasn’t often you could act domestically towards one another, however this was perfect and just what you needed.

“Everything okay baby?” Yoongi asks while caressing your soft cheek and you immediately nod in his palm.

“Yes, everything’s perfect.” You reply in awe. “Thank you Yoongi, for everything.”

For letting me love you and for loving me back.

The older man just smiles and joins you for the meal.

It turns out you didn’t need Tinder after all.

You quickly delete the app off your phone and start to eat with the love of your life, conversation flows while you enjoy each other’s presence and fall deeper in love.

Alike Yoongi, you couldn’t imagine it happening any other way. You were bound to fall in love, one way or another, but that man was meant to be yours as you were meant to be his.

#yoongi fanfic #yoongi fluff #yoongi smut #bts fanfic #yoongi x reader #bts fluff #bts x y/n #yoongi x y/n #yoongi x you #bts smut

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novaursa · 29 days ago

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Unseen Fires (heartbeat)

- Summary: He loved you as long he knew how. And you never noticed it.

- Paring: sister!reader/Aemond Targaryen

- Note: This is an alternative ending. Aemond doesn't go to Harrenhal.

- Rating: Mature 16+

- Alternative (sad) ending: specter

- Previous part: him

- Tag(s): @sachaa-ff @alyssa-dayne @oxymakestheworldgoround

Aemond stood by the open window, the chill of the night air brushing against his skin as he gazed out at the darkened sky, the moon hanging low over the Red Keep. His mind raced, thoughts spinning in a whirlwind of anger and frustration. Everything had spiraled out of control since that cursed family feast. The air had become too thick to breathe, and his bitterness had grown too heavy to bear.

He was leaving. He had made the decision to go to Harrenhal, to remove himself from the suffocating pretense of court, from the poisonous smiles and whispered rumors. From you.

His fingers tightened around the straps of his saddlebag as he prepared to depart, his dragon waiting in the distance. He didn’t want to leave you behind, but he had no choice. Every time he saw you, every time he watched you with Jacaerys or anyone else, it felt like another piece of him broke away. He could no longer stand by and watch you give your attention to others while he remained in the shadows, a mere afterthought in your life.

Just as he was about to step out of his chambers, the door creaked open behind him.

"Aemond, wait," your voice called softly.

He froze, his heart skipping a beat. He knew that voice better than his own. Turning slowly, he found you standing in the doorway, your eyes wide and searching. Your hair fell loose around your shoulders, and the soft flicker of candlelight illuminated the worry etched into your features.

"What are you doing?" you asked, stepping forward, closing the distance between you. There was an urgency in your tone that he hadn’t heard before, a note of concern that twisted something deep inside him.

"I’m leaving," he replied simply, his voice colder than he intended. "There’s nothing left for me here."

Your brow furrowed, hurt flashing across your face. "Nothing left? You would leave… without saying goodbye?"

He turned away, unable to meet your gaze. "It’s better this way."

The silence between you stretched thin, the weight of everything unsaid hanging in the air. He could feel the tension in your every breath, in the way you stepped closer to him, as if trying to break through the distance he had put between you.

"Aemond," you whispered, and his name on your lips made his heart ache. "Why are you really leaving?"

He didn’t want to answer, didn’t want to admit the truth that burned inside him. He had kept it buried for so long, hidden beneath layers of restraint and composure. But now, with you standing so close, he felt the walls he had built begin to crack.

"You know why," he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. "You know exactly why."

Your hand reached for his, your fingers brushing against his in the faintest of touches. "Tell me again."

Aemond turned to face you then, his heart hammering in his chest. The anger and frustration that had fueled his decision to leave now gave way to something more vulnerable, something raw. He had spent so long pretending that he didn’t care, pretending that he could live with being nothing more than your brother. But it was a lie—a lie that had festered inside him for years.

"I can’t watch you," he finally said, his voice thick with emotion. "I can’t watch you with him. With Jacaerys. With anyone. I can’t—" His words broke off, the anguish too heavy to continue.

You stared at him, wide-eyed, the realization of his words sinking in anew. "Aemond…" you breathed, and before he could say anything more, you closed the distance between you.

Your lips were on his before he could even process it—soft, warm, and real. The kiss was tentative at first, as if you were afraid to take that final step, but when he didn’t pull away, when he didn’t push you aside, the kiss deepened.

For a moment, Aemond stood frozen, his mind reeling from the shock. He had imagined this moment a thousand times, dreamed of what it would feel like to have you so close, to taste the warmth of your lips against his. But nothing could have prepared him for the reality of it—the way your body pressed against his, the way your hand curled into the fabric of his shirt, holding him there as if you never intended to let go.

And gods, he didn’t want you to.

His arms moved of their own accord, wrapping around your waist, pulling you closer as he kissed you back with a fierceness that surprised even him. All the years of longing, of wanting, of waiting, poured into that kiss, and for the first time in his life, Aemond felt whole.

You broke the kiss first, your forehead resting against his as you both tried to catch your breath. "I’m sorry," you whispered, your voice trembling. "You spoke to me once about it, but I…"

Aemond’s hands tightened on your waist, his heart still pounding. "I doesn't matter," he said, his voice low, rough. "Not now."

You nodded, your fingers tracing the line of his jaw, your touch sending shivers down his spine. "I don’t want you to leave," you murmured. "I don’t want to lose you."

Aemond’s heart swelled at your words, the ache that had been there for so long finally beginning to ease. He pressed a kiss to your forehead, his hand coming up to cup the back of your neck. "Then I’ll stay," he whispered against your skin. "I’ll stay for you."

You pulled him into another kiss, this one softer, slower, as if you were making up for all the time you had both lost. Aemond could feel the warmth of your breath, the softness of your lips, and he let himself get lost in it, let himself forget about the anger, the bitterness, the jealousy that had driven him to the edge.

All that mattered now was you, and the way you held him as if he was something precious, something worth holding onto. He didn’t care about the rest—about Jacaerys, about his family, about the endless power struggles and fights for dominance.

For now, in this moment, it was just you and him. And that was enough.

As the night deepened, you stayed wrapped in each other’s arms, the world outside forgotten. Aemond knew there would be challenges ahead, that the storm brewing within your family would not simply vanish. But for the first time in what felt like an eternity, he wasn’t afraid.

He had you, and that was all that mattered.

The future could wait. For tonight, Aemond was exactly where he wanted to be.

#house of the dragon #hotd x reader #hotd #hotd x you #hotd x y/n #fire and blood #game of thrones #asoiaf #a song of ice and fire #hotd aemond #prince aemond #aemond one eye #aemond targaryen #aemond x reader #aemond x you #aemond x y/n

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sweet-art-o-mine · 30 days ago

Note

HI POOKS EBTUI5JEVTJWGUESN

Is it okay to request some Yuuji x chubby reader ff? I dont really mind if it's smut or fluff, but it would br nice if it's both! TANKEW KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK MWAH

[[I’m so sorry this is like a billion years (9 months oops—) late. I got sad again, gang. Also started college again, and got super busy. I’m writing this like a fever dream at 3am, so I hope you can forgive any mistakes, or ooc moments. This idea was surprisingly difficult because I didn’t want to make it seem like size was an issue for the characters, and I don’t usually include body size indicators when I write haha but I really did try. I hope you can enjoy this little drabble of Yuuji being a total sap for his pretty gf while I get my writing mojo back! - Ami]]

Loverboy (Yuuji Itadori/Reader)

Summary: Yuuji loves his pretty girlfriend…maybe a little too much? Word Count: 1.2k Warnings: NSFW (slightly), slight implied affectionate obsession

There was something about the plush thick of your thighs that practically had Yuuji salivating. His hands run the expanse of your soft tummy, cuddled up to your side like he was glued to you, but his eyes focus in on the little glimpses he catches of your legs under your shorts.

His teeth sink into the skin of his bottom lip, wishing he was brave enough to try and pull you impossibly closer - to grip you by the dip in your thighs and slot himself between your legs for the comfiest cuddle in the world.

The thought of your weight pressing down on him sounded so comforting, and the idea of your soft skin against his own could send him into orbit. If he thought about it for too long, he worried he wouldn’t be able to keep himself under control.

He swallows thickly after another failed attempt to rip his attention away from your bottom half, completely unsuccessful at paying attention to the movie you picked out. I mean, honestly, how could you expect him to watch some silly drama when your cute ass was literally right there? Looking at you was way more interesting than any movie.

He still couldn’t believe you had agreed to that first date with him almost six months ago. He had almost fallen down a flight of stairs chasing after you just to beg for your number. He would’ve groveled at your feet for a chance, honestly. He balked when you turned him down at first - if you looked closely enough, you could probably see his heart shattering into a million pieces - but his invitation to the tiny, family-owned movie theater in the next town over wasn’t the most comfortable date idea.

As much as you liked the idea of getting to know the guy who nearly cried when the words, “sorry, but…” left your pretty lips, the theater chairs were too small and dug into the flesh of your thighs, or the arm rests pressed against your sides in a way that had you constantly shifting to at least feel a little less squished.

Thankfully he seemed to catch on pretty quickly, because he almost instantly suggested coffee instead (after pulling himself together). To which, you agreed.

And nearly half a year later, Yuuji was still obsessed with you; the curve of your hips, the softness of your tummy, and the squish of your thighs. God, you were perfect.

He slides his arms a little further around your waist, pulling you closer with practiced ease, like you weighed nothing. He presses a kiss to the space between your shoulder blades, unable to properly put his feelings into words, even now. But that was okay, he had always been particularly good at showing it.

“Hm?” You hum to get his attention, eyes never leaving the TV screen as you question his sudden display of affection. The only answer you get is another kiss to the round of your shoulder, and you turn your head to glance back at him, letting your curiosity get the better of you. “Yuuji?”

“Sorry,” He mumbles against your skin, pressing a few other quick kisses to your back and shoulder - daring enough to briefly kiss the back of your neck. His bouts of sudden affection were something you were no stranger to, but your eyes meet his without hesitation, and you pause briefly and the way his pupils are blown wide with adoration as he looks at you.

“Are you okay?” You can’t help but ask, like you can’t believe he’s looking at you with that much love in his eyes. No one had ever looked at you like that before Yuuji. Somehow, he made you feel so unbelievably loved, and you weren’t sure you did anything in particular to deserve that.

Of course, to him, you didn’t have to. “Fine,” he answers, shifting behind you just enough to lift his upper half, leaning over your side to kiss at your cheeks, slowly gravitating lower until he reaches the corner of your lips. “You look so pretty…”

“I’m just wearing shorts and a tee-shirt,” you giggle softly, turning your head until your lips meet his in a chaste kiss. “Nothing special,” you muse. He doesn’t seem to care that it’s ’not special’. Just the fact that you’re his girlfriend is special enough to make him feel like he was going crazy.

The way your eyes soften as you look at him, and your pretty lips pull into a smile, paired with your slightly-exposed-but-far-too-tempting skin does something to his brain. He felt like he was melting, every breath leaving him pliant in your hands. A willing victim to your killing beauty.

His heart is beating loudly in his chest, and his blood seems to be rushing lower before he even notices. For some reason, his brain briefly conjures the image of the first time he really kissed you and tortures him with the reminder of how he finished in his pants just from the feeling of making out with you.

He tries to subtly shift his hips away from you, not wanting you to notice the quickly growing arousal in his shorts, but you knew him too well, and a playful smile creeps up on your pretty features.

“You know...you don’t seem fine,” you hum, quickly glancing him over as heat saturates his reddened cheeks. His hormones always seemed to get the best of him when he was so close to you - constantly at war with wanting to be so close to you it would be nearly impossible to separate, and the fact that if he dared to get to close, he’d be playing peek-a-boo with his erections.

“Totally fine,” he replies, attempting to sound cool and collected as he rips his gaze away from you to stare aimlessly at the TV. The TV he was very obviously not paying any attention to despite gazing straight at it like he was paid to do so.

“Feeling hot?” You try to suppress a little laugh, obviously finding his surprisingly innocent reactions adorable. You shift on the couch to face him before sitting up, straddling his legs in a way that instantly has his eyes wide and mouth open.

He almost protests - you shouldn’t be on top of him like that, you obviously look too good! What if his brain turns to jelly because of you? What will he do if Gojo-sensei and the others make fun of him for getting even dumber?

He can feel his heart racing, brain imagining a mile a minute; your flushed, ecstasy-filled face, his cock pressed deep into you. He can almost imagine what your voice would sound like as you climaxed when the touch of your hand dancing around the waistband of his pants snaps him out of his daydreams.

“Wha—? Wait!” He almost whimpers, face hot as he watches you slip your hand under his shirt, lightly tracing the definition of his abdomen before drawing closer to the start of his happy trail poking out of his shorts. “Oh, God,” his breath hitches in his throat as he looks at you, and he’s practically twitching in his pants with anticipation for what you might do next. He could feel the growing dampness in his underwear. “Are you sure…?”

His whole body twitches under your touch as you slip your hand into his shorts. “Let me make your dreams come true?”

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deathliestc · 1 year ago

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Shower Me With Your Kisses

summary: You're going out to hang with Nella and Adeola but before going out, Sharky wants cheek kisses.

warning: none

Sharky x f!reader

𖦹 ⋆｡°✩ —<3— ✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩—<3—✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩—<3—✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹

On this delightful day, bathed in sunshine, you, Nella, and Adeola decided to go shopping.

You were at your house, in your room, waiting for Nella since she offered to pick you up along with Adeola. You were facing the mirror, putting on your light pink lipstick as the last touch, and smiled at yourself with confidence.

(Sound of phone ringing)

Your phone rang, and you immediately answered it. “Get your ass out, I’m outside.” Nella’s direct voice came through. With a chuckle escaping your lips, you grabbed your belongings and were ready to go out.

Stepping out of your room, you found your boyfriend Sharky, lounging on the couch, petting your cat with an air of boredom. You approach him with your hands on your hips. “Nella’s outside already, you will be okay on your own right?” You ask him,

Sharky shifted his gaze to you, his mouth fell open at the sight of you. He was utterly speechless at your jaw-dropping beauty until he forgot to respond to your question. You snap your finger and bring him back to reality, “Babe!”

“Oh what— What were you saying again?” He stuttered, his eyes scanning you up and down, still admiring you. In response, you crossed your arms and let out a sigh.

From his laidback position, Sharky sits up and holds your hands. “Sorry baby, you’re just so beautiful…” he persuades, kissing your hand.

A warm smile graced your face. “Alright, it’s okay,” you said, forgiving him. “Nella is outside already, I’m going out right now okay?” You stated,

With a playful tone, he teased, “No kiss?” while tapping his right cheek with one finger, silently requesting a sweet gesture. You chuckled and playfully rolled your eyes with a smirk on your face. Leaning in, you gave him a small peck on his right cheek, receiving a chuckle of satisfaction from him. “Alright, I’m going now.” You were just about to walk away but are immediately stopped by Sharky grasping your wrist. “One more kiss pleaaasee,” he begged,

You once again playfully roll your eyes and give him a small peck on his left cheek. “Nella is going to get mad at me,” You said, chuckling.

“More moree,” He begged once more,

Biting your lower lip, you hesitated for a moment. However, Sharky’s sad face and clingy demeanor melted your resistance and you gave in, planting two kisses on both of his cheeks in the hope that would be enough.

But no, it was never enough for him. “Y/n more, please.” With annoyance, you decided to indulge him further, planting kisses all over his face. His heartwarming laugh that he lets out whilst you’re kissing him melts you like a cube of ice. As a finishing touch, you kiss him on the lips.

Pulling apart, you sprinted towards the door, “No more!” you yelled before he could protest. In a rush, you hastily put on your heels and burst out of the house, shouting, “Bye babe!” before leaving.

Sharky laughed at your playful behavior, he grabbed a pillow and hid his face. Blushing and chuckling to himself, he couldn’t help but think about how adorable you were.

—

𖦹 ⋆｡°✩ —<3— ✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩—<3—✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩—<3—✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹

HEYYY WADDUPPP HOW IS ITTT??? So hey anyways I decided to write Sharky ff today, I was supposed to write for Kenniko but honestly if I didn’t write for the others it would make my masterlist looks empty so I was like “okayy, sharky ff then” 😶‍🌫️ SO ANYWAYS YEAHH UHM THATS ALL?? BYE BYE DONT FORGET TO REQUEST MORE MWAH BYEE!

#king kenny #niko omilana #beta squad #kingkennytv #aj shabeel #chunkz #sharky x reader

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gotskamstuff · 4 days ago

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Maybe I need to write my own S5 fanfic in which JJ comes back and Kiara is by his side again, just to get over this… ‘cause I gotta be honest, one of the things that’s crushing my soul the most is how at the moment I can’t even read Jiara fics, I can’t see JJ’s face on my timeline and not even read his name without seeing him die in front of my eyes and remember that he doesn’t have happiness anymore.

It just makes me so fucking sad that I can’t even think about my comfort character not even in ff anymore and not even watch his scenes back in my comfort show because all I can think about is how he doesn’t exist anymore and he can never be there anymore, never be part of the story anymore and never have that beautiful future we all imagined for him. They took what brought the most happiness to us and turned it into what brings us the most pain. That’s why I don’t even find enjoyment in OBX anymore altogether, they took away what brought that joy.

What I hate the most is how what was my comfort and one of the things I was most passionate about just some days ago, now it’s completely ruined for me. I loved writing and reading for Jiara, it brought me so much comfort and joy and now I can’t bring myself to do it, one of my favorite things to actually do in my daily life and one of the pieces of fiction I was most attached to just ripped away in 5 minutes.

I’ll have to try and write an alternative version in which JJ is still here and has that life he deserves just to cope, even just for myself so I can go back to connect with my comfort character and go back to enjoy those stories in which HE LIVES LIFE and that I loved through the years and that spark my writing.

Maybe I’m wrong and I should just be speaking for myself but I think that for many of us they killed Outer Banks with JJ.

#I REFUSE TO LIVE IN A WORLD WHERE JJ IS DEAD #GIVE ME MY COMFORT CHARACTER BACK 😭😭😭#BRING BACK JJ #outer banks #obx #jj maybank #kiara carrera #jiara #jiara ff #jiara fic #jj x kiara #obx netflix #obx4 #obx s4 #outer banks netflix

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sarahowritesostucky · 9 months ago

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📖"Temporary Custody"

Rating: Explicit

Pairing: Steve x ofc x Bucky; Steve x Bucky

Word Count: 5461

Tags: Dom/sub, bdsm au, dom Bucky, sub reader, hurt/comfort, enemies to lovers, gay sex'n'stuff, straight sex'n'stuff, Steve being a literal Golden Retriever, mental health issues, dub-con, forced submission, referenced childhood abuse and resultant mental health issues, bakery au, m/f/m, gentle domination, total power exchange

Summary: The stigma and shame of being a submissive has kept Mary unfulfilled and in the closet her whole life, until an inciting incident leads to Bucky and Steve taking her in and giving her everything she was always too afraid to ask for.

Trigger warnings: This story contains themes of eating disordered behavior, body image issues, childhood abuse, self-harm, and alcohol abuse.

Wait! I haven't read an earlier chapter of this fic! Story Masterpost

8. Banana-Dulce Cheesecake

Bucky

It occurs to him to tell Steve about the kiss later that night, when Steve is three fingers deep in him and Bucky wants some leverage to make him get in him already. He’s told him four damn times already to move things along.

“Sweetheart,” he coos, making an effort to control his voice so that Steve doesn’t know just how well he’s getting at his prostate like this. “If you don’t listen to me and get your dick in me in the next fifteen seconds, I’m tying you up and riding the dildo while you watch.”

Steve’s rhythm falters and his eyes widen, because he knows his husband and he knows it’s no idle threat. Sexual denial is one of Bucky’s favorite cruelties. “Fuck,” he whispers. “Okay, okay.” His fingers leave a sad absence inside of Bucky, but he gets right to work in reaching for the lube bottle to slick himself up.

“Aht, forgetting something?” Bucky raises his eyebrow and watches Steve huff in exasperation as he stretches across the bed to reach for their beside drawer. Bucky takes the opportunity to smack his ass, enjoying the slight jiggle and the clenching muscle. “Good boy,” he purrs, as Steve comes back with a condom in hand.

Even when he’s fucking Bucky, Steve isn’t allowed to come inside of him. Only Bucky gets the privilege of leaving a load up inside his husband's ass, a possessive reminder left behind to slide out, slow and filthy. He watches Steve roll the latex down his dick and then give himself a few indulgent pulls with the lube. He's red and throbbing, and Bucky can tell by the way he keeps sucking his bottom lip back into his mouth that he’s feeling very sensitive. “That feel good, Honey?”

“Nngh.”

“That’s enough. C’mere.” He hooks his heels in behind Steve’s ass to urge him forward. Steve drops his dick and climbs over him, settling into the spread of his legs and reaching down to line himself up. Bucky feels the wet drag of his cockhead over his hole.

Obedient boy, he thinks with a smirk. But it slips off his face when Steve starts to push in. He inhales sharply through his nose and closes his eyes as he focuses on letting Steve in. “Ungh,” he grunts quietly, brow furrowed at the stretch.

“You okay?” Steve’s hovering, not pushing any further. Waiting for permission.

Bucky swallows and nods, because he is okay, but goddamn. Sometimes he forgets just how big his Stevie really is. (No better reminder than to have it shoved up his ass.) “Yeah,” he pants, sliding his hands up the backs of Steve’s arms and feeling up the tension in his triceps—he’s straining so beautifully, trying so very hard to hold still for him. It makes Bucky melt when he opens his eyes again and gets a look at the beautifully pinched expression on Steve’s face.

Oh, his golden boy.

“C’mere, you,” he husks, pulling him down by the jaw for a kiss. It forces Steve’s cock a little bit further into him, and he groans at the stretch. “Ff-uck, uhn, Ssteve.”

“Sorry, sorry.”

He shoves his tongue into Steve’s mouth like it’s payback for the way he’s invading his body right now, the lewd, wet swipe of his tongue a counterpoint to Steve’s dick. Bucky just wants to get inside his man, any way he can. Steve makes a filthy, tortured noise when their tongues roll together, and Bucky relishes it. He growls and drives their mouths together again and again, making it sloppy, taking Steve’s breath away, tongue-fucking his mouth before he gets any real chance to start fucking him.

“Buck,” Steve breathes, the word wet on his lips as he holds himself still. He’s looking so pleadingly at Bucky, near-pained self restraint and begging eyes that make Bucky want to destroy him. “Please. I gotta. Gotta move.”

Bucky feels that ever-familiar dark thrill zip through him. “Yeah?” he asks, mock sympathy lacing his tone. He strokes Steve’s hair. “Is that what you want, big guy? You wanna bury that fat cock up in me? Wanna go to town?” Steve nods, of course he does, and Bucky forces one more harsh, unyielding kiss onto him before he pulls back and relents. “Okay Baby, push it in a little. Go slow. Make yourself feel good.”

Steve sags with relief, instantly sinking deeper into Bucky’s body. He goes slow like he’s been told, easing in each of the seven plus girthy inches he has to give, and since Bucky’s just put up with God knows how much time and lube and fingers softening him up for this, it doesn’t hurt.

It’s just so fucking much.

Steve waits once he’s settled all the way inside, because he knows he needs permission to start thrusting. Bucky strokes a tender thumb just under his eye, taking the time to soak up his expression, his pretty features when he’s feeling good like this. “You’re the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen, y’know that?”

Steve grins shakily and knocks their foreheads together. “That why you married me?”

“Mmm. Had to do somethin’. Couldn’t let somebody else get at you.” Bucky grinds up, feeling Steve’s hot length rub inside him, so big. “Oh, Honey.”

“Fuck,” Steve says tersely. “Fuck, Bucky please. Say I can. C’mon Baby.”

Bucky nods, and that’s all the permission Steve needs. He starts moving, thrusting into Bucky with short, deep rolls of his hips. Steve’s a goddamn savant when it comes to getting at Bucky’s sweet spot with his dick, and now’s no exception. Bucky hisses as sparks fly up his spine, his balls pressed deliciously by Steve’s pubic bone every time he rocks in deep. It’s so damn good. “S-sumthin happened today,” he says, stuttering over his words in a way he almost never does.

“Mm.” Steve starts necking at him, humming in acknowledgement. “What?”

“With Mary,” Bucky grunts. “I—nnh—I kissed her.”

Against his neck, Steve makes this tiny, appreciative sound that just about makes Bucky's blood boil. His hips jolt down in an uncontrolled thrust. “Yeah? She liked it?”

“Yeah,” Bucky breathes, a dirty thrill shooting through him at this: at talking about someone else while Steve fucks him. Talking about her. “Yeah she did. She felt so good, Stevie. Felt so nice in my arms.”

Steve groans again. "Tell me."

“Wanted more, God, I wanted to squeeze her, y’know? Trap her. Right up between me and you.”

“Fuck, Bucky. Uhn.”

“Yeah.” They’re grinding filthily now, all firm and deep, skin slapping quietly, Bucky’s legs wrapped up around Steve’s waist to draw him in hard again and again. “I wanna do something about it,” he pants. “Want to have her.”

Steve moans and nods, his face pinking from the effort, from the thought of the three of them together. This, the idea of the two of them in a three-way relationship with a woman, used to be one of their biggest fantasies that they’d talk about. “Can we?” he asks, looking to Bucky for permission. Always to Bucky. It gets him hotter than anything, so in love with his man.

“Yeah,” he says, reaching down to grab handfuls of Steve’s flexing ass, urging him on. “Yeah we can. We’ll take her apart. Fuck her so good.”

“Oh, God. How?” Steve’s back to kissing on his neck while he grinds into him, dirty pants against sucked-wet skin going straight to Bucky’s dick. “Tell me.”

“Mm, I dunno. Maybe you can hold her, huh? Hold her open while I go down on her. Or maybe we’ll—ugh, shit—maybe we’ll both have her at the same time, yeah? You behind her and me in front, taking turns dipping our cocks in her ‘til she screams.”

Steve groans, his hips slowing and his head sinking over Bucky’s shoulder—He’s close and doesn’t want to come.

Bucky bites sharply at his neck. “Did I say you could stop? Keep fucking me.”

Steve, trooper that he is, whimpers and gets back to it. Bucky grits his teeth, angling his hips into the thrusts just right so that his prostate is getting it good. “Aw, fuckyeah. Like that, Honey, juust like that. Shit. You’re gonna make Daddy cum, y’know that?”

Steve whines, his hips stuttering at the words. Bucky rarely calls himself “Daddy” when they’re together, it’s usually something he only utters when he’s domming a sub. But with Steve topping like this, Bucky needs the extra dominance. The growled words get to Steve too though, and he starts to come, shoving harder and uncoordinated. “Ohn ... shit,” he whimpers, the high pitched, desperate sound of it making Bucky’s cock pulse dangerously.

He growls and smashes their mouths together, shoves his flesh hand down between their bellies and grabs himself, starts stroking off hard and fast as he feels Steve’s jerky final thrusts. They finish seconds apart, with Steve still grinding his orgasm out as Bucky’s cock starts shooting up his belly and over his knuckles. “Uh, ughn, godyeah …”

They slump against each other with exhaustion once it’s done, panting against skin and reveling in the aftershocks. Steve eventually takes the initiative to pull out, getting rid of the condom and snuggling back up against Bucky’s side. Bucky hums and wraps his arm around him, pressing a kiss to the edge of his temple. “S’good,” he mumbles, letting Steve pull the blanket up to cover their legs, even though they haven’t even wiped off yet. It feels too good to move right now.

“So,” Steve says a few minutes later, his voice softened and lax from the afterglow. He’s got his head pillowed on Bucky’s chest, and Bucky begins to play idly with his hair. “The Mary thing.”

Bucky inhales deeply, his chest rising and falling underneath Steve’s cheek. “Yeah. The Mary thing.”

“What’s the plan?”

He doesn’t answer for a long time, picturing various scenarios in his sated brain. “Hell if I know.”

Bucky

Steve’s already back from his ass-o’clock morning jog and putzing around the kitchen by the time Bucky has finished dressing for work and emerges from the bedroom. He hears (and smells) the coffee pot percolating, and sighs gratefully as he walks into the kitchen to join him. “Mornin’ babe. Thanks. for getting that started.”

Steve gives him a cheerful peck on the lips as he passes to open one of the upper cabinets. “There’s a piece of cheesecake in the fridge for you,” he says.

“Cheesecake?” Bucky’s slightly distracted by the shape of Steve’s muscular back through his tight Under Armour top as he stretches to reach his preferred to-go mug. “For breakfast?”

“I may have mentioned that it’s your favorite dessert of all time.” Steve shoots him a knowing smile when he turns back around. "Enjoy the view?"

"You know it," Bucky says, shameless. "I'll have to have a talk with her about making cheesecake. The first step is admitting you have a problem, and I have a problem."

Steve snickers and goes to grab the coffee pot and fill the mug. “At least take it to work with you for lunch. She’ll be bummed if you don’t.”

“Sure.” In the fridge, Bucky discovers a clear plastic clamshell box with a single slice of cheesecake inside. Previously unaware of any hunger, his stomach suddenly turns over in a growling vote of confidence for the cheesecake. “Damn,” he mutters, reaching in and pulling the clamshell out. “So that’s what the banana threats were for.”

“Yep.” Steve chuckles. “I already had a piece. And Buck:” He turns around and looks at him with theatrically wide eyes. “It’s really good.”

“Oh, I have no doubt.” Bucky checks the time on his phone, decides that he has enough time to sit down and eat it there before he leaves for work. He goes to grab a fork from the silverware drawer. Seated on the stool at the breakfast bar, his eyes slide shut as the first bite of dense, creamy goodness slides over his tongue. “Oh, sweet baby Jesus,” he moans. “Caramel.”

“I know, right?”

He opens his eyes again and gives Steve a withering look. “We’ve gotta set some boundaries for ourselves. Or she’ll have us rocking dad bods in no time.”

Mary’s laugh sounds from the hallway just before she appears, dressed in sneakers and workout clothes. “With the way you two work out? Yeah right.” She shoots a cheerful finger gun in Bucky’s direction. “And it’s dulce, not caramel.”

“Oh. Well I stand corrected, then.”

“Basically the same thing as American-style caramel.” She makes a face. “Which hardy counts at all. Just wait until I make you a real caramel. Where the sugar’s actually cooked dark enough to taste.” She nods with an adorable amount of conviction. “Your mouth’ll know the difference.”

“I’m sure it will,” Bucky drawls, looking her over with the same sort of appreciation that he’d just done with Steve. Mary wears leggings on a regular basis, which is always very enticing, but her gym leggings are even tighter, and it’s a total cocktease. Bucky waits until she has her back turned before he lets his gaze drop to her hips and ass. Jesus, help him. “You going to the gym?” he asks, knowing that it’s her day off.

“Yeah,” she huffs, going over to grab her jacket from the catchall. “I’ve gained so much weight since Halloween, it’s not even funny. Got about fifteen pounds to work off now. Blegch.”

Bucky actually puts his fork down, he’s so disturbed by the casual way that she throws it out. “What?” he says, and Steve echoes him with a stifled noise in his throat that basically means the same thing. “Fifteen pounds?” He lets his eyes drag over her body, mouth agape. “Mary, wait.”

“What?” She’s shrugging her jacket on with a humorless laugh. “It’s true.”

“No it is fucking not,” Bucky snaps, and at hearing his tone, she stops laughing. “Mary,” he says sternly. “You do not need to lose any weight. And certainly not fifteen pounds. Jesus. That’s ludicrous.”

She turns around with an incredulous expression. “Seriously? I literally just heard you complaining about dad bods. Have you seen yourself? And you’re gonna talk to me about what’s ludicrous?”

Bucky frowns at how defensive she’s gotten and how fast. “Mare,” he says, trying to soften his tone. “You look great. Now I’m fine with you going to the gym if you want, but let’s not get out of hand, here.” Something about the tense determination in her features sets off alarm bells in his head. “You should wait to go to the gym with Steve when he goes in the afternoon,” he decides, making it an order. “You don’t need to be going by yourself.”

Her entire face screws up. “Excuse you,” she scowls. “I’m not a child. I can go to the freakin’ gym by myself.”

“No,” he says firmly. “I want you to wait.”

For a split second, he sees her expression smooth over at how calmly and firmly he’s said it—her own natural submissive reaction to a direct order from him. But that quickly bleeds back to astonished anger. “Sorry, Daddy, but I’m ready to go now. I already took my pre-sup and I’ll just waste it if I—”

“Pre-sup?” he hisses (forcing himself to ignore the ‘Daddy’ thing—holy shit). “What supplements are you taking?”

“None of your business!” She laughs meanly, and Bucky sees Steve shift out of the corner of his eye at how quickly this is devolving. “Jesus. I’m a grown woman, Bucky.”

“I know that, Mary,” he grits. “Now take your coat off and wait for Steve.”

“No.”

“Have you even had any breakfast?” he growls.

“I don’t like to eat before a workout,” she says, grabbing up her purse from the catchall.

“Mary,” Steve pleads, looking worriedly at Bucky. “You should have something for fuel. C’mon, let me make you a piece of toast at least.”

She huffs, shouldering her purse and heading for the door. “You guys’ bread has like a hundred and thirty calories a slice. No thanks. I’m fine.” She unlocks the deadbolt and reaches for the doorknob.

Bucky lets loose his full Dom-voice when he warns, “Mary, don’t you open that door.”

Her shoulders visibly tense, as if she’s fighting off the full-body urge to obey him. “I’ll be back in a couple hours,” she says, then pulls open the door and leaves.

Bucky stares, furious. “A couple of hours?!” The barstool’s legs scrape against the floor as he hastily pushes out from the counter, intending to go after her.

“Babe, wait. No.” Steve stops him with both hands on his shoulders. “That’s not a good idea.”

“She just willfully disobeyed me!” Bucky snarls. “I can’t let that go!”

Steve’s fingers curl over his shoulders in a squeeze and he ducks his head to fix him with a meaningful look. “Buck, hey, take a deep breath. You’re not handling this well.”

The message is clear. This is the way Steve talks to him when he’s trying to calm him down from domspace—and not the good kind of domspace, either. Bucky jerks away from his hold, but Steve arches an eyebrow, and so Bucky takes a few deep inhales and exhales, glaring at his husband the whole time he’s doing it. “She can’t get away with behavior like that,” he reiterates once he’s done. He forces his tone to be more calm so that Steve can’t hold it against him. “That was out of line. She needs to be corrected.”

“I know,” Steve says, still looking at him cautiously. “But we don’t have a discipline plan in place, so what’re you gonna do? Go grab her in public and drag her back here kicking and screaming?”

Bucky's jaw works in frustration. “No," he grits. "No, that won't work."

“Good. I'm glad you can see that.” Some of the tension releases from Steve’s shoulders, and Bucky instantly feels bad. Poor Steve. He’s already married to one erstwhile/sometimes mental case, and now he’s got another one on the extreme opposite end of the spectrum to deal with.

“Sorry,” Bucky says tightly, turning away in embarrassment. He can still feel the ticking of his pulse in his veins, and the desire to control pulled tight throughout all his muscles. “Sorry,” he says again, going back to sit at the breakfast bar.

“It’s okay, Babe.”

He scoots back in to the counter and grabs his fork, moodily spearing another bite of the cheesecake. His thoughts still linger on the showdown with Mary as he chews, and after he swallows he mutters, “The hell’s gotten into her?” Normally she’ll go soft as a stick of butter the second he starts talking sternly at her, but this time she’d seemed to actually harden against him the more he tried it.

Steve comes over with the to-go mug, emptying a Splenda packet into it. “You think it has anything to do with you kissing her?”

Bucky frowns, not having considered that. He shakes his head grumpily. “No. She’s been coming down every night. It doesn’t make any sense for her to be acting like this."

“Okay, but Babe … maybe we should try to get her in to see Linda this week. See if there’s something she needs that we’re not—”

“What she needs is a quick trip over my lap,” he growls, left hand flexing. “She’s bratting.”

“She does like to go to the gym,” Steve hedges, but he shuts up when Bucky shoots him a withering glare. “Yeah, okay, maybe you’re right.”

“Damn right I’m right. Call the Center today. Try and get us in. The sooner the better.”

Steve nods. “And what do you suggest I do about her when she comes back?”

Bucky grunts and eats the last bite of cheesecake n his plate, vaguely aware that he would’ve savored it a lot more if he wasn’t so riled up over Mary’s behavior. “Just leave her alone. You’re right: we don’t have a discipline plan in place.” (Though he plans to correct that very soon.) “We’ll sort it out at this next visit. Linda already said she has strong indications for impact play.”

Steve winces. “Why do they need to put the word ‘play’ after everything?” Bucky shrugs, and Steve looks rueful. “You know she’s gonna throw a fit when you bring it up.”

“I know.” And he really doesn’t care. A dark thrill of dominance zips through Bucky at just the idea of putting Mary over his knee, of trapping her wrists at her lower back and holding her down, giving her a good spanking until she’s crying and grinding and sorry. “She’ll learn real quick that it’s what’s good for her. That girl needs consequences like a fish needs water."

“Uh huh.” Steve seems almost amused, but he holds up his hands again when he gets another glare from Bucky. “I’ll call and make an appointment, I will,” he promises. “But what about you, Babe?”

“What about me?”

Steve gives him a look. “You could stand to go in yourself.”

“I’m fine.”

His eyes slip down to Bucky’s left hand. “Babe ...”

Bucky looks down—Somewhere in the past few minutes, he’s bent the fork in his fist a little bit. Huffing, he sets it down.

“Take the morning off and go get a session in with one of the Pros,” Steve coaxes. “Spare your poor coworkers.”

Bucky scoffs and takes his plate to the sink to rinse it. “No. I’m fine.”

“Uh huh.”

“I am,” he insists, giving Steve a warning look when it seems like he’ll argue further. “Steve,”

“Okay, okay.” Steve holds up his hands in surrender. “Just trying to help.”

Bucky softens, feeling bad. “C’mere, you. Hey, I’m sorry.” He gives Steve a big hug, and then a kiss that’s equal parts possessive and apologetic. They part, and he smiles a little, nudging Steve’s nose with his. “You still having fun in the nuthouse?” he murmurs.

Steve ‘tsks’ at him for the joke and give him a chiding squeeze. “Yes,” he insists. “Now get going, nutso, before you're late. And don’t forget your coffee.”

Bucky gives him one last peck on the lips and then grabs his things. He puts his coat on and drapes his suit jacket over his arm at the door. “Try to keep her here once she’s back,” he says, frowning once again as he thinks about the “hours” remark Mary had made. “Ridiculous,” he mutters.

“I’ll head over to the gym in a bit. Make sure she isn’t overdoing it,” Steve promises. “Now go on, try to have a good day. Try not to make your secretary cry.”

Bucky huffs, though he is smiling a little as he heads out the door. He’s only ever made his secretary cry once, and Steve will never, ever let him live it down. “Bye Babe. I Love you.”

“Love you too.”

Steve

That evening, they bite the bullet and show Mary the letter that came in the mail: addressed to Bucky, from the circuit court of New York. It lists the court date for review of Mary’s case of custodianship.

Steve’s expecting a meltdown, but what they get instead is a morose sort of silence. He’s not sure he wouldn’t prefer the meltdown. Mary just sniffs and doesn’t talk much, picking her portion of dinner to smithereens before deigning to eat any of it. After their nightly tv time and Bucky's low key domming, she goes off to bed without bidding them goodnight like she usually does.

Steve wakes in the early hours of the morning, having to take a piss. He’s just flushed and is considering being naughty and slipping out to the kitchen to grab himself a slice of cheesecake, when he sees that Mary’s bedroom door is open. He sticks his head in to check on her, but she’s not in her bed. “Mary?” he whispers.

That’s when he hears soft noises coming from the kitchen.

It’s Mary. Steve stalls in place when he sees her, leaning back against the cabinets and face splotchy from crying. She’s dressed in her workout clothes again, hair messy like she’s already been out and back from another workout. Steve frowns worriedly when he spots her house keys and empty water bottle on the counter next to her phone. “Hey Mare,” he says quietly, so that he doesn’t spook her.

She sniffles as she sees him and hurriedly scrubs her face. “Oh. Hi Steve.”

“What are you doing up?” He takes a few cautious steps closer. “It’s late."

“Just wanted to get a snack,” she says, voice sounding tearful and pitiful. It’s such an obvious lie, Steve doesn’t even bother remarking on it.

“Were you at the gym again, Honey?” he asks. He’d had to intervene at the gym yesterday, when she’d been approaching hour number three with no signs of stopping. Now, he walks over and leans against the countertop’s edge right next to her. The room is dark, but he can just make out the silvery tracks left behind on her cheeks, the puffiness around her eyes. He smiles sadly at her. “You want to talk about it?”

Her expression pinches and she looks away. “No.”

“Okay.”

“... I went to the gym,” she eventually murmurs.

“Yeah, I cry at the gym, too. All the time.” Steve nudges his bare foot against her sneakered one. “Come on,” he coaxes. “I’m a good listener.”

“You’re a good tattletale,” she grumbles.

“Hey.”

“Well you are. You tell Bucky everything I say and do. And he’s always on me about everything and I just …” she huffs. “I just don’t want to deal with it sometimes.”

“Well …” Steve hedges, knowing that he shouldn’t say what he’s about to say. “You could still tell me,” he offers. He lets his hand inch over on the counter’s edge and hooks his pinkie over hers. She looks down at it, then up to him. Steve’s mouth quirks. “Bucky can be a lot. I know. But he’s just trying to do what’s right. And you’ve gotta remember that he isn’t perfect. He has to live with this thing just like you do. Some days he handles it better than others.”

“Yeah, sure.”

Steve sighs. “Look, if there’s something you want to talk to me about, but you don’t want him to know, it can stay between us.” Mary looks over in surprise and Steve cringes. “Just ... promise me that you’ll talk it out with Linda, too?”

She hums noncommittally. “Walk me back to bed?”

“Course, Hon.”

She shuts herself into her bathroom and returns after a few minutes, dressed in pajamas and her hair towel dried. She seems surprised that Steve has stuck around when she sees him standing there, toeing the line of the doorway. "Oh."

“I didn’t know if you meant …” he shrugs. “Tuck you in?”

She smiles a little, though it’s sad. Steve thinks she might’ve been crying again in the shower. “Sure,” she says, tucking her head down. She gets into bed and Steve covers her with the blankets, then sits on the edge of the mattress for a moment. “So do you want to talk?” he asks softly.

She chews her lip for a long moment, and just when Steve thinks she’s about to turn him down, she whispers, “... I don’t think it’s working the same anymore.”

“What isn’t working?”

“The stuff with Bucky. The drops.”

Steve’s lips part in understanding. “Oh. I see.”

She nods and won't meet his eyes. “It doesn’t feel the same as it did before. Like it’s not as strong, or something. And it’s wearing off faster.” Her face pinches and for a second she really looks like she might cry.

“Honey?” Steve reaches to tuck her damp hair back from her face, and that seems to be what does it. She starts crying and turns into the pillow, hiding there as her breath hitches in tiny sobs. Surprised, Steve lets his hand fall to her shoulder, where he gives her a comforting squeeze. “Hey,” he soothes. “Shhh, it’s okay. It's okay.”

She shakes her head with a little whimper. “No it’s not. I th-thought they’d stop now. They did stop, for a while.”

“What stopped?” Steve asks, confused.

She sniffles, face crumpled up in distress. “I have bad dreams sometimes. That’s why I was up. Went to the gym to try and run it off.”

“Bad dreams?" Steve says, concerned. "You mean nightmares?" Sometimes Bucky has them too, so he's under no illusions about how debilitating they can be. "Mare?" he prods gently. "What are the nightmares about?”

She burrows further into the pillow, turning onto her side and curling up in a little ball. “Just stuff,” she mumbles. “From when I was a kid.”

Steve gets a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach, and he has to really consider his words carefully before he speaks. He finally settles on a quiet, “Your dad?”

“... Yeah.”

Ouch. Steve swallows. “Honey … you really need to talk to somebody about this.”

She sniffles and shakes her head, and when Steve puts his hand on her shoulder again, she doesn’t try to shrug him off. “You promised not to tell Bucky,” she says.

Steve winces. “Yeah, I know.” Bucky and he already had a pretty good idea about this, but he doesn’t feel the need to point that out right now. “And you promised you’d talk with Linda,” he reminds. “It’s not safe for you to be sneaking out of here at night.”

“I’m sorry,” she whispers. "It’s just that ... the only thing that ever really made ‘em stop was getting drunk. And then with Bucky …” Her body shudders in a quiet sob. “But now it’s not working the same anymore! So what am I supposed to do?”

“Oh, Mare.” Steve rubs her shoulder. “Shh sh sh, Honey, it’s alright. It’s a process. We just gotta figure out what works for you." He gives her a comforting squeeze. “We’ve got an appointment for tomorrow, okay? We’re gonna talk to Linda and figure this all out. It’ll get better, I promise.” He bends to kiss the top of her head, and soothes her with a gentle litany of murmured words as she cries. “It’s okay, Mare. We’ll figure this out. It’s all gonna be okay.”

She calms down after a while of that, and Steve gives her one last hug before he stands to leave. “Goodnight, Sweetheart. Tomorrow’ll be a better day, you’ll see.”

“Steve?” He turns back around to see her peeking at him from over the top edge of the covers. “On the dresser. On the top, there's a ... You can take it.”

He’s confused, until he goes over and sees the only thing that’s sitting on top of the room’s highboy dresser. His heart all but stops. Carefully, he slides it into the palm of his hand, dread filling his chest like cold water. “Mary,” he says, fearful. “Did you—”

“No,” she says. “But I was thinking about it.”

With a sinking sense of horror, he realizes what a massive mistake it was to tell Mary he’d keep secrets for her. “Mary,” he says warningly, “You know I can’t keep this from—”

“I’ll talk to Linda,” she says, looking at him with tearful, angry eyes that dig into Steve’s heart. “I gave it to you, didn’t I?”

Steve’s lips thin and he frowns, pained. “Where did you get it?”

“From work.”

“Why would they have these at your work?”

Mary squirms, looking embarrassed. “It’s for a lamé. For scoring the bread before it goes in the oven.”

Steve sighs and drops his hand, letting his fingers curl loosely over the razorblade. “There’s a limit to this, you know,” he warns. “I want you to feel like you can talk to me without worrying that I’m gonna tell him every little thing, but he’s still my husband. And that means that my responsibility is to him, first.”

Her eyes lower in defeat. “Yeah,” she mumbles. “I know.”

“Hey.” He holds up the blade and gives her a pointed look. “And you can’t be doing this. Because at the end of the day, he’s still the one who’s legally responsible for you. He has to do what he thinks is in your best interest. We both do.”

She frowns and won’t meet his eyes, but after a moment she nods, and Steve believes that she means it when she mumbles a tiny little, “Kay.”

“Kay. You gonna try to get some sleep now?”

She nods, still tearful, but calmer. Steve gently bids her goodnight and heads for the door. When he’s almost got it closed, Mary calls out softly one more time. “Steve?”

“Yeah Honey?”

“Thank you,” she says, so quiet that Steve almost doesn’t hear. “I feel like … I just needed that. To talk to you.”

Steve’s shoulders relax and he smiles grimly, relieved to hear that he’s made her feel a little better, and that he’s able to be someone she can confide in. He even feels a little bit proud that she trusts him enough to tell him these things. It’s almost enough to take away his guilt over promising to keep secrets from his husband.

… Almost.

“G’night, Mary,” he says. “I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Night, Steve.”

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mixisua · 20 days ago

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so uhhhh round seven happened right guys??

for the record the two of us are absolutely still processing what’s going on so this might be completely incoherent 😭

i don’t even know where to start. artistically it was AMAZING. like the animation?? the lighting??? the MUSIC???? blink gone #1 on my Spotify wrapped fr

but now comes the. plot. bc SORRY WHAT. we are flabbergasted ALL OF THAT FOR TILL TO JUST DIE BC OF MIZI??? like Ivan died for what fr, it didn’t even seem to change a thing. I don’t want ivantill canon - I think it’s better if till doesn’t love Ivan, the yearning and reaching for a god is a core theme of alnst and it can be seen in r7 - but I want till to feel EMOTION???

like. i get he saw Ivan in Luka, but then it’s all forgotten when he sees Mizi once again. he’s the same person he was in round 2 ffs, and with everything that’s happened I want change for both of them. like Mizi should be different, till should be different, not even in a ship way just in a TRAUMA way

idk man. maybe I’ll wake up tomorrow and realise this was a stroke of genius but for now I’m just. sad.

#it’s just #I dont want till to realise he secretly loved Ivan from the start #bc I don’t want him to HAVE secretly loved Ivan from the start #but I want Ivan’s death to have meant SOMETHING #and I can’t believe tills ending is in the same place as before #he just. doesn’t change #and don’t even get me started on what this does to my girl Mizi bc she’s SO traumatised it’s just ridiculous #this has been sooo helpful for us to process and get our thoughts out tho 😭#and if you agree or disagree PLS lmk bc I’d love some other opinions #alnst #alnst till #alnst round 7 #alnst ivan #alnst mizi #alnst luka #alien stage #alien stage round 7

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vampiric-succulent · 3 months ago

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OUAW EP 53:

Spoiler warning!!! I’m being so serious right now as this is a pretty lore heavy episode. This contains spoilers.

Also, I am losing my MIND.

When they are in the Beneath and giving their stories to the Oracle: will Torbek ever get that back???????? That’s so important, it’s the entire reason he’s here, I actually don’t think this story will go on if Torbek is unable to remember the inspiration for why he’s on this journey.

Plot-wise I am WORRIED.

Does this mean that the other is just gone??????

This is so consequential like there are so many consequences for these actions YOU GUYS

also Frost’s story was SO SAD to have lost like that was so cool

Other notes: Nikkie is ofc the biggest Coalecroux shipper I love it, also there’s so much good chaos

This episode is a great mix of chaos and LORE

THE WOOD ELF—-

I. Forgot about the Speech Bubble effect that Torbek has. Holy shiiiiiiit. Andy you genius.

Frost being a proud nudist and Gricko’s legs being fused together is hilarious

“I TRIP AND LAND IN FROSTY’S LAP”

THE DUKE????????? DUKE?????????

Good god this is crazy. They all forgot the the goddamn Torbek lore and now they have to catch up but they’re NOT catching up and it’s so ANNOYING

Wait how much do they still know/remember????? UGH THIS IS SO FRUSTRATING

Knowing Rich, Kremy is going to tell a really emotionally important story relating to Gideon and then Kremy’s gonna forget it. Goddamn.

Ouch. Gideon doesn’t remember his dad anymore. Yikes. Can the Feywild stop stealing memories??

A hesitation about taking this memory? What, the other ones weren’t enough to warrant hesitation?

“Get on it, fanfiction” WILD

Something coming to the Inn at the End of the Road? Or just a scene of comfort OH SHIT OH SHIT OH SHIT HOLY FUCK OH MY GOD

TWIG IS BABA YAGA????? AND THE INN AT THE END OF THE ROAD IS BABA YAGA’S HUT???????? AND THE CAULDRON IS RIGHT THERE????????????????

WOAH. WOAH. WOAH. BABA YAGA STILLS THE HAND

Also does the fact that it’s a PUMPKIN tart mean anything????? Is the connection im making to the guy they took this quest from (Madrick Roslov, I think his name was) a valid one to make??????????

Twig is an agent of, or maybe is herself, Baba Yaga. This was foreshadowed? or shown? when they visited Morgana (the version of Zybilna that is stuck in time) and she “fixed” the Twig doll and told the party that it was made by her Grandmother, who was revealed to be Baba Yaga. I didn’t pick up on that.

Nikkie is SO GOOD at storytelling oh my LORD

Damn, Gricko. Damn.

OPERA TIME!!!!!! That’s where Burly is!!

Ohhhh. Opening Night. Mother of Puppets.

ONE MORE TO GO NO GUYS COME ON!!!!! ONE MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!! Level 6 is death, you guys would only be at level 4!!!!

YEAH THERE WE GO MEET CUTE STORY TIME— oh. Oh no he’s. He’s gonna forget it isn’t he. Fuck. RICHIE STOP

“But yknow friends to lovers is also really good” 😏😏

Oh I thought this was gonna be Coalecroux, but wow this works too

REMI GAROU / BARON SAMEDI IS DESCRIBED MIGHTY SIMILAR TO MR GIDEON COAL

TWIN BRAIN COMING IN CLUTCH RN

That was perfect. Thank god that it’s not a Coalecroux thing he’s gonna forget.

They’re all so GOOD at STORYTELLING ffs I’m going to lose my MIND

THE RED AND WHITE WAR AND THE JABBERWOCK 😮🫵‼️‼️ OPE nvm I was wrong

PEGASUS???? THE BARN OWL??????? 13???????

HUH NO COME BACK WHAT DO YOU MEAN

Wait. Okay. So the Barn Owl is of the King of Hearts (if I remember right, that’s what he turned into after the party first met him). The unicorn became Pegasus became the barn owl. The lightning storm, which we now know was an illusion, was involved. Red and White are here again, and we know the Red and White War happened. This is probably larger Dungeons and Dragons lore that I don’t know. I am REELING.

Goddamnit I promised myself I would do things at the end of this episode!!!!! I can’t just go straight to the next one but oh god do I want to

#once upon a witchlight #ouaw #ouaw spoilers #ouaw ep 53 #liveposting #we are so back #legends of avantris #kremy lecroux #gideon coal #morning frost #gricko grimgrin #torbek #coalecroux #episode notes #this one was so good

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preciadosbass · 4 months ago

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28/7/14 [draft from yesterday]

woke up at 11:47 to my parents in my doorway. mum started putting stuff on my bed but i though it was just stuff of mine that id left around the house but it turned out she’d bought me some stuff which is really nice. she got me socks [because i only have one non-fluffy pair], slippers [because our dogs hair is everywhere and my pyjamas end up getting the hair all over the house, even after the place has been hoovered], and purple trainers [because beforehand i only had my converse + knee high converse, and they were both getting muddy and causing me blisters when i go on walks.] i feel extra bad about the argument we had last night now.

i was super tired and my eyes still felt like they were glued shut but i decided not to go back to sleep. i got a little anxious when i saw my ex bestfriend was sad so i sent him a message telling him that i’m here for him and stuff. i still care about him so much, even if we don’t talk anymore. i watched a mikey way complication and listened to a podcast with the way brothers on up until 1:20 when i had a nap [im lazy, i know]

i should mention, i had the weirdest dream. so excuse how bad this explanation is going to be. me and kellin [quinn] were both teens and we were at a restaurant. he had tacky plastic skates on and started doing backflips in them? and running on the spot and joking about being chased? it was such a strange dream to have, especially because i haven’t had one in ages. also, my dad was there for some reason lmaoo

i woke up at around 2 and stayed with boris until 3:20 before i had something to eat and started researching a few crime cases. id been thinking about reading a bit of my sylvia plath book but i got in another argument with my parents [not really with my dad] and practically went into sensory overload so i went in my room and scrolled through ed related things on reddit. although i just wanted to have a conversation with them.

my dad lets things go easier, but mum tends to start saying ‘maybe you’d be happy if i’m not here’ and stuff like that, which i have never and would never imply to her. it just makes me feel like shit, she acts like i’m not allowed to be mad. and i feel absolutely terrible writing this, especially because of the whole gift thing from earlier, and i know shes probably just stressed, and i love her, but nobody acknowledges that i am too. they never do, whatever i do seems to anger my mum. anyway, i spiralled writing this and i don’t wanna turn it into a complete vent post, so let’s carry on.

i carried on scrolling through reddit until like 8 where i went on a walk with all of my family [which we haven’t done in at least a year]. didn’t get off to a good start because the second i walked outside my sister dropped her phone on our rock driveway and smashed her phone to pieces.

she was arguing about paying for the damage up until we got to the park when she went back home with my dad. me and my mum carried on walking while we did would you rather because anything else was starting an argument. we ended up doing so right before we got home but at least i walked for an hour today, i wish it’d been more though. also at one point she asked me if i was questioning my gender like WHAT?? why didn’t i take the opportunity to tell her ffs.. when i got home i obviously said hi to boris and then scrolled on twitter for a bit.

one of my acquaintance’s [i call anyone my age that i know that, because i know people, but they’re not nice to me whatsoever, we don’t hang out, they bully me, i don’t consider them a friend etc] was being their usual self again. i try everything i can to politely escape them/avoid them but i just don’t know how. id feel bad cutting contact with no explanation but if i told them all the disgusting things they do they’d deny it. but i know i have to at some point, they’re such a bad person and i’m tired of putting up with them.

anyway, i feel like i seem like a bitch for not liking them, and the problem in every scenario i’ve written about today so let me know if anyone actually reads this and wants to know what makes her such a bad person. after seeing that i listened to some evanescence and i was just about to put on my fight club dvd i got from a bootsale a while ago when my dad said he was ready for me to ask questions about boris soon so i went up to their room.

we actually didn’t argue tonight because i was able to get on with it quite quickly so i did my teeth and said goodnight to boris around 3. he again started purring before id even started stroking him, he’s so precious. also went over my cals by like 60 today so that sucks

have a good day/night -_<

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steddieas-shegoes · 1 year ago

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Rules: post 10 of your favourite comfort movies then tag 10 people.

I got tagged most recently by @every-aj-needs-an-angel (but I also think I got tagged a while back by a few people and I fell way behind on tags)

1. Pride and Prejudice (2005) - I mean we all know why. If you don’t:

2. Captain America: Civil War - I won’t be able to apologize for this. It’s just the most romantic bullshit a person can see. A man going against his country, the world, his friends, for his long lost love? Sigh.

3. Miracle - It’s hockey. I dunno what else I have to say.

4. The Breakfast Club - If you haven’t watched it, how.

5. Beauty and the Beast - This has been my favorite original Disney princess movie since I was maybe four and I learned to read? I thought Belle was amazing and I genuinely told my mom at six years old that I hoped my husband had a big library. What a dreamer.

6. The Princess Diaries - My sister and I watch this almost once a month. I blame naming Eddie’s daughter after Mia Thermopolis because I had just watched it again.

7. Matilda - This one is depressing when you think about it, but my family used to call me Matilda because I would prefer to just sit in my room and read. And then Harry Styles wrote the song and I was like…hmmm that’s something to unpack…and then I just started watching the movie when I was sad.

8. 10 Things I Hate About You - I mean.

9. Hook - I don’t know how many times I’ve watched this movie, but it’s gotta be in the triple digits.

10. Jumanji (1995) - I don’t have anything against the new one, but the original is just unparalleled. You just can’t compete with Robin Williams.

Now, keep in mind that I RARELY watch anything at all, so when I’m watching these, something is very wrong 😂

No pressure tags: @simplebtromance @zerokrox-blog @izzy2210 @estrellami-1 (I think you may have tagged me in this a while ago too so ignore this if you did 😭) @legitcookie @sidekick-hero @steves-strapcollection @wormdebut (or work on your gd fic ffs) @wynnyfryd @messessentialist

#tag game #personal #not steddie

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mykneeshurt · 2 years ago

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so I don't know if you would feel comfortable doing this but could you do the 141 and Alejandro Rudy

So you and them got invited out to go to the bar with the rest of the boys, but before you'll get there you were having measure insecurity problems. but you go anyway because you want to spend time with the guys. You goes to the restroom/bar to get something drink/etc. and when you come back, you see someone flirting with them. so when you pulled them away from that person who was flirting with them said something nasty about you as you guys walk away from the situation walk and it makes you feel worse so how would they comfort you when you get home

I don't know if that makes sense I'm not good writing out that type of stuff but I hope it's good but yeah I hope it's good

Of course! Some fluff and comfort coming up ❤️✨ gender neutral reader

Warnings - low self-esteem, low self-confidence, self-critical reader - I wrote this last night and I didn’t save it ffs

Walking back out of the toilet you saw a young woman, maybe no more than 25 draped over Ghosts shoulder. Flirting relentlessly with any of the boys she could get the attention of. Feeling annoyed you walked over and pulled her off ‘ever heard of personal space?’ You narrowed your eyes, eyebrows furrowed as you shot her a warning glare.

As she met your gaze she rolled her eyes, ‘and who are you?’ She scoffed, clearly thinking a lot about herself. ‘I’m their friend and you’re making quite the spectacle of yourself. Maybe you should have a water.’ She sneered in your direction, judging everything about you. ‘At least I am a spectacle, not some boring lookin’, ugly cretin’ she laughed. Ouch.

Ghost moved her away ‘I don’t think so love, you don’t speak to them like that.’ She rolled her eyes and walked off, to find someone else to annoy. The familiar sting in your chest began to rise, tears hung just under your irises threatening to fall. That critical voice found its feet again, chipping away at your self-confidence.

Needing some fresh air you left the pub, sitting on a near by bench you picked at your thumbs. The voice shouting at you from inside. You were in your own world until a familiar shadow shat next to you on the bench. ‘You ok?’ Soap asked, his soft gentle eyes studied your face, the smile you’d been wearing all evening now lost. You shrugged not wanting to talk. He draped an arm around you and pulled you close to him, ‘don’t listen to her hen, she’s some drunk tit who wanted to make you feel bad, so she could feel good. Ain’t nothing wrong with you.’ He pressed a tender kiss to your temple whilst he rubbed your shoulder.

Wondering where you were Gaz and Rudy came to check on you. Gaz sat on the side side of you as Rudy knelt by your knees. ‘What happened? Saw you leave’ Gaz asked, his voice laced with concern. ‘That woman who was all over Ghost said some horrible shit’ Soap spat, clearly pissed off at how she had made you feel. ‘Oh babe! Take no notice of her, she doesn’t know you. Not like us, and we think you’re pretty incredible’ Gaz said placing his arm on yours. Rudy placed his hands on your knees trying to offer some comfort. ‘The only person who’s important is you. They’re irrelevant to you, they don’t matter. You do.’

You smiled at him, your sad eyes still fighting to hold in the tears. ‘I’m gonna head back’ you said with a sniffle. ‘We’ll come with you.’

Walking back to base Price noticed the change in your demeanour he hurried up to you. ‘Everything ok kid? You ran outta there earlier.’ You sighed and nodded, ‘naw I know you’re lying kid. You upset about what that woman said?’ Nodding again your averted your gaze from his, not wanting him to see how upset you really were. He placed a reassuring hand on your shoulder ‘oh love, she was talking shit. You’re one of us, family. Nothing anyone says will change that. We love you for who you are.’

You tried to accept what he was saying but you couldn’t. That little voice inside your head still telling you she was right and that you were worthless.

Back at base you went to make a hot drink. Something to distract you from your mind. Hearing a shuffle behind you, you turned and saw Alejandro standing in the doorway. Just seeing him stood there made you burst out crying, the damn of sadness finally breaking. Alejandro pulled you into a tight hug, the feeling of his warm embrace made you cry even more. You felt safe, warm, like you could finally let the catharsis happen. Heavy tears fell onto his jumper as he ran his hand over your head, trying to sooth you. ‘I’m sorry’ you sniffed.

Alejandro pulled away and wiped your tears away with his thumbs. ‘You don’t owe that woman the time of day. She doesn’t know you like we do. That little voice in your head is a lair. You know what we do with liars?’ You shook your head, confused. ‘We kill em!’ You allowed yourself to laugh at this, a real belly laugh. Hearing you chuckle was music to Alejandro’s ears. ‘Thank you’ you smiled, hugging him once more.

As you got back to your room you noticed Ghost stood outside. ‘Hi’ you whispered. Ghost stood there studying your face which was still wet from tears. ‘Mind if I come in?’ Sighing you opened the door and let him in. Walking into the room you sat yourself down on your bed, clutching at your hot drink. ‘Struggling with that voice again?’ Ghost asked as he rested against your desk. ‘Yeah, I just … I don’t know how to deal with it. What that woman said really hurt me.’

Ghost nodded, understanding what you meant. ‘When people pull you down like that it’s cause they’re full of shit and hurting themselves. They bring you down because that’s all they know how to do. They wanna make themselves feel better. You don’t owe them anything.’ You sat taking in what he was saying. You knew he was right, her opinion of you wasn’t important, she didn’t matter. ‘You gonna be ok?’ He asked.

‘Yeah, I think so’ you smiled up at him.

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blackghostm2o · 13 days ago

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On this new episode of Phantom Ramblings (jokes aside I might actually start to call these as such) I’ll yap about Poto 1925.

I really enjoyed it, the music is sooo good (wasn’t expecting it) and the sets are really beautiful. I was afraid of not liking it because it was a silent movie, but I was wrong.

The actors did a great job, Lon Chaney is a fantastic phantom! I loved how he acted with his whole body and hands, really similar vibes to Leroux!Erik, pretty creepy too. How they did his deformity was perfect, really liked it and the unmasking is great, I like how aggressive he is (not like the novel, but close). Now… His backstory: basically inexistent… He HAD ESCAPED AN ASYLUM! I HATE THAT DETAIL! “Oh, you see this mad brute? He was confined in an asylum for the criminals.” Come on… Shitty backstory… They don’t want us to sympathise with him, so they have cut every info about his life. I really like the mask design, btw.

I’m mad that they whitewashed The Persian (here he is Ledoux), come on! Another really annoying thing is how he doesn’t have any backstory with Erik, ffs… He has been investigating him only for a couple of MONTHS, their relationship is completely absent. At least he exists… I guess…

I really like how close this movie is to the novel, the torture chamber, the death of Philippe, the siren (and actually showing her), the SCORPION AND THE GRASSHOPPER. Really great stuff, but they OBVIOUSLY HAD TO RUIN THE ENDING! Now… I know that it was 1925 and Hollywood (not only) hated having characters that aren’t either completely good or completely bad… What makes Erik’s character really compelling is his redemption, how he was not fully evil… How constant shunning and prejudice from society made him a monster… How, as Leroux himself wrote, if he didn’t look like that he would have been one of the fairest souls and how Erik just wanted to be an ordinary person living a normal life, the novel makes us sympathise with him… Here he is just a deformed madman who killed people, so he gets what he “deserves” and gets beaten to death and thrown into the river by a mob… I really hated the mob chasing him… This ending made me sad ngl…

This ending also makes me think about The penalty (1920) (another movie with Lon Chaney as villain) in which he isn’t truly evil, but a FUCKING CONCUSSION made him like that so the doctor’s brain operation made him good again… The same fucking doctor that cut Blizzard’s legs (Lon Chaney) when it wasn’t needed (ruining the life of a 16 y.o. that was then abandoned by his parents and started living in the streets), because GOD FORBID WE SHUN MEDICAL MALPRACTICE and SHOW HOW THE BAD GUY HAS AN ACTUAL REASON FOR BEING BAD.

I saw someone in the comments of the movie saying that they were glad Christine was actually afraid of the phantom and how the relationship isn’t romanticised, but still having a part that loved him, etc… The thing is… There’s no concept of pity nor love here… She is just afraid (which is understandable)… This ending just feels like an oversimplification and “playing it safe” for both of them. In the novel Christine is the one that wants to sing for Erik before disappearing, here she just wants to go away…

Bye :)

I’ll try to draw his lovely mug and his mask :)

#ramblings #rambles #Phantom Ramblings #poto #phantom of the opera #poto 1925 #phantom of the opera 1925 #I finally saw this film

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ayelbee · 2 years ago

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MORE THAN LOVE | K. MBAPPÉ | 4

previous chapter | next chapter

Summary: Sometimes even love is not enough for relationships. But it's fine because you are over it. But getting again in a contact with his younger brother wasn't smart.

TW: some curse words, Kylian being a dick

Notes: I just wanna thank you for you reactions on this ff<3 love you all..

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“So you are really going?” Kylian looked at you in disbelief as you were placing clothes into your luggage. You thought that it was obvious that you would not change your opinion about visiting your family.

“Yes Kylian, as I said earlier it’s the only week when I can see all of them.” you stayed calm. The last thing you would want was to fight with him.

“You know that we could visit them together when Y/b/n will come back from the camp, as I have no games that week.” he came closer to you. You stopped packing, you turned his way as you fixed your gaze on him.

“No, we could not Kylian. How many times do I have to tell you that I'm going to New York that week.” as much as you were trying to be calm, you started to get annoyed by the fact that Kylian was ignoring your work trip.

“But if you told your boss that you can’t go, she would respect that.” he was still calm, which made you just more annoyed.

“But I want to go to Kylian! Why wouldn’t I? What's your problem with that? It is the same as you going to Galtier saying that you don't want to play against Nantes this week.”

“Y/n you know that it is not the same!” He was pissed now. Why were so blind he thought. You weren’t clearly seeing things as he did, and he was also 100% sure that he saw them the right way.

“Do you think it is not? Because it is. Go to Galtier, say it to him and you can leave tomorrow with me!” you throw your hand up in the air. You didn’t understand where this possessive Kylian came from. He was always supportive of you, and your work. So why did he change? What changed him? Where was your Kylian?

“Y/n don’t be fucking delusional. You know that things don’t work this way in football. You know it from the start.”

"Kylian, you're using a double standard on us. So please open your eyes and think about what you want from me and what you are actually giving me. Because where did angry Kylian come from? What happened to you?” you weren’t feeling angry for a moment. You were just sad about what was happening with the two of you.

“Because our work isn't the same Y/n! That’s why I am using double standards for us. You can leave your job because I’m able to give you the whole world with my job. We won’t struggle to live just with my money. But if I stopped playing football would you be able to pay for everything for us? No, you wouldn’t. And if you are trying to find out what happened to me, look at yourself first. Because I’m not the one who all of a sudden put our relationship on the back burner.” Kylian raised his voice, he let his emotions do the talking.

You were silent as you were searching for words but before you were able to answer him he was gone. You didn’t even notice until the slamming of the door confirmed to you that he had left. You sat on the floor next to your luggage slowly breaking into a cry. He had hurt you, hurt you with his words so strongly that you weren’t even sure if you will be able to go back to your guy's normal.

You hugged your knees as close to your body as possible. You were sobbing so loudly, feeling like he just broke a piece of your heart. You started to replay the whole situation in your head, trying to find out where it broke into this argument. Because when he came to you, you thought that in the end, you will explain everything to each other. You thought that Kylian will apologize, that he will understand your actions, and that you erase all the arguments from the last few weeks.

But it didn’t end that way. Everything quickly turned into something more difficult.

It was midnight, and you were trying to fall asleep in your shared bed, but your head was replaying Kylian's words again and again. You knew that with your job you will never have as big a salary as Kylian, but it was still more than you ever thought about. The lifestyle Kylian was living was too expensive, but you didn’t care, because Kylian didn’t care. You were way more cautious with your money than him, but that didn’t change the fact that you were able to secure yourself. You could buy yourself what you wanted unless it was a plane or something like that. The last thing you would want from Kylian was his money, and he knew that.

The opening of the bedroom door interrupted your thoughts. Kylian got home. You didn’t know where he went and to be completely honest, you didn’t even wanna know.

“Are you awake Mon amour?” he lay down on the bed next to you. You hummed in response. “I’m sorry about the argument earlier, but I’m not changing my opinion.” you felt his hands around your waist as he pulled you closer to him.

“I don’t wanna leave angry” you turned to him. “because I love you.” a small tear escaped your eye, and he whipped it off.

“You know I love you too.” he slowly placed his lips on your forehead. You pressed your body more into him hugging him back. And that’s how you fell asleep. Kylian was trying his hardest to not fall asleep. He wanted to remember your hands around him. He knew how much he would need you this week. But you won’t be there. Tears started to escape his eyes as the whole situation from earlier and your hurt eyes were the only thing he could think about.

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The world cup broke Kylian, like he wasn’t broken enough. He was shit since ever then, and he knew it. He also tried to fix himself, but he didn’t know how. And Hakimi wasn’t really helping.

“I’m gonna die alone.” Kylian sat on the kitchen island of Hakimi’s kitchen.

“You are acting like a drama queen Kylian,” Hiba spoke as she was cooking something, Achraf on the other hand laughed. Kylian ended up spending his afternoon there after his brother rejected his plan of spending their time together.

“I’m not, it is just a pure fact. Look at him, he just turned 16 and now he doesn’t have time for his brother. Because of a girl? He always wanted to spend time with me, so that's what actually happened to him.” Kylian wasn’t really proud of himself for crushing at Hakimi's place on their free day. The pair definitely wanted to spend that day as a family with their kids, but Kylian was after all also their family, right? Plus what was he supposed to do? He was desperate.

He had slept over at his parent's house yesterday, so he definitely couldn’t crush at their place. They would start thinking that there is something wrong with him. Which probably was, but he didn’t want them to know. Then he wanted to spend the day with Ethan, but Ethan has been out with this mystery girl, so he was also not an option. Kylian could stay at home, playing Fifa all day long but he didn’t want to. For the past six months, he had spent a lot of time there alone, every day feeling more miserable than the day before so he ultimately rejected that option. So in the end this couple was his salvation.

“You should calm down brother” Achraf sipped his coffee. “You were the same at his age.” Kylian knew that they were right, but he still needed them.

“But I am annoyed because he didn’t tell me about this girl ever before. I had breakfast with him this morning and he didn’t say a word.” Kylian stole a cookie from a plate next to him.

“Because he was nervous.” Achraf rolled his eyes. “Anyway you didn’t tell me that you went for breakfast to your parent's house today.” he raised his eyebrows

“Well, I was sleeping over.” Kylian didn’t really want them to know about this.

“Again?” Hiba once again moved her attention to the men. Kylian just shrugged his shoulders, looking down at his hands as if he was guilty. “Is that because of Y/n again?” Hiba really cared about Kylian as he was her’s husbands best friend. But she also really liked you.

“Yeah,” he admitted, still looking at his hands. “I wasn’t ready for seeing her again, I just couldn’t go home.” now he looked at Hakimi, who got closer to him as he placed his hand on Kylian’s should.

“Maybe you should talk to her Kyky, it is six months and you are still not over her yet.”

“Who would I help? Definitely not to myself. She’s probably over it for a long time, I wouldn’t be surprised if she was actually leaving from a date yesterday” Kylian knew that you were over it, you were the one who broke up with him.

“Kylian, you still stalk her instagram so you know that she wasn’t leaving from a date yesterday.” that was enough for Kylian. He came for reassurance, now he was getting nothing but misery. The misery that he may have deserved, but didn't want to admit it.

“I’m gonna go home, thank you for those kind words people. See you Hakimi tomorrow.”

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The moment Kylian entered his apartment he felt sick. Ever since you left it was empty. Empty with stuff and empty with emotions. The warmth of home left even when heathers were on.

Kylian crashed on the couch, too tired to go to the bedroom. Today he did nothing physically demanding but he was still tired. More mentally than physically but still tired. The apartment didn't look like that day when you left. Kylian wouldn’t be able to live in that. He changed quite a lot of things. He couldn't sleep in the same bed, he couldn’t have the same couch. So he bought these things new, but it didn’t help him sleep better. Kylian even replaced the painting on the walls with some random stuff to make him feel better. But he won’t feel better if he won’t speak to you.

So now he was looking down at his phone trying to decide if he was going to do the right thing or if he’s gonna make things just worse. But in the end, he pressed the green button hoping that he was making the right decision.

His whole body tingled at the thought of hearing your voice again. He patiently waited.

How will you react to his call?

Will he hear your sleepy voice?

Maybe not everything is lost. Maybe that’s what you are waiting for, his actions.

No, he didn’t feel miserable. He felt hopeful.

But he waited in vain, after a few seconds of silence came a wave of hard realization.

You have blocked him.

It suddenly dawned on him how naive he had been for a moment. All the shreds of hope he had gathered during that quick moment were lost again. You were lost, and he knew he would never find you on his own. Now he felt like the night you broke up again. His little house of hope was destroyed in a matter of seconds. The first tear escaped his eye, and then hundreds of others escaped too.

He was fucked and he knew it.

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Tag list: @nightlockcornucopia, @she-lives-in-her-dreams, @sorceresski @m4k444 @mrs-dasilvasantoss

#kylian x reader #kylian imagines #mbappe psg #mbappe imagine #light angst #pov #ethan mbappe #football imagine #kylian mbappe x reader #more then love #kylian mbappe

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