#ferret's freshly microwaved post

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Zodiac signs of The Glory characters, anyone?

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One Bad Day - ferret_not_microwave - Les Misérables - All Media Types [Archive of Our Own]

Hi, here's my first Les Mis fanfic! I wrote it keeping in mind my own experiences with anxiety, and I sort of projected them on Combeferre, I guess? Anyway, I hope y'all like it!

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Okay, I've been mulling over this thought for some time.

Look, I really like it when the Les Mis fandom shows a multiracial Les Amis L'ABC. Many of the Amis are BIPoC in my head. But, sometimes I can make out when fanfiction writers do not have enough knowledge about the race they try to represent, and then I really wish that there was atleast more research going in to actually flesh out these ethnicities, than making them tokenish stuff. This post is just a little encouragement to the fandom at large to just pay a little more attention to the deets? Ask your BIPoC friends more?

I would not presume to know about other races and ethnicities, but I was lowkey amused by depictions of Indians in the Amis. Funnily, it is almost always Combeferre who is Indian, and I can't help but think that it feeds into the stereotype of the mild-mannered, nerdy, overachieving Indian student/doctor etc. I would really love to see Indian Courfeyrac, Enjolras, Jehan, or Cosette for example? I've seen people in my country IRL who are VERY like them in headcanons, but somehow they are never Indianised.

Not only that, it is funny that almost every "Indian" Ferre is vaguely North Indian, surrounded only by kheer, tikka masala, Diwali and Holi, without any exploration of numerous other Indian identities (there are so many cultures and languages, right? I don't speak Hindi, nor do I celebrate Diwali and Holi as an Indian, for example). This isn't to hate on North Indians, it's more to wish for other explorations. Also, just tikka masala and Diwali doesn't complete North Indian culture. Someone like Ferre, who is obviously woke, would never not interrogate the issues in his own culture and bring them to the Amis' attention. But I'm yet to see Indian Ferre talking about caste, colourism and nationalism, while talking about racism, sexism and queerphobia. The only time when that culture is actually questioned is when the fear of queerphobia comes up, but not all Indian families are queerphobic (case in point, my own family) and queerphobia isn't the end-all of all Indian family issues.

It made me a little amused when I did find a Bengali Ferre once, who the writer termed "Bengalese" (not really a term?) and whose family was shown as vegan and making eggplant biryani. Tbh, the to-go meat substitute for Bengali food is jackfruit, and eggplant doesn't really work with Bengali Biryani (it is there in other variants, maybe. Enlighten me?). Also Bengalis are usually not vegan. Veganism in India has a whole gamut of socio-political-regional implications, because of its historical association with the oppressive elites of the caste system and Aryan imperialism, and cannot always be read in the same way as the veganism of the West. But since I do know some Bengali vegans, for their sake I can say that Bengalis have a vibrant vegan food culture which does not necessarily use the same meat substitutes as the West.

But maybe this is overdoing it, so I'm keeping it as a tiny example. I'm sure other South Asian, East Asian, Black and Indigenous readers of the Les Mis fandom would have similar complaints about the characterisation of Joly, Bahorel, Eponine or R.

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Les Amis Modern AU: What They Wish Others Believed About Them (Part 1).

[I'll do this series in 4 or so Parts].

[I kind of wrote this in response to some general trends in characterising the Amis. There are some stereotypes which I'm not quite comfortable with. ]

Enjolras:

• Wants people to know that he isn't always angry and uptight.

• That he can giggle for hours on end and even snort like a malfunctioning car when supplied with enough puns and Penguin videos.

•That people can walk around him without being on eggshells all the time. He doesn't like the idea of Christmas Capitalism, but that DOES NOT mean that people need to stutter "Chris-sorry-non-denominational holiday party" to him all the time.

• That he does hang out with Bahorel, Joly, Bossuet and Chetta as well. And they know he's scared of nightclub crowds, so they also find nice places to go with him. Enjolras has a photo of them in front of an amusement park carousel pinned on his headboard.

• He's also super unhappy that people think of him as a pretentious wokeboi who never accepts a different point of view. He tries too hard to undo whatever prejudices he has, and frequently cries in the shower when he thinks he has been horrible to someone. He apologizes almost instantly if he fucks things up, and tries his level best to fix the situation.

• That he likes other colours too. Enj has a blanket which is a soft shade of mauve, which he simply cannot do without at night. He also loves porcelain blue, rose gold and emerald green. He had a dark academia phase once.

• That he has had high school crushes. A few, intense ones. Except remembering them hurts him still.

• That he does like his caffeine, but he's careful enough to not overdo his coffee intake. In fact, Enj does take remarkably good care of himself and people around them. He's meticulous in following grocery schedules and house-cleaning routines, and actually enjoys them. He's a brilliant plant parent, second to Jehan.

• That people sometimes wait for him to "open up" and ultimately "reveal" his softboi self. He's what he is, not a coconut. -_-

• The Amis do know all this, and live him for what he is. Just, some others don't believe him. :(

Combeferre:

• Wants people to know that he is not always so "put-together". That there are days when he has crippling anxiety and self-doubt and can't get out of bed, let alone shower and make breakfast. There are also days in which he can't stop himself from crying in the Musain's bathroom, for inexplicable reasons.

• He also has extremely short bitten-off nails.

• He's frustrated when people don't believe that he has ever received horrible feedback on his dissertation drafts and has a few fail grades in his school report cards. The last thing he wants is people brushing off his sadness at bad feedback because "ofc you'll bounce back, duh!"

• He's super scared of brain fart moments, or being cornered with things he's not clever at at all. Like card games. He's clever at some things, not so in others, and is NOT a know-it-all.

• His favourite birthday gifts are never books.

• His temper is actually shorter than people think it is. He can snap fairly quickly when someone is actively being an asshole. He resorts to sarcasm usually, because if he gets angry angry, he starts crying.

• He wishes that people don't look at him simply as an over-serious, nerdy, kind-of-dull Deputy Enjolras. He has a completely different style of leadership to Enj, which often helps the Amis a lot, particularly in non-protest events like fundraisers, awareness campaigns and bake sales.

• He is actually pretty good at displays of affection (even the cheesy kind), which he combines with acts of service.

• He knows when people are absent-mindedly nodding away when he launches into his nerd rants about moths, science, art and cinema. He has reduced his rants to a bare minimum, and most people think it is him being quiet.

• There are days when being the mediator/ "mom-friend" burns him out.

• He's extremely picky while shopping. He'll spend HOURS looking for the perfect sweater vest/cardigan/turtleneck and shirt combination. Even though they are almost always shades of blue, black, white and grey, they often come with neon yellow or pink accents. He DOES NOT like argyle, and barely tolerates beige.

• He has ridiculously dramatic classical music choices. Courf once found his "angry playlist" (it had Verdi's Requiem, Beethoven's Fifth, Grieg's Hall of the Mountain King, and Wagner's Ride of the Valkyries). Ferre often plays it while proof-reading his papers, or after a fight with Enjolras.

Courfeyrac

• He gets really miffed when some people infantilize him. He's the eldest sibling in his family, for fuck's sake, he knows how to take charge and be the adult in the house! And no, he doesn't break things at the drop of a hat.

• He has trust issues. He can make small talk sound like really friendly conversations, but it takes him months to trust people enough to tell them about what he really likes, dislikes, wants and opines. The ultimate trust test? When he finally trusts someone enough to cry in front of them.

• He's just as good a "mom-friend" as Ferre. Taking care of R when he's low? He's there. Applying first aid to all of them after protests? He's got it. Making sure to check on Eponine when he babysits Gavroche? Yep. Goes out of his way to look for Cosette to stop Marius's pining? Yes again. He feels a little low when the same people he had "mothered" over treat him like an overenthusiastic kid.

• He likes glitter. He isn't obsessed with it. And certainly doesn't carry bucketfuls of it, because it can get inconvenient af. His pink colour choices are oddly specific (he loves baby pink, and dislikes Barbie pink).

• He needs his alone-time to recharge. A LOT of it. He walks all around the city in those days, headphones on, blocking out the world. He likes calm classical music then, instead of his usual repertoire.

• He was really good at schoolwork. It's just that he didn't want to walk the academic path for his career. He loves to indulge in loooong, nerdy debates about anything and everything with people. And he ABSOLUTELY rips people a new one when they look at his pink denim aesthetic and try to peg him as airheaded and stupid (if the other Amis don't get to the people first).

• Marius does Courf's nails better than he does it himself. Far better. Also makeup.

• Contrary to popular belief, he doesn't randomly talk to everyone he meets. He just happens to participate in a lot of group events.

• Like Enj, Courf is extremely scared of his own prejudices and problematic sides.

• For the longest time, he hid the fact that he loves wearing makeup, dieting, watching Queer Eye and reading cheesy romance paperbacks because he was super scared that people would judge him. The Amis doesn't, so he showers them with trivia on these.

• Courf is actually really punctual, but on reaching the venue he usually finds someone needing his help, so he dumps his bag in the Musain and runs out again. The bag is evidence of his punctuality.

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Drew a picture of little Mirabel, clapping when little Camilo got his gift.

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Les Amis Modern AU: What They Wish Others Believed About Them (Part 2).

[I kind of wrote this in response to some general trends in characterising the Amis. There are some stereotypes which I'm not quite comfortable with. ]

Jehan:

• They get weirded out when people always expect them to present femme, wear flower crowns, flowing ponchos and skirts. They do love these, especially flowers. But they barely get time to slip on a T shirt over a pair of shorts and tie up their hair in a messy knot before going out for last minute groceries. Some days, they actually like wearing plaid shirts, hoodies, berets and jackets. And they did have a "I'M BORED WITH MY LONG HAIR LEMME CHOP IT OFF" phase. Or multiple such phases. They look amazing, both ways.

• They wish people stop perceiving them as tiny and fragile. They are actually pretty regular sized. They are actually taller than R and Joly, as tall as Marius and Courf, and can give a mean right hook to anyone who threatens to assault them and people around them. They get slightly miffed when people don't expect them to pack in a punch to defend themself.

• They really wish that people didn't assume that they have the solution to all their emotional problems. They are a mess too, yannow? With lots of tea, a few potted plants and a decorative skull. And they really wish that they could have a meltdown in front of some people in turn.

• They aren't always all calm and zen. Woe betide anyone who interrupts Jehan in a writing session. Or a proof-reading session. Or catches them hitting their head on the corner of the table while trying to clean the dust under it. And woe especially betide anyone who interrupts these activities of Jehan to pine for the umpteenth time.

• They don't always entertain valentine poetry requests just because they specialise in Romanticism. "Romanticism with a CAPITAL R", they yell, "ALSO includes poems like the Masque of Anarchy, and novels like Frankenstein! I'm NOT reading hours of Schlegel for this!" Some of their slam poems are fierce af , and rip the establishment a new one. Also, they don't write poems on every available surface (because they usually hide the more private and sweet poems).

• They wish that people wouldn't hover around them like helicopter parents when their date is edgy ( *Montparnasse*). They can take care of themselves, and will definitely come to people for help if shit hits the fan (that never really happened though). They want to let people know that toxic people can also materialise without leather jackets and piercings.

• They also want to let people know that their relationship dynamics with 'Parnasse is regular af, and not any chewed-out Sinner and Saint trope.

Feuilly:

• Is impatient. Anyone would be impatient if they are working their arse off in three part-time jobs, an Etsy business, classes and assignments. AND Les Amis work. He's tries not be rude, but is often blunt and brusque and has no time for the wounded sentiments of those he calls out for their privilege. Feuilly is hardly the quiet, angelic figure people initially think he is, and can be quite fiery in meetings. He feels frustrated when people don't quite get it.

• He goes out of his way to help his friends. That doesn't mean that he is a handyman for free. He does not have time to fix every article of machinery or furniture his friends happen to damage, definitely not for free. And his friends know that, and never stress him out. He does give them a lot of discounts, though, and is always there for any emergency.

• He finds a lot of rich-people-food tasteless. Lavender tea blends? Perfumed water. Champagne? Meh. Caviar? Nevermind. Canapes? Why?

• He's always afraid that his friendships will fall apart. He cannot hope to attend all meetings, let alone movie nights. He's terrified of dinners and parties, because he's worried about expenses. He cannot trust simple acts of service from his friends because he hates charity. He's also a little self-conscious about his old thrift-shop clothes. He's always terrified of losing his jobs. It takes a lot of time for the Amis to convince him to trust them, and they try their level best to make sure that they don't hurt him in any way, and help him as much as he permits (sometimes even more).

• He is learning how not to judge people for their apparent privilege without knowing their life-stories, and, whenever not tired, takes an active role in trying to know people's histories.

• Education is rough for him, because most professors insist on standards of work presentation which are usually learned by really privileged people. Even if he is low-key a genius who learns really fast and gives tons of content in his paper, he gets mediocre grades because of vague things like "colloquialism usage", "cluttered style" and "unacademic presentation".

• Sometimes has meltdowns and panic attacks, particularly at the end of the month. Feuilly knows what homelessness is like, and does not want to repeat it again, even though he's financially in a better place than before. He wakes up with nightmares about being passed out at the back of a subway train.

• Feuilly is an old soul. He knows when an Ami is sad, or in trouble. But he'll wait till he knows they are ready to tell him what's wrong. It can sometimes seem bordering on tough love. He hopes that no one thinks him to be insensitive because of that.

Bahorel:

• Likes bar brawls only when it involves kicking someone's ass for being creepy, homophobic, sexist, racist and similarly-ist assholes. He absolutely does not like gratuitous violence for its own sake. And FFS, he doesn't really like Tarantino.

• Wishes people don't look at him weirdly when he is doing regular stuff like groceries, parking his motorbike, playing with Gavroche or Azelma, or going plant-shopping with Jehan. He knows that people stare as though he was a ticking time bomb, waiting to go off in a reassuring display of toxic, hypermasculine machismo. He hates that. -_-

• Similarly, he hates it when people assume that he's all brawn and no brain, particularly after knowing him to be a law school dropout. He has a grim satisfaction in seeing a newcomer to the Musain look at him agape, expecting him to be some kind of tropey backbencher only there for brawling, but finding him actively engaged in articulate brainstorming while the others nod enthusiastically.

• He likes bar crawls. That doesn't mean he encourages R to drink. He's done a LOT of work helping R to work on his drinking problem and was one of the happiest when R got his first bronze sobriety chip.

• In fact, Bahorel is notoriously good at dancing in a bar, and often goes for the dancing only. In bars, he takes care of everyone - including the DD who lingers in the corner with a beer and their phone, uncomfortably anxious, and desperately needing company (looking at you, Ferre).

• Dropping out of law school has made him really uncertain about life. For the first few months after dropping out, he regretted every bit of it, cried himself to sleep after feuding with his anxious family over the phone, and had quite a few suicidal thoughts. It's not that he's completely certain that life is okay now, but he's much happier studying journalism.

• As a kid, he hated his height and build because he was considered too big for a certain really cute boat ride in an amusement park. He also had eating disorders in high school.

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Les Amis Modern AU: What They Wish Others Believed About Them (Part 3).

[I kind of wrote this in response to some general trends in characterising the Amis. There are some stereotypes which I'm not quite comfortable with.

[Also, OMG I didn't think people would like these posts so much. Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thaaaank you to all who gave the cutest hashtags, y'all are so encouraging!]

[Also, I'm sorry I just posted on R and Eponine today. :'(

Just have a lot on my mind. I'll write on JBM tomorrow, promise.]

Grantaire:

• He. Is. Not. Weak. Seriously, he could really do without those people who think he's a broken mess who loses absolutely every bit of self respect when he sees Enjolras. Just because Enj had shut him up with harsh words on like one occasion does not mean that he lets Enj or anyone walk all over him on a regular basis. He is NOT a doormat, not by a long shot.

• He could also REALLY do without those people with massive saviour complexes who swoop in to save him from the big, bad world. He accepts tons of help and love from the Amis, but will not accept any kind of pity service, damnit (and they know it). And it takes a lot of strength to plow through alcohol addiction to sobriety.

• He is pretty much a guardian angel in bars because of his history with addiction. He knows how much drink can a person take, and which drink they should avoid. With Bahorel, he hovers around the rest of them, snatching away glasses when the lightweights get too drunk, and replacing them with glasses of water. That he can box also comes handy. Sometimes. Heh.

• Not every point he says to oppose Enj is a cynical barb. And they don't always have screaming matches in the Musain. There have been many days of trading constructive criticism, because R has a lot of first-hand experience about the city. R usually knows the fine line between Enj getting combative and Enj getting hurt/frustrated, and has learnt not to say something so cynical that he crosses the line.

• Like everyone else, R is also learning. He is working on his prejudices, realises that some his past jokes were insensitive, sometimes even sexist or ableist, and actively corrects himself and others around him.

• Further, their relationship did not start with a dramatic makeout session mid-argument. Because both of them are on the way to being mature adults who know that aggressively displaying sexual tension is not the best way to start a relationship.

• It is not just Enj he's generally cynical to. He's cynical, that's it. And he does enjoy arguments with the others, where there's mutual exchange of knowledge, because he does not ever believe that the rest just parrot what Enj has to say. He has captured everyone's argument face in his sketchbook: Ferre waving his hands about, Courf's eyes widened mid-rant, Feuilly's eyes narrowed with a brief, brusque comment, Jehan's smiling like a cat who got the cream when their argument hits home, Bahorel thumping the desk in jovial agreement, Marius processing what he's hearing. He kinda likes Les Amis L'ABC too, not just the people there.

• While there are rough days when his self esteem runs sub-zero, there are days when he is super happy with himself. These are not exactly blink-and -miss either. The Amis cherishes his beaming smile when he defeats Ferre on Trivia Night, sings beautifully on Karaoke Night, paints an AMAZING picture of all the Amis in a protest and shows it off to all of them, cooks a meal which JBM raves about, and, on one memorable occasion, makes a V important point in a meeting that leaves Enj starry-eyed. There are things he hides from them because he's too shy and doubtful, but they are decreasing.

• There are days when he goes into a house-cleaning spree. Like the scrubbing tables-dusting-throwing out piles of trash-cleaning corners with q tips-kind of spree. Which leaves him so exhausted that he can't get out of bed the day after. So yeah, his place isn't always shabby.

Eponine:

• She is tough. She is blunt, and to the point. But she is not rude without reason, just to be edgy or something. And definitely doesn't throw around idle threats. Most of the Amis find her very pleasant, actually. She gives a small smile to everyone, cracks dry jokes, lobs scrunched-up balls of paper from across the room and fights with Courf for the caramel popcorn bucket. She doesn't yell to make a point, but speaks it aloud with a lazy drawl while fiddling with a rubber band ("Bull", she says, eloquently enough). To new people, she is just that shy and suspicious, so she doesn't really talk.

• The thing she wants the most is to feel safe. Hence she is often quiet, suspicious and moody. She feels really upset if people think she's horrible (or a "bitch", like she sometimes hears random people say about her) just because she cannot trust people enough to be all smiles and rainbows, even though she wants to be. She also feels really vulnerable, and is always scared that people wil leave her or hurt her once they know that she panics and cries a lot. She feels safe with the Amis, and many a times you'll find her as a sniffling burrito on someone's couch. THIS DOESN'T MEAN SHE'S WEAK, THIS MEANS SHE HAS A LOT OF SHIT GOING AND NEEDS RELEASE. -_-

• Her preference for dark clothes started because dark clothes seemed easier to maintain. She needed lesser amounts of detergent, and could stretch it out for longer before the inevitable laundry walk. She had actually asked Jehan for goth fashion tips to liven things up, and they had provided her optimal options (like dark lipstick). Still, she doesn't wear fishnets everyday, and just saves them for "special occasions".

• She is one of R's best friends. But no, she is not his personal babysitter. She doesn't go chasing everyone who she thinks has hurt him immediately, neither does she always haul him around when he's down in the dumps. She usually gives him sound advice, checks on him whenever she gets breaks between shifts, and if she cannot help, sends an Ami or two along.

• Her go-to way of showing disappointment in anyone is to send them a voice message stating exactly how they have fucked up (in an ice cold voice) and giving them the silent treatment until they fix things or apologize. Only once did she go nuclear on someone, no one wants to talk about it.

• Ep is a big sap. She does not really conceal her love of heart-shaped Valentine cards, pink roses and candles. Don't forget that she grew up in fair comfort tilll her preteen years, and she had exposure to much sappy media. While the Amis were surprised initially, she makes them take it in stride. She gets a strawberry cake every birthday, complete with pink balloons et al. (organised by Courf). She dreams of going to Disneyland.

• In the face of danger (men following her on the streets or something), her first response is flight, not fight. She knows that fighting can often make things worse, and cannot afford frequent trips to the ER. She can fight, though. She just doesn't want to until absolutely necessary, for self-preservation. She's brilliant at amateur first aid.

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Feuilly falls asleep in meetings. The Amis know not to wake them up, because they know how grueling their workdays are.

[Picture description: A person with shoulder length red hair and light skin is asleep at a desk. Their head is resting on their arms, which are resting on scribbled paper, and they are drooling slightly. They are wearing a dark blue jacket and a white t shirt, and their right elbow is resting on a white baseball cap. They are watching a black strapped watch.]

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Les Amis Modern AU: What They Wish Others Believed About Them (Part 5)

[I kind of wrote this in response to some general trends in characterising the Amis. There are some stereotypes which I'm not quite comfortable with.]

[Hey, y'all! I'm so sorry for not posting this series for a long time, I was flattened for the past 12 days by COVID-19. We have Cosette and Marius today, and I'm so glad that I am feeling better enough to write about them. Cheerio!]

Cosette:

• Is fed up of being considered dainty, fragile, weak and excessively nice, a bit of a pushover. She is anything but. Living with crappy foster parents don't really let you do that. She can stand up against bullshit with biting sarcasm if necessary. It's just that Cosette doesn't rise to the bait very easily, because she has trained herself to ignore battles which don't need her attention. But that doesn't mean that she needs to be protected all the time.

• Is sick of having to relate her childhood traumas in order to not be judged as being a privileged airhead. Cosette likes buying nice things. She likes fashion, and she has some habits from Catholic school, still. She spends a lot of money on her friends and loved ones. She is sunshiney and injects bougie humour and fun into meetings. That doesn't mean that she knows nothing about the shitty world, and that she doesn't actively try to make ethical choices in her consumer behaviour and social commitments. She really dislikes the "Ohhhhh" moment coming from someone judging her for her privilege when someone tells her story to them. Why presume that people are shitty for no reason, damnit?

• Is sick of being mistaken as straight. On one memorable Pride, she was called "straight passing". She dislikes the term immensely. She thinks that people do not have the liberty to immediately assume that she is heterosexual because Marius is her partner. Similarly, people do not get to assume her sexuality because she presents stereotypically femme.

• She feels insecure and uncomfortable when people fix too much attention on her in relation to someone else, as if to scrutinize her. It happened twice amongst the Amis, once when Marius introduced her as his crush for the first time, and once when they came to know that she and Eponine knew each other since childhood, and that Eponine's parents were her abusive foster parents. She likes it better if she were befriended for being herself.

• She feels a little frustrated that people didn't get her conflicting feelings towards Eponine. People immediately assumed that she forgave and forgot everything Eponine had done or said when they were children, in her "characteristically sweet way". Actually, the first time she saw Eponine, her fear reared its ugly head again and she almost ran out of the Musain. There was much dancing around Eponine (who seemed worn out and super uncomfortable as well) and it is only with Marius and Courfeyrac's help that Cosette could start a conversion with Eponine. She did it not be particularly forgiving (though she eventually forgave her anyway), but because she needed to leave her emotional baggage behind and move on.

• A large part of Cosette's forgiveness towards Eponine was fuelled by the knowledge of Eponine's own abuse at her parents' hands. As someone who had faced quite a bit of the same abuse, she needed to put her foot down. Cosette was extremely angry about it, and her anger made sure that Eponine could separate from her parents faster, and eventually get custody of her siblings.

• She hates, hates, hates it when people remind her that she's lucky to get an adoptive father like Valjean particularly after she has a row with him. Just because her foster parents were shitty doesn't mean that she cannot speak against some of Valjeans imperfections! And children often disagree with their parents. She doesn't need to be dampened with the idea that she should basically think Valjean to be perfect because of her past. She is fiercely loyal to Valjean, and doesn't need anyone to test that.

• Cosette is protective of Marius. No one gets to mow Marius over with judgements and snide comments. In fact, Marius found himself being not so much the butt of jokes anymore after Cosette teaches him to stand up for himself. At the same time, Cosette does not helicopter parent Marius. She does tease him within limits, and does not usually interfere when he has disagreements with the Amis. It is a fine balance which does exhaust her sometimes.

• Cosette can be mischievous, even impish. She can land punches (whether they hurt or not doesn't matter), ace paintball/mudslinging matches, play the best pranks on April Fool's Day and curse like a sailor if needed. She is especially proud of the wide-eyed look she still gets from some of the Amis at her antics. She can also get people out of trouble faster than you can say "bail".

Marius:

• Marius feels scared of being judged. It is really, really difficult to understand your own privilege when you come from a super rich, super bigoted family (read grandfather). He has taken lots of embarrassing knocks and call-outs every day till now, but he is learning, and learning fast. The Amis know, and for them he isn't some peripheral person anymore, but an integral part. But sometimes he wakes up with nightmares of being kicked out as a wokeboi and a fraud by the whole group. He often stumbles over his words because he panics that maybe what he is trying to say is problematic. It takes him months to take any initiative in the Amis because he suffers from imposter syndrome all the time.

• Marius hid all information about his favourites (he loves strawberry rosé macarons and silver needle tea, for instance) because he thought that he would be judged as a rich brat. Funnily, it was Ferre who had figured these out and was the first Amis to give him a small tea chest and a box of macarons as a birthday gift (followed closely by Courf and Jehan with a huge birthday party). It took time for Marius to understand that just because he got a bit panned for his political opinions the first time, it doesn't mean that the Amis hate him.

• Quite unlike popular belief, Marius and Ferre do get along very well. They share a lot of niche interests (poring over etymology dictionaries and having a love of museums and trivia nights). They did discuss that first "to be free" moment, and Marius had placed his request to be given more chances to undo his problematic stances. (There was also another "to be free" moment that had left Ferre stunned, but it's a them thing). It hurts Marius when people immediately think that he's probably annoying Ferre when they hang out.

• Marius is not stupid. Please. The whole idea people have that he is stupid because of his awkwardness and shyness is plain mean at times. No, he doesn't need to be talked to slowly, like talking to a child. Whenever he has the courage, he brings up a lot of valid points in Musain meetings. He is extremely resourceful in handling money and talks with boring rich people, and fundraisers have never been better without him. He is juggling a double Masters degree with internships and volunteer services, and picks up languages at the drop of a hat (including Elvish).

• Marius has also had that dangerous phase when, in a bid to be as radical as possible, he fell into trouble way too many times. Even the most even-tempered of them all (read Jehan) has outright cried in exasperation on finding Marius glaring at a policeman in a protest, promising to burn the place down with a flare if they didn't back off from hitting protestors. Marius has similarly taken punches and hits, and there was a time when Joly would hover around him to administer first aid as quickly as possible. It took Enj and R a whole day to explain to him the merits of self-preservation and that revolution today does not necessarily involve a militant loss of life.

• Marius has also that phase when he drove a college sophomore to tears with his radical speech. Aka attacking the heck out of the kid's problematic Facebook post. Cosette had to give him a talk. Marius is learning about how to be a zealous but kind activist every day.

[ferret-not-microwave]

Hey peeps,

Is it okay to feel a little down if you haven't received enough kudos on a new fanfic on Ao3? I'm a newbie in fanfic writing and I'm not sure of I am doing something wrong. I don't want to make fanfiction writing some kind of a self-imposed contest for getting kudos, but lately I just feel I'm not being a good enough writer. How to help myself over writer's blues? :'(

[ferret-not-microwave]

Felt like drawing Courferre where they are both women. Also, short Combeferre and tall Courfeyrac for a change.

[Picture description: A short, brown woman with dark curly hair, glasses, and a yellow plaid shirt is embracing a taller, pale woman with two ponytails, a glittery mesh crop top over a tank top and a frilly skirt. Both women are looking at each other and smiling.]

[ferret-not-microwave]

Hey y'all.

Long time no see.

Anyway, I am just hooked with Encanto and I thought of drawing Mirabel as an abuela (or a tia abuela) herself, some fifty years later (maybe. Idk). Ended up drawing someone who looks like aged-up @prestopenguin , but okay.

Also, drawing after a long time.

Is a grandaunt a "tia abuela"? I relied on Google Translate, but help me out?