#femme obi wan

[raphaerolo]

Last line challenge

I got tagged by @bluemaskedkarma and reverse uno'd by @merlyn-bane (btw reverse uno tag back to you) and i havent been actually writing or drawing all that much lately because i've had really weird work hours but huzzah today's my day off and i get to draw

This one comes from my cwfkb

My last line was the orange specks to indicate crocs for future me's reference. Because the crocs are important to remember.

I truly dont know who's been tagged in this frenzied round of a last line challenge - but uhh tagging @cozy-fish-crow @pisscord @lightasthesun @meebles @aerrowx and anyone else who wants to play

[shapelytimber]

Today is my birthday, so I get to post low effort shit for my favorite au <3 enjoyyyy

[COMMISSION] - [LINK TO THE AU RECAP]

Funny when you actually write down the canonical ages of characters in a canon heterosexual romance, sometimes you get reminded of how male female age gaps in fiction (and sometimes irl) can be normalised because sexism- and I was generous enough to take Leia and Han's ages from sw6........ And not the 22 / 37 it is in sw5-

Always give me a bit of the creeps when I remember that about this ship fkfkfk if they had met when they where older I wouldn't really care.... But man Leia was 19 in sw4-

Thankfully it's fiction, and I can go back to forgetting Han solo has only a 4 year age gap with his step father... and at least they didn't met when Han was a full on adult and she was a child, and he didn't raise her looking at you very popular sw ship- ok I'll stop fkfkkf

[dontbelasagnax]

The Glass Slipper is a Strap-On

Pairing: CC-2224 | Cody/Obi-Wan Kenobi

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 6,401

Tags: Rule 63, Butch/Femme, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Fairy Tale Retellings, Cinderella, One Night Stands, Making Out, Heavy Petting, Strap-Ons, Nextdoor Dot Com, Hilarity Ensues, Nextdoor Accurate Homophobia, Getting Together

Summary:

What is a lady to do when the one night stand they're half in love with has to hurriedly make an exit and accidentally leaves behind their strap-on?

Well, in Obi-Wan's case she discovers that modern issues require modern solutions.

[ OR: A modern Cinderella retelling featuring gender-swapped Obi-Wan and Cody as vehicles of sapphic hilarity. ]

Happy Codywan Comfortathon! I'm very happy to share this fic and art with you all. Thank you Anna for hosting this lovely event 💋💗

Click Here To Read On Ao3

@codywancomfort

[padawansuggest]

Cody: *drunk af* Heeeeeeey, babygirl, what’s UP-

Obi-Wan: *on his period, just woke up, too tired to think* Do I look like a girl? Seriously, do I?

Cody: *knows that Stewjoni have a fluid gender spectrum and sometimes his general feels more femme; is drunk and no idea what gender really is tbh* Um… ya?

Obi-Wan: *sits up and starts crying a little* Oh my god that explains so much. Some natborn came up and smacked my ass hard as hell the other day. Felt like he punched my ass, more like, called me Mami!

Cody: Oh my god 👁️👄👁️

Obi-Wan: Does my BEARD look feminine to them???

Cody: *pretty much only has trans sisters* um; I got a few sisters with a beard, idk.

Obi-Wan: *lays back down and screams* I’m going back to bed :(

[xzaddyzanakinx]

Missed Me?

Final part for real this time, no cliffhanger I swear!!

Stepdad!Anakin Skywalker x femme reader

Warnings: none, fluff and sweetness

Info: obi-wan loves his brother; even if he does occasionally want Anakin to double over from a swift punch to the gut. Satine is a lawyer btw

“Sweetheart.” Anakin speaks low and steady over the phone. “I need you to listen to me.”

“What? What’s wrong Ani?” Your response laced with worry.

“Deadbolt the doors, make sure the garage is padlocked okay?” He said sternly, so you immediately did as you were told, switching the call to speakerphone.

“Anakin what is going on?” You demanded.

“Sweet girl, your mom knows okay? She took the Camaro and left me here with divorce papers.” He said calmly.

“You’re fucking joking.” You gasped. “She stole your car? Well I’ll come get you!” You started to rush to the door when he sternly told you no.

“I called my brother, he’s coming to get me. Satine is doing us a big favor and drafting up some paperwork. The house, my car and your car are under my name anyway. Your mom can’t win any of that in court okay?” He reassured you.

“So then-“

“Baby, I told you I need you to listen alright?” He reminded you. “I’m not pressing charges over the car. She’s headed home to get hers I believe, or at least that’s the way she was headed last time I looked at Life360.”

“Keep the doors dead bolted understand?” His tone was oddly calm, as if your whole world hadn’t just crumbled.

“R-right okay.” You whispered.

“Hey- princess, don’t worry. Everything’s fine okay? We are fine.” His voice now gentler than before. “I promise, this divorce won’t be messy. It’s very clear cut okay?”

“But what about you An-“

“No. Nothing is happening to me.” He said. “Nothing. You’re over 18. Everything is fine, I swear it.”

“Okay.” You sighed. “Satine said so?”

“Yes baby. I already told them-“

“Shhh! Shh, mom just pulled in.” You whispered as if she could hear you from the driveway.

“Don’t you dare hang up.” He said sternly.

“I’m not!” You huffed, going to the window to peek from behind the curtain.

You watched as your mother chucked Anakin’s keys at the front door, flinching when you heard the impact. Your mom walked over to her own vehicle and opened the trunk, lifting a backpack out. The yellow glow of the porch light was just bright enough that you could make out the heap of bags in her trunk. She’d already packed her things.

“Oh shit.” You whispered and backed away from the window as she walked toward the front door.

“What?” Anakin demanded.

“She’s got a bunch of bags in the trunk of her car but she’s coming up the porch steps right now.” You squeaked.

The door handle rattled and you heard keys jangling, the twist of the lock, and the forceful push of the front door. Then came the rapid, loud knocking.

“Hey!” She yelled. “I know you’re home. I want to talk to you!”

“No. Don’t say anything.” Anakin warned. “Obi just pulled in, don’t talk to her. Not even through the door.”

Anakin could be heard shuffling and slamming his brothers car door, instructing him to get him home as quickly as possible.

Your mother kept knocking, even going so far as to rap on the window in hopes that you’d hear her out.

“Please just talk to me. I’m not- listen it’s not your fault!” She yelled. “You were just a teenager!”

“Baby- no.” Anakin sounded pained as he spoke.

“I know Ani.” You whispered back. “I know, okay? I’m not gonna talk to her. Not even if she says stupid shit like that. As much as it angers me, I know I’m better off staying quiet.”

“Good girl.” He sighed. “I’ll be home soon okay? Or actually-“

”Obi can we stop at the hardware store?”

“Which one?”

“I don’t care. Whichever is open!”

“Christ, alright.”

“I’m getting new locks before I come home.” Anakin declared.

“That’s probably a good idea.” You said quietly, alittle suspicious of the sudden silence from outside.

You crept back up to the window and saw your mother standing next to her car, sitting on the lip of the open trunk. Her hand flailing as she spoke animatedly over the phone. You could physically see her huff out loud just before she got up and slammed the trunk shut, angrily ending the phone call.

“Has everyone lost their fucking mind?” She yelled, pulling out her car keys and walking to the drivers side door to get in and speed away from the house.

“She left.” You breathed out.

“Good.” Anakin sounded relieved. “I’ll be home as soon as I can okay?”

”why don’t I just take you there? I’ll go get the new locks.”

“Are you sure? Well- if… okay! Okay fine, here at least let me give you some cash.”

“Can you hang up so I can yell at you now?”

“You already yelled at me!”

“I’m not done yet!”

“Well you’ll have to wait. Your wife is calling me.”

“Princess-“ he started.

“I know, I heard.” You let out a slight laugh.

“I love you, see you soon.”

“I love you.” You said, hanging up and immediately collapsing on the couch.

You had let all your emotions out or at least you thought you did, by the time Anakin arrived. You ran to the door with dry eyes but the moment you unlocked it and saw him you were drowning in salty tears. He scooped you up and kicked the door shut, sliding the deadbolt into the locked position before carrying you to the couch.

“Shh it’s okay.” He whispered, his lips kissing the top of your head while you clutched onto his shirt.

“What are we gonna do?” You sniffled.

“What we always planned on doing.” He said.

“Serious?” You asked, leaning back to see that he was letting a few tears fall too despite his calm speaking voice.

“Of course I’m serious.” He said, his eyebrows furrowed. “I love you. I’ve always been serious about that.”

“But we just-“

“Look at me.” He said sternly, wiping his cheek with his shoulder. “I love you. I have always loved you. I don’t care if we just got back together, that doesn’t matter to me. I’m just as serious about you as I was before, it didn’t just go away in our time apart.”

His hands came up to cup your cheeks, his thumbs brushing away your tears. He took a grounding breath and kissed your forehead, the outer corner of each eye, and the tip of your nose.

“I would have left at anytime, you know that? Anytime. I just wanted you to be ready.” He said, a hint of something mournful in his eyes. “Are you ready?”

“Yes.”

Six years later

A new state, a new town, a new house.

A new life.

The moment the divorce was finalized you sold your old home. Using that money to get the hell out of dodge and move to somewhere warm.

Arizona was warm, always warm. You’d never even visited before you chose to live there, neither had Anakin. You wanted somewhere completely fresh, a clean slate for you to write your own story on and gods did you have a good story.

You found a beautiful two bedroom home, absolutely perfect in every way. It was close enough to town but far enough away that you weren’t surrounded by traffic or neighbors. A nice front yard, an ever nicer fenced in back yard. The big floor to ceiling glass windows in the dining room really sold it for you, the natural lighting and the fucking view was outrageous.

There was even a fire pit in the backyard which you decided to christen on your first night there via much too many s’mores. Now it was in regular use, sometimes by just you and Anakin, he did love an evening under the stars. The sky was so clear, unlike any place you’d ever been before, it was almost surreal.

Though as of late it’s been seeing an influx of visitors.

Anakin had his very own garage now, a *six* bay garage at that. He was the local go-to for multiple reasons, the prices, the high quality work, and people love a family owned store. With him as the lead man and you at the front desk, the pair of you were practically unstoppable.

This also meant that Anakin was in control of his work life in a new way. He was able to separate home and work unlike before where it wasn’t ever guaranteed that you’d be left unbothered. No more waking up at the asscrack of dawn to the obnoxious noises of old, no more at-home phone calls, no more blocked driveway, no more late nights.

It meant that he was able to be present for important moments without the worry of distraction. It meant he could cry along with you today.

You both were able to reel it in and contain the tears until the last second. The twins were so unbelievably excited for their first day of school, you both agreed that sobbing the entire way to their classroom would definitely put a damper on their day. So you smiled and skipped down the hall as requested by Leia and Anakin performed Luke’s very long, very intricate, never the same secret handshake at the door.

You gave hugs and kisses and a final goodbye wave, then booked it back out to the car. You almost made it to the foyer before your sniffles turned into cries, when you looked at Anakin for comfort you saw he was already holding his breath in that ridiculously uncomfortable way that he did to stop himself from sobbing.

Thankfully you made it to your vehicle before he passed out from lack of oxygen. It would be a real shame for him to miss this afternoon’s celebratory cookout you were hosting due to a blacktop issued concussion. The other fathers from your first time parents group would be highly disappointed if you ended up in charge of the grill.

“I can’t believe we have 12 more years of this.” Anakin sniffled.

“Seriously? Did you seriously just say that to me right now?” You cried.

“Yeah I did. I just wanted to prepare you for our suffering for the next decade.” He gave you a crooked, tearful grin.

“You’re lucky that I love you.” You hiccuped out a laugh.

“Yes I am.”

Tag-List:

@wickedtactics @tsugumiholic @kingdomhate

@burnthecheshirewitch@cherrylooney@star611

@tahliac11 @exquisit3corpse @jeldog @arzua10

@bby-imasociopath @depressed-kay

@aliciaasky @naty-1001 @mrsmikaelsxn

@illiethefairy @bunnylovesani @offthethir/wall

@slutforhayden @ausskywalker @angelsadmired

@slut4starwarssmut @chocolatepalacecloudhoagie

@starkiller419 @hearts4mitski4 @no1klet @lethargic

@allhailbuckybarnes @shadowhuntyi

@bobtheturmpetman29 @mortalheartache

@fallinlovewithevil @sythethecarrot

@joshfutturmansrighthand @chaoticantihero

@vadersslut @luvvfromme @anakinsbaee

@sweetcheesecakesblog@rga11 @luvskywxlker

@angelsadmired @kaminokatie @anakin-pilled

@graveyard-stray @angeldarkness95 @guiltycherries @piastricentric @sweetcheesecakesblog @chiaraanatra @espinathena-17

Let me know if you wanna be added/removed

[tideswept]

do we think femme!anakin is short or tall? im leaning towards short b/c i think it would be really funny if the chosen one is this 5'3 ball of rage (also, bonus height difference with obi-wan/padme. the rpf shippers have a field day when the trio is at some political event, padme & anakin are talking, and obi-wan decides to all but pick up anakin and carry her away.)

Aww. ♥ hm. I guess I hadn't put that much thought into it! In the one fic I'm writing she's still got Anakin's canonical height because I just found that more fitting in that setting (also badass? yes? <: ) but as someone who is 5'2"... I FULLY UNDERSTAND THE TINY BALL OF RAGE THING. I embrace it.

lmao now I'm just imagining how often Obi-Wan had to do that to Padakin. Just give up on trying to reason with them and pick them up like a hissy cat and carry them off. angriest little padawan you ever saw. probably capable of blowing up a building with his mind, but no, he wants to throw down with his hands.

[lynchianightmare]

Thanks @greatsaladavenue for tagging me!!!💕

Favorite movie: i can't choose one. I really love Alfred Hitchcock's movies, Star wars, (The empire Strikes back specifically, I CANT STOP WATCHING IT Possession, Z, LOTR, Repulsion, Blue velvet and most David Lynch movies, its a Wonderful life, Memento, nightmare before christmas, and so so much more.

Favorite tv show: The x files always first, breaking bad, better call saul, Succession, The Haunting of Hill house, Obi-Wan Kenobi (im probably forgetting something)

Favorite musical artists: The Beatles, Pink Floyd, Frank Zappa, Bowie, The doors, Gentle Giant, Ella Fitzgerald, Hendrix, Seru Giran, King Crimson, John williams, Yes, The who, Zeppelin, and more.

Favorite colour: blue and pink.

Favorite season: Winter.

Favourite books: 1984, The metamorphosis, Alice In wonderland, Fahrenheit 451, The trial, The shining, Misery, Animal Farm, Blade runner, The girl with the Dragon tattoo, LOTR (but I have only read the first two）

Favorite colour: blue and pink.

Favorite season: Winter.

Favourite books: 1984, The metamorphosis, Alice In wonderland, Fahrenheit 451, The trial, The shining, Misery, Animal Farm, Blade runner, The girl with the Dragon tattoo, LOTR (but I have only read the first two f)

Do you have any funko pops: I have over 20 something. Fav ones: john lennon, my mini han solo one🙏, Mayor (from nightmare before christmas) the mad hatter, Elliot with Et, and Dana Scully.

Do you have a pet: yes, one dog. Ringo (we gave him a second and third name but we only call him ringo😰

Do you write or read fanfiction: does it count if once l made a pink floyd parody fanfic? 👀 with a WHOOPING one comment😜☝️

Song on repeat: probably femme fatale by the velvet underground and Lovely rita.

Tagging? Idk anyone who wants to ❤️

[bad-batch-pretty-boy]

Pretty - Satine Kryze x fem!Reader

A/N: The universe knew I’d be too powerful if this were me, so I had to write it instead, lol

It’s my second fic in the fandom and my first one for Satine so please be nice. I’m still working on proper characterization. Please do let me know if I missed a warning, though!

I’m also maybe channeling a crush of mine, which is why there’s so much angst 🫢 Definitely not projecting or anything. Nope. Not at all

Dividers by @thecutestgrotto

CW: probably ooc Satine; arranged marriage au; mild but important Satine x Obi-Wan; angst; Reader is younger, but meant to be read as about 20; pining; femme Reader; nsfw; smut; explicit sexual content; mild shame; mentioned sex dreams; Reader is a lesbian who doesn’t like men; light teasing; kissing; making out; breast worship; breast play; I think this counts as subspace; praise; fingering; duchess kink; cum tasting; implied multiple rounds

1874 words

Your soft footsteps hurry past the open balcony door. They pause, and slowly return.

You peek around the edge of the door, quietly watching. She’s out there, dressed in a luxurious silk nightgown, so thin you can practically see the dips of her body through the fabric.

She’s talking, voice low and achingly soft. Your heart wilts at the sound. You want it to be you she’s talking to. But you know who it is.

For weeks now, ever since the alliance of your planet to Mandalore, and your subsequent wedding, she’s been talking to someone. A man. A Jedi.

His name is Obi-Wan and Satine is so in love with him and not with you.

You weren’t exactly expecting her to instantly fall for you, given that it was a political marriage. But you’d at least hoped…

You pull back, fiddling with the hem of your nightdress. It’s the companion piece to hers. Short and wispy and so delicate you were afraid it would fall to pieces. You’ve never felt prettier in your life, but you know it doesn’t really matter.

Not now that you’ve gone and fallen in love with your wife.

It’s made worse by the fact that you’re still young. Perfect childbearing age. Still anxious with desire and bottled up hormones.

She’s elegant and older and has a son. A son. He’s barely a few years younger than you. It’s no wonder she hasn’t fallen for you like you have for her.

But oh, how could you not?

You take another peek, gaze slowly tracing the way the gown smooths against Satine’s skin. For a second you allow yourself to imagine what it would be like to trace along her skin with your tongue. To follow the dips and lines of her body to the place you ache to see the most.

Her dress shifts. She turns and you don’t duck out of the way fast enough. But you still move, and for a moment you just hold your breath.

Even footsteps. And a perfectly measured voice. “Why aren’t you asleep?”

You curse the stars, but can’t help but answer the call of her voice. You step back into her sight, head ducked like you’re a shamed creature. “The bed was cold.”

It’s not a lie. It’s never quite warm enough without her. But that wasn’t why you’d been woken up. You can still feel the heat of your dream, the way you’d gasped awake moments before satisfaction.

She hums in consideration, studying your face. She reaches out, lifting your chin. You slowly meet her gaze, your breath catching at the sigh. Stars, she is gorgeous.

“Obi-Wan wants to meet you.” The sudden change has you thrown off. For a moment, you just stare at her. “He… what?”

“He wants to meet you.” A tiny smile dances across her lips and you immediately crave the sight.

“Why…?” You ask, half distracted.

“You are my wife now,” she replies smoothly. “And he is one of my oldest friends.”

You almost snort. He most certainly is not just a friend to her. But you hold back. Instead, you nod politely and look away. “I see.”

She looks at you for a long moment. “I think you’ll like him,” she says softly. “He’s very charming and is more wit than I know what to do with.”

You hate to admit that you also think you’ll like him. Or at least, begrudgingly respect him. But you don’t say that.

Instead, you murmur, “With all due respect, I’ve long known I don’t like any man. He’s simply not my type.”

It’s a very poor joke, and you regret it as soon as you say it.

Satine’s eyebrow quirks. “Your type?” She tilts her head a little. “And what, exactly, is your… type?”

You swallow. Your throat is suddenly very dry and your feet have never looked more interesting. “Oh. You know. Women.”

“Women.” There’s a note of amusement to her voice. “Hmm. What type of women?”

You stop breathing. You can’t look up. She knows. You know she knows. And she’s teasing you.

It’s so cruel, but you know she’s not doing it to be mean.

She hums softly at your silence and gently tips up your chin. You meet her gaze for the second time, heart caught in your throat.

“Am I perhaps your type?” She murmurs, gaze not quite soft but not without affection. You swallow and give a tiny nod.

After a moment, you manage to croak out, “Why?”

She smiles sadly. Wistfully. Mournfully. “It was brought to my attention that I've been neglecting my duties to you as your wife.” Her thumb trails along your cheek. “We haven’t even had a proper marriage night, have we?”

You stay silent. You can’t breathe. There’s no way this is happening. You must’ve fallen back asleep and this is just another dream.

“I should’ve seen it sooner,” she murmurs. “Am I too late, or will you let me fulfill my duty to you?”

Your heart shatters and leaps at the same time. Duty. That’s what you are to her. Nothing more than a commitment of honor. And yet…

You can’t find it in you to say no. A stronger women would, perhaps, but not you. You’re just so weak when it comes to her.

You nod, not trusting your voice. She gives that sad little smile again and leans in.

Your heart stops when her lips press to yours, so soft and gentle. It’s like kissing a cloud. You can’t help it; the way you respond so eagerly. You lean into it, melt into it, chase her lips with yours when she pulls back.

Your hand comes up to cup her face, pulling her back to you. You press into her, desperation filling every inch of your body.

She doesn’t stop you. In fact, her lips part and her tongue gently swipes against your lower lip. You immediately part your own and she licks into your mouth. You moan, soft and high-pitched and needy.

You gasp when she suddenly presses you back, guiding you back against the wall. She pulls away for just a moment, and you’re suddenly filled with fire.

You twirl her around, caging her up against the wall. Your hands fall to her hips, slide up her sides. Your lips move to her neck, fueled by the burning need to taste her skin. You suck gently, leaving small marks you know will fade.

Your hands come up a little higher, resting just below her bust. You’ve wanted to touch her for so long. To kiss your way down to her breasts and lavish them with love.

You finally have the chance now, but the moment is marred by the breaking of your heart in your chest. It’s not what you wanted, but it’ll have to do anyway.

Your fingers gently trace along the neckline of her gown, shying away from what you crave so badly. You’re so conflicted; your tongue lightly tracing along her skin.

Satine lets out a soft little sigh, almost impatient sounding. It jolts you from your thoughts, pulling you back into the moment. You swallow. Take a breath. And finally cup her breasts in your hands.

Even through the thin fabric of her nightwear, her breasts are soft. Warm, with pebbled nipples. You want to touch them. You want to kiss them. You need to.

So you do. You slip down the neckline of her dress, gaze wide as her skin is revealed to you. Dusky pink nipples, smooth milky skin. You’re pressing your mouth to her before you can even think about it.

You kiss her breast, closing your lips around her pebbled nipple. She makes a soft sound, yearning and aching. It ignites your body, sending heat straight between your legs.

But you remain gentle. You worship her breast, alternating between sucking and licking at her nipple. Then you switch breasts, head getting dizzy with overwhelming relief at finally getting to taste her skin.

You pull away, nuzzling your face against her chest. You can barely think, so breathless and desperate with need. You want her. You need her.

You don’t realize she’s wrapped her arms around you until you feel her gently rub your back. Her voice breaks through your haze, soft murmurs of praise filling the air.

She gently pulls away and you bite back a whimper of loss. But she takes your hand, a unreadable look on her face. “Come, sweet darling. It’s not a proper marriage night if we ignore our bed.”

You follow her, head slowly clearing of fuzz. It’s a little embarrassing, how easily you melted with just a few kisses to her breasts. But she doesn’t seem upset.

In fact, she guides you to the bed, laying you down with a pillow under your head. She presses a kiss to your lips, running her fingers up and down your thigh. “You’re such a pretty girl. I’m sorry for not seeing it sooner.”

You’re too distracted by her hands, more heat gathering in your core every time her fingers get close to your pussy.

“Let me work for your forgiveness, darling,” she murmurs. “I want to know my pretty wife.”

You melt at her words, dazed at her praise. “Please,” you whisper, and she finally smiles warmly.

“Such good manners.” Her fingers slide higher up your thigh, just barely teasing the edge of your soaked panties. “I’ve got you, darling. Just let me take care of you.”

You nod, and then whimper as she slips her fingers under your panties. Her fingertips dip between your folds, smearing slick as she traces from your hole to your clit. Pleasure spikes as she circles it, making you squirm and moan.

Her fingers feel so much better than yours, your arousal so much stronger. You feel like you could cum just like this, from the barest of touches.

“Please, Satine,” you gasp out. “Oh, please, Duchess!”

The use of her title seems to be the key because she listens. Her fingers press to your hole, pushing two inside without hesitation. You take them greedily, slick gushing from your pussy as she starts to scissor her fingers. Stretching you out and rubbing against your walls at the same time.

Her fingers are longer than yours, and you arch with a cry when she presses against a spot inside you. She shushes you with a kiss to your stomach before bullying her fingers against the spot.

You writhe, moans and eventually sobs spilling from your lips. It feels so good. And when she rubs her thumb against your clit you come with a cry of her name.

She fucks you through your orgasm before gently pulling out. She lifts her fingers to her lips, making direct eye contact with you as she sucks your slick from her hand. It sets your skin ablaze and you just gaze with wide eyes.

“You taste as good as you look,” she murmurs, a smirk playing on her lips. Her eyes seem to gleam, and you know. It doesn’t matter if she’s doing this to duty or for love. All you know is you’re in for a long night.

And you’re determined to enjoy every moment of it.

[interdimensionalhellscapeportal]

Star Wars Headcanon (I can't draw this but I invite anyone with any skill level to do so, I want to SEE IT but sadly I am Photoshop illiterate) Instead of being a polite, cruel & cold version of himself, Sith!Obi-Wan Kenobi is literally just *xxxtra* Ewan McGregor as Black Mask, mask included. He owns a nightclub and wears velvet and lace and leather, he has made Commander Cody dance naked on a bar table in the middle of a 79s hostage situation, every undercover Jedi Shadow that tries to infiltrate his organization ends up doing his dirty work and then getting tossed off a pier with extreme prejudice (looking at you Quinlan Vos), he once told Admiral Thrawn his art collection was "gauche", when Jedi!Maul was hunting him down, Sith!Obi went to Dathomir and skinned a bunch of his relatives and then wore the skin over his mask (double mask!) and called it avant garde self expression, and so on ad nauseum.

Is there a plucky femme anti-hero heroine who is going to shove a flashbang into his brocade jacket and blow him to smithereens? Probably- I'm not SAYING Ahsoka/Asajj/Trace&Rafa/Barriss/LattsRazzi etc should be crammed into a Birds of Prey style allies of convenience followup illustration (but I'm thinking it kinda fucking loud)

[nuvomica]

how you guys writing obkn no age gap, no angst, no padme, femme obi-wan, clever anakin, modern au, meeting as adults, younger and emotional obi-wan, communicative dom anakin. that's not obkn girl that's your ocs. what in the god damn

[chupacabraatemybrother]

I think a major bug in human interaction and misunderstanding (which leads to hostility) is due to black and white or binary thinking. I also think that this type of thinking is a very human trait that comes to us inherently, and if we're not careful enough we can find ourselves slipping into it at any time.

I was thinking about that scene in Star Wars Revenge of the Sith when Obi-Wan says to Anakin "only a Sith deals in absolutes." It's really funny because in that moment Obi-Wan is also using an absolute, thus negating his statement: Obi-Wan is definitely not a Sith.

Humans do this all the time in so many places, especially places like Tumblr in which discourse is high. People pick and choose which binaries they will reject and which ones they will embrace and enforce. On Tumblr for example, which is a primarily liberal space, we're pretty much in agreement that things such as disability, autism, gender, etc, are not black and white binaries and there is so much nuance, not even among a gradient but among a matrix.

These same people will then turn around and use other binaries such as rich versus poor, Democrat versus Republican, urban versus rural, etc. (I could write a whole post on how liberal culture both places rural living and being "one with nature" on a pedestal, while also vilifying the people that already live here and our established practices of living in nature, including [especially] hunting).

An example of this selective thinking I've witnessed is the whole discourse seen in some lgbtqa+ spaces surrounding the inclusion of Ace/aro individuals: people that don't neatly fit the binary (ex: aro but het) are considered with suspicion.

I've also heard stories of masc non-binary people not fitting in in various genderqueer spaces because they come across as too masculine to be perceived as gender non-conforming, but oddly enough I've minimally encountered the same issue when it's someone being femme.

TL:DR; everyone falls into the binary thinking trap sometimes because it is a inherently human trait. However there will always be someone who doesn't fit neatly into any of the binaries that you have assigned to the world, and people need to be prepared to face and challenge these assumptions as they become a exposed to different ways of thinking and existing in this world. There is no one right way to be a human, and people on the internet need to stop acting like there is.

[aftergloom]

I would very much like to hear about ur dark side cult and am willing to trade the information given with random songs but they're in binary

I spent years in the rave scene listening to beepy clicky music that you can't really dance to so I'd probably be into that, ngl.

So the thing about the Bando Gora is that you can't talk about it without discussing a couple of characters, so I'll try to keep this fairly high-level, but some spoilers may follow for a couple of the Legends books. (And since we're getting a new new canon Dark Side cult with Darth Maul: Red, White, and Black in May, maybe we'll see some similarities. Canon likes to nod back to Legends once in a while, and I'm all for it.)

The Bando Gora appears in only a handful of places, namely Darth Maul: Lockdown, Darth Plagueis, a couple of comics, an RPG, and a videogame called Star Wars Bounty Hunter featuring Jango Fett.

It served as a terrorist organization and dark side cult that operated primarily in the outer rim, gaining power over a couple of decades before culminating in the death of its last High Priestess, a former Jedi and the lost padawan of Count Dooku, Komari Vosa -- one part femme fatale, one part pain in Sidious' ass, and the very same Komari Vosa that shows up in Darth Maul: Lockdown on Cog Hive Seven.

She was captured and indoctrinated into the Bando Gora following the battle at Galidraan along with twenty of her cohorts (whom she later killed while in captivity), and rose through the ranks rapidly to helm it as its leader.

She died in 32 BBY when a bounty was set on her head because the cult had amassed entirely too much power and Sidious was getting a little shifty about it. Jango Fett won the bounty along with the prestige of becoming the pattern for the Clone army, but it was Vosa's former Jedi Master (now Darth Tyranus) that snapped her neck, ending her life, and decapitating the cult. Vosa was completely relegated to Legends as of The Secrets of the Sith, but as the story goes, once Dooku snuffed her out, he took her curved lightsaber hilts and gave them to his sparkly new apprentice, Asajj Ventress.

As indoctrination goes, cult members were subjected to neurotoxin poisoning and tortured to open their minds to the Dark Side of the Force, the physical results of those rituals manifesting in glowing blue eyes, and blackened and mottled skin. "The Force shall free me" was taken to the letter, because Bando Gora Thrall emerged from the indoctrination process free of pain, free of fear, and relentless -- and without a will of their own. Thrall often wore Nemoidean skin masks --- possibly another aspect of the depersonalization process -- and Captains looked like this snazzy dude:

The cult had ties to the Hutts and Sebolto's drug cartel on Malastare, a notable tidbit because one of its last remaining ties to canon exists in one little scene where Obi-Wan Kenobi is offered Death Sticks -- the primary means of luring in new recruits to the cult by altering their minds, and reducing their resistance to indoctrination by creating a narcotic dependency with the "Death Sticks." As if calling them "Death Sticks" to begin with wasn't wildly enticing. /s

"You wanna buy some death sticks?""You don't want to sell me death sticks.""I don't wanna sell you death sticks.""You want to go home and rethink your life.""I wanna go home and rethink my life."

―Elan Sel'Sabagano and Obi-Wan Kenobi

Other points of interest (if you're considering a vacation) involve the spot where the Bando Gora set up shop -- a lovely little place in the inner rim in Bogden's orbit: Kohlma.

Named after Colma (in California), the burial moon was covered pole to pole in tombstones and suffered Bogden's frequent gravitational shifts. A lot of the early concept art lends itself to horror (hi I love it!), which is probably why, at the first mention of a "burial moon" in Darth Maul: Lockdown, I went absolutely feral and started collecting every tidbit I could get my hands on.

The Bando Gora had a citadel out there, which ultimately became Vosa's tomb, and the memorial moon was a fitting choice because the first members of the cult were said to be graverobbers, thieves, and assassins. 💀💀💀

Thank you for the ask. Revisiting this stuff right before Camp NaNoWriMo is always a good refresher for me, since I'll be journeying right back here on April 1st. 😊

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

tuesday again 3/28/2023

accidentally read five books.

listening

look i know there's a new fall out boy but i have conflicting opinions about that band bc i am no longer seventeen.

MARINA (formerly Marina and the Diamonds) was another artist coming up when i was in high school, but even though Family Jewels was one of the first albums i really got into, she has soundtracked far less of my life compared to FOB so listening to her is a little less fraught. nothing else has taken up space in my brain this week like the lyrics to hollywood: "hollywood infected your brain/you wanted kissing in the rain".

kind of obsessed how the music video cuts out an entire chunk of lyrics about dissatisfied flight attendants? also jesus christ this came out in 2010. BABY marina

originally stuck in my brain bc my sister and i were talking about the musical chicago, and this song contains the lyrics "oh my god you look just like shakira/no wait you're catherine zeta/actually my name's marina"

-

reading

Star Wars: Dark Disciple by Christie Golden. ventress has never been my favorite of count dooku’s batmanesque kidnapped children. i respect her! she’s awful! i want to see her flirt with obi-wan more but maul (my beloved) has always had more screen time and depth.

it’s spackled together from most of a cancelled eight-episode clone wars arc and it kind of shows? this is not to say that star wars books are uninterested in the interiority of their characters, but we rarely get in their heads. star wars books are much more focused on what it looks like in the movie— there are big cinematic set pieces where it’s important to know exactly where everyone is in a fight.

golden writes a competent action scene. this is more than i can say for many star wars writers.

^ i am shoving my fist into my mouth and screaming.

anyway, one of my worst character traits is a latent previously discussed fondness for steampunk and a less latent fondness for urban fantasy.

i read Alexis Hall's Iron and Velvet Kate Kane book a million years ago possibly at the rec of @bronanlynchh during the new hampshire internship, one of the worst depressive periods of my life, but i did consume a lot of gay romance during that period. bc im in my noir era now, reread it and realized there were more! so i devoured them all over the weekend.

to quote @quaraxuanzenith who seems to be the only other person here who has read them recently,

have you ever thought, "Twilight sure is a book, but it would be better if Bella ( a ) realized that Edward is a weird controlling creep, ( b ) dumped him, ( c ) came out to herself as lesbian, and ( d ) went off to become a paranormal private investigator"?

these are just fun nonsense! i loved them and will buy paper copies after i move! i would not call these "spicy", but she falls in and out of the arms of SO many femmes and fatales (who sometimes overlap). there are SO many women throwing themselves at her. it is a delightful way of nodding at the genre's roots bc kate has some game! she doesn't have zero game! she not an oblivious useless lesbian archetype either! but she's usually like ?????? this person is OUT OF MY LEAGUE and never actually realizes a tall, tortured, sad, purple-eyed lady in a trenchcoat is catnip to nearly all wlw.

i think the third book hits its stride and flings you into a rapidly entangling web of loyalties and motivations that i really enjoy in a noir. i like how the author feels no need to write the YA vampire book trilogy she survived. i like how kate has a life going on apart from the stuff that happens in the books. she does not feel like she started existing the moment the book opens.

i finally understand the little old lady love of endless mystery series, bc this is some really comforting reading. i would read twenty of these. i trust that this author's got me and may fling some twists or red herrings at me but ultimately i won't turn the page and she'll be beaten in the street for being an out lesbian. okay so she does get whumped in the street but it's for case reasons

-

watching

virtuosity (1995, dir leonard). the tagline of this film is "Hell hath no fury like a composite of 183 serial killers. Meet Sid 6.7"

is this a Good film? oh god no. if you've seen the tv show interview with the vampire, it has the same contrasting vibes between the two leads, where one is turning in an incredible performance about a black man trying to hold onto family and dignity while the other is prancing around like a deranged show pony. except without the clarity of purpose or production values of a big budget amc tv drama. however, russell crowe (guy i love to see) put his whole ass into this performance. this is not a half-assed acting effort. it is a joy to watch him zip around screen while denzel washington is giving a very good performance as a disgraced, widowed ex-cop.

this really throws a wrench into my whole "if a movie is about being afraid of a robot it's about being afraid of women" bc crowe is not a woman, but he is a malevolent neural network given an android body. a private company has a contract for a police training tool (the neural network trained on 183 serial killers who you can fight in VR) and is testing the interface on prisoners. i wish this movie had anything to say or critique about this three-way partnership other than using it as an inciting incident for what turns into a chase movie. the movie does not attempt to convince you this would be a good idea in a different private company's dev team but i wish the movie spent slightly less time going AAAAAA HOW TO STOP and any time at all going AAAAAAA HOW DID WE LET THIS HAPPEN

i would call this film camp on vibes alone except it is almost completely uninterested in sensuality. the special effects have not aged very well at all, but the film has the same production designer (Nilo Rodis-Jamero) as Johnny Mnemomic (also 1995) so the film Looks.

why? it was leaving canopy soon and when my gender isn't "woman in the same way a sailing ship is a woman" it's "nineties movie club scenes"

-

playing

weird west! still! (image from the steam page bc i keep forgetting to take screenshots)

not terribly worried about the somewhat repetitive nature of the locations themselves, bc the enemy encounters are varied enough it feels like solving a new puzzle each time. also im still having fun.

i have been picking off guys from around the edges of enemy encampments with a silenced rifle and then tanking through this rest with a shotgun and liberal bandage application, as i am wont to do in shooty games, but i cannot currently break my husband out of a mine run by...cannibals? human traffickers to the cannibals? the xp-giving bad guys without getting one of my companions killed. i really don't want to ditch ann lara (i'm not entirely sure what her deal is? sort of a smooth-talking hustler archetype? but really good with pistols?) who has been with me for most of the eight hours i've played this game. the sheriff/my neighbor, along for the ride for her own reasons, has four times as much health as either of us so she's staying. she's been the only one left alive most of my attempts at this one FUCKING cave.

so i am looping back out into the world (sorry husband) to go think about some real tactics. practice my dodge rolls in a less tense environment. perhaps level up some guns and armor. now you might say "kay! isn't it worrying that you're hitting such a big difficulty cliff?" and to that i say "not really bc i cannot stress the amount of simply dicking around and exploring ive done, also i am not a clever woman."

-

making

fallow week

[mortalheartache]

About Thirza!

─── ⋆⋅ ☆ ⋅⋆ ───

18 ★ She/Her★ Capricorn ★ INTP

──────────

Hello! I’m Thirza, admin of mortalheartache! I have a passion for writing and can’t wait to share the filth I write here with you :)

Always looking for mutuals and friends, my DMs are open!

I hate sand, like actually. Not for the reference. My reasons are the same as Anakin’s, though. I do not go to beaches.

──────────Faves:

☆ Movies (General): Barbie (2023), American Psycho, Fight Club, Mean Girls, Heathers, Legally Blonde, Scream (1998), Labyrinth, The Dark Crystal, The Princess Bride

☆ Movies (SW): Revenge of the Sith (I cry), Attack of the Clones, Return of the Jedi

☆ TV Shows (General): The Last of Us, Lost (I don’t watch much TV)

☆ TV Shows (SW): Obi-Wan Kenobi, The Mandalorian

☆ Video Games: The Sims 4, Stardew Valley, Doki Doki Literature Club, any Zelda game (I know so much lore)

☆ Musical Artists: Måneskin, Nirvana, Mindless Self Indulgence, Depeche Mode, Nine Inch Nails, Doja Cat, David Bowie, Nicki Minaj, Kesha, Britney Spears, Arctic Monkeys, Radiohead, The Cure, Dead Kennedys, Bad Religion, Sleater-Kinney, Ramones, Sex Pistols, Violent Femmes

[lostinsnow]

Femme fatale?? 👀❤️

Modern WLW Obikin Au! Obi-Wan is Anakin's boss and a major filing error at the company has given Anakin the perfect opportunity to make her move.

Slight explicit warning hehe

With a strained, yet impossibly kind smile that illuminated her gentle eyes, Obi-Wan stepped back from Anakin’s desk and made to return to her private office. “Have a good weekend, Anakin.” 

“Wait!” Anakin shot up so quickly that her chair rolled back to thud against the wall. What am I doing? “I can help you!” 

Obi-Wan turned to her again, brows angled high and lips parted around a breath of shock. “Anakin, sweetheart,” she demurred in her perfect voice, sending a pulse of heat to Anakin’s gut, “that’s a very kind offer, but I truly can’t expect you to do that.” 

“I can,” insisted Anakin with a nod. Spending her weekend organizing papers sounded absolutely miserable, but if it gave her one extra minute to talk to Obi-Wan she’d suffer through it happily. “I want to. You shouldn’t have to sacrifice your weekend to fix someone else’s mistake.” 

“And neither should you,” asserted Obi-Wan. She sighed, free hand pressing to her jaw in a characteristic display of deep thought. Anakin squirmed beneath her gaze, feeling awkward still stood up behind her desk. “You’re sweet for offering, really, but I can’t accept. Even with the two of us, it will take all of tonight and tomorrow. I’m sure a young girl like you has better things to do on a Friday night. Besides, the cleaners require the office to be clear within the next hour, you’d have to come back to my apartment with me.” 

Were she any less experienced with restraining her desire, Anakin’s eyes would have positively fluttered at the idea of going back to Obi-Wan’s apartment with her. All manner of sordid fantasies bloomed in her mind. Falling into one another’s arms the moment they stepped through the door. Sleeping overnight to wake up to Obi-Wan’s firm and possessive hands on her body. Kneeling before Obi-Wan’s couch to eat her out beneath the tight fabric of her skirt. 

A single, shameful pulse of arousal between Anakin’s legs reminded her to remain focused. 

“That’s okay! I mean, if it’s okay with you,” she amended with a coy bite of her lip. Jaw lowered, she aimed a calculated expression of sweet innocence up at her boss. “Please... let me help, Mrs. Kenobi. You’re the best boss I’ve ever had, I want to help you.”

[spindlephysalia]

Anakin & Obi-Wan and Transness

Effort to condense a ramble I had in DMs but like...

I find Anakin and Obi-Wan fascinating to study under a queer lens because they're both such...types of egg. Anakin is someone who is shaped at every turn by femininity; birthed and raised by Smee without a father at all before having his life revolve around Padme. Speaking as someone who idolised a lot of high-femme characters when I was a child before becoming enby, it's hard for me to see the child Anakin's relation to the high-femme Padme without shades of longing colouring it; especially with how she switches beween explicitly constructed and very naturalistic modes of gender expression.

(I think there's also something worth noting in Anakin winding up repairing threepio, the world's most faggot droid. Homosexual magnetism in action.)

And it's interesting to me that there's something almost...hollow? inside Anakin by the time of the clone wars. He's reckless, even suicidal, trying to prove himself through his exposure to violence. And his relationship to violence is...

For personal reasons I read a lot about gay men who operated as parts of the british empire, and with that and my own experience being groomed for those positions I think there's a phenomenon where closeted or even semi-open homosexuals (in a very broad use of the term) within the empire could throw themselves into its institutions to try and assuage that hole where they don't fit into it properly.

I don't think it's too much of a stretch to interpret Obi-Wan as that kind of person. He certainly threw himself into the will of the Force - more than any other Jedi, he seemed perfectly willing to allow his self to dissolve away - and I think he recognised that same emptiness in Anakin and tried to communicate to him "I know this feeling, and here is how I salve it, here's the institution I sublimate my sense of self into".

(Here's where I note that Obi-Wan's romantic partner is also a woman whose class position forces her to dress in elaborate, highly-constructed high-femme outfits. Who doesn't like his beard. The main difference between the two is that Obi-Wan was older when he met Satine, and had been in the Jedi for longer, so he treats her as temptation and pushes aside everything she makes him feel.)

But Anakin is never able to force himself into the mould the Jedi want, the mould Obi-Wan offers him and that subconcious failure of communication winds up being the rift Palpatine exploits to drive the two apart and trap Anakin into the persona of the hypermasculine warrior he adopted during the clone wars; literally sealing him inside an outfit not of his choice and taking his ability to self-express the way Padme did.

In conclusion; gay gay homo sexual gay.