#female armor bingo

[bikiniarmorbattledamage]

So, naturally we had to, now the game is actually out, bingo the CENSORED outfit in Stellar Blade. Credit to HarryNinetyFour for showing all seventy-four outfits, and Kotaku for this article where they propose that Eve is at her sexiest when she's got more on.

Okay... maybe not that but...

Seriously, if you're playing to fap - this game has you covered. But it also has a few really interesting, covering outfits that seem to reflect fantasies of fashion and comfort.

The only thing that's really not present is any sort of actual military like BDUs or combat jumpsuits. That's kinda weird, even Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain let you put BDUs on Quiet.

And that bit is weird is, based on what I've seen people who've been playing the game saying - there is really a story about her being a soldier and fighting for a cause there. But you'd never know that based on the ongoing outrage.

The outrage is weird and sad

So as you can probably guess, the continuing riot of "censorship" here is pretty absurd. It's got to the point where they even bullied the Stellar Blade's X/Twitter account to un-repost the Kotaku article that praises the game.

But here's the thing, in all the years I've had to deal with brodudes doing this kind of nonsense in various online platforms etc, I have never seen one that is happy.

YouTuber Moon Channel did a two part (1, 2) series on a different drama in South Korea involving a Gacha game that dared not to be pointlessly horny, but here's the general take away.

English speaking brodudes in this situation are imagining that Stellar Blade is some sort of iconic work coming from the anti-woke wonderland where everyone is happy. The reality is:

South Korea has a deeply hierarchical society which essentially tells young people they are to obey and not to speak up

The economy and nepotism is such that unless you are born into a rich family, your employment prospects are downright depressing

Many young men in South Korea develop a lot of resentment toward women primarily because they are told that in order to enter a (heterosexual) relationship they will need to demonstrate they have the ability to be a great provider, and then are denied those opportunities by the economy and nepotism

On top of all this, the government takes a "we know whats best for you" approach to the extent that not only is porn banned but you will be expected to supply your identity information if you want to look up basic sexual educational materials

They would find it to be an absolute nightmare realm.

The reality is that in the "woke" world that brodudes fear, we'd probably see a lot more eroticism in art, including games, and it'd be of the more focused, sincere variety rather than that directed by creepy marketing guy.

All we really need to do is accept each other as people, appreciate each other's humanity and boundaries. Then we can both enjoy a sexy paradise, but also unite and deal with the assholes who keep oppressing us economically and socially.

Wouldn't that be nice?

-wincenworks

[aptericia]

Here you go, @wherefore-whinnies! I forgot about Serios tbh, but her outfit is indeed very silly. You’d think the legendary warrior saint would look a bit more intimidating…

Half mark for head protection, because her circlet-thing is clearly intended as a piece of jewelry rather than armor. I was also being generous here—I think she could score “Random patches of skin uncovered” (depending on your definition of “random”) and “More material used on limbs than to cover vital organs” (since there’s more armor on her limbs, if not more material overall)

[gloomwitchwrites]

Rescue

Thranduil x Female Elf Reader

Content & Warnings: canon-typical violence, brief blood, secret feelings, mutual affection

Word Count: 800

A/N: Requested by @kakashipandadog for 3.5k Spooky Bingo (Cult Sacrifice)

You’re captured on a scouting mission, believing that you’re being left to your fate. At your most desperate moment, help arrives.

ao3 // taglist // main masterlist // 3.5k spooky bingo masterlist

The stones are singing. Chanting.

That is all you see and sense. There is solid rock beneath your palm and pressed against your cheek. Voices upon voices all communing in unison wrap around you, and yet there is something deeper here you cannot place. Perhaps if you just blink away the haze or rub at your eyes, your vision will clear and it will come to you.

Have you failed your king? You must have. Why else are you so disoriented?

You attempt to stretch, to move your limbs, but scratchy resistance greets you, rubbing against your leather armor and bits of exposed skin.

Groaning, you close your eyes.

Breathe in. Breathe out.

The chanting becomes clearer—becomes guttural.

No. The stones are not singing. Nor do the trees. These are voices. Living and present.

On your next exhalation, you twist just enough and see a dark sky above you. There are no stars—just a void. Around you are torches, burning bright with fire but providing no warmth. You are tied down with rope to a large stone slab. Around you are orcs, circling your restrained body, beating their chests and stomping their feet.

From their mouths comes the language of their maker. Black Speech. An abomination. You do not know the words or what they mean but you recognize it for what it is.

There is no hope here.

You are to be sacrificed to something and no one is coming to rescue you.

This was supposed to be simple scouting. King Thranduil gave you instructions, but you've failed to return. Will he send someone to find you? Or is your fate already sealed?

With what little movement you have, you attempt to search for your weapons. While your bow and quiver of arrows are gone, the orcs may have overlooked the hidden daggers. Orcs are not particularly smart and it’s entirely possible you might find something sharp to cut your way out. Defending yourself is a different matter. There are several dozen orcs, and if you only wield a small knife, you may not make it far once you’ve freed yourself from your bonds.

The chanting increases, becoming a crescendo. One of the orcs breaks from the group moving toward you with their serrated blade held high. It raises it over its head, ready and poised to bring it down.

Your fingers splay wide, roaming down to grasp at your boot. This is your last chance.

It's malicious grin wanes, body seizing suddenly as if frozen in ice as it prepares to drive the blade home.

You don't know what to make of this until your gaze drops and lands on the blade sticking out the orcs stomach. The point of the metal is coated in black blood.

Your eyes widen as it's yanked out and the orc falls sideways, revealing King Thranduil.

He's ethereal and calm, blade already spinning to strike another orc down.

He came for you.

King Thranduil did not come alone. There are several other Elves with him, each with blade or bow, cutting through the small horde of orcs with ease.

Hope rises, and with it comes a wave of determination. With another twist, you manage to reach your boot, an in it, a dagger. Removing it, you turn it on the rope, sawing as fast as you can as everything around you descends into chaos.

The threads fray, and the rope snaps. You move to the next, already feeling lighter. It is unraveling—loosening—but it is entirely too slow. At the moment, you are at the mercy of others. Though you are being rescued, you still have to depend on yourself.

An orc comes rushing forward as just as you start on the final tightened rope holding you in place. You saw at it manically, breath coming in quick bursts as you ready for the incoming blow. You might not have the use of your legs but you have your arms.

The orc swings—and the rope snaps.

Turning the blade handle around in your palm, you thrust upward, sinking the knife into the orc’s throat.

It gurgles, dark blood bubbling in its mouth.

Withdrawing the knife brings more blood with it, and the orc keels over, hitting the ground hard.

King Thranduil appears behind it, sword raised and at the ready, his gaze following the corpse. That icy stare turns on you, becoming soft and concerned. There is momentarily flare of affection that blooms in your chest.

You hastily swat the feeling away. It’s not something you can act on.

“You came for me,” you say, voice slightly raspy from disuse.

That softness only intensifies in his eyes, and it resonates, wrapping you up in quiet comfort.

“I couldn’t bear the thought of leaving you behind.”

taglist:

@firelightinferno @protosslady @thetaekwondofeline @glassgulls @childofyuggoth

@coffeecaketornado @glitterypirateduck @foxxy-126 @km-ffluv @sweetbutpsychobutsweet

@singleteapot @tiredmetalenthusiast @miaraei @cherryofdeath @ferns-fics

@ninman82 @waves-against-a-cliff @eternallyvenus @beebeechaos @smileykiddie08

@whisperwispxx @chaostwinsofdestruction @weasleytwins-41 @thewulf

[the12thnightproject]

Chapter Four: Minor Skirmishes - Okatsu discovers why Mitsunari needs a bodyguard, and another plate of stewed eel meets its doom.

Mitsunari x OC; Nobunaga x Mai

Previous Chapter

Logline - In order to protect a political alliance, Katusko and Mitsunari must pretend an engagement. But this “all business” arrangement is threatened by a coup against Nobunaga… and by feelings.

From the Military Notes of Ishida Mitsunari…

Generally, a skirmish can be a minor battle, or even short fight, as part of a larger military campaign, a smaller force drawing out a larger to test resilience, or to gather information about the size of the opposing army. Occasionally, it is itself the cause of the larger campaign.

Or, sometimes, it’s simply a matter of a misunderstanding, an incident in which two groups are in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Personal comments:

Being engaged, even if it is only a pretense, takes more effort than battle. At least in battle, one only has to wear armor, define and implement a strategy, and pay attention to the commander.

Being engaged? Requires one to converse.

While Lady Okatsu seems pleasant enough, I am not convinced she is necessary. I’m not ungrateful - I appreciate the effort that Mitsuhide has made on my behalf to acquire her expertise. However, I have never had any difficulty focusing on reading in the past and believe that on my own, I can discourage interruptions of any sort. Events have already been set into motion now, and it’s too late to switch courses. My engagement has been announced – for it to be unannounced within a day of the announcement would simply cause too much confusion.

At least Lady Okatsu is competent… and… There is something about her which is familiar - I believe we have met before. Though I know little about women, I am at least aware that saying, “I think we have met before, but I cannot quite remember you,” would not be received positively.

Getting attacked by a mysterious intruder was not on my Sengoku bingo card.

I brought my dagger up, and my attacker’s sword met it with a ‘clank.’ “Wait – I mean you no harm.”

“Harmless people don’t sneak into rooms through the ceiling.” I held my dagger steady in front of me. It wasn’t the best defense against a sword, but if someone was coming after me, I was going to make sure to do some damage of my own.

“My apologies for disturbing you. I seem to have landed in the wrong room.” My maybe-not-an-attacker edged backward. “Perhaps you could pretend you had a bad dream?”

Mai had given me her room for the duration of my stay here since she had moved into Nobunaga’s. Was my attacker after Mai?

Except… now that my heart wasn’t thundering in my ears, it occurred to me that my attacker’s voice was familiar. “Sasuke?”

“Yes. Do I know you?” Like me, he kept his weapon ready, but his posture relaxed somewhat.

I found the lantern and lit it, then belatedly remembered to double check that my kimono was fastened shut.

My moderately awesome ninja friend stood in the middle of the room, squinting at me. He pushed his glasses up on his nose and pulled down his mask. “Katsu? Fascinating. This is your most effective disguise to date.” He blinked a few times, darting a quick glance at my cleavage, then back to my face. “Wait. ‘Katsu’ was the disguise, wasn’t it? This is who you really are.”

“More or less.” I combed my fingers through my hair and stuck it behind my ears. “Katsuko… although I suppose I should get used to being called Okatsu.”

He laughed. “I’m obviously not a moderately awesome ninja if I never detected you were a woman.”

As far as I was aware, Mitsuhide and Mai were the only two people who instantly realized I’m female, so he was in good company. “What did you want with Mai?” I hoped the two of them weren’t conducting an affair under Nobunaga’s nose. At the very least, he’d consider that a serious insult to his honor.

“I need to return to our home, er, village for a long visit, and came to say goodbye.” Sasuke wandered to the writing desk, where I had left out my brush and paper.

“Oh… is Mai the girl you were talking about earlier this summer?” Even then Sasuke had seemed rather attached to her, no matter his claim of platonic friendship.

Sasuke nodded. Then he indicated the paper and brush on the desk. “If I write her a note, can you get it to her?” He paused, then added, “Why are you here?”

“Here in Mai’s room? Or here in Azuchi castle?” I plopped back down on the futon and rummaged through my pack until I found – yes, still had some dried pears left. I offered some to Sasuke, as it had been our tradition when we encountered each other on the road. Also, I was still hungry, as Mitsuhide’s roofieing of Masamune had effectively ruined dinner.

“Both.” Sasuke accepted the offer of snacks.

“I’m in Mai’s room because she is in Nobunaga’s. I’m in Azuchi because… well… it’s complicated.” I gave him as brief of an explanation as possible. “So, while we are at Genba castle for a month or so, I get to portray an Oda Princess.”

“You lead a very interesting life, Kats… er, Okatsu.” He folded up the message then turned to me and with a bizarre change of topic asked, “What’s your opinion of the Azuchi warlords? Have you met Ieyasu? Has any of this…” he gestured to my things now spread out on the futon, “touched Ieyasu?”

“We met. I have not touched him. He has not touched me. And as for the first question, if you are asking for reasons of spying, I’m not going to tell you.” I might be only a ‘temp,’ but temporary loyalty is still loyalty. “Remember, I do know who you work for.” Kenshin and Nobunaga might be in a truce, but I was not confident that it would last.

“I’m asking out of pure academic interest. I’m rather an admirer …” He paused, then seemed to reconsider his words. “Since I am going to be gone for a while, I want to make sure my friend is safe.”

Sounded like a lie. Or maybe a truth wrapped inside a lie. But I didn’t think he meant any harm to Nobunaga or the rest of the people in Azuchi. “As long as she is with Nobunaga, she’s perfectly safe from his vassals and allies.” Although as Nobunaga’s woman, she’d be a target for enemies. I didn’t need to point that out to Sasuke. “As much as I’m able, I’ll keep an eye on her as well.”

Hm, Sasuke hadn’t mentioned where his and Mai’s village was, but it wouldn’t hurt to ask him to look for my brother. I got out the drawing that Francisco had made for me. “I know I’ve asked you before, but please, especially if you are on a coast, if you see Toshiie, tell him how to find me.”

Sasuke refamiliarized himself with the drawing of my brother. “I will. Thank you for watching over Mai… and take care of yourself as well.” He bowed, then scampered back into the ceiling.

“You too, Sasuke. Beware of carnivorous trees.” I listened as his soft footsteps faded away into the night.

I would miss him. Not that I had been able to predict when we would run into each other; but knowing Sasuke was no longer roaming the byways of Japan made me feel even more alone than ever.

“Sorry that I got food all over it – at least… it’s not blood?” I handed Mai the kimono she had loaned me. She had stopped by “my” room with more clothing for me. “I’ll be more careful with this one.”

“Don’t worry about it. It was inevitable.” She held up a light blue kimono with a darker blue pattern, and a mint green one with silver embroidery. “I think these will do, until I can complete the custom ones. Do you like them?”

I nodded. They weren’t really my style, but at least they weren’t pink, and she didn’t have to keep giving me her own clothes. “They’re very pretty. But even if I didn’t like them, I would wear whatever they want me to.”

“On that note, Mitsuhide reminded me that he wants you in pinks.” I made a face at that, and she laughed. “There are many shades of pink, and you’d look good in most of them.”

I wondered if there was any specific reason that I was required to dress in pink other than the fact that Mitsuhide knew I didn’t like it. “Did he say why? Is it an official shade for Oda Princesses to wear?”

“I don’t know.” She handed me the blue kimono and busied herself with displaying the mint one on the kimono rack. “Mitsuhide does and says a lot of things I don’t understand. But deep down, he’s a good person. Also. He can read minds, so watch out.”

Sure.

Odds were that, like Aki, Mitsuhide was simply very observant. Clearly, I wasn’t going to get any helpful data out of Mai. “So be it. Pink. Maybe it’s Mitsunari’s favorite shade?” Though if that were the case, why had he asked me if I liked blue?

She looked over from where she was smoothing out invisible wrinkles. “Mitsunari wouldn’t notice what color you’re wearing unless he was required to memorize uniforms for battle.” Then she clapped her hands over her mouth. “I’m sorry. He’s your fiancée. I didn’t mean that way it sounded. He’s lovely, a perfect angel… but a little…”

“Absentminded. I’ve noticed. And, reminder, fake fiancé.” I shrugged into the kimono she’d handed me. It was so soft! I mostly lived in cheaper fabrics, either in the ugly brown maid kimono Fume made me wear, or the sturdier dark green kimono and hakama I wore as Katsu. Color aside, I could get used to this Princess thing.

Mai came over and made some minute adjustments to the fit, humming happily as she did so.

Damn! I was being a bit absentminded myself. Almost forgot. “Mai, I had a visitation from a ninja in the middle of the night.” I grabbed the message off the writing desk and gave it to her.

“Oh no!” Mai put her hand to her chest. “Did he scare you? I’m sorry. I didn’t even think to warn you about him. He’s a friend, and harmless. Alright. No. He’s not harmless, obviously, but he-”

“Mai! It’s ok. I was startled, that’s all.” And sure, startled enough to come at him with a knife, but she didn’t need to know that. “I’ve been friends with Sasuke for a couple of years. I’m used to his quirks.” Though popping through ceilings like Spiderman was a previously unknown facet of his personality.

She relaxed. “I forgot he’s been here that long.”

Weird response.

Quickly, she skimmed the letter. “He wants a chance to say goodbye in person. Kats- er, Okatsu, do you want to go into town with me? I can show you around, then we can meet up with Sasuke at this bookseller he frequents.”

Ha! I bet I know which bookseller that is. Though I was already familiar with Azuchi, thanks to my ‘observational activities’ earlier this summer, it wouldn’t be the worst idea. “I’d like that, but of course, I need to report in with Mitsuhide first. He might have other plans for me.”

“We can take Mitsunari with us. That way, you can be seen together. And if I mention bookseller, he’ll be happy to go along with it.”

That was actually a pretty good idea...

We tracked down Mitsuhide at Hideyoshi’s manor, where, as it happened, they also thought Mai’s idea was a good one. Mitsuhide gave her an approving nod. “We might make a strategist out of you yet, Mouse.”

“You on the other hand.” Hideyoshi looked me over with a frown. “What were you thinking, sticking a sword into the obi? You’re a princess, not a warrior. Azuchi is safe enough within the confines of the town.”

“I’m used to being armed.” I handed over my sword. It had only been a diversion, as I had my daggers strapped to my legs and a throwing knife hidden under my sleeve.

Mitsuhide studied me. “That… was too easy.” He put out his hand.

I unstrapped one of the daggers and handed that over as well. I could work with one dagger, the throwing knife, and the joy of knowing I had won.

“You can keep the other weapons,” Mitsuhide added, “as long as they stay hidden.”

If Mitsuhide ever ends up in the future, he can rent himself out as a metal detector.

It was easy enough to find Mitsunari, as he was holed up in his quarters, reading. It was slightly more difficult to get his attention, but once Mai executed the ‘bookstore’ command sequence, he was willing enough to set aside his book and join us.

I wasn’t sure whether Hideyoshi had given him an additional lecture, or if Mai was a mitigating presence, or, if Mitsunari was getting used to me – whatever the reason, he was more present and willing to discuss landmarks of interest.

At one point, I paused in front of a metalsmith’s shop – I could use some more arrowheads – both the blunted ones for target practice and the sharper ones for hunting and defense. The sound of the smith at work carried into the street. “Is this where Nobunaga gets his ammunition?”

“Some of it.” Mitsunari led us inside the smith’s shop to examine the wares. “Nobunaga has a private swordsmith he uses for his sword collection, and we have metalsmiths in the castle for ourselves and Nobunaga’s personal guards. As you might imagine, when there is active fighting, we need more than what we make. And of course, our guns come from the Kunitomo village gunsmiths.”

I nodded. Most of the guns made in Japan were made in the Kunitomo village, though I knew there was still a big market for European-made muskets.

The weapons inside the shop were of higher quality than what Aki could acquire. I picked up a fully assembled arrow and examined it. It was slightly longer than what I used, and the feathers were different as well.

“Sea eagle,” the smith replied when I asked.

That made sense. Azuchi was closer to the coast than Akihira’s household.

Mai mimed drawing a bow. “Are you any good at archery?” I already knew enough about Mai to know that she had no interest in weapons of war, but it was nice of her to ask, and she was doing a good job pretending not to be bored.

Was ‘Okatsu’ good at archery? Many women in this era were, as they needed to be able to defend their homes while their husbands were at war. And since legendary female archers such as Tomoe Gozen were part of literature, I figured it would be acceptable for “Okatsu” to have this skill. “As long as I practice, yes.”

She twirled an arrow around her fingers like it was a baton, and I could see the smith wince in the background. “Ieyasu’s teaching me.”

“Willingly?” The question came out before I had a chance to edit my words. Eep. I’m usually better tha that, “Er, I mean, how did that come about?”

Mai simply laughed. “It was after a strong suggestion from Hideyoshi. Anyway, you should join us in the mornings if you want to keep your skills up.”

I nodded. I would do that. Belatedly recalling that I was supposed to be developing a rapport with Mitsunari, I asked him if he too practiced.

His response was to proclaim proudly, “Ieyasu is the best archer in Azuchi.”

That… was not the question I had asked, so I tried again. “Do you ever practice with him?”

“Oh. Yes. Sometimes. Ieyasu says he prefers the solitude of archery, but he kindly allows me to join him.” There was that beatific smile again. Maybe his first love was books, but it seemed like his friends could inspire that smile as well.

Deciding that it would be a good test of my skills to practice with the longer arrows, I purchased some, as well as some blunted arrowheads. Mitsunari bought a couple too, saying that he would have Ieyasu practice with them as a way of testing the vendor. Happy with our purchases, we continued toward the booksellers.

“Do you expect to need additional vendors?” It was mostly a small talk gambit. Nobunaga was not currently at war with anyone, but it would be good to know if that was on the verge of changing.

“No immediate expectation, although as Lord Nobunaga continues to push the country toward unification under his banner, there will naturally be more resistance.” Mitsunari turned to look at me, and immediately tripped over air, and stumbled a few steps before regaining his balance. Unfazed, he continued speaking. “In any case, if we waited until there was a need, it would be too late.”

“Good point. Also, always a good idea to create goodwill with your local merchants.” I knew that both local and international trade was important to Nobunaga, and it seemed he was doing as much as he could for the merchant class.

Mai appeared to be a favorite with the merchants as well and pointed out a large stall belonging to a fabric deal. The merchant smiled and waved at her. “We’ll stop in in a bit,” she called to him. She turned to me. “I want to pick out some fabrics for your wedding.”

Alright, enough about that, even from Mai. This was an over the top, just to fool one seventeen year old girl. “Have you met the Kanamori princess? Does Mitsunari really pose that much of a threat to her engagement?” I couldn’t imagine any woman of this time being that willing to act counter to her family’s wishes.

“I don’t know her personally, but as for your other question… well, it’s easier if I show you.” Suddenly she raised her voice. “Misunari! Thank you for coming shopping with us!”

Even before she had finished speaking, women popped up all over the outdoor market, looking a bit like prairie dogs scenting food. Or well… something like that.

“Misunari?”

“Mitsunari’s here?”

“Where? Where is that angel?”

In moments, Mitsunari was surrounded, while Mai and I were pushed back by the tide.

I see.

Or, well, currently I could not see, but I understood.

When my ears adjusted to the pandemonium, I heard several of them invite him to tea, and a fight almost broke out. “Ok. Needs a bodyguard. Got it.”

“Okatsu. He probably needs one right this moment.” At least two of the women had their grips on his arms and Mitsunari looked from one woman to the next, trying to follow six conversations at once. “He might accidentally promise himself to a second, third and fourth wife.”

I gritted my teeth and waded in. Yeesh. I’d been to K-pop concerts that had less of a scrum. “There you are, darling.” I tucked my arm in his, carefully dislodging one of the women in the process.

“Ladies.” Mai scooted in behind me. “This is Princess Okatsu. Mitsunari’s fiancée.”

If glares were arrows, I would have had more holes in me than a pincushion.

Now I was the one who needed a bodyguard.

By the time we had made our escape to the booksellers, Sasuke was already inside, leafing through a book that appeared to be a translation of Greek mathematics. Takauji (the latest of Aki’s messengers to be stuck wearing the dreaded wig and beard bookseller disguise), called out an automatic welcome when we entered. He seemed dismayed to see Mitsunari, then surprised that I was with him. But he didn’t break character, at least.

Once Mitsunari was camped out with a book and Mai was chatting with Sasuke, I made my way over to Takauji. “Do you have any poetry?” In truth, I have no strong feelings about poetry, but I knew the few volumes Aki had were kept on the other side of the shop, so Takauji and I could talk undisturbed.

“Kaya, what’s going on? Did Aki send you to check in with me?” He handed me a slim scroll.

“Not exactly. One of Aki’s most frequent contacts asked us for help with a specific task. I’m based in the castle for a couple of weeks.” I unrolled the scroll – poetry illustrated with pen and ink sketches – and pretended it was fascinating. “He didn’t have any message to you.”

“I haven’t heard from him in a while.” Taka handed me a book to leaf through. “I was really hoping you were my replacement. I’m getting a skin rash from the damn beard.”

I shrugged because what could I say? Every one of Aki’s couriers knew the beard itched. “I told you to bring rash cream. Anyway. You know Aki. He’ll be in touch when he wants something. Meanwhile, since you’ve been here all summer, is there anything going on that I need to know?”

He scratched around to corner of the beard. Oh yeah, I could see the top of the rash. Poor guy. “Nothing big since the conflict with Uesugi earlier this summer. There’s been a gang of sailors causing trouble for the smaller shopkeepers around here. They don’t really bother with me, but I know the restaurant owners are upset.”

Sailors? I perked up a bit at that. Of course, my brother would not likely be in a gang that caused trouble, but if a new ship had docked in Osaka, then it might be worth seeing if I could finagle a trip down there to check things out.

“Really the most trouble I’ve had these days, comes from him.” With a jerk of his head, Taka indicated where Mitsunari had made himself comfortable with a book. “He always makes a mess.”

Sure enough, Mitsunari was leaning against a table, and the stack of books above was swaying dangerously. “Watch it,” I said to Takauji, mostly to clock his reaction. “That’s my fiancé you’re talking about.”

Then I zipped over to Mitsunari to rescue him before he concussed himself.

As I restacked the books in such a way that they would be less likely to fall over, Mitsunari finished scanning the book he had in his hand. He gave me an odd look, as if he had forgotten who I was. Hm. I hadn’t thought he was that absentminded.

Mai completed her goodbye to Sasuke, who had given me another farewell wave before vanishing into the throng of people on the streets. Then, donning her authority as Azuchi chatelaine, she insisted Mitsunari pay for the book in his hands, and successfully herded us out of the booksellers and right into a fabric dealer.

It felt weird to be picking out kimono fabric for a wedding that wasn’t going to happen, although I’d likely get a lot of use out of the rest of the wardrobe once we got to Genba.

Mai held a swatch of something pink up to my face. “I don’t know why you have such a problem with this color. It will look good on you.”

Well, I didn’t know why some people were so fond of pink in the first place. My mother had always wanted me dressed in pi… well. Some people liked pink. I was not one of the people. But Mai was the expert, and I hadn’t the heart to tell her that overall, I didn’t think clothing was all that interesting to begin with, especially when it was clearly her passion. So, I faked enthusiasm for the fabrics she picked out – and really, aside from the dreaded pink, I liked everything else she bought, as she stuck to the blue and aqua shades I preferred. She even bought a coordinating piece of fabric in a deeper shade of teal for Mitsunari, so that we would have matching outfits for our first night in Genba.

Mai… it’s not prom.

After that, she declared herself hungry – actually, Mai has quite the bossy streak - so we headed for a restaurant nearby that she said was good.

For the record, I maintain that what happened next wasn’t completely my fault.

After we ordered our food, my attention was caught by a group of sailors on the other side of the restaurant. Hard not to notice them – they were loud. Would these men, possibly, hopefully have an idea where Toshiie might be? Couldn’t hurt to ask. Before Mai and Mitsunari could stop me, I grabbed the portrait and scooted over to the table with the rowdy sailors.

Normally, such discussions followed the same pattern. I would introduce myself to the sailors, establish a rapport, show them the drawing of Toshiie, they would shake their head, I would thank them, and then be on my way.

That’s what normally happened… when I was dressed as Katsu.

But dressed as “Okatsu,” I attracted the wrong sort of attention. “Pardon me. Have any of you seen this man?” I held the drawing out to the table at large.

Instead of taking any time to look at the drawing, one of the sailors grabbed my arm. “If ya want a man, wench, there’s a whole table of ‘em right here.” He pulled me onto his lap.

Hell to the no on that, dude… I jammed my dagger into his forearm.

“Fucking bitch!” He leaped to his feet and had his sword out instantly.

Damn Hideyoshi for confiscating my own sword.

I deflected the initial cut with my dagger, but he immediately tried to catch me with the backswing. When I leaped backward to avoid getting hit, Mai’s too-long skirt tripped me up and I stumbled into another of the sailors, thwacking him across the arm with my dagger.

In an instant, the entire table of sailors had their swords out.

The first sailor came at me again, but at the last moment, another party came to my rescue, deflecting the strike with a gleaming katana - Mitsunari had leaped in to protect me. Yikes, please don’t get stabbed, Mitsunari! He slung me out of the way, back toward Mai, and I lost track of him almost immediately when the entire restaurant erupted into fighting.

A dagger wasn’t going to be the most useful weapon, but I couldn’t leave Mitsunari unprotected. Arms and legs flying, I jumped back into the fray, and immediately got jabbed in the eye by someone’s elbow. I heard a rip, then realized, I had again ruined another one of Mai’s kimonos. Shit. She was going to hate me.

I glanced back toward her, just in time to see her clonk a sailor over the head with a tea kettle.

A sword clattered on the floor and landed at my feet – Mitsunari had disarmed his first opponent.

Well, I wasn’t going to look a gift sword in the mouth. I grabbed it off the floor and was back in the middle of the melee.

The sailors weren’t unskilled, and their weapons were of surprisingly good quality, but some of them were pretty drunk. Of course, with the entire restaurant now involved in what had become a sword and food fight, it was becoming difficult to tell the enemies from the friends.

And so, after I kicked a sailor in the stomach, when I sensed a presence right behind me, I grabbed a plate of food off the table and flung it…

…at Hideyoshi.

Well, it isn’t really a good fight until someone gets whacked in the face with a dish of stewed eel.

@lorei-writes @bestbryn @katriniac @lyds323 @briars7

[haunteddaycare]

Trainer: [Renounced]

Species: Gastly

Name: Ollie

Gender: Female

Moveset:  Lick, Confuse Ray

Ability: Levitate

Nature and Characteristic: Relaxed and Thoroughly cunning

Trainer: [Renounced]

Species: Haunter

Name: Smog

Gender: Female

Moveset:  Hypnosis, Shadow Punch, Icy Wind and Facade

Ability: Levitate

Nature and Characteristic: Docile and highly persistent

Trainer: [Renounced]

Species: Gengar 

Name: Cream

Gender: Male

Moveset:  Shadow Ball, Acid Spray, Endure, Sunny Day

Ability: Cursed Body

Nature and Characteristic: Quiet and mischievous

Trainer: [Renounced]

Species: Gengar

Name: Cheese

Gender: Male

Moveset: Perish Song, Reflect Type, Spite and Sucker Punch

Ability: Cursed Body

Nature and Characteristic: Timid and alert to sounds

Trainer: [Renounced]

Species: Banette

Name: Lucky

Gender: Male

Moveset:  Screech, Knock Off, Will-O-Wisp and Pounce

Ability: Frisk

Nature and Characteristic: Lonely and likes to thrash about

Trainer: [Renounced]

Species: Frillish

Name: Flan

Gender: Female

Moveset:  Absorb, Poison Sting, Water Pulse and Rain Dance

Ability: Damp

Nature and Characteristic: Quirky and very finicky

Trainer: [Renounced]

Species: Yamask

Name: Dilly-Dolly (D-Doll)

Gender: Female

Moveset:  Protect, Haze, Disable and Crafty Shield

Ability: Mummy

Nature and Characteristic: Adamant and scatters things often

Trainer: [Renounced]

Species: Cursola

Name: Bubble bee

Gender: Female

Moveset: Astonish, Ancient Power, Screech and Dig

Ability: Weak Armor

Nature and Characteristic: Docile and somewhat vain

Trainer: [Renounced]

Species: Greavard

Name: Bingo

Gender: Male

Moveset: Tackle, Lick, Tail Whip and Bite

Ability: Fluffy

Nature and Characteristic: Naive and proud of its power

Trainer: [Renounced]

Species: Mimikyu

Name: Unity

Gender: Female

Moveset: Wood Hammer, Baby-Doll Eyes, Shadow Sneak, and Double Team

Ability: Disguise

Nature and Characteristic: Naughty and good perseverance

Trainer: [Renounced]

Species: Cofagrigus 

Name: Coffee

Gender: Male

Moveset: Shadow Claw, Night Shade, Revenge and Round

Ability: Mummy

Nature and Characteristic: Rash and a little quick tempered

Trainer: [Renounced]

Species: Gimmighoul (Chest Form)

Name:  Heads

Gender: Female

Moveset: Astonish, Tackle and Confuse Ray

Ability: Rattled

Nature and Characteristic: Hasty and hates to lose

Trainer: [Renounced]

Species: Gimmighoul (Roaming Form)

Name: Tails

Gender: Male

Moveset:  Astonish, Tackle and Night Shade

Ability: Run Away

Nature and Characteristic: Impish and likes to run

Trainer: [Renounced]

Species: Phantump

Name: Bloomington

Gender: Male

Moveset: Astonish, Tackle and Branch Poke

Ability: Natural Cure

Nature and Characteristic: Jolly and likes to relax

Trainer: [Renounced]

Species: Lampent

Name: Glow

Gender: Female

Moveset: Smog, Minimize, Fire Spin and Inferno

Ability: Infiltrator

Nature and Characteristic: Serious and sturdy body

Trainer: [Renounced]

Species: Drifloon

Name: Flow

Gender: Male

Moveset: Gust, Focus Energy, Swift and Hex

Ability: Unburden

Nature and Characteristic: Brave and strongly defiant

Trainer: [Renounced]

Species: Sableye 

Name: Sapphire

Gender: Female

Moveset: Scratch, Fake Out, Detect and Astonish

Ability: Stall

Nature and Characteristic: Bashful and highly curious

Trainer: [Renounced]

Species: Pumpkaboo (Average size)

Name: Pumpkin

Gender: Female

Moveset: Trick-or-Treat, Razor Leaf, Leech Seed and Scary Face

Ability: Pickup

Nature and Characteristic: Hardy and quick tempered

[pandoramusicbox]

I know I have posted this on other platforms, but perhaps not here.

Here is the information on the Angelics

Very specifically the stone tree Angelics

Also known as the A-holes. There’s actually a rather wide range of Angelics. They can fly so they get around.

Ok ok, the stone tree Angelics are not that bad, though I do have a bingo card for them filled out.

They are isolationist who live in the stone trees, they believe in purity and have rather rigged gender and social roles. Their society is one based around the idea of moral and physical perfection. With the greatest purpose of life is to strive to be a master of yourself and your world. A bit like the stoicism of Rome married to the renaissance man.

They are well known for their excellent metallurgy. Crafting gorgeous jewelry, silverware, cookery, armor and weapons that are delicate and durable. They weave clothing too. It’s called feather weaving and is often traded to the neptonians of the neptonian empire. Traditionally the cloth is woven from material gathered from a Cotten like flower that grows on the slopes of the stone trees, or the striped bark of the wind willow that also grows in the stone trees. Nowadays the angelics trade for a wide variety of threads and dyes. These weavings often tell a story of sorts, though reading these woven stories are an art form of its own.

Thier language is read on a similar way, though is written out on long scrolls, once made from cloth but nowadays made from paper. Read from left to right it’s taught to all their children, poetry is very valuable and taught as well. Their poetry is so complex that it is often used in torshii to communicate secret messages

Another reason poetry is valued is because it’s part of the traditional flirting rituals. Along with song. Someone good at singing is considered very attractive.

Gender role wise ( let’s see if I can remember off the top of my head)

-males: leaders, head of the family, hunters and warriors, cooks, law makers.

-females: architects, archers, archives, cleaners, scholars, prepers, councilors.

- both: weavers, child rearing, metallurgy, scribes, magician.

If I where to describe the architecture of the stone tree Angelics I would call it a strange mixture of perpendicular gothic, saint basils cathedral in Moscow. Moorish architecture in Spain and last but not least Native American pueblos.

They are also related to harpies, grip, and griffons.

This page also has some general information on their biology. Things like that they have waterproof feathers, their bones are hollow, they have two lines of eyelashes. Though this is true of all thier cousins species as well.

Though thier ears are quite neat, they are able to fold up like a morning glory or seashell when flying, it keeps thier hearing i tacked and prevents frostbite/ wind burn as they tuck the ears into thier hair.

Their toes are longer than those of humans and able to grasp things. They have feathers covering their shoulders and back and their hair is actually feathers, though of a very downy sort. They grow feathers all along their back, under their arms, and sometimes along their necks. In winter it tends to grow all along the arms and the upper legs.

Among the stone tree Angelics they tend to pluck the feathers that grow everywhere that isn’t the wings and head. They also crop off the small tails that Angelics are naturally born with. Though they are not the only Angelics that do this.

Their eyesight is also interesting as they have a sort of tinted vision where the top portion of their vision is tinted a yellowish hue. And acts as sunglasses preventing glare. So things get dark if they look up but brighter it they look down. This dose also unfortunately mean that they are essentially blind in the night. They do have very sharp vision able to spot small things at great distances and adjust the focus of things in their eyesight. They are also able to see more colors than humans as they have one more cone in their eye for color. They call this color ib and when mixed with red light is called sant.

That bit up top about the angelic being related to the holly is true too. Their closest relatives are harpies, but millenniums ago there was a handful of Hollies and harpies who lived together the magical offspring eventually became the angelic.

The many nobles of the stone tree Angelics often have multiple wings.

[chibifoxwrites]

Saw more posts and wanted to add more and introduce another Netto from a WIP.

Netto had experienced many things in her life, but being stuck in a room with her alternate selves from across the multiverse was something she did not think to Weird Things Bingo Card. The fact that almost all of her alternate selves were male was a jarring fact as well.

At the moment she was sitting between the other female counterpart and the Lan she had met when waking up in the other room, the two younger ones stealing glances at a skeleton propped up in the corner the entire group had taken to calling 'Bernie' in reference to an old movie that seemed to exist in most universes.

At least three of her alternate counterparts were NetNavis if the bright orange armor told her anything, most were human and still in elementary school, and one was an adult. It was a small comfort that she would not have to be the responsible one and could defer to an adult for advice for once given how her life had been nothing but cleaning up the messes of adults for the past 5 years.

They were wrapping up their game of 'getting to know you' with her turn coming up soon. It was a simple game really: pass around the kubotan stick, give a little info about your universe and life, then pass it to the next Netto. Everyone had a Rockman or Megaman as their partner, their parents were universally Yuuichirou and Haruka Hikari, and they fought crime.

The fact that many of them were also involved with Enzan, whether it be friendship or romantic, seemed to be a constant as well. It almost made her laugh that no matter the universe, Hikari Netto was destined to pester Ijuuin Enzan in some form.

The telltale signal bell announcing the arrival of yet another Netto sounded, with everyone turning to a newly appeared door as the kubotan made its way into her hands, the girl next to her having made her introduction.

The new Netto was dressed in a black three quarter sleeve top under a cropped jacket with an asymmetrical orange and cream pattern. He also had black leggings under his shorts, but his were denim while hers were khaki. He had a headband with the Hikari crest on it but the one thing that had her on edge was the new Netto's eyes.

Unlike the other human counterparts, this Netto had green eyes.

The new Netto smiled and lazily waved a hand, which had a slightly faded tattoo of the Maverick Hunters on it. He locked eyes with her.

"I take it that you've got an X at home too? You've got that look about you."

Taking a deep breath, Netto took the kubotan stick as the new one sat in the circle, ready to introduce herself and open yet another can of worms concerning the multiverse.

@dunedragon Ask and ye shall receive!

Two children stood in a white room, one with arms crossed across her chest and an eyebrow cocked in mild interest while the other was playing with the hem of his hoodie.

The girl was wearing a cropped blue jacket over a black top with leggings under a pair of shorts, an orange symbol outlined in gold prominent on the left side of her jacket.

The boy was wearing a large orange hoodie that seemed to swallow him whole and almost covered his shorts while a bright blue headband with a matching symbol was snuggly tied around his head.

Regardless of where they came from, both were part of the Hikari family.

"So," the girl started. "I'm guessing your name is Netto too? How did you get here?"

The boy flinched before answering. "Actually, my name is Lan and I honestly don't know how I got here. I remember going to bed and hearing a voice talking about the likes meeting one another. When I looked around, I couldn't find MegaMan and only saw this giant robot looking thing. Then, I was here!"

Netto nodded slowly, lips twisted in a grimace. "One, it's good to know that you have some form of RockMan in your world from what it sounds like. Two, I think were were brought here by Duo."

"Who or what is Duo?"

"He's a NetNavi from the edge of the universe and operates purely on logic as he judges other beings from their planets, decides whether the species or race is good or evil, and then destroys the planet if he deems it evil," Netto explained, much to her counterpart's horror. "He dropped by my planet some years back to judge it, but the test was rigged by his companion, Slur. A bunch of criminal NetNavis were resurrected and mostly given to people who had less than good intentions. A few people were innocent, but a majority of them were career criminals. Long story short, my friends and I beat the bad guys, exposed and deleted Slur, and sent Duo on his merry way among other things."

Lan decided not to ask about the last bit of the sentence that his counterpart muttered under her breath.

"Well, you sound like you've been doing some cool stuff for a while. I just got my NetNavi. Dad gave him to me as a gift when we moved back to DenTech City," the boy explained.

Netto blinked at her counterpart in confusion. "You moved back to Densan?"

"DenTech City, but yeah! Before that we were living in Cyber City! I lived in DenTech when I was younger but we had to move for Dad's job. He then got transferred back to Sci-Labs Headquarters after the mayor was arrested." Lan then shrugged. "Turns out the mayor made it so Dad would transfer and slowly tried to get him to unearth some powerful programs that had been hidden away a long time ago."

Netto sighed. "Our family can never have a moment of peace, at least that is universal."

"Um, just how bad is it? I mean in your world?" Lan asked. "I just started a new school and MegaMan keeps trying to drag me into situations, like trying to make new friends not like I had many in the first place back in Cyber City, but what about you?"

"I'm basically part of a super sentai group that goes around the world and stops cyber crime. People keep thinking that just because they're smarter than the average human that they have the right to steal the hard work from other people to rule over everyone on the planet, so we have to kick ass and take names. I've lost friends in the line of duty and I've been betrayed by them too, but a majority of my team are still friends with me and with each other. We have goot times and we have bad times, but at least I have RockMan and the rest of the family beside me." Netto went quiet for a bit and blushed. "Also, I have my boyfriend so that helps too..."

Lan smiled and softly clapped his hands together. "Hooray for you!"

Netto smiled when something caught her eye. "Has that door always been there?"

Lan turned around and jumped back. "No, no it was not."

"...We're gonna have to go open it to find out where we are, aren't we?"

Lan sighed and took off his backpack before rummaging around in it. A few seconds later, he pulled out a kabuton stick. "I have other things if you need one."

Netto smiled. "Oh, I think we're going to get along just great."

[nonbinarykanan]

I’ve been reading up on GOTG and Gamora’s old outfit was driving me nuts, so I decided to bingo it... uh, do I win?

(For the record I know this isn’t technically armor but like. She wears this into battle? Please put something on? Also it only got out of a few of these squares specifically because it wasn’t traditional armor, so.)

[d-calavera-monster]

Just a golden demon using every RPG female armor

[bikiniarmorbattledamage]

Granblue Fantasy, "Woke" International Standards and pandering to toxic trash gamers

So, I'm not going to name him because I don't particularly want his fans finding it via searches and sending me weird nonsense to my inbox, and honestly I don't want people who don't know him receiving psychic damage due to exposure to his opinions - but a certain streaming personality whose primary contribution is toxicity is getting angry that various mega-corporations that happen to originate in East Asia are continuing to focus on marketing broadly to get the most sales, rather than just pandering to miserable straight white men who are scared of anyone different to them.

Basically the same people who used to scream "Sex sells! Deal with it! Facts don't care about your feelings!" are now having breakdowns when it turns out massive mega-corporations don't want to be their friend/nanny/punching-bag, they want to make as much money as possible and the obvious way to achieve that is to broaden their audience, to make more people interested in buying their game.

Because the $100 from a personal with a marginalized identity who joins the series midway, spends exactly as well as the $100 for the cishet white guy who then goes on to start a harassment campaign against a developer via his social media clout, and uses the proceeds to buy Hot Pockets and bootleg NSFW merchandise (I assume).

Granblue Fantasy is a game series which has... largely resisted this trend. It's been releasing games, etc for ten years so, so many depictions of the player characters could be used as an illustration of our double standards tag.

(Also the male protagonist, Gran, is the one the series is named for when translated into English... there is no Djeetablue Fantasy - despite the many attempts by the fanbase to use memes to manifest it. However her name is incorporated into the native Japanese title... nobody tell him in case he decides that's "woke".)

So this guy who screams about studios who go woke, and was 100% going to play the latest entry in it... he'd support it right?

Nah, he complained he didn't like the story, he didn't get it and posted videos of him doing his signature "this is so bad" face. Man who lives off Hot Pockets and has unreasonable expectations of everyone else, failed to have his expectations met.

It's probably good he bailed out there before he found out that Granblue Fantasy, and a lot of game series like it - often have a lot of female fans who are in it for the story, the characters, the cute boys and the generally fun of the world.... all the stuff he hates.

If you doubt this, there's a foolproof way to check....

Oh wow I wonder why more and more studios are deciding it's a bad idea to court the attention of guys like him.

-wincenworks

[aptericia]

Bingos for @seven-rats-in-trenchcoat!

Gremory didn’t actually score too badly, on account of it not really being armor (confession: I actually like the Gremory outfit, but it’s very impractical and should be worn to a fancy party, NOT the battlefield)

That’s an awful lot of squares, Byleth. And I’m being generous deciding that booty shorts and tights together count as pants. No bingo though…

[thefourthnorn]

Me: *is sooo? Gay? For ladies in practical armor?*

[the-hittite]

Just so we’re clear, Chandra, Torch of Defiance wears the most practical version of her armor to date. (The least practical goes to the manga adaptation of The Purifying Fire.) But compared to the armor designs worn by other residents of Kaladesh, it seems a little out of place.

[chaosaccountant]

I don't think you quite got the bingo...

SUSAN OPINIONS! Wait, does she even play games???

[jessybarnes]

Thunderstruck

Title: Thunderstruck

Pairing: Ragnarok!Thor x F!Reader

Rating: 18+ Only

Written For:  @ultimatechrisbingo and @kinktober2022

Square(s) Filled: N3 -Free Space for Ultimate Chris Bingo // Electrostimulation for Kinktober 2022

Tags: SMUT, slight angst, fluff, electrostimulation, unprotected sex, pet names, masturbation, fingering (female receiving), possessive Thor, explicit sexual content, explicit language, and I think that’s it. 

Word Count: 1,721

Dedicated To: My sister, @brandyywar because she loves Thor ;)

Beta(s): T. Thompson and A. DiLorenza

"Oh, fuck! Th-Thor! Shit, baby… oh, right there!" 

You pump your fingers in and out of your soaked cunt as you think of your boyfriend. His big hand smoothing slowly down your soft skin, those long, thick, nimble fingers deep inside of you as the calloused pad of his thumb circles your clit. God, you just can't get enough of him. 

He has some things to take care of on Asgard, and won't be back for a few hours. You know his rules. You know you aren't allowed to touch yourself while he's gone, but you can't help it. Not when he'd left you mid-makeout session to tend to an apparent emergency. 

Being caught fucking yourself like this would definitely earn you a spot over his knee, but making yourself cum? Now that… that was a big rule. Thor is a greedy man when it comes to your body, and he's made himself very clear that he wants to be the only one to bring you over the edge. 

He's only been gone for an hour though, so you should have more than enough time to finish and clean up before he gets home. You're right there …so close you can taste it, and with one last touch to your hard clit the familiar feeling of bliss crashes over you like a wave. The much-needed orgasm continues to tear through your body, your little whimpers and heavy breathing muffling the noise of your bedroom door opening. The sudden sound of Thor clearing his throat makes your eyes snap open. 

"And just what do we have here, hm?" 

You scramble to cover your naked body and scoot back to rest against the headboard. "I… I-I… that um… that didn't t-take very long…everything okay on Asgard?" 

He slams the door so hard that the pictures on the adjacent wall clatter to the floor. "Don't divert the conversation, Y/N! I asked you a question, and I expect an answer. Now!" 

Your lip quivers and tears sting your eyes as he strides toward you. Tiny bolts of lightning arc across his bare arms, his eyes absolutely seething with rage. 

"I SAID ANSWER ME!" 

"Your eyes go wide, "I-I-I… You left in the middle of kissing me, a-and I...I...needed you so bad… I-I'm sorry, baby. Please… please don't be mad. I wish it was you who um...who made me c-cum… but you can do that now… will you make me cum? Please, Thor?" 

He narrows his eyes and wraps one of his large hands around your throat, "oh, my Queen thinks she can just take what's mine and get rewarded? That's not how this works, darling. I am the only one who makes you cum. Need I remind you what the rules are, Y/N?" 

You whimper, "n-no...I know the rules…" 

He chuckles dryly and curls his lip up into a snarl. "I don't think you do, sweetheart. I think," he rips the covers off of you and lets his eyes gaze over your bare form, "you need me to show you who's really the one in charge here." 

Your breath catches in your throat as you look up at him, his gaze filled with authority, 

"Thor...please…I-" 

He cuts you off, his mouth slamming onto yours in a bruising kiss. It's filthy, all tongue and teeth as he grabs your wrists with one hand. "You're not in any position to be asking for anything, naughty girl. Now, lay still for me. Don't move, understand?" 

You swallow hard, the sheets becoming wet with how turned on you are. "Yes, my King." 

Thor groans, "fuck I love it when you call me that, darling." 

He takes his time removing his armor and clothes, admiring how you look at him with unrestrained want. He joins you on the bed and flips you over onto your stomach in one smooth motion making you squeal. 

"Come up on your knees, Y/N. Spread them wide for me, baby. Present yourself to me. Show your King what belongs to him, and only to him." 

You moan sinfully and raise your hips so you're positioned just as he asked. His hands glide down your back making your skin tingle. 

"Mmm, look at you, darling. You look so pretty for me like this." He grabs the swell of your ass, his rough hand spreading you wider for him. "I can see how wet you are, Y/N. It's a shame I won't get to see you cum." 

You whine and hang your head, trying not to cry. "Oh, god… baby please let me. I'm sorry I disobeyed you." 

He chuckles and swats your ass cheek making you gasp. "I don't think you've earned it, my love. And may I mention that you already did earlier?" 

Thor barely grazes your clit with his fingers, a small jolt of electricity sparking from the calloused pads. 

"OH, F-FUCK! Thor!" 

He leans over you, his lips brushing the shell of your ear, "mmm, you like that, baby? I knew there was another reason you agreed to share my throne, and I think I've found it." 

Your arousal drips onto the bed sheets as you breathe wetly into the pillow. "M-More...oh, please let me have more…" 

Thor trails soft kisses down your spine, "are you asking me to shock you again, Y/N?" 

You whimper and push back into him to try and get any sort of friction to your throbbing core. 

"Yes! Oh, fuck yes!" 

He growls and glides the fingers on his left hand through your folds, sliding two inside you with ease. "Oh, darling…you really do want it, don't you? Your pussy's so tight around me." Thor slowly pumps them in and out, savoring your wanton moans. "I'll go easy, my love. The lightning inside of me isn't like the kind in storm clouds. It's more powerful and I don't want to overwhelm you." 

Thor's right hand rests on your lower back, massaging the skin. Every so often he shoots little sparks from his fingertips, and each time they connect with your body you clench around him. 

"Please! Baby! I-I… - oh, fuck! -" 

His head dips down and he brushes his lips against the back of your thigh. "Shh, be patient, Y/N," he admonished. "You know I always take good care of you, love." 

He quickens his pace and curls them, the tips of his fingers finding your spot with ease. 

"Oh, my god! Please! Please don't stop, baby! Wanna - ah, r-right there! - wanna cum for you!" 

Thor moves his right hand so it rests on your left hip. His thumb smoothes over your skin, getting closer and closer to your clit. He begins to rub it making you arch your back. 

"Oh, please! Please, I'm so close! Thor!" 

He spanks you again, the sting of the impact making your walls flutter. "You ready, sweetheart? Ready to cum for your King?" 

Your panting, hands fisting the sheets as you moan desperately. "So close! G-Gonna...oh, my fucking… I-I'm gonna…" 

Thor holds your side tight with the fingers on his right hand, while the left ones continue thrusting in and out of you impossibly fast. "Show me, my Queen." Thor shoots a small bolt of lightning from his thumb, the other end of it connecting to your clit ripping a scream from your throat. "Oh, look at you, love. Fuck… you're absolutely soaking my hand, Y/N… that's it, baby." 

Your whole body thrums with electricity as you collapse onto the mattress, "Thor…want you…C'mere." 

He lays next to you and pulls you flush against his toned, naked body. "What does my love need?" He kisses you sweetly, his cock throbbing against your thigh with interest. 

"You…" 

He turns you on your back and hovers over you, holding himself up with his arms. "Anything for you, my Queen." 

He lines himself up and rolls his hips forward until he's buried inside of you. Both of you moan in ecstasy as you look into each other’s eyes. He leans down to capture your lips in a heated kiss. No matter how many times he makes love to you, you’ll never get used to the way his touch feels. 

He pulls away just enough so you can see his eyes. His pupils are dilated, but they stay that way only for a brief moment. In the next, they’re bright white, and you feel your body come alive with an intense electric current. It’s not painful and even though small bolts continue to arc off of his bronze skin, running your hands over him doesn’t hurt. 

He gives a particularly hard thrust and you throw your head back in ecstasy. “Oh, please! Please give me more, baby! I want you to fill me up, my King.”

Thor growls and lifts one of your legs onto his shoulder while his free hand grabs your breast for leverage. “You’re mine, Y/N. This body belongs to your King and I’m the only one who is allowed to give it this kind of pleasure unless I say otherwise.” 

Your body instinctively arches into his touch as he pistons his hips at a bruising pace. You feel yourself shaking, your pussy quivering as his thick cock fills you over and over deliciously. Both of you chase the high of release, yours coming first and his following not a second later. 

When you open your eyes again you see that he’s back to normal. His bright, blue gaze is the familiar kind and gentle one that you know and love. He brushes your cheek and gives you a soft kiss before rolling onto his side so he can hold you close to him. 

“Promise me that you’ll remember our rules and obey them, darling.”

“I promise, my King.”

His eyes darken with need and he raises an eyebrow. “You better be careful, Y/N… You know what those words do to me when you’re the one saying them.”

“I know,” there’s a hint of brattiness in your tone and you know he picks up on it. “I don’t think I’ve quite learned my lesson, baby.” Your teeth sink gingerly into his bottom lip and he sighs. “What do you think, my King?”

Thor closes his eyes and groans, “I think I need to tell Heimdall to close the Bifrost.”

[bigfan-fanfic]

Temple of Desire - Part 1

Obikin Bingo Event for @obikin-events Prompt: BDSM Club Synopsis: A year or so after becoming a Jedi Knight, Anakin's former Master brings him to a certain establishment on Coruscant for an advanced form of training.

Author's Note: Basically, felt like a bunch of the prompts could fit the idea of Obi-Wan being involved in Anakin undergoing a Jedi-Order-approved pleasure-fest with lots of kinkiness. This is mainly setup but I had fun writing it. More to come!

Anakin twitches a little, having become unaccustomed to tight clothing after spending so long in combat fatigues and armor or the flowing robes and tunics of the Jedi. Not helping this fact is the sight of Obi-Wan dressed similarly, his body clad not in robes or in armor, but in tight fabric. Black leggings similar to the kind the Clone Troopers would wear beneath their armor, his arms on display due to the sleeveless rust-and-gold vest he wore, a metallic armlet circling his bicep, his chest obscured by the sheerest of fabric, diaphanous and rippling in the slight breeze. His boots seemed high, impractically so, stretching all the way up to his thighs as opposed to somewhere more practical. Anakin himself is dressed similarly, though less bold, his torso covered in form-fitting navy, his hands in gloves, and his boots at a far more comfortable length. After years of Jedi robes and tunics, however, Anakin feels almost uncomfortably exposed.

"Calm yourself, Anakin." Obi-Wan murmurs, slowing his pace to fall into step with his former Apprentice.

"I don't know how you can be so calm when everyone on this lane can see your entire chest." Anakin snaps, but breathes slowly before giving a contrite look at the raised eyebrow Obi-Wan flashes him. "Sorry, Master. I just - I thought you said that we were going for training?"

"That we are." Obi-Wan gives him a cryptic smirk. "And yet, this training shall require subtlety. Consider this a final chance for a Master to impart teachings to his Apprentice."

Anakin chuckles at that and allows Obi-Wan to lead him onward, until they turn onto a discreet avenue off of this main promenade. Much of Coruscant's city is lit in garish neon, but here, at a point between a rich district and a merchant quarter, the building, on its own plaza, seems nearly austere.

Sturdy columns, almost like one of the Senate buildings, and false firelight shining along the pathway to the entrance, Anakin is reminded almost of a miniaturized Jedi Temple, though with what Anakin could only consider Naboo architecture. With mounting confusion, Anakin enters behind Obi-Wan, taking in the way his Master gave a familiar nod to one of the two silent armored guards standing vigil at the door.

Though the Jedi take solace in their philosophy, the idea that by expecting all, they may be prepared for all, Anakin could not have controlled the surprise and shock coming off him in waves at the sight and sounds that awaited him.

Amid the whirl, Anakin's eyes fall on a smiling Zabrak male. He kneels, on a small padded cushion, completely naked, his lean body glistening with sweat. His hair, long and loose, is fanned out over his shoulders. He is bent forward, his head resting on the thigh of a Zeltron dressed in flowing white robes, who smiles beatifically at him as he strokes the Zabrak's horns. It takes a moment for Anakin to realize the Zabrak is bound, hand and foot, white rope shining over glistening skin the color of vermillion.

On a stage at the far end of the room, a crowd gathers to watch a pair of scenes. On one side of the stage stands a trio of Twi'leks, their bodies decorated in paint and artfully dressed in thin strips of leather. The male flexes and twists, allowing the crowd to cheer and ogle, before he steps back and the two females take control, frogmarching him over and bending him forward over a strange device that they efficiently manacle him to. The yellow female presses a thick bit between the male's teeth, buckling the thing behind his head, while the green one plays to the crowd, lifting a thin, flexible rod and twirling it with her fingers. Anakin lurches as he watches the green female raise the rod and deftly flick it through the air, making a crisp whistle before making contact with the male's rear, his head lifting as he moans into the gag. The crowd cheers. On the other end, a shirtless Nautolan male seems to be lecturing as he binds the hands of a human male with soft rope, teaching the small group watching him.

"Wh-what is this-?" Anakin tries weakly, but Obi-Wan's attention is diverted when a cry of "Ben!" reaches their ears.

Anakin is even further at a loss when he watches a human man in a shimmering silver tunic that reminded him of typical Jedi attire, with long black hair woven with colorful stones, kiss Obi-Wan full on the lips and hug him close, and Obi-Wan smile in return. "You sly demon, Ben, I haven't seen you for ages and ages!"

Anakin sees the man has no intention of moving away from Obi-Wan, and Obi-Wan has his arm draped loosely around the man's waist. "Er..."

"Master Tavo, may I introduce my dear friend?"

Tavo gives Anakin a bright smile as Anakin opens his mouth to speak. "No need for names yet, friend. Come with me."

"What- what is this place? And who is he?" Anakin practically hisses to Obi-Wan, who chuckles.

"Patience, patience." is all he gets from his old Master.

They walk through a maze of private hallways until the noises of the crowd fade away, and Tavo leads them both into a spacious room dominated by a bed, but with a small sitting area. It reminds Anakin almost of a Senatorial suite, though of course far smaller. Tavo sits in one of the plush chairs and puts on a mock-disapproving glare. "Ages, Obi-Wan Kenobi. This is intolerable."

"My most sincere apologies." Obi-Wan replies easily, flashing Tavo a grin and sitting opposite him. He bids Anakin sit and chuckles. "What do you think of him?"

"Handsome indeed. Though nigh-unrecognizable from the war holovids." Tavo winks, which just throws Anakin further off guard.

Obi-Wan finally takes pity on him. "Welcome, Anakin, to Atavi, one of the most exclusive establishments on Coruscant. Indeed, perhaps, the whole Inner Rim."

Anakin narrows his eyes. "What is this place?"

Tavo's smile remains, though his eyes flash to something far more businesslike. "It is a club for exploration of the sensual."

"A brothel." Anakin scoffs.

"No." Tavo says instantly. "We do not deal in flesh here. Should any sex occur here, it is agreed upon by both parties. We teach. We demonstrate. We facilitate. And should a member of staff be willing, they may join. But we do not sell ourselves."

"I'm... unsure." Anakin admits.

Tavo nods, then flashes Obi-Wan a much harder glare. "Did you not teach him the rules?"

Obi-Wan has the grace to look (slightly) abashed. He turns to Anakin. "The Council has long had a quiet tradition, that they have recently considered reinstating. The Jedi Code forbids attachment, and yet there is the question of the needs of the body. Master Ki-Adi-Mundi himself has the allowance to marry and procreate for his species' survival. A similar question has arisen, that our apprentices may find it difficult to conquer temptation if never exposed to it."

Tavo rolls his eyes. "And so, when a Padawan or Knight reaches their species' age of mental and physical maturity, they will be brought here and offered the experience of physical pleasure, so that they may learn the difference between desire and attachment."

Anakin stammers a little, but Tavo continues. "Though many Masters have chosen to lead celibate lives, the Code forbids attachment, not sex. Even in ancient times, I do not believe the Jedi of old precluded themselves from pleasure."

"Should you consent, Anakin, Master Tavo shall assist you in experiencing pleasure, and I, as your former Master, shall be here to ease you and guide you if necessary."

"D-did you undergo this... training, Master?" Anakin asks skeptically.

Obi-Wan places a hand on Anakin's upper arm, and for a moment an image blooms in Anakin's vision of his Master, younger, beardless, lithe and flush with youth, gasping in ecstasy, a firm hand loosely gripping his throat and another rolling one of his nipples between two fingers. Obi-Wan arches, sweat flicking from his brow as the hand at his nipple follows the curve of his flesh down between his legs -

"I'll do it."

Tavo smiles, and stands. Obi-Wan gives an anticipatory chuckle. "Then by all means, Anakin, disrobe."