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jimlingss · 4 years ago

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hi Kina! may I make a request for a sort of sci-fi au? yn dies but when she opens her eyes, some unfamiliar yet familiar dude takes off his vr goggles and goes “hEy hOw wAs iT?” maybe Joon? or JK? I don’t really mind

↳ Awaken Again

2k || 50% Fluff, 50% Angst || Kim Namjoon

You die with some regrets.

But mostly without. It was a rather unremarkable, mundane life but a happy one where you feel general satisfaction for the choices and decisions you made. Above all, you feel tired. Oh so tired. You’re ready to sleep for a long while. Perhaps forever.

So you surrender to the darkness. Not sure what’s next.

……………………

Suddenly, there’s a burst of light.

It floods your vision, stirring your senses, and a comfortable weight around your head that you didn’t know was there is lifted. A gasp is stolen from your lips, filling your lungs and you realize you’re alive again. It’s hard to see, for your vision to adjust as your lashes flutter, and you squint.

But it eventually does adjust and you see again. Namely, you discover a certain man with sparkling irises and a dimpled smile in front of you.

“Hey.” His voice is deep, soft. It ignites an emotion stowed deep in your heart. “How was it?”

Your mouth draws open and your feeble voice croaks out, “Namjoon?”

His smile fades as he searches your expression and you fall out of the chair, frantically grabbing onto the sleeves of his white lab coat. You pull him into a hug and cry out, “Oh my god, Namjoon!”

He’s stiff against your body, not returning your embrace, but you don’t pay any mind. You’re too overwhelmed from seeing him again. “Is-Is this heaven?” you ask while shutting your eyes and savouring the moment.

“What? No.” He looks over his shoulder and you don’t know where to.

You pull away but keep him in your reach, your hands curled into his clothes. “But if this isn’t heaven, then how is this possible?”

Namjoon’s hands wrap around your shoulders and he takes a step back, lowering his height slightly to have his eyes connect to yours. “Y/N, do you know where you are?”

“What?”

“You’ve woken up to reality,” he enunciates gingerly and carefully. “You were just in a VR simulation for the past few years. We’ve been watching you.”

You don’t understand. It doesn’t make any sense.

He’s scaring you. “What are you talking about? What’s going on, Joon?”

Namjoon leans back and looks towards the glass window. “Subject two has no recollection of past memories and no grasp of reality,” he deadpans in a monotone. “Will need monitoring for further investigation of potential symptoms and ramifications of simulation 230616.”

He turns back to you, a large distance kept between your bodies. As if you were strangers to each other. He merely says, “Everything will be okay.”

It does little to reassure you. And the Namjoon that you’re familiar with is nothing but reassuring.

Instead of dying, instead of surrendering to the darkness, you’ve been placed in a room with stark white floors, walls, a bed and a tinted window. Fluorescent lights burn your lids and you feel frightened, but it’s coming back to you. Slowly.

You cradle yourself, murmuring, “I am Y/N L/N.”

They said you were placed in a simulation. “I am twenty eight.” The ninety years you lived wasn’t real.

“I am a software engineer and scientist at Realtion.”

You recall some parts as if they were distant memories of your childhood. Blurred. Faint. But even then, they’re merely fragments of a whole mirror, puzzles of a much larger piece. You remember being excited after you were picked to be one of the first to test the simulation. You remember getting into the chair, remembering placing the headset over your head and covering your eyes. You remember the countdown of a smooth, dulcet voice — the same one that had greeted you when it was all over.

The door opens and you jolt.

The person that enters is the same one you’ve been thinking about.

Namjoon ducks his head to get in. “I don’t know why they make these goddamn doors so small.”

You smile unintentionally. But it’s easy to relax when it’s him.

“I hope I wasn’t interrupting,” he says.

“Interrupting what? I’m being monitored like a lab rat. There’s nothing for you to interrupt.” To prove your point, you open your arms to your surroundings. It’s pretty obvious what they think about you considering the walls and floor are plush. This isn’t any different from a padded cell save for the few furniture pieces.

Namjoon shuts the door and gives you an incredulous expression. “Don’t be like that. They’re just worried.”

“Of my psychological state? Yeah.” You lean against the wall, seated on your bed. “Might be normal though considering I thought that simulation was my reality and I barely remember anything of my actual reality.”

He snorts. “The simulation has a few kinks, but we can iron it out. It might be a bit too immersive.”

You deadpan, “You think?”

Namjoon grins and takes a seat on the uncomfortable white chair by the desk. “It’s good to see you returning to yourself. Everyone’s missed you, Y/N.”

You hum a low note, looking away.

It’s hard to cope and you’re still traumatizing on multiple levels, but that doesn’t mean your entire personality will suddenly up and vanish. If anything, you know you’re being rather snippy towards everyone — that you’re taking out your anger on them even though it’s unwarranted. It’s not like they were the ones who forced you to step into the simulation. It’s not like they knew this would happen.

But that doesn’t mean you aren’t upset.

Everything you lived for, everything you loved, your entire life — it’s been a lie. A virtual reality.

“Why are you here?” you ask after the silence is prolonged.

“I just wanted to check up on you.”

You pause. “How many.”

“How many…?”

You look back at him, gaze meeting his. “How many people were watching?”

Namjoon hesitates, but he answers you. “Just three. Me, Jimin and Hoseok.”

A scoff emits from your throat and you roll your eyes. You can’t believe all of the private moments in your life were being observed and recorded by others the entire time. You really were a lab rat and you still are.

“It’s confidential, Y/N,” Namjoon says. “You know that. Nothing unnecessary will be written in the final report.”

“It’s still intrusive,” you spit and soften, knees pressed against your chest as if physically curling into yourself is all the protection you have left. “It’s just….it’s just hard to cope with.”

“I know,” he murmurs gently.

“I don’t think you do,” you bite back. “I lived this entire life, this full life and to know everything was just a figment of my imagination, that nothing was real, that we—” You interrupt yourself. “Never mind.”

You know if you get too upset and your blood pressure spikes, a whole team might run in. Or maybe they already know Namjoon’s in here with you.

“You don’t need to worry about it,” he pipes up, reassuring but in the moment you want it least. “The world you were in, it was constructed by your subconscious. You couldn’t control it. And relationships are built on the people who are close to you.”

There’s a moment of quiet. You hope he doesn’t say it, but he does—

“So it’s only natural that we ended up married and with kids and all that.”

You scoff.

There’s an array of emotions that overwhelm you. Hurt that Namjoon could brush off sixty years of your marriage like that and what was so entirely real to you. Mortified that others saw how your subconscious built an intimate relationship with a colleague of yours. Confused at what you feel, how you yearn for the man across the room who you once called your dear husband— but it wasn’t real. It wasn’t real.

So these feelings aren’t real.

Right?

“If it’s only natural, then how come we’re not together in this ‘reality’.” It’s a bold question, but there’s no point in reserving yourself. You’ve already lived ninety years, so you know what kind of regrets are born in the face of hesitation and miscommunication. Confrontation is easy after so much experience. “You saw everything, didn’t you? You watched it all?”

Namjoon is quiet. “I did.”

“Then what do you think?”

You want to ask him how he felt about it. If he viewed that life with cold eyes and an impassive mind or if he possibly felt something, even as a bystander.

“Was our relationship really just a wild part of my subconscious, Namjoon?”

The hurt you feel burrows deeper when he turns away from you in an extended silence. Your lips part, about to tell him to go away, so you don’t confuse the simulation with reality. But he beats you to the punch—

“It was my fault,” Namjoon murmurs and your head whips up to him. Your gazes connect. “That night before you were going into the simulation, I said something I shouldn’t have.”

“What do you mean?”

“I….I knew you were going into the simulation for two years, so I thought I’d take my chance and if the outcome was bad, I would’ve been gone by then. I was an idiot. I didn’t know this would happen, that it would affect your subconscious so much.”

You slide off your bed, brows furrowed. “What did you say to me?”

Silence.

You come closer to him, raising your voice— “What did you tell me, Namjoon?!”

“I said I couldn’t stop thinking about you!” Namjoon’s eyes are darkened with regret, burning with embarrassment and shame. “We went out for drinks and I drank too much and I told you that if you wanted me to, I would wait for you. Until this was done.” He pulls a hand through the blonde strands of his hair, and he gets up from his spot. “There’s no point. You don’t remember it.”

But you grab him before he leaves, clutching the sleeve of his white lab coat. “What did I say?”

Desperation aches deep within you. A curiosity that eats at your brain.

Namjoon looks back at you and relays the memories you don’t have. “You said I shouldn’t wait for you, but if things don’t change and the timing is right, you’ll give your answer when you get back.”

Your breath hitches in your throat. Namjoon searches your expression. It’s an intimate moment without interruption where you don’t care who might be watching or if there’s someone on the other side of the window. It feels like there’s just you and Namjoon. All that really matters.

Yet he forces you to let go of him. “I don’t want you to get confused with the simulation and reality.”

“Does it matter if it was real or not? What I feel is real. What I feel for you is real,” you spit as your annoyance surges. “Everyone keeps telling me what’s real or fake but no one wants to acknowledge that my experiences were real to me! Isn’t that the point of the simulation?!”

Namjoon’s eyes have widened. Your breathing is ragged, chest falling and rising. “I spent sixty years with you, Namjoon! We grew old together. And do you know what my first thought was when I saw you again?” You laugh bitterly. “‘Thank god he’s here, I can be with him again’.”

There are tears in your eye, welling up and blurring your vision.

Namjoon doesn’t utter a single word. He doesn’t make any excuses, any rebuttals, and doesn’t argue. He stops invalidating what you feel and instead closes the distance and embraces you.

His arms wrap around your shoulders and you lean into him, savouring it and shutting your eyes.

You know Namjoon’s worries have merit to it, that the others will think the same as he does. They’ll think you’re confusing the simulation with reality, that your ability to differentiate has weakened, that your feelings were manifested and nurtured by the simulation. They’ll think this isn’t real.

But time will tell.

You’ve already stood the test of time with Namjoon once. You have a feeling, a second time won’t be difficult.

#bts fanfic #bts scenario #namjoon fanfic #namjoon scenario #bts sci-fi #namjoon angst #namjoon fluff #verryy interesting concept anon #thanks for sending it in #jimlingss #Anonymous

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riddleblack246 · 4 years ago

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For @scoobydean and @destielsecretsanta2020

“This could be nice for Jack.”

“’My First Christmas’. Cas, this is meant for babies.”

“It’s still his first Christmas with us.”

“That mean we should get one for you too?”

“If you’d like.”

Read below for some Team Free Will 3.0 holiday head canons~!

After everything goes down with Jack makes use of his new abilities, Sam and Dean are much more willing to fight to keep him with them. He initially wonders if it is because he’s “useful” to them now. The brothers promptly inform him that no, it’s because this is the first time where they can all feel safe enough to take a breath. Sure, they’re still hunters. But after everything they’ve been through, they all deserve a chance to enjoy life without constantly looking over their shoulders. And so Jack stays.

As promised, he brought back those that were loved and lost. Obviously everyone is relieved and thankful, but that is most clearly seen in the return of Eileen and Castiel. Sam and Eileen are quick to pick up where they left off. Castiel, however, is a bit more hesitant. He didn’t expect to ever see Dean again. He truly thought he wouldn’t have to know Dean’s feelings and when he confessed, he felt he could live with that. But now he’s suddenly back in this world, aware of his existence and the knowledge that he told the man he’d been in love with for over a decade how he felt. But Dean doesn’t allow him to panic for long. Enveloping Cas in his arms, he’s squeezing the angel’s vessel so tightly that he can barely get out the words. Nonetheless, he does and finally returns the sentiment that Castiel never expected to hear.

“I love you too, Cas.”

And now to dig into holiday centric joys!

By the time Christmas rolls around, the bunker’s primary couples have developed a sense of routine. Eileen has finally moved in and Dean and Castiel have eased into a comfortable romantic domesticity. And for the first time in a while, there are no hunts to investigate or major threats to take on, and the Winchesters found themselves able to celebrate the holidays in a way that they hadn’t had a chance to in some time (save for the Mrs. Butters stint).

On the first of December, Dean sits down in the library and begins to make a list, trying to figure out exactly what was expected of a traditional Christmas. When Sam catches him, he expects scoffs of disagreement or just bored indifference. Instead, he supplies the idea of inviting some people to the bunker.

“What, Sammy? You want to throw a Christmas rager?” (The statement does earn him an eye roll)

“No. I just thought it might be nice. See everyone together.”

Neither of them explicitly say why it would be nice, but they know the relief that would come with seeing each person they never expected to see again. Dean tasks his brother with making a guest list and sending out an e-mail to those on it (because Dean draws the line at trying to make actual invitations).

The response is overwhelmingly positive and soon enough, they’re fielding constant texts from Garth, asking if it would be okay to bring his kids, and e-mails from Donna, offering to bake a multitude of requested holiday treats.

Amidst holiday planning, the group allows themselves to give into expectations of the season. Jack and Castiel are largely in the dark of what is or isn’t part of the holidays and while Dean, Sam, and Eileen aren’t the most immersed, they do have an idea of what is to be done and are admittedly eager to dive in.

One of the first things on Dean’s list is to decorate a tree. He even insists on cutting one down himself, as aside from various times he had to cut and sharpen his own stakes, it’s something he’s never had a chance to do. Sam, reluctant to join him, tells his brother to have fun. In the spirit of “giving”, Dean bring Cas and Jack along, assuring Sam and Eileen that they’ll “be a while ;)”. They return some hours later with a tree that rivals the Rockefeller Center and relief in the fact that they have two celestial beings to transport something of that size. Decorating it is another story.

After digging through the bunker and finding that, no, the Men of Letters did not hoard Christmas ornaments or wreaths or any such things among their piles of artifacts and cursed objects, the groups decides to get a little shopping done. They initially hit a big box store for a bunch of basics - lights, tinsel, various colored balls (Dean makes several jokes about this), but as the month goes on, all of them are guilty of picking up random items to decorate with while out.

Eileen delightedly shows her boys a Christmas pyramid she bought and is quick to tell Jack that he can’t light it whenever he wants, as forgetting about it could result in burning down the bunker.

Sam buys all of them advent calendars, each dedicated specifically to every member of the bunker. Dean doesn’t comment on Sam’s shift toward the holiday spirit, not only because he’s happy that his brother has allowed himself to be more joyfully invested in things, but also because every day for the month he gets to appreciate a new and weird specialty bottle of hot sauce. Sam’s own contains different types of tea, Eileen’s has jam, Jack’s has little LEGO figures, and Castiel’s has coffee.

Jack nearly gives Dean a heart attack one morning when the man wakes up to find a nutcracker as tall as he is in the crow’s nest. Jack tells him all about finding it in a shop he and Castiel passed when getting supplies and insisting that it was a perfect thing to have for the bunker. Dean looks to Castiel and knows the angel would have been too soft to say no. Then again, he knows he would have been just as guilty.

Castiel begins buying ornaments for people in the bunker. Even with Dean teasing him about it, he does buy a “my first Christmas” ornament and puts a photo of Jack inside that Eileen helped him print out. He finds that he is particularly fond of ornaments that contain photos and begins to buy ones for that explicit purpose.

Dean doesn’t necessarily have a type of decoration that he finds himself buying outside of what they have, but he is fond of the lights. He usually insists they stay on as long as allotted, urging whoever is the last to go to bed to turn them off (though it’s usually himself).

When it does snow, Dean is eventually irritable about it with Sam and Eileen in a similar boat, though to a lesser degree. Shoveling snow out of the way of the bunker’s entrance is a pain in the ass and none of them love the chore of getting treads on their respective tires. But seeing Jack’s fascination with it - and realizing that it’s his first time encountering snow, they find themselves softening.

After getting help in clearing access to the bunker, the group spends much of the day outside. There is an unspoken agreement that they want Jack to experience all the great enjoyments of snow and it honestly brings out the kid in them too. They build a mediocre snowman (Sam takes the heat for his poor artistic skills), make snow angels (the jokes about Castiel doing so get old within five minutes), have a snowball fight (Eileen is fucking ruthless and not above putting snow down jackets), and creating makeshift sleds to race. The sledding is what ultimately makes them go back inside. Garbage can lids are hard to steer and after Dean eats it by running into a tree and loosing a tooth, even Cas fixing it doesn’t resolve the choice to go in. Nonetheless, the accident doesn’t stall the mood, as Dean insists on introducing Jack to one more awesome component of the Traditional Snow Day - the hot chocolate at the end. Said hot cocoa almost results in a fight when, after Dean makes enough for all of them, Castiel reluctantly admits that he doesn’t care for it, and Dean and Jack nearly come to childish blows over who gets his mug. Later that evening, Castiel makes sure to thank Dean privately for allowing Jack to have it. ;)

Now, when it comes to cooking, Dean likes to consider himself pretty well-versed. Baking is another story. The preciseness that’s required is what gets him. Sure, he can be meticulous, but he’s always been more of a “little of this, a bunch of that” kind of guy over exact measurements, which leaves a lot more room for error when it comes to baking. But after going on a “Gilmore Girls” binge with Castiel (the couple constantly debates the superior show of the former and “Dr. Sexy, M.D.”), he can’t help imagining a scene of tenderly showing Cas how to roll out dough and mussing some flour in his hair and watching the angel lick the spoon in a way that borders on pornographic. The day after watching, he’s searching for cookie recipes and telling Castiel to dig out some aprons.

As is the Winchester way, this expectation does not come to fruition. Cas, as he thought, didn’t know a thing about cooking or baking. But Dean pictured being able to guide him, to do all the romantic shit you see in Hallmark movies. Instead, the angel is complaining about not being able to just will the baked goods into existence, standing in the way when Dean needs to get any kind of ingredient, and getting flour on every fucking surface in the kitchen. Things reach a boiling point when Cas pulls the cookies out of the oven, sans oven mitts, and for a brief moment, Dean’s brain operates on a panic reflex and snatches the tray from his hands. The result is their hours of baking scattered all over the floor, a dented baking sheet, and second-degree burns on the hunter’s hands. He’s huffing and cursing and he fully expects Cas to scold him and point out the obvious fact that he’s an angel and such temperatures have no effect on him. But instead, he watched Castiel pulled his hands from the faucet (having immediately shoved them under there after he burned himself) and tenderly brushes his finger tips over the wounds. Dean feels the familiar sensation of healing flesh, something he hasn’t felt in a bit and he’s silent as Cas brings the newly healed skin to his lips and presses a kiss to his palms. The irritability baking had brought them is gone. Dean lets Cas wave the kitchen clean and they decide to just go out and buy Christmas cookies instead. Later that evening, Cas’ lips taste like ginger and Dean finds that the reality is way better than the fantasy.

They ultimately end up hosting the party that started their shift into the Christmas spirit a few days before the actual holiday. After all, they know most of their friends prefer flying over driving and it might be a lot to ask them to come out on the actual holiday. But their concerns of traffic and irritated guests soon fly out the window in the face of so many familiar… well, faces. Hugs never stop coming and despite everyone’s claim that gifts would not be necessary, everyone knows that’s bullshit and a pile beneath their ridiculous tree grows with every teasing comment and expression of happy holidays.

Speaking of the tree, Castiel is quite pleased with his holiday crafting and the other members of the bunker share that sentiment. Since the angel discovered the photo-insert ornaments, he had taken it upon himself to spend random periods during the month finding photographs of each important person in their lives that he could and putting them into such items. Everyone takes joy in searching for their own picture. Claire comments that he picked a terrible one of her, but Cas hears her quietly asking Dean if she could take it home with her, as it features her and Kaia pressed close in a hug. Charlie adores her’s and insists that she wants to make the same craft, but only if they do it together. Everyone quietly appreciates the ones made for those that aren’t present to appreciate them. Jack ensures that Mary’s ornament has prime placement. Eileen hugs Sam when she catches him looking at Kevin’s for a while. Dean makes a point to kiss Castiel privately after finding Bobby’s nestled among some tinsel. Everyone agrees that their the best decorations in the place.

Hunters and those that know them have never been known to operate on a normal schedule, so it is nearly three in the morning before the bunker clears out. Some have elected to drive home if the trip was relatively easy. Others have settled into the many spare rooms that the bunker holds. Once all the gifts have been opened, the eggnog’s been drunk, and everyone has eaten their weight in treats, only Dean and Cas remain in the quiet bunker. They sit together in the library, positioned on one of the many extended seats they’d brought out to fit their guests. The lights of the enormous tree are still on at Dean’s request and Castiel can’t help staring at the way the different colors still look so beautiful on him. He glances up at the other decorations strewn about. The bows, the poinsettias (Garth had brought something like ten of them), the holly, the- He spots a familiar item of decor. He’d seen Sam and Eileen equally position themselves under it in wait of their partner, always stopping them with the insistence that a kiss must be administered before they continue on their way about the bunker. Lazily, he nudges Dean and points to the archways between the crow’s nest and the hall that leads to the bedrooms.

“Is standing beneath that a requirement for kissing?”

Dean follows his finger and huff out a laugh. Even though they hadn’t been dating long, they’d been together for so many years that he knows the angel is teasing. He turns to meet his eyes, smiling at the way the lights almost change them from blue to a rainbow of color.

“What, you want to kiss under the mistletoe? Now?”

For a moment, it seems as if he’s considering the offer. But instead, he shakes his head and reaches a hand up to cup Dean’s cheek. He knows that he could have kiss Dean under there the same way Eileen and Sam do. But he knows they’re different. Dean is a lot of thing and as much as he would deny it, one of those things is private. Their relationship is simultaneously new and so so ingrained into their life. Affection was always something there, just beneath the surface. And while he had the thing he desired for so long, that doesn’t mean he feels the need to push Dean into a realm of affection that just isn’t fitting of who they are together. Leaning forward, he captures Dean’s lips in a kiss. He tastes like eggnog and candy cane.

Castiel understands all the more that happiness is in the being. And he no longer fears his joy. Because he can’t imagine being happier than holding Dean beneath these lights and knowing that they still have tomorrow and so many days to come. There is no better present than that.

#destielsecretsanta2020 #scoobydean #supernatural #Destiel #saileen #saleen #jack kline #my posts

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amateurwriter89 · 4 years ago

Text

DREAM

Second part of STAY

Rated M RojasCorp Fic

She was in the midpoint between consciousness and deep sleep. The heaviness of her eyelids was the most evident signal but she refused to fall asleep even though her exhausted and sore muscles begged her to.

No, Andrea was not ready to close her eyes and put an end to that night; she wanted to stay awake so she could treasure every detail of the woman who decided to share her bed with, even for just one night; she wanted to memorize everything, the rhythm of her breath, the scent of her hair, the feel of her skin against hers.

Andrea laid on her right side, left arm wrapped around Lena’s waist, bringing her body closer to hers, burying her face into silky black hair. She inhaled deeply, the aroma was a mixture of coconut and something exotic, something sweet and alluring. It was an evocative smell because it was what she remembered, the same smell she breathed when they used to share the small bed back in boarding school, the same scent with which she felt intoxicated that New Years night when they shyly explored their bodies for the first time without clothes in between.

The latina lost track of time, she was immersed in her memories until Lena snuggled into Andrea and that unconscious movement caused her to shudder. There was no space between them, it was an intimate contact and Andrea was very aware of every inch of Lena’s bare body.

That night took a course that neither of them imagined. They were supposed to talk while drinking a couple of drinks, after all, what they wanted was to fix their friendship. Nevertheless, something in that dynamic ended up awakening a buried need, it was like a yearning to get back what they used to have that perhaps was enhanced by their loneliness. Andrea knew very well that Lena hadn’t been with anyone since she broke up with James and the same happened with the brunette and her ex. Or maybe, the mere idea of sharing that night with her friend, with her former lover, was simply inviting and impossible to denied.

Andrea felt curious. Ten years had passed since their last encounter and, of course, a lot of things had changed. Their bodies were different, they had matured; now they knew more clearly what they liked and weren’t shy about showing their passion. The brunette had to close her eyes when images of Lena in thrones of passion played in her mind.

Gone was the shy girl who felt unsure of her physical attributes, the one who, at the beginning of her sexual awakening, asked to turn off the lights and hide under the sheets. Young Andrea never denied her anything, she respected her wishes, even though she assured her that she had nothing to be ashamed of, but this Lena was totally different. She wasn’t ashamed to kiss, touch or chase pleasure. She was an attentive lover to the needs of her partner.

That night would remain in Andrea Roja’s mind for a very long time and, though she couldn’t speak for Lena, she tried to leave her caresses on Lena’s skin. She dug her fingers into alabaster skin with a little more force, she left hickeys on he neck and thighs that might’ve made her deserve a scolding when Lena saw them in the mirror but it would be worthy because Andrea was so lucky to witness the wonder of how Lena lost herself, on more that one occasion, in the ecstasy of sex; shel felt her clenched around her fingers, tasted her in her mouth, trembled over her.

Just thinking about what happened minutes before caused a silly smile to appear on Andrea's face and, of course, her arousal awakened once more. She become addicted to Lena’s taste, to the mix of their perfumes, to her subtly caresses.

Blue eyes looked at the dark mane of her lover. She felt restless, she felt a thirst that could only be soothed by Lena.

—Can’t sleep?

Lena’s voice sounded deeper and raspier due to her brief sleep and Andrea found it extremely seductive.

—No.

For a moment, Andrea thought that her friend fell asleep again.

—If you need to rest, I can call my driver.

Those words sounded so causal.

—It’s not that.

—Want to talk about it?

Andrea was not a shy woman at all but quite the opposite. She was direct, assertive, trained to get what she wanted and what she wanted at that moment was within her total reach.

—No, not really…

Andrea supported her weight on her right arm, so she could look down at Lena while with her left hand she invited her lover to turn her face towards her. The position was awkward but allowed them to look into each other’s eyes with intensity. Andrea took the opportunity to draw the outline of the other woman’s lips with her thumb; they were still swollen from their previous activities and that made them look even more inviting.

—Can I kiss you? —Andrea asked almost politely even though she knew she might as well steal a kiss from Lena.

Andrea expected a cunning answer, perhaps a flirty smile but Lena was known for being unpredictable and Andrea was pleasantly surprised when Lena brought her hand to her lips and kissed her palm before she wrapped her lips around her index and middle fingers, circled them with her tongue. Andrea closed her eyes and focused on the feeling of that wet tongue playing with her own fingers.

—Lena —Andrea whimpered pathetically while her hips started to move against Lena’s rear, following the exact rhythm of that gifted tongue and searching for the right angle that could help her to release the nice tension in her belly. She could feel her wetness coated her lover’s skin and, judging by the chocked groan that came from her throat, Andrea knew that Lena was enjoying the fast paced of her humping.

—Do you still want to kiss me? —Lena asked once she released the brunette’s fingers and Andrea could only respond with a furious kiss. Her mind went blank, her reactions were influenced by her primal instincts.

The movement of her hips were limited due to the tight nearness between them and the perfect kiss that neither of them wanted to brake. Their tongues slipped and slid against each other, they danced, licked without qualms. It was erotic how their quite moans died in each others mouths.

Andrea’s skin began to sweat, she could feel her expensive Egyptian cotton sheets stuck on her body, making her feel too hot. Pushing the sheet as far as she could, she revealed the nakedness of both of them and the brunette took the opportunity to slide her hand up the soft skin of Lena’s thigh, the curve of her waist, feeling the space between her ribs with her fingertips and palming possessively her breast, just to slid down again, following back the same path.

Andrea panted against Lena’s lips as her hand worked its way between her legs, gripping her inner thigh and pushing it up.

—Touch yourself for me. —Andrea asked.

Lena let out a new groan and, with the desire to please her lover, she did what was requested of her and, although Andrea could not see Lena’s movements, she could feel them thanks to the swaying of her hips, so in sync with those playful fingers.

The muscles in Andrea’s right arm began to burn from the weight she was bearing. However, she didn’t allow herself to fall, she wanted to see the exact moment when Lena surrendered to the pleasure she gave herself, she wanted to witness the moment when every wall she built around herself collapsed, revealing the sweet vulnerability that only could come from the irrepressible lust.

The brunette’s lips pecked Lena’s shoulder and those little kisses soon became small bites while her hips kept attacking the backside of her lover without missing a beat.

—You’re so wet. —Lena mumbled, turning her face a little towards Andrea, who could see blown green eyes, overshadowed by her own arousal.

—Only for you… always for you.

And it was true. Andrea had had several lovers, lovers who were considerate, passionate but none of them like Lena.

For a while, Andrea supposed that the idea of her first love, the one with whom she lived new experiences in the four walls of a room, was unconsciously romanticized by herself, placing it on a pedestal, and maybe that was the reason she missed it, why she missed Lena so much and why she tried so hard to push back the fantasies she had where Lena was something more than a friend to her. Nevertheless, that night Andrea noticed that there was still an unquestionable chemistry between Lena and her; there was still a trust that let them break orthodoxies and express desire with their entire bodies.

Andrea could feel how Lena trembled, her movements were more erratic and the brunette knew that Lena’s orgasm was closer and closer, torturing herself because it was evidente that Lena was seeking to reach the end with Andrea.

—Are you close? —Asked Andrea and the only answer she received was a furious nod.

Andrea growled with pleasure, for it was not common for Lena Luthor, always the eloquent, to have been left speechless and that was a moment that she always treasured because she was the reason for that inability, she was the woman who was stealing the most sensual moans, who was leading the black-haired woman to a new orgasm.

The beautiful latina bit her lip, she was also near to the edge, she could feel the tension in her navel, her breath was rough and the expectation of what would soon be unleashed gave Andrea goosebumps. It was at that moment her movements lacked grace and rhythm, a primal need had taken control of Andrea but something separated her from the vibrant ending.

—Andrea… I…

Lena’s voice was a trigger that tensed her entire body. Her fingers dug into her lover’s flesh and her hand was so close to her core that she could feel the heat that radiated from her and, without thinking too much, Andrea laid Lena on her back and suddenly she was over her. Her legs were entwined in an intimate embrace and, for a moment, they stayed still, absorbed in a sea of sensations that were both familiar and new.

Andrea’s eyes were captivated by the image of the woman beneath her. Lena’s cheeks were flushed and rebel locks of black hair clung to snowy skin due to sweat. Andrea was free to touch and she did it; her caress was soft, her fingertips brushed warm skin as if it was the most delicate thing in the entire world.

—You’re so beautiful. —Andrea whispered just before kissing Lena’s lips painfully slow, savoring every twist of their tongues, while the bed rocked swiftly as a result of firms thrusts.

The position was perfect for their centers to meet and melt; the oxygen was not enough and the kiss became a endless series of pants against each others’ mouths.

—Please… —Lena begged with her eyes tightly closed and raising her knees so Andrea could have better access to her most intimate parts. Her nails scratched the brunette’s back, causing a pleasant pain that would surely leave traces of that hot night on her skin—. Andrea…

Lena’s moans made Andrea’s ears tingled, they were like a symphony that reached her heart.

Andrea raised her upper body a little to have a glimpse of what was happening between her and her lover, to admire Lena’s face at the down of ecstasy, to get lost in the hypnotic sway of her breasts and palming one of them possessively, only to look down where their bodies joined.

All this felt like a dream, like everything was possible, like she could have Lena back to her life once again as something more than a friend.

A hand climbed up Andrea’s arm, running over her shoulder and clinging at the nape of her head.

—Look at me —Lena asked and Andrea obeyed—. Make me cum, darling.

Andrea was not sure what triggered their shared orgasm, maybe it was the intense look in their eyes or the last frantic movements of their bodies, perhaps the perfect merge of both factors, either way, the sensation was blinding and she could feel how every nerve in her body vibrated with satisfaction.

The brunette hid her face in the crook of Lena’s neck, noticing that her perfume was more intense. Her heart was racing and she could feel Lena trying to catch her breath while her hands caressed her back up and down, soothing her, lulling her.

—Tired?

Lena murmured against Andrea’s temple just to plant a kiss who just nodded lazily.

Andrea still had too many doubts about what would happen the next morning but she was so sleepy that she didn’t think of the possible consequences, all she wanted was to fall asleep in Lena’s arms and keep dreaming about Lena.

#rojascorp #lena luthor #Andrea Rojas #fanfic #rated m

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intubatedangel · 4 years ago

Text

Cold Snap: Chapter 7

Story Index - All my stories in one place.

***

As soon as the camera angle changed, presumably someone in the news control room had realised they were showing a possibly dead woman under intensive CPR and had cut away, Anna and Carl started to get prepared. Carl called out for his team to join him in Trauma 4, the other rooms already claimed by those doctors who were scheduled for today. There was fewer of them than normal, a few of the nurses already occupied with minor injuries or the other trauma rooms. Zainab was also occupied by the cubicles, sheer practicality making her more useful with the minor injuries that don't need a fully qualified emergency doctor to double-check.

Anna and Carl were joined by Kirstie, Roger, and Trish. It would be enough for now; they could also call for additional help if they needed it when their patient arrived. Carl looked at them, figuring out a plan.

"We all saw what we're dealing with. Cold water drowning, clearly no pulse. Don't expect it to be any different when they arrive here. Our priorities are maintaining artificial circulation and oxygenation while we warm her up. We need to go fast, but careful. The last thing we need is to trigger rewarming collapse. Kirstie, I want you get in touch with Cardio-thoracics and with Nephrology, I want an ECMO or a dialysis machine, both can heat her blood directly, so either will do. We'll also need warmed saline, a lot of it Roger, I want to get a warmed gastric lavage going as soon as we can and depending on her temperature, we may need to consider a thoracic lavage too."

Anna cringed slightly at that. A thoracic lavage would involve sticking tube through their patient’s chest wall. It was brutal, but effective. Carl was continuing.

"Anna, Trish, get the temperature vest set up too, warm her from inside and out. Remember everyone, we have time. We do not give up until she is warm, understood?" The team all nods. "Ok, let’s get ready people." Carl finished, the others all going about their tasks. Trish went to get the temperature vest from Trauma 1, giving Anna a few moments alone with Carl.

"You sound confident." Anna told him as they stepped out of the way of the others.

He shrugged. "We have every reason to be. We have the equipment, the skills, and the circumstances favour us. Cold water drowning discovered almost instantly? It's not a guarantee, but in our line of work? It's the best damn odds we could ask for." He looked at her seeing her far off gaze. "Are you doing ok?" He asked.

She nodded slowly, then looked back at him, with a sharper nod. "Yeah. Just doing what you said." Her voice went quieter, just between the two of them. "Accepting it. Using it."

Carl nodded slowly. "Ok. Let me know if it gets too much. You can take a step back if you need to." He told her, keeping his own voice quiet.

Anna slipped her hand into his and they gave a mutual squeeze. Then, Trish came into the room with the bulky vest and Anna went to help her. They laid it on the trauma bed, spread open, ready and waiting for them. To Anna it looked inviting, and she couldn't help but wonder what it would be like to be wrapped up in it. At this point she would normally feel ashamed and try to bury the thought. This time, she didn't try to eradicate it. Instead, she filed it away. Something to think about later, maybe...even do later. She thought back to her unit on psychology during nursing school. Using rewards to encourage behaviour. If they succeeded, she would ask Carl if he could 'tinker' with one over the rest of the weekend, they were his experiment after all, maybe they could be her reward.

She shook her head, dispelling the fantasy and disguising the small smile on her face, as if she were trying to shake a stray lock of hair out of her eyes while she was setting the control panel on the pump unit, which they had hooked to the end of the bed. The had just finished arranging the hoses so they wouldn't be an obstruction when a receptionist stuck her head into the trauma room.

"We just got a 2-minute warning on the casualty." She announced.

"Thanks" Carl dismissed her, looking to the rest of his team. Kirstie was still on the phone in the corner, and she shrugged at Carl's questioning look. "Keep trying, everyone else, let's get out front."

* * *

Lucy kept on rocking her body weight forward and backward, keeping her shoulders and elbows locked, hands planted between Shona's pale breasts. Each time she leant forward, her hands pressed down the drowned young woman’s sternum 2 inches, squeezing Shona's stopped heart, pushing blood out of it and around her body. When Lucy rocked backwards, Shona's ribs sprang back also, releasing the pressure on her heart and allowing it to refill with blood.

Lucy did this over and over and over again, keeping the blood flowing. Keeping hope alive.

She'd heard the driver call out the minute warning. She was aware of Dave hooking things to the gurney and moving around her. She was also aware of the burning in her arms, the lead weight feeling of lactic acid build up. It was a long, excruciating minute. But Lucy never faltered. Shona's ribs bent inwards 100 times in that minute. Each perfect compression forced her abdomen to roll and her shoulders to pop. Her feet swayed and her head bobbed as the force of the compressions translated through her body. It was brutal, what her body was enduring. But that brutality was the only chance she had.

Lucy felt the entire ambulance tilt as it swung into the hospital grounds, felt the inertia tugging her as the brakes squealed and brought the ambulance to a stop. She ignored it all, maintaining her compressions until she saw the blur out the corner of her eye as Anna mounted the gurney, straddling Shona's unresponsive body. Just like they had done two days ago, and so many times before, Anna gave a short countdown before Lucy drew back her hands, Anna planted her own, and Shona's chest continued to be compressed.

The gurney was pulled from the back of the ambulance, Dave squeezing the Ambu-bag regularly, and was rushed towards the emergency entrance. Lucy let them go. She dropped onto the bench, flexing her aching fingers and breathing deeply to pay off the oxygen debt. She shook her arms out, then looked at the man beside her. Jones was still wrapped tightly in the blanket and was staring out after the gurney that had already disappeared around a corner and vanished from sight.

"Come on Jones, you need to get to checked over." She told him, dragging herself to her feet. She helped him from the back of the ambulance, despite the exhaustion she was feeling, and led him toward the entrance. An observer would have struggled to tell which was helping the other, and Lucy was grateful to the porter who ran over with a wheelchair, easing Jones into it before she pushed him into the busy triage area, leaning heavily on the handles herself.

* * *

The wind had eased to a stiff breeze, though it still cut straight through you, in the hour since Shona had fatefully boarded the now sunk Beetle. Yet, none of the team that had assembled outside the sliding door was shivering. Their collective adrenaline rush banished the cold. There was a tension, but it was that invigorating kind of tension, rather than a panic fuelled one. They knew they were up to the task. Their determination was written all over their faces. So, they stood, filled with an anticipation that grew in intensity as the sirens of the ambulance grew louder. Like the legendary warrior, calmly waiting to enter an arena, their own kind of battle was about to begin, and they radiated the same serenity. The same clarity of purpose. The same capacity to spring into action at a moment’s notice.

The siren reached a crescendo, with an accompaniment of squealing tires, as the ambulance pulled into the emergency bay. Anna waited a beat, then stepped forward, giving Roger and Trish just enough time to pull open the rear doors of the ambulance, before she planted her foot on the step, lined herself up, and vaulted onto the gurney. Her knees made the metallic blanket crinkle as she landed softly and shuffled her knees forward. She gave the countdown, and as soon as Lucy's hands left the patients sternum, Anna snapped hers into position.

Even through her blue gloves, Anna could feel just how cold the young woman was. Her ghostly pale skin seemed to pull the warmth out of Anna's hands in an instant. It did not deter the nurse. She began her initial round of compressions. The first press was firm and harsh, to gauge the resistance of her patient’s chest, then those that followed were perfectly judged, pushing in the ideal two inches and drawing back fully in under a second. The gurney moving beneath her had no effect on Anna. She was in her zone. This, this was what she was born to do, and nothing, internal or external, could disturb her rhythm as she put all her effort into delivering the best chest compressions she could to the young woman who lay pulseless between her legs.

As she settled into her task, she became more aware of what was going on around her. She heard the whistling of the flatlined monitor, and she heard Carl say something loudly. He was clearly asking for details, as Anna began to hear the response from the paramedic who was pushing the gurney with one hand, while he squeezed the Ambu-bag that was connected to a breathing tube with the other.

"This is Shona. Trapped and immersed in near freezing water. Immersion resulted in asphyxiation via drowning. Due to the water temperature she's profoundly hypothermic, skin temperature of just 23C. She's been in respiratory and cardiac arrest for between 18 and 25 minutes, confirmed asystole for 5 of those, but likely much longer. Resuscitation attempts started 14 minutes ago, with no response. She also has a closed fracture to her left tibia. We cleared her lungs and intubated 8 minutes ago, applied chemical heat packs and warmed saline as much as we could. Throughout she's had a palpable pulse with compressions, so major internal bleeding is unlikely."

Carl nodded through the report, and Anna knew he was taking in everything, filing it away in his mind, able to recall every detail at a moment’s notice, to the point that the chart Roger was making notes on would be for later doctors, not for the ER team. At the edges of her vision Anna saw black tarmac turn into the marble effect veneered flooring that ran through the ER and almost every other hospital, school and government building in the western world. During those moments Carl was processing what he had been told, and then he began to give orders.

"Right, let's carry on as planned. Get her into Trauma 4 and get her in the TMV. I want a central line in addition to those bilateral IVs, and I want wide bore access in one of her legs, ready for extracorporeal warming. Let's get an NG tube inserted too, bi-directional for the gastric lavage. Let's get a core temp before we consider surgical intervention though." Carl briefly held his fingers against Shona's femoral pulse point, his wrist resting against Anna's calf. "Good pulse with compressions Anna, keep it up, but let's also get a Lucas ready, this could be a long one people!" He said, a tone to his voice that instilled confidence and re-doubled their determination.

They were going to get their patient back. Shona, Anna reminded herself, looking at the girl beneath her, forcing her name into the front of her mind. She had a cute face, even with pale skin and blue lips, that much was clear. The tape holding the ET tube also pulled at the corner of her mouth, forming a grimace, as though she could feel each brutal compression that Anna delivered. Not that Anna was deterred. She was going to do everything she could to get Shona back. To see those lips pink instead of blue. Smiling instead of a forced grimace. She wasn't alone in those thoughts. The whole team was feeling the same way as they guided the gurney into the Trauma Wing and crashed through the doors into Trauma 4.

#Medical Drama #Cpr #defib #resus writing #Anna Swift #Intubation #dark cardiophilia

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angelsswirl · 4 years ago

Text

Been Through

Chapter 9: I let you get the best of me

*WARNING* This chapter is rated Mature for sexual content!!

You are the sole person I've been searching for. Yeah you are. I think I’ll go crazy thinking of you.

You stood at the door impatiently. You had been staring at your front door for twenty minutes now. Willing it to sound with the telltale knock that she was here.

You had texted her something along the lines of 'hurry it's an emergency' and she said she'd be here right away. So. Where the hell was she?

Didn't she get it? You were aching and throbbing. You were shaking and vibrating. You were in heat. And she was just letting you stew in it like some....stew.

Time is of the essence on days like today.

After another twenty minutes (actually it's only five minutes) she arrived. You opened the door before she even got a chance to knock. You could just sort of tell she was there.

Her eyes widened in surprise, "Whoa. Where's the fire?"

Now would be a great time to say something cheesy like "In my pants" or something like that, but instead you settle for jumping at her and kissing her.

She kissed you back, even if she was surprised and just a little bit scared. That went on for a few more seconds before she seemed to get her wits about her.

She broke the kiss with a curious smile. Then, after actually looking you in the eye and taking in her surroundings, she realized something.

"God Y/N, are you in heat?" She already knew the answer. You smelled amazing. Almost like cinnamon, fresh laundry and a whole lot of home.

"You're so smart." You said sarcastically, just a bit mad about the not kissing anymore thing, but she needed to have some things cleared up first.

She had to ask her questions now because once you were really immersed in the throws of your heat, there wouldn't be much of any coherency on your part for a while.

"And you want me to help you through it. Do you want to be my girlfriend?"

"Yes, Lisa."

Lisa placed her fists on her hips and puffed out her chest a little, "Cool."

"Really? I'm trying to have hot sex with you and you choose now to be a dork?"

"Hey-"

You latched back on to Lisa's lips with a deep groan. She chuckled into it softly.

"Where's your kid?"

"Your kid is with my mom."

Lisa's eyes widened in panic,"Your mom? Oh no. Does she know we're doing this? She hates me."

You were three seconds away from petulantly stomping your foot like your four year old. None of that mattered right now. You were in heat for fuck's sake. You glared at her.

"I know, but stop jumping me for a second."

Clearly Lisa had no idea what it was like to be in heat. Calming down for a second was just about out of the question.

"I'm going to text Jisoo and tell her to distract your mom for a little longer. Your mom loves Jisoo. It'll work."

Lisa fiddled with her phone for a few minutes, before throwing it onto the coffee table. She looked back at you with a smirk.

"When the hell did you get naked?!"

You didn't quite know when you got naked either. You shrugged. It had been necessary. You felt like you were burning from the inside out.

Lisa looked around the room. There was a couch nearest to you, but she be damned if she let your first time (sober) be on your white leather couch. She also had a feeling you'd kill her for that when you came to.

You blinked lazily up at Lisa. She held out a hand to you, then set about practically dragging you into your bedroom.

Once you were situated on the bed, you dragged your hands down your body. You bad been ready to get this show on the road since you had woke up in a cold sweat that morning.

Lisa was practically fighting with her clothing to get it off of her. It was only a tank top and sweatpants, what she had been wearing when you texted her, but apparently the difficulty was still high.

Once she was finally free of all articles she set her gaze back on you.

"You weren't just messing with me when I asked about your heat." She gestured to you with a head nod. Your hand had been exploring between your own legs.

You shrugged, still only mildly aware of anything other than the pleasure you were practically begging to experience, "I may embellish the truth but I don't lie to you. I can't."

Lisa ran her hand up the length of your side. You pressed herself into the cooling touch as much as you could.

"You're not going to change your mind make me stop are you?" Lisa asked. She was smirking, but she was definitely being completely serious.

You couldn't stop her even if you wanted to at this point.

You shook your head a little wildly, "No. Now, please fuck me."

Lisa chuckled softly, "Yes, unnie."

You've never rolled your eyes so hard at something in your life. You were only 2 years older than her, and she chose now to remind you.

Maybe, you should change your mind.

Though, that thought was all but thrown out the window when Lisa nipped at your straining neck.

"Lisa." You whimpered.

Lisa hummed, she slid up to your ear, a direct contrast to her left hand which was slithering down your stomach to replace your hand between your legs.

You convulsed in response to Lisa's fingers coming into soft contact with your center.

"Please." You panted. Lisa hummed again and you could practically feel it.

Her lips grazed over your ear teasingly. She easily batted away your hand and circled her fingers.

"You're like really pretty."

Lisa occupied her opposite hand with trailing her fingers over one of your nipples, drawing a small gasp from you.

You keened, your left hand reaching to cling onto Lisa's shoulder, urging her to provide you with more.

Lisa's lips smashed down onto yours.

And you finally gave up that last bit of control you had been clinging onto. What purpose would the ruse hold at this point. This point where you're naked and aching underneath her.

Eventually, Lisa picked up the pace.

Her fingers left the tenderness of your clit to instead meet your entrance. Her index finger slipped almost embarrassingly easy into you.

You moaned loudly, you back arching enough to push you into Lisa's chest lightly.

"You're soaked." She continued to pump her finger in and out slowly. Pleasantly distracted by the pleasure playing across your face.

You were pretty much gasping now.

"More. Please."

Another finger of the alpha's slipped into you, the resulting whimper is the loudest one yet and just as telling as the rest.

She pulled out then pushed back in slowly, her palm pressing on your swollen center.

Lisa increased her speed even without your urging. She just knew what you needed and when.

Your mewls and whimpers grew in pitch and frequency. Hips bucked up into Lisa's hand on just about every thrust.

"God!"

You released into Lisa's hand soon after. Eased over the edge by her light nips where your neck and shoulder meet.

After taking a much needed break to catch breath, you pulled Lisa closer to you and in for a impatient kiss.

Lisa settled herself between your legs, lining herself up with your entrance. She kept a close eye out for any signs of discomfort from you.

You took in a sharp breath. Most of your lip caught between her teeth, as Lisa pushed into you.

You both groan simultaneously.

It was obvious that neither of you would last long. Not with all that waiting you've been doing, and all the teasing you've been putting Lisa through.

Her hips picked up speed on their own accord. Your other hand came to grip at Lisa's shoulders in response.

"Faster, Lisa." Lisa agreed easily, squaring up her hips and picking up the pace. She pounded into you below her, moaning deeply as she did.

You stretched her neck as she released suddenly, a by product of your arching back. Lisa groaned lowly.

The delicate skin of your neck doesn't break when Lisa marked it. Any pain that you would have felt is quickly overcome by the relief you feel of your heat subsiding for now.

You clenched around Lisa, causing her to finally fall over the edge. You're thrown into another gentler spasm at the feeling of Lisa spilling inside of you.

She carefully flipped so you were resting comfortably on her chest.

"I'm proud of us. Didn't think we had that in us."

You rolled your eyes at, "You're such a dork."

"But I'm your dork."

"Fortunately or unfortunately."

"Hey!"

You were both silent for a few moments. Then you started speaking.

"I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"For making this way harder than it should have been. I love you, that should have been enough." You tucked your face into her shoulder.

"You don't work like that, and I get it. You had a lot to think about. If this had been easy, I don't think it would have worked out."

You nodded slowly. That heat fog slowly leaking back into your vision.

"I guess you're right."

"Better late than never."

A few seconds later, you're back into the throws of your heat. You hoped Lisa brought a water bottle or something, because you fully planned on completely depleting her strength.

~~~

Lisa was willing to bet two things. The first one: You were definitely trying to attempt revenge on her during your heat. Either for calling you 'unnie' or for dropping you when she attempted to place you into the bathtub. In her defense, you were slippery from all the sweating you two had been doing during your activities.

The second thing she was willing to bet: You were pregnant.

She had no proof other than seeing you every day for the last three weeks.

It was a benefit of being mated. She could kind of just tell. You hadn't been having any mood swings or weird cravings and you weren't throwing up...yet...but you had been extra clingy with both Lisa and Lily.

You would cuddle under as many blankets as you could find into Lisa's side, and Lily on your lap.

Yep, she was about 89% sure you were pregnant. But she'd just wait for you to find out yourself. It was more entertaining that way.

She eyed you curiously from her place across from you at the marble island in your kitchen.

You looked up with a curious eyebrow, "What?"

"...Why me?"

You blinked in surprise at the question. Then sighed, "Remember when we met? It was just you and me. I was supposed to be Jisoo's English teacher, but you had suddenly decided that you needed one too. You had somehow found me before everyone else and wasted all of your free time getting to know me. That's why."

"Because I talked to you first?"

"No. Because you went out of your way to talk to me first. I think it was only a week before you had tricked me into falling in love with you." You smiled fondly at the memory.

"Then why'd you go out with Jennie?"

That was a good question. You weren't entirely sure of the answer, but you knew at least part of it, "She asked me out, and you didn't. I said yes because what the hell and things just went on from there. But what does any of that matter now. I don't want to build a family with Jennie. I'm not in love with her. I want that with you." You were sure of that.

"I want that with you too." Lisa said softly. You bounded around the counter, so you were standing in front of her.

"Good, because I'm pretty sure that little performance we put on a few weeks ago gave Lily a sibling."

Lisa faked a surprised gasp, "What?! Your pregnant? Never could I have known!"

"Hop off it. You've been looking at me funny for the last week. You probably knew before I did." You playfully swatted at her shoulder.

"Yeah, I had a feeling. But hey that's a good thing. Now, you're really stuck with me."

"Another successful trick on your part."

Lisa smiled brightly, "I love you."

"I love you, too."

#been through #blackpink fanfic #lisa fanfic #lisa x reader #jesssica's fanfic

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xiaomoxu · 4 years ago

Text

Xu Mo - Painting Gallery Date (Translation) Part 3 and 4

SPOILER ALERT!!

This date from CN server which hasn't been released on EN server yet. Might contains some spoiler.

Brace yourself for angst moment from Lucien (as usual)☹

I'm doing this translation for personal reason, so I'm sorry if there's some mistranslation. Kindly tell me if you found some :) feel free to read it~ ^^

I used Lucien CN name on it, Xu Mo.

Read previous part here

PART 3

Xu Mo and I went to an oil painting experience hall called "Film Oil Painting Gallery".

The aroma of coffee and milk tea is floating in the air, and the hydrogen and hydrogen echoes in the mellow jazz music. The drawing boards are placed in an orderly manner, and people are immersed in their own small universe.

There are dream catchers and many small creative ornaments on the wall. But what attracts me most is the works painted by people who came here before.

The fluorescent beach under the stars, the idling ballet dancers in the night, and the whales rolling up in the deep sea. Some paintings also have a text written on them.

I scanned these paintings curiously, Xu Mo silently followed behind me, looking at me with a smile.

Suddenly, I stopped in front of a painting.

The paintings show Paris at different times. Sunny, rainy, day, and night. From cafes to the banks of the Seine, famous and unknown streetscapes are covered with painted paper.

In the lower left corner of the painting, there is a small poem written.

MC: "I want to live with you, sharing endless dusk and endless bells in a small town."

MC: What a beautiful poem, I always feel where I have read it..

Xu Mo: It is a poem by Russian poetess Tsvetayeva.

Xu Mo walked to my side and turned his eyes on the painting to me, with a trace of inquiry in his drooping eyes.

Xu Mo: You like it a lot?

MC: I....

Store Manager: Hello, are you here to paint?

The voice of a middle-aged man interrupted my conversation with Xu Mo.

Xu Mo nodded to the store manager.

Xu Mo: Yes. This painting is very special, we want to know the background of its creation.

Store Manager: Of course! When I first saw this painting, I was just as curious as you guys. Then I asked its author and he generously shared with me the story behind it.

Store Manager: He said that he once met a girl in Paris, and the two chatted from day to night. This painting records the place they passed.

MC: It seems like the plot in the movie...

Store Manager: Yes. Unfortunately, the ending is not as perfect as in the movie.

Store Manager: The girls already have a marriage contract, and they agreed that if they decide to start the relationship, they will meet in front of Notre Dame in Paris at dusk the next day.

MC: But they didn't meet in the end, did they?*

(* this is the edited translation)

Store Manager: Oh, what a pity

Just as I was feeling sad about this story, Xu Mo, who had been silent, raised his hand and rubbed my hair lightly.

Xu Mo: Don't be sad.

Xu Mo: Painting is a tool for memory, but it also has the power of forgetting.

Xu Mo: At the moment he painted, perhaps, he was ready to say goodbye.

Store Manager: Yes, miss, don't have to be so sad, you should be happy to draw with your boyfriend today!

Store Manager: We have special boxes for couples here, let me take you there!

MC: I....

Xu Mo: Alright, then I will trouble you.

Before I could finish my words, Xu Mo interrupted me.

Following the manager, we came to a closed box. He poured two cups of tea for us, said that he could come to him anytime if there was a problem, and then closed the door and left.

MC: This person is really not sloppy.

Xu Mo: Okay, let's sit down first.

Sitting on the sofa and looking at the neatly arranged painting tools, I couldn't help asking my questions.

MC: Why are you taking me here?

Xu Mo: Remember our agreement?

My mind started to rewind quickly, but I couldn't remember what Xu Mo's agreement was.

Xu Mo: Forgot about it so quickly? But I keep it in my heart.

這麼快就忘了? 我可是一直好好的放在心上。

Xu Mo pointed to the paintbrush.

It suddenly dawned on me that I remembered the previous agreement.

There's 2 options for this:

A. Does it mean to teach me the convention of drawing?

B. Is it a promise to draw together?

Option A

MC: Does it mean to teach me the convention of drawing?

Xu Mo smiled and nodded.

Xu Mo: I have seen all your paintings.

Xu Mo: It seems that you don't need me as a teacher, you also have enough talent to understand it yourself.

The thought that all the "ghost-like" paintings in the sketchbook fell into his eyes, I couldn't help but put my face in a shy manner.

Xu Mo took my hand away and wrapped it in his warm palm.

Option B

MC: Is it a promise to draw together?

Xu Mo: Yes.

MC: I thought that when we draw on the sketchbook, we have already fulfilled the agreement

Xu Mo: I will do what I have agreed with you.

He looked at me with a smile, his eyes soft and firm, which made ripples in my heart.

Xu Mo: What does that puzzle look like? We can draw another one

It turned out that this is why he brought me to the oil painting studio?

He has not forgotten the agreement between us, and he has always remembered that I lost the puzzle.

MC: It is a puzzle of a forest, well, it may be more difficult to draw...

I suddenly remembered that Xu Mo once said that he can only copy, not create.

MC: Or forget it, we can draw something...

Xu Mo: I have a way, but I don't know if you will like it.

I immediately nodded like a chick.

MC: Well, I will love it!

Xu Mo rubbed my hair indifferently, then picked up a pencil and drew on the paper intently and earnestly. The nib rubbed against the surface of the paper and made a rustle.

I couldn't help looking at his soft and clear side face. In the narrow space, I could only hear our amplified breathing. After a while, the outline of the painting became clear.

MC: Horse? No, it has a sharp horn on its forehead...

MC: It's a Unicorn!

A mirror-like lake, thorny roads, and unicorns in the forest. Behind it, among the dense trees, a dark shadow could be vaguely glimpsed.

Xu Mo: According to legend, the unicorn lives in the forest. It is a noble and beautiful creature. Few people have seen it.

MC: So it appears in the picture, representing the depths in the forest...

Xu Mo smiled and acquiesced to what I said.

MC: I heard that the horns of unicorns have unique healing powers.

Xu Mo: Yes. So despite the fear of its power, there are countless hunters who dream of falling into their trap one day.

I picked up the pen and added a bright moon to the upper left corner.

The bright moonlight leaked from the branches, casting a dim and soft amount of light, illuminating the road in front of the unicorn.

MC: It won't feel lonely now!

With the moon as its company, even if it is faced with greedy hunters and unknown road ahead, it will not be so scared.

Xu Mo turned his head and stared at me. There seemed to be a sea of clouds rolling in his eyes. In an instant, the clouds dispersed, revealing a light.

Xu Mo: Hm, not lonely anymore.

I blushed a little by his burning eyes, so I hurriedly shifted my sights.

MC: Leー let's color it!

Xu Mo on the side laughed lightly.

Xu Mo: Then I'll trouble Miss MC.

MC: Huh? Don't you paint?

I have been painting just now, but someone does not look at the painting, but instead looks elsewhere.

MC: I....

Xu Mo: Now it's my turn.

MC: You...

Xu Mo squinted his eyes slightly, with a smile on the corners of his lips.

MC: Alright..

I confessed my fate and compromised, after all, I was "losing''

For the rest of the time, I am seriously coloring the painting. It's just that whenever I bring up a color and want Xu Mo to give some advice, he will nod and say that's it.

Am I a painting genius?

I quietly dropped the color of my own on the paper, putting aside all worries, as if all the rhythm would slow down with the pen tip.

MC: It's done!!!

Xu Mo: Be carefulー

I was happy for only two seconds. I knocked the paint to the ground because of the excessive movement. There are yellow spots splashing on the finished painting.

MC: Why is it like this...

The bright yellow is particularly conspicuous. I felt regretful for a while, and it was already at the last moment, but because of my clumsiness, I gave up all my work.

I can't help but think of today's experience. It always seems to be a little bit short of it, and it seems that it is almost complete.

Xu Mo: MC, raise your head.

A warm chest pressed against me behind me, and a familiar breath brushed my ears.

I don't know when he have stood behind me.

He leaned down and wrapped my hand holding the brush with a warm, dry palm. The other hand went around my arm and stayed at the waist.

The breath of green grass surrounds me after the rain. Such an intimate action made my body stiff, heat climbed up to my cheeks, and my hands shook unconsciously.

Xu Mo: Don't move.

He took my hand with the brush, and dipped in yellow paint flying on the paper.

The yellow dots that were an eyesore just now have turned into warm fireflies surrounding the unicorn under our pen.

Xu Mo: No matter what the outside world is, hope it will be guided by fireflies.

PART 4

The store manager was amazed after seeing our painting, and hoped to keep it, like the paintings we saw on the wall before, for more people to appreciate.

Xu Mo left the decision to me. After a fierce inner struggle, I decided to keep the painting.

MC: We will come again next time for a better picture!

Xu Mo: Alright.

Xu Mo's tone and smile were very soft. Affected by him, the corners of my mouth curled up unconsciously.

Just as we were about to leave, we saw the clerk taking care of the oil painting.

MC: Speaking of which, the light here is so dark, it is also to better preserve the oil paintings.

Xu Mo: Well, long-term exposure to direct sunlight will cause oil painting to fade.

Xu Mo's voice suddenly lowered, and his tone became colder.

Xu Mo: Beautiful things are very fragile, so be protect carefully.

Looking at the picture of a street scene in Paris, I couldn't help but ask.

MC: You said, how long has Notre Dame de Paris existed?

Xu Mo did not answer immediately, but just looked at me and waited for me to continue.

MC: For such a long time, it has been silently guarding Paris and watching all the living beings.

MC: Remember the story told by the hero in the movie we watched together?

MC: The German soldier holding the detonator admired the beauty of Notre Dame de Paris, which prevented him from pressing the button...

MC: Beautiful things are not just objects to be protected, they also have the power to influence others.

I raised my head and looked directly at Xu Mo's eyes. The atmosphere that was light and pleasant just now suddenly became tense.

I can't even tell myself why I should be so serious on this question. I just vaguely feel that his answer is very important to us.

MC: Just like these paintings in the oil painting gallery, although they are not made by masters, they have a unique charm because of the touching stories behind them.

MC: Although Paris is beautiful, people who love each other are what makes it more beautiful.

Xu Mo stared at me quietly, without speaking, but the temperature in his pupils gradually became infected.

After a while, he raised his hand and pinned my scattered hair behind his ears. Then said in a soft toneー

Xu Mo: What's beautiful is, that reflects the world...your eyes

Leaving the oil painting studio, we returned to the noisy street. The dazzling sunlight made me squint, but in just a few hours, it felt like a world away.

Xu Mo couldn't help but pick up my hanging hand. He didn't use any force, but he couldn't resist it.

Xu Mo: This time, don't refuse me anymore.

Feeling the temperature from the palm of my hand, my heartbeat speeded up unconsciously, and the redness quickly stained my cheeks.

Whether it’s shy or sweaty palms, even though it’s always a little short of perfection, as long as I hold this person’s hand, I have the courage to face everything.

Just like a jigsaw puzzle, we will fill in those vacancies little by little.

MC: Xu Moー

I took out a glass bottle with a puzzle in it.

MC: Sorry I lied.

MC: In fact, after talking with you on the phone, I found the puzzle. But because I wanted to meet you, I didn't tell you...

After hearing what I said, a hint of surprise flashed on Xu Mo's face, but it was quickly replaced by a clear smile.

Xu Mo: It seems that I was too careless and trusted a little liar.

MC: This is a gift from Lisianthus! Of course, you can also regard it as my apologetic

Xu Mo took the glass bottle in my hand, with a smile in his mouth and eyes. (CG Karma also included)

He raised the vial to his eyes. The glass bottle in the sun showed a colorful light, and a yellow gleam was reflected in his eyes.

Xu Mo's pupils widened in an instant.

MC: It's Firefly.

MC: When I saw this puzzle in the store before, I thought it was very similar to the jungle we had visited before, so I bought it...

Xu Mo's eyes were overflowing with tenderness, and the smile on his lips was warmer than the spring sun.

Xu Mo: Very beautiful.

Maybe the light at that time was very soft, maybe the breeze raised his broken hair and rippled in my heart for a month.

I uttered the words that were hidden in my heart

MC: The oil painting may fade, but memory will not.

MC: I would like to put together a jigsaw puzzle, turning our memories into color.

I looked at Xu Mo and said firmly.

MC: No matter how far you go, Firefly will guide you.

Suddenly, everything was silent, and we all reflected each other in our eyes.

Then, I remembered something.

MC: Ah! I forgot to write on our painting just now

Xu Mo raised his eyebrows, and then chuckled out as if not holding back.

He came closer and scratched my nose with his fingers.

Xu Mo: You.

Xu Mo: Do you have anything to write?

MC: No, it’s just that it’s more like ceremony. After all, it’s a work we finished together

MC: Moreover, I am also very curious about what you will write on the painting.

Under the dazzling sunlight, Xu Mo smiled softly.

It was a smile he had never shown before. A bit childish, but unstoppable determination

He held the glass bottle in his hand tightly.

Secretly rejoicing that earlier today, looking at the sunlight outside the window, thinking of the girl who couldn't let go, he finally made the decision to go to the appointment as scheduled.

Is it more painful for those who wait, or is it more painful for those who make people wait?

Fortunately, it did not live up to this rare good weather.

Xu Mo grabbed the document bag in his hand. Let her see these next time.

Xu Mo: I can tell you now.

He looked deeply at the girl before him.

It is like turning her appearance together with this intoxicating spring scene into a beautiful fixation of time and space, a moving stop, imprinting in my heart forever.

Xu Mo: "I want from all the times, from all the nights."

Xu Mo: "Retake you from all the golden banners, from all the swordsー"

Xu Mo: "You have to hold your breath."

-END-

#mlqc spoilers #mlqc translation #mr love spoilers #mr love translation #mlqc lucien #mlqc xu mo #mr love lucien #mr love xu mo #mr love date #mldd date #mldd lucien #mldd translation

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rosaline-kei · 5 years ago

Text

Disclaimer:I do not own Shingeki no Kyojin / Attack on Titan nor its characters.

Title: Playboy no more - EreMika Fanfic ; OneShot

Synopsis: Mikasa wins the heart of a playboy who never knew he’d have wanted something so committed with someone like her.

Requested by: @eremika-forever12

Rated: T

Pairings: Mikasa Ackerman / Eren Jaeger

Read it also on / Please Leave a Review at: my Ao3 / FF net (might post there soon.)

A/N: never written this eremika trope before considering as the attack on titan series continues, Eren’s character is further explored and his decisions/character development makes me unable to picture him as stuff like a playboy. But hey, I’m open to trying I guess haha. Albeit admittedly I hated how this turned out as i lost motivation and yeah :/ My apologies dear requester; i hope you’ll enjoy anyway.

Mikasa hadn’t expect for her first kiss to turn out like this, in this sort of accidental predicament, with this person, with her on top of him—literally—on the ground.

Her lips were pressed against the school’s infamous playboy who had his eyes opened widely at her, filled with surprise at how direct she was��but more than anything, his cheeks resembled a ripened tomato while his brain was still processing the entire situation; of the fact that she—someone that he thought that not even someone as smooth as him would ever be able to get her to fall for him—kissed him.

But he wasn’t that dense to not know that it had been an accident, with her tripping, falling; falling onto him.

What he didn’t know, though, was that she hadn’t just fall on him; she had fell for him too.

It started when Mikasa Ackerman transferred to Shiganshina High.

She was fortunate to know someone from that school. That particular someone was a boy named Armin Arlert who just so happened to go to the same math tuition as her.

‘I’ll meet you at the cafeteria before class starts!’ He had texted her, leaving her to wait quietly in the cafeteria where a few students ate their breakfast or were burning the midnight oil as they dipped and curved their pens in a messy rush, desperately trying their utmost best to finish it before the bell rings.

One particular boy caught her attention, though. Sitting a few seats away was a boy who had chestnut coloured hair and green eyes that could’ve come across as striking if only she had a closer view. He wore a pitch-black leather jacket which gave Mikasa the impression that he was those typical boisterous gangsters that went around threatening people to surrender either their lunch money or answers for homework to him. Next to him was a blonde-haired girl with eyes that looked like a lovestruck puppy when he had his arm wrapped around her, and if she had to guess, they were probably flirting.

She looked away shyly, feeling like her eyes shouldn’t linger at what should be a private moment in her opinion. This early in the morning? She thought, sighing. She had heard wonderful things about Shiganshina High and its students from Armin—but it seemed that impression would soon change if there were more ‘bad boys’ like him roaming freely.

“Mikasa!” Armin called, waving his hand to get her attention before approaching and then sitting next to her. “Sorry for being a little late.” He chuckled nervously as he scratched the back of his head.

“No worries.” She assured with a warm smile. “Its good to see a familiar face… especially since I’m the new kid.” She sighed, transferring in the middle of the year wasn’t her cup of tea. But due to family circumstances, she didn’t have much of a choice and being an obedient and filial daughter, she complied without much complaint.

“Yeah. Oh and—” Armin’s cheerful look soon soured into something disgusted that confused Mikasa for a moment. He didn’t seem to be directing that disgust to her, though, but a couple that sat not too far away demonstrating PDA that Armin could only wish he could unsee; so did Mikasa, who turned out of curiosity, to flush and turn back in regret. “A-Are… all students here like th—”

“No.” He groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Mostly him… that’s Eren Jaeger…”

“Oh.”

“…and its sad to say, he’s a close friend of mine over here.”

“Oh—wait, what?” Mikasa’s eyes widened in bewilderment. She knew Armin enough to be sure that these two boys were most likely living in two different worlds. She found it a little hard to believe that the both of them were best pals, especially after that revolting look he had when watching him making out with who she taught was his girlfriend.

Suddenly, she felt Armin’s hands gripping on both her shoulders, startling her slightly. “A-Armin?”

“Listen to me, Mikasa.” He took a deep breath. “No matter what you do, do not fall for him or his flirtation. Not when… he’s going through this irking playboy phase.”

“P-Playboy?” She stuttered, in disbelief that he was friends with a playboy… and more than anything, she was flustered when he even brought up the idea of her falling for him.

While she was a teenager, Mikasa was yet to have any romantic experience. And by no means did she plan to rush into it. More than anything, her priorities were her studies. Yes, it may be boring. But if she wanted to get into one of the top universities, she didn’t have much of a choice.

“Yes. Playboy.” He shook his head in utter disappointment, as if he was a father that failed to bring up his son right. “He’s a… childhood friend. I don’t know what happened along the way but he became a playboy and I can only hope one day he will stop.” He said.

All the girls who got involved with him knew of his playboy nature, and for the most part, they didn’t care so much of how he would go from one to another when he was bored. Most of them knew getting involved with him meant no commitment.

“What makes you think I’ll fall—”

“It’s just a warning. In case.” He sighed. “He has a… way with his words. Only a few people aren’t swayed by it.” He shrugged. “But he’s a good friend, so give him a chance. For the most part, I already told him about you and to leave you alone. I don’t know if he’ll listen, though.”

Mikasa had never seen Armin so done with life (or more specifically, the wild, playboy heart of Eren) until now. It was amusing, but a little worrying.

“If he bothers you, just tell me, okay?” The bell rang at the same time Mikasa nodded her head. “Yeah… don’t worry. I’m not looking for romance, anyway.” She assured.

Besides… I don’t think I’d ever fall for someone like him.

“So, you’re the Mikasa Ackerman huh?” Eren grabbed a chair, sitting himself right in front of her desk with both his arms invading a small space on her desk to rest. “The girl Armin told me about?” He queried curiously. It was break-time now, and the first time he approached her.

“Eren.” Armin couldn’t believe he had the audacity to slide right in with eyes that screamed his intentions right in front of him. “Don’t.”

“Gee, Armin, chill. I’m not doing anything.” Eren raised his hands, innocently surrendering for a brief moment before his eyes found himself fixating with her greyish hues.

“Yes… I am.” She mumbled, her own pair of eyes staring right at his to realise that yes, they were indeed as striking as she had thought. And on top of that, they had a sort of allure that were trying to draw her in more and more, trying to get her hypnotised and immersed. However, before she could, she looked away right back at her book.

Eren smirked. “Eh? Why are you looking away?” He asked with a tone so gentle, but it sounded awfully playful. His hands raised, two fingers walking close to her hand that fidgeted with a pen. “I don’t want to have a beauty like you hating me…” He mumbled, his hands finding its way to hold hers softly, causing Mikasa to flinch, let go of the pen and snap her head up right at him.

“B-beauty?” She stuttered. That was a first.

“Yea—ow!” He screeched, and let go of her hand while turning behind to see Armin with a rolled-up paper that was just used to smack his head.

“Eren.” He cautioned again, and it amused Mikasa that the brunette that had acted all slick and brave around her was suddenly looking a little fearful and nervous when he saw Armin’s stern, furious and protective look. It was a stark contrast to the bad boy image she originally had of him earlier, and she couldn’t help but let out a chuckle that didn’t come across unnoticed to both of them.

“Why are you laughing?” Eren huffed, sounding rather defeated before he stood up, hands shoving itself in his pocket as he turned away embarrassedly. “gee Armin, ruining the mome—” He saw the blonde rolling the paper tighter and shot his hand up in defeat. “Okay, okay! Ah, whatever! I’m late for a date with some other brunette anyway.” He grumbled before walking off, casting one final glance at Mikasa. “See ya around, Mika.” He nodded before he left.

“ ‘Mika’?” Mikasa murmured to herself, before meeting a pair of blue eyes that looked at her with both concern and disappointment.

“…What?”

Armin crossed his arms. “Do not fall for him.” He said before slumping onto the seat that Eren sat on earlier. “I saw you blushing.”

And the pink rose back up to her cheeks when Armin brought it up. “I… It’s just a first for me. Someone… flirting with me and calling me… that.” She answered shyly, and Armin sighed. “Well, you’re not the first nor will you be the last person he ever calls that.” He spoke, “I just don’t want you to get hurt. Those who actually, genuinely fall for him get hurt when faced with rejection. You heard him, he’s going on a ‘date’ with some brunette when he was making out with some blonde earlier…”

Mikasa nodded. Armin is right, she thought. He is a playboy… do I really want to…?

Besides. She reasoned with herself. I just met him. I don’t… really like him in that sense. He just caught me off guard with that… look and his tone. I feel so silly.

“I understand.” Mikasa sighed. “On a different note, it’s hard to believe the two of you are friends… does he leave you alone for his ‘dates’?” She asked, a small concern rising in her.

“Nah. He hanged with me more often before you came. He’s just ‘freer’ now since you’re here to keep me company.” He laughed lightly, “He’s more loyal as a friend, trust me.” He paused for a bit, and then sighed. “I hope he’d make time for you, as in, talk to you under a more friendly circumstance. He’s different, as a friend.”

And what Armin said was proved to be true two days later when he found himself sick at home with the flu.

Aside from Armin, she hadn’t made any other friends since she was still new. (She wasn’t sure if she could count Eren, since she didn’t really talk to him considering he was too pre-occupied with his ‘dates’).

She found herself huddled alone at a quiet corner in the school’s library during their break, with textbooks scattered around the table she occupied as she did her work.

The last thing she expected was for a brunette to come crashing in, legs crossed, with a smile, sitting right next to her. “Yo.” He greeted, startling Mikasa a little who gave him an odd look.

“…Hey?” She greeted back, confused by his presence. She could’ve sworn he was fooling with a girl in the morning, and had plans to continue later during breaktime. So, she hadn’t expected him to be here, and Eren took notice. “Am I not welcomed?” He asked.

“No… its not that.” She looked away, back at the annoying question she had been stuck on for a little too long. “I just… thought you had a ‘date’.”

“Eh, things don’t go as planned.” Was the only answer he gave her, and Mikasa didn’t care enough to pry. Little did she know, he cancelled his plans to keep her company upon finding out Armin was sick with the flu. While Armin didn’t request that of him, he took it upon himself because he didn’t want her to feel lonely on her first few days in school.

And while they didn’t interact a lot, he considered her a friend (even after the little flirtatious stunt he tried to pull) since she was a friend of Armin’s. She seemed like a nice girl, anyway.

“Oh.” She said, and Eren noticed that she seemed a little tensed, as if she were leaving her walls and guard up. He couldn’t blame her. He was sure Armin gave her long lectures of his… playboy nature. And while that side of him did want to play with her, since it had been a while when he last ‘dated’ the studious type, he was sure Armin would kill him.

And most of all, Eren Jaeger didn’t want to get involved romantically with girls who sought actual commitment. He didn’t want to be a heartbreaker. But at the same time, he couldn’t stay still.

“Don’t worry, I’m not going to hit on you.” Eren sighed, and Mikasa looked at him, confused.

“Why’d you hit me…?”

Eren looked at her, amused at her confusion, and laughed as quietly as he could since they were in a library. “It means flirt.”

“O-Oh…” She looked away embarrassedly, and it took every ounce of effort for Eren not to continue teasing because heaven forbid the terrors Armin would bring upon him if even thought of leading her on too much.

“Yeah. Armin would kill me. I still have my youth ahead, can’t let that happen.” He said. “On a different note, is this what you do in your free time?” He asked, and his tone ticked off Mikasa a little; it felt a little insulting. “Just study? Even when you’re with Armin, I still see you studying with him sometimes.”

It was something people back in her old school often said to her before calling her things like boring and plain jane. It ticked her off, but she ignored them. Besides, she had a small friend group there to hang around anyway.

“I want to get into one of the top universities.” She defended herself, even though Eren wasn’t exactly attacking her. “So, if I can study then… yeah.”

“No need to get defensive.” Eren assured, “I understand that sentiment. Armin’s kinda like that too.” He spoke. “But you know, you can let loose every now and then.”

Mikasa raised a brow. “Let loose like you? Mr playboy.”

Now, Eren felt insulted. But then again, touché. “That’s not what I mean.” He shook his head and huffed. “Gee, what happened to that shy, easily flustered girl I saw the other day?”

Mikasa flinched, and found herself turning into that easily flustered girl again when Eren brought up how she was so easily swayed by his little compliment. “…Do you want me to call Armin?”

Now, Eren flinched and his shoulders tensed and the next thing Mikasa knew, his eyes looked at her apologetically and desperately while his tone weakened, sounding defeated and pleading. “Please, don’t.” He begged. “He’ll kill me with that rolled up paper.”

“I find that hard to believe.” Mikasa chuckled lightly, “…Underneath that bad-boy and playboy persona, you seem…” She paused for a bit, and then laughed quietly to herself at the first word that came to her mind.

“Seem like what?” His brows furrowed.

“Oh, nothing…”

He grew a little childish—a side only a few got to see. “Eh?? Don’t leave me hanging like that!” His voice was slowly raising and Mikasa instantly hushed him.

“We’re in a library, remember?” She reminded, and noticed him pouting slightly. “Yeah, yeah…” he grumbled, “What are you studying now, anyway?”

Mikasa’s focus switched back to her paper. “Chemistry… I’m not too good at it.”

“Really?” Eren said, as he moved a little closer to take a peek at the question she was stuck at. “Ah… the mol concept. It’s hard but… I can help you with this question. The answer is 3.8 mol, right?”

“Yeah…” Mikasa sounded a little surprised, resulting Eren to frown a little as he could guess what she was thinking.

“Look, not all bad boys or playboys are dumb-bells.” He huffed. “I happen to know—”

“No, no its not that…” Mikasa resisted a chuckle. “Armin just… told me you were failing.”

“Only in literature! Who the heck understands olden English language! I mean no offense to Shakespeare—”

“Shhh! Eren, we’re in a library remember?” It was only then Eren noticed the glares he was receiving from the people in the library, especially from the bookworms and librarians… and some of the girls who he ‘dated’.

Hell, did he have a bad sense of timing.

And then he heard a soft chuckle, turning around he saw Mikasa laughing lightly at him again and somehow, he couldn’t find it in himself to interrupt her again. And it was not because of the glares that were still shot at him.

Perhaps it was his playboy nature getting the best of him, but… he found her a little cute when she smiled and laughed.

One thing happened after the other, and Eren and Mikasa found themselves having study sessions together, with Eren helping her with chemistry and Mikasa helping him with literature.

Armin had been a little suspicious of this turn in events, since the last thing he thought that playboy would ever do in his free time was to have an actual study date, without the date aspect in it. However, upon joining a few of their study sessions at either Eren’s or Mikasa’s home, he realised that Eren could in fact, keep his hands and (in his opinion, sometimes cringey) smooth-talk to himself. It was surprising, definitely.

Although, it didn’t mean Eren didn’t tease Mikasa every now and then (especially when Armin wasn’t around to smack him).

And it didn’t mean his actual ‘dates’ came to a halt, there were a few times he skipped out studying and went on to have some fun.

But as days went by, unknowingly, those dates started to come to gradual decrease when he found Mikasa’s company… genuinely enjoyable—enjoyable in a way that no other girl gave him.

“Do you ever plan to stop being a playboy?” Mikasa scoffed at the brunette when he arrived at her home a little late than the scheduled time she had planned for their study session to start. While Armin was still running late, he had a reasonable reason which involved the bus he was on being caught in traffic. Whereas Eren, was on a date.

“I’m sorry.” He apologised for the tenth time, knowing that she was still irritated at the fact he lost track of time in the midst of his fun. “I mean, not really. It’s fun. You just don’t get it.” He said with a shrug, earning an eyeroll from the raven who just couldn’t understand why.

“Don’t you feel bad when you break someone’s heart?” She always felt a little iffy to Eren’s playboy habits.

“I always cut things off if I realise the girl is actually having real feelings.” He paused. “Otherwise, I just fool around. I’m just in it for the thrill.”

Mikasa raised a brow. Honestly, like what Armin had said, she hoped this was just a passing phase. “Yeah, yeah…” She sighed as she opened up her notes.

“What about you?” He asked. “Went on a date before?”

She flinched. “I…no.” She looked away timidly. “Studying is… enough.”

“Ehhh? You’re missing out on youth, Mika!” He exclaimed, before a mischievous look rose up to his face. “With such a pretty face…” He leaned in slightly, and if Armin had been there, he’d probably immediately withdraw his statement about him being able to keep his hands to himself. “You should be able find yourself a man like me—mmf!”

Mikasa pushed her notebook right up in his face, he was too close.

And a part of her hated how he gave her compliments like that, because it felt shallow with that smug, playboy tone of his. She hated how it’d make her feel flustered (and admittedly, a little happy) because he was definitely smooth with his words, especially when Armin wasn’t there to regulate his habits.

But she also liked it. The teasing; some of which she’d even return with her own playful taunts if she had the courage and wasn’t a flustering mess. It was all a first. Maybe that’s why she never exactly stopped him completely.

Maybe she just hated the fact it was all probably half-hearted, and he said all these things because he was a playboy who just enjoyed seeing girls getting all pink and red for him. Another reason why she hadn’t stop him because at least he knew his boundaries. He never touched her inappropriately nor did he ever push her to be his next new fun—and she doubted he even wanted her to be.

They were friends after all.

Friends… She thought. After spending all this time with him, something about labelling him as a friend made her feel… discontented. And she didn’t know why; not yet.

“You say that to everyone.” She sighed, and while her notebook blocked his face, she still averted her gaze away. “Everyone seems to have a pretty face to you…” It was only when she said the last sentence out loud, did she realise there was a hint of envy in her speech. She didn’t understand why.

“…Too far?” Eren asked, sounding less teasing and more serious as he gently took away the notebook that blocked her face. Honestly, Eren didn’t even know why he was teasing her (sometimes, a little more than he should in his opinion—but he made sure to never cross the line.), he didn’t plan to make her his new source of fun. That was the least of his intentions. Maybe it was because he found her reactions cute, and irresistible; and that became his fuel to joke with her every now and then.

Eren looked at her, at how her cheeks flushed and the timid look she wore as her eyes avoided contact with his. He made a mental note to dial down the teasing, but was quite reluctant.

Albeit, he rather do that than lose the friendship he forged with Mikasa in the past couple of months.

“No, not that. It’s just… I don’t know.” What am I even saying? Mikasa didn’t even know anymore, nor did she know why Eren’s eyes were suddenly fixated on her, looking at her with such softness and fondness.

“…You’re beautiful.” He suddenly confessed.

What? Was he pulling her leg?

Silence briefly engulfed the air, and Mikasa clenched her fist tightly before she forced herself to fill it.

“You’re just saying tha—”

“I’m being serious.” He cut her off.

She was beautiful. Her eyes, her smile, her cute facial expressions—but most of all, her heart. It was beautiful. She had been nothing less than nice to him the entire time. He had gotten to know her better through their study sessions; and sometimes they’d text and call afterwards. Eren hadn’t even notice he began to take less calls from his flings, answered less messages from them. Through the time they spent together, he had found out there were more things common between them than he had first thought. Through the time spent together, he made a friend that he could consider was as close to him as Armin was to him. The only difference was, after all the time he spent with her as a friend, he began to sub-consciously want something more with her. He wanted to have something with her; but it wasn’t the same way he wanted—or use to want the other girls in his life. And he was only realising this now.

“I…” He sounded serious, Mikasa knew and found it hard to react to because he had always been so cheery with her. Albeit yes, there were times when he was down and she of course, comforted him. But this was different.

What exactly was he insinuating?

“I…” Flustered and unsure of what to say, she immediately stood up, turned around. She needed a moment to leave; to have with herself and sort out the sudden fluttery feelings that accumulated in her stomach “I got to—”

Eren, thinking she wanted to leave because he said something stupid, immediately grabbed her arm to stop her. “Wait! I-I didn’t mean to—”

Startled by his grip, she turned back around a little too quickly, her toes bumping and tripping on the foot of the table, and suddenly she lost balance.

Everything happened so fast, and the next thing Mikasa knew was that she had fallen right on top with Eren. Lips pressed against each other.

It was Mikasa’s first kiss. She felt her heart skip a beat before it began to race in a damn marathon. She couldn’t steady the palpitations of her heart, nor could she control the redness that illuminated her cheeks.

And she didn’t want to push away. She didn’t want to let go or remove herself from this awkward position.

Both their eyes were wide, staring at each other’s orbs; a stare that soon melted down to an admiring gaze upon realising that a particular feeling they had was mutual. However, before either of them even dared making the first move, dared deepen the kiss, a blonde burst open the door.

“Hey Mikasa! Eren! Sorry I was late. The traffic—” He stopped himself, and was utterly shocked and caught off guard by the two teenagers with their bodies almost entangled with one another, with their lips pressed against one another.

A glare slowly came forth. “EREN?!”

Mikasa had a crush on Eren.

Mikasa had a crush on a damn playboy.

Whatever happened after Armin stormed in was all blur, all she recalled was them separating, leaving and not talking about it; the kiss. The feelings.

How did it happen? Mikasa didn’t know. Armin had already made it clear to her that getting involved with Eren Jaeger as a friend was fine, but getting involved with him as something romantic was the last thing someone who wanted commitment should even consider.

Mikasa didn’t like how Eren would approach, flirt, make a move and then made out with girls; at first she thought it was because, like Armin, it was agitating to some extent watching him fooling around, as well as being a fool sometimes. Little did she know that when time went by, the more time she spent with Eren personally as a friend, did she realise she wanted—she desired something more with him. He was a different person when he was with her. Admittedly, he did throw in occasional flirts from time-to-time, but more than that, behind the playboy persona he had in school, he was a sweet and kind boy (who can be reckless sometimes; but that’s a different and another story.) when he was alone with her.

Little did she know that agitation she felt soured into envy; because she wanted something from him that she didn’t think she’d ever get.

She hadn’t spoken to him since their accidental kiss, the weekend was awfully silent, and it went by quick with only texts from Armin who checked on her after that… incident.

He’ll never like me back. She thought, recalling all the girls he fooled around with; the ‘phase’ he was going through. At least, not in the way I want him to. Not in the same way I like…

Her cheeks flushed just thinking about it. However, all her flustered emotions soon spiralled down into one thing: sorrow.

She didn’t want to be his next one-time fling. She wanted to be by his side, as something more than a friend.

“But that’s not going to happen…” She murmured to herself, reflecting to all the flings he had; how wild and (sometimes) crazy they were. She was no match. Besides, she doubted Eren actually liked her back. Why would he? He seemed like he was having fun with all the other girls, so why would he want to settle for someone as plain and boring as her?

Whatever the case, she couldn’t avoid him now. The weekend went by in the blink of an eye and now, she was entering the school’s gates (albeit, a little tentatively). Just… act normal. She thought to herself. It’s just a kiss. Eren has… kissed tons of other girls before. No… big deal. He probably didn’t think much about it either…

She had resigned to accepting Eren as her silent crush; she didn’t think he could ever be hers, not when he was a playboy.

At that time, Mikasa didn’t know nor noticed how the time Eren spent with her had increased—and that was why their bond grew stronger during the time they spent together. She had eventually gotten accustomed to it.

And most of all, she didn’t know that Eren threw away all his other time with his flings just to spend more time with her.

Eren received an earful from Armin once he somehow, successfully dragged him out of Mikasa’s house.

“It was an accident!” Eren retorted, defensive. “You saw, didn’t you?! I didn’t make the move! She was on t-…” It was unusual for him to hesitate, or even get this flustered when talking about girls making the first move on him; much less them being assertive—

“She tripped and fell!” He groaned, looking away from the blonde who was practically glaring daggers right at him; or maybe he was trying to burn a hole right at his chest. Either one of them.

After a long conversation with both of them going back and forth, Armin sighed and decided to believe Eren. He wouldn’t lie to him… at least, not to this extent. “Fine. But you better apologise to her the next time you see her.” He grumbled, pinching the bridge of his nose. He wasn’t sure how Mikasa was doing; he for one knew romantic relationships was unfamiliar territory to her. To think that her first kiss was stolen by a playboy sounded quite unfortunate, in his opinion at least.

Well, at least Mikasa didn’t fall for Eren (metaphorically), at least. It wasn’t like she had a crush on him; and that was why she found her on top of him, right? He didn’t want her getting hurt, after all, Eren wasn’t the type to stay still when it came to girls. So—

“…And also…” He started to speak, breaking Armin’s thoughts off. “There’s… something I should tell you.” He bit his lip, knowing that he was going to get another painful earful once those words left his lips. “I… like Mikasa.”

Armin instantly halted in his steps, turned towards Eren, stared, and wondered if this was some sick joke of his. “I’m not joking.” He added, as if he had read Armin’s mind.

“Eren.” His tone grew menacing, “I swear. I don’t bother you and your damned playboy life because that isn’t my business. But, if you—”

“I don’t want Mikasa to be a one-time fling.” He specified, eying his friend with a solemn and serious look. “I… I’m serious.” He softened. What had Mikasa done to him? “I…I want to be serious with her.”

Armin arched a brow, arms crossed. He clearly wasn’t convinced; not yet at least. “So the infamous playboy at Shiganshina High just suddenly want to quit his playboy lifestyle?” Sure, love can change people. Armin knew that. But he had to be sure he wasn’t mistaking his feelings. “Then tell me, Eren. Convince me. It’s hard to believe that you suddenly… like her. That you want her as something more than a normal fling.” He paused briefly. “What makes you think you like her?”

Embarrassing and as flustering as it was, Eren began to tell. And Armin hadn’t expected for him to sound so genuine.

Mikasa awaited behind the school, as what Eren’s note indicated. She didn’t expect the first interaction she’d have with Eren after that accidental kiss was through a piece of paper he left underneath her table. Throughout the entire day, he hadn’t even batted an eye at her at all. Is he avoiding me? She thought, biting her lip nervously. Even during lunch, he left—and Mikasa could only assume he went to continue fooling around. I should’ve known better. He isn’t going to like me back…

When she asked Armin, he only shrugged and refused to say anything. That only made her worry worsen.

Why did Eren call her to meet him at the back of the school? Did he… plan to cut ties with her? Did Armin become too protective? Was that why he didn’t say anything?

Anxiousness overwhelmed her, and despite her colourful grades, she cursed at herself for being so stupid, foolish and most of all clumsy for tripping and kissing him. What was worst was that she didn’t even immediately pull away.

I can’t believe you, Mikasa. She thought to herself. You—

Her thoughts were instantly interrupted when she heard footsteps heading her way. Her head snapped up and she watched as a brunette, whose emerald orbs only took a glimpse at her, before averting away back to the ground, made his way towards her.

She watched, and didn’t say a thing.

Even when Eren was finally standing just a foot away from her, she kept quiet; her eyes looking away on the ground. Her heart starting to race again and she hated that it did.

I should just let go. I should just let go. It’s a silly crush. She thought as the silence between them prolonged. I should say something since I was the one who—

“Listen, Mikasa…” He said in a solemn tone, and Mikasa flinched, eyes looking up once again, meeting his emerald hues that now looked her way. “I…”

As Mikasa waited for Eren to deliver his speech, she anticipated and braced herself for the worst.

“I like you!”

Wait, what?

She noticed his cheeks reddening, his clenched fist as he forced himself to continue, “I… like you.” He repeated once again, but slower. The next thing he knew, he was pouring his entire heart out. “But its different from all the other girls I fooled around with. I don’t know how—I mean I know how, like after all the time we spent together as friends I found that you were quite enjoyable to be with even if you have your nose in a book for the most part…and then I started to… want to spend more time with you rather than fooling around I… I don’t know how to explain it but something about you just…” He took a deep breath, “It’s different.”

“I thought I just wanted to be closer friends with you and that was why I hang around you more often but then after that… accidental kiss, it all clicked. It felt different than all the other girls I…” He babbled on and on, his cheeks reddening after each flustering statement he made about how his feelings differed for her when compared to the other girls he fooled with. How he wanted something more with her.

He had gotten Armin’s blessing after he told him how he truly felt for Mikasa. “But whether or not she wants an actual relationship with you is up to her.” The blonde sighed, “You have quite the dirty, playboy reputation after all.”—and what he said was right.

Why would Mikasa want to be with a playboy like him? Would she even trust his words? Would she trust him? Give him a chance?

He hadn’t exactly been in a long-term relationship before.

“…and I understand if you don’t want to be with me… in that way.” He lowered his head, biting his lip. “I mean since I’ve… fooled around a lot and… you might not trust me and… I mean I deleted all their numbers already and cut ties… but… I understand if you still distrust me, however, I just… want to let you know…and I… hope you give me a chance.” He had always been direct, confident and barely ever paused or stammered in between his sentences and yet here he was.

A mess.

He didn’t dare lift his head, and stood there, frozen and silent while he waited for her response.

However, as the silence prolonged, he could’ve already guessed her answer.

No. It was going to be a rejection; that wouldn’t be a first, he had experienced those but none as heart-breaking as this.

And then what’d happen to their friendship? For what its worth, he hoped that they could remain friends. He liked her company. He didn’t want it to be over.

If she was by his side, even if it was just as a friend and not a lover, he’d be fine. He just wanted her—

“…Yes.” Came a soft voice, and Eren snapped his head back up in utter surprise; but his surprise was no match for Mikasa.

To think he’d confess to her. Mikasa hadn’t expect that. While she felt relieved, he didn’t invite her here to break their friendship or ask her to be one his part-time girlfriends, she was at first, undeniably stunned at his sudden confession.

Stunned, but happy. And Eren didn’t manage to see how flushed her cheeks became when he had looked away earlier, how her lips parted but she was still struggling to find proper words to articulate a respond.

She had so many things to say to him—but all of them came out in the form of a singular word.

“Yes.”

He sounded genuine, and she hadn’t seen Eren this flustered before and in his emerald hues she saw nothing but pure, raw honesty when he was pouring out his feelings. To think that she was able to make a playboy to change his ways was shocking even to her.

Eren stared at her, in disbelief. And before he could react ecstatically to this, he was caught off guard when the raventte suddenly leaned towards him, hands cupping his cheek as she (this time, not accidentally), crashed her lips against his.

Blushing furiously, shoulders tensed, Eren looked down at the raven who had her lips pressed against his. Since when was she that direct?

However, he eventually found his shoulders relaxing, his hands tracing down and wrapping around her waist as he found himself returning the kiss.

“Well, at least his phase is finally over.” Armin sighed quietly to himself, having watched the entire scene unfold from an empty classroom’s window before looking away as he continued to pack his bag. “…I wonder how Mikasa’s brother going to react to her dating an ex-playboy, though.”

#i hate this its so rushed omg gah #Eremika #eremika fanfic #snk #aot #snk fanfic #aot fanfic #attack on titan fanfic #shingeki no kyojin fanfic #aot fanfiction #Eren #Eren jaeger #Mikasa #Mikasa Ackerman #My fanfic

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kenmastwin · 4 years ago

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Fascinating ✰ KageHina

Genre: smut, first time, very sweet love making

Words: 1,901

Inspiration:

“Flowers bloom following the way of my fingertips, Every breath you take is entrancing, Don’t stop, come even closer to me.” - Groove by EXO

Today was a big day. Hinata had been on the toilet at least three times already and when the time came to meet up with Kageyama at the restaurant, he was so jumpy that even the call of his name made him fly out of his seat. Kageyama wasn’t in a much better state, either, he was simply better at hiding it. At one point during the evening, it crossed the both of their minds that maybe deciding that they would sleep together for the first time tonight wasn’t their best idea.

Still, they have been dating for long enough and tonight was as good as any other. They both longed for the experience but the anticipation kept them so on edge that it was impossible to focus on anything else.

Arriving to Kageyama’s home marked the moment when their stress peaked and if it weren’t for Hinata basically vibrating with nervousness, Kageyama might have passed out on his own doorstep. Strangely enough, seeing Hinata so restless calmed him down. He let out a long sigh as he led the way to his bedroom and sat down on the bed. He held out a hand towards Hinata and attempted an empathetic smile. He hoped he succeeded.

“Don’t be so nervous, it’s just me.”

“Right…” Hinata didn’t seem any calmer but took Kageyama’s hand and joined him on the bed, nonetheless.

Kageyama stared at him, examining every little reaction his boyfriend let slip as if they were on the court, in the middle of a tight game. His thumb rubbed small patterns on the back of Hinata’s hand in soothing motions. “We don’t have to do anything if you’re not ready, it’s fine,” he said, having half a mind to just throw all of tonight’s plans out the window before his heart gave out.

However, Hinata shook his head furiously, “No, I’m ready, I’m just a little nervous.”

“Yeah… I’m nervous too…” Kageyama pointedly looked away, a hint of pink coloring his cheeks. It made Hinata’s eyes widen. Kageyama was hardly ever nervous and even when he was, he would deny it with all his might. But now, here he was, admitting it while blushing. Hinata’s heart softened.

“So even you are nervous at times, huh?” he teased, grinning widely when Kageyama turned back to face him both embarrassed and angry.

“Shut up, I-” Kageyama’s incoming rant was cut off by a pair of lips landing on his own and a chuckle tickling him when Hinata pulled away.

“No need to be nervous, it’s just me.”

Kageyama looked so offended by his words being thrown back at him that he couldn’t utter a sound, only glared at the man laughing merrily in front of him. Finally, he sighed, “I really can’t win against you, can I?”

“Hehe, not a chance, Kageyama-kun,” Hinata giggled, wrapping his arms around Kageyama’s neck. “And now that you calmed down, kiss me.”

Kageyama rolled his eyes, the images of Hinata being a jittery mess earlier today flashing through his mind before he leaned in to lock their lips together.

Kissing was nice, a well-practiced routine they could never grow bored of, much like volleyball. Their lips moved in perfect sync, bringing immediate comfort to the room. The tip of a tongue poked at Hinata’s lips and it slipped inside his mouth without any restraint, joining his own in a passionate dance. Hinata’s fingers combed through Kageyama’s dark locks, pulling him even closer. Kageyama did the same with his hands on Hinata’s waist. Breathing was none of their priority and after a quick inhale, their lips met again, hating to be separated for even a second.

They were both panting when they finally pulled away, face flushed, lips puffy and parted as they tried to catch their breath. Their gazes locked and a glint of mutual understanding flashed through tangerine and blueberry eyes. Hinata pulled his shirt over his head and Kageyama followed suit. They kissed again for the who knows what time, a new kind of fire igniting when skin touched skin. Kageyama slowly leaned down, pressing his body into Hinata’s until they were both lying on the bed.

He pulled away and his breath got caught in his throat as he stared at Hinata’s figure under him. His hair was even more of a mess than usually, his cheeks were flushed red and his eyes glossy with an emotion Kageyama didn’t often see. His bare chest heaved up and down as he panted and Kageyama felt a rush go through his entire body in the form of a shiver.

“Kageyama-” Hinata’s voice came out as a hurried question when he caught the dangerous glint in his lover’s eyes. He felt a lump blocking his remaining words in his throat as Kageyama’s lips pressed against his neck. His entire body went numb when Kageyama sucked on his sensitive skin, wondering how he could immediately find the right spot without even thinking about it.

Kageyama continued kissing, sucking and biting all over Hinata’s neck and shoulders, slowly making his way downwards. His ears were full of all the little noises that slipped past Hinata’s lips and his own rushing blood. He knew he was way too immersed in his ministrations when he realized that he was not at all nervous anymore. All he could feel was an intense desire to take as much of the man under him as he was allowed.

Hinata was fascinating. This was one of the rare moments when Kageyama could freely adore and wonder about the ways Hinata expressed himself so freely, so unlike him. Kageyama’s fingertips brushed along his sides, slid down his chest and rushed up his stomach only to have Hinata flinch, lean into the touch and have goosebumps rise on his skin. Kageyama kissed down on pale skin, drawing gasps and sighs from Hinata's lips. He would leave purple love bites and relish in the sound of unrestrained moans and whines. Kageyama was bewitched by every single reaction Hinata granted him, getting greedier after every single one, never getting enough.

It was an accident. As much as it was natural in such a heated moment, it seemed as if the two had already forgotten about what they were even doing. Kageyama rose up to kiss Hinata again when his thigh brushed against an already present erection. Hinata whined, the sound much louder and striking than what Kageyama managed to draw out of him so far. The both of them stared at each other, wide eyed.

“Uh...”

“So...”

“Y-yeah...”

The awkward conversation out of the way, Kageyama helped Hinata out of his pants, underwear and socks, gulping at the sight of his now fully naked lover.

“Don’t stare, you take it off too,” Hinata muttered, irritation lacing his voice that served the purpose of masking his embarrassment.

“Curious much?” Kageyama teased, rising to his knees and deliberately taking his time pulling his pants down.

“No way!” Hinata blushed a shade darker, redder than a tomato and Kageyama snickered to himself. Suddenly, almost naturally, an idea came to him as if his instincts were telling him how to proceed from here.

“Give me your hand,” he said, reaching out to hold one of Hinata’s hand. He guided it to his crotch still covered by his underwear, letting his hardening member be touched.

Hinata gasped at the unfamiliar sensation, his mouth opening with curiosity as he felt Kageyama up, stroking through the piece of clothing until he could hear Kageyama’s low moans. Hinata peeled off the underwear carefully, releasing the cock that was fully hardened and dripping with pre cum. He looked up at Kageyama with a question in his gaze. Kageyama nodded.

A tube of lubricant and a condom appeared from a nightstand’s drawer and soon, everything was prepared for the final act. Kageyama positioned himself between Hinata’s legs to replace his fingers with his cock. He pushed inside slowly, very slowly, and his brows furrowed with concentration, his mind more focused than setting up at a critical moment. He wasn’t worried, though, because just like at a critical moment in a game, Hinata was the one there with him now as well. The person who trusted him fully and the person he fully trusted. Everything is going to be fine, he told himself as he bottomed out.

“How does it feel?” he asked, trying not to think about how good it felt for him. His entire body was burning with the desire to move, to set a pace, to hurry and chase his pleasure.

“Alright,” Hinata breathed out, panting a bit.

“Does it hurt?”

“Mn,” he shook his head. “It’s okay.”

“Tell me if it hurts. Don’t try to bear it, understand?” Kageyama only dared to move when Hinata reassured him that he would let him know if it hurt too much. Kageyama’s worry wasn’t baseless, he had first-hand experience seeing how Hinata pushed himself even when he was burning with a fever.

Taking a deep breath, Kageyama began to move in and out, his hips making slow and deliberate motions. Soft groans left his lips as he relished in the tight warmth wrapped completely around him, urging him to go faster and even deeper. His eyes were locked on Hinata’s face, observing his expressions, the way he opened and closed his mouth to make way for moans, complimenting Kageyama when he hit the right spot. Once again, he got lost in the ever-changing reactions of his boyfriend, shifting his body and his movements just to see what Hinata’s face would show him. A demand passed on by a whine, a moan, a tremble and Kageyama had already forgotten about his own pleasure, focusing entirely on the man under him.

He was only reminded of it when he felt as if something was about to burst inside him, wiping his mind blank. He’d just noticed the way he was rapidly snapping his hips against Hinata’s, seemingly in the same kind of state. It wasn’t surprising, their stamina and their mindset were both similar, it somehow made sense that their ways in the bedroom would also be the same.

“Tobio, Tobio!” Hinata shouted, anxiety evident in his tone.

Kageyama leaned down to kiss him as a way of comfort. “Shh don’t panic, it’s okay, it’ll be over soon.”

To be honest, Kageyama also had no idea what to expect but he did know that it would be okay and it would be over soon. As long as they were together, it would be okay so he wasn’t afraid of letting himself come undone.

Hinata did the same, quietly whimpering as Kageyama captured his lips again and again.

It was all over, naked bodies dropping down powerlessly on messy bedsheets. Limbs tangled, they struggled to catch their breath after coming down a high they experienced for the first time.

Hinata, ever the one with unlimited energy, was the first one to speak. “You did well,” he said, patting the head resting on his chest.

Kageyama snorted, “Of course I did.” But what he really thought was that’s a relief. He didn’t hurt Hinata, he let Hinata feel pleasure, he did well.

And so, the two of them could lay there, savoring the moment of their first time together.

#haikyuu #kagehina #kageyama tobio #hinata shouyou #haikyuu fanfiction #kagehina fanfiction

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flying-elliska · 5 years ago

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Ok I caught up with wtfock s3 because well, it felt weird to leave unfinished (except a few clips i just didn’t want to watch, like the attack one). here’s what worked and didn’t for me (i’m pretty critical so don’t read if that sort of thing upsets you or you’re not in the mood) because i still think having this story remade so often is an unprecendented storytelling experiment worth thinking about even when it doesn’t entirely work (and i think argumented criticism is good, but if you post hate about the actors/fans etc you really suck tbh) :

- to start with positives : like many said, the acting was pretty damn good. overall wtfock has a really solid cast. the willems have succeeded in creating an onscreen queer intimacy that feels very believable, no holds barred and no awkwardness, and they have to be commended for that. there’s a lot of chemistry and tension at first between them, which then turns into something very soft and sweet and puppy-love-like. it was nice seeing Robbe evolve and the sweet bean energy that emanates from how the actor plays him is very very powerful. i also loved the warmth of the flatshare, and as a Dutchie I just adored the Sinterklaas bits, it was so funny and i loved the found family vibes. warmth is just something they do really well, esp with the last clips, perfume shopping, playing board games, the party at the end. They use the Christmassy vibes really well. the cinematography has its moments too, contrasts between warm and cold, the episode at the beach is gorgeous, the sequence in the tunnel, the light on their faces when they are in that classroom surrounded by drawings. wtfock as a whole is also good at creating some very lovable secondary characters, be it Milan, Yasmina, Noor, or especially king Senne. So, I do understand that there are things to love about this remake, which is probably why my disappointment feels so strong. I really wanted to care about these characters in their journey.

- on to the controversial : i don’t necessarily fault them for wanting to show a more prononced aspect of homophobia. i think the debate about this often lacks nuance. on one hand, this is the sixth remake, and homophobia is something that is still often prevalent, and having one remake show that out of six is not in itself a problem. on the other, yes, happy fluffy stories are important, but sometimes people who have gone through stuff like this also need to see their experiences represented. the power of skam is that it shows difficult experiences BUT ALSO a happy ending. that can be very healing, i think, compared to other stories which focus only on the drama. the trouble is, i don’t think they dealt with it very well, or put any effort into processing the consequences of these harrowing things. and if you don’t, it feels cheap.

- on to my main gripe : the writing. previsible, i know. but to me, essential. and this is not about them ‘changing things’ - i like when remakes change stuff, when they do it well. the thing is, i have been burned too many times before. and when i sense that the writing is being wack, it makes it automatically much harder for me to invest emotionally in the characters. and simply put there were signs early on that made me distrust the writers. for starters, the first two episodes gave me a feeling that they didn’t have their priorities in order. the POV-immersion and depth is one of the most powerful aspects of skam, and it was lost. too many early clips felt out of Robbe’s perspective, and when it was him it was about Noor ; a few clips to show his discomfort were on point, but there were too many of them, and there were repetitive, losing time on what isn’t really an essential part of Robbe’s journey. and while they were spending time on clips that felt like misery flavored filler, they decided several times to condense original clips focused on Isak and Even, together ; like their first meeting and then their first hangout, or later in the series OHN and the minute by minute talk. and i think their story suffered from that. i think because they don’t have a real discussion early on, the buildup of their relationship feels mostly based on physical attraction. and while it certainly is a thing that happens, it just isn’t my fave love story thing. i missed the sweet pining from afar and tension that makes later drama believable. it felt like they brought the drama comparatively too fast without enough character work to make it worthwhile. Also there is just too much time spent on Zoenne drama, and their breakup seems like it foreshadows the dreaded s4 love triangle, which, yikes. the focus is all over the place, the rythm felt incoherent.

- what’s more, they decided to introduce pretty grave elements of plot, like Robbe using slurs against Sander, the homophobic attack, the suicidal urges on both their sides, Sander kissing Britt while he was still saying I love you to Robbe in the morning, without either proper build up or resolution. It made it all feel cheap, jarring, and unearned, especially when they didn’t put trigger warnings or made jokes about it on insta or waited forever to give news about the characters being ok. it felt like drama for the sake of drama, and definitely not written with a vulnerable audience of queer teens in mind. and at the same time, when it came to the ‘big scenes’ of their relationship, like the first kiss or the universes talk or sander’s episode, it felt more or less lifted from OG without a lot of effort made to adapt it to them. i actually quit live watching/blogging after the first kiss scene, because of how similar it was, and how uninspired it felt, and lukewarm. it felt like a lack of imagination. when it came to OHN, the scene in itself was lovely, but the weird time gap, random timing and people seemingly doing nothing after a suicidal Sander disappeared, sort of broke it for me. In the OG the combo of buildup, longing, realisation, fear, release works so well in a sequence, and splitting it over time really diluted it, to me. Similarly the quickly thrown out ‘life is now’ at the ending felt sort of out of nowhere, while in OG it was such a lovely bookend, him apologizing to Eva and reflecting on his growth. The symbolism, which ties everything so beautifully together in themes of rebirth, salvation, baptism, union, faith, deciding your own narrative in OG, here feels inconsistent. There is an attempt I see, something about wasteland vs. warmth/family, but it’s often absent of main clips. It’s nowhere near as coherent as it could be.

- all of this builds up to the main problem for me, of the season. which is, i didn’t really get into Robbe and Sander’s relationship. Or their individual arcs for that matter. When it comes to Robbe, I guess he just isn’t my type of character. I feel like he is missing the fire of an Isak. A lot of the time he just felt too passive, like he let other characters make his decisions. I was waiting for him to stand up for himself more than he did. And there are too many scenes of another character doing his coming out for him. And then Sander ; I have to say I don’t understand all the love his character gets. Maybe because that’s because he sort of gives me Dutch fuckboi vibes...but there were several times he just came accross as a flat out asshole. I found him intriguing in his intro clip, chaotic and charming, but that never really went where i expected it to. i didn’t get his passion, what drew him to art. the symbolism around his character - basically Bowie, and drawing Robbe, and Chernobyl (which is a bit tasteless imho, turning a tragedy like that into a cutesy romantic thing), feels ...disjointed, and shallow to me. Like I never really got into it. And maybe some people did and noticed deeper links but to me, I got stuck at the surface. I saw a lot of interesting theories with what was going on with him but in the end they just copied OG. And I’m sad to say, but he ended up feeling like a manic pixie dream boy cliché to me, and i just didn’t understand what drew them to each other so strongly. Yes, Robbe is caring and Sander is in need of care, but that feels like a very reductive reproduction of OG. Beyond that...i don’t know. Certain complexities of the OG i loved just...were sanded away, like Isak being ignorant about MI and learning compassion. This just...didn’t feel like it had the same depth, and often felt like soapy teenage drama, leaning too hard and too lazily on the actors’ chemistry. i like my romances wordy and solidly enmeshed in character development, and this was not it. It never felt like they had a real conversation about things, esp after the drama.

- i think this is the first remake that made me actually angry for reasons not related to problematic cast shit, and so i’m trying to analyze that emotion. for me it comes down to too much drama, too heavy handed. Too much of the boy squad being shitty to Robbe, too much Noor, too much filler clips without any deeper meaning, too much things distracting from getting to know the main characters and going into their issues in depth. They changed stuff, but didn’t have the guts to actually follow through. They broke the mold but only in ways that ended up feeling shallow and unconsequential. Like I would have loved seeing Robbe go to therapy ! see his mom ! Zoe and Robbe go to the police together ! Sander have a complicated home situation ! or doing a Bowie related art installation to express his feelings of alienation ! seeing more of the underground graffiti scene ! or just...something, idk. And them also removing the faith-related themes also felt disappointing. and the ohn clip taking place in the place where sander draws feels very....basic to me, even if it was pretty. very ‘oh he’s an artist, here is his safe place’....hm, okay. I didn’t like that they made Britt into such a villain, I didn’t like how the boy squad showed no care for Robbe whatsoever for weeks until the plot said it was time for them to be redeemed in a way that felt too jarring, and I didn’t like that they made Moyo so horrible but redeemed him so easily. I actually thought they would show that it’s okay to separate yourself from friends who are that bigoted, because it just shows they are not willing to care for people. And him suddenly saying those sweet and mature things felt too out of characters and a ahah ‘gotcha’ rather than depth . I didn’t like that Robbe, too, was made so virulent by his internalized homophobia but got over it so quickly. I think what disappointed me most, in the end, was that I kept picking up potential and the show kept doing absolutely nothing with it, or confirming my fears, and it made me feel stupid and out of tune with whatever they were doing. And it’s, to me, symptomatic in modern storytelling of a trend to privilege shocks and twists over inner coherence and build up. And it makes for...Very underwhelming stuff, in the end.

- all in all, i think this remake illustrates why s3 of OG is not as easy to remake as it sounds. it’s very intricate machinery, with a pitch perfect rhythm (and an extremely passionate nitpicky fanbase lmao). and if you don’t get all the parts of why it’s so great, you’re going to lose a lot of it. (and all the remakes ended losing up stuff in translation ; more or less compensated by inventivity and charm of their own.) so many mainstream press articles praise the real time/social media format and the ‘real talk about teen issues’ which, yeah, is part of the success, but doesn’t explain the devotion on its own. there’s the way the story uses real time to build up a storytelling rythm that feels organic and makes sense as if it was part of the lives of the viewer. There’s foreshadowing and aftershocks. Wtfock often feels like they wrote the clip numbers on darts and randomly threw them at a week planner. If an episode of a regular series ends on a cliffhanger, we can be thrilled and frustrated and put it aside for next week. but if you end an episode with a character shown to be suicidal, or you don’t show them being okay after a beating, for hours or days, that’s the emotion you leave your viewers with, because skam is a continuous experience. and remakes who pile on drama moments without respite (looking at you too skamfr s4) don’t get how tiring and disengaging this can be, in this format. skam worked so well because of how benevolent it was, on the whole. and also, cheeky, with that ‘don’t take it too seriously’ deflating humor. grumpy isak in ‘hate me now’ mode getting bumped into. this lightness and comedy often feels missing here. also my god the social media is absolutely terrible. plus...there is too much filler. honestly, them having more time, on the whole...ended up being a bad thing. Plus Wtfock feels like it has so much more unadressed plot points, like...why did Sander change his mind exactly and kiss Britt again ? How did Robbe’s mom react ? Who did the attack ? What is happening w Senne now ? etc. And it feels like they just missed the fact that OG, however subtly, did adress those things.

- now, don’t get me wrong, i’m happy it’s popular in Belgium. On the whole it’s still a beautiful story of love and acceptance. and that people found something in it that spoke to them. but as a remake, it’s probably one of the most disappointing yet, to me. and i sort of...don’t get the hype. and i don’t want to be too ‘oh cute boys kissing’ cynical about it. but i think this illustrates why in the end, this is also very subjective. there are probably things i missed because i didn’t feel the need to examine it in depth or do the extra emotional work that comes with being a devoted fan of something. and some of their choices made me angry, and i’m not forgiving when it comes to these things. i still wish them success for s4 and whatever else, but i don’t think i will watch live, at least unless it gets really rave reviews about their treatment of Yasmina’s season. i mean they got s2 right, who knows?

#wtfock #also i'm willing to discuss this reasonably but any sort of hate will be deleted on sight lol #i thought a lot about posting this or not but then i was like well this is my blog and i have a lot of emotions about this #so i needed to process

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julia-brookes · 5 years ago

Text

Leif x Reader | Cat & Mouse

Synopsis/ Author's note: (The reader is basically Ava in this oneshot) Perhaps taking in a cohort of daemos isn't what you expected to be doing this weekend, but you learned to live with it. That is, until a certain daemos decides to play a game of cat and mouse with you... (Consent is important, kids)

Word count: 1629

Leif was a daemos of many desires, and he knew exactly what he wanted: you. Put it simply, he was a casanova -- a womanizer. One look into his deep-set pools of aquamarine and girls would be putty in his hands. But not you. Something about you was different, something indescribable. You were not impressed by his many charms -- you had priorities. The grinding gears of life were constantly turning, after all, the gears spare no one.

You had him mesmerized. Leif fell for everything about you: your face, your body, and your aura, he wanted it all. Of course, Leif didn't mean to fall under your spell, there was just something so captivating about you, something that even he couldn't quite pinpoint. But you never seemed to notice, or even care. Your attention was shared among the daemos cohort, after all.

Today was no different, your attention was focused on a daemos, but not Leif. You were, yet again, arguing with Rhys about a minuscule matter. Apparently one box of ice cream wasn't enough to please this intellectual.

"Rhys, you can't have so much ice cream in one day! Literally no one on the face of this earth can tolerate that much sugar!" You clapped your hands, emphasizing your point while charging at him. Rhys bolted out of the kitchen, ice cream box in hand.

"Sorceress, you're forgetting that I'm not from earth!" The ice-cream-high daemos yelled back, picking up his pace. You cringed, thinking of how naïve Rhys sounded.

"RHYS THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS!!!" You cornered him. "Now, hand over the ice cream." You extended your hand impatiently. But, oh no, he was NOT going down without a fight. Before you knew it, you were face-to-face with him. His hands were high in the air, dangling the box. And damn was he tall. Even on your tippy-toes, you were just a few inches shy of his reach. You groaned in annoyance.

A wicked idea flew into your head. From previous experience, you knew a daemos's weakness: their horns. "Fine, then we'll have to do this the hard way..." your hand ever-so-slightly grazed the intellectual's left horn, causing him to flinch as a reflex, while simultaneously dropping the ice cream box. Feigning your innocence, you reached into your pocket to pull out a bright crimson-colored Crayola pen. Your plan? Draw on the box and trick Rhys into thinking that it was a seal. "I'll do it, Rhys. I'll seal the box! If I do, whoever opens it without permission dies...." you flashed him a glare. Needless to say, he was horrified. He begged for your mercy, and you gave your mercy to him.

Leif noticed Rhys's proximity to you. That daemos was too close to you for Leif's comfort. Perhaps after this, he could strike up a conversation with you. He wanted your attention that he was so deprived of. He knew he had to get it somehow...

Much to Leif's chagrin, he wasn't able to. An incoherent "A-HA" and "I'VE FOUND IT!" Bellowed throughout the apartment. You cringed again. From the sound of it, Asch was rummaging through your room again. Yet another groan of annoyance escaped your mouth as you bolted towards the noise. Your suspicions were correct: Asch was in your room, sifting throug— your underwear draw? Fuc- not this bulls- OH MY GOSH!!! Asch charged a fireball at the pile of lingerie on the floor. You had already spent a fortune on bras, as the daemos prince was so adamant on 'destroying your source of power'.

"ASCH! PUT MY BRAS DOWN! I NEED THEM!!!" You bolted behind him pulled him into an embrace, effectively stopping him from burning your undergarments. There was no physical barrier between the two of you... only the cloth of his cape kept you away from the curve of his back. And damn, was he muscular. An awkward silence instilled between the two of you. You feared that if you let him go, another batch of your undergarments would fall victim to Asch's fiery wrath. Perhaps it wasn't such a good idea to pull him into an embrace... "The more you destroy, the more power sources will regenerate, your highness..." You let the prince go as he turned around to meet you in the eyes.

"WHO is the prisoner again?" Asch averted his eyes, unable to maintain his gaze on you. You scoffed.

"Mhm, and WHO is the powerful sorceress?" You shot back at him. His highness was unable to answer. He simply left your room without a word.

You were alone, this was the opening that Leif had been looking for: the opportunity to steal you away from the others, to have you for himself... or, so he thought...

The sound of Noi's blood-curdling screams took you off-guard.

"WHAT NOW?!" You wanted to pull your hair out.

You found The magicless daemos in the kitchen, curled up into a ball while holding his fingers with tears streaming down his cheeks. You looked to his left, where you found the oven open and turned to 400 degrees Fahrenheit. It took you a matter of seconds to connect the dots: Noi had fu-- messed with the oven.

"Noi, what happened?!" You kneeled next to his head as he looked at you through his tears, mumbling something about the 'heat box'. He wasn't speaking words, all he did was cry.

You huffed, gently rubbing an ice cube on Noi's burn. "Shhh..." you comforted him. "You'll be fine, Noi, trust me..." A small smile spread across his face, thanking you for your hospitality.

Today was a long day, from your ice cream stash being raided, to yet another set of your underwear being destroyed, you just couldn't seem to catch a break. You sighed to yourself as you looked out the window of your apartment. The others had gone to bed by this time. It was yet another sleepless night, you mused at what you could do tonight to ease your racing thoughts. Wrapping your blanket around your body, you found yourself wandering into the kitchen. Alone you sat, in the empty room, book in hand, immersing yourself into the wizarding world of Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone.

It wasn't long before you felt the presence of someone next to you. The sound of a ceramic mug being placed next to you brought you out of your imagination. You looked to hot right: Pierce was sat next to you with a mug of hot tea in his hand. He pushed it towards you with a reassuring smile. You returned his smile and set down your book.

"Hello," you waved at him. The daemos returned with a smile. "Thank you Pierce..."

"You're welcome," he pat your head, causing your cheeks to glow a deep shade of red. There was something about him that made you feel at ease, you felt vulnerable around him...

The two of you exchanged words for what felt like hours. You failed to notice him though... Leif was furious! He should have just stolen you for himself when he had the chance. He wanted you, and he always got what he wanted. This wasn't just passion, it was something else, something more invigorating. All he knew was that he wanted you, mind, body, and soul. Leif wanted nothing more than to steal you away, to hold you in his arms and mark you as his own... and he would soon get his chance.

It had been a rather uneventful Monday, the rest of the daemos were in their own rooms while you stayed in your own. Until a certain someone came into your room unannounced.

Your back was pressed against the wall. Leif was face-to-face with you, embracing your figure in his arms. "Darling..." he cooed, ever-so-slightly brushing his lips against yours. It was as if he was under some sort of spell.... you felt his lips lock into yours as he deepened the kiss. It was then when inside you snapped: the voice of reason. This wasn't what you wanted, and he knew it. With all the strength you could muster, the face of your palms met with his cheeks, sending a loud echo into the air. You were fuming; you opened your mouth to speak.

"I don't know how it is in your world, but that is NOT how you treat a sorceress!" You scolded him. "You don't simply waltz your way into a girl's room and steal a kiss without consent!!!" You stormed into the kitchen, fuming in indignation.

For the first time in his life, Leif felt horrible... He wanted you, but not like this... not if you were unhappy with him.

Days passed. An awkward silence had instilled between the two of you. He had to apologize. He wanted to fix things...

It was late, and sleepless night for you again. You lied in your bed, staring at the empty could of a ceiling before a knock interrupted your thoughts. "(Y/n)?" A voice called out. It was Leif.

"Come in?" You returned. And in Leif came, vulnerable... another awkward silence instilled.

"I was an idiot for what happened... I'm sorry. I want to set things right" He kneeled, looking down. He looked genuinely apologetic.

Something in your heart told you that perhaps he was truly sorry. You sighed. "Fine... you can start by asking for consent before kissing me," you remarked sarcastically. Leif was in tears, pulling you into an embrace.

"Kiss me, you fool." You said. And Leif obliged, locking your lips with his, in a deep and emotional kiss... For once in this game of Cat and Mouse, the mouse was in total control...

#Aphmau #my inner demons #aphmau my inner demons #leif x reader #My inner demons x reader #my inner demons aphmau #mystreet #aphmau pierce #aphmau leif #aphmau noi #aphmau asch #aphmau roleplay #asch x reader #aphmau minecraft diaries #minecraft diaries aphmau

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asarahworld-writes · 5 years ago

Text

Moments

Moments, when Anakin Skywalker felt the pull of the Dark Side. And one when he felt the Light shine through.

**Pre-hologram meeting “on” Kashyyyk.**

AO3

“Is it possible to learn this power?”

“Not from a Jedi.”

Anakin looked up to the Chancellor, his mentor, his friend. A non-Force-sensitive being who knew Sith legends.

“How?”

“How what?” Was it his imagination, or did the Chancellor’s tone sour when questioned? Anakin was well-versed in reading the tone of a person’s voice – the effects of slavery on a person never healed, not when one’s survival had once depended on certain skills.

“How do you know a Sith legend? None of the Jedi, not even Master Yoda, are versed in these matters.”

“Oh,” the Chancellor waved a hand, “you tend to pick up bits and pieces over the years. You see, Anakin, it’s not how I know the story that’s important, it’s the story itself that matters. It was only through understanding the Dark Side of the Force that Darth Plagueis was able to learn, and more importantly, use that power to save others… those he loved.”

“And yet his apprentice still killed him. Chancellor, excuse my bluntness, but why are you telling me this?” Obi-Wan had sensed something in the Chancellor, had warned the Council about it. Anakin’s stomach turned. His master was right. The Chancellor was up to something.

“Because I thought it was something you needed to hear, young Skywalker. There is more to the Force, and indeed, to life, than what the Jedi will tell you.”

Anakin was quiet, watching the ballet with feigned interest. It was a strange relationship, the friendship between a Jedi and the Chancellor of the Republic. Anakin knew there was some truth in Obi-Wan’s mistrust of the Nabooian politician that went beyond a general distaste of politics.

ROTSROTSROTSROTSROTSROTSROTSROTSROTSROTSROTSROTSROTS

**Palpatine having just murdered Master Windu**

“What have I done?” Anakin stumbled back, collapsing onto a stool, watching in disbelief as the Chancellor, the Sith Lord, rose from the ledge.

“You’re fulfilling your destiny, Anakin.” The Chancellor advanced and Anakin bowed his head, trying to centre himself. “Become my apprentice. Learn to use the Dark Side of the Force.”

“No,” Anakin muttered, his resolve weakening as the Chancellor drew nearer.

“It can save her, as you failed to save your mother,” the Chancellor stopped mere feet away. “Senator Amidala.”

“You can save Padmé?” The words tumbled from Anakin’s mouth before he had the chance to think. “I can’t live without her.”

“If we work together, I know we can discover the secret,” the Chancellor said. Anakin’s hand twitched as if to draw his lightsabre. “Look at me, Anakin. Would you really pull your weapon on an injured man?” Anakin hesitated, then turned the laser sword on to the Chancellor’s throat. “Come now, Anakin.”

“No.” The lightsabre was not still. “You may be injured, but I have no doubt that you’re still dangerous. You will go before the Senate and revoke the emergency powers. Then there will be a hearing.”

“On what charge?” The Chancellor asked, his voice sickly.

“Corruption of the government. Murder. And if the Senate does not convict you, the Council will. Terribly flawed though they may be, the Jedi are still the keepers of peace in the galaxy.”

“Kill me, and your wife will die. Oh, yes, Anakin. I do know about your ‘secret’ marriage, on Naboo. You went to the Lake Country, a beautiful spot no doubt.”

Anakin’s minded was nearly blinded by an onslaught of memories of Padmé. “How do you know about Lake Country? There was only myself, Padmé, and two droids present.”

“As I have already told you, Anakin, the Dark Side of the Force can lead to many open doors. Join me.”

“You speak with great certainty with a lightsabre drawn on your throat,” Anakin’s voice was steady.

“Do it. Kill me and you will be forced to assume my place in the budding Empire. Let me live, and you will be the second most powerful man in the galaxy.”

ROTSROTSROTSROTSROTSROTSROTSROTSROTSROTSROTSROTSROTS

“I hate you!”

Obi-Wan Kenobi stared down at the smoldering man below. “You’re my brother, Anakin. I love you.” Using the Force, Obi-Wan lifted Anakin from the molten rock. “I love you, and I have failed you, and for that I am more sorry than you will ever know.”

“You took her from me!”

“Padmé? Anakin, she was terrified of you. There are limits to whom even the Chosen One can save! She would rather die than have you like this!”

Obi-Wan’s phrasing drew Anakin from his rage. “She’s alive?” He rasped.

“Yes, of course, she’s alive,” Obi-Wan reached toward his brother.

“Help me,” Anakin rasped. “Help me save Padmé’s life. Senator Palpatine, he’s the Sith Lord. He said,” he hesitated briefly, “he said that he could save her.”

“Anakin, I know that the Jedi, that I have failed you in the past. I promise to do everything in my power to save Padmé. She is a dear friend and,” Obi-Wan paused, clearly debating whether to continue, “and she’s told me the truth.”

The truth. Anakin didn’t know what the truth meant any more.

“The truth is that you and Padmé are in love and have been for nearly your whole lives,” Obi-Wan said gently. “The truth is that you’re my brother and I have not supported you when you needed me. The truth is that Darth Sidious got into your head and manipulated you to suit his own needs. The truth is that you are Anakin Skywalker, and you are a good person.” Obi-Wan picked up Anakin’s fallen lightsabre and tucked it into his belt, before bending over his friend. “The truth is that I hope we can save you, Anakin.”

ROTSROTSROTSROTSROTSROTSROTSROTSROTSROTSROTSROTSROTS

When Anakin awoke, he was naked. His charred hand easily swept through the bacta, reaching desperately for his wife. Her name silently escaped his burned lips, air bubbles popping fiercely as they broke the tank’s surface.

Obi-Wan Kenobi lay a hand over the outside of the bacta tank. When Anakin Skywalker had returned, so had Padmé’s life force. She had grown stronger as her due date neared, and she had cried with relief when her babies had been born alive and well. Leia Amidala and Luke Skywalker were tiny and so quiet that Obi-Wan had been afraid if they didn’t lose Padmé and Anakin, they would lose the twins.

“Soon,” he quietly promised his brother.

Soon was relative. Anakin’s burns were severe and no one quite understood how the true Sith Lord had manipulated Padmé’s life force to support him. Padmé was on life support, improving every day, and Anakin spent more time in the bacta than out, healing his physical and emotional traumas. Obi-Wan spent his days and nights split into visiting each of the Skywalkers until, exhausted, he comm’ed for help.

It took two days for the Naberries to arrive from Naboo, five for the Larses to arrange passage and fly in from the Outer Rim. Ruwee and Jobal immediately busied themselves with caring for the twins, being the only people in the facility who had experience with children. (They immersed themselves in their youngest grandchildren, with Sola and her children arriving later).

With six family members present, no Skywalker was ever uncared for. Pooja and Ryoo Naberrie looked on in wonder as their grandfather rocked baby Leia to sleep. Beru Lars learned to perfect heating a baby’s bottle and was the only one who could get Luke to stop fussing long enough to eat. Obi-Wan Kenobi and Owen Lars took turns sitting up with Anakin, doing whatever they could to support their brother’s recovery, as Jobal and Sola Naberrie did with Padmé.

Eventually, Anakin Skywalker was released, emerging from the bacta tank a new man. His skin was badly scared, his hair patchy where it had been burned away, but he was healed enough that the med-droids released him.

“Padmé,” he gasped, his voice rough and scratchy from not having been used in so long. He stepped forward and stopped, raising his robe from the floor to see the metal prosthetic leg. Obi-Wan was at his side immediately.

“What do you remember?”

“The Chancellor…he’s the Sith Lord!” Anakin said, the urgency in his voice only heightened by his concern for his wife.

“The Jedi have seen to his removal from office. Anakin, what else do you remember?” There was a sense of urgency underlying his friend and mentor’s calm.

“Padmé,” Anakin repeated. “My dreams, they were like the ones about my mother,” his voice broke. “And the baby.”

“The children are healthy. Your families have been here, looking after them while you’ve been recovering.”

Children. He was a father. He realized that Obi-Wan was still speaking.

“…didn’t know. She named them. Luke and Leia Naberrie-Skywalker.” Anakin tried to lift his head, before realizing that of course they wouldn’t be waiting in the hospital room for him to wake up. Obi-Wan must have sensed his thoughts, for he moved to the door. A few minutes later, he re-entered the room with a woman he vaguely recognized as Padmé’s mother and a man he thought could have been Cliegg Lars’ son. Anakin only had eyes for the blanket in Missus Naberrie’s arms.

“Anakin, this is Luke Naberrie-Skywalker,” Jobal said softly. She brought his son closer, so close that Anakin could have reached out and touched him. But he hesitated. Luke was not the tiny newborn he had expected. This baby was a few months old at the very least, with a mess of blonde hair on his head. Jobal brought the blankets closer, and Anakin automatically took the baby. His baby. His son, little Luke Skywalker. Something registered in his mind.

“Twins?”

His stepbrother entered the room, carrying another bundle of blankets. “Leia Naberrie-Skywalker,” Owen laid the baby girl in Anakin’s free arm. An arm that was made entirely of metal, much like his left hand. That train of thought disappeared the moment that Leia’s large brown eyes looked into his own blue ones.

Tears were rolling down Anakin’s face when he finally looked away from his daughter. “Where is Padmé?”

“Recovering. When you nearly died, so did she. The two of you are linked, through the Force, Anakin.” Obi-Wan rested his hand on Anakin’s shoulder. “She is so strong. Her doctor believes she will wake within the next few hours.”

“I need to see her. I need to see Padmé,” Anakin stood, the twins still cradled in his arms. Obi-Wan, already at his side, steadied him.

“Of course,” Obi-Wan said quietly.

There was an odd processional heading down the corridor, if anyone had paid any attention. A medical droid followed by a man clutching two tiny babies (a man unused to what were obviously new prosthetic limbs). Another slightly older man hanging on to the new father, physically supporting him. His parents, and brother and sister. (A family).

Anakin collapsed at his wife’s bedside.

“Padmé,” he murmured, laying his children on the bed beside their mother.

Obi-Wan watched with intrigue. Against all odds, Padmé was beginning to stir. The Force worked in mysterious ways, that much he knew, but to witness it in this way was completely new to him.

“Anakin?” Though her voice was small and weak, there was no denying its power over the man kneeling at the woman’s side.

“Padmé.” Anakin’s head snapped up, his eyes feasting on the sight of his wife recovering. Padmé’s hand moved, nearly imperceptibly, until it was resting on her husband’s head, buried in his hair.

“The twins?” She breathed, feebly attempting to sit upright. Her children were on either side of her and Anakin gently guided her hands so that they were touching them.

The Naberrie-Skywalker family was healing. Together, as a family. Anakin and Padmé. Obi-Wan, and Ruwee and Jobal. Owen and Beru. Sola, Pooja, and Ryoo. And perhaps the most important connection, Anakin and Padmé, and their children.

#sw fanfic #sw #anakin x padme #rots #rots au #sw au

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fallenangelspnfanfic · 6 years ago

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Wayward Huntress : Chapter 10

WOOOOOH! Chapter 10 ! I made it yay!

This chapter is fully SMUT related I hope you’ll enjoy it!

For the readers who are like me and are suckers for some !GraceKink! well... you’ll be served!

***REMINDER***

*Bold is used to illustrate thoughts*

-Y/N? What are you-

-Tsk tsk tsk. You softly shushed as you managed to stick your index up on the angel's lips. You were slowly crawling at his feet, entirely covered by the bed blanket. You let your fingers slide on the skin of his chest, while pampering his enochian tattoo with kisses. You could swear his abdomen was carved by God himself, without forgetting to mention those sharp hip bones that lead straight towards paradise.

You stopped halfway from your final destination and unzipped his trouser pants carefully pulling them down and leaving Castiel in his skinny orange underwear. You smiled to yourself as you saw his member twitched while you massaged his crotch, still captured inside his clothed prison.

-Relax, my angel. I'll show you what's Heaven on Earth. you whispered as you finally freed his hardening member.

You could feel him getting tense as you felt his legs tremble under you. You wrapped your fingers around his shaft and started to gently stroke it as it gained stiffness. When you were satisfied with his now fully grown erection, you bit your lower lip in apprehension to what you were about to do. You were so minded, you woke up confident and filled with a relentless desire of showing him what you were able to do. You wanted to give Castiel the best oral sex ever, even if you knew you were probably the first conqueror and that he had nothing else to compare it with, you wanted that angelic being to squirm under you.

While you maintained a rhythm with your right hand, you tried to turn up the excitement by licking, blowing and kissing everything but where he needed your mouth to be. You heard his low grunts and you instantly pulled the cover from your head so you could admire the flushed angel beneath you. His lips were partly opened as he looked down at you with lustful eyes. You smirked at him, you felt empowered as you were taking charges of his pleasure. You started off slowly, exploring the terrain using slow wide strokes with your tongue on his manhood, making sure to use a lot of saliva to lube it entirely. You couldn't hear his pants but the way his chest frantically heaved told you he was enjoying this new experience. Enough with the foreplay, you circled your lips around the tip of his cock and took it in your mouth while making sure your tongue flattened every sensible spot as your head travelled up the underside of his member. You felt the angel jerked under you and when you looked up, you caught a sinful glimpse of Castiel with shut eyes and a gaping mouth, completely lost in delight. Thunderstrokes of desire hit you right in the core as your eyes fixed the angel in ecstasy while you kept working your magic. You were stroking with your hand the base of his shaft in unison with your mouth which was going up and down, particularly paying attention to its head since every times your tongue pressed there he would twitch under you.

-Y/N... This- This is-

*low and deep moans/grunts*

As you both started to get caught in the heat of the moment, you reached for your pussy with your free hand to rub your clit as in a way to help building your orgasm as well. You wanted him to know how much you loved doing this for him so you hummed against his cock causing gorgeous vibrations to travel his manhood and he instantly thrusted his hips. The angel continued thrusting inside your mouth and you thought his release was close as you both moaned loudly. You shot him a glare as you suddenly felt his grace working on your throbbing clit, consistently pressurizing and titillating it as if a starving obsessed mouth was covering it. You stopped your movement, leaning your head on his hip as you let yourself get immersed by that blissful wave of pleasure.

-Cas... St-stop. This morning is a-all about y-you. you managed to say aloud without flinching to those incredible sensations that were happening down there.

Everything instantly stopped and you restarted from where you left. It didn't take long before the angel reached the peak of his orgasm. You heard his rasp breath and as you kept working his climax, the room lit up with a powerful white light that would have burned your eyes if you had kept them opened. A millisecond later, the light died as Castiel spilled himself inside your mouth, grunts and enochian words escaping his lips.

You climbed back to the head of the bed and kissed on the pink cheek of your flushed angel.

-We should probably get out of bed. You claimed as you watched the time on your cell phone. Shit, it's almost 2 pm. They gonna think I died in here. you joked while peering back at Cas who had a satisfied grin plastered on his face.

-And I thought angels would have more stamina than that. You threw him a cushion as he laid there, motionless. C'mon get up, Feathers. you giggled

The angel's eyes flashed up opened as soon as the word feather left your mouth. He squinted his eyes at you as you got up from bed.

-What? you added while trying to look innocent. You don't like that nickname? Huh, Feathers?

You barely had time to turn around to gather some pieces of clothing off the floor that he was already fully dressed, while a second earlier he was still naked under the covers. You cocked one of your eyebrows as you tried to maintain the wave of laughs that were threatening to get out, but the seraph rapidly took one of your arms and pulled you close to him, so close that you could taste the smell of him. He looked down at you with severe eyes, the same look he gave you the first night at the bunker when you were arguing in Sam's room.

-Don't call me Feathers, Y/N. Castiel warned with his deep voice.

-Or what? you challenged with the best sterned voice you could afford. Your cocky reply did not even seem to surprise the angel whose lips slightly curved up into a malicious grin.

-Or... you'll see how I tend to punish those who do not listen to my warnings. he answered while spoiling with kisses the hollow of your neck. Your body was now firmly molded against his and you felt a hard bulge pressing on your thigh that almost took your arrogance out from you.

But not quite yet.

-Game on... Feathers.

-Hey there, sleepy head! Dean sarcastically applauded your arrival in the kitchen, interrupting the conversation in which Sam and Castiel were immersed leaning over some papers scattered over the table.

Sam quickly lifted his head and raised his eyebrows as he looked at you from head to toe. Dean smirked as he side-eyed his brother and his friend who both held their breath as they appreciated the view. Cas quickly glanced at Sam and returned his attention back on the papers, flustered. You wore with pride your silky lavender gown which barely covered your physical assets and made sure to sway your hips as you stepped in the kitchen.

-Hey, Y/N. Sam greeted as he regained control of his dangling jaw. Coffee's ready if you want some.

-Oh, okay cool... I smell bacon. Where's the bacon, Dean? you squint your eyes playfully, pointing an accusing finger towards him.

-Sweetheart. Dean shocked in head, in disappointment, you should know by now that bacon is reserved to people who gets up before the sun rises.

-Pfft. Right. As if Sam eats bacon. you huffed as you poured yourself a cup of coffee.

Your felt pairs of eyes lingering on your back as you stood in front of the kitchen counter, which confirmed why you wouldn't usually wear that kind of clothing around fellow hunters. But in this time of war, all weapons were on deck. You peered back at the table and noticed a free spot next to Dean, right in front of Cas and Sam.

-Nice PJs Y/N. Dean cooed jokefully as you sit next to him, a grin smacked on his face. First time I recalled you're a girl since we saw you dancing at that bar. he continued, teasing you.

-Shut up, Dean. you nudged his side without leaving the upset angel out of your sight. Have you told that jerk about what we found yesterday night? you asked Sam as you tried to seem interested but what you really wanted was sitting right in front of you.

- ...Sam?

-Oh uhhh, yes. Sam looked as if he zoned out for a while. Actually, we've been looking more into those Men of letters reports and they're a couple that you should really find interesting. See....

After a couple minutes of discussing with Sam, Dean and Cas, you finally saw the opportunity to carry on with your malicious plan. Dean stood up and stretched himself getting ready to leave.

-Aight, enough with the books for today. I'm out. Gonna go make some errands.

-More like a beer run, huh ? Sam reported with a knowing look, always one step ahead of his big brother.

-No.........Maybe.... Shut up.

You snorted as Dean left the room, leaving you alone with both Sam and Cas. The three of you then returned your attention to the files for a while. A nasty smile grew on your face as you slipped on the bench to be directly in front of the angel who had not spoken a word since you sat at the table and you could feel the excitement rising inside you while you prepared your next move.

-Sam, could you pass me that document please? you implored as you began to subtly rub your right foot against Cas' leg under the table. Your heart hammered in your chest under the tension of being caught.

The hunter pushed the file on the wooden table without drawing his eyes away from his book. You took advantage of Sam's concentration to push further your nasty scheme. The seraph jerked unintentionally as you got bolder, your foot climbing up to his inner thigh and for the first time yet, you met his gorgeous azul eyes which were filled with curiosity. You bit on your lower lip as you looked down to your revealing neckline and let the flow of naughty thoughts submerge your mind. Castiel's eyes followed yours and he couldn't help the predatory look on his face as he understood what was on your mind.

‘'Castiel, I want you. I need you, need to feel your body pressed against mine.''

You elegonted your foot so you could reach his crotch and you felt his trouser pants getting tighter under your touch.

''Two can play that game, Blossom.''

You smiled when you heard the echo on his voice in your mind but you couldn't care less even after he warned you. You were savoring this instant.

''I can feel your warmth under the sol of my foot, angel. I know you want me too. I know you want to bear me down to that table and fuck the stubbornness out of me.''

The angel blinked lethargically as he contempted your wicked grin. You didn't know if he would jump across the table or just magically disappear but you knew he was on the verge of exploding, which made your buzz even more agreeable.

'' I can still feel your thick chapped lips scrapping my skin as you kissed my naked breasts. I c- I ca-hmm...I... what the???''

You knocked your knee under the table as you abruptly straightened up on your seat and took away your foot from Castiel's.

'' You want me to fuck you in front of Sam, Y/N? Show him that you're mine?''

You tried your best to keep a neutral facial expression as you felt Castiel's grace unrelentingly shove into you. His sudden boldness caught you off guard and a subtle victory smile was drawn on his face as you squirmed on your seat, desperately trying to seal yourself by squeezing your thighs together.

You took a deep, long breath to release the steam that was accumulating inside you. You haven't said your last word.

You were mentally plotting your next move when you were suddenly taken aback as Sam stood up out of the blue.

-I'm starving. Y/N, you want something? Cas?

You shook your head. You could not even pronounce a simple no without fearing of letting go one of the ravenous whimpers that threatened to break out from your throat at any moment.

-No. thank you, Sam. Castiel calmly stated. You squint your eyes at the seraph as he answered, how could he remain marble like that? You gathered what little strength was left in you.

-You know Feathers doesn't eat, Sammy. Why even bother asking. you sneered back at the angel who clenched his jaw as his fingers drummed tempestuously on the table.

You both stared deeply at each other and from Sam's point of view you were about to rip each others throats. If he only knew...

-Hey guys, bring it down a notch. Please, I know you can't stand each other but, no fighting. the hunter implored as he made himself a sandwich.

He sighed as he returned his attention back to his lunch when he understood it was a lost cause. You turned back to face the angel a proud smile on your lips, blinking innocently as if nothing happened.

'' No need to play with words when in my case, I can just... brush'' you felt a shiver down your spine as invisible feathers grazed your skin.

''Grip'' you gasped as hasty hands grasped your inner thighs and pushed them opened.

''Kiss'' you craned your head to the side and your eyes closed as you felt lips pecking all over the skin of your neck.

''Massage'' you bit your lip as you felt hands palming your breasts.

''Pinch... Lick...Suck...''

All those feelings at once was more than you could handle. You were in conflict with your own body as you tried your best to suppress the involuntary movements which responded to his grace. You heard the heavy metal door close shut in the background, indicating that Dean should be back but you couldn't care less as you got more and more worked up by that unheeding angel.

''Finger...Slide...Twirl...''

-ENOUGH. you barked as you roughly stood up and every sensations instantly died.

You rushed outside of the kitchen leaving a dumbfounded Sam and a more than pleased Castiel behind.

- What the hell happened to Y/N? I heard her shout all the way to the front. Dean asked his brother as he uncapped two bottles of beer and shove him one.

Sam shrugged as he bit into his sandwich. Castiel left just after Dean arrived without mentioning where he was heading to.

-I don't know... I think Cas made her upset...

-They had a go at it again? I thought they learnt to get along. Dean huffed as he ruffled through his hair with one hand while trying to subtly shove Sam’s plate with the other.

-Actually, do you wanna check up on her? Just... I think Cas might have followed her. Sam demanded his brother as he scolded the back of his hand off his meal with a slap.

Dean rolled his eyes and got up snorting.

-And I thought it was you that had a crush on her. he hissed as he left the kitchen.

------

As Dean was walking towards your door, he noticed that the door was cracked open.

“Hmm….maybe I should burst into her room and scare this little asshat out of her skin”

Dean; feeling proud of himself for his soon to be mischievous behavior, he heard a commotion from your room and stopped dead in his tracks.

“What the hell is going on…..is Cas in there with her?! Are they fighting?! Shit this could be bad”

Without a moment of hesitation Dean entered flight or fight mode and bursted into her room.

- WHAT THE HELL IS GOING…….on? Dean is left standing in the middle of room completely dumbfounded to what is before his eyes.

Cas had you pinned against the wall with your shirt off, and your legs locked around the angel’s waist. You both peered at the intruder who is now left with his Jaw wide opened.

- Son.Of.A.Bitch

EXTRA :

#castiel fanfiction #cas x reader smut #castiel x reader #castiel #subcas #castiel supernatural #castiel smut #reader insert #Supernatural smut #supernatural fanfiction

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trashassassin · 6 years ago

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How to Smut 101: Getting Over the Hump (heh) and Just Doing It

Hello friends! This little guide comes to you from someone who has literally been creating original stories in some form or another since before they could hold a pencil. So well over a decade. And yet, I’ve only really delved into the land of smut writing in the past few years. This was a genre that I, and many creators I’m sure, were scared to touch. It was too difficult, too embarrassing, too easy to get wrong.

And yet, I believe I’ve gotten a pretty good handle not only on writing it effectively but also dissolving the embarrassment surrounding the subject, at least in my own mind. Obviously everyone’s methods for writing are different, so this will be less of a guide and more of an outline full of things to help you prepare for your jump into the world of smut for the first (or maybe twentieth after a bunch of scrapped attempts if you’re like me) time.

The first thing that really helped me was changing how I thought about smut.

Sex scenes always had this mystical, untouchable quality to them whenever I thought about writing them. They were set apart from the rest of the story, placed on a sort of pedestal, a pedestal that had my thought processes heading places like “alright, now it’s time for the Sex Scene™”. Sometimes I would just throw random sex scenes into a story because I felt as thought they had to be there. Which brings me to my first real point.

Sex scenes must have a reason to exist!

Unless you’re writing a plot-what-plot situation, a sex scene must be in your story for a reason! This applies more to published novels or longer fics, which is why I’m posting it first as this one in particular won’t apply to many of the people who clicked on this post.

Imagine this a bit differently. What if your story was progressing along normally when, all of a sudden, you threw in a random, pointless scene about your characters stopping to get coffee? Nothing plot-relevant happens; no important characters interactions happen; there are no special items hidden in the coffee shop. Your characters just decided that they needed a pick-me-up and sit around quietly sipping coffee for 1,000 or so words. This would be really boring, right?

Well, an unnecessary sex scene is the same way. I’m not naming any names here, but there is an exceptionally popular series of erotic novels out there that makes this mistake all the time! If you have pointless sex scenes sprinkled into your story every chapter, it’s going to become boring and grating in a hurry.

Sex scenes must be consistent with the tone of the story, happen naturally over the course of the plot, and/or teach us something important about the characters involved in order to have a true place. If these things are not present, I find it’s best to reconsider if it’s really best to have a sex scene during this point in the story or in the story at all.

Sex scenes are just like any other scene!

Going back to the whole stopping for coffee analogy, a sex scene is just another scene in your story. Now you might be thinking to yourself, “well, duh!”, but this realization was actually a big turning point for me.

I realized the main responsibility we have in writing is to take mundane, everyday activities and present them in a new or interesting way. Think of an adventure story. A group of characters going on an adventure to find the Golden Sword of Wisdom is the exciting version of you and your friends driving down to your local Walmart to obtain Golden Magnum Ice Cream Bars.

Or, consider the Harry Potter series. It takes going to school, something every person within its targeted age group is required to do, and turns it into a fresh and, dare I say, magical experience.

Instead of simply providing a blow-by-blow (pun intended), textbook-style retelling of a sexual encounter, it’s important to put your own unique spin on it.

Play with your readers’ senses.

A huge part of what makes any scene great is the ability of the reader to immerse themselves into it. And you as the author can make this much easier for them by describing it to them in as much detail as possible, how everything contained within it looks, feels, smells, and tastes.

And sexual scenes are certainly no exception to this. In fact, I’d say creating an enjoyable sensory experience is of the utmost importance.

Consider things like how does your character’s partner smell? How do their surroundings smell? Are there any candles burning, a window through which fresh, or perhaps not-so-fresh, air is streaming? Have their clothes or sheets just been washed and smell of a particular scent of detergent?

Also consider how things feel. Is your character in a cold or warm place? Perhaps you could describe a feeling of goosebumps rising on the skin or of sweat dripping down their back. How do the sheets feel beneath their fingertips? How does the brick wall feel at their back? What is it like to be pressed up against a window pane?

What sounds are present, besides the obvious ones? Is there music playing? A fan going? Cars outside? Perhaps the sound of footsteps are present as they desperately try to keep quiet in a crowded place.

Also consider your characters’ own personalities, as well as how much experience they have in sexual situations. How do they feel about their partner? Are they excited or apprehensive? Are they overwhelmed with love or simply looking to get their rocks off? All of these are important things to consider when creating a well-rounded scene.

Your scene does not have to be vulgar, but it can be!

You may think that every sex scene must be contain levels of vulgarity reserved for professional porn movies, but this is simply not the case. As I said before, take into account the personality of the characters involved. A shy character would not likely use words like “cock” and “pussy”, where as a more bold or experienced character very well may.

And if you’re not comfortable with using such words in your writing, well, now is the time to step outside of your comfort zone! As long as it is appropriate for the characters involved, of course.

But regardless of boldness or levels of experience, some are simply just not into super vulgar dirty talk. This post by Smut 101 is a perfect example of dirty talk of a more romantic sort for the more hopeless romantic types that may appear in your stories.

Keep things accurate but not necessarily realistic.

You always see people criticizing sex in books and movies for not being realistic enough, for not involving vagina-having characters taking a piss afterward to prevent UTIs, for a lack of condoms, for both characters reaching orgasm at the same time. You know what I say to that? I say that sexual scenes are meant as an escape, as a fantasy, and that such realistic touches would ruin the illusion of the perfect scenario the reader is looking for.

That being said, if everything is sunshine and rainbows all the time, you’ll once again find yourself with a boring scene on your hands. It’s alright to include moments where your characters knock their heads together or say something so ridiculous it makes the other person laugh. Sex can and should be fun and, when the moment calls for it, a bit goofy.

Something that you cannot compromise on, however, is accuracy. If you’re delving into a particular fetish or act you’re not familiar with, it’s best to do your research beforehand, something else that the author of the aforementioned exceptionally popular series of erotic novels seems to have neglected. Watching videos, reading articles, and browsing forums can all be useful in familiarizing yourself with the subject.

Even if you’re a virgin, this does not bar you from writing well-written sex scenes, I assure you! If someone was required to experience something in order to write about it, the vast majority of authors would be up shit creek without a paddle.

As with any genre, it never hurts to familiarize yourself with it before you start writing it. Reading highly praised romance novels and other peoples’ erotic fics is a good place to start if you’re looking for inspiration or guidance.

Don’t be afraid to draw from your own experiences.

If you have had a bit of sexual experience, it’s not a bad idea to draw inspiration from this. Remembering specific sensory experiences you’ve had and applying them to your writing can help enhance the realism of a scene.

It’s also not forbidden to include your own personal fantasies in your stories. Just be careful that all of your erotic stories don’t turn out exactly the same. While we all have our own individual tastes and preferences, it’s good to step outside of that to keep your stories fresh.

Some general tips for you as a writer.

Writing smut is going to feel awkward if you’re not used to it. And even if you are used to it, feelings of embarrassment may still come up on occasion. This is normal. Do not let it dissuade you from pursuing your creative endeavors. Even if the embarrassment over writing lewd scenes never fully goes away, it will get easier with time. I promise.

Whenever I’m writing any kind of scene whether it be exciting, emotional, or, yes, lewd, I always like to select some music to set the tone in my mind. Spotify and YouTube are my go-to sources. If you’re settling down to write a smut scene, find yourself a sexy playlist to get your brain in the zone.

Your mood is important as well. Obviously you don’t have to be dripping with lust to write this sort of scene, but being upset, tired, or ill can definitely put a damper on your ability to get into the proper mindset.

Never try to force writing of any sort if you’re not feeling inspired. As that old saying goes, writing is like a fart: if you have to force it, it’s probably shit. The original quote pertains to relationships, but I think it’s pretty fitting here as well. Should this happen, don’t scrap the project entirely. Simply take a break, play or watch the property involving the character(s) you’re writing about, read some of your favorite authors or fic writers, read some guides like this one. And then come back when you feel suitably inspired.

In conclusion...

As I said before, this is less of a guide and more of an outline. Everyone has different methods for putting out their best content. Perhaps listening to music distracts you or the writing of others sticks in your head and hampers your ability to create original work.

And that’s completely fine.

That being said, I hope that you guys found this useful in instilling you with the confidence you need to finally begin writing smut! There can never be too many smut writers in the world. If there’s something in particular that you’d like advice on, leave a comment and I’ll try to address it as soon as I can. Thanks for reading, everyone! Now, go forth with the faith that you can finally do the thing !!!

#writing #smut #writing tips #fanfiction #how to write sex scenes

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