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#feels like its been 2 centuries. ive veen trying to write abt brighton but i dont think im like. Feeling abt it and idk if i can or will
pepprs · 4 years
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just remembered my mandatory quarantine ends tonight and after this im just like. self isolating the way everyone else is so after like 10 tonight i can officially say i survived returning home from study abroad
#not that theres rly a difference but u know. its an achievement i guess. also im so sad like can u believe it was only two weeks ago and it#feels like its been 2 centuries. ive veen trying to write abt brighton but i dont think im like. Feeling abt it and idk if i can or will#@ this ppijt like. maybe i missed my chance to grieve? or maybe its just so big and so much bigger than me that i still cant wrap my head#around it. i know im very lucky and there are ways of seeing this where its like.. this opens the door for me to come back on my own terms#and in my own time someday in the future and 7 weeks was a lot of timr some ppl didnt get at all. but pike. idk i lost a lot. i went from#having more freedom and independence than i knew what to do with (and i was just figuring out what to do with it!!!) to having none at all#and that has been hard. and i know there r ppl out there... ppl i Know Personally! who would so much rather be in my situation than be in#theirs where like. theyre alone and lonely. or their entire semester abroad got ripped away. and things could be so much worse. but the#dituation im in is hard. like i love my family but its hard and i am just gtowing more and more incompatible witn them i think and its hard#to be cooped up here and scrapping for all the things i want all the time. and i miss brighton a lot and i miss work a lot and i shouldnt#but i really do and. god idk what im saying none of this is abt me. but i just hope this ends soon. cuz this has been hard#purrs#brighton
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