#feelings like no other fan or contestant ever sold

[nightguide]

autistics taking over the world by thought reduction: you're too lazy Hollywood to SAVE MATT DAMON (and now they're all conspiracy theorists.. uh oh)

that but like they're now animated to think twice as fast as you do by literally living their lives (the plot hole for Hole in the wall irl)

west end vs broadway

now give us back Ant and Dec's Saturday Night Takeaway controversy (nobody won Andy Peters prize of a giveaway which ends with a Sunday dream) so you would have intuitively talked to Ant and Dec about the Glee cast and they were in on it like no other gameshow existed but primarily working for the government at the same time. get a break now cuz you're all going on a takeaway getaway!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[msbigredmachine]

Netflix & [Redacted] - (Jey Uso/OC)

Is this the most awesomely stressful movie night ever? 😩

PAIRING: Jey Uso x Plus Size!OC

Word Count: 7.3k words

A/N: I'm back to talking too much 😖😂 I've missed writing Jey. Hope it's not too long. Enjoy!

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It's been a quiet Friday night so far, just the two of you, the 52-inch screen TV showing a random movie he picked on Netflix. But as it stands, neither of you are watching it at the moment, or anytime soon for that matter - what you're doing right now is far more...entertaining.

Laid up together on the sunken sectional in his living room, you indulge in each other's mouths. The fluffy blanket meant to be keeping you warm is discarded somewhere; the sensual heat currently radiating between you doing a stellar job already. The sexual tension has been simmering all night, been simmering since you first laid eyes on each other months ago.

You've never dared to get involved with a client...until him. Having started to tire of the male species in general, this insanely attractive man seemingly appeared from the hidden depths of your wildest dreams. It was at an open house viewing for one of the luxury apartments you were selling in midtown Atlanta. A movie cannot do justice to showcase the electricity that sizzled between you two when he walked through the door. He was charming and funny, fun to talk to, and incredibly sexy. You could tell he was a bad boy, and honestly, you've always had a thing for bad boys. Three other potential clients came in but you hardly paid any attention to them, wrapped up in your lengthy conversation with him and discovering how much you had in common. It culminated with his check in your hand and your phone number in his. Now, just a few months later, you're letting him kiss all over you in his newly furnished apartment that you sold to him, 100% sure that you're finally going all the way tonight.

His large hand smooths along your bare thigh and briefly toys with the hem of your lilac boy shorts. He coaxes a breathless gasp from you when his fingers splay over your ass cheek, gathering as much of the expansive flesh as he can, while he keeps your back warm with his other hand tucked inside the Niutat hoodie that you "stole" from him.

"Mmm, you kiss so good, girl," he coos, complimenting his praises with another kiss.

"So do you," you giggle against his mouth and hold his wrist resting on your butt. "I'm still getting used to how handsy you are."

"Don't mind me, baby. Your body is so fuckin' sexy," he replies, shaking off your grip to keep touching on you. "All this extra juicy thickness for me to play with, I know that's right..."

It feels like you've hit the jackpot with Jey Uso. He is 100% your type; big and brown-skinned, strong and drop-dead gorgeous. Yet, so different from the others. He's a fighter and a nomad, literally and figuratively. Boatloads of charisma. Deceptively smart with a way with words and the ability to get people to do whatever he wants. You've seen him work his magic first-hand with his fans and wrestling audiences everywhere, and admittedly you've fallen under his spell too. You're immensely attracted to him, and though you've tried to take things slow, you're all but certain that all of that will change tonight, and you're in equal parts excited and terrified.

Yet, your bold actions take over as you cheekily nibble on his ear and rub your leg back and forth on the crotch of his thin shorts. This drags another growl from him as his eyes darken menacingly.

"You tryna start somethin' huh. Best believe I'ma finish it," he warns, licking his full lips revealing his silver grill peeking between them.

"I ain't startin' nothin'," you contest, your breath hitching when he lightly squeezes your ass and then smacks it.

"Yeah right, you rubbin' up on me like this, kissin' on me...I know you tryna tell Daddy sumn'..."

Fuck. The whole 'Daddy' thing does a lot of unholy things to your loins. Even though sex hasn't happened yet, the makeout sessions are out of this world. All your dates have ended with passionate kissing and touching, with him having to say goodbye and leaving your lips swollen, your clothing rumpled, your heart beating like crazy and your pussy drowning from the salacious foreplay you keep subjecting yourself to. "I just like kissing you, that's all," you murmur shyly with a blush.

"I like kissin' you too, ma. You got the softest." Kiss. "Sexiest." Kiss. "Sweetest lips I've ever tasted." One more kiss. "I'd like to do other things to you, but you frontin'," he adds.

Sucking your teeth, you sit up straight and glance up at the ceiling to avoid the heat of his stare. "Stop, we do stuff..." you retort quietly.

"Like what? This?" His hands sneak back under your hoodie to cup your breasts, rubbing them in circular motions. Your stiff nipples tighten some more from his touch, straining almost uncomfortably through the confines of your bra. "We should be doing more, baby. I know you want to," he says, making his low, deep syrupy voice even sexier.

"You are so dangerous. I should be runnin' far away from you, ya know."

"And yet you're here, with your overnight bag in my room and wearin' them tiny ass booty shorts with no panties. You exactly where you wanna be," he counters smoothly. "By the way, got rid of your booty call yet? What that fool's name again?"

He just has to bring Lawrence up, doesn't he? "Got rid of your hoes yet? What's their names?" you shoot right back.

Honestly, the less said about your failed relationships, the better. It was complicated, for both of you. Lawrence is an ex you've muddied the waters with by sleeping with him occasionally. Jey recently finalized his divorce from a woman he'd been with since college and was now sowing his wild oats, garnering a number of side pieces in the process. You 'met' two of them at his cookout party a couple of weeks back. Apparently they had shown up unannounced, his sister-in-law Trinity informed you. Trin had taken a shine to you and was kind enough to fill you in on your potential boyfriend's dalliances. You don't share your men under any circumstances, but if that apparatus between his legs is half as talented as his mouth and hands, then you're willing to forgo that caveat.

"I know you forgot all about your man when you first laid eyes on me. I saw the way you looked at me," Jey boasts.

"Only cuz you were lookin' right back," you say. "I just couldn't believe a man could have such pretty eyes," you elaborate, knowing that will make him smile and it does; his dimples deepen and make him look cuter. He is so handsome, and you are finding him harder and harder to resist.

"I remember that dress you was wearing. That big ol' booty was cryin' out to me, bruh. Beggin' me to squeeze and manhandle it in all the right ways. I wanted to bend you over that kitchen counter over there, give you da bidness, know what I mean?"

"And I remember I couldn't stop watching your lips move when you were talking to me," you add, inwardly swooning as you reminisce. "It don't help that you got this habit of licking them every five seconds..."

"I know somewhere I can lick," he drawls. He's pinning those hypnotic eyes on you now, again, looking at you all hot and sensual like he wants to devour you. With his fingers, he gently pushes your cheeks together to part your mouth and slide his tongue inside. Thick and warm, it lavishes the insides of your mouth. Before Jey, kissing was never this...intimate...for you. Nothing you experienced before remotely matched the passionate scenes in romantic films that swept the characters off their feet. Jey's kisses do just that. They are the kind that make you forget your name and sweep you off the ground never to come down again.

"How 'bout we finish the movie, hmm?" you suggest breathlessly.

"Later," he dismisses, and pats his thighs. "Sit on my lap and face me, beautiful."

The nerves rush through your body, but you're currently fueled by wine and want, so you oblige him. As you straddle him, you fight back a moan as his erection nudges persistently against your core. His arm winds around your waist to pull you in, kissing you with the same measured, drugging nature with a little bit of aggressiveness mixed in this time. His hands run up your spine and then back down to grasp your cheeks, squeezing them each time. He growls into your mouth as your fingers trail a path from his chest, up his broad shoulders and all the way to his blue-tinged mullet, tugging the back of his hair.

"Mmm, yeah, get rough with me, baby," he moans. He loves it when you yank and pull at him when you kiss, it always proves his point that you want to fuck as much as he does. His thick tongue pokes out, darting beneath the seam of your lips, and you catch it with a long suck that has him moaning his pleasure. In retaliation, both hands make their way inside your shorts to grab your round ass, his fingertips grazing your pussy lips from behind.

"I want you, Y/N. I want that pussy." he murmurs.

His dick is growing harder against you, and it feels so big that you're unable to stop yourself from grinding down on it. His grip is firm and possessive as he rocks you on top of him like you are riding him. You moan needily from the building sensations, your arousal spiraling out of control already. You make an attempt to climb off of him, but he grunts in protest and holds you down on him. Though you're on the heavier side of the weight spectrum, he's still bigger than you and definitely much stronger, and he's not letting you escape at all.

"Fuck," you gasp against his lips, feeling his long fingers dig into the soft, bare flesh of your backside as you dry-hump each other. They breach the crack of your ass before teasing the outer lips of your pussy from the back. Before he can sink one finger inside you, you manage to tear yourself away and distance yourself, your lips parted and panting.

"I'm scared, okay?" you blurt out.

For a long moment, Jey stares at you, his expression unreadable. "Scared of what?" he asks patiently.

You cringe as his hands clench into fists on his lap, sensing his palpable frustration. Shit, why did you have to open your fucking mouth? Shaking your head, you look away. "Never mind," you mumble, feeling stupid already.

"Hey, don't do that," he chides you firmly, though his eyes are kind and curious. "Tell me what's wrong. I won't know how to help if you don't."

A small, nervous sigh escapes your lips. Right now you want to get your stuff and run home never to come back, but you steel your nerves and open up. "I'm scared of the disappointment. Sex-wise, I mean. Me being disappointed or you being disappointed or both. Lawrence also talked all that shit to get me to have sex with him again," you ramble, making a motion with your hands to mimic talking, "Bragged and bragged about what I was missing and all the shit he was gonna do to me. It's been weeks and not once has he made me come...I have to do it myself afterwards every time. He said he was still getting used to fucking a big girl again. Yes, I know he's a punk bitch and I need to get rid of him. But I feel like I've forgotten how to have good sex and I don't want more of the same here."

There, you've said it. You can't bring herself to look at Jey, and your cheeks heat up under his scrutinizing gaze. You know he's assessing your words and he probably thinks you're a weirdo and you won't blame him if he does.

"That fucking dumbass."

Stunned, you look back up at him, intrigued by the way he shakes his head like a disappointed father. "Ay, you gotta send that jabroni packin', uce," he replies, "You can't be wasting premium pussy on that lame ass motherfucker. You need a man that know how to take care of you like you deserve. No real man gets off and leaves their lady hangin'. That's fuckin' wack, bruh."

He reaches up to cup your chin between his fingers, his gaze soft and tender. "Now that you've told me this, I wanna fuck you more than ever," he continues, "I wanna take my good ol' time withchu, so I know what you want and how you like it. I want you to feel so good you won't see that nut coming. I can show you a whole lotta things, pretty girl, but only if you let me."

Wow. You absorb his strong confident words that temporarily make you forget your fears. Is he telling the truth? Will he be able to give you what you truly need?

Before you can respond, a sudden loud moan that doesn't come from either of you startles you. You look to the TV and your jaw drops as you witness the main characters of the movie going at it in a bathroom stall in what looks like a nightclub.

"Damn, they fuckin' fuckin'," Jey comments. And he's right. For fake sex, it looks realistic as hell, with the actress' hands on the wall, her exposed breasts bouncing, her moans throaty and desperate as the guy pounds her aggressively from behind. You squirm in your seat as the scene seems to go on and on. This is surely a sign for you and Jey to finally get it on. You dare to peek at him to catch his reaction. He looks fascinated, a lopsided smirk on his face, his eyes dark and filled with unbridled desire. Your eyes fall to the outline of his crotch, his erection twisted to the side thanks to your earlier shenanigans and what he's watching now.

"Okaaaaay, I think it's time for more wine," you announce loudly, jumping up and grabbing both your empty wine glasses. 

Helping himself to some popcorn, Jey eyes you with a smirk as you scurry across the open plan layout of the room. Seeing you flustered is only making him want you more. With just the kitchen lights turned on he can see you more clearly. Your thick thighs and fat juicy ass are barely hiding that chocolate pussy he wants to feast on and dig out so badly. "Why you runnin', girl?" he calls out.

"I'm not," you lie, doing your best to block out the sultry moans and slapping skin coming from the TV as you pick up a bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon. "Which one do you want? White or red?"

"Only one thing I want right now, baby," he answers unabashedly.

You blush profusely and shake your head, "Chill, Uce."

"Call me Uce again and we gon' have problems," he warns.

That surprises you. "Thought you said your friends call you Uce."

"Not friends that I wanna fuck."

Good Lord. In his defense, Jey has made no bones about how much he wants you and you're not sure you can hold out for much longer. This is the man you've been hoping for, the man you've desperately needed to make you feel alive again. Lawrence made you question your confidence when he acted like he was doing you a favor by sleeping with you. But Jey seems different; he seems genuinely interested in making you come and making you feel good. It's just a case of you being brave enough to give in to him completely.

"Earth to Y/N."

You nearly jump out of your skin at the sound of his voice right behind you, which is quickly followed by his hard body pressing against your back. Of course you've spaced out thinking about sex with him. It's not the first time.

"You good?" he asks.

"Yeah, sorry, one glass of red wine coming right up," you stutter, struggling to keep a steady hand to pour some into his glass. His dick is hard against your ass, no thanks to the smut playing on TV, with the couple now having sex inside a car. He's all up on you, making you feel every plane and every ridge on his hard, chiseled body. His muscular arms wrap you in a big hug, at one with the fleshy softness of your body as he kisses your ear.

"You're turned on, huh? Seein' them two fucking like that? That why you ran?" he whispers, his baritone voice laced with mischief. "Want me to fuck you like that?"

The answer on the tip of your tongue evaporates as he reaches down to squeeze the chunk of skin on your inner thigh. His lips find the nape of your neck, and you move almost on autopilot as you sweep your goddess braids to the side to allow him full access to your throat. His wet, open-mouthed kisses, suckling on your pulse like a damn vampire, are driving you crazy. His large body envelopes yours, pressing your stomach into the counter, his legs purposely spread to grind himself against your backside. The throbbing sensation in your nipples and your clit makes you gulp down both your glasses in one go.

Jey's hand goes down the front of your shorts, your body going slack as he rubs the wetness that has pooled between your legs. You can't stop the throaty sounds that he loves so much from escaping. You're a soaked mess and for Jey, it's like a shark smelling blood.

"The movie, remember?" you breathe, your resolve slipping away as you look back at him, his lustful grin making your heart pound.

"Fuck the movie, let's make our own," he says. Your mouths collide again, kissing so deeply and hungrily it's almost impossible to tell who ends where and who starts where. This is nothing like the other comparably tame liplocks from earlier. He's telling you exactly what he wants and he plans to get it now.

Turning you around, he descends slowly to his knees before you and takes his time dragging your shorts down your legs. You look on helplessly, your anxiety battling with your desire as he palms your thigh and props your right leg over his shoulder, licking his lips at the sight of your bare folds glistening for him. He breathes you in, basking in the scent he plans to familiarize himself with. He looks up at you, and what you see in his eyes dries up your throat.

"Pretty ass pussy. Lemme eat it up, babe," he growls.

He pushes his face against your center and penetrates you with his tongue. Crying out in pleasure, you grip the sides of the counter for balance as the pressure from his mouth ramps up immediately, his long fingers molding your ass, his breath warming your core, his tongue finding every crevice you own with devastating strokes as he licks up every drop of your arousal for him.

With trembling hands, you lift the hem of your hoodie up to your chest while weaving your other fingers through the soft waves of his hair, holding him to you. He's doing the most delicious things to you, coaxing your juices out of your pussy. You can feel his tongue inside you, his mouth getting wetter and sloppier with your juices and his saliva running down your thigh. You want to die as he twirls his tongue all over your protruding clit, his pace unhurried as he holds your leg tight, smothering his face between your thighs, and that familiar warmth starts to brew in your stomach.

"Oh my god, Jey..."

The pitch of your moans increases. You keep squirming, trying to pull away, but he clamps his arms around your waist to hold you still. You're not going anywhere. He knows you're close from the way you throb on his tongue and picks up the pace, lapping wildly at your folds then gently biting your clit. "That's it, come in my mouth," he orders huskily.

"Ohhhhhh...." you squeal, throwing your head back as you flood his mouth with your release. This is the hardest you've orgasmed in about a year and your mind is blown. Jey remains glued to you, his dangerous mouth making you quiver again as you already feel another approaching. You were confident he would get the job done, but he has delivered tenfold in just a matter of minutes. You have a feeling you'll be retiring your vibrator real soon.

The sounds coming out of you as you come a second time are otherworldly, making Jey harder than he's been in a long time. You're definitely the sweetest he's ever tasted. It's there and then he decides he can't hold back anymore. He needs to have you, now.

Dragging you away from the counter, he lifts your body, limp and weak from pleasure, into his arms effortlessly, carrying you back to the living room and sitting carefully on the massive couch with you on top of him.

"You ready for me, baby?" he asks with a predatory look in his eyes as he tugs the hem of your hoodie.

"Mm-hmm," you reply, allowing him to drag the garment up and above your head. Your gaze falls on the small square foil packet that's appeared in his right hand. This is really happening.

"Say that shit with your full chest, look me in the eye. You sure you can handle me?" he questions.

"The question is, Mr. Main Event, can you handle all this?" Leaning back a little, you spread your legs far apart and pat your exposed pussy with a raised eyebrow, the wine in your system ramping up your bravery as you taunt him.

Jey rebuttals with a full, open-mouthed kiss that curls your toes as you taste yourself. The embrace intensifies while he unhooks your bra from behind, letting his calloused fingers play with the softness of your breasts. You moan at the urgency in his touch, the feel of his clothed dick bumping against your bare, wet center. He pulls away, not taking his eyes off you as he whips his t-shirt over his head, revealing all those beautiful tribal tattoos he shows off on TV, his taut abs sprinkled with a little hair that trails down south. You move off him to pull his shorts down his hips, and you zero in on the large wet stain on his gray cotton briefs. You almost can't believe it's you that's done that to him. He unwraps the last of it, and you take in the glorious vision of his briefs falling away too, allowing his cock to spring free.

"Shit," you exclaim.

Jey looks down at himself, then back at you. "Good shit or bad shit?" he smirks.

"Both." You can't take your eyes off it. Long, caramel brown and girthy with a curve to it, destined to reach that spot inside you that will make you cry. Fuck. It's going to hurt so good; you can already feel it sliding inside...

"I wanna suck it, Daddy," you tell him sweetly, closing up the space between his sturdy thighs. You pick up his dick at the base; it's as heavy as it looks, thick and veiny and yet smooth at the same time. You like the way it twitches when you stroke it lightly in your hand, and like it even more when he moans in reaction. You wind your tongue around the slit of his head to lick up the precum hanging there, and then wrap your lips around his flesh. He fills your mouth right away, stretching it dangerously. It's a tight fit, but lucky for you...and him...you love a challenge.

As you swallow him up, a deep, contented groan escapes Jey's body, making him toss his head back and sink into the sectional as his dick sinks further into your mouth. Your mouth is so warm, your lips so soft as they glide expertly up and down his length. With another moan, his hand curves around the back of your head, clenching his fingers in your braids when your lips dare to meet his pelvis. Your tongue lashes around the base before you release him, a long string of saliva trailing after you as you pull back to breathe for a second, then dive back in.

He loves the sight of you on your knees before him, torturing him with your dizzying oral prowess. His stomach clenches as your other hand slips over his balls, massaging them lovingly in your palm, making him pulse in your mouth. Catching his glazed-over gaze, you flutter your lashes innocently at him, then flash him a devilish wink as you take every inch of his cock down your throat, savoring the taste of him. His hand tightens in your hair, as do his balls when you start to suck him harder and stroke him faster, and he knows he won't last long if he lets you carry on like this.

"Damn girl, I ain't tryna nut yet." He tugs your hair hard enough to pull you off him, his breath catching at the sight of his dick plopping wetly against his abs with your saliva all over it. He puts the latex on as quickly as possible and meets your famished eyes. "Come up here, babe, come fuck me," he beckons to you with a crook of his finger.

You kiss along his dick, up his abs and chest, and then his neck. He helps you straddle him and covers your mouth with a slew of smoldering kisses. Using his free hand to grasp his dick at the base, he lines it up with your pussy, grunting softly when he feels your wetness against his hard dick. You press your chest into his, your ass lowering to welcome him inside you. Your jaw drops as your pussy stretches around him. His girth and length are invasive in the best way, and you whine softly as he slowly guides your hips down to meet him halfway. "Fuck..." you gasp.

"Too much?" he asks with a shaky voice, just as affected as you are by your joining.

Swallowing hard, you ignore the quivering of your thighs and shake your head. "I can take it," you breathe. At least, you hope you can.

"Good girl," he groans and runs his hands along your sides, "C'mon, ride me."

His hold on your waist is firm as you rise and fall on his erection, lifting up and down, circling your hips with each drop down. Your teeth sink into your bottom lip hard enough to draw blood. He's so deep inside you; it's a miracle you're not screaming down his apartment. He can't resist burying his face in your soft titties, practically motorboarding them while you work him, looking down occasionally at the way your hips roll. He returns your hazy stare with a cocky smirk, flashing his grill between his full lips.

"Jey..."

"Yeah, baby? Feel good?" he asks with a breathless kiss. You reply by adjusting into a squat, gripping the backrest behind him as you take the reins from him and ride him harder. Jey meets you thrust for thrust, grunting as your tight little pussy pulls and tugs around him. You tuck your face in his neck, moaning into his skin. His strong arms hold you close, keeping you chest to chest. One large hand scrapes down to your right ass cheek, smacking the skin hard as you bounce up and down on his cock. Both of you groan and grind together, time and space ceasing to exist as you lose yourselves in each other.

"You feel incredible, baby, so damn tight," Jey whispers, his palms running from the back of your neck down your spine, over your hips and resting under your thighs. "Damn, I'm deep in this pussy, girl, make me wanna take this damn rubber off..."

You moan at his dirty words, your palms planted on his hard pecs and moaning even louder as he steers you on his dick, his fingers pressed into your hip bones as he grinds you onto him, stimulating your sweet spot with a delicious precision that unlocks you again.

"Uuuuugh," your voice sounds strangled as another orgasm washes over you. Your body trembles from head to toe from how hard you're coming all over his cock. Jey chuckles against your throat, his lips brushing soft kisses over your thrumming flesh. Your fingers thread through his hair, your face pressed to his to catch your breath as he rolls you onto your back.

As he kneels between your spread legs, your mouth waters as he grabs his dick and massages it, spreading your cum all over the length, his heavy breathing matching yours. The lights emanating from the TV work wonders for his caramel skin and the muscles adorning his frame. His beautiful dark irises sparkle like fireworks as he taps your pussy with his dick, making you jerk from the sudden shock of it. Your legs recoil instinctively, but he pushes your thigh down to your chest and does it again and again, until all you can hear over your moans is the splashing of your pussy from the pressure of his heavy cock. It sounds so good and gushy, just the way he wants it. He hoses you down with that sexy ass smirk of his, causing you to whimper with a desperate need for him to be inside you again.

"Mm-hmm," he murmurs with appreciative eyes, "You look so hot, babe, buck naked, laid out on my couch with this pretty cunt wet and open. I should punish your fine ass for holding out on me, but it's a'ight. We both gettin' what we want, and that's this big dick deep in this fat pussy. You gon' get every inch of Daddy's dick."

He pulls you towards him, draping your legs over his. He grabs his dick again and guides himself slowly into you, one inch at a time. Your hand rests on his hip, your eyes fixated as you watch him sink deeper and deeper. Your legs curl around his waist, your heels digging into his backside as he starts moving. Your head tips backwards with a wanton moan; the angle with which he's fucking you has you feeling like he's in your stomach. The base of his cock grinds sensually against your clit with every deep thrust, whipping your insides into a frenzy of sensations.

"Shit, baby..."

"Yeah, this how I fuck good pussy, I stroke it just like this. Fuuuck," his taunts dissolve in a moan as pleasure licks his spine. With another touch of his mouth to yours, he shoves your thighs against your chest and keeps feeding you the dick, making a hiss escape from the back of your throat. He pulls all the way out to the tip of his dick before sinking back inside, repeating this until your pussy is making squelching sounds surrendering to his strokes. Your arms wind around his shoulders, luring him down to keep him close to you. You stare into his dilated pupils. His salt-and-pepper beard gleams with traces of your first two nuts and the visual is erotic as hell. It's fascinating to watch the storm in his eyes, his pouty lips parted with pleasure, his muscles flexing as the strength of his thrusts intensifies.

"Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck." The smacks of his pelvis grow harder, punching groans out of you. Baby boy is knocking the Sonic rings out of your pussy now, and your eyes roll in the back of your head as he holds your thick thighs down while he pounds into your heat, leaving you gasping like a fish out of water. Jey paws at your breast, flicking your nipple with his fingers, and you can feel your brain short-circuiting as several million nerve endings ignite within you.

"Mmm, am I handlin' it now huh? Am I handlin' it?" he throws your words back at you.

"Yes, Daddy," you moan, your fingers sinking into his back.

"You know this pussy mine, right?" he says, his eyes boring into yours.

"Uh huh," you choke out, gasping as he grinds into you for a few seconds, then resumes pumping into you again. The switch-up is crazy.

"That's my girl. My pretty girl with my pretty pussy." Your mouths clash noisily, his hands massaging and caressing all over your voluptuous body. It's a known fact that Jey loves women of all types. But there's something about a thick, sexy, pillow-soft woman with soft and delicate features that drives him wild. They are his favorite, and he knew the moment he first saw you that he would not rest until he had you. Now that he has, he concludes that Lawrence is never getting you back.

He leans back up and releases your breast to wrap his hand around your throat, another dark chuckle slipping from his lips as your pussy instantly moistens around him. "Ahh, you like that? Like to be choked like a bad girl? Like a naughty lil' slut?"

It's the nasty talk for you. Nothing sounds as sexy as shit-talking done right, and boy, he's doing it so right. He means every word he's saying, and even sexier, he's backing it up with spectacular fucking that you already know you'll never get enough of. Being someone who wrestles for a living, he knows how to make his touch firm and gentle in all the right moments. It's a deadly skill that he's using on you expertly, and you know from this night forward, you're ruined. You just know it.

Letting out a low growl, Jey fucks you faster, harder, watching your face contort with pleasure. He has you making so much noise with both your mouth and your pussy. He barely hears your mewling warning that you're about to come again, deciding to up the ante by hitching your legs over his elbows and fucking you into the couch. The back of your head mashes almost uncomfortably against the bottom of the headrest, but you take no notice because you're feeling too good. Your moans morph into screams which are quickly cut off as his hand tightens around your throat, making you look into his eyes and making you take it. Your nut comes crashing down so hard you're seeing stars. You're a moaning, shivering mess, your hands pressing his abs in a futile attempt to stop your pussy from gushing all over his groin and messing up his brand new sectional. But he doesn't seem to care.

"Nah, baby, take this dick like you said you can," he growls with gritted teeth. He grips you tight, yanking you up closer to his groin and thrusting faster into you. "Unnh, look at that. Look at that wet ass pussy comin'. This dick real good, huh babe?"

What the fuck have you gotten yourself into? You're dealing with a literal demon. You want to throw in the towel, wave the white flag. The orgasms you've already experienced have you feeling paralyzed, unable to move even as your ass rests in a large wet spot on the couch.

"Jey, please, baby, wait," Your pitiful moans fall on deaf ears as he pulls out and flips you over before you can finish your sentence. When he cups your pussy from behind, you arch your ass and automatically spread your thighs, grinding against his fingers. You feel like such a slut. One minute you're begging him to stop, the next you're riding his damn hand. Deep down inside you love it, love the myriad of sensations and emotions you haven't felt since before you met this Samoan specimen.

The fun and games continue as his fingers are replaced by his plum-shaped dickhead pushing back into your wet pussy. Both of you groan hungrily as the friction is nonexistent now thanks to your sopping slickness. Another moan falls from your lips as he smacks your ass while grinding into you, making himself fit all the way in and basking in your little noises as you accommodate him. He eases you flat onto your belly, nudging your thighs wider apart, hunching over you as he works his magic all over again, stroking in that pussy until your eyes are in the back of your head. "Fuck, I'm deeper in that shit baby, holy fuck," he gasps, one hand pressing into your back to hold you down, the other braced beside your head as he rails you hard and deep.

The fullness you feel in your pussy and stomach, the jiggles of your ass from his thighs bumping into it, your creamy cum coating his dick and balls which he feeds back to you...you feel them all at once. There's only one person's sex you want from this day forth, and it's Jey's. You want his big ass dick every damn day. It is a high that you never want to come off of. You're obsessed with the way it makes your body feel, the way it makes your prim and proper self shout and moan and undulate with no inhibitions.

Lawrence who?

"Oooh," you whine over and over into the pillow pressing your face, your vision starting to blur, "oooh, oooh, you feel gooood Daddy..."

Jey moans in your ear, snaking a hand back around your throat and giving it a light squeeze, "How good? I bet you gon' come again," he taunts.

The pressure of his fingers on each side of your neck ensures that every breath you take is shallower than the last as he drives in and out of your pussy, in and out, his long, thick shaft finding your g-spot each time he slides home. It doesn't take long for you to explode, shaking uncontrollably beneath his heavy warmth. His dirty talk has done you in again. His head drops down to suckle your neck, humming his appreciation as his hips wind into you with added vigor.

"Daddy..." your voice is barely above a whisper, and even then, your breath is stolen from you when he squeezes your ass cheeks and then slaps each one hard, repeating the action mid-thrusts. He's ruthless, making your pussy sing filthy, shameless, raunchy noises that cause that familiar burn to heat you up for yet another delicious climax.

"Let Daddy pound out his pussy, baby, let Daddy pound that shit," Jey says, raising himself up, yanking your ass up with him as he kneels behind you, not missing a single stride. Your thick hips are in his grasp, his thumbs pressed in the small of your back to keep your arch steady. He's fucking you so damn good. The amount of pleasure he's gifted your sex-starved body in multiple positions has left you speechless. This is a dicking down for the ages, one you never thought you would experience in your lifetime.

A shiver runs up your back as his fingers slip down to rub your clit, exacerbating all the sensations swimming within your body. Your mouth falls wide open but you have been robbed of all capacity to speak, reduced to loud incoherent groans as his hips snap relentlessly against your ass.

"Look at me, baby girl," Jey commands gruffly when you stuff your face into the pillow to muffle your screams, "Look at me. Let me see that beautiful face as you come."

You do as he says, acutely aware of how fucked out you must look right now. As you twist your upper body towards him, you drink in his own expression, his bottom lip tucked between his teeth, his brows furrowed, his body actually trembling a little as he buries his cock in you. You realize he's losing control too, his impending climax pulling him under. He looks so sexy, it feels so good that it overwhelms you and triggers your orgasm, ecstasy ripping through you with brute force.

"Oh my god, Jey," you lick your dry lips, your strength depleted from the barrage of pleasure. You feel, as well as hear his own husky moan through his mouth pressed to yours as as your pussy tenses around his dick swelling inside you.

"Unhhh, I'm comin', I'm comin' for you, baby," he rasps; this big strong man so weak and helpless for you that you're aroused anew. He grinds desperately against you, stuttered breaths leaving both your throats as your world spirals. You let out a stunned yelp when he slams into you once and then freezes, his cock throbbing as he empties inside you. The guttural moan he lets out as he comes hard is the sexiest thing you've ever heard. It's fascinating to see him fall apart like this, enraptured in total pleasure as he gives himself to you. You miss him the second he pulls out of you. He slumps down next to you, exhaling hard and heavy, and you crawl into his waiting arms for a cuddle. It's then you realize the room is darker than usual; the end credits of that X-rated film are rolling.

"You know you ain't goin' home this weekend, right?" Jey informs you, rubbing your backside with a lick of his lips and hooded hungry eyes. It's an order, not a request, because he's not letting you go anywhere, not after the indescribable high he's just experienced.

"I'm not sure I can even think right now. I'm so damn weak," you half-sigh, half-giggle, leaning into him as he trails soft kisses along your shoulder.

"Whatchu need? Water? Energy drink?" he offers.

"Water, please," you answer meekly, and he is up from the couch and in the kitchen in a flash. Watching him walk away with that back tattoo and that firm, fine ass sends a thrill of lust to your pussy which still quivers between your thighs. You're almost afraid to touch it, you know it's definitely beat up, all sloppy and puffy from his licking and rubbing and fucking.

He returns with two bottles of water and hands one to you. You thank him and twist open the cap to gulp it down, appreciating the cool liquid gliding down your parched throat. Jey reclines beside you and chugs his bottle in one go. You can't help but ogle his caramel steel rod, the condom gone, yet still hard and streaked with your collective cum. You blush when he catches your wandering eye, chuckling to himself as he wraps his arms around your waist and eases you onto his lap. He strokes your hair, presses his lips to your forehead, and then kisses you deeply. You cup his bearded chin, enjoying his little hums mingling with yours as your tongues tangle together. When you pull back, you swoon at the dreamy look in his gorgeous eyes with a dreamy, sated smile of your own.

"You made me come in every position. That's never happened before," you tell him.

His lip curls proudly at your statement. "Well, I got a couple more positions to test out. We just gettin' started."

Your words lodge in your throat at the seriousness in his voice. "Really?" you squeak out.

"Yep. We goin' to the bedroom soon. We doin' this all night, bae," he says.

"Damn. You're threatening me with a good time, but can a bitch breathe first?" you jokingly gripe, but the knowing gleam in his eye tells you he's not joking. At all. Your pussy flutters despite the beating it's already taken.

"Of course." His response is salaciously cryptic, letting the words hang in the air as he leans in for another gentle kiss. "So...were you disappointed?"

"With this? Hell no! Not at all. It was amazing."

Again, that damn smirk. "I agree. And there's a lot more where that came from." He points at the bottle in your hand. "Drink up, baby girl. You gon' need all the energy you can get."

THE END.

---------------------

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[wisteria-lodge]

Have you sorted the Hogwarts Legacy companions at all?? I checked your master list and couldn’t find anything but I’m not sure if I’m just being blind 💀😂

So here's the thing.

(And your ask is super nice and in absolute good-faith, it's just also a good way of getting into this stuff.)

Buffy the Vampire Slayer is not Joss Whedon. House of Cards is not Kevin Spacey. But Harry Potter kinda is JK Rowling. She has an astounding and honestly pretty unique amount of both creative control and ownership over that property. The only other person I can think of who's even in the same category is George Lucas... before he sold it to Disney, obviously.

And JKR has written about how she interprets the royalty checks she gets as kind of tacit approval from the world, which makes sense because she's been also very public about how she spends those royalty checks to support anti-trans campaigners and legislation.

But. But. I get wanting to engage with the property. I mean, obviously. I'm going to tag this 'sortinghatchats.' The parent system is clearly HP, and the point of changing the terminology was never disguising that, it was more supposed to communicate that I am not engaging with the work or its creator uncritically. I think it's worked pretty well. I've gotten maybe one piece of anon hate calling me a terf? That's not bad.

I'm a teacher, and the place I work attracts a *lot* of LGBT students. Trans and non-binary especially. And they're interested in Harry Potter. They read a lot of Harry Potter fanfiction. They want to talk to me about Harry Potter, and about JK Rowling. I don't see this property fading away any time soon.

And like. I was a fan. I waited until midnight in a bookstore to get books 4, 5, 6 and 7. My Sibyl Trelawney came in second at the book 7 costume contest. Which was fine because the girl who won did the most perfect Hermione you've ever seen, and spent the whole time handing out SPEW badges and knitting house elf clothing.

Recently, I'm finding myself wanting to unpack this property as an adult. Maybe understand some of the biases I didn't pick up as a kid, maybe do right by some of my favorite characters. Because there's good stuff in there. How much was on accident versus on purpose, how much is the fandom interpreting the text in a specific way, how much is the films smoothing over issues... and creating different issues... I would like to work all that out.

And actually, when I started writing some Harry Potter fanfiction over the holidays, it came pouring out, and it felt *good.* Clearly I've got a lot of *stuff* that I want to examine and *put somewhere,* and for me, writing (ships that JKR doesn't like) was a fun and ethical way to do that. Maybe I'll even post it with a nice disclaimer.

So that's me. Fanfiction, fan side-projects, fan merch. I guess the argument against that would be "free advertising," but like - HP has so much just - actual advertising - and I'd like it if people who still wanted to engage with the property had somewhere else to go. So no Hogwarts Legacy for me, no Fantastic Beasts films, or HBO miniseries, or even Cormoran Strike books. (and people don't talk about this enough - but a big aspect of that series is essentially JKR writing a non-magic AU where she ships herself with Mad-Eye Moody. I have no idea what to do with this information, but now you have it too.)

I could see myself writing more about JKR or Harry Potter, once I've turned it over more in my mind and feel like I have something useful and new to say. But as it is, this is a snapshot of where I am.

[aseriesofunfortunatejan]

I can't lie I'm kinda feeling like a mix of "really never doing anything for that international shipping", "a bunch of meh recent collections" and especially "retiring two of my favourite ever nailpolishes" has kinda killed my hype for Holo Taco.

I've been a fan since Cristine started the brand and, though it makes sense because they're a company, there's something about removing bright, special colours in favour of neutrals that doesn't work with their original story. I honestly have a theory that due to the popularity of Holo Taco in the US, where it's not an expensive brand thanks to the lowcost shipping, the bulk of the customers will buy a lot of "basics" from HT, while long-time fans from Europe or other countries can only justify to buy sometimes and they'll focus on the really special looking products that they can't buy from a company with less expensive shipping.

Lately, I've been grimacing about their marketing campaigns. They're in that awkward middle where a lot of communication comes from Cristine (people who watch her streams are informed first over people who follow the brand exclusively) all the while straying from the original "intense to the point of being weird holo" branding she was popular for. Site info and contests are announced by TikTok style videos of 35 years old Cristine doing an awkward little dance and pointing at the screen. That makes me grimace and scroll past. I don't relate because I'm an adult who's not on TikTok (as are a lot of well adjusted adults who are likely to have watched Cristine on YouTube back then) and kids probably don't relate either because she's obviously in her 30s.

(Although I'm surprised to find out she's only 35. She's branded herself as an old lady for years... 35 is really not that old for being an online creator these days.)

Anyway, I know my tumblr followers don't really care........ But I'm bummed to have fallen out of love in so many ways with Cristine and her brand, which initially sold us the dream of specialised nailpolish that people who had tastes just like Cristine shared on her YouTube channel - which I had - would enjoy. Now we get to see Frost Light removed in favour of a newer, greyer blue, greens removed because they don't sell as much (obviously, they're greens - Holo Taco focuses on overall sales over having a diversified catalogue apparently) (not to mention that, as much as I'm personally happy about it because it's actually my very favourite nailpolish, Cristine led an entire campaign to "save" Zyler the Cat, which is an unfair bias compared to nailpolishes that were just plain retired) and greige collections that try to advertise themselves like we're all TikTok teens.

[mrs-toohot]

So MrsTooHot - who are your faveourites so far? I might be head over heels for Alex already, but I’m really loving Theo as well. Sarah is drop dead gorgeous & definitely has a sweet core to uncover, & Marisa is already sweet & beautiful on the outside (with no doubt more underneath too)

Gosh, it’s so wonderful to have multiple viable options amongst the genders. Not just “here are all the men for your female m.c”. But multiple ladies, Alex my non binary boo 💕, and we the m.c can be male or non binary too. I am LOVING all this representation 🏳️‍🌈

I’ve seen a lot of complaints that too many people are into m.c, and yes it’s a bit ridiculous, but better than the alternative (cue s5 LITG war flashbacks). I am seeing some interest amongst other contestants (Sarah and Dakota definitely 👀, maybe Liam & Marisa, possibly Alex and Henri?). So I’m predicting/hoping we’ll soon see the characters we’ve not shown significant interest in pairing off soon (including with the upcoming bombshells)

I think the 27 possible endings mean we can also end up with two of the bombshells (probably one male, one female), and that there will be three ending variations per contestant. What do you think?

-Alex anon (again, jeeze I’m just loving this game, hope I’m not spamming you too much 😆)

Oh me oh my, I am having serious FOMO with this game.

My first playthrough, I was SO drawn to Alex. They're so freaking cute, I love their whole vibe, so chill and sweet urghhh. But I quickly fell into the dicksand with Theo (hehehe) and have been trying to avoid him ever since.

Theo is a seriously bad influence on me.

Also trying to avoid Sarah, I've been toeing the line with her way way too much. I've restarted a few times, flirting with Liam as well, but I'm not sold on him yet - a few people are saying he's got a really sweet route so I'll have to see how they're liking it further down the track.

Right now I'm on a Henri route, oh my good lord he is just sweeter than sugar, but damn he's got a very sexy side that I didn't expect EEEEE, just because he's a little dumb and very sweet doesn't mean the man doesn't know what he's doing in bed muahhahaha.

For the girls, God, I want Sarah and Marisa so bad. I'm not super feeling Dakota, idk, she just doesn't interest me that much. Who knows though, I might be wrong and she'll turn out to be really cute, I know she's already got a couple of superfans.

I can't wait to see how all the endings go!!!!!!!! EEEEEEE

And no you're not spamming!!! But you should join the discord in my bio, everyone's fanning and stanning over the characters in there it's so great!!

[beefmastersblog]

SWAMPCON :D

YAYYY SwampCon was this weekend. This was my first year attending, and I didn’t even know UF put on their own convention, so I thought the idea of that alone was very cool. I know that technically this post isn’t supposed to be due until April, but I wanted to write down all of my thoughts in advance, before I forget everything, since I finished up only a few hours ago.

I’ve been to a few larger conventions in South Florida, and I notice that each year there are usually large amounts of merchandise for whatever anime is popular at the time. This year, I noticed a lot of stuff for Chainsaw man which I thought was really cool. But I remember the last time I went a few years ago, there was a lot of sports anime stuff. It is interesting to watch how specifically the artist areas change with new trends in what anime are popular at the time with the fans.

I also notice that Dungeons and Dragons seems to be a pretty recurring theme at a lot of these types of conventions. I almost feel like it has become more popular lately though, I know there was an event for it at the convention, and there were many vendors selling DnD specific things. I wonder if that is partially due to it being repopularized with the Netflix show, Stranger Things.

It was also really fun to see people dressed up in cosplays and the ways in which the otaku engage in the repossession of fiction. I dressed up in an outfit inspired by one of my favorite anime characters, Rin Matsuoka from Free, and I was happy that someone complemented my free jacket :) and knew what the anime was.

But I noticed that a lot of people went ALL OUT. I got to watch the cosplay contest and some of the cosplayers were so impressive! One girl had moving wings which I thought was so amazing. I know that it takes so much time and effort to cosplay, and I think that really emphasizes the passion that many otaku have for the specific anime that they are part of the fandom of.

Tying into that idea of repossession of fiction, I really loved the vendor halls. I thought it was cool that there were a variety of things, such as the people that made little soap boxes modeled after your DnD characters. I really enjoyed sniffing all of the soaps. This is me sniffing the soaps:

I also liked seeing all the super cute keychains, stickers, and buttons that were being sold. Unfortunately, I did not buy anything, but I did find a really cute Ebisu sticker from Dorohedoro that I was super tempted to buy, but I did not have any place to stick it so I did not buy it. But I was very excited when I saw the sticker in the first place, since so many people don't even know what that anime is. This is me looking at the booth that had the sticker I liked:

I also was a volunteer, so while I was doing my shift and standing outside the doors, I noticed a lot of interactions between the otakus there. It was interesting to see the immediate bond that developed between people who were cosplaying something from the same show, and the excitement of taking pictures together. I thought that was really cute. I think that is something that is pretty unique to otaku, especially when it comes to that idea of fandom. I’m not exactly sure whether it is because that is the closest thing to actually meeting that character or simply because it is exciting to find someone with the same passion for a series that you have, but it was really nice to see the energy filled interactions between people of the same fandom. Since I was a volunteer, I was also able to see firsthand how much work goes into putting on this event. I think it is really amazing that people are willing to work so hard and take so much time out of their schedules for SwampCon to be successful and so that other people can come and have a good time. It hadn’t ever occurred to me before that planning conventions like these take so much work, and I think that is also a testament to the otaku’s passion for anime and pop culture, and the ways in which they want to help create a safe place for people to come together and enjoy those things.

But, of course, not everyone was necessarily enjoying SwampCon being there. I know that the stereotype against otaku was a theme discussed in anime such as Genshiken, and I did see examples of that here. For example, a lot of people at UF didn’t know the convention was going on, and there were many students that simply walked into the Reitz to pick up some food. I know a few people who saw the cosplayers and reacted negatively, believing that cosplaying characters is creepy and weird, and that the only time it is alright to dress up as an adult. I had a few friends that did make fun of them for dressing up, and also thought it was weird that I was even going in the first place. I thought it was very interesting, since, as someone who has been heavily involved in anime for the past 8 years, I had never really thought of cosplay as something strange at all. I was also under the impression that the idea of anime conventions and just enjoying anime in general was something that was becoming more popular. I remember, back in middle school, I got bullied for enjoying anime, even though by no means would I say I was creepy about it (I had a very basic, brown backpack with these teeny tiny love live characters embroidered on it and like one keychain). But still, that was something that I got picked on for. But as Attack on Titan came out with new seasons and became more popular among people that hadn’t seen anime before, I thought that this negative stigma had significantly decreased. I also would have thought that being adults and in college, people wouldn’t be so judgy about it, since a lot of anime are aimed at adult audiences. But I guess that goes to show that otaku culture very much still is something that gets stigmatized.

But despite the haters, I had a good time. I wish I took more pictures, but on Saturday I looked like I crawled out of the sewer so I was not wanting to take any photos of myself to post on here. I also wish I could have possessed one of those cute goose plushies, but I already have so many that maybe it is for the best. Overall, SwampCon was really cool. I can't wait to see it get bigger and better next year, and I'm glad I got to go. I think this also sparked my interest in going to conventions again. This summer I'm going to be in 3 different states, so maybe I'll be able to find some cool conventions around the country to explore.

[parivvv]

Although I’ve never taken part in any convention, I have wanted to go with my brother as he is really into video games. Because I have never been to any conventions, I’ll be talking about the True Otaku documentary, which discusses otaku culture in America. 

At the Convention discussed in the documentary, there were many different types of people attending. There were anime fans, manga fans, cosplayers, fashionistas, video gamers, and many more. I really like how different aspects of Japanese culture have been mixed and integrated in one convention. It’s really interesting to see how Japan’s soft power has truly affected other countries in the world. When people participating in the convention were asked whether or not they were otakus, most said yes, even if their definition of otaku was different. This idea is really interesting to me as people who didn’t know the meaning of otaku took it to mean a fan of some part of japanese culture. 

Another interesting part of the documentary were the cosplayers. I knew that cosplaying entailed putting on a costume of a certain character, but I didn’t know all the niches included with it. I had no idea that some cosplayers make part of their costumes. I always thought that every cosplayer bought their costumes. It is really amazing to see all the effort cosplayers put into their costumes, even adding their own personal touches to them. I didn’t even think of the fact that some cosplayers have to dye their wigs, make accessories, and make intricately designed costumes. 

I also found it very interesting how there are costume contests in some conventions. Having a costume contest seems super fun considering people get to dress as some of their favorite characters while also competing on their costume design skills. I really like how the competition shown in the documentary was based on people’s costuming experience. I feel as if it becomes more enticing to participate if you are a beginner and are competing against other beginners. Competitions might also improve people’s confidence in their costuming skills, encouraging them to continue their hobby.

Another interesting aspect of Otakon was the abundance of Lolita style clothing. I knew that conventions often sold merchandise of franchises, but I never imagined that they would sell clothing pieces that are more often found and worn by subcultures in Japan. I also found it interesting to see really how many people participated in Japanese subcultures. In the documentary, two people being interviewed about their interest in lolita clothing discussed how they go to conventions, and smaller meetups with people who are also interested in lolita fashion. Many of the people being interviewed have also said they often go to smaller gatherings of people with similar interests as them. 

With all of the merchandise at conventions, it is inevitable that people will partake in consumerism. One person being interviewed even said that they know they’ll be spending a lot every time they go to a convention. Many people already spend so much on the convention ticket, or even their costume, but there might be a certain meaning attached to the items sold at a convention. My friends who have gone to conventions have also told me that they’ve done the same. They’d go to a convention and spend hundreds of dollars on plushies, games, clothing, and more. I don’t think I’d ever spend a lot of money on merchandise, but at the same time, if I saw an item of one of my favorite shows or games, I’d probably buy it. 

Lastly, one of the most important things I saw in the documentary was the social impact of conventions. An important point was brought up during the documentary that otakus, specifically cosplayers might get dirty looks or be treated differently because of their enjoyment in Japanese culture, but in conventions they will not be faced with the similar discrimination. It reminds me of Wolf Children, and how there were only certain safe spaces where Ame and Yuki could truly discover and embrace themselves. Another important idea was that conventions bring people together. Families get closer, and people are able to meet new friends and even potential partners.

I’ve never been to a convention, but I think it would be super interesting to go!

[anyways-wonderwall]

Album of the Week #78

Look At Me Now

(2014)

by SPEED

Overall Rating: 6/10

TL;DR: A great time capsule, which means it should be left in the past. 

(bruh this cover is awful, 1/10)

Overall Thoughts

I recently read The Selection for the first time so I can feel a sense of closure and donate those books I bought when I was in 6th grade, and the experience really brought me back to what the culture was for young people back in 2012. A book that is a clear rip off of The Hunger Games (the premise is a bachelor-esque contest for the crown with a revolution in the background), riddled with plot holes and “I’m not like other girls” energy was fine, not ripped apart on twitter the world over. Life was simple, life was good, and SPEED was coming out with their forgettable kpop music. 

This is album that was never meant to leave its time period, and didn’t (something I wish would have applied to The Selection). The songs fit perfectly into the trends of 2013/4, barely sold at the time, made a little ripple, then the members of the group moved on to other things. Only one (maybe two) of their songs lived past that year, and if you ask most modern kpop fans I don’t think they’ve ever heard of them. Funnily enough the songs that did survive didn’t do so on musical merit, it was because the choreography for them was so insane that they became viral. The most famous one (“Don’t Tease Me” which is on this EP and we’ll talk about later), doesn’t even have a music video, because the dance video took off so much. It’s interesting looking back at such a flash (well flicker) in the pan the we’ve all left behind. 

While forgettable this album is decent: the title track has a great catchy melody but that’s all it has going for it (and it’s very aware of that), the single “Zombie Party” is at least trying to be unique but is left scattered, “왜 난 꼭” is an upbeat ballad with rapping that sounds like its trying to be inspirational, “Focus” is the standard rap song on a kpop album that just says fuck as much as they can and not in any understandable context, and “Hey Ma Lady” is a really fun end to the album although its quick tempo and upright bass sounds like it might be killing them. I think this works great as a time capsule of Kpop from this time though, the songs are full and pretty complex, flushed out with high and mighty synths and at least one odd ball instrument part. 

I left out “Don’t Tease Me” in that paragraph because as the only great song in the album it deserves its own. The song welcomes you to the circus with sound bites of lions and elephants and synthy grandiose horns then speeds through to an in-your-face catchy chorus. High-pitched synths remind you of those elephants from the beginning, all while an unnerving baseline and violin keeps you on your toes and reminds you of the awesome danger involved. The song also drips with the attitude you’d expect from a ringleader, barking at you from his post. Mix that with a dance video that includes multiple flips and people thrown in the air and you have a song that I still think about and look for on spotify. For the past 8 years I’ve found myself going back to that music video, smiling at the ridiculousness of the circus song, the boys fluorescent hair, the video filmed in a high school gym, and the memories of middle school that come from this period. 

Next week's review: S:INEMA (2022) by SAAY

[writingquestionsanswered]

Thoughts on Experience and Being an Author

I don't want to spend too much mental energy on this today, but there are some things in Anon's diatribe that I think are worth looking at more closely.

"I'm not sure how qualified you are to give out advice on these things when you're only a self-published writer of like one book."

Imagine walking into a painter's studio, seeing easel after easel of painted canvases, seeing them leaning against the walls, seeing years worth of paint covering a floor tarp, and years worth of dried paint layering old paint pallets, and then telling them they don't know anything about painting because they've only ever sold one piece of their art.

Experience and knowledge aren't gained through publication or sale of your work, but through the years of effort put into learning your craft. I've been writing fiction since I was in grade school, but I've been writing it seriously (as in with the intention of entertaining others) since I was in high-school, so more than 30 years. And in that time I've written fan-fiction for numerous shows, countless original short stories, stories for writing classes and workshops, stories for contests and collections, lots of bad poetry (mostly when I was younger), and several as-of-yet unpublished novels. I've collaborated with other writers. My work has been read and received feedback from others (alpha readers, beta readers, critique partners, writing groups, sensitivity readers, other writers, editors, and readers.) I've alpha read, beta read, and critiqued others' work. I have and still have longtime critique partners. Many years after it was published, people still tell me how much they enjoyed my book.

"How are people supposed to take advice from you about their writing seriously if your own writing barely gets any attention or praise?"

If you're self-published, you know that book marketing is hard. After an initial push when my book launched, I opted not to worry too much about it. Still, my book has been read and enjoyed by dozens and dozens of people, which is good enough for me. But, like I said, my book isn't the only thing I've written. My writing has received lots of praise from lots of different people, some of them professionals. The writing I've chosen to share has received more attention than I ever dreamed possible, and I'm pretty happy with that.

"You're giving tips about an industry you're not even apart of."

Being part of the publishing industry is about more than churning out books. Yes, I only have one published book, but I'm working on publishing another one. I'm a member of a globally recognized organization for independent writers, I stay relatively up-to-date on industry news--both in terms of self-publishing and traditional publishing, I am active in promoting books written by fellow indie authors, I'm active in reading and reviewing books written by other authors, I help writer friends with publication--including helping them write query letters, blurbs, and giving them pep talks when they feel frustrated or ready to give up. I'm an active member in several writing communities. I've run a writing advice blog for almost 10 years that has 10k followers, including followers who have gone on to both self-publish and traditionally publish.

"There's a difference between being a writer and actually being an author."

You're right! Being a writer means that you write. Being an author means that you're published. I have one published book, a published zine story, and a few published articles. That's what makes me an author. :)

[atruththatyoudeny]

Happy 28th! A new month - so new fics for you to find and enjoy! I can’t say it enough: all the authors in this fandom are truly amazing! Thank you so much for continuously sharing your hard work with us ♥ Here are the 14 fics I read and enjoyed this month:

A Hungry Heart | jacaranda_bloom | Great British Bake Off AU - famous/not famous - cliches - pining - angst - smut - 27k Harry Styles, florist and Great British Bake Off contestant, loves many things. He loves his flower shop, he loves baking, and there’s also that little crush he has on pop star Louis Tomlinson. But when Louis arrives on set as the surprise guest judge, Harry’s worlds collide. Throw in a cup of cuteness, a teaspoon of teasing, and a pinch of pining, and there’s all the ingredients for an epic love story, or absolute chaos. Or the one where the Bake Off tent has never been so hot, and it’s got nothing to do with what’s in the ovens.

Teenage Rebellion Never Worked Out So Well | panda_bear21 | arranged marriage - friends to lovers - 55k “I’m an adult!” He glanced down at Harry, who seemed anything but at the moment, where he was definitely on the brink of a temper tantrum. “We’re both adults!” Jay glanced to Anne again, before breathing out a heavy sigh. “Yes, but you’re both adults that do not have jobs and who live off of our money… Which means, you have to do what we say… or you’ll have to find a new place to live.” “You wouldn’t do that.” Louis dared, hoping his glare was enough to guilt trip his mother into calling the whole thing off. Or to tell them that it had all just been a huge joke and they weren’t actually being forced into marrying a complete stranger. “Oh, but we would.” Or the super cliché arranged marriage fic where things escalate way too quickly.

Heartbreak Hotel | noellehenry | time travel - 1950s - historical - pining - 29k British popstar Harry Styles is thrown back in time after an unfortunate accident on stage. He wakes up in a small town in the US in the 1950's, where life is slightly different from 2015. With help from Niall and Liam he tries to adjust to his new life; without mobile phones and a world wide web to keep up with the world and where showing interest in nice cute boys with bright blue eyes is a no-no. Time travel and 1950's AU where Liam is an English teacher, Niall owns the Best Song Ever record shop, James runs Corden's Diner, Elvis fan Louis is the cute boy with the blue eyes and Harry..... just tries to survive really.

Playdate | Larry_you_know | getting together - misunderstandings - kid fic - fluff - 7k When Harry’s sister asked him to pick up her son at a kids' birthday party he sure didn’t expect to be stunned by the blue-eyed brother of the birthday twins. Using his nephew to see Louis again, he falls hard and fast. But how does one turn a playdate into a real date?

tread lightly on my ground | fairytalelights | a/b/o - mpreg - touch-starved - miscommunication - friends to lovers - touch deprivation - smut - 21k No, that's the tragic part of this, the part that makes Harry feel like the universe is playing a cruel joke on him. The father of his baby is exactly right, exactly who he always imagined himself having kids with. He just imagined them married, bonded. Happy. He didn't imagine them barely talking, tip-toeing around each other because neither of them is brave enough to talk about what happened between them. He didn't imagine the father of his child not loving him back. or, the one where Harry is having Louis' baby, but Louis doesn't know it's his.

Not Ready for This | berzerkshires | kid fic - single parents - smut - 18k Prompt for HLSummerFest2021: Louis and Harry are both single fathers and their children decide to go out on a date. The dads insist on meeting one another before they agree to let their child go out on this date.

Secret's Safe With Me | alltheselights | boss/employee relationship - secret relationship - toxic relationship (not h/l) - slow burn - smut - 59k But here’s the thing about secrets that people tend to forget—they’re deeply personal things. Tiny pieces of information about someone that they keep locked inside and only let out at certain moments, or to certain people, or not at all. Secrets have value, you see, even if only to the person holding them inside. If those secrets were to be told, if those tiny jagged pieces of someone, the parts they hold most dear, the parts they hide out of shame or fear or regret—if those pieces were exposed to someone, it would have the potential to change everything. When bad turbulence and three glasses of wine have Louis spilling all of his secrets to the man sitting next to him on the plane, it's embarrassing, sure, but it's also easy enough to shrug off and block out of his memory forever. Or at least, it was until Louis went into work on Monday morning and realized that the man from the plane is the new CEO of his company.

Marks On My Baby | thinlines | a/b/o - college/university - friends to lovers - hurt/comfort - angst - fluff - smut - 32k “What’s that?” Harry hadn’t meant for his voice to sound so sharp and even he winced at his own outburst. It was more of a hiss than an actual question, but for now, he was too surprised to care. “What’s what?” The omega asked, eyebrows raised and lips pinched. Harry knew he was probably mad at him for interrupting his rant, but the alpha was too on edge to bother pleasing the boy. “On your neck… Your bondmark spot…” His voice had grown low and deep, almost a growl. Who knew a single love bite on his omega friend's neck would trigger Harry this much? Certainly not the alpha himself.

Rogue | Laventriloque | a/b/o - werewolves - minor character death - hurt/comfort - past abuse - past rape/non-con - soulmates - smut - 95k “No, Liam! How many times do I have to… before you finally… NO WAY … a rogue in our pack?… cannot trust him … don’t care to know him … have enough members to worry about.” He hears more indistinct shouts before he hears pretty clearly: “His own pack didn’t want him!” Sitting here, his precious bag between his feet and everyone in the room looking at him, some with pity, some with disdain, some with curiosity, Louis feels like someone squeezed his heart in their hands and isn’t letting it go. He wills his head to stay up high and his posture to stay confident. He will not flee the room. He will not let that stupid lump in his throat get the better of him. He will stay here until Liam returns. He will take the rejection in stride and move on. Like he’s been doing all his life." -- Louis is a rogue Omega who's suffered through rejection and abuse for the biggest part of his life. He stumbles onto the Styles pack, quite possibly the kindest one he's ever met.

indian summer | docklands | strangers to lovers - hurt/comfort - banter - smut - 30k Harry runs a smoothie shop, which also happens to be an ever-moving caravan. He spends one week in each location and drives straight to the next, always eager for adventure. It isn't until his van breaks down and he needs to call for a mechanic that he starts to ponder his life choices. Louis, the said mechanic, is an anchor in Harry's wild sea, but his hard metal might be too much for Harry's unpredictable antics.

A Silver Lining In A Storm (You Were Lightning, I Was Born) | FallingLikeThis | arranged marriage - royalty - a/b/o - mpreg - minor character death - murder - non-graphic violence - angst - hurt/comfort - 7k Omega Prince Harry had always known that he was going to have an arranged marriage. But after the death of his first fiancé, a man who turned out far worse than Harry thought possible, his subsequent marriage to the man's brother leaves Harry finding it difficult to trust that everything will work out. Especially considering the only responsibility he’s aware of is to give his husband, the future king, an heir.

A Twist of Fate | myfearlesslou | a/b/o - strangers to lovers - soulmates - angst - 35k Since the moment Harry presented as an omega, all he's ever wanted was to have a baby. Fate had another idea in mind for him. Giving up on trying to conceive, he decides to adopt a new born baby boy. After months of loving and caring for the boy, a strange man comes into his life, taking him by surprise. Not wanting to lose the child he's loved from the moment he laid eyes on him, Harry does whatever he can to keep the boy safe and in his arms. Even if that means following the handsome stranger to a part of the woods he's never seen before.

Trust Me Tonight | 28sunflowers | historical - royalty - regency - arranged marriage - first time - mpreg - pwp - 10k After Harry’s eighteenth birthday, his father calls him into a meeting to say that he is to be married to Prince Louis of France in just over a week. Harry is excited, of course. The arrangement is better than any he could’ve hoped for, with such a young, handsome and kind husband. There is just one issue: Harry doesn’t know what happens on his nuptials, or how to get pregnant to give Louis the heir that he needs.

i got a heart (but i don't got a soul) | tempolarriefics | mythical beings Á creatures - enemies to lovers - childhood friends - famous/not famous - soulmates - angel/demon relationship - demon/human relationship - 19k “We’re soulmates.” Louis’ eyes flick from the tattoo back to Harry’s face, where his eyes are shining with excitement. Louis wonders if he is supposed to feel excited, too. He’s supposed to feel something, surely, besides his usual bitterness for Harry. He thinks back to how Lottie had described meeting Sam, how she had known in her heart that he was meant for her even before he said his phrase. He can’t help but wonder if he would be feeling differently if he hadn’t gone and sold his soul. Or, the one where louis sells his soul before meeting his soulmate, harry is a popstar with a heart of gold, niall is inadvertently responsible for harry's boners, liam is a meddling angel, and zayn is a demon who made a mistake

[lol-jackles]

Basically Misha is also trying to retcon Dean's character: he claims that writers and producers and everyone on SPN were in denial about Cass's feelings for Dean, including Dean and therefore Jensen (www*youtube*com/watch?v=mJk-K). But in this way, M. puts J. in an uncomfortable position: how can J. ever contest this now, without making M. seem a total opportunist and without attracting the usual accusations of homophobia? It seems to me a really unfair behavior on the part of M. towards J.

Looks like the video got privatized, but no worries there's others on youtube. Misha looked uncomfortable at first before collecting himself (it's not Creation Con after all). His answers were all over the place, throwing everything out there to see which sticks because destiel shippers were in the audience. Trust me if he was facing an audience full of bro fans he's going to say Dean and Cas were strictly platonic buds. Actors measure the emotional temperature of the room and perform accordingly.

You must be new, Misha has done this before a few times to Jensen, mainly in non-Creation cons like the Jib con in Rome and other fan-run conventions where it's less controlled and more free for all. Back then Jensen stans will get mad for a hot 15 minute until they remember that they need hellers for their campaign to turn SPN from Sam's story to Dean's story. Now that SPN is over, the AAs may or may not remember that Misha, not Jared, is the true villain in their Jensen stories.

This also happens all the time in fan-run conventions since the days of original Star Trek. Piles of general and slash zines were sold in vendor rooms all the time while glorified extras spout off their own theories pandering non-canon ships of their characters to separate fans from their money. It's just nowadays it's more in the open due to general acceptance of the fanfiction medium.

[zillennial97]

My All-Time Favorites | Larry Fanfic Recs

*these works are the closest to my heart and my best recommendations*

Hiding Place by alivingfire | 365k | Explicit

Louis never wanted a soulmate, didn’t really care for the whole Bonding thing at all, really. Enter Harry Styles, who’s wanted to be Bonded for as long as he could remember. With one fateful meeting in an X Factor bathroom, Louis gets a dagger on his arm and the realization that just because Harry is his soulmate doesn’t mean it’s mutual.

From the X Factor house to Madison Square Garden, from the Fountain Studios stage to stadiums across the world, Louis has to learn to love without losing himself completely, because someday his best friend will Bond to someone and replace Louis as the center of his universe. Meanwhile, Harry begins to think that maybe fate doesn’t actually know what it’s doing after all, because his other half has clearly been right in front of him the whole time. All he has to do now is convince Louis to give them a chance.

Or, the canon compliant Harry and Louis love story from the very beginning, where the only difference is that the love between them is literally written on their skin, and there’s only so much they can hide.

And Then a Bit by infinitelymint | 158k | Explicit

“We’d like to give the fans what they want.” Magee states, placing his hand on the table in front of him and leaning forward. “We want to give them Larry Stylinson.”

Or, take a parallel universe where Louis and Harry were never together, mix in a two year hiatus and an impending comeback, pour in a dash of lost fans, two tablespoons of strong friendship and a Modest! employee with a good idea. Add a squeeze of pretending to be a couple, lots of kisses and a tattoo or two. Stir. Serve: the mother of all publicity stunts.

(aka Harry and Louis fake a relationship for publicity. Eventually it becomes a lot less fake and a lot more real.)

Walk That Mile by purpledaisy | 149k | Explicit

Harry stares at him, the line of his jaw standing out scarily. “I wanted to get the most out of this trip so I planned it carefully.” His voice is low and steady and somehow that’s worse than when he was yelling. “So far, you’ve put your sticky fingers on everything I’ve tried to do.”

“Sticky fingers?” Louis repeats, offended. “Are you saying it’s my fault you got stung by a bee? Had you been alone you would have gotten halfway to the Dotty Diner and ran the car off the road because of an allergic reaction, so don’t go blaming me.”

“Polk-A-Dot Drive In,” Harry spits before getting out of the car. He slams the door shut with a deafening reverb and Louis rolls his eyes.- A Route 66 AU where falling in love was never part of the plan.

Unbelievers by isthatyoularry | 136k | Explicit

It’s Louis’ senior year, and he’s dead set on doing it right. However, along with his pair of cleats, a healthy dose of sarcasm and his ridiculous best friend, he’s also got a complicated family, a terrifyingly uncertain future, and a mortal enemy making his life just that much worse. Mortal enemies “with benefits” was not exactly the plan.

Or: The one where Louis and Harry definitely aren’t friends, and football is everything.

California Sold by isthatyoularry | 123k | Mature

Notoriously closeted boyband member Harry Styles is famous on a global scale, meanwhile Louis, as his best friend, is back home in Manchester, living the typical life of a 24 year old. When Harry needs Louis with him in LA, a publicity stunt gone wrong changes their friendship forever.

A fake-relationship AU between two lifelong best friends.

Fucking Animals by pointerbrother | 116k | Explicit

“Just, off the record,” she says, voice lower, eyes sharper, crook of her mouth quirking up a little, “don’t you ever miss it? A good knot? You must.”

Louis blinks and then swallows, thickly. “No,” he exclaims, offended that she’d even ask, “I love my husband. And anyway, how could I miss something I’ve never had?”

---

Louis is the frontman of an equal rights-movement, author of a book about beta-omega marriage and the struggles of being born and boxed into a personality you don't necessarily feel you fit. The notion that an omega must want to be with an alpha or else he or she's just settling for less, is bullshit.

But, fucking hell.

we're not friends, we could be anything by nooelgallagher, yoursongonmyheart | 115k | Explicit

Louis narrows his eyes at Harry. “What that supposed to be a fucking joke?”

Harry narrows his eyes right back. “It was a good joke.”

Louis rolls his eyes. “Jokes require laughter, Curls.” Louis glances down at Harry’s thighs again, Christ. “Your pants must be so tight they’re restricting airflow to your brain.”

Harry wipes a bead of sweat off his forehead. “Pretty sure yoga is supposed to increase airflow, blood flow, and all that,” he responds dryly, finally jumpstarting himself and walking away from Louis towards his own bedroom.

Louis can’t help but stare at his broad back, still sheen with drying sweat, and his perky bum in the tight yoga pants.

Louis swallows. Christ.

...Or, the one where Harry and Louis are unlikely uni flatmates who definitely don't like each other and definitely won't fall in love (even if Liam and Niall think otherwise).

Tired Tired Sea by MediaWhore | 113k | Mature

As a B&B owner on the most remote of all the British Isles, Louis Tomlinson is used to spending the coldest half of the year in complete isolation, with his dog and the sea as sole companions. Until, one day, a mysterious stranger on a quest to rebuild himself rents a room for the winter.

Our Lives, Non-Fiction by indiaalphawhiskey | 113k | Explicit

Heralded as the next Neil Gaiman, Louis Tomlinson does not appreciate being told that his very serious novel is in dire need of a PR boost. Even worse, that it comes in the form of a joint book tour with the UK’s #1 online romance-writing sensation Marcel Styles. Already turbulent at best, their partnership takes a drastic turn when, overly stressed about his looming deadline, Marcel accidentally blurts out a secret: though he’s famed for his scorching hot literary love scenes, he is, actually, a virgin.

Convinced that the only way to rid himself of writer’s block is to gain some experience, Marcel asks Louis, author-to-author, to sleep with him – for Science. And of course Louis agrees because, well, what on Earth could possibly go wrong?

Or, a lesson in romance that proves that sometimes the best love stories aren’t always by the book.

You’ve Got My Devotion (Hate You Sometimes) by lucythegoosey | 95k | Explicit

Harry was in the biggest boy band in the world. He was also one half of the best (or worst, depends on who you ask) kept secret relationship in the music industry.

Now, almost five years on, after One Direction has broken up, and Harry and Louis' relationship has as well, a video threatens to put everything at risk.

One determined Irishman, a massive publicity stunt and two begrudging exes are all it takes to bring One Direction back to life and maybe, just maybe, Harry and Louis' mangled love life too.

Or: Harry and Louis are forced to fake-date after an old video from when they were dating emerges.

This Wicked Game by cherrystreet | 70k | Explicit

An AU in which The Bachelor is gay, Louis is a contestant, Harry is the bachelor, everyone drinks a lot of champagne, the entire world gets to watch them fall in love, and no one plays by the rules.

Christmas-ing With You by dolce_piccante | 65k | Mature

Two writers from Loving Heart Television, the premiere network for holiday romance films, find that, sometimes, love is not only in their works of fiction.

Barefoot in Blue Jeans by indiaalphawhiskey | 24k | Explicit

AU. Louis Tomlinson is trying desperately hard not to fall for his son’s au pair, but he can’t, for the life of him, remember why.

475. The hope that this fear is unfounded.

[givrali]

hi gamers im pretty much finished with my playthrough of pokemon shining pearl, i have about 80 hours on there right now so heres my review!

i dont normally post game reviews but since many of you know me as that sinnoh loving guy i figured reviewing a game i wanted for such a long time, a remake of one of my fav generation's pokemon games would make sense, and its easier to post that kind of thing on tumblr so here it goes. also this whole review is spoiler-free.

summary - i really like this game and i recommend it to anyone who loves diamond and pearl or has interest in playing them for the first time! they fix a lot of issues with the originals however there are many missed opportunities thatll talk about under the cut. this game is a good return to form of the adventure that many of us older fans felt when we first played these games as kids. i do not want this to seem like a huge blow to these games but they are not without flaws either.

graphics:

I know the chibi art style was a huge miss by many fans when it was first shown off, but ive always found it cute and fitting of the game. in its final form, the graphics of bdsp are very charming and cute and the natural scenes and backgrounds are better than theyve ever been in a mainline title. this game really does feel like how we would have imagined it as kids! the top-down style works best for this type of game and its very polished. if you still arent sold on the style, i promise that if you just get into the game and start playing it for a bit itll convince you. also this game lacks screen tearing that the originals had (yay!) and the overworld is a lot nicer to look at color-wise.

music:

I have to say i was kind of worried about what they'd do with the music, because it is probably my favourite out of the whole series, but its actually breathtaking and many tracks are a million times better than they were before. they really emphasized the jazzy-ness of this game's music which i really appreciate haha. they even added some new tracks for the post-game area and also the DS sounds key item which is so so great.

new additions:

bdsp greatly expands on the underground feature by letting you catch pokemon down there! this is a feature i never knew we needed but now that we have it oh man i could never go back. its so fun hunting for pokemon down there and digging for statues. i do kinda wish there was more multiplayer stuff you could do down there, cos rn all you can do really is dig together, but honestly thats fine by me since i didnt even get to do That in the originals.

this game also changes how contests work compared to the original dppt. i do kind of miss being able to dress up your pokemon but i do have to wonder how that would even work in a 3d game. anyway i do like the new "rhythm game" approach to pokemon super contests. they are a lot faster to do than they were before so you can do more of them in less time. sometimes the old one felt like rng cos you had to perform moves to a judge and just kinda hope no one else picked the same judge as you. i havent done a whole lot of the new contests just yet but as of now it seems like a welcome change.

bdsp also introduce walking pokemon in the overworld in almost every area, when before you could only walk with a select few in amity square. i think walking pokemon is always a welcome addition but its a bit strange to me how it was done in bdsp. its a huge upgrade from sword and shield (dlc) though i have to say. it really kinda sucks in those games because your pokemon will run to catch up with you and constantly bump into you. they dont do that as often in bdsp but there are times where if you have a slower pokemon they will just never walk with you and are always teleporting about. i think hgss really mastered the walking pokemon because they were always at the same rhythm as you were, and it just seems very half-baked into every other game they've tried to add it into since. (except let's go....it's actually pretty good in let's go.)

also, its worth mentioning that the sinnoh games are no longer extremely slow. youve all seen the meme with blissey and close combat right? yeah that doesnt happen anymore, neither does saving a lot of data (rip), and you surf faster than a snail now.

but the biggest and best feature that bdsp added was the hidden moves app in the poketch. basically, you no longer need to teach a pokemon an hm move (a field move that cannot be forgotten under normal circumstances) you can just open your watch with the R button and use a hidden move from there. its extremely handy and id recommend these games over the originals just for this feature alone. dppt have the most hms required at once time out of the entire series and not having to worry about them anymore is a HUGE plus. you can also access your pc boxes out in the overworld too instead of having to go to a pokemon center, which is awesome.

missed opportunities:

ok, now as we get into some more negative parts I have to say, yes I am aware that this game was never supposed to be a platinum remake. its a faithful remake of diamond and pearl, it is exactly what it says on the tin. (i have to say this phrasing has bugged me since the start, though, it feels like an oxymoron. of course a remake is going to be faithful?) and you know, they did add some platinum dex mons into the game via the underground feature i mentioned earlier. but my issue is, why did they only add some of them and not all? why pick and choose which pokemon we can access when the entirety of the platinum dex IS IN the game? we already know about the rotom in the old chateau and the gift eevee from bebe so why not let us access those? they seem to be walled off for absolutely no reason. and there are still so many of gen 4's added evolutions that you just cannot access within the main story, such as gliscor that you have to wait til postgame for. there is no point to these restrictions so why have them? it was literally not like that in platinum, so why go back to it? and i also like some of the changes to the gym order and designs inside the gyms they did in platinum. but plat is my fav pokemon game of all time so of course i am biased in that regard.

i also have to say that not using platinum teams for trainers like flint and volkner was a missed opportunity too. i like that gym leaders added new moves and abilities onto their team members to keep the battles fresh, but why did we have to go back to these stinky teams when we did it right in platinum? it just seems like two steps forward, one step back to me.

and this is a pet peeve to me but....where is looker???? he hasn't been in gen 8 at all???? he was introduced in gen 4 so....why not bring him back now? and where is the battle frontier gamefreak i want answers.

as for the story, ORAS is one of my fav pokemon games and i love how they freshened up the hoenn region in that remake, and i would have loved for something similar in BDSP. they ended up not doing that and we still have a good game on our hands here with bdsp, but i do think it could have been even better. i think remakes should set out with the goal to transcend the originals and create a definitive version of that generation's game. i think bdsp fell a little bit flat in that regard. we still have legends arceus coming out in about a month though. I do think that this is going to be the game that transcends and im really excited for it! but i think bdsp could have been more too.

also, why did they go back to single use tms? who is responsible for this??? i need a word.

another peeve of mine is that they did not add any pokemon past gen 4. as a kid i desperately wanted to bring my gen 5 favs into sinnoh, so that was a huge blow. again, they should have done it like oras. i dont think anyone would have minded if most of the later-gen mons were post-game anyway. and im not going to mention megas much but i like them and they would have fit so well here ok bye

glitches and crunch:

if youve been following these games since launch you know that they come with their fair share of glitches. of course, most pokemon games do. they are known for it, really. and most of them, even in bdsp, dont really come into play during your actual playthough, you have to actually go out and initiate them, and many of them are being patched right now. however, this game was also released unfinished, with a day 1 patch being required to download in order to get all of the cutscenes, music, and more. now personally i dont agree with that practice...i grew up in the sticks with the worlds slowest wifi, and i was also the type of kid who wanted to play their new games on the ride home. if your game needs an internet connection to download half of your game, that's just annoying. i know that's just the way nowadays...other consoles do it all the time, when you buy a ps4 game on the disc you have to wait for it to download too. in the age of internet its easier to patch games. back when the gba games had a glitch in them (look up ruby and sapphire berry glitch) you had to send your game back or go to a special kiosk to fix it. now you can just leave your switch on at night to download the updates. so while i definitely disagree with this decision, i can see why they did it. i really hope that doesnt become a mainstay for pokemon games going forward. its a real hassle, and encourages the harsh deadlines that nintendo and gamefreak have in place to continue.

challenge level/difficulty:

this game has a....weird level curve in it. it uses the gen 7.5/gen 8 experience share, which means that every pokemon in your party gets experience after you defeat or catch a pokemon. you are not able to turn this off, but you can put pokemon into your pc boxes to stop this effect. anyway, the original games did not have this, and were not designed around it. Around the 3rd gym or so i really felt the effect of it. my team was really getting up there in levels, and it doesnt help that the 3rd and 4th gyms are the same levels, either. so yeah it was getting clear that i was overleveled and the gym leaders and boss fights started to get kinda easy. ok, you might say, of course they were, its a kids game and a game and one that ive played before. not everyone is going to have that experience. however, the pokemon in the underground scale to your badge level, meaning they are typically around your level or higher when you go down there after a gym battle. meaning. you are going to get your ass handed to you down there. but then...not by any of the trainers in the story? probably not until the elite four, who each have ev-trained pokemon (this means they have really beefed up stats that compliment what moves theyre gonna use) with competitive battling move-sets and items. and then the champion, who has a completely cracked competitive team with items on all 6 pokemon. now many of us were thinking that they would dumb down the champion battle, but they beefed it up so so much. as an adult player of the series i really do like this level of challenge. even if youre just doing a vanilla playthrough its bound to be a little difficult. i mean it took me 3 tries! and then if youre a kid playing this game....well its never been easier to grind in a pokemon game than in gen 8. so...i dont know what to say about this i just think the difficulty in this game is kind of lopsided at times.

should you play?

as a new player: yes! these games are more accessible than the og diamond and pearl, which go up WAY past the $60 msrp if you want a legit copy. and with the additions in quality of life i think they are definitely worth it. also, they have online play which the old ones dont anymore. you can emulate, sure, i won't stop you, but if you do emulate either dppt or bdsp you wont have the multiplayer aspect either way. multiplayer adds a lot of mileage to a pokemon game.

as a veteran player: yes! these games miss a lot of content from platinum and are basically the same story, i won't deny that. but they are full of nostalgia for if you love gen 4 and have felt like newer games have been missing the mark. and if you didnt like gen 4, a lot of its issues are solved here like the hm one. this is a good opportunity to give it another chance.

[watchmegetobsessed]

Celebrity crush - Tom Holland

just a little something i thought about today!

word count: 3.1k

masterlist

“So this is how it’s gonna go. We’ll give you two options to choose from, you’ll say who you would rather choose to be your man, we’ll keep him and you’ll get a new face on the other side. Clear?” Ellen explains the game of ‘Who’d you rather’ to you as you nervously sit in the comfortable armchair. You shoot the audience a nervous look nodding your head.

“Sounds cool,” you clear your throat bracing yourself to whatever is about to come.

“Great, let’s see our first candidates!” she announces and you turn to the huge screen behind you when two faces appear next to each other. “We have Liam Hemsworth and Ansel Elgort. Who do you choose?”

“Um, tough start, I’ll go with Liam,” you say nodding to yourself. You’re satisfied with your choice.

“Alright next up we have Liam and…” Ansel’s face disappears and it’s replaced by a photo of Dylan Minnette.” Liam and Dylan!”

“Dylan is a cute guy, but I think I’ll stick with Liam.”

“Okay, Liam stays. Let’s see the next one,” Ellen nods and Dylan’s face is now replaced by Harry Styles. “Oh my! Harry or Liam?”

“Oh definitely Harry,” you say before you could even stop yourself from talking and the audience laughs, but totally agrees with your choice. “Just look at him! And I think you purposely used a picture where he has long hair. That was iconic.”

“He really did have all the looks,” Ellen agrees. “Okay, so we have lost Liam, now we are rolling with Harry. Let’s see the next contestant.”

As the picture changes on the screen your answer comes faster than you could even think about who you want to choose.

“Tom!” you snap immediately as Tom Holland’s photo appears on the big screen and the audience starts clapping at your fast response.

It’s been an open secret in your team that your absolute number one celebrity crush is none other than Spider-Man himself. You’ve seen all of his movies numerous times and on your latest birthday your friends even put a shirtless photo of him to your cake. You obviously didn’t post that one, but it did take a better place in your heart than the other, plain one.

“That was… pretty fast,” Ellen smirks at you and you can feel your cheeks growing warm at how unfiltered you were.

“I’m just a big fan of his,” you tell her, but your face gives you away.

“Who isn’t? Okay, let’s see the next one. Tom or Nick Jonas?”

“Tom,” you say without even giving Nick a second thought.

“Seems like we are picking up the pace of the game. Alright, Tom or… Zac Efron?”

“Tom.”

Ellen laughs at your eagerness to keep Tom, but she keeps going for two more rounds where you keep choosing Tom over Cole Sprouse and Taron Egerton, until his photo finally moves over to the middle as the winner.

“So I guess we have a winner over here. You didn’t seem to be willing to even look at anyone after Tom.”

“I told you, I’m a big fan of his,” you tell her with a shy, but flirty smile as you fix your designer dress and cross your legs.

“Have you—Have you ever met him?”

“Unfortunately not yet, but I’m hoping our paths will eventually cross. I’m a Spidey fan, seen all the movies and he is definitely my favorite so far.”

“What would you tell him if he was here now?”

You are quick to turn around and check he is not creeping his way up to you right now. You can never know what Ellen has in store for you, she is the queen of surprises when it comes to her show.

“He is not here, don’t worry,” she laughs as you sit back with a relieved sigh.

“I had to make sure,” you chuckle. “Anyway, my message to him is that if he ever wants to come and see my show, I can get him a free backstage pass,” you say and then flirtatiously wink at the nearest camera as the audience starts cheering.

“Tom, I hope you’re watching this and you are gonna take the next step. Y/N is waiting for you!” Ellen smirks before moving on with the second part of your interview.

Few days after the taping the interview finally airs and the internet goes crazy over your crush on Tom Holland. Your fans even make memes and montages of the two of you, some of them make you laugh hard when you are scrolling through your feed on your rehearsal.

To be honest, you thought it would be the end of the story, you quickly moved on since you had a sold out show next Saturday and you were in and out of rehearsals in the upcoming days, not even paying a second thought to what went down at the interview.

Saturday afternoon you are sitting at makeup when Rita, your manager walks in with the widest grin on her face you’ve ever seen.

“What’s gotten you so happy?”

“Guess who I just gave three passes to?”

You think to yourself, but don’t really have a valid guess. Unfortunately, Rita doesn’t want to give out the information that easily.

“Okay, if you can’t guess you’ll have to see it yourself. Pay extra attention to the VIP sector on the right tonight,” she hints before walking out.

“Rita! You can’t just not tell me!” you shout after her, but she is gone.

She successfully made you go crazy over who is going to be in the audience tonight, but also made sure no one gives you the info before the start, so you have to see it during the show.

“I fucking hate you,” you growl at her as you stand behind the stage, getting ready to start. The intro is already playing and the hairstylist is finishing up your hair one last time.

“Make sure to put extra effort into the Harder choreo today,” Rita winks at you and you scoff at her. Harder is one of your steamiest songs, and the dance you perform on stage is definitely a hot one where you truly feel like a badass woman in your tight, revealing costume.

The show starts off great, the crowd is going crazy and you are grateful to be with your fans tonight, but your eyes keep wandering over to the side where you are supposed to see the mysterious guest, but the lights are too bright for you to see anything other than pitch black. All lights are dimmed when Harder comes on and the red lights give just the perfect heated atmosphere the song needs. You’re wearing your skintight bodysuit and knee high boots, hair let down as you do your sexy dance with your female dancers in the back. In the middle of the song you go over to the right side where you are supposed to do a short routine on a chair, one of your favorite parts in the whole show. Singing the lines you sit down to the chair that was already waiting for you and just as you open your knees wide your eyes meet a familiar gaze and you almost forget to sing.

Tom Holland is standing in the VIP section with his pass hanging from his neck, he has his two brothers with him, but you pay little attention to them as you keep performing with your eyes glued to his handsome face.

Taking Rita’s advice you make sure the rest of the choreography is as sexy and heated as possible and you occasionally keep glancing in Tom’s direction who seems to be enjoying the show. It gives you the boost to bring the best out of yourself, he is smirking with amusement in his eyes and you catch him say something to his brothers from time to time who just nod in agreement. You’d die to know what his words were, but you can only hope he’ll come backstage after the show and you can ask him yourself.

By the end of the concert you are bursting from energy and this show will definitely be in your top ten for the rest of your life. You’re panting but grinning widely as you run off the stage and do a quick group hug with your dancers, something you never miss after every show as an appreciation and celebration of the good work you just did.

As you head to your dressing room you spot your manager who has a devilish smile on her face and you almost start lashing out on her, but then none other than Tom Holland shows up coming from the arena. You stop in your way as your eyes meet, eyebrows running up on your forehead when you see the big bouquet of flowers in his hands. He gifts you with a soft, shy smile, the one you’ve seen so many times on the big screen, but it’s a thousand times sweeter in real life.

“Hey!” he greets you waving in your way, as if you haven’t seen him. You don’t see anyone else in the room, to be quite honest.

“Hi! I… didn’t know you were coming tonight,” you admit tugging your hair behind your ear and you wish you felt less sweaty and smelly. You can only hope it’s not as bad as you think.

“I took your invitation serious,” he chuckles making you smile.

“I honestly didn’t think you’d ever see that, sorry if it was… too silly or something,” you tell him with a nervous laugh. It wasn’t in your plans to face him so fast after you admitted to the whole world that you have a fat crush on him.

“Well, it was hard not to see it when literally everyone was tagging me in posts about it.” He then realizes the flowers are still in his hands and steps closer. “Oh, I brought these for you. I hope it’s not too big of a cliché, but I wanted to give you something after the show.”

“That’s so sweet, thank you!” you tell him completely touched by the gesture as he hands you the beautiful bouquet. “Did you like the show?” you innocently ask, his look imprinted in your mind as he watched you in awe from the audience.

“It was fantastic! Really, mind-blowing. All the dancing and everything, I didn’t even know where to look.”

“Well, I saw you looking at me pretty often,” you flirt and hope you’re not being too bold. But there’s no way you are wasting this chance with Tom Fucking Holland, your all-time favorite Spider-Man and #ManCrushMonday. Though you haven’t posted about the latter, but you definitely thought about it before.

His cheeks turn red as he laughs nervously, scratching the back of his neck.

“Well, it was hard not to look when you were so breathtaking, to be honest.”

You can’t stop yourself from smiling like a teenage girl at the compliment. Even an idiot could feel that there is in fact something between the two of you and you truly hope he is feeling the same and it’s not just your crush talking from you.

“Hey, you guys should take a picture together,” Harry suggests and you suddenly feel ashamed you haven’t even acknowledged the twins’ presence.

“Oh, yeah, sure! But you guys should come too!” you tell him, but Tom is quick to differ.

“No!” he protests and you give him a surprised look before he corrects himself. “I mean—Let’s take one alone and then with the boys.”

“Okay,” you smile, and judging from the laugh his brothers try to hide you know his reasoning behind it. “I’m sorry if I’m sweaty and all,” you apologize as he stands next to you, curling an arm around your waist while you do the same and hold the flowers with your other arm.

“I think I’m just as sweaty after that show you just put out,” he admits and you can’t hold you laughter back.

Harry takes a few shots of the two of you before he and Sam joins you and a crew member takes a few group photos.

“Well, thank you for coming, I’m glad we got to finally meet,” you tell them, thinking about how you don’t want to part your ways so soon, but you have to start getting ready to leave.

“Me too, it was something to remember forever,” he admits with that same shy smile. “Hey, so I heard the big news that you’ll be performing at the Oscars!”

“Yes, it’s unbelievable! I’m so nervous just thinking about it!” you admit. It’s kind of an understatement, you’ve been practically shitting yourself ever since Rita broke the news for you that you’d be one of the performers at literally one of the biggest events all year.

“Congrats and… I guess we’ll meet in a week then.” The smile on his lips lets you know he is counting on seeing you on another occasion and you are happy he is on the same page as you.

“I guess,” you nod chuckling.

“Would it be too straight forward if I asked for your number maybe? Just to make sure we will meet that night.”

“Strictly for that reason,” you nod with a playful smirk as he hands you his phone and you type your number in quickly.

“I can’t wait to see you again,” he tells you as you hug goodbye to all three of the boys.

“Same here,” you nod before turning around and heading back to your dressing room.

 ***

 The Oscars is just as nerve-wrecking as exciting it is for you. It’s you first time doing such a huge performance and you definitely don’t want to be remembered for giving the worst show of all times. You smile your way through the red carpet even though you could break down in tears any minute. You’ve never felt this nervous before and you don’t like the effect it has on your mindset.

Sitting in your dressing room you are getting ready since your performance is just twenty minutes away. Your glam and outfit is completely done, but you just don’t feel the same in your thoughts.

From a sudden idea you send a text to Tom. It’s been an entire week since the show he attended and he texted you before you could even get back to your dressing room and you’ve been going back and forth ever since. He even FaceTimed you one night and you had a two hours long conversation about the most random things. Tom is easy to talk to and this is exactly how you imagined him. Your crush on him has just grown since you met him in real life. In this moment you feel like he is the person you want to talk to, but you doubt he even has his phone on him.

For your biggest surprise a reply arrives just seconds later.

“I’m on my way to you.”

It takes you a few moments to process that he indeed just left his seat at the Oscars to come and calm your nerves. Just about two minutes later there’s a soft knock on the door and after you call out, Tom appears in his perfectly fitted suit, looking better than ever and for a split second you forget everything and just think about how damn good he looks in a suit. When you return to reality panic sets back in and Tom can see it all in your eyes.

“Hey! Why are you so upset?” he gently asks as he steps closer to you taking your hands in his.

“I’m just so fucking nervous, what if I mess it up?”

“You won’t.”

“How do you know?” you whine, already seeing the worst things happen to you out there.

“I just know. I know, because you are literally the best. No one else deserves more to be here than you, alright? They asked you for a reason.”

“I’m just so scared something goes wrong,” you sigh, head hanging low, but he is quick to lift your chin up and make you look in his eyes.

“Everything will be alright. And if something do happen… I’ll just jump up to the table and pull my pants down so everyone will look at me and forget about what you messed up,” he tells you in an attempt to make you laugh and it works.

“That would be pretty funny.”

“Yeah? Do you want me to do it anyway?” he asks chuckling.

“No, keep your pants up,” you tell him shaking your head.

The door opens and an assistant pops his head inside.

“Y/N, we need to go, you are starting in five.” You nod your head and turn back to Tom.

“Can you come with me?” you ask him.

“Of course! Do you want me to stay at the side and wait for you?” You nod again, still feeling a little lost, but way better than before Tom arrived. “Alright. Let’s go then,” he smiles at you and the two of you walk out hand in hand.

He walks you all the way to the stage where you get your mic and earpiece, telling you encouraging words all along, calming your nerves as if it was his magical power.

“You got this,” he tells you, squeezing your hand one last time before you head out to the stage.

He was right, you got this. The song you performed was an excellent choice and the audience seemed to love the visuals and the dance. You get a standing ovation at the end and you almost start crying right there. You rush off the stage and immediately spot Tom still standing at the same spot you left him, his eyes and smile filled with pride and glory and your legs are just pushing your forward until you are in his arms, holding him tight, squeezing him happily as you squeal joyfully.

You lean back and your eyes move down to his lips the same time his gaze travels down to yours. In just a heartbeat you lean forward and your lips meet in a sweet, victorious kiss you’ve been waiting for so long. You melt into his lips, fingers tangled in his perfectly made hair as his palms lay flat on your bare back where the dress is not covering your shivering skin.

It takes quite some time for the two of you to let go of each other, one of you always goes in for just one more kiss as the backstage is rushing around you, people are running wildly to get everything in place when the show returns after the commercial break. Yet you just stand there with Tom, completely lost in each other.

“I think…” he starts quietly, a smirk hiding in his lips, “I think we owe Ellen a thank you,” he says making you laugh.

“Definitely,” you nod before pressing your lips back to his.

-

general/forever taglist for Tom Holland

i do separate taglists for different people, but not for different works of mine! if you ask to be on my Tom taglist, you’ll be tagged in all of my Tom fics!

@zaahidahhh�� @shawn-youth​  @wildflower-cth​ @imaginashawnns​ @haute-shawn  @learning-howto-be-myselfx3​ @cutepenguin1​ @madatmendes @harrysleftchelseaboot​ @sunflower6why​

if you’d like to be taken off or added to the list, please let me know!

[pop-punklouis]

top five HL fanfic!!!!

biiiiitch you all know how hard it is for me to choose only 5. but sigh FINE here’s my all-time favorite list that isn’t 5 sorry i can’t choose 😔:

• Here in the Afterglow (89k)

“If you hadn’t noticed, I don’t have many friends,” Louis whispers, the blossom of insecurity in his stomach unfurling and clawing its way into his throat.

Harry is silent for a long time, and then he speaks; a soft, slow uncurl that makes Louis’ stomach shake. “I’ll be your friend.” 1970’s AU. In a tiny town in Idaho, Louis’ life is changed forever by the arrival of a curious stranger.

• Coax the Cold (86k)

England, 1897.

English Professor Louis Tomlinson’s passion for the occult has been a source of mockery and derision for most of his life. When he hears whispers of a travelling freak show newly established in London claiming the existence of a monstrous sea hybrid, half-man, half-fish, Louis sees it as his ticket to credibility amongst his peers. The summer he spends undercover working on the show, however, gives him much more than that.

• Wild and Unruly (124k)

Harry is a cowboy sitting on the biggest oil reservoir in Wyoming, and Louis is the paralegal assigned to pressure him into selling his land.

• This Wicked Game (70k)

An AU in which The Bachelor is gay, Louis is a contestant, Harry is the bachelor, everyone drinks a lot of champagne, the entire world gets to watch them fall in love, and no one plays by the rules.

• Love is a Rebellious Bird (135k)

AU in which the boys still make music. Louis is the concertmaster of the London Symphony Orchestra, Harry is the New! and Exciting! interim conductor/ex-cello prodigy who "has made Mozart cool again" according to Esquire Magazine (Louis hates him immediately, which is definitely why he internet stalked him in his dark bedroom late at night that one time), and Niall is the best. Zayn and Liam are around too.

• Fixated On One Star (53k)

Louis is just a boy with the world on his shoulders, and Harry's just a boy from the wrong side of the galaxy. A little thing like love doesn't stand a chance against a thousand years of war, at least until the right two come along to break the mold.

Or: space Romeo and Juliet AU

• Finding Lou (60k)

Louis is the nomadic stranger who wanders into Harry’s bookstore. Harry is the skeptic who falls for him.

• California Sold

Notoriously closeted boyband member Harry Styles is famous on a global scale, meanwhile Louis, as his best friend, is back home in Manchester, living the typical life of a 24 year old. When Harry needs Louis with him in LA, a publicity stunt gone wrong changes their friendship forever.

A fake-relationship AU between two lifelong best friends.

• Empty Skies (134k)

For three years, Harry has been running from his past. Now, he is moving to London and pledges to fulfil his only dream -- making it big in the music industry. Not everyone has a place, though, and the competition is tough. As is his past catching up on him.

Louis is part of the biggest boy band of the world, and getting there had meant a lot of hard work, as well as sacrificing parts of his heart and soul. He's still happy. Maybe not as happy as he could be, but who is he to complain?

• And Then a Bit (159k)

“We’d like to give the fans what they want.” Magee states, placing his hand on the table in front of him and leaning forward. “We want to give them Larry Stylinson.”

Or, take a parallel universe where Louis and Harry were never together, mix in a two year hiatus and an impending comeback, pour in a dash of lost fans, two tablespoons of strong friendship and a Modest! employee with a good idea. Add a squeeze of pretending to be a couple, lots of kisses and a tattoo or two. Stir. Serve: the mother of all publicity stunts. (aka Harry and Louis fake a relationship for publicity. Eventually it becomes a lot less fake and a lot more real.)

• Dream Awake (31k)

The sun leaks through the tent wall behind him the way it leaks through eyelids, bathing the boy in an ethereal half-light as he croons. The crowd is mesmerized. Louis is mesmerized. This is the most important person in the world, he thinks wildly, and then can't figure out how to take it back.

On a hazy day in August, Louis sees Harry perform at a music festival as an unsigned act and convinces him to spend the rest of the weekend in his company. Harry gets signed; life changes. They never really wake up from the dream.

• Say You’ll Remember (93.5k)

au. louis and harry are best mates that are only half aware that they're also soulmates. alternatively, louis goes to university and harry travels the world, and they always manage to find their way back to each other.

takes place over nine years, in which they love and hurt, make mistakes and learn, and above all, grow.

• Outwit, Outplay, Outlast (61k)

Survivor All-Stars AU in which Harry and Louis are just in this game to win the million dollars, but they end up with something better.

Featuring Harry's yellow swim shorts, Louis in snapbacks, and OT5 shenanigans.

• Nothing Else But Us Right Here (35k)

Louis sighs and gives himself a mental pep talk as he smooths his jumper down over his hips. He can do this. He can resist the draw of Harry Styles, because he is a responsible, mature adult, and as much as he wants to tangle his fingers in that mess of hair and map those ridiculous tattoos with his tongue, he does not want to get his daughter’s favorite teacher fired.

• Wings to Break Your Fall (103k)

strip club AU. Harry’s work and family are keeping him busy. He really isn’t looking for a relationship, doesn’t want one. He just wants Louis. Problem is, Louis has other plans.

• Leave it to the Breeze (81k)

Louis couldn’t be prouder of his bake, but there’s something—there’s something. Something about Harry Styles and the earnest way he measures, pours, mixes, scrapes. Something about the tip of his tongue poking out of his mouth as he knocks the air out of his batter.

or a great british bake off au in which louis cares about winning and winning only, harry is made of sunshine and rainbow sprinkles, and niall sticks his nose into other people's business. also featuring liam as louis's best friend-slash-concerned mother, and zayn as a macaron connoisseur.

• You Come Beating Like Moth’s Wings (81k)

Harry smiles. He's only known Louis for about two hours, knows nothing about him past his first name, but he's nice and sarcastic and helpful and so, so pretty. And Harry's still got a few days left in Barcelona, and he thinks he wouldn't mind spending them with Louis.

Also known as, Harry takes the summer before uni to travel Europe and meets Louis in Barcelona, and they end up traveling together.

• Hold Me Closer (36.5k)

Louis Tomlinson is one of the most promising dancers of the English National Ballet, on track to become the youngest principal dancer in the company's history. That is, until forces conspire to significantly complicate his life, including: a surprise ballet, an unfairly attractive guest choreographer, and being pushed into a rivalry with his best mate. Featuring lots of wine, dancing, pining, and a happy ending.

• In Vogue (121k)

Fashion AU. Louis is the editor in chief of Vogue magazine, and Harry's running British GQ. Featuring Zayn as the crazy creative director and Louis' confidant, Liam as the sports writer that gets to sit front row at fashion week and DJ Neil as the only sane person in the whole story. (There are no skinny jeans in this fic)

• These Things Will Never Change for Us at All (1.5k)

The room falls silent as they stay wrapped up in each other. Harry can feel Louis’ soft breaths on his neck, and he almost thinks Louis’ fallen asleep until he says softly, “How did you know you were in love with me?”

Or, Harry and Louis look back on five years.

• A Runaway American Dream (15k)

AU. they take route 66 with only each other and their secrets.

• Things Have Gotten Closer to the Sun (49k)

it’s strange, making the choice to face his past—it almost feels like he’s heading for the sun straight on, like he’s screaming come on and burn me, i deserve it.

when a solar flare is announced to end the world in twelve days, harry reunites with the people that he used to know better than the back of his own hand.

• Here (in your arms) (60k)

the one where Louis is a successful real estate agent and Harry works at a retirement home. They’ve never had a real home. Up until now.

(Starring Liam Payne as a fitness trainer, Zayn as an artist, and Niall, who busks.)

• These Inconvenient Fireworks (190k)

Future AU in which nobody tries out for X Factor but the boys end up finding one other eventually anyway. Louis is a jaded bastard who owns a cat named Duchess and teaches drama to teenagers, Harry is an idealistic aspiring photographer/part-time footy coach, Zayn teaches English lit and wears leather jackets, Liam saves people from burning buildings, and Niall is Niall.

• In Dreams (23k)

AU. When Harry moves to a new city, his new flat come with a number of sweet, anonymous gifts and surprises that brighten his days. Could it be a friendly ghost? Another friendly presence in his new building is his tattooed neighbor, Louis, who seems determined to put a smile back on his face.

• My Heart is Breathing for this Moment in Time (160k)

When Louis first saw Harry at the 2010 X Factor Auditions, he thought he was watching a peculiarly special stranger. But Harry has known Louis ever since he was five years old. Because Louis has a rare genetic disorder that causes him to Time Travel to important moments in his past and in his future - and to Harry, always to Harry. When they’re put into a band together, it seems like everything Harry has been waiting and wishing for has finally come true. Except for the small fact that Louis doesn’t know that Harry is in love with him- that Harry’s always been in love with him. Fate, it would seem, is just getting started.

A story about growing up and growing together, and the impossible love that makes it all worthwhile.

• Paint the Sky with Stars (63k)

On 10 April 1912, Harry Styles boards the finest ship the world has ever seen. Still grieving the death of their mother, he and his sister are being sent to America to live with a callous uncle who cares more about his business connections than family. Harry prepares himself for a long, disappointing voyage alone in his stateroom. Louis Tomlinson has borrowed and saved, and finally has enough to purchase a Third Class ticket to America. With all of his belongings in a single ruck sack, he boards the Titanic filled with hope for a brighter future. Never one to sit still, he can’t resist exploring the massive ship, and soon goes sneaking into First Class in a stolen steward’s uniform. By a twist of fate, Louis finds himself in Harry’s stateroom, entranced by the most attractive man he’s ever laid eyes on. He keeps returning day after day, even if he doesn’t understand what it is about Harry that continues pulling him in. That’s all right; Louis has a week to figure it out, and Harry is plenty willing to help. Except they don’t have a week. They have four days. Because on 15 April, their entire world will be turned upside down.

Or, the historically accurate Titanic AU with a happy ending.

• Through Eerie Chaos (102k)

For as long as anyone can remember, Old Hillsbridge Manor has always been believed to be haunted. Everyone in the village agrees and keeps a respectful, fearful, distance. New in town after a bad breakup and an internship that led to disappointment rather than a permanent job, Harry Styles figures taking pictures of the decrepit building could be a great new creative project. Or at least a much-needed distraction while he searches for a job and crashes at his parents’ new house. No one warned him about the apparitions though; about the music, the laughter, the people who flicker and vanish when you call after them, the echoes of a past that should be long gone… Harry has never believed in spirits but even he can admit that there’s something weird going on. What starts as mere curiosity evolves into a full-blown investigation and soon enough, Harry finds himself making friends with an aristocrat from the 1920s and struggling with finding the best way to tell him that he’s dead.

The Ghost Hunter AU where Niall lives to prove ghosts are real, Zayn is a skeptical librarian and Harry gets caught up in a century-old mystery and catches feeling in the process.

[howdoyousleep3]

Hello and Happy Friday! Let us consider:

Three-Day Weekend Daddy.

This started as a harmless and specific Headcannon that turned into a pairing and version of Steve that I...well I just can’t stop fucking thinking about. This has always been my favorite gif of Evans and I am downright tickled that this has morphed into something that will never leave my mind.

This is definitely Stucky (I know my other HCs haven’t been) and definitely the longest Headcannon I’ve ever posted so as per usual, I advise you to buckle up. :)

This Steve actually is a little bit of a rich Daddy but it’s new money, like he sold his start up or something, was self-taught on the skills he used to build his own company up from the ground

He likes to work with his hands, doesn’t want to change anything he’s been doing all along simply because he has the money now

Mows his own lawn, tampers with his motorcycle and car, attempts to fix household problems before calling in an expert

Is intelligent, a quick-learner, a universal natural talent

Could not put a number on the amount of trucker hats he owns

Never takes himself too seriously

Owns a boat

Is extremely tan in the summertime, never wears a shirt, waves at everyone when they’re on the lake

Likes to take care of his body but does not believe in cardio, has a tiniest bit of a soft lower belly that he complains about, but loves beer too much to do anything about it

Bucky fucking gags for it, kisses at his belly--wet, open-mouth, sloppy as all hell--on his way down for a suck job 

Speaking of Daddy’s lil’ bunny...

Bucky comes from a background with a slightly higher place in society than Steve did (which Bucky isn’t particularly a fan of and probably why it was easier to fall for Steve) and so sometimes he ends up teaching Steve little things

The first time Steve meets Bucky’s parents at a nice dinner place Bucky has to kind of whisper to Steve under his breath about which spoon to use and where his water glass goes 

Takes Bucky to dates at expensive seafood places and also Waffle House

Bucky jokes about taking ballroom dancing lessons and Steve fucking makes that happen, looks like a fucking fool trying to follow Bucky’s natural grace but he’s smiling like he won the lottery the whole damn time

Wakes up hard damn near every morning, nibbles on Bucky’s shoulder, his ear, “can’t help it, darlin’, not when I wake up with my dick nestled between these sweet cheeks, goddamn”

They stumbled upon the appeal of the Daddy Kink by complete accident

“Look at you: mowing the lawn, pulling weeds, working on your bike, marinating steaks-- you somebody's Daddy or somethin’?” Bucky jokes one day but it results in Steve pressing Bucky in tight against the counter, whispering in his ear, “You wan’me to be your Daddy, baby? I’ll be your Daddy, darlin’...”

And then Bucky is just so fucking knocked off his feet by the never-ending onslaught of his own arousal that ‘Daddy’ is actually the only word he can form when Steve puts him chest-down on the kitchen counter and fucks his ass so hard the cabinet doors won’t stay closed

This Daddy lives for three-day weekends where he can spend time outside and invite people over...

Bucky feels like a little housewife when he brings Steve a glass of water (“it’s hot, you need to stay hydrated. You can’t always drink beer, punk”) or beer or lunch and Steve squeezes at his hips or his ass, kisses him sloppy on the cheek, “Look at’chu, thank you, honey...”

It’s a really hot fuckin’ day and Steve is definitely overdue for a haircut, but Bucky just can’t stop staring at the little droplets of sweat that collect at the tail of each tendril of Steve’s hair where it sticks out from under his hat to lay against Steve’s neck

Wears swim trunks that hit well above his knees and makes Bucky wanna lick the inside of his thighs, a length that isn’t as masculine as you might expect on Steve “where’s the grill brush” rogers, but it somehow adds to all that virility seeping out through Steve’s pores

Asks, “What is this song? Who sings this?” to every other song on Bucky’s playlist

Turns his hat around backwards at one point and it’s how Bucky knows he’s a little tipsy, a little loose

Bucky has to tell him to put on a shirt when he goes to grill but Steve is a stubborn sonofabitch and Bucky doesn’t fight too hard because Daddy looks good in front of that grill, beer in one hand, tongs in the other, broad and glistening all over

Steve is always asking what kind of beer Bucky is drinking and asking him if he likes the taste of that one, the hops in this one, offering suggestions on what he might try next, not because Steve is a beer snob but because he just wants to keep tabs on what Bucky likes to drink so he can buy more next time and just because he thinks it’s interesting to know his baby’s thoughts on that kind of stuff

Jokes about a hot dog eating contest with a wink thrown Bucky’s way

Wrestles and tosses Bucky into the pool, jumps in anyway after Bucky pouts, “Goddamnit, Bucky…”, yanks his shirt over his head, dives in

Sneaks hot and heavy kisses against the side of the house like a couple’a teenagers

Fucks like an animal after spending the day being handsy and teasing and looking at Bucky in his swim trunks, strutting around the yard in front of all their fucking friends, and maybe some other Daddy might get jealous ‘cause‘a that but it only makes Steve grin like a damn wolf who’s just put eyes on tonight’s dinner...

Bucky has never wanted Steve’s cock in his mouth more, sucks him off right there on the kitchen floor when everyone leaves, Steve’s trunks barely pulled down his thighs enough, “Fuck, baby, you spent all day thinkin’ about havin’ Daddy’s dick to suck on?”

“Do that thing with your tongue again, that thing from last -- yeah, fuck that’s nice” and “Come on, honey suck on Daddy’s balls, there ya go. Fuck…”

A lot of grinding and pushing and pressing, this Daddy a handsy motherfucker, picks up Bucky right from the floor, hands under Bucky’s armpits, under his ass, carries him up the stairs

Does a lot of “every man” physical labor in the yard, moving furniture etc., and his body isn’t just a machine that he’s gotta work on like his bike, but more like a house that he lives in and knows every detail

Which means that Steve knows his own strength -- even after three or four beers -- and doesn’t actually have to try and be careful with Bucky when he’s tossin’ him around

He’s carefree and confident enough that he trusts his own touch, and it makes everything more passionate and intense for Bucky because if Steve wants to grind on him or squeeze on him or love on him with all of his muscle and bone then he’s just gonna do that, gonna do whatever feels good

Steve wants Bucky on top when they finally get to the bed, wants to feel him all over, run his hands up those thighs, wants to bite at those pretty nipples

Both smell like chlorine and sunscreen, Steve’s beard smells like grill smoke

Stops halfway to orgasm and tells Bucky to turn around, to be Daddy’s little reverse cowgirl so he can spread his cheeks and smush ‘em together and watch the way his slicked-up cock disappears inside

Eyes half-lidded, smirk tugging at his lips slightly, super vocal

Likes to egg Bucky on, encourages him to take what he wants, but also knows Bucky well and knows when he’s about to come and uses that to his advantage, knows Bucky won’t want to come but know what he loves to hear that pushes him over the edge

Has such a mastery of control over his own body that he can bring Bucky over that precipice even when he’s on his back just by pistoning his hips up in just the right way

Prefers to be the one in control when he comes, loves to roll and fuck the both of them into their climax, a groaner, a biter

Sleeps in a little later, morning snuggles galore, goes out to get breakfast, Steve wakes up first and makes sure that Bucky has a fresh bottle of water on his nightstand, it was hot out yesterday...

Eeeee, who else would do bad bad things for this Daddy? 👋

Love you bunches! 😘😘😘