#feel free to inbox me/ask me if you want my hot take on that because I'm happy to give it but don't want to piss anyone off

[cosmic-expressions]

⋮ ♯; ⤷ YOU'RE MY FAVORITE .ᐟ

alhaitham x fem!reader, smut; tying up, cowgirl, praise, check-ins (cuz they are hot as hell too); marking (hickeys), pretty vanilla if you ask me; idk what else needs a warning wc: 665 (man so close yet so far) a/n: reblogs are nice, lemme know what you think! i wouldn't mind some feedback..... inbox is always open and maybe yall see me here a bit more often in November (unless my studies kill me lol)

having ALHAITHAM tied to the bed, laid bare for your eyes and your eyes only, is almost like a dream come true. and since he came out with this idea, something you always wanted to bring up… of course your body reacted on its own.

“does it feel good? is it tight?” you make sure he’s not in pain, that he’s comfortable because the last thing you want to do is hurt him while fulfilling your little fantasy. but when he assures you all is well, you can’t hide the excitement coursing through you. “you’re so pretty like this… i mean- you’re always pretty and handsome but this is- i really like it like that…”

ALHAITHAM smiles and lets out a little chuckle, his body growing warm and face getting red thanks to your words; also, something about your hungry stare, about you clearly enjoying it, and about pleasing you like that… it gets him going as well.

you straddle his lap, plopping softly on it; the feeling of your soft, plushy thighs against his skin only fuels his desire and need, making him let out a little, somewhat impatient, sound. but you’re no better, feeling him grow harder underneath you, seeing his every reaction, you just can’t help and whimper softly. leaning in, you place your lips on his, kissing him slowly at first, just to get greedy right after.

normally, ALHAITHAM would hold your hips, would have his hands all over you, and would make sure it’s really you on top of him; but not it’s you who gets to touch him all over. getting handsy, he can feel the rough possessiveness in your touch, in every caress and rub.

“you’re so- mmmh, just- perfect,” you mutter between the kisses, humming and moaning quietly. with hands all over his upper body, you graze your fingertips over his muscles, making sure to leave a trace of fiery passion.

“baby-” ALHAITHAM lets out a short groan when you start rubbing yourself against him, a little teasing but also a preparation for what’s to come. “you’re a- you’re a tease-”

“i know, i know,” kissing him again, you continue the slow movements a little more. you two moan into each other’s mouth, bodies reacting and moving in an almost synchronized pace. “just a little more- a little more- i know you can-”

muttering soft praises and encouragements, you trail your lips down, leaving kisses across his cheek, jaw, and neck; in every place you know will get a reaction from him. “

oh- fuck! baby you’re-!” ALHAITHAM groans again, jaw clenching when you finally take him inside you, your tight and slick walls inviting and nestling his cock so sweetly. with your weak moans and whimpers accompanying your movements, it’s just a matter of time for him to go insane.

you reach for his palm and hold it tight, kissing him softly and lovingly, all while you move up and down on him. ALHAITHAM throbs and moans, loving how your hand feels small and warm wrapped around his own. kissing you back, shamelessly eager, ALHAITHAM bucks his hips up, reaching deep inside; reaching and pressing on all the sweet and sensitive places that have you breathless in seconds.

“fuck-! fuck, alhaitham!” you moan and throw your head back, losing it to the pleasure.

he’s fast to suck on your neck and leave soft kisses all over your cleavage, something that became a small habit of his. a little familiar thing, grounding him at the moment; the feeling of your warm skin, of your pulse underneath his lips, the warm and shallow breaths over his ear – it’s all he loves and needs to be sure you feel good and safe with him. safe enough to let yourself free and feral, safe enough to take him like you want and not be ashamed of it. that’s what causes his heart to flutter aggressively in his chest… and to cum inside you immediately, filling you up and stretching you well.

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[seospicybin]

TOO HOT TO HANDLE.

PART I

Bangchan x reader. (s)

Too Hot To Handle Masterlist

Synopsis: You and Chan become contestants in a reality dating show, Too Hot To Handle. (15,7k words)

Author's note: Pls send my birthday wishes to your boyfriend. As always, enjoy and feel free to vent in my inbox :)

CHRIS: Nah, I wouldn't say I'm a playboy [shyly laughs] My best feature? My body [Shows off abs] I'm joking, [laughs] it's my dimples [smiles] I don't have a type. Looks are relative but there has to be a strong physical attraction [Smiles]

-

In this sunny weather, it wouldn't take long for Chan to get some color on his pale skin.

A little tan will help to make his sculpted abs more defined, especially on camera. He's been working out diligently to present his best look for this show.

Lust Island.

What possibly could this show be about? If he should draw any clues from the name of the show itself, he guesses there'll be physical contact involved in a pleasurable way.

The real reason he joined the show is not solely that he wants to get some action. He can get them anytime, anywhere when he wants to.

Bangchan wants to put himself out there and explore things outside of producing music. He wants to push himself out of his comfort zone. By comfort zone, he means his studio.

Once Bangchan puts his swimming trunks on though, he prepares himself, mentally and physically as his name gets called. It's his turn to enter the villa.

When he thinks about it again, it's not the first time he gets to be filmed, and being in front of the camera, there's no use for him to be nervous.

Bangchan laughs at his cowardly thought and puts on a perfect posture, standing straight and broadening his shoulders that are as wide as the Pacific Ocean.

Bangchan is right to be confident about himself because the girls like what they see when he walks in.

There are four of them waiting by the standing table with bottles of champagne in buckets of ice.

The other male guests are no competition to him, a few inches of height difference is nothing when he's confident with his looks.

He goes to introduce himself, giving side hugs to the male and a kiss on the cheek to the female guests. He does his trick to leave a lasting impression by holding their hands and looking them in the eyes as he says his name.

"You can call me Chris," he says with a smile.

She flutters her eyelids at him, a way to get his attention, and says her name, "I'm Lola!"

Lola is a gorgeous, dark-haired girl who speaks like she's half moaning, some men dig it but Chan, not really.

Chan turns to the other female guest and does the same, "Chris," he shortly introduces himself.

"Jane," she introduces back with a thick British accent and it's good to know that he's not the only one who owns pale skin.

"Love the accent," she says with a smile that showcases her perfect white teeth.

"Likewise," he immediately replies and grabs himself a glass of wine.

-

CHRIS: This is the first I have been surrounded by this many beautiful people in one place.

-

To say that he's not the slightest bit attracted would be a lie.

But there are only two of them for now and there'll be more to come, hopefully, there'll be one that attracts him. For now, there's not enough attraction.

However, Lola is refilling his glass without him asking and checking him up and down, doing it not so subtly only tells him that she's attracted to him.

"Thank you," he mutters and has a toast with her.

Two more female guests are entering the villa, one is a stunning blonde with dazzling blue eyes and the other is a tall goddess with golden skin.

The boys are howling in excitement as the selection has expanded. Chan, trapped in the corner with Lola, waves his hand at them.

The blond girl approaches her to hug him, "I'm Dani."

"Chris," he introduces with a smile.

"Australian, huh?" She guesses.

"Guilty!" He says, "What about you?"

"I'm Spanish," she answers which explains the sheer accent in her English, and proceeds to say something in her native language to him.

Once again, Chan doesn't have a type but hearing Dani speak in Spanish does something to him.

"You have no idea what I'm saying, right?" She asks with a flirtatious smile.

"Not at all," he honestly answers and bursts into laughter.

-

CHRIS: Dani is undeniably gorgeous and so is Alicia, so is Lola, so is Jane... [chuckles]

-

Another two male guests enter and one of them is sucking all of the female's attention with a nice body, nice teeth, and a height that Chan doesn't have. But he wouldn't let it belittle him. Physical appearance is nothing without skill and Chan has both.

Everyone is waiting for the last guest to arrive and his glass is magically full again, he turns to the side to see Lola smiling at her.

Chan takes the bottle from her to refill her glass for her, he gets interrupted by the loud cheer of everyone welcoming the last guest into the villa.

"Hi, you sexy bunch!" You greet.

The guy standing next to him, who he believes his name is Iain, puts his hand on his shoulder and gushes at the sight of you, "Man, she's so hot!"

Chan agrees with him. He notices the confident strides and a scintillating smile, he likes seeing those things on a girl.

You start going around, introducing yourself with a cheek-to-cheek kiss at the end of the introduction. When it gets to his turn, Chan is already prepared to impress you.

You lean in close as you ask his name, "Hi, what's your name?"

Chan is gobsmacked by the strong eye contact you're making with him, making him lose his train of thought for a while.

"Chris," he answers.

You let out a soft laugh and lean in closer, "Sorry, can you tell me again?"

He understands that you can't really hear him with everyone chatting to each other all at once mixed with the sound of the waves crashing in the background.

It comes to his advantage to lean in close to your ear and tell him his name, "It's Chris."

"Nice to meet you, Chris!" You say but instead of a cheek-to-cheek kiss, you put your hand around his neck and pull him for a quick hug.

The hug only lasts for a few seconds but he's happy with what he got. He agrees that physical appearance doesn't matter much but your body, oh... it's enough to send his mind wanders so far off from his head.

"Gorgeous!" He calmly beams, it sounds strange because it doesn't match the excitement he has when he looks at you.

Chan doesn't want to come on strong on the first meeting, he knows that he has a lot of time to get to know you and vice versa.

"Thank you," you mutter with a smile.

-

CHRIS: Bright eyes, cute smile... I think I finally found my type. [Grins]

-

Chan hurriedly grabs the bottle of champagne the second he sees you grab a glass. He delightfully fills your glass with the bubbly wine.

"What a gentleman!" You exclaim with a smile.

He fills the glass just right to not overflow it, "The bar is that low, huh?"

You lift the glass but not taking a sip yet, "I usually go for the bad boys," you share.

Chan is aware that he doesn't have the typical look of a bad guy, that would be Jace with his sleeve tattoos and pierced eyebrow. He feels the need to show you that sometimes what's inside doesn't match with the exterior.

He fiercely looks at you and refills his glass next, "I don't look like one?"

You seem to hesitate to give him an honest answer, "Oh, well..."

Chan tips his head to the side and holds intense eye contact with you, "I can be bad if I want to."

"Yeah?" You say with a tone that sounds a little condescending to him.

That only motivates him to prove you wrong but he keeps his calm and shrugs in response.

You bring your glass close to your mouth and ask, "How bad?"

He grins and runs his tongue along the front row of his teeth, he takes a sip of his wine to make you wait for an answer.

"Why don't you find out?" He dares you with a sly smile.

One corner of your mouth raises higher than the other, forming a killer smirk on your face. You clink your glass with him and say, "Can't wait to find out!"

-

CHRIS: The eyes, Gosh! There was so much eye contact, it feels like a foreplay already [laughs]

-

Chan has no clue how the show is going to play out.

Is everyone going to mingle with each other and be free to do whatever they want for the next 30 days? It's possible because everyone is of age and signed the same contracts but he doubts it'll be that easy. It's a TV show, there's always a catch.

The day continues with a tour around the villa, everyone has seen the swimming pools and the small workout area down the beach so it's time to check inside.

Weirdly, everyone is excited about sharing the bedroom, probably because there are five beds and there are ten of them which means, everyone has to find a bed partner.

Chan's eyes dart at you who's sitting on the other bed with Luke, leaning back with your elbows propped against the mattress.

"Oh, it’s nice and quiet," Luke says, testing the bed by rocking it.

You're laughing as your hands fly to your chest, stopping your breasts from bouncing along with the bed.

While everyone else is joining in on the waves of laughter, Chan is busy assessing who else has their eyes on you. Iain is an easy guess but you'll go for someone like Jace, so he has to keep an eye on him too.

-

CHRIS: My eyes are set on a girl and uh... it's hard not to look at her so I refuse– [laughs] I refuse to share a bed with anyone else but her.

-

The boys are gathered on the beach and Chan doesn't know for what reason. He sits on the wooden bench next to Pierre with his blonde hair shining under the bright sun.

"Okay, let's cut the chit-chat!" Jace says.

His tattoed index finger is pointing at Luke, "You go first. Who's your number one?"

"Dani. Absolutely, Dani," Luke answers without a beat, and that only shows how keen he is to win her.

It's an open war, Chan reckons but it's good to know who he's up against so he can set a strategy and try to win.

It's Iain's turn and he simply answers, "Dani!"

So that means Chan's guess is incorrect yet it doubts him if Iain has no interest in you.

Sitting next to him, Pierre answers, "Alicia!"

Pierre then uneasily glances at Luke as he also chooses the same girl with him, "But also, Dani."

Luke scoffs at him and says, "She's cute, I know."

"Please, stop glaring at me!" Pierre jokingly says.

So far, there are three votes for Dani and that's not a surprise, she's one hell of an attractive girl, it just happens that she's not quite caught his attention like you do.

Pierre nudges Chan with his elbow, "Your turn, Chris!"

Chan confidently announces your name as his first choice and says it with a tint of possessiveness as if you were already his. He wants to let them know that he's going for what he wants and no one is going to get in between.

"What do you guys think of Lola?" Jace asks with a shit-eating grin.

Despite the tattoos that cover most of his back and chest, Jace is grinning as he asks everyone about his choice of girl.

"Lola is... Lola is cute," Chan says while rubbing his hands together in front of him.

Pierre agrees with him and nods, "Yeah, she's cute."

"I like Lola," Jace coyly admits.

Jace claps his hands together and points at the three men who are going for the same girl, "I see we have three men in a competition for Dani," he says.

Luke half-heartedly agrees, "The three of us are different so..."

It's a relief that Chan doesn't have any competition or that's what it seems, but he gets curious about the three men.

"Are you guys comfortable stepping on each other's toes?" He asks in pure curiosity.

"As long as Pierre doesn't step on me," Iain chimes in with a laugh, "Just look at his feet!"

All of them burst into laughter as Pierre lifts both feet into the air, showing everyone how big they are. He's a basketball player so that explains but Chan indeed doesn't want to be stepped on by those feet.

-

CHRIS: I say good luck and... may the best man win.

-

There's time left until everyone has to get ready for the welcome party tonight.

Chan can't relax yet just because he's the only one going after you. Two out of those three men will eventually have to choose another girl and he can't just leave it to luck, he needs to make some moves.

He goes to the dressing room only to find Lola and Jane in there, talking while fixing their make-up. Chan feels like interrupting so he goes to the bathroom next even though he's not sure he'll find you there.

He was too haste to think so, he finds you there leaning close to the mirror and dabbing lip balm on your plump lips. The shape your body takes as you bend over the sink, oh... he reminds himself to calm down.

"Hi," he sweetly greets you.

You see him through the reflection in the mirror and greet him back, "Hi!"

He walks over to the sink and leans his side against it, "How are you?"

You slowly turn to the side facing him while capping the tube of lip balm in your hand, "I'm good, great. You?

"Never been better," he answers.

You softly smile and put the lip balm back into a pouch, "So... What do you think going to happen tonight?"

The possibilities are endless but Chan settles on the simplest answer that fits his agenda, "What's going to happen is you and I share a bed."

You crack a low laugh and put one hand against the sink, "You want us to share a bed?"

But what he needs to hear is your answer, "What do you think?"

You consider it for a moment then say, "We'll see."

That's not an answer he wants, it's not even close to enough. Sure, Chan can play it cool but that's not who he is. Returning from the depth of his thoughts, he notices that you're checking him out from head to toe and doing it not so subtly.

Your eyes travel down his body and the next minute, you trap him in your eyes again.

"Are those real?"

"What?" He asks in confusion.

"Those abs," you say with a shy laugh.

He likes a confident girl but seeing you getting shy is endearingly cute.

"Who knows? It could be cake?!" You joke.

"Pinch it then!" He playfully dares you.

You hesitate for a moment, then gently put your fingertips on the sculpted muscles on his stomach and gasp in awe, "I can't even pinch it."

Keep running your fingertips on his skin and you playfully say, "It's so hard."

Standing this close to you with your hands on me is doing things to him. Chan swallows air and tries to keep it cool, "If you keep feeling my abs, I'm afraid it won't be the only thing that's hard."

You giggle yet you run your fingers down his abdomen, only stopping when they meet the waistband of his swimming trunks. He gets the urge to touch you in return and without needing to command, his hand automatically flies to your waist.

In this proximity, he can smell the fruity scent of your lip balm, sweet and enticing, making him want to taste it on your lips.

"Are you a good kisser?" He asks with his voice suddenly turning lower.

You slightly tilt your head to the side and flutter your eyelashes at him, "Why don't you find out?"

It's so attractive of you to say those words back to him in a low, sultry voice and make them weapons to weaken him. Just so you know, it works.

Chan bites his lower lip, impatient to crash them against yours. He puts his hand on the arch of your back, then slowly leans in closer, closer...

The sound of people coming to the bathroom shatters the moment, you laugh it off and gently push him away, "Try again later," you tell him.

You stop by the doorway and turn to look at him to add, "Only if you're lucky."

-

CHRIS: That! Right there! That's my type. [Nodding]

-

The boys are going down to the beach where the party is held.

The theme is Welcome to The Jungle and he dressed as his spirit animal, wolf. He shouldn't feel silly as everyone is also dressed in animal costumes.

The boys each take a glass of drink to fuel up for the night. Jace is the one leading by raising his glass high in the air, "Let's have some fun tonight!" He shouts.

Everyone else is following suit, raising their drinks high in the air and having a toast,

The contestants are only allowed to have three drinks max in one day so Chan doesn't need to worry about getting drunk. one drink is already enough to give him the courage to make a move on you tonight.

"There they are!" Luke says, pointing to the girls making their way down the stairs that lead to the beach.

Chan spots you right away, dressed in a costume of a bird with colorful fur and a pair of majestic wings. Suddenly, he feels like flying toward you.

He couldn't be any faster to get to your side and compliment you, "You're so beautiful!"

You brightly smile and make a pose for him, "Do you like it?"

"Spin for me!" He orders.

You do what he says, spinning on your feet and giggling as you almost stumble on your own foot.

Chan offers his hand to help you steady yourself and grins, "One beautiful love bird, aren't you?"

-

CHRIS: I'm on the hunt tonight! [Howls] [Laughs]

-

The music starts playing and everyone gets together in the middle, either dancing or drinking, or both. Chan can't keep his hands off of you ultimately because he was so close to getting a taste of it.

But that's okay, he likes playing this game of push and pull with you. He may have let you out of his arms but never out of his sight, you're only going as far as he let you.

Everyone is excited, a little tipsy, and sexually charged just in time to continue with a game. Lola takes the center and explains how the game works.

"Since we're all dressed like the animals we are..." she gets interrupted by Jace as he roars and bangs on his chest like the animal costume he's wearing.

"Each one of you will take turns to stand here then do your mating call and if any of you animals is attracted," she pauses to look at everyone before continuing, "You can kiss, bite, grab... whatever you want to do!"

It's an easy game to play and everyone is more than ready to answer some mating calls. Since Lola has taken the spot, she plays with her bunny ears and cutely hops on her feet like a rabbit but mewling like a cat.

Chan turns to Jace who's making eyes at her, crawling and walking like the animal he is dressed in, he playfully climbs her body and kisses her neck.

The others are responding with cheers and hoots, watching them going at each other's faces in front of them. It gets everyone impatient to take their turn.

The game is heating when Dani takes her turn, he can see that the three men in competition are getting ready to take their chance to kiss her and perhaps, try to be the best kisser of all.

Dani doesn't do a mating call of sorts, she just stands there and simply says, "Come and get it!"

Pierre dashes to get to her first and earns the first smooch, Iain and Luke are steadily waiting for their turn to kiss. While everyone else is enjoying the raunchy moment, Chan prepares himself because your turn is next. His eyes are following you as you walk to the appointed spot and turn to face everyone, you're laughing in giddy before trying to whistle as loud as you can.

Chan immediately gets up from his seat, but he hears a terrible lion roar from the other direction and sees Iain make his way to you.

He knows Iain still has an interest in you, but this will be his first and the last kiss he gets from you. He glares at Iain as he walks back to his seat.

Ignoring the rage inside him, Chan puts on his vicious eyes and shows his teeth, taking you by surprise as he sinks his teeth into your right breast, then your neck, and finally, your lips.

Iain kind of ruined this first kiss moment but Chan reminds himself that he'll not let anything get in the way of what he wants and this is what he wants. He holds your face with both hands and presses his lips on yours, he greedily kisses you and tugs your lips between his teeth before letting go.

Jace howls the loudest for him as Chan returns to his seat with a triumphant smile, he can taste the win on your lips, he can tell you fancy him more than Iain.

Chan finally takes his turn after Luke and he knows what he needs to do, he's going to howl like a wolf calling for you. He looks at you and says, "Come on!"

You're slyly smiling at him, pretending not to want to come forward but he knows, he knows you want to.

"I know you want it," He fiercely says, addressing you with his eyes.

You get up and break into running at him, not stopping until your body crashes into him in which he gladly welcomes you into his arms.

This is his chance to redo the first kiss so he kisses you, a little gentler than the previous one yet with the same passion. He puts his hands around your waist and without letting go of the kiss, he hoists you, then wraps your legs around his waist.

You yelp in surprise, but that only allows him to slip his tongue into your mouth and kiss you deeper as he holds you tightly.

"I'm going to take this bird home," he says after the.

Chan carries you back to your seat like the winning prize you are. He then silently glances at Iain with a bragging smile plastered on his face.

-

CHRIS: That's right, everyone. Kindly take your hands off of her because she's mine!

-

A lady walks in and Chan assumes she's the host of the show. She smiles and waves at everyone before talking, "Is everyone having fun?"

Everyone answers with a loud cheer and whistles, showing the host a lot of excitement. They're partying, drinking and they got to grab or bite or kiss, nothing to complain about.

"Okay, okay, I hear you all!" She responds with a knowing laugh.

She claps her hands together and turns on her feet to show a big box behind her, "If you look here, I have a surprise..."

Everyone is cooing in curiosity at the sight of it. Looking at the size of the box, it's safe to say that it fits a person inside.

The host has to wait for everyone to calm down to continue talking, "I am excited to announce that we have a surprise visit to start the show and make it special!"

Jace is whooping the loudest while the girls are whispering, wildly guessing by throwing famous people into the sentences.

"Are you ready to take the party to the next level?" She asks everyone.

"YEAH!!!" Everyone collectively answers.

"Okay then!" She flicks her fingers as a cue, then steps aside.

-

CHRIS: Whatever it is. Whoever it is. I'm ready. Give it to me!

-

Chan turns to look at you and asks, "What do you think?"

You shake your head and grin in excitement, "I don't know but it's exciting!"

Everyone is craning their necks and waiting in anticipation as they turn the lights around the box for a dramatic entrance. The door of the box is swinging opening little by little, it's dark to see what's inside, and then the thing inside lights up and chimes.

"OH! FUCK NO!!!" Dani screams and covers her face with both hands.

Chan turns to the side to look at you and you look as devastated as Dani, "You got to be kidding me!" You mutter under your breath.

He looks around and it seems like he's the only one who doesn't get a grasp of what's truly happening. He looks at the cone inside the box again and confusingly asks, "Is that... a speaker?"

You shake your head and whine, "No... It's Lana!"

Lana who? And why is everyone looking either mad or devastated? Would it be embarrassing if he told everyone that he doesn't watch TV or streaming movies like most people?

"Hello and welcome to the retreat!" The cone speaks which Chan has just learned is named Lana.

"You have been specially selected because you are all choosing meaningless sex over genuine relationships," she continues.

Luke gets offended and coughs, "Welp. She's not wrong."

"The purpose of this retreat is to help you gain deeper emotional connections in your personal relationships."

Lola brushes her hair to the back in frustration and groans, "But I don't want that!"

"As always, there are conditions to your stay here. You must abstain from sexual practices for the entirety of your stay."

It takes Chan a minute to process that. On the contract it says that he'll spend a month shooting the show, he does the math in his head and his mouth hangs open.

"Nah, nah, nah," Pierre repeatedly chants in denial.

Lana continues with a list of things everyone can't do in the retreat, "No kissing."

You drop your head on his shoulder at the mention of that and mewl.

"No heavy petting."

Jace drops onto his knees and rests his head on Lola's knee.

"No sex of any kind."

His ears perked and his head snaps in your direction, he gets why you're devastated because now he's just as devastated.

"This also applies to self-gratification."

Jace groans like he's in indescribable pain with his head tilts up looking at the night sky.

"What does that mean?" Jane innocently asks.

"No masturbating," Chan answers to her since everyone else is too busy mourning on their own.

"No–No flicking the beans, you mean?" She asks with eyes widening in horror.

Chan nods in sympathy and he can feel the agony already. He surely can pass a month without having sex but not getting a release from touching his own body, that's the sadistic part of it all.

-

CHRIS: I never... I don't think I can go for weeks without— [drops head] [sighs]

-

"I don't think I can do it," You mutter to him with a painful smile.

Jace is being dramatic once again by saying, "I want to call my mom and tell her to come pick me up."

The tattoos and piercings on his body aren't really reflecting Jace's inner self. It shows an example that a true bad boy doesn't necessarily have to look like it.

Lana cuts off everyone's moans and groans with further announcements.

"As part of your social development, I have allocated a prize of $200,000."

That gets everyone in spirit again and Jace immediately sits back on his seat next to Lola, "Cancel it. No need to call my mom!" He shouts at no one.

With that much money, Chan starts to think of things he can buy with it, some producing kits, a new sofa for his studio, and a recording mic he's been wanting to buy. His train of thought is derailed when Lana continues talking.

"Each time the rules are broken, money will be deducted from the prize fund."

Okay, that's so presumptuous of Chan to think that he'll win that money remembering that he's in a retreat with other horny people. There's no way that the amount of money will stay the same at the end of the retreat.

"Welcome to the retreat!" Lana concludes and leaves with another chime.

-

CHRIS: I met Lana and I understand why everyone is fuming [Laughs]

-

The night takes a hard turn and ends the party for good.

To give the girls time to change because they need more time with the make-up and costumes, the boys are lounging outside by the terrace.

"Oh, there she is!" Iain points at the cone that is now put in every corner of the villa.

Luke leans into the cone and commands, "Lana, go away!"

Chan bursts into laughter and leans back in his seat, "Dude, she's not Siri!"

Pierre is too big to sit on the armrest of the sofa, Chan makes a space for him and tells him to sit there.

"Who's going to sleep with who?"

The three competing guys are looking at each other, it's still unclear which one of them Dani is going to choose.

"Why don't we let them choose?" Jace calmly says that he knows for sure that Lola is going to sleep with him.

And Chan has nothing to worry about because he knows you're going to choose him.

The boys take their pick of bed and Chan chooses the one in the corner next to the big window. He's lying on the bed with hands tucked behind his head, waiting for the girls to come into the bedroom and choose their bed partner.

Alicia comes first and she seems to have made up her mind on the bed next to him which is Pierre's bed.

Chan turns to the side and says, "Nice one, bro!"

Pierre gives him a fistbump as a sign of victory and makes space on the bed for Alicia.

Lola is the next one and it's just what he expected, she jumps onto Jace's bed in which Jace enthusiastically waits with his open arms.

The time he's been waiting for is here, he sees you coming into the bedroom dressed in a cropped white top and shorts.

You're still beautiful to him with a bare face and your hair is down, his heart is beating faster and faster as you make your way to his bed.

Chan takes his hands away from under his head as you climb onto the bed, then pats the space between his legs, "Come here, baby!"

You crawl to him and sit where he asked you to, between his legs with your back resting against his chest. Chan wastes no time to cage you in his big arms, then buries his nose in your neck to drink in your heavenly scent.

His hand accidentally brushes over your breasts and despite that it's accidental, he can see that you're not wearing a bra underneath.

"I usually sleep naked," he shares with you.

You slightly turn your head to the side to meet his eyes, "Me too."

Chan, having not yet processed that he's in a sex retreat is not aware that information will most likely do him no good.

"Are you a good cuddler?" You ask.

He nuzzles his nose into your hair, "Oh, you're in for a treat!"

You comfortably rest your head on his shoulder as he slips his fingers into your hands and intertwines them together, resting them on your stomach afterward.

It suddenly turns quiet when Dani enters the bedroom and Chan is enjoying the drama about to unfold in front of him. He and Pierre exchange glances at each other. Now that Pierre has dropped out of the competition, that leaves Dani with two options left, Luke or Iain.

But it's clear that Dani has come to a decision to share the bed with Luke as she casually gets on his bed, "I'll sleep here," she says.

That leaves Iain with no choice but to sleep with Jane.

"Goodnight everyone!" Jace sweetly says to everyone in the room the second the lights are off.

It's a long day and he's still processing everything that happened but it's all worth it because now, he's sleeping next to you.

Chan puts his hand on your waist and pulls you close until your back meets his chest. He likes how your body molds perfectly into his and you snuggle more against his body, your ass rubbing against his crotch. Intentionally or not, he'll eventually get hard because of you.

You put your hand on his jaw and softly kiss his cheek, "Goodnight!"

He places a long kiss on your cheek in return, "Goodnight!" He says, adding a quick kiss on your shoulder after.

-

CHRIS: I don't even know if I'd be able to sleep next to a hot girl and not do anything. [Shakes head]

-

It's morning but the lights aren't on yet.

Chan makes use of the absence of light by cuddling you under the cover, putting his hand around you, and pressing kisses on your bare shoulder, then down your arm.

He hears you humming then softly rubbing your hand on his forearm.

Chan puts his mouth close to your ear, "You're awake?"

You don't say anything but lowly hum as his hand glides down your thigh and gently squeezes on the flesh. Then you turn your head at him and with eyes still closed, you lowly speak, "Nice."

He quietly laughs because you're slurring your words, "What?" He asks.

You turn your head around to whisper it to him so everyone else can't hear it, "Your morning wood."

Chan completely forgot about it but it's too late to hide it, you're probably been feeling his morning wood poking at your ass cheek for a while now. He takes his hand away from your thigh and rests it on your stomach.

"Now I kind of want to see it," you playfully say with a sly smile.

"Mmh... don't worry, you'll see," he seductively whispers to you.

Thankfully, the lights are on and Chan has time to tame his morning wood before he has to start the day.

The cone perched on the small glass table lights up and chimes, "Good morning, everyone!"

It only reminds Chan of the torment he puts himself in. He chooses to stay lying on his bed while you sit against the headboard of the bed with his hand resting on your thigh.

"A reminder that you're no longer in Lust Island and this is the first day of your retreat. Enjoy!" Lana keeps his morning greeting brief yet painful.

Luke groans with a pillow covering his face, "This is like... a nightmare."

Sure, it's hard to stay sexless for a whole month but to say this a nightmare when he sleeps next to a beautiful girl like you, Chan disagrees.

The day starts with working out at the beach with Pierre and he's doing his last rep of push-ups when Jace joins them. He's picking up a dumbbell and groans even before he picks it up.

"I don't know about you but I couldn't sleep much last night," Jace says.

Pierre laughs at him, "Wait, wait, are you—"

"Nah," Jace instantly denies, "I'm just waiting for someone to break the rule first."

Chan sits on the mat with his body coated in sweat, "I bet my money on Luke."

Pierre and Jace hoots at the same time, then slapping each other's chests, "Oh, yeah, damn!"

"Don't you laugh! You're close on second, Jace!" Chan says to him, almost falling over to the back as he laughs.

The hilarity ensues even after Jace starts lifting his dumbbells while standing, facing the vast blue sea.

"What about you, Aussie boy?" He asks.

Chan shields his eyes from the sun with his hand, "What about me?"

Jace shoots him a sly smirk, "Hey, I know, I see everything."

"Oh, yes, yes, he's all over her," Pierre eggs in just to tease him.

Chan glares at him and points his finger at him, "Watch out. I'm sleeping next to you!"

Pierre holds in his laughter, "I won't tell if you don't tell."

Everyone's curiosity is about to get fulfilled as Lana calls everyone to gather in the cabana. Seeing you for the first time after this morning, looking so stunning in a black bikini.

He sits right next to you at the end of the curved sofa with Lana already sitting right in the center of the wooden table.

"I'm nervous," Lola says, even though Lana hasn't come online yet.

Then comes the melodic chime and everyone gets tensed all at once. Seeing everyone nervous, makes Chan nervous too so he puts his arm around you to comfort him.

"Hello, everyone!" Lana begins.

There are various answers but everyone is half-heartedly replying to her.

"You were brought here to form deeper emotional connections and last night, you were given strict rules to adhere to."

Lana sounds not pleased and Chan wonders if anyone has broken the rules yet. He knows for sure that you and him are not breaking any so he scans to spot any guilty faces.

"Those rules forbid sexual contact of any kind. Regrettably, a few minutes later there was a breach of the rules," Lana informs.

"Ooh..." A few people coo in response.

Chan continues his search for guilty faces, his bet is still on Luke but it could be anyone.

"Does this mean it was last night?" Jane asks, looking the most innocent out of the bunch.

Jace slyly laughs and looks at everyone, "Okay, so, who did it?"

Now Chan is not the only one on the hunt for the guilty ones. Everyone is trying to see what is not visible to the naked eye.

Not long after, the first culprit starts to show herself. Dani is shaking her leg too much and trying not to look everyone in the eyes. The calm on her face gradually falters with each passing second.

"You're smiling," Pierre points out and everyone's attention is turned to her.

Dani can't keep her calm anymore and decides to come clean, "Yeah, it was me."

"Oh, shit!" Jace yells, representing everyone else in the group.

"With whom?" Lola asks.

Dani shakes her head, "I'm not going to name names," she says with a cryptic smile.

Now everyone is wondering who kissed Dani between Luke and Iain, the whole thing turns into a detective game. Who kissed Dani?

"Nope. It's not me," Iain confesses right away and the suspicion is directed at the last person left on the list.

Everyone is only waiting for Luke to admit it and you shift on your seat as immersed in the moment as...

"It was me," you come forward with your hand raised.

It takes him more than a moment to collect himself and convince himself that he heard it right. You have just confessed as the one who kissed Dani last night.

Jace jolts in his seat, "WHAT?"

Pierre leans at Chan and exclaims, "Wow!"

You look at everyone and apologize, "I'm sorry. I don't know... I just didn't think that we'd get caught," you explain.

As you're about to sit back, you turn your head in the direction of Luke, "I'm sorry for being the first to kiss Dani," you specifically apologize to him.

-

CHRIS: She kissed Dani... [Chuckles] I like that shit [pinches the bridge of his nose]

-

"This breach of the rules has cost the group $3,000," Lana announces, reminding everyone that there's prize money to protect.

"The prize fund now stands at $197,000."

Chan is getting more pessimistic that there'll be any money left at the end of the retreat. With everyone knowing that someone has broken the rules, it's only about time that everyone takes their turn to do it.

Personally, Chan doesn't care about the money, he has enough but that doesn't mean he will act selfishly by breaking the rules. The word 'selfish' isn't what he wants to be associated with him.

Also, it's not his money in the first place, it's everyone's money, therefore he can't waste money without thinking of the group.

You squeeze yourself into the small sofa he's sitting in and put your hand around him, "Hi," you softly say with a smile.

He looks at you and puts your leg over his knee, putting his hand on the back of your thigh, "Hi!"

You put your hand on the nape of his neck where the beads of water are dripping from the end of his hair from swimming.

"You look good wet," you tell him.

Chan brushes his hair to the back and looks at you, "You look better wet," he says with a sly grin.

It's hard being this close to you and not kissing you. Chan has to actively tell his brain to not give in to the temptations even though it's sitting right on his lap.

"Are you mad?" You ask.

He reckons you're asking about the kiss you did with Dani, "How can I be mad at that?" he asks back.

You laugh in response, "Yeah?"

He rests his head to look up at you, "That's just so hot," he replies.

You put your other hand around him and look into his eyes, entrapped him in your mesmerizing gaze.

Chan's plan is simple: Try not to act selfishly.

Then you happened. You kissed Dani, the most popular girl in the retreat, and then you openly admitted it to everyone. That only shows you have no problem breaking the rules, and added the fact that you're so attractive to him making a lethal combination that would likely lead Chan to act against his plan.

-

CHRIS: She's not only too hot to handle. I'm afraid, she's also a lot to handle [grins] but in the best way.

-

To make everyone connect emotionally rather than physically, Lana has set up a workshop in the front yard of the villa.

Everyone is paired up for it and he, of course, is your partner, he expects nothing less than it. Except that Iain gets the chance to be with Dani in this workshop.

A sex expert has been invited to lead the workshop, "Today, we're going to learn about restraint," she announces.

She walks to the center and looks at everyone as she speaks, "This workshop is about learning to slow down, there's so much more to intimacy and physical connections aside from sex."

Today's lesson is exploring each other's erogenous zones, to find the parts of our bodies that are sensitive to sexual stimulation. Chan has no idea if it would help him think less about sex because it seems like it's going to do the opposite to him.

There's a selection of equipment to help, there are feathers, roses, whips, and even melted chocolate on a bowl. You take the first turn, laying on your stomach on the thin mattress so he can start his exploration.

To begin, Chan only wants to use his hand to trace the curve of your body, feeling every inch of your skin with his fingertips.

You look over your shoulder as his hand climbs up your spine and stops at the nape of your neck only to drag his knuckle down your back.

"You're so soft," he murmurs as he puts your hair away from covering your neck.

You flash him a sly smile and hum, "Mmh..."

He takes a feather from the basket and begins to touch your body with it, finding the special spots that make you whimper or squirm.

Or giggle, just like you're doing right now as he tickles your ankle with the feather, "Tickles?"

You nod with your teeth faintly biting your lower lip.

"Turn over for me, please?" He says to you.

You obey and lay on your back, propping both elbows against the mattress to see that Chan has picked up a rose now.

Chan starts at the neck this time, softly touching you with the rose. He notices you lowly humming as he glides it down your chest and the petals are making a trail down your front. Yet he keeps dragging down your inner thigh and you lowly moan.

"Tickles?"

"Uh-huh."

He brings it close to your clothed core, "Right here?"

You're looking him in the eyes as you reply, "Yes."

"Self control and restraint. Two essential parts of today's lesson!" The expert reminds everyone not to get overboard with their explorations.

Before he takes his turn, he takes a dollop of chocolate and smears it across your sternum. Slowly, he leans down to lick it off of you with his slick, hot tongue.

He can hear your stifled breath and your chest heaving as he sucks on the skin on your breast. He finishes with a kiss on your neck and a triumphant smile on his face.

-

CHRIS: Looking at her laying there and being so sensitive under my touch oh... [hisses] [exhales]

-

The nervousness gets to him when he lays down on the mattress and puts his hands under his head, surrendering his body because it's time for you to explore now.

You crawl over his body to get the whip from the basket and he guesses, you intentionally pressing on his crotch as you look down on him with the whip in your hand.

"I haven't started but your ears are already getting red," you tell him.

Chan tries to stay calm and closes his eyes for a while to finally come up with a response, "It's the sun."

You laugh at that and begin your exploration by touching his body with the leather whip, without warning, slapping it on his skin.

"How about that?" You lowly ask.

"Not bad," he coyly answers.

You get off his body and lay next to him while the whip is continuing its journey down his body, heading close to his clothed member and again, slapping him on his thigh without warning.

"Harder?" You ask.

But before he can answer, you're slapping on the other thigh, earning a low groan out of him. Without looking, he knows that his ears are getting even redder at this moment.

On his pale skin, you can see the marks you made from whipping him, and decides to switch it to feather. You're looking at him while you're teasing his neck with the feather, he can't lie that his ears are one of his sensitive parts. The hair on his arms stands up as you rub the feather on his ear shell.

"You're so cute," you breathlessly whisper, putting his weakness to your advantage.

He can only look at you and hope that he doesn't fall apart under your touch. You take the bowl of melted chocolate, then sit on his crotch, earning a moan out of him.

You flash him a grin that hints you're up to no good. He watches as you pour the chocolate onto his abs and pick a strawberry, dipping it on the chocolate on his abs before tugging it between your teeth and feeding it to him.

Doing it carefully to not accidentally break the rules, Chan takes a bite of the strawberry without his lips touching yours then you shove the rest of it into your mouth and chew on it.

He assumes that you have done as you sit back on the mattress, you hold his body down with your hand on his chest.

"Nuh-uh! I'm not finished yet," you tell him.

He wonders what else you're trying to do but that's the pleasure of not knowing. He sees you ducking your head onto his stomach to lick the chocolate on his abs.

Your tongue makes a long strip of lick up his abs and another long strip down on the next, you clean the rest in kitten licks, making the best of your time to torture him as his ears are about to explode at how red and hot they are, he lies when he said it's because of the sun.

Chan notices the smear of chocolate on your upper lip, "Come here!" He gestures for you to come close to his face.

You crawl and hover over his body, you stay still as he cleans it for you by licking it. It's not a rule break since it's only his tongue that makes contact with your lips.

"How'd it taste?"

"So, so sweet," he answers.

Sadly, the workshop is over. They know that if they let it on for too long, it's going to turn into one massive orgy.

"Self-control is very difficult but I hope that you can take something out of this workshop and practice it in the retreat," the expert concludes at the end of the workshop.

-

CHRIS: I learned that she's sensitive on her ankle, her neck, her chest, and I... can't wait to touch her all over again [Chuckles]

-

There's a lot of seats on the sofa but you choose to sit on his lap. Not that he minds about it, he just can't trust himself when you're this close, especially dressed in a skin-tight outfit that enhances every curve of your body.

You loop an arm around his neck and the other hand is holding a drink, your eyes are always locked in a gaze with him.

"Do you play any sports?"

"Soccer, bowling... uh, pool?" Chan lists the sports he's been playing recently.

You put your drink away so you can use both hands to feel his shoulder blades, "Which sport got you these broad shoulders?"

Chan takes a small sip of his drink before putting it away, "I believe that's from swimming," he answers.

He puts his hand on your thigh with his thumb mindlessly rubbing on the skin as he talks, "I took part in a few swimming competitions in high school."

"Ooh..." you coo in awe, "So, you're good at swimming."

Chan nonchalantly shrugs, then grins, showing his dimples at you.

"What is your best style?"

"Freestyle, butterfly," he casually answers.

"How about breaststroke?" You ask with a seductive smile.

"I'm the best," he answers even though it's kind of vague if you're still talking about swimming style or a different kind of stroke.

It's hard to keep the conversation casual with you, he can't blame you though. It's impossible not to think about sex when he's with you.

"I want to learn the breaststroke from you," you playfully say with a flirtatious gaze.

"How about a private swimming lesson?" He spontaneously comes up with an idea.

With his recent discovery that the back of your thigh is sensitive, he puts his hand there as he says, "I'm going to teach all kinds of strokes."

-

CHRIS: I just can't keep my head straight when I'm with her. There's just a lot of sexual tension, it's unbearable [sighs]

-

While everyone else is getting ready for bed, you change into a swimsuit and meet him at the swimming pool. You sit on the edge to take off the mic to not risk it getting wet and damage it, then jump into the pool afterward.

It is supposed to be a swimming lesson but Chan pushes you to the wall and cages you between his arms. You don't seem to mind it though but Chan is unaware of the danger he trapped himself in.

"I think there'll be lots of rule breaks tonight," you say.

Chan glides his hand down to your waist and holds you there, "Well, thanks to you!" He pokes fun at you.

You chuckle at that and put your arms around his shoulders, "What about you?"

You put your hand on his pec and hypnotizing eyes that look right into his soul, "Are you going to break rules?"

You lean in close and graze his nose with the tip of your nose, "Are you going to be good or bad tonight, mmh?"

Chan brushes his hair to the back before diving it back into the water and lifts your leg by the back of your thigh to hook it around him.

He brings his face close to your side and lowly whispers, "Is that what you want?"

You tip your head to the other side, enticing him with your exposed neck, "Mmh, yeah..."

The beads of water trickling down the column of your neck make him give in to the temptation and plant a kiss on the skin behind your ear, "You naughty girl!" he says with a laugh.

You put your hands on his chest, "And I know you're just as naughty," you say back while gently pushing him away.

Chan laughs and has you pinned against the wall again, looking at your face glows from the bluish lights of the swimming pool.

He reaches for your face and swipes his thumb across your lips, "I want to kiss you," he says with a hoarse voice.

You giggle and put your hands on each side of his waist, "We can't do that, Chris," you say with an insinuating tone that indicates you're not meant to remind him about the rules.

Your eyes are daring him to cross the line and so he does, he puts his hand under your chin, then leans in to kiss you. The way you eagerly return it, he allows himself to kiss you harder and deeper.

Chan lets out a delightful sigh once he pulls away from the kiss and laughs the moment his eyes meet yours, "That was hot," he comments, dropping his head into the crook of your neck.

He's going against his plan to not act selfishly but at that moment, he doesn't think about the money at all. His eyes are looking at your lips and how they're glistening wet, inviting him to kiss it again.

-

CHRIS: Oh my, Gosh! It's just so hard... it's hard [shakes his head]

-

Chan closes his eyes and tries to reorganize his thoughts, holding you tightly to help him get a grip. He hoists you against his body and you immediately wrap your legs around his waist.

"You're a good kisser," you compliment with both of your hands around his neck.

He tilts his head up to look at you, "You're a good kisser too."

You tangled your hand in the hair on the back of his head, "I kind of want to do it again."

Chan knows that you're not asking for his permission, he also knows that one kiss won't be enough for both of you. The kiss is explosive and thrilling, giving him a newfound kind of rush that he wants to experience all over again.

You kiss him first and Chan becomes the one who eagerly returns the kiss to you, opening his mouth so he can use his tongue in the mix.

"Mmh..." you moan as you put your lips on his, then slowly let go.

You smile as you put your forehead against him and seductively giggle, "You're so bad, you know that?"

It should be him saying that line to you. Whenever he's with you, he feels like has no sense of self-control anymore, all he wants to do is submit to your wishes.

He puts you down and turns around so he can rest his back, pulling you close to hold you from the back. He hopes that not seeing your lips will help him calm down.

It's when he composed himself he realizes the damage he has done to the prize money, "Okay, I feel the guilt now," he pathetically admits.

With his hands wrapped around your waist, you rub his forearm in the water and say, "We could have done more but we didn't, you know?"

"That's true," Chan agrees because yes, he could have done more than just kisses with you. If he were out there, he would have broken a bed or two with you.

Chan is fond of physical affection, both receiving and giving. It's imperative for him when it comes to connecting and bonding with the person he likes.

It's a bummer that he can't freely do that in the retreat but if he's going to break rules, he'll only do it with one person and that is you.

-

CHRIS: I want to be good but she brings out the bad in me so... [shrugs]

-

Chan had barely started his day when Lana gathered everyone in the bedroom.

He enters and sees you already sitting on the bed, he sits on the end to let you hug him from the back, waiting for the cone to light up and chime like she usually does.

"Mmh... so hot!" You gasp as you put your hand across his chest.

"How come you only found out now, mmh?" He jokes.

He knows you're talking about his skin and that's because he was at the beach to swim when Lana called. Also, he knows that it's time for judgment, everyone is going to know about the things he did.

Now that he knows he's about to get exposed, his heart skips a beat as the melodic chime comes from the cone.

"Oh! There she is!" Jane weakly gasps.

Lana hasn't spoken but Chan knows she's not pleased with the news she's about to deliver today.

"I have some disappointing news."

Chan silently swallows air and puts his hands together in front of him. He can see the guilts are coming back and haunting him.

"There has been a breach of the rules."

Everyone coo and all eyes are automatically looking for the guilty faces. Chan can see that he's not the only one breaking the rules, he just can't tell if it's going to make him feel better or worse.

-

CHRIS: I'm on the hot seat right now. Everyone is not going to be pleased.

-

Jace leans forward on the bed and rubs his chin, "I'll be honest with you all," he begins.

Jace and his playful smirk is an easy giveaway, Chan can tell that he broke the rules. Lola is also looking nervous as she keeps picking on her nails.

"I spent some money. I kissed Lola last night," he confesses.

Iain sighs and mutters under his breath, "Oh, man..."

"It was all me," Jace says as he glances at Lola, taking all the blame from her.

"I feel a connection so I guess it was worth it... yeah, I'm sorry, you guys," he concludes.

Pierre nods and seems to give him a pass, "Okay."

That seems easy to do and since everyone is on the same ship, Chan reckons that they'll respect his honesty and understand why he did what he did.

It's best to own up to his mistakes quickly than mulling over it so he confesses, "We kissed by the pool last night."

You hide behind his shoulder with your hand resting on the other shoulder.

"Just once?" Jane asks.

Chan looks at you and you take your turn to speak for both of you, "Twice."

"Oh... fuck..." Pierre lowly curses on the bed next to him.

"Is that it?" Iain asks.

He wants to be honest but it's hard when everyone is throwing daggers with their eyes at him. He forces himself to admit it, "I kissed her again. On the bed."

Chan felt guilty on the first kiss but after the second kiss, it got easier for him to rulebreak. As he was spooning you last night, your body was pressed against him and you smelled so good, it just felt right to give you a long, passionate goodnight kiss.

That, he admits is a hundred percent his fault.

"And that's it. No more kisses," you assure everyone before they can yell at him again.

"We're sorry," you end with an apology.

Chan feels grateful that you don't leave him alone, you firmly stand your ground and face it with him.

"That was a waste of money," Iain mutters loud enough for everyone to hear.

You take a sharp breath and ask, "Is that all Lana?"

"There was another breach of the rules," Lana informs, sounding so fed up already.

The drama continues as the next rulebreaker comes to light and that is Luke. It’s kind of expected, he's with Dani after all, and committed two rulebreaks. Pierre comes forward with one kiss with Alicia.

Chan is just so relieved that they take the attention away with them and he can breathe now with the glares no longer aimed in his direction.

"All of these rule breaks have made me reassess my retreat strategy," Lana states.

"Oh... she's mad," Lola says with a panicked smile.

"I have now decided to implement a stricter regime. The fines will now be doubled starting from these rule breaks," she informs.

Chan turns his head to look at you and sees you cringe at the shocking announcement.

"These multiple rule breaks have cost the group $42,000."

Lola gasps with her hand flies to cover her mouth, "We might as well pack up our bags right now," she says.

You both have just now realized the damages done to the prize money. You nuzzle your head into his neck, feeling bad from the guilt.

"The prize fund now stands at $155,000," Lana updates.

-

CHRIS: The bill turned up and we're like whoa! [Eyes widen] I guess yeah... we spent quite a lot.

-

Now it's the perfect time for him to swim at the beach.

Chan needs to cool his head down and let the seawater wash away his guilt of spending that much money on three kisses, he can do so much with $18,000.

He's swimming far off the shore and when he walks back to the villa, Jace is laughing at him.

"I thought you were swimming back to Australia, dude!" He says him while brushing his long blond hair to the back.

Chan doesn't see that Luke is there too until he arrives at the top of the stairs, "I thought about it, yeah," he playfully responds to him.

Chan then sits on the lounger next to him and dries his hair with a towel. He leans back on the lounger and turns his head at him, "I was right that you'll be the second to break the rules!"

Jace snickers, "Damn right, I am. It was worth it."

Luke rubs his oiled body and says, "Yo, I was the one in the hot seat."

Chan laughs at him, "And I thank you for taking everyone's attention away."

"You owe me!" Luke says.

Jace points at Chan with his head lolling to the side, "You know what? I think you'll need a loan soon," he jokes.

Chan shakes his head and that sounds plausible with how much money he spent in one night. As much as he doesn't want to admit it, he hisses in response, "Nah..."

Truthfully, that would be a lie. Chan has not yet found a way to try to stick with the plan but at the same time, he wants to always be close to you but it's dangerous once he gets close to you.

Chan needs to work on his self-control and for a start, he needs to put a safe space between you and him.

-

CHRIS: You know what? I'll not break any rules from now on... [uneasily glances side to side] Hopefully.

-

First thing in the morning, Chan gets handed a hard task when he steps into the bathroom.

"Baby, please, help me!" You sweetly say with a tube of sunblock in your hand.

Chan has no other option but to comply and think of it as a test of self-control. He takes the sunblock from you as you slightly bend down with your hands on the edge of the sink.

"Get in there! Don't be shy!" You playfully tell him as he hesitates to rub over some sunblock on your ass cheeks.

"Okay, okay," he replies, rubbing the cream on the ample flesh of your rear, and not going to lie, he likes what he's touching.

Chan notices that you're looking at him through the reflection in the mirror and he senses that you know what's been happening the last few days.

"You say you're a good cuddler..." you say.

He rubs the rest of the sunblock down your arms, "I am," he assures.

You look over your shoulder at him, "But you barely cuddled me last night," you say with a pout.

His heart flips seeing you adorably complaining about the lack of cuddles and he can't help but smile. He knows he shouldn't put a space all of a sudden and not tell you about it.

Chan pulls your body close against his body and looks at the reflection of him hugging you from the back, fuck, he likes what he's seeing.

He slides his hands down to your hips and pulls you closer, close enough to press on his crotch, "You always make me hard," he confesses.

He presses a long kiss on your neck then says, "That's why."

You're chuckling at his honest answer then turn around to face him, putting your hands on his magnificent abs.

"How about I return the favor?" You suddenly ask.

Chan's eyes widen in shock and he wonders if the favor you mentioned has got to do with the thing he said earlier.

You burst into laughter and take the tube of sunblock, "I mean, putting on sunblock," you make the context clear.

You gently pat his cheek and kiss it while still laughing, "What are you thinking, mmh?"

-

CHRIS: Told you, I just can't think straight when I'm with her.

-

With their eyebrows raised and not-so-subtle death glares thrown your way, it's obvious that they think the reason why Lana called everyone to the cabana is because you both broke the rules again.

"Nah. Nuh-uh. Not us!" You quickly deny everyone's allegations.

Chan can relax this time knowing that he didn't do any rulebreak and puts his arm around your shoulder. You offer your hand to intertwine it with his.

"Hello, everyone!" Lana greets not long after the cone chimes in.

Lola is nervously laughing in response and Jace follows suit, they make a strange couple out of the bunch which only makes them inexplicably cute.

"To help you achieve personal growth during your stay, I need to increase your chance of finding meaningful romantic relationships," Lana remarks.

You turn your head at Chan and raise an eyebrow, wondering if he has any clue as to what Lana is hinting at.

"Therefore, I have invited two new guests to the retreat."

The gasp you let out is loud and sharp, Chan gets a little alarmed at how enthusiastic you get from this announcement. Should he be worried though?

"My guests have selected one person each to take on a date," Lana further informs.

"Oh, my God!" Alicia shrieks.

It shouldn't worry him this much but Chan feels a little worried. It's not him, it's you, he worries that your head will turn.

"The ones chosen for the dates are..."

-

CHRIS: Lana, can you just send us on a date instead? [Laughs] I'll not be pleased if she gets chosen for the date.

-

Chan doesn't want to show it but he starts tapping his fingers on his knee, waiting for Lana to inform who got chosen to get on dates with the new guests.

"Alicia..." Lana announces the first name.

Pierre hisses at the mention of his partner and coyly smiles, looking calm about it.

"And Chris," Lana announces.

Chan only registered a minute later that Lana called his name and that he got picked for the date. He might have secretly prayed for your name to not get called and forgot to pray for his own.

"Alicia and Chris, you may now leave and get ready for your dates," Lana orders.

You thinly smile at him and kiss him on the cheek, "Have fun!"

He's not sure if you mean it or not, but Chan takes it that you have good intentions behind those words. He briefly hugs you before leaving.

-

CHRIS: I did not expect to get chosen but yeah, I think it's a good chance for me to show her that I'm into her.

-

It's when he's getting ready in the dressing room that Lana delivers additional information.

One, they haven't told the new guests that they are on Too Hot To Handle which will make them as horny and as eager as he is at the start of the retreat.

Two, Chan is free to decide at which point to tell them about it.

"It's better if we tell them right away then," Chan talks to Alicia as they're walking down to the beach.

"But then they won't try to kiss you," Alicia cheekily says which is the opposite of what they should do to resist temptations.

"Good luck!" Chan gives Alicia a quick hug as they go separate ways at the beach.

He keeps walking until he finds the place where they have prepared a picnic for the date and also where the new guest has been waiting for him.

The girl turns her head around and smiles when she sees him coming her way, "Hi, hi!"

Chan joins her by sitting on the pillow on the picnic mat, "Hi, I'm Chris," he introduces and offers his hand for a handshake.

"I'm Olivia," she introduces back but instead of shaking his hand, she puts her hand around his shoulder and pulls him for a hug.

It gets him nervous and it's not the first time he goes on a date like this. He grabs the glass of drink that has been prepared for him and initiates a toast with her.

"Is that an Australian accent that I hear?" She asks.

"Yes," He answers.

"Oh, I like that," she sweetly says with a bright smile.

This is the real temptation. Olivia has a voluptuous body, gorgeous strawberry-blond hair, and a nice smile. Chan was so wrong to think that her date would be ugly.

"I've never been to a date this nice, honestly," Olivia says.

Chan swallows his drink before answering, "Well, thank you for choosing me so I can enjoy this nice date with you," he says.

He doesn't mean to sound this flirty, it just sort of comes out of him naturally. It's just the way he talks to a girl.

"Well, you have a great body, sexy lips and dimples. I think it's a no-brainer," Olivia says with eyes that silently travel down his body.

This is what he doesn't get from you enough from you, affirmations and now that he got it from someone, he gets flustered, "Thank you," he mutters with a shy smile.

Olivia flips her hair to one side of her shoulder and gazes at him, "What do you think about me? Am I your type?"

Chan lets out a low laugh and holds his drink in one hand, "You're obviously good-looking," he begins.

Olivia is biting on her finger and locked in a gaze with him as he continues talking.

"I like your smile. It's uh... you have a very nice smile," he sincerely compliments.

"Thank you," she mutters her gratitude with a flirtatious smile.

-

CHRIS: Just because I'm already with someone that doesn't mean I can't get to know Olivia.

-

The plan is to break the news to Olivia as soon as possible.

However, Chan keeps finding himself stalling to do it. He gets immersed in the conversation with Olivia and maybe because he hasn't met new people in a while that makes him inexplicably excited to talk to someone new.

Chan finishes his drink to muster up the courage to drop the news but it's hard when Olivia is constantly giving him the eyes.

"It's a nice date, yeah?" Chan begins by softening the moment.

Olivia smiles and nods, "It would be nicer if we kissed," she shamelessly says.

Oh, Olivia is a trouble and Chan already has a handful of it, she's probably waiting for him to come back from this date as they speak.

"I don't think that's going to happen," Chan says.

"Why?" Olivia's smile falters a little and maybe, she's feeling a little dejected by how quickly Chan shot her down.

"This is not what you think it is," Chan carefully says.

One of her eyebrows shoots up higher than the other, "What do you mean?"

Chan takes a deep breath even though Olivia who should be the one doing it, "You're on Too Hot To Handle."

Olivia sits up straighter and clutches at her chest, "What?"

He feels bad to rain on her parade but he's merely there to be the bearer of bad news.

"That means no kissing, no heavy petting, no masturbating, no sex..."

Her eyes get wider and wider the more she hears about things she's not allowed to do in the retreat, "That means no fun? Ever?"

"Basically... yeah," Chan playfully responds.

Oh, is this how he looked when Lana dropped the news on him? The only thing he knows for sure is Olivia is as livid as he was back then.

-

CHRIS: What can I do? Lana is the one in control here.

-

The night gets dark in time to return to the villa.

Chan helps Olivia climb the stairs on her heeled sandals and proceeds to introduce her to everyone. He gets a little nervous when it comes to introducing Olivia to you.

"So, how was the date?" Lola asks.

Chan scratches the back of his head and answers, "We had a good time."

"Yeah, that was... the nicest date I ever had," Olivia adds.

He takes a seat next to you on the sofa and you're only looking at him without saying anything.

"Did you have fun?" You finally ask him.

Chan leans into your side and says, "Let's have a talk!"

Taking you by the hand, he pulls you aside to get some privacy. You choose to sit on the sofa across from him rather than next to him.

"Uh... Olivia is sweet and we had a great chat," Chan begins while rubbing down his arm.

"I used the chance to get to know her," he adds.

He sees you subtly rolling your eyes at him and sigh, pretending like you don't care but he knows. It's kind of cute that you're worrying him that Chan's heart is fluttering inside.

He reaches for your hands and intertwines his fingers with you, "But the whole time, during the date..."

He looks at you and smiles, "I just couldn't wait to get back."

A smile rises on your face and he can see that you soften around him. He uses his index fingers to draw endless circles on the inside of your palm.

"I miss you," he softly mutters.

You're shyly smiling at him and say it back, "I miss you too."

"Come here! Give me a hug!" He says while shaking your hand.

You get up from the sofa and walk up to him, he stops you before coming for his lap.

"Oh, looking so hot tonight," he comments on the way you dressed tonight in a black silk dress with a high slit on the side.

"Spin for me, baby," he requests.

You take your hand away so you can do it for him, spinning on your feet. You show off your dress and make a few poses for him, doing it so confidently that it's undeniably sexy to him.

"Mmh... yeah, the finest girl in the retreat!" He praises.

You're laughing looking at his exaggerated facial expression, then melt onto his lap, letting him hold you tightly. Chan kisses the top of your head and whispers, "You're my number one."

After all, the word 'loyal' is what he likes to be associated with.

-

CHRIS: I don't think there's anybody else that could walk in here and turn my head at all. She's the one.

-

With his open arms, Chan is ready to catch you as you jump onto the bed at him. He locks his arms around you, then peppers your shoulder and neck with little kisses.

"Good job, Chris!" Alicia beams from the next bed.

He sees that she's still sharing the bed with Pierre, and he says back to her, "Good job, Alicia!"

The date was certainly a test but it's not much about temptations, it made Chan realize how much he likes you and he doesn't want to be with anyone else in this retreat but with you.

As he looks at you while you're lying next to him, he wonders if you feel the same too. He softly brushes your hair to the side and gently kisses your cheek, "Goodnight, baby!"

The lights are out and you snuggle into him, hooking your leg around him with your foot rubbing his shin. You place a long kiss on his neck before lowly whispering to him, "I'm glad you're back."

Chan quietly smiles in the dark of the room, "With you," he continues the sentence for you.

"With you," you repeated his words instead of putting it into a whole sentence.

He turns his head and he can easily land a kiss on your forehead, "Me too."

It's getting suspicious that your hand that was resting on his chest is slowly going lower and lower. You're probably waiting until everyone else is fast asleep to do something.

You nuzzle your head further into his neck to kiss him there, your hand is inching closer to the waistband of his boxer.

"Mmh..." he warns you with a hard squeeze on your waist.

You bring your mouth close to his ear and playfully bite on his ear shell, ignoring his warning by slipping your hand into his boxer.

Chan can stop you by putting your hand away but he knows you want to make him feel good and he simply can't resist you.

"Oh, you're so bad," he says it so low it's almost like a whisper.

He closes his eyes the moment your hand meets his semi-hard cock, "You're so bad," he says again but does nothing to stop you.

"I know," you reply to him, wrapping your hand around his length and slowly stroking it.

Chan draws you closer to his side with his hand fisting the back of your camisole as he begins enjoying the stimulation you're giving him.

"Impressive," you seductively sigh into his ear after exploring every inch of his hardening cock.

One compliment is enough to make him extremely aroused. He feels your thumb circling the tip of his cock before pumping it up and down with your hand at a steady pace.

Chan holds it in as long as he could but after days passed without getting a release, his self-control hits the lowest peak and he cums only after a few minutes.

"That wasn't even my good hand," you whisper with a low giggle.

He turns to look at you and jokingly says, "What good hands, mmh? You don't have any."

Chan knows he's a few minutes late to pull your hand out of his boxer, he then playfully bites at your fingers, "They're all bad hands. Bad, naughty hands!"

As you lowly laugh at his reply, he presses a kiss on your open mouth and draws you closer to him, feeling your body molds into his again.

-

CHRIS: [Bites lip] I can only hope that we didn't get caught.

-

"Morning," Chan croaks with a soft kiss on your cheek.

You get up right away a moment after the lights are turned on, sitting with your back against the headboard then ties your hair into a messy bun.

Still gathering his senses, Chan decides to rest his head on your lap and put your hand in his hair so you can play with it.

You give his curls a ruffle and brush it with your fingers, "Is this your natural hair?"

What you're doing is comforting him so that he can only hum in response, "Mmh."

He turns his head to the side and sees you looking down at him, "Do you like it?"

You tenderly cup his cheek in your hand, "Mmh. I like it."

Chan takes your hand to kiss the inside of your hand and wrist, his heart skips a beat at the melodic chime that comes from the cone.

Thankfully, it's Lana with her usual morning greeting and wishing the new guests a good day on their first day in the retreat. Chan thought that the first day was the hardest, but now he learned that he lost a bit of his self-control on each day spent in this retreat. What happened last night is the proof of it.

"How was your sleep, Nick, Olivia?" Lola asks the new guests who shared the bed.

"To be honest, I'm hoping it was all just a dream," Nick answers.

Everyone painfully laughs at the satire. Chan honestly still wishes that it was only just a dream but instead of that, he got used to the cameras recording everything he does in the retreat.

"Is there anyone you like here?" Luke asks either Olivia or Nick.

Chan doesn't need to worry about Olivia anymore. Guess, she has seen that he's with you which automatically makes her stop pursuing him. It's the other guest that he worries about, he notices that he's been secretly stealing glances at you.

"Mmh..." you moan as you hug him tight before getting up from the bed to start the day.

-

CHRIS: She worried for me last night but that's not quite convinced me if she feels the same way. I'm a little worried that her head will turn.

-

His fear turns real when Chan gets back to the villa from swimming and finds you chatting with the new guy in the bathroom.

Chan lingers at the doorway to catch glimpses of the conversation, catching him compliments you and you're laughing at him.

"I think there's something between us," Nick says.

"You think?"

Nick laughs and says, "I just can tell."

You're only softly laughing and not denying it. Chan decides that it's time to enter the scene so he walks into the bathroom not saying anything but gets himself a towel from the rack.

Chan turns around and looks at you, slightly nodding at Nick. The uncomfortable forcing Nick to leave the bathroom which is the only right decision there is.

You're slyly smiling at him as you lean against the sink, "Hey..."

Chan doesn't answer but keeps drying his body with the towel. He wants to see what you're going to do with this suffocating silence.

You come up to him and slip your hands under his arm, hugging him, looking up at him with your puppy eyes. You try to get his attention by kissing his neck and placing a wet kiss on his collarbone.

"Mmh... salty," you say with a giggle.

Without warning, he hoists you up and carries you on his shoulder. He slaps on the back of your thigh while looking at you through the reflection in the mirror.

"Bad girl!" He slaps you again on the other thigh, sending you squealing and laughing with your head hung upside down behind him, "You bad, bad girl!"

He slaps your ass cheek this time and asks you again, "Funny, huh?"

Yet you keep laughing, only grabbing at his arm for support. Chan turns his head to bite on the flesh of your ass cheek, "Is it still funny?" He asks again.

"Uh-huh!" You cheekily answer.

-

CHRIS: She's really bad... I need to tame her. Wish me luck though [Grins]

-

Lana throws a welcome party for the new guests and everyone is wearing red for the theme.

Chan wears a sleeveless top with his dark slacks while you're dressed in a red dress with a low neckline that barely covers your breasts.

However, the party can't stop the imminent threat of Lana telling everyone about the things you both did last night. Chan can only mentally prepare himself for it and gulps his drink in silence.

"So, what do DJs actually do?" You suddenly ask him, sitting on his lap like always.

Chan remembers he once mentioned his job as a music producer but you only focused on his side job as a DJ, "Huh?" He asks in confusion since you asked out of the blue.

You put your drink away and put your hand on his shoulder, "You guys made the mix beforehand, right? So when you're on the stage, you know DJing, you just need to play that mix," you concisely put what a DJ does as if it sounded that simple.

Chan can tell you everything there is about DJing that is more complex than what you've just said but he can only laugh at it and it helps him to take his mind off things, "Yeah, kind of."

You squeeze his shoulder and say, "If that's the case then I want to be a DJ too."

He rubs his hand down your spine and rests it on the arch of your back, "You can be whatever you want."

"Mmh," you hum as you sip your drink, "We can make a duo, you and me, DJing together."

Chan is having a good laugh about it when the music abruptly stops playing then the familiar chime comes in through the speakers.

"Please could everyone gather in the cabana immediately!"

-

CHRIS: Oh, fuck, I'm shitting it.

-

You're looking so calm sitting next to him, unaware of what's going to happen once the cone starts talking. Chan tries to put on a cool face as well, leaning back on his seat with his hand resting on your thigh.

"I've gathered you all to remind you that this retreat is for finding deeper connections, not just physical ones," Lana speaks.

The long pause between the lines is making Chan even more nervous, his hand is getting sweaty yet you hold it tightly on your lap.

"This information is not getting through to some guests. There has been a breach of the rules," Lana announces.

Alicia smacks her lips together and asks, "Who was it?"

The hunt for guilty faces is on and of course, everyone is looking at them. Chan is planning to admit it real quick, ripping the band-aid all at once but someone gets ahead of him.

"A while ago..." Iain says, "Literally a few minutes ago, I kissed Olivia."

Lola slaps her forehead and sighs, "Oh, my God!"

Olivia only shrugs in response, not showing any remorse or guilt on her part.

"The kiss has cost the group $6,000," Lana informs.

"Nice!" Lola adds a snide comment.

Everyone is pissed because Olivia spent some money when she has only been here for less than two days. Chan gets the picture of how things would be when he comes forward.

"Oh, I need another drink," Luke says.

"That is not all!" Lana makes everyone hold their breath once more.

-

CHRIS: Okay, here we go... [sighs]

-

"Last night, there was another breach of the rules."

There's no way out of it, everyone is going to know whether he decides to tell or not. Chan takes a deep breath and another one and...

"It was me," you confess.

"Oh, shit..." Pierre drags the curse word and leers at Chan.

Lola looks at you and asks, "What did you do this time, babe?"

You glance at Chan before looking back at everyone, "There was a kiss and..."

You lick your lips and hold on to his hand on your thigh, "I gave him a handy."

"Oh, for fuck's sake!" Jace exclaims, then bursts into laughter.

"We may as well go home. We have no money left!" Jane says with a dramatic sigh.

"I wanted to show Chris what he's been missing for going on that date, so... I'm sorry," you conclude with an apology.

It's not a good time to get lovey-dovey but he is swooning. You're fearlessly owning up to your mistakes and openly explaining the reason why you did it.

You may bring out the bad in him but he can see that there's a genuine connection there. He doesn't want to sit there and watch as everyone is attacking you.

"We're sorry, okay?" Chan apologizes once again on behalf of you.

Thankfully, Lana takes over the situation.

"What you did goes against the purpose of the retreat. Therefore a further $14,000 has been deducted from the prize fund," Lana comes up with the calculated damage.

Lola is groaning and squirming like someone has set her body on fire, "Oh, God!"

"The prize fund now stands at $135,000."

Chan grips your hand hearing how much money have lost from the initial amount and have a hard time reeling from it.

As if that wasn't enough of torture, Lana calls your name and his.

"You have broken most rules since arriving at the retreat. You must now prove that your connection is more than just purely physical."

You're looking at him and he sees panic in your eyes, kind of figuring out what Lana is going with it.

"You will face the ultimate test of chastity by spending the night alone in the private suite."

Chan gulps air and feels hot all of a sudden. Without looking, he can feel everyone's eyes are drilling holes in his head.

-

CHRIS: I want to prove to everyone that we do have a genuine connection but at the same time, we're going to the private suite... [whistles] it's going to be hard.

-

Everyone is emitting negative energy and that only makes Chan can't stand another second being in the same room with them.

"Please make your way to the suite!" Lana commands.

Chan shoots up from the sofa and offers his hand to help you get up, "Come on, babe!"

He just can't wait to get away from everyone and not be around them. He leads the way to the private suite that is located in a different part of the villa.

Chan slowly pushes the door to the suite and the smell of scented candles welcomes him. He holds the door open for you and you gasp at the sight of the big bed with a  silk sheet on it.

"Oh, they want us to fail, babe," you say as you slowly lay yourself down on the bed.

Chan stands at the end of the bed and looks at you, lying with rose petals scattered around you.

"So beautiful," he murmurs.

He puts his knee against the mattress to hover above you, taking his time to admire your beautiful face with admiration in his eyes, "Stop looking so beautiful!" He says in a frustrated tone.

You smile at him and draw his body closer, sending him toppled on top of you.

"So, tell me..." you lowly speak with your hand going under his top.

"Tell you what?" He says as he plants a soft kiss on your neck.

"What are we doing tonight, Chris?" You ask.

You rarely call him by his name but when you do, it does things to him. He has so many things he wants to do to you but sadly, they are all against the rules.

-

CHRIS: Lana wasn't kidding when she said it's the ultimate test... [shakes head] [sighs]

-

The bath is ready and Chan is leaning against the sink, watching you taking every piece of clothing off you.

You look confident in your body and that's just a whole different level of sexy to him. You're smiling, noticing that he's been ogling at your body, up and down, for so many times he lost count of it.

"Why are you just standing there?" You ask while twisting your hair and securing it with a hair claw.

He shakes his head with his cheeks blushed from how horny he is, "You're so gorgeous," he praises.

You come up to him and kiss him on the cheek, close enough to the corner of his mouth, "Don't make me wait."

You get in the tub first and slowly lower yourself into the warm, scented water to not slosh it out of the tub.

You fill two champagne flutes with the bubbly wine while Chan is removing his clothes in under a minute. You look at him as he stands there in all his glory. He notices the glance you made at his semi-hard cock.

"You like what you see?" He asks.

You pull your feet up so he can take the spot on the other end of the tub and then you can rest your feet on his legs.

"Oh, I want to get a taste now," you tell him with a flirty wink.

Chan bursts into laughter to mask how nervous he is inside. He's snaking his hand under your thigh to hold you there.

"You're hard right now," you remark out of nowhere.

It's obvious, he can even see right through the milky water that his cock is fully erected and you're not asking, you know it's true.

"What should we do about it?" He asks.

You sip your wine and lick your lips, "That depends on how much money we want to spend tonight," you tell him.

Oh fuck, it's going to be one hell of a night!

-

CHRIS: [Sighs] Uh... I think I need a loan statement.

-

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[locketsvault]

「 CUDDLING WITH TOKYO GHOUL MEN 」

pairings: jūzō suzuya x reader ፥ ayato kirishima x reader ፥ renji yomo x reader

tags: gender neutral reader, no agab mentioned, first person, fluff, cuddling/phyiscal affection

warnings: angst in ayatos, mention of parents dying in ayatos, cursing in yomos

request: Heyy, can i please ask for cuddling headcannons with tokyo ghoul guys? (Juuzou, Ayato and Yomo) (request found here.)

a/n: I’m so happy to write for jūzō I love him sm. this request was very fun to do! I do warn later on, but I’m not too familiar with yomo though I did do my best! if you have any comments or ideas about cuddling these silly men, feel free to comment or send something through my inbox. I take anons too!

// jūzō suzuya⌇˚.༄

⮑ You’ve managed to get him to sit still long enough to cuddle? I’m impressed.

⮑ No really, he’s hard to cuddle because of how much energy he has, not to mention the fact he always wants to be out and about. Funnily enough, not to lean into the stereotype but I 100% see him being docile if you give him sweets and snacks lmao. As long as you feed him he will remain in your arms like a good boy.

⮑ That brings me to my next point actually, he’s mostly always a little spoon. On rare occasions he’ll be big spoon, but the problem is that he doesn’t… know how. He doesn’t know how to be big spoon, he doesn’t know how to be the one comforting physically. But he tries!!! And tbh he’s pretty good with it, even if he can be slightly awkward at first. He learns, especially if you willingly help him.

⮑ I think because of his personality and upbringing, most people assume he doesn’t understand affection. While I can agree, to a certain extent, he isn’t clueless, and it doesn’t mean he doesn’t understand all forms of affection. He does, and he learns well. Even if his ways of showing affection are not traditional lol.

⮑ He does not mind pda, he doesn’t get why people are uncomfortable. He loves you, and if he wants cuddles from you while working or going around the city, then he should get what he wants no? Plus, it’s not like he’s worried about his reputation.

⮑ A solid 8/10 in the cuddle department. if he sits still long enough and is willing, his cuddles are warmth. they’re home.

// ayato kirishima⌇˚.༄

⮑ He must really trust you if he’s cuddling with you willingly.

⮑ Hear me out okay. I know he’s not only the whole “bad boy” persona we all see. But it is a big part of him and how he thinks. Affection is weakness, and showing weakness is asking for death. Especially in the earlier days. The idea of being vulnerable even in the safety of his own home freaks him out.

⮑ I think for the longest time he wouldn’t entertain the idea. That is until he’s had a rough day, and suddenly he finds himself burying his face in your torso, holding you between his legs. You can’t move, you’re not allowed to. Not that you’d want to; because finally subjecting himself to affection has caused him to break down. Yep, your first time cuddling involves a very vulnerable and probably crying boy in your arms. He’s back to the age of his parents still being alive in that moment.

⮑ But! Once he’s finally given himself the taste of affection, especially from you, he can’t let it go. It’s still only in private though, he can’t bring himself to feel comfortable cuddling you in front of others. Honestly it’s probably not until after :re that he feels comfortable with pda.

⮑ His cuddles are rigid at first, he can’t get himself to relax. But over time he softens up. He loves cuddling you face to face, he loves admiring you. You may even find his eyes soft and adoring. His body runs extra hot so he’s perfect to sleep with in the winter. Oh, couch cuddles that consist of you being a personal weighted blanket are also always welcome.

⮑ I’ll give him a 6.5, he’s still figuring himself out but somehow his cuddles are still nice.

// renji yomo⌇˚.༄

⮑ Honestly he looks like someone who gives wonderful hugs.

⮑ Now you’ll have to forgive me, I don’t really know too much on yomo, though I did try to read up a little to refresh my mind.

⮑ If we’re talking about early days yomo, when he was a little shit (sorry yomo), I don’t really see him as a cuddly person. He’s too hot headed and violent, especially after losing his sister. But if we’re talking about Anteiku and beyond yomo, I could see him appreciating cuddles very much.

⮑ And I mean it too. I think physical affection is one of his main forms of affection right next to act of service. So he’s always down to cuddle you if you ask. You’ll usually have to initiate it though, unless you’re at home. He’ll open his arms for you and pull you close.

⮑ I can vividly picture this man allowing you to lay on his chest and probably fall asleep while reading a book peacefully. And he’s willing to stay that way for hours. It’s probably very soothing to him. Especially if the room is quiet and he can hear your heartbeat.

⮑ When it comes to pda, I don’t really think he’d do it. And if he did he never initiated it. he’s a man of few words, and is reserved. His actions can speak for himself yes, but he doesn’t go out of his way to. He doesn’t care if anyone comments on it though, and is probably both amused and annoyed at the gawking of someone curled into his side at the coffee shop lol.

⮑ 9/10 as well, as long as it isn’t early yomo, you’ve got yourself a wonderful protective cuddler.

main hub ✦ masterlist ✦ to do list

[babyleostuff]

Hey hey :) I absolutely love your writing I can't stop myself from reading and rereading them over and over again!

I don't know if you're taking any requests, but if you are could you write about seventeen being softdoms. Like them being all manly + all soft for their s/o. Masculine without the toxicity lol

If not you can just ignore this ask 🥰

author's note | ah we love us a softdom seventeen 😍 i decided to split it up to sfw and nsfw, hope you don't mind <3

also, my inbox is open again, so if you guys have any requests or asks feel free to write me!

soft dom seventeen | ot13

SFW

The type to spoil the living shit out of you, because you deserve all the best things in the world (one word from you and the next day you’ll get whatever you mentioned). Also, may be a bit overprotective, but it’s just because he doesn’t want you to get hurt. He makes it his life mission to keep you safe at all times, so he will fight anyone who dares to make you uncomfortable. Even when he’s angry or having a fight with someone, the second you enter the room, he’s all like “hi baby ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶”:

➼ Seungcheol, Mingyu, Chan, Wonwoo��

A complete gentleman who will do anything to make you feel like a princess. No matter how bad of a day he’s having, one look from you and he’s all smiley and happy again. His heart eyes are reserved for you and you only and he will not hesitate to use them in his favour. Protective, but not in an overbearing way. He’ll just shoot the stranger one look and they’ll know that it’s better to not make you uncomfortable. Bonus: he gives the softest kisses in the world (they make you melt on the spot):

➼ Joshua, Dokyeom, Jun, Seungkwan, Vernon

He knows how weak you are for him and he will use that to his advantage. A lot. He just loves messing with you and seeing you all flustered because of him (don’t worry, he makes it up with a lot of kisses). He’ll do anything you ask him for - there is nothing more important to him than your happiness. So you can say that he’s weak for you as well??? He’s a certified simp, what can I say. Also buys you flowers out of nowhere and gets you your favourite candy just because he can:

➼ Minghao, Jeonghan, Woozi, Soonyoung

NSFW

Will be destroying you with his cock, while telling you how pretty you look. One second, the most sinful words are escaping his mouth, mocking you how weak of a slut you are for him and the second he’s giving you gentle kisses on your neck, soothing his previous made hickies. BUT, turns into a completely different person when he’s finally satisfied with how many times he’d made you cum. The aftercare is top tier and he turns into the softest and gentlest being:

➼ Seungcheol, Mingyu, Chan, Wonwoo, Woozi

Treats you like you are made of porcelain, while still fucking you nice and deep, hitting all of the right places. Most likely will make you come with his mouth or fingers a couple of times, before he slams his cock into you, making you see stars. Repeats how pretty you are and how good of a job you’re doing, while sucking your nipples and circling your clit with his thumb. He swears he lives for your moans and the way you push your hips against his face when he’s eating you out:

➼ Joshua, Dokyeom, Seungkwan, Jun

Teases the shit out of you, before he even pulls out his dick from his briefs (which at this point you’re practically begging him to fuck you). Will make you say exactly what you want him to do to you, every single sinful thought that you’re having or else he’s just going to leave you hot and horny. But, when he’s satisfied with how wet and needy you are, he’s ramming his cock into you in no time. The touch of his fingertips is feather like, his lips slowly outlining the shape of your body, while his cock is fucking you dumb:

➼ Soonyoung, Vernon, Minghao, Jeonghan

taglist (if you want to be added, check my masterlist): @weird-bookworm

[hanilessa]

» :、♡  YOUR ATTENTION

` Summary: You pay a lot of attention to your newborn child, and your husband has only to watch it jealousy. He lacks your attention.

` Includes: Childe, Zhongli, Heizou x fem!reader

` Genre: fluff, romance, hints of jealousy

` Author’s notes: likes, replies and reblogs are greatly appreciated <3 my inbox is open for your requests! feel free to text me if you want to request headcanons or drabble. :3

part two! part three!

CHILDE

When you have your first child, Childe is over the moon. He will constantly be next to you and your child in the first months of his life, not wanting to miss any of the days of his son's life.

He's a wonderful father, you can tell for sure when you see how gentle and caring he's with his child.

But everything changes when he really realizes that caring for a child isn't an easy task. He notices this when he comes home from work hoping you will hug and kiss him, warming him in your arms, but no. You hug your son, not Tartaglia.

The child narrows his eyes in a funny way and reaches out to the man with his small hands, and Ajax thinks that for the first time your lack of attention can go unnoticed.

But when this is repeated again, Childe is no longer in the mood for jokes.

He literally acts like he's a child here (you could say that's the best pun).

Initially, you didn't notice his sidelong glances in your direction when you held your son in your arms, but when your husband shamelessly took your child in his arms, put him in the cradle, and with the most upset face, he sits you on his lap, burying himself in your chest, you understood that something happened to him.

"Ajax, do you want to tell me anything?" You ask.

"No, let's just sit like this for five minutes." His voice sounds pleading, and you think that he's slightly sobbing.

He will pout and make faces, because this is his way of showing you that he's upset or unhappy. Please don't make fun of him, he just wants your attention.

At this time, he's very clingy, so it isn't possible for you to get out of Tartaglia's arms. You just need to relax and give the man some of your caress, which he missed so much.

Be sure to give him lots of kisses, because you have to give him as much love as you gave your child during these months.

Tartaglia will whine and cling to you every time you want to make sure that everything is in order with your child. Because right now your attention should be on him. And only for him.

Childe wants to receive your love and affection too.

He loves your son very much, never doubt it. But please, don't forget to give love and kisses to him too, because for him it was, is and will be the most important thing in his life.

ZHONGLI

Zhongli always kept calm, prudence and sobriety of mind. Except when your daughter was born. It was one of the few times you saw him cry.

Sometimes you remember this moment, cradling your daughter in your arms at bedtime, watching Morax work. You prefer not to interfere with him, taking care of your daughter on your own and not wanting to disturb the man, because he had a lot of work.

Gradually Zhongli began to notice that you were somewhat distant from him when he looked at you in the brief moments of rest from work. You paid attention to your baby, completely forgetting about your husband.

Usually after long hours of work, Zhongli prefers to spend time with you, trading stories and sipping hot tea. And after the birth of your daughter, spending time with you became even more important to him.

You were always happy when he had free time. But this time you looked completely at ease and not the first time you paid attention to him when he offered you help in caring for your daughter.

"It's okay, Zhongli." You said as you stroked your daughter's head. "I'm doing great. You can continue your work." And you, completely fascinated by your daughter, left his office.

Yes, Morax was rather surprised now. Work always took up his time, but he always had time after that when he could spend time with you. Previously, he was unavailable to you, but after the birth of your daughter, you became unavailable to him.

You were next to your daughter all the time, never leaving her for a minute, and it seemed to him that he was gradually losing his mind, because he simply didn't have time to be alone with you.

And when Zhongli feels like he can't go another day without your attention, he'll ask Xiao or Ganyu to look after your daughter so that you both can have some alone time.

You two walk along the harbor, Morax holds your hand tightly, as if he is afraid that you will suddenly disappear. And you smile as you ask him, "You look like you want to tell me something."

Zhongli always knows that he is an open book for you, just like you're for him, like clear water in a lake that he can look into. So he laughs, stops and pulls you into his arms.

He is always gentle, even when something excites him. You look into his eyes and he starts to say, "Please, let's stay here for a while. I know that work takes up all my time, but I ask you to give a little of your attention to me too. I go crazy when I see you next to me, but I can't touch you."

"Let me be the one to always help you take care of our baby."

Morax is always so cute when he asks you for something, so please give him a big hug and a promise that you can always give him your love and attention.

HEIZOU

When your son was born, Heizou decided to take a few months off to spend all that time with you and your child.

He often saw that his colleagues helped their wives when they had a child.

And he looked forward with great joy to the moment when he could help you take care of your child, but what he couldn't expect is that you did a great job on your own.

You've always been successful at your job, housekeeping, and helping your husband, and all he wanted to do was help you in return.

But you were passionate about your child and taking care of him that you didn’t even notice that Heizou offered you his help.

He cherishes you and your child, and always wants to be with you.

The man understood that you were passionate about caring and worrying about your newborn child, but he also wanted to help you, he wanted to be important to you and your child.

He also wanted to bathe in your love and affection.

When you refuse his help, he usually reassures you and sits you on his lap, offering to rest for a while. When he lacks your attention, Heizou usually doesn't let you out of his arms under any pretext.

He will do everything to get your attention so that it remains only on him. Tickle, hug and kiss you. Now he wants you not to be distracted from him.

He wants you to rest, and at the same time he wants to spend time with you.

You're always next to your son and almost don't pay attention to your husband, who isn't very happy with this fact. So give Heizou your attention too. He needs it very much.

He holds you in his arms and speaks.

"Please, honey, let's get some rest together. I can see how tired you are. You always do a lot, so just take some rest. And stay with me. That's all I ask."

"Okay."

You nod and sigh because you know that until Heizou is sure that you're rested, he will never let you out of his arms full of love and tenderness.

Therefore, promise him that you will also give him tenderness and love, which he really wants from you.

[lunas-side-anime-blog]

aot veteran/104 corp icks bc im back on my bullshit

someone requested AOT veteran icks, they didn't specify nsfw or not so I did both and also added sasha connie and jean bc i luv them:) feel free to message/inbox with requests!

(levi, erwin, hange, jean, sasha and connie)

Levi

will visit ur place and organize things without you asking. he'd just be like "ur welcome, now your kitchen makes sense" and ur like sir, I don't know where anything is now??? also he'd def the type to proclaim he's better than you for only getting two hours of sleep when you got four. honestly so many icks come to mind for this one, imma limit it to those two for now (stay tuned lol)

nsfw: tries to be rough with you but forgets his own strength. will try to throw you on the bed, but he does it too hard so you completely miss the bed and fall on the other side of it and he's just standing there like "🧍🏻...my bad."

Erwin

you cannot convince me this man doesn't wear water shoes at the pool. you guys say you want a dilf until you actually get one bc this is the type of shit it entails^^

nsfw: erwin cannot dirty talk for shit. im srry but if you're a lil kinky this isn't the man for you. try to call him daddy and he'd be like "we don't have kids?" and you explain the kink to him and he'd just say, "have you considered therapy?🤨" now he's concerned, boner gone, you feel called out, just go to sleep tbh

Hange

they're def a firm believer in natural deodorant and won't take the graceful hints that it's not working. prob wouldn't chill w them on a hot day is all i'm saying

nsfw: feel like they'd be really good in bed tbh like i'm struggling to think of an ick. hange has big dick energy, weirdos just do it better idk. i think maybe hange would try to spit in your mouth (they a freak) and they have so much and its thick and globby like the back of the throat type spit, your gonna choke bro im gagging as a i type-

Jean

bring back toxic masculinity because Jean's hair care routine is so good to the point he'll call out your split ends, i just know it

nsfw: a fucking chatterbox like his homies know everything. you've walked in on him telling connie in extreme detail how he had you in a full nelson last night while you screamed bloody murder and he doesn't see why ur mad. "babe, if anything i'm bragging about you 😏" fucking idiot istg. also kinda gross but I think he's the type to keep sniffing his fingers after fingering you like well into the next day EWW

Sasha

obvi she can't share for shit so I think she'd be an annoying person to eat out with. like yk when you're with your friends and only one person puts their card down so the rest can Venmo them? I think you can ask her to Venmo 20 and she'd send 15 and say something like "oh I didn't eat as many fries" but she fr did. never puts her card down either so believe it or not? jail.

nsfw: will literally be on her phone mid-sex with you. feel like she'd be really into the subway surfer vids and yeah, you go down on her and look up and she brought her own entertainment? ipad child behavior

Connie

i think he'd say "we" when talking about his fave sports team as if he contributed. like, "really connie, you helped win the superbowl? did you score a touchdown?" grow tf up

nsfw: insane bush on this one, i feel like he doesn't groom for shit and whatever, that's your choice! but I also feel like college-aged modern connie would talk shit about women who weren't bald down there and won't eat it unless it is. HYPOCRITE!! I think when he gets to his mid-twenties tho he'd mature (sasha beat his ass)

[mr-urple]

» The devil’s coming but only to worship me_.

Heyo guys, gals, and nonbinary pals! I'm Donatello, but I more commonly go by Don. I'm your average ninja mutant turtle teen with a penchant for violence and chaotic shenanigans. I'm just a silly guy, don't be afraid to hang around! You can slide something into my inbox while you're at it, I won't mind !

OC MASTERPOST (Last updated: July 1st)

SONA REFERENCE SHEET

TMNT:FF TURTLE REFERENCES

PRONOUNS PAGE

400 FOLLOWER DTIYS

THE GANG!!!

#atomic bomb [⚛️🧪] - @atomic-rattz (BEST BRO 🗣🗣🗣)

#Nebula [⭐️♠️]- @splatting-stampede (Nee-chan!!!)

#insufferable twink 🧡 - @rawcherrycake (my beloveth.. <3)

Other moots!

#eepy tello 💤 - @mrsleepytello (annoying star-gremlin /aff)

#cassette tape 📼 - @cin3maa (THE LIL SIS EVER‼️‼️)

#Glitter Gloop [🫐✨] - @heaven-is-a-bedroom (Silly-Billy big bro :3)

EXTRA TAGS

#my art - for my art, duh

#purple.txt [👾] - me when I yap

#swords vs tech - my rivalry with @ceruleanterrapin (he's cool guys I swear)

#villain au - anything related to my villain arc! hehhehehe

#cyan.txt [🧬] - My oc DNA's talking tag (he took over my blog once)

ADDITIONAL INFO UNDER CUT (PLEASE READ)

MY ART REQUESTS ARE CLOSED!!

Please don’t ask if my requests or commissions are open. They aren’t. And I don’t plan to open them any time soon. I’m a self-indulgent artist who draws what he wants, and I’d like to keep it that way.

INTERESTS Feel free to talk to me about these things!

Splatoon and the Splatoon Manga (aka coroika). It's my favorite video game EVER and I am more than ready to gush about it.

Pokemon. I'm not as well versed in the earlier games, but I do know quite a bit of it!

Legend of Zelda. Specifically BoTW, TotK, TP, and SS.

Kirby. I am I HUGE fan of the eldritch horrors in this game.

Haikyuu, SpyxFamily, Kuroko no Basket, Dungeon Meshi, and Kusuriya no Hitorigoto.

Vocaloid and J-pop. It's all I listen to, actually.

BOUNDARIES

Tcest, incest, and proshippers DNI

I make suggestive jokes (I'm a teen. What dost thou expect of me), but I won't be drawing NFSW, nor will I accept me or other minors being sexualized. We are not child molesters.

Please be nice! I'm not exactly the best at wording things (tone indicators save my life), but I will never, EVER be mean to someone on purpose (unless they deserve it. Then I'll go ham). While interacting on my blog, please refrain from being toxic. Some thoughts are better left to yourself

NO STEALING MY ART!! I don't know why you'd want to steal it in the first place (it sucks ass), but don't do it anyways. You can use it as long as you give credit.

I don't do commissions, but I take requests! If I see something in my ask box I like, I'll draw it. So, if you have any ideas, feel free to share them! I like having motivation boosters.

Don't.... don't try to flirt with me........ I'm taken....... I won't accept... guys please..... I know I'm hot but like.... please........ I'm also a minor....... guys..... 😞

EXTRA INFO ABOUT ME!!! IF YOU EVEN CARE!!!

16 years old

5'4"

INTP / 5w4 / 548

I ate a roly poly once (I was fIVE-)

During covid I chose suicide, now I choose homicide :)

I may be a Donnie but I am warning you, I am very. Very dumb

AuDHD (I just say I'm autistic tho because it's funnier)

Chaotic evil

Literally just a cat in a turtle body

Will Bite /threat

Keeps getting adopted by people for some reason

Yyyyyeeahhhhh that's about it, remember to be nice and have fun and shit. Stay silly gang!!!!

[flowery-mess]

Noah dating girl with atopic eczema

Soo I know this is very specific and probably not everyone is gonna relate, but as someone struggling with this condition and having big flare up this last month, I wanted to share this with you. It is important to me that this condition is spoken about, so feel free to slide in my inbox or message me if you want to talk about it.💗

*Atopic eczema is a condition that causes dry, itchy and inflamed skin. It is long lasting (chronic) condition and tends to flare sometimes. It is not contagious. The cause is unknown and there is no cure for it, only treatments that can make ot easier to lice with it.*

Noah learned about this condition when he met you.

You are used to living with it by now, but for Noah it's something new.

He sees it as any other condition and takes it very seriously.

He reads about it, because he doesn't want to make you uncomfortable by asking questions.

When you two met and it became more serious, you were scared that it will throw him off.

It's not contagious, but lots of people don't know that.

And because of that you get lot of stares and sometimes ugly comments.

When you started dating you were using your creams to make it better, but you HATE those oily creams, so you use them usually only when you know you will be in public and your skin will be seen.

As you two got closer you felt confident enough to tell him about it.

He was surprised, but just because he didn't notice it.

His reaction was very neutral, because he didn't see it as a problem, as you were scared he would.

Which was relief for you.

You stopped using your creams daily and it started showing more and more.

Noah asked some questions, mostly about how can he help, if it hurts when he touches you or if you want him to apply your creams for you.

Which was honestly one of your favorite things, him putting cream on your back and giving you a little massage along with it.

Those creams weren't so bad sinxe Noah started applying them.

But you have your ups and downs with this condition.

When it's really bad, it hurts.

It hurts like burns, and they're all over your body.

Noah makes sure you have water and your meds that help with the itching on your bed table.

He noticed that you're scratching yourself even in sleep, so he gave you one of his longsleeve t-shirts to avoid scratching yourself to blood.

He also started taking showers with you daily, because he noticed you always come out all bloody and bruised and the bathroom is like a fucking sauna.

That's because hot water triggers your skin, but it also feels really nice on your skin in the moment. But you're left with bloody hands and red skin afterwards.

So he showers with you to make sure you use warm water, not boiling hot water.

If you mention that some food or shampoo or washing powder triggers your eczema, you bet he will throw it out immediately and will look up options that are safe for sensitive skin.

When it's really bad and it effects you mentally (because it does) he showers you with love and cuddles.

He hates when it makes you cry.

Or when he sees you looking at your skin in the mirror with those sad eyes.

But what he hates the most is when you come home, obviously sad and he has to get it out of you, that someone at work said nasty comment towards your condition.

His heart aches when he sees you in long sleeved clothes almost every time you two leave the house.

It's not that you're ashamed of eczema, but you want to avoid those looks you get from strangers.

He also hates seeing you in long sleeved clothes at the band's concerts. Those venues get real hot really quick and he knows you're hot even if you say you're fine.

He makes sure to point out if your skin get's even a little bit better and he's all happy about it.

He helps you look for doctors that specialize in those conditions.

And he makes sure to attend every appointment with you, if you want him there.

He also uses it as a reason to go on vacations by the sea for a longer period than is usual, because sea helps with eczema.

Overall he helps you with everything, he helps build the confidence you lost because of this condition and he loves you unconditionally.

Remember that conditions like this don't definw you and you are beautiful and loved!💗

[octuscle]

Hey support, I really need some help. See, I totally forgot about Valentines Day and I want to do something really nice for my boyfriend because we’ve been together for a while now and I feel bad for forgetting. Is it possible to make me a huge hot superhero so I can literally sweep him off his feet and give him a night he will never forget?

As you reach for the pen, it crumbles to dust in your hand. On the way to the toilet, you tear two doors out of their frames, something is different… Your suit is also somehow tighter than usual… And it's somehow shimmering. You get a hard-on.

Even though it's Valentine's Day, you still have to get your work done You still have two offers and a project report to write. It takes a little longer at the beginning because you first have to learn not to smash the keyboard with your typing. But after using the third keyboard, you manage to type down the required pages in a few seconds. Error-free. Ready to print. Pulitzer Prize worthy.

When you ask your boss if you can leave a little early today, he reminds you of the tasks to be completed He stares a little too intently at the impressive bulge in your skin-tight latex pants. And you reply with a grin that everything is already in his inbox. He skims over the documents, mumbles something about "good work" and indicates that you can leave.

You walk a little too quickly to the flower store. You lose your grip and fly over the pavement, and not just figuratively. But the flower store is already sold out. There are no more chocolates either. But you take a quick look at the reflection in the window pane. Damn it, today you are the best Valentine's Day present imaginable.

Your boyfriend is standing in front of the wardrobe getting changed for dinner. You hug him from behind. You kiss passionately. It pulls the rug out from under both of your feet. And while the world blurs around you, you chase around the planet at several times the speed of sound.

When you break the kiss after what feels like an eternity, your boyfriend stumbles backwards a few steps. It is February 15th. In Venice, the time is a few hours later than on the west coast. The morning spring sun warms you just a little. Nevertheless, your friend is shivering. But you warm him up with a few careful breaths. After all, if you made an effort, you could make the South Pole blossom… There's no Valentine's dinner in Vancouver today. But there is breakfast at Campo San Polo

[seospicybin]

TOO HOT TO HANDLE.

PART II

Bangchan x reader. (s)

Too Hot To Handle Masterlist

Synopsis: You and Chan become contestants in a reality dating show, Too Hot To Handle. (11,9k words)

Author's note: Buckled in and enjoy. And oh, feel free to vent in my inbox x

YOU: I don't have any tricks [Laughs] I'll just do the head tilt, looking them right in the eyes and you know, flutter my eyelids a little [winks] I'm just so sexual, I think that's why they attracted to me [Plays with hair] I love bad boys. Someone with an edge to them. That's my type. [smiles]

-

"Mmh... yeah."

You're fluttering inside as Chan applies gentle pressure on the right spot, "Oh..." you breathlessly moan.

"Good?" He asks.

With your head clouded in pleasure, you manage to answer, "Uh-huh."

He grabs your leg to keep you still as you're squirming on the bed, he lathers more massage oil and lathers it down your leg.

And you thought seeing him naked was the most arousing thing you'd have to get through tonight, it's seeing his big hands on you that makes you can't stay still as you lay on your back under him.

Chan puts the bottle of massage oil back on the bedside table and he brings his head down to rest it on your stomach.

"You're like... good at a lot of things," you sweetly praise with your hand tangled in his soft curls.

He shyly smiles and turns his head to the side, planting kisses on your inner thigh, then drags his plush lips close enough to where you want him the most.

You hold your breath as his mouth is only inches away from your clothed core and groan when he places a kiss on your abdomen instead.

Chan knows what he's doing, teasing you to see how long it takes to make you fold before him. His elbow propped against the mattress to keep him hovering above you.

"I wonder if you're good at everything else too," you tell him as you drag your hand down his magnificent abs.

-

YOU: Chris is hot. I can make a cheese toast on those abs [laughs]

-

Chan's gaze is soft but the glints in his eyes are flickering like there's a wildfire raging inside of him. His skin is warm but reddening in certain places, his ears, his hands, his neck, and his chest.

There's no explanation to it except that he's horny and knowing that makes you want to tease him back.

You take his hand and take his middle finger into your mouth, gently sucking on it just to give him a glimpse of what your mouth feels like while constantly giving him the eyes,

"Can you resist me, Chris?" You turn your voice low and sultry when you call his name. You playfully tug his index finger between your teeth as you wait for his answer.

The Adam's apple in his throat bobs and he cups your cheek in his hand, he swipes his thumbs across your lips before shoving his thumb into your mouth.

Chan watches as you suck on his thumb and you twirl your tongue around it. When he pulls it out, he sees his thumb glistening wet from your saliva.

"Fuck..." he curses under his breath.

He brings his wet thumb down your front and makes you shiver as it glides down your skin. His hand makes a turn to the right, then slaps at your ass cheek, "You're so naughty."

That only makes you more aroused, you place a hot kiss on his neck and whisper, "I know."

If there's one thing Chan should learned by now is that you're bad. You're not going to make these rules stop you from forming a connection your way and that is by involving some physical stuff in there.

For you, it's impossible to make connections without physical touches involved in it, they go hand-in-hand. Also, what's the point of having an emotional connection if you don't like being physical with that person?

"I'm naughty, I'm bad so what's you going to do about it, mmh?" You ask him with another kiss pressed on his chest.

He lifts your leg to put it around his waist and squeezes the flesh on the back of your thigh. You know you're putting him in a predicament, one side of him wants to be good but another side of him wants to rebel.

Oh, you know that very well because you're going through the same thing except that you know your bad side always wins.

You tilt his head by pulling his chin down to force him to look at you, "What are you going to do, Chris?"

As Chan leans in, you can see which side of him that has won the inner battle.

-

YOU: Lana, you were wrong to send us to the private suite... [nervously laughs]

-

This morning, you wake up earlier than Chan. You use this chance to play with his curls and spot the faint freckles on his face with your fingers.

After a while, his eyes are fluttering open, and finds you staring at him.

"Morning, my beautiful man," you softly greet him with a smile and kiss his bulging bicep.

He sleepily smiles with his eyes barely open, "Morning," he replies with a croak.

He reaches for your face and brings it close so he can kiss you on the cheek, long and lingering as if it would help to bring him back to his senses.

"How was your sleep?" You ask while twirling his curls around your fingers.

"So tight," he shortly answers.

"I'm asking about your sleep. Not about me," you jokingly say.

His body is shaking from his quiet laughter, he rubs his eyes with the back of his hands and turns over on the bed to lay on his back.

You waste no time to put your body on top of him and rest your head on his chest while he puts his arms around you, two bodies becoming one in a warm embrace.

It only dawns to Chan that the night has turned to day and soon, you and him have to be back, living in the villa with the rest of the group.

On top of that, you both have to deal with Lana.

"How are we going to tell everyone?" Chan asks you.

You kiss his chest and rest your head again, "We don't. We'll just stay here," you tell him with a giggle.

His reverberating through his body and sending yours to shake along with him, "Forever?"

You nestle your head in his neck and hum, "Mmh. Forever."

-

YOU: Last night was great. We enjoyed each other's company and I think... I think we did all right [smiles]

-

The atmosphere is cold despite that it's a sunny day and the heat of the summer clings to the salty air.

Everyone is already seated on the sofa, they're watching every step you take as you walk into the cabana and sit on the sofa with Chan taking a seat next to you.

"So..." Dani is the first one to break the suffocating silence, "How was the private suite, guys?"

Chan puts his arm around you and decides to answer it for both of you, "It was nice. Nice bed, nice bath..." he pauses to glance at you, "It was great!"

You look at everyone and add, "It was romantic."

Luke clears his throat and raises his hand like he's in a classroom, "How romantic are we talking about here?"

You look at Chan while putting your hand on his knee, "We had a bath together, and played with some sex toys," you give them a few bits of what happened last night with a giggle at the end.

It feels awkward that everyone is not as enthusiastic as you to hear it. Well, you're not going to let them stop you from being happy. You look at Chan, he's looking just as happy as you and that's enough.

The melodic chimes in and your heart drops to your stomach.

"Hello, everyone!" Lana greets.

Everyone is half-heartedly answering her like they know they're about to receive bad news even though she barely started.

"Your stay at the private suite was the ultimate test of restraint to further their connection without surrendering to physical desires," Lana says.

You get a feeling that Lana is only dragging it around to heighten the anticipation and make everyone even more anxious.

"However, this was also a test of trust."

-

YOU: Wait, what?

-

"When you left for the suite, I asked the group whether they would put their faith in you as a couple."

The anxiety takes over the moment you hear Lana doing another test without you knowing. You silently groan and avoid everyone's eyes by looking away.

"If they trusted you not to break the rules, I would reimburse the $32,000 you both have lost so far."

You feel Chan's hand firmly grip your waist as he's receiving the news with you.

"However, if you break any rules in the private suite, an additional $32,000 will be deducted from the prize fund."

-

YOU: Lana, why would you do that?

-

Seeing that both of you are looking guilty and unconvincing, they are all looking so down.

"We have so much faith in you," she says but her words are filled with regrets.

You turn to the side and Chan is at a loss for words, he's just as shaken as you are. You're holding on to his hand like it's a lifebuoy that will help you keep floating while everything else is trying to drag you down.

"I can reveal that they did not..."

You hold your breath the whole time Lana is speaking and hold Chan's hand hard enough his knuckles turn white.

"Pass the test."

"Oh..." Jace dramatically slumps down his seat with hands holding his panicked face.

"Are you joking?" Lola gasps in disbelief.

"This has cost the group $32,000."

You close your eyes because it's the only thing that will help you to escape this moment.

"What did you do?" Dani asks with a stressful grin.

Since Chan is still speechless, you take your turn to speak and answer her, "We kissed."

Dani drops her head onto her hands and sighs.

"Just one?" Jane asks.

It forces you to replay everything that happened last night in your head and you find two instances that you know for sure are rule breaks. The first is when Chan pulled you onto his lap in the tub, then kissed you and the second one is the kiss you shared on the bed before sleep.

There are yelling, cursing, and groaning, everyone is going at you at once. There is no use to respond them because they won't even try to listen to you so you toughen up and let them.

-

YOU: I had no idea that they bet that much money on us last night.

-

"And because you kissed twice, you have been fined an additional $12,000."

You close your eyes again to briefly disassociate yourself from life and give yourself a space to think.

"That means your night in the suite has cost the group a total of $44,000."

It keeps getting worse and worse, the guilt is not something you can avoid anymore and you feel sick in the stomach.

Chan takes a deep breath and can finally say something to everyone.

"We had no idea you guys waging that much money on us but we're sorry... genuinely, we are so sorry," he earnestly says.

"The prize fund now stands at $91,000."

Pierre scoffs at it and shakes his head, "We'll be going home with nothing."

Everyone just doesn't have anything else to say, they're gutted to know half of the prize money has gone.

"Goodbye," Lana casually ends, leaving everyone with bitter news.

-

YOU: I thought everyone would understand so I thought– I thought we could get away with one, two kisses... [heavily sighs]

-

It's hitting in now with the girls giving you a silent treatment in the bedroom while the boys are out for a workshop.

But it's only going to get worse until you convince them that it won't happen again.

"I genuinely feel terrible you guys, I am sorry," you tell them.

Lola is not really that subtle at hiding her angry face, you know she's been holding it in ever since she walked out of the cabana.

"You know it was a test. You should have known that you have to resist," she says with gritted teeth.

"I know, I know," you tell her.

"I wasn't... it just felt right at the moment. I–"

Dani cuts you off with a sharp glare and says, "You have kissed like what? Five times? You should have learned already!"

That's true and you admit that you did wrong, but you hope that they'll give you a second chance to make things right again. It seems like the only way to prove that you want to do better is through actions.

"I'm wrong and I'm sorry," you simply conclude and wish that's enough for now.

There's only someone you can go to for consolation and you dash to the bathroom knowing that he's there. You hug him from the back as Chan is washing his hands in the sink.

His skin is smooth and hot as you rest your head on it, your hands are locked around his waist.

Chan puts his hands on you and looks at you through the reflection in the mirror, "It's going to be okay," he says.

It feels good that he knows you need the comfort and he's giving it to you without waiting for you to ask for it. To say that it's just physical is wrong, you do have an emotional connection with him and you believe it's going to get stronger from here.

"I have to shower," he says.

You reluctantly let go since you've been hugging him for quite a long time, "Can I join?" You jokingly ask even though you're dying to shower with him.

Chan laughs at it but he knows it's a bad idea. He grabs a towel and kisses you on the forehead before getting into the shower stall.

"I'll be good and wait for you here," you tell him and sit on the edge of the tub while he's showering.

Alicia comes into the bathroom to wash her hands and sees you sitting there. She laughs at you and then says, "You can shower with him."

You shake your head and awkwardly laugh, "Nah, don't want to cost the group more money."

If it was a month ago, you wouldn't hesitate to jump into the shower with him so this feels like you passed the first test of many.

-

YOU: It's going to be hard to earn their trust back but in time, I hope they see that Chris and I, we do have a genuine connection.

-

You're not the only one.

Chan is just as excited for this date that he can't stop grinning and his dimples sunken deeper into his cheeks, making him look adorable despite the muscular body he has.

The date is taking place at the beach, they have set a bonfire with a picnic mat and cushions to sit on.

Chan initiates a toast with you to start the date, "To our first date!"

You clink your glass with him and add, "First one of many!"

You feel good already after one sip of the chilled wine, mostly because what happened today has taken a toll on you and now all of the anxiety has left your body, you're completely relaxed and at ease.

"You're beautiful," he praises while tucking your hair behind your ear.

"Thank you," you mutter with a smile.

Something about him that makes you don't have to try so hard with him. You can act however you want without feeling like he's going to judge you for it, he makes you feel seen and heard, and most importantly, understood.

"So... how does it feel being the biggest spender in the retreat?" You playfully ask him, putting your hand on his knee.

"Good but not great," he answers with a scrunched nose.

You chuckle and you put your hand on his shoulder to pat him, "We have to be good, Chris!"

He bursts into laughter and looks at you, "Oh, really?" He asks with a false shocking face.

You nod but you both know that between the two of you, you need to work hard to be good. Getting out of habit is going to be hard but you're not going to give up just yet.

You look into his eyes and softly smile, "The thought that I almost lost you today made me realize how much I like you," you sincerely tell him.

Chan slyly smiling at you, "

And it's the first time in your life you care so much about someone else's feelings for you. All these times, you don't fuss much whether someone likes you or not, you're going to leave them soon anyway so why bother?

But right now, this moment, you want to know if he feels the same way.

"So you like me, huh?" He says yet again with a playful tone.

You dramatically roll your eyes at him and say, "I gave you a handy before our first date and if that doesn't say I like you then I don't know what is."

He crashes his body against you as he breaks into another series of laughter, "Why are you laughing? Do you like me or not?" You ask him again half-laughing.

He presses a long kiss on your jaw and cheek, then his hand tenderly caresses your cheek.

"I like..." he drags the word as he takes a look at your face with his lips slightly curled into a smile.

"I like your eyes, I like your... nose, I like your smile..." he says with a stifled laugh.

You find the hidden intention behind all those sweet praises, "I don't think compliments will get us a green light," you tell him.

Chan shrugs, "It's worth a try," he innocently says.

You lean forward and put your hands on his thighs, keeping his eyes engaged in intense eye contact, "Okay, then, tell me more!"

"Tell you what?" He asks with his teeth faintly biting his lower lip.

"Things you like about me," You look at his eyes and then his lips, doing it not so subtly just to tease him.

"You're beautiful and smart," he compliments, putting his hands on your shoulders.

You tilt your head to the side, "And?"

"Gorgeous and sweet and cute," he compliments more.

You notice his eyes are also looking at your lips, "Kiss me then," you dare him with your lips pursed at him.

Chan leans in but instead of kissing your lips, he places a soft kiss on your nose, "We have to be good, remember?"

You whine and pout, then let out a sigh as Chan puts a space between your bodies, "I can be good, right?"

He brightly smiles at that and holds your face with both hands, "We got each other," he assures.

With that being said, you have nothing to worry about when you have him on your side.

-

YOU: I want to do this the right way and that means I have to show everyone that I can be good.

-

There's a bowl of grapes and you take turns feeding them to each other, Chan playfully bites at your fingers when you shove them into his mouth.

"That hurts!" You yelp.

He laughs at what he did and pulls you close, placing you to sit on the space between his legs so he can hold you from the back.

He delightfully sighs as he looks up at the night sky, "We can't see the stars," he says.

You turn your head to look at him, "I know another way you can make me see stars," you tell him.

He knows exactly what you meant by that and slyly grins at you, "Mmh, yeah, I can hit you hard on the head."

"Ooh, you choose violence, huh?" you exclaim with a sharp hiss.

Chan tightens his hold around you while nuzzling his head into your neck, squeezing you like a plushie toy. You have nothing to complain about when you like his big arms enveloping you whole.

It seems that Lana won't be kind enough to gift you a green light tonight. You bet it's because she has seen what you can do and a green light would only unleash more bad out of you instead of the opposite.

"What do you want to do if it goes green though?" You ask out of curiosity.

He brings his mouth close to your ear but instead of whispering his answer, he gently bites at your ear and then drags his mouth down your neck.

"Oh... who's the bad boy now, mmh?" You say with eyes closed as he brushes his lips on the sensitive skin behind your ear.

Chan knows what he's doing and you can't tell if he's testing you or he simply wants to tease you, bringing out the bad in him when you're trying to be good.

Either way, you're doomed.

-

YOU: It's so easy to be bad but to be good? Ugh... I need a lot of strength.

-

The lights are on and you feel like sleeping for another hour.

Chan is still lying down next to you, he suddenly takes your hand and puts it around him as he turns to lay on his side, forcing you to spoon him from behind.

You spot a faint freckle on his shoulder and kiss it, cuddling him while everyone else is chatting from their beds. Your hand is resting on his chest and you feel like teasing him by lowering it to his abdomen.

"Let me say hi to the morning wood," you softly whisper into his ear.

You hear his quiet laugh as he grabs your hand and clasps it with you, then puts it back on his chest, not letting your hand wander around his body.

Rome isn't built in a day and certainly, it's going to take you more than a day to leave your bad habit.

Lana chimes in for her usual morning greeting, "Good morning!"

"Morning," you reply while yawning.

"I hope you are enjoying your new watches," Lana says.

"I think our watches didn't work," Jace jokes.

"Ours working just fine," Pierre says.

You keep cuddling each other under the duvet while intently listening to the talk bouncing around the room. Low-key jealous that Pierre and Alicia got the first green light.

"Was it good?" Chan asks from next to you.

Pierre laughs and exchanges a glance with Alicia. Jace cuts in with the most important question, "How long did the green light last?"

Pierre thinks for a moment, "Like two to three minutes."

"I can work with that," Jace says with a smirk.

Trying to be good is not easy and the more you try to get away from bad things, the harder it gets.

You bring a bottle of nail polish with you to pass the time by painting your toenails while sunbathing outside.

Chan finds you in deep focus to pain the other foot and comes to your aid, "I'll do it for you," he offers.

You hand him the nail polish and beam a smile at him, you watch as he carefully paints your toenails with blue nail polish.

"You are good at everything!" You compliment while wriggling your toes, impressed by him.

He smiles in pride and puts your feet on his lap, he leans down to blow air on the still-wet nail polish. Your feet are sensitive so what he's doing makes you feel ticklish, sending you giggling and squirming in response.

Chan definitely knows about this and he's using it to tease you.

"Stop it, Chris!" You scold, yanking your feet away from his grip.

"Okay, okay, I'll stop," he says but he keeps holding your feet by the ankle.

The more you try to get out of your bad habit, the more sexually frustrated you are.

-

YOU: I am struggling right now. I just need a little... something [groans]

-

It's kind of suspicious that Lana starts the party early today.

She calls everyone to gather on the beach and have a party there with cocktails served and ready to drink.

You don't want to be caught off guard but you need a sugary, alcoholic drink with a cute little umbrella on it.

"This is so cute!" Dani squeals next to you.

Instead of sitting next to Alicia, Pierre sits between you and Chan. You glare at him in suspicion, "Are you like... cockblocking us?"

Pierre sips his drink and grins, "Yes, yes, I am."

You scoff and laugh, "But I could kiss Alicia, you know?" You tease him with a mischievous smile.

Pierre curses out loud in French and makes his way to sit next to Alicia, protecting his girl from you. Chan flashes you a grin and puts his arm around you.

The music is playing loud enough against the sounds of waves crashing but no one is dancing, everyone prefers to sit around the small bonfire and chat with each other.

After being locked in the villa with them for weeks, it would be impossible not to have some sort of attachment to them because you're going through the same thing.

"Oh, my God! The boat is coming here!" Dani points out at the boat that is indeed getting closer to the shore.

Everyone is cheering as the boat stops and two people are getting off of it, a boy and a girl. This can only mean one thing.

"Hi, everyone!" The new girl says, coming in her red bikini and dark wavy hair. She has a hot body and her tan skin is glowing under the afternoon sun.

You leer at Chan to see any reaction that could tell the possibility of his head turning for the new girl.

"Hello, I'm Claire," she introduces as she gives you a quick hug and a cheek-to-cheek kiss.

"You're too fit, girl!" You say passive-aggressively and a courteous smile on your face.

You watch for details as she introduces herself to Chan who's standing next to you. He gives her his dimpled smile and you roll your eyes immediately.

Looking around, you can see that you're not the only girl bothered by Claire's presence.

-

YOU: Player recognizes player, okay? This new girl will stir things up, I just can tell.

-

The party moves up to the villa and the new guests are on a tour as Lola takes the role of the guide.

You're going to the dressing room to freshen up and fix your make-up before getting back outside. You accidentally bump into the new boy instead, you forget what his name is because you were too focused on the new girl.

You were applying a fresh coat of lipstick when he greeted you, "Hey!"

You glance away from the mirror to see him standing in front of his closet, "Hi..."

It's the first time you take a good look at him, he's tall and has beautiful brown skin, he has tattoos covering his left sleeve and you can see that he has an edge to him.

He takes off his shirt right there, exposing his lean body and a big tattoo on his back. You don't want to be presumptuous but it seems like he's doing it on purpose.

You burst into a low laugh, "I'm sorry, what's your name again?"

He takes two steps closer to you while buttoning up his shirt, "It's Mac," he answers.

It's dangerous. Mac is the type you're always going for and you have to stick to your new regime of getting away from bad things so you decide to leave.

You put away your lipstick, getting up from your chair while smoothing down the hem of your dress.

"Nice to meet you, Mac!" You tell him with a smile as you walk past him.

You're right to think that the new guests are going to stir things up.

You take a deep breath as you walk back outside, expecting Chan to get all over the new girl like the other boys and surprisingly, he's not.

He smiles at the sight of you and pulls you into a hug.

"Where have you been, mmh?" He murmurs with his mouth on your neck.

It's like he knows your head is about to turn a little.

-

YOU: Nah [shakes head] My head is not turning. It's not [nervously smiles]

-

You wake up next to Chan and you give him a morning kiss on his cheek, playing with his curly hair and feeling delighted to see another sunny day.

You can only hope that your gut feeling is wrong for telling you that something is about to happen soon, good or bad, you hope it has nothing to do with you or Chan.

"I think I'm going for the new guy," Olivia says, sounding chipper than usual.

"Mmh. You should, he's hot," Dani says while brushing her long hair.

You look at the new girl and she's quietly putting on her make-up at the end of the long vanity table. Just like Lola reads through your head, she asks her, "How about you, Claire? Have your eyes on anyone?"

Claire puts away her mascara and picks up a brush, "Uh... for now I'm trying to keep an open mind and get to know everyone," she answers.

That sounds vague, sounds dangerous for you, and not that you're intimidated by her great physique. Chan is a man after all and prone to temptations.

Everyone is called to the cabana as usual and you decide to do your hair later, you can't make Lana wait for you.

Chan is prepared with his hand outstretched at you to make you sit next to him, putting his arm around you like someone is about to pull you away.

"Looking like a snack today," he whispers to you.

You crack a laugh and hold his face as you whisper back to him, "You are welcomed to eat me."

He pinches your forearm as a way to get back to your naughty response, making you wince in pain. The melodic chime sends you both sitting up straight on the sofa.

"Hello, everyone!" Lana begins.

"Hi, Lana!" You greet back with a tense smile even though you have nothing to worry about.

"As you know, I encourage genuine romantic connections. So I have planned dates for our new guests."

Everyone's attention is on the two new guests, Claire and Mac. The couples seem to be alarmed that their partner may get picked to go on dates with them, including you.

"Claire, please select someone from the group to take on a date!" Lana orders.

The girls are looking tensed next to their man, you want to look coy but you shoot her a subtle glare just so she knows not to mess with me.

"My pick is..." Claire is looking in your direction.

Your heart is pounding, afraid that she'll dare you and pick Chan.

"Nick," she settles with the safest choice since Nick isn't with anyone at the moment.

-

YOU: That's right. Smart girl knows better not to mess with someone's man [smirks]

-

"Mac, please select someone from the group to take on a date!"

Now it's the boys' turn to get nervous and you can see that Chan's jaws tensed, it's somehow making him look more attractive.

Okay, you have something to confess. You don't want to sound overconfident but you caught Mac giving you the eyes for a few times. This morning, as you cuddled Chan on the bed, you noticed that he was watching you from his bed.

Since this morning, you've been lying to yourself by constantly assuring yourself that Mac does not have any interest in you. Now that he's being given the chance, you can only hope that you're overthinking it.

Olivia is the only one excitedly waiting for his answer while the other girls are pretending not to care about it.

The tension keeps on building the longer it takes for him to settle on a decision. You look away and try not to get sucked into the gravity of the situation.

"There's someone I'd like to get to know better," Mac hints by looking in your direction with a devilish smirk dancing on his face.

Then Mac calls your name and your head snaps in his direction, "You and I," he says with his tattoed finger pointing at you, "on a date."

It suddenly gets eerily quiet in here and you can hear seagulls cawing in the distance. Everyone senses a drama brewing from the moment Mac chooses you to go on a date with him right in front of Chan.

-

YOU: Okay, this is the big test [nods] but here's the thing, I'm never good with tests [winces]

-

Your date is later at night and you've been contemplating what you should wear for it. You want to look good but at the same time, you don't want to give the impression that you're anticipating this date.

You're nervous, nervous because you don't trust yourself and you definitely can't trust Mac.

Chan comes into the dressing room looking defeated already, he's watching you putting on makeup from across the table.

"Are you worried?" You ask without looking at him.

He intertwines his hands together in front of him and pokes his inner cheek with his tongue, letting out a big sigh instead of answering you.

You finish your make-up quickly and come to him, sitting on his lap to hold him. Honestly, you feel a little sad that he doesn't have that much trust in you but you understand why.

"Don't think about it too much," you tell him.

He puts his hands around you and pulls you closer, burying his head in your chest as he inhales your scent.

"I won't be long," you assure him while softly scratching at his scalp.

It's almost time for you to go, you slowly pull away and hold the side of his face, "I'm going, okay?"

You kiss him on the cheek and get off his lap, looking over your shoulder at him before exiting the door.

-

YOU: I kind of wish that he puts a little more trust in me [softly sighs] Time to prove myself, I guess.

-

Mac grips your waist as he gives you a quick hug and a cheek-to-cheek kiss, "Oh, what a lush!"

You're smiling hearing his words and sit on the cushion since it's almost the same kind of date you had with Chan before, except that it's in the backyard of the villa.

"How are you?" He asks as he hands you a glass of champagne.

"Good. How are you?" You answer then take a sip of your wine.

"Never been better!" He shorty replies.

It's better to have small talk and be boring, you reckon. You think of something to ask him, "Where are you from?"

"South Africa," he answers.

"Oh, that explains the accent," you try to sound impressed and remain coy at the same time.

"So... You're with someone," he says, going straight into the main topic.

"It's nothing serious but yeah, I'm seeing someone right now," you hate that you sound so unsure of yourself when you answer him.

"Seems like I'm going have to step on toes anyway," he casually says.

Mac is bold, daring, and extremely attractive, he's so dangerous that he makes all of your alarms go off at once, telling you to exit this situation or else you won't survive.

-

YOU: Lana, you're so bad for dangling a sexy, bad boy right in front of me and thinking that I can resist it. [Sighs]

-

The plan to bore him is not going according to plan.

It's hard to make it boring when he looks so hot in his white shirt and his tattoo is peeking out of the opening of his shirt.

"I'm just going to be frank, you're my type," he remarks with an easy smile.

You don't mean to get flustered but it just happens, your body is acting against your will.

"How about me? Am I your type?" He asks, his tattoed fingers are playing with his luscious lips.

You look down at your drink and pretend that you see something interesting in there, "Well, I'm—"

You're getting tired of dodging away and decide to be your true self, "Yeah, you're definitely the type that I usually go for," you honestly answer.

Mac triumphantly smiles, "I can see that. I can see that you're wild and I meant it as a compliment."

"Thanks," you say with a dry chuckle.

It feels wrong that you start to enjoy this date but you're sure it's because you let loose, you're slowly coming back to your habit and it's comfortable, luring you to get back to it.

"Want a bite?" He offers, gesturing at the bowl of sliced fruit and the chocolate fondue to dip it in.

Again, your body is acting against your will and you nod at his offer.

He takes a piece of banana and dips it into the warm melted chocolate with his fingers. You hold his hand by the wrist to keep it still while you take it into your mouth.

"You got something," he says, wiping the smeared chocolate on your upper lip with his thumb.

Mac doesn't hesitate to lick his thumb after and it's only fair that you do the same for him, you carefully bring a piece of strawberry dipped in chocolate to his mouth and try not to let it drip onto his white shirt.

"You spent quite a lot of money, I heard?"

You nervously laugh again and nod.

Mac is so straightforward and you know that everything he says to you is unfiltered, they're purely what he thought of you and you're scared to hear more of what he thinks of you.

"It's hard to follow the rules," he says.

"Yeah..." you half-heartedly respond.

He gazes into your eyes and somehow manages to get closer to you, "I want to get my fair share of the fun," he remarks with a flirty gaze thrown at you.

It takes no genius to know what he means by that and your heart starts to race, there's no exit strategy because you've never been in a situation that requires you to say no to a kiss.

"Also because I have a lot of catching up to do," he says with his eyes centered on the lower half of your face.

All you know is how to say yes to everything, there are no rules, no restraint, and no self-control whatsoever.

He looks deeply into your eyes and his voice drops lower than before, "What do you think?"

-

YOU: Chris keeps slipping off my mind and I... want to kiss Mac.

-

The steps you're taking to get back to the villa are getting heavier and heavier.

You put on a smile at the sight of everyone mingling around with drinks in their hands and look for someone in mind, found him sitting by the firepit.

Chan is talking to Jace and Lola when you appear, "Hey..."

Jace and Lola seem to understand that you both need the privacy, they kindy excuse themselves to leave.

Even though he's wearing a black shirt that enhances his broad shoulders, it doesn't look as stunning as when he wears it with confidence.

You take a seat next to him, facing the firepit with the fire lying low and swaying from the wind. You take a moment to compose yourself before looking at him.

"Can I be honest with you?" You begin.

He nods but he figures that you need his verbal answer, he clears his throat, and then says, "Yes."

"I'm quite disappointed that you don't have any trust in me," you sadly say.

You can hear his deep sighs full of regret. He takes your hand and holds it, "I trust you. It's me... I'm not confident with myself."

He lifts your hand and kisses your knuckle, "I'm sorry," he sincerely says.

You nod and hold his gaze, "That's okay, I understand."

There's a pause and it's getting so suffocating, there's so much to say but you're afraid of the reactions you'd get.

"So, how was the date?" He asks.

You need to answer it carefully but lying is also not the best option, you mull it for a moment to come up with an answer, "Uhm... he said that I'm his type and he uh..." you speak while cautiously watching for his reaction.

"He said he doesn't mind stepping on your toes," you add an awkward laugh to lighten the mood.

A crease is forming between his eyebrows and his jaws are clenched, "The fuck?"

You quickly think of something to say to turn it all around before he gets burned by rage.

"He is my type but..." you laced your fingers with him, "We didn't do anything."

His face is less tense than before and the glints return to his brown eyes.

"I know I said I like bad boys but that's because I haven't met you," you tell him.

A smile rises on his face ever so softly like a sunrise. His angry face is incredibly attractive but seeing him like this makes you feel warm inside.

"Yeah?" he asks with a smile that grows wider and brighter on his face.

"Yeah," You answer without a beat.

He pulls you onto his lap and hugs you so tight, he plants a long kiss on the top of your head, then places another kiss on your cheek.

"I'm glad you're back," he murmurs.

"With you," you add to his sentence.

"With you," he repeated with a laugh.

-

YOU: Everything I've done I've failed at but not this time. I passed the test and it feels good [smiles]

-

When the lights are on the next morning, your eyes refuse to open.

"Too early," you groan and stay lying on your bed with your eyes closed.

Chan shifts on the bed and without warning puts his body on top of you, he props his elbow against the mattress to not put his whole weight on you.

You slip your hands under his arms and feel the ridges on his back muscles, they're firm yet smooth like touching a marble sculpture.

"How's your sleep, baby?" You softly ask with your hand in his soft curls.

Chan only answers with a hum and a kiss on your collarbone.

There's a talk going on in the room as you cuddle on the bed, the attention is on the bed at the other corner of the room where Nick is sleeping with the new girl, Claire.

You don't pay any attention to the chat until Jace asks, "How about you, Mac? How was your date last night?"

You're more afraid of Chan hearing how your heart starts to pound inside your chest and he's resting his head right on top of it.

Mac subtly glances your way and brushes his dark wavy hair to the back, "It was fun getting to know her. It was a really fun date."

Alicia is uneasily throwing glances at you from the next bed while you can only guess if Chan is listening to the conversation or not.

"Did anything happen?" Claire asks while biting her nail.

Fucking Claire is being fucking nosy and you unconsciously gripping the pile of duvet next to you.

Mac cracks a laugh then says, "I wish."

Oh, no! Chan hears everything. He lifts his head and looks over his shoulder at Mac, you can't see it but you believe it's nothing good.

There's tension in the room and it needs an intervention, Jace claps his hands together and snaps everyone awake with the loud sound of it, "Let's start our day, shall we?"

"Yeah, yeah," a few people replied with a croak and a yawn.

Chan seems to be like his usual self, he kisses you before getting up from the bed to start his day. You start yours with a quick yoga session with Dani and Alicia, after that, you take a dip in the swimming pool to cool down.

You climb out of the pool and someone has been waiting for you with a towel in his hands, from the tattoed fingers you can guess who it is.

"Good form!" Mac praises.

You sheepishly smile and wipe the beads of water from around your eyes, "Thanks!"

"You're a good swimmer," he praises again and hands you the towel.

"I took private lessons," you playfully reply and dab your face with the towel.

"Oh?" He looks surprised.

"That explains it!" Mac is not embarrassed to get caught checking you out from head to toe and back to your head again.

To think that you're safe from danger is so wrong. Mac was serious when he said he won't give up just yet only because you're with someone already.

You remind yourself that it's best to avoid it rather than try to handle it and risk failure.

"Sorry, I have to get ready," you tell him.

He licks his lips and nods, "Sure, yeah."

You're walking away with the towel and can feel his eyes following you until you're out of his sight.

-

YOU: I see my old self in Mac. I'm literally fighting my demon here.

-

Everyone seemed to be dreading it already as they gathered in the cabana for that time of the day.

With the new guests, it's possible that there were rule breaks last night but not you, you've been exceptionally good for these past few days so you can sit back and relax this time.

Lana comes online with her usual greeting, "Hello, everyone!"

You can reply to her at ease today, "Hello, Lana!"

Chan has his hand on your knee and his thumb is making lazy circles on the skin, it gets ticklish at times but soothing, it makes you calm.

"I must inform you that yesterday further rule breaks occurred."

You cringe at the announcement and quietly mutter, "Damn..."

"Resulting in yet another reduction in the prize fund."

Dani groans the loudest and the others are trying to disassociate themselves from this moment. Dani squinted her eyes and pointed her hand at you.

You lightly shake your head and calmly deny, "Wasn't us."

She then turns her head around to guess the perpetrator among the group. But before that, she assures everyone that it's not her and Luke, "Promise you we did nothing."

You have your eyes on the new girl Claire and she's sitting right next to Nick, they look guilty right now.

"It's better if you own up to it fast," Alicia says with a fed-up tone.

Claire nervously grins then finally admits, "We did."

"There we go!" Pierre exclaims in satisfaction.

Gosh! You're so glad that you're not in their positions right now. It's so intense that you can feel the heat of their intense stares at them.

"We had a kiss at the date," Claire begins, then she looks at Nick before continuing.

"Things got heated on the bed but... we hurriedly stopped ourselves," she explains.

As if that would help her to get out of this easily. She's new so everyone is not amused that she's spending this much money when she's only been here for a day.

"The rule breaks committed were one kiss on the beach, one kiss in the bedroom, and late at night, a mutual gratification," Lana comes up with the bill and it's shocking.

In this point of view, you understand now how devastating it is to hear a few grand of money lost for some kisses and a handy.

"This has cost the group $22,000."

-

YOU: Look at you! Spending all that money on useless things [smirks]

-

"The prize fund now stands at $69,000."

Your eyes widen at the amount of money taking a nosedive and you're responsible for half of it which reminds you to not say anything or it'll hit you back right in the face.

The worse is it's not the end of it.

"There was another rule break!"

The hunt for the next perpetrator is up and Chan suddenly stops drawing circles on your knee, you turn to look at him and he's looking at Mac.

You get the impression that he didn't believe it when you told him you did nothing on the date with Mac. Of course, you don't need to worry about it but, sadly, he has trust issues with you.

"It was me, okay?" Jace confesses and that explains why he's exceptionally quiet today.

"Cut your boy some slacks, please?" He begs, putting his hands together to apologize.

Even Jace can't stay good for long and that only shows how things in the retreat are getting harder instead of easier. It's always darkest before the dawn, they say and you hope they're right.

-

YOU: It's obvious that Chris has a trust issue with me and I understand... I don't even trust myself that well [looks down]

-

It's good that you have the chance to get away from Chan for a workshop.

You're aware you have to eventually talk with him but for now, you need a space and time to think by yourself. You haven't had the chance to recalibrate your new self with your old self and it feels like you're lingering on either side of it.

A lot is going on and you need to process it. It's good that you have no time to waste in between, after the workshop, you go straight to the dressing room to get ready for a party.

The theme for tonight is Masquerade and they have provided a box of costumes for everyone. You dressed up in a black lacey dress and a mask that matches it. You're not in the mood for partying but you can't just throw a tantrum and refuse to do a filming.

Chan has sensed something is off with you from the absence of smiles and the unenthusiasm drawn on your face. You deem that they have enough footage of you and decide to leave in the middle of the party to the dressing room.

You take off your mask and plop down on the chair, sighing and thinking out loud. Not long after, Chan enters the room and sits next to you.

A moment passes in silence and Chan brings his chair closer to you so he can put his hands on your knees, "Want to talk about it?"

You're not ready to talk about it yet but letting this going on for too long isn't good either. You look him in the eyes and ask, "Didn't I tell you that I did nothing with Mac on the date?"

He innocently nods and answers, "Yes, I know."

"Then why did you doubt me earlier?"

"When did I—"

"When Lana said there was another rule break and you immediately thought it was me," you cut him off with the answer.

His mouth is open but nothing comes out of it. He seems to have a lot to say too and you dare him to say them out loud, "You didn't trust me at all!"

He grits his teeth together to suppress something in him and fiercely looks at you, "Maybe I would have trusted you more if you didn't entertain him."

You jerk your head back hearing his wild accusation, "Entertain him how?"

His fingers are pressing on your knee and dug into the flesh, "Maybe if you told him off and showed him that you have no interests, he would leave you alone."

"I told him that. I told him that we're not exclusively together but I'm seeing someone and that is you," you stare back into his eyes.

"And that's the whole truth," you conclude.

Chan not willing to let it off as well,  forward with his jaws all clenched, "Then why did I see you talking to him?"

You scoff in disbelief, you didn't expect him to be this angry over a simple thing, "It's not against the rules and it's not like... I can control what people can do and not do," you say and unintentionally raise your voice louder at him.

Mac's presence may have brought out the bad in you but he brings out the worst out of Chan. It makes you see everything that is wrong between you and Chan.

Aware of what you've just done, you let out a sigh and lowly mutter, "It's us, you know."

-

YOU: It's no longer about Mac, it's us, we're... wrong for each other.

-

Despite that you're still sharing the same bed and waking up next to each other, the others know that you and Chan are going through something.

A few of them must be relieved to know that there's a low chance for the two of you to rule break and spend some money.

"What's going on, babe?" Dani asks as she applies concealer under her eyes, "Are you guys okay?"

You sigh as you pick a brush to use to apply your make-up, "I'm not sure..."

There's still a little anger left in you but you're also sad that there's a possibility you'd lose this thing with Chan. You like him but you don't want to force this to work when it doesn't feel right to you.

"He has doubts and I have my doubts," you continue talking with another deep sigh.

"I think you should take time to think," Dani says.

She stops doing her make-up and looks at you, "I've seen you two from the very beginning and there's something there, I think it would be a shame to throw it away."

She picks up her makeup pouch, "So give it time, think it over, yeah?"

It feels good to know someone is rooting for you but on the other hand, someone sees this as an opportunity. Mac sees you sitting alone on the terrace and walks up to you, "Looking good today," he says with a smile.

You return the smile, "Thank you, Mac."

"Can I sit?" He asks gentlemanly.

You pull your feet close and hug them to make space on the sofa, "Yes, please."

He sits there with his legs spreading open and eyes that gaze right into your soul, "You know that I'm very open-minded about this whole situation and I'd like to know where your head at," he begins.

To be honest, you can't find the answer yet. You still need more time and space to think things through.

"I don't know. It's... so confusing," you tell him with a sigh.

Mac softly laughs and runs his hand through his wavy dark hair, "What do you want to happen, you know, ideally?"

That seems to put things into perspective. What do you want? Do you want to start things over with Mac and throw things away? Or try harder and fight for things between you and Chan to work?

Of course the former sounds so much easier, and simpler but are you ready to end things with Chan?

"To be honest, I'm not ready to throw what Chris and I have built since day one," you answer.

You have to admit that Chan is right about not entertaining Mac about this idea. You owe him the real, honest answer.

"It's not about you, I didn't lie when I said you are the type that I go for, but what I really want..."

It's time for the truth and you want to lay it as gently as possible to not hurt his feelings.

"What I want is to move on and continue building this connection with Chris," you finish.

Mac seems to understand, he's nodding as he processes your answer.

"That's fair!" He says with a thin smile.

"You're good-looking and a gentleman, it's just... what Chris and I have is special, genuine," you explain with a polite smile.

"Okay, you can stop making me jealous now," Mac jokingly says.

You feel bad for him, but you can't have everything and think that there'll be no consequences for it.

"Can I give you a hug?" You hesitate to come to hug him.

"Yeah, get in here!" He answers, opening his arms for you.

You share a friendly hug with him to thank him for being so understanding. You keep it brief to avoid Chan misunderstood it all over again.

You decide to leave first to make it less awkward for him, "I'll see you around," you say with a smile before leaving.

-

YOU: Not sure what's going to happen but what Chris and I have is worth fighting for.

-

Thankfully, you get the space and time you need with the boys out of the house for a workshop.

You think of things you want to say to Chris to figure out what's next for whatever it is between you and him. Also, mentally prepare yourself for the outcomes, good or bad, you're trying not to have any regrets in the end.

Pierre and Luke are already coming back from the workshop, but you don't see Chan. Pierre comes to join Alicia on the bed next to yours.

"Where is he?" You ask him.

Pierre props his elbow against the mattress, "I saw him pull Mac aside," he tells you.

That startles you that you get off the bed, "Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

He waves you off and calms you down, "Don't worry. It's nothing like that," he pauses to pop open a button on his shirt, "They're talking. That's all!"

That's not enough to make you relax and you're not manifesting it but things could get ugly. You often forget that there'll be people there since it's a TV show after all.

You patiently yet anxiously wait while drinking in the dressing room, you moved there because the couples are getting lovey-dovey in the bedroom and it sucks being the only one without a bed partner.

You hear the sounds of footsteps approaching and you look at the doorway to see Chan.

To say that you feel relieved is an understatement, you crash your body into his and throw your arms around his neck.

"I missed you," you murmur.

You've only been away from him for hours but gosh, it feels like days. Being away from him just for a minute drained the life out of you.

"Missed you too," he mutters, his lips grazing your ear shell as he speaks.

-

YOU: Well, at the end of the day, we realize how much we mean to each other.

-

Chan holds you back and lifts your feet off the ground while pressing a kiss on your neck. You stay like that, soaking each other's warmth.

After a moment, he puts you down and presses his mouth close to your ear, "Put on your swimsuit and meet me at the pool," he whispers.

There's no time to ask why and Chan is not asking so you just nod at his order, "Okay."

As everyone else is getting ready for bed, you change into your bikini and head outside to the swimming pool. Chan is doing a lap in backstroke and stops as he sees you coming into the pool.

He catches you by the waist as you jump into the water and keeps hoisting you against his body. His wet hair stuck to his face and you brush it to the back for him.

"Is it time for another swimming lesson?" You ask with a sly smile.

The first swimming lesson wasn't a lesson to begin with and you ended up spending $18,000 that night. You have no idea what he's trying to do tonight but you plan to not think much.

He looks so hot with his hair wet and his body soaked in pool water. As if the visual wasn't enough, he constantly has his hands on you.

"What did you boys actually do in the workshop, mmh?" You jokingly ask him.

Knowing well enough now that it's not a swimming lesson and your heart is beating fast, because what if you made the same mistakes as last time?

He puts the strands of hair escaping your messy bun from the nape of your neck, then places a hot, wet kiss on it. You let out a stifled breath when he pulls away, his kiss leaves a searing feeling on your skin.

"I can't stop touching you," he whispers as he holds you from the back.

He turns you around and you hurriedly avoid his eyes, knowing what they are capable of. You hug him instead with your arms around his shoulders.

It's a fight or flight situation and since your skill in fighting your old self remains questionable, you choose the latter option.

"It's getting late," you tell him.

He kisses your jaw before asking, "Want to head back inside?"

You nod and he complies right away. He helps you get out of the pool, he holds your hand as he leads the way back inside the villa.

-

YOU: Who would have known? The student becomes the teacher [smirks]

-

It's too early to feel relieved yet.

Everyone else is already tucked in their beds, leaving the two of you being the last one still awake and roaming around the villa.

"Come here!" Chan says, pulling you by the hand to pin you against the sink.

Without looking into his eyes, you can feel the intensity of his stare as he cages you in his arms and leans close enough that you feel his warm breath fanning your cheek.

You put your hands on his chest to maintain this not-so-safe space between your bodies. He's been hanging you on the thinnest thread all night and you want to know what he has in mind.

"What are you—"

Before you can finish your sentence, he lifts you by the waist and then sits you down on the sink. It amazes you how he can easily lift you like you're a paper doll.

Chan puts his arm against the edge of the sink and cages you in between, slightly bending down to see you eye to eye.

He holds your chin to force you to look back into his eyes and he triumphantly smiles when you do. He then brings his mouth close to your ear, "I'm feeling bad," he breathlessly says.

And you think you're the only one capable of being bad? Despite your heart pitter-pattering inside your chest, you dare to ask him, "How bad?"

It's embarrassing how he can hear your ragged breathing as he places slobbering kisses down your neck. He then looks at your face with his lips merely inches away from yours.

"Really, really bad," he answers, then crashes his mouth against yours.

His hand reaches to your back and pulls at the straps of your bikini top, untying it open in one strong pull. He pulls you close as he deepens the kiss until your breasts are squashed between your chests.

-

YOU: I suddenly forgot who I am, where I am... what am I doing.... No, wait, I actually know what I'm doing [giggles]

-

This is such a plot twist.

When you're trying to be good, Bad Chan comes out to play. You lose count of how many times he kissed you until he decides to carry you into the shower.

Chan puts you down to turn on the shower and sets the water temperature right while you take off your bikini bottom. He follows suit after, taking off his swimming trunks as you wash yourself down with the warm water.

He joins you under the shower, putting his big arms around you and not hesitating to use them to freely roam around your body.

He cups your breasts in his hands and gently fondles them, "You're so perfect..." he delightfully sighs.

You grope down his body until it meets his hardening member, wrapping your hand around it to give it slow strokes.

He turns your head to the side so he can capture your lips in a passionate kiss that drowns you in pleasure. One hand glides down to your core and softly touches you there.

"Mmh... so soft," he sighs against your lips.

He parts your legs open and positions himself behind you, slipping his cock between your thighs gap to gain friction and making you more drenched than you already are.

Chan plants his mouth on your neck and you can feel his cock getting harder and harder with each passing second. You're lowly moaning as he sucks on your skin and his hand squeezes on your breast.

"Chris..." you mewl, seeing his fingers pinching on your nipple.

He turns you around and wastes no time to push you to the wall, he lifts one of your legs to his waist so he can easily enter you, sliding his length into you.

"Oh, my..." you gasp, surprised by how well you take his impressive length.

You cling onto him as he starts thrusting into you by steadily lifting your leg with one hand. He's watching your reaction as he sets a steady pace of his thrust.

You have your eyes closed most of the time, drowning in pleasure with how good he's fucking you right now. When you open your eyes, you find him with his lips curled into a sly smirk.

He seems to enjoy watching how close you are to falling apart with your mouth parted open, lowly moaning his name.

Chan hastily kisses your open mouth and asks, "Harder, yeah?"

He doesn't necessarily need your answer, he puts his hand on your other leg and hoists you against him. You immediately wrap your legs around his waist and this maneuver launches him deeper inside you, making you gasp in response.

"Oh, you feel so good," he says with his lips wet from the shower.

You kiss him to drown out the noises you make while your hands are helplessly clutching at his shoulders when he picks up the speed of his thrusting.

It's getting hotter inside the shower you can't tell if it's the water or the tension that caused the foggy glass wall.

-

YOU: Let's say we ticked everything off the list in one night [smirks]

-

It's another day of waking up next to Chan.

He flashes you a smile the second you open your eyes and it feels like you both became teenagers once more. You put your hand across his chest and sweetly kiss his cheek.

"Good morning, my beautiful man," you softly say with another sweet kiss on his jaw.

He holds the side of your head to return the kiss on the cheek, "Morning, baby."

Despite the bright sunny day outside, a storm is about to hit everyone soon as Lana chimes in right after the lights are on.

"Oh, shit," you quietly mutter under your breath as you force yourself to sit on the bed.

You can sense that it's that eerie quiet before Lana brings the thunderstorms in a second. Chan holds your hand and puts it close to his chest as he sits with his back on the headboard.

-

YOU: I hope Lana didn't see anything last night [grimaces]

-

"Good morning, everyone!" Lana greets.

Your heart skips a beat and you believe Chan can feel you gripping at his fingers. You're putting on a calm face even though you feel like hiding under the bed right now.

"I am very disappointed to report there were several breaches of the rules."

Everyone turns their heads in every direction and at this point, anyone could break the rules, not just you. You look at Chan and he looks as still as a sculpture.

Claire looks at Nick and says, "Do you want to start?"

Nick scratches his head and he gets red in the face already, "Uh... we had a kiss last night," he admits.

"And that's it. We stopped right after," Claire quickly adds to soften the blow.

"Claire and Nick, your rule break has cost the group $6,000," Lana announces.

Everyone else shows mercy for them or maybe they're too exhausted to have to deal with losing money first thing in the morning. Lana knows how to make everyone's day bad.

"There was another breach of the rules," Lana further announces.

It's the first time you hope someone else is breaking the rules because you're not ready to come forward yet. You look around the room and notice that Luke raises his hand.

"We broke the rules last night," he meekly says.

"Rules?" Lola asks with wide eyes.

Dani covers her eyes next to him and lets Luke speak for both of them. He rubs his chin and sighs, "A kiss and..."

Luke glances at Dani to continue talking, "We got carried away while showering together, a little gratification," he finishes with a nervous laugh.

You gulp air at the mention of shower and knowing that you're not the only one done dirty in there. That doesn't make you any better, if anything, it makes you feel worse.

"Dani and Luke, your rule breaks have cost the group $14,000."

Jace is the only one laughing at it but doing it so painfully when Lana updates the amount of money left in the pot.

"The prize fund now stands at $43,000."

The whole room is filled with groans and moans, there's not much left compared to the initial amount of it. You can't imagine how they would react when they know the worst is yet to come.

"However..."

-

YOU: Oh, here we go [deeply exhales] Please, tell my mom, I love her.

-

"There was an additional, serious breach of the rules."

You look at Chan and see that he prepares himself to speak to everyone. He scoots over to the edge of the bed and sits there. You follow to sit behind him, holding his hand and folding it around his waist.

"Okay, I'm trying to be honest here," Chan begins.

"Oh, no.." Olivia immediately responds with a disappointed sigh.

They kind of expected that the biggest spending couple is most likely the one who committed a serious rule break. They're dreading it all over again.

"A few kisses and it led to sex," Chan confesses.

You hold his hand tighter in yours and hold him close with your other hand on his arm.

"This was all my fault. I messed up, I'm sorry," he sincerely tells them.

Everyone is turned their heads away from you both and looking devastated if not disappointed. No matter how sincere he is about his apology, they won't listen because it wouldn't bring back the money you both have lost.

"You both yet again failed to show any form of restraint and broke the ultimate rule of my retreat: sexual intercourse."

Everyone has their head hung low and some are covering their faces as if they're too scared to face reality.

"There was $43,000 in the prize fund but because of the numerous rule breaks last night..."

You're under the eye of the storm now, ready to get shredded into pieces and then sucked into oblivion.

"Your prize fund now stands at $0."

They're right to close their eyes, the reality is a scary thing to see.

-

YOU: So, what's going to happen now?

-

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[thespacesoffalseandtrue]

Speed Up

a piece i wrote for my moon that was too good not to share it!! inbox is very full, im trying to get out all the requests, but it is still opened :)

warnings: minors dni, unprotected sex, fingering, car sex, idk let me know what else i miss.

“Why won’t you tell me where we’re going?” You asked, squeezing the side of Josh’s arm as he drove you on some mystery road-trip. He smiled at the dark road you both were bouncing over. Wherever he was taking you, the country surroundings suggested there wouldn’t be modern conveniences like hot water and cell phone reception.

“Because I’m enjoying your attempts to pull it from me far too much,” he answered, glancing over at you. His eyes sparkled with wicked joy. Your heart did a flip in your chest.

“Is that so?”

He made a noise of agreement and gave you a shy flirtatious smile.

“Fine, if you want to play games, I can play,” you said unbuckling your seatbelt and climbing over until you were situated across his lap. You laced your fingers behind his neck as you settled your weight on him, you were so grateful you decided to wear a skirt tonight. You felt the jeep accelerate a few notches but didn’t say anything. You could feel the steering wheel behind your back, Josh kept one hand on the steering wheel, one eye on the road, but the rest of his body was focused on you.

He gave you one of his sly smirks but it disappeared immediately when your mouth covered his. It wasn’t quite a moan, it went deeper than that, but the sound that came from his chest when your lips parted his and your tongue crept into his mouth was all Josh. You weren’t paying the jeep that much attention, but you thought you might have detected another increase in speed. Josh kissed you back, matching every slide of my tongue and movement of your lips with his own. His free hand slid beneath your sweater, traveling up your back. It was warm, soft, and touched me so delicately. The jeep hit a particularly nasty bump, slamming your lap down hard against his.

Heat spread from the area between your legs, and this time it was you who made a noise that came from somewhere deep within. The dangerous reality of the two of you driving down a dark, gravel country road at thirty to forty miles an hour didn’t quite sink in when your hands left his neck to tug at the hem of your sweater. If he wasn’t going to do it, you were.You threw the sweater over your head and into the backseat.

“Babe,” Josh said, his voice was slightly strained so you knew you were doing something very right. “I’m trying to drive here.”

Moving your mouth just outside his ear, you whispered, “Me too,” right before you took his earlobe into your mouth, sucking it softly.

Another sound slid up his throat, this one so loud it caused his chest to vibrate against mine. “Hell with it,” he said, with no hesitation or uncertainty in his voice. It was as firm and resolute as his body thrumming beneath yours.

With one flick of his fingers, your bra snapped open, sliding down your arms until it landed on the floor beside Josh’s feet. His mouth covered yours again, hot and unyielding. You couldn’t breathe. You didn’t want to if it meant not being able to kiss Josh like he was kissing you right now.

“A little help?” he breathed in between kisses. His hand grabbed yours and lifted it to the top button of his shirt. “Unless you want to finish this thing in the hospital, I’ve got to keep one hand on the wheel.” His words were strained, like you knew yoirs would be if you could talk right now. “I want to feel you against me,” he said when your fingers forgot what they were supposed to be doing. Even with both hands fumbling with it, it took you one long kiss to get the first button freed. Realizing the year would be over before you finished the job, you stopped kissing him so you could focus. A bit more. The way he looked at you as you pulled away rendered you almost useless.

“Are you sure this is safe?” You asked, forcing yourself to take a controlled breath. You had to replace and store as much oxygen as your lungs were capable of before getting back to Josh. “Not that I really care, but I’m sure we’re breaking about every traffic law ever.” Two more buttons free, a few more to go.

You grinned, it was the little things that made you happy.

Josh’s smile evened out as both eyes met yours for an instant. “Of course you’re safe,” he promised, his glance shifting back to the road. “I would never put you in harm’s way. I would never let anything happen to you,” he said, like it was a mantra. “You know that. Right?”

“Of course I do,” you said, looking down at him before focusing on the next button. You weren’t letting the turn in conversation stop you. “I was just checking. Straddling a driver while we attempt to undress each other at forty miles per hour is a first for me. Just wanted to get the safety seal of approval before proceeding.”

“This better be a first,” he said, the seriousness of before fading. “And consider your safety seal stamped. I can control a vehicle better than I can control myself.”

“Baby,” you said, freeing the last button right before you tugged the shirt free from his pants, “your words never fail to make me want to swoon and squirm at the same time.”

Pulling his shirt from his body, you slid your chest against his. The soft parts of your body molded to the hard parts of his. The lightest sheen of sweat was covering his chest, mixing with the glow on yours. Another uptick of the speedometer arrow.

“I wouldn’t want to disappoint you,” he said, his free hand clamping tight around your back.

“You never do,” you whispered through a smile as your hands moved down the cut ridges of his stomach, settling on the seam of his jeans. Now this button your fingers managed to tug free in the time it took for one surprised inhalation from Josh. “Baby.” There was warning in his voice, but also welcoming.

Pinching his zipper between your thumb and finger, you slid it down, torn between wanting to savor the moment and wanting to let it devour you whole. Done with the zipper, you folded the material of his jeans down and slid over him once more, until you could feel his body warmth between your legs. He groaned, moving beneath you, making you gasp out loud.

“Fuck,” he muttered as both arms wrapped around you before he slammed on the brakes. His arms were tight, tighter than any seatbelt would have been.

“I thought you could handle it,” you said, smirking at him.

His chest rising and falling hard against yours, he met your smirk with one of his own. “I was wrong.” And then his mouth was on yours, his hands cupping your face. His body pushed against yours, arching my back over the steering wheel.

“Yes?” You managed to get out. It was a one-word question, and he didn’t need any further explanation. You felt his smile against your mouth as his tongue teased yours for another moment. He held your face as firmly as one could and still be considered gentle; his mouth pulled back, and his eyes met yours.

“Hell yes,” he replied.

You sneaked your hand into the waistband of his boxers and gave his length a few pumps. He sighs against your mouth.

“Play fair,” he says as he moves the fabric of your skirt out of the way and dips his hand in your panties. He rubs your clit slowly and languidly, taking his time, savoring you.

Your mouth crashes against his once again and your core aches to have him fill you up.

“I need to feel you inside me,” you tell him, springing his hard cock free of his boxers. He moves your panties to the side and you slide his length along your wet folds. You take him all in slowly, allowing yourself to adjust to the fullness of him.

He latches his mouth against your breasts and you roll your hips to ride him as he toys with your nipple.

“You’re perfect,” he says to you, giving your hips a squeeze.

His teeth graze your collarbone and you gasp out at the sting of the sensation. You feel his tongue run across your skin and you know there will be a purple mark there the next day. You move your hands to the nape of his neck and give his curls a tug.

He trails kisses up your neck and lands on your mouth. The kiss deepens are you both fight for dominance over the over, you move your pace faster on his cock. His hand moves from your hip to your clit and begin to rub it in quick fast circles to match your pace. Your body begins to tense at the stimulation. You know you are close.

You arch your back and press your chest against him and call out his name.

“I’m so close, cum with me please.”

“I’m right there with you,” he tells you as he begins to thrust up to meet you halfway when your pace falters. The heat of your orgasm begins to wash over you. The fire scorches through every vessel of your body.

“Josh,” you moan out, “I’m cumming, don’t stop,”

“I won’t,” he says, latching on to your peaked nipple once again. You shut your eyes and continue to fuck him through your orgasm. You feel his cock twitch and you feel him empty inside of you.

Your body pulses as you come down from your high, you open your eyes and find him staring straight at you. Both of you were breathing heavy, sweat beaded your chests and eyes were heavy with the high of ecstasy.

You feel his cock grow soft inside of you and you bring your lips to meet his in a soft, feather of a kiss.

“What are the odds we repeat this again in twenty minutes?” He asks you as he helps you pull your sweater over your head and climb back over to your seat.

He puts the jeep in drive.

Your body was still alive with the feeling and thrill of him.

“I’d say very likely, my friend.”

[littlemisssatanist]

can i ask for a small favor? can you rant about daemon targaryen please? i just re-read your team green 💚 post and i'm reminded of how much ick i feel towards that character, especially in the wake of the team trailers being released.

hiii!!! tysm for this ask i was super happy when i saw it in my inbox i'm flattered people want to hear my opinions lol

my thoughts about daemon are very convoluted. i think he has the potential to be a very interesting character but it's kinda canceled out by the incest and pedophilia thing.

like. i understand it's an incest dragon show but my main issue with team black when it comes to their criticisms. they love to spout endless words about how aegon is a rapist and how alicent is a rape apologist for not... idk slitting his throat i guess.

it's really ironic to me, because these same people will turn around and then yap about how daemyra is the perfect ship. they'll be aghast when you even slightly suggest you enjoy aegon's character in any way but be in an uproar if you dare bash their dashing and roguish prince daemon.

honestly, name one terrible thing aegon did and i'll be able to give you something daemon did that is arguably worse than that.

aegon - raping a servant girl in the show (which honestly i'm treating more as a fanfiction considering how terribly written both the greens and the blacks are).

daemon - uhmmmm probably the whole thing with nettles. you know. the sixteen year old girl he groomed and raped (yes raped because minors aren't able to consent). actually, now that i think of it, he did the exact same thing with rhaenyra too, huh? or does team black find the whole fleabottom episode to be hot and rhaenyra being sexually free? that seems like the sort of thing they'd take from that whole fiasco.

on the topic of blood & cheese: the way some people defend this is honestly sickening.

'but poor luke was killed by his terrible uncle aemond' he was an envoy of war (not to aemond, btw, he owed him no safe haven) and also he kinda. yk. took out his eye. i'm not saying luke deserved to die, but i'm going to be honest this is one of the more mild things that happened during the dance.

whether luke deserved to die (which i'd like to reiterate: i do not think he did. i can understand WHY aemond killed him, but that is not me EXCUSING him. this is for those of you who don't know how to read and will inevitably find a way to start putting words in my mouth) b&c is completely unexcusable.

it's team feminism until its a woman who doesn't fit your little box of badass hottie. it's team feminism until that woman doesn't bow down to rhae-rhae and betray her own family and children in order to join the 'good side.' it's team woman until you point out that rhaenyra was groomed by daemon and continues to make decisions that are decidedly anti-feminist.

this is why i can't stand team black stans who say things like 'i hate the greens except for helaena bc she didn't do anything wrong' because you quite literally cannot do that without admitting that helaena suffered because of the blacks NOT the greens.

helaena suffered bc of DAEMON not because of any actions taken by the greens. DAEMON was the one who orchestrated b&c, the one who sent men to terrorize her and kill her children.

daemon did that.

i have no problem with people who can admit that their faves have flaws. i admit aemond's flaws, daeron's flaws, aegon's flaws. the problem i have with daemon is that his stans are so insufferably annoying and they literally cannot do any of that.

my last thought about daemon (at the moment, at least) is his relationship with strong boys.

lots of tb likes to say that daemon loved those boys like his own and would never do anything to hurt them. and i... honestly find it a little strange, and also a little embarassing, because how am i going to have a better grasp on his character than those that love him most???

i genuinely believe that daemon, had rhaenyra ascended to the throne like viserys planned, he would have caused 'unfortunate accidents' for the strong boys in order to get his blood on the throne. which, btw, was one of the main reasons viserys named rhaenyra heir, to keep daemon from sitting on the throne.

i think it the succession crisis had been between daemon and rhaenyra instead, it would have been a much more interesting storyline.

then again grrm isn't that good at writing interesting storylines when it comes to daemon considering he's a self-insert. honestly i wouldn't be surprised if when he died it was found out that grrm had a fanfiction written somewhere where daemon survived the fight with aemond and got to live out the rest of his boring ass life grooming little girls. who knows.

[horansqueen]

Dating For Dummies - 1

❤ Story Masterlist

❤ Notes:

written from both Opal & Niall's POV

i don’t proofread, I never do, I hate it.

AU comedy/fluff/smut/romance

1.7k

I accept requests and ideas for this story, so message me in my inbox!

if you want to be notified when this story is updated (or be taken off the update list) CLICK HERE

OPAL

The neighborhood was not as quiet as I had expected, but for the monthly price we were asked for this new apartment, I couldn't really complain. I let myself fall on the overly comfortable couch Niall's mom had offered us with a satisfied sigh and a big smile on my lips. The room was almost empty except for a few boxes placed between old furniture friends and family didn't want anymore, and I had to admit that the colors of the walls were horrible, but at least, it was my home. It was our home.

I couldn't pretend Niall and I were not close, but I couldn't also say that we were like peas in a pod. We came from the same group of friends, and we did spend some time together, but being alone was not something common for us. I liked him, I knew he was the kind of roommate that wouldn't be too invasive and he was quite nice to look at too, I couldn't deny.

He slowly sat next to me, leaning his arm on the back of the couch behind me, and crossed his ankles. I didn't need to look at him to know he was as excited as I was to start this new life.

"Finally free." he let out in a low tone, making me chuckle.

"Yea I bet you were so oppressed living with you mom." I let out with sarcasm in my voice before letting out a chuckle. I turned my head to look at him and shook my head slightly. "Poor darling." I added, sliding my fingertips gently on one of his cheeks, his stubble scratching my skin lightly.

He raised his eyebrows and turned to look at me to, making me smile even more.

"Why do I have the feeling that this amuses you more than it should?"

I leaned closer and licked my lips before grinning even more. "Because it does." I whispered, letting out a laugh louder than I expected.

He rolled his eyes but the way the right corner of his mouth moved up told me he knew I was joking. It took a few seconds but silence finally came back between us and I blinked a few times, watching as the sun slowly moved down, adding an orange color to the cloudless sky.

"Okay, how about I take care of the tv and we can watch a movie?"

I was the one raising my eyebrows this time, pleasantly surprised by his offer. I had expected Niall to spend time by himself most of the time, or at least not with me, and perhaps it was just because it was out first day and he didn't want to be alone. I quickly nodded without making any comment or asking any questions and he jumped off the couch to do what he had suggested.

It took him about 15 minutes and everything was ready, which is another thing that surprised me. It made me realize that I didn't know much about him and perhaps it was simply because it was new, but I wanted to get to know him better.

We had met through the friend of a friend and although we would all meet up for beers at the pub on saturdays and study together once every two weeks, it never occurred to me that Niall was someone I could get along with. Not because he was not interesting, or because we didn't share the same interests, but just because I had never taken the time to think about it before. The only things I had really noticed about Niall was that he was hot, funny, popular, and that he was way out of my league. Not that I wanted him that way or anything, but it was a simple fact. I was also aware that he could definitely hold his liquor which was not something I could pretend was my forte, but I always stopped drinking before being too drunk ; you never know what can happen in a bar and although I loved my friends, it was hard for me to trust anyone. But that's an other story for an other day.

I knew I shouldn't but in the middle of the movie, I glanced at Niall's phone, noticing he was getting many notifications through the evening. My mouth curled again into a grin when I noticed he was actually swiping on a dating application.

"Ae you looking for the kind of love that lasts forever, or the kind that lasts only a few hours?"

"How's that any of your business?"

My heart jumped in my chest but when my eyes met his, I realized he was joking and I smiled back at him.

"It's not, but I'm on the same app. In fact, I'm on thee different apps." I admitted, leaning my head against the couch for a few seconds before bringing it back up, slightly ashamed of myself. "Hey that's what happens when you spend all your time working on other type of relationships, and making sure you get excellent grade in college."

"Yea, you keep telling yourself that, love." he chuckled, shaking his head.

"And what's your excuse?" I asked, half-joking, half-insulted.

He stared at me a few seconds as if he was trying to find a good answer and finally shrugged. "I'm tired to date girls who only love me for my looks."

I laughed shamelessly. "Someone is delusional."

"Yes, you." he argued. "Do you really think you can find a decent guy on these apps?"

"The self-burn is strong."

His face went from a frown to annoyed and ended up making a grimace. "Oh shut up, Pal."

"This is the most horrible nickname I've ever been given." I pointed out. "And yes, I still have hope to find someone worth my time on these apps."

I was not sure I really believed it was possible but I really wanted it to be. It really seemed like it was the only thing missing from my life.

"You should focus on just getting some." he shrugged. "When you don't expect anything, you can't be disappointed."

I knew it was a lie, everyone was expecting something, whether they wanted to admit it to themselves or not, but I didn't say anything about it and only shrugged.

"Okay, I have a date tomorrow night." he pointed out, turning to me and sending me a smile so big I could see his teeth. "And she looks like a gem."

I moved his phone so the screen would face me and my lips parted very slightly at the sight of a gorgeous brunette in a very tight dress, holding a pink drink with a tiny umbrella floating in it. That girl, unlike me, was totally in his league.

"She may look like a gem but who knows if she is."

He shrugged, unbothered. "I guess I'll find out tomorrow."

"Admit it." I pressed after a few seconds of silence, turning my whole body his way and bringing one of my legs up on the couch. "All you care about is getting laid by pretty girls. The word 'serious' never qualifies the word 'relationship' in your world."

"I've been in serious relationships before, what about you, smartass?"

My eyes roamed in his face, trying to find out if he was lying but I just licked my lips. "Yes, I have."

I didn't want to get into depth about my past romantic relationships and I had the feeling he didn't want to share details about his either.

"You want to know what I think?" he finally asked, turning his body to face me too.

"No."

"I'll tell you anyway." he stated quickly.

"How surprising." I mumbled, rolling my eyes.

"You've been so hurt before that you're scared of falling in love again." he speculated. "That's why you never go on dates with anyone on these apps."

"How the fuck would you know that?"

"Prove me wrong, then."

We remained like that, face to face and in silence, just staring at each other. I could feel my heart beat hard against my rib cage, trying not to give in. After all, I didn't have anything to prove, not even to my new roommate, right?

"Fine!"

I quickly grabbed my phone and typed on the screen as fast as I could, hitting 'send' before I could change my mind. I had been talking to a guy for a few days and he was the right candidate to meet, or at least pretend to meet. After all, I could always tell him I changed my mind and Niall would never find out.

"There." I turned the screen his face, bringing my phone so close to his face he had to back away a little to be able to read.

"He replied."

My heart skipped a beat at his words and I tried t swallow the lump in my throat. Shit, I hadn't expected a quick answer. I looked at the screen and held my breath when I realized he had written a time and a place to meet up. I could always back off and cancel, but that would mean I would have to admit that Niall was right ; I was fucking scared to fall in love again.

"Great. See? We both have a date tomorrow night!" I didn't know how credible I was but at least I was trying.

"I was kidding, Opal, you know it, right?" he asked with concern in his voice.

Once again, my eyes roamed on his perfect face and I shrugged very lightly. "I know."

I suddenly felt very stupid for thinking this little banter was more serious than it really was, but at the same time, it was a relief. I didn't want Niall and I to be on bad terms and somehow, I felt like we could become close friends and for some odd reason, I really wanted it.

"You don't have to go on a date with anyone, you have nothing to prove."

Oh and why not? I didn't know if I was ready to be with someone again but one date couldn't be that bad… right?

[zombiecicada]

The People Have Spoken.

But don’t worry, I can do a DTIYS for the next milestone, if I reach 100 followers!

But for now, here is the event:

Submit theories, head canons, or guesses you have about the characters or lore shown thus far about the Wolfbell AU.

Rules:

-You can submit as many as you want. There is no limit to how many entries you can submit, your only cap is your own imagination. You have my permission to explode my inbox. Is there a limit to the inbox? I would like to test this theory. Please specify if your submissions into my inbox are asks for the Kirby Oc Tourney or for the 50 Followers Event I am an easily confused creature. Alternatively, you can make an actual post with your submission, but be sure to tag me so I can see it and specify that it’s for the event in the post.

-They do not have to be about Wolfbell (the character) specifically! Feel free to take a stab at some of the other characters within the universe or simply the lore and story itself. As long as it’s relevant to the overall AU, it counts.

-These theories/head canons can be as simple or as complex as you want them to be. Fully and completely encourage walls of dialogue and text and in depth analysis. ‘Haha I think character likes *x* or *y*’ and that’s the theory is just as valid. Just know, I’m a sucker for a good long lore dump and it is my weakness.

-Submissions can be serious or silly, it’s both serious but I also want to hear your unhinged hot takes.

-Please keep it fairly SFW. That being said as the Wolfbell AU is more on the NSFW side covering darker themes, I will allow such, within reason. If you’re uncertain feel free to ask me.

-If you submit entries in my ask box you need to not be an anon because I can’t declare you the winner if I don’t know who you are.

-Feel free to include little doodles and illustrations for your submissions, however this is not required! You can also include your own ocs interacting with mine or interacting in some way to make it more fun.

-If two people submit the same exact ‘correct answer’, I will go with the one I feel best explained or conveyed the theory and or head canon. Again, I’m personally biased for blocks of text.

-While there are multiple ways to win, you cannot ‘win twice’, if you submit more than one ‘correct answer’ and make it to the top three you’ll still only win once and two other people will still be other winners. The ‘winning answer’ will simply be the one I liked most and any additional ‘correct answers’ will simply earn you bonus doodles. In the total there’s gonna be six winners, three ‘most correct answers’ and three ‘most incorrect answers’, along with several little bonus winners where I was amused and entertained.

-If you submit an answer and it’s spot on and you crack the lore, obviously for spoiler purposes the submission will be handled differently. But there will be bonus ducks.

What will happen:

Gonna let this contest go on for a week! By the end of the week, I will go through all of the submissions and I will slap them all on a ‘iceberg’, with the most unhinged and non canon answers in the void and the closest to canon answers on the surface!

The top three at the tip top of the iceberg and the bottom most three will get a prize! A full body coloured render of their Kirby oc (or if you don’t have a Kirby oc/don’t want it to be a Kirby oc we can discuss that but yeah, prizes!) if you ‘win more than once’ by submitting multiple ‘correct answers’ you’ll simply get funny little bonus sketches of your characters.

Any questions or concerns, please DM me here on tumblr or on my discord.

Event will end at midnight Pacific Time on Sunday June 23rd.

[bbgnyx]

smut prompt 01/10~bangchan

@dinopanties ty for the request!! really enjoyed writing this, and I hope you like it. feedback is always appreciated! ily

a/n: ok i'm back from my short hiatus!! can't wait to write more now! take a look at my prompt list and feel free to drop requests in my inbox or comment on that post!! xoxo

❣❣❣❣❣❣❣❣❣❣❣❣❣❣❣❣

You were sitting by the bar, whiskey in one hand. You took a sip and checked your phone again to see a message from Chan saying that he’s running late because of traffic. You sighed very well knowing that your best friend forgot the timing of your hangout.

You had been waiting around for 30 mins when Chan finally arrived. “Hey beautiful”, he said as he sat down next to you, his eyes wandering up and down your body. Chan had always found you hot but was too shy to ever make a move and spoil the friendship and so he kept quiet about his attraction towards you. You punched his arm, “Don’t ‘hey beautiful’ me, you were late by 30 fucking minutes!?!”. He winced, “Ow ow, I get it, you’re strong”, he teased. You stared at him, waiting for an explanation. "Okay, fine. I completely forgot about our plans today," he admitted, apologizing with those adorable puppy eyes and pout. But you couldn't stay mad at him for long. He had a way of making your heart flutter, and if you were being honest, you liked him more than just a little. In your eyes, he was everything.  

Taking another sip of whiskey, you sighed, "Ugh, I can't stay mad at you for too long." Chan chuckled, asking about your life and anything interesting that had happened. As you both sat there, engrossed in conversation, time flew by. The whiskey had you feeling intoxicated, and the sight of Chan in his black shirt and loose jeans had you feeling more than just a little aroused. The way he adorned himself with jewelry drove you wild, making you lose control of your desires.

It didn't take long before you found yourself shamelessly checking him out. Chan noticed and smirked, placing a hand on your thigh. His touch sent shivers down your spine, causing a small moan to escape your lips. His smirk only grew wider. "What's the matter, princess? Is my touch making you wet?" he taunted. You rubbed your thighs together but he forced them open hand sliding to the inner side of your thigh.

“Chan not here”, you whimpered, all your senses feeling like they might disappear at any moment now. Chan couldn't wait until you got home, so he pulled you into a nearby bathroom stall. He pressed you against the wall and kissed you aggressively, your tongues battling for dominance as your bodies pressed together. Desperate for friction, you tried to grind against him. Breaking the kiss, both of you were panting for air.

"Have I ever told you how fucking hot you are?" Chan groaned, marking your neck with dark purple bruises. You shook your head. "Well, babygirl, I'm about to show you just how much you drive me crazy," he said, removing his shirt and sliding your dress down. Pushed against the sink, your leg on his shoulder, he devoured you mercilessly.

You whimpered and moaned not being able to contain your voice due to the immense euphoria you were feeling. "Be quiet baby, you don't want anyone to hear us, would you?" Chan asked as he kept nipping at your pussy, devouring it. You managed to mutter a yes and bit down on your lip, pulling his hair and earning grumbles from him, the vibrations sending waves of pleasure through you. As you neared your release, you signalled Chan. He went harder until you came all over his mouth.

He licked his lips and not wasting another second, he pulled his pant and boxers down revealing his huge length. He turned you around and slid inside without warning. “Ahh fuck Chan, t-too much”, you whimpered. Ignoring your plea, he intensified his rhythm, thrusting into you with an inhuman speed, hitting your sweet spot with precision each time. "Babygirl, I'm gonna fuck you till you can't walk tomorrow", Chan muttered, his words laced with profanity. You struggled to remain silent, but his words aroused you to the point of losing control, releasing soft moans of pleasure. Sensing your impending climax, you clutched his shoulders tightly, leaving crimson imprints. He continued his rapid thrusts, causing you to cry out in ecstasy as you climaxed, coating his member with your juices. Chan persisted, relentlessly pursuing his own high. Overwhelmed by the intense stimulation, tears welled up in your eyes as you threw your head back. Before long, he released his warm, dripping seed deep inside your tight opening, his eyes closing in bliss. Withdrawing from you, he gazed upon the dishevelled sight beneath him. You were now his beautiful mess.

[roo-bastmoon]

"so in that kumbaya post u just openly admit ur a fat ugly single abused people pleasing jkker? not suprised. u all r. id kms if i were u."

Hmm.

Okay.

Quite a bit to unpack, there.

To answer your question: Yes, I'm a bit overweight right now--it's part the hormone blockers for the cancer and part my own emotional eating the last few months because, ya know, it's a bit stressful battling cancer. I plan to get back into working out after Yoongi's concert, though! And I'm not hideous, but I'm definitely not gorgeous. You're right, I'm single, have been for years, by choice. I do tend to people please a LOT (working on boundaries with a really sassy wonderful cognitive behavioral therapist--10/10, highly recommend CBT!). And I absolutely love and adore Jikook, for sure, as well as all of BTS.

So... guilty as charged.

But no, my "flaws" aren't a reason to DIE. I still have value, dear throw-away-account-in-my-inbox.

Despite my many shortcomings, I still have purpose. I still get pleasure. I can still do amazing things in the world and create some meaning in this life. All people are works in progress. Me, too. Who told you you had to always be exceptional to ever be worthy?

I'm not perfect. But I can try to be good.

In case you need a reminder, here's what "good" looks like:

I hope you heal from whatever wounds others gave you to make you calloused and aggressive toward total strangers.

I hope when you read this that you unclench your jaw and relax your shoulders, because you are safe and sheltered and you know there's no immediate threat.

I hope you can afford a nourishing meal and a long hot shower with amazing-smelling soap to restore some of your energy, which must be flagging, since you're spending it on Asks like this.

I hope you get a great night's sleep in a comfy bed, and wake up feeling refreshed and ready to face whatever challenges are a part of your days. Because I'm certain you have challenges just like everyone else.

I hope you have someone you trust, who you can talk to, who will listen to every word intently, and try to empathize and understand you and give you good counsel.

I hope at the end of your day, when all the work and chores are done, you get to read a really engrossing story, or listen to a thought-provoking podcast, or check out some amazing music that makes you feel alive and excited to be so.

I hope you remember yourself--your true self--the kind of person who can be kind.

Because the universe returns your energy back to you. I promise you, eventually, it does.

So here's some kindness from a random overweight absolutely flawed single Jikook fan on Tumblr, who genuinely wants you to be healthy and whole as soon as possible. We all will be better off when you start to heal.

Now, to get us both back into a place of calm and gratitude, you inspired me to make a donation to NAMI. If you ever need mental health help (and who doesn't?) they have some great free resources that you can check out HERE. Please never seriously consider killing yourself, or even joking about it, for any reason. Every day, every moment, is a new chance to start from scratch and make your life into something you prefer.

And if you're not open to talking to a therapist right now, there's a free app called Insight Timer with tons of great meditations, calming exercises, insightful podcasts, and mood-resetting music.

So, this is as much of my time and energy as I can give to you. I wouldn't have even answered you, except the K-pop community just suffered a loss from suicide this week and I felt it important to address what you said. But now I've got some streaming and voting to do in between my real-life responsibilities. So this is the last we will interact under your sock puppet account. But I hope you see this post, and I hope you know I really mean it. I really mean that you deserve to heal from this toxic anger you're taking out on others. I know you can be better.

"Who says a dream must be something grand?

Just become anybody.

We deserve a life.

Whatever, big or small, you are you after all."

--Paradise, Love Yourself: Tear, BTS

For everyone else, if I keep getting Asks from sock puppets like this, I'll turn off the option to message me unless we follow each other. I already turned off anons ages ago because of these types of messages. I will limit access to me, not as a punishment, but just because it's important to protect my (and my friends') energy against negativity. I am here for BTS, not drama.

This fandom needs to work harder to reflect BTS' values, or else what are we all doing here?? You don't have to agree with anyone about anything, but you do have to at least be civil.

If you're looking for a fight, you won't get it from me. My tongue is ruled by the law of kindness.

With sincerest respect,

Roo

P.S. Jimin and Yoongi are close to record-breaking milestones. Please don't waste any time or energy on this sort of thing--keep streaming!