#feathertying

[coridallasmultipass]

I (temporarily) conquered my anxiety and depression and went to a feather tying class with my tribe! This class, we started the foundation of what will eventually become a "cux" ("kookh") headdress! The feathers will be splayed out kind of in a way similar to how I'm holding it for the pic, otherwise, it's just a long line of tied feathers. This is awesome, because I have some really culturally important feathers to me, and now I know a way that I can attach them to a cord. (I missed the first round of classes where they learned individual feather tying, or I would have brought mine for that.) Traditionally a cux would have black magpie and crow feathers, and then an accent of white, but these were what was able to be provided for the class, so it's definitely not as dramatic and formal as tradition, but still very cool and important to learn with. (Also, being a fiber nerd, I notice we're working with cotton yarn, which is not traditional at all, but will thankfully be much longer lasting than any grasses that were traditionally used.) So yeah, hopefully my anxiety and depression aren't as severe next week when we finish, because I had to load up on medication before I even entered the building, and was still shaking with anxiety when I sat down. 🪶 (If you didn't see my story from yesterday. Well. My fish died. And I'm just not okay at all because I already deal with severe grief on a daily basis, and this just brought it all out again (fuck March, I hate this fucking month), ESPECIALLY because my care and documentation of care for my aquariums is meticulously logged, BECAUSE of my anxiety. I think she was possibly eggbound, but there's no way to know, because sometimes fish just die, and I didn't have time between noticing the symptom till her death to even research how I could help her release eggs. And I keep looking at her empty tank, expecting to see her. Uneaten pellets are still sitting on the top of the glass from when she refused dinner the night before. It's depressing and anxiety-inducing and I don't know what to do to make it ever stop.) 🪶🪶🪶🪶 #n8v #native #ndn #indigenous #chumash #feathertying https://www.instagram.com/p/Cpwn69JOIdQ/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=