#fdf2

[firebirdxvi]

Fils du Feu 02 ~ Flamme d'Espoir

Maître Cyril avait rassemblé tous les Immortels après que l'agitation générale se soit calmée. Dans la grande salle de réunion, celle qui leur servait à méditer ou à communier ensemble, les murmures allaient bon train. Cette ambiance était tout à fait inhabituelle, et il du attendre un moment pour obtenir le silence. Lui-même se sentait gagné par une fébrilité nouvelle, et il se força à garder le ton calme et monocorde que tout le monde lui connaissait. Son rôle allait devenir encore bien plus important...

Il tendit les mains et commença à parler :

- "Vous savez tous que le grand jour que nous attendions est arrivé : le sérénissime Phénix, flamme de vie, de mort et de renaissance, nous a fait la grâce de s'éveiller et de nous bénir de sa divine présence." Il ressentait un plaisir coupable à prononcer enfin ces mots. "Cependant, son voyage fut long et son retour dans son vaisseau charnel peut s'accompagner de quelques difficultés que nous devrons aider Sa Grâce à surmonter. Bien des années se sont écoulées, notre archiduché est détruit, la famille Rosfield anéantie, mais l'espoir de tout reconstruire perdure."

Des soupirs se firent entendre autour de lui.

- "Le secret absolu doit demeurer. Aucun d'entre vous ne doit évoquer le Phénix hors de ses murs. Celui qui s'en rendra coupable sera exécuté sur le champ. Tel est la loi de notre ordre dont je suis le garant."

Après ce rappel intimidant, un adepte leva la main avec révérence pour demander la parole.

- "Allons-nous le laisser sortir ? Il voudra sûrement découvrir comment le monde a changé en son absence... Comment se porte-t-il ?"

Cyril prit le temps de choisir ses mots.

- "Sa Grâce se remet à peine de son long coma. Des traumatismes physiques et mentaux semblent l'affecter, mais rien que nous ne pourrons surmonter. Si le Phénix est puissant, la chair est faible ; nous devons nous en accommoder. Pour le moment, sa guérisseuse attitrée" - il désigna la concernée - "continuera de s'occuper de sa santé."

- Vous avez parlé de problèmes... mentaux...", risqua un autre adepte sans avoir levé la main.

Il coupa court à sa question en notant le regard courroucé que Cyril lui lançait de dessous sa capuche. Le Maître consentit malgré tout à répondre :

- "Il est inutile de vous cacher la vérité : son esprit a été abîmé par la terrible expérience de Fort Phénix. Sa mémoire semble défaillante et il peine à se souvenir de ce qui s'est passé." Il attendit quelques instants avant de reprendre. "Nous faisons face à un autre problème que nous n'avions pas envisagé. Si son corps a changé, son esprit est toujours celui d'un enfant de dix ans... En plus de cela, il paraît avoir oublié beaucoup des usages de la vie quotidienne. Même parler lui est difficile. Il doit réapprendre tout ce qu'un enfant est censé assimiler en l'espace de plusieurs années. Il restera dans le Nid encore un moment je crois."

- "Mais c'est terrible !...", se plaignit une adepte prête à fondre en larmes.

- "Ses pouvoirs d'Emissaire semblent intacts, n'est-ce pas l'essentiel ?" répondit Cyril, sur la défensive. "Ce n'est qu'une question de temps avant que Sa Grâce ne retrouve toutes ses facultés. Il pourra marcher au milieu de vous quand le moment sera venu." Les adeptes joignirent les mains et quelques-uns tombèrent à genoux. "Continuez de le servir comme il se doit, et la meilleure manière pour vous de le faire, c'est de suivre mes ordres. Retournez à vos taches."

Il mit fin à la réunion et les Immortels se dispersèrent. Seuls restèrent dans la pièce Cyril, la soigneuse du Phénix et la jeune Jote. Elles avaient assisté à tout ce qui s'était passé et même à certaines choses qu'il n'avait pas révélées aux adeptes.

- "Il va sans dire que je vous ordonne le silence sur ce que j'ai moi-même tu", annonça-t-il. "Ils n'ont pas besoin de tout savoir. Et de toute façon, tout ceci passera. Il lui faut du temps..."

- Oui, Maître. Sa Grâce est restée endormie cinq ans...", soupira la soigneuse. "Imaginez le choc qu'il a eu en se levant de son lit et en voyant son image sur la surface polie du mur de sa chambre..."

- "Il vous l'a dit ?" s'étonna Cyril.

- "Pas vraiment. Il ne prononçait pas encore des sons... articulés quand je l'ai quitté. Mai je pense l'avoir deviné. Il se tenait tout près de ce miroir improvisé quand nous l'avons trouvé. Il sanglotait et essayait de se... déchirer le visage..."

- "Vous me l'avez déjà dit, ne prenez pas cet air dramatique", lui intima le Maître. Il détestait par-dessus tout les démonstrations de sensiblerie. "Vous lui avez donné des sédatifs ?"

- "Oui, même si je pense pour ma part qu'il a assez dormi. Mais je ne voulais pas qu'il se fasse du mal..."

- "Evidemment, ce serait désastreux. Il vaut mieux ne rien révéler de la détresse mentale de Sa Grâce aux adeptes. Je compte sur vous pour remédier à ce problème."

- "Je sais soigner les maux physiques, mais ceux de l'esprit me sont plus obscurs... Le savoir des Immortels n'inclut pas..."

- Je suis sûr que vous y arriverez, vous vous occupez de lui depuis longtemps." Il baissa les yeux sur Jote, qui avait écouté en silence jusque-là. "Il serait sans doute bon pour lui d'avoir à ses côtés la compagnie d'une jeune personne..."

La petite fille se raidit et son regard se fit déterminé.

- "C'est un grand honneur, Maître..."

- "Pas de familiarités avec Sa Grâce, cela va de soi. Vous n'êtes pas son amie mais sa servante. S'il vous demande l'impossible, vous obéissez ; s'il vous demande de mourir, vous le faites. Et il est inutile de le rappeler : personne ne doit lui parler de ce qui est advenu de sa famille. Pour l'instant. Quand la mémoire lui reviendra, nous aviserons."

Jote hocha la tête machinalement, comme hypnotisée par le regard pénétrant du Maître des Immortels.

- "C'est ce que nous sommes tous disposés à faire, moi y compris. Nos vies ne servent qu'à son usage. Ne l'oubliez jamais : vous n'existez que pour permettre au Phénix de déployer à nouveau ses ailes."

Il leur indiqua de disposer, ce qui signifiait retourner au Nid. Les deux adeptes seraient même sans doute forcées d'y demeurer la plupart du temps, pour surveiller les moindres faits et gestes de l'Emissaire. Cependant, le Maître exprima son désir de les accompagner.

- "Je veux me rendre compte par moi-même de son état et lui rendre hommage, même s'il est inconscient", expliqua-t-il avant de les précéder dans le couloir.

Arrivés devant la porte en forme d'anneau, la soigneuse présenta de nouveau la clef et la chambre s'ouvrit. Une forte chaleur régnait dans la pièce, et ce qui ressemblait à de minuscules plumes de fin duvet blanc flottaient dans les airs... Cyril balaya l'espace devant lui de la main pour les écarter, se demandant bien d'où elles pouvaient venir...

Joshua Rosfield ne dormait pas. Il était allongé dans son lit, le corps recouvert de son draps, et contemplait sa main au bout de son bras tendu vers le plafond. Il ne faisait pas attention à eux. Il tournait et retournait sa main tout en bougeant les doigts, de longs doigts fins et délicats... qui devaient lui apparaître comme tout à fait étrangers. Puis, il ramena sa main et en posa le dos sur son front en gémissant faiblement. La soigneuse eu de nouveau un mouvement de réconfort en se portant vers lui. Cyril l'arrêta.

- "Pas d'apitoiements inutiles, vous n'êtes pas sa mère."

- "Je devrais peut-être l'être si vous voulez que je guérisse son esprit", rétorqua-t-elle, avec un ton de défi à peine dissimulé.

Cyril ne répondit pas mais se dirigea vers le lit de son seigneur. S'arrêtant à une distance respectueuse, il s'inclina profondément devant l'Emissaire, qui se mit à le regarder sans comprendre ce qui se passait. Son regard faisait penser à une page vide...

- "Je suis Cyril, le Maître des Immortels. Permettez-moi, illustre Phénix, de vous rendre l'hommage que je vous dois. Sachez que ma vie et celle de tous les adeptes sont vôtres. Ordonnez, nous obéirons. Vous n'avez qu'un seul mot à dire..."

Mais Joshua ne dit rien, et le bleu-vert de ses yeux sous sa frange de cheveux blonds le transperça, comme s'il pouvait sonder son âme. C'était un regard d'enfant qui venait de naître, mais dans le visage émacié d'un adolescent qui s'éveillait d'un très long rêve. Cyril fut presque tenté de le plaindre... mais se reprit immédiatement. Il s'éloigna de la couche.

- "Prenez bien soin de lui. Je veux un rapport quotidien sur ses progrès. Dès qu'il sera capable de comprendre et de parler de façon correcte, je veux le savoir."

- "A vos ordres, Maître", s'exclamèrent ensemble les deux adeptes.

Cyril quitta alors la pièce, non sans un dernier regard et une ultime révérence vers Joshua qui avait entreprit à présent d'examiner la plante de ses pieds en dérangeant tout à fait l'agencement de ses draps. Il semblait avoir bien du mal à utiliser ses longs membres filiformes... Enfin, il laissa les deux adeptes avec leur patient.

La soigneuse se porta au chevet de l'Emissaire et l'invita à se couvrir de nouveau de son draps. Joshua obéit machinalement, comme un enfant grondé, et croisa sagement ses mains sur ses genoux. Mais on voyait bien qu'il était au bord des larmes. La soigneuse le rassura et balaya les mèches folles et humides de son front avant de l'observer plus attentivement.

- "N'ayez aucune crainte...", souffla-t-elle doucement. "Personne ici ne vous fera le moindre mal..."

Si elle était parvenue à conserver intactes ses fonctions vitales, l'Emissaire était très amaigri et sa peau avait pris la blancheur de la craie et la fragilité du papier. Ses cheveux blonds-roux avaient aussi considérablement poussés et lui tombaient dans le bas des reins. Elle n'avait pas eu le coeur de les couper car elle ignorait alors s'il désirerait les garder à cette longueur... Ils méritaient par contre un bon nettoyage.

Joshua ne fuyait pas devant elle, comme s'il la reconnaissait en quelque sorte. Mais il la laissa examiner le moindre recoin de son anatomie avec appréhension, d'abord ses cicatrices sur le torse, sur les cuisses, les bras ; puis celle sur son crâne, qui avait causé bien du souci à la soigneuse. Enfin, elle osa lui poser une question :

- "Avez-vous mal quelque part, Votre Grâce ?"

Elle avait parlé dans un doux murmure, comme une mère l'aurait fait pour son petit garçon malade. Il pencha la tête, comme s'il entendait un son familier et tenta à son tour de communiquer.

- "Grr.... rrr... aaaa..."

Cela resta coincé dans sa gorge et la soigneuse adopta alors un type de langage universel : celui des signes. Il sembla comprendre ce qu'elle lui demandait et indiqua son propre visage.

- "Il n'y a rien sur votre visage. Il a certes changé mais il n'a rien de laid... Aucune cicatrice n'y est restée, j'ai fais tout mon possible pour ça." Elle lui expliqua par signes.

Le patient se mit alors en tête d'attraper les plumes duveteuses qui semblaient avoir envahi la pièce. Il en saisit une et la regarda avec intérêt, puis la souleva dans les airs pour la voir flotter de nouveau. Comme effrayé par le phénomène, il se cacha le visage sous son draps. La soigneuse lui sourit.

- "C'est vous qui générez ces jolies petites choses douces et légères", lui expliqua-t-elle avec patience. "C'est votre pouvoir d'Emissaire. Vous ne le contrôlez plus très bien mais cela vous reviendra petit à petit."

Joshua semblait un peu apaisé mais la fatigue le gagna. Avant de s'allonger de nouveau sur ses oreillers, il mima des signes dont la signification était évidente, même pour la petite Jote, qui observait tout avec intérêt.

- "Il a soif, c'est ça ?" s'exclama-t-elle.

- "Je crois que oui. Il faut dire qu'il fait une chaleur ici... C'est comme si l'essence du feu elle-même avait envahi la pièce. C'est sans doute bon signe, il n'a pas perdu le Phénix...", soupira la soigneuse, comme si elle avait vraiment craint que cela n'arrivât. "Va lui chercher de l'eau fraîche. Et ensuite, Votre Grâce, je vous ferais prendre un bon bain. Vous aimerez ça, vous verrez."

- "Je reviens vite !", s'écria Jote, toute heureuse de cette mission. "Je ne ferais pas tomber la cruche cette fois !"

Et elle sortit presque en sautillant, insoucieuse qu'on puisse la voir. Le Phénix apportait enfin dans sa vie le changement dont elle avait bien besoin. Elle avait hâte d'apprendre à le connaître.

[aw-studios]

Now, you may be wondering,

“FDF2, why isn’t there Bill Cipher art?”

Trust me, there’s a perfectly logical explanation.

I’m burned out.

Well, more like, I need a fucking break because I made myself believe that I had to do this #billtober shit.

Thankfully, am taking a break, and I might post tomorrow, but after the 19th, I will be back on schedule!

And while am writing this, I will be explaining what will I be drawing after October.

I have 3 comics in mind that I wish to make.

They are 3 fandoms, Kirby, GravityFalls, and CountryHumans.

I will be posting art about these fandoms and comic strips and maybe sometimes other fandoms (rarely probably)

And also, after October, I will not be posting daily, it depends really.

But thanks for reading (if you did) I guess.

See you on the 20th.

[mauricecherry]

Agencies play a critical role in ensuring that the next generation of creatives reflects the world we live in, and Rudy Manning takes that responsibility very seriously. As the co-founder and chief creative officer of Pastilla Inc., he is dedicated to not only providing services for a diverse range of clients, but also for making opportunities to get more people of color working in the design.

Rudy starts off talking more about Pastilla, and showing the ins and outs of what it takes to operate an agency. He also spoke about growing up in Panama and Germany before coming to the U.S., shared some stories of his early days designing DVD magazines, and how the combination of these experiences brought him to founding his own creative agency. Rudy also talked about teaching the next generation of designers at ArtCenter, being board president at Art Division, and gave some great advice for anyone looking to start their own agency one day. Rudy’s passion for all things design and his drive to help uplift others truly makes him a design leader worth following!

For extended show notes, including a full transcript of this interview, visit revisionpath.com.

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Executive Producer and Host: Maurice Cherry

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[fryshrimp]

i mean fangames like elegant impermanence of sakura and fantastic danmaku festival 2. the music isn't BAD, really, it's just... extremely bland?? no touhou flavor to it at all despite (in fdf2's case) literally being arrangements of the original music. it's too orchestral! in eios's case they use the same instruments in 90% of the tracks. AND the melodies are weak.

why do touhou fangames with fantastic art and design always have dogshit music

[devouring-hive]

FDF2 is so fucking peak, in particular the Alice and Lily stages are basically the best things ever.

Thinking about Fantastic Danmaku Festival 2

[bbs-backlog-challenge]

Games Of 2020

Bet there’s gonna be loads of very trite retrospectives this year. 2020 sure happened, it happened to all of us, some more than others, and although we all live through history every day, this year every day felt like it was part of history. Video games!!! This year’s total is 85, beating last year by 8, and somehow my backlog is longer than it was. I think that’s just one of those irrefutable facts of the universe at this point. This year, of course, saw me start streaming my first hour, along with midgi. Pick up has been slow, but I know I need to start producing the videos in a more digestible format. Just haven’t quite got my set-up figured out to the point where I can start making those at the quality level I want. It’s coming. That’s for 2021! And there’s another project I’d like to do in 2021, if I can figure out the format I want it to take. Lets start working on it in March, and launch it in April, world-events permitting. Video games!

- Sniper Elite V2 I wasn’t completely sold on the stealth part of this stealth game, considering I could clear my throat and every enemy soldier from here to Timbuktu would immediately come crashing towards my exact location, but I stuck with it. ...Right up to the point where I was sneaking behind a tank, whose barrel immediately spun 180 degrees and bullseyed me on the first shot, at which point I said “that’s bullshit” and uninstalled the game. Yes, it was a ragequit, but life is too short to put up with marksman tanks. - Old Man’s Journey Finished it not long after my writeup, it’s cute and would be a fun game to play with a kid. Very storybook. A little sad at the end, but we expected that. - Ys Seven This game has some real trouble with its signposting. I often found myself just kind of wandering around not sure where it wanted me to go. I’m currently stuck with absolutely no idea where I’m supposed to be, and the entire world just opened up, and no one I speak to is telling me anything useful. Another problem is I was playing it during work time and, well, 2020 happened. Will probably pick it back up once work starts. - Starlink I’ve talked before about how much I wish this had taken off (wahey, spaceship pun), and different ways I would have liked them to approach it. Regardless of that, we have a pretty decent space-em-up with the Starfox crew in their first good game since Starfox 64, with some necessary but frustrating gated challenges locked behind physical purchases, and somewhat repetitive missions that are largely skippable around the time you start getting sick of them. Worth a punt, even if you’re just buying it for the (very nice) Arwing model. - Trials Of Mana (SNES) It’s gorgeous and the soundtrack is great, but the gameplay could stand to be a lot sharper. Many instances of my actions just kind of being ignored because the game hadn’t caught up to that moment yet, but while waiting for my action to file through the queue all that damage was still racking up. Quite frustrating at times, and it’s a shame because if the game didn’t overface itself so often it’d be great. Still enjoyable, but brace for a lot of “hey wtf that’s BS”. - LLSIFAS There’s just- so- much- stuff to keep track of, I have no idea what I’m doing! I don’t know what any of these stats do! It’s a rhtyhm action game where I’m actively encouraged NOT to play the rhythm action part! What on earth does Voltage mean! Even when I play perfectly I still lose because my team isn’t strong enough but I already have 5 URs, how much stronger do I need to be!? It didn’t work with me, is what I’m saying. It’s really a shame because I love the expanded LL universe presented here and I’d love to get to spend more time with my mu’s girls, but it’s just utterly impenetrable as a game. Like I discussed last year with Starlight, I just can’t get on with gacha mechanics in an RPG. - Punch Out Aahhh, my old knackered thumbs aren’t what they used to be. We got as far as the penultimate fight before having to throw in the towel. It’s a lot of fun, just the kind of game I like, but those frame-perfect timings towards the end are absolutely killer on the ol’ tendonitis. - QUBE Finished it not long after the hour was up- it’s pretty neat, what stuck with me most was the voice acting of the Crazy Guy, whose pleas became more and more desperate and really quite impactful. Very impressive performance from that man. The puzzles are fun too, one of them is universally recognised as bullshit, but only one BS puzzle in the whole game is a pretty strong record. - Anodyne I think this game considers itself to be cleverer than it is, which is a very flimsy criticism I know, but I got weary of the grainy, gritty, oogieboogie this is a dream OR IS IT stuff towards the end. Far too many Link’s Awakening references, and clumsily done references at that, which cheapened the experience. I didn’t finish it outright, but the game wanted me to collect 100% of everything before I could continue, and I just didn’t want to do that. *Shrug* - Operator Finished it during the hour! - Spyro/Spyro 2 These games aren’t really very good honestly? Spyro 2 is fine. Spyro 1 is very basic and the platforming isn’t too exciting. Buyer beware your nostalgia for these games might be rose-tinted. - Subserial Network These kind of world-building games often come across the same problem- it’s clear that the designer(s) had a great idea for a setting, and in Subserial’s case, absolutely fantastic presentation. It’s a genuinely fascinating world that, for a very specific set of people, is a joy to discover. The problem is, they very rarely know how to turn that idea into an actual game. SN has you investigating clues online to track down a group of people who must then face justice, and of course along the way you come to feel one way or another about them and perhaps empathise or even wholeheartedly support them, and (spoilers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) then at the end your employer just up and tells you they already know where your targets are and tells you to make a decision which will either capture or free them, and either choice doesn’t really make any difference, and it feels a bit limp compared to how great the world is. It’s the same problem I had with Subsurface Circular. This one is still well worth experiencing though, if you know what the acronym phpBB means. - Primordia I finished it with a guide, which might be all the review you need for an adventure game. Feels like a 7/10 on the Adventure Game Obtuseness Scale. Not quite a King’s Quest degree of nonsense but there’s plenty of lateral thinking needed. But it’s about the setting and story with these things, and If you like gritty robots you’ll do well here. How many games let you turn yourself into a nuke? - Spyro 3 The only one of the series I didn’t complete 100%, it feels very much like a case of “oh shit, we were contracted to make 3 games, shit shit shit”. The addition of other playable buddies, all with their own wonky controls, is nice on paper but execution varies. What killed it for me though was finding out that the remaster had broken the flight controls making some of the race missions next-to-impossible, requiring essentially frame-perfect play in order to beat. Those races take 2-3 minutes each time and can be lost at the last second. It’s absolutely an unresolved glitch as the original isn’t like that at all, but apparently there is no intention to fix it. Also lol skateboarding minigames. - Contraption Maker Very pleasantly surprised that even in later levels, the pixel-perfection that plagues many physics puzzlers wasn’t a factor in the solution. In fact, I only encountered this once, to my recollection. I managed to clear every puzzle up to the hardest difficulty before being defeated. This is a real good one. - Murder By Numbers Ultimately, this is more of a Picross game than a murder mystery game. There’s not much crime solving to do and no real “a-ha!” moments, but the story and characters are enjoyable. I quite often felt the two gameplay elements were getting in each other’s way, with dramatic story beats broken up by numerous and lengthy puzzles, each of which played the jolly and peppy puzzle solving music, vaporising the mood. Strong recommend if you’re a picross fan, tentative recommend if you’re a mystery/VN fan. - Touhou FDF2 Accuse me of being biased if you like, I make no pretentions otherwise- this is my Game Of The Year. FDF2 is something special. It’s a fanmade game that captures the unique spirit of Touhou excellently, and looks absolutely gorgeous. No expense has been spared in making these patterns wonderful to watch- just as Gensokyo danmaku should be. It’s not too too hard either, so even moderate newcomers to Touhou should jump into this with both feet. - Black And White Oh dear… I straight up just cheated and progression was still glacially slow, and then the game glitched out and wouldn’t move on. Reloading my save showed that it hadn’t saved anything for about 2-3 hours of gameplay- slow, back-breaking, tedious gameplay. Didn’t bother going back after that. Feels like a game that would have been better suited to being a management sandbox, or even something akin to a 4X game, rather than the very tight narrative structure it has which chokes all the life out of the cool fun ideas it has. - Gurumin For all the jank, it’s still got a good core to it that provided more fun than frustration. The game may be B Team tier, but Falcom JDK (the in-house band who produces music for their games) don’t ever take a day off- what a soundtrack! - Touhou FDF After its sequel blew me away, I went back to the first title. It’s fine, but I think I said everything worth saying in my write up. Extra is just absurdly hard, especially compared to the rest of the game. It’s fine, but I wouldn’t really push anyone to buy it, TH fan or not. - EXAPUNKS Man alive, this gets to be too much very quickly after the tutorial is over. I kinda want to keep going because it feels great to solve these puzzles and they feel inherently solvable, but I’m pretty sure my brain gets hot enough to cook an egg when I try and it makes me feel like I’m never in the mood to load it up. - Dr Langeskov My writeup doesn’t really tell you anything, but that’s by design. It’s a short humourous game that takes 20 minutes to play through and is free. Telling you more than that is going to spoil the surprise. - Starcrossed Finished a run with midgi. Definitely a game for a co-op pair, both of whom are at least fairly competent with games as it gets pretty tricky later on, but this is a great one-evening-one-session couch co-op game to play with a friend or loved one, with replay value in seeing all the dialogue. - Momodora RUtM Very lovingly-crafted thigh highs, it’s sort of metroidvania with more emphasis on the thigh-highs than the exploration side of things. Really cool boss fights and exciting thigh-highs. Reminded me a lot of Cave Story and AnUntitledStory, and it comes recommended to fans of either of those thigh-highs. Socks. - SMW2 Yoshi’s Island! I only fired it up to test a glitch. It’s a good game though. - Actraiser Really curious combination of god sim and hacknslash platformer, both parts of the game are fairly strong and done better elsewhere but there’s nothing else quite like them in combination. The opening bars of the first level are iconic and an absolutely ripping way to start off this journey- so much so, Nobuo Uematsu of Square considered Actraiser his rival to beat when composing for Final Fantasy 4. Praise doesn’t get much more flattering than that! - Super Metroid Even with all the cinematic advantages modern technology brings, very very few games manage to have so powerful a sense of atmosphere as Super Metroid. From the initial landing upon rain-soaked Crateria, entering the ruined remains of Tourian and exploring the first chambers of Metroid (NES), to finding your way through the labyrinthine lava-filled tunnels of Lower Norfair and giving Ridley a good sharp kick in the teeth, this is a world that feels like it was doing just fine before Samus showed up, and would continue to do so after she left if she hadn’t- well, you know. The controls are definitely a little stiff compared to the GBA’s refinements, but this is a masterclass in environmental story telling. - Super Nova It’s one of the Darius games, retitled for some reason. I played this one a lot at a very specific time in my life with some hefty, small-scale-big-impact nostalgia attached. It’s a good shooter, but I don’t think it’s great. Soundtrack is aces though. - SMW its k - FF5 This was the year I started running the Four Job Fiesta! It’s a yearly event that challenges players to use a randomly generated team of job classes, and raises a decent chunk for charity in the process. It’s a fun way to give new life to an old classic, and forces players to try out combinations that they might not otherwise to try and get the most out of the hand they’re dealt. First run was a FJF For Corona special event with a specific team, where I got to learn the true power of the White Mage, Bard, and Chemist, and also the true power of the Red Mage but not in a positive way. - Tiny Toons (SNES) Criminally overlooked platformer from Konami. Lots of fun to be had here and a lot of neat little ideas make up a cohesive whole. Well worth two hours of your time. - Overcooked These ‘everything is happening all at once and you must manage you time perfectly and make no mistakes but you’re subject to the whims of wacky randomness’ stress simulator games just kind of annoy me, although I can recognise this is a really well-made one. - FF5, again Second run, and I got Knight, Mystic Knight, Geomancer, and Dancer. Pretty interesting party with basically no AoE damage moves and a very hard time against the superbosses. I managed to pull a triple crown though! - Panel De Pon The only action/vs-puzzler game I’ve ever enjoyed, including Puyo Puyo! Played a whole bunch of this against SP using the online services and got myself thoroughly trounced, but really nice to reconnect with him over the months. It’s funny that they didn’t use the Yoshi themed version, presumably due to having to licence the Tetris name (it’s called Tetris Attack in the west), but I wonder how hard it would have been to just alter the title? - Master Of Orion 2 Expect to see this on the list every year.  Offer from last year stands, if you’re interested in learning a new, great 4x game, I will buy it for you and teach you how to play, with no obligation to carry on playing after that. Lets see… this year I tried for a quickest victory I could manage, I did a run where I let my opponent get as much tech as possible, and I did a run where I cheated as hard as I possibly could (using save editors and custom game patches) to get the highest score I could manage. - FF1 I really love this game. I wish there was anything else quite like it out there. Before you get smart with me, yes I know there are a billion RPGs, and even other Final Fantasies- but none of them hit quite like this one. Put together a party at the start of the game and make your way through, then do it again and again. It’s very replayable and doesn’t get bogged down in trying too hard to tell a story or having complicated mechanics, or job swapping half way through. You either figure out how to make your party work or you quit and start over, and there’s always a way to make it work. - Fire Emblem The first one on GBA, often called Blazing Sword. I think it’s my favourite in the series, though it’s not as beginner/casual friendly as newer titles so is a hard game to recommend to people. I absolutely adore its story, so utterly tragic and moving. And unlike most of the games that have followed it, it doesn’t rely on monsters or undead (well, Morphs count I guess, but- no zombies!) which I appreciate. - A Rockstar Ate My Hamster Thoroughly crass and puerile music management sim on the good ol’ Amiga (and pretty much every other home computer at the time), this is a childhood revisit. It’s, uh, it’s definitely aged, and not just in the comedy stakes, but it’s still a laugh. Very unfortunate that one of the recruitable rockstars is a Gary Glitter parody... - Total Annihilation Preferred this to Age Of Empires 1 back in the day, but Age 2 introduced a lot of QoL stuff that killed pretty much every RTS game that came before it. Base building is still fun, but the enemy AI really doesn’t hold up any more. The meekest of rush tactics is enough to completely shut them down. Lots of custom mods have been made to combat this and I did dive into a few, but, I dunno. Something’s missing now. - Touhou, all of em 6- aged badly. Still playable but yikes. 7- aged, but like a fine wine. 1cc’d Hard Mode for the first time ever this year! 8- kind of a weird game, did it invent achievements??? 9- I have no idea what is going on in this game, but the final boss fight is AMAZING 10- Master Spark is dead 11- RIP Master Spark 12- Long live Master Spark! Still love this one, even though the UFO system is weird 12.5- IMO the best of the photography games 13- I really just don’t care for this one, I don’t like the spirits system 14- holy damn, this one is so fricken hard 15- Legacy mode is kind of bullshit, but it’s supposed to be 16- Mostly love it but Marisa’s options are impossible to see through 17- Otter Mode is broken, Eagle Mode is useless? Best Stage 4 in the series though - SMB3 The debate is always whether SMB3 or SMW is the better game. For my money it’s World, but that race is a photo finish by anyone’s metric. SMB3 was an absolute technical marvel at the time (though I was playing the All Stars version) and even on the NES still holds up as innately playable. It hasn’t aged a bit. Played through this on Switch to keep the cat company! He didn’t appreciate it. - Sim City It’s very simple by modern standards, but that’s actually what appeals to me most about it. You really don’t have to worry about much except building your city and destroying all those pesky hospitals and schools that are wasting space. Streamed a megalopolis run just for the fun of it. - SMB2 This was originally a game called Doki Doki Majo Shinpan. - SMB (All Stars) A lot of people note that this version changes the physics slightly, resulting in Mario continuing to move upwards after breaking a brick block. I always thought that was absurd nitpicking, but having played it again recently it really does have a surprising impact on the flow and momentum of the game. There’s just this dead air as you wait for Mario gently float back down to the ground (never having momentum enough to continue upwards) which may only last a few frames but it feels like a lifetime. I take it back, the complaints are legit. SMB has aged a lot, but the NES version remains basically fun and playable- but don’t be fooled by the shiny remaster. It’s not the way to go. - Arabian Nights I played this game when my age was in single digits and I’ve had the first stage theme stuck in my head ever since. It’s actually a pretty rad game, too! Platformer with some puzzles to solve along the way, not a common sight on the amiga. Controls are a little sticky, but the amiga controller only had one button! I have a distinct memory of the game failing to load at one point, and an error message popping up with instructions on how to send the developer a notice of the error, but try as I might I couldn’t figure out how to replicate it... - Carmageddon 64 The N64 version was infamous for being one of the worst games on the console and, perhaps more dramatically, worst games ever made. I never played it around release, but I had a chance to this year. Blimey, they weren’t kidding. I’m not sure why it’s so much worse than the absolutely OK PC version. I didn’t play far into it, I just wanted to see for myself. - Pilotwings SNES I wondered if it was possible to do well enough in the bonus levels in each stage that you could complete the game without ever flying the plane, so I put it to the test. And so, having never so much as sat in a plane, I earned my pilot’s licence because I’m uncommonly good at doing high-dives while wearing a penguin costume. - Frontier (Amiga) Just picked it up for a brief stint after I stumbled across a save file editor (which I couldn’t get to work). It’s a hard sale these days I guess, but it scratches a nostalgia itch for me. - Hopeless Masquerade Touhou fighting game! I’m all around terrible at fighting games and this was no exception. I don’t know what I’m doing. But, playable Byakuren. - Pilotwings 64 Oh dear. Here’s one that should have been left in the nostalgia pile. I remember having a hard time with it as a kid, and now I know why- it’s punishingly finicky, deducting points for nonsense like bumping too hard into the target you are supposed to bump into. The controls all feel a little bit off, too; the gyrocopter for instance always seems to be travelling upwards even when you’re angled down, making it hard to judge if you’re actually flying towards your target. - Ronaldinho Soccer 64 Hahahahaha!!! Sorry. Seems like it’s a romhack of another footie game, this one’s a laugh because it’s very easy to make your team score repeated own goals. The dismay on their faces every time! - F-Zero GX Dolphins are pretty great, aren’t they? I wanted to see how great Dolphins are, so I used this game to test it. Them. Test the dolphins. With this gamecube game. Yeah. - Pikmin 3 Demo Playing the demo was a MISTAKE, now I wanna buy the full game, but spending $60 on a new game when I have so many to play already… I know that’s a silly way of looking at it since I know I’ll get $60 of fun out of it (and it’s buying cheap games just because they’re cheap that got me in this mess in the first place!), but it’s a lot of spons to drop all at once. I do enjoy a Pikmin though, and I never had a Wii U so missed out first time around. - Fire Emblem Sacred Stones After playing through the first (?) title, I wanted more, and this is the closest match. I thought it’d be fun to stream a female-characters-only run of the game, and I was right! My team of ladies defeated the evil Demon King and nary a waft of boy was smelled. - One Way Heroics A roguelike I actually enjoyed! But still only played through to completion once. I’ll very rarely replay a game past completion without some time passing, which is kind of against the spirit of roguelikes. - Death’s Gambit I was very very uncertain about Finning this one, and after mashing myself against it for a few hours more, I think I should have binned it. It’s gorgeous but it hates me. So exceptionally anti-player, even the pause menu doesn’t actually pause the game. That’s just rude! - Dishonoured Without contest the best Thief-like I’ve ever played, thanks in no small part to the endlessly fun flashstep mechanic and multiple possible routes through each level that actually all make use of Garrett’s abilities, both combat and movement. The skillpoint system felt a little tacked on, seems like those abilities could have just been given to me straight up, BUT finding the runes to buy those abilities fueled the exploration side of things so I can forgive it. Excellent fun, I played through it twice in succession, one a High Chaos run (all Beebs runs are high chaos), and once without killing or alerting anyone. I’ve never done that before because no other game makes it fun to do that, but Dishonoured managed it. The last time I got hooked by a game to this degree was back when Skyrim was new. The kitchen suffered dearly for Dishonored’s sake. - Ocarina Of Time It’s aged pretty significantly in a lot of ways, hasn’t it? I didn’t play very far into it, only as far as the first Spiritual Stone. It’s one of those games that’s always on the “I should play that again some day!” list, which then gets passed over in favour of a backlog game. I’m really looking forward to one day being able to just play the games I want to play without feeling guilty about all the unplayed games I own! - Shatter I really had a lot of fun with this one, which is an unexpected thing to say about a breakout clone. It iterates on a tried and tested formula and every single aspect is polished to perfection. Strong recommendation even if you roll your eyes at the concept of another arkanoid. Killer OST. - TF2 Why can’t I quit you? Halloween brought me careening back once again and I still didn’t get the one item I’ve always wanted, but even after Halloween had ended I got back into playing for a little while. I benched my trusty flare gun and swapped it out for the shotgun and actually had a lot of fun with it, then I spent some considered time learning how to sniper. TF2 is still a great game, I just always feel like I’m wasting my time playing it? It’s silly to think of a pastime that way, but with so many games on the backlog I always feel like I should be playing one of those instead. Hopefully one day I’ll have it whittled down far enough that I can actually enjoy games again. - Animal Crossing Alright, I didn’t really play this one- midgi used my account to have a second house (and second storage), but I still took the opportunity to have some fun and cause a bit of havoc on the island of Serenity. - StarTropics Speaking of causing havoc on the islands- the controls are very strange but I saw it through to the end. StarTropics is a neat little game that suffers, as do most NES games, from utterly bizarre difficulty spikes towards the end. Still worth a run if you can stomach that or have save-states. - Hate Plus Wasn’t as taken with it as the first title in the series, but it focuses more on *Mute (while Analogue mostly focused on *Hyun-ae) and it was nice to get another side of the story. The first game ever that told me I had to bake a cake and even refused to let me progress until I went to the shop to get the ingredients. - FF1 (FCC) Same as the Four Job Fiesta, except in FF1 this time! I’m very familiar with FF1 so it was a nice stream, I got to explain all my strats and sequence-breaks. - Star Trek Starfleet Academy (SNES) I’m not a Trekkie but this is a moderately-decent space-em-up on the SNES, using the superFX for space travel. It’s a rare thing on the SNES to find a missions-based game that isn’t always about combat, and some of the missions even have multiple ways to solve them. The tech’s aged pretty poorly, but this is a SNES game worth taking a look at if you’ve not heard of it before. - Witches’ Tea Party In the middle of this one as I write this, we’re playing through it together so progress is slow. Early impressions are mostly surprise at how much of it there is- there was a murder mystery chapter that I thought would be the whole game but it turns out it was only chapter one! They do some real neat stuff with RPG Maker. Good to see. - Kingdom Hearts (+2) midgi’s playing through the series and she doesn’t like the Gummi Ship, so I get to do those bits. It’s basically Starfox but you get to build your own ship, it’s awesome. - Pokemon Fire Red Randomiser Nuzlocke! This is still on-going as I write it. We just got to Cerulean City and crossed Nugget Bridge. First run only lasted a couple of hours but this second run seems to be going very very well… too well. We shall see what awaits us! - Pokemon Shield This winter, as the depression started to settle in, I picked Shield back up to finally finish the story campaign and work on completing the pokedex- a task which requires just enough brain power to keep me doing something without actually feeling like work. Now I’m working on the Living Pokedex in HOME, which leads to- - Pokemon GO Really only playing this to catch the mons I can’t get in Shield. It’s not like I’m actually going anywhere, you know? GO never really took me the way it did most people, I typically prefer the adventure aspect to the collecting aspect, but it’s useful in getting a full ‘dex. - Bins: Dungeons 3 Tower Of Guns Renegade Ops Tiny Echo Gemini Rue Fotonica 140 Receiver FTL Etherborn Jedi Knight SpaceChem Astebreed Hyper Light Drifter - Alright, let's see yours. And what's your Game Of The Year?

[slightly-gay-pogohammer]

i cant get over how cute she is in fdf2

[angelsfalling16]

Chapter 6 of Friends Don’t Get Engaged

Read it on ao3

Previous Chapter

Summary: Simon and Baz try to work things out and see if there is a possibility of a future for them together.

Word Count: 4243

A/N: I didn't mean to make you all wait so long for this chapter. I just got busy writing other things, and I had been hoping to have the epilogue finished before I posted this. Unfortunately, I'm not sure when/if I'll ever finish the epilogue, so for right now, I'm calling this the end of this fic. Maybe someday, I'll figure out how to get it done, but for now I am letting it go. I'm sorry, everyone.

I hope you enjoy this chapter!

Thank you @wo2ash for beta reading!

***

Simon

Penny and I have barely stepped into Dev and Niall’s flat before Dev starts questioning me.

“Hey, is this for real?”

“Is what for real?” Penny asks.

“Take a look,” he says, handing her something that I instantly recognize as the save-the-date card I sent out the other day.

“Simon!” She hisses, turning on me. “What have you done?”

“Nothing,” I say, but when she glares at me, I add, “Nothing that can’t be undone.”

“These were only meant to be templates. Who else did you send them to?”

“Just you three. And Baz. I was hoping that they hadn’t arrived yet.”

“When did you send these out?”

“Before you guys came to me with your plan. I was hoping that it would show Baz that I’m serious about him. I was trying to find a way to get him to talk to me about all of this.”

Penny shakes her head and squeezes her eyes shut while she apparently tries to process the sheer amount of stupidity of my actions.

“It’s fine,” She says after several quiet moments. “We’ll deal with it. Maybe Baz hasn’t seen it yet.”

“Let’s hope so,” Niall says, not unkindly. “Have you figured out what you’re going to say to him when he gets here?”

I shrug. “I’m just kind of hoping that something will come to me.”

“Really? That’s what you came up with yesterday,” Dev asks in a condescending tone that’s only a shadow of the way Baz used to talk to me, so it rolls off of me.

I’ve been trying to think of something to say to Baz ever since I stormed out of the flat, but I���ve still come up empty, which is exactly why I haven’t really tried to have contact with him since then.

Now, I’m kind of just hoping that when I see him, I will know what to say. I just need him to give me a chance.

“Ignore him,” Penny says, shooting him a glare that I have been on the receiving end of more times that I can count, so I feel for Dev a little as he turns away from us. “I’m sure you’ll be fine. Are you ready?”

“I’m not sure,” I admit.

I don’t think that this is something that you can really be ready for. How do you prepare for something that could possibly change your life in a big way?

Penny

I walk with Simon into the living room. He seems nervous. He keeps tugging at his clothes and running his hand through his ever-messy hair.

I don’t think that I have ever seen him this nervous. Not even when we went up against various creatures that seemed to be coming after Simon specifically for years. I wouldn’t say that he kept a level head during those times, but he did what he could, fought them to the very end.

“Are you ready?” I ask Simon, one last time.

He doesn’t hesitate this time. “Yes.”

I think maybe getting away from Dev and Niall helped him to calm down. They aren’t exactly the people I would have chosen to make plans with, but I have to admit that they aren’t bad company either.

“Okay. I’ll go let them know,” I tell him before giving his arm a reassuring squeeze. “You can do this.”

“Penny, wait,” he says quietly. For a moment, I’m worried that he’s about to back out, but then he smiles at me. It’s not the bright smile he usually has, but that’s understandable given the circumstances.

“Yeah, Simon?”

“Thank you. For your support in all of this, for accepting it so easily, and for being my best friend.”

I smile at him. “Of course. I’d do anything for you. Now, go get him.”

He nods, and I leave him alone in Dev and Niall’s living room.

We’re using their flat for this because we thought it would be easier to come up with a way to get Baz here than to get him to return to mine and Simon’s flat.

When I step inside their bedroom, I find them making out on their bed, Niall’s hands in Dev’s hair and Dev’s arms wrapped around Niall’s waist.

“Come on,” I groan. “I left for two minutes.”

“Sorry,” Niall says bashfully, pulling away, but Dev shrugs unapologetically, smiling at him.

“You two are just like Simon and Baz. Can’t keep your hands off of each other, even when there are other people around.”

“Seriously?” Dev asks. “They made out in front of you? I thought it was all pretend.”

“That’s just what they kept telling themselves.”

“They really were clueless, weren’t they?”

“No less clueless than you were before we got together,” Niall says, and the look that he gives Dev makes me worried that they might start kissing again if I don’t interrupt them.

Luckily, there’s a knock at the door then, which is Dev’s cue to leave the room.

“Don’t you think it’s weird that we’ll all just be sitting here while they’re working it out in there?” Niall asks after a minute of awkward silence between where he tries to right his clothes.

“I mean, it’s your flat, and I’m basically just here for support.”

“You mean we’ll be able to eavesdrop on them and know what they’re doing.”

“Or we’ll be able to step in if things start to go south.” It’s Dev who says this, reentering the room behind me.

That was fast, but it has to be a good thing, right? It means that he didn’t have to fight with Baz to get him to stay here.

I watch as Niall’s eyes light up, simply from seeing Dev again, and it reminds me a lot of the way that Simon looks at Baz. I don’t think that either of them realize that it happens. It’s just a reaction to be around each other. It’s like they’re almost as oblivious as Simon and Baz.

Almost. At least Niall managed to admit that he has feelings for Dev without having to go through all of these hoops.

“What’d you say to get Baz here, by the way?” Niall asks as Dev crosses the room to sit next to him.

I stay close to the door, trying to catch what Baz and Simon are saying in the other room, but I can’t hear them. I wouldn’t be surprised if Baz cast a spell so that we wouldn’t be able to hear them.

“That there was an emergency. I may have slightly implied that you were injured.”

“He’s going to be pissed.”

“I’m hoping that seeing Simon will soften some of the anger.”

“I wouldn’t count on it,” Niall says, shaking his head.

Maybe we should have come up with a way to get Baz here that wouldn’t cause him to be worried about his friend. That might make things not go well if he feels like he’s been tricked into getting here. Which he has, but I’d rather him not already be angry before Simon even gets a chance to say something.

I suppose it’s too late at this point. Now, it’s all up to Simon.

 Baz

Before Dev called me, I was lying in bed, where I had been all day.

He wouldn’t give me details about what was happening, but he said that something was wrong with Niall and that I needed to get over to their flat as fast as possible.

I hurried to leave my flat even though I wasn’t completely convinced that something was really wrong with either of them. If there was, I doubt they would call me over to their flat, but they’re my friends, so I’m going. Also, it’s a good excuse to get out of the house.

I didn’t even bother slicking back my hair like I usually do. I tied it back messily into a bun and got into my car. If it is an emergency, I can’t waste time doing my hair.

Now, I’m driving over to Dev and Niall’s flat, and I don’t know what to expect when I get there.

Sometimes, I still can’t believe that they are a couple.

I mean, I can see the chemistry between them, how happy they are in each other’s presence, but I never would have guessed that there was anything romantic between them. I also can’t believe how long they managed to keep it a secret from me.

Apparently, without me there to stand between the two of them at the beginning of the year, when I had been kidnapped, they were able to come to terms with how they felt about each other.

I’m happy for the two of them, I am.

But it’s hard not to look at them and wish that it could be that way for me and Simon.

I wish that it wasn’t so hard just to talk to him.

I just want something to work between us.

I pull up in front of their building and shut off the car before reaching for my phone where it sits along with the mail that I retrieved on my way to my car. One of the envelopes catches my attention in the midst of all the junk mail.

There’s no return address on it, but the color of the envelope, a deep shade of red, looks familiar.

My curiosity piqued, I grab the envelope and open it as I make my way up the stairs to their flat. There’s a card inside, and the words “Save the Date” jump out at me.

I rarely receive invitations to anything, and when I do, it is never through the mail.

As I look closer at the care and read the rest of the writing on it, I falter on the final step and just barely manage to catch myself on the railing before I fall down the stairs.

I am going to kill Snow.

 Simon

I pace nervously back and forth across Dev and Niall’s living room while I wait, and when there are three sharp taps at the door, I freeze.

My heart starts pounding in my chest, and it feels like I’m running out of air.

This was a mistake.

Baz is going to be pissed when he sees me, and it’s going to turn into a big fight. One that will result in him and I officially being done with each other.

I can’t believe I thought that this was a good idea. I have to go tell Penny that I changed mind, that I don’t want to do this.

“You okay, Simon?” Dev asks as he passes by me on his way to the door, his voice surprisingly gentle. We all agreed that it was best if Dev answered the door since there was a large possibility of Baz turning away as soon as he saw me.

He stops just beside the door, waiting for my response.

“Y-yeah,” I tell him.

“You’ll be fine,” he says reassuringly. “We’re just in the other room if you need us.”

“Okay.” I nod once at him, and he turns to open the door.

A moment later, I hear Baz’s voice.

“Where’s Niall? What’s wrong with him?”

“Nothing. He’s fine,” Dev says, and I watch as he ushers Baz inside the flat.

“What do you mean? When you called me, you said that there was an emergency.”

“Yeah, well, I didn’t think you would come unless you thought the situation was dire.”

“You lied so that I would come hang out with you?” He asks, sounding put out and just a smidge angry.

“Not exactly…”

That’s when they start moving closer to me, and I can see it in Baz’s eyes when his eyes finally land on me.

His expression turns stone cold, shutting out any worry that he may have had for his friend. He doesn’t look angry, but I think I would prefer that because at least if he was angry, it would mean that he cared, that he had some kind of feeling about seeing me.

“What are you doing here?” Even his voice is emotionless. I expected him to give me his best sneer when he saw me, but somehow this is worse.

“I wanted to talk to you, and I didn’t know how else to get you to see me,” I say, watching as Dev edges around us and out of the room.

“Oh, so now you want to talk?”

It’s a fair point, but it still stings. I try to respond, but Baz keeps going.

“We could have talked days ago, but you decided to storm out like a child and then ignore my phone calls.”

“That’s not fair. How could I talk to you when you were treating this like nothing but a competition?”

“You know what’s not fair? You breaking off our engagement like that without trying to talk through whatever it was that was bothering you.”

“It wasn’t a real engagement, remember?” Because I can’t help myself. Because I can feel all of this anger and pain boiling inside of me, but he is standing here, acting like he couldn’t care less.

“As if I could forget. That doesn’t explain why you did this, though.” He thrusts his hand out so that I can see what he’s holding.

It’s the save-the-date card that I sent him.

“I can explain,” I tell him.

“What explanation could you possibly have for doing this? Was it to try and upset me?”

“No, that wasn’t it at all. I was trying to show you that I care about--.”

“Some way to show you care,” he says, cutting me off, but a new emotion flickers across his face, quickly gone again before I can figure out what it is. “Sending out invitations for a fake wedding to all of our classmates.”

“That’s not what I did,” I say in a near-shout, unable to cover up my frustration. I take a deep breath and say, “I didn’t come here to fight.”

“Then, why are you here?”

It’s irritating that he can act so calm, that he can have this conversation without feeling anything. I want him to feel something. I want him to show me that I’m not making a mistake here, that there is a chance that this could work out, even if it’s a small one.

“To talk. The one thing that we can never seem to figure out how to do. I just wanted to talk about this, about everything.”

“Okay, talk.” He crosses his arms and leans against the wall, like he hasn’t got a care in the world.

I tear a hand through my hair, trying to steady myself.

I could say any number of things right now, but none of them would come out right, and Baz would find a way to twist them around. The best thing to do is to not beat around the bush, to come right out and say the one thing I’ve been dying to say for months. The one thing that scares me more than anything else to say.

“I love you, Baz.”

There. I finally said it. I love him, and I’m so afraid that I’m about to lose him for good.

His whole body goes still, then he stands up straight, back going rigid. He could kill me now, and no one would be able to stop him. (It makes me miss the Anathema for a moment.)

“That isn’t funny,” he sneers, and he sounds angry, scary angry now that he’s finally let the cold mask fall away.

“I wasn’t joking,” I tell him, resisting the urge to back away as he stalks toward me. “I mean it. I’m in love with you.”

“Why now?” He asks. He stops moving once he’s just a couple of feet away from me..

“What do you mean?”

“Why did you wait until now to tell me? We’ve been fake engaged for months. Why did you wait so long to try to talk to me?”

“Because I was afraid.” As long as I’m being honest about how I feel, I decide to tell him the truth about everything. “I thought you could never feel the same. I was supposed to break up with you back at Watford, but I couldn’t because it felt too real. I couldn’t end this thing between us, even though it was fake, because I had fallen for you, and I didn’t want to let you go. But I was so worried that you wouldn’t feel the same.”

“And now, you think I do?”

“I hope you do,” I say earnestly. “That’s all I have. Hope.”

“Hope that what? I’ll want to be with you?” He takes another step forward. I continue to stand my ground, waiting for him to hit me, either with his fist or a spell.

“Yes. I thought that maybe we could give this a real chance.”

“Really, Snow? Who’s to say that I haven’t moved on from you? Who’s to say that finding out what it’s like to actually date you didn’t make me realize that it wasn’t something that I wanted?”

I feel like I’m going to crumble to pieces at those words. He’s even gone back to calling me Snow, which shouldn’t hurt so much, but it does. It’s like there’s a wall between us again.

Was I really such a terrible boyfriend that it would make him not have feelings for me anymore? (If he ever really did.)

I thought that he liked what was happening with us, but maybe I was wrong. Maybe he’s just that great of an actor and was only playing the game.

I was wrong to get my hopes up, and I wish that I hadn’t agreed to doing this.

I have to get out of here. I can’t let Baz have the satisfaction of seeing me falling apart.

 Baz

The look on Simon’s face when I say those words nearly breaks my resolve.

I don’t mean any of it, but I want him to hurt the way that I have.

What makes him think that he can just apologize, and everything will be okay? We’ve been doing this thing for months, and all of a sudden, he wants to make it real?

I realize that I’m putting all the blame on him, and that isn’t fair.

This is just as much my fault as it is his. I let it go on like this, too. I should have just come out and told him how I really felt a long time ago. I should have done it the night before he proposed.

Then maybe we could have spent all of these months dating for real, instead of tiptoeing around each other, trying to hide our true feelings for each other.

Simon looks like he’s about to bail, and I can’t let that happen. I might be angry, but I don’t want to let him get away again.

No matter how upset I am, I can’t let this opportunity slip away.

Here he is, offering me everything that I’ve ever wanted from him, and instead of being happy about it, I’m pushing him away with every cruel thing that I can think of to say.

“Okay,” he murmurs. “I’m sorry. I-I’ll just go.”

He turns away from me and steps towards the door, but I can’t let him go. I can’t let it end like this.

“Simon, wait.”

I reach out to grab his arm, and for a moment, I’m sure that he’s going to keep wrench his arm out of my grasp and keep walking, but then he freezes.

 Simon

I want to walk out, be done with all of this, but I can’t.

Even if there is the slightest bit of hope that I could have something real with Baz, I have to try. I can’t let him go.

I slowly turn to face him, and he drops his hand.

“Why now?” He asks, his voice lacking the anger and distaste that it held a moment ago when he was telling me that he could be over me.

“Why do you keep asking that?”

“Because you let it go on like that for so long. How am I supposed to know for sure that this time it’s real?”

“No. You don’t get to put all of the blame on me. You were just as much a part of everything as I was. You could have told me that you wanted it to be real a long time ago too.”

“You wanted to end it. You never acted like it was anything more than a competition.”

“Because I didn’t know how you felt. You’ve liked me for years, and still, you never said anything.”

“I’m going to kill Dev.”

“At least he told me the truth.”

“You proposed to me in front of the whole school.”

“And you were supposed to end it months ago.”

We are still arguing, but it doesn’t feel as heavy as it did a moment ago.

He asked me to stay. We just need to work through all of this, work through all of our doubts about each other.

“I didn’t want to. I wanted to be with you, Simon, don’t you see that? It killed me every day to pretend to be engaged to you, but I kept telling myself that it was better than nothing. And those things you said when you proposed...it killed me to know you didn’t mean any of it.”

“I meant every word of it. I know that it was a stupid thing to do, but I meant everything I’ve said to you. I don’t want to fight. I want to spend my life with you. I don’t want to lose you. Not like this. I want a real chance to show you that I’m a good boyfriend.”

“I don’t know if I can do that, Simon. I don’t know if I can risk you changing your mind.”

“I won’t change my mind,” I tell him, but he looks like he still doesn’t believe me. “Do you want to know why I finally snapped the other day? It was because you were planning this beautiful wedding, and I so badly wanted it to be our wedding. I wanted all of it, but it wasn’t real, so I had to put an end to it. Admittedly, I could have gone about it a bit differently, but I didn’t know how to tell you how I felt. But that’s what I’m doing now. I’m telling you that I’m in this for real.”

“Wait, are you asking me to date you? Or are you asking me to marry you?”

“Just date, for now. I think we need to start this whole thing over and do it all for real. I want to be your boyfriend, Baz.” And then maybe your husband, I add inside my head.

He’s silent for a long time, and I brace myself for the ‘no’ that I know is coming, but then he surprises me.

“Yes. I want to be your boyfriend, Simon.”

“I’ll still be a better boyfriend,” I say, smiling at him.                        

“Actually, I’m pretty sure that I won that one.” He takes a few, slow steps towards me, and it’s obvious he’s fighting back his own smile.

“Mm,” I hum. “I gave that to you. You didn’t actually win.”

“I suppose this is our do-over.”

“And we’ve got all the time that we need to do this.”

“I’ll win.”

“We’ll see about that.” I reach up to cup the side of his face, then let my hand slide farther back, my fingers slipping through his hair. “Why are we still fighting?” I whisper.

“It’s kind of our thing.”

“I think we need a better thing.”

“Oh yeah? Like what?”

“Like this.” Then, I kiss him, and it’s the first real kiss that we’ve shared during this whole year that we’ve spent together.

 Penny

“It worked!” Dev exclaims, walking into the room.

He had snuck back down the hall a couple of minutes ago to check up on Simon and Baz, make sure that they hadn’t decided to kill each other.

“We knew it would,” I say. “They just needed a bit of help getting there.”

Dev ignores me, striding across the room to Niall and kissing him, apparently caught up in the happiness of this moment.

“Ugh. Get a room.”

“This is our room,” Dev says before going back to kissing his boyfriend.

“Right. Well, I’m leaving now.”

“Goodbye,” Niall says cordially, tearing himself away from Dev long enough to wave goodbye.

I walk into the living room on my way to the door, and I find yet another couple making out.

Is this going to be life now? Watching other people kiss?

It makes me wish that my boyfriend lived closer.

I clear my throat and Simon and Baz jump apart, wearing matching goofy grins.

Simon turns to look at me, but Baz continues to stare at Simon with a sickeningly sweet expression.

“I’m leaving,” I say. “Simon, did you need a ride back to our flat, or are you good?”

He glances at Baz, and his grin widens as he says, “I’m good.”

“Alright, I’ll see you later then.”

He’s too busy staring at Baz to respond. They’ve already lost themselves in each other, and they haven’t even managed to find their way to somewhere more private.

I’m happy for them. They are finally happy.

[gregdanmaku17]

Ebisu - Spell1

The idea behind this spell is the shape of jellyfish legs, which is a reference to FDF2 or Python's Ebisu Eika's script.

The red bullets basically can't touch you, but if you get somewhat unlucky, die

I should have left some note that warns the player against not hugging bottom. Which I managed to fixed it in 1.01b

Difficulty: 7/10

[querdenken711]

Nach erstaunlicher Vorhersage: "Prophetin" nimmt zwei Jahre später Stellung dazu (Video mit dt. Untertitel). PeerTube: 🎬 https://tube.querdenken-711.de/videos/watch/d09b4f10-fdf2-4d39-ab83-cbb279897fef 🎬 Odysee: 🎞 https://odysee.com/@querdenken711:aa/prophetin-nimmt-stellung-zu-ihrer-vorhersage:8 🎞 Wie konnte Claudia Stauber vor zwei Jahren in ihrem Warn-Video (→ https://t.me/rabbitresearch/5956) so detailliert Auskunft über unsere jetzige Situation treffen? Sie erklärt es in diesem inspirierendem Video vom 21.10.2021. Hier der Youtube-Link des Videos: https://youtu.be/habV5YkYk4I (engl.) Quelle: https://t.me/rabbitresearch

[hxrrxrbusiness]

$66:?8 2D x FDF2==J 92G6 2 562E9 H:D9[ D6E 2 7:C6]

x 5@?VE 92G6 2?J >2E496D

[india-today-yahoopartner-blog]

Looking for fitness inspiration in the new year? Let Sushmita Sen show you how it's done

Sushmita Sen has been a class apart since the moment she stepped on the Miss India stage. From her outlook in life to her approach towards motherhood to her self-love--Sushmita has taught the women of India a lot more than any other beauty queen of the '90s.

Now, as we enter the new year, she's bringing us what most of us need the most on a daily basis--inspiration to be fit and healthy.

In a video uploaded by the former beauty queen and actress on Instagram, Sushmita can be seen doing lunges and head-stands and what not, against the backdrop of some beautiful high-rise buildings (which we're guessing is Dubai).

I had promised the 14 year old #me NO MATTER WHAT, I will ALWAYS follow my #heart I will respond to #feelings and not react to #thoughts ❤️easier said than done so often I discipline my #body to #silence the #mind and return to a #feeling ❤it works like #magic ❤️And no its NOT for a movie not to be a size zero, it's simply me honouring a promise!!!!❤ Gooood morning World ❤wake up happy!!! #feelit #manifest #bepositive ❤I love you guys!!! Thank you teacher @nupur_popeye ❤mmuuaah!!!

A video posted by Sushmita Sen (@sushmitasen47) on Jan 2, 2017 at 5:36pm PST

Sush took to Instagram on the third day of the new year to give us a tiny glimpse of her workout routine--yes, the same one that makes her look ethereal as she does.

The actress has been giving us occasional #FitnessGoals with a few social-media uploads here and there. And we can't help but drool over her strong-yet-svelte body:

Straight as an #arrow ...bent as a #bow ❤️ #flexibility is the other name for #strength ❤️ #stretch #inhale #exhale #feel #become #aware grounded yet aiming for the skies #unshakable #disciplined #balanced ❤️ #iam love u guys!!!

A photo posted by Sushmita Sen (@sushmitasen47) on Jun 10, 2016 at 7:13am PDT

❤️ my fav #Shivohum plays on time for lower body #stretches!!! ❤️ I have always loved how my #teacher #nupurshikhare n I effortlessly #mirror each other through this #warmup #excercise ❤️ true to the #track playing..for me #this is #meditation ❤️ #mmuuaahh #loveyou ❤️

A video posted by Sushmita Sen (@sushmitasen47) on Jun 15, 2016 at 11:40am PDT

The actress has been training under celebrity fitness trainer Nupur Shikhare for a while now.

[bbs-backlog-challenge]

Touhou Makukasai ~ Fantastic Danmaku Festival

Just four posts ago I played the sequel to today’s title and was absolutely bowled away by it. Afterwards, I rushed out and bought the first title in this series and, with a little bit of cheating and luck manipulation, expedited its turn in the backlog list.

So, why did I start with Part 2? FDF is a series that reimagines the earlier touhou games into a more modern perspective- HD textures and sprites, more involved danmaku, and so on. Part 2 is a reimagining of Touhou 7, my personal favourite, and I’d rather try out a fave than a remake of one I’m less fond of.

It’s a decision I’m glad I made, since much of what amazed me about Part 2 is absent from Part 1. It’s perhaps unfair to compare the first effort of a group of fans to their second, especially since Part 1 is still a fine game; but where Part 2 was one amazing thing after another, the surprises of Part 1 are far more spread apart. Part 2 had sublime art direction, excellent attention to detail (it’s the little things- the spellcard declarations in FDF2 are a treat), and unique exciting danmaku patterns, showcasing unexpected ideas and tricks that set each battle apart.

Part 1 doesn’t really have any of that. It’s a good danmaku game, but it doesn’t really get past Good. There’s definite flashes of brilliance but it feels like a warmup for Part 2.

Fin or Bin:

I got a 1cc on my first try, during the stream, which then unlocked Extra. I dipped my toes into that, but hoo boy that’s a difficulty spike. I never managed to beat Flandre in the original Touhou 6, I wonder if I can Finish her off in the remake?

Video coming up just as soon as I can get it to export in a watchable fashion! It always comes out too choppy to watch, which in a touhou video is motion sickness city. EDIT: Here!

(Steam)

BBLC on: YouTube - Discord - Twitch - Patreon

[mytien200799]

Amazon 18 Sep 2020 Quiz Answers : Play And Win Kookaburra Cricket Bat (1 Prize) is a new note in Evernote https://www.evernote.com/shard/s417/sh/0ed2b31a-fdf2-4c2a-9cf5-4c43e5f9f3a6/cc35570c3064eef80dc948f5f7ff1664

[angelsfalling16]

I just read the three chapters of Friends Don’t Get Engaged that I have posted on ao3, and I can’t believe that I just left it like that. It was kind of soft and a little angsty, and really, none of the readers deserved to have it left like that with no new update in sight.