#fcdnd

[qaraxuanzenith]

FCDnD Session 56

Jinx: Ben has a body Me: Legias and Lori definitely also have bodies. You've seen them. Adam: but have we touched them?

Adam: Huh, it's kind of weird how there are two J names, but only one of them is said. Jenny: I need to talk to Legias. Right now. You can come if you want.

Adanessa: do you have an appointment? Adam: yes Adanessa: name? Adam: you know my name Adanessa: I don't see your name in the appointment book Legias: Oh, good, you're here. come in. Adam, sticking his tongue out at Adanessa: It must suck not having things written down in your little book.

Jenny: Who is Ben? Who is Ben, to you? Legias: Ben is... the King? Of the Castle? That we are... currently in?

Adam: Can I try asking a question? Legias: it looks like you just succeded. Congratulations!

Jenny: Who is J in your journal? What does J stand for? Legias: It's... Jenny: It's me. It has to be me.

Jenny: We need to keep going. I cannot interact with Shard at all. Jinx: Like he can't know you exist? Jenny: He already knows I exist. I can not talk to him. Jinx: What about invisibility? Can I make you invisible when he's around? Adam: What about a mask? Get some face paint out? Jinx: Can we call you Henny Junter? Jenny: It really depends on how easy it is to lie to Shard. If he's talking to me directly, it's already too late.

Jenny: Anything that I know is information that Shard has easier access to. Adam: Well, you're stupid as bricks anyway, so we got this. Jenny: Thanks a lot. Adam: I was trying to be confidence-building.

Adam: a hundred dollars. Legias: No, thank you. Adam: Two hundred dollars. Legias: that's very generous of you, but no. Adam: You've been annoying me a lot lately. Jenny: I think that's just your aversion to authority.

Adam: So we can't let whatever his name is see whatever her name is, and if they do, we lie about it. I'm sure Hunter can't lie worth a damn.

Me: You have now finished your meeting with Legias, for better or for worse. Jinx: I think for worse, honestly.

Jinx: Do you want to say hello to house-builder guy? With the girlfriend sword? Adam: Hector?

Jinx: Do you think Hector was also under an enchantment, or did he just not recognize Jenny? Adam: Honestly, knowing Hector, it's a coin toss.

Adam: hello, you're looking very toady-ish. do you want to trade masks with me?

in which Jenny rolls a 5 on performance to send a non-verbal message, Jinx rolls a 3 on perception to understand it, and Adam rolls a 6 on insight to get what's going on; or: in which the party re-enacts the Good Omens baby switch

Adam: we need to go Jinx: what? She's got it in for her! Adam: she sure does Jinx: yeah, she needs our help! Adam: this is clearly a two-person affair

the (alleged) vampire: please sir, I insist, you must dance with me Jinx: excuse me, I have a girlfriend

Adam: why does being magical make you make bad decisions? Jinx: are you trying to say something? bite me, big girl.

Jenny, repeatedly failing her wisdom save despite the (alleged) vampire grappling Adam: a curious dance step, but I'll allow it

Jinx, investigating a "free drink token": THIS was so important? Adam: I picked her pocket for it Jenny: you STOLE from our HOST?! Adam: what are you gonna do, hit me about it? Jenny: THAT WOULD ALSO BE IMPROPER

Adam: I would not eat the food here. I mean, no offense to the host, I'm sure it tastes lovely, but she did mind control you all a bit. You might want to check for roofies.

Adam: Do we know anyone who hasn't got a will to live? Fern? What if we just send her Fern? Jenny: I think we should try to solve this problem without human sacrifice.

[qaraxuanzenith]

i love this so much and I just gave it to my players

a DnD item that should exist:

the Brown Bag of Plenty

The Brown Bag of Plenty looks like an ordinary brown paper sack lunch. Once per day, a PC may use it to provide a healthy and nutritious lunch to each member of the party. All lunches consist of the following (with substitutions for allergies and other dietary restrictions):

One peanut butter (or other nut butter in case of allergy) and jelly sandwich on wheat bread. Type of jam is randomized, with grape and strawberry most common. Sandwich will be cut diagonally.

One juice box, also randomized.

One bunch green grapes

One packet carrot sticks

One packet crunchy snack food (most commonly potato chips, but flavors are randomized and other types of chips, crackers, veggie puffs, popcorn, etc are also possible)

One packet cookies (most commonly chocolate chip or Oreo-like sandwich cookie)

Eating a lunch from the Brown Bag of Plenty will restore 1d6 hit points for each item consumed. This effect will not take place unless the fresh fruit and vegetables are eaten — i.e., eating the cookies alone will have no effect, but after eating the grapes and carrot sticks 3d6 hit points may be restored.

If the PC enters a body of water within 45 minutes of consuming a lunch from the Brown Bag of Plenty, they will lose 1d6 hit points for each item consumed.

In addition to providing 1 healthy lunch per character per day, the Brown Bag of Plenty will also dispense orange slices (2 per PC) after combat, with the same 1d6 effect as its lunches.

[qaraxuanzenith]

FCDnD Session 58

Adam: "do you want me to go antagonize it? then we can figure out pretty quickly what the response is gonna be"

Adam: "you did do a bit of a war crime with the pit trap"

in which the party summons Shard to play a "let's you and him fight"

uh. in which Shard underestimates an old enemy so badly he falls unconscious.

in which my players straight up kill Shard prematurely with an Acme anvil dropped on his head.

in which Jinx becomes the Castle as I'd always kind of thought he would, but uh. much earlier than expected

Jinx: "Hey, if I ever become evil, kill me." Jenny: "Deal, but I'm confused why that's a risk"

Jinx: "So that didn't quite work out how I expected it to."

Adam: "in my business, we call that killstealing, and it's not really well thought of"

in which Adam tries to persuade Shard's predecessor!demilich to give up evil and become a teacher

Jinx: "I don't want to antagonize Legias just yet"

[qaraxuanzenith]

FCDnD: Session 59

This is it, folks. The finale. The final session. Claude has even delivered baked goods to each of the PCs for tonight's meeting.

Jinx: "so we don't say anything and set up a prank" Adam: "that sounds in-character for me! what else would i do? communicate?"

Adam: hey, i just remembered, I left the oven on. y'all just keep accord-ing

Adam: I thought it would be kind of funny if Shardreach showed up, so you know, haha, how it goes... George: don't i just

Adam: so were you going to get MARRIED or something Ben: I don't remember inviting you to ask personal questions about my personal life Adam: I'm sorry, I'll ask Jenny Adam: I had a get out of jail free card - don't ask me questions - Legias: my only question is why you didn't use it when you were in actual jail Adam: well i was saving it for the one time i'd promised Shard to do anything he asked Legias: you-you-you did WHAT Adam: see, this is why i didn't tell you

Adam: Jenny, what's your wish? are you going to wish to be very good at sex to Ben? Ben: Nah, she's already got that

Jenny: well, i first came here in search of a cure for an incurable illness Adam: whoa, you have an incurable illness too? Jenny: not for me, it was for my mother Adam: dude, I'm pretty sure she's like, already SUPER dead

Jenny: did we solve the Floating Castle by discovering that the true magic was teamwork all along? Ben: that's it, i'm breaking up with you

[qaraxuanzenith]

FCDnD Session 54

I am currently abstaining from twitter, so instead of livetweeting session 54 of FCDnD, my D&D campaign set in the Floating Castle, I will share quotes and observations from tonight's session here.

Adam: Hey, you know the painting? Jinx: The... tapestry? Adam: Yeah, the painting Jinx: The stitched thing??

Jinx has just referenced the invention of busses and public transit

team of 5 horses per bus

Jenny: I... think you just spontaneously created a potion Jinx: stranger things have happened, so... I guess? Adam: I'm gonna drink it. what's the worst that can happen? Jinx: You could become a tennis ball with the intelligence of a tennis ball! Jenny: Worse, you could become a tennis ball with the intelligence of Adam

(Adam drank the potion and turned into sand)

Adam: if I start gently shaking Jinx, will that make the magic happen?

They found the boss monster and have decided to firebomb it from above

Adam: George, I turned into sand! George, looking at Adam covered in sand: I can tell

[qaraxuanzenith]

FCDnD Session 57

Adam: per the terms of my parole, I can't do murder Jinx: none of us are going to tell Legias. and if she's dead, she also can't tell Legias

Jenny, charmed by the vampire: we don't need to hurt her! Jinx: Yeah oka-- WAIT WE DID THIS ALREADY! Not again! *flicks Jenny on the forehead*

Adam: today i found out vampires are real George: nah, vampires aren't real Adam: then what bit me George: could've been anything. could've been a rabid bat. Adam: it shapeshifted into a human and taunted me George: man, bats these days

Jinx & Adam: everything okay? Jenny: ...I don't know. I guess it depends Jinx: well that's not ominous at all

Legias, handing Adam a sweater that still says "property of Legias Swift" on the tag: I noticed that Adam forgot his sweater at the guardhouse so I came to bring it back to you Adam: Wow. Thank you for bringing me my sweater. Which is definitely mine.

Jinx, after analysing Adam's Free Drink Token: be careful with the power of this Adam: I will not be careful with the power of this.

me: the only way you will have combat at that meeting is if one of you decides to throw down Jinx: okay, that means we'll have combat, Adam

[qaraxuanzenith]

FCDnD Session 55

It's time for session 55 of Floating Castle, the D&D game!

Jinx: hey don't tell Adam I asked about this 26: you know I won't talk Adam: what's up? George: we were telling secrets about you. Jinx is a good friend who loves you and wants to help research to help you Jinx: *frantically kicking George* George: what? I never promised to keep quiet

Jinx: It's probably something that will not attack us?

Jenny: I'm at... 77% of my starting HP. so you guys have to kill her in the next 3 rounds. no pressure!

Adam: So, when you drink a potion - no.

Adam: *steals the gems* *hands one to Jinx* Oh look what you just dropped! this fell out of your pocket Jinx: Uh, thanks for returning it Adam: yeah, i wouldn't want to be stealing from the group for months on end without thinking about it

Jenny, having taken about 40 points of damage: i'm fine. this is a scratch. Adam, digging through his bag: i can give you... a fruit?

Adam, upon finding a baby on floor 86: i will be a good father. ...george is going to be very confused

Jenny: the baby seems upset about something. Adam: thanks, i noticed it was crying Jenny: i'm helping! Adam: maybe it's because jinx poked the baby Jenny: yeah jinx, don't poke babies!