#fat gum is a dad

[sylvanfreckles]

Just Fat Gum being a dad to his three boys (and occasionally fighting with Aizawa over them)

Chapter One: Amajiki walks into the office, expecting a routine day of work, only to find an unexpected celebration.

(AKA I had a crappy weekend and needed something cute)

[oukabarsburgblr]

drabble...

"Did-did something happen- mmng- Sousuke-?"

His words could barely escape his mouth, his (s/c) neck relentlessly attacked by the biting and pulling of Sousuke's teeth whose arms were tightly wrapped around his torso.

Both (m/n) and him stumbled into the opening of the empty dojo, Sousuke clumsily kicking the door shut, leaving the open room dim with the noon light shine from underneath the doorways.

"No." He mumbled breathlessly, licking over the bite marks on your shoulder. "Just haven't seen you in a while." Sousuke kissed your ear. "Missed you."

(m/n)'s fingers pulled at the back of the redhead's compression shirt, struggling to keep up with his animalistic pace. His arms the only thing keeping him upright and standing still.

"Aanhh-!" He whined when Sousuke licked at the shell of his ear, biting and sucking his lobe. His face felt hot as well as the warmth at the bottom of his stomach started to burn as well.

(m/n) yelped when he felt his shirt lifted and a hand shoved in his backside, a firm grip on his ass as Sousuke started to lick his way into his mouth while groping his bosom. "S- mmff ungg- stop! Not here- ahnng-!"

The redhead's hand paused at his words, his hazel eyes flickering down to gaze at (e/c), (m/n) panted for a second before uttering. "Not here. I just can't do it here." "...I understand."

It had been a while since the two had last seen each other. Sousuke had a weekend getaway with his family to visit their extended relatives, a weekend turned into a five-day trip. When Sousuke begged his dad to let him go home a day early, he found (m/n) waiting for him as a surprise at the gates of his home.

Immediately, Sousuke dropped his things in his lawn and wrapped his beloved in a kiss that turned into a makeout, that turned into a whole other thing and (m/n) was not prepared to fuck in a garden out of all things. Nor on any parts of the Aito property.

There were still fingers gripping and curling just at the end of the fat of his butt and (m/n)'s hips bucked unconsciously, having his ass unfilled for quite some time and he too longed for intimacy with Aito Sousuke but not in a room where his family ran judo classes at.

Sousuke still didn't release his grip, instead opting to make out heavily with the (h/c), his other hand firm on (m/n)'s jaw, angling his mouth. Both of (m/n)'s hands were still gripping on the back of his shirt, which he found adorable with how he was clinging to his article of clothing.

His tongue mushed against (m/n)'s as he sucked on the wet muscle before he licked his gums, teeth even his palate while grinding his crotch onto the (h/c)'s, moans accompanied the silence in the air.

Just when he pulled away, then did the (h/c) mumbled under his breath. "We can just...do something else." Hazel eyes gleamed before focusing on (m/n)'s. "Like what?" His erection was painfully stretching against his pants.

"Like...something like humping. Yeah, I think. I think we can do that..." (m/n) was rambling, at this point, even he was horny and looking for a reason to ejaculate and as soon as those words were spoken, his shirt was pulled off by an excited redhead.

-

Gasps and moans reverberated in the empty room, courtesy of the (h/c) on his knees, his stomach laid on a short backless bench. His hands gripping the edge of the polished wood, his face hot and sweaty.

Sousuke was behind him, ass grinding up against his as he roughly had bent him over and mounted him to hump him. Both of their pants were still adorned, Sousuke's unzipped and slowly slipping off but (m/n)'s shirt was gone. His (s/c) back exposed and marked by the redhead.

"Annh mmff ungg ohh!" Even with his pants on, Sousuke's large bulge was grinding and humping on his ass, right where he would penetrate him and he was doing it on a relentless pace. "Fuck fuck-!" He gasped, feeling his orgasm climbing as he felt hands sneaking around his chest.

Sousuke pinched and flicked with his nipples, his mouth moaning and sucking on (m/n)'s ears. He stilled when he felt (m/n)'s butt pushing against his crotch roughly, knowing he had creamed in his pants.

"How shameless." He teased the panting (h/c). "I was the one who came onto you but you squirted first." Fangs grazed on the tip of his ears as (m/n) glared at him with his legs trembling. "I asked you to be quick. And what did you do?"

"Sorry." The redhead clicked his tongue, hiding his smirk. "Mistook it with you wanting me to go faster." He shamelessly rolled his hips, making his still erect problem known to the (h/c).

(m/n) frowned, but he could feel his own cock coming back to life in his drenched boxers at the feel of Sousuke's own erection.

"Take off your pants."

-

He was quick to follow orders from the (h/c) and he ended up sitting on the bench, (m/n) still on his knees as he tugged the rest of Sousuke's boxers down. The tip sprang out and slapped against the redhead's lower stomach.

"You better cum..." (m/n) grumbled, meekily grasping the tip with his fingers, his eyes zeroing on the leaking precum. "In your mouth, definitely." The (h/c) slapped Sousuke's inner thigh at his remark as he gently tugged the rest of his base out and guided it to his mouth.

(m/n) hummed in sighing pleasure as his lips enclosed around the tip, his tongue delicately giving kitty licks to the slit. Precum flowed into his mouth, Sousuke had half of his face covered with his hand but there was a clear hue of redness on his cheeks.

"Mmmfff!" Gently, he suckled on the tip, drinking the salty precum before he pushed himself forward, swallowing Sousuke's base, taking it inch by inch. Periodically, gasping for air only to suck the cock in his mouth before finally nestling in between the redhead's thighs, his nose resting on his crotch.

A full length that extended into his throat, his gag reflex under control as he gently bobbed his head up and down, his saliva drooping down his chin and his knees were starting to ache.

He continued to suck and blow off the redhead and when he looked up for a short moment, Sousuke immediately pushed him down and pulled at his hair, fastening his pace and using him like a cocksleeve.

(m/n) was too good at blowjobs, either that or Sousuke was just extra sensitive to his expert touch/tongue and he was shamelessly moaning and enjoying the service he was getting until the (h/c) looked up.

There was something about how (e/c) eyes looked up at him doefully, tears brimming at the edge, his cheeks full and his face nestled right in between his thighs. Fuck that turned him on ten times harder as he grabbed locks of (h/c) to fuck his mouth harder.

Choking on the cock that kept hitting the back of his throat, (m/n) felt his eyes rolled to the back of his head as Sousuke's hips began to move to thrust into his mouth as well and the (h/c) let him use his mouth for him to please himself as he sneakily shoved his own hand down his pants as well.

It wasn't until warm cum poured into his mouth that he was pulled back out of his conscious as he coughed out few spurts of the milky semen. The erection in his pants was still blazing.

Sousuke wiped his chin, kissing the crown of his hair, cooing and praising him. "I love you." He mumbled, running his hand through (m/n)'s hair.

The (h/c) wobbily stood up before sitting across in the redhead's lap, head fuzzy and cock hard still. He leaned in to whisper to Sousuke. "If you get us to your room, I'll ride you like a bull." He bit the shell of the redhead's ear, gently rolling his hips on his thigh.

Sousuke immediately got up, (m/n) in his arms to run to the direction of his room. Thank god his house was still empty, except for the obvious moans and screams of pleasure emitting from the direction of his bedroom.

[END SCENE]

[unedited]

Afterthoughts:

Thought i could hit two birds with one stone with this one. Someone a while back requested dry humping Sousuke and a recent anon requested a blowjob with pent-up sousuke.

Btw he gets a bit chatty when he's frustrated. The same way when he gets involved in a threesome with daisuke. I just finished watching Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter and it was better than what I expected.

Next fic will probably be about Ushijima (september thing is still ongoing. This one is just special for one of the anons)

Taglist:

@tehyunnie @rainnyydaysworld @webwanderer @a-short-ass-disappointment @chikai-k @mello-life25 @miyuuuki @simpsations @sugar-p0p @kiiyoooo @helloanime @garlicforthewin @jaxyy219 @ultkenneth

[as-is-above-so-below]

The Captain - Simon Riley x Sniper!Reader, Wife!Reader

Blurb 2: Too Fast

I'M ALIVE! Thank you all for your patience :) I've had so many big life changes in the last four months (and in the coming months) - it's hard being an adult, people. I've been traveling (mainly visiting @lethalchiralium a bunch <3), planning a big move, looking to land a new job...all the things. Anyway! Please enjoy. Blessed be, and Happy Yuletide!

<< Previous | Next >>

“Si…”

“Hm?”

“He’s getting too big.”

Simon turned his chair slightly away from his desk to peek over his shoulder. In the doorway to their office stood Freyja with a six-month-old Arthur on her arm, clad in a cow-print onesie. The little hood was pulled up over his head, sporting fluffy little ears on top, along with a pair of horns. 

He just about melted when Frey pouted at him and sniffled, rubbing their son’s back. Simon was up in an instant, padding across the carpet to stand by her side, a soft, sympathetic smile gracing his features. He bent his head a little and attempted to get the baby’s attention, gently brushing his back with his fingers “Art. Artie…” he hummed, the last syllable drawn out a bit. “Look at Dada, Art.”

Arthur did eventually turn his head, after a moment, preoccupied with gumming his toy and confused by the interruption. The hood that used to hang over his face and block his vision now sat snug on his fine hair. There was no need to adjust it back to meet his big, curious eyes. 

“Hi, pup.”

Simon wasn’t his preferred parent by any means; that privilege was reserved for his mum. Still, on seeing a familiar face, the baby smiled around his teething ring, and his fat cheeks chubbed up as he cooed and wiggled in Freyja’s hold. He pressed his hand between the two, his palm against Arthur’s chest, and took the infant onto his forearm, his little back against his chest. 

Simon let out a dramatic huff, kissed Art’s head, then patted his belly. “Oh, yeah,” he said, giving his wife a playful look. “Look at those big, manly legs of yours. Thing’s a bit tight on ye, now.”

The baby craned his neck, trying to look back at his dad as he spoke, and quickly getting frustrated and crying out. Simon chuckled and turned him around, supporting his neck and peppering kisses on Art’s rosy cheek. When he was satisfied, he leaned down for a quick kiss from Freyja.

“It lasted longer than I thought it would. He’s nearly busting out of it.”

“Simon!”

“What? He’s six months old, Freyja. He’s been wearing it since he was born. Oversized, might I add.”

“Shut up. It’s my favorite. My little moo cow.” 

“We can buy him a new one.”

“He’s growing too fast. I hate it.”

Don’t I know it?

To Simon, it felt like Artie had only been born yesterday. Where did the baby in front of him, who was sitting up on his own and already using a sign or two, come from? He had no idea, couldn’t say where the time went. God forbid he blinks, and suddenly he’ll be walking and chasing after his sister-

No. It’s fine. That’s what babies do, yeah? They start eating solids, learn to crawl, then walk. Then they go to their first day of primary school, then…secondary…

Stop it.

He settled for a soft, “I know, love.”

Arthur cooed up at him again, a sound known to pull easy smiles from the man. He would listen to it forever, if he could. 

“Yeah? Do you like that idea?” Simon asked, tracing patterns on Art’s back with his fingers again. “Do you want a new cow onesie?” A little smile from Art. “Alright, pup. Dad will get you one.”

taglist: @esthervalea, @miss-leto, @sweetestcowboy, @blueoorchid, @apocalypticseagull, @eatingtheworldsoffanfiction, @covenlovenn, @330bpm-whiplash, @gnoccheyy, @jaggernauticals, @dwkfan, @untoldshortsofthefandomsdoms, @bobfloydsgf, @maviee, @thomaslefteyebrow, @kyovy, @prodyng, @scout-fang, @avalkyrieofparis, @misshoneypaper, @berryjuicyy, @voteforpedropascal, @beakami, @addictedtothefictionalworld, @kaghost, @witchy-writing, @67-angelofthelordme-67, @thychuvaluswife, @mysticalpandabear, @cabreezer0117, @halfmoth-halfman, @peachesofteal, @nirvanaaaonly, @ysljoon, @ssoliva, @fenixyrie, @voodoo-writer, @eleazarkate, @tomhardy41, @glitterypirateduck, @cringeycookies, @captainquake42

Copyright © 2023 as-is-above-so-below. All rights reserved.

[fatkish]

Can you do some headcanons of Fat Gum, Ryuukyu and Sir Nighteye taking custody of a teen reader who is a reformed villian/vigilante.

Fatgum, Ryukyu, and Sir Nighteye x. Reformed Villain/Vigilante Teen Reader

Fatgum:

You grew up among villains since your parents were villains, they never really taught you right from wrong and kinda neglected you

You mostly just stole in order to survive, taking only what you needed and nothing more

One day you stole but got cornered by none other than Suneater, with little to no choice, you used your quirk to phase through him but ran right into Fatgum, literally

You got stuck in his fat but after you passed out, he realized just how skinny you were

He took you to the hospital and was upset to find that not only were you severely underweight and slightly malnourished, but your parents had been arrested leaving you to fend for yourself

He decided that moment that he would take you under his wing, he’d teach you right from wrong and give you whatever you needed to get on the right path

When you woke up and he told you it was either go with him or juvenile detention, you happily chose him

The first thing he did was bring you food and help you get to a healthy weight

Once that was done, he began to help you with learning to live normally and even helped you learn how to make friends at your new school, Shiketsu Academy

As your life began to change and become more normalized, you thanked Fatgum who decided to adopt you since you needed an active and actual parental figure in your life

From that day on you happily accepted your new dad and the two of you became family

You would try to cook all kinds of different foods and you both would try them, sometimes you made a great dish and other times… well, you believed in not wasting food but that ended up with you in the hospital from having food poisoning so…

You began to have a passion for cooking and would become a great chef all thanks to your dad

Ryukyu:

You were an anti-hero. You did what was necessary to keep others safe and would even kill to protect the innocent

You were skilled in combat and were pretty decent with the use of your quirk

One day you cornered a particularly nasty villain and had nearly managed to take them out but suddenly you were both shot at

You saw a couple heroes and tried to escape only to be confronted by Ryukyu

You tried to escape but after Ryukyu decided to transform, your battle was over

Since you technically had yet to kill, but had incredible skill, the HPSC hoped that you could be reformed into a hero

So they decided that you would be placed in the care of Ryukyu

At first, you tried to sneak out only to get caught every time, you’d constantly argue with Ryukyu on morals and rules, saying that some were stupid and that others needed revision

When Ryukyu saw how you viewed society, she discovered that you weren’t necessarily wrong, but you could definitely go about things in a better way

She decided to help you find a better way to make the changes you wanted to make in society but in legal ways only

As you both grew to have a mutual understanding and respect for one another’s views and values, you decided that she wasn’t so bad and accepted her

As that happened, she too, accepted you and you both became extremely close, almost like family

After that, you would go on to become one of the best underground heroes ever

Sir Nighteye:

Reader was an Orphan and a vigilante who used their own gear that they designed to catch criminals

You never used your quirk on criminals since that would be breaking the law and you didn’t want to get in trouble for that

You had created small devices that were a disguised as bugs like dragonflies and butterflies/moths. You made them contain small cameras and have tracking devices in them

These devices would fly around and would be able to attach small trackers to people or things when they land on them

You used these spy flies to help you with your vigilante work, you’d track criminals to places and use your technology to apprehend them and then alert the police to come and get them

You made sure to wear a mask and hide your identity, you also didn’t leave your technology behind for heroes to find and repurpose or mess with since your creations were precious to you

The Nighteye agency had been investigating your work and were trying to apprehend you but you kept evading them

One day, Sir Nighteye used his quirk on a suspected criminal and foresaw you apprehending them and decided to set up a trap for you

You followed the suspect to an abandoned warehouse where he and his supposed associates were hiding. Only to be caught by the Nighteye agency

When Sir Nighteye saw how young you really were, he decided that your talents would be wasted in Juvenile Detention and that you had a bright future ahead of you, granted, that you stayed on the right path

When Nighteye found out that you had been rescued by All Might as a child when your parents had died in an apartment building’s collapse, he saw how much you admired All Might

When you told him that All Might is an older hero and that he’s bound to retire eventually and that you feared for that day and that’s why you became a vigilante, he knew that you were a good kid and just needed a helping hand to get you on the right path in life

So he decided to take you in and teach you how to become a hero and although he may be strict and seem like a scary and intimidating guy, you both bonded over your admiration for All Might

When you showed him and had explained to him all your technology and how it works, he was curious as to why you weren’t in a hero school in a support course, you explained to him that your orphanage didn’t have the funding to send you to a hero school, which is why you had no other choice but to become a vigilante

After that, he decided to use his connections to enroll you in UA’s support course, to which you thanked him endlessly and hugged him calling him your hero. After that, he also adopted you and became your legal guardian

In time, you and your new friend Mei Hastume would become partners and become two of that century’s greatest technological creators and you both would go to live on I-Island

[bunnywrites1414]

Happy Kink-tober ~~

This years kinktober is 100% compiled of self inserts because I am a spoiled brat and this is my account :)))

I am not sorry for any of these

As always pls read the tags for EVERY SINGLE fic before you read. Don’t accidentally trigger yourself.

Day 1: Steve Harrington

Teasing- Your friends cannot take a hint and Steve doesn't seem to care

Day 2: Suna Rinatarou

Thigh Riding- What kind of jerk invites someone over and then sits on a computer game for 2 hours? Suna, that's who.

Day 3: Shota Aizawa

Oral Fixation- Y/N gets bratty without something in her mouth and Aizawa is tired of hearing her.

Day 4: Jax Teller

Daddy Kink- Y/N knows what that word does to Prince Teller, she just doesn't care

Day 5: Eddie Munson

Corruption- She is the cutest thing he's ever seen and he cannot wait to ruin her.

Day 6: Spencer Reid

Sadomasochism- Angry Dom!Spencer = Unfair punishments

Day 7: Hitoshi Shinsou

Mind control- Hitoshi's quirk is fun, when he can convince his partners to let him do it

Day 8: Johnathan Byers

Brat Taming- Johnathan is a pushover. His submissive is well aware of that. However it takes more than a pout to sway his friend Eddie

Day 9: Izuku Midoriya

Forced Orgasms- Y/N tastes like heaven and Izuku can't control himself

Day 10: Ushijima Wakatoshi

Size Kink- Ushiwaka is a big 'ol boy

Day 11: Sam Winchester

Angry Sex- Sam hates Y/N. Y/N hates Sam. Dean and Bobby think it's hilarious.

Day 12: Billy Hargrove

Costumes- Billy didn't even know Y/N was coming to this party, but he knows they're matching costumes and that her ass looks perfect in those shorts.

Day 13: Taishiro Toyomitsu (Fat Gum) ft. Kirishima

Teaching- Kirishima has some questions for his mentor and Fatgum is happy to help.

Day 14: Katsuki Bakugo

Phone Sex- Katsuki's away on a mission and Y/N can't cum without him

Day 15: Eddie Munson

Throat Training-Eddie is really good with his mouth, Y/N wants to make him feel just as good as he makes her feel, but it takes a little work.

Day 16: Kotaro Bokuto ft. Kuroo

Group Sex- Kuroo's little girlfriend is really cute and he knows it. Bokuto is a connoisseur of cute things, and Kuroo's not so bad.

Day 17: Eijiro Kirishima

Pain Play- Kirishima is a people pleaser and Y/N likes a little pain with her pleasure

Day 18: Jax Teller

Dumbification- Even 'big hot shot Scientists' need a few moments to be a little brainless.

Day 19: Amren

Blood- Amren has never had blood wraith

Day 20: Arron Hotchner ft. Spencer Reid

Pet Play- Arron forgets to mention he's bringing home a friend, and Y/N is deep in pet space when they get there

Day 21: Cassian

Primal Play - Cassian’s an animal.

Day 22: Steve Harrington ft. Eddie Munson

Degradation and Praise- Steve and Eddie balance each other very well, or at least Y/N thinks so

Day 23: Azriel Shadowsinger

Edging- 'If you hold it I'll reward you'. Y/N likes rewards.

Day 24: Spencer Reid

Bondage- Reid wants to practice his knots

Day 25: Dean Winchester

Overstimulation- Dean is cocky and Y/N thinks it's funny to push his buttons.

Day 26: Eddie Munson

Dacryphilia- Eddie teaches Y/N a thing or two about discipline and can't help but notice how pretty she looks when she's crying.

Day 27: Shota Aizawa

DILF- Aizawa knows he's old enough to be her dad, but his Nanny is perfect

Day 28: Tetsuro Kuroo

Psuedocest- He knows he shouldn't but she sounds so desperate. What kind of brother would he be if he just let his little sister suffer?

Day 29: Spencer Reid

CNC- Y/N is stuck. Like really really stuck. Her neighbor Reid agrees to help under one condition.

Day 30: Keiji Akaashi

Mutual Masturbation- Akaashi is a visual learner, but Y/N thinks he just likes to see her embarassed

Day 31: Jax Teller

Rough Sex- Jax likes to fuck after he fights, and his choice of ass has a hard time saying no to that smile.

[theflowerofthecommonwealth]

Hancock: “The Halloween scares this year have been fun and all, but let’s not forget that the scariest thing on earth is when Dad calls your full name. If he ever does that- then know you best say your prayers and get on your knees to beg for forgiveness.”

Nick: “Mr John Hancock! Why in Sam Hill is the kitchen covered in smoke???”

Hancock: (Puts his hands in his pockets) “Chem lab gone wrong… sorry Papa Nick.”

Nick: (Jabs his finger to the person next to the ghoul) “Mr Deacon John Doe, you better not have been sneaking around last night spying on the old folks!”

Deacon: (Holds up his hands in surrender) “Hey- in my own defense, you never know who could be a big fat faker in disguise!”

Nick: “And Miss Piper Wright, how many times do I hafta tell you that posing as a Gunner with a temporary tattoo on your forehead is not a safe or even reliable way of getting the latest scoop?”

Piper: (Rubs her hands together) “Eeeeuuuuuhh… I was hoping that you would over look that…”

Jasmine: (Watching this all play out from the sidelines)

Nick: “Can’t hide from a Detective, Pipes. Especially one that cares dearly about you.”

Piper: “Aaaw… and sorry, Nicky.”

Nick: (Points to Cait next) “And you, Miss Cait.”

Cait: (Snaps her bubble gum in her mouth) “Hm?”

Nick: “I have a lot to say to you- but we’d be here all day. However, don’t think that I’ll forget this!”

Cait: (Actually shudders for once at his tone) “Okay, you rusted bucket of bolts that strangely enough I give a shit about.”

Jasmine: (Tilts her head slightly at all the drama)

Nick: (Now turns to his daughter) “Now Miss Rosalinda-Marie-Esperanza-Gloria-Pacita-Estrella-Brookes-Romero-Valentine!”

Jasmine: (Drops her hands to her side with wide eyes at her full legal name)

Hancock: “Dang baby sister- that’s quite a mouthful.”

Deacon: (Raises a brow and whistles) “Is that your name or your address?”

Jasmine: “That’s my real and full name… My family talked my mother into it… She had a big message she wanted to put in my name…”

Cait: “Most people don’t even HAVE a last name to begin with. Like myself.”

Jasmine: “I know… I know- and I have THREE last names because of Nick’s that added to my other two.”

Deacon: “Wait- so why do we call you Jasmine?”

Jasmine: “Because people used to tease me with a song, saying that one day a boy will sing it to me in order to woo me.” (Starts dancing adorably as she sings) “Rosalinda, divina mujer hermosa. Que perfumas como aroma de jazmín.”

Nick: (Crosses his arms and taps his foot) “Don’t think that you’ll get away with this just by being cute.”

Jasmine: (Puts on puppy eyes) “But Daddy, am I cute???” 🥺🥺🥺🥺

Nick: (Heavy sigh) “Very cute indeed- but also you’re a very naughty troublemaker. What the hell were you thinking when you snuck away to take on a Super Mutant camp on your own?”

Jasmine: (Looks up in thought) “I was thinking… That I would give them all a scare of the lifetime for Halloween by slaughtering them one by one in a bloodied murder bath!”

Cait: “That-a-girl lass!!!” (High-fives the teen)

Nick: “For the love of God! Don’t encourage this!”

[toooster]

I saw a video abt this and so I wanna tell yall the things that are banned in my house (as someone with 4 (almost 5) siblings)

Skibidi toilet - because I walked in my mother’s room and put on her TV at 100 and she beat me!

Calling someone gay, lesbian, etc. - if you saw my rant post then yk my sister calls me a lesbian, so my mother decided to ban it!

Fat shaming - I love fat shaming my sister, and because SHE LITERALLY IS FAT..she got upset so calling anyone fat is banned!

Talking about ED’s - my sister accidentally dropped the fact that I have an eating disorder at dinner and my aunt started judging my mom, therefore it got banned!

Kiki do you love me - my dad was a fucking hater and banned it

Nerf guns - my cousins shot me in the head with one and then my brother stole one and shot me with it…SO ITS BANNED!

Calling anyone a bitch - my sister calls me a bitch and it got banned..

Forks - forks were banned for a month I think? It was because I stabbed my sister in the forehead!

Pitchforks - this one is self explanatory..but I did in fact chase my ENTIRE FAMILY with one.

Apple Watches - mine wasn’t banned but my sisters was because she called 911.

Calling anyone a leprechaun or a ginger - my sisters boyfriend (almost 5th sibling/step dad) is a ginger and I’m no longer allowed to call him that.

Raspberry cake - there was three slices of raspberry cake and I ate it all

Mint gum - this one goes along with the ED 😭

Cocomelon - I used to stay up till 4 am and watch it

Biting - my brother used to bite my fingers and I used to bite my sister in the back!

Calling my mother her real name - I used to do this because she’d make me mad and then she started charging me a dollar, then when I wouldn’t pay it, it got banned.

Landlines - my mom unplugged ours and hid it because I used to call my grandma who lives in a different state and tell her that our house caught on fire.

[bisexual-queenie]

Could you please post some Mha Pro Heroes head canons. By pros I mean the current pros.

Of course! Im super happy I got this ask!

(Trigger warning: A very small mention of a cult, but its not explicit)

All of nationality headcannons:

Mic: Half Japanese Half Italian

Edgeshot: Half Japanese Half Thai

Nighteye: Half Japanese Half Vietnamese

Miruko: Half Japanese Half Dominican

Mount Lady: Half Japanese Half Swedish

Present Mic, Edgeshot, and Nighteye are neurodivergent (ADHD, ADD, and Autistic respectively).

The Lurkers have a groupchat that was supposed to be for professional uses only, however it soon became so much more chaotic in a matter of minutes. People think Edgeshot, being the leader and all, created it, but it was actually Kamui (bless his heart by thinking it was gonna be professional). Edgeshot and Mount Lady quickly filled the chat with as much chaos as they could muster in 5 minutes.

Present Mic remembers every pro hero’s birthday, and you bet your ass he throws them the most spectacular birthday party ever (and by spectacular I mean the party fits what that hero is most comfortable with. If the hero in question doesn’t like huge elaborate parties, the party is more quiet and private. If the hero is a known party animal, then the room quickly becomes an elaborate house party)

Edgeshot and Ryukyuu know how to professionally throat sing. (Listen to “Genesis” by Otyken as a reference thats where I got this one lmao)

Some headconnons regarding pronouns and sexuality! (Please note these are no way cannon whatsoever, but rather something my brain think about a lot)

All Might: Cis Male — He/Him (Bi)

Eraserhead: Cis Male — He/Him (Gay)

Present Mic: Genderfluid — He/She/They (Bi)

Midnight: AFAB NB — She/They (Pan)

Ingenium (Tensei): AMAB NB — He/They (Bi)

Nighteye: Trans Man — He/Him (Gay)

Mount Lady: Cis Female — She/Her (Bi)

Kamui Woods: Cis Male — He/Him (Straight but such a wonderful ally. Would definitely hand out water at pride parades)

Edgeshot: AFAB NB — They/Them (Pan)

Best Jeanist: Cis Male — He/Him (Gay) (But like, he still could care less about gender, he identifies as a cis guy but trancends gender at the same time, y’know?)

Gang Orca: AMAB NB —They/Them (Gay) (In his words: “Orcas dont need genders”)

Miruko: Cis Female — She/Her (Lesbian)

Hawks: Cis Male — He/Him (Bi) (Never really put much thought into his identity, but is a huge supporter if everyone else in his usual nonchalant way)

Endeavor: Cis Male — He/Him (Straight) (I wholeheartedly think he doesn’t really understand, and thinks he is trying, but sometimes doesn’t show correctly, you know what I mean?)

Fat Gum: Cis Male —He/Him (Straight Ally all the way! He’s the one parading everyone around at pride event, wearing pride merch and making food for everyone)

Ryukyuu: Trans Female — She/Her (Lesbian)

(Please tell me if I used the correct terminology or not)

Nighteye can play the piano like a pro.

Present Mic loves playing the acoustic guitar. Hes THAT guy at a campfire.

While there is the obvious romatic relationships I adore (Erasermic, Edgejeanist, Nightmight, Kamui x Mount Lady, etc.), there are so many cute scenarios for platonic relationships

Eraserhead and Edgeshot being frenemies but caring for eachother so dearly.

Edgeshot and Ryukyuu BROTP

Gang Orca thinking they are the third wheel for Edgejeanist, but little do they know they consider them to be their “third”.

Lurkers being super close with one another

All Might caring for every pro hero like a mother hen

Nighteye and Midnight having gossip sessions

Miruko and Hawks BROTP #2

Ok, possibly the weirdest one yet: Yoroi Musha (the elderly hero, former number 9 hero) is Edgeshot’s adopted dad. (I saw it in a fic once and fell in love with it).

- The story (in my head) goes that Edgeshot was born and raised in a cult in rural Japan, and then one day when they were like 10 the comune gets raided after a tip was given, and Yoroi Musha led the raid. His eyes fell into a young, malnourished, and terrified Edgeshot and was like “they’re my child now” (This is the super simplified version, and Im super intrested in writing this!)

All Might considers Gran Torino to be his father figure. As a result, Nighteye considered him to be his father in law. Gran Torino wishes he can deny this, but at this point he cannot.

Last but not least! Eri, once she gets comfortable enough, considers every pro hero to be her aunt/uncle/somewhere in between.

Thank you @dragonspiritxx for the wonderful ask! I hope you like this!

Hopefully everyone else will to! I haven’t posted anything MHA related since I graduated high school back in May and started college as well, so Im glad Im back in the groove!

[peachsukii]

Soft Stuff!

Taishiro Toyomitsu (Fat Gum) loves to cook for you whenever he can. He also loves snuggles and is adorably flustered whenever you initiate a more adult kind of snuggling. He isn't opposed to it, he just isn't used to being seen as sexy. To which you point out that he should only worry about YOU thinking that, and no one else needs to think of him like that.

When (or if) you get pregnant, he is the ultimate fussy partner. He loves you and the baby so much and wants to do everything he can to make the pregnancy as easy for you as possible. It is a bit annoying but then he does something sweet or gives you that loving look...and all the annoyance melts to a puddle of love.

He is the best dad too, especially if you have a little girl. He would move heaven and earth for either of you, and you constantly tell him he cannot buy your daughter a real pony. By this time, the both of you live in a more child friendly place, and are the envy of your neighbors with how much love pours out of your house.

Awwww Fat Gum deserves the world! He really would be the best dad. 🥺💕

[sylvanfreckles]

Just Fat Gum being a dad to his three boys (and occasionally fighting with Aizawa over them)

Chapter Two: Kirishima has to interview a father figure for a school assignment. If only there was one sitting right in front of him....

(Yes I wrote more already, apparently this is how I cope with a bad day now)

[mikaya-hi]

Curvy queen (Kasuki Bakugou)

I know I shouldn't be self-conscious about my quirk, considering everyone has a different one with different qualities, but sometimes I wish I was quirkless instead of the curse I was born with. 

Okay, let me introduce myself first. Hi, I'm Y/N. I run a small bakery called 'Sweets and buns' that sometimes does events. My father is the BMI hero Fat Gum, and my mother is the healing hero Foodie. Both my parents' quirks require them to store up fat that they use to help people, their quirks combined to create mine named Absorption. How my quirk works is that my quirk doubles anything I eat and store it. It's a great quirk for my parents but I have no intention of being a hero. I just want to run my shop. My quirk causes me to gain weight really quickly and I train regularly to try and get a slim waist but it's no use. I have grown to weigh roughly 350 pounds (158 kg) which I can sometimes work down to 200 pounds (90 kg), and it has given me really bad self-esteem issues. 

I was at my dad's hero agency talking to Kirishima when he asked me if I do events, and before I realized what was going on, I was busy setting up the tables in the 1A dorms. 

"Hey Y/N need any help?" I heard the voice of my spunky red-headed friend. "O hey Kiri, congrats on graduate..." my voice fell flat at the sight of Kirishima walking closer with his friends, my stomach fell, he had beautiful friends I would never be able to compare to. "Oo Is this the pretty girl you were talking about Kiri?" A pink alien-like woman asked me as she made her way into my personal space. Feeling self-conscious I quickly made an excuse to leave but was stopped by a beautiful blond with ruby red eyes. "Hey extra, you better not think of leaving." I froze at his harsh tone. I saw his friends his friends disperse to welcome the crowd, his form stood unmoving until he uttered the words, "A pretty girl like you should stay enjoy the party." I felt heat rushing to my face as he turned to walk away. 

I did as the blond I now know as Bakugou said- thank you Kirishima- and decided to stay a bit longer. I had to admit the people here were really nice except a select few but otherwise I really did enjoy the party albeit I did feel uncomfortable among all these pretty people. They soon started the speeches, after which I decided to escape while everyone ate. I didn't quite yet wish to leave but eating now would only trigger my quirk making me pick up weight quickly. 

I found a nice-looking bench outside where I had the perfect view of the stars. "What are you doing out here?" I jumped at the sudden voice behind me. "I-I don't like eating in front of people." I stared at the ground trying not to look at him. "Thats dumb, why?" I could feel Bakugou sit down next to me. "W-well it's my quirk." "So?" I could feel tears starting to form in the corners of my eyes. "It makes me weigh 350 ponds every time I eat." He went silent for a second before I felt his fingers on my chin pulling my eyes up to look at him. "And I'm strong, so I don't see the problem." My breath hitched I could only stare at him, as he takes my hand in his and place a kiss on my knuckles. "Dance with me?" I stared at his eyes finding no sign of pity or disgust. I barely got a chance to nod before I was pulled to my feet and dragged to the dance floor. 

Once in the middle of the dance floor I was pulled square into his chest as he started to sway to the rhythm of the song. Soon more people joined us, my mind still reeling from our closeness when I felt his breath on my ear. "You might be heavy but you're not fat, maybe just a bit curvy." I smiled at his words as we danced the night away. 

[zorubark]

My headcanons for how the human counterparts of the TADC cast(mostly their appearence)

Kaufmo: He's a guy with a big belly and thin limbs, light skin, small eyes, long head, linguini nose, chubby linguini from ratatouile, short straight hair, somewhat crooked teeth, above average height but not short, downturned eyes, green-brownish eyes

Pomni: Bob cut with straight bangs, brown hair, a mole on the cheek, fat(to me Pomni irl is fat and nothing will change my mind), wears her work uniform at home, big eyes, eyebags, short, round eyes, brown eyes

Ragatha: Acne scars, wavy or curly hair, tall, blind in one eye(my dad is also blind in one eye :3), high nose bridge, upturned eyes, green eyes, redhead

Jax: Tall, brown skin, monolids, short curly hair, yellow teeth, NO JAUNDICE, amber eyes, wears overalls irl but with a colorful 90s sweater, skinny, when he smiles his gums show a bit

Kinger: Skrunkly middle aged man, wrinkles, blond, long skrunkly beard, long hair(somewhat skrunkrly), skinny needs to eat more, only puts his glasses on to read and doesn't use them otherwise, hooded eyes, blue gray eyes with brown near the black pupil

Queenie: Chubby, dark skin, straight dark brown hair, downturned eyes, brown eyes, mole near her left eye, big eyelashes that form a kinda spiky shape, latina(I don't know which country, there are too much cool countries to choose and y'know, I'm brazilian so I'm resisting the urge), uses a ponytail, middle aged, has wrinkles

Gangle: Black, braid ponytails tied with red ribbons, monolids, big lips, her face gets reddish-brown when she cries(this happens to my friends), has a bunch of skin tags, taller than pomni but still kinda short, thin, no boobs, no butt(I don't know how to say her body type without it sounding weird, I'm so sorry)

Zooble: Has arm and leg prosthetics, has a prosthetic eye, short curly hair, black, almond eyes, wears colorful 90's clothing, mismatched garments, full body, colorful jacket, forgets where she left her walking prosthetic leg so she uses the running prosthetic leg thinking it's gonna be fine to use just for a while but they walk wonky and theys till can't find the other leg and they want to walk and it's a horrible loop

[anchovies-4-dinner]

Fear (Y! Jiaoqiu)

Warnings: baby trapping, past male mpreg, alpha reader, omega Jiaoqiu, child abuse, cheating, physical violence

Word count: 1,305

*Points at Sunday* YOU’RE NEXT 🫵

______________________________________________________________ It seemed that the arrival of a babe wasn’t enough to stir the heart of his alpha.

Jiaoqiu bit his cheek, cradling his offspring in front of the fire. Alone… Again. He could count on one hand the number of times you returned since his labour, but for your excuses it would be too much for even three.

With every lie you grew increasingly flippant, ignorant to your many slip ups which would normally cost you the relationship if he were not a lovesick fool. Or maybe you just didn’t care, after all, it was no secret how much of a doormat your husband was now (when it comes to you at least).

Because of your absence, all this baby stuff had been shoved onto Jiaoqiu. He even had to take an indefinite break from work to coddle this beast; Feixiao was understanding, but Moze… he wore an all too familiar look.

I told you so.

A sudden cry quivered your lover’s ears. Jiaoqiu’s body moved automatically, accustomed to his new routine: ‘pop a tit for the babe to sip.’ He couldn’t even feel its warmth as its gums ground his bruised nipple.

He recalled his mother fondly reminiscing his own first whites peeking, and how she had to transition to bottle feeding as he was such a ‘plucker.’ She claimed that with each new change she only fell deeper in love.

But what love?

He was promised so many good things, but upon looking at the baby’s button nose and budding ears, he could only feel numbness in his heart. Numbness and… something else. Something he couldn’t name.

People say the infant years are the best years. The most memorable. Where are they now? He wants to grab them, shake them, scream at them:

‘Are you happy? You’ve fooled me with this burden! ‘Where is my lover?’ You tell me, you said this baby would heal us! Didn’t it work for you? It didn’t? Then we are both miserable fools, but I more so because you were already at the bottom! How dare you bring me to your level!’

Ah. He overdid it.

Now the cub was crying its face blue. Or was it him? Jiaoqiu couldn’t recall when his grip had tightened. Leaning back, he stared at the now blue-purple-whatever crying ball.

Cry, cry, cry. That’s all it’s ever good for. It’s all his neighbours talk to him about. Really, they even nicknamed him ‘crybaby’s papa’. No more ‘miracle healer’. He’s just a father now.

And tomorrow.

And the next few months.

And the next few years.

But foxians are long life species so how many years to go? For all his efforts, the math keeps flying around in scribbles.

Whatever the number it was far too many. Jiaoqiu’s throat ran dry as he stared at the ceiling, ears ringing from the crying. He pictured its wrinkled face with fat tears rolling down its cheeks. It’s kicking and pulling and squeezing for the sake of recklessness, coupled with snot bound to ruin his last set of clothes…

Disgust. That’s what it was. Whenever he was reduced to a pathetic dad by nosy aunts. Whenever he earned a mix of pity and annoyance from strangers. It all disgusted him.

Stop looking at him. So what if he chose wrong? Perhaps others should just mind their own business, yes? It won’t last anyway, you’re both new parents, so its only a matter of time before you assume your rightful place in this family.

The clicking of keys knocked Jiaoqiu back to his senses.

Reinvigorated, the man quickly stood up before realising what that spelled for the child. His hands fumbled as he caught the infant, shushing it to no avail. His ears perked up at your arrival.

Your lover rushed to your side and gave you a less-than-pleased greeting:

“Where have you been?! It’s already midnight, have you any idea what I had to deal with?”

You recoiled. That’s when it hit him.

His arm shot out and grabbed yours, sniffing your clothes with growing rage.

“I knew it. I knew it! That little slut, did you really think you could hide this from me?!” His eyes shook, highlighting his deep eye-bags and pale visage. “All this time I’ve stayed devoted while you’re eager to fuck anything with spread legs!”

“I wouldn’t have to get my fix elsewhere if you’d just… fixed yourself.” You sneered, giving him a once over. “How long has it been since you washed? Nobody would want to stay when you’re like this.”

Jiaoqiu’s eye twitched, “And who’s fault is that?! If you actually did your part, I would still be the man I was before all this!”

“And who’s fault is that?” You parroted back. “I’m not the one who stopped taking birth control. I’m not the one who stabbed holes into our condoms. I’m not the one who lied our entire relationship!”

“I wouldn’t have had to do that if you just spent time with me!” His voice was wet as tears blurred his vision. “I’m your husband for aeon’s sake; we were supposed to be happy together! Why did you change?!”

Your hand grabbed his, “Because you did.”

Did he? He just wanted to love you, even if it was in an unconventional way. Were you that averse to his affections?

“I want a divorce.”

His heart stopped. “… What-“

Papers were shoved in Jiaoqiu’s face. Upon closer inspection, they were, indeed, divorce papers. He trembled, breathing going awry as he stared into space. The baby squeaked when his arms grew limp. Thankfully, you caught and settled it down on the rocker with unexpected gentleness.

You held back no punches, “The sooner you get them done, the sooner we’ll both be free of each other. Trust me, you want this.”

At his lack of response, you stepped past him - only to be grabbed. Again.

“I’ll take everything you have. Strip you down to the clothes on your back.” There was truth to his statement considering his connections, “Is that what you want? Your lady will leave you too once she realises everything you had was owned by me.”

That was also true, as shameful as it was, but you were long past caring. “Do what you want.”

This prompted a bark of laughter even though Jiaoqiu found this far from funny. “After everything I’ve done for you, you still insist on being difficult.”

Before you could argue he leaned in close with a wild look.

“No. I won’t divorce you. I’m done being your cooped-up little bitch.” His claws dug deeper into your skin. “You’re going to quit your job and take my place, while I finally get to work again.”

You failed to curate a response. He continued with mirth, “Hah, why didn’t I do this before? To hell with this omega-alpha nonsense. Since you clearly can’t do your job, I guess I must coddle you once again, yes?”

He smiled and cupped your face, uncut nails grazing the tip of your lashes, “No more absent nights, no more cheating… Just like it was before. And all you have to do is stay home and watch our kit! Maybe I’ll even hire Nannies so we can make up for all our lost time- “

“Jiaoqiu!” You interjected before he could get any more delusional. “Are you hearing yourself? Do you have no self respect? We are done! I don’t love you!”

A loud smack resounded. It took a while for you to register the stinging on your cheek, and even more so when feeling the shallow cuts.

Jiaoqiu licked his nails, the tips minorly stained with blood. Your blood.

“Say that again.”

A familiar feeling crept up on you, reminiscent of the past.

He adorned that sly smile, “My dear, don’t make me repeat myself.”  

Fear.

[fatkish]

Hiii Can you do a fat gum x child daughter reader fluff headcanon I never actually see any x child reader with him 💀

Fatgum x Child Daughter Reader

Oh man is he a great dad

Your quirk is kinda similar to his as you’re able to store energy but not as fat. Your body stores energy as densely packed muscles. You’re not extremely buff, your muscles are just denser than a normal human’s

This gives you incredible strength, speed and stamina, at the cost that you can end up looking similar to small might.

Your dad always has you carrying plenty of snacks in your bag and sends you to school with the cutest bentos.

You both have plenty of daddy and daughter restaurant dates

You don’t need a comfy chair when your dad’s lap is so comfy

He’s your biggest fan and cheerleader and is constantly bragging about how amazing and adorable his daughter is

Has like a hundred photos of you and him in his office

He carries candy and snack like Hi-Chew, bubblegum, caramels, taffy, Pockey, etc. for you and fills your backpack with them

But it’s not all junk food with him

He makes sure that every meal is balanced and healthy as well as delicious and makes sure to teach you how to take care of yourself

He brags to his colleagues about your academic achievements even if it’s small

He teaches you self defense and even has some other heroes like Gunhead teach you how to protect yourself in the event that you’re in danger

Overall, he’s the sweetest, until you make papa bear mad

Oh, bullies don’t pick on you

They learned that the hard way when he showed up at your school and he gave the boys responsible a through talking to

(Sorry it’s kinda short @missmommymilker, I’ll add more as it comes to mind)

[richeeduvie]

can you pls write something about roman seeing baby jr as a newborn in the affair!au

Roman's fucking terrified. His kid isn't his kid and she came out too fucking early. He can't see her - he wants to rip his teeth and push dirt into his gums. Maybe then he'd feel better.

"Roman, you have to stop calling for now-"

"I'm coming. I love you. Don't be a fucking Mommy Bitch. Bye."

He hangs up, rolling his neck. He watches an old video of him and Baby, then emails something to Mencken's team. He sits with knees apart during the car.

Roman's come before, the first time seeing his daughter perfect in how scared and pissy in her being too tiny and needing fucking tubes to breathe.

He chokes and rolls the windows down. She's got his nose, she's okay to be picked up now - but every time he's forced to go home because he's not grey-haired Daddy...he can't sleep. He's getting twitchy and Shiv was pretty sure he was speaking Chinese at one point. She can't die without him there - that's a fucking insane thought, what the fuck? Why did that pop in?

But Roman's sure she'd get fat and not nicu-esque with him there.

"Where's my kid?"

"Roman. You can't just greet a room like tha-"

"Why isn't she here?"

She doesn't have to be in the nicu anymore, he came here to hold her. Where is she?

"They took her for some tests-"

He puts a hand on his hip, another raising up.

"Why? Fucking - why aren't you there? Why does she need fucking tests? You didn't call me?"

"They're routine tests. She's alright. They'll be bringing her back soon."

Roman gets shifty with his head movements and pinches his nose before letting go. Fine. Whatever. He should tell Dad they've been sharing vagina just to punish Baby.

"Roman, come here."

Roman listens, because it's her. Fine. Whatever. He comes into the hospital bed at her side, it's almost a hard landing.

"How was Dad today?"

"He's coming to visit later."

Roman's pretty sure he's gonna be better at this than Logan, that and the vagina holding. He peeks at the tiles.

"I deserve a blowie right now, unzip. You're probably lying to soothe me, so I'm betting we have some time before they bring the kid back he-"

There's a rolling of wheels and a smiling nurse - their daughter in that fucking glass cage. It makes Roman stand immediately, sick at the instant sight of her like that.

"She's all done and perfect. An a-student already, I'll just transfer her to the other crib-"

"Give her to me."

The nurse's face goes still. They blink an up and down at Roman.

"Are you a relati-"

"You hand babies over to the relevant people who ask. Scrubs don't equate to entitlement, Roberta. Give her to me."

Baby closes her eyes. The nurse sighs and takes his daughter, a bit chubbier - not enough, out of the crib and into his arms. They leave and Roman takes her in.

Fuck.

"She's doing good in weight, I know I've been updating, but you can feel it with every cuddle. Right?"

Roman doesn't say anything with her head to his nose. He doesn't smell that baby smell that's too specific. It's weird, but perfect. Baby watches him and guilt is on her skin, but she won't tell him that - not until he'll want to hurt her for doing to him. He will, even if it's not Roman-like to throw guilt at her.

A daughter so perfect will make anybody do anything.

"...I'm staying here tonight."

"Roma-"

"Dad's not gonna fucking visit. He's a great sort a Dad...I would know, I'm not gonna complain - but she didn't die, so he's not gonna make the daily check-up a priority. I'm staying here tonight. Don't fucking deny me."

Panic eats at his stomach. Roman fucking hates it, he doesn't get it and he wants to fist everything he doesn't get because he's thinking of his baby getting skinny and freaky-looking like sick babies do. That she's gonna die and he won't be there. Roman doesn't know why he's thinking of this, but it's hurting him.

"Please."

He feels pathetic in the begging, but he has to stay here so she can follow his breathing. He's been reading up on how babies learn and it's always very mimicky.

"...They'll wonder why you're setting a cot up here when you're her brother-"

"Shut the fuck up."

Roman murmurs it against his tiny, tiny baby's head. She's the most perfect thing he's ever seen and he wants to throw up. He fucking hates this panic and boiling...like what daddies feel. All of it without the damn name on his tag.

"I don't want to love her."

Baby's face softens, her hands twist.

"What?"

"You should've told me she was Dad's. I want to break my throat at the way I feel - you've given me nothing but a baby I can't see? And you what me? You're not stupid, you should know."

Roman, so slowly, careful in his terror and love, comes to sit on the ground with his and her's bundled baby.

"You should've told me she was Dad's if you wanted me to be pissy and just pissy about this. You don't me clean and squeaky when it comes to this."

"Okay."

Roman's brow twitches at a baby noise in his arms. His heart beats faster.

"Do you hear me?"

"Okay. I know."

And she does. Baby accepts it with a lean over, hand through his hair. No matter what, Roman will accept a touch from her too.

It's why he'll accept this hand you given him, if it means he can forget. Just for a little bit, with every soft rock and stare at his baby.

[wisteria-cherry]

forty days and forty nights (day twenty-five!)

“welcome!” you chime.

“fake-ass customer service voice.” bakugo snorted.

“i’m sorry, i don’t know what you mean, sir,” you chirp, trying to hide your snickering. “what would you like today?”

“hot caramel latte with skim instead of whole. extra froth made with half-and-half instead of milk, and add hazelnut syrup, and those weird-ass chocolate shavings,” bakugo began to rattle off an annoyingly long order. this continued until you finally relented.

“okay, okay!” you laugh. “can i suggest a medium black coffee instead?”

“can’t believe people actually drink that shit.” bakugo grunted, immediately reverting to his regular self. “too much damn sugar.”

“and black coffee’s way too bitter. it cancels out.” you shrug as he swipes his card.

“you work at a coffee shop and you don’t like coffee?” bakugo raised an eyebrow. “the fuck’s up with you?”

“i do like coffee.” you correct. “just with stuff in it. besides, not everyone feels the need to have the body of a greek god at all given times, so they can afford to have some sugar once in awhile.”

“i don’t ‘feel the need’ to maintain my damn physique and have a healthy lifestyle, brat.” bakugo grunted as he sat down. “it’s called being a hero. gotta stay in shape.”

“wasn’t there that one hero though—“ your face scrunched up as you tried to think of his name. “fat gum?”

“that’s different, that was part of his quirk.” bakugo scoffed. “shitty hair interned with him during ua.”

“did he really? that’s so cool!” you marvel. “did you do an internship?”

“yeah, with icyhot’s old man.”

“and his dad is endeavor, right?”

“yeah.”

“how was it? did you do it with anyone else?”

“one question at a time, geez!” bakugo barked. “it was fine, i did it with deku and icyhot.”

“deku and shoto? but i thought you hate deku.”

“i do.” bakugo grumbled. “but there’s no way in hell i’d let him prevent me from interning with the strongest hero i could.”

“well, i’m sure shoto enjoyed it. i bet it was fun doing the internship with his dad.” you smile.

“he didn’t. he hates his old man.” he replied nonchalantly as he sipped at his coffee.

“he does?” you blink. “why?” bakugo shrugged.

“i don’t fuckin’ know. s’not my business anyway.”

“oh.” you fell quiet before deciding to change the subject. “how’s hiro today?”

“‘s’fine.” bakugo raised his eyebrows at your expression as you stared at him, clearly implying that you want him to elaborate. “…he did a patrol today. beat a villain.” you smile. that’s what you were hoping to hear.

“tell me about it.” bakugo only shrugged.

“nothin’ to tell. he encountered a villain, did his thing and beat ‘im.”

“what’s ‘his thing’?” you ask curiously.

“he’s got a pattern to his fights.” bakugo took a big gulp of his coffee. “he dodges for a bit. he uses the time to let people evacuate in case he wrecks something while fighting and to track down the villain’s weakness. then he exploits it. that’s it.”

“that’s incredible.”

“duh. there’s a reason he works f’r’me.” bakugo rolled his eyes.

“you’ve got high standards, then.” you smile.

“no shit.” bakugo snorted.

“do the high standards apply to your love life, too?” you joke.

“you wish.” he scoffed.

“do you even have a love life?” you squint teasingly.

“obviously!” snapped bakugo. you hold up your hands in surrender. bakugo checked his watch. “i gotta run.” he set his finished coffee down and stood up, rolling his shoulders as he stretched, showing off the aforementioned god-like physique. he began to leave.

“hey, wait, bakugo!” you call. he turned, and you grin. “you got a special someone?”

“you wish.” bakugo smirked and left. you froze. that smirk was different than all the other ones. it was more cocky. it was more toothy.

it was hot, and it was official: you like bakugo.

“do you even have a love life?”

(feel free to comment + leave ur thoughts :)

(he lied he does not have a love life)

@k0z3me @cherryblossomclarity @stevenknightmarc @failingstudents-blog @jazzafaye5294