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usagikookiejams · 11 months ago

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WISH

Ran Haitani x fem!reader

⚠️ Warning: angst no comfort, violence, curse words, not proofread (sorry, too tired). That's all as I don't want to spoil the story lolll

Today was a very peaceful Saturday. You wish to spend the entire day with Ran; considering you got a good news to tell him. You tried to sleep in a little longer, your hand fishing for Ran that always sleep beside you. But to your dismay, he was not there. You woke up and searching for Ran through out the entire house until you heard a click from the front door; and Ran coming in. You went to hug his arm, swinging your body left and right in the process, "Hey handsomeee, I was thinking... how about we spend the day catching up with our favourite series and have dinner at night?."

You heard him sighed and forcefully retracted his arm; not even looking at you, "No thank you, I have a lot of work to do." You deflated, feeling quite hurt by his word but still, you insisted on spending time together. That is until, he glared at you while saying, "Can you just shut the fuck up?!! I got headache listening to you! Stop being so clingy! It's not like you are gonna die if I don't spend even an ounce of my time with you, is it?." Ouch... that was not expected from him. You masked your hurt by giving him a smile, "It's okay, I will leave you alone. I am sorry for disturbing you." Ran sighed and walked to your shared bedroom while saying 'thank you.' After you were sure that Ran was fast asleep, you went to retrieve your car keys and purse; deciding to spend time with yourself instead.

"I adore how you're constantly by my side. Please continue to do so, your presence is utterly endearing"

[Your POV]

That words kept on repeating in your head. You looked out of your car window to look at the entire city from the highest point of Roppongi. The word kept on haunting you, making you wonder if he was getting bored by your affection? You felt tears wetting your cheeks, you chuckled slightly at that, "How silly of me, thinking that he will always want me to shower him with affection. He is a busy guy too, so he must feel very tired and just want some time to himself," you monologued with yourself.

You went outside the car to get some fresh air. You looked at the city while stroking the ring decorating your delicate finger. Thinking how you're going to break the news to him without annoying him even further... Not realizing that a guy was approaching you from behind. You were suddenly forced into unconcious state and everything went blank.

[Ran's POV]

Back at home, Ran woke up from his sleep after what felt like hours. Looking at the clock, the time was currently at 2:00 p.m. Shoot.. he was supposed to be at the office since 12:00, why didn't you wake him up? He grumbled and called out your name plenty times but no answer. He remembered what he said to you in the morning, feeling guilty and now making a mental note to apologize to you as soon as possible. He stood from the bed and went to get ready for work...

At the office, he was informed by his secretary that the top executives are now gathered at the meeting room for what seems like an urgent discussion. He got there ASAP and apologized for his lateness, Mikey didn't get mad but just look at him pitifully.

"Do you got any calls from the enemy, Haitani?," Mikey looked at Ran making the latter guy dumbfounded. "Err.. whatchu mean, boss?," Ran couldn't help but looked towards his brother direction. "The Black Venom's man called our HQ around 11 a.m. saying that they got hostage with them..," Mikey announced. "So... what that got to do with me? Why shall I expect calls from them?," Ran still didn't understand the situation. "Are u fucking stupid Ran?! Boss meant to say that the enemy got your wife, Y/N!," Sanzu said while shaking his head.

Sanzu's word ringing in his ears making him rushing to retrieve his phone from his pocket. He tried calling you multiple times but it wasn't answered. He was getting impatient and decided to settle things on his own, until Mikey stopped him, "Sit down Haitani.. Keep your composure, I know the news is shocking but we have to discuss this matter first, how we're going to invade them. Considering they just destroy our plan of raiding their base this night." Ran couldn't disobey his order thus, sat down to discuss carefully regarding the plan.

You woke up from your unconciousness, feeling tightness around your limbs. Thus, quick to realize that you were bound to a chair. You looked in front of you to find any clue on where you are but didn't find any.

You suddenly felt something hard hit your head making you scream in pain. You looked upwards and saw a guy with baseball bat smiling sinisterly at you. You couldn't help but scream loudly to get any source of help. The guy once again hit you, this time around your chest to stop you from screaming. You fell backward making the chair also fell down with you. You tried asking for his sympathy but he didn't listen to you. He grabbed his phone from his backpocket and dialed a number.

After the third rings, someone on the other side of the call answered, "Hello, who is this?." The guy directed his phone towards you and changing the mode to video call, making you hear scream from the person in the other line. "What the fuck are you doing with my wife?!." Oh, that was actually your husband, Ran...

"I didn't do anything but maybe swing my baseball bat lightly to keep her shut her big-fat-mouth up hahaha," the guy looked at you making you felt like vomitting. "I swear when I got you, I will kill you as slowly as possible, as a payback for your action!," you heard Ran warning the guy, in which you couldn't help but smile a little. This action of yours made the enemy mad and started hitting you again and again, until you're coughing a lot of blood. "Is this how you're going to torture me? Dream on, you won't even able to reach me as we're currently at a very remote location," the guy zoomed in on your face making it very obvious that you're in a very critical state, your face is all beaten up.

Ran was about to warn him again but the enemy has ended the call. Ran couldn't control his emotion and started to punch the wall behind him until his fist was bleeding, "Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! I shouldn't have say that to her. If that is the case, she will still be safe at home," he started to cry. Rindou went to calm him down and said that the plan will take action as soon as possible once the ammo are stocked up in the cars boot. "I felt guilty that I yelled at her this morning, she sounded so excited too, telling me to spend time with her. I am such as stupid husband for not listening to her request. After what felt like days, I finally have time to be at home," Ran confessed his guilt. Rindou was about to comment on it, but was interrupted by one of the subordinates telling the executives that everything is ready. Everyone stood up and got ready to beat up that fucker and his gang.

You were pulled up by the enemy guy quickly. The guy cut the rope, and screamed at you to move as quickly as possible to the rooftop. You didn't want to anger him so you follow his order.

Reaching to the rooftop enable you to see numerous vehicles parked at the front entrance. Noticing one of them is what seems like Ran's car. You felt like fate is by your side so you couldn't help but scream that you're in the rooftop. The enemy guy that was by your side felt really angry that you gave away his whereabouts; leading to him landing a punch directed to your chest. You felt dizzy now that you has loss too many blood. You heard footsteps getting nearer and the enemy was looking much more uneasy. The rooftop door was barged open, revealing non other than your husband, Ran. You smiled weakly at him, but the smile was suddenly wiped off your face when you felt bullet hitting your chest. The enemy laughed at the Bonten members, saying how they were too late. Ran shot the guy in the head and ran to hug you, but all you could feel now is numbness throughout your body.

Your mouth kept on spilling blood, making your husband panic at the sight, "Fuck it! Come over here medic! What are you doing there?! We have to be quick, she's losing a lot of blood already!." Ran screamed at the medic team who were now rushing towards you.

"Hey baby... please stay awake yeah?," he stroked your cheek lovingly while tears were pooling in his eyes. "We will go home and spend time together as you wish this morning, yeah?," he felt himself chocking up on his words. You looked at him, hands trying to engulf his face close to you though your limbs felt as if they were screaming at you. "Ran...," you smiled at him. Ran held your hands and kissing each of them. "Do you remember, our promise back in highschool?," you try to refocus your sight to him as it slowly becomes unclear. "Yeah baby...I remember how we promised to love each other dearly, ensuring it won't fade though we already have kids together in the future..," he couldn't help but felt the tears rapidly streaming down his cheeks. "So tell me, Ran. Do you still love me?," you stopped to take a shallow breath. "Of course I do! I love you so much that words couldn't even described it!," he held your hands tighter. "But, why it seems like your love for me is fading? You don't look as excited like you always do when you looked at me this morning," you felt your heart twisted at the reminder of what he said to you this morning. "Baby, I don't get it. What do you mean?," he tried to make a connection from your words. "I am pregnant Ran, it has been 3 months. I tried to tell you this, but you dismissed me. It hurts Ran, it hurts when you said I am clingy. It seems like you don't get excited for us," you started seeing white lights from above, making you felt quite nervous leaving him behind. You heard him saying 'I'm sorry' for many times until it sounded too far away from you.

Ran cried and cried, mouthing 'I'm sorry' non-stop. That is...until the medic called him and shook their head no. Ran felt like his world was crumbling apart. Not only did he lost you, he also lost the baby made out of love by the both of you. He felt like fainting, screaming to you to come back and saying he didn't mean the words he said this morning. Everything went blank as Rindou now rushed to Ran to embrace his unconcious body.

It was now the day after your tragic death, a funeral was conducted in honor of you. Many people came to show their respect to you. All Ran could do was stare blankly at each of them as they neared your coffin. From the corner of his eyes, he could see a woman walking towards him with something in hand. The woman he remembered as your bestfriend looked at him with teary-red-eyes while handing the box to him, "Open this at home, don't cause a scene here. I want the last farewell for my bestfriend to be as peaceful as possible," she said then walked away. Ran looked at the box, it looks very simple; how you would like it. Ran couldn't help but cried a bit remembering you.

[Ran's POV]

The box has been placed on the bedside table since he got back from your funeral. Honestly speaking, he was afraid to open them. He wondered why your bestfriend glared at him with nothing but hatred in her eyes; it shows how whatever inside this box, must be something that is very important to you.

Seconds passed by and finally he bravely opened them and could see a letter on top of a soft fabric. He read the content:

"I am glad to be able to spend my life with you. I wish nothing but the best for our love journey. In whatever situation, I hope our love remain strong as it has always been. What I am about to show you is something that is very important to me; it has some part of me and you. I have never seen them before but I already know that it is the best thing that ever happened in my life. Take a look at it by yourself, love <3"

After reading the letter, he pulled up whatever it is inside the box. Plop! He heard something dropped by his feet, he retrieved it and noticed it is a pregnancy test. He started to get emotional over this, now fully expecting the other items inside the box.

Tang! The box dropped. He frozed...he did not...

Yeah, he may expected the other items inside the box to be baby stuff...

But...

What he didn't expect is...

There are two sets of them...

2 pair of shoes...

2 clothes...

2 baby bottles...

And lastly...

2 ultrasound pictures; showing the twins resided in your womb.

Ran felt like he couldn't breath, he felt like dying. Not only he lost you, but he also lost his baby, two of them actually.

Ran sworn to himself that he will never forgive himself for ruining what the future holds for him. He wish that God could burn him in hell as long as possible to clean him off his sins, no matter how may years it takes. Just to enable him living his life with you and his 2 babies still alive by his side in another life.

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runa-falls · 1 year ago

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Ok so I've been playing with Mel's Mafia Jake AI and it got me thinking about what Miguel would be like for some reason??? Dude's half Irish so like, maybe he's a boss in the Irish mob. Maybe he took over for his dad and he kind of hates it (has always hated it) but there's really nothing else for him so what can be do? So he goes about his life, about his business, runs his side of things well. He's lonely at the top but he ignores it, doesn't think anyone else would understand the pressure that's on him...

Until he meets you.

It's some celebration (maybe St. Patrick's Day or something idk) and he sees you across the room/bar/whatever and you lock eyes and have A Moment™️ and he decides he has to talk to you. So he does and you hit it off from the get go. You're smart, witty, funny, sexy...just the whole package. He's basically in love, okay?

Then a boss (maybe a rival heheee 👀) from another city or section (or whatever idk how they divide the city up tbh lmao maybe I should've done more research 😭) comes up and he finds out: you're his wife/girlfriend and it's just like a punch in the gut for him. He's devastated. He's never ever wanted anything anyone else had that he couldn't take...until you. Youre kinda bummed too, you really enjoyed the time you spent with Miguel, and you (honestly) aren't a huge fan of your husband/boyfriend (maybe he's an idiot or just a dick idk).

But you guys keep running into each other, and the feelings between you keep growing, until the tension breaks and you hook up with him at another get together (he takes you against a wall, fast and hard, his hand over your mouth because you're moaning as he pushes inside, the stretch of him divine and he buries his face in your neck, his cock spearing in and out of your wet heat in sloppy, hard thrusts. You're both coming in minutes, his spend dripping out of you and down your legs. The sight is almost enough to make him take you again).

After, you both say it was a mistake, that you can't do this again, it won't end well. But neither of you can help it, sneaking off to meet up in random places so no one catches you (except that one time it happened in your bed 🫢). And and and.... yeah. 🫣

I'M SO. SORRY SO MUCH HAS HAPPENED TODAY

OK FIRST, EVERYONE CHECK OUT THIS FAN ART BY @darkfoxkirin -- the mafia!mig of MY DREAMS

PLS WHITNEY:

Maybe he took over for his dad and he kind of hates it (has always hated it) but there's really nothing else for him so what can be do? -> i could literally imagine him sitting on a throne, bored as fuck like 😒 damn this SUCKS lolll

He's lonely at the top -> PLEASE THIS IS GIVING THE MAN WHO HAS EVERYTHING BUT IT'S STILL NOT ENOUGH -- I NEED HIM AHH

you lock eyes and have A Moment™️ and he decides he has to talk to you. -> the moment™️ KILLS ME LOLL, but YES a love or lust at first sight (spoiler, its both). not only does he need to talk to you, he needs you.

But you guys keep running into each other...-> HEY THIS WHOLE PARAGRAPPH, YOU DIDN'T NEED TO DO ME LIKE THAT 0-0, IM MELTING BRUV -- AND THEY KEEP MEETING 🫠

---

ok so imagine that he's getting pressured to marry someone because as the boss, he's expected to have an heir to keep the business in the family.

he agrees to meet up with some aristocratic women just to get his advisors off his ass. it's not like he's taking them home or anything, he's merely meeting them at one of the clubs he owns or getting some dinner.

of course, during one of these 'dates' he bumps into you and your husband.

looks like he's not the only one trying to keep a low profile during the affair.

even though your two gangs are rivals, your husband politely greets miguel (though anyone within a 5 mile radius can hear the venom that simmers below his words).

"Mr. O'Hara, what a surprise to see you here..." you roll your eyes at the dick measuring contest. men can be so --

"Likewise."

miguel doesn't even look at him, barely even acknowledges his existence with his murmured reply. he's too busy looking at you in your pretty dress and the necklace that sits against your chest. he gave you it a few weeks ago, the last time he could get you alone.

he tries to catch your eye but you're not looking back at him, you're looking at the girl who clings to his arm.

both of you barely register that your husband is still talking, eyes devouring the woman who's clearly confused by the tension in the restaurant.

"...and who is this lovely thing?"

"this? oh, this is m..." damn, he forgot. SHIT, he literally just read her file in the car before picking her up. this may not be a real date, but he's not a dick!

she saves him the embarrassment, "I'm Melissa, nice to meet you." she offers a hand, expecting a handshake, but your husband takes it for a kiss. gross. even melissa look weirded out.

"So you're finally out in the field again?"

miguel looks at you warily, but you've been avoiding his eyes during this whole interaction.

"You could say that."

"Good for you." your husband reaches out and holds your hands in his from across the small round table, "It's about time us bachelors settle down."

miguel's jaw clenches, watching how uncomfortable you are being touched by him. "Sure. Look it was great catching up, but me and Melinda have a table waiting."

#MAFIA!MIGUEL #mafia au #AHHH I LOVE IT #MOOTS #screaming with moots #miguel o'hara #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel o'hara smut

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rascal-xo · 1 year ago

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Okay okay how about Ghost x reader but they’re both stubborn and hate to admit they said something wrong or whatever after an argument and the others have to coerce them into a room by themselves to talk lolll

Thanks !!

Stubborn | Simon Riley x G!N Reader |

Chapter Summary: You and Ghost’s constant bickering gets between the team and an important mission…

Warnings: angst angst angst ! + language

Tags: @glitteryeggalmondherring @fiveshelmet @madamemelancholysstuff @myguiltypleasures21 @pukbadger

A/N: Thank for the request! I hope I was able to capture your idea how you wanted :)) 🩷

As the sun dipped below the horizon of, casting an orange glow over the skyline of Al Mazrah, you and Ghost found yourselves huddled behind a crumbling wall. The mission had been intense, with enemy forces closing in from all sides. But the real challenge wasn't the enemy; it was the constant bickering between you and Ghost.

"Why cant you just fucking listen!" Ghost hissed, his voice dripping with frustration. "Every time I give an order, you're off doing your own thing!"

"Oh please," you retorted, rolling your eyes. "You think you're the only one who knows how to shoot a riffle? Maybe if you weren't so stubborn, we wouldn't be in this mess!"

Ghost clenched his jaw, his eyes narrowing. "Stubborn? You're the one who refuses to follow orders!"

"I follow the ones that make sense!" you shot back, your voice rising. "But you’re never putting me in!”

The tension between you was palpable, and the rest of the team exchanged worried glances. The constant bickering and fighting were beginning to take a toll on everyone's morale and focus. It was becoming clear that something had to change, and fast.

"Enough!" Captain Price's voice boomed, cutting through the heated exchange. "We don't have time for this petty squabbling. You two are a team, and need to start acting like one."

You and Ghost fell silent, casting sidelong glances at each other but refraining from saying another word. The weight of Price's words hung heavy in the air, reminding you both of the importance of unity and cooperation.

"We have a mission to complete," Price continued, his voice firm. "We're facing a formidable enemy, and if you’re not working together, you’re as good as dead.”

As the team returned to base, the air was thick with tension. The mission had been a close call, and the bickering between you and Ghost had reached new heights. Despite the danger that lurked outside, it seemed that the real threat was within your own ranks.

Captain Price led the way into the briefing room, his expression grave. He turned to face both of you, his gaze piercing. "Sit down," he ordered, his voice leaving no room for argument.

Reluctantly, you and Ghost took your seats on opposite sides of the room. The tension between you was palpable, and the rest of the team watched anxiously, unsure of what would unfold.

Soap and Gaz exchanged an unknowing look and moved to watch from outside of the room.

Price stood before the two of you, his eyes shifting from one to the other. "I'm tired of this constant bickering," he said firmly. "It's affecting our team dynamics, and it needs to stop.'

Ghost crossed his arms defiantly, his jaw set under his balaclava.

"Both of you have valuable skills, but you're wasting them on pointless arguments. We need unity, trust, and cooperation to succeed. You won't leave this room until you can work out your differences.”

With a sigh, you leaned forward, resting your elbows on the table. "Fine, let's get this over with," you muttered, your voice laced with reluctant acceptance.

Ghost uncrossed his arms, leaning back in his chair. "Don't expect me to apologize for wanting to keep the team alive," he retorted, his voice still holding a hint of defiance.

Price fixed his unwavering gaze upon both of you. "This isn't about assigning blame," he interjected firmly. "It's about finding a way to work together, and not pounce at each other. Get comfortable, reckon you’ll be in here a while.”

He chuckled dryly, then walked out, closing the door behind him with a click.

The room suddenly felt smaller, the walls closing in as the weight of your disagreement settled upon you. But perhaps being forced to confront your differences head-on was exactly what was needed.

“You’ve had a problem with me being here since I joined this team.” You spoke up, annoyed enough that the confidence to speak up surpassed your expectations.

Ghost's eyebrows shot up in surprise as your voice broke through the air, carrying a touch of irritation. He turned his gaze to you, his eyes narrowing slightly.

"Is that what you think?" Ghost's voice was low, edged with a hint of incredulity.

You leaned forward, meeting Ghost's gaze head-on, determination fueling your words. "It sure feels that way," you replied, your voice firm. "Ever since I joined this team, there's been this constant tension between us. You single me out every time— It’s hard to ignore.”

When you first got recruited to the 141 it was almost immediately that you were introduced to his hard demeanor.

It wasn't just during training that Ghost pushed you. In mission simulations, his critical eyes were always on you, quick to point out any mistake. He questioned your decisions, your abilities, and it seemed as though he was determined to prove that you didn't belong.

Ghost's eyes soften, his usual stoic demeanor giving way to a momentary flicker of vulnerability. “You’re a passionate fighter, Y/N. But you’re reckless and you don’t think.”

It was true—your determination often drove you to take risks without fully considering the consequences. In the heat of the moment, your instincts had overridden caution, and it had led to mistakes.

The pairing of you and Ghost on missions had become a familiar occurrence. Captain Price recognized the complementary nature of your skill sets, and despite the constant bickering, he knew that together, you had the potential to achieve great things.

However, as time went on, a pattern emerged. You would often return from missions with more visible signs of wear and tear—scuffed up, bruised, and determined to prove yourself. Deep down, there was a burning desire to earn Ghost's respect, to show him that you were capable and worthy of standing beside him.

You sighed, looking up to meet his gaze again. You sighed, the weariness evident in your voice and the ache in your bruised eye intensifying. The constant arguments and bickering with Ghost had taken a toll on you both, physically and emotionally.

Ghost knew he had never met anyone quiet as passionate and determined as you. He just couldn’t bring himself to say it out loud.

"I don't want to fight anymore, Ghost," you confessed, your voice tinged with a mix of exhaustion and vulnerability. The words hung in the air, laden with the weight of your accumulated frustrations and the genuine desire for a change.

Ghost's eyes softened as he looked at you, his typically stern expression replaced by a flicker of understanding. He, too, bore the marks of battle, the signs of the toll the conflicts had taken on both of you. “We could use a drink, yeah?” Ghost admitted, his voice gentle.

For the first time in a long time, you smiled at him softly. Unknown as to what his face would be like in that moment under his mask, for once you two were both satisfied with each other coming to an agreement.

“You’re buying. Cant you let you off that easy.” You tease, standing up.

With a nod, Ghost rose from his seat, his demeanor shifting ever so slightly. "Fair enough," he replied.

Your hand gripped the door handle, ready to push it open and step out of the briefing room with Ghost following behind you. However, to your surprise, the handle refused to budge. You furrowed your brow, trying again with a bit more force, but still, the door remained steadfastly shut.

The realization suddenly hit you. “Did he fucking lock us in here?”

An exasperated sigh escaped your lips as you turned to Ghost, who was eyeing the locked door with a mix of annoyance and acceptance.

“Fuckin hell…” You watched as he returned to the table, sinking back into his seat with a sigh. Curiosity sparked within you as he pulled out a small flask, a glimmer of mischief dancing in his eyes.

He motioned towards you, silently inviting you to join him. Your eyebrows furrowed in surprise. You fell back into your seat now next to him. You reached out, accepting the flask, and took a swig.

Ghost watcged, the corners of his lips twitching into a faint smile under his mask. “How long do you think until he realizes it doesn’t open from the inside.” You chuckle, turning to eye him.

“When he hears me shooting it open.”

#call of duty #call of duty modern warfare #call of duty smut #fanfic #simon ghost riley #ghost x reader #simon riley imagine #ghost x female reader #simon riley x you #ghost x you

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for-ships-that-never-sail · 5 months ago

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Okay Y'ALL I saw Episode 5 today and these are the thoughts I jotted down while watching it (PART 1 OF 2)

Please don’t read below the cut if you are avoiding spoilers until you get to watch it yourself

And FYI some of these may not have any context, but I guess it won’t matter cause you’ll have context in 7ish hours anyway (also sorry about how long all my thoughts and feelings are lol)

We’ve all seen the first 4 mins so that’s that - nothing extra special to add there other than that Colin’s soft voice for Pen feels like it makes my heart grow bigger every time I see it

Um what the absolute fuck was that opening title??? Have they deviated and changed that this much before?? Have I never noticed other than with the very small changes they do with adding the correct Bridgerton’s name etc?

Anthony wanting to do that one Monica scream is adorbs

LOLLLLL I love you sweet Greggy

LMAO Cressida with them BARBS

Awh Cressida I do feel for you my girl

OMFGGGGG Colin’s chat with the boys??? THIS IS MUSIC TO MY EARS!!!! SOMEONE STAB ME IN THE HEART AAAAH

And Anthony with that quick wisdom? Is it rude of me to not really have expected it from him even though I know this kind of good sense is in him? I do love you Ant! Sorry that I still think of you as SLOW to good sense because of last season lol

Also that cute and private GOSSIPY moment? LOVEEE

OH PORTIA FOR FUCKS SAKEEEEE WITH “THOSE EXACT WORDS” why are you stressing her out but also why are you STRESSING ME OUT?

BAHAHAHAHAHHSSHHAHAHASHA THAT IMMEDIATE 360 please stopppppp I have whiplash - this show has never presented something I personally see as a legitimate concern (from the character's perspective) and then proceed to resolve that issue soooo fucking fast, like that took two seconds PLEASE I’m dying, I can’t believe I thought I’d be stressed about that comment for a considerable amount of the episode? and then BAM 😂 Excellent job Colin!

For the love of god no one wants to chaperone them???? They’re just gonna go???? No one is gonna stop them? Like is she the John Cena of the Bridgerton universe?? Everyone is just like, oh look, Colin walking down the street speaking to himself, oh look he’s in a carriage, also just speaking to himself - like H'WHAT?

Having that said, yes of course get her alone and fuck her by all means if that’s what you wanna do, don’t let my hang ups about propriety and the rules of the ton stop you my boy

Omg pen my baby was so moved 🥹 She somehow hadn’t processed that whole thing even during the carriage ride? Because unless they teleported, she was just like reeling in silence until this point, just like, looking for the words???

Oh my god OH MY GOD OH MY GOD there you go Portia my mans was as clear as he could be about the exact words both indirectly and directly thank you very much

Omg STAHPPPP I can’t Col you should totally write her love letters saying this type of stuff every day - it’s what she deserves 🥹

Omg they’re so cute???!!!

Consent king!! This is so INTIMATE and CUTE!!! 🥹

Have I never seen tits bigger than like a 32B on Netflix before? Cute lil perky tits never really get registered as out there nudity I guess? Like I knowwww we saw tits the last two seasons, and I guess at the brothels this season too, which I nearly forgot, but like even 0.6 seconds of Pens tits rn feels like I’m on HBO and not Netflix? LOLLL

NO ONE HAS EVER REMOVED A BELT BETTER THAN LUKE NEWTON HAS

FUCK he’s so hot??? I’m probably equally attracted to both actors irl tbh but in the showverse Pen is just my girly and Colin was just my sweet boi too right up until he started undressing rn? Now pen is still my girly but Colin can fucking get ittttt LOLLL

Also we’ve seen him undressed before??? I don’t know what’s going on but he did the 0.0003 second belt thing and I audibly gasped and my brain suddenly went blank and now I’m just drooling over Colin and how hot he is fml

Luke Newton should probably just go around taking his shirts and belts off all the time tbh

Just in real life, stay undressing king, you’re such a treat 😍

Awh he’s got the cutest lil butt, but like…. I can’t look? I’m feeling an odd amount of… second hand embarrassment about his butt? I don’t know if that makes any sense but somehow it feels wrong to be looking at your butt Colin I’m sorry this is just like Pen’s property now you know? I shouldn’t seeeee this lol

Kinda wish they edited out that tiny bit where he moved the sheet? I assume that was for the sake of the actors/show because they can’t actually be like fully naked out here, but that tiny bit could’ve been easily edited a different way - only because I don’t want it to register like he’s covering her up? He’s not, he 100% would NEVER, but like logistically I get it, just wish the editor saw it the way I see it and took that bit out

oop JUMP SCARE Lmfaooooo my mans thought it would end before it even began 😂😂😂

Awh he’s so sweet with her - Touch me anywhere? Please they are really taking on such great parts from the books

Though on a side note I wish that this mirror idea was broken into 2 parts too? like part 1 he just says the lines from the books about wanting to grab her tits and fuck in front of a mirror but they don’t because he wants that gentle missionary first time, and then part 2 after the LW drama he actually passionately fucks her in front of the mirror, horizontally sure, but like from behind while facing the mirror? That's such an easy way to cover her up too - one arm coming from under her, wrapped around her bust to cover her there, and other arm coming over her and snaking down her belly so we know there is finger action but Nic would still be tastefully covered - this allows them to just stare at each other through the mirror the entire time which could have been sooooo hot? And I wouldn't have to suspend disbelief when it comes to her tits not touching any part of him through this whole thing lol - It’s aight though, this is what AO3 is for and I’m by no means disappointed with anything that’s happening rn

Still, circling back, is it like an actor/show rule to just show tits and not do anything else with them? Because I knowwww Colin isn’t gonna just fuck her without sucking on them titties that whole entire time, like please BE REAL for just ONE second, cause there’s absolutely nooooo way his hands and mouth wouldn’t be directly on those tits - but yeah, if it’s an actor/show thing to not do it because it might be too porny/uncomfy, I get it - I’m just looking for that realism because come onnnn there’s literally NO WAY his mouth wouldn’t be all over that LOL

Like even with their vertically challenging situation, I know my mans would fold his neck his back his spine his evvvverryyything to get his face on her tits LOLLLL

Also, sir? Everyone enjoyed your fingers but when are you going to eat my girl out? Please she deserves to see God???!!!!!

Never underestimate the power of grabbing your own dick to get it in either, it's just so fucking hot and I don’t make these rules

I personally think the carriage scene was A LOTTT spicier than this though

Sorry guys, don’t be upset or anything - I just think THAT was PASSION and THIS is LOVE

Slow and settled love - best friend love - honestly it’s how I see couples being intimate once their honeymoon phase is long over - just like, chit chatting while gentle fucking - super comfortable with each other and just not awkward at all - contently smiling and giggling afterwards, like that was all just totally normal everyday behaviour between them

It’s like they’re having a casual bestie moment, just the same as walking around in a market or gossiping in a ballroom

When you really think on it though, it’s so cool that a first time can be this way because you’ve just been best friends your whole life

Anyway, no furniture break I’m afraid

#polin #bridgerton netflix #bridgerton #colin bridgerton #penelope featherington #penelope x colin #colin x penelope #nic and newts #lukola #nic and luke #nicola coughlan #luke newton #bridgerton spoilers #bridgerton season 3 spoilers

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loveephia · 2 years ago

Note

can i get iwa and ushijima with reader whos oikawa's sister? preferably hs them <33

I was thinking maybe oikawa and reader are like a dynamic duo type beat and SHE ALSO PLAYS VOLLEYBALL so to like DOUBLE DOWN on hot sibling duo pointsss

sorry if thats too specific i love your pieces <3<3<3<3

ushijima + iwaizumi with a girlfriend who's oikawa's sister. (separate.)

content: (🦷) tooth-rotting fluff, you're a third year and a strong volleyball player here, protective oikawa.

⚠ warning/s: none.

note: IT WASN'T VERY CLEAR THAT READER WAS FROM A VOLLEYBALL TEAM, SO I'M SORRY IF I'VE DISSAPOINTED YOU. 😭 OTHER THAN THAT, ENJOY READING!!!

a similar post of mine.

USHIJIMA WAKATOSHI

HUHHHH

ok, first of all, oIKAWA DOES NOT ACCEPT.

OIKAWA DOESN'T WANNA SEE HIS BABY SISTER GETTING MARRIED TO USHIWAKA OF ALL PEOPLE???

you tell him to chill because first of all, you're both still in high school

second, you only started dating just a week ago

and third, how'd he even zoom that far into the future

oikawa's having a mid-life crisis on the floor, trying to comfort himself by rocking back and forth

you poke the poor dude and he just

yeah

you reassure him that ushijima treats you amazingly and that there's truly nothing to be worried about

oikawa doesn't trust your words until he watches you leave him and walk towards ushijima, who was standing by aoba johsai's gate, waiting patiently just for you

the smile on both your faces are warm, oikawa notices that

maybe he'll trust ushijima JUST this once..

IWAIZUMI HAJIME

oikawa could care less. as long as it isn't that son of a gun ushiwaka, then he has no problem.

a lie

he most definitely does care

he's got hawk-eyes on iwaizumi, making sure he never ever hurts you

you and iwaizumi are doing warm-ups, and you're chuckling at all of his charming smiles, even shooting one back yourself

iwaizumi thinks you're absolutely adorable

while oIKAWA WANTS TO SCREAM AND CRY.

😭😭HIS BABY SISTER😭😭IS GROWING UP😭😭SO FAST😭😭

he spikes a volleyball at the back of iwaizumi's head just because

and iwaizumi was definitely not happy about that.

you watch oikawa get chased around the gymnasium by an angry iwa, and you only laugh

if you really wanna test oikawa's limits, try kissing iwaizumi on the cheek in front of him

oikawa'll be long gone LOLLL

393 notes · View notes

lewkwoodnco · 1 year ago

Text

get him BACK! - Lockwood x Reader

A/N: The idea for this fic has been living rent-free in my head for WEEKS and I finally decided to write it all out hahah I wanted to try a new style of writing, something more lighthearted and not so serious/depressing so here's a fun lil fic based off get him back! by olivia rodrigo! couldn't decide which gif to put so I put BOTH lolll ofc I made some modifications to better fit Lockwood and there are some parts where their relationship isn't the healthiest butttt it's a work of fiction soo take with a grain of salt! Tyyy to @karensirkobabes for giving me the push I needed to get this written down <3 enemies to lovers, reader is a Fittes agent similar to the I can see you fic (not exactly the same set up but quite similar so think parallel universe?) HAVE FUN, 5.4k

Enough was enough. She picked up the golf club and stomped out.

“Y/N. Y/N! Where are you - hey!”

She pulled her arm back, and now she was bringing it smashing down, probably inefficiently so, but she didn’t care. She punctuated Lockwood’s yells with shattering glass and screams of her own, wreaking havoc on his car like a woman scorned. She was a woman scorned. How dare he be so irritating yet so fucking irresistible all in the same breath?

She had met him shortly after she came back from a much needed summer vacation, ready to dive into a case that ended up lasting nearly 7 months. They had been assigned to the case around the tail-end of August, but for some odd reason Barnes had been keen on briefing them individually. Perhaps it had something to do with how both of them had hounded him after their frosty first encounter. She had tried her best to be open-minded, but she couldn’t help how her face twisted over having to work with this pompous prick, convinced that he was God’s gift to them all. That was enough to incite some snarky, underhanded comment and she retaliated, and they went back and forth until they realised Barnes was gone.

In hindsight, maybe it was their extreme hounding of him as they begged to be assigned elsewhere that made him decide to never be in the same room as both of them.

"She's uptight, narrow-minded, contemptuous -"

"I hate him I hate him I hate him I hate him I-"

"- bossy, irritating, ill-tempered, and did I mention uptight?"

"- I hate him I hate him I hate him I hate him I-"

"Enough!" Barnes could only walk so fast and they could walk faster. "The rest of the teams are already stretched thin over this spiked string of hauntings across the country. So if you want to keep your job, and if you want the commission I know you so desperately need, I suggest you find a way to put aside your differences."

So she couldn’t avoid him forever, though she tried her best. He just had to have an opinion over everything that came out of her mouth and that opinion always had to contradict hers.

“I think we should split up into the different rooms.”

“Hmm. I think it’s best we all stay in the dining hall.”

“But the Sources could be in the rooms too.”

“But it’s unlikely, since most of the guests were killed during a dinner party held…where was it? Oh yes, the dining hall.”

“All the cutlery from that party is in the kitchen, the tablecloths in the linen cupboard, the chairs in -“

“Because cutlery, tablecloths and chairs are known for being prime Sources. Infamous, really.”

She hated how mocking his eyes were. She was a leader of strong character with resolute faith in her instincts, so damn did it sting to cave.

“Fine. Shaw, you’ll set up the chains -"

“Don’t be ridiculous, Lucy’ll do it.”

“Why?”

“She’s the best Listener in all of London; she’ll know the best place to set them up.”

“Fine. We’ll meet in the dining hall at 5 pm-”

“Hang on - what about the groups?”

She mouthed wordlessly at him. “Wha - we just decided that we’ll all be in the same room! What groups?”

“To look for the Sources in the linen closets, the kitchen, the -“

“I thought we just decided that those trinkets were too menial.”

“Oh, well, we can never be a hundred percent sure, can’t we? A good agent is thorough, you know.”

She blinked, her eyes sliding over the rest of her team’s as she wordlessly mouthed retorts which were too stunned to form. She tugged at her hair, dreaming of yanking it from her scalp strand by strand.

“Fine. Fine. Fine.” She slammed her journal on the desk, treating the pages with less care than she ought to be. “Shaw and Karim, you’ll take the parlour. Lockwood and Vernon, you’ll take the master bedroom. Carlyle and -“

“Vernon? Hasn’t he been sick, like, three times this week?”

“I’LL do the master bedroom with you, Lockwood. Anything wrong with that? Hm? Anything to nitpick or whine or complain about?”

He leaned back in his chair, his smile a little too lazy for her liking. “Trying to get me into a bed? We’ve only just met.”

She had to physically restrain herself from screaming at him. That wasn't any different from the kind of digs they took at each other in private, so why was her face beginning to heat up?

"What can I say?" She spoke through gritted teeth. "You bring out the absolute worst in me."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Thankfully, by the time they were stationed in their different rooms, most of the fight had bled out of the two of them, and they were the closest they have ever been to amicable, or even civil. Lockwood insisted that he was better at handling a rapier than her so they decided that he would keep the visitor back, should it make an appearance, as she searched the room.

A visitor did show up, screaming something awful at the two of them. She was spiralling in despair as she tore apart drawers and boxes, coming up empty. Then, in a sudden wave of inspiration, she realised that they hadn't considered looking under the floorboards. There had been a loose one in the corner of the room, but the only problem was that the visitor was floating mere inches above the floorboard.

Lockwood, with all his proclaimed prowess, seemed quite evenly matched with the visitor, and he looked far too pale to comprehend a new plan. She squeezed her eyes shut and launched herself to the floorboard, hoping that the surprise would be enough to give the visitor pause. There was an anguished yell mixed with aggressive taunts from Lockwood, and she could make out the hiss of a flare as her fingers scrabbled for the Source: a pen. She flung it into her net and the visitor disappeared, leaving behind Lockwood sprawled on the floor, having been backed into a corner.

She numbly put the chains away and shouldered their bag of supplies, starting the trek downstairs while Lockwood caught his breath and struggled with something. She hadn't missed the outrage in his eyes and the way his jaw was ticking something furious, and prepared for the worst.

"What the hell was that? That wasn't the plan!"

"Oh, but you provoking the visitor was?"

"I was drawing it out! You were inches away from being ghost-touched."

"I was not."

"Were too!"

"Ugh, you're such a child!"

"You know, none of this would be happening if you didn't suck at finding Sources."

"Like you would have been any better."

"Actually, yes, I would have."

"Fine!" She turned and threw the bag at him, relishing the way it (momentarily) knocked the wind out of him. "You look for the rest, and God help you if you don't find them all."

Fortunately or unfortunately, her threat never saw the light of day as the rest of them had managed to find the other Sources with not nearly as much fuss as them. Everyone was too tired to talk much on the way back to DEPRAC. She began drafting their report while Lockwood helped Lucy limp along to one of the nurses. She signed the report, not looking up as Lockwood approached.

"Come to yell at me some more?"

"Ha-ha." But it was wooden and deflated. She glanced at his exhausted face and decided it wasn't worth it. "I was just...taken aback, is all. I didn't mean to -"

"It's fine. I wouldn't have lasted this long if I crumbled every time someone got mad at me."

The corner of his mouth quirked upwards and she felt this absurd sense of accomplishment.

"Still, let me make it up to you. Let's all go for dinner. My treat."

"Oh." She felt her face warm as she clumsily tried to remind herself how awful he was and how terrible having dinner with him sounded. "It's no need, really -"

"We'll be at this for a while, if tonight was any indication, so we might as well keep our spirits high."

"But-"

"I'll get George to start flagging down some cabs." With that, he briskly turned away, case report in hand, while she stared at him like a goldfish. So he was a prick on and off the job. Who did he think he was, ordering her around like that. Part of her wanted to refuse to come along out of spite, but she was starving, so she settled for a silent internal rebellion.

As much as she hated to admit it, the food was good and her team members seemed to be having the most fun they've had in months, if their noise was any indication. George and Ned were locked in some intense argument about their research on the house and Lucy was desperately trying to get them to shut up, in between a conversation about cheese rolling. She was getting lightheaded from laughing over Lucy's unusual fascination and George being George ("Shaw, say one more thing about my page holder and I'll come over there and fuck you up.") when Lockwood turned to her, half-yelling into her ear, and she nearly choked on her drink. Her weird sense of humour was usually perceived as non-existent, but Lockwood somehow managed to come up with the most out-of-pocket statements that made her sides ache. But she still hated his guts, of course.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

And so began their convoluted relationship. Sure, they were both prone to the extremes, but in an oddly balanced kind of way. They would butt heads and swear at each other copiously during cases and then tiredly patch up (mostly) over dinner. She had started to grow fond of their team dinners, but only because of the camraderie and fostered and not because it meant having the thigh of a certain someone with excessively long legs pressing into hers in their cramped corner of the booth. That was just an unfortunate by-product that she, er, suffered through. That, and the wrestling with Lockwood over the bill ("How are you affording any of this? Aren't you at the edge of bankruptcy??"). Their relationship was complicated enough before his string of small gifts began.

Lockwood walked into the agent lounge where she was examining the file of their mission that night, and her eyes barely flickered in acknowledgement. The case was excruciatingly demanding to the point where they spent less time apart than together. He tossed a small bag on her papers before being accosted by one of her team members. By the time he was done, the lounge had cleared out and she had unwrapped the package. Her eyebrow twitched.

"What's this?"

"Oh, I thought someone might have told you by now. This here is a nifty little device called a watch, and -"

"Hardy har har. You're hilarious. I meant, why are you giving this to me?"

"Oh. Didn't your watch get smashed a few nights back?"

She grimaced. It had been rough to accept, but she had slammed against the wall so roughly that it was a miracle she didn't get a concussion. She had really liked it and she had a feeling he had picked up on how much she had been missing it over the past few days.

"Er, yes, but what does that have to do with you?"

"Feel bad, is all."

"Like how you felt bad enough to buy me a designer pen?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about." His coat was draped on his chair and he was working on a biscuit tin from the cabinet. "That was just a momento to commemorate our first house together."

"Uh-huh. Sure." She reluctantly but carefully put the watch away. "You better not make a habit of this. I...appreciate the gesture, but I don't need any of this."

"I know."

"So this is the last, um, trinket. Right?"

He leaned forward, sleeves rolled up to his elbows. "Aw. You're cute as a button." He tapped her nose as she spluttered angrily, innocently picking up one of the maps she was pouring over as the rest of the team started to arrive.

After the case, she began writing the report as usual, because Lockwood always had some reason or the other to dawdle. But when she looked up, she felt her breath hitch. The scene was crowded, but he was somehow in her direct line of vision, talking to one of her team members, Catherine, who was laughing at whatever he was saying. She stood there, stunned, as if only just remembering that he had a life outside of her. Betrayal stabbed in her gut. Really, she only had herself to blame for thinking she was somehow special. Maybe it was the long hours, or the exhaustion that had caught up with her, but for a moment there...she could have sworn...

She didn't realise he was standing in front of her. He made some teasing remark as he looked over the report, but she wasn't in the mood. She was never bound to stay with him while he made his own additions to the report, but there was always something magnetic about him that fascinated her, and she wouldn't even realise until he was done. But not today. She glared at him before turning away swiftly, his smooth voice cutting off abruptly.

"Y/N?" He caught up with her, carelessly signing the report. "Was it- was it something I said?"

She turned to look at him, no longer illusioned by dreams or fantasies her mind had a particular propensity to concoct.

"Ugh, you're such a boy."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

She had never been a sentimental person, but as they ascended in the elevator of the illusions museum that was their final case, she was feeling some type of way. She glanced at Lockwood, whose eyes snapped up to her face, and she squinted at him suspiciously. But he took care to keep his face blank, so she looked away. She wasn't completely innocent herself, either. It was just the showy swagger with which he walked that drew her eyes to how his rapier hung near his hip. He was always one for theatrics.

When they exited the elevator, it looked as though they were faced with a dead end, until they realised it was just an oddly placed wall.

"I'll climb over, since I'm the one with any real height."

"You're just a fraction taller than me." So not true, which he picked up on as well with a short bark of laughter. Her neck would hurt from looking up at him if they were too close together.

"I'm nearly 1.9 metres tall, and-"

"Oh, shut up; you are not that tall!" But there was no real heat behind her words, and she rolled her eyes at his grin before he pulled himself over. Once they were both at the other side, they wandered around in a maze of mirrors, looking into every door they came across, until Lockwood found one gleaming of iron that wouldn't budge.

"I'm going to pick it."

"Lockwood, no. If the door has an iron frame; it's probably locked for a reason."

"What are the odds?"

"Very high."

"Eh, I'm not convinced."

"Leave the door!"

"Geez, relax. You're no fun."

"...you're picking the lock right now, aren't you?"

"Yep."

She groaned frustratedly, haphazardly trying to get to him through the maze, but it was too late. A shriek rang out in the deathly silence, followed by loud cursing from Lockwood. She caught glimpses of the Spectre through the reflections, which luckily seemed just as confused as them, though significantly more aggrieved. She somehow managed to find the room the Spectre had burst out of, though it seemed to have sealed shut again. She yelled to Lockwood, and tugged harder at the door, finally wrenching it open. She heard his footsteps as he drew closer, rolling in just as she shut the door against the Spectre wailing at his heels.

"Lockwood," she gasped in relief, "you are so full of shit."

Still panting against the door with an angry cut running through his eyebrow, he pressed his mouth against hers, and they were a mess of lips, tongue and teeth clashing against each other. Just as suddenly as it started, it was over, and he looked away, not meeting her eyes. Her vision swam. She had never felt so alive.

"You're maddening," he choked out. "What do you suggest we do, then?"

She was dizzy and felt sure that her legs were going to give away any minute now. "I- I don't...um...god, where is that humming coming from?" She spun around, the buzzing grating against her nerves. After some hunting, they managed to find a box hidden in a cavity in the wall which reeked of psychic charge. They wrapped it in their iron net and instantly the wailing ceased.

They took the elevator down in silence. She watched him from the corner of her eye. His eyes swept her from head to toe with a dark, unrecognisable expression, before he turned to face the doors like her. What was it? Disdain? Interest? Contempt? Awe? She wanted to shake an answer out of him.

"It's hard to be on the same wavelength with someone who insists on arguing with me about everything."

“Look, I’m not the one who decided that you were a terrible person from the get-go.”

“I did not do that. I looked at the evidence and made an educated guess. Besides, I never meant to be so blatant with it. I’m just…an expressive person.”

She regretted the words as soon as they left her mouth, grimacing as she heard the smile in his voice.

“Expressive, huh?”

“Oh, sod off.”

He clicked his tongue. She wanted to rip it out with her teeth. "You can be so adorable when you're nice."

"Oh yeah? What am I when I'm not nice?"

The elevator doors opened. Suddenly, his warm breath was ghosting the exposed sliver of her shoulder.

"Hot as fuck."

She briefly short-circuited, Lockwood long gone by the time she came to her senses. She hurried out, kicking herself over how heavily she was breathing over a stupid whisper like that.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was a full month before she saw him again, and she never got fully used to working with just her team again. She would turn, wondering why Lockwood was remarkably quiet, or waiting for some smartass comment, but it would never come, and it rubbed at something raw inside of her. She hadn't laughed the way she did with him since he left, and the memory of his bruising kiss hovered at the back of her mind. Not that she missed him or anything, ew. She was glad he was gone. So glad. Good...riddance.

She entered her flat, fumbling for the light switch, sighing at the pile of letters that stood abandoned on her desk. It didn't take long for some part of her to long to reach out to Lockwood, but every letter she wrote was disgustingly sappy. Sometimes, in a fit of desperation she would put on her coat, determined to post her latest letter, but the resolve would fade before she even stepped out. She'd be an embarrassment to Fittes and he would awkwardly explain how she wasn't anyone special and she would never live it down. How humiliating to be rejected by someone who made her life a living hell.

She stabbed her latest letter on her mantle with a newfound passion for vengeance. This was all his fault, the sick bastard. She was going to get him back.

The opportunity somehow presented itself by fate. The next day had just happened to be her day off, when she received a panicked phone call from Lucy. She had to return home for some emergency but George was down with the flu, and Lockwood was away at a client meeting, so would it be alright if she came over for a few hours, just until Lockwood got back?

She went over and calmed a frantic Lucy rushed off her feet enough for her to get to the train station. George was taking a nap, and though Lucy had mentioned that he'd make some soup for himself when he woke, she decided to make herself useful. She was just finishing up the touches on some spaghetti for herself and Lockwood when he arrived. He looked a little stunned to see her, and she couldn't quite find her voice either. He looked more sombre, somehow, like the last month had weighed heavily on him.

"...hey."

"Hey."

"I'm sorry about all this, it's just there was a strike, and the trains were all-"

"Oh, no worries."

"Thank you for the - is that soup?"

"Yes, and some, erm, watery spaghetti-"

"No, it looks amazing, really. You shouldn't have..."

"It was no trouble." They paused as they heard a thump coming from George's door. She left to check on him.

"George? Is everything all right? Is it the soup?"

George coughed, calling out in a raspy voice. "Soup's wonderful, thank you. That isn't Ned, is it?"

"Hm? Oh, no, Lockwood's just come home. But he came around earlier today. He wanted to see how you were doing but you were asleep."

"Oh," he wheezed. "Well, you tell him to piss off if he comes back. And maybe you can tell him I'm doing alright." He took a sip of the soup and closed his eyes. "Try not to murder Lockwood till I'm better. I want a front-row seat."

She smiled to herself as she walked back to the kitchen. Lockwood had put out two plates of the spaghetti for the both of them, and was waiting for her.

"Everything okay?"

She nodded. He picked up his fork, then set it back down, almost as an afterthought.

“You didn’t poison this, did you?” She flung her dishcloth at him, which he caught, but just barely. Damn his reflexes. But things were starting to feel normal again.

“Don’t tempt me.”

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Lockwood had a job to do at a cemetery that evening, and though he insisted he would be fine on his own, the look in his eyes was enough of a request for her help.

"You know," he was saying on the way there, "I've got another job two days later, if you're interested, that is."

"That sounds - oh. Hang on, I'm going to the movies with Terence that day."

"Terence?" She turned to see an uncharacteristically confused Lockwood, looking as though the wind had left his sails. "Not Terence Fisher?"

"He's the only Terence I know. No worries, I think we can shift-"

"No." A stubborn streak that had lied dormant since their reunion emerged, rearing its ugly head. "It's fine. I think it's just a Type One anyway."

"Oh. I mean, you can never be too sure-"

"I'll be fine. I can handle it. You go enjoy your...your date with Terence." He looked so disgusted, and that only enraged her further. They were getting along so well. What was his problem? She responded to his cold shoulder with one of her own, glaring out the cab window.

Despite her anger, the case went smoothly if a bit quieter than normal, and she enjoyed their familiar rhythm that she had so dearly missed. Somewhere in the middle, Lockwood looked as though his anger had thawed, but then his features changed, like he had just remembered something, and he walked away frostily. She swore, biting her tongue. Fucking Lockwood.

She wandered around, kicking at pebbles, while waiting for Lockwood to straighten out his fees with the client when her heart stopped. It couldn't be. She pulled back the vines creeping around one of the headstones in an unmarked plot. The grave of Celia Lockwood.

Once she had gotten over her shock, the words seemed to flow out of her mouth of their own accord. "Um, hi." She cleared her throat. "This is probably...the most disrespectful thing I've done, but, uh, I have to ask about your son. Why the fuck is he so aggravating?" She laughed nervously, hoping Celia Lockwood wouldn't be hunting her down in her sleep for this. "He sucks. I'm sorry, I know it's terrible to say, and I'm sure you were lovely people who gave him the most loving home he could wish for...but god does he suck."

"Y/N?" Lockwood called from a distance. She waved to the headstones before hurrying back, before he could see where she had been loitering.

"I need to drop the report off at DEPRAC. Want to come with? Unless you're off to meet Terence, that is." He looked away. There it was again. Gosh, would it kill him to not pick a fight for once?

"No, I'm not meeting Terence. Not that it's any of your business."

He muttered under his breath, yanking the cab door open more viciously than needed. She could feel her temper bubbling under the surface and Lockwood's was clearly only barely restrained.

"You know," he had started, jaw ticking promisingly, once they were in the elevator. "I don't understand what your problem is."

"Me? I'm not the one throwing a tantrum like a baby."

He sharply inhaled, and she defiantly stared at him, daring him to speak. The doors opened again, and a crowd of people entered, pressing them to the back of the elevator. He seemed to decide against whatever he was going to say.

"Y/N L/N..." he murmured, exhaling through his teeth. They were nearly touching, but not quite, but she could feel the vibrations of him talking. "You are one tough nut to crack."

"Bite me." Her whisper was rougher than intended, but she was unable to tear her thoughts away from her irritation with him. Why was she feeling so shaken up? Stupid Lockwood was stupid, big deal; it wasn't anything new.

"Oh, I think I'd leave that to Terence."

"What is your obsession -" She felt this wave of euphoria wash over her as realisation struck. "Oh my god. Oh. My god. You're jealous."

"Am not." But he looked too disturbed to seem even remotely convincing. They had reached their floor and he was quickly walking away from her, and for once she didn't mind running to keep up with his long strides. Her eyes glittered with glee. Oh, this was absolutely delicious.

"You are so. You can't stand the thought of Terence and I together, can you?" She crowed, only mildly breathless, relishing his discomfort, her words honey on her tongue. Ah, at last, sweet, sweet revenge for his months of hell. "Does it hurt? Does it sting? Does it eat away at you on the ins-"

"Please. Like you've never been jealous either." The gleam in his eye looked so knowing that she felt herself falter.

"How'd you know?"

"I didn't. I...what was it? Ah, yes, 'looked at the evidence and made an educated guess.'"

She shoved his shoulder, and he just laughed. "Still not as down bad as you, idiot."

He slammed the report on the counter, frightening the poor receptionist. "I am not 'down bad.' But you can't pretend like who you're seeing is none of my business."

"But it isn't! Why do you care so much anyway, huh?"

"I just do."

"Then make it your business." Something unstable was climbing up her throat, and the nervous look in his eye told her that he was thinking about the same thing as her - that time he had pulled her lips to his.

"I...I can't."

"Why not?"

"Because...because you're the most insufferable person I've ever had the misfortune of meeting-"

"At least I'm not a completely emotionally avoidant dickhead-"

"An emotionally avoidant dickhead whose throat you stuck your tongue down-"

She shrieked, and before she knew what she was doing, she was pulling her arm back, and she heard the thud of her fist connecting with his cheekbone. From the corner of her eye, she saw a figure that looked suspiciously like Barnes hurriedly back out of the lobby.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was all over before it even began. The uppercut was enough to shut him up for the ride back to 35 Portland Row, where she forced him into a chair at the dining table and pulled out their first aid kit. She

"I'm sorry I punched you." Not even a little, but she had to be the first to try to make amends. Not that he would have the initiative. He just sullenly looked down at the table, twitching his cheek a little. "Is there something you'd like to say to me? An apology, perhaps?"

"Apologise for what? The truth?"

She clenched her teeth. "It was crass, and in public -"

"Big deal. I'm always crass in public with you. What was so bad about it this time that you just had to beat me up?"

"I didn't beat you up -"

"Oh, so I just did this to myself, then?"

She had promised George that she would wait till he was better, but she wasn't sure how much longer she could hold out on strangling him. "Enough with the snark."

"I'll tell you why it bothered you so much."

"Lockwood."

"Because it was true. It was the truth, and it hurt, and you couldn't stand it-"

For the second time in less than a span of an hour, she saw red. She stumbled out the door, grabbing the golf club that was in the stand with their rapiers, and there she was now. George wasn't too upset; he seemed to enjoy the view from his bedroom window.

"Y/N -"

"SHUT UP!"

"Y/N, please, let's talk about this -"

"Oh, now you want to talk?"

"Please, just put down the golf club -"

"FUCK YOU!" She continued demolishing his car until he finally wrestled the club out of her hands.

"What's gotten into you?" Lockwood cried, and he looked concerned enough to give her pause. She blinked her murderous rage away, regret overwhelming her. Numbly, she allowed herself to be guided back inside, where Lockwood made a cup of tea for both of them.

“Oh god.” She buried her face in her hands, the embarrassment finally catching up to her. Had she completely lost her mind? “I’m such a mess. I’m sorry you had to see all that.”

“S’okay.”

“I’ll leave now.”

“Hey - what for?”

“Are...are you kidding me? I just smashed your car to bits. I might be medically certified insane.”

“I don’t mind. I’ll put up with it.”

“...you’ll hate that. It’s rotten work.”

“Not to me. Not if it’s you.” She exhaled, watching the tiny daisies at the windowsill sigh and flutter in the barely-there wind. He aggrieved her like a bad habit she couldn't quite kick.

“You’re…a masochist.”

“I’m aware.”

“No, I don’t think you are.”

“Why else would I have held out so long for you?”

The teasing was back, and she let out a short, indignant gasp before walking towards him and sitting in his lap. Her eyelashes grazed his cheek as she traced the dressing on his bruise. Pity that his gorgeous face had been the only punching bag in the vicinity.

“I’m always going to hate loving you. You know that, right?”

“Know it? It’s my crowning achievement.”

She punched his shoulder and he let out an exaggerated wheeze that made her laugh despite herself. She shifted and leaned on his chest as they watched the sunlight glimmer over the shards that littered the driveway. He was both the light of her life and the insanity that drove her to destruction. She didn’t feel so bad about the car anymore.

Serves him right for fucking her up this way.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"So...Lockwood."

They hadn't been overly obvious about their relationship, but it wasn't exactly something they could keep from George and Lucy. Lucy was back from her trip and was tickled pink by the smashed up Volvo in the driveway.

"Yeah. Lockwood."

"You do realise that he is absolutely batshit crazy?"

She smiled into her tea. “Yeah. You’re probably right. But,” she smiled innocently. “I am my father’s daughter. Maybe I can fix him.”

#anthony lockwood #lockwood and co #lockwood & co #lockwood and co netflix #anthony lockwood x reader #anthony lockwood imagine #anthony lockwood oneshot #anthony lockwood x you #fanfiction #fanfic #guts #olivia rodrigo #get him back!

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arsenalgbt · 6 months ago

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Oh, it’s absolutely Deckai and Martindale, I only fuck with the elite ships. So, all I’m thinking about right now is Martin and Kai as wags, that’s it, that’s the whole concept. Declan and Aaron are footballers and Martin and Kai are famous in their own right. Martin is in a boyband or something and Kai is famous for something (maybe he’s a drummer of Martin’s band, idk I can’t decide) but they are known and have an established following. Martin refers to a boyfriend in an interview and Kai is absolutely not subtle about the fact he’s in a relationships and very much in love seeing as he posts bouquets of flowers on his Instagram story basically every week and alludes to the fact they are from his partner. Thing is though, nobody actually knows who they are dating because while they want it known they are in relationships, they aren’t ready for the big public focus on their respective relationships. The four of them end up on some holiday together and it was Dec and Aaron who actually took the pictures of them – Dec took the one on the boat because he thinks Kai is pretty when he laughs and Aaron took the one on the jetski as Dec drove their one. Dec and Aaron wanted to go really really fast and Martin and Kai value their lives so that’s how they paired off. Kai and Martin post like they do many of their hangouts and people decide it’s a romantic relationship and basically take it as a hard launch. The internet has fun with it and the lads think it’s kind of funny too. Ben sends Dec an article and refers to Martin as “his boyfriend’s boyfriend” and there’s just a lot of teasing that bothers Dec who wasn’t really aware he was processive over Kai until he’s pinning his hands above his head and fucking him within an inch of his life so he “remembers who he belongs to” in their hotel room

u know what. I've had this supermodel!kai / arsenal footballer PL winner champions league winner World Cup winner Declan. so this can totally be it AND IMMA BE HOENST - I can get behind the idea that Declan is possessive over kai when the plot is plotting just like this 🤤

Martin... not a boyband material (mayhaps a genius youngest composer who composed for idk Star Wars franchise lol) or a figure skating athlete. got viral after the barbie and ken stint with his on-ice partner hohoho maybe will be hard to have the 'fake hard launching' storyline lolll but imagine; a supermodel and his Hollywood composer bestie on a summer break in ibiza, posting matching pictures~

martindale and deckai are elite ships.................... IKTR!!!!!

#je suis #fic material #deckai #martindale #anyone feel free to write this @ me on ao3 lol

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grumpycakes · 1 year ago

Text

SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE VOTE 2, DISASTER BOOGALOO CONT. **UPDATED

DAY 3 10/19/2023 • OOPS NO VOTE • 12 Noon EST

< Previous (Day 2)

So McHenry saunters in w the entourage, calls them to order, and the Chaplin leads in on prayer.

Chaplin’s prayer is basically “we’re over it but got grant us the compassion and wisdom to get our shit together and govern for the country, Amen” just flower-ier and less sassy.

Still hate that we gotta have a prayer before govt work but

Still gotta have them pledge allegiance

AND THEN MCHENRY IMMEDIATELY CALLS A RECESS.

So what TF happened?

Jim Jordan in a moment of clarity (and probably some shaming from his colleagues) realized he doesn’t have the votes, and won’t for a while. So he has TEMPORARILY pulled his bid for the Speakership.

In the meantime, it looks like they are working on a proposal for McHenry to take over some speakership roles for a LIMITED TIME. We won’t know how long until the proposal is made/put before congress.

This move is most likely JUST to get the budget done and agree on how much aid we’ll be sending to Ukraine and Israel. Otherwise the Government will shut down and shit will go into free fall. This covers the asses of the Republicans while still not having to pick a speaker.

It also is taxing to force them all in session DAILY for at least 2 hours to do these votes.

SOME TAKEAWAYS I’VE SEEN

We could still get a 3rd vote today depending on how fast they make up the legislation

This isn’t great for Jordan, it’s a weak move to let someone else do speaker things while you beg and bribe people to vote for you

A lot of the far rights/hardliners are mad about the move to give temporary powers. Basically advocating for making everyone stay and suffer multiple rounds of voting again (cannot fathom why when it just made McCarthy look stupid last time, unless they truly just would rather burn the govt to the ground than do anything helpful)

Reportedly McHenry doesn’t want temporary powers either rofl

While the republicans will whine and moan that the Dems should have bailed them out (either by voting present for McCarthy or by the same for the new speakership votes) it is not their job NOR DID REPUBLICANS HELP THEM AT ALL WHEN THEY HAD THIS NARROW OF A MAJORITY. And they didn’t devolve into this kind of chaos

Dems are just asking to pass budgets and aid, and are probably just stepping out of the way of this train wreck

This has never been an issue till this year (and this partisanship/far right monstrosity the Republicans have fomented)

The next speaker will most likely IMMEDIATELY reverse that dumbass rule that one person can force a vote to remove the speaker

APPARENTLY some of the republicans that did not vote for Jordan have been receiving “Credible death threats.” Over it????? JFC

Yes, since they called a session to vote, they HAD to gavel in, pray and get set up to CALL IT OFF. And that’s hilariously stupid

ADDED EDIT 8PM 10/19/2023

Lolll fuck. So Jim Jordan had a “Closed door meeting” with the rest of the republicans to work out how/if to give McHenry additional powers and CAME OUT AN HOUR LATER SAYING THERE WILL BE NO SPECIAL POWERS. HE’S GONNA GO AGAIN. (Didn’t happen today lol) They apparently were fighting over whether or not it’s LeGaL or cOnStiTuTiOnAl to give the interim speaker powers. Loll but according to McCarthy when Gaetz tried to argue they basically told him to shut up. So it sounds like some of the repubs are still mildly homicidal abt Gaetz.

But a few things,

1. It’s legal and constitutional if y’all MAKE LEGISLATION FOR IT. And you can make the legislation be like ONLY THIS ONCE CAUSE WE GOTS PROBLEMS

2. I cannot fathom why they are so down bad to embarrass themselves. This doesn’t look good, this isn’t inspiring confidence, and since no one on the repubs are willing to budge or concede for each other you’re fighting a losing battle. You have the majority, use it.

3 . This feels like weird toxic grandstanding of if you just stand your ground it’ll bend but like, it’s not HAPPENING. And people will hate you worse for fucking w the government.

4. OH AND IF YHEY PASS THIS AND DEMS JOIN IN FOR IT TO HAPPEN IS RHAT NOT A WIN FOR THE REPUBS????? That they can get ANYTHING DONE?????

McCarthy talked to reporters and said it’s the fault of Gaetz, the “Crazy 8” (really classy dude) and the dems. And that he was taken out by less than a quarter of the house. But my dude. If it was 8 of your Repubs and then ALL THE DEMOCRATS. That’s. That’s a MAJORITY OF THE HOUSE.

Jim Jordan apparently did denounce the death threats agaisnt republicans.

END ADDITION

So that’s where we are @ u @ chaos-ville. I’ll make a new post or update y’all if they do a vote today.

Next (Day 4 Vote 3) >

#speaker of the house vote #October 19 2023 #10/19/2023 #day 3 #us politics #disaster boogaloo #oops no vote

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avesgraveyard · 2 years ago

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Avery, oh my god I think I have a love-hate relationship with this chapter like I love it but I cried through most of it and it frickin hurt

(I think I need to stop relating so much to Evan lolll-)

I cried through like the first fourth or third or this and then I was like oh maybe things are getting better but NO back to tears

DORCAS I LOVE HER SM I WANT HER SHES JUST SO WHOLESOME AND KIND AND I CANT WAIT FOR THE DORLENE CHAPTER DORCAS MAKES ME FEEL THINGS

“Me and Barty? Talk about feelings? Our feelings? Yeah, that’ll work out.” me with literally everyone ever lolll

Evans getting so frustrated and worked up over this and it hurts so much WHY Avery why do you have have to make me FEEL THESE THINGS

“This being the monumentally huge crush I’ve had on my best friend for– what– years now? The one I thought I had under control?”😭😭😭

stupid pretty Italian boys and their wicked heart-stealing ways. This whole thing made me cry so much but this made me laugh for some reason-

But poor Evan baby oh my god how he’s loved Evan for years and Barty never noticed him like that and that’s fine or whatever sad but okay

But then Evan felt like if he did all THAT to himself it would Barty love him baby no and that no one noticed for awhile until Dorcas but then how she helps him through it and Reggie when noticed god these friends make me so soft but that Barty didn’t really notice or didn’t seem too 😭😭😭😭😭

No, Evan. I think it makes you human.” DORCASSSS

Okayyyy Barty needs to be careful with ev like I get why ur mad but be carefulll but I guess he kinda does deserve to be angry to an extent bc like he just realized he’s in love with Evan??? And then he ran off but evan kinda did too but also evan almost kissed him??? How’s Barty supposed to take that???

Lolll evan one paragraph he’s actually kinda scared and then the next- hmmmm Barty needs a haircut

if Regulus was single– noooooooooooo

Evan making valid points tryna protect himself but he also just hurting them both

“ Please , Evan, just one. I’ll make it good for you, promise.”😢

Barty switched so fast from SCREW YOU LETS TALK to we should kiss 😏

and ev’s running again…..

When he punches Pandora plsssss

I thought you were– like fucking robbing me or something. EVANNNN

Marlene. Ring so cheerful not even noticing pandoras gushing blood at firstttt

“Subtle, James,” like always!!!

Silence. Evan looks up. Not one person is looking him in the eye, in fact, they’re all looking at his chest. Evan glances down. He can’t see anything. He glances back up. No one's eyes have moved.

“What? Have I got something on me?” He looks back down, then up again.

Barty is the first one to break the silence, standing in the corner of the room, with his arms folded over his bare chest, a pair of sweat pants hung low on his hips, a lethal smirk and a hungry glint in his eyes. Evan doesn’t think he can handle any of this at this time in the morning. Or ever, for that matter. “No, baby, there’s nothing there. You’ve just got a nice… physique, is all. We’re just appreciating it in all of its shirtless glory.”

okay first of all I SCREECHED and that Evan not even realizing but then Barty being soooo taunting he’s going to get what he wants and he knows it-

but the implication that evans doing so much better physically at least maybe then he was seventeen/eighteen yesssss

“What? Have I got something on me?” He looks back down, then up again.

Sure enough, Regulus’ gaze is raking approvingly over Evan’s torso, Marlene is grinning at him like she’s a shark and he’s her next meal, and James actually has a string of drool coming down from the corner of his mouth, concern for Pandora apparently forgotten. Evan suddenly has the urge to reach for the throw on the back of the sofa and wrap it around himself securely. Is he ashamed of his body? No, of course not. He’s worked hard to get like this, and he’s overcome a lot of things, physically and mentally, but the way Barty is currently looking at him makes him feel, well– a bit indecent.

AHHH THE REACTIONS OF EVERYONEEEE

(And then bartyyyyyy)

“Evan, you actually ran away when I tried to get you to have a chat about your feelings. Evidently, conversation won’t work. But that’s okay baby, I’ve got other methods. We’ll work it out eventually.” Okay then Barty ….

WONDERFUL as usual, Avery, you really know how to get me right in the feels and even though I cried half the time I loved this so much. Dorcas and evans relationship is so awesome and I love them Pandora oh my gosh I love her and I can’t wait to see how Barty tries to get Evan bc it’s going to be hilarious and it’s also going to hurt lol

ily, thank you so much!!!

dude this is so nice of you actually teared up,

this chapter was a mess, acsolutley 100% a brain malfunction on a page. but it was probably the easiest chapter to write. evan and dorcas' relationship was SO important in this, because Barty? Barty has Evan for when things get rough, and Pandora, and Regulus. And while, yes, evan also has barty, there are just some things he cannot tell him. so he goes to dorcas, like an older sister- younger brother relationship.

i get that after we hear evans story we're all kinda pissed at barty for being so brash about things, but he DOESNT KNOW. i just love writing their emtions, they're so much fun.

i so appreciate this you have no idea <333

#averyanswersasks #rosekiller roadtrip au

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the-inkwell-variable · 3 months ago

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Talk about a WIP? (For the ask game)

Absolutely! Thank you so much for the ask!

I'm gonna chat a bit about Dauntless, since the Big Month of Writing A Novel (unaffiliated) is coming up and that is, once again, my project. I've been working on Dauntless since about 2012, finished it three times just to delete or lose my draft and start again. This time I actually have a draft to edit and rewrite, yay!

Dauntless takes place almost entirely in Bluegrass, Kansas, a fictional city based on where I live. It's not a small town (I think we're sitting at 30k people right now?) but we are a suburb so we do get that small town vibe.

Since this is a zombie book, let's talk infection! I'm not sure how I'm going to implement this yet, if at all, so this may be the only place it's mentioned, but this is a parasitic infection. A type of worms mutated to survive the water purification process and is now in everyone's drinking water. Humans are still pretty tough, so it's not going to start as fast or hard as The Last of Us did, but people are going to be affected quickly. The worms grow inside a person to eventually wrap around your brain stem and wiggle its little appendages into the various books and crannies of the brain. Fun! Love this for us! Definitely not gagging at all over here! 🫠

The first stage of the infection (which I originally intended to be a related but separate thing... Might still go back to that.) is definitely a fun little horror show to write. It's somewhat inspired by Crossed, a comic in which infected people carry out their sickest, most twisted desires with a smile on their face. (Definitely a messed up series, read at your own risk. It caught ME off guard a few times, so please take care of yourself if you read it!) However, infected people in my story dont do it with a smile or out of pleasure (some do, but they're further along in the infection and were kind of messed up to begin with). They think their messed-up actions are logical, common sense. In most cases, they don't even realize that they're doing a messed-up thing. Some of their stories are quite sad when you realize that they genuinely think they're helping or doing the right thing. (Side note! I'm writing a separate book of stories that takes place alongside Dauntless, that focuses on these characters. It's going to be a ailabke for free when it's done, I promise I'll link it here!)

The second stage of the infection is death and reanimation, typical zombie stuff. This is a zombie book, after all. The zombies start off fast, quick, agile. Think Black Summer. They understand how to open doors, that a window can be an entrance, that dodging an attack can keep them alive a bit longer. They're not smart, per se, but they're not completely stupid yet. The longer they shamble around, the more they deteriorate and the dumber they get until they're your typical shamblers. In the far distant future, when the next trilogy in the series takes place (I might have dreams too big for my britches here lolll), they do mutate, but for now, they're just zombies.

Introducing Ashlee, our protagonist! She's not interested in any of this. She wants a normal, quiet life. She's helping her sister take care of her kids after the divorce (which she hates - she's not really the parental type, though she really is trying). She works at a clinic and is dating her boss, which even she knows is not a great idea, but he's handsome and friendly and wants the same future she does, so how bad can it be?

Now I'm more into the survival aspect than the interpersonal drama, but don't you worry, there is drama to be had! Niece Selina is a teenager doing teenager things, which Ashlee has to stay on top of so she doesn't make the same mistakes. Is boyfriend Dr Jordan Parker truly as altruistic and kind as he seems? What's going on with the cop that keeps sniffing around? Is Ashlee bisexual and/or poly, or is she simply desperate for a loving touch in these cold times? And will the author have the strength to keep fucking Chuck's grubby little hands off this document or will she have to burn the world to the ground to get rid of him once and for all? Find out next time, on Dragonball Z!

Thank you so much for asking about Dauntless! I'm sorry I rambled so much. I have a lot of thoughts about this book. I hope you're having a fantastic day ❤️❤️❤️

#talia writes #dauntless #tag game #wip rambles #loved writing this out #it really helped get some thoughts together #thank you do much 😊

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throwingupmyemotions · 1 year ago

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guilt lolll

i only cringe when i try to sound serious so i have this urge to write lol after everything but i also don't want to do that at all. but so basically ughh i don't even feel like using periods anymore

so im not going to

from now on im not using punctuation

ill just make a new paragraph for every thought

no ok this is getting annoying too

ok ill stop but pls know that im so unserious rn and every period i write is written with the highest level of whimsy possible. LOLOLOL ive never said whimsy before idek if i used it right but i couldn't think of the word that i was thinking of. omg this is so fun im actually writing everything that im thinking of!! i tried doing this in my old diary but i couldn't write fast enough to keep up, luckily im a much faster typer ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

OMG lemme start talking about the whole reason i started this. so basically this is just an intro for something else but i think about it a lot

so like i recently had a sort of awakening? kind of? like it was rlly just me growing up and realizing that the world doesn't actually revolve around me. but like in the best way possible bc i thought everyone's lives around me were perfect and i was the only imperfect one but now i realize everyone has their own problems which ik sounds like smth i should've realized as a kid but idk ig im just rlly dumb and self involved.

so anyway, i have always felt guilt pretty heavily like as a kid i would end up confessing to my parents anytime i did anything wrong because the guilt would literally eat me alive. ooh i have a rlly funny story

i was in like 6th grade and it was that time where i started getting all horny and curious. but the thing is i was suuuper sheltered like i don't even think i knew what sex was until like highschool and so i didn't know what was going on yk. all i knew is that looking at boobs made me feel some type of way( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) HAHAHA

OK SO I WOULD LOOK UP CLEAVAGE PRANKS ON YT LIKE EVERY DAY BECAUSE BOOBS IS A BAD WORD AND I CANT JUST TYPE BOOBS

its crazy bc i felt guilty but i didnt even know why?? like im a girl so ofc im curious about what my boobs will look like one day right??? no yeah that excuse stopped working after a yr when i realized i was feeling stuff yk so i completely stopped watching them

it had been about a month since i stopped and i thought the guilt would go away but it literally got worse. so i was lying in bed, and at this point i couldn't even sleep it was so bad, my stomach was hurting and i couldn't stop crying so eventually i went and woke my parents up at 3 am and i was crying so hard that i was like gasping for air so they were both terrified

i sat them down and it took me like 10 minutes to finally speak

and i told them "ive been watching bad videos"

and they started laughing

i cant make this up

it was so embarrassing

so anyway now that you get an idea of what my guilt was like then, its definitely a lot better now but it transformed into me feeling guilty about things that i cant just fix with a confession which makes it harder

ik life is unfair and thats just how it is and we're supposed to just accept it but its soooo hard like sooo hard for me to accept

and im so fucking lucky like im rlly starting to realize how lucky i am now but omg im so grateful for everything that i have but like i don't deserve this at all yk? like i didn't do anything to deserve this life and it makes me feel so shitty like im not a good enough person to get all of this and i feel guilty so i feel like helping ppl is the only way to get rid of the guilt but that's so selfish so then i feel like an even worse person and i feel more guilty and its this crazy cycle that i just made up but idk. im obviously self aware enough to realize that me feeling like i don't deserve the life i have is a me problem. and ik ive been obsessed with the idea of being a good person like my whole life but my awareness of the obsession only makes me feel terrible. like how can i even be a good person anymore if anytime i do anything good i think its fake? and another recent worry that i have is that i have a savior complex which definitely is what this paragraph sounds like. like i feel like since i got so lucky its my "duty" to help other ppl bc it could easily be me in that situation yk.

i obviously have a weird relationship with guilt and my own self image so i wrote this story a long time ago. like a rlly rlly long time ago. this is one of the first things ive ever written for pleasure bc i used to hate writing. so like its obviously not good but it makes me feel things so i wanna put it in here

standing on the damp stone floor barefoot, you look up to see yourself in some kind of cave with an eerie glow illuminating what would be complete darkness. you feel empty- or maybe blank would be a better word, nothing is in your mind, no memories or significant thoughts. but more than that, no emotions- even the realization that you are naked doesn’t bring panic. trying to think what your shivering wet body is doing here, bare and alone in a dark cave, you almost don’t notice when you see a figure approaching you. the unusual lack of anxiety as you’re waiting allows you to notice it’s odd movement almost like the unknown being is floating. now it is close enough that you make eye contact, and everything comes back.

all of your memories and emotions overwhelmingly flood your brain pushing you to a crouched position on the floor. as you cradle your head in pain, you squint up at the once unknown figure now in front of you. though you’ve never met before, you somehow instinctively know exactly who it is and what their presence means for you. the inevitability of the situation leaves you feeling less scared than you should be and more tired from the waiting. in fact you were exhausted, waiting practically your whole life for this, your fear easily overshadowed by your impatience. defeatedly standing up, you take a step forward, giving your soul to the devil.

he looks at you with what impossibly seems like sympathy. gesturing for you to present your forehead, you squeeze your eyes shut and raise your head. while you feel numb to most of your emotions, you can’t help but feel the shiver of terror that goes through you as you wait with your forehead bared. after what feels like hours you finally feel a soft touch to your forehead, almost like—

your eyes snap open to find him lifting up from the kiss. a kiss. on your forehead. he kissed your forehead. wondering if this was a trick to make the resulting torture worse, you look up at his face only to see it engulfed by sadness, tears threatening to fall out of the devil’s eyes. you don’t understand, this isn’t what you deserve. finally feeling an emotion, you are panicking. you had been waiting to be punished, getting what you deserve is what should be happening it’s what needs to happen. ‘it can’t end like this it can’t end like this it can’t end like this it can’t end like this’, repeating in your head. you hysterically look up to see tears silently flowing out of the monster and belatedly realize you’re sobbing too, echoes of your panicked wailing filling the cave. desperately trying to spark a reaction, you push the devil hoping he will retaliate but he only stands there, continuing to silently cry for you.

*LOL GET IT my guilt was my punishment but fun fact: my parents actually did this like they almost never punished me for anything bc my guilt was enough

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chironshorseass · 3 years ago

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Hi sorry I’ve been rereading pjo recently and it’s still so good and remembering how good pjo is always makes me so disappointed in hoo all over again. For some reason something that’s been really driving me crazy this time over is just how bad the power scaling is in hoo, and I’m sure that this has been talked about already but I just wanted to get the thoughts out of my head and you seemed like a good place to rant to sorry, also it has been a hot minute since I actually read hoo so sorry if I got anything wrong.

It just, it’s so bad. In just the span of son Frank learns to shapeshift into literally any animal he wants (including mythical ones) with seemingly no repercussions?? I don’t even remember him talking about like getting tired. In less than a year over the span of the rest of the books Piper learns to charmspeak so well she can put a primordial goddess to sleep and Hazel becomes a master at manipulating the mist. I feel like I remember there being some nuance and development with Leo’s powers but I’m not sure (also side tangent, I wouldn’t be surprised, Leo was by far the most interesting and nuanced character in the series until Rick made his entire arc about being jealous over a girl). It’s been so cool to reread pjo and being able to SEE Percy getting more powerful, being able to watch him grow and learn to use his powers.

Also!! In pjo powers were clearly a pretty rare and cool thing reserved for powerful demigods, and that was cool! And it really emphasized that children of the Big Three were especially powerful/dangerous, which was like a pretty important plot point actually!! And then in hoo that just all gets thrown away, anyone can have super cool powers, godly parents mean nothing. (I haven’t read all of trials of apollo yet but it seemed like this was still a problem Rick was having re: Meg)

I’ve thought this before but Rick just like forgot how to make characters interesting and nuanced in hoo I think. He tried to replace an interesting personality and motivations with cool powers. In an attempt to make all of the seven as cool as Percy, Rick actually just made every character, including Percy, bland and samey with little nuance.

Sorry this is so long and rambling, I have a lot of feelings about hoo :P

don’t apologize!!!! u r so right and i always want to rant abt this when hoo is talked about lmaoo. percy and the rest of the characters fell into this same line of sameness and boringness, and annabeth not having powers was even addressed when it didn’t need to be addressed before??? it’s seen as an insecurity (for her) while at the same time in moa she proves that she can work without powers? ok ig. idk ur right it wasn’t nuanced at all, bc annabeth should’ve been the norm: someone with little to no “supernatural” power. ok, have piper charmspeak, but why depend on that entirely? piper is “cunning” per se, but rick doesn’t explore that tbh BECAUSE of her charm speaking ability!!! leo as a character was so interesting and i have a post abt him but yeah, basically his arch was ruined by the fanon, racist version i think. rick just turned his eye on the fans and decided to make everything according to them and not what was ACTUALLY meant to happen. also the rest of the characters: i think hazel being That Powerful makes sense, but this is the big three kids we’re talking about!! ofc she needs to be powerful, but yeah, her power growth was fast and it wasn’t addressed. it was almost like she was unappreciated and put to the sidelines in the end bc again. racism. huh. jason was implied to be more powerful, and out of all the big three kids i think he was the weakest in those terms lolll. yeah it’s. bad. power should’ve been like pjo, and if there’s gonna be powerful characters then their arch has to be nuanced and well developed, not abrupt like what happened during hoo🤷🏽‍♀️

#i also have a lot of feelings dw #anon #demigods #hoo crit

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cotccotc · 4 years ago

Text

SKZ + a ftm s/o !!

◌ ftm (female-to-male) refers to a transgender person who was assigned female at birth, but identifies as male. these people are awesome, lovely, brave, & valid !! (yes that’s part of the official definition !!!! look it up <3)

part of my eight as fate event !! ( requested by @lixsmullet ♡ )

genre/s: fluff, skz x ftm reader

warning/s: mentions of dysphoria, mentions of periods, one very brief implication of transphobia (NOT IN REFERENCE TO THE MEMBERS DW), use of various pet names, swearing, my dumb formatting and commentary uwu

wc: ~1.5k

a/n: i hope i did this req justice !!! i made sure to do a lot of research on topics that might come up in this situation so i hope everything is accurate, but also inclusive for multiple types of people within the ftm umbrella. the descriptions might not be too deep but pls know they were written with a lot of care. OH ALSO i included potential pet names they might use !! i really really hope y’all enjoy this :) lmk what u think !!

◌ CHAN

chan’s known for putting other people’s needs before his own, and this is no exception.

he’d be super giving !!! would buy you “world’s best boyfriend” mugs and shit !!! it’s cringe but you love him so it’s fine !!!

more on top of your doctors appointments or meds than you are tbh

boy oh boy… if you take/decide to start taking testosterone……

LOOK OUT HERE COMES THE T POLICE KJDF

he just wants to do everything he can to help you !!!!! whether it means literally helping you stay on top of things and being your at-home (emotional) therapist, or giving you space.

i feel like he’s very good at detecting how a person feels based on their face or body language, so he’d always be on the lookout in case you might be feeling off or dysphoric.

and, as much as it might pain him, he’d give you as much time/space as you need. once again, he has your best interest in mind 24/7 !!! he just loves you so much, you know? 🥺

potential pet names (as long as you’re ok with them !! that goes for each member.): babyboy (we saw this one coming), foxy/sexy (mostly sarcastic but also… True), sunshine

◌ MINHO

a thing that i personally love to imagine: minho introducing you to people as his boyfriend

if anybody ever gives either of you a questioning look afterward (either intentionally or not) he wouldn’t waver at all !!! he’d just stand there and keep smiling. because you’re his boyfriend, duh

constantly reminds you how strong you are !! how super tough and cool you are !!! because it’s true !!!!!!!

i feel like i always make him sound like the ceo of Boyfriend Bootcamp in my reactions but i MEAN???

for example, if you’re ever feeling down (for whatever reason. whether it applies to you being trans or not) he’d be like “MAN UP !!! YOU’RE A WARRIOR !!!! ……. a cute one <3333 bUT A STRONG ONE !!!!!!”

in general, i definitely see him as the type of person who’ll just grab your hand or hold you a little closer in situations where he thinks you might feel uncomfortable, and even if he doesn’t directly acknowledge it, you know there’s a lot of love and care behind the gesture.

also… you’re sad? here, hold a cat.

potential pet names: stud (as a joke.. but it stuck), anything that starts with “my” (like my boy, my baby, my love, etc.)

◌ CHANGBIN

ok listen

i’m not calling changbin lazy

HOWEVER

he will most definitely try and make you do “manly” things for him when he doesn’t feel like it- SJDJJ

imagine his raspy, tough, yet adorably whiny voice being all:

“BAAAABE…. BABYYYYYY….. come lift this fOR MEEEEEEEE”

ESPECIALLYYYY if you’re taller than him oh my Lord

BUT HE’D DENY IT AT ALL COSTS !!!

changbin, pointing to an object on a tall shelf: “BABE can you get this for me? you’re so strong you can do it <3333”

you: “short ass-”

changbin: “hEY”

ALSO if you menstruate, i personally believe that he would be very comforting to have around during that time !!!!! just chillin on the couch !!!!!! vibin !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

your very own personal heating pad <33 jksjfd

potential pet names: babe, bunny, hot stuff (sometimes used for moments of sarcasm !!! there are lots of those..)

◌ HYUNJIN

he’s very sweet and loving with you, which never changes despite anything you might be going through. like ,,,ever.

i can see him being especially sweet and helpful for someone who doesn’t want to or can’t surgically transition !!!!

would do everything he could to emphasize the fact that you’re his favorite boy !!!!

whether it’s through activities, pet names, playful jokes, etc., he always wants to remind you how manly and lovely you are !! lolll

i present to you a thought that just popped up in my head and Will Not Leave:

you might normally be the little spoon, but if you ever feel a bit off about your body or just don’t want to be held, THIS BOY WILL GET CURLED UP IN A LITTLE SPOON POSITION FOR YOU !! SO VERY FAST !!!

(is it also an excuse for him to be the little spoon? yeah maybe it is-)

potential pet names: hubby (regardless of whether or not you’re married sjdsdf), prince, things that start with “my”

◌ JISUNG

asks lots of questions !!!!!!! whenever he’s not sure how to proceed with something or has any general questions about being trans or how to support you, he’ll be completely transparent with you about it.

even though it makes him a lil embarrassed 🥺🥺

will overuse the terms “dude” and “bro” just to make you laugh… but you both know there’s a hidden underlayer of validation there

loves cheering you up when you’re not feeling your best !!!

also ,,,,,,Youtube Research Enthusiast

“hey y/n check this out! let’s try it :D” and it’s a two minute video about how to naturally lower your voice

and you go along with it because a.) he’s cute for suggesting it, b.) it could actually be useful, and c.) he’ll look cute stretching his neck for a few minutes and it would be a valuable use of your time to watch him do it <3 jsjdfh

oh also !!!! we know he’s just Like This anyways, but he will indeed take every chance he gets to kiss random parts of your body like your hands, shoulders, the tip of your nose, and anything else you’re comfy with :) he just likes 2 smooch, what can i say?

potential pet names: anything silly !! bubba, baby/babycakes, good lookin’, etc.

◌ FELIX

this is somewhat similar to what i’d suggested in my nonbinary coming out reaction, but i feel like he’d take a lot of care to make you feel more confident in yourself !!!

especially when it comes to your appearance !!!!! if you ever decide to try out a new hairstyle, different clothing, etc., he’d HYPE YOU UPPPPP omg

you: *exists*

felix: *silly smirk* “my handsome boy.. hehe” 🥺

bakes for u !!!!!!! will come over asap with freshly baked cookies if he even senses you might not be feeling your best !!!!!!!!!!!!!

we all know he’s a real cuddlebug, but since you’ve explained dysphoria to him (to the best of your ability), it’s very important to him that he doesn’t overstep with the physical affection

he might also suggest you use a code word or gesture to signify if it’s ok for him to get all close and cuddly with you !! he knows you have your off days, and the last thing he wants to do is emphasize your insecurities.

he loves you more than anything, and he just wants to see you smile :)

potential pet names: handsome, love, sweets (bc ya know,,, brownie boy things <3)

◌ SEUNGMIN

would regularly spend hours and hours doing research on trans rights, different forms of transitioning, other people’s perspectives (both in his position and yours), etc

honestly i wouldn’t be surprised if he posted some questions on a website like reddit or quora or something from time to time SJDK (but eventually he’d be much more comfortable asking you directly, especially since he knows not every person is the same)

he really just wants to make sure he understands how you feel to the best of his ability in order to best care for you !!!

VERY VERY diligent if he has to adjust to new pronouns. would practice that shit like it’s his JOB.

i think he’d just be very scared of screwing something up, which you might have to console him about from time to time.

you know he’s trying his best to a.) not make this about himself and b.) do everything in his power to support you

sorta similarly to changbin, i think he’d be nice to have around if you’re ever on your period !! overall, this boy would do his RESEARCH

potential pet names: baby, mister (for some playful sarcasm), bear (or baby bear, honey bear, etc.)

◌ JEONGIN

if you’re ever feeling dysphoric, depressed, anxious, or generally not the best, he will do WHATEVER IT TAKES to cheer you up.

you: :(

jeongin: “ok fine you have permission to poke my cheeks all day”

you: :D

jeongin: :D

is also very similar to changbin !!!!! he’ll very dramatically give up on a task that requires even the slightest bit of manliness just so you can do it for him…. because he’s laz- i mean thoughtful <33

ok picture something with me besties (and this is quite random so bear with me):

he buys you cologne. cute !! very sweet of him yes <3 …...but the Backstory-

he had No idea what kind to get, so he went to the store and tried on like 10 different kinds until he realized he could just swatch them on a piece of paper so now he’s covered in cologne and he buys the one he thought was his favorite but he comes home to realize it was the WRONG ONE so he has to go back to the store and test them all again until he finds the one

..all just so he could surprise you & make you feel more masculine :’)

anyways LONG STORY SHORT: innie best boy :D

potential pet names: bun (in reference to bread, of course. you must match.), handsome, sexy (BUT ONLY IF YOU SAY IT RIGHT BACK !!!!!! sexy loaf boyfriends aw <3)

tags: @stayndays, @hanniiesuckle17, @leggomylino, @freckledberries, @kisskissbanggang, @mr-jisung-main, @childofthecosmos, @kpopscape, @skzwriternet, @hyunsins, @sleepylixie, @sunshine-skz, @vera-liscious, @thatrandomoneinthecorner, @cyberskz, @seungminsaidsta, @somethingrandomworld, @ethan806 ( join my tag list !! )

#districtninewriters #inkidz #skzwritersclub #fluffyskzclub #straykidsland #*fics #*8 #skz imagines #stray kids imagines #skz #stray kids #skz ot8 #stray kids ot8 #skz reactions #stray kids reactions #tw: gender dysphoria #tw: transphobia #tw: periods

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