#farleigh start oneshot

[firemenenthusiast]

—“till death do us apart”

farleigh start x fem! reader

summary: sometimes even fate can be altered

warnings: angst. read at your own risk. plot twist. grammar of a non native english speaker

a/n: am i in my angst era ? also this is for mon cheri @farleighlover 😋 revenge for writing ‘numbingly obsessed’. this fic idea was like a bazooka shooting into my face i had to write it down

“What if we rewrite the stars? Say you were made to be mine. Nothing could keep us apart. You'd be the one I was meant to find”

the way the sun was shining brightly outside his window, soft amber glare richoceting off the balcony of his apartment told him that the even the universe was looking down upon them, blessing the entire day.-

it was cloudy, the sky hanging puffs of fluffy white, but not the type of cloudy that makes everyone moody, no. it was just nice, he thought, as he adjusted the gleaming links on his cuffs, black ribboned tux sitting perfectly on his broad shoulders. cocking his head slightly to the side, his tight dark brown curls bouncing out of his face making him shudder in anticipation. or was it nerves ? he couldnt really tell, too many staggering emotions filling into his head, fighting each other for a place behind those eyes. taking a last deep breath, he adjusted himself in the mirror before turning towards the door, pair of leather shoes carrying him away.

it’s been five years since your class graduated from oxford, or should you call it your alma mater now. it was probably the greatest day ever, being finally done with excruciatingly painful days of all nighters, pushing through everything else just to chase after submission dates. as much as you’re glad that it’s all over, the collection of memories with people there wrapping you like a fuzzy blanket. the only thing making oxford the best phase of your life is the people there. your friends, your dormmates, your classmates, felix, oliver, farleigh.

and farleigh.

everything was better because you got farleigh. he was always there for you, supporting you, making you feel like the luckiest person in the world that out of all the girls in oxford that he could easily get with, he chose you. and you chose him. i mean, it wouldn’t really be anything between the two of you if you didn’t give him a chance. as much as you liked him before the start of your relationship, you weren’t gonna let him in that easily. just thinking about how much you made him suffer to win you over made you let out a soft chuckle. you’d throw the bouquet of fresh flowers he’d left on your designated seat in class immediately after seeing them and god, was that humiliating for him. one thing farleigh absolutely couldn’t stand was being humiliated, or rejected. but he pushed through, he refused to give up because he liked you so much. he’s willing to fight through everything if it meant that you’d just give him a chance. he suprised himself with how much he was doing just to make you accept him, cuz he swore he would never be down so bad just for a girl. but for you, all that pride and need to maintain his reputation just got thrown out the window.

you and farleigh, it was like the two of you were made for each other, maybe it was your fault for not seeing that sooner but your relationship with him was everything to you after you gave in and give him a chance. it was like red blood, pumping oxygen to every part of your existence, he was like air to you. farleigh made you happy, made you feel all giddy whenever he’d wait outside of your class for you to finish so the two of you could grab lunch together, he was your yellow, your rock. at times you could feel your heart grow even fonder of him, slowly falling head over heels. his bright pearly smile fuelled your entire being, you catch yourself secretly grinning whenever you’d think of him. he was very charming, though sometimes so annoying and bratty. you didn’t care, if anything he was your annoying brat. whenever the two of you would spend the whole day wrapped in each other’s arms, you’d let out the biggest sigh of contentment after getting back to your dorm. farleigh protected you, shielding you from anything that was gonna hurt you, from physical dangers to the emotional ones when you’d struggle with your mental health. he knew everything about you, he knew the tricks and tweaks of winning over your heart. he was your guardian angel.

you’d also noticed how beautiful of a day it was outside, and you were thanking the universe for granting the both of you a chance for this day to be as beautiful as it could be. it was everything you’ve ever dreamed of, and it was exactly like how you’d imagine and daydreamed about it to be since you were a little girl. from the gorgeous white gown draped down your figure to the personally hand arranged bouquet of flower that you were gonna carry down the aisle. it was perfect, and so is the fact that you were gonna marry the love of your life. you couldn’t be more excited, scared and nervous. everyone had told you that it’s normal to be nervous, it’s probably the biggest moment in your life and you couldn’t risk it being even slightly ruined. everything had to be perfect, and they actually were. getting ready in the dressing room, you paced around to get your mind off things that you were overthinking about. what if you stumbled and ripped your gown ? what if you puked in the middle of the walk because you were too nervous ? in that moment you just wanted to tell your bridesmaid to go get your fiancé. you knew he could calm you down easily, he always did. little did you know that he was also taking deep breaths to cool himself down in another room.

the sleek black tux hugging farleigh nicely around his torso and his bust. the sleeves, perfectly tailored and not a single inch longer than it should be. he looked dashing, handsome even. but when is it that he doesn’t? stepping onto the venue, his chin tilted upwards, feasting his eyes upon the beautifully decorated hall. a small smile crept itself across his lips. it was just like how you always told him how you would like the place to look like when you get married. farleigh had always kept a mental note on the details, from the choice of flowers standing tall along the aisle, to the soft hue of innocent yellow dimly lighting up the whole place. you always had a vision when it comes to your wedding day, and he would listen to you talk about it, nodding away and even adding his own points on how he wanted his wedding to be. he had immaculate taste too, of course. chirping in to give you suggestions after suggestions just to make sure the vision of his and your wedding day was perfect. he didn’t really care, the only vivid thing he could imagine was the image of you standing in front of him, looking as pretty as always, smiling up at him as he vowed to take you as his lawfully wedded wife. it was innocent how the two of you would dream about this day.

guests were starting to fill up the venue, settling themselves down on their designated seats as few of them were seen chatting up with each other, smiles decorating their faces. both your families were moving around efficiently, making sure that everything was in order for the ceremony to move smoothly, while you waited in the dressing room, carefully adjusting and making sure that your make up and hair were put together flawlessly. “you nervous?” you heard venetia speak, as you turn your head towards her, smiling. your eyes trailed along the beautifully sewn hem of your gown. “of course i am, i would be lying if i said im not” letting out a soft sigh, your eyes glanced towards her. “how’s farleigh ?” you asked her, before she took both your hands in hers, firmly grabbing onto the palms as she cocked her head to the side, beaming at you. “he’ll be alright” she responded, shortly. “you ready ?” to which you nodded, offering her a quick smile.

the walk from the dressing room to the hall felt like forever, as steps after steps burned memories into your head, everything felt so surreal yet too real at the same time. as you carefully line your walk in the heels with the tail of your gown making it a sport, you began to notice familiar faces sitting at the back row, already beaming at you with their hands cupped against their chests. you offered them a warm smile, desperately using it to hide the all new emotions you were currently feeling. you were now already standing at the end of the aisle, in the middle of everyone, as all eyes were set on you. you tried your best to flash the prettiest smile, like you had practiced for only like since forever. farleigh’s eyes immediately set themselves on you, his eyebrows dropped as his dark orbs began to gloss, a small breath got caught in his throat as it seemed like he had forgotten how to breathe. he was getting lightheaded with how similar you looked with the vision he had of you being his bride. just when he thought you couldn’t get anymore beautiful, you began to walk down with the white veil over your head, fresh flowers neatly grasped in your hands. you looked pure, breathtakingly beautiful in white. it was almost like the angels had lent you their beauty for that exact moment, for you to wear as you slowly step towards the altar.

your eyes met farleigh’s, a knowing look being exchanged between the two of you. you almost laughed at how touched he looked, he would be caught dead first before this to even show that he had deep emotions for someone but for you, he didn’t care. anything for you. all the nervousness suddenly disappeared as you carefully step onto the elevated platform at the end of your slow walk, joining your fiancé before facing each other, huge smile plastered across your faces. all of that ruckus and chaos before your wedding day has led to this moment, as you take it all in that it was finally happening.

“Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to celebrate the love of these two as they come together in marriage.” the officiant started right as the two of you were ready. after exchanging rings, he started his vows first, which almost made you cry but happiness flooded through the feeling.

“…I promise to cherish you always, to honor and sustain you, in sickness and in health, in poverty and in wealth, and to be true to you in all things until death alone shall part us.” as you finish your vow, you could feel your feet starting to perform little jumps of excitement. turning your head towards the officiant, he could see that you were already getting impatient. smiling to himself, he looked over to the crowd before saying the magic words

“By the power vested in me by the state, I now pronounce you husband and wife !” you almost squeak before leaning over to kiss your now husband, gently pressing your lips over his soft ones, your cold fingers cupping his cheeks as a roar of applause filled the hall. the crowd stood up to cheer, bright smiles complimenting the decorations in the hall.

it was exactly like you imagined, except this time it wasn’t farleigh that you were kissing.

as farleigh clapped for the both of you from his seat, he couldn’t help the proud smile pushing itself to form on his lips, as his eyes begin to water. he immediately reached up to wipe them off quickly, yet obvious tint of red could still be seen if one were to examine his face closely. but he wasn’t worried of that happening, because he wasn’t the main subject of today’s ceremony, no. he was just happy to be here, cheering for you and your husband. he would be lying if he didn’t think about how it would be if it was him instead on the altar, kissing you away from all the doubts that he had put you through over the last few years of your relationship. he knew that you and him, the two of you were supposed to be endgame. it was supposed to be him, slipping the ring onto your finger, before kissing over them. he knew all that, yet nothing could win over a fight with his own issues, nothing could beat his own mind in a game called love. he wanted to give up on love long ago but you showed him the bright end of the tunnel, and he will always be grateful for that. for now, he would have to make peace with the fact that you’re no longer his, and he no longer has a place in your heart. it’s not like he doesn’t want all of this, he really does. hell, he had thought about this exact day countless times when you were his, just that he imagined it to be him who will get to say his vows on how he was gonna love you till death do the both of you apart. everything else was pretty much just how he had imagined it to be, especially how beautiful you looked.

the two of you had promised that the relationship had to end with marriage, and that after graduation nothing was gonna change. but promises are meant to broken aren’t they ? he changed, a lot. you did too. farleigh struggled with himself after graduation, with the fact that he didn’t have anything left in the uk, him being done with oxford left him no reason to keep staying with the cattons. he didn’t want to leave, he begged for sir james to keep letting him stay, saying that he would do anything with the best he had, building a career over the estates in saltburn, anything. anything just for him to able to stay here, with you. he was afraid that if he left, everything will be different and he’d lose you. so he worked, really hard. struggling to make his own money to put them into his own little apartment. little did he know, he lost himself in the process, along with what he had with you. warm embraces and chuckles after laughters turned into hurtful arguments. your usual warm spot on his bed turned cold, as your dent on his mattress slowly disappeared. it’s not like you didn’t fight for him, you truly did. but you realised that what the two of you had, was only nice while it lasted. and you struggled to make peace with that, but not as much as he was. you were everything to him, and losing you just meant losing himself.

when you told him that you were getting married, he looked really happy, as he pulled you in a tight hug. it felt safe, and you could feel that he was genuinely happy for you. you’re glad that after all, you were still able to be close with him, only now as friends. he was happy to receive the wedding invitation, having set it up on his empty kitchen table so he wouldn’t miss it for the world. he still loved you, so much as he wouldn’t want to miss watching you on your happiest day, even if it wasn’t because of him. even if it wasn’t with him. seeing you happy was enough for him. knowing that you were happy, he forced himself to accept that fate couldn’t be rewritten. how he wished it is, because then he would get to write your name in his stars again and again, and again. as many times as he could as long as in the end, you’d end up in his arms.

as the getaway car began to roll its wheels, he looked at you flashing the prettiest smile ever, waving at him. he returned the smile, masking in the reasoned melancholy down his chest. the car started to drive away slowly before his smile slowly pressed itself away against his lips. it has now turned to a smile knowing that he once had you, and he would forever cherish that. the crowd began to dissipate, some gradually walking away to leave, some getting back inside to continue their chats, some even talking about how gorgeous of a wedding it was, and that they were happy for you and your husband. farleigh stepped down the stairs to a gravely ground, his leather shoes digging into the coarse pebbles as he leaned back onto the stone post at the end of the stairs, his hand reaching into the pocket of his slacks. noticing someone approaching his spot, he glanced to the person to see felix, his hands tucked into his pockets before he reached out, asking for a stick from farleigh. he lit the cigarette in his fingers before reaching over, cupping his hand over the flame to lit felix’s.

puffing his first drag, farleigh chuckled at felix at the situation. “how you holding up ?” he heard felix ask, his light brown hair flipping over as the soft wind grazed their skin. farleigh tilted his head down, quietly playing with the pebbles with the tip of his shoes with a burning cigarette dancing between his fingers. “i’m gonna be okay” nodding, he assured felix. “that’s good” he chirped back, he knew how bad farleigh was hurting, but he also knew that his cousin would be caught dead first before showing deep emotions to anyone. felix were also sure that the two of you were really gonna end up together. it was only right to him. he wasn’t sure about what happened, but he could feel how bad the pain was violently ripping farleigh apart. he could only pray that it gets easier, as he didn’t want to lose him too.

“i know you loved her mate” felix started

“i still do” farleigh responded, his head hanging low

“-just differently now”

shaking the burned bits of the cigarette from his fingers, ashes falling down onto the ground as they both sat in silence, quietly enjoying the gentle breeze of the wind, blowing away all of farleigh’s hope for you.

taglist: @farleighlover @r4vn @love-me-pls @radioloom @imjustheretoreadsmuthaha @luckystrikerealness @juniperhasfallen @themoonchildwhofell @khxna @fuckshitslover @szapizzapanda

[dankspaceater]

Made a super bratty annoying mildly stalkerish farleigh bot on character ai...their NSFW rules are annoying but there is wiggle room if anyone knows of any recs for bot sites that have NSFW and don't have limited messages etc. I'd be thankful, enjoy!

[fvckingwolfstar]

3 am

pairing: hozier x sleepy! reader

summary: blurb!! late night fingering after a long day

genre: smut 18+

word count: 453

cw: he’s so in love w you, sleepy vaginal fingering

author’s note: go read my saltburn fanfiction pleaseeeeeee. its pinned🫶🫶🫶

smut under the cut

It was 3 am on a Saturday morning, Friday night. Whatever you call it. And Andrew was enraptured by you. He’d been enraptured by you for months now, having been dating you for nearly nine. Friday night, he took you dancing, then to dinner. Something you’d been talking about for weeks, and he wanted nothing more than to see you smile. Or to see your hair fly behind you as you twirled, or your dress to spin with you. The force of you pulled him in.

When you got home, you blew him and rode him as a job well done. It was perfect, as it always is with you. You had fallen asleep in eachother’s arms, but now he’s awake again. That wasn’t too bad though, he got to stroke your hair while you rested.

Your heavy eyes begin to flutter, a grumble of “what time is it?” falling from between your lips.

Andrew kisses your forehead lightly, “3:30?” he guesses.

You groan, exhausted, pushing yourself closer to him. You lean up and kiss him softly, humming as you both refuse to pull away. Andrew wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you in closer. You gasp as you feel him pressed against you.

He pushes his hand down your side and hovers over the elastic of your underwear, “Mnmf, please?” you mumble quietly against him. He pushes his hand into your panties slowly and rubs circle around your clit, you melting like putty in his hands.

He pushed his middle finger inside of you, his palm pressed against your clit. Your quiet whines turning into louder moans as he touched you. You bring your hand down to his boxers, “Lemme…” you trail off.

“It’s okay,” Andrew hums, steering your hand from his boxers to his waist. He pushes his ring finger inside of you aswell, causing you to fold into him, letting out labored breaths.

He rubs your g-spot with his fingers and your clit with your palm, sending you into overdrive. Your face scrunches up as he works you with one hand, shushing and comforting you as he does. With a few more rubs, you cum on his hands.

You look up at him with sleepy eyes, blinking slowly. He pulls his hand out of your damp underwear and goes to lick his fingers. Before he does, you take his wrist and suck his middle finger into your mouth, fluttering your eyelashes languidly. You pull his finger out with a quiet, yet obscene pop! and relax into his arms again.

His hand returns to your hair and he strokes your hair until you fall asleep in his arms again. His eyes finally flutter closed as he succumbs to sleep.

[ruerecs]

horrendously down bad for him. i NEED more fics of him and his characters.

[m-oddinsdottir]

🍒☀️💋.

HERS

Venetia Catton x fem!reader

Summary: another normal summer at Saltburn, however, this time the secret can’t be kept anymore.

Warning(s): oliver quick

Note: I just can’t believe no one has made a Venetia one shot yet

A message appeared on the screen of your phone, the blue light that radiated from it brightened up the frown in your face as your lips pressed together in a thin line. «Don’t get mad, love. But this Ollie you told me about, he’s here.» You couldn’t help but scoff, so, in the end, Felix did invite him regardless of yours and Farleigh’s complaints.

One of your hands passed through your eyes for a second trying to cover your sight from the bothering light. Then, you texted a quick response. «Fucking Felix. I’m almost there.»

You weren’t the best of friends with Oliver, at first, you tried to be nice, you were keen on making new friends and adding more variety into your group. However, there was something off about him; sometimes, you had caught him staring at you through the distance which wouldn’t be weird if he didn’t have that oddness in his eyes, that creepiness, that… You couldn’t even describe it.

So, of course, you told Venetia who reassured you saying that it was probably you being paranoid. Which would be coherent due to your tendency of freaking out in the most insignificant situations. If it weren’t for Farleigh, who thought exactly the same, maybe not for the creepy part but he also knew he didn’t particularly enjoy Oliver Quick’s presence.

Felix, on the other hand, seemed to have become so close to him in only a few months. It wasn’t a secret that Felix attracted people, not only due to his appearance but also because of his personality. He was extroverted, had a great sense of humor and on top of that he was kind, maybe too much sometimes. This last trait was the reason why he had invited Oliver “Er… It’s just that his father has died” You remember him explaining to you why it wouldn’t be just you four that summer which sounded like pity.

Venetia usually invited you to spend each summer vacation in the manor as you couldn’t visit your family because of them living too far away. You just couldn’t afford the trip. But of course that wasn’t the only reason why, the box dyed blonde and you had been dating for almost two years now. It all started when Felix invited you to a party in Saltburn where you met his parents and, specially, where you met his sister. It was an instant connection, you remember being in one of Saltburn’s multiple balconies when she appeared, her long gown shining under the moonlight and the cigarette hanging from her lips “And you are…?” She had asked uninterested “I can think about a tone of adjectives but I will let you discover them for yourself” Then, you told her your name and the rest was history.

Despite this, nobody knew. Not your friends in college, neither Elspeth nor Sir James. The only ones that knew were Far and Felix, however it was hard not to when you two were all over each other during the summer.

But now, with Oliver also there… He couldn’t know, if he did everyone would also do and Venetia and you were just not ready for it. More you than Venetia, after all you didn’t want everyone to think that you were with her just for her family’s money. Everyone would have thought that as you had never told anyone you were also interested in girls neither have you ever shown it as your whole dating history was filled with guys. To be honest, you didn’t even know it yourself until you met her.

Soon, you arrived at Saltburn. A soft smile was placed in your lips trying to act as if there was nothing wrong by the time you entered the place. Duncan, the butler, welcomed you with his usual seriousness and your smile grew due to the sight of a familiar face.

"You know we will carry your luggage, my lady. There’s no need to carry them yourself.” He said while a few other workers grabbed the bags from your hands.

“And as always you know I don’t like to be a burden.”

Duncan shook his head, a complicity look in his eyes. “A guest like you would never be.”

A laugh escaped from your chest and then you rolled your eyes playfully. “Lord, that’s for sure.”

Duncan waited for your luggages to be carried away before speaking again. “Let me escort you to the dining room, the Catton’s are having lunch.”

You raised an eyebrow as you started to walk with the main butler. “Just the Cattons?”

“I’m afraid not.” He answered so a sight was forced to leave your lips.

With the company of Duncan, you entered the dining room finding there the whole family… and Oliver. You restrained from rolling your eyes.

“Darling! You’re finally here.” Elspeth stood up to greet you, she hugged you and then held your cheeks with affection “How can it be that you get prettier every summer?”

“It’s just you Elspeth who sees me with loving eyes. And I should ask the same for you!” The blonde smiled as a response to the compliment before stepping away from you. “Oh, darling” The oldest woman laughed as you approached the rest of the family members.

Sir James welcomed you with a big smile in his face as you gently squeezed his shoulder. Then you walked towards Farleigh, hugging him from behind as you surrounded his shoulders with your arms placing a kiss in his cheek. “Finally, you’re here. I couldn’t bare it any longer” He murmured so you laughed “Don’t worry, we will team up”

Then you approached Felix and your fingers gently brushed through his long hair under the eyes of Oliver. Felix looked up with a pout in his lips. “I’m sorry. I recall what you said but…” He said in a sight before you interrupted him “There’s no need to, it will still be a great summer. I’m sure.”

Lastly, you eagerly walked towards Venetia who was waiting with a tempting smile on her dark lips. Her big eyes travelled through your body up and down as you tried to cover the excitement held in your body to finally have her in your arms.

You hugged her from behind, burying your face in the hollow of her neck. Breathing in her scent, your lips pressed a soft kiss in her pale skin being covered from her parent’s eyes thanks to her long hair. “I missed you” You just whispered before stepping away from her.

“I missed you too” She whispered back.

The moment lingered for a few seconds in time as you looked into each other’s eyes, despite this it was soon broken apart by another voice. A new voice, a voice that didn’t belong there.

“That was it? I was expecting something more… enthusiastic.” Oliver’s voice, of course it was him talking. You stood up, stepping away from Venetia as your eyes locked into his’.

“What do you mean Ollie?” A fake smile was placed on your lips as you turned around slowly to look at Felix, scared that he could have told him something but he looked as confused as you.

“Well, darling, if I haven’t seen someone so dear to me in such a time I would be more…” He spoke with innocence in his voice making a frown appear in your face “I don’t think you have a say in how I greet this family”

Oliver smiled while tilting his head, he had a confused expression as he looked around facing the reactions of the other members. “Not this family but your girlfriend…”

Your eyes widened in disbelief. How could he know? You looked at Felix dead in the eyes, maybe he had told him while being drunk. That was the only reasonable explanation, Farleigh couldn’t have told him anything and it was shown in the way he stood up, hands clenching and unclenching under the table “What the hell Ollie?!” Felix spoke more loudly than the tone he would usually speak in.

The room suddenly stopped before spinning around, you heard Elspeth call your name but you couldn’t hear any of the words that slipped from her lips. Venetia looked at you, she was worried, you could sense it but you were unable to speak or even move.

“What? I… I thought everyone knew” Oliver looked confused and you heard Farleigh’s voice filled with anger afterwards “Clearly not everyone did! But how do you…?” His question was soon answered by the boy “I was in the bathroom when Felix was talking to you about it… I just overheard it but it’s not a big deal, right?”

Once again, you looked at Felix whose eyes darted around the room in a mixture of confusion and worry. Then, you stormed out of that place leaving behind the voice of Elspeth calling your name and a fast trace of footsteps following you.

You walked towards the room you were usually assigned before someone stopped you grabbing your wrist and making you turn around. Encountering Venetia’s eyes, a shaky sight left your lips by the same time your hands began to shake. “I didn’t… I didn’t want it to be like this.”

Venetia smiled as she placed a rebel strand of hair behind your ear, her hand cupping your face as you moved yourself closer to her trying to calm down. You wrapped your arms around her waist, moving your head from her hands to hide it in her neck.

“Love… It’s alright. My parents they won’t be mad, I’m sure they even suspected it.” At a slowly pace, her fingers traveled through your back in a known pattern that made you sigh again. “I… It’s just, fucking Ollie”

“Yeah” She laughed softly stepping away slightly to look into your eyes “Fucking Ollie”

Venetia caught a glimpse of your lips before meeting them in the halfway of the path towards your room and also your heart. Each time you were with her, every single caress, every hug, every kiss, it just contributed to her sticking into you even deeper. Your foreheads pressed together after the kiss, making your even breathing mix with hers and for a moment you were unable to open your eyes. You just wanted to stay in her arms forever.

sorry if there’s any grammatical mistake or similars, I haven’t written in english for such a long time lol

pt. 2??

[im-getting-help]

Hi, hello, it's me again informing you guys that Mordancy uploaded a new oneshot :)

[celandeline]

do you think you could do a oneshot of using “the safe word” with farleigh 🙏 (btw i love ur fics sm ur my fave farleigh writer) 💋

you are inflating my ego - and yes i did make the safe word 'Oliver'

Using the Safe Word

About halfway through, it starts to hurt. 

Back flat on Farleighs bed, you grit your teeth and press your face into your shoulder as he fucks you, whining and moaning into your ear as he snaps his hips into yours. You shift your hips under his to try and make the pain disappear, but it only increases in intensity until you’re sinking your teeth into his skin.

“Oliver, Oliver.” You say, pushing at Farleigh’s shoulder. 

He backs off immediately, brow creased in concern. “What’s wrong?” He pants, eyes searching yours. 

You shake your head, shifting your hips again. He pulls out, a hand smoothing down your thigh, soothing. “I don’t know, it just started to hurt.”

Farleigh’s gaze shifts down to your hips, and his eyes widen. “Oh fuck.”

You sit up on your elbows, looking down at him. “What is it?”

“You’re bleeding.” He says, panic dripping from his voice. “I don’t know- did I? What do we do?” His looks up at you, wide eyes.

That would make sense then, why you suddenly felt like you scraped a knee on the inside. You can’t help but laugh a little - he fucked you so good you broke. You sit up fully, clenching to test the waters. It definitely hurts a little, but it’s not super bad. “I think it’s okay.”

Farleigh sits back on his knees. “You’re bleeding, that's objectively not okay.” There’s still an anxious edge to his voice.

“It's probably just a little tear.” You say. “Give it like a week or so, I’ll be good.” You smile, taking his hands in yours, running your thumbs over the backs of his hand. 

Farleigh gathers you up into his lap, tucking his head into the crook of your neck. “I’m so sorry.” He leaves little kisses on the side of your neck, apologetic. “I didn’t mean to-”

You run a hand through his curls. “I know, it’s okay. I’m good.” You say. “You should be proud of yourself - fucked me so good I broke.”

He groans, but laughs. “That’s not funny.”

“It’s a little funny.”

He shakes his head into your shoulder. 

“C’mon.”

“I hurt you-” 

“Yeah, with your penis, that’s fucking hilarious.”

Farleigh sighs, and lifts his head out of your shoulder, pressing his lips to yours in another apology. “I’m sorry.”

You kiss him again. “It’s okay.”

[nataliesfirefly]

You and I Walk a Fragile Line - Farleigh Start x F!Reader - Part 7

a/n: hey y’all!! im finally back yayyy and ready to serve you guys some hot and fresh ANGST. i would like to apologize in advance, this chapter is kind of rough. part 8 will most likely be the last part of this series 😭😭 pls give suggestions for what i should write next, like should i start doing oneshots or start a new series, and should i write for a new character??? just send it to my asks!!! anyways enjoyyyy ily all so much thank you for the kind words and love! ❤️❤️

word count: 4k words

warnings: fem reader, language, mentions of sex, alcohol, smoking, ANGST, fluff for like one second, suggestive stuff, farleigh is a bitch but so is reader, not proofread

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You wake slowly, your eyelids heavy with sleep. You feel an arm wrapped around your waist and warmth enveloping you. Sunlight creeps into the room, bathing the walls in golden light. Memories of last night start coming back to you in waves.

You tilt your head up slightly, seeing Farleigh sleeping peacefully. His long lashes flattened across his closed eyelids, his chest rising and falling slowly, completely relaxed in his deep sleep.

If someone would have told you a year ago you would be waking up next to Farleigh, you would have laughed in their face. It’s surreal. And yet you can’t complain as you watch the beautiful, serene expression on his face.

You shift, sitting up slowly, careful not to wake him. You both barely fit in his bed. You wonder how you managed not to fall off of it during the night.

He stirs a bit in his sleep and stretches out the arm that was flung over your waist. He groans softly and his eyes flutter open as you pull up the duvet to cover the lower half of your body.

“Morning,” He mutters, blinking away the sleep, his voice husky. “Hey,” You awkwardly reply, noticing that your own voice is a bit weak. You notice the dull pain in your lower back as you sit upright, and you grimace.

Farleigh just stares at you blankly, and you stare right back. You aren’t sure what to do or say in this situation, when the person you’ve always claimed to hate just gave you the best night of your life.

You reach a hand around to your back and rub it softly, trying to soothe the pain. He raises an eyebrow, and you can tell one of those smug remarks is forming on the tip of his tongue.

“Are you sore?” He asks, a smirk playing on his lips as he rolls onto his back. He raises his arms behind his head and watches you with intrigue.

“No,” You lie, shaking your head. “No?” His smirk only grows and you glance away. “Maybe.” You say softly.

Your gaze trails down to his stomach and his waist, the duvet covering the rest of him. You look back up to his face, and you can see him eyeing your body with a look of hunger.

Nope. “Okay, we need to figure this out,” You start, trying to push the horny thoughts out of your mind. Farleigh sighs and rolls back onto his side, facing you.

“What’s there to figure out?” He asks, making it sound so simple. You stare at him blankly and blink a few times.

“Are you- Oh my God,” You hold your head in your hands.

“You’re overcomplicating this. We hooked up. Are you familiar with that term?” He pokes you in the side and you bat his hand away.

“Shut up,” You roll your eyes. “Farleigh. It means something when you have sex with someone, okay?” You explain matter-of-factly. He goes quiet.

“I thought you would be mature enough to realize that,” You shake your head and chuckle at your own apparent stupidity.

“For you it might have meant something,” He replies coldly. “But for me, maybe it didn’t.”

You turn back to him, genuinely taken aback by his comment. Why did it feel so special to you? You think back to last night. It was so intimate. It didn’t feel like just another hook up. He made it feel like your first time, and he’s saying that it didn’t mean anything to him??

“Right, because you just get passed around, so it all starts to feel the same at some point,” You fire back. His eyes turn dark.

“Wow, fuck you too,” He says under his breath. “You’re just like everyone else. You’re just fucking shallow, not capable of seeing someone as more than just a hole,” You reply, your voice seething with anger as you climb off the bed and go to search for your clothes on the floor.

“Jesus, that’s not true,” Farleigh exclaims, but you shake your head as you step into your underwear and your shorts.

He sits up and watches you walk to the door once you’re dressed. You open it and turn back to look at him one more time before shutting it behind you.

You don’t realize the tears pooling in your eyes until you’re alone in the hallway. You begin the walk back to your room, ignoring the fact that your legs are a bit unsteady and your back still aches.

Are you just being a stupid, delusional girl who caught feelings for someone after a one night stand? You could usually just leave someone's room after sleeping with them and never speak to them again back at Oxford, but with Farleigh, it’s different. You wanted it to mean something. You try to push down your feelings and forget about last night, but it’s nearly impossible. All you can do is try your best to ignore him.

The past three nights, there’s been a pattern. You and Farleigh ignore each other the whole day, avoid each other at all costs, and then late at night when no one else is awake, he leaves his door open for you and you creep into his room, which eventually leads to you two fucking or doing something of the sort.

Of course, you two never talked anything out or solved any problems. You don’t know why you went back to him. You were trying to be nonchalant and independent, but you obviously failed at that. You want to hate him, but your craving for his touch and his body overrides all of your logical judgment.

And every night you tell yourself that it’s the last time. But you just keep coming back for more and he welcomes you with open arms.

Tonight at dinner, you act like he’s not there at all, like a ghost is in his place, and he does the same. You don’t even glance in each other's direction.

“So, the party is tomorrow night. Your friend is arriving during the day, correct?” Elspeth glances at you and you nod in response.

“Yes. She’s just taking the train and then getting a cab, I think.” You take a nibble of your bread.

“Remind me of her name again, darling,” Elspeth asks. “Oh, it’s Lola.” You smile and she presses a hand to her chest. “Oh, I love that name. So beautiful.”

Felix clears his throat. “I didn’t know you were inviting Lola,” He says. You look over to him and it seems that he is pleased with this information.

“Yeah. Sorry, I forgot to tell you,” You pat him on the shoulder. Farleigh sighs loudly and your eyes dart over to him before returning to Felix.

“It’s alright. I quite like Lola,” He smiles and you grin, thinking of how happy Lola will be to hear this information.

“Because you fucked her?” Farleigh says abruptly and Elspeth coughs. “Farleigh,” Sir James hisses.

“Jesus Christ, mate,” Felix shakes his head and looks down.

You awkwardly sit there in the silence, eyeing Farleigh from across the table. “No, I like Lola because she’s kind, funny.. She’s smart, too,” Felix finally says.

“Whatever,” Farleigh rolls his eyes and you can’t help but snicker. What’s his problem?

“You should ask Lola out. I think she really likes you, too.” You nudge him and lower your voice as a different conversation begins at the table.

“Does she?” He raises his eyebrows and his eyes light up. “Felix, she’s had a crush on you since like… our first year,” You explain. His face turns a red shade.

It’s weird to see Felix be so nervous over a girl. To him, all girls are the same, just little accessories for him to show off. But maybe Lola was an exception, the one girl he might actually care about.

“Well, I look forward to seeing her.” You can see that his smile doesn’t fade even after your conversation ends.

Later that night, you end up in Farleigh’s bed, sticking to the usual routine. You snuck into his room at one in the morning, which was the time you found everyone else was already asleep. Now you could guess that it’s maybe around two as you lay next to him, your naked body covered by the expensive sheets, staring up at the ceiling.

“You don’t think anybody could hear us, right?” You ask softly. The last thing you need is for Felix or, really, any one of the Cattons to find out about you and Farleigh’s situationship.

“Don’t you think it’s a bit late to be asking that?” You look up to see that stupid smirk. His face is illuminated by a slice of moonlight streaming in through the window, and he looks angelic. You can see the gold flecks in his eyes. He has a point, since you two have been doing this for four nights now.

“They definitely did. But no one has said anything yet,” He sighs and wraps an arm around you, pulling you closer to him. You smile at the feeling of his skin against yours and close your eyes.

“Do you think Felix would be mad?” You ask. He plays with a strand of your hair, threading it through his fingers slowly. “Why would he be?” He questions.

“Cause we’re best friends and you’re his cousin,” You explain, wondering why it isn’t obvious to him.

He tilts his head down to you. “Best friends?” He raises an eyebrow and you roll your eyes. “I don’t know.” You shrug. You assume he’s referring to you and Felix’s little fight.

“Did he really say those things about me?” You ask, sitting up slightly. “You ask a lot of questions,” He groans.

“No, answer me,” You respond while narrowing your eyes. “I might have… made some of it up?” He trails off, his tone making it almost sound like a question. You grab a pillow quickly and hit him over the head with it.

“Farleigh! You little shit!” He shields his face with his hands and laughs. “It’s not funny,” You sit back and cross your arms. He finally peeks out from behind his hands and shrugs. “I mean, was I wrong? He said it eventually, I just sped up the process,” He bites his lip to keep back a grin, but you see it in his eyes.

“Whatever.” You shake your head before laying back down.

“If it makes you feel any better, I only said that stuff because I know how it feels,” Farleigh says, his voice softer than before. “After all these years, I’ve figured out how he thinks. How they all think,” He explains.

You tilt your head as he continues. “They pity me. They only keep me around because they feel bad for me and everything that happened with my mom,” You feel a pang in your chest. You always knew this, but you still feel bad for Farleigh. In a way, you can relate.

“Just look around. I don’t fit in. But I try to,” The room falls silent and all you hear is both of your breathing.

“I’m sorry,” You whisper. He shakes his head. “It’s fine. What I’m trying to say is, I understand you.” He says it almost hesitantly, and you know it’s because he’s not used to being vulnerable with anyone.

“Thank you,” You take his hand in yours and squeeze it gently. He looks down at your hand and then back up at you, and you can see the gears turning in his head. Then, he withdraws his hand and turns over. “Goodnight,” He mutters.

You sigh and turn over so your back is to his. Why does he do that? It’s like he can’t make up his mind. Does he want to be vulnerable or does he want to pretend that he’s emotionless?

It’s a big turn out at the party, as per usual. You recognize a few people from college, mostly Felix’s friends. Everyone else is most likely family friends of the Cattons or at least acquaintances. You can’t even comprehend how one could invite so many people to a party. You’re not even sure you could name twenty friends off the top of your head.

You and Lola step outside, navigating through the large throng of people, gently shoving past and muttering the occasional ‘excuse me!’ ever so often. She arrived earlier today, shortly after lunch, and was greeted warmly by Elspeth and the rest of the family. Elspeth called her beautiful several times and seemed to really enjoy Lola’s company. Felix was hanging around them, joining the conversation every now and then, and you noticed how Lola’s face burned a deep red shade everytime they made eye contact with each other. You told Lola about Felix’s little crush on her, and she started jumping and giggling like a schoolgirl. She couldn’t believe it.

You inhale the fresh air, no longer trapped among the crowd of sweaty, writhing bodies inside. There are still many people outside, but less concentrated. Some people lay on the grass, while others stand and take sips of their drinks, as the footmen pace around, carrying platters of various cocktails, wines, and hors d'oeuvres. You glance around, taking in the dark landscape colored by large torches of fire and glitters of sparkly dresses catching in the neon lights.

“Wow. This looks like a movie,” Lola grins and looks around. “They really know how to throw a party,” She remarks. You nod in agreement. “They do, don’t they?”

She pauses and squints while glancing about. “Have you seen Felix?” She asks. You knew the question was coming. You raise an eyebrow and shake your head. “No. I bet he’ll turn up at some point, though.”

You both sit down on a nearby bench, peacefully observing the scenery. Lola turns to you. “Hey, you know who I think you would be cute with?” She nudges you with her arm and you sigh, preparing yourself for what she’s going to say. “Who?” You ask.

“Farleigh.” She says. You swallow nervously, attempting not to show whatever reaction you’re having to his name. “Oh. Umm, no.” You shake your head aggressively and she laughs. You can feel your face heating up and you curse internally. “Why are you getting so flustered?” She quirks an eyebrow and narrows her eyes suspiciously.

“I’m not,” You quickly look away, turning your face away from her. “Dude, the chemistry you two have is insane.” Lola whistles and you turn back to her. “He’s annoying,” You roll your eyes, half faking your disdain.

“You know, I’ve never told you this, but I feel obligated to now,” She scoots closer to you, and your curiosity peaks. “Hm?”

“So, back in… When was it? First year, first term. Oxford. Farleigh came by our dorm once, and he seemed very… concerned.” She begins, and she seems concentrated on recalling all the details. You don’t know where this is going.

“It was a Sunday morning, so of course we had gone out the night before. When he couldn’t find you anywhere, he walked all the way to our dorm, which is, mind you, on the other side of the campus from where he lived at the time.” She explains. Your eyebrows knit together in confusion. “Why was he looking for me?” You question.

“I don’t know. That’s the thing. He wouldn’t really tell me much, he was just asking if you had come home after the club. Which you hadn’t yet, so I told him no. He just seemed very worried for someone who claimed to hate you so much,” Lola laughs quietly to herself and plays with a piece of her hair.

“Oh.” You look down at your lap and process the information Lola has just given you. “I think he cares about you more than he lets on,” She tells you with a lowered voice and another playful nudge.

Felix spots the two of you from a distance and waves, jogging over. He smiles and dips his head to Lola, then to you.

“Hello, you two. Looking stunning tonight,” He observes your dresses, but especially Lola’s. His eyes linger on her for a second too long, and you notice.

“Why thank you,” You reply politely, raising your glass of wine to him before taking a sip. “Is that one of Venetia’s dresses?” Felix gestures to your elegant black dress. “Yes. She let me borrow it,” You answer. “Well, it looks great on you,” He nods and smiles.

“Lola, would you like to walk with me?” He asks, turning to Lola. She nods quickly, eagerly. “Yes, please. Let’s go,” She gives you an excited glance as she steps forward, Felix taking her hand in his, and they walk off together. You watch with envy. Although you claim to not want a boyfriend, it would still be nice to not be left alone at parties.

Sometime later, you find yourself in a pleasant conversation with a man by the name of Damien. He seems kind and genuine, and he’s actually interesting. He has a personality, surprisingly, and good humor. You both stand by the staircase, chatting it up and discussing all things school and personal life. Although Farleigh is at the back of your mind, and you haven’t seen him all night, you try not to care. You know that you aren’t actually in a relationship with him, so you can talk to all the men you want.

“Yeah, and that’s what I told them. You have to look at it from a different perspective. That’s what philosophy is all about, really.” Damien explains, and you nod enthusiastically. “Right. Exactly,” You suddenly feel a presence behind you and then a strong grasp on your arm.

“I’m so sorry man, she’s had way too much to drink tonight. I should probably help her up to bed.” You hear Farleigh’s voice and you turn to look up at him. The fuck is he doing? You’ve had a whopping total of one drink tonight, a single glass of red wine. What is he on about?

Damien raises his eyebrows. “She seems fine to me, mate.” He tilts his head and glances back and forth between you and Farleigh. You can’t help but notice he’s significantly shorter than Farleigh.

“She’s not, but thank you! Have a good night,” Farleigh replies with a bit of sass in his voice as he drags you away, causing you to stumble after him as he leads you up the stairs. Damien watches you two leave with a puzzled expression.

“What the fuck are you doing?” You hiss angrily, some people side eyeing you as you pass by. “Saving you from that boring conversation,” He replies, eventually pushing open a door to one of the guest rooms and walking in. He closes the door behind him.

“I was actually enjoying that. And I’ve only had one drink tonight, for the record.” You escape out of his grasp and step away from him. He crosses his arms and leans against the wall, looking down at you.

“Enjoying what? His knowledge about philosophy?” He scoffs and shakes his head. “At least he’s smart enough to talk about philosophy rather than the latest gossip or his most recent hook up,” You scowl back at him.

“And his outfit. He clearly has no knowledge on fashion,” He chuckles and sighs shortly after. You don’t laugh.

“What do you want from me?” You question, narrowing your eyes. “Nothing.” He shrugs nonchalantly.

Realization clicks in your head as a smile tugs at your lips. “You’re jealous, aren’t you?” You say. He freezes and you know you’ve just read him like a book. “Farleigh Start is jealous,” You say in a sing song voice and his gaze falters down to the floor. “Shut up,” He groans.

“You avoid me all day, all evening, and then you want me when it’s convenient for you, but you don’t want me to speak to another man?” You feel yourself getting more and more heated with rage with each word. You feel all the emotions you buried coming to the surface. “And not only that, you’re just emotionally unavailable! All you care about is–” You huff angrily, dropping your hands to your side.

“You can’t have it both ways. Make up your fucking mind.” You watch as his eyes widen at your words. “I’m not playing your stupid games anymore, Farleigh. Either decide what you want or leave me the fuck alone.” Your harsh words hang in the air between you and you let out a breath, looking down towards the ground. Lola’s words from earlier linger in your head and it makes you even more confused.

“I mean, am I stupid for thinking we had something?” You ask, throwing your hands up and looking at him expectantly. “Yes.” He replies flatly. You’ve never felt the urge to slap him across his face as strong as right now. “We were never a thing. Not even a concept. We never will be.” He says, resting his head back on the wall.

“So you just used me for my body? Is that all you wanted?” Your heart races with fury. He can’t even look you in the eye as you talk, he continues to look down at the wooden floor. “I hate you,” The words escape your lips before you can think about it. Suddenly, his eyes flick back to yours and he scoffs.

“You don’t hate me when I’m inside you,” He remarks smugly, a grin on his face despite the serious situation. “What the fuck is wrong with you?” You exclaim angrily after registering his response.

You decide to go back to the door, and just as you’re about to turn the knob, he speaks.

“You know what I think?” Farleigh says, his voice dark and cold, and you can already tell he is about to say something ruthless. “What? Please, tell me.” You turn around to face him, your vision blurry with tears.

“I think that you’re a slut who finally got the attention she wanted, and then when a whole relationship didn’t come with it, she blames everyone except for herself.” He takes a step closer to you, attempting to assert dominance with his height. He leans down as he lowers his voice, his dark eyes intense and cold. “But it is her fault, because she expects a fucking fairytale romance, but she’ll never get it, because those don’t exist. But she’s happy to play along and get fucked like the dumb slut she is.”

You think that you actually stop breathing for a second. His words slice through you like cold knives and his gaze pierces into yours. You inhale shakily and raise your finger, pointing at him.

“You’re a piece of shit, Farleigh. I wish we never met,” You blink and the tears overflow, streaming down your cheeks. White hot hatred built up over the years pours out of you and into your voice. He seems taken aback by your words as regret and guilt swim in his eyes. He remains silent as you twist the doorknob, swing the door open, walk out, then promptly slam it behind you.

You walk to your bedroom as fast as you can, trying to avoid the glances and whispers as you pass by. You’re sure you look a mess, you can feel the mascara streaking down your face with every tear that drops from your eyes. You open the door to your room, hoping to not find a random couple fucking on your bed. Luckily, it’s completely empty as you step inside and close the door behind you, locking it.

You try to tune out the loud bass echoing throughout the walls as you climb onto your bed, helplessly sobbing with your head in your hands. You want to text Lola, but you know she’s probably having fun with Felix. You wonder if Venetia has her phone on her. Nevermind, you think. It’s probably best to just suffer on your own and let everyone else enjoy themselves tonight.

It’s not like you can tell anyone about what’s happening. No one is even supposed to know about you and Farleigh. How are you going to survive the rest of the summer with him around at all times? You know you can avoid him. It’s just going to be difficult. But you’re willing to do whatever it takes because that was the last straw for you. It’s really over this time, and you promise yourself you won’t fall back into his trap.

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[firemenenthusiast]

—“reminisce”

jann mardenborough x reader

summary: what if the crash had an alternate ending ?

warnings: angst

a/n: i know i said i needed to study but i wrote this instead *sigh*

“And I'll be in denial for at least a little while, What about the plans we made?”

ringing. all you can register in your head is the ringing, stabbing away violently against your eardrums. small dots of black creep onto your vision as fast as the beads of cold sweat start forming all over your face-

the piercing, awfully high pitched ringing in your ears seem to begin getting louder and louder, as bodies after bodies clash past you in a frantic manner. your once steady breathing suddenly rip itself out of your chest, leaving you silently gasping for air. 

watching him pace around the parking lot was starting to leave you restless. though this is nothing new to him, he still gets nervous when arriving at the track for the race and somehow, he looked more nervous today, swinging his arms through the air in an attempt to shake the feeling away. leaning against the door of his Porsche, his actions tickled your insides as you let out a small giggle. “do you really still get nervous ?” you asked, putting the side of your hand on your forehead to form a makeshift shade for the blinding sun. “um of course ? especially when you’re here to watch” he answered, arms still swinging and this time he’s pairing it with little jumps. “sure, okay” nodding, you purse your lips at his answer before letting out a small laugh. it’s become a routine for him to shake off his nervousness first before entering his paddock, not wanting jack and the crew to even smell the scent off him. and whenever he arrives with you, you do your best to try to calm him down and be a good support system. you and jann has this tradition of chasing the tension of racing day by thinking of what to get after the race, you think of it as a way to celebrate. “what about sushi ?” you suggested, after a few other suggestions he’d rejected. “sushi ?” he cocked his head at the thought, “ooh that sounds good actually”. “i know” a proud smile displayed itself on your face at your brilliant suggestion. you knew he wouldn’t say no to some good sushi at his favourite spot. leaning off the car, you reached out your hand to rest them on his chest, radiating your warmth across his skin. “don’t ditch me this time” you joked to him, referring to that one time when he went out with the team instead of celebrating with you. you didn’t mind, but you enjoy watching him writhe under the guilt. the familiar warm chuckle that you love escaped his lips as he shook his head and snaked his fingers around your waist. he leaned down to catch your lips between his, mumbling a quiet “i won’t”, making your lips curl into a smile.

“you promise ?”

“promise.”

something about the jeep carrying you towards him makes your skin crawl, as flashbacks after flashbacks mixing with scenes from reality flash before your eyes. you struggle to pick apart what’s real and what’s not, your brain working especially hard to differentiate between reality and fragments of your imagination. the speed of the vehicle is making you lightheaded, even more so than you already was. you feel like screaming, absolutely tearing your vocal chords, yelling to the person behind the wheels to hurry up, but you know anything faster than this is the speed of light. turning your head towards jack, his head was trailing off, scattering somewhere along the gnarly marbles on the track before he turns to meet your eyes. his eyebrows are slightly curved as he offers you a knowing look. nothing could describe the expression behind your eyes at the moment, but they look nothing short of pure terror, masked by a fragile layer of sheer panic.

“and what did you tell him ?” his head jerked towards you at the question, pausing the wiping he’s doing on the kitchen counter. you’ve just finished washing the dishes used for dinner just now, a daily routine since you’ve moved in together a while ago. “i said, i want to do this. i’ve wanted to my whole life, you know ?” you nod at him to accompany your listening on his story about how he convinced his dad to let him race. “everyone freaked about how dangerous the sport is and how im just simply not built for that. but i guess people go crazy about their dreams. right ?” he uttered calmly, having settled the tension between him and his family. he no longer carry around that heavy feeling of guilt when his dad was disapproving of what he was doing before nissan, which was spending hours sitting in his room, turning the wheels on gran turismo. “mm-mhm” you let out, the last bit of his sentence makes you think for yourself, pondering on the truth about dreams. have you gone crazy for your dreams ?. you’re still searching for the answer till this day. the silence after that is comforting, just the two of you basking in each others presence, just as he finished cleaning the counter.

“im proud of you jann”

the string of words coming out of you slithers around him like a warm blanket, offering him some sort of reassurance. “yeah?” you him chuckle from the sink, shaking the water droplets off his hand before turning the tap off. nodding, you look up at him, your heels digging backwards as he’s reaching his hand out for yours. intertwining his fingers around yours, “knowing that alone is enough for me” he said. beaming up at him, the soft light from the kitchen reflecting a gleaming twinkle on your orbs, before you fall backwards against the fluffy cushion of the sofa, pulling him with you.

standing there, it’s like the scene in front of your eyes has dropped a crushing weight of a boulder against your weak body, halting all the racing thoughts in your head. onlookers are starting to crowd outside the grill, eager to see how much damage the crash has caused. everything is moving so fast, as you’re trying to keep up with the pace of your surroundings though it feels as if your body has given up on you. your feet are planted to the ground, but you dont feel like you can rely on your knees on keeping your body from collapsing. your hands are clammy, sweaty, but somehow they feel like falling off from frostbite. the fingertips are cold, you’re not sure if blood is even being flowed there or they’ve stopped the second your eyes tracked him down, his body limp on the stretcher, after being pulled out from the crushed carcass of metal. you try to search for any sort of movements from him, squinting your eyes for an indicator that he’s fine, that your jann is fine, but to no avail. amidst all the chaos, the deafening sound and voices booming away in your ears, you force your legs to carry you towards where he is, clawing at the uniformed man with tears streaming down your face, begging them to tell you that he’s gonna be fine. “please step aside miss” he urgently ordered, pushing you away from their path.

“hey– hey go find danny. we’ll meet you there okay ?” you hear jack’s voice, his hand grabbing at your shoulder firmly before saying something to the first responder. you try to say something but the dryness of your throat is keeping you from doing so. your eyes roam everywhere, having failed to focus on one thing at a time, with how fucked up your mind is, trying to process everything all at once. nodding your head subconsciously, your flailing steps start carrying you away from the chaos, the sound of the ambulance’s door shutting slapping you across the face. suddenly all the invasive sounds and voices screeching into your head start to distort, before that familiar ringing comes again, accompanying the numbness in all your limbs.

12 days. almost 2 weeks.

it’s been almost 2 weeks since the harrowing incident, the horrifying crash that brings us all here. some say that it was probably the worst racing accident they’ve ever seen, some say that it wasn’t nearly as deadly as one would think. some say that no one would be able to survive a crash like that, having trapped in a 1000kg solid metal, losing control over the steer resulting in a 500 meters throw over before crushing head down against the track wall. the accident was all over the news, being talked about all around the globe. it still is, but people are starting to let it go.

not you though, how could you ? it happened right infront of you. it happened when you were jumping around, cheering for him, a wide smile plastered across your face without a single clue on what’s about to happen. it could’ve happened to literally anyone else, but it happened to him. everyone has said the same thing over and over again, it’s like they’ve been programmed to. watching everyone come in, offering you hugs and rubs across your back, telling you that everything will be fine. is it though ? is everything really going to be fine ? if everything is really going to be fine then why is he still lying on the bed, neatly tucked under the covers, tubes decorating his face and every space around him ? if everything’s fine then why is he lying there, silent, instead of babbling about how smooth of an overturn that he did in the race ?

you offer a small smile at jack who is leaving. after jann’s family and you, he spends the most time in this room, chatting with jann about his day at work, how the nissan crew were talking about him and how the car is unsalvageable. he joked about how jann’s getting more famous now, with everyone talking about him though he hasn’t received any response in return. only the sound of the ekg machine beeping could be heard, drowning his obvious attempt at hiding the sorrow. his family spends a lot of time in this room too, they’re mostly silent but at times you can hear the soft sounds of his mum sobbing at the view of her unconscious son. you’d offer her comfort, swiping your thumb across her trembling hand, acting tough as if you’re not utterly convinced that you’re gonna die with how violent are the clawings inside the walls of your heart, ripping down the muscle completely. you’d cry too, hell you’d cry with her if only your tear sack hasn’t dried down from how much you’ve wailed on the first 10 days. especially after they rolled him out of the OT, informing his family and you on the side that they’ve put him in a state of comatose, so he could recover better from the trauma the wreck has caused to his brain. you’d cry again when you went home, carrying all the stuff he left behind before the race, storing them away one by one, hoping that you’ll get to see him use them once again.

“okay so if that’s an Audi r8, what’s that one ?” pointing at the car parked parallel to the previous one you pointed at, he squinted his eyes to try and track down the said car. as he noticed it, a small scoff left his lips, before beaming at you. “you don’t know that one ?” you shook your head cluelessly while looking up at him. a smile forced itself onto your face as he looked at you in disbelief. turning your head again, you’re pretending to take a closer look at the vehicle. a Porsche 911 GT3R. you’re lying if you don’t recognise that car. it’s the same one as the one you rode in to come to the tracks, and it’s the same one you’ve been riding in for late night drives with him. seeing as you’re struggling to fight the knowing smile from growing on your face, he figured that you’re just playing with him. “i swear if you really didn’t know what car that is im gonna make you walk home” he said in all seriousness, leaning back to take your face all in. you shrug at his threat, “no you’re not” hearing your answer, he pulls you into his embrace, your back pressed against his chest. you look outside, watching as the cars were starting to drive away, his chin resting on your shoulder. “you’re right” he responded, before turning his head to kiss you.

the weary beeping sound of the machine and the smell of antiseptic are starting to mix into your system as your eyes roam across every inch and corner of the room, the same action you’ve repeated maybe a thousand times. 2.56 am. you couldn’t sleep, so you decided to drive from the comfort of your home to come see him. your ‘home’ has been moved to this place, it’s been placed on the bed infront of you, being inserted with various tubes, in different sizes, that are supposedly to support him. he looks peaceful, he always does when he’s asleep. jann’s a light sleeper, being able to be woken up by only the faint sound of doorknob softly turning at times. this time around somehow, he doesn’t seem to be able to be woken up easily, even with the sound of glass shattering right beside him. you look at his face, your eyes trail along the cuts from the glass piercing through his skin after the windshield shattered into a million pieces in his face. a heavy lump in your throat starts to form as you feel your heart being tugged from beneath repeatedly. you could only imagine the fear that he must’ve felt in the car, hands desperately trying to gain back the control as it flips through the air. shutting your eyes, your breath staggering as a single drop of tear trickled down your left cheek.

“hey honey, im here” you begin, resuming your effort in chatting him out of coma. you reach out your hand to smooth over his forehead, his hair being pushed back slightly.

“couldn’t sleep, i was thinking of you” you force a pursed smile onto your face, trying your hardest to fight the frown 

“this is the longest silent treatment you’ve given me, jann. seriously” shaking your head, you let out a sob at your pathetic joke. letting the room falls back into the silence, you try to listen to the faint sound of him breathing

“i thought we were gonna get sushi ?” you continue,

“the restaurant has been opening and closing 13 times since we wanted to go”

“you promised not to ditch me, jann” the single tear that you’d told yourself to be the only tear you’re gonna let out tonight turned into streams down your face. you’re now sobbing, your face red as you gasp for air helplessly

he could listen to your voice, as he pushes himself to get up, and open his eyes. you notice a movement from the connecting tubes, that lead you towards his fingers, which are slightly moving. your body went static, not having the slightest idea on how to react as the movements start to become more significant. taking your attention off his fingers, you turn your head towards the headboard, to notice the movements on his eyelids. cupping your palm over your mouth, you try not to get your hopes up as it might just be spasms. as you tried to contain your anticipation, a pair of brown eyes stare down at you as they try to blink away the blurriness. his head that was awfully quiet suddenly being broken into by the beeping sound, which has become slightly elevated. roaming his eyes around the room, his eyebrows knitted as the pain from throughout his body starts to register into his brain. he’d realised that he was too weak to even sit up when his arm felt like it weighted a ton. you wished his family was here to witness him gaining consciousness, getting pulled back into reality as you offer your prettiest smile at him. he returns a quick small confused smile before his eyes dart anxiously behind you, like he’s searching for someone. as you try to spread your fingers into his palm you’re startled by his sudden flinch, retracting his hand away before be continues to look around in confusion.

“hi” you greet him softly, mentally face palming yourself because that can’t be the best you could do as your first word after he woke up. his head jerks towards you, scanning you across your face, his eyebrows still knitted in a frown

his silence is formidable, being in contrast to his usual chirpy self. you’d managed to grab a nearby nurse to inform that jann has woke up, and now she’s checking on him to make sure of his condition with a clipboard in her hand. he stays silent throughout the tests she performs,

before she asks “can you tell me your name ?”

“jann– jann mardenborough”

“do you recall why you’re here ?”

he paused for a moment, forcing his brain to give her the answer that he feels being stored so far at the back of his head. “a crash, i- i think” she nods at his answer, scribbling something down on the clipboard. “i’ll be back with a doctor” she informs, as she starts to walk towards the door.

“im sorry-” he calls out, halting the steps of the nurse before she perks up and turn to face him

“who um–” shaking his head, he tries to swallow his saliva

“who’s this ?” he blurts out, before gesturing towards you. you immediately frown at his question, taken aback as your vision’s starting to cloud

“jann,, it’s me” your shoulders are tense, stopping yourself from moving as you feel like one wrong move could send you down the pits of hell. you look at him with glossy eyes, hoping that he’s just messing with you.

“are you the rep ?” your face flashes pure panic at his follow up question, you quickly reach out for his hand, grabbing at it, thinking that maybe it’ll help him remember. “you don’t remember sir ?” the nurse chimes in, to which he shakes his head reluctantly, before slowly pulling his hand away from yours. you feel that familiar heat creeping onto your face once again as tears start brimming at your waterline, accompanying the growing panic you’re feeling. as you feel yourself tremble and what feels like your head being slammed down on concrete again and again, you scramble to find something to tell him about who you are

“jann,, im– im your girlfriend remember-? ”

“i don’t think i know you” his quick response makes you sob harder as you feel like you’re being punched in the throat

“wh- what about sushi ? you remember that right ? you promised–” as he struggles to retain the information, he feels like his brain is being mushed together to juice out the details you’d mentioned, before the beeping sound of the machine starts to become faster by the second. the nurse grabs you by your arm to stop you from saying anything anymore as she calls out for other attendants outside. as you stood there, eyes locked with his, you feel your body being pushed to the side by other people coming into the room. once again, you feel everything slow down around you, feeling the familiar ringing in your ears.

the sight of jann starts to disappear as he’s being drowned away by the nurses and physicians checking up on him. suddenly you feel like the corner you’re standing on expanding rapidly, carrying you away as you hear the voices in your head telling you repeatedly;

“nobody said racing was easy, nor it is safe”

taglist: @love-me-pls @radioloom @juniperhasfallen @imjustheretoreadsmuthaha @luckystrikerealness @khxna @fuckshitslover @themoonchildwhofell @r4vn

[leeofthevoid]

Cold-blooded Beings - Part 4

Farleigh Start x Reader

a/n: It's been a rollercoaster and I hope I delivered a decent chapter this time around. I was thinking about making oneshots soon while resting my brain from this series. I promise you...Things will go a little crazier from here. Please share your thoughts! I'm so scared to write SMUT.

Warnings: Mentions of Alcohol, Strong language, Violence

Word Count: 2521

|| Part One, Part Two, Part Three

Guilt and Glory

With the help of other butlers, Duncan helped you, Farleigh, and Felix settle in. After two weeks of convincing from Farleigh and Felix that you should stay at Saltburn for the summer, you finally caved. It saved you hours on the plane going back to your estate in Andalusia for two months. 

Three days before Saltburn:

Getting a phone call from your mom after your exams, hoping for congratulations and a heartwarming invite to stay at your family home in Vienna. "Hello, daughter, how have you been?" You cleared your throat and smiled, "Been doing well, Mama."

"Very well then, I must let you know that you will reside at the South Estates when you depart from Oxford." You sighed and bit your lip in disappointment, trying to save yourself from an argument you might start and lose. "I see; thank you for informing me ahead of time. Where will you all be, if you don't mind me asking?" 

"Your Papa and I will be in France with your siblings. There has been a problem with our family branch there; your father's side always wants attention to be on them." You can't help but sigh with your mom, remembering how your cousins who lived in France were so overbearing even though they only leeched off from your father with money, not even half your allowance. Fakes. "Stay safe, Mama. I love you. Tell Papa and the little ones that, too." She hummed and ended your call.

"Well, that was stressful," Farleigh commented while typing away at his laptop. "Sorry you had to hear that; extended families suck ass." Farleigh chuckled and looked at you briefly before typing again. "I would know." He took refuge in your room every chance he got because you apparently had excellent ventilation and better leg space. Very obvious by the way he called dibs on your bed. "You'd like that, though, right? Be able to tell the leeches off?" 

You turned back at Farleigh while you sat on the foot of the bed, confused. "What's that supposed to mean?" 

He raised both his eyebrows with a slight smirk playing on his lips. "I'm just saying. You were so annoyed with your family leeching off your father, yet you can't tell Oliver he's using you as an ATM." He raised both his shoulders innocently and bit his lower lip. 

The air turned hot, and you didn't like the room's energy. "Farleigh, he's my friend." 

"Or your pet project?" He closed his laptop with a loud click and looked at you, waiting for a fight. It was frustrating on your part to be asked such cruel questions, especially after your Mother basically left you on your own. 

"Leave it, Farleigh. I'm not in the mood to discuss this." 

He scoffed. "Why? Because it's true? You just got bored like Felix and preyed on the scholarship weirdo." A visible frown plastered on your face as you stood up. He slid to the edge of your bed, a smirk still on his face. "Stop!" 

"Are you scared to admit that he looked so helpless when Mr. Ware favored me over him? When he stood in the corner of the hallways without friends?" 

"Farleigh, what the fuck!" 

He stood up and started to walk closer to you. "No. I'm sick of you playing god. You and Felix think you could bring another kid into the group without problems?" 

"Farleigh enough!" 

He was before you, towering over you with that shit-eating grin. "Is the Monarch losing her cool?" 

"Fuck off, Farleigh! Just because the Cattons took you in doesn't mean you're not a leech, too!" 

He smiled at you and sighed. "That's why I like you, Y/N. You're rotten, unlike me, who begs, right?"

You looked up at him with a confused look. "What happened? W-Why are you like this?" 

Farleigh didn't answer and left your room. 

You found out that night from Annabel that Farleigh apparently overheard how you and Felix talked about his Mother. How Felix told you about Fredrica Start's pitiful fate and your blatant honesty of her foolishness, making Farleigh beg for allowance more ever since she got sick. 

You sat down on your bed while Duncan instructed the maids how you liked your room done; he's such a true gentleman for that. They took a few minutes to place things under the head butler's watch and hurriedly left the room when they finished. 

"Dinner is the same time as before, Miss Y/N. Please wear something appropriate for a black tie event." You thanked him as he left. Leaving you alone in the special room the Cattons gave you. Venetia always said it would be yours because you were part of their family. Starting to think that you've been too loose with your mouth about family. 

Speaking of Venetia, she lightly knocked on the door and opened it, finding you in the middle of the room. "When they said they had someone good for me here, I didn't expect they were telling the truth." You ran to her and hugged her tight, even lifting her off the ground for a split second. "Vee! I missed you so much! You look beautiful!" 

A chorus of laughter and giddiness filled the once-quiet room. Venetia pulled you to your bed and sat down facing each other. "Babes, I was a fucking wreck when you left. Felix and Farleigh were worse, but that day was the most horrendous. Duncan had to pry Felix off the gate, Farleigh threatened to commit arson, and I was inconsolable." She had a knack for exaggerating stories like your Aunt Elspeth, but it does put a funny image in your head. 

You laughed, but she tried to convince you more. "I personally tried to jump off the plane to go back, but the guards told me that I would break my legs." Venetia realized how silly it sounded and laughed with you. You missed her so much because she never honestly did act her age, but in a way, you liked it better. Being able to have an older person connect with you better.

You plopped yourself on the bed as Venetia inspected her nails. "Farleigh and I aren't on good terms." She looked away from her nails to give you a look of disbelief. "Oh, please. Farleigh could never stand not being with you. Whatever you did, he would have been over it by now." You dramatically gasped and put a hand on your chest. "Why would you assume that it was me!" 

"Between you and Farleigh, you never get butthurt with anything since you were little." She was right. Farleigh seemed to be back to normal when you sat next to him in the cab, clingy. Did you catch him at the wrong time that day? Either way, you'll confront him after dinner to ease your nerves. 

Venetia talked her head off about the things she's been doing at Cambridge, even told you about the boys there that you should meet since "Oxford men are so last season," according to her. You both got ready in your room when Felix knocked on your door to join the gossip session you were having. Felix may be a guy, but he sure does have the mouth to rival his Mother. The room was filled with gasps, giggles, and squealing when Duncan knocked on your door to fetch you. It's dinner time. 

Venetia wasn't a fan of dinner time, especially when Elspeth did nothing but shower others with affection and not her. Elspeth was so excited seeing you walk to the dinner table, all dressed in a lovely white cocktail dress and dolled up. "Darling, look at you! So tall and beautiful! You definitely grew to be a model like me." You smiled at Elspeth as she hooked her arm around yours to lead you to sit next to her at the dinner table, sitting beside her. You looked back at Venetia, who smiled when mouthed 'No way,' rejecting all compliments Elspeth showered your way. 

Dinner went smoothly, aside from the fact that Farleigh wasn't as…Farleigh to you. He talked but barely did the usual gossip and glittering of stories. You loved that about him. 

Dinner ended on a good note. You had to excuse yourself from Elspeth and Pamela, who quickly fell into gossip when you walked away from them in the dining area. 

You walked outside to the yard, where their pond was. Sat on the little dock and looked at the stars littering the skies. "Lost, Pretty lady?" You looked up to the familiar head of curly hair and a wicked smirk. A cigarette in between his lips as he looked down on you. "Hello to you too, Farleigh. Tired of ignoring me?" He rolled his eyes and sat next to you. 

"Actually… I'd love to have you all to myself before Oliver comes here. You get a little too invested in your pet project." You scoffed and shoved him a little. "You act like I'm not your pet project, too, Farleigh. Don't deny the fact that you've been entertaining me so you can get more sexual partners." 

He laughed and scooted closer to you? Resting that big head of his. "You like it."

"No, I don't." Shaking your head while suppressing your smile. 

"Yes, you do."

"Yes, I do." 

You both chuckle as he takes the ends of your hair, playing with it between his fingers, caressing it so lightly. 

"I like our tension. The fact that you're the only pussy I haven't tried yet." You groaned and pushed him off you as he laughed. "Yeah, well, it takes more to get in between my legs, Start." 

"Oh god, don't tell me I must be Oliver to do that." He said in an incredulous tone. 

"Farleigh!" 

"What? It's true!" You shove him again but fail as he latches his arms around your waist while lying down on your lap. A fucking tease and a prick for reminding you about your gap in strength.

You gently caressed his head as you made yourselves comfortable on the docks, "I'm sorry about what I said…I don't mean it like that, you know?" He looked up at you with those beautiful eyes. "You meant it; you're just usually not an asshole to make me feel it." You drew out a breath and looked down on him. To actually look at Farleigh, one must brace themselves to have their breath taken away. He was mind-blowingly beautiful, and no one can deny him of that privilege. The Cattons were all beautiful. A beautiful chaos. 

Farleigh thought the same about you. It wasn't like you were a hidden gem; you never paid attention to it. He was mesmerized by something much more than him. That the person he had at arm's length is so…Unattainable.

"Farleigh, I was an asshole, and I hate myself for that. Please allow me to apologize and at least make it up to you." When you told him that, he had this mischievous aura, but he kept silent. "I'll hold you up to that." You almost regret being a decent human being. 

You simply hummed as you set your sights on Saltburn. Farleigh returned to playing with your hair, braiding, and doing all types of knots. 

It was a good night. It felt like so many things had changed, and so many things had stayed the same. 

The next day was eventful. Felix pulled you all out of bed at six in the morning to enjoy a time together at the vast Gazebo they had near the pond. Farleigh, Venetia, and you all looked like the undead, slowly dragging your feet to follow Felix. 

"Ladies and Gentleman! It is with my great pleasure."

"Fuck off." Farleigh snidely remarked. Felix gave him a dirty look, making you and Venetia go into fits of giggles. 

"As I was saying. Ladies and Cunty man, I'm happy to show you all…Picnic paradise." 

Two maids opened the Gazebo to show you a beautifully set-up breakfast on a picnic blanket. Venetia slowly walked up to Felix with a smile and hug, sleepily hanging on to him as he led her to the blanket. "I'd love to praise Felix, but the sun is barely out to help me hide my lies." You chuckle as Farleigh slides his arm around yours and follows the two siblings inside. 

Venetia and Felix always had a weird relationship. They clung to each other since you were all kids while you and Farleigh felt like outsiders. Venetia fed Felix some food while Felix was lying down on the blanket, reading that Harry Potter book. "I reckon Mum would be upset that we ate without them." Venetia had this playful smile on her lips, mouth stained with wine. “Auntie Elspeth would understand; our special guest is too special to have a slimy ole English breakfast.” Farleigh answered.

All eyes turned to you mid-bite on a croissant, making you a tad bit conscious. "Seriously, can't there be a hint of privacy for me and my breakfast?" Felix propped himself up with his arms and turned to look at you. "Voyeurism is a thing of this family." He gave a wink, prompting you to throw a good pastry away…On his face. Farleigh and Venetia soon held to their food and chucked it at Felix. 

A food war at six in the morning! Elspeth said it was Utterly preposterous looking back at how much mess you made. The Gazebo was filled to the brim with food all over the wood panelings and the stained glass roof windows. All of you went out looking like a mess, and it got many questions from Elspeth and Duncan. 

"Eugh, I'm going to take a bath." The first few words that broke the silence while you were all standing outside the house lined up like school children. "Want me to join you?" You smacked Felix on the chest hard as you marched past him to go up to your shared bathroom with Fareigh to get everything out of every crevice. 

After the initial buzz from the morning’s event, you all sat with Sir James at the library to watch another movie he had set his sights on. It was funny; it really had the room filling up with laughter and some smart remarks from Farleigh. 

Then came the Oliver topic. Felix first reminded us about Oliver and his situation. How he invited him due to the loss of his father, thankful and grateful that your best friend was kind enough to cheer Ollie up. Elspeth gasped and was verbal about her sympathy, especially towards Pamela…Very verbal and elaborate.

Farleigh sat behind you on a chair, typing away on his laptop with a disapproved look, you checked his screen and they were all littered with Fuck yous and other colorful words. Guess he truly did hate Ollie. “And he lent me his bike, Mum! I was seriously going to get into trouble, but my savior just happened to walk by!” Elspeth gasped and rubbed Felix’s arm in a motherly manner. 

You can’t help how Venetia had a tinge of jealousy or yearning on her face. It can be a topic discussed for later, you suppose.

At the end of the day, you are reminded of a few things, and they all circle around Oliver. Not to be crazy, but…Why do you feel so nervous?

Previous | Next

[leiflitter]

Hi! Hope your car is ok . Meanwhile...

Any YAH Felix sprog (Harry, Ru, Ellie) facts? Favorite vs hated things, things they do with Felix vs Oliver, how they are when they grow up, what they think about Ollie's family and Ollie himself, relationship/dynamic with each other, their grandparents,

Venetia, Farleigh and Lu (just anything you can imagine). Marcus facts would also be very welcome.

Would you ever continue any of your other fics or do you consider them a one-and-done because you've already said everything you had to say about that AU?

Any other Cattonquick plot bunnies?

If you read Saltburn fics, any favorites?

Favorite vs dreaded part of the writing process?

Parts you're especially happy with in your Saltburn fics? (a scene, foreshadowing, characterization, dialog, Ocs...)

Alright let's whack a cut in- gonna do these out of order for speed purposes! There's a lot here so I didn't answer everything, but there should be a lot to sink your teeth into!

Extending my oneshots- there may be scope for more on top of em when I am finished with YAH but I will probably leave them be. I'm a firm believer in that Felix and Oliver probably wouldn't work out if they got together younger, but it's still an interesting dynamic to play around with. If I was going to continue one, it'd probably be Hang Me Out To Dry, though.

Other fics- I actually haven't read any others, mostly because I am on that #grindset for YAH 😅 it's something I'm looking forward to when it's finished, being able to rummage about and find authors to hype up!

Best/worst bits of the writing process- worst is finding the starting sentence for the chapter. Once that pops into my head, it's fine. Also, when I'm trying to shove them towards a plot point but they won't get off of each other. Best is hittin' that flow state, brain go brrrrr and words happen. I honestly don't really edit that much, although I am slowly going back through and making lil tweaks, but even that is kinda satisfying.

My fave bits of YAH are:

Any of Felix's dumb lil one-liners, but especially, "runny eggs at mach five."

The Christmas Party.

Felix and Farleigh's heart to heart.

The bathroom chat with Jeff.

The Lucia foreshadowing for sure- that was so satisfying to see people going "OMG I SEE IT" in the comments.

I also really like my lil supporting cast, I hope they feel real and nuanced!

So gonna just do a big ol ramble on the Cattonlets, because I love these kids, but it may not cover everything because even I don't know all of it yet 😅

All of the kids go to/went to boarding school, but only because Lucia and Felix agreed that they need the best education possible. They're home as much as possible, but that means Saltburn is often pretty empty in term-time. The schools themselves are "sister schools" so although they aren't coed, there's plenty of chances to see each other in the week.

They have very different relationships with Felix and Lucia. Felix kinda threw himself into "parenting" in part as a rebellion- if I'm gonna be a dad, I'm going to be a DAD. They had nannies, but mostly to be backup instead of the primary caretakers. Lucia, on the other hand, was still a teenager when Harry was born (she was on her gap year when she and Felix met) and was so desperate to be accepted that she went hard into The Done Thing. This slowly turned her into a slightly distant figure- the kids love her, but they cherish the times when her mask slips and she can actually have fun with them. They'd all known that their parents are together out of duty, but things only started to get really unbearable when Aunty V got sick, because then Felix was stressed and as such couldn't just shrug off Lucia's annoyance any more.

They're all very different, but they're a tight-knit little bunch. Harry's the princess, Ru's the nerd and Ellie's the brains. They're all pretty popular, but they're not as cliquey as Felix was- in part because Felix wanted them Properly Socialised from a young age (hence getting The Help to bring their kids over for Saltburn Summers). He also really wanted to make sure they were more emotionally mature than he was. Felix saw how his "accident" hurt his parents, and once Harry was born he had a bit of a realisation that he really had not been prepared for anything bad to ever happen to him.

With Oliver, the main thing is that he makes Felix far happier than they've seen him in ages. There was absolutely a Cattonlet group chat about it. Their general consensus was that they probably wouldn't mind if Oliver came around more, but that dad probably wouldn't ever realise what was going on. Harry absolutely had a very small, situational, only-available-option crush on Oliver that started when they picked him up, but that absolutely vanished the night of the Alexander Dinner. She kept it to herself because although it wasn't really fair on mum, all three of the kids missed their actual, fun dad. She assumed that if she got them together, they'd keep it secret like everyone else's parents, and it'd be a win-win.

There's an initial shock, obviously, and Ellie takes it hardest because she still really hoped that her parents loved each other. She's the slowest to warm up to Oliver properly afterwards, but Harry and Ru help because Harry has Felix's five-second emotional memory and Ru... well. Ru feels absolutely betrayed by Lucia, which means he's suddenly Oliver's staunchest supporter. There will be more about this later, once YAH is done and I'm into less established territory.

Oliver as a step-parent is actually a far better foil to Felix than Lucia, primarily because while Lu was concerned with appearances, Oliver comes from the world of Consequences and will give better reasons than "it would look bad". Lucia is also a better parent after the split, because she can actually take time to find herself as an adult and take time doing stuff she likes. They actually end up being sort-of friends, although Lucia actually realises she likes Oliver better than Felix after a little while of coparenting.

Oliver's parents are a little intimidated by the Cattonlets- and remain intimidated by Harry- but they are actual, well-versed grandparents. They're initially nervous, because these kids are rich-rich, but that actually means that the little treats and outings they do are novelty. "What do you mean, you've never been to Knowsley Safari?" "You kids fancy mcdonalds?" "Off to a car boot sale- come off it, you must know what a car boot sale is..."

They do need to find out about Farleigh, but we will tackle that later.

Marcus. I love, love, love Marcus and he will be showing up in later stuff but...

He is the stability that Farleigh has always needed. Think Patrick from Schitt's Creek in private, he's a wry, solid figure that Farleigh can rage at or break down on or just be near. He exudes calm like one of those plugin things people use to chill their cats out.

In public, he is just there for The Farleigh Show. People think he's an accessory, but he's choosing to be one. He and Farleigh are actually intensely private about their actual relationship, in part because Farleigh's need to be detached manifests far more around others. They are non-monogamous, but they're highly, highly communicative about it.

He's a solid country boy from a small town in Ohio. He has one older brother, and was the only out gay guy in his school.

His family are, honestly, amazing. Farleigh loves them so hard, because they gave him the whole hearted love the Cattons couldn't. He buys Marcus's mom expensive, tacky handbags that she LOVES. His dad doesn't speak much, if at all, but he has a faded bumper sticker on his truck that says I LOVE MY GAY SON. PROBLEM? and a less faded one that says I LOVE MY GAY SON AND HIS PARTNER. PROBLEM? that Marcus had made specially for Christmas one year.

Marcus' father has absolutely knocked out teeth at a PTA meeting. The same with Marcus's big brother. For both Marcus' dad and his brother... think Wayne from Letterkenny.

You will not have a problem with Marcus, because then your bigger problem will be a broken jaw. If you have a problem with Marcus and Farleigh, especially if your problem is because Farleigh ain't white, you're gonna need to set up a gofundme because you sure don't have medical insurance. They do, because Marcus' lovely partner made sure of that.

Why are Marcus' parents so chill? Simple, really. Marcus had an uncle that he never met. Nobody knew that Stephen was queer that way until he... passed away. The letters he left behind broke his little brother's heart. When Marcus told his parents that he liked boys, there was no question about accepting him wholeheartedly. They'd already known anyway, ever since he was a little boy.

[midnight-black2]

╰┈➤ NAVIGATION !

all works below !

┊ all writings┊• req rules • gran turismo masterlist • saltburn masterlist • voyagers masterlist •

┊ coming soon ┊• resident evil masterlist • detroit : become human masterlist • ATSV masterlist •

┊ current most popular ┊• to love - farleigh start x reader •

┊events┊• event page •

┊requests : closed, i'll be back soon ✉️┊

╰┈➤ (𝗱𝗶𝘀𝗰𝗹𝗮𝗶𝗺𝗲𝗿 : please read my rules before requesting. if you request a oneshot that goes against my rules, i will not be writing it. also, i've noticed some people have been pretty inspired by my work across my other blogs, which is fine. however, i don't appreciate direct plagiarism of certain sentences, or direct copying. if you're going to say something how i did, please put it in your own words.)

[firemenenthusiast]

| firemenenthusiast's masterlist |

i write for archie madekwe’s characters ! inbox is always open for talks and request though im warning you it’ll take some time for me to write them. if i haven’t responded to your ask best bet im keeping them for when i actually post the fic ! ^0^

im a certified yapper

so most of these are smut but behold, there's fluff too which i mark with a ‘✰’ and angst, marked with ‘✭’

farleigh start (saltburn 2023);

—"me or you"

summary: when farleigh decided that your rivalry isn’t fun enough for him, he proposes a deal

—"like earth orbiting the sun" ✰

summary: farleigh start! who makes his girlfriend his entire personality.

—"abstinence"

summary: farleigh refuses to admit that he’s physically unable to keep his hands off you, so the both of you place a bet against each other, leading to a week of abstinence

—"spell"

summary: farleigh had trouble resisting you since the first time he saw you so he laid his trap to which you walk right in

—"i wish i knew you wanted me" ✭

summary: a very short thought while i work on the others

—“till death do us apart” ✭

summary: sometimes even fate can be altered

—“casual

summary: there’s a reason why you should never talk about farleigh behind his back

jann mardenborough (gran turismo 2023);

—"being jann's wag" ✰

summary: what its like being at jann’s races

—"untitled"

summary: “hes just a loser when he’s not winning races”

—"let it grow"

summary: nothing left to do when jann finally gets a new haircut except going absolutely feral

—"domestic sub! jann" ✰

summary: he’s a subby man, even casually. here’s some domestic headcannons of my little whiskers meow meow jann mardenborough

—"mile high club"

summary: classic ol’ airplane fucking because jann gets flustered easily

—“reminisce” ✭

summary: angst, what if the crash had an alternate ending ?

kai (voyagers 2021);

—kai x reader headcannons ✰

summary: sfw, fluff. kinda sad tbh

—"influence"

summary: kai is a dumbass who is easily influenced by zac who’s NOT a good person

kofun (see 2019);

—"combat"

summary: trying to walk on such predatory post apocalyptic world with different abilities than others reaps the enjoyment in living, so you try to make the best out of it

random short thoughts;

— jann with buttplugs

— foursome with farleigh, jann and kai

— pervert! kai panties sniffing

—sub!farleigh being a goodboy

—pervert!jann jerking off to your voice

[firemenenthusiast]

holy shit imagine teaching kofun how to eat a pussy GOD HE'D BE SO GOOD AT IT

GUESS WHAT

—“combat”

inexperienced! kofun x fem!reader

summary: trying to walk on such predatory post apocalyptic world with different abilities than others reaps the enjoyment in living, so you try to make the best out of it

warnings: 18+, smut haha 😔, unprotected p in v (please wrap it), cunnilingus, creampie, overstimulation, inexperienced!kofun, cringiness, reference to early episodes

a/n: guys i let delusions take over the best of me so this is extra delusional. i tried to make the plot as accurate as i could also thank you anon for the request !

between being born into and growing up in a family of warriors, your childhood was nothing short of epic. as early as you’ve gotten the ability to walk on this earth your parents made sure to let you explore as much as there is to explore, handing you miniature models of weapons before you could even form coherent sentences so that you’ll be able to fit into the bloodline. you picked your first weapon at 2, though non-fighters of the village thought it was too early, and far too dangerous.

it’s a family tradition, and it’s so that you’ll be able to grow into it. your family believes that weapons and fighters are one, and you’ve grown to embrace the world you grew up in, making sure you live up to the cavernous expectations, no matter how different you actually are apart from everyone. no one knows, except your parents. you’ve been living with a mouth half shut, a heart less full because of the secret that you’ve kept all your lives.

it wasn’t until the twins were born, not long after you were that your parents find out that you’re not the only one. they weren’t sure of how it was possible, no one in your family were given the gift of sight either. but they believe your near relatives somewhere, are also able to see. the twins and you didn’t quite understand that the three of you carry a powerful ability when you were little, it was just the way you were born. sometimes you feel like it’s a curse, with how you have to live a life half a lie, and how you have to be hidden like you’ve killed a bunch and kept the blade.

it’s still fresh in your memory, the moment baba voss came joining you on your daily training in the woods, bringing together haniwa and kofun. you were 5, and so were they. you’re older just by a couple months. it amazed you just how clever they are, and how haniwa is basically another copy of you, with how invested she is in the art of combat. kofun on the other hand, he was quiet. every time baba would bring them along he’d refuse to follow and learn. instead, you’d catch him staring at you before he’d immediately chase away his gaze. one wouldn’t exactly say kofun is shy but he’s definitely quiet most of the times, in contrary to his sister.

the three of you had grown up together, but you evidently spend more time with haniwa, given your shared interests. she’s observant, and incredibly brave, she’s grown to be an amazing fighter, sometimes even surpassing you who grew up with fighters. you learn a lot from her, especially about the real world. you learn a lot from kofun too, particularly on how to read people, especially him who acts less significant than anyone you’ve ever met. sometimes he makes you wonder if he dislikes your presence with how timid he is around you compared to everyone else. he’d voice out his stand and disagree with haniwa any time but will fall quiet the moment you side with her.

part of the village might have found out about the twins’ ability by now but your parents had asked baba voss and paris to refrain from mentioning you. they respect their requests, so it’s just a few of you who knows, less people to worry about snitching when the witch hunter comes for a scavenge. it’s become worse now that the twins are all grown up, and the elderly couldn’t do much anymore in making sure they’re not exposed to threat.

especially with haniwa’s curiosity and kofun’s, well. kofun’s empathy to go help out literally anyone without thinking about his own safety. when the family came back from their trip you’ve heard from your parents about what had happened to kofun, and how his life flashed before his eyes. though the image stroke fear inside you, it was intriguing, and you wanted to listen about it from himself.

“so how did you escape ?” you’d asked him, his eyes were set on the pebbles scattering the ground, something inside him tells that he should be embarrassed with how he ended up being saved by baba voss. he wished he would have fought them on his own, so that he has something to use to impress you when he got back. he’s been on a pursuit of something great ever since he first saw you, something he could be proud of, something he could impress you with, something that he could do together with you but he’d realised long ago that you’re more similar to his sister than him.

his fingers traced along the assortment of tiny rocks from the riverside, picking one up before throwing it into the flowing water. “baba showed up” he quietly answered, his eyes tried to follow the movement of the pebble though it’s disappeared long ago. he looked nothing different than usual, you still find it difficult to tell what he may be feeling.

“that’s a relief ! he’s an incredible warrior” you nudged his left shoulder with your right one, a grin creeping onto your face trying to light up the moment. “wh- no, what ? no it’s not” he snapped, his eyebrows a tight knit while his head turn towards you. his reaction took you a bit by suprise. now you can tell that he’s irritated, yet you can’t figure out why. the sound of the flowing water suffocates the tension between the two of you before you break the momentarily silence, “what do you mean ?”.

shaking his head slightly, he let out a dragged out sigh as the water surface got broken into again by another throw of his hand. “you don’t get it. and so does haniwa it seems” the pebbles on the ground seem to really pique his interests now, with how much he’s doing with them. your eyes follow his movements along the marbled surface, he had some of them balled into his fists, his knuckles white from the hold. “will you do me a favor ?” he continued, still keeping his head down, if not facing towards the stream. you eagerly nodded, though confusion engulfed through rest of you.

“you have to train me” taken aback by his request, you eyes tracked his down as he searched into your eyes. for a few seconds you struggled to react, dancing around the thought on whether he’s being serious. before you knew it your lips are pursed and you’re letting out a chortle.

“so that’s what this is about ?” you asked him within the remainder of your laugh before he frowned, round eyes roam aimlessly across your face, seeking for comfort.

“what ?” a small pout accompanied his frown.

“-because you couldn’t fight for yourself ?” you couldn’t contain your crooked smile before you continue,

“you know, you’re not that bad of a fighter if it wasn’t for your sulky face” you reassured him, if that even counts as reassurance. for the record your intentions were pure.

“sulk- no i’m not ?” he quickly protested, making you laugh harder

“there !” as the realisation hits he turned his head away from you, warmth growing on his cheeks before he planted his feet firm on the ground, threatening to leave you who’s still giggling.

“okay! okay- kofun stop, fine i’ll train you- we’ll train together” you offered, fixing the last bit of your sentence to accommodate his exasperation. he glanced at you from the corner of his eyes before raising his head to look around

“that’s more like it” he responded, though the organ in his chest is pounding hard against the flesh, the heat on his cheeks that never left, now becoming warmer. the cold weather almost froze both your skin off, making the tinge of red across his cheeks visible. you smiled at him, as you reached over to grab his wrist and hold it up against the sky.

since he’d asked you to train him nothing really changed, it’s not like he hasn’t been training at all. just the fact that before, he didn’t take training seriously, he used to take one wrongful step and decided that he’s done for the day. if you didn’t know any better he just looks like he’s easily given up, and that he didn’t care. in fact, he does care, but now even more so than before with the change of his training partner. you hear the heavy axe slice through thin air landing at the wooden target. “nice, kofun !” you yelp from behind him, excited to see his first bullseye. it’s just the two of you today, haniwa said she was joining the two of you yesterday but found out that baba was gonna go into the woods. you’d told her to listen and not follow behind but you know how she is, jumping at any chance for an adventure.

kofun looks as if he’s maintaining his stance, pulling out an arrow from the leather quiver strapped across his broad back before crossing it with his bow. he’s attempting to match the bullseye he just landed with his arrow this time. with one swift draw of the string, the arrow lands right beside the spiked axe. “it worked !” he exclaims, before turning around to find your reaction to what he just did. “i told you” you respond, referring to the knowledge you shared with him, which was telling him to lock his thumb over his curled fingers when aiming.

you’ve always done it like that, so you showed him how when he quipped about your precise shots. now that he’s getting better at this stuff, he’s becoming more eager to try the things he never bothered about. you picked out the foreign lint sticking on your fur collar before fixing your quiver strap. “what do you wanna do now?” you ask, your hands resting on your waist as you watch him walk over you standing on the flat surface at the side, leaping over some forest bushes.

he looks at you, one hand keeping his bow steady against himself, “one on one” he suggests, his face dripping with amusement and what looks like adrenaline filled excitement to you. beaming, your eyebrows raise slightly as you watch him carefully adjust his stance, hands hooked on the holster decorating his body armour. his legs are planted precisely on the dewy forest ground, ready to take you on. mirroring his actions, you get into your position before falling still as your eyes gleam onto his. he gives you a look of approval before you strike your first move, landing before his shoulder. as you try to read his movements your hand dip towards your holster to pull out the trenchant dagger by its wrapped handle.

“oh we’re using weapons ?” he sneers, eyes sharp as his hand roam over his waist to pull out his own. “don’t worry kofun i’m not gonna poke you” you joke at him, making fun of the fact that he believes that you might thrust the sharp end into his flesh. “i’m not worried” he responds before striking his next move, landing a contact of his flattened palm firm on your side. he got you with that move, as you failed to predict it. he offers you a smirk, fail to mask his obvious pride of landing a contact after sessions of trying to do so. you waste no time taking the opportunity to attack his exposed chest, much to his dismay. his face scrunches up from the slight pain of the strike as his body’s forced backwards a few steps.

shaking his head, he immediately return the attack with his blade bearing hand, swiftly swinging it low. the swing strikes your thigh, slicing open the fibres of your pants with the sharp end dipping just slightly beneath your skin. you let out a yelp out of shock, wincing at the sudden sting on your thigh, you immediately crouch down to press on it, incase the cut is deep. you raise a palm towards kofun who’s taken aback by what just happened, his eyes shoots open as they refuse to register that he just hurt you. “fuck, are you okay ?” he panics, seeing as you’re still pressing down, the pain still circulating the cut for you to remove your hand.

he crouches down before you, his fingers carefully hover over your slightly trembling ones. small droplets of tears start appearing at the corner of your eyes before his large hand cup your smaller ones, soothing the shock you just had. his eyes sharply set on the cut as you begin to remove your fingers, revealing traces of smeared red. the dagger that sliced through your skin has been shoved away by him long ago, too cautious to keep it near you for now.

he reaches into the small pouch at the backside of his belt to pull out a roll of fabric that looks like gauze before wasting no time to spread it over the small cut and wrapping it around your thigh. “you’re okay- you’re gonna be fine” he quickly reassures when he notices your trembling fingers. swallowing the heavy lump in your throat you catch yourself slowly nodding at him, as you purse your lips. your eyes carefully trail along his working fingers, slender and calloused, he looks like he knows what he’s doing.

as he tilt his head up to look at you his eyes are met with your already gleaming ones, trying to blink the moisture away. seeing the eyes he steals glances from daily, the orbs he longs for staring into his deep brown ones sends shiver down his spine. the familiar tinge of red decorating his cheeks. “haniwa always come home with scratches all over her” he explains, trying to distract you from the vanishing pain and his pounding chest.

you nod at him, the mental image of him tending to haniwa’s wounds plays into your mind. the love that the twin has for each other is truly unmatched. his fingers soothe over the wrapped gauze on your thigh before getting up and settling himself. he helps you get up from your position though the pain has started to fade away, and you’re just as good as new. you follow his steps towards the miniature hut both your parents had built for the purpose of storing training equipments and as a shelter. as he settles you down a heavy sigh escapes his lips. the sound jerks your head towards him, who’s pulling a sturdy covered basket before he sits facing you.

“i’m sorry-“ he begins, his head droops low as the obvious dejected aura seeps out of him. “i don’t know what happened it was all so fast-“ before he could spew out more ramblings you stop him, “you don’t have to be sorry kofun, it’s part of the practice. plus i get injured all the time” you assure him, a soft smile peeking from the corner of your lips. he looks at you with beady eyes before shaking his head again.

“yea, but i don’t wanna be the one to hurt you” he lets out softly, almost under his breath yet you’re still able to catch it. your eyes glint at his words, no words are coming out of your mouth, as if you’re tongue tied. “it’s fine, look- it doesn’t even hurt anymore” you chirp out, showing off to him that you’re able to bounce your leg, and that the cut didn’t do anything to actually stop you from being able to move. seeing your smiley face and gleaming eyes staring at him he couldn’t help the chuckle escaping his lips, that soon turns into small laughter.

“guess i just wanted to impress you so much” he starts amongst his laughs before turning his head to stare across the hut. “you don’t have to” your response is playing games with his mind, maybe it’s the training wearing him out but it’s definitely making him lightheaded

“you’re enough as you are kofun” the fingers that were playing on your lap reach over for his large ones, delicately hooking the indexes. he swears he could hear the sound of his heart pounding in his chest, a faint fear creeping into his head that you might hear it too.

struggling to keep his eyes on yours, “you’re perfect” he confesses, a heavy sigh falls from his lips. though the sudden confession is quite odd to you, you’re eager to know the reason he might think so

“what makes you think that ?” you ask

“well,” he starts, letting out a heavy breath

the sudden movement of his fingers on yours makes you dart your eyes towards them

“-you never complain. all i can see you do after failing is get right back up again” his explanation earns a hum from you, his index finger curling around yours. he struggles to wrap his head around the moment you two are having, having only dreamt about this ever at night.

“why do you want to impress people so much ?” you ask him as your eyes roam across his tilted face.

“not people, you.” his short answer ends with an emphasised ‘you’, pushing your shoulders back consequently.

you’re not sure what’s driving your thoughts in returning a response but you feel as if this is the only thing you wanna do at the moment. dipping your head near his face, you cup his jaw with your free hand to tilt it upwards, your eyes inches away from his before closing in the distance between your lips. you feel his tongue poking out past his lips against yours as you feel him lick his upper lips. his tiny action making you curl the corners of your mouth in amusement, a deep sigh falling out of you. your lips dance softly against him, who’s trying his best to return the kiss without making it awkward.

everything’s still too new for him, yet he’s willing to take the chance with you. he’s wanted to for years and the moment finally came. his fingers that were gently hooking your smaller ones grasp slightly harder, before you know it your fingers are intertwined with his, sharing the lingering warmth. the kiss started out slow and pure, as he’s still scared that he might do something to scare you away. he’s pouring all the pent up feeling he’s had for you for the last couple of years into the warm embrace of his lips against yours, allowing the both of you to mould into each other.

you’ve never thought about how soft his lips actually are, but he definitely has about yours. the fingers that were curling into his large ones reach up to the side of his face, your fingertips grazing along his cheeks. you could hear small whimpers escaping his lips as he struggles to breathe with your lips pushing against his. a gentle swipe of your tongue across his plump lips makes him hesitate, as his lips stop chasing yours for a moment. you glance across his face to catch the sight of his long lashes, blinking away at you. hot breath fan against your swollen lips before he connects the both of you in another longing kiss.

as he feels your hands tug at his body armour he hesitantly untie them, before taking it off, temporarily breaking off the kiss. your hands resumes the tugging on his collar this time, as the kiss starts to get heavier and deeper. a quiet moan escapes your lips before his lips trail away from yours, kissing at your jawline, and working its way towards your earlobe. he’s not entirely sure if he’s doing it right but all he wants is to kiss you all over.

starting from your jawline, he continues to kiss the side of your neck, delicately grazing his teeth across the skin and smoothing his tongue over it. his eager lips are nearing your sternum as he makes sure to leave tight trail of kisses, careful to not leave any unkissed spot. he halts the movements of his lips for a moment to catch his breath before leaning forward to kiss your lips again, drinking in your essence.

his hands were roaming across every inch of your body he could reach, kissing you like his life depended on it. you start to untie the training garment wrapped around your body, wasting no time to take off the fabrics and leather that are strapped on you before the session. you’re both now left with your woven shirts on, acting as the base for all the training belts and armours now discarded away. eagerness taking over your conscience as you tug the hem of your shirt over your head, exposing your upper body to him, who’s very much has been struck with a spell upon the view before him. his eyes try to look at everywhere but your exposed breasts, earning a soft chuckle from you.

“you can look, kofun”

his eyes set on yours, struggling to maintain eye contact before you grab his large calloused hands, lifting them from the side of your knees to gently place them on your chest. you can see his adam’s apple visibly bob in his throat as his fingers start to slowly knead and pinch on the sensitive nubs experimentally. his cold hands send shivers down your spine as a gasp escape past your lips from his touch. nothing could prepare him for the sudden confidence washing over him as he bends down to latch his mouth onto one of your tits, his tongue licking the flesh and flicking over the sensitive nub, earning an audible gasp from you. “s’pretty” he murmurs against your skin, as your fingers run across his braided locs. he takes that as a good sign before resuming to suck on your other tit and kissing along the lines of your mound, making you moan as he kisses your under boob.

you try to grab his hands to hold onto them before he snakes them himself and tangle your fingers in between his. he lets his hands go to graze his fingers across the skin of your back and trail along your spine with ghostly touch starting from the bottom to the top. his large hands roam lower at your back, settling them on your waist, just above your butt. his trailing kisses now moving towards your navel, nose nuzzling closely into the flesh of your stomach, eyebrows knitted like he’s concentrating.

stopping just above the drawstrings of your pants, he tilts his chin towards your face, his eyes gleaming with pure adoration. “am i doing it right ?” he asks you innocently, your hands now playing with the tight braids in his hair. “do you wanna go further ?” you respond to him with another question as he nods immediately. “i’ll talk you through” you hear him let out a faint ‘okay’ before you undo the tie on your pants and shimmy out of them with the help of his fingers.

he’s now kneeling before you, his fingers slowly smooth along the skin of your thigh, tracing the gauze he’d wrapped around you earlier. nuzzling his face against your thigh, his eyes hadn’t quite set upon your gleaming core. taking in your scent, he opens his eyes as his body tells him to kiss at your exposed folds. looking at him, he looks like he’s just served with the meal of his life, his eyes drip with anticipation. “you’re so pretty” he lets out as he moves his face further before his lips are met with the soft sensitive flesh of your folds, making him kiss all over them.

the nudge of his nose against your sensitive bud makes you let out a sharp moan, jerking his head away from your core. “what’s wrong ?” he asks worriedly, to which you shake your head and scratch at the hair on his temple. he continues his peppering kisses along your folds before he starts kitten licking at where he just kissed. the sensation leaves your lips falling apart, the soft moans from them increasing in volume.

“so good, kofun” your words guide him on what feels good, so he tries to suck on your dripping folds next, earning another moan of pleasure from you. he takes a mental note on the things that emit good response from you before combining them all in a much increased pace. his assault on your pussy makes your hips buck against his face, to which he pushes your back so your pussy’s planted further into his face.

“mm- that’s good kofun, oh” you let him know

“yeah ?” he asks innocently, to make sure he’s on the right track but his little action turns you on like hell

“is this okay ?” pulling his mouth away from your pussy, he asks to confirm but the loss of pressure against your wet cunt making you whine. you nod your head vigorously as your hand pushes the back of his head back to your aching core.

he resumes his sucking on your clit, the sensitive spot making your hips buck into his face, involuntarily earning a low groan from him. the vibration from his groan feels electric against your pussy before his mouth start to slowly travel towards your clenching hole. he gives the rim experimental licks which receive a whine from you. “more, please- kofun” your pleas sound heavenly in his ears especially how his name flows out of your lips, sending blood rushing to his hardening length. your sounds stimulates him to try sucking on your hole this time, slurping up the wetness oozing out of it. the tip of his nose is now grazing along your wet folds, the pleasure making you arch your back into him.

“need more, please-” you beg. he’s determined to please you, his hands pushing hard against your lower back so your pussy is slotted up his face. “need your tongue inside” with your final guide, he pokes his tongue into your hole, flicking the tip around the walls, earning loud moans and hard tugs on his hair from you. now that he knows the spots most pleasurable for you, he does it all over again with the indication from your whines and moans.

just as he start to suck from your hole up towards your clit, he feels your hips bucking for the last time before high pitched moans spill from your lips. your pretty sounds alone are enough to make him cum right there and then. your hands frantically push his head away as he continued his licks after your orgasm, not knowing that you might be too sensitive. he just thought that it felt good.

he immediately raises his head to look at you, his mouth and nose are covered in your wetness, glinting in your essence. “why- did i do something wrong ?” he asks, to which you cup your hands on his cheeks while shaking your head. “m’ sensitive” you respond, making him fall quiet as his eyes take in all your pretty fucked out features from the orgasm. he gently smoothes his fingers along your thighs as he waits for you to settle down, eager to go again. “you’re so so pretty” he admits to your face, making your cheeks heat up and your insides tingly. he’s adorable, you think. his words almost make your stomach flip inside out, you’re in peace with the sudden overwhelming feeling you have for him.

“can i go again ?” as you seem to have picked yourself up he asks politely, large hands settling on your ass from the spot you’re sitting. you’re taken aback by his question, thinking that you’ve definitely worn him out from the previous orgasm yet you find yourself nodding your head, giving him the green light. with his nose and mouth still covered in your cum from before he dives back into your folds, repeating a similar pattern as before from what he’d learned. it’s not long until the second wave crashes down and you’re cumming again on his face. strike two.

as much as he wants to eat out your pussy forever the strain in his woven pants is starting to hurt, and he can feel his tip getting more and more sensitive by the second. fear stalks his entire being that he might cum in his pants. you notice him twitching around in his position before you look down to see the huge bulge that has formed in his thin pants. he’s kissing up your thigh at the moment, still wanting to go at your pussy again but you want him to feel good too. you begin to move against his kisses to get up from your position and pulling him from the ground. his knees are getting sore from the kneeling yet he doesn’t even realise.

“why ?” he asks

“wanna make you feel good too”

“you were making me feel good” he responds, it’s true, he was having the time of his life in between your thighs. if only he knew what’s in for him

switching your places with him, he’s now seated at the spot you were in earlier, confusion visible in his face yet he’s waiting for your next move patiently. the bulging tent in his pants is accompanied with a wet spot at where the tip’s supposed to be, as you can see it jumping slightly. heat creeps onto his face from you seeing him like this before he purses his lips. pulling at the drawstrings slowly, his eyes follow your every movements closely, occasionally wincing when the friction rubs against the sensitive tip. his hands rest obediently on his sides, not knowing what to do with them as you carefully pull his pants down, pooling at his ankle. “you okay ?” you ask him to make sure, to which he nods his head

his hardened length bounces against his navel when it’s released, his raging red tip glistening with precum. the sudden cold air hitting his hard on making him wince and throw his head back. he lets out a breath but it comes out shuddered, his thigh sit stiffly trying not to move the heavy length of his cock. you eye his shaft from the base, his balls heavy and full, his length girthy with a prominent vein travelling along the base to the top. at the end is his sensitive tip, raging with the prettiest shade of pink and a bead of precum threatening to spill. he lets out a small whimper as he patiently waits for you to do something, his fingers itching to wrap around his length but something tells him not to. “please do something please” his turn to spread his pleas around, his chest heaves with shuddering breaths.

you place your thumb and index finger on his tip, feeling the sticky substance oozing out of it, the contact making him moan. the skin on his length looks as if it’s gonna hurt if you just touch it so you follow your instincts to let a glob of spit fall onto your hand, before immediately spreading it along the hard shaft. kofun’s trying his very best to conceal his loud moans from the pleasure and from the fact that your fingers are wrapped around his cock. his face contorts in pleasure, his eyebrows a tight knit with his mouth agape. the attempts at concealing his moans making them turn into whimpers instead, something you’re not complaining about.

you give him an experimental pump down his shaft, earning a twitch of his thigh. seeing as the one pump is good, you start to jerk him off, your arms settled on his lap. hearing him wince, “s’cold” he lets out slowly. your first thought and reaction to his complain is to sink your face down his cock, keeping the shaft warm with your mouth. he couldn’t see your actions coming, making his thigh jump and his hips buck into your mouth. “sorry” he immediately apologises before you take your mouth off his cock and get up. you mentally agree that you’re ready to take him before settling your legs in between his, you hover your pussy over his hard cock before sinking on it. the tight wet warmth of your walls around his length earning loud moans from the both of you, the pleasure unmatched with anything you’ve done before.

“fuck” you hear him mutter under his breath, he’s struggling to maintain his composure. his hands are now settled on your waist, you’re fully sitting on him now, your legs bent and feet settled on his thighs. the both of you bask in the silence and pleasure for a moment, trying to adjust with the all new feeling. “should i move ?” you begins, as he slowly nods, his palm guiding you on his cock. his length a perfect fit in your pussy, with his tip protruding against your sensitive spots every now and then. the stretch is definitely something new to you, but the pleasure takes over any other sense. his cock moves snuggly in and out of your hole, stretching your walls at every second possible. his heavy balls slap against your ass, the sound of skin slapping erupting through the depth of the forest.

as you bounce on his hard cock you pray for everyone to be too busy with their own stuff to realise that you and kofun has been gone for longer than you should. his gleaming eyes are set on yours, admiring your pretty orbs like he always does in secret. mouth agape, he looks as fucked out as he’s ever been, letting his cock thrust in and out of your cunt. his cheeks look flushed, his lips swollen from kissing and from eating you out. reaching down, you rest your forehead against his before connecting your lips once again, as he shuts his eyes in contentment. your lips move as if they’ve missed each other, moulding against the curves of each of your lips.

pullng away from the kiss, you rest your temple against his, skin moist from all the steam and sweat. wrapping your arms around his neck, you try to steady your bounces on his lap as he rests his chin on your shoulder, his mouth agape trying to catch his breath. his fingers roam against the skin of your ass, before grabbing at them and slamming them down against his cock, making both you and him moan. you hear him groan lowly into your ears, before his thighs start twitching and his hands on your ass no longer slamming on a regular pace. the pleasure starts to cloud his mind as he shuts his eyes, staggering groans escaping his lips. before you know it his cum starts shooting and painting your clenching walls, warm spurts of white threatening to seep out from the side of his cock out of your pussy.

you’ve stopped bouncing, and now both of you are catching your breaths, limbs tangled against each other. you offer him a droopy smile, to which he pulls you in for a deepened kiss, swiping his tongue across the swollen flesh. “are you okay ?” is his first question after pulling away, his fingers moving the strands of hair sticking onto your face to the side. you return him a look, seeing his flushed cheeks and beads of sweat decorating his temple. nodding your head to reassure him, “im okay, are you ?” he nods as a response, “mh-mm” he confirms.

“i think this is more workout than the training we did today” you start, a chuckle escapes your lips. he offers you a meek smile before also chuckling to himself. he stares at the door of the hut, before his eyes turn to search into yours.

“thank you for believing in me” he chirps out, his voice quiet, almost like a whisper

you both sit in silence for a moment catching your breaths, and taking in the realisation of what just happened. you feel his fingers around your waist fiddling around, fingertips softly grazing against the skin. as you feel settled, his hands roam around your waist before wrapping his fingers around it. your hands settle on his shoulder as he hoists you up, guiding your hips before settling you down beside him. small drops of cum trickling down your thighs from the friction. the loss of contact and warmth makes him wince before letting out a low groan. now that you’re seated beside each other, skin sticky from all the sweat, he leans down to reach the the hem of his pants to pull it up his legs. he reaches over for your pants that’s laying on his side before helping you get them on. you tie the drawstrings carefully before taking your shirt from his hand.

“why me ?” you start, breaking off the silence

“huh ?” he quips, fingers busy adjusting the strings on his collar

“do you like me kofun ?” you ask him, he knows well that you don’t mean as friends.

he turns his resting head towards you, his fingers fiddling with the hem of his shirt.

“i do” he answers shortly. the quick response from him is enough for you, so you nod in return.

he sucks in a deep breath before starting to talk

“—whenever you’d come by our tent to get haniwa i catch myself staring at you. i should be ashamed,” stopping halfway through, he continues-

“—im glad you haven’t realised that i’m always somewhere at the corner when you train with her, watching you while struggling to keep my heart from pounding out of my chest-” your ears perk up, tilting your head down to look at your fingers

“—cause that would’ve been embarrassing”

“it’s embarrassing how often i try to figure out ways to get closer to you-”

“—so is the fact that no matter how many times i try to convince myself that the feelings are just my mind playing games with me, i catch myself thinking about you instead”

“i know it sounds crazy but everything seems to move slower when i look at you-”

“—and when it’s your turn to look at me i pray that i look the best i could” just as his words start to trail off, his head tilts down. his heart is still pounding like it always does when he’s near you, but he pushes through the feeling.

your silence is agonising, anticipation slowly piercing into him. reaching your hand out towards his lap, you gently spread your fingers into his large palm, warmth radiating into yours. “you’re dramatic” you comment, turning your head to face him. the comment makes him let out a chuckle, heat splaying across his cheeks from embarrassment. you take a deep breath beside him, your shoulders raising before you continue, “i like you” your beady eyes gleam onto his temple, as he turn his head to meet yours with his glossy ones.

as the both of you sit there chuckling to yourselves you find yourself resting your temple on his shoulder. letting out a sigh, you glance outside, noticing that the sun’s starting to set and the sky’s dimming.

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