#failed execution
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It's funny how often Bill is described as a master manipulator, he's so smart that he knows what everyone is thinking and how to push their buttons.
Because he is SO BAD at manipulation!
The only reason he ever gets what he wants is because he can literally read and control minds. And historically, he is pretty shit at using what he learns in a productive way.
Every time he has a human partner, it's because they are obviously desperate for something he can provide. All he does is use the fact that he's a seemingly omniscient otherworldly being to gain ethos, and then tell them he can get them the thing they want.
These are not complicated concepts. Anyone with those inherent advantages could do that. And, historically, when the actual negotiations are up to him and he hasn't backed someone into a corner, he pretty immediately fumbles the bag.
Think of when he possessed that priest: he pitched his plans outright with zero tact and everyone in the room immediately refused and dedicated themselves to making sure he never got his way.
The pharoh DISPISED him, found him annoying and tried to banish him. The shaman caught wise pretty quick. Xgqrthx never even planned on helping him at any point. Every plan failed because of Bills own ineptitude, when all the cards were stacked in his favor!
The way he talked to Ford was disturbing and direct and entirely Bill-like. Ford was just a sponge for any flattery and happened to be into the way Bill spoke and left him rats and suggested murder because he is also abnormal.
Bill is bad at making friends, which is why he has just a few henchmaniacs he's gathered over billions of years.
People DO NOT LIKE HIM.
And he's in denial about that to an extent. He always thinks they'll be on his side once he reveals his true intentions. He always thinks they'll go for the promise of infinite power and destruction because who wouldn't?
Basically, for an immortal god who's had an unfathomably long time to practice social skills and can LITERALLY ENTER MINDS TO KNOW EXACTLY WHAT TO SAY... he's really, really bad at manipulation. And really, any sort of person to person connection.
#my cringefail socially oblivious and overall kinda stupid king <3 i love you#bill cipher#the book of bill#book of bill#gravity falls#there are so many other examples too#basically you can look at any instance of him trying and failing to execute a plan#like babygirl it should not have taken as long as it did#bullying him
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on the one hand, it is convenient that there are several pizza places within two miles of my house.
on the other hand, that makes it completely unjustifiable to spend money on delivery when they're already so close, so if i want pizza I have to leave the house to go fetch it. truly there can be no joy without suffering
#this means i almost never get pizza#i am tantalus#doomed to see the cheezy bread forever out of my reach#tomorrow my dad and I are off on a quest to get me Free Bandsaw#because hey! free bandsaw#but that means i have to clean garage to make a place for Free Bandsaw#and i am trying (and failing) to motivate myself to do this#if the garage must be cleaned...perhaps the price of free bandsaw is too great...#hmm. it is occurring to me. that perhaps the executives are dysfunctioning#maybe i need to ingest a prodigious quantity of caffeine
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Vhnemdkjf purble irep! Can we see more fairy irep and anti-fairy peri?
Yup!! During their schooling, where the most amount of swaps happened, the two would end up swapping in more than just color palettes!
Sometimes Peri would get caught scheming and plotting Irep's demise (Revenge for Ruining his Science Project). Or Irep will get caught doing something very nice and wholesome for another Fairy (Helping a new student find their way around school).
Just as Anti Cosmo and Cosmo has a bit of each other's personalities mixed up, Peri and Irep has a bit of an overlap in behaviors, haha. They both love to monologue, for example. The more swaps a pair does, the more mixed they get!
Bitties Series: [Start] > [Previous] > [Next]
#fairly oddparents#fop#fop a new wish#fop peri#peri#fop irep#irep#asks#itty bitties fop au#haha peri scheming is such a funny concept#since irep is terrible at succeeding you'd think this means peri is GREAT at executing plans right?#WRONG#they're both HORRIBLE at it#but while Irep usually fails due to his own oversights and intervention. Peri fails because.. he underestimates Irep's stupidity.#but also they're a bit different in their ways of plotting#irep monologues like a villain giving a triumphant speech#peri monologues like he's trying to sell you something#which. is fine and all! but trying to sell someone their own DOOM is... hrm. it irritates irep a lot.#also. i should. probably make note of this. though we'll get around to it eventually#there ARE consequences to swapping too much or too long.
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So what if Vi’s death causes the happier timeline? She’s fine! The precocious doctor’s daughter out in the hallway had been desperate to show off her CPR skills. Nobody’s ever gonna let Jayce live that down, though.
Previously in the AU
#before you come at me for medical inaccuracies I’ve made the executive decision that a hex crystal explosion has a similar effect to#an electric shock which means that CPR would be effective#but i like to think their mutual stubbornness was actually what brought Vi back#also i spared Jayce in this au in the spirit of pacific rim day and also i kind of like him and Vi’s fail teamups#arcane league of legends#arcane#caitvi#vi arcane#Caitlyn kiramman#Jayce tali’s#my art#arcane art
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it is really exhausting how much people are really digging their heels in on that you cannot criticize or critique the narrative choices or direction or structure of CritRole C3 on the basis that it is not strictly scripted. like, yes, there is an element of improv, a strong element even, but this isn't completely free-form improv. there's a degree of structure and intentionality. it being somewhat improv or unscripted doesn't mean that it does not or cannot have structure, intent, direction, purpose, control over the narrative choices.
stating "well, it doesn't cohere as strongly because it's unscripted" doesn't hold when there's dozens and dozens of strong ttrpg campaigns that are also unscripted and improv. ExU Calamity, Candela, TAZ, Dimension 20, DesiQuest, NADDPOD, Into the Motherlands, Rivals of Waterdeep, LA by Night, Transplanar, on and on — these are all improv and unscripted with really strong storytelling and structure. "it's unscripted" does not mean anything because other campaigns manage! this campaign is capable of cohering despite being unscripted because plenty of other campaigns have.
like, on top of that, if you cannot criticize its direction on the basis of being unscripted and thus lacking in motivated intent, it suggests that you cannot praise it for messaging, themeing, narrative, or anything that would suggest needing motivated intent. if it cannot fail on the basis that it's unscripted and improv, then it cannot succeed either because such argument suggests that unscripted improv robs it of having control of its direction. for any failure to be without merit because it is not by full choice and is just out of their control, then any success is similarly accidental and without merit.
frankly, if I were trying to defend the direction of the campaign, I simply would not be doing so by functionally invoking Monkeys With Typewriters
#this could be worded better but i'm bleh and my brain isn't working. Like Moonward coheres and it's fuller improv.#I am not a particularly skilled actual play performer but I am in fact one so I know intimately how bullshit this argument is#“oh but it's improv and unscripted” you can still tell a damn coherent story and execute a character with structure and intent#and you can still very much FAIL to do these things inside unscripted work#Critical Role things
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HI I love your profile pic hsdhfjhg... big hand... liddle face... very good and cute. brings a smile to me in these trying times ;w;
(picture for future reference on this post)
hi freak i missed you!! 👋🎊
the trying times are sure A Trial. this is why i have commited to the duty of becoming the gaster girl from tumblr who only ever draws and writes for this one character
#inbox#freakbullet#artwork#wingdings and me#at this point should i expect a message from you with every icon update#bc honestly i love this dynamic#we sure are lucky my executive dysfunction urges me to procrastinate productively#fails classes and runs to the equivalent of crying on my husbands shoulder ig#i am only persisting bc he wouldnt let me give up. he knows us sentimental losers cannot deal with the sad piano reprise#wdym DARKNESS FALLS.mp3#low blow
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Day 18: take your time
#my art#badsansuary#utmv#sans au#killer sans#canon x self insert#sans x self insert#killer x self insert#self insert#this probably won't be my favourite#but whatever we gotta fail to succeed#or something#i have ideas for the other prompts but not the time to execute them
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Last minute escape from Execution
@whumpers-monthly
Fandom: The Witcher Netflix
Whumpee: Cahir
Published: 2022-10-19 Completed: 2022-12-14
Words: 26,422 Chapters: 17/17
Chapter 17 of "Not Cruel by Nature"

Soon it will be over. With a bang. No, more of a thud. Cahir knows what it sounds like when the executioner's axe hits the bones in the condemned man's - or woman's - neck, cuts right through them and then strikes the beheading block still with enough force to create the thudding sound. If the executioner does his job like he should. If not, things can get pretty messy. No, wrong word, there is nothing pretty about a messed-up execution. Cahir has witnessed quite a few beheadings back in Nilfgaard, one or two of which were exceptionally gruesome. The headsman must have been drunk to miss so badly, to need more than three attempts to finish the job. Not that an execution is pretty in any way even if the executioner knows what he is doing, with all the blood spurting from the severed carotid artery and the grisly, chopped-off head left to rot on a spike by the city gate. For a moment Cahir wonders what they will do with his head after the execution. Display it at the entrance to Aretuza? No, probably not, a bit too terrifying for a school for young girls. Maybe they will gift-wrap it for one of the northern kings or queens for their private collection of shrunken heads and skulls? Some people even use the skulls of their dead enemies as candle holders or paper weights, he knows this for a fact. Well, as he will be thoroughly dead then, whatever they do with his remains will not concern him anymore. If it was only over already. Instead he has to stand here between the two guards like some exotic exhibition piece. In clear view of the executioner's block. The sight does give him the chills, no matter how much he pretends it does not, the more so the longer this takes. This commemoration ceremony. At the moment, Tissaia de Vries is solemnly proclaiming the names of the killed mages. Her voice sends cold shivers up and down Cahir's spine. When he looks at her, he can almost feel her fingers on his temples, her magic mercilessly drilling into his brain, like some sort of phantom pain. Well, perhaps he ought not complain. Any phantom or otherwise pain will cease to exist shortly. As will he. And was it not his wish that his death would serve some kind of purpose? Now it will. Atonement for Yennefer - Cahir has no idea what the Hero of Sodden would have to atone for, but this is hardly his problem - and, most of all, entertainment for the audience. And what an illustrious audience it is, no reason for complaints here either. Pretty much all the northern kings and queens appear to have assembled in this ancient ruin. A fitting ambience for a memorable execution. At least they are giving him this. In addition to a beautiful, female executioner. Something he has never heard of before. Whether or not it is a good thing, remains to be seen. Cahir looks at Yennefer's slight form. Has she ever held an axe in her hands before? Probably not, why would she? Hopefully, the powerful sorceress will use some magic trick to help her do her grisly task. Otherwise it seems unlikely that she will be able to do it with just one swing of the blade. Which is not exactly a reassuring prospect, no.
Strange, how he can reflect on what will happen in a short while in this detached manner, as if it was not his head on the chopping block but somebody else's, as if this was not happening to him at all. As if it was just a nightmare and he would eventually wake up in his bed in Darn Dyffra, the last couple of months nothing but the lingering aftertaste of a bad dream. However, he knows this is real, he knows this is the end. His end. He knows it will hurt. And begin any minute now.
Suddenly an even more disturbing thought occurs to Cahir. What if they send his head to Nilfgaard? As a demonstration of power? What if his father gets to see it at court? It will be hard enough for his parents to lose another son. He can still remember how devastated his mother was when his much older brother Aillil was killed many years ago fighting the uprising in Nazair, and how ugly she was from weeping. She made him promise to her to hate the Nordlings then, and he hated the Nordlings with a vengeance for making his beautiful mother look so ugly. How old was he? Ten? He has killed plenty of Nordlings since then. Even a Nordling king. And now the Nordlings are killing him. Makes kind of sense. If only his parents are spared the horrific details. Just imagining them seeing his severed head makes Cahir nauseous. He swallows back the rising bile. Maybe it is a good thing he has not had anything to eat today ...
Yennefer of Vengerberg, his executioner, does not appear to enjoy the ceremony much either. She looks pale and nervous as she is standing by the wall opposite him with two other sorceresses. Has she ever seen an execution before? Funny, somehow Cahir does not feel any hate for the black-haired witch although she alone is responsible for the defeat at Sodden Hill. Without her fire, Nilfgaard would have won the battle, he would have won. With a little luck he might even have been able to apprehend the elusive Lion cub of Cintra. While many of the mages assembled here would be dead and eaten by the wolves or crows by now. Including Tissaia de Vries and Vilgefortz of Roggeveen. Aretuza would never have happened to him, nor would this be happening now. He ought to loath this Yennefer from the bottom of his heart. But he does not. Why does he not?

"Today we must unite again against a common enemy."
Vilgefortz, in flowing black and yellow robes. His words disrupt Cahir's train of thought, giving him goose bumps all over. Murmurs of agreement from the audience. The charismatic sorcerer gestures to the guards. It is time. The two long-robed mages start to move, leading the prisoner between them toward the wooden platform in front of the monument. Toward the beheading block. Cahir's chains rattle ominously. They force him onto his knees with a thud. With another thud the two mages make him bend over the block in an awkward position. He must look ridiculous kneeling like this. Well, that is certainly the least of his problems at the moment.

"This Nilfgaardian," Vilgeforts proceeds in a strong, confident voice, "will be put to death."
One of the guards passes the axe to the mage before he turns and faces the audience again, obviously enjoying the dramatic scene and his lead role therein.
"His head will be sent to Cintra to make our voices heard."
He brandishes the axe theatrically while he speaks, adding brief pauses between the words to emphasise every single one of them. Cahir must give it to the man, he is a talented orator. The thought of his head being sent to Cintra, on the other hand, turns his stomach. No. Do not think of it. Breathe. Just breathe. Cintra, not Nilfgaard. His parents won't see it. Everything else does not matter.
"The North, kings and mages alike," Vilgefortz's voice again, dripping with pathos, "this is what strength looks like."
Cheers from the audience. Clapping. Vilgefortz must feel extremely satisfied with himself. His perfect revenge for Sodden Hill. However, why chopping off an unarmed, fettered prisoner's head would show the North's strength, eludes Cahir. Looks like Vilgefortz can sell any bullshit to the kings with his rhetoric.
The applause dies down. The dark-haired mage raises the axe again demonstratively, then walks past Cahir to where Yennefer is standing, alone. He hands the axe over to her. Cahir cannot see the sorceress from his position, but he can feel her eyes on him. Like in the dungeons.

Not long now. He starts to wheeze. To feel faint. He can hear his blood pounding in his ears. Far too fast ...
Yennefer seems to hesitate for a moment. Gasps softly. Then he can feel her come closer, step onto the platform. He cannot hear her through the sudden ringing in his ears, but he can sense her presence, sense her shaky breathing, her fear. Just the length of an axe between them. He turns his head to the side, wants to look his unlikely executioner in the eye for one last time. Catch a glimpse of those incredible purple orbs. Tell her that it is OK.
Holding the axe with both her hands, Yennefer glances down at Cahir and their gazes meet. She clearly does not want to do this. But she has to. He inhales audibly and moves his head back into position. He is ready, as ready as he can be. He cranes his neck downward so that it would be easier for her to see where to hit. Only seconds now before the impact. His breath comes in heavy bursts. What are you waiting for, Yennefer? Do it. Just get it over with. Please.

A movement. She raises the axe. He draws in one last shuddering breath. A whoosh of air as she brings down the blade. His heart skips a beat. However the axe does not strike at his exposed neck. There is no explosion of pain, no gush of blood, no severed head falling to the ground with a wet thump. To Cahir's utter surprise, it instead shatters the chain of his manacles. He gasps in disbelieve. A collective groan runs through the assembled crowd. Then deeply ingrained survival instincts take over. Cahir springs to his feet and runs for his life. The exit is not far. He cannot believe his luck, no guards anywhere. Behind him, he hears the uproar of the audience, the dull sounds of the axe hitting wood, the pyre constructions collapsing, crashing. And the roaring cackle of flames. Yennefer. She is doing a hell of a job. Again. Only this time they are not enemies, are they?

He hears the neighing of a horse just as he rounds a corner. There she is, his executioner turned saviour, mounting a white horse. Panting heavily, Cahir comes to a halt in front of the steed. The horse whinnies, startled. Yennefer reins it in, staring down at him. The horse snorts impatiently.

"Come on, then," she says, having made up her mind. Cahir does not need to be told twice. He jumps onto the mare behind the sorceress, barely believing his good fortune. Why on earth would she help him? It is a total mystery.
"Why save me?" he asks, still out of breath from running.
"Don't flatter yourself. I'm saving me."
Yennefer spurs the horse and off they gallop, the sorceress and the enemy soldier, away from the site of the failed execution and into the night.

If you liked this, read what happened before that and what happened after it on Ao3 or read the entire Sewer Pals series (if you haven't yet). Have fun!
#whumpers monthly#the witcher tv#the witcher netflix#the witcher season 2#cahir#cahir mawr dyffryn aep ceallach#eamon farren#cahir x yennefer#yennefer of vengerberg#anya chalotra#execution#failed execution#the witcher fanfiction#enemies to allies#enemies to friends#enemies to lovers#cahir whump#issue no 21#whumptober#whumpers-monthly
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accessorize your halloween costume
generated with the chatgpt version of dall-e3
#dalle3#chatgpt#halloween#halloween costumes#chatgpt changes all my prompts into much wordier and very specific ones#which dalle3 then hilariously fails to execute#im not sure how you wear the gupoute costume
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Honestly, I think it could be very impactful if Van Helsing did die in the graveyard tonight. It'd continue the trend of people taking any direct stand against Dracula being killed almost casually in return. Up the stakes even more. Maybe he could be found the next morning on a grave with his neck broken, a look of fear or defiance on his face - a reminder of Mr. Swales's death.
Jack would get the note and then find him or hear about him being found in the graveyard. The suitors would arrive thanks to the note the Professor sent them and they'd link up with him. I imagine they would go together anyway, though more expecting to support a Jack who is wondering if it can be real after all or if it was just madness before he was murdered somehow. They would all learn just how true it is together, would have to save each other and then follow the directions left to them. Or possibly seek out the Harkers first and then they might be involved in the Bloofer Lady staking. That would be a good moment of horror too, Mina seeing Lucy like this...
When the groups united they'd have to do research of their own, or go through the documents left behind by Van Helsing. Books of fairy tales and superstitions, pages with scattered notes, comparing them to the diaries...
Thematically, it would fit pretty well with all the other deaths around this part of the book. The parents are all dead and gone. And while Van Helsing is not a parent to anyone here, he was a mentor and guide to Jack in particular. He would join in with the others who now are orphaned/have to figure things out themselves. Jonathan has inherited the responsibilities of a law firm, Arthur has inherited the title and all that goes with it, Jack would inherit Van Helsing's final task.
There would be more collaboration in general (rather than all mostly following) and more leadership emerging from Mina, probably. None of the suitors are going to be as ready to take the lead in this situation, at least not as totally as Van Helsing. Of course, issues with her being left behind probably aren't going to just totally go away. But I imagine less so, or in a different way. Along the way I think there could be more moments for Arthur or Quincey to shine as well, stepping in at different points where originally Van Helsing took the floor.
The end of the story, where everyone splits up three ways, would have to be changed somehow, of course. Either someone has to go alone, or they have to ignore one route entirely. But I think that might be the biggest actual plot change you'd find completely necessary. Other than what happens to Mina, of course. I do think Dracula would still go after Mina somehow, even if she went with them to examine his boxes. But maybe they wouldn't get to the point of doing so as quickly until they collated all their info. Maybe things happen slower, maybe what happened the final night (Jonathan hypnotized into sleep right next to him) would happen more often. Oh, I guess the other change might be no one to hypnotize Mina while spying, unless this is some skill Quincey happens to have or whatever. But then, Jack seems familiar at least with the theory, so maybe he could make an attempt at it.
I mean, there's no reason you would have to stick that closely to the original story. But for the most part I think you could if you wanted, and it would just be a different tone that would still be really powerful. And it would be kind of interesting to have Van Helsing's role be limited to failing to save Lucy throughout. Hiding information right up until he tries to share it, after which he dies. That phrasing makes it sound really brutal, but... I mean it would kind of be brutal, but his legacy would be bringing the two groups together, showing them the truth (or confirming it as the case may be) and entrusting them with the future.
#dracula daily#dracula daily spoilers#van helsing#not saying it would necessarily be better than the canon we have. would depend a lot on the execution#but at the very least it could be a really interesting fic or book jumping off from canon here#dracula failing to come back to lucy here is super characteristic of him and really shows how little he cares#but there's potential if he came. even if just to check in briefly
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In spite of the whole bonkers thing of TP Ganon wielding his own execution sword, I find it fascinating that he is using a weapon of Light to fight you --a weapon originally conceived for purposes of justice, and that light still steeps through him through the wound.
And, to top it all off, Link uses tools more aligned with darkness to fight him back (turning into a wolf, Midna becoming a eldritch horror...)
Symbolically this combo of reverse mirroring AND literal mirroring is very interesting I think
#thoughts#twilight princess#tp#ganondorf#link#midna#thinking...........#meeting in the middle#truly the twilight of all princesses#seriously they were on grade A mythology shit when they made TP#the failed execution of a failed king ascending by force into a failed god..... still refusing failure to define him until the very end#tp ganondorf really always pulling at my heartstrings :_:#in spite of the game not textually committing to these ideas#I'm fairly certain the arbiter's grounds were intentional at least for somebody in the team#even if the idea didn't translate for everyone or had to be mostly washed clean
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getting on a flight…..🙏
#if anything happens……I blame the airline and airplane executives who choose profits over their customers and employees#and politicians like Trump who not only fail to regulate the industry well but actively try to pull back regulations#for capitalistic interests#redirect that anger UPWARD to those in power and those who hoard wealth/resources#love y’all ❤️
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so many thoughts in my head about the intended cruelty of gojo satoru as the protagonist of jjk's secondary plot (specifically the one about love and all of its different forms and the unique ways they manifest) and the utter dichotomy of his character in a shonen manga because there is so much tenderness in him it makes me sad. i know here on tumblr people have reading comprehension so you don't need me to tell you that this man is a walking double-edged sword and is so much more than his strength but have you ever seen a character whose entire person embodies loneliness and has been let down time and time again but is still so determined to love more?
knowing on several occasions that if you don't free the guillotine he will raise his hand against you without a second thought and still not being able to deal the killing blow. being raised your whole life to fear nothing but ending with the fear of loneliness instead of death because you aren't really alive at all, just a symbol of strength. being the strongest and smartest in any room you walk into yet not caring that you're being deceived because that's him, that's my one and only. if it were anybody else they would've been ripped from the fabric of existence itself but not you, never you. you are proud of and shaped by the blood on your hands but you'd throw it all away if you knew it'd end with that of the one you loved staining them, too
#gojo satoru#geto suguru#gojo x geto#jjk#satosugu#sugusato#satosugu brainrot#jjk gojo#highkey gojo is a masterful execution of characterisation#him being killed off the way he was was understandable due to outside influence and author burnout but it never fails to make me sad#10 likes and i write a character study /hj#ill do it either way#gojo satoru my princess
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IDC if David Chiem lives or dies, all I want is IF for whatever reason he gets an execution, he drags Teruko down there with him and makes them both go through it together
#drdt#danganronpa despair time#david chiem#teruko tawaki#please 🙏🙏 please 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏#like imagine. he grabs onto Teruko the moment the clasp seals shut around his neck#and they BOTH GO DOWN. THEY BOTH GO THROUGH DAVID'S EXECUTION#and maybe. and maybe because of Teruko's luck the execution FAILS#PLEASE IMAGINE WITH MEEE IT'S BEEN HAUNTING ME FOR THE PAST YEARRRR#nooty lore#drdt spoilers#danganronpa despair time spoilers
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Just to be clear I firmly stand by the Grisha as a persecuted group that got so much shit for centuries and they deserve every good and kind thing in the world.
Just because they are "privileged" as Bardugo calls them (which means to have special rights and immunity because of your rank) didn't stop the King from sexually assaulting Genya, drüskelle from killing them or being kidnapped and subjected to experiments. They had food on their table and a roof above their head which is what every human being should have but they were never treated as human beings or equals which is what they desired the most.
It's one thing to be "privileged" and another to being fed and the next minute you get either spit on by Ravkans or killed by witchhunters. That's not privilege. That's some superficial alliance that can get them killed any day.
#anti leigh bardugo#“privileged” my ass#we saw the way the Crown ordered for the fake trials and executions to be done after Aleksander failed to accomplish his coup#it's all just a front for the Crown to get what they want from them#if they truly cared then they would pass laws that would protect them#grishaverse#shadow and bone#the grisha
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Comparison of Makoto's inner dialogue towards various objects between chapters 5 and 6, because he just get so angry and weird and neurotic in chapter 6. He just really goes off the walls after his botched execution
or maybe it's the untreated concussion from falling down a garbage pit...
#danganronpa#makoto naegi#dr1#danganronpa thh#shiutpost#my screenshots#it would be wild if a slight behavioral affect due to injury from the failed execution was a factor in him being able to beat junko
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