#ezras love bookstores

[oonajaeadira]

Hi! I feel awkward, but okay. So, I really love your Ezra/Reader fic 'A girl Walks into a bookshop'. and it inspired me to write an ezra/oc fic of my own. it won't be as fluffy and soft as yours, but there will be a lot of similar beats. Ezra opening a bookstore, OC helps run bookstore, OC moves in with Ezra. I just want to know if you're okay with that? It won't be plagiarism by any means, but Idk how you feel about the similarities. It's just that Ezra + Bookstore = Yes.

OH MY GOODNESS TWIN SOUL. I AGREE. EZRA AND BOOKSTORES GO TOGETHER.

Thank you for being so kind and thoughtful and considerate of my feels--I love and appreciate you for it!!!! But friend, I do not own the Ezra + bookshop trope. I am one of many that have done right by it. Proof lies in these amazing works:

All My Love Is Yours by @artemiseamoon (I have a big big big love of this one, y'all....one of my all-time faves MY HEART)

Bookshop by the Coast by @supernaturalgirl20

Celestial Reads by @autumnleaves1991-blog

Verba Amoris by @absurdthirst and @storiesofthefandomlovers

Where the Sky Met the Sea by @awholelottayeehaw

The Green Velvet Chair by @pintsizemama

And there are others that I know I'm missing.

(I know not all of these are Ez as bookshop owner, but any excuse to hype some fic, amirite?)

But you, beautiful Ghoullette. If you have a story in your heart, you go for it. I'm so happy that you love Bookshop and I'm so happy that you're inspired to write for our space scoundrel. I do so love Ezra in a bookstore and can never have enough so please tag me so I can read it!!!! <3 <3 <3

(gif by dornish-queen)

[mothras-in-my-belly]

I know most of y'all don't really care, BUT! I'm starting a new job tomorrow at a bookstore after almost a year of being unemployed due to a badly broken leg that took absolute ages to heal, and then another two months of job-hunting. I've also never worked with books before, so I'm equal parts excited and nervous as all fuck. Hope everything goes well tomorrow, wish me luck!!

[chaithetics]

Fics for Palestine! 🖤❤️🤍💚

Hey, beautiful Tumblr besties!

Do you want a fic and to support a good cause? A super specific fic? Want to ensure you are fed those Monkey Man fics you're needing? Or have you sent me a request and want me to hurry up and write it (Sorry I do take my time with writing)? THEN READ

I will write and prioritise requests from you and have them posted on Tumblr NO LATER THAN MAY 31ST!!!!

All you need to do is send same day confirmation to me either in the ask box or as a message of donating to a fund or organisation on the Operation Olive Branch list! This could be a family's Go Fund Me page for evacuating Palestine, the UNRWA fund, or eSims for Gaza etc.

This is the Operation Olive Branch's linktree page

I don't know what the response will be to this, if miraculously so many people were interested that I was too overwhelmed I would come up with a new date or close temporarily and 'reopen' for June. We'll see how this does, but I will be regularly updating this!

I will write for the following characters:

Any Pedro Pascal characters

Any Oscar Isaac characters

Any Dev Patel characters

Any Fallout characters

Any Succession characters (not Old Guard or Greg lol but even Tom!)

Tommy Miller (TLOU)

Any The Bear characters

Marvel characters like Matt Murdock, Wanda, Bucky etc.

And more I just can't think of, you're more than welcome to ask about a certain character in comments, DMs or in my inbox before donating as well 🫶

What I will write:

I'll write fluff, angst, smut, or any combination! I will write plus size readers, poc readers, disabled readers etc. I will write female readers, and gender-neutral readers, I'm bi/queer so am happy to write wlw fics if you desire Shiv or some Wanda with an f reader or more straight ones- whatever you want! Requests can be as vague or as specific as you want!

If you want Kendall and Stewy's conversation the night before his wedding to Rava with some angst, you got it! If you wanted to request a plus-size reader to go on a bookstore date with a contemporary Ezra, you got it! It's pretty open to your dreams!

I won't write fics that are nonconsensual, 'dark', heavy kink, gore, vore, paedophilia, and nothing with under-18 readers or characters (this includes characters 'aged up' for a fic).

My masterlist is here for navigation and if you aren't familiar with my work but want to get an idea!!! Chaithetics Masterlist

Moving on.....

If you donate 5 USD, CAD, GBP, EURO whatever currency that fund is in:

I will write a fic with your request that is at least 500 words long and is posted no later than May 31st.

If you donate 10 USD, CAD, GBP, EURO whatever currency that fund is in:

I will write a fic with your request that is at least 1,000 words long and is posted no later than May 31st.

If you donate 50 USD, CAD, GBP, EURO whichever currency that fund is in:

I will write a fic with your request that is at least 4,000 words long and is posted no later than May 31st.

Why is this important?

We need to help out and do our part to not be complicit in Israel's genocide against the Palestinian people. Palestinians are begging for our attention and aid, since October 7th 2023, Israel has murdered over 35,000 Palestinians, displacing the survivors so many and committing numerous war crimes. Israel's expulsion, ethnic cleansing and war crimes have been terrorising the Palestinian people and land since 1948. We all have a part to play, so get involved with this if you like, please contact your local representatives and government, keep engaging with Palestinian content and voices, support the funds if you can- I know that's not accessible to everyone, attend rallies, protests, and vigils in support of Palestine. Do what you can, what is physically, emotionally and financially accessible to you.

I'd love it if you could share this as well, especially for my mutuals and others in these fandoms with much bigger platforms (I have a humble 300 followers, that I adore) and also for other writers to consider doing something like this! Thank you for reading this far, let's stay empathetic and support each other in these trying times 🖤❤️🤍💚

[guess-my-next-obsession]

Fade Into You

pairing: bookstore owner!ezra x f!reader

series rating: Explicit (18+ only, age gap)

summary: Moving to New York City in August, reader goes on a quest of self-exploration and love when she finds herself adopted by a close-knit group of artists and their handsome, older mentor.

Chapter One: New York, New York

Chapter Two: Holy Ground

[redgoldsparks]

January 2024 reading and Reviews by Maia Kobabe

I post my reviews throughout the month on Storygraph and Goodreads, and do roundups here and on patreon. Reviews below the cut.

Electric Bones volume 1 by Hazel and Bell 

Lucian is the son of a minor nobleman and the CEO of the galaxy's biggest AI company, but he's not so rich that he can't get in trouble. After being fired as a programmer from Echo Station he joined a startup with a couple friends and is now fishing for funding at an elite tech expo on board an expensive and exclusive space vessel. There he sees someone he thinks he recognizes- Ezra, a grey robot, an fully sentient AI who worked on Echo Station as a researcher and partially cost Lucian his job. So why is Ezra now working on the space vessel as an escort? Unless it's not Ezra, but just a look-alike robot model? These questions drag Lucian into the beginnings of tangled web of intrigue which include kidnapping, AI-hacking, and murder. I've been reading this story online as a webcomic for years; you can still read all of volume one here: https://electricbonescomic.com/index.... But last year I also backed the kickstarter, and just sat down to re-read the whole story in print form, including a sexy little bonus comic. I love these characters, I love the rich colors, the lovely sense of flow and design of the pages. I can't wait for volume two!

The Fox Maidens by Robin Ha

Action packed and exciting, this family drama is full of unexpected twists and turns. I loved the focus on female characters: passionate Kai, whose love of martial arts and sense of justice cannot be contained by the normal rules of Joseon society; her mother, Meorhu, a fragile woman with a surprising past; Sura, a thief turned mercenary; and the Gumiho herself, the deadly but alluring fox spirit who impacts the lives of all the others with her magic and charisma. The art is rich with historical details, beautiful nature scenes, and fast paced fight scenes. Lovers of ghost stories, kdramas, and queer re-tellings of fairy tales will find much to enjoy here. I was lucky enough to read an advanced copy of this book! Pre-order it now, or look for it in bookstores in mid-February 2024.

A Nobleman’s Guide to Seducing a Scoundrel by KJ Charles read by Martyn Swain

What a delightful return to Romney marsh! This book picks up 13 years after the dramatic conclusion of the previous installment. Luke Doomsday is now a secretary, looking for a new position in a large house were he can keep books and solve his master's problems. Rufus, the recently minted Earl of Oxney, formerly a major in the army and son of a draper, has problems. For one, he never expected to inherit and his uncle is doing everything he can to prove Rufus illegitimate in court. For another, the previous Earl of Oxney was a selfish old bastard who let the estates fall into terrible disrepair, while Rufus' timid cousin kept poor account of the estate's money in a chicken scratch handwriting. Rufus struggles to read at the best of times, and he can barely make sense of his newly inherited account books. When Luke shows up on his door, it feels like a godsend. The men are immediately attracted to each other, though both have reason to be wary. And Luke, in seems, may have come to Stone Manor looking for more than a job. This series is such a fun mix of spicy romance, action, mystery, and danger. I'm really enjoying the setting and time period, which is just after the end of the Napoleonic wars. I really hope there will be more books to come!

Translation State by Ann Leckie

No one is doing it like Ann Leckie! This sci-fi novel uses six different pronoun sets (actually kind of seven, except one is the same set just used culturally very differently by different groups of people). It’s fantastic. We’ve got they/them, e/em/eir, sie/hir, it/its, he/him, she/her, and she/her again except used as a universal pronoun regardless of gender (which works great inside the Radch Empire and badly outside of it). I'm on the fence about whether this book can be read as a stand alone, or if it would only really make sense after having read at the Imperial Radch trilogy and Providence. I suppose it depends on what level of baffling alien customs and politics you are willing to tolerate. This book opens with Enae attending hir grandmaman's funeral, only to learn that the seemingly wealthy old woman had sold her entire estate to a stranger before her death. For the first time in her life, Enae leaves home with a Foreign Affairs job: to see out a fugitive who left Presger space some 200 years prior. Enae isn't expecting to succeed, but sie gives it hir best shot- and in doing so completely upends the lives of a widening circle of bystanders including Reet, a man of unknown parentage, and Qven, a juvenile Presger. This book finally begins to explain this inhuman and terrifying species, and the reason why the Presger-Radachii Treaty defines the rules of so much of this universe. I deeply enjoyed this installment; it makes me want to go back and re-read the original trilogy.

Brooms by Jasmine Walls and Teo Duvall 

Set in an alternate 1930s, Mississippi, this story follows a group of friends and found family who have to hide their magic from the restrictive and racist government. They survive at the margins, but they don't let the fear of prosecution stop them from doing what they love: racing together as a team. Deep in the woods seers and witches host carnival like events where racers on brooms compete for prize money and glory. Each of them has reasons why they need to win; lives and futures depend on it. This book is deeply queer with a diverse and magical cast. If you're looking for historical fiction where the trans and lesbian brown witches win, this one's for you.

Boys Weekend by Mattie Lubchansky

Sammie is a recently out nonbinary transfemm but their college friend group has not picked up on that fact yet. When Sammie is invited to be the "best man" at their friend Adam's wedding and attend a bachelor weekend at a high-tech, no-laws resort built on top of the Pacific Garbage Patch they decide to go in stealth mode. The resort is a pyramid scheme mutated with a strip club, business conference, all you can drink brunch bar, pro-gamer, most-dangerous-game corporate nightmare. Also, the waters around it are infested with terrifying flesh-eating monsters and someone is trying to raise an eldritch god. It takes every bit of queer resistance Sammie possesses to survive this bleak, hilarious, and surprisingly moving tale. In both their fiction and nonfiction comics, Lubchansky continues to hold up the black mirror to our own dystopian times.

Belle of the Ball by Mari Costa 

A very queer high school rom-com comic with a satisfying message about growing into yourself and seeing others truly for who they are. It opens with a love triangle, but subverts that form into a more complicated shape by the end of the tale. Strong character designs and very effective limited color palette.

The Moth Keeper by K. O’Neill 

In a desert village, a group of folks choose to live a nocturnal life to keep the moon company, and to care for a small group of magical moths, the only creatures who can pollinate a magical tree which helps sustain the whole ecosystem. One youngster, Anya, volunteers for the important but lonely job of Moth Keeper. She yearns to be of service to others, and feels she must earn her place in the village. In reality, help and friendship are only an ask away, and in this space everyone is cared for. This is a very beautifully illustrated and brief tale of responsibility, community, and resilience.

Feeding Ghosts by Tessa Hulls

What an accomplishment! I savored every page of Feeding Ghosts, absolutely floored by the labor and courage that went into the writing of this book. The inking is gorgeous, the history is clear, digestible, and devastating. This book threads the line between honesty and compassion in a way that I appreciate so much in any memoir, but especially one dealing with family. Hulls lays out the story of three generations of women starting with her grandmother, Sun Yi, a Shanghai journalist who faced intense persecution during the rise of Communism in China, who penned a popular and scandalous memoir and then suffered a mental breakdown. This left her only daughter, Rose, a student at an elite boarding school with no parental figures and no other family to lean on. Eventually Rose earned a scholarship to an American university and in the end moved her mother into her California home. Sun Yi haunted that home during the author's own childhood. The unexamined trauma and codependency of Sun Yi and Rose drove the author to the extreme edges of the Earth, seeking freedom from their ghosts. But in the end, she stopped running from her family history and turned, instead, to face it. Shelve this book with Maus, Fun Home, Persepolis and The Best We Could Do.

I Keep My Exoskeletons To Myself by Marisa Crane read by Bailey Carr 

I really struggled with this book. I almost DNFed at 25%. Ultimately, I did finish it, and I am glad I did because I think the final act was my favorite part of the story. However, I think the title and cover set me up with expectations of what this book would be which were very different than what the book actually delivered. This is not science fiction- despite the fact it was nominated in the science fiction category in the Goodreads Choice Awards. It is only barely speculative. This is a book about grief, depression, and parenting a baby and then a young child as a single mom struggling with loss and borderline alcoholism. There were passages of the book which struck hard, individual observations and lines which rang like bells. There is also nearly no plot and I was frustrated by the lack of world building. I wanted to know more about the laws governing extra shadows- were Shadesters allowed to vote, hold passports, travel across state lines? Had anyone experimented with the removal of Shadows? When and how did cameras get installed in apparently every home in American, and how did the government hire and pay for a workforce of seemingly 1:1 surveillance agents to citizens? Also, how on earth did Kris manage to pay for a whole apartment on a single salary working a call center job, especially when as a Shadester she had to pay extra taxes? I understand that this is literary fiction, and these questions are obviously not the ones the book was interested in answering. But it felt strange to me that a book so focused on parenting would not include a single passage about struggling to pay for or arrange childcare. The "pop quizzes" that break up the text did not work well in audio, and did not add anything to my experience of this book. Ultimately, I would only recommend this novel to a vary narrow audience of readers who enjoy lit fic, and are willing to spend a lot of time in the POV of a character teetering on the edge of a mental breakdown through much of the story.

Atana and The Firebird by Vivian Zhou

Atana is a mermaid, but she was banished from her home to live alone on island for a reason she doesn't understand. One night a curious young firebird leaves her flock in space to come down and visit Earth, and she convinces Atana to go an adventure. They are soon pursed by magic hunters, but they also make friends, and end up as invited guests in the Witch Queen's palace. She makes them welcome in her massive library and gardens, but she also has ulterior motives. This is a fast paced story of magic, friendship, and young people slowly learning about the forces larger than themselves that shape their world and their lives. I really enjoyed the art, it has a very active, energetic line which serves the action scenes particularly well. I can tell the author came from an animation background! I am glad that the ending set up potential future installments in this world.

Portrait of a Body by Julie Delporte  

I really loved the colored pencil illustrations of this book, especially the botanical drawings, and the kind of abstract relation of the text and images. I thought the drawings paired extremely well with the hand lettering even if at times I struggled with some of the cursive capitals. This is a candid memoir of recovering from sexual assault and a dysfunctional relationship to ones body and sexuality, of stepping into queerness and self-acceptance. I couldn't really relate to the author's journey, but I appreciated the honestly and thoughtfulness with which the more challenging themes were handled.

Fool’s Fate by Robin Hobb read by Nick Taylor 

This book, and this series, has earned Robin Hobb a permanent place in my list of favorite authors. This story goes so hard, weaving together threads that are 9 volumes and 30 plus years of in-story history in the making. The final confrontations, reunions, and farewells at the end of this story were hard earned and so well written. This very much felt like it could have been a final volume of the Realm of Elderlings series, but I know that there are 7 more books to come and I can't wait to see what else this series has in store for me!

System Collapse by Martha Wells read by Kevin R Free 

This book picks up right after the end of the previous volume and I had, unfortunately, completely forgotten most of the previous plot. Once I got myself oriented I still had a great time with it. Wow, I just love watching Murderbot learn and grow and solve problems in unique and interesting ways! I kind of want to go back and re-listen to the whole series.

The Chromatic Fantasy by H.A. 

This comic blew me away. One of the most beautiful, strange, artistically ambitious and deeply trans books I've read in a while. Aesthetically, its as rich as a stained glass window or illuminated manuscript. Its narrative is psychedelic but emotionally it rings so tender and true. The story opens with Jules, a transman trapped in a nunnery who accepts a deal with a devil who promises to help him live as a man. Possessed and impervious to physical harm, Jules turns to a life of debauchery and crime. Then he meets another trans criminal, the poetic thief and thespian Casper, and they begin to fall for each other. They see each other as no one else ever has, they validate and treasure one another, but Jules' devil is a jealous master. The devil would rather see Jules burn than thrive. This is one of those books that made me want to draw, made me want to write, made me want to be bolder, weirder, freer, wilder in my story telling. An instant favorite, I expect I'll return to this over and over.

Mall Goth by Kate Leth

Liv's parents are on the verge of divorce; they've just moved to a new town and Liv will be starting at a new high school. At her last school, Liv was bullied for being openly queer and an unapologetic mall goth, and she is understandably hesitant to accept friendship overtures at the new school. However, a supportive male English teacher and a fellow goth gamer boy start to make Liv feel welcome. The goth introduces her to an MMORPG and the English teacher praises her essays and gives her Lolita. Both of them start regularly DMing Liv late into the night, more than is appropriate for the relationships they have. This book is in large part about a teen navigating confusing advances and how and when to disclose things that make her uncomfortable but feel hard to speak about or define. I thought that aspect of the story was handled very well. Some of the pacing in the friendship plot lines surrounding it felt a bit rushed, a few sections underdeveloped, but ultimately I think this book tackled an important issue not often seen in YA comics. It is also steeped in early 2000s Hot Topic/emo music/pop culture references- if you were there, you'll know.

What’s Wrong? Personal Histories of Chronic Pain and Bad Medicine by Erin Williams 

Williams illuminates, through memoir, interviews, and mixed media illustrations the extreme failures of the US healthcare system to address chronic pain. These failures are especially common for patients of color, patients who struggle with addictions, patients who are queer or survivors of assault and trauma. If you had any illusions that the systems of medical care are working in this country, shed them now. This book is half cathartic, half infuriating to read. I really appreciated the honesty and vulnerability of the interviewees and the trans and nonbinary inclusiveness of the language surrounding pain tied to the reproductive system.

[wannab-urs]

The Spreadsheet Digest - Fic Recs | Vol 7

Howdy, folks! It's time for this week's recap of what I read :)

As always, you can find the spreadsheet here, and you're always more than welcome to tag me in your fic if you'd like to be included. New and old fics both appreciated; anything from a drabble to a 400k word series is fine; and the only Pedro boy I don't really read is Pero Tovar.

Without further ado here are the fics I read this week and the unhinged ramblings of a madwoman (me) to substitute for a coherent recommendation.

One for the money, two for the show a Joel series by @cowgurrrl

Rockstar!Joel AU with such a sweet fake dating trope lead in and then the most delicious yummy angst. As your resident angst whore this was everything because it was so REAL and so fucking heartbreaking. And then the happy little hopeful ending and then all the drabbles and extras??? AH! My favorite part was the lil instagram stories i think <3

sharing is caring a Frankie/Santi one shot by @walkintotheriveranddisappear

Your friend Santi introduces you to his friend Frankie and uhhhh you guys go make a sandwich.

Only Lovers Left Alive a Joel series by @atinylittlepain

I love every single thing about this. Revenge. Vampires. Blood play kind of? Biting. Etc. This shit rocks.

Waiting Room a Joel one shot by @beskarandblasters

I fucking love what kel did with this song. The repetition of one for the road really fuckin got me too. Angst angst angst.

The Special One a Joel series by @toxicanonymity

What if a reluctant soulmates AU was also a vampire!Joel AU? It would be perfect, that's what. I'm loving vampire!joel rn anyway, but this was such a cool twist on it. Also his vibes in this are fucking immaculate

Copycat Killer a Joel series by @beskarandblasters

Bitch this is so good. Stalker!Reader x Rockstar Joel... fucking perfect. I love how they both kind of suck as human beings a little bit. And that blow job oh my GOD.

Sweet Creature a Dieter series by @wildemaven

I really really love how this story is going. The little town is so real to me and I love all the little places we get to see. The bookstore sounds like a DREAM. And I can't wait for Reader to bond with D over art ahhhhh.

Stitches a Din series by @djarinsbeskar

This fic is so fucking good dude. I love the set up for the whole thing and the reader character is really fuckin' cool. The like... 8 consecutive parts of incredible smut that continues to be genuinely interesting and really fucking hot even after like 200K words is extremely impressive. I'm also pretty sucked into the story and the way Medic is being interwoven into canon. Oh and the introspection we get from Din's POV is *chef's kiss*.... anyway pls god finish this story i need it

False God a Frankie series by @swiftispunk

Frankie asking for what he wants is so... yummy... especially when it's wanting to be your subby lil pussy eating king like... PLEASE. And his praise kink??? I am in Frankie heaven

102 a Frankie one shot by @tieronecrush

I fucking love this ahhhh. I felt so bad for Frankie but also their friendship is so cute??? I love the unrequited love//idiots to lovers trope

Safe in my Arms an Ezra one shot by @mishasminion360

Ezra struggling to adjust to having one less limb and me crying about it. This was so fucking good. The raw emotion he feels and reader's unwavering support... the realism in saying something that accidentally hurts his feelings and trying to take over tasks he might find difficult AGH. I love this so much

Leave Off Your Wandering a Joel series by @oonajaeadira

Adira, I fall in love with every single little world you create without fail. This is obviously no exception. Your sheep ranch is a dream. The way you build up this backstory with the Roostlings and the friendship with Tommy and Maria and just all these extra little details you take the time to flesh out and weave into the story... makes my heart sing, friend. I adore this <3

-------- fics i read a while ago and never recommended -------

Name a Javi P one shot by @joelscruff

Consent a Dieter series by @fuckyeahdindjarin

Whiskey, Dark and Deep a Jack one shot by @prolix-yuy

Stay on the Screenplay a Dieter series by jazzelsaur (ao3)

A Safe Haven a Joel series by @joelsgreys

Psychomanteum a Dieter series by @whatsnewalycat

In Name Only an Oberyn series by @forever-rogue

------

I haven't written a word in weeks, so once again no updates for me :/

-----

Happy Reading

[frannyzooey]

In The Dark: Epilogue

Pairing: Ezra x f!reader

Rating: None

A/N: We are finally at the end of this story - thank you to every single person who read it, who supported it, who sent in asks or reblogged or liked or lurked. I couldn’t have done it without you all. Dedications at the end, along with some bonus extras. Thank you all so very much - I love you, and Happy New Year!

Series Masterlist

--

EIGHT MONTHS LATER

“So, how is the new place going?” You rest your cheek on your knee, smiling at the immediate change in her expression on your screen. Your dorm room is behind you, warm and cozy in contrast to the starkness of her bedroom. 

“It’s okay,” Cee says. “It’s still kinda weird, ya know? Living with different people?” She shrugs, resting her chin in her hand. “It’s kinda cool, since they’re my own age and sometimes we have these amazing parties and there is this girl who is moving in next week who I am totally eyeing, but also the extra chores suck? No one ever does their dishes around here.”

You nod in sympathy, having been in that situation before. 

“I feel like it’s not that hard?” she continues, and you laugh. 

“It’s really not. How is that new class coming?”

Rolling her eyes, she launches into detail about her writing professor and the pain of her weekly workshop group and you feel a pang of longing to experience those things with her, so you could truly commensurate. Not that you couldn’t, since you were going through those specific pains in your own program right now, but it was different then - when you were going through it together. 

“Anyway, it’ll get better. I don’t wanna talk about it though.” She sits back, piling her fine blond hair on top of her head in a bun cupped by her hands for a moment, before letting it drop. “Tell me about next week. What are you doing again? How long are you off for?”

“Two weeks.” Just saying the words out loud makes you grin in relish, an eagerness for it to begin coming through in the dreamy tone of your voice. “I wanna see all the cheesy tourist spots for sure, but I am literally itching to get into some of those bookstores. And the museums, definitely those. And oh my god, the food.”

Shoreditch had all of these things and you had slowly been exploring them, but the vastness of London had been calling to you. Your workload too heavy to explore the way you’ve wanted to, you’ve been earmarking various spots for months and now that your break is finally here, you feel like you can truly tour around. And also look up from the screen of your laptop for a change - that would be nice.

You let out an aching groan of pleasure at the thought and she smiles on the screen. 

“After that, I don’t know? Don’t laugh, but I kinda wanna rent a car and drive to Cornwall? Don’t ask me about navigating while driving on the other side of the road because I don’t have an answer for you, but the views are supposed to be gorgeous and……”

“Poldark,” you both say at the same time, dissolving into giggles.

“God he’s gorgeous. I mean, I know he’s not there, but I’ll be able to sense him. I just know it.”

She sips her tea on her side of the screen while you list off the rest of your itinerary: Persephone Books, for their quaint, romantic store front and unique events, Dishoom for a bacon naan roll and to feel like you’ve stepped back into time into 1940’s Bombay, The London Eye to get some pictures, but first Gloria: a restaurant by your new place that you’ve been dying to try. You just knew the pictures online wouldn’t do it justice; the opulent, busy, lush setting of rich carpets and mirror paneled walls and greenery climbing down from the ceiling like sparkling, light strung ivy at the top of your wishlist. 

Eventually, your stifled yawns interrupt your spoken dreams, and she finishes her tea, stretching in her perch on her chair. She glances at the time in the corner of her screen and frowns. 

“Yikes, it’s gotta be so late there for you. You better get some sleep, so you’re not exhausted in the morning..”

You mirror her stretch, nodding. “Yea, I still gotta finish packing.” 

She leans closer to the screen, a look of affection stealing across her delicate features. 

“Well make sure you take a bunch of pictures, okay? I wanna see everything you’re seeing. Send me the view from the Eye on Snapchat or something and if you go see those guards, take a selfie with one of them just for me.”

You laugh, assuring her that you will and when you say your goodbyes and hang up, a smile lingers on your face. Just like her to ask for something weird like that. 

Standing, you close your laptop and leave it on your desk, walking over to your bed. The layout of your new place is tighter than the last; student housing always a bit cramped. You’ve never minded close quarters, liking the overall coziness it forces and resting your hand on the corner of a small bookshelf that already has a substantial collection growing on it, you crack the window, letting street sounds waft in on the night air. 

Changing into your pajamas, you switch out the light while yawning yet again and checking your alarm is set, you crawl into bed. Opening your white noise app, you select “city sounds” and closing your eyes, quickly fall asleep. 

–

Anticipation wakes you early, and similar to New York City, Shoreditch is alive with people already when you leave your flat. Stepping out onto the sidewalk, you slip into the crowd, making your way to the tube and as you walk, you run through a mental checklist of everything you want to do today, so as to not waste one minute. 

Not quite as many people on these streets as there had been in the city, the sights and sounds were so similar it was comforting: brightly scrawled murals over aged brick, trendy restaurants tucked into small store fronts, young people walking effortlessly down the sidewalk with their faces buried in their phones. Spotting the iconic circular sign that gave you a thrill when you saw it for the first time, you made your way down the damp stairwell, following the crowd to the platform. Getting on your train, you find a seat by the window and digging in your bag, you fish your earbuds and pull up a playlist, relaxing into your seat. 

The steady, smooth rock of the train as it pulls away from the station comforts you, reminding you of home after all this time. The transit systems are similar, the people that ride them even more so and watching scenery pass by, you think about your first time navigating The Underground. The thought, and the events planned for this morning, bring forth other memories. 

Your first night crawling into your new bed: slipping on the shirt he tucked into your bag, the longing for your apartment and all its familiar noises was a real, tangible ache in your chest. The ache for him was felt even deeper, the image of his face as he said goodbye only ten hours old and fresh in your mind at that point. A few tears slipped free into that new pillow of yours; the first of what would be many more. 

Your first weeks navigating your new surroundings: testing out the transit, finding your new travel paths, exploring the restaurants within walking distance.

The nervous hesitation you felt when sharing in your new workshop for the first time, the tiny tables in new restaurants where you sat alone on your computer, your delight at the discovery of East African food. 

Tea: something you never came around to. By your measure, it had nothing on coffee and for weeks, you would have killed for a latte from your favorite place, with a dash of cinnamon on the top. 

All the while, you had missed him. 

Your new surroundings had been seen through Ezra tinted glasses; a wash of him over everything you saw. Everything reminded you of him: the antique shop on the corner, the Persian restaurant you passed while walking to class, every bookstore or record shop or furniture gallery or men’s clothing shop or every dark haired man, your eyes searching for his confident gait everywhere.

At first, it was so intense you couldn’t hardly breathe, but with time, it lessened. Friends, routine, school, new experiences, dinners, parties. You still thought of him often, but it was no longer the crushing weight of a wave forcing you under. With each new day that passed, the waves calmed more and more; overwhelming, then bearable, then ripples that came and went.

Cee had eventually come around, writing you an email about your letter about a month after you left. When you replied, she replied back and it slowly evolved into more emails and then texts and then FaceTime, on your computer at night. She had reached out to you for writing advice, wanting your opinion on something she was going to turn in and it was like her story was an olive branch — which was fitting, for two people who first bonded over the words scribbled in her notebook. 

The two of you never had a formal discussion about what happened, but rather an acknowledgment through email about the roles you each played. Understanding that sometimes it was easier to talk about difficult things through writing versus speaking them out loud, you were thankful for it. She needed time to think about it, which you gave her, and in the end, she forgave you. 

Still, you never spoke directly about Ezra if you could help it. 

Four months into your new surroundings, you had just walked in the door after a late night library session when your phone buzzed in your bag. Pulling it out, the sight of his name on your screen made you freeze. You can still feel the heat you felt, your heart picking up as you hesitantly tamped down the excitement that immediately rose in your chest and when you answered it, he could hear it all in your voice. 

“Hello?”

“Hey, Birdie.” 

He said those two words, letting the silence hang for a moment and you were immediately back in your apartment, the memory of when he used to call felt so strongly you shut your eyes.

He had been drunk and lonely, missing you. Trying so hard to keep his distance for your sake, he finally caved and called; his low, husky voice sleepy and quiet through the phone, but warm with affection. You talked to him for a long time: about the city, about your program, about what he had been up to. When it came time to hang up, he asked if he could call you again and when you said yes, you could hear the smile in his voice when he said goodbye. 

He did call you after that, and you stayed in touch a lot. It wasn’t as intense as it was before — no phone call every night before bed, no FaceTime videos, no partially undressed photos — but rather an easy intimacy between two really good friends. Ones who knew each other inside out, and had fond memories of the time they’d shared together. 

Not to say that you didn’t get yourself off to the thought of him still, after all this time. 

You tried going out and meeting people, tried going home with someone a few times but after you slipped back into your clothes and made your way home, you never felt that longing to be back in their bed and in their arms the way you always felt with him. Eventually, you stopped trying and just focused on school. 

The train slows and pulls into King’s Cross, and you rise from your seat, waiting your turn to alight. Stepping off, you make your way to the escalators and a sort of nervous anticipation thrums wildly through your veins, making your limbs jittery. You try to take a calming breath, checking the time on your phone - your train running a few minutes behind, you hope you’re not too late.

Finally stepping into the atrium, light floods the space. People are everywhere: gathered in clusters as they check maps in their hand with suitcases and backpacks at their feet, business people walking briskly around and between them, travelers and students and children and shop vendors; the murmur of the collective crowd a loud one. Your heart beats faster in your chest, your eyes scanning the room and they land on one person after another, trying to keep track as they move. A bright flash of yellow there, a brown mop of curls there and suddenly, you see him. 

The familiar breadth of his shoulders faces you, a backpack that you’ve never seen before only serving to make him look broader. For how long it’s been since you’ve seen the nape of his neck, you’d recognize his stance anywhere and you simultaneously want to stand there for a moment and admire him from afar, while also fighting the urge to run. 

Not being able to help moving automatically in his direction, when he turns and his gaze catches yours, he grins and you feel a sudden wave of emotion so strong you want to cry. He looks just the same - the unruly dark curls, the crumpled cotton t-shirt even more so from traveling, the face you know so well and that dimple. It had only just started to fade from your memory, and the sight of it makes your heart burst. 

“Hey, Birdie,” he smiles when you reach him, opening his arms and you step right into them, like no time has passed. 

So solid, so strong, so affirming in his touch - your hello is muffled against his shoulder as you breathe in the familiar musk of his warm skin and when you pull back, you can already see the possibilities of these next two weeks in his warm, albeit travel worn smile: his laughter in a dimly lit restaurant, the weight of his arm across your shoulders when he pulls you in for a selfie, his profile as you drive through the country, the firm slide of his skin against yours every one of those nights. 

He looks like he wants to kiss you and your mouth longs for the same, but you both stand still, savoring the beat of anticipation; the crowd moving around you. 

“You ready?” you ask, lacing your fingers with his. 

He tightens his hold, grinning. 

“Ready.”

The End 

--

Bonus: Birdie’s Travel Pictures 

I have so many people I want to thank for this story:

@mourningbirds1​, first and foremost, who sat with me through every single one of these chapters and who is the world’s best and most patient teacher. You made my writing better with every single soothing message you sent, every comment you left on the document, every lesson you taught me in your kind and patient way. This story wouldn’t be nearly what it is without you, nor would I have had the courage to tackle it in the first place without your constant validation and support and I love you so very, very much. Having one of your favorite writers as a mentor is the literal dream come true, and you did that for me. <3

@krissology​ and @charnelhouse​ - without our group chat and your constant support, I wouldn’t have made it through this. You both inspire me in so many ways every single day, and you’re always there when I need to rant, vent, work out a plot line, hash out an idea, and I am so grateful to have both of you in my life. I love you <3

@highsviolets​ @imaswellkid​ @dazedrhapsody​ and @psychedelic-ink​ - thank you so so much for your constant enthusiasm and your magnificent playlists for this story. They inspired me in so many ways - a number of scenes in this story were directly inspired by your songs, dreamt of while I was working or driving, and I am forever thankful for you sharing them with me. They are beautiful, just like you all. I love you <3

To anyone that made art, to anyone that sent me a message, to anyone who was patient and kind and validating while I tried to take my time and try new things and grow - thank you. I couldn’t have done it without you all, and this community. I love you <3

[watchinghallmark]

Okay, here are my thoughts on the Hallmark Mystery movies and Hallmark+ programming!

Hallmark Mystery

🎄 This Time Each Year  Premiere Date: Thursday, Oct. 24 at 8/7c Cast: Alison Sweeney, Niall Matter Premise: Lauren (Sweeney) and Kevin (Matter) were once happily married and thriving as a family but the couple has spent almost the past year in a trial separation and are working hard to co-parent their young son Charlie (Ezra Wilson). Kevin is determined to make their family whole again and it’s clear he and Lauren still care for each other deeply. When Lauren’s mother (Laura Soltis) suddenly comes into town, she asks Kevin to pretend they’re still together as she hasn’t yet broken the news to her. As they try to keep up this ruse, they begin to remember what life was like and Lauren sees the strides Kevin has made to get back on the right path and just maybe, this holiday will be a season of healing and bring happiness back into their lives.

This sounds very sweet.

🎄 My Sweet Austrian Holiday  Premiere Date: Thursday, Oct. 31 at 8/7c Cast: Brittany Bristow, Will Kemp Premise: Charlotte (Bristow) is an American, who has lived in Vienna since inheriting a chocolate shop from her grandparents two years ago. Since then, she has worked tirelessly to grow the business into a successful enterprise. Christmas is one of the busiest times of the year and Charlotte has been selected as one of the finalists for Vienna’s chocolatier of the year. Taking home the prize could provide some much-needed money to fend off a large developer from taking over her grandparents’ shop. Charlotte soon meets and befriends Henry (Kemp), and they bond over their shared affinity for quality chocolate. But a surprising twist of fate just might end their newfound relationship on a bittersweet note.

Let me guess. Is he the developer? I feel like this movie doesn't quite belong in this group. I don't care for Britt but I do love Will so hopefully it'll be enjoyable.

🎄 Five Gold Rings  Premiere Date: Thursday, Nov. 7 at 8/7c Cast: Holland Roden, Nolan Gerard Funk Premise: When New York City painter Audrey Moss (Roden) returns to her small Minnesota hometown for the holidays, she’s met with an unexpected quest from her beloved late grandmother: find the owners of five mysterious gold rings and return them to their rightful homes before Christmas morning, only nine days away. In her bequeathment, Grandma also urges Audrey to team up with local private investigator and childhood friend, Finn O’Sullivan (Funk). From gingerbread house building to the annual Giving Gala, these two begin to bond over more than just their quest. As Audrey and Finn unravel the mystery of the missing rings’ owners, they discover there is more to their relationship than they ever expected to find.

Holland is one of my absolute faves so I'm excited for this one. I love a little holiday quest!

🎄 A Reason for the Season  Premiere Date: Thursday, Nov. 14 at 8/7c Cast: Taylor Cole, Kevin McGarry Premise: In order to earn her trust fund, Evie (Cole) is tasked with granting Christmas wishes to the people who saved her life on the night of her birth. To aid in her cause, she employs Kyle (McGarry), a handsome local attorney, to track down those who helped and attempts to secretly learn what they might want while maintaining her anonymity. With Christmas fast approaching, the heiress and the attorney can’t resist falling for each other’s charms as they ramp up their gift giving efforts. But as time ticks down, will she be able to accomplish the mission and grant all of the wishes by Christmas Eve?

What an interesting plot! I think these two will be really great together.

🎄 A Novel Noel  Premiere Date: Thursday, Nov. 21 at 8/7c Cast: Julie Gonzalo, Brendan Penny Premise: A successful New York City book editor (Gonzalo), who is losing touch with her passion after a few setbacks this year learns she was chosen to run a bookstore in the small town of Saint Ives for the month of December. While realizing a childhood dream, but butting heads with the handsome son (Penny) of the bookstore owners, she comes to realize that her love for bringing out the creativity of others is still her true calling, and untapped talent (and love) can be found anywhere… even in the writings of a cranky business-minded man, especially at Christmas.

Sounds cute and cozy.

🎄 Christmas Under the Lights  Premiere Date: Wednesday, Nov. 27 at 8/7c Cast: Heather Hemmens, Marco Grazzini Premise: Emily (Hemmens) is always reluctant to return home to her family’s animal rescue ranch — but when her mother passes away, her brother Nick requests her help organizing the annual Christmas Carnival. When she arrives, she discovers Nick’s friend, Luke (Grazzini), staying at the ranch — and that Luke was once a successful artist who works with light. Though initially reluctant to collaborate, Emily and Luke work hard to pull off the best, most light-filled carnival the town has ever seen, a healing celebration of Emily’s mother’s legacy and the magic of Christmas — and along the way feel sparks of romance as radiant as the lights themselves.

Planning events is never that appealing of a plot to me but this sounds like it'll have some heart and I really like both leads.

🎄 A Dance in the Snow  Premiere Date: Thursday, Dec. 5 at 8/7c Cast: Erica Cerra, Mark Ghanimé, Vanessa Burghardt, Dorian Giordano Premise: Melanie’s (Cerra) 17-year-old autistic daughter Jenny (Burghardt) is a senior in high school and looking forward to college. After a bad experience her junior year, Jenny is not interested in attending her final Christmas dance before graduating. Melanie decides to surprise Jenny by getting involved in the school’s planning committee to create a welcoming dance for all students. Meanwhile, Jenny and her friends secretly plan their own party, in part to honor Melanie. Melanie works with Jenny’s literature teacher (Ghanimé) on the dance and starts to fall for him while Jenny develops something special with a new classmate (Giordano) at school. When their secrets snowball, however, their plans begin to drive a wedge between the usually tightknit mother and daughter at the holidays.

This sounds really sweet. I love that they want to do something special for each other.

🎄 All I Need for Christmas  Premiere Date: Thursday, Dec. 12 at 8/7c Cast: Mallory Jansen, Dan Jeannotte Premise: Maggie (Jansen) has been trying for years to break in as a singer/songwriter. Now faced with challenges of new apps and social media, Maggie fears she’s outdated and unable to compete in a tech-savvy world. While helping her parents on their farm at Christmastime, she meets Archer (Jeannotte), an entrepreneur who has come back to town to spend the holidays alone. Archer is developing large-scale apps and is a tech enthusiast. At first, Maggie blames him for all of her songwriting woes. To her surprise, he encourages her to get back in touch with music that really matters and write from the heart; tech can be used in a supportive role to help her achieve her dreams without replacing the art of songwriting. Archer is dealing with loss of family, and through her tight family bonds, Maggie helps Archer find ways of moving beyond years of family feuding. In this holiday romance, Maggie and Archer both discover there is merit in preserving the tried and true while making room for new ideas and methods to bring people together and help make dreams come true.

To be honest, this sounds kind of lame to me but I'm sure it'll be cute.

🎄 Trading Up Christmas  Premiere Date: Thursday, Dec. 19 at 8/7c Cast: Italia Ricci, Michael Xavier Premise: Michelle (Ricci) is the dreamer of her family, always brimming with imaginative ideas to make the world a better place. This Christmas, her sister Keri desperately needs a new home, and Michelle hatches a creative plan to help. Starting with just a Christmas stocking, she sets out to trade her way up to something far greater—a house for Keri. While Keri dismisses it as a far-fetched idea, local reporter Dan (Xavier) is intrigued. Assigned to cover Michelle’s story, Dan follows her closely, and as her plan gains attention, he starts to see the world through her hopeful eyes. As Michelle and Dan grow closer, so do their feelings for each other. But when it seems her plan has failed and she fears ruined her relationship with Keri, Michelle is ready to give up. It’s Dan’s love and belief in her that reignites hope just when she needs it most.

I think this is a fun concept and I love Italia. I wish someone would get me a house.

Hallmark+

I'm really looking forward to both new fictional shows. I don't care about Wes' show at all. I'm excited about Finding Mr. Christmas. I think that'll be really fun and silly.

🎄 Unwrapping Christmas: Tina’s Miracle Stars  Release Date: Thursday, Nov. 7 Cast: Natalie Hall, Alec Santos Premise: Tina Mitchell (Hall), a successful business owner, meets a charming guy, Michael (Santos), just as her holiday season heats up with the town’s Christmas Gala and her busy store, All Wrapped Up. When the gala is threatened by a scrooge-like estate owner planning to sell the venue, rumors begin to threaten Tina and Michael’s newfound connection. As Tina works to keep venue’s doors open for the gala, she just might unwrap a new chapter in her life, filled with love and holiday cheer.

I mean... sure. Nothing to get too excited about.

🎄 Unwrapping Christmas: Mia’s Prince  Release Date: Thursday, Nov. 14 Cast: Kathryn Davis, Nathan Witte Premise: Mia (Davis), an accountant at All Wrapped Up, is stunned when local celebrity Beau Cavannagh (Witte), who looks just like her favorite romance novel hero, enters her life. Despite her doubts, Beau, an heir to a wealthy family, proves his feelings for her are real, even as his family disapproves. Mia soon finds herself swept up in a fairytale romance that’s straight out of her dreams.

Okay, this sounds really cute.

🎄 Unwrapping Christmas: Lily’s Destiny  Release Date: Thursday, Nov. 21 Cast: Ashley Newbrough, Torrance Coombs Premise: Lily (Newbrough), the marketing guru of All Wrapped Up, believes the universe guides us to our destiny and it appears that it’s guiding her toward a celebrity realtor. However, when she feels an unexpected spark with journalist Sean Whitlock (Coombs) during an interview, her heart starts to question everything. As her chemistry with Sean grows, Lily begins to wonder if he’s the true match she’s been waiting for all along.

And this one sounds lame.

🎄 Unwrapping Christmas: Olivia’s Reunion  Release Date: Thursday, Nov. 28 Cast: Cindy Busby, Jake Epstein Premise: Olivia (Busby), the gift-wrapping expert at All Wrapped Up, makes a delivery to a remote cabin only to find her ex-boyfriend Benjamin (Epstein) on the other side of the door. After the pair have a minor spat, an unexpected storm traps them together. Neither of them is happy to be forced to spend time together. However as talk turns to shared memories, old feelings and warmth begins to resurface and they are left wondering if it’s possible to get it right a second time.

I do love when people are forced together... but, on the other hand, it's Cindy.

🎄 Season’s Greetings from Cherry Lane  Release Date: Thursday, Dec. 5 Cast: Jonathan Bennett, Annabelle Bourke, Corey Cott, Sarah Dugdale, Shannon Kook, Vincent Rodriguez III Premise: In 1951, a doctor (Cott) wants to make the holiday special for his worried wife (Bourke) before he is shipped out to serve in Korea, but when she suffers a minor fracture to her arm his carefully planned out Christmas Eve plans are upended. In 2003, a newly married couple (Dugdale, Kook) who are always in agreement about everything hosts two sets of in-laws for Christmas Eve for the first time and find that they may not have had as much in common as they thought they did. And in 2024, a couple (Bennett, Rodriguez III) tries to arrange special Christmas surprises for each other but keeping them a secret may be harder than they thought.

I was very skeptical about getting 3 more of these movies but seeing the plan for them now has me interested.

🎄 Happy Holidays from Cherry Lane  Release Date: Thursday, Dec. 12 Cast: Benjamin Ayres, Catherine Bell, James Denton, Erica Durance, Julie Gonzalo, Ryan Rottman Premise: Good Witch reunion! In 1960, Eli (Ayres) and Penny (Durance) take in Eli’s curmudgeonly father, Walter (Serge Houde, Chesapeake Shores), and are forced to navigate some tricky family waters to get through the holidays while also working on a Christmas themed time capsule for son Alex’s school project. In 1998, we see Regina (Bell) and Nelson’s (Denton) first meeting: stuck together when a blizzard strands Nelson in Regina’s home on Christmas Eve. In 2015, Jessie (Gonzalo) faces a big challenge while planning her sister’s last-minute Christmas Eve wedding – the officiant is Tim (Rottman), her high school sweetheart, whom she hasn’t seen in almost 20 years.

I feel like all of these are going to have something different to offer and that's fun.

🎄 Deck the Halls on Cherry Lane  Release Date: Thursday, Dec. 19 Cast: John Brotherton, Erin Cahill, Brooke D’Orsay, Chelsea Hobbs, Benjamin Hollingsworth, Sam Page, Matt Dusk Premise: In 1966, single guy David’s (Hollingsworth) plans for a simple Christmas are dashed when his neighbor Stephanie (Hobbs) arrives with news that she won a contest to have Tommy Saunders’ (Dusk) Christmas Eve TV special broadcast live from her house – but used his address. In 1981, John (Brotherton) and Lizzie (Cahill) learn that this will be their last Christmas on Cherry Lane after John receives a job offer in Michigan and Lizzie finds out she’s pregnant. In 2000, best friends Matt (Page) and Rebecca (D’Orsay) find unexpected feelings developing as they try to find out who is behind a series of Christmas-themed random acts of kindness.

I'm also wondering what the connections will be or if they'll all tie in together somehow.

[trulybetty]

Sunday Week In Review on a Monday

How is everyone doing? Did we make it through the last week? Those who got a long weekend I hope it was a good one! Yesterday was a clusterfuck and I had the mother of all naps - the type where you wake up and don't know where you are let alone what day of the week it is lol.

So here is Sunday's Week in Review, on a Monday edition! 💕

Truly Betty Updates This Week…

Strings IV

Sequins

First Sentence Game

Fics I Enjoyed This Week…

A Girl Walks Into a Bookstore (Ezra) by @oonajaeadira

While I’m still undecided if I truly enjoy Prospect, I absolutely do love a good Ezra fanfic and this one doesn’t disappoint. It started as a late-night read last Sunday when I was the only one awake and once I started I couldn’t stop. It also seems to have popped up for a lot of other readers as I’ve seen it all over my dash since. @oonajaeadira master list is a joy to go through on Sundays at the moment. 

Until Now, Until You | Chapter 1 (Javier Peña) by @wildemaven

This was all the right levels of sexy and spicy and leaving you wanting more and I can’t wait to see how this plays out when the two run into one another again!

Leave off Your Wanderings (Joel Miller) by @oonajaeadira

This series is a total balm to my TLOU2 feels - this is the ending Joel deserved (and in my mind the official sequel to TLOU) and in the third instalment the autumn vibes are warm and cozy, and the build-up between Joel and Songbird is soft in all the right places. This whole series is a warm gentle hug and the writing is so good - definitely check this one out.

Hungry Hearts | Atlantic City (Joel Miller) by @atinylittlepain

I’m sad that this series is nearing its end, but that means I get to go back and read it again. Between flashbacks of young Joel with baby Sarah we’ve got Cherry and Joel reconciling in present day and never knew mini-vans could be so sexy, so check it out!

The Layover | Epilogue (Frankie Morales) by @goodwithcheese

This finale was bittersweet - it has been such a pleasure to follow this story, so much so that it was a highlight of my week. The story wraps up in a way that is perfect for reader x Frankie with them both on pace with one another. It’s done so perfectly that I read it more than once. I will be revisiting this story for sure.

Late Night Texts | Epilogue (Javier Peña) by @mvtthewmurdvck

Another fantastic story that came to a close this week *sigh*, this was just  the perfect ending. This story is a delicious rom com romp and I know will hold up to multiple reads. I don’t want to give anything away if you’ve not read it, but it’s a delight.

The Window (Dave York) by @wildemaven

This was a delight to read and Heidi crafts a great story of longing from a distance that has a soft ending that is all enveloping and lends itself to multiple reads. 

Bush Pilot (Frankie Morales) by @legendary-pink-dot

Oh boy, this one *fans self* this one was something else. Frankie taking you to see the sunrise but makes you see stars instead in the back of his truck. Oomph, all kinds of good spicy smut here that lends itself to a second read… or three ;) 

sam and diane, eat your heart out (Marcus Pike) by @chronically-ghosted

I could easily be biased as this was written based on the prompts I sent Taylor - however, Taylor blew it out of the park with our boy Marcus! This was spicy in all the right places and honestly, I would love to see more of these two. This is a take on Marcus Pike x Reader that I haven’t seen before and it will be on my perma reread list that is for sure! Also, peep the Cheers reference, *squee*

IRL | Part 2 (Javi Gutierrez)  by @grogusmum

I’ve had a hard time finding some good Javi G. fanfics, but this one here is so good in its characterization. The story of Javi meeting Reader for the first time since meeting online, is incredibly sweet and I had been waiting in anticipation for this second chapter since I finished the first. It’s also one of the few plus sized reader fanfics that nails it without going over the top and making the character a stereotype. I have this bookmarked to go back and re-read this week, because that ending has been living rent free in my head all week.

Private Dick (Tim Rockford) by @wardenparker

Speaking of plus size reader interpretations - this was one of the few that really resonated with me. I haven’t come across many Tim Rockford fanfics (if you have any others, please send them my way) - but this felt like a perfect interpretation - great at reading situations, until they’re too close to him, but he’s in a process of redeeming himself through his relationship with Reader.

Fics I’m Looking Forward to Reading…

My TBR List is still a work in progress, will share it when it’s done 💕

Light Me Up (Benny Miller) by @musings-of-a-rose

Thanks to Jess and Heidi I seem to be straying into Benny territory this week and have been recommended this story to dip my toe further in. I mean the opening premise alone is enough to have me excited to get stuck in!

Double Dealings (Javier Peña & Ezra) by @julesonrecord & @stardustandskycrystals

1920’s, New Orleans and the potential of two Pedro characters? I cannot wait to get stuck into this one this week over my morning coffee this week!

Posts I Enjoyed This Week…

@shirks-all-responsibilities reminding me of my grumpy Joel (Pedro) header for the mobile layout of my blog. Now has me thinking about making a seasonal one now! September is Halloween Eve of course! 🎃

@wildemaven’s early morning thot post that just took on a life of it’s own 🥵

@rhool’s live blog of the pilot of the Pedro show that never was ‘The Sixth Gun’ entertained me while I had a tame evening watching something Mr. Truly wanted to watch while sipping on a non-alcoholic beer lol.

Things I’ve Enjoyed This Week…

The long weekend - didn’t do anything, no one slept through the night, but there’s something satisfying waking up on a Monday and knowing you don’t have to work.

Saturday’s interactions and posts were a delight to go through and helped my Saturday working go by so much quicker and made for a more enjoyable day.

This Week’s Song…

This recommendation came from @gnpwdrnwhiskey who told me it was Dieter x Bryony coded and it totally is. I’ve listened to this on repeat and I’m dying to revisit these two again, and have something up my sleeve 🎃

Hope everyone has a great week this week and Monday is treating you well! 💕 xx

[nerdieforpedro]

Weekend Update 02/11/2024

Nerdie! It's the middle of the month, how are you?

Good. Nothing to complain about. Mainly relaxed and then worked Thursday and Friday. My orientee made me laugh.

Oh? How so?

She said that now that she's had some different preceptors she enjoys my balances of being a bit hands off since I know she's experienced, but still checking in during the shift to see how things are going. (Puffs out chest and also wonders if that's a good or bad thing.)

I mean, if she said it's fine, it should be fine right? Now did you do anything writing this week?

I did a bit. Not as much as I normally do. I'm gearing up for projects I have either agreed to or planned for myself.

My two fics are quite different. One was silly and sweet and the other was filth. Nerdie in a nutshell really:

Is it for the wallet of the shoebox? (Tim Rockford x plus size female reader) Tim being silly in a bookstore leads to a serious conversation and a partial photoshoot at home. Comedy and domestic fluff with slight spice.

One Pass for the both of Us (Lucian Flores x female reader x Benny Miller) You and your boyfriend Lucian have the same hall pass. All smut with sweatpants and gold chains.

Working on two things I promised people. One requested fluff and the other action and smut.

I decided to start a new series (because clearly I don't have enough - Dieter, Frankie and Tim give Nerdie a death glare) 👀 because this Pedro character was in my WIPs way before the three of you! Might even help me brainstorm…

Two Hearts by the Ocean will feature Javier Gutierrez x Abigail (plus size OFC). The vibe is sweet summer romance. Mainly fluff every Wednesday, not sure how many parts, at least five. Let me know if you'd like to be tagged for it. I have a few people in mind but if you'd like to be added, let me know. 😆

Roc & Doc and Weddings 101 with Dieter are still ongoing, no worries. Tim and Dieter have calmed. Frankie is a bit pissed still but you have the longest masterlist Fish! You don’t care…well. Okay. 🫡

I might be trying to figure out how to write Ezra. I love reading fics with the man, but his speech patterns have so many nuances to it. I've been studying @morallyinept aka Jett's Pedro Pascal Character Database that she's been compiling and her entry on Ezra from Prospect has been invaluable. It's an excellent reference for Pedro character fic writers or if you just wanna know more. She also has one specifically on Ezra’s speech patterns that I swear I’ve read at least four times.

It's me, I'm the problem. 😭 I’m either overthinking or not focusing on the right parts. Ugh…

Fics I read this week: ( I took time off work and had plenty of time to read - still didn't get to everything. 🥸)

Movie Night by @munsonownsmyass (Zach Ellison x reader)

No game at all (but I can do this) by @for-a-longlongtime (Marcus Pike x Tim Rockford - Frankie Morales floating in thots)

Wouldn't It Be Nice - Chapter one by @lady-pug (Agent Whiskey x female reader)

02 x birds - Frankie Morales x reader by @trulybetty

Mon Amour by @saturn-rings-writes (Jake Lockley x black female reader)

The Stars by @youvebeenlivingfictional (Poe Dameron x reader)

Mutual by @morallyinept (Ezra x female reader)

Dinner Party by @lavendertales (Steven Grant x fem reader)

The Mercenary and the Whore by @absurdthirst and @storiesofthefandomlovers

Comedy of Errors (MK Spring Bingo #3) by @soft-girl-musings (Steven Grant x GN reader)

03 x snowfall - Marcus Pike x reader by @trulybetty

Ambrosial by @spacecowboyhotch (Din Djarin x fem. black reader)

Half of you - part 1 and part 2 by @foxilayde (Santiago Garcia x female reader)

God Speed by @magpiepills (Tim Rockford x female reader)

Not for nothing @magpiepills (Ezra x female reader)

Perfect Fit by @lowlights (Frankie Morales x plus size reader)

To the Flame - chapter 5 by @pedroshotwifey (Dark Javier Peña x female reader)

Come back to me by @reallyrallyauthor (Poe Dameron x female reader)

If you’re not looking at @immarocketman ‘s art, then I feel sad for you. It’s beautiful 🤗 They put out a sketch of Din/Cobb this week that’s apparently going to have a fanfic written about it by @theywhowriteandknowthings

There was also an excellent head cannon about Sarah’s younger years by @clickergossip that resonated with me on Black girlhood. ☺️

That's about it until next week! 🥰

Stay hydrated and safe!

Love Nerdie 💜

[supernaturalgirl20]

Meet You There

Pairings: Ezra x f!reader

Warnings: Fluff, angst,references to sex, second chance romance, mentions of injury, low self esteem (Ezra).

Part of @toomanystoriessolittletime writing challenge

December writing Challenge

Comments and reblogs really appreciated 🥰

He felt nervous.

For the first time in cycles as he slowly approached the familiar bookstore. It was a simple red brick building with a bright red door and he supposed many passers by wouldn’t even give it a second look. After all, it was nothing special. It blended seamlessly in with all the other buildings surrounding it but he knew different.

This was the place where rare books could be bought. This was the place where a scoundrel like himself could weave through the aisles of old books unnoticed. It was the place where he met you.

***

As his feet carry him through the crowds a smile edges its way onto the corners of his mouth as the memory of your first meeting flashes through his mind. He’d been browsing some of the books from the old earth when you literally crashed into him, the pile of books in your arms obscuring your view.

“I’m so sorry, oh I’m such an idiot,” you said with a tinge of embarrassment, your cheeks reddening under his stare. He couldn’t help it, truly. He’d never seen anything more beautiful and he’d seen the rarest of gems. He helped you pick them up and carry them to a little nook in the back where you proceeded to talk and talk for hours.

He must have been good in a past life he had thought to himself the more he learned about you. You both shared an interest in literature, poetry and ecosystems and he loved the way your eyes would light up when you talked about something you were passionate about.

He made the first move. Leaning in and kissing you softly as you rambled on, the feel of his slightly dry lips on yours silencing you.

He was enraptured. You were like a siren in the books of old calling him to his doom and he would gladly perish at your feet. The soft kiss became more heated and then you asked him back to yours where you became a tangle of limbs and soft moans as he buried himself inside you.

His skin tingles at the memory and his cock stirs to life beneath his sweatpants. The memory of your naked form had kept him company on those long lonely nights on the green.

Now, as he stood staring at the doors to the bookstore that started it all, he can’t help the worrisome feeling that settles in the pit of his stomach. Will you be here? Would you want to see him if you were?

***

You’d both made an agreement way back when, that every year you would both meet here, same time, same place. Until such a time that you both would give up prospecting and settle down somewhere. That had gone on every year for six years until he became trapped on that Kevva forsaken moon.

Ezra pushes open the door, the small bell overhead signalling his arrival and as it closes behind him he quickly scans the store for any sight of you. A disappointed sigh leaves his lips as it becomes apparent you aren’t there. You had probably moved on. Met someone new, someone who could be there for you.

He moves slowly through the store, his feet carrying him to the aisle where you’d first met and he can feel the stares of the patrons boring into him. No doubt staring at the lack of appendage as the sleeve of his jacket hangs loosely at his side. At least he doesn’t have to bear the rejection you would no doubt have shown him.

His eyes rove through the new titles that have been added when a familiar voice echoes behind him.

“Ezra?” You almost whisper, and his body stiffens with shock. Is it really you? Have you really waited for him?

“Moonbeam,” he questions as he turns in the direction of your voice. He gasps at the sight of you before him, a hopeful look in your eyes. “Is it really you, Ez?”

He takes a step forward, slowly reaching his hand out, the need to touch so overwhelming. He nods his head, his eyes taking you in. You haven’t changed a bit and a warmth floods his veins as he thinks he’s finally found his home. “It’s me, I assure you. I..”

His words trail off as his hand caresses your cheek causing your eyes to flutter closed. “I cannot believe you're truly here, moonbeam. It’s as if all my dreams have come true, or I’ve finally run out of luck and met my maker.”

You open your eyes and smile brightly up at him, “I thought the worst last year Ez when you weren’t…I feared you were…” you gulp, unable to speak your worst fears aloud.

“I will not lie, moonbeam. I almost perished on the green moon but a saviour came and helped me leave that wretched place, albeit minus a limb.” He says, lifting the right sleeve of his jacket and your eyes drift towards where his arm should be.

“Oh Ezra. I’m so sorry you had to endure that. I should have been there….maybe this wouldn’t have happened.”

“Hush, do not blame yourself my star…if you had accompanied me on that trip it could have been you who perished and it would have killed me twice over.” His thumb rubs soothingly over your cheek before drifting down to your chin where he tilts it upward.

“Dare I hope that you have waited all this time for a lonely soul such as myself?” His voice is laced with hope as his eyes flicker from yours to your lips.

Your hand wraps itself in his sweater effectively pulling him close. “I would wait forever for you, Ez. You should know that.”

Before he can say another word you reach up and touch your lips to his in a soft kiss. His tongue teases the seam of your lips until you open for him. The kiss is aching and all consuming as your tongues caress each other. A throat clearing pulls you apart and he rests his head against yours.

“I think I’m ready to settle down now, moonbeam. If you’ll have me?”

“I thought you’d never ask.”

Everything: @maievdenoir @amneris21 @hnt-escape @elegantduckturtle @harriedandharassed @jediknight122 @ayrusss @hayley-the-comet @sherala007 @alexxavicry @scorpio-marionette @donnaa @practicalghost @tanzthompson @beskarprincessjenny @littlemisspascal @icanbeyourjedi @thatpinkshirt @maryfanson @sunnshineeexoxo @misspearly1 @misspearlssideblog @athalien @its--fandom--darling @sara-alonso @doommommy @browneyes-issac @trickstersp8 @nembees @kaitieskidmore1 @mswarriorbabe80 @allthe-ships @tintinn16 @hungrhay @rosie-posie08 @manuymesut @all-the-way-down-here @iccedays @dindjarinswhore @tusk89 @graciexmarvel @pedrostories

[scryptids]

madison iseman / she/her  ———  no way is that EZRA JAMES.. they’re a 27-year-old HUMAN notoriously known for being INSECURE  &  NERVOUS  but there are some people who have seen them being APPRECIATIVE  &  SENTIMENTAL.  if you ask me, they remind me a lot of softly lit rooms filled with the sound of music, glasses abandoned next to her laptop to give her eyes a break, empty tissue boxes collecting near the trash can, and heavy sighs in the dead of night, but that could just be because they’re considered the LOST around town. just keep an eye on them  &  see if their true colors shine through..

TW: parental death, car accident, trauma

full name: ezra jean james birthdate: february 14th age: 27 height: 5’2” occupation: horror novelist ship status: open bio:

when it comes to good things, ezra james drew the short end of the stick

born on valentine’s day to the most loving parents anyone could ask for, she was coddled from the very beginning

her father was an english professor at a small university in maine, and her mother worked at a bookstore just a few miles away

she was always surrounded by books and storytelling, both of her parents feeling that it was important that she have a vivid imagination while also taking on her own interests, and that’s exactly what she did

ezra began telling stories the second she learned how to talk, often sitting outside with her parents, keeping her hands busy with building small structures out of sticks while she recanted exactly who lived in the house

it was clear that she was a creative kid, and every year on her birthday she was gifted a new notebook that was quickly filled with her newest story idea

and when ezra wasn’t writing, she was reading; her room was full of built-in shelves, all filled with books that she’d already read and planned to re-read later on

her parents teased her that it was her own personal library, but ezra didn’t mind much

she was well-loved by her teachers and peers at school, and she could often be found surrounded by other children on the playground, hanging on her every word as she told them a new story

ezra knew early on that she wanted to be a writer, and so she took up every extra curricular and took every class at school that helped fuel her love for writing and reading

life was blissful for the james family until the night of ezra’s fifteenth birthday, and then everything went wrong

it had been raining, the wet ground freezing due to the cold february temperatures

ezra’s father was driving as carefully as he could, but with the terrible weather conditions and the darkness around them, he never saw the deer in the middle of the road

he hit the brakes, but the ice on the ground prevented him from stopping, and before ezra even had time to react, she had blacked out

days later, she woke up in the hospital surrounded by nurses, doctors, and police officers

she was the only survivor of the car accident, left with a large gash in her belly and some cuts and bruises from the shattered glass

ezra felt like the whole world had fallen beneath her feet in an instant, and she didn’t know where she would go or who she would live with; all ezra wanted was to have her parents back

she shut down almost completely even before she was sent to the metroplex to live with her uncle

he was her only surviving family member, and while he’d come to visit a few times and she loved him, it wasn’t the same

she refused to talk, refused to eat, and she definitely wasn’t sleeping, having a nightmare every time she closed her eyes, which resulted in her waking up screaming

life at school was difficult; she strayed away from making friends entirely, hoping to live out the rest of her high school career unnoticed

while she really didn’t want to, ezra had to attend therapy twice a week, as well as do monthly visits with her guidance counselor

she didn’t talk to either of them for a long time, mostly just planting herself in a chair where she could stare quietly out the window

in fact, she really didn’t talk to anyone at all apart from her uncle, and even then it was only one or two words at a time

her sleepless nights turned into hours spent at her computer, writing dark and twisted stories that would terrify any sane person, though nobody said anything because it seemed to be her only healthy coping mechanism

ezra published her first novel at seventeen, right before she entered her senior year of high school, and that’s when she decided to finally start opening up

it was at random; her therapist asked her a question, and she actually answered it for once; two years of progress boiled down to one singular moment

soon enough, ezra began to open up more and more, but mostly just to her uncle, guidance counselor, and therapist

she even managed to make a friend or two, not wanting to end her academic career completely alone

it’s been ten years, and ezra has made leaps and bounds in terms of opening up to people

she’s published five novels at this point, and is a frequent flier at between the lines publishing house; everyone there knows her name, and she’s quite friendly with them all

she’s closest to her editor, though, and has built up a very comfortable relationship with him

so comfortable, in fact, that she definitely has an unrequited crush on him, and pretending to act normal grows more and more difficult by the day

ezra even has more friends at this point, though the two she met while in high school are still her nearest and dearest, and she sees them quite frequently

she also has a very close relationship with her uncle, going so far as to purchase a home just down the street from him in the middle district and visiting with him almost every day

overall, ezra has had a long, hard healing journey, but it seems to have panned out for her

she’s still pretty timid around new people, choosing to silently observe rather than participate in the conversation

ezra doesn’t make it a habit to tell people her life story, not wanting to receive sympathy from strangers if she can help it

is currently working on her sixth novel, but has been experiencing a bad bout of writer’s block that her editor relentlessly teases her about

[panicsimss]

Associations tag game!! Since I got tagged twice (Thank you @shadowcursedballs and @aurorangen !!! <3 ), I'll do it for Poppy + Hudson! also sorry it took so long to get to this

ANIMAL: Lynx

COLORS: pine green, burnt umber, maroon

MONTH: October

SONGS: Black star - Radiohead, Theme of Laura - Akira Yamaoka, Wish you were here - Incubus, Shell - Bana

NUMBER: 11

PLANTS: poppies

SMELLS: dusty old t-shirts, patchouli incense, rain, cinnamon

GEMSTONE: carnelian

TIME OF DAY: 4 pm

SEASON: late summer / early autumn

WEATHER: cloudy, light drizzle

SKY: golden hour

PLACES: abandoned houses, record store, a friend's garage

FOOD: canned peaches, ramen, expired poptarts

DRINKS: root beer that lost all its carbonation, campfire coffee

SEASONINGS: pepper, chili powder

ELEMENT: copper

ASTROLOGICAL SIGNS: leo

MAGICAL POWER: healing

WEAPONS: baseball bat, swiss army knife

SOCIAL MEDIA: none

MAKEUP PRODUCT: eyeliner

CANDY: melted peanut butter cups

METHOD OF LONG DISTANCE TRAVEL: car / on foot

ART STYLE: messy pencil sketches

FEAR: death of loved ones

MYTHOLOGICAL CREATURE: satyr

PIECE OF STATIONERY: crumpled notebook paper

THREE EMOJIS: 🎸🌲🩹

CELESTIAL BODY: jupiter

now for my pathetic pookie bear Hudson

ANIMAL: Raccoon

COLORS: charcoal grey, denim blue, army green

MONTH: August

SONGS: Lost in the supermarket - The clash, Found out about you - Gin blossoms, In the blood - Better than ezra, Kiri - Monoral

NUMBER: 26

PLANTS: devil's ivy

SMELLS: cigarette smoke, gasoline, cheap aftershave, coffee

GEMSTONE: onyx

TIME OF DAY: 2 am

SEASON: mid summer

WEATHER: partly cloudy

SKY: dusk

PLACES: empty convenience store, messy apartment, a quiet corner in a bookstore

FOOD: grilled cheese, gas station hot dogs

DRINKS: cherry slushie, blue raspberry energy drink

SEASONINGS: salt, onion powder

ELEMENT: lithium

ASTROLOGICAL SIGNS: scorpio

MAGICAL POWER: the ability to turn into a bat

WEAPONS: folding chair, brick

SOCIAL MEDIA: none

MAKEUP PRODUCT: black nail polish

CANDY: skittles stuck in between the couch cushions

METHOD OF LONG DISTANCE TRAVEL: car

ART STYLE: sharpie doodle

FEAR: being alone forever

MYTHOLOGICAL CREATURE: VAMPIRE....

PIECE OF STATIONERY: post-it note

THREE EMOJIS: 🩸📓🚬

CELESTIAL BODY: charon

[guess-my-next-obsession]

Fade Into You, Chapter Two: Holy Ground

pairing: nyc bookstore owner au!ezra (prospect) x f!reader

rating: M (nothing much here really besides reader’s pining and ezra’s charm, definitely ooc ezra but it’s an au so who cares!, talks of money/wealth/privilege, a situationship forming in front of our eyes)

wc: 2.7k

a/n: just as a disclaimer, these chapters are going to range in length. i know some people really love short chapters and some really love long ones, but i’m trying not to focus so much on word count anymore, just gonna try to stop when it feels right (to me)! but i’m sure once we start seeing their relationship evolve, so will the length of each chapter.

series masterlist | previous chapter | FIY PLAYLIST

Mid October

“I feel like these are only ever good straight out of the oven.” Jay was standing in your tiny kitchen, taking a tray of store bought frozen Halloween cookies out of the oven.

“Yeah, as soon as they get room temperature they get hard as a fucking rock,” you agreed, sitting cross-legged on your beat up leather sofa with a bowl of popcorn on your lap. Halloween was queued up on your TV, the big light off with only the orange and yellow glow of the string lights you’d hung on your TV to illuminate the room. As Jay walked over with the entire pan, setting it down on the coffee table, their phone started to ring, the sound of a generic banjo filling the room. “You gotta change your ringtone.”

“It’s for the bit,” they said, tugging their phone out. “It’s Ezra.”

Your head whipped up to look at them, your eyes wide with interest as she pressed her screen to accept the call, putting it on speaker.

“Hey Ez, you’re on speaker,” they said.

“Hey, just calling to see what you’re up to,” he replied.

As Jay filled Ezra in on the movie marathon the two of you had been having since noon, you mindlessly shoveled popcorn into your mouth, watching the screen as though his face would appear if you willed it hard enough.

“Is that the girl you were telling me about?” he asked after hearing Jay mention you by name.

“Yeah, you two need to finally meet,” they said, giving you a wink and a nudge with their elbow.

“Well, I just got back in town and was going to invite you to meet me for a showing of Practical Magic in the park in an hour, but if she’s up for it, she can come and we can finally introduce ourselves properly.” Your eyes widened and head began to shake in a silent plea for them not to accept as Jay turned to look at you with a wide smirk, their amusement over your crush evident in their voice as they ignored your anxiousness and let him know that the two of you would be there before hanging up.

“Oh, I’m gonna puke,” you groaned, squeezing your eyes shut as you let your head fall back against the sofa. “I don’t have any time to prepare myself! I don’t even—what do I even—fuck.”

“Jesus, it’s just Ezra. He’s just a forty-four year old man who’s scared of commitment, not the fuckin’ messiah,” they teased.

“Yeah…you’re right,” you nodded, taking a breath of composure before standing up to walk over to your closet. “Alright. Super chill. ‘Hey Ezra, totally haven’t been fantasizing about you for the last month or anything. Super chill to meet you.’”

“Oh lord. I really do not get straight people,” Jay sighed teasingly, and you gave her a cocked brow as you turned around.

“Who said I’m straight?”

The city had finally started to cool down, the brisk autumn breeze hitting your cheeks caused you to shiver as your navy knitted sweater did its mediocre job at keeping you warm while you walked through a lamplit Central Park with Jay at your side, their pale skin turning pink on their cheeks and at the tip of their nose.

The park was still full of life even in the pale moonlight; lovers strolled together hand in hand to the soundtrack of giggles from children on the playground as their parents looked on, or a few lonely souls sitting in contemplation on the park benches, wondering where they lost that childish joy. You liked to try and imagine their lives, the happiness and the sadness looming in their history weighing on them in a way you could only ever imagine and never feel. Sometimes if you thought enough about these faces without names, you could feel your heart breaking for them and tears would swell in your eyes, but tonight you couldn’t muster the energy to ruminate on anything but your own life—of the anxiety you felt over finally meeting this character you’d created in your mind.

“Oh, there he is.” Jay’s finger pointed at a park bench where a lonely looking man sat scrolling through his phone, the blue light glowing on his face. “Ez!”

Ezra looked up, a smile growing on his face as he stood, tucking his phone away into his back pocket.

“Jay bird,” he greeted them, pulling them in for a fatherly hug. “Missed ya.”

“Missed you too, old man,” they teased, pulling away to point at you.

“Hi,” you smiled, holding your hand out for him as you gave him your name.

“Ezra—nice to meet you.” You felt a stab of insecurity in your stomach as his eyes bounced across your features for a beat, suddenly feeling all-too aware of each flaw you picked apart in the mirror just that morning. “This isn’t a line, but the way your eyes are sparkling right now is making it hard to look away from you.”

“Oh?” was all you could manage, your heart’s quick patter making it hard to think of anything clever to say, Jay’s chuckle finally pulling his attention away.

“Quit it, she’s shy,” Jay scolded, swatting his shoulder playfully.

“Is that right?” he asked, one side of his mouth lifted in a smirk as he turned back to you.

“Unfortunately,” you blurted nervously, earning a deep, crackly chuckle from him that helped to warm you up better than the wool covering your body.

“Hang out with Jay’s crowd long enough and soon you won’t be,” he said, turning to Jay. “Let’s go find a place to sit.”

You walked beside Ezra, Jay on his other side, and found yourself counting each step and breath as his warmth radiated against your arm. You wanted to lean in, slide your arms beneath his leather jacket and hold him so close that you could hear the beat of his heart, but for now, you stuck to counting your steps.

“So fill me in,” he said, his elbow nudging yours. “Who are you?”

You took in a necessary breath and shrugged.

“Not sure yet,” you answered honestly. “I’ll be sure to let you know when I figure it out.”

Ezra chuckled and nodded, a permanent smile on his face as he kept his eyes forward.

“Well, tell me what you know so far,” he urged before pointing at an open spot in the grass in front of the large projector screen.

“Uh, well, I’m a writer—“

“See, that’s good information,” he grinned, shrugging off his backpack to unpack a blanket. “What do you write?”

“Some poetry, some fiction,” you said, watching as he and Jay laid out the blanket.

“I’m going to go get some food from concessions, you two want anything?” Jay asked.

“Yeah, just a beer,” Ezra said, tugging out a twenty and handing it to her. “And whatever our writer friend wants.”

You smiled at him before looking to Jay. “I’m okay, thank you. Are you sure you don’t need help?”

“No, you two get acquainted, I’ll be fine.”

You gave them a subtle look of terror, only earning a reassuring nudge of their head towards Ezra as he took his seat on the blanket.

“So you’re a writer,” Ezra said, his eyes following you as you awkwardly sat down at the furthest corner from him, crossing your legs to take up as little space as possible. “Is that how you met Jay?”

“No, I actually met her in your shop,” you said, finding the courage and confidence to meet his eyes.

“And we haven’t crossed paths yet?”

“Well, we sort of did once—the first time I came into the store, but you were leaving so it makes sense—“

“You must’ve caught me on a bad day,” he interrupted. “Those eyes aren’t the kind of eyes I’d normally forget.”

“Still not using a line?” you chuckled.

Ezra smiled, looking down at his lap before meeting your eyes again.

“Not a line if it’s sincere,” he said, shrugging with a smile as he turned to look around at the crowded park, each group talking amongst themselves like the world consisted of just them, just like it felt with you and Ezra. “Are you from the city?”

“No, I just moved here,” you said, continuing on about your hometown and the stark contrast in environment.

“How are you liking the change?” he asked, leaning back to rest against one elbow.

“It was overwhelming at first, but in a good way.”

“How do you mean?” he probed, full of sincere interest.

“Just…the thought that I could be anybody here—it’s overwhelming but an exciting kind of overwhelming. I’ve just been trying to figure out where I belong in the midst of all this energy.”

Ezra’s smile grew into a grin, his eyes batting fondly at you as he watched you mimic his position, your body now achingly closer to his than it had been just seconds prior.

“What about you?” you asked in a whisper, turning your eyes to face the projector screen that started to glow with the start of the movie.

“Too long of a story to tell right now,” he whispered back with a smile.

“Make room for me,” Jay said as they returned with two beers in one hand and a tray of nachos in the other, nudging their chin at you to scoot closer to Ezra. You obliged with both hesitance and eagerness, once again counting your breath as his arm brushed against yours. “Here, can you pass Ez his beer?”

“Sure,” you said, grabbing the cold bottle and handing over to Ezra who sat on your other side, his warm fingers brushing against yours as he accepted it.

“Thanks, honey,” he whispered, and although the endearment caused your head to buzz, it seemed to be something casual to him, as if he called all of his friends these pet names. A good chunk of you hoped that wasn’t the case.

After the movie, Jay made up some excuse about going over to a girl’s house, leaving Ezra to walk you to the subway, his jacket over your shoulders even though you insisted you were fine (you weren’t).

“So,” you said, breaking the silence between you as you walked through the park to get to the 96 Street Station to catch a subway headed for your neighborhood in Harlem. “Are you from here?”

“I am,” he nodded, stuffing his hands in his pockets. “Born and raised. My family is sort of…I guess we’re old money. Or, they were. I’m just a bookstore owner.”

“With more money than God,” you added, earning a laugh.

“I’m trying to get rid of it,” he replied, shrugging.

“You don’t like being rich?”

“I recognize it’s a very privileged problem to have,” he chuckled. “But no, I don’t really care for all of it. I just don’t see why one man with no kids, no family, should have so much while other people are struggling. So, I spend every single day trying to pawn it off on other people, try to help distribute the wealth.”

“How’s that working out?” you asked, your eyes fixed on his profile as you walked, the streetlamps illuminating his skin every few steps, bathing him in yellow glow.

“It’s a surprisingly difficult thing to accomplish, at least with an accountant like mine,” he chuckled. “Sometimes I just settle for not making any more money. I price my books specifically so I don’t make profit, I let people stay in the apartments my family owned rent free. My father’s rolling in his grave, I’m sure.”

“How did you guys get so rich?”

“Prospecting,” he said, glancing over at you. “My great-grandfather owned a lot of land that had a lot of minerals and stones, or…something. I never cared enough to ask questions.”

“What an odd life you live,” you teased, earning a playful nudge from his elbow as you rounded the fence to walk into the subway tunnel.

“Tell me more about you,” he prodded, keeping his body close to yours in a display of protection as a strange man began to stare at you too much for either of your liking. “What are you writing?”

“Well, it started as romance, but then I scrapped that once I started really thinking about the character and what she wanted. I figured it wasn’t love she craved. What she really wanted was to prove to her mother that she was capable of being loved. So, that led me to where I am now, just a story of a mother and a daughter and all the traumatic shit that goes into that relationship.”

“What a beautiful mind you’ve got,” he said, his eyes on you as you looked down at your shoes with a bashful smile. “Do you know how it ends? Do they heal? Or does it stay broken?”

“Well,” you lifted your eyes to meet his, a playful smirk on your face. “I guess you’ll have to wait for me to write and publish it to find out.”

“My best friend owns an indie publishing company,” he shrugged. “Just let me know when you’ve got it finished and I’ll help you get in contact with him.”

“Oh, you don’t have to—“

“I like helping people who are passionate about what they do,” he interjected. “And I can see how much you love what you do, it’s what makes your eyes sparkle like that, even in this shitty subway light.”

“Are you always this good with your words?” you asked, bumping your shoulder into his.

“I sure try to be,” he smiled.

“Well,” you lifted and dropped your eyebrows. “Makes it hard for a girl to tell if you’re just being friendly or if you’re flirting.”

Ezra studied you for a minute with that closed mouth smile that he always seemed to wear, his eyes bouncing across your features even when you looked away from him in a fluster.

“I’m not…a partner,” he said, a careful lilt to his voice. “I don’t believe in…lasting things, at least in lasting love. I can’t be a partner to you. I’m the guy people sleep with until they find their partner.”

“I’m not looking for a partner,” you said, unsure of where you found the courage. “So, if that’s what you’re worried about, don’t. I’m new to this city, to all of this. I don’t want to jump into anything, I just want to…I don’t know…live a little.”

“Well, here,” he said, reaching into his pocket to pull out his phone. “Let’s trade numbers and just…see what happens. No pressure, no expectations, just call me when you need a friend, or…something more if you feel like it.” He smiled. “Whenever you feel like it.”

You only grinned and nodded as you typed your number into his phone, feeling as though you’d stumbled onto some sort of prize you weren’t qualified to win. You tried to silence the voices inside that screamed at you for even daring to believe that a handsome, kind, self-aware, rich man like Ezra, with a world of opportunities at his fingertips, would want you. You knew that you had your own value, your own beauty and intrigue—you were a prize, too.

“Can I take the subway with you?” he asked as you handed his phone back. “Not—I’m not trying to follow you home or anything, I just don’t want to stop talking yet.”

“You want to ride all the way to Harlem and back with me? Just to talk?” you laughed.

“If you’d let me,” he smiled. “I think you’re interesting, and hard to read, and…well, I guess the best word for it is captivating.”

“Where does ‘beautiful’ fit in to all of that?” you joked.

“I knew you were beautiful the second I saw that sparkle in your eyes,” he said, his eyes flickering to your lips. “That’s not what captivates me, that’s obvious. What I find uniquely interesting is your mind, your thoughts and where they come from, and especially the way you string those thoughts into words. That’s…that’s captivating.”

With no room to argue and no words to describe what his words meant to you, you offered him a simple smile and nod before the two of you were filing into the subway, that dirty tile floor becoming holy ground in the matter of a second.

[cruelsister-moved2]

yaaay thank you @jaggerbowiesextape <333!!!

last read

The Left Hand of Darkness by Ursula K Le Guin The thing I forget every time I read her is I don't start to really care about the book until like 60% through but I guess the last 40% is usually worth it. For me it gains a star for the unexpected Martin Buber reference but loses one for the fact they didn't have gay sex in a tent while traversing the icy wasteland together </3

A Dreamer's Tales by Lord Dunsany I am a dunsanator but this was honestly his worst so far like more self-conscious than his earliest but less sophisticated than his later work.

The Trembling of the Veil by W.B. Yeats Constantly had me wanting to google trembling of the veil ending explained and kind of made me wish I did more drugs.

currently reading

Laurus by Eugene Vodolazkin (trans. Lisa Hayden) I'm only 4% in but I think this might be the best book ever it's so beautiful.

A Swim in a Pond in the Rain: In Which Four Russians Give a Master Class on Writing, Reading, and Life by George Saunders Listening as an audiobook and the narrators are very fun and Saunders is a great orator. Mixed feelings on the craft talks, some of the points made are a bit too steeped in MFAology for me PERSONALLY.

Tales of the Hasidim: The Later Masters by Martin Buber Beautiful philosophy, folklore, theology, oral history in one. Some tzaddikim are less inspiring than others but the politicking and drama is part of the fun. Cringe when the translation says stuff like 'sabbath bread' but I'm being so brave about it. Also it has a beautiful cover<3 i got my copy for £7 at a used bookstore and just found out it goes for like £50 online so now I feel bad for folding over pages -_- Someone's written in my copy but it's only on one page and it's the name of a specific tzaddik they've underlined and put two big ticks around and wrote 'LEADER' adhfdihfafd

next up

wild: tales from early medieval britain by amy jeffs a la ezra, starting the world's smallest gayest book club out here

I don't usually think that far ahead because it depends what kind of mood I'm in when I finish a current book. I have some re-reads in mind and a ton of non-fiction I want to get to. Maybe the way spring arrives and other stories by Yu Chen (translated by a team of women and nonbinary people) if I'm in a short fiction mood! TAG @steeleyespan @mogblin @halomit @berrytart @37q @nutongzhi sorry i only tagged people who have recommended me books before so i know you read but im soooo serious if youre an oomf who reads i would love you to tag me in yours i want to see 🥺

[oonajaeadira]

Seriously, I have also read A Girl Walks Into a Bookstore multiple times. It's such a cozy comfy vibe and I just NEED that universe for a minute sometimes. I recently (2 weeks ago) tore my calf and spent the first week mostly laid up reading comfort fics and not commenting near enough. This was one of them for me (twice lol)

I cannot begin to imagine how painful that is and how many of drugs I would need to get through a torn muscle. But I will admit, it is an optimal time to walk into the Bookshop. Ezra likes to take care of folks who love him, so I hope he took good care of you!!!!

Are you feeling better?????