#experanto writes

[esperantoauthor]

Title: Express Yourself Author: Esperanto (@esperantoauthor​) Rating: T Status: Complete (129,413 words) Tropes/Genre: slow build, friends to lovers, AU S2 canon divergence, romance, friendship, light angst

Summary: When he was 4, he didn’t notice it. When he was 6, he hoped he could outgrow it. When he was 14 he thought he could ignore it. When he was 16, he tried hide it.

When Blaine is attacked for being different, he transfers to a new school where he meets a cadre of misfits called The New Directions, who seem very impressed with his singing and very curious about his past. Blaine just wanted to fit in but maybe he will find something better: his voice.[A canon-divergent story in which Blaine transferred to McKinley rather than Dalton after being attacked at his old school.]

Teaser under the cut. Read it on Ao3.

Chapter 1: Starting Over

Blaine woke up on the morning of the first day of school with butterflies in his stomach. They were the result of that confusing mix of anxiety and excitement that he had learned to associate with performing on stage. For his junior year of high school, he would be starting at a brand new school and he was determined to make a good impression. This year would be different. This school would be different. He would be different. Or, you know, less different… more normal.

After a hot shower, Blaine washed his face and then studied himself in the mirror. The scar on his face had faded until it was barely noticeable. Blaine smiled, feeling reassured that he would not stand out because of it. He had stayed out of the sun all summer long and rubbed special anti-scarring cream his mother bought him into it every day to make sure that by the time he started school in the fall, no one would be able to tell he had spent 4 days in the hospital last May.

The smile on his face faded a little as he remembered why he would be attending a new school this year. His parents, overprotective as usual, had insisted that he could not go back to Bath High School with the same boys who had had given him that scar. He had listened with his ear pressed to the door as their raised voices argued with his principal about an “unsafe learning environment” until the principal had agreed to call around to the other Allen County High Schools and see if he could arrange for Blaine to have a waiver to attend from out of district.

Luckily, the principal at the nearest school had signed off on the waiver without much fuss. Blaine knew very little about McKinley High School. He had been there once for an away game when the Bath football team played McKinley. The football team had been okay but their cheerleaders were truly impressive. His best friend, Elaine, had whispered in awe that they had won something like five national championships in a row.  Blaine had turned to google for more information and from what he could find the cheerleading team was McKinley’s one and only claim to fame. It had taken some digging, but Blaine had found one other nugget of interesting information about his new school: an article from a local newspaper about the McKinley High Glee Club winning at Sectionals last year. Bath didn’t even have a competing show choir but choir had always been his favorite class. Blaine bounced in excitement at the thought of being part of a small, exclusive group that competed and had actually won something. I wonder if you have to be a senior to get a solo, he wondered.

“BLAINE!” his mom yelled up the stairs, shaking him out of his thoughts. “If you want breakfast you’d better get down here, pronto!” Shit, I can’t be late on the first day.

Blaine pulled open his closet door to survey the outfit he had carefully laid out the night before: red pants, white collared shirt, and a black sweater. Thank you, past Blaine! He shimmied quickly into the pants and took a few moments to adjust his collar before grabbing his school bag and running down the stairs, two at a time.

“Blaine!” his father admonished, “What have I told you about running down the stairs like that? Do you want to end up back in the hospital?”

Blaine grabbed a plate of food and, with a mouth full of eggs, shrugged sheepishly at his dad. His father wrinkled his nose at him with disgust. “Alright, alright. I can see you are in a hurry to get to school. We will discuss this later.” Blaine carefully loaded his dishes into the dishwasher, leaned over to kiss his mother on the cheek, and saluted sartorially at his father before striding out the door.

—

Blaine parked the Prius in the McKinley High School parking lot and stopped to take a deep breath. He pulled a red folder out of his backpack and reviewed the school map and schedule the guidance counselor Ms. Pillsbury had given him last week when his parents had brought him to register. His father had done all of the talking so Blaine hadn’t really managed to ask any questions but he was pretty sure he could figure it out. He checked his hair in the sun visor mirror and nervously fussed with it. He closed his eyes and imagined a balloon slowly inflating and deflating as he took a few more breaths. You can do this.

Blaine hopped out of the car, settled his book bag over his shoulder, and avoided making eye contact with anyone as he entered the school. He managed to find his locker again and stow some of the extra school supplies he had brought before heading to English class. He arrived a few minutes early so he had time to survey the room and strategize about where to sit.

This was always an important decision for Blaine and if things were anything like his old school, the seat you chose on the first day could well be your seat for the rest of the year. Sit in the first row and everyone thinks you are a teacher’s pet or a show off, including the teacher. Blaine hated to be called on by the teacher in class so sitting too close to the front was dangerous. On the other hand, sit too close to the back and when it was time to pair up for partner work you got stuck with the slackers. So Blaine settled for a spot on the far right side of the room, right in the middle row of chairs. Yes, this would do nicely. He could blend right in from this spot.

Things had been going pretty smoothly until Blaine showed up for U.S. History to see written in large letters on the blackboard, “Please sit according to the seating chart.” Shit, shit, shit. Of course, the teacher had arranged her class in alphabetical order which put Blaine right in the first row between Desmond Adams and Rachel Berry. A girl with dark features and pristine posture primly settled into the seat next to Blaine and held out her hand, “Hi, I’m Rachel Berry. You’re Blaine Anderson. I saw that on the seating chart. You must be a transfer because I’ve never seen you before and they don’t let freshman take U.S. History. Are you a good student, Blaine?”

Blaine’s eyes widened and he felt something tighten up in the pit of his stomach. People who talked fast always made him nervous. It was even harder to rely on his strategies with someone who talked a mile a minute like this girl. On the other hand, she had managed to circumvent one of Blaine’s least favorite social interactions, introducing himself, so that was a big plus.  

Blaine reached out his hand to shake hers and nodded in response to her question.

“Excellent, then you should partner with me for any group work. Desmond is a complete parasite when it comes to group projects; never again.” Her voice shifted down to a conspiratorial whisper, “I think he smokes pot under the bleachers.”

Rachel seemed intense but Blaine was starting to think that might work in his favor. She clearly did not mind doing most of the heavy lifting in a conversation. Blaine looked for signs that she had noticed the fact that he hadn’t spoken a single word to her but she seemed completely oblivious. This was as good as he was going to get for a project partner so Blaine flashed her his most charming grin and nodded his agreement.

When the bell rang for lunch, Rachel turned back to him and studied him carefully. “If you don’t have anywhere to sit at lunch you can always sit with me and my friends. We may not be popular but it is better than sitting alone.” Before Blaine could respond, she had skipped off out of the classroom.

She might be the easiest person to not talk to that I’ve ever met.

[continue reading on Ao3; about halfway through the chapter]