#existing and the stress behind being known b4 i can contribute to anything
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All I've been doing recently is calling my friends on the phone all day and then talking about my little fighter guys. I'll go on here to queue a post and then disappear for days... it's bad. Tag rant
#alek insanity#i used to be pretty good at keeping up with people but something in my brain is fried and now the idea of talking to people consistently#overwhelms me. i either say everything at once OR i go missing for months at a time. i feel bad for it but i legit cannot sit down and#conversate with people. i love all yall. i love my friends. and i really appreciate every single one of you but i gotta get over my fear of#existing and the stress behind being known b4 i can contribute to anything#ik im ignoring dms and im ignoring asks and a million other things but its not out of malice#its almost 5 am and im making mozerella sticks in the air fryer#the alek schedule :#like after graduating i havent spoken to any of my irl friends outside of two parties and an occasional dm here and there#i dont even answer my moms texts 😭 and then everything piles up and i dont even want to look at it all#one day ... one day#i need to be taken apart and put back together or something#ive been pretty inactive everywhere tbh#even on twitter i take like 5 days to reply to ppl. buck knows#hey google how do you maintain friendships#im not in the same fandoms anymore but thats okay. my brain switches interests so often its absurd fkhdhd . i love my legoes. i love the#drama islanders . i swear#i swore... im going to break my monitir . ref#if i start posting again itll be about random fighter people none of yall recognize . its okay tho#i miss being into ninjago the community is sooo much better than b*ki 😭 shout out lain though#uhh#hey
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