#exdazai

[exdazai]

JET Results are out this week or next, and I’ve been living through 2 months of fear because I have done everything in my power to optimize my chances, and I was anything but awkward or nervous in the interview, but....There’s still that % chance of me not getting in, and my anxiety is kind of up the roof waiting for everything.

This has been plaguing my mind for 2 months, so if you’re annoyed by it now, I’m sorry. I just happen to be obsessed with this job opportunity since I’ve worked 5 rough years to get to where I am just for it.

[etherealbexuty]

GREEK GODLY PARENT QUIZ

Tagged by:  @haperx (thank you for tagging me!) Tagging:  @moonlit-theft, @cravingthesun, @vriendelijke-reus, @exdazai, @fcrgetmenct & anyone who wants to do it!

result: athena

Your godly parent is Athena, Goddess of wisdom and strategy, arts and crafts, battle and reason.

Athena's children are quick-thinking, witty, wise and responsible. As one of them, you are known to think several steps ahead, and plan for every inevitability. Children of Athena are also very sympathetic towards to those in need, and will do anything to help those less unfortunate than them. They also have no problems in sharing their knowledge with others, and you'll find them spouting facts about their favorite things all the time. Children of Athena have lots of patience and motivation, and once they begin a task, they will not rest until they finish it. Athena's children also are plagued with problems of pride and vengeance; they believe they are the best at everything and when crossed, will go to elaborate lengths to exact their payment. Because you appreciate the subtleties of intelligence and strategy, sometime you can be closed off to more emotional intuition and asking for help in these areas can be challenging. Athena gets along very well with Artemis, due to them having similar personalities. Children of Athena are also quite popular, if not for their intelligence, then for their ability to have a conversation with almost anybody.

qualities:  Brilliance, intelligence, wisdom, logic, generosity, kindness, pride, diligence, vengeance, order

[kouspromptothing-blog]

Sigh.

Dead forever

[spookyspiritking-archive]

“There’s no use crying about it.”

“No. Of course not. Death is a part of life.” The demon replied quietly. He crouched down next to the cat’s body, his red eyes taking in the sight of it. The poor thing clearly wasn’t treated right. If not for the human standing right beside him, he would take it’s soul right here and now and keep it as his own. But as it were, he simply closed the animal’s glassy eyes and made a silent promise to come back for it. 

Before he stood, the demon felt his blood boil thinking about the horrible people who would mistreat a sweet animal. His red eyes flashed with black purple flames for a moment, his rage taking over before he could control it. He quickly was rid of the flames with a shake of his head, and cautiously he glanced at his companion to see if the other happened to notice. 

[nnakahara-blog]

“people lie all the time.”

♠ Chuuya takes a drag. He doesn't smoke often. The slow burn of nicotine is somehow welcoming. If he had a nickel for every time the voice behind him (disembodied in space due to Chuuya's refusal to even look him in the eyes) teased him like this, rubbing his fur the wrong way, he'd be a richer man than he is. He'd be wearing Louboutins that he bought from the store. The ones he currently owns in a special corner of his closet were stolen off of a dead man's body in the gutter...And lovingly renovated.

"People," Chuuya relaxes back in his chair and burns the end of the cigarette against Dazai's table. (It's Dazai's fancy furniture, not his. An ashen mark is payback for this labor-intensive conversation.) "What people do you speak of? Us two? The mafia? Your agency? The world?" His head swivels to face the ex-mafia. Blue eyes widen on emphasis, dredged in sarcasm. "People do a lot of things, Dazai. You could, you know. Learn from them. Like you never do from your own mistakes. Over and over again." A red eyebrow forms an angled arch.

"Lying isn't good." He stands, rolls his sleeves up delicately, revealing strapping forearms covered in an array of bruises and freckles. After a pause, he forcefully bridges the gap between them by slamming his black-gloved open palm directly into the wall adjacent to Dazai's head. "Especially to me. You can't hide that easily-- somebody's gonna notice right when you think you aren't gonna get caught. This little bird's gotten real, real good at reading you like a book. And, frankly-- I'm not too impressed." His voice drips out like syrup, low enough to growl, a smirk with bared teeth flitting across his face as his breath knowingly ghosts across Dazai's forehead. His face darkens, and the words are murmured--

"If you pull that type of bullshit with me again, you're not getting out of it in one piece."

[idealsought-blog]

exdazai replied to your post:

-stalks-

[canisaevus]

❛ You trust me that little…? ❜

lieat sentence starters // accepting

The accusatory tone does not faze him in the least; it is a feigned hurt, for the Devil cannot be slain by something so insignificant. The question is airy, almost jocular, yet it carries an impossible weight that sinks into the rabid dog’s core. Akutagawa knows this is not a careless prod, but needlework with a frightening precision.

A breath of silence preludes the ripples in his thoughts, the calm threatening to turn tumultuous in a matter of seconds. It swells, an innumerable amount of words stuck to his palate that yearn for the air. Then it recedes, a voiceless exasperation tugging at his features in its wake. It leaves only vestiges of the storm that has formed within. He is in control of this deluge. For now.

What reason does he have to trust Dazai, the one who placed fetters ‘pon his heartless vessel? Each time he is confronted with this dilemma, rationality at the mercy of frayed strings that had been severed without warning. At times he will remember the fall and it is graceless — shameful. But one force does not waver: his wrath, all-consuming and insatiable, demands a sacrifice corporeal in nature. The commandments of the mafia dictate his every action; traitors will receive no magnanimity from a dog of hell. The only salvation he has to offer is DEATH. (Will you not accept what he can gift unto you?)

Akutagawa’s expression is a scowl, yet watchful. Wary. His words are arduously dredged from mire, syllables comprised of what has been buried long ago. “I do not have a reason to yield my trust to you in the first place.” A pause, two coughs following the string of words. “You will surely spurn it once more.” A reply bitten forcefully through teeth, yet delivered candidly. It is merely a truth he has come to terms with. The other must be aware of this as well.

Though ichor flows through your veins, your existence is godless ━ tainted an unholy black from your sins and corrupts even the ground beneath you if you so choose; each genesis at your fingertips is accompanied by inevitable ruin. Perhaps what is most fearsome is how you wield each breath as you would a carefully sharpened knife. Ambrosia drips from your tongue, a potent toxin disguised as honey descending viscously onto open, waiting palms. Your words are enough to instill rot and you are content to watch the putrid decay of all around you. You do not care for mortals. You never have.

But you have cultivated a beast with your capricious will, and you must meet its fangs when it does not intend to prostrate itself before you. (And it refuses to ever again, because nothing good has come from worshiping ghosts in human form.)

[etherealbexuty]

“I’m not a photographer, but I can picture me and you together.” (He may or might not want to see if vampires turn up in pictures---)

@exdazai

accepting | cheesy pick up lines

“Together with a handsome person such as yourself will make the picture even better. Am I right?” She will appear in pictures but chooses to not take them. Most of the time she forgets cameras do exists. She’s getting too old. 

[txintedsorrow]

❛ god, i hope you’re satisfied. ❜

HAMILTON : AN AMERICAN MUSICAL  → STARTERS- Accepting

 Sanity? Where was the fun in that?

 A mere puppet on a string was all he was. Smilling he took one step closer to destruction, letting his body surrender to the black demons clutching his heart. Nightmares. Dead bodies. Who he really was. A monster who wanted to bury the world.

 His eyes wide and devoid of colour. His voice a maniac shrill, a laughter of the gods of the underworld who decided to play with the living. His skin rotting, with blood pouring out of every crack. His every move was out of instict. He could not control this demon. Yet in the far back, the voice of a child kept on whispering to be freed.

Swirling black holes. Blood. Death. Death. Death. 

“HAHAHAHAHA.” It would ring in his ears. A laughter of a voice foreign to his own. Oh he could never be satisfied, not until every part of him had been CORRUPTED. He grinned, the grin of Hades who had come forward to drag everyone  to hell.

 His body wouldn’t be able to take it. His heart was ready to burst out of his chest. His lungs were giving in. But he still laughed. He still destroyed everything with that cruel grin on his face. Droplets of red mixed with black was all left of the man who once walked on this earth. 

As death was ready to welcome him to his embrace, an arm tugged him back and everything came to a halt. His heart echoed like a metronome, his lungs were screaming, his entire existence begged to be spared.  As his  senses started to dull a single sentence reached his ears.

❛ god, i hope you’re satisfied. ❜ 

Oh god no. He could never be.

[lodoratus-blog]

cont. with @exdazai​ from x.

she could only be grateful that she had to deliver papers to  dazai’s apartment after work, or else who knows how he  could have ended up. seeing the stool slip out from under him as a noose was rung tightly around his neck made her face turn pale as she dropped all of her belongings to save her co-worker. she remembered panicking, calling the  ambulance, and riding with him to the hospital. she paced back and forth in front of his room for hours it felt, until she was finally told that he was conscious. rushing to his side immediately, she was thankful that he was alright. she still wondered why dazai was always trying to kill himself, and it would always be a mystery to her, although she partially understood as well. upon his eyes opening, she gave dazai a warm smile as she gently pat the top of his hand. 

hearing him ask why threw her for a spin. why? she didn’t know, and apparently neither did he? he seemed to know what he was doing, so why was he asking her this. looking down, face solemn as she gave him her answer.

❝ i-i.... i d-don’t know, dazai-san. ❞

she answered quietly, looking up to meet his gaze while tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. a deep sigh escaped her lips as she continued.

❝ for a-as long as i’ve k-known you, you’ve a-always    tried to kill yourself, mutliple times–– even m-more    than once a day... i-i don’t know why, i d-don’t think    a-anyone at the agency knows why e-either. b-but i    w-wasn’t just going to let you die. ❞

[nnakahara-blog]

❛ ever wonder how different your life would be if that one thing never happened? ❜

♠ A chill, sobering his pale face and frosting his blue eyes, travels up Chuuya's spine. Just for a fun bonus, he feels his stomach sink, and he can't bring himself to look Dazai in the face as the same thought that dwells in the other's mind enters his. To avoid consequences, he squeezes his fist in his other hand and looks the other way, letting out a sigh (dredged with intentionally heavy annoyance, shoulders setting in a powerfully avoidant stance. Keep the pain locked, locked hard in your bones, ribs laced around a hammering heart.)

"I don't have to wonder." Chuuya says plainly. "I already know."

[idealsought-blog]

📷

If I receive 10 📷, I’ll record a tour of my house/city | Accepting ( 1/10 )

I’ll think about whether or not I want to show my house or the city ( mainly my neighborhood or more )

But if anyone has any special request in for a place you want to see of where I live then I’ll try to see if I could get there and not get mugged.

[corrruptionisms]

"Mori or Fukuzawa" -Stares intently with his iphone recording-

Send two names and my muse will say which they’d rather kiss. || Accepting

❝ Is death an option? ❞       And because death is not an option, he slaps the phone out of Dazai’s hand and takes a deep breath. ❝ Mori. I’m not kissing some ancient do-gooder. ❞ 

[canisaevus]

"Nothing good comes of getting involved with strangers." (( I love ERASED ))

ERASED sentence starters

Akutagawa’s brow furrows, the corners of his mouth tugged down as an abyssal gaze settles on the other. It is sound advice, as per usual from his mentor, the only things dripping from his lips poison or gold. (He appeared to possess wisdom of the world when his pupil had barely stained its soil with blood.)

But the light smile that rests upon Dazai’s face makes him wary, a sight he has learned to distrust. Was he being mocked? The thought solidifies as magma, thick on his tongue. “I am not a child. I know this.” Even if his bones had grown far too fast in the darkness, he did not need a lecturing about something as obvious as this. Wasn’t the one before him the reason he held fast to the aforementioned words?

[chxuya]

exdazai replied to your post:when ur 100th follower is a dazai blog

-STANDS UP AND CLAPS-

holds u in a no homo way,, thank ♥

[etherealbexuty]

I started with Juri last year on July 1, 2016. I honestly didn’t think her muse would stick with me for a whole year. Thanks to her, I got to meet so many new people from the Vampire Knight fandom, OCs, and everyone else from all the other fandoms that I’ve interacted with. Juri and I are utterly grateful for each and everyone of you who gave us a chance. She and I can’t thank you all enough.

In no specific order because you all are special.

@exdazai / @vriendelijke-reus / @moonlit-theft / @haperx / @thebloomingrosefamily / @poppicede / @remedialmelody / @reginae-noctis / @fiercysoul / @fcrgetmenct / @embersiisms / @electrxfy / @mizuiropearl / @arrogantlycompassionate / @thehandworld / @notyourregulargirls / @electorofhell / @argent-knight / @thegentleprincessyuuki / @devilslcg / @kcguya / @blessedfate / @cfdualities / @corvumortis / @ofnocturnes / @eaglespalaceseadoo / @huntaer / @wayward-innocent / @dualias / @akitoima / @bite-x-the-x-bullet / @sereinix / @quxxn-of-thx-damnxd / @porcelainghosts / @sadistic-sakamaki / @huntxr-of-cross-acadxmy / @kurxn / @beautifulillusixn / @the-crimson-haired-princess / @dualias / @the-bloodied-rose / @herresponsibiliity / @crimsonwingsandsnow / @amaranth-vitae / @ancientcalamity / @scatteredblueroses / @ari-rivaille-ackerman / @detectivewxlf-revived / @calamitous-x-monarch / @blonde-aristocrat / @adigidestinedandadigimon / @dandizumu / @facadesmiled

Also, excuse my amateur coloring skills. I tried guys.  I’ve been working on the juri coloring for 2 days in a row. So I’m not totally sure if my words make sense or not and if I missed some of you in this list that’s also why.