#except this time it's like twentyyyy times worse
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hi mtv welcome to my twisted mind
#phae.txt#hiii hi hi. been a hot minute since my last tag vent. actually been a while since i've said anything on this site so figured i'd update#architect school is a pain in THEE ass i love it and i hate it. she's everything to me and also my worst enemy.#can't live with her can't live without her. or whatever#thought it was sooo funny to see art accs i follow go into architecture & stop posting art all of a sudden#i was like damn thats crazy im sure ill be able to time manage enough to draw for myself though#HAHA NOOOOOOOO#it's cool though. first semester was wonderful despite having a prof i disagreed with heavily. this semester fucking sucks#due to having ANOTHER PROF that i regularly disagree with#except this time it's like twentyyyy times worse#the studio tea is ... scalding all the time actually there is enough drama in this major for a fucking sitcom or some shit#okay anyways. gender crisis came and went i've settled back on girl but like in a spicy fucked up way.#girl with an asterisk as emma airshipvalentine once said if ur out there emma that phrase has STUCK with me it is so versatile#what else. umm. social life is Interesting 2 say the least. have been shit at keeping up with ppl online thru text etc etc#utterly sorry about that. archi burnout real. i think summer vacay (two weeks left!!!) will remedy that though#social life in studio is interesting. it's very refreshing actually 2 be friends w people who don't do theater i did not realize#how much of my hs experience was saturated w that#i mean art school kids are not much different. but like. It's Different#UGH despise going 2 a uni known for its drama program bc the way my friend who Does do drama#talks abt their courses fills me with envy. what could have been. ALAS#i swear i do love archi she just does not love me back sometimes!!!! unrequited love in this mf#have also been thinking a lot about the concept of *******. college kinda bombards u in the face w that even more than hs did.#like goddamn somehow EVERYONE here is in a ************ it's!!!! ahhhhh!!!!!!! yuck!!!!!!!!!!!!! like good for them!!!!! BUT AGHHHHHH!!!!!!!#desperately need to unlearn the complex i have abt it at risk of becoming a bitter bitter old person. i refuse to confront it however!!!#so i will just keep making playlists god bless#what else is left. physical health has vastly improved in one way but deteriorated completely in like seven other ways. it's ok tho#once vacay starts everything will go back 2 normal im certain#terrified of doing smth irreversible idk profs have told us some horror stories but it's fine it's cool#3am now. heading into studio at 6/7 am depending on when these drawings get done. might nap for a half hour in the meantime#dance showcase at the end of the week along with our final studio review
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