#evil robot bill
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bueller-alf · 2 months ago
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bill and evil robot bill
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ashesfordayz · 2 years ago
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“Dude they're evil robot us's!”
More Bill and Ted art cause they are on my mind rn! ^^
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ria-coolgirl · 5 months ago
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Awesome art 🤩 @littledozerdraws
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duder doodles 🤘🎸💥
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doctorsiren · 15 days ago
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sorry for the lack of posting, I’ve been swamped with doing art for finals as well as just end of the semester stuff, but I replayed Portal 2 this week and drew up some thumbnails for fun
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gelarshiesprofruitboarder · 2 months ago
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my fav pic from the cards what are they doing. r they making them kiss. is that whats happening.
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notyoujamie · 1 year ago
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Borrowing from the past: — Fourth + Twelfth
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ria-coolgirl · 5 months ago
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Awesome art 🤩 @tacogrande
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hapy halloween tumblr dudes!!   🎃🎃 🎃🎃 🎃🎃
i hope u guys are safe and stay INDOOOOOOORORRS
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casuallyobssessed · 29 days ago
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Vicious Pastimes - Evil Robot Ted x Virgin!Fem!Reader ❥ 2.6k Words
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A/N: Completely self indulgent fic. I spent a lot of time mulling over this. Sorry if it's a little weird. Let me know if you see any mistakes!
Warnings: Dead Dove content, dub/non-con, P in V Sex, minor character death, virgin!reader, graphic depictions of blood/blood play, mentions of violence, no use of y/n, no beta
Archive of Our Own Link
Blood is everywhere. Your hands are barely visible through the blinding red as you press your shirt down against the hole in Ted's chest. With your heart racing and hands trembling, you knew there was no way he could survive something like this, yet you hold pressure anyway. Sobs rip from your throat as you apologize to your boyfriend who lay motionless beneath you. None of this is fair. 
Laughter rang out from behind you, cutting your mumbling apology short. You sniffle and lean back, smearing blood across your face as you wipe your tears away. 
“Crying won't bring him back, y'know,” Evil Ted snickers.
You can't dignify him with a reply. Instead, you lean down and brush the stray hairs out of Ted's face. As much as the look suited him, you hated the fact that his unruly hair made it impossible for him to see clearly half the time. You try your best to ignore the now glassy look in his eyes. The quiet stillness, the unusually pale skin… none of it is him. Your Ted is gone. All that's left is the evil robot version of him that ripped his heart out, and will now, presumably, take your life, too.
“Dude, c'mon. This pussweed isn't worth the tears, you've got the better version right here.”
Evil Ted crouches down beside you, brows furrowed in confusion, like grief is a foreign concept to him. That's probably because it is, you realize. 
“Will you just kill me already?” You ask him, stone faced.
“Kill you? No way. Why would I do that?”
“Why wouldn't you?” It was your turn to be confused.
“Wasting a babe like you before getting to try out the goods would be most heinous. I can see why Ted was so into you,” Evil Ted grins and gestures to your breasts, covered only by your lace bra. As all the adrenaline has worn off, you suddenly feel incredibly exposed as you're looking down at your crumpled, bloodied shirt resting on Ted's chest.
This isn't how tonight was supposed to go. You and Ted were supposed to have a date night; order pizza, watch a movie at his place, and you were going to ask him if he wanted to finally go all the way with you. As cliche as it was, you wore your best bra and panties to show off for him, not some evil robot version of him.
You fold your arms across your chest to hide yourself from his prying eyes as much as you can. Evil Ted's grin turns into something more sinister and you can almost see the gears turning in his head. 
“Don’t tell me you're getting shy now,” He sneers. 
By the time you can process what's happening, you're already being shoved backwards, not-so gently smacking your head against the kitchen floor. Evil Ted leans over you, arms caging you in on both sides. He stares at you, smiling in a way that doesn’t quite meet his eyes. 
“Get off of me!” You pound your fists against his chest, but he doesn't budge.
“What did you see in him besides the huge dick? Did he at least make you cum?” He asks, ignoring you. 
“Huh?” His question stuns you enough that you just look at him, dumbfounded. What kind of questions are 
these?
“I bet he hasn't, dude probably didn't even know where the clit is.”
“Ted and I haven't had sex. We talked about it, but I wasn't ready.” 
“Shit, does that mean you're a virgin?”
You nod, feeling the heat of embarrassment creep into your cheeks.
“Dude, no way!” Evil Ted's eyes light up at your confession, adding to your discomfort, “That's gonna make this so much more fun.”
“What?” 
Evil Ted laughs at your confusion before sitting down on your stomach, effectively straddling your torso and keeping you in place. Something grabs his attention by Ted's body and he looks away from you for a moment, reminding you of your proximity to your dead boyfriend and just how alone you are now. 
You're pulled from your spiraling thoughts when he reaches down and presses his hand into the stagnant puddle of Ted's blood that has pooled beside his body. His gaze bounces between you and the blood dripping from his fingers before he gives you another wicked grin. You can't imagine what he's thinking, but it can't be good. 
You thrash against Evil Ted, but his strong, robot thighs hold you down while his thumb presses against your lower lip, pushing insistently until your mouth opens wide. 
“Stop! Stop, stop, stop!” You cry out, but it falls on deaf ears. 
“I love it when you fight back, babe. Gets me real hot,” He smirks and slips his fingers in your mouth. You gag at the intrusion as the metallic tasting liquid coats your tongue. Frustrated and enraged, you let out a groan as angry tears spilled from your eyes. 
“You're pretty when you cry,” Evil Ted murmurs, “What does he taste like?” 
There is an inquisitive glint in his eye as he pushes his fingers further into your mouth. Biting down on his hand proves useless. He is mostly metal, after all. 
Your chest heaves as you sob. The last thing you intended to do was give Evil Ted exactly what he wanted, but you couldn't help crying. You've never felt so defeated in your life. 
You were powerless to save Ted, too weak to save yourself, and losing hope by the minute. The entire situation makes you feel sick. From the salty-sweet iron swirling through your senses to the weight crushing your middle, your stomach is tied in knots. It doesn't help when Evil Ted bends down and removes his fingers, only to replace them with his tongue licking curiously into your mouth. You wonder what the combination of spit, blood, and hatred tastes like to him. 
Evil Ted's hand starts to roam your chest, lingering on the lace fabric covering your breast. His fingers run along your bra until they find the center clasp between the cups and unhook it with ease. You're only a little impressed by how easy he makes it seem with one hand. 
Trying to think about anything other than Evil Ted's tongue halfway down your throat, you focus on the way his hand grasps your breast. A thumb brushes over one of your already hard nipples, inciting a low hum from you and sending a warmth straight to your core. 
Playing along with his weird advances hadn't been part of the game plan, but if it gets you out of here alive, it might be worth a shot. 
“Fuck. Look at you,” Evil Ted growls appreciatively as he pulls away from your face, licking the remaining blood from his lips. 
The last thing you wanted to think about was how disheveled you probably looked. Blood coating various parts of your body, puffy eyes, tear stained cheeks, all topped off with your tits hanging out. By the hungry look on his face, he clearly liked what he saw. 
He confirms your suspicions when he takes one of your nipples into his mouth. His tongue circles over the sensitive bud sending goosebumps spreading across your skin. You close your eyes, searching for your happy place. This way, it almost feels normal. 
At least it does until Evil Ted takes it upon himself to bite your nipple. Your whole body jumps from the sudden, harsh sensation and your eyes fly open. He looks pretty pleased with himself by the expression on his face. 
“Seriously? Do you have to be such an asshole?” You huff at him. 
“It's in my programming, babe. Now do me a favor and get on your knees.”
Evil Ted pats your thigh while standing up, allowing you room to move. You hesitantly follow directions, shrugging out of your bra while repositioning. The moment you get settled on your knees, he's pushing your upper half towards the floor, giving you only a moment to catch yourself before hitting the ground. Something akin to ‘fuck you’ finds its way out of your mouth before you remember the situation you're in. 
There's a brief second where you try to lift yourself back up, but he's got a steady hand between your shoulder blades. Cheek pressed to the grimy tile, you come to terms with the fact that you're not going anywhere. 
“Stay down.”
You nod. It's a simple command, but his tone is nothing like you've ever heard come from your Ted's mouth. 
“Good girl.”
Those words spark an unfamiliar fire somewhere deep in your gut and a new, bright pink flush across your cheeks. Behind you, Evil Ted is making quick work of pulling down your pants for you, revealing your matching lace panties. His warm hands caress your ass, giving you an appreciative smack as he lets out a low whistle. 
“The view from back here makes me glad I killed that loser. Dude had no business dating a babe like you if he wasn't gonna take advantage of the full package.”
You roll your eyes and wonder if it's too late to try to crawl away from him. Would you have any real shot trying to run away from an evil robot? Chances are you could make it a couple feet at least before he tackles you. 
After a little bit of musing in your head, you decide it's not worth the off chance that he decides to just kill you out of frustration. Your main goal is still survival, and you try your best to remember that as he unceremoniously yanks your panties down your thighs. 
His fingers find your surprisingly dripping wet center and his touch makes you gasp. You're ashamed at how your body has been reacting to him. You weren’t expecting to be turned on at all, much less to this degree. 
Slowly, he dips one finger inside of you, and it's the most gentle he's been with you throughout this entire situation. He's met with little resistance on your part. One of his fingers already feels like too much and you're whimpering embarrassingly beneath him. 
“How the hell am I supposed to fit my dick in here if you can't even handle two fingers?” He snaps, sounding mildly annoyed. 
It's not your fault that you’re not used to this. You haven't done anything like this before. How can he expect you to be comfortable moving this fast?  
After adding another finger and pumping them in and out of you briefly, you hear Evil Ted undo his jeans behind you. You turn and watch him as he shoves his underwear and pants down, far enough for his cock to spring free. You let out an unfeigned gasp at how thick it is. 
He was right about one thing. Fitting him all inside you was going to be a challenge. You're hit with a fresh pang of guilt when Evil Ted lines himself up with your entrance. He eases the tip in, graciously giving you more than a couple seconds to adjust to the stinging stretch that brings tears to your eyes. It wasn't long before he decided he didn't want to wait anymore and shove himself all the way in. 
“You are so,” Evil Ted growls as he bottoms out inside of you, “fucking tight.” 
He wastes no time in pulling all the way out and 
thrusting back in again, hard. Your body rocks forward from the force causing your arms to collapse beneath you, landing you nearly face first on the tile, again. You let out an involuntary, high pitched whine as he slams into you. 
“You liked that, huh?” Evil Ted goads, gripping your hips tighter and thrusting in harder this time. 
Your heart knows this isn't your Ted, but your body clearly isn't convinced. Clenching your walls around his dick and moaning his name was not sending the message that you wanted him to stop. You are taken pleasantly by surprise when he reaches around your hip and begins toying with your clit. Maybe he isn't completely evil. 
“Beg me for it,” Evil Ted’s breath ghosts across your back, sending chills down your spine. 
Okay, maybe he was still fully evil. You do not want to beg him for this. Saying it out loud makes it real, and you're not sure if you're ready to face that, yet. 
With your lack of an answer, his touch on your clit slows down to a halt. The painful aching in your core is growing and you’re starting to think you really do need that release from him. 
“Please?” You sound unsure of what you're asking for.
“Please what?”
If you could look him in the face, you'd be glaring daggers at him right now. 
“Fuck. Please let me cum,” It comes out more like a whine than you intended. 
It's enough for Evil Ted to take mercy on you. Teetering on the edge of bliss, it doesn't take much for him to shove you right over with a few more firm circles of your clit. You could swear you're seeing stars. 
This isn't how you imagined your first time would be, yet here you are, letting yourself get wrecked by Ted's evil robot clone. Being disgusted with yourself isn't enough to stop you from completely losing yourself in the intoxicating euphoria of cumming on his cock.
While you're shaking, being fucked through your orgasm, Evil Ted seems to be following close behind you. His thrusts are getting sloppier, his breathing quickens, and the grip he has on your hips is sure to leave behind fingerprint shaped bruises. 
With a guttural moan, he finishes deep inside of you. The good news is that it didn't take very long for him to finish, but now there's an uncomfortable fullness in your cunt as you feel his cum begin to drip down your thigh. 
How does that even work for a robot? In all honesty, you don't really care. You're just glad it's over. The breath of relief you exhale is cut short as Evil Ted grabs a fistful of your hair and pulls you back towards him. The sudden pain makes you squeak and jerk against him, but his grasp is firm. 
“That was most excellent,” His sarcastic tone was not lost on you, “Next time, I'll totally go down on you. Promise.” 
“We are not doing this again,” You scoff, knowing there's no way in hell you'd willingly do anything with this asshole ever again.
His grip tightens, yanking your hair again and hissing in your ear, “I could keep you here, y'know. Use you whenever I feel like it. That'd be a pretty sick trade-off for getting to live, huh?” 
Not sure how to reply to that, you just growl at him. This asshole has a way of leaving you speechless in all the wrong ways. 
“That doesn't sound like a no to me, babe.”
He lets go of your hair, letting you drop down to the floor again. There's comfort in the cool tile this time. At this point, you don't actually care what he does with you. After what you've allowed this robot to do to you right next to your boyfriend's corpse, you're sure that wherever Ted ended up, he's not too thrilled with you. You hope there's no way for him to know in the afterlife, but you've got a feeling he does. 
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I gotta know if emma-may was into the whole death-robots thing
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stargiirl27 · 8 months ago
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evil bill and ted would love cocaine I think
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ria-coolgirl · 5 months ago
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Awesome art 🤩 @jelly-powder
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oooo they’re so evil oooo they’re totally not gonna make out after destroying bill and ted’s place
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starlahuskyz · 2 years ago
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Had an itch to draw evil bill and ted so I redrew one of my favorite scenes 🤘
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awesomefridayca · 2 months ago
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Podcast: Speak No Evil & The Wild Robot
Greetings programs! This week on the show, we’re talking about two new-to-home video releases. First up, Speak No Evil is a remake of a 2022 Danish film starring James McAvoy. Then we dive into the world of The Wild Robot, a lovely new film from Dreamworks Animation starring the vocal talents of Lupita Nyong’o, Pedro Pascal, and more! Join us! Continue reading Podcast: Speak No Evil & The…
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annoyangle · 4 months ago
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You have any favorite puppets, besides the ones you use? Think like, muppets or whatever.
SURE DO! I LIKE LOTS OF PUPPETS, MUPPETS, YUPPETS AND TUPPETS! NUMBER ONE! THAT GUY THAT COMMUNICATES MOSTLY VIA SOUND EFFECTS!! NUMBER TWO! THE YIP YIP MARTIANS! NUMBER THREE! RANDY FELTFACE -NOT A MUPPET, BUT NEVER FAILS TO MAKE ME LAUGH!! AND NUMBER FOUR, THOUGH I THINK THEY STOPPED EXISTING IN THIS DIMENSION: GLOVE AND BOOTS! THAT BIT THEY DO ABOUT DOOMSDAY NEVER FAILS TO BRING A GIGGLE TO MY EYE!
BUT OF COURSE, MY FAVORITE PUPPET OF ALL IS THE ONE THAT'S READING THIS RIGHT NOW! YOU! YEAH YOU, THE TUMBLR READER!! THANKS FOR LETTING ME SQUEEZE UP IN YOUR BRAINMEATS AND GET ALL COZY!!
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ria-coolgirl · 5 months ago
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Awesome art 🤩 @barbequebarf
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doodles (ft ET and EB in tha middle bc i love them) + a lazy ref sheet that i only made to keep colors lol
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chaos-in-deepspace · 1 month ago
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LADS Zayne: A Few More Minutes | SFW
I'd like to apologize if this isn't my best work. I debated not posting this because when I initially tried writing it, I was at work and I was overstimulated, so I don't know if it makes perfect sense. I tried tho, I really did.
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Pairings: Zayne x Reader Warnings: Angst with Comfort, Nightmares Disclaimer: This is an original fan work for “Love and Deepspace”. Do not repost on other platforms or plagiarize. All characters shown in this fic is 18+.
Blog Information | Masterlist
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Zayne
It had confused you at first, his hesitance at the start of your relationship. Before you two even began dating, he had been on edge with the thought of you sleeping under the same roof as him. It wasn’t until you had come into his office that one day that you found out why.
The nightmares.
He had been sleeping in his office, probably exhausted from work. It was a fitful sleep, and by the time you got over to him, he was in a full blown panic. You had woken him up, let him hold onto you, let him breathe and calm down.
Zayne initially never wanted you to see that, never wanted you to have to wake up in the middle of the night to his whimpers as the nightmares plagued his dreams almost every night. That was until you had insisted on staying the night with him, telling him it was okay.
He had woken up, as per usual, tears staining his cheeks and his heart hammering in his chest. It was different this time, though. He could feel your hand running through his hair, the scent of your shampoo pressed against his nose, and your soft voice whispering that he was alright.
His arms had instinctively wrapped tighter around you, not daring to let you go. You were the only thing grounding him as he buried his face into the crook of your neck.
You had never seen Zayne truly cry, the time when you saw his episode in his office he had managed to hold back. This time, however, in the comfort of his own bed in the middle of the night, with you wrapped up around him, he couldn’t help it.
He didn’t make much noise, but you could feel the wetness of his tears as it ran down your neck. Your hand never stopped playing with his locks, doing your best to comfort him. However long he’d need, you’d be happy to stay there for him.
You weren’t even sure how long you two had laid there with him in your arms, but you do recall how his body had slumped as he managed to calm down enough to fall back asleep, never uttering a word about what happened. Your eyes had grown heavy after that, seeing him now peaceful in your arms.
Then you woke up to the sound of birds outside, your alarm ringing on the bedside table as you groaned. Zayne was still in the same position he had fallen asleep in, slowly rousing from his own sleep.
“Zayne…?” You murmured, checking the time. You were used to him being the first one awake to get ready for work, but in your sleep addled brain you recalled he had the day off.
Zayne groaned against you; despite what everyone seemed to think, Zayne wasn’t a robot. He didn’t like mornings, especially early ones. He knew the importance of making the most of his day though, and making it to work on time, so he’d wake up before the sun even came out normally. So seeing him groggy like this was a treat, the stubborn side of him winning out as he didn’t want to start the day.
“Zayne, come on.” You murmured, “I gotta get ready for work.” As much as you didn’t want to work, you understood it was a necessary evil to pay your bills.
“No,” the word slipped out of Zayne’s mouth before he could even register it, his arms wrapping tighter around you, “Stay here.”
You felt like your heart was melting as you brushed his bangs out of his face, catching a glimpse of tired hazel eyes staring at you, “Are you suggesting I play hooky today?” You teased; the ever responsible Zayne was trying to convince you to call out of work.
“I can write you a doctor’s note…” he murmured, his head nuzzling into you, “Just gimme a few more minutes.”
“Are you sure it’ll only be a few?” You asked, knowing he was falling back asleep already. His nightmares always tended to leave him more exhausted when he woke up.
“Mhn…” he couldn’t even bother with a response as he closed his eyes.
“Fine, I’ll text Captain Jenna and tell her I caught a cold.” You said leaning over to grab your phone, but his grip on you tightened again, “Zayne, I need to at least tell her something.”
“Just a few more minutes.” He tried again.
“You got five minutes before I roll over to text her, then I swear we can relax for the rest of the morning in bed.” You settled on, your arm going to curl around him.
In the end, it was more than a few minutes as you both drifted off to sleep.
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