#everything i do is bc of kikis influence

[voniive]

osjack collection

[vancilocs]

In thirds, cain and mercer, max and roo, and krea and trias?

yeet

1. What is their relationship to each other?

Together, married, soulmates, whatnot

2. How did they first encounter each other? What did they first think about each other? 

Mercer was trying to kill Cain and almost got killed himself, Cain went to check what the fuck happened and found a guy with no arm bleeding out and dragged him to a safe place + healed him against his better judgement. Mercer basically thought Cain was a dangerous bloodthirsty mage and Cain was both scared and annoyed at a hunter finding him, not to mention the hunter looking quite a bit like the one who shot his ear off when he was 14

3. What is their relationship like now? 

Living together in the forest, learning magic, appreciating nature, appreciating each other, very much in love

4. What will their relationship be like in the future? 

Together until the end of the line, no breaking the bond they have built

5. What traits does each person find endearing in the other? 

Cain is calm and level-headed and has a much subtler way of showing affection, so he’s a very grounding influence on Mercer which he can appreciate. Cain realized through Mercer how nice it is to be openly and unashamedly loved and how good it is to share everything nice in your life. Both are also very passionate about their interests and good listeners, eager to learn and support

6. Which traits does each person find annoying in the other? 

Mercer can be loud, brash, lose focus (makes things like meditating hard), he’s needier than Cain attention-wise so sometimes Cain just gotta ask to be left alone for a moment (Mercer doesn’t mind that at all, he gets it). For Mercer, Cain is a slower teacher who takes his time introducing Mercer to magic and its aspects, so Mercer can get frustrated bc he wants to learn how to make lightning already

7. How often do they see each other? How often do they talk to each other?

They see each other pretty much every day, if not the whole day then at the very least they spend the night together most of the time. Rarely the other goes on a longer trip and might be away overnight or a couple of nights, but still sends birds to the lover to reassure everything’s okay

8. Could they live together easily? Why/why not? 

Not in a city but both really enjoy their nomadic lifestyle and each other’s company so the way they have is good for them

9. How much physical contact would these characters have with each other? 

Oh a lot. And with Mercer’s wooden arm he gets to finally give Cain some good hugs, hold his hand more and even do his hair if he allows. Mercer is more touchy-feely and Cain doesn’t mind it most of the time. Also cuddled up is the best way to sleep

10. What would they get for each other as birthday gifts? 

They don’t really give gifts, especially when living together. Earlier Mercer would always bring sweets from the city when he went to the forest to see Cain but now they probably don’t even celebrate birthdays.

-

11. What hobbies do they share, if any?

Music (Cameron plays, Max appreciates), maybe makeup? Max will contour Cameron and give him a bit of a 5′o’clock shade before he goes on HRT. Also videogames probably though Max is less of a gamer

12. Do either of them have any hobbies or interests which annoy the other?

No, Max is a huge supporter of the band and Cameron her first makeup channel subscriber

13. Do any of their beliefs (religious, moral, or otherwise) differ? Do they conflict strongly? 

Nah? I doubt either is super religious or anything. They agree on things and don’t do things that piss the other one off

14. Who is the better cook? Who is better at general household tasks? 

Max is a great cook and is happy to make dinner for Cameron too, also probably somewhat neater than Gamer Bro McChickenNugget over here

15. Which of them is more adventurous? Is the other adventurous enough to go along with them? 

Cameron is rowdier and took Max along during high school days, nowadays she doesn’t have much time but supports him wholeheartedly

16. Would they go on holiday together, and where would they go? 

Probably have gone before, city holidays and/or beaches especially after top surgery are great

17. When one is feeling down, how does the other respond?

Ask about it, offer to bring snacks, offer a shoulder to lean on, offer advice if they have some or solutions, just be there and present and ready to help if asked

18. If one was in a difficult life situation, what would the other do for them? 

Anything really, they’d let the other live with them, borrow money if needed, borrow clothes or makeup or whatever, mi casa es su casa

19. Has one ever had to stop the other from making a very foolish decision? And did the other listen to them? 

When Nevan came crawling back Max told her no of her own volition but Cameron would also have told her to tell Nev to fuck right off. But Max didn’t listen to him before when it came to that woman

20. Has one ever strongly encouraged the other to make a big decision? Did they go through with it? 

Cameron always told Max to dump Nevan (and she did a couple of times but in the end it was Nev who ended that farce). Max told Cameron to be straightforward with his feelings towards Jules bc she could see how much it was dragging him down after years of pining

-

21. How would one feel about the other being in love (with them or with someone else)?

Krea is aromantic and doesn’t date, but he does love Shae with all he has in his own way, so idk how Trias feels about that. Krea doesn’t really care about Trias’s love life, but wishes she finds happiness and stability in her own life. Just please not with Shyn she’s so annoying. He wouldn’t want Trias to be in love with himself either.

22. Are there any other people who are a part of both their lives, e.g. friends or family members they share? 

Both associate with Remy, Krea is definitely not his friend though. He tangentially associates with Shyn too by letting her kill evildoers. Qizare is a friend of them both, Vastravia loves Krea and... Trias not so much. Tolerates her if anything. Vosgi doesn’t like her, Jun is neutralish, a bit negative. Shae likes Trias more than you’d think but is also careful about getting too close.

23. How does each person feel about the other person’s family members and close friends? Do they get along with them? 

Krea doesn’t like any of Trias’s friends except for Kiki.

24. Do either of them get jealous over relationships the other one has with friends/family/romantic partners/other people? 

Krea doesn’t, Trias might. Krea has his handful (three) of lovers past and present and does show PDA with them so if Trias is annoyed by that then tough shit lmao (also he has loving familial relationships with Kiki and Vastravia and speaks highly of his parents which Trias lacks so that might make her jealous)

25. Is either person jealous of the other’s wealth or possessions? 

Nah. Neither flaunts it. Krea’s most precious possession is his rifle, he’ll give Trias his old cloak himself

26. If the pair of them had to look after a young child or pet, what would happen? 

Krea is suspiciously good at looking after children and being a dad, wouldn’t let Trias touch it though

27. How far would each go to protect the other? 

Very far, neither is shy about going to the extreme if the other is in serious danger. Trias went mano a mano with Athena of all people to keep her off Krea and later skulked around his hospital room and caught Lyla red-handed so

28. Is there anyone else that each person would protect over the other, if they had to make a choice? 

If anything then Krea deciding to protect someone he deems weaker, because he knows Trias is more than capable of looking after herself. Would trust her to understand this

29. If one died, how would the other respond? What would happen to them afterwards? 

Krea would have lost a friend and he’d be sad, angry, seek justice as he would for anyone else. He did die for a moment, and Trias would have lost a big inhibitor if he had stayed dead

30. How far would each person follow the other? Would they trust them enough to commit crime because the other asked them to?

Krea won’t commit crimes on her behalf, in fact he kinda tries to keep people from doing crimes. There is not much he would do for her without wanting to know every single detail of the plan.

31. If one wronged the other badly, would the other forgive them easily? 

I don’t think either would forgive easily if it was something that genuinely hurt the other and broke the trust. They’re close, but some things they want to keep secret and make it clear they want to keep secret so digging into those would be bad. It’d take a while to get the trust back.

[artificialqueens]

Not Nineteen Forever (12) (Branjie/Scyvie/Ninex)- Ortega

a/n: hey friends! here’s chapter 12 of Not Nineteen Forever, i’m sorry it’s so late but i want to thank everyone who waited patiently and was so polite and encouraging while waiting. it really made me smile! remember i always love and am so grateful for sweet comments either on AQ, through reblog, or on my blog, so keep them coming bc they motivate me no end!! hope u all enjoy this chapter (p.s. finally accepted the ninex in this fic is not in any way background any more xo) xxxxxxx

trigger warning: alcohol n naughty texts xo

please note: this fic contains young adults often behaving in irresponsible/unadvisable ways with regards to alcohol, drugs and sex. if you are someone who feels as if they could be heavily influenced by fic and incorporate what happens in the plot into ur own life, pls steer clear!

summary: Brooke, Yvie and Nina are three flatmates who forged a friendship in their first year of university and picked up some other waifs and strays along the way. Now in their final year, there are feelings that need to be unravelled and confessions to be made whilst navigating drunk nights, hungover mornings, takeaways, group chats, library meetups, cafe gossiping, and the small matter of getting a degree.

last chapter: Monet and Nina continued to be adorable, Yvie and Scarlet continued to be cute, but Brooke wasn’t sure if she wanted the same for her and Vanessa.

this chapter: there’s library woes, a flat party, a lilac-haired, tattooed bombshell, and Yvie confides in Scarlet.

***

Scarlet let a long puff of air out of her cheeks and blinked at her laptop, bored. She’d been so eager for Uni to start back again, so excited to get back to the city and see her friends that she slightly forgot about the whole academic aspect of everything. Lectures had started that week and in between trying to force four different modules’ worth of information into her head she had caught up with Vanjie, chatting before, after and in between lectures when they could. It was interesting, Scarlet thought. Before Christmas she could never get her to shut up about Brooke and how things were going with her but ever since the holidays it seemed as if Brooke was a subject to be avoided. Scarlet knew something must have changed but she didn’t want to push Vanjie for information if she wasn’t ready to share it. They still seemed to be together, anyway, even if things seemed a little strained.

At least she could say that wasn’t the case for her and Yvie. After many long evening Skype sessions during the holidays, the pair of them had decided that they couldn’t bear to be apart a moment longer and so Scarlet had taken the six hour train to go and stay with her girlfriend at her family home for a few days. She had been a bag of nerves at the thought of meeting Yvie’s family, but her Mum had been lovely (and seemingly just relieved that her daughter had settled down), her Dad had been welcoming, if a little quiet (“He’s under strict instructions not to speak because every time he opens his mouth he embarrasses me”), and the brothers and sisters that were still at home and not out somewhere or back to uni themselves were kind and friendly. In the three days they spent together, Scarlet and Yvie went for cold, crisp walks along the beach, curled up on Yvie’s old battered leather sofa the family had had since she was small and watched Disney films, gone ice skating, and looked out over Yvie’s city on a rickety ferris wheel that had looked as if it would take one good sneeze to knock it down.

But all that movie-screen romance was behind her now, as the most romantic Scarlet had been with Yvie in the week since they’d been back at uni was a Tesco Finest £10 meal deal cooked in Yvie’s flat and then watched in front of the TV as a perfect accompaniment to Coronation Street. They were both busy and waiting for their academic life to slow down a little again. The same could be said for their whole friendship group, really. The whole gang hadn’t done anything all together since their Christmas dinner, and Scarlet was itching for a night out where she could get absolutely off her face and forget that she was working towards the degree that would define the rest of her life. Sighing again and feeling the words on her laptop merge into a big blur, Scarlet looked up at the big clock on the wall. Five o'clock. She turned to Akeria who was sat at the desk beside her. She and Silky had come to join her mid-study, the latter having been dragged into the library by her flatmate because she still hadn’t handed in an essay that had been due since before Christmas and Akeria was quite frankly concerned.

“Akeria,” Scarlet whispered, the other girl quickly finishing a sentence she was working on, turning away from her laptop towards Scarlet and pushing her reading glasses up the bridge of her nose. “I want a night out. This is shit.”

“This is what we signed up for, baby,” Akeria gave a small laugh and shrugged, turning back to her laptop. Akeria’s dissertation wasn’t due until May but she had already started writing it, which struck the fear of God into the majority of their friendship group and made them all feel like slackers. “This is uni. This is our fuckin’ degree, girl.”

“You’re really making me feel better,” Scarlet rolled her eyes, Akeria giving another laugh under her breath.

“Hey,” Silky said from her position at the desk across from them, her voice entirely at speaking-pitch and causing a few heads to turn their way. “What’re you hoes talkin’ about? I want in.”

“We’re bitching about you,” Akeria deadpanned, tapping away at her keyboard.

“Fuck off, Kiki.”

“I want a night out,” Scarlet hissed over to her as quietly as she could. “But Little Miss Law Degree wants to stay in the library from dusk til dawn every evening until she graduates.”

Scarlet’s face lit up as Silky bellowed a laugh so loud it caused the girl beside her to put a set of earphones in. Looking at Akeria and hoping she hadn’t been offended, she was relieved to see the other girl giving her a wry smile.

“This bitch can be so savage when she wants to be, Jesus. Ouch. No, I’m just sayin’! This was what we chose to do, so quit complaining,” Akeria rolled her eyes, leaned back in her chair and stretched. “That being said…I do think I’ve earned a night out.”

“Well me fuckin’ too, bitch!” Silky exclaimed incredulously, Scarlet laughing in spite of herself.

“How much have you written, Silk?” she asked, the girl opposite looking down at her laptop, clicking a few times, then looking back up to the girls in front of her.

“You know what…it don’t matter how many words I’ve done, it’s the level of mental energy I have needed to use in order to-”

“Silky, how many words,” Akeria demanded, fixing her with a stare that looked as if it could slice her in half.

“Ninety-four.”

“Jesus Christ on a crystal meth binge,” Akeria sighed, Scarlet letting out a splutter beside her. Silky looked at them both pleadingly.

“Hey, now don’t make me feel bad! We only been in here-”

“An hour and a quarter,” Akeria stared at her.

Silky threw her hands up. “Well I been doing readings an’ shit! Do you know how hard it is to get any articles that have the exact quote ‘Boris Johnston is a piece of dog shit’? Fuckin’ hard!”

“Why the hell are you looking for that?” Akeria blurted out, unable to keep herself from laughing. Scarlet was laughing so hard she thought she would pass out.

“Because, bitch! I want to use that exact wording in my essay but I need some academic shit to back me up.”

“Fuck me.”

“To be fair, that is the worst,” Scarlet shrugged, not wanting Silky to feel too demoralised. “Searching for three hours to find one reference that can back up one of your points. Like, why can’t you just make the point because you want to? You know? Why is your opinion only valid if it’s been previously thought up by a white man in a suit?"

"Very profound,” Silky nodded emphatically. “Anyway, this bitch needs to get her drink on. I’m going to ask the girls."

As she watched Silky pick up her phone, Scarlet was reminded to check her own. She’d deliberately sat on it and put it on flight mode in an attempt to force herself to do work. Now, she felt as if she could excuse a small break. Turning off flight mode, she watched as a small flood of notifications came through. There had been fifteen new group chat messages, Nina had tagged them all in a meme, and she had two messages from Yvie. She checked the latter first, wondering if she would ever get tired of the feeling of her heart soaring like a balloon every time she saw, heard or spoke Yvie’s name.

Y: if i told u i was considering buying a set of faux-leather underwear would that be weird or a turn-on

Y: also that lasagne is even better on the second day u need to have some of it when ur round

S: Sorry this took me so long!!!!!! I turned my phone on flight mode in an attempt to get some work done

S: No such luck

S: Leather look underwear is a yes from me but i’m inclined to ask for pics first xoxoxoxoxo

S: Also yes i want lasagne

S: That’s not a euphemism btw i actually really do want some lasagne

Y: 😈

As Scarlet gave a soft laugh to herself, she checked what had been going on on the group chat since she’d been studying. She wondered what exciting plans could have been made, or what drama could have happened, or if anyone had any exciting or interesting news.

Okay Then: oh my god

Kim Kardashian-West: ??????

Okay Then: has anyone seen the state of Simon Cowell’s face

Scarlet gave a colossal roll of her eyes. She should have known that, at times, the groupchat could become one massive shitpost.

Kim Kardashian-West: No??? What’s he done to it?? Has he been in a crash?

Okay Then: he might as fucking well have been

What followed was a picture of what seemed to be a man whose face had been partially melted with a blowtorch, until Scarlet looked closer and realised that it was indeed the TV talent show judge.

mose: Jesus Fucking Christ what’s he done to himself

Scarlet’s bitch: that’s frightening

Okay Then: RIGHT???

Scarlet’s bitch: that’s what i see in the corner of my room when i have sleep paralysis

Kim Kardashian-West: That is TRULY the stuff of nightmares!!!!

Brooke’s Ford Transit Vanjie: Fucking hell Plastique don’t fucking frighten us like that!!!

mose: He must surely see that he looks like shit? Like how could you not?

Okay Then: how can he see anything when his eyebrows are now entirely obscuring his eyes

Kim Kardashian-West: I am actually quite frightened guys

At this point, Scarlet caught up to the current conversation.

large incongruous silkworm spiced praline: AS TERRIFYING AS SIMON COWELL’S FACE IS

large incongruous silkworm spiced praline: CAN WE TALK BUSINESS FOR A SECOND?

Kim Kardashian-West: Of course!

mose: I’m all business

Brooke’s Ford Transit Vanjie: Sure you are baby xxxxxxx

Scarlet’s Bitch: that is fucking vile keep that shit off the groupchat u big gays

large incongruous silkworm spiced praline: YA FAV BITCHES ARE IN THE LIBRARY AND WE ARE GAGGING FOR A NIGHT OUT

large incongruous silkworm spiced praline: WE AIN’T HAD ONE IN AGES

Okay Then: yaaaaaaaaaas bitches let’s do it

Okay Then: thursday night fever

Kim Kardashian-West: Well Monet invited me to this flat party she’s hosting tonight

Kim Kardashian-West: I could ask her if you guys could come too?

Brooke’s Ford Transit Vanjie: Omg yes I’m down!

large incongruous silkworm spiced praline: YES BITCH FLAT PARTY!!!!

large incongruous silkworm spiced praline: AND IF SHE SAYS NO JUST SAY SHE AIN’T GETTIN ANY PUSS FOR THE FORESEEABLE FUTURE

Kim Kardashian-West: SILKY!!!!!!!! THAT IS DISGUSTING!!!

Yvie’s Bitch: We were all thinking it xoxo

Brooke’s Ford Transit Vanjie: AHAHAHAHAHA SILK

Okay Then: YES Scarlet

Kim Kardashian-West: You’re all horrible. And uninvited.

mose: Ninaaaaaa

Okay Then: Nina pls

Scarlet’s Bitch: fuck i’m not even sure i can do tonight ladies

large incongruous silkworm spiced praline: YVIE DONT YOU DARE

Scarlet’s Bitch: i’ve got a 9am tomorrow and i want to get that first u know

mose: Yvieeee the last time we were all together was literally over a month ago

Scarlet pouted to herself, disappointed at the thought of Yvie being the only one not out. Suddenly, an idea began to form in her head. Biting back a smile, she took to her chat with Yvie.

S: Yvieeeee

Y: Scarleeeeet

S: Please come to the flat party :(((((((

S: I’ll do anything you want

Y: anything i want?

S: Yesssss

Y: that sounds like a challenge princess

Scarlet crossed her legs and felt herself squeezing her thighs together. Looking around at the rows of silent people, she turned her phone brightness down to make extra sure nobody could see her messages, just in case the conversation turned the way Scarlet thought it was about to.

S: Well it depends on what you want me to do x

Y: wellllll

Y: i’ve been wondering if u can take a strap like a good girl

Scarlet felt briefly as if she’d been shocked by a defibrillator. Yvie always seemed to go from 0 to 100 real fucking quick, and Scarlet couldn’t help but love it.

S: You know I could baby

Y: i know you could, you’re such a good girl

Y: so how about if i come to this party i get to watch u bounce on my dick until u cum all over it

Scarlet could feel her face growing red. She and Yvie had messaged like this before, when they had been at home and miles away from each other and alone and very much not-in-a-public-place, but this was so fucking different.

S: Christ Yves I’m in the library!!!!

Y: shut up u started all this!!

S: Yeah I kinda did

Y: deliberately getting me to tell u what i want to do to u later when ur sitting in public in a fucking silent building

Y: jesus fucking christ Scarlet that’s so hot

Scarlet felt an urgent pulse of heat between her legs and she squirmed in her seat.

S: Where are you just now?

Y: i’m in bed

Y: touching myself at the thought of u sitting absolutely soaking wet and being able to do fuck all about it

S: So you’re coming to the party baby?

Y: how about

Y: if u can get to the flat before i cum i’ll fuck u into the mattress and i’ll come to this party or whatever

Scarlet nearly jammed her fingers in her laptop in her haste to get it shut, wrenched her charger out of its socket so hard it almost broke, and muttered a near-breathless goodbye to a confused Akeria and Silky all in the space of about twenty seconds as she struggled into her coat and sped out into the stairwell.

Five hours later Scarlet had managed to fit a lot in. She’d hurried round to Yvie’s to find her in bed in the black lace underwear she knew drove Scarlet crazy, and they’d fucked twice (fast, rough and passionate then sweet, tender and gentle) before Scarlet had reluctantly dragged herself out of Yvie’s bed to head back to her own flat and get ready for the party. Nobody seemed to know what the dress code was, least of all Nina who had sent about nine different outfit options to the group chat for opinions, so Scarlet settled on a tight black bandage dress that stopped at her calves, with trainers to dress it down a bit. She’d hurriedly munched down a bowl of pasta a la whatever-was-left-in-the-fridge, then set off across town to meet the girls at the edge of the park, where they had decided they would all meet then walk together to Monet’s flat.

Scarlet heard her friends before she saw them, Vanjie’s distinctive laugh ricocheting off trees and mixing with Yvie’s Bond-villan one letting Scarlet know she was heading in the right direction. Finally reaching the group, Scarlet gave them all a hug in turn and took in each of their outfits. It was still icy and cold, so most of them had opted for trainers over heels- save for Plastique, who always wore them for any night out and Vanjie, who was wearing chunky heeled boots. Much of their clothes clashed with the weather, though. Plastique and Akeria were in tight dresses, Brooke and Silky were in short skirts and tops. Vanjie had chosen some loose-fitting ripped denim jeans and a tiny bodysuit which left little to the imagination. Nina had gone for a light blue t-shirt dress and a chunky pair of trainers, her nerves palpable even in the group dynamic. Scarlet thought Yvie looked the best though in her burnt orange velvet skirt and tight black long-sleeved bodysuit, her unruly hair tamed and brushed into two huge bunches.

"You look nice, Nina!” Scarlet complimented her in an attempt to calm her down.

“Aww, Scarlet! Do I actually?” Nina smiled brightly, then cringed at herself. “Fuck! Why can’t I just take a fucking compliment like a goddamn normal person? I do this with Monet all the time!”

“Because you got a big-ass crush,” Silky shrugged. “It’s almost as big as Akeria’s ass. Not quite, though.”

“Shut up,” Akeria rolled her eyes and shoved her friend.

“Does it even count as a crush if you’re seeing the person in question?” Scarlet wondered out loud. Plastique shifted her weight from one foot to the other.

“Don’t know. Ask Brooke or Vanjie.”

The group exploded into laughter, something about it not quite meeting Brooke or Vanessa’s eyes. They were both standing close together, hands entwined, but Scarlet didn’t know. There seemed as if there was something off. Forced, even.

“Okay, let’s go, motherfuckers. I’m freezing my vagina off,” Vanjie said decisively, Nina moving first and making to lead the way.

“Right, a few things before we arrive,” Nina began speaking at a mile a minute before Scarlet could even compliment Yvie on her outfit. “Monet has somehow got it into her head that you guys are cool enough to be invited to this party. She doesn’t know the truth yet, so just try to act like a group of normal fucking human beings?”

“The truth? What the hell is that meant to mean?!” Brooke let out a laugh.

“That you’re all fucking weirdos! And she, for some reason, still likes me, so I am not having you all put that in jeopardy, capiche?” Nina snapped back, only half-joking.

“Jeez, thanks,” Akeria rolled her eyes, Nina instantly protesting.

“I’m joking! I’m joking. But not really. Like Silk, please try not to overdo it tonight?”

Silky raised her eyebrows and sucked her cheeks in. “I’m making no promises, girl.”

“Akeria, please don’t accidentally make out with anyone’s boyfriends?”

“Oh my God Nina! That happened ONCE!” Akeria cried out incredulously.

“And Vanjie, don’t-”

“Nina. We’re not going to embarrass you. Chill the fuck out,” Yvie rolled her eyes and squeezed the shoulder of the girl in front of her.

The girls all finally reached Monet’s old, red-brick building and her front door, and Nina pressed the buzzer nervously. There came a crackly screech of mayhem through the intercom which contained unintelligible speech, and then the girls were all quickly buzzed in. Scarlet looked to Yvie questioningly as she wondered if she’d heard any words, but she also appeared to be as clueless as she was. It didn’t seem to faze any of the other girls though, as Vanjie was already bounding up the stairs with Akeria as fast as her chunky heels could carry her. They didn’t have to walk far, as Monet’s flat was on the first floor. Vanjie moved to open the door first when it was suddenly wrenched open from the other side to reveal a tiny, skinny blonde girl with her hair curled and loose on her shoulders. Her pink dress was as tiny as she was, but regardless of her size she looked ready to fight.

“Who the fuck are you?” she addressed Akeria, barely acknowledging the others. “You here to sell us girl scout cookies, or an Avon catalogue, check our meter readings maybe?"

Just as Akeria looked as if she would instigate a full-scale fight, Nina poked her head out from behind Brooke’s tall frame. "Cracker, don’t be a dick!”

The girl’s face immediately relaxed into a wide, shameless smile. “Nina! Oh my God, you bitch, I never saw you! Come in, God!”

Akeria still bristling and Vanjie not too dissimilar, the girls all trooped into the flat which immediately struck Scarlet as something out of an American teen Netflix special. The hall was dark with the occasional string of fairy lights, and was packed full of people. Scarlet instinctively reached for Yvie’s hand in the crowd and got a squeeze back without even having to look at her. Nina and the girl, Cracker apparently, led them through to a huge bedroom which had obviously once been a living room but had been repurposed by a money-hungry landlord. The room was quieter but still had its fair share of people dotted about in amongst the Morrocan market wall-coverings, tiny elephant incense stick holders, and swathes of printed photos and posters that covered the walls like tiles. A huge bed sat to one side where Monet sat sprawled out with her shoes kicked off, chatting to a black girl with a huge afro that otherwise looked so identical to her Scarlet assumed they must be sisters. Cracker flung herself down on top of the mattress and joined them, gesturing vaguely to the girls.

“Neens!!” Monet suddenly squealed as she looked up, throwing her arms out as Nina launched herself half on the bed and half on top of her. Monet continued, muffled, as the rest of the girls awkwardly lingered. “I’m so happy you came, oh my God, this is so amazing!”

“I brought everyone too. Is that still okay? They can leave if not,” Nina instantly reeled off, Brooke bellowing out a laugh. Monet’s face lit up.

“Oh my God of course not! Brooke! Scarlet! Yvie!! Oh my God, come and hug me,” Monet beamed, her intoxication showing ever so slightly as Brooke graciously leaned down and hugged the other girl them got instantly pulled onto the bed. Monet gestured for everyone to come closer. “Guys! It’s so good to see you all, thanks so much for coming! There’s, like. Endless booze in the kitchen. Feel free to just drink us out of house and home.”

Silky’s face lit up and she immediately grabbed Akeria and Plastique, making to drag them through. “Vanj, you comin’?”

“Get me something? I'mma stay here with my girl,” Vanessa shouted back, giving a smile back to Brooke but finding the other girl looking down at her phone instead. Scarlet frowned involuntarily and then was suddenly distracted by a squeeze of her hand from Yvie (who still hadn’t let go).

“I’m going to go make sure Silky doesn’t give herself alcohol poisoning. You want me to bring you back a drink?” she offered, Scarlet unable to help the smile that spread across her face.

“You’re a sweetheart. Surprise me.”

“A pint glass of tequila it is,” Yvie deadpanned as she walked away, too quick for Scarlet’s hand that swatted at her in response. Scarlet tuned into the conversation that the girls were all having on the bed. It was big, but it was still a bed in a student flat, and so Brooke had her elbows resting on the mattress and her lower body on the floor and Scarlet had had to squeeze up to make room for Vanjie to sit beside her.

“She was guarding the place like fort fuckin’ knox,” Vanessa was saying, a playful side eye being cast to the blonde girl, who let out a laugh.

“You’re an animal,” Monet’s potential sister rolled her eyes. “A living guard dog. We should put a collar on you. One of those ones with spikes.”

“Nah. That’s only reserved for people who want to fuck me. Do you want to fuck me, Bob?�� the girl asked easily, before taking a swig of the cider bottle she was holding. Monet hooted a laugh and the other girl didn’t even break her expression.

“I wouldn’t eat your pussy if it was made of chocolate fuckin’ fudge cake. Get the fuck out,” she retorted, Nina looking up at them all from her position on Monet’s tummy.

“Is that not that Lana Del Ray lyric? My pussy tastes like chocolate fudge cake…”

Scarlet let out a laugh that was more like a scream, the others on the bed doing much the same thing. Monet wiped her eyes and took in a deep breath.

“Oh my God, okay. For those of you that haven’t met before- this is Cracker and Bob. Two out of the three girls I have the blessing or curse of living with, I haven’t figured out yet,” she gestured to the two girls in turn and then turned to Scarlet. “And this is Scarlet, Vanjie and Brooke Lynn. They’re Nina’s friends, so they’re obviously amazing.”

“Nina could throw up on your bed and you’d say it was amazing,” Cracker looked pointedly at Monet. Monet shrugged and threw her arms around Nina.

“And what?"

"Nice to meet you guys. Are you two sisters?” Scarlet asked, curiosity getting the better of her as she pointed between Bob and Monet. Monet laughed and Bob rolled her eyes.

“Are you saying that all black people look the same?” Bob asked her with a piercing stare, Scarlet’s entire stomach dropping at the thought of having offended her.

“Oh my God, no! No no no, I just thought-”

“She’s kidding, Scarlet. Being a dick, as usual,” Monet cut off Scarlet’s frantic protests and immediately calming her down. “No, we’re not related. We just look spookily alike.”

“You fuckin’ wish you looked even a tenth as good as me. Hey, where the fuck is Monique?” Bob asked suddenly, both Cracker and Monet shrugging.

“Flatmate number four,” Monet quickly cut in to explain.

“Away making some chaotic cocktail, probably,” Cracker shrugged. Bob gave another roll of her eyes, then turned and smiled at Brooke, Scarlet and Vanessa.

“Nice to meet you anyway. Are you all flatmates too?” Bob asked politely, ignoring the position of the slit on her long skirt as she crossed her legs.

“Not us three exactly. Brooke lives with Nina and Yvie, that’s my girlfriend,” Scarlet explained, her stomach full of fizzy fireworks at being able to say that for real. “Vanj lives with Silky and Akeria over on Antigua Road.”

“They’re the best hoes in the world. They’re through in the other room getting drunk, but you’d love them,” Vanjie cut in. Cracker let out a laugh.

“Oh yeah, shit. Sorry I was so mean to you.”

Vanessa smiled easily, the free alcohol that the flatmates were providing clearly making up for any perceived slight. “Don’ worry about it, girl. We’d probably do the same if some hoes we didn’t know turned up at our party.”

“What about you, Scarlet?” Bob asked politely, instantly seeming far less intimidating.

“I’m over on the South Side. Kinda far out. I found this girl on SpareRooms to live with, but she’s a bit of a dick,” Scarlet explained awkwardly. Cracker leaned in, her eyes shining excitedly.

“What’s her name?”

“Fuck, I don’t want to say in case any of you are friends with her!” Scarlet laughed, but no protestations came. She lowered her voice as she continued. “It’s Ra'Jah? Ra'Jah O'Hara?”

“Oh, FUCK!” Bob cried out, holding onto Cracker for support as she almost fell off the bed. “I know who that is! She’s in my Econ tutorials! Oh my God, she’s an actual fucking moron. I had a group project with her once and she did literally nothing but talk about drugs and bitch about people on our course.”

As Scarlet was about to launch into how horrifically messy a flatmate she was, Yvie came back from the kitchen with two bottles of beer and a tall black girl with a shock of lilac hair swept up into a ponytail and a matching straight fringe. She was wearing a black pair of jeans and a tiny black cropped t shirt which showed off her many tattoos, and in her hand looked to be an elaborate mojito-style concoction.

“I made a friend!” she cried, before slumping herself down beside Vanjie, Scarlet growing ever more squashed up against the bedpost.

“Oh, the wanderer returns,” Cracker deadpanned. “What did you make?”

“Margarita mojito,” the girl shrugged, sipping her drink to punctuate her sentence. “It’s basically a mojito with a big-ass shot of tequila in it. Guys, this is Yvie! She’s Nina’s friend!”

“Oh, you’re Scarlet’s girlfriend!” Bob smiled at her in recognition, Yvie clambering into a tiny space on the middle of the bed, handing one of the beers to Scarlet, and casting her a look through narrowed eyes.

“What have you been saying about me, bitch?” Yvie smiled playfully, the look she was fixing her causing a sudden flash of heat to strike between Scarlet’s legs.

“All good things, baby,” Scarlet smiled innocently, Yvie relaxing and leaning back against Scarlet’s chest.

“This is Bob and Cracker. They’re my other flatmates. You’ve already met Monique, then?” Monet introduced the girls to Yvie.

“Yeah, we bonded over watching Akeria flirt with people. The bitch is a fucking mastermind. She walked into the kitchen and had a guy talking to her within, like, one minute.”

“Introduce me, introduce me!” Monique bounced on the mattress excitedly. Vanjie came dangerously close to falling off the bed and Monique quickly noticed, reaching a hand out to her and pulling her up with it. “Shit, sorry girl!”

Scarlet watched as Vanessa swept some hair out of her face and cast a quick appreciative glance to Monique’s toned arm. “Holy mother of Jesus, I gotta start goin’ to the gym.”

Monique let out a bark of a laugh. Cracker caught her other arm and held it steady, the tequila/rum combo threatening to fly out of its glass.

“Brooke, Scarlet and Vanjie, meet Monique.

Monique, this is Brooke, Scarlet and Vanjie,” Cracker pointed to each of them in turn, finishing with Vanjie who still seemed to be casting her eyes over Monique.

“Well, Vanessa. But these girls call me Vanjie. Or Vanj. You choose, really,” Vanjie explained to Monique, the girl’s ponytail swishing as she cocked her head.

“You ever get called baby?” she asked, feigning innocence. Scarlet couldn’t help her eyes shooting wide and her brain almost went into meltdown trying to register everyone’s expressions at once. Vanjie was laughing, but her face had flushed pink, clearly flattered. Cracker was screeching a laugh, Bob looked long-suffering. Nina and Monet were looking at each other urgently, and Brooke was properly looking at Vanessa with interest for the first time since they all sat down on the bed. Scarlet couldn’t see Yvie’s face, but she’d felt her tense up, and she couldn’t blame her.

“Yeah. By Brooke Lynn over there,” Vanessa finally said through her laughter, Monique not seeming fazed as she cast a glance to Brooke, who was smiling patiently but inwardly seething if the red tips of her ears were anything to go by.

“Oh, sorry girl! I didn’t know she was taken,” Monique laughed pleasantly.

“Yeah, we’re a thing,” Brooke opened her mouth, breaking her silence. Vanessa was smiling at her from across the bed, and Brooke met her eyes and smiled back.

“A thing?” Monique let out a short laugh, spilling a little of her drink. “A thing is, like, a noun. Not a relationship.”

“Technically a girlfriend is a noun too. Thing, place, person,” Nina piped up, presumably in an attempt to diffuse the increasingly awkward vibe.

“Are you a primary teacher, Nina?!” Cracker asked, clutching her chest in faux-surprise. Nina sighed.

“If I could reach a pillow, I’d thump you."

"Monet, you hearing this? Your girlfriend is practically chatting me up,” Cracker laughed, then stopped suddenly as her face became a mix of horrified and regretful, Bob giving her a not-so-subtle thump on the arm. In lieu of gauging Monet and Nina’s facial expressions, Scarlet whispered her thoughts to Yvie.

“When the hell are they actually going to become official? It’s been ages!” she hissed into her ear, Yvie craning her head round to reply.

“Nina would have to be on a cocktail mixer of cocaine, Es and alcohol to gain even half the confidence it would take her to ask Monet, so she’s waiting on Monet to do it for her. The thing is, I think Monet’s not as confident as we all like to think either. Maybe sometimes Nina’s panic can present itself as disinterest.”

“So Monet’s maybe waiting until she knows where she stands with her?” Scarlet nodded in realisation.

Yvie sipped her drink and took Scarlet’s hand, tracing round her fingers absent-mindedly. “I think so. I mean, we all know Nina’s absolutely ass-over-tit in love with her because we’re her friends, but she’s not going to let that show to Monet until she’s ready.”

Scarlet watched as Yvie played with a large turquoise ring on her finger. Her brow was furrowed as she thought about the situation, and Scarlet’s heart felt like an enormous water balloon- incredibly fragile and full and feeling as if it was about to burst. She thought back to Yvie’s words on Christmas dinner night, the ones she hadn’t been able to stop thinking about since she’d said them.

Suddenly, she was pulled out of her thoughts by a screech from Vanjie, who was looking at Monique with enrapture as she told a story. Admittedly, most of the other girls were looking at her too, but Scarlet didn’t miss the sparkle in Vanjie’s eyes as she listened.

“And there it was, I swear by almighty God, the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit…a whole baggie of weed, in the bin, covered in Cracker’s vomit.”

It was an odd moment for Scarlet to tune into the story but judging by the roar the girls on the bed gave, it seemed to be over. Vanjie had doubled over laughing and was clinging to Monique’s arm for support, the girl in question smiling down at her as if her reaction was the only one that mattered. Scarlet frowned and leaned into Yvie once more.

“Hey. What the hell is the deal with Brooke and Vanjie?” she whispered, making sure to keep her voice extra low. She instantly felt Yvie tense up in her lap.

“What do you mean? They seem fine to me?” Yvie murmured back. Luckily for Scarlet, she knew that Yvie lied so rarely that it was easy to spot when she was telling one.

“You know something. What is it?” Scarlet hissed urgently in Yvie’s ear. Hearing her give a big sigh, Yvie shifted and then rose on the bed.

“Me and Scarlet are just getting another drink, save our seats,” Yvie announced to the circle, receiving a cheer from Nina.

“Enjoy your sex!” she cried after them, and Scarlet, confused, simply followed Yvie to another room. The hall was quieter now, but the same could not be said of the kitchen, where as they walked in they saw Silky, Akeria and Plastique ringleading a game of The Good, The Bad and The Ugly. Ignoring their friends, Yvie turned to Scarlet urgently, concern covering her face.

“Okay, Brooke told me this in confidence but you’re my girlfriend so I kind of can’t really keep anything from you, right?” she began, Scarlet nodding quickly and desperate to hear what Yvie knew. “But you CAN’T tell anyone about this, babe. Honestly, it needs to stay between us. Do you promise?”

“I promise,” Scarlet said instantly, her mind in overdrive. Yvie pulled a pained face for a moment, seemingly incredibly conflicted, and then looked to the floor.

“Brooke is having second thoughts about being with Vanjie.”

Scarlet’s face dropped. “What?!”

“Brooke told me that she felt everything was getting too intense, and that Vanj wanted more than Brooke felt she could give her. She’s sticking it out to see if it’s just a blip, but…yeah. Now you know why they’ve both been so weird,” Yvie explained, biting her lip and looking at Scarlet with concern.

Scarlet didn’t know what to think. It all made so much sense, the oddly distant vibes between them both, the strained atmosphere, Vanjie flirting with Monique. Suddenly, a thought occurred to Scarlet. “Does Vanessa know?”

Yvie rolled her eyes. “Yes absolutely, Scarlet, Vanjie is very happy staying with someone who isn’t even sure if she wants things to go further with her, Brooke’s told her everything!"

Scarlet’s mind seemed to fuse. "She needs to know.”

Yvie’s expression dropped. “Oh my fucking Christ, you literally just promised not to tell anyone.”

“Well I didn’t know what it was you were going to tell me! I mean shit, Yvie, imagine that was me and you and I was having second thoughts! Would you want to be kept in the dark?”

Yvie bit her lip and looked to the floor. Scarlet gave a snort. “Exactly, bitch. I’m going to go find her right now-”

“Scarlet, please,” Yvie stopped her quickly, reaching out and grabbing her hand. “Brooke would be fuckin’ raging at me. I told you this shit in confidence. I know it’s hard because you’re close with Vanjie, but can you please…I mean hold off at least. If she asks you about it then, fine. You can tell her. But don’t run through there just now.”

Scarlet’s head felt as if it was a mess. She tapped her foot against the linoleum floor. “Who’s she told?”

“Just me,” Yvie said sincerely, looking into Scarlet’s eyes. “Nina doesn’t know. It’s just us.”

Scarlet rolled her eyes. “Fine. But I’m pinning all the fucking blame on you if she finds out I know, you know that?”

Yvie nodded understandingly. Scarlet let out a big sigh. The silence between them hung heavy in the air, at odds with the party happening around them. Suddenly, Plastique tottered into their line of vision, her eyes glazed and drunk.

“Oh my God guys! I haven’t seen you like all night! Selfie!!” she cried, sticking her phone in the air. Scarlet felt herself smile weakly but luckily the photo seemed to be too blurry for anyone to notice. Plastique immediately walked off again.

“Okay bye, nice seeing you,” Yvie deadpanned after her. Scarlet pressed her lips together to stop a laugh escaping them. Yvie caught her eye and snorted, and Scarlet couldn’t help but let out the laugh she’d been holding in. The tension had been diffused by a drunk Plastique, and Scarlet was relieved. She ran her hand down Yvie’s arm and squeezed her hand.

“I’m sorry.”

“No, I’m sorry. I should’ve just kept the fucking secret,” Yvie sighed, lacing her fingers through Scarlet’s own. She smiled at Scarlet, showing the little gap in her teeth, and Scarlet felt her heart jump. “Hey, I kind of want to go get chips, cheese and gravy and then head back to the flat and watch the Scooby Doo movie. You down?”

Scarlet smiled. She was kind of over the party. She’d been so eager for a night out, but all she wanted right now was a night in with her girlfriend. “Sounds amazing. Let’s go.”

The two headed back through to the bedroom to grab their jackets and say goodbye to the rest of the girls. Notably absent from the room were Brooke and Vanessa, and Scarlet was about to mention this to Yvie when they walked back out into the hall and spotted a tall, blonde girl and a small brunette kissing furiously in a darker, quieter corner. As Yvie opened the front door, she turned to Scarlet.

“I feel like they won’t be far behind us. Brooke must have sorted her shit out, then.”

As Scarlet grabbed one last look at the two girls against the wall, she desperately hoped Yvie was right.

[hcngsang]

   hello   beautiful   people,   it’s   me,   kiki,   coming   to   you   with   an   unfinished   character   and   messy   intro   !   i’m   twenty   one   yrs   old   uhhh   i’m   from   the   gmt   timezone   and   currently   dying   bc   of   school   ! anyways   this   is   jaesun,   a   human   who   despises   androids   or   well   at   least   the   android   who   basically   stole   his   life   kind   of   jlksdfjlskdj   !   he’s   annoying   ,   doesn’t   rlly   care   much   about   the   feelings   of   others   and   wishes   he   was   born   in   the   90s   or   something   like   that....  

 omg   also   i’ve   never   played   the   game   before   and   i   checked   some   wikias   n   vid   of   it   and   it   looked   so   cool   that   i   went   to   a   game   store   and   saw   it   was   like   20   euros   !!   but   i   couldnt   buy   it   yet   and   when   i   looked   on   the   site   just   now   it   was   back   to   65   euros   ...............   im   so   stupid   :c   but   okay   carrying   on   JFDSLKJFD   underneath   is   some   more   info   about   him   so   please   take   a   lookie   and   give   a   heart   pls   if   u   wanna   plot   !!

tw: uhhh none that are very heavy, there’s a mentioned death but nothing too graphic

CHOI   JAESUN.       don’t   sit   on   my   dick   if   you’re   afraid   of   heights   !        

000.   QUICK   STATS.

NAME:   choi   jaesun

AGE:   twenty   three

DATE OF BIRTH:   11   march   2026

GENDER:   male

NATIONALITY:   japanese... right fdjskl? 

OCCUPATION:   currently   unemployed

001.    BACKSTORY.

he’s   one   half   of   a   pair   or   well,   he   was   one   half   of   a   pair.   jaesun   lost   his   twin   sister   to   a   sudden   heart   attack,   something   that   to   this   day   still   doesn’t   make   sense   to   him   because   she   was   so   healthy   and   everything   good   but   it   only   shows   that   death   doesn’t   discriminate.   it   wasn’t   until   two   years   after   her   death   that   his   mom   bought   someone   new   into   their   house,   an   android   to   be   exact   one   that   looked   eerily   similar   to   his   dead   twin.

jaesun   had   always   been   fascinated   by   androids   and   how   they   worked   so   he   was   very   excited   to   witness   with   his   two   eyes   what   this   android   could   do.   he   wasn’t   bothered   by   the   appearance   in   the   slightest,   if   anything,   it   somehow   calmed   him.   because   it   looked   almost   identical   to   his   sister   jisun.   her   death   certainly   affected   him   a   lot,   because   she   was   not   only   his   sister   but   also   his   best   friend.   

at   first   jaesun   loved   to   have   the   android   around,   someone   who   was   willing   to   do   chores   around   the   house   and   who   would   cook   but   when   he   noticed   his   mother   paying   more   and   more   attention   to   the   android   than   him   he   started   to   despise   the   android.  

now,   he   was   never   the   favorite   child   that   much   he   knew   when   jisun   was   still   alive.   but   there   was   something   hurtful   about   his   mother   favoring   a   fucking   android   more   than   her   only   child.

so   not   only   he   felt   like   he   was   less   than   the   android,   he   and   his   mom   started   to   fight   more   with   his   mom   blaming   his   lazy   ass   for   not   doing   shit   in   the   house   before   and   after   jisun’s   death   and   with   jaesun   blaming   her   for   always   comparing   him   to   his   sister   and   taking   better   care   of   the   android   more   than   her   own   son.

002.    PRESENT.

WELL   he   moved   out   of  the   house   and   it   was   very   dramatic   and   he   got   into   a   huge   fight   right,   said   “   i   don’t   ever   wanna   see   ur   face   ever   again   !   ”   but   probably   saw   his   mom   a   week   later   when   he   entered   the   apartment   building.........   since   they   uhhh   all   live   in   the   same   building   i   guess

anyway   yeah   the   experience   really   gave   him   a   bad   outlook   on   androids,   especially   when   he   was   also   laid   off   of   work   soon   after   bc   they   were   gonna   hire   androids   instead   bc   the   wages   were   a   lot   cheaper   ...   uhhhh   okay

so   now   he’s   just   breezing   through   life   with   no   real   purpose   and   spends   most   of   his   time   in   rapture

003.    PERSONALITY.

basically,   he   thinks   he’s   better   than   everyone   else   and   isn’t   afraid   to   show  it   ?   i   wouldn’t   say   he’s   mean   mean   but   he’s   not   kind   either   ??   for   the   most   part   he   just   doesn’t   know   why   you,   a   zero,   is   talking   to   him,   a   10.   lmao   !   he’s   pretty   indifferent   if   he   hurts   people   bc   he   cares   about   him   and   him   only   !   basically,   he’s   like   ...   confident   to   the   point   where   he’s   conceited,   bc   he   knows   he’s   hot   shit   jsdflkdfj  

oh   yeah,   so,   negative   traits:   conceited,   candid positive   traits:    audacious,   independent

basically,   my   whole   damn   inspo   was   singularity   and   watching   20   fancams   of   singularity

004.   EXTRAS.

jesus   i   spent   way   too   much   time   thinking   about   how   he   looks   like...   ugh..   why   does   tae   have   so   many   gr8   looks....   okay..   well   hair   ?   black   ?   i   think   during   fake   love   era   ???   omg   im   going   through   it..   uhhh   what   do   i   add   more,   oh   yeah   !   buys   expensive   black   /   white   basic   shirts   because   he   can   n   he   likes   the   way   he   looks   like   a   normal   non-rich   person   when   he   wears   an   overpriced   270k   yen (   ??   is   there   a   diff   currency   )   black   shirt   lol   but   also   wears   dress   shirts   and   trousers   and   nice   shoes   n   a   tie   just   because   he   wants   everyone   to   now   that   he   is   a  god   amongst   all   of   these   humans   n   androids  

can’t   really....   keep   relationships   and   is   more   into   casual   hookups   /   fwbs   etc   so   he   usually   yeets   the   fuck   out   when   someone   catches   feelings   for   him   (   or   if   he   caught   feelings   for   someone   else   omg   rip..   )

Choi   Jaesun   is   Bad   at   Feelings

005.    WANTED PLOTS.

all   of   these   are   open   for   further   plotting   of   course   !!

a   best   friend   who   put   up   with   his   shit    &   feed   his   ego  !!   has   to   be...   human...   

childhood   friends   someone   who   prolly   still   has   embarrassing   pics   of   him

someone   he   dislikes   /   can’t   stand   

unlikely   friend   /   polar   opposites

an   android   that   he   could   consider   a   friend   maybe   ?

fwbs   /   casual   hook   ups

someone   who   he   leads   on   owo

bad   influence   on   someone

anything   angsty   of   COURSE !!!!

i   will   maybe   make   a   proper   connection   page   butdfjsodklsjf   these   r   a   few   i’d   have   and   ofc   i’m   open   to   anything   else   !

[nataliademarquis]

hshqtask 005: get to know the mun !

001. name / age / pronouns

ashley, 17, she/her

002. which character(s) do you play?

natalia de marquis, lily liu, leo de bragança 

003. nationality / ethnicity / timezone

american, vietnamese (a little chinese too, it’s in there somewhere apparently), cst

004. tell us a bit about your  ( home / current country / city / etc. your pick)

you know the drake in my feelings music video ?? yeahhh that’s where i’m from. born and raised. i went to a new years party in the house that “kiki” lives in. also, my friend’s sister was an extra in one of the clubbing scenes and when drake came back to nola to perform he invited her to his afterparty and apparently he’s really weird. anyways on to new orleans

my favorite thing about it is it’s history/architecture/culture actually. i can prob talk about it for ages. the architecture is v interesting bc it’s french buildings but a lot of spanish influence. (there was a fire when it was under spanish rule so they rebuilt off the french let me stop before i get to the louisiana purchase) and the history of the city is really cool.

i can’t forget about the best part- mardi gras!!! well partying in general... very proud to say u can drink in public here. and there’s no such thing as last call bc u can serve alcohol 24 hrs technically. god bless us. even tho i wanna leave i have to say there is no place like new orleans

005.  favourite color / fruit / season

pink and (emerald) green, dragon fruit, summer

006. favourite books + writer whose writing style you admire the most

ummm i honestly never have time to read books anymore, i used to love reading tho. i really love the catcher in the rye, it’s a basic ass book i know but i really like the lessons and story it tells. 

007. what kinda music do you listen to + any fave bands / musicians

i literally listen to a little bit everything, mainly like pop rock, rap, and r&b... sometimes classical when i’m feeling it. my fave artists are like childish gambino, brockhampton, haim, jorja smith, kanye, travis scott.

008. what are you doing for a living / what are you studying?

i’m probably gonna go into biology/pre-med but i’m seriously considering changing to business (like entrepreneurship/marketing). idk yet i’ll see

009. what’s your dream occupation?

ideally i’d want to be kim kardashian- like just have random businesses and be super hot as my job. but for real, i want to be an anesthesiologist if i go the pre-med track. if i go business then i would want a business/idea of mine to be successful- or make a company and sell it for $$$

010. relationship status

siiinngggllleeee

011. coffee, tea or hot chocolate?

coffee

012. dream holiday destination?

i’d really like to go to japan... i’ve been to their airport but i want to actually visit

013. the thing you’re most proud about yourself

i love to help people. i went on a service trip to belize and built a house for a family and nothing made me happier- prob best and proudest moment of my life was handing over the keys.

014. tell us a bit about your family!

i have an older sister and a younger brother. i have a gazillion cousins but we have a close circle of like 15 of us and we’re super fun... we just reunited at a family member’s wedding the other day it was a grand old time

015. how long have you known your closest friend?

13 years and counting ;)

016. superpower you’d like to have?

teleportation. the amount of money i’d save 

017. celebrity you’d like to meet?

kim kardashian pls don’t judge me i love her

018. guilty pleasures

i’m addicted to starbucks and that’s why i never have money

019. pet peeves

idk i’m a pretty forgiving person- but i hate when people are rude to waitstaff like servers and stuff esp when it’s obvious they have no control on what’s happening

020. do you have any hobbies?

umm i play the violin. i like to go to the gym (most of the time) and i like makeup and painting.

021. where would you like to live in the future?

austin, texas. i don’t think i can ever leave the south or go away from the equator. i wasn’t cut out for winter PERIODT

022. tell us a story about a thing that recently happened to you! it can be a funny, scary, sad story, your pick!

so i went to this music festival and my friends and i are in the crowd of this random dj’s set. my friend spots this guy and his friends and she’s like “i just know he’s british we have to go talk to them.” so she drags us over and we strike up conversation. turns out they’re australian, and super cool. we danced with them and stuff and we’re asking about their accents and they made fun of ours... and i’m dancing with one in particular, and he gives me his number and tells me what hotel he’s staying in. and i was like ummmmm. then they asked us to meet them at another set but we never made it and we never bothered to hit them up again, so rip to my australian lover LOL.

umm and we met some italian soccer players last week (they play for some college team) after getting pizza and we went out with them to a bar the next day. what country will we hit next? guess in the comments below 

[bigbrothernetflix-st]

EPISODE THREE

“this was literally one of the worst decisions i've ever had to make so now i'm just kinda pissed off!” - nash

HOH: Nash UPSIDE DOWN: Joey & Saira NOMINEES: Brianna & Gina POV: Jacob FINAL NOMINEES: Emma & Gina EVICTED: Gina (11-1), Jake (WALK)

ARIA

https://youtu.be/SyHPQkbxxw8

JOEY

WATCH THIS AGE LIKE MILK:

I feel great!!!!! Nash winning means my ass aint going up, I gave her 2 tokens, and she gave me 1, and I feel fantastic heading into this week

SAIRA

i feel okay about nash being hoh, she wasn't my first choice but i don't think im in any danger of being nominated (hopefully haha) im not sure who i WOULD want to be nominated, i just know who i wouldn't want, so as long as they're okay i'm good!

JEV

I'm once again feeling pretty good this week. I've grown pretty close to Nash since nominating her in week 1 and she told me and Nathan we aren't going up so, there's that! She's told me Gina is going up and will be her target which I'm not thrilled about but hopefully Gina can pull some miracle and win POV. I'm a little worried about Emma and Jake too, as they've both said they haven't spoken to her much which is dumb, bc like hello??? its week 3, i feel esp with Jake, I can understand Emma bc Nash keeps leaving her on read but I don't think Jake has even tried much (crying emoji) So hopefully they can ALSO pull something out

JAKE

FUCK MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i hate everyone in this game t b h. why can't people just follow with a plan and go through with it like it aint that hard to put your chips on one person from your alliance so youre all safe like........ i dont think these ppl understand strategy and it's TIRING. i frankly am over people relying on their friendships to get themselves through another week bc fucking nash won an alliance-based hoh comp. now we have to deal w this fucking friend group running the house another week. i don't know if i'm safe i'm honestly probably going to be put up??? even tho nash is the one that CONSTANTLY ignores my PMs even tho ive given her paragraphs to respond to... she's gonna do whatever her little friends want her to do. i mean that's what she literally said to me. i was like pls don't nom me <3 and she was like "im not making any promises im just doing whatever the house wants me to do" like girl............ lkjghklsdfjhg what kind of dumbass bullshit response was that. just tell me you're putting me up or you're not. youre a big girl you can make your own fucking decisions.

i give nash what i would give any hoh if they won and that is "i'd never ever nominate you it's never even crossed my mind" and hoping that's enough to make her wanna keep me. she might think im not going after her but, if she's smart, she'll send me out the door this week before i can retaliate. 

im super super worried that jacob will be like oh jev n jake aligned in BBHOS9 u should put them up together since jev nominated you week 1. like i feel like she'd do ANYTHING jacob tells her at this point cuz shes just another one of his sheep so like hoping im good w jacob but he's such a wildcard idfk

at this point im just hoping me or emma don't get put up and if we do there will be a veto to be won and a nash/jacob to come after next so...... period

ARIA

yall i feel so fucking cracked and tired of everything but itS FINE!!! I got this easy peasy!! Im not going to always feel motivated but im doing my best and thats valid baby!!! So lets jump in, first off lets start with a random information dump of things i've collected

-jacob has talked about me w/ nicholas during pasio

-monty and jacob have a connection ( i dont even remember how)

-nathan nash (maybe jacob) obviously tight lmao

-joey monty close

-Jake made a counter alliance to Jacob's (actually joshes) alliance made of me gina saira emma and josh

-josh emma me alliance

-JOEY RECORDS CALLS

-Jake is wary of nathan (but also thinks hes cute ugh)

-told jake im wary of pasio peeps so he might nom them

-Jacob alliance STILL isnt created

-called with josh and told him that jacob is wary that the alliance isnt made yet

-jacob josh have a pregame

-told josh, saira and nick have a pregame

-josh kiki close

-josh thinks saira is a social threat 

-josh prefers jev over nathan

-told monty to talk to jake more

-told joshua jacob is the most connected person

-got back to nash gina doesnt like her

-jacob kiki nash confirmed trio alliance

-nash told jev gina is the target (jev then told jake)

-josh thought jacob was the original maker of the alliance

-jake thinks jacob/josh are snakes

-jake also thinks jacob-josh-nash-kiki-bri-nick-nathan are an alliance

-josh wants to play the middle w/ me :uwu:

 So from here I want to get into how my ideal week will go and how it will realistically go. IDEALLY Nash noms jev and josh with them not winning veto and the house gets rid of a utr social threat but realistically its gonne be gina and jake with gina going bc she doesnt talk to anyone of have any motivation for this game (I LITERALLY WROTE HER A PARAGRAPH TO SEND TO NASH TO NOT BE NOMINATED AND SHE GOES "hmm idk maybe ill send it" LIKE????) 

Okay the other thing im freaking out about is bc i feel like theres tension between me Jacob Josh and Jake and im not sure what it is about. I mean i kinda do but im missing key components. The whole situation just doesn't sit right with me at all and I feel very at odds with them in a weird kinda way. I've explained this so many times but i have such a bad feeling that josh leaked the janelle alliance to jacob and is more with him than me and now josh is setting these two sides against each other and i just heard from him that nash isnt nomming him so now im really uncomfy ughhhh i have such a bad feeling and i really need to work on people like jev saira monty to make sure i have people behind me i can fall back on, but also im getting the vibe jake really really trusts me which is great because i want to go far with him as well, unless hes just misting me SUPER hard ughhh

god i just have such a bad feeling about this week buts its fINE totally fine ill work it out eventually,,,but now its trust ranking time yay

1.Gina (youre so inactive i adore you!)

2.Joshua (kid GANG!!! thank you for trusting me sometimes <3)

3.Jake (hes a crackhead but hes my crackhead)

VERY BIG GAP

4.Emma (shes chilling what a lovely gal)

5.Monty (better inactive than be active and a threat)

6.Nathan (youre kinda sketchy but hes like a funky older brother)

7.Josh (youre at the center of a balancing act i wonder if u can keep it up)

8.Nick (they always give such an honest vibe,,,,,i dont trust it)

9.Brianna (shes so sweet but the sweetest angels make the fiercest demons)

10.Jev(,,,,your on slightly thicker ice than joey but combined with a little more charisma)

ANOTHER GAP WOOT WOOT

11.Joey (youre on THIN fucking ice buddy,,,,please be more open w/ me)

12.Saira (im begging for u to talk game to me,,, but also since we havent talked u cant snake me yet)

13. Jacob (idk ily sm but youre so fcking connected and idk if i reached ur inner circle yet)

14. Kiki (my favorite furry)

15.Nash (please talk to me im begging ill do anything please plsease plaease plae-)

So update ive been talking around and wow this game loves looking at my allies and kicking them in the kneecaps while spitting in their eyes ugh. So nash is probably leaning towards nomming jake and Gina with gina as the target (really weird that jake is nommed makes me think jacob had some influence there) but in that scenario best case is that veto is used and anyone but josh goes up and that person leaves easy fucking peasy!! Anyway i just talked with josh and apparently jacob was the one who came up with the alliance idea which is interesting bc he tried to pin it on josh. Anyways not to totally contradict my initial rant but me and josh had a really good chat where we're kinda in the same position between two groups (the og alliance and janelle) and we dont know if we should make the og alliance and with who bc of janelle so we're struggling to see whats the correct move from here....or maybe josh is completely misting me but i fucking hope not ugh- either way im surviving this week and thats that!!

JEV

I'm realising that I'm getting myself into a pretty tight position since I have firm alliances with Emma & Jake and Nash & Nathan, as well as being extremely close to Josh C, which could prove difficult for me down the line, but I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

KIKI

https://youtu.be/6cn8xUFWqhA

BRIANNA

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1XvZzg3dTEZ89VeFbG3bxk4JFNtr7Ixm0/view?usp=sharing 

i had to use google drive bc it wouldn't take my file on youtube :((((

JEV

So right now I've somehow accidentally wriggled my way into conspiring with Nash on how best to take Gina out, which is so dumb of me because I don't really want to see Gina leave this week, but at the same time I'm having to fight Nash's decision because she wants to put Emma up beside her and... I can't let that happen because I'm worried Emma would leave over Gina

JEV

So I'm speaking to Nash, taking the heat off of Emma by telling her I feel she could be a number for me/her/Nathan down the line, and now I'm pushing for Brianna to go up since Nash wants someone who 100% wouldn't leave over Gina and I'm thinking like... WHO would vote to evict Brianna, but at the same time I'm feeling super terrible about it because Brianna is a literal angel

JEV

Wow a lot going on so I'm trying to update as best I can, Nash is saying she's going to randomise for who goes to the upside down so I'm having to encourage her not to include me or Nathan in the randomisation just incase she needs us for strategising but REALLY its so I can stay and hang around and try my best to keep Emma from touching the block at all this week.

NASH

sorry for nominating women i didnt mean it.

EMMA

If i am being honest the more this game goes by i get so unmotivated and its only week 3 i suck because well in bbgames like galar and almia i mostly played from the bottom now im like alright i kinda want to fuck up my game for fun but kinda pisses me off a bit that i almost could of been nominated if it wasnt for jev but that pisses me off so much i tried talking to nash but i get left on read i dont take things 100x personal unless if somebody is being mean like laughing etc but knowing that i would be on the block over brianna when i did try talking to nash its still hurts a little but if somebody like gina wins veto if i get on the block it issss what it isss i guess but i played on the bottom way to many times maybe i can do this??

JEV

So my efforts worked and Brianna went up instead of Emma, now I've just gotta hope neither of the noms win POV/that the POV isn't used so I don't have to throw someone elses name out there to Nash :flushed:

JOSH

hello ladies and gays. straights aren't welcome here.

today, we are feeling GOOD because the person we nominated just a few days ago won power and STILL didn't nominate me. is that iconnery or what? i was honestly ready for my ass to be TOAST but i did approach nash before they won HOH and had a conversation about where we stood and they said i would be OKAY this week bc we did start talking. we love to see it, yes we do!

the nominees this week are gina and brianna and.. even though i'm in two different alliances with both of them, i'm not mad at either of them going up. i don't REALLY talk with either and i'd be happy to see either one of them go. the tricky part will be figuring out WHO to vote when the time comes, but we have a POV to happen before we get there. we'll SEE.

if i had to choose, i'd probably send brianna home simply because i find her a bit CHAOTIC where i feel like gina isn't really going to cause a lot of waves with me. she's much more quiet whereas brianna is more likely to be able to pick herself back up.

some other fun events going on:

jake was NOT happy about nash winning and thought he was going to get nominated because of it. he was about to RIP nash a new one and is really brewing with how much he hates them. MAKES ME LAUGH A LIL BECAUSE IT WAS SO UNWARRANTED BUT NEVERTHELESS, it's something to note that jake does NOT like nash.

i think aria is my number one right now bc we get along really well and have very similar opinions. i'm really open with how i talk to her so i'm HOPING she's not spilling everything i say to someone else but i don't think she WOULD? i dunno. i love her energy and i'm hoping we can SLICE AND DICE together in the middle.

my strategy is to take my HOH under my belt and take a step back for a minute while my two alliances (one: jake, aria, gina, emma, saira, me & two: jacob, aria, brianna, kiki, me) get picked off back and forth. i'm going to see if i can craft a narrative for them to go after each other but we'll SEE. there are a lot of people in the middle i enjoy a lot more than some of the people in my alliances so IDK. i feel like some people got thrown into these alliances that i did NOT want but they were kind of forced in so i don't trust it. and i think people KNOW because i'm not very chatty abt it in the chats (and i haven't even made one of the chats. am i supposed to? idk)

anyways that's all for now x 

ARIA

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zp71zzR-wgE

someone help

JAKE

https://voca.ro/g2ZQWs9x8du

JEV

Not miss Nash coming to me asking how I'd feel about being renom :flushed:

JEV

So I literally just woke up from a sleep and in the space of 30 minutes have had to talk Nash out of renomming me, Emma or Jake since we've just made an alliance together so I warned her that probably wouldn't work out for us in the long run. We narrowed it down and she shortlisted Aria, Josh C, Monty & Nick, and I have spun her to try and get her to nominate Aria, because 1. I don't wanna see Josh C go up and 2. like with Brianna I feel nobody here would vote to evict Aria, and Nash wants Gina GONE (crying emoji) so I feel this was the only logical renom to suggest.

JEV

The conversation has turned back to Emma and I just really don't wanna let that happen because I do feel like she'd leave over Gina. Part of me is saying not to stick my neck out too much to save Emma but at the same time she's my number 1 in this game and I hope she'd return the favour if she was in my position.

NASH

this was literally one of the worst decisions i've ever had to make so now i'm just kinda pissed off! 

ARIA

Well,,,, FBSFJDF I feel like im making so many of these but honestly this game changes everyday so please dont be too annoyed by me uwu, the mood swing i had just this DAY was insane so lets begin w/ the general info-

IN TIME LINE ORDER

-Jev told jake that something about noms but acted dumb when I asked

-Gina/Joshua/Aria alliance created!!

-Saira and Josh are close

- VIDEO DR GOES HERE

-Jake spills Emma-Jev-Nathan-Nash-Jake alliance with Emma/Jev/Jake being a trio as well= Jev created the alliance

-Jev prefers gina out

-jake doesnt believe in screenshots or recording calls

-Jev and Jake are close

-Jev/Jacob/Jake all played together before

-I leaked Bri's backups to Jake as well as Jacob's trio with Nash and Kiki

-nash almost backdoored jev bc he wasnt responding to her

-jev was the reason i was almost otb

-I WAS ALMOST OTB

-Josh AND Jacob both want Jake out

-Bri thinks nash's comp ability is scary

-Nash and Nick are close 

-Jacob nervous about Bri's backup leaking

-Jacob barely talks w/ saira and monty

-made a final three w/ jacob josh called malibu

So now im debating whether its morally okay for me to analyze what happened in the living room in a game sense. FBSdffan So lets run down things in chronological order and I might mention my thoughts if they arent too controversial, Nathan leaks the alliance with jev/nash/jake/emma. Eventually emma says 'i wanna know who put these thoughts in the hohs head" and nick starts to shut the discussion down which is an interesting contrast to their earlier attitude where they were very for the drama continuing, which leads me to begin they had some sort of hand in it. Nathan goes on to say he likes nash on a personal lvl which jake analyzes as a nod to a friendgroup and a mini confrontation between nathan and jake occur. I believe that part was just a misunderstanding on both parties account. Then happy discussion until Jake calls nash out for being in the diary session for too long which leads to a discussion of house guests over analyzing production and using that as a strategy which is ultimately unfair and also at this time I believe nash was going through itTM leading to their friends to be slightly defensive on their behalf (which is valid) and i after rereading things i really hope that they're okay, ultimately this leads up to frustration on Jake's part and his ultimate quit. 

I mean where do i go from here? I have the Bri's angels but that did get leaked to Emma on Jake's way out so i need to figure some way to micromanage that where i think im gonna make a emma jev alliance and work with them as a trio in the future (if gina goes) but rn i feel like this force of energy that is Bri's backups is gonna body for a bit but i think theyre gonna throw hoh leading me jev or emma to step up and body a bit. Like i think i might actually win hoh and nom nash and monty with a nick potential renom bc im BORED and nash continuing to skate by without even talking to me is not valid, and monty is so not here its like??? HEWWO??? but idk thats making big moves i may just chill a bit for now but i dont want jev and emma being targeted in the future bc theyre gonna be numbers for me and thats on PEWIOD!

HOST WEEKLY CAST ASSESSMENT

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L25lY813N1k&list=PLFEwPPy8j010XXwntq80VSU0qLNTNpSIN&index=4&t=0s

[jamathon]

Ask me! I'll answer honestly

1: How tall or short do you wish you were? lit 7′0″ 2: What’s your dream pet? (Real or not) cat 3: Do you have a favorite clothing style? met gala type fancy for sure.  4: What was your favorite video game growing up? Just dance 5: What three things/people do you think of most each day? My gf, boulder, art, 

6: If you had a warning label, what would yours say? "pwease no steppy” 7: What is your opinion on life? V weird. v cool 8: What is your Greek personality type? [Sanguine, Phlegmatic, Choleric, or Melancholic] I tihnkkkk it was melancholic but i shud take it again bc it’s def changed  9: Are you ticklish? very 10: Are you allergic to anything? not that i know yet 11: What’s your sexuality? gay bi gay bi gay bi.  12: Do you prefer tea, coffee, or cocoa? Tea 13: Are you a cat or dog person? cat 14: Would you rather be a vampire, elf, or merperson? whichever one is least lonely. probably merperson. 15: Do you have a favorite Youtuber? Alex bertie!! 16: How tall are you? 5′4 17: If you had to change your name, what would you change it to? Kiwi 18: How much do you weigh? [Only ask this if you know the user doesn’t mind!] likeee 125 19: Do you believe in ghosts/spirits? pass. 20: Do you like space or the ocean more? Ocean.  21: Are you religious? No 22: Pet peeves? A . Lot. im so impatient.  23: Would you rather be nocturnal or diurnal [opposite of nocturnal]? Diurnal! 24: Favorite constellation? uhhhh *panics and looks around kitchen* the big spoon 25: Favorite star? North bc i used to see it every night after work and i didn’t know it alr had a name so i named it after my gf as a romantic gesture hahhahaha 26: Do you like ball-jointed dolls? Yuh 27: Any phobias or fears? Afraid of loneliness  28: Do you think global warming is real? shut up.  29: Do you believe in reincarnation? Havent thought about it 30: Favorite movie? Scott pilgrim 31: Do you get scared easily? Yes 32: How many pets have you own in your lifetime? 1 33: Blog rate? [You’ll rate the blog of the one who’s asking.] my blogs a 10 even tho i still have the OG tumblr theme 34: What is a color that calms you? blue 35: Where would you like to travel and/or live? Iceland 36: Where were you born? baltimore 37: What is your eye color? hazel 38: Introvert or extrovert? both 39: Do you believe in horoscopes and zodiacs? hahahhaha yesss 40: Hugs or kisses? bofa 41: Who is someone you would like to see/visit right now? Would love to visit boulder i miss the mountains & weather a lot 42: Who is someone you love deeply? Rayven 43: Any piercings you want? septum tbh 44: Do you like tattoos and piercings? yes. v hot 45: Do you smoke or have you eiver done so? not anymore 46: Talk about your crush, if you have one! Rayven is my crush and also my gf she’s about to turn 21 which is exciting!! this feels like show n tell haha 47: What is a sound you really hate? fingernail scratching jeans 48: A sound you really love? keys jingling 49: Can you do a backflip? no 50: Can you do the splits?  no 51: Favorite actor and/or actress? emma stone  52: Favorite movie?alr asked. scotty P. 53: How are you feeling right now? fine but restless bc of a tummy ache 54: What color would you like your hair to be right now? back to black acctuallly im tired of dying it  55: When did you feel happiest? idk 56: Something that calms you down? tumblr 57: Have any mental disorders? [Only ask this if you know the user doesn’t mind!] havent had an evaluation in years so idk! 58: What does your URL mean? that’s my JAMATHON!!! To describe a good song. A word i tried to make happen. like fetch. except not original, just “jam” with “athon” added.  59: What three words describe you the most? Understanding. Funny. Intense.  60: Do you believe in evolution? Yes 61: What makes you unfollow a blog? If they dont post enuf memes 62: What makes you follow a blog? Memes 63: Favorite kind of person: Funny, outgoing, spontaneous  64: Favorite animal(s): Whales 65: Name three of your favorite blogs. eh idk 66: Favorite emoticon: the drooling one 67: Favorite meme: too many 68: What is your MBTI personality type? intp idk if that’s right 69: What is your star sign? capricorn  70: Can your dog roll over on command, if you have a dog? no 71: What outfit out of all your clothes do you like to wear the most? i like layers. probably my leather jacket w black pants and a my yellow shirt. it makes me feel cute 72: Post a selfie or two? too hard 73: Do you have platform shoes? yes 74: What is one random but interesting fact about yourself? I used to be double jointed and could bend my finger back to touch my hand, unsure what happened but now i have 0 party tricks 75: Can you do a front flip? yeah probably 76: Do you like birds? So much!!!!!! 77: Do you like to swim? no!!!!!! 78: Is swimming or ice skating more fun to you? swimming... 79: Something you wish didn’t exist: pollution 80: Some thing you wish did exist: cures 81: Piercings you have? ears 82: Something you really enjoy doing: playing music/drawing/taking pictures 83: Favorite person to talk to: rayven 84: What was your first impression of Tumblr? cupcakes 85: How many followers do you have? like 100 on this blog now hahaha 86: Can you run a mile within ten minutes? yes but will I? No. 87: Do your socks always match? No 88: Can you touch your toes and keep your legs straight completely? No 89: What are your birthstones? Turquoise  90: If you were an animal, which one would you be? Fox 91: If a flower could aesthetically represent you, what kind would it be? I want to be creative but when i think about it...a red rose.  92: A store you hate? The grocery store bc im there all the time 93: How many cups of coffee can you drink in one day? zero now but at the beginning of the year i was drinking around 4-5 a day.  94: Would you rather be able to fly or read minds? fly 95: Do you like to wear camo? nah 96: Winter or summer? Used to be winter but nothing is good in the south. 97: How long can you hold your breath for? not long at all it gives me anxiety 98: Least favorite person? some of the people ive met in the past year have been atrocious.  99: Someone you look up to: My roommate Chris.  100: A store you love? I could spend all day in H&M  101: Favorite type of shoes? vans 102: Where do you live? ....atlanta 103: Are you a vegetarian or vegan? If so, why? Yes bc my girlfriend is and we always share food so like... i guess i eat meat on my own but that’s liike once a month haha 104: What is your favorite mineral or gem? hmmm...bismuth. 105: Do you drink milk? No 106: Do you like bugs? Not in the south. 107: Do you like spiders? NO. 108: Something you get paranoid about? Bugs. 109: Can you draw: NO. 110: Nosiest question you have ever been asked? people love prying idk at this point 111: A question you hate being asked? are u a boy or a girl has definitely gotten old 112: Ever been bitten by a spider? yes 113: Do you like the sound of waves at the beach? yesssssss 114: Do you prefer cloudy or sunny days? depends 115: Someone you’d like to kiss or cuddle right now: my gf 116: Favorite cloud type: rain cloud 117: What color do you wish the sky was? orange.  118: Do you have freckles? yes 119: Favorite thing about a person: humor 120: Fruits or vegetables? veggies 121: Something you want to do right now: sleep but im restless :( 122: Is the ocean or sky prettier? hmmmm depends 123: Sweet or sour foods? sweet for sure.  124: Bright or dim lights? bright bc i need new glasses and cant see in dim light 125: Do you believe in a certain magical creature? dragons  126: Something you hate about Tumblr: nothing really 127: Something you love about Tumblr: takes my mind off everything 128: What do you think about the least? everything i shud be thinking about 129: What would you want written on your tombstone? something super funny that i cant think of rn 130: Who would you like to punch in the face right now? John cena bc i think he’d find it funny 131: What is something you love but also hate about yourself? Inability to fake happiness  132: Do you smile with your teeth showing for pictures? sometimes! 133: Computer or TV? computer bc its both 134: Do you like roller coasters?  no 135: Do you get motion sickness or seasickness? yes 136: Are your ears lobed or attached? lobed bruh 137: Do you believe in karma? idk 138: On a scale of 1-10, how attractive would you say you are? strong 8.5! I don’t think im too shabby most of the time actually 139: What nicknames do you have/have had? kiwi 140: Did you have any pretend or imaginary friends? yes named Kiki  141: Have you ever seen a therapist/shrink? plenty  142: Would you say you are a good or bad influence to others? Depends 143: Do you prefer giving or receiving gifts/help? Receiving  144: What makes you angry? people not being nice really irks me 145: How many languages do you speak fluently? 1 146: Do you prefer boys, girls, and/or non-binaries? tag yourself im nonbinaries  147: Are you androgynous? i’d say  148: Favorite physical thing about yourself: lately it’s been my chest. it’s p hot 149: Favorite thing about your personality: I’m funny.  150: Name three people you would like to talk to right now in person. uhh idk 151: If you could go back into time and live in one era, which would you choose? the uhhh one w swords  152: Do you like BuzzFeed? ya 153: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend/partner? [If you have one.] Tindeerrrrr  hah 154: Do you like to kiss others’ foreheads or hands for platonic reasons? uh idk 155: Do you like to play with others’ hair? ya 156: What embarrasses you? a lot 157: Something that makes you nervous/anxious: when other people are noticably anxious  158: Biggest lie you have ever told: idk 159: How many people are you following? lots  160: How many posts do you have on your blog(s)? lots 161: How many drafts do you have on your blog(s)? like 50 162: How many likes do you have on your blog(s)? like 3,000 ishhhh  163: Last time you cried and why: My birthday bc one of rayvens gifts was ....so ....fuckin..sweet 164: Do you have long or short hair? short 165: Longest your hair has ever been: long 166: Why do you like, dislike, or have neutral feelings about religon? It’s annoying lmfao 167: Do you really care how the universe and world was created? Only bc im nosy 168: Do you like to wear makeup? no 169: Can you stand on your hands or head for more than thirty seconds? no 170: Did you answer the questions you were asked truthfully? yup

[chocolateflavoredsluch-blog]

August 1

Sometime around mid-April, I met a man named John at the ND spring game tailgate. John is the total opposite of what I was going for--white and old. Like 43 years old old. Divorced with three kids old. Like, young kids. Like, still changing diapers young--just one of them, but still. 

How We Met:

Me, Jackie and Jas had just showed up to the mostly black tailgate. Actually, it was the most back people I’d seen on the ND campus besides seeing the football team walk around campus together (ha.) In my head, I was thinking “Now’s your chance! Finally snag that older black man/sugar daddy you’ve been wanting to. These young boys ain’t the move no more!” So, we were at the make shift bar, laughing and being stupid. I was completely in my element. I didn’t have to worry about my law school image--didn’t want to come off as being too black and alienating myself from my classmates. So I was comfortable to laugh, dance, and look around. As my cup of henny (no ice) was being poured, I casually glanced over at a tall white man with sunglasses across the tailgate. He seemed out of place with this crowd. Not just because he wasn’t black, but because of the goofy way he held himself and the clothing he wore. Although I couldn’t see his eyes, I could feel him gazing at me. I blinked and looked away, telling myself “You ain’t got time for that....these white men are just like the white boys here I guess. They love to look and don’t do shit about it.” Two seconds later, this tall, white man was standing less than one foot away from me. 

--honestly, I don’t know much of the conversation that happened during this first encounter. But, I do remember him saying I was beautiful. He was divorced with three kids (red flag). He used to play football at Notre Dame. The fact that I don’t remember what was said is not indicative of how much I enjoyed the conversation. The fact that I don’t remember is probably influenced by the henny that had infiltrated my system. That probably gave me the courage and confidence to talk to this man. I actually remember thinking “Wow. This is the most stimulating conversation I’ve had with the opposite sex in a long time.” So, I entertained him. After talking my ear off (i very much enjoyed it) for quite a while, he said he’d leave me to be with my friends. Naturally, Jackie was cracking jokes less than 2 seconds from when he walked away. I honestly thought it was all games. He just wanted to flirt with the young, tall, black girl. He asked if I wanted to smoke in his car. And, because I had that liquid courage I accepted his invitation. As I left my friends, I started thinking “Girl wtf is you doing going with this white man?!” Even though his car was within plain sight of everyone at the tailgate. Nonetheless, when we got in the car, and I saw him pull out a damn mason jar of weed, I said I didn’t want to smoke anymore. We left the car. And then he left me because he felt like we had spent a lot of time together since I’d been at the tailgate. Which was very very true. Lol.

A little time went by. He came back around while we were sitting on the coolers. We started talking some more. And he casually asked me on the date. Of course, I thought he was kidding bc these kinds of things just don’t happen to me. Random guys don’t seriously ask me on dates. They’re always kidding or just talking out their ass or something. And, it didn’t help that he turned it into a bet. He told me, if he could convince this random guy to take off a sweater that he wore across his shoulders, I would have to go on a date with him. So, I agreed because no one goes on dates based off bets, and he wasn’t going to tell that guy anything. He didn’t know him! Well, clearly I didn’t know John. Less than 10 minutes later, the guy with the sweater came over and told me John had helped him to figure out the sweater was not flattering anymore. And that I should go on a date with him. I shook my head in freaking bewilderment. This man actually followed through.

I saw John out the corner of my eye and ignored him, thinking bc his game was over, he didn’t really care about the chase anymore. Of course, he walked over. He started telling about where he wanted to take me in South Bend. Started telling me about the food places in Chicago that he’d love to take me too. How he was a big food critic for a while in Chicago before he started working in the food distribution business. I didn’t even question anything he said because he actually had a whole job. He could afford to take me out on dates--AND FEED ME. So, I agreed, once again, to go out on a date with him 5 days later. Once again, he left me to talk to my friends. I had to go to a stupid law school baseball thing, so I left. Without saying goodbye to the overzealous, quirky white man. As I was walking to my car he sent me a Kendrick Lamar song--Lust. At the time, I was like “Now nigga. Wtf.” But, I would later learn that John literally puts his apple music on shuffle and usually sends me whatever song sounds good to him at the time. 

I would write about the first date and the second date, and our first weekend in Chicago, and our themed date weekends, but I want to get to the point of this post. Which I should’ve written when the events were fresh on my mind. I’ll write it later....or not.

The Point of This Post:

But, all this say--I knew he had small kids when I met him, and I still decided to go out on a date with him. Now, to be honest, I didn’t expect for this to go anywhere. Clearly I was wrong af, because here I am four months later, helping this man decorate his lake house and calling him 2 plus times a day on the phone. And I’ve met Kiki, his youngest. Sweet, clingy baby. The cutest. And I really didn’t mind the fact that he has her on the weekends until he came to Dallas a couple weeks ago and we got to spend an entire weekend not worrying about her. And it made me realize, this is going to be the reason we break up--his kids. No. I’m not trying to find a reason to fuck this up. I know myself and I’m being realistic. I enjoy spending time with John. I love spending time with John. And he feels the same. That’s when we’re at our best. Whether it’s in public and we’re talking for hours over wine and happy hour drinks. Or we’re in the bed talking abut nothing and everything at the same time. We can’t do that with Kiki around. She literally started crying when I put my hand on John’s chest when we were about to go to bed. I don’t fucking have time for that. I’m young af and the world is mine. I want for us to be able to do whatever the fuck we want, when we want, as if I were dating someone my age with no kids, no ex-wife, no baby momma. And the baby momma drama? I hate that shit too. I love the qualities that John possesses --hate his circumstances. 

And I’m not going to be selfish enough to make him choose between me and his kids. Like, who tf am I? But, I also know I’m not going to tell him why I break up with him down the road. I mean, he has Kiki every Saturday-Monday, and every Wednesday-Thursday. So, that leaves Monday evening, Tuesday and Friday for us -_- I don’t want to be a mother to a child that’s not mine the majority of the time I’m with John. Now I see why couples want to wait a while to have kids after they’re married. Spending time with Kiki and John doesn't make me resent Kiki. It makes me resent John for not disclosing all this extra bullshit in the beginning. And it makes me hate myself for not seeing the signs earlier and dipping out when I could. It makes me wish I had dismissed him after that first date, which was my intention. Block his number and never talk or hear from him again. 

AND TO MAKE MATTERS WORSE, THIS IS A PROBLEM WITH 1/3 OF HIS KIDS. SO IMAGINE WHEN HE HAS ALL THREE?! 

The shittiest part of it all? He’s going to know something is wrong and I’m gonna have to tell him.