#everything does work out for the record. but not as easily as it does with the power of love!!!!

[kainebell]

Immortal Desires: Paths Not Taken is just the writers saying “oh you hate the love triangle? you want to lock in to an LI early on? ok well if you did that, you wouldn’t have the power of polyamory to save Crimson Beech” and I think that’s beautiful

[gotta-winwin]

OT13 Reaction -- the aha moment

or...how they realize they're in love with you

seungcheol doesn't get that aha moment, falling in love isn't something that happens within seconds for him. it's like he's slowly drifting into love, not even realizing you've become the focal point of his entire existence. when it finally hits him, it's a quiet, simple moment. he's watching you make him breakfast in the morning, admiring you quietly from the kitchen counter. he zones out for a moment, blinking suddenly and realizing damn. that's my woman. and he knows he's ruined for life.

it's kind of silly, how jeonghan realizes he's in love with you. he's just returned home from a busy day at work, entering the house to find it empty. searching the place top to bottom, he's about to call you when - BOO - you jump out from one of the closets and scares the soul out of him. he's clutching his chest, watching as you collapse onto the ground in a fit of giggles. he can't help but laugh along, realizing through the chaos that he's found his soulmate, and he'd be damned not to admit he's in love with you.

joshua's a simple man by nature. he's easily happy in life, only needing his members, his job, his lifestyle, and of course, you. it doesn't take long into your relationship before he realizes he's in love, as the two of you take a stroll along the Han River after a long day. he's watching the setting sun reflect against your figure, taking his phone out to snap a few pictures. it's when he notices his camera roll is full of pictures of you does he think well, that's it. i'm in love.

upon meeting his family, jun notices how much work you've put into it. you're doing your best to speak his town's dialect, communicating with his parents in a language that made them most comfortable. his heart swells when he sees you amidst his childhood home, trading stories and eating with the people who raised him. it's when he notes that you look so perfect here that he realizes you just fit. he's in love.

as if everything else is with soonyoung, his aha moment is full of fireworks and pizzazz. having just finished the most record breaking performance of his life, he finds himself with one thought only: i want to go home. usually, it's because he's tired. but now, ever since you stumbled into his life, he finds himself wanting, needing, to go home so he can hold you and recite everything that happened today. he's practically thrumming with energy to rush home, and everyone around him sees what is so painfully obvious. he's so in love.

wonwoo's always credited himself to be a loner. not a lot of people can fit with his quiet personality, so when you offer the idea of "parallel play" he's a little confused. his heart warms when you explain that you don't mind doing separate things as long as you're in the same area, understanding that he needs more time to himself than others might. it's when you tell him you love him enough to compromise does he think im so in love with this girl right now.

woozi's used to writing songs dedicated to his fans and members. he sits down for another writing session, brainstorming ideas and the thought of you pops into his mind. he shrugs, thinking it might be nice to mix it up a bit, sitting down to write something about you. it's when he reads his own words back does he realize he's irrevocably screwed and so in love with you. thought about settling down, buying her a house and saying screw the music. yeah, he's in love.

having always been a realist, minghao doesn't necessary believe in true love, or love at first sight. he understands there's going to be someone out there for him, but he's skeptical that that someone is going to be perfect. all his beliefs go out the window the moment he sees you - it's like you're surrounded by a golden glow - and he realizes maybe love at first sight can be real.

seokmin loves and gives as easy as breathing. he's always been a generous guy, and it's when you sit him down and kindly remind him to leave some for himself does he stare at you and realize ok i've found the one. you've become that steadiness in his life that used to be just his members, and you love and give to him like it's as simple as breathing too.

having always been the resident cook, mingyu's eyeing your food creation like it's some kind of poison or drug. he had insisted you didn't need to cook for him, he's always been the cook and doesn't mind it, but you were stubborn and he relented. it's when the first bite blows him away does he realize he kinda misses having someone cook for him too. if you're this good at cooking i might just have to marry you, he says, ignoring how you blush, going back for another bite.

seungkwan's always been the entertainer. he doesn't mind it, he enjoys the fact it's his job to make everyone laugh. but when times get tough and he's in no mood to be the entertainer, you're right there to support him. it's when he gets home to you after a particularly rough day and you welcome him in with open arms, murmuring how he's done well and doesn't need to do more. it's when he realizes he can just be seungkwan - not seungkwan the entertainer, but just seungkwan - and he loves you for that.

vernon never really thought about finding the one. he always just assumed that they would find him. and that's exactly what happens, when you bump into each other at the movie theatre - both there alone just cause. it's when you're enthusiastically going band for band with vernon about movies that he's forced with the realization that shit. maybe i have found the one.

chan's always known he was in love with you. he doesn't like to admit it cause he thinks it makes him sound sappy, but he truly never questioned his love for you. it was a simple thing in his mind - this person makes me so fucking happy - i must be in love. and how could it not be simple for him? he's staring at you quipping about some joke to his friends and he's thinking i love you. he's watching you just wake up from a nap and he's thinking i love you. he sees a text from you on his phone mid-dance practice. i love you. he's always been in love with you because he loves everything to do with you.

[munsonsmixtapes]

I'm Not That Girl

Fiyero Tigelaar x shy!fem!reader

summary: you think Fiyero is only flirting you to be nice because you're not the kind of girl he usually goes for, but he's more than eager to set the record straight when confusion arises

This is based on a comment made on this post by @cultish-corner!

Nothing but anxiety courses through you the second you step foot on campus. You don’t know anyone and are nothing but nervous to be in a new place with new people. That’s your worst nightmare, you think, as you walk throughout the campus to the suite you were assigned, you can’t help but feel like everyone is staring at you, but absolutely no one is paying you any mind as you make your way down the hallway, repeatedly looking down at the sheet you’ve received to make sure you have the right room.

This is the first time you’ve ever been away from home for an extended period of time and you hate that you already miss it. But you’re excited for a new adventure. Even though you’re nervous, you’re still looking forward to what your time at Shiz will bring you. You’re looking forward to a change.

You’re so focused on looking at the sheet that you’re not even looking when you bump into something, or rather, someone. The collision causes your things to fall out of your hands and onto the floor, causing the stranger to drop to their knees, picking it all up rather quickly before holding your suitcase and papers out to you, a flirty smile on his pretty face that you only see out of the corner of your eyes because you’re afraid of making eye contact with him. 

“Here,” he says, handing the paper to you, still holding onto your suitcase which confuses you.

“Oh,” you reply. “Thank you.” 

He’s easily the prettiest man you’ve ever seen and you can’t help but be distracted by his striking blue eyes that definitely have a very flirty glint in them. You immediately recognize him as the prince you had seen in the newspaper not too long ago, seeing that he’d transferred here. You know all about his reputation, but that doesn’t stop you from wanting to speak to him. In fact, it makes you want to do it even more.

“It’s my pleasure. I am so sorry for my clumsiness,” he apologizes even though it was very obviously you who ran into him. “I guess I was just so distracted by your beauty.” You don’t care if it’s a line, it works, causing your cheeks to heat as you tuck your chin to your chest, not wanting him to see you. 

“My apologies,” he sticks his hand out and takes free one, causing you to finally look up at him and you’re captivated by his pretty, blue eyes. “Fiyero Tiglaar, Winkie Country,” he says as his lips press a soft kiss to the top of your hand. 

“I-I’m y/n,” you introduce yourself, your voice still too soft for your liking. 

“Y/n,” he repeats your name slowly, a flirty tone to it and you just know that he does this with everyone he comes across, but you hope, you pray that this is different. You want him to be flirting with you because he thinks you’re pretty, not because he can. “I think that might be my favorite name of all.” 

“Now, shall we?” He asks, moving to stand beside you, offering you his arm and you loop your own arm through it before he reaches over and grabs hold of your luggage. 

“Where are we going?” You ask, your voice so low that Fiyero is almost unable to hear you. 

“I’m going to walk you to your room,” he says with a bright smile, leading you down the hallway, everyone who’s around whispering as the two of you walk together. It’s no secret that he’s popular, how could he not be with his looks and charm? And seeing him with you, the shy, new girl will definitely stir up some rumors. 

Your room is just down the hall and even though he’s only just met you, Fiyero doesn’t want to leave you. He wants you to invite him inside where the two of you sit on your bed and get to know each other. He wants to know everything about you. He wants to know where you grew up, what your hobbies are, whatever you want to tell him because he likes the sound of your voice.

“We’ll, here we are,” he says, hesitantly removing his arms from yours as you step away before taking your suitcase back from him. “It was a pleasure.” He bows then stands there, almost like he’s waiting for something. 

“Here we are,” you repeat, wondering what it is that he’s wanting. He should at least be halfway down the hall by now.

“Tomorrow, you should sit with me in the dining hall. I’d really enjoy your company,” he smiles and you nod in response. 

“I’d really like that,” you tell him, still nodding, feeling a warmth creep on your cheeks as you do so. You don’t know why you take him so seriously. Guys like him don’t ever give you so much as a second glance let alone a lunch invitation. By tomorrow, Fiyero will forget all about you.

The hallway is quiet and empty when you sneak out of your room. You can’t sleep because of how nervous you are for your first day of classes. Especially since it’s a few months into the year and you’re the only new person. Everyone else has gotten the chance to know each other and you’re new. 

It’s taking everything in you not to pack up your stuff and leave so you don’t have to face anyone tomorrow. You don’t care if it’s dramatic or that you’re overreacting, it’s not like anyone will miss you anyway. You always seem to fade into the background no matter what’s going on and that’s the way you like it. You hate being the center of attention and know that it will distract you from your first day if everyone is staring at you. 

You close the door gently and turn around slowly, letting out a yelp as you see Fiyero leaning against the wall across from you. He’s in his pajamas so you’re led to believe that he can’t sleep either. And he can’t, but not for the same reason as you. He’s just not tired and that’s not uncommon for him. He often has trouble sleeping. But tonight, he’s hoping you’ll keep him company so he doesn’t have to go back to bed alone. 

He pushes off of the wall and steps over to you, moving slowly because he can see that he’s startled you. You take a step forward and he can’t help but stare at you, wondering what you’re also doing up so late. 

“What are you doing up?” He asks, his eyebrows furrowing in both confusion and worry. He wants to reach for you, but he decides against it. If there’s going to be any touching, he wants you to be the one to initiate it. 

“Couldn’t sleep,” you shake your head and he nods in understanding. His face softens and that infectious smile spreads across it. You can’t help but mimic him and that’s definitely something he could get used to seeing more often. 

“Me neither,” he replies then offers his hand out to you. “Would you like to go somewhere with me?” Go somewhere with him? You look this way and that to make sure there’s no one else he could possibly be talking to and he just laughs in response, a little too loudly for your liking. 

You step closer and press the palm of your hand to his lips to muffle his laughs and you both widen your eyes at your boldness. His eyes soften before yours do, more laughs spilling from his mouth as he pulls your hand away, holding it in his. 

“You’re going to get us in trouble,” you whisper to him and his laughs slowly turn into chuckles as he gives your hand a squeeze. 

“You need to relax,” he shakes his head. “And besides, trouble is my middle name.” You roll your eyes at his words and Fiyero really likes being able to more of your personality. “So,” he steps closer to you so that you’re toe to toe. “Are we going or what?” 

You’re not sure why, but you’ve found yourself to be at ease with him. He’s one of the only people who hasn’t had any problem with how shy and soft-spoken you are. He even seems to like it, not minding in the slightest having to get closer to hear what you have to say. In fact, he seems to prefer it.

“Yes,” you nod. “Let’s go.” 

“So you’re just going to blindly follow a man that you barely know to an unknown location where anything could happen to you?” He teases as he pulls you down the hallway and you never thought about it that way, and if it had been anyone else, maybe you would be worried, but not with Fiyero. “Well, y/n, I thought you knew better than that.” 

“And the same goes to you, Tigelaar,” you retort. “I could just as easily be as dangerous.”

“Somehow, I just don’t think that’s true. You’re far too sweet.” You hate that he’s right. It wouldn’t even cross your mind to hurt someone unless they made the first move. 

“You don’t even know me.” And he hates that he doesn’t. He hopes that in the coming weeks that you’ll be friends or maybe even more, but he knows the latter is probably just wishful thinking. 

“And that’s exactly why I invited you to join me tonight. I want to get to know you. It’s also the reason why I invited you to eat with me in the dining hall.” You’re confused now. You thought he was just trying to be nice. And now you feel terrible for even thinking that he wasn’t being genuine.

“You were serious about that?” Fiyero is quick to turn around to face you, hurt flashing across his face. And seeing the pain expression on yours is making him feel even worse. He thought that his intentions were pretty clear, but apparently he had been wrong. 

“O-of course I was serious. Why would I joke about that?” He’s leaning closer to you, taking your hands in his gently as he pulls you closer, wanting you to look him in the eyes when he speaks. “I invited you because I want to spend time with you, to get to know you. Don’t let anyone ever tell you any different,” he says as he pushes some hair away from your face. 

“I know it sounds silly since we’ve only just met, but I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you since this morning.” The look in his eye is nothing but genuine and now you feel silly for thinking that he was anything but. 

“I thought it was just me,” you reply, your eyes lighting up. 

“No,” he shakes his head, leaning even closer to you as his hands move to rest in your hips, his eyes searching your face for any sign of discomfort or hesitance. “Can I try something?” He asks in a whisper, his eyes shifting your lips and you think you know what he wants to try. 

“Yes,” you reply as your eyes flutter shut, feeling his breath fanning your face as he leans down and presses his lips to yours in a gentle kiss. Your arms wrap around his neck as he pulls you closer to him, responding to his kiss as your lips slot between his, moving with them as best as you can. 

Fiyero pulls away before you’re ready and pulls you a few feet before spinning you into him, pressing another kiss to your lips. He then takes you to the gardens where you spend the rest of the night, talking about everything and nothing between sweet kisses until the sun comes up. You think it’s needless to say that you’re really going to like it at Shiz.

[xomakara]

Can't Help Myself

SUMMARY |  Mingi comes home early from a trip to find his best friend's older sister, you, roaming the apartment in a large shirt and panties. And god, does he want you.

PAIRINGS | Mingi x Reader

RATING | Mature, NSFW, EXPLICIT, MDNI, 18+, Any Minors and Ageless Blogs will be blocked

GENRE |  smut, roommate!Mingi, brother's best friend trope, older woman/younger man trope, non-idol au

CONTENT/WARNINGS | profanity/strong language, filthy dirty thoughts, unprotected sex (wrap it up ya’ll!), female masturbation, fingering, oral sex (male/female receiving/giving), dirty talk, praise kink, pet names, vaginal penetration, kitchen sex, creampie, squirting

LENGTH | 5,744 words

TAGLIST |  ---

NETWORKS |  @illusionnet @cromernet @wonderlandnet @k-vanity @ksmutsociety @othersideoutlawsnetwork

AUTHOR’S NOTE |  Hi. Hello. This was supposed to be 2-3K words but it ended up longer. It's literally just smut lolol. And those Mingi pics for CK? geezes. Hope you all love and enjoy this. Love you ❤️

In your defense, you thought you were home alone so you didn’t second guess your wardrobe choice before walking out of your room and into the kitchen to rummage through the fridge for a snack. You really should have made sure first though.

You didn’t think much of it when your younger brother Yunho asked if you wanted to get a place with him and his best friend. It was a little more spacious, a lot nicer than your dorm room on campus, and still close enough for you to go to and from school and work easily. You knew Mingi, Yunho's best friend, forever, but when you told your parents they had suggested you take precautions. Mingi may have been a family friend of sorts but he was still male and he would be living there.

Both you and your brother dismissed their worries completely, assuring them Mingi had been like a younger brother, despite the year age gap, growing up and you could count the amount of times you ever heard him say anything even remotely perverted or gross to be none. But despite all this, you all still made a pact with your respective members of the household that your individual bedrooms were to stay firmly shut at all times and privacy would be respected and vice versa.

Earlier that week, Yunho said that he and Mingi would be going on a trip, somewhere with a bunch of their other friends, while the weather was still good. It would have been a trip you would have taken too, but you couldn't. School and work kept you here. You figured you would just catch up with everyone when they came back home.

They left a few days ago, leaving with a loud goodbye before you gave yourself the all-clear, allowing your usual messy, comfortable sleepwear to take over. It was going to be a relaxing day at home with no one there to scold you and you were going to do as you pleased.

Fast forward a few days later and you’re now standing in front of a confused Mingi, wearing nothing more than an oversized t-shirt that hangs off one shoulder and boy-short panties, leaving very little to the imagination.

Both of your arms are frozen, neither able to speak as you meet each other's gazes, Mingi's eyes darted lower as your arms come down in a sudden jerk to shield your exposed form from his eyes. His stare doesn't falter, but rather it hardens, taking everything that he can, burning the image into his brain.

This is Mingi, the family friend who played games with you and shared candies when you were younger. He was the same Mingi you would tease mercilessly as children before asking him, not so secretly, for advice about how to date a guy. This is the same Mingi you danced next to in the living room until both of you became nauseous because your moves had you spinning and twisting faster and faster. And it's the same Mingi you watched slam several cups of beer down like it was water during house parties like it was nothing. He had a bit of a track record for picking up girls with ease, the kind of guy girls looked up to and talked about dreamily whenever they thought no one could hear them.

Sure you had a silly crush on him growing up but you knew Mingi didn't think of you in that way. He treated you like an older sister and it showed. An older sibling was all he was likely to ever see.

But here and now, with the look Mingi is giving you, that all seems to go right out the window. If you thought his stare was hot when it was at eye level, there was no word that could come close to explaining how the scorching temperature went up even more in the downward, suggestive direction his stare had shifted.

For a moment you think you hear a hushed, muffled grunt come out of him, but it's gone as soon as it appears.

"M-mingi?" you mutter, clearing your throat a little. "What are you doing back so early?"

Mingi's expression doesn't change, if anything it seems to darken even more and if it was possible, you are sure he is undressing you even more with his eyes than before.

"Oh, uh...hi, noona. I had to leave early due to work," he says slowly.

You wait for more information, an explanation, something but he doesn't give one.

"... and?" You encourage and your response is an almost devilish-looking smirk. It has a strangely charming effect on you, but at the same time is enough to cause heat to flow through you, settling and concentrating at one very specific spot. You've never seen him look at someone like the way he's staring at you and you are surprised you didn't get caught on fire.

His eyes flick up and down your form slowly once more before locking on yours again and he stands up straight from the door. "It doesn't matter. I'm back now."

Damn. Now you had to go back to being dressed while stuck in the house alone for who knew how long.

"U-uh... okay? Alright, um," you swallow and squirm uncomfortably under Mingi's steady gaze, hoping he doesn't hear the way the breath catches in your throat. "I'm gonna go get dressed."

You wait, feeling incredibly awkward as he watches you without moving, but finally, after a moment Mingi turns and goes in the direction of his bedroom.

“Y/N-noona?” You hear him call out to you as you move away, feet already in motion toward the safety of your bedroom.

“Yeah?” you reply.

He leans against his bedroom doorway and sends a mischievous, somewhat predatory grin at you, causing your entire body to tingle at his intentions.

"You don’t have to cover up if you don’t want to. It’s not fair to you if Yunho and I get to walk around the place shirtless and you don’t. I won’t tell Yunho." he says simply before stepping into his bedroom and closing the door with a soft click.

You let out a deep exhale the moment you shut your bedroom door behind you, pulling a hand up to rest on your chest, feeling the rapid beating of your heart. Your knees felt weak and suddenly the image of Mingi had burned itself so deeply into the back of your lids that every time you closed your eyes, the image of Mingi smirking darkly at you made its appearance, causing a fire to flare up in you.

With a shaky but needy whimper, you find yourself falling into a heap on your bed. You rest a hand flat on your stomach, allowing your mind to fill with images of Mingi, remembering the feeling of his hard, broad shoulders from the hugs you would receive, his defined arms that seemed to give you comfort the times you got them wrapped around your form, and that confident, slightly cheeky smirk you had witnessed him sending at the female population several times.

You make sure the door is locked, not knowing whether you did it out of fear or need before the hand on your belly slowly slides down, fingertips gently ghosting along your lower belly, slowly heading for the cotton of your panties. They dipped below and you let out a tiny sigh at the touch of your hand between your legs. It was a tiny, delicate touch, yet it felt like sparks had erupted all over, tingling down your spine and in between your legs. Your teeth dug into the bottom lip hard in a bid to control your whines as one lone digit traced small circles, building you up.

It's not the first time you have pleasured yourself and had Mingi on your mind while doing it. You can't even count the many nights you spend laying in this very same position, imagining Mingi there. What his kisses would be like. The way his hands would glide along your body, causing you to arch into his touch, craving more contact from his body, while he pressed searing kisses all over your neck and chest, murmuring filthy words only the two of you could ever hear. 

What your mind is occupied with as your hips squirm a little are all the different scenarios you can think of. At first, your movements are small, just small pushes and rolls of your hips against your fingertips. You find yourself wondering what Mingi's hands would be like. How rough would he be or would he want to savor your body, lavishing the soft curves of your body with gentle touch, kisses, and teasing bites until he got closer to where you needed him? Would he be dirty? Would his words be enough to make you blush with his raw, sexual cravings? 

The sounds, oh the sounds he could draw from you.

Your breath hitches when the tiny moans coming from you make their way up and out of your lips and as good as this feels it's still not enough for you. Your imagination runs wild. The Mingi in your mind is taking control now, turning you around, the deft hands moving to knead your breasts, a warm, wet tongue swiping up the back of your neck, moving up until a hot mouth sucked, grazing your earlobe with his teeth.

And when the imaginary feeling of Mingi biting you while one hand trailed down the planes of your body before slipping beneath and your fingers move exactly the way you are fantasizing his hands were, in this situation, you find yourself burying your face in the sheets, doing your best to muffle all the noise coming from you.

One, two, three curling fingers are all it takes, and you have brought yourself to the peak already, the fire inside you burning, scorching even. The small coiling heat within your belly unraveled and you bit your pillowcase as hard as you could, hoping the soft fabric of your bed would block out all of your noises.

As soon as the fire dies out the heaviness of your eyelids overtakes you and it's a struggle to pull off the shirt you wore and slip beneath the blankets. As soon as you're settled though, the comfort and warmth of the bed sheets caused you to fall into a deep slumber. You dream of Mingi, thinking about those fantasies but you aren't waking up anytime soon.

Little did you know that Mingi was dreaming of you, trying to relieve his own arousal.

The next day, you wandered into the living room, this time in lace panties and a scantily thin tank top. Your feet pad slowly on the hardwood flooring of the apartment. A small groan came out of you as your feet padded into the kitchen area, your hair a mess, eyes heavy with sleep and your hands worked on the buttons of the small coffee machine to make yourself something to wake up with.

"Oh, Y/N-noona..."

You jumped, yelping, spinning to see Mingi leaning against the wall, his shirt hanging open, his usual black jeans hanging low on his hips, and his brand-name briefs sticking out above them. He was half grinning, eyes trailing your half-naked form before a smirk tugged on his lips.

"Don't mind me. Keep doing what you were doing," he walked towards the kitchen island to grab a cup for himself, not bothering to close his shirt at all.

You stared at him, suddenly unable to form words, only watching him and swallowing heavily as you eyed him up and down shamelessly. How many mornings have you woken to the same view as today? Yes, Mingi walking around shirtless was not uncommon, and yes, you've always tried to not focus too much on the planes and ridges of the muscles. You stood there, your fingers drumming along the counter, unable to turn away and ignoring the burning at the back of your neck as he turned around to face you, meeting your gaze head-on as you met his gaze.

For what seems like hours it's just you standing in front of Mingi, letting his gaze slide over the whole length of your body as you both stand motionless. You finally seem to break and turn around to do the task of preparing yourself some coffee. You are close, so close. The water drips into the little mug and then a shadow envelopes you from behind, heat spreading across your backside, something heavy against your ass.

Instantly you stiffen and turn your head to see Mingi has moved in close behind you, so close that you can feel his warmth and breathe on your neck.

He wasn't touching you, he was holding himself still, and in the beginning, you are unable to detect whether he is purposely pressed up against you or if his tall body is only bent at such an angle that it leaves your butt right underneath him.

When his hands grip the counter at either side of you, your attention focuses on his hold, noting his position is to have the two of you locked into place and that's when you realize how serious Mingi is with his intentions. He hasn't said anything and neither have you, the only sounds that have left the pair of you are your short gasps and sharp intakes of air.

When he rests his chin on your shoulder, the intimate pose has the effects of a powerful drug and your knees go weak. One long breath enters through your parted lips before his hips press into yours and there was no mistaking Mingi's arousal against your back, how stiff and prominent he was. His body is locked into position and there's no escaping.

But do you want to?

"Tell me to leave, and I'll leave," his voice rumbles low with a husky edge to his tone. "Now's your chance."

It's a challenge, a clear dare like he knows full well you don't want him to leave, even though he offers the option to. It's just a question. 

You decide now.

Your eyes drift down. You know that underneath that expensive-looking underwear and his tight, dark-wash jeans, the cock pressing into you is everything you've ever desired. A muscle twitches under the touch of a hand. Another tense, loud swallow, and you manage to glance to your side.

"Mingi?" you breathed out softly, your words barely above a whisper, so silent that the thrumming of blood in your ears was almost overshadowing your words.

"Hmm?" Mingi answered, turning his head a little, his face now mere millimeters away, and the anticipation you feel makes your stomach flip. Your thoughts are clear. The vision in your mind is real. Your senses are acute, and more sensitive than ever. But for whatever reason, words refuse to come to you. It was one of those moments of wanting to speak, knowing what needed to be said but it was a struggle.

Your lashes flutter and before you know it, your lips capture his.

A low groan vibrated in his chest the instant your mouth came into contact, his eyes sliding shut and arms snaked around your middle, pressing you completely back into him. The hand by your hip clutched you as you turned in his hold and pressed your chest fully into his, fingers sliding into his hair.

The feeling of being up against him like this is sending every single part of you into a heightened state and everything he touches sets your skin on fire. It's a tight embrace and when he lifts you effortlessly onto the kitchen counter you immediately wrap your legs around his hips, pulling him as close to you as possible.

Mingi pulls your head back, sliding his tongue into your mouth. You bite down on his bottom lip and his hands roam every single part of you and every curve your body can offer him. The second he pulls away, a single whine leaves you, already missing him, but at the sight of the look in his eyes, all coherent thoughts go out of your head. You stare up at Mingi who is just looking at you with a glint of smugness in his eye that tells you the guy knows what he's doing to you.

"Want to know something, Y/N-noona?" His deep raspy voice has you staring intently into his eyes as his hands glide down and cup your butt, squeezing the plump globes.

"Uh-huh," is your dazed response, followed by a deep breath. The sudden change in Mingi from a moment ago was impressive and honestly sexy. You swallow, staring into his eyes, the tiniest bit of hesitation, nervousness, and anticipation fluttering around in your belly.

"I've been in love with you since I was fourteen," he mutters, staring at you intently, his hands coming around and grasping the edge of your lace panties. "I stopped thinking of you as an older sister. And then every time I look at you, or think about you, my imagination runs wild and sometimes I can't help myself."

And with that his thumbs dip past the lace, stroking the tender skin there.

"O-oh," you bite your lip and curl your fingers, your mind swirling, intoxicated by the desire in his voice and his eyes. His fingers are still moving and Mingi moves forward, closing the gap between you two, lips pressing into the corner of your mouth as your hands come up, resting on the sculpted pecs that send every thought flying from your head. "Thank god because I've had a huge crush on you for a damn long time, Song Mingi."

Mingi let out an amused chuckle, before giving you a heated look, and the next time he pressed his mouth against yours he was no longer timid and gentle. He is more confident and aggressive, more demanding of what he wants, but you welcome it, giving him exactly what he was asking for, not having the will nor strength in you to push him away.

"Tell me where you want me," he says in between breathy pants against your lips, kissing you once more and his tongue slides into your mouth, reaching for every nook, wanting to be inside you in some way.

His actions, his hands stroking, his kiss, his scent surrounding you...everything has your senses, all of them, overwhelmed and your fingers tighten into his hair, a desperate sound escaping you.

"Fuck Mingi...I need you to eat me out," your words make Mingi give a low groan in the back of his throat.

You barely had a moment to catch a breath before his face disappeared downwards, your thighs resting on his shoulders. Mingi pushed the sheer material of your underwear to one side and slid a finger between your wet lips and let out a moan that sent an electric surge throughout you when he touched your aching clit.

You gasped and squirmed and his name left your lips. You're not quite sure whether your gasps were out of embarrassment or how good he feels but the moment you feel Mingi's tongue stroke against you, all thoughts are replaced by pleasure.

"F-fuck, Mingi" you breathed out shakily.

Mingi's lips curled into a smile, making a 'hmm' sound deep in his throat. Every vibration from that only makes you squirm against his lips and the things he was doing to you, his lips and tongue licking you out like you were his favorite flavor, like he wanted nothing more than to have you all to himself. Your moans were the icing on the cake, rewarding him further as you pushed yourself against him and had no other option but to clutch at his hair and beg.

All sorts of needy words and noises fell from your lips as you closed your legs, trapping him between them, and pulled his face deeper into you as Mingi alternated between licking and suckling you. He continued to kiss and suck on you, pressing his lips flat, open, and covering every bit of exposed skin. Your moans had only gotten louder and needier as you felt your release beginning to build up, getting closer and closer to the edge.

Suddenly Mingi stops and the next thing you know, you're thrown over his shoulders, his strong arms gripping the backs of your thighs firmly and keeping you secure. He threw a cheeky grin your way before carrying you off to his bedroom, using one arm to shut the door behind him before dumping you unceremoniously onto his large, soft bed.

The bed itself was so soft you sunk in a little, his silk, blue-colored bed sheets smoothing the action. This wasn't the first time you were in his bedroom, having gone in and borrowed games or clothes that had been left there. 

But this was the first time being in his bed.

"You look really good laying in my bed, noona. You look like you fit right in this spot," he chuckled deeply. "Let's see if we can make this scene look even better."

He pinned you on the bed and captured his lips to yours and your back arched at how amazing the weight of his body was on top of yours. Maybe it was because Mingi was very tall but laying on his bed, with his body pushing you into it felt nice. Not the sensation of being forced down, but the kind of nice where Mingi's scent, his body, everything just melted you.

A moan ripped through your body when his hands palmed you through your thin tank top. They traced every contour they could find.

"Shit," the man hissed. "You've got great tits."

His thumbs swiped back and forth over your nipples and it took less than ten seconds of the combined work of Mingi's mouth and fingers to turn you into a trembling, pleading mess. Mingi licked his lips and then he slid his fingers down to play with the elastic of your lace panties, the back of his fingers brushing lightly over your soft skin and the smirk never left his face.

"Mingi...can I... can I please suck you off?" Your heart was thumping loudly in your chest, heat bloomed all over your entire body and his face was suddenly pulled into a huge, teasing grin as he crawled up towards the head of the bed.

"You wanna taste it, noona?" He asked. "Go ahead then. Show me what you can do with that pretty mouth."

Your eyes couldn't look away from Mingi's as you moved slowly on your knees to follow him as he sat himself against the headboard of his bed. Without hesitation, your fingertips moved to push aside his undone shirt, exposing more of his bare chest. Leaning down to kiss his torso, his abs contracted while he sucked air in. When your lips met the elastic band of his briefs, you looked up and his eyes were completely focused on yours.

"Noona..." he breathed softly, licking his lips at the sight of your doe-like eyes staring up at him. "Look at you. Take what you want, noona. Do what you need. Use my cock as your plaything, doll."

Fuck. He's driving you crazy. 

The thought of having him like this has been a fantasy of yours, not that you had admitted it to yourself until just now, but your dreams are now becoming a reality. You slipped his briefs down, just enough to free him, letting out a hum in satisfaction.

"All for you, noona," Mingi kicked his pants and briefs off, smirking as he spread his legs out for you, wanting you to get closer.

God, Mingi was gorgeous. Not just because of his features but because he had the personality of an amazing man who made his way into the hearts and minds of everyone who met him. And with a body like that, well... who could resist him? No one you know.

Wasting no time, you wrapped your fingers around the base of him, your tongue starting the journey from the thickest section and licking a path from root to tip, sucking his crown between your lips. Your mouth enveloped the first few inches and you hummed when you were rewarded with a low grunt that told you everything your touch was doing for him was satisfactory.

"Noona. What the...how are you...so...good...?" he was at a loss for words, Mingi's sentence left in broken segments when his tongue got tangled. His reaction, however, was music to your ears. He tried to sound put-together, calm, and collected, yet his grunts and groans weren't lost on your ears as you worked him.

He was thick and hard in your hand, growing harder and longer with every bobbing motion your mouth did along his length. There wasn't anything better to hear than the man's own low, heavy groans when you tried deep-throating him or your name whimpered as a low, almost chant when your pace increased. His head dropped back onto the pillows. He was able to just relax and watch, one hand curling softly into your hair.

"You like it, Mingi? My hot, wet mouth on you? You like watching your big dick disappear in my mouth, babe?" you asked.

"So, you do have a dirty side to you, huh?" His low chuckles send pleasant shivers up your spine and cause heat to coil within your abdomen once again. "Fuck, noona...you're so fucking sexy right now. How the fuck can anyone expect me to act sane in front of you? You look so good sucking me like that. Look at me while you're sucking, Y/N-noona."

"You know...I've always fantasized about taking your cock deep in my mouth," you whispered seductively. His eyes met your gaze, watching as you bent and gave the head of his cock a delicate swirl with your tongue.

"Really, now? What else has my naughty Y/N-noona fantasized about, huh?" Mingi's eyes closed and let the bliss that was his imagination take over, biting his lip with a sexy smirk and looking delicious with how laidback he was.

"Mm, many things," you sucked him into the hot cavern of your mouth. You watched Mingi's chest as it rose and fell. "You fucking me, your cock splitting me open. Stuffing me with your cum. Marking me as yours."

With Mingi's eyes half-lidded, his groans are louder, deeper, and longer. The strokes and motions from your mouth bring him to the edge.

"Are you a squirter?" he asked, his eyes peering down, meeting your gaze again. He looks mischievous, and his tone dripped with lust and suggestion. His head tips back, his hips thrust forward as a deep, rumbling growl tore from his throat.

"Why don't you find out? If you think your cock can make me scream loud enough to squirt all over it," you challenged, one eyebrow raised up at him.

"Challenge accepted, noona," his lips twitched upwards in a lascivious smirk and that is when he sat himself up. Gripping the back of your head gently, he was very clear in his instructions. "Now open wide. Be a good noona, and make sure you swallow everything."

Obedient, you did as he asked, parting your lips and ready to taste every drop Mingi offered you, taking it like the good girl you wanted to be for him. And when it finally happened, the salty tang burst against your taste buds, Mingi growling your name and encouraging you to take everything.

"Come here, sweet thing," he growled, reaching out and grasping at the backs of your thighs, pulling them apart until you straddled him. He tugged your panties to the side before lowering you onto his erect cock, slowly so you could adjust to him. "Damn, you look so sexy with your panties pushed aside and stuffed full of me."

Settling yourself on his lap and stuffed full to the hilt, you grabbed the edge of your tank top and lifted it over your head, throwing it somewhere in his room. Mingi groaned at the sight of your fully naked upper body on display to him and he quickly busied himself by reaching out to run his fingertips over your nipples, making you arch into him, gasping at the feeling and your breathing erratic.

You grabbed the headboard of the bed. "Wanna bounce on your cock, Mingi."

His hips instantly jerked against you at those words, groaning as you slowly rolled your hips to get a feel for the movement before finding the speed and rhythm he liked, panting heavily when his head went up so he could focus his attention on your breasts bouncing and his name leaving your lips. Mingi held a strong grip on your sides to help steady your body before you felt his long tongue flick one nipple before wrapping his lips around it.

You were pushing his open shirt off his body so that you could finally admire how beautiful Mingi's body is, so fit and muscular and he let out a happy sound at how eagerly you were trying to touch every inch of him that's exposed to you, how willing he is to let you do as you wish.

"Look at you taking every inch so perfectly," his voice rumbles deeply, almost in a groan. His fingers trailed lightly up your chest, gently cupping your cheek. The tender gesture only lasted mere moments as you began to roll your hips harder, bouncing faster, moving around him, going in circles, grinding up against him. "You like how big my cock is, Y/N? Like the feel of the my cock sliding in and out of your wet pussy? Does my cock hit just the right place?"

"M-mingi..." you squeaked. He feels so thick, so full, all of it deliciously stretching and opening your wet core in ways you didn't know you needed until now.

He takes you without the need of force, every touch and movement filled with patience, and his groans are husk and raspy and deep, and you keep wondering how someone can even be so vocal. Everything Mingi did had you panting for more, pushing for more.

"Love you, Y/N-noona," the male growled, digging his nails slightly into your thighs before letting his palms glide upward and rest on your ass, squeezing and spreading you apart to give him a full view of you. His breathing was quick and his muscles tense. The room was filled with the scent of sex, both of your heavy pants mingling in the air around you as sweat began to glisten both of you.

“Love you too,” you moaned.

Your fingers brushed the top of his shoulders, trailing upwards and into the silky, damp strands of his black locks as you bucked your hips in response, giving him even more depth in your tight core. Mingi continued to gyrate upwards, keeping up the relentless pace you set. He let out an airy groan every few minutes. His body arched towards you. His grunts were desperate, more guttural.

"Fuck, noona," he groaned. "I could watch you ride me for a lifetime."

"M-mingi," you whimpered, letting out a noise when he squeezed your ass cheeks before he dragged a long lick up the valley between your breasts and flicked one pert bud.

"Look at us baby...so good together," Mingi crooned, taking one of your hands and bringing it down to the apex of your bodies, so your fingers brushed against the part where you joined. "Touch yourself, sweet girl. I want us to cum together."

Doing what you were told, you began to rub tight, frantic circles around your clit, and after only a few strokes, a tingle zinged through your pelvis.

"Fuck..." you whimpered, squinting your eyes shut, feeling the knot of pleasure unfurl. “Mingi, I’m going to cum soon.”

"Cum for me," Mingi urged. "Wanna see you fall apart around me."

He gripped your ass and guided you until it was only the head that was left inside you and his deep grunts increased as he slammed back up into your dripping core, deep strokes in and out of you, hitting the perfect place at each stroke. The familiar tightening in your belly returned, growing stronger, building towards an immense climax. Your walls constrict around him, the man moaning with you at how good you feel when he hits his release, coating your walls white.

"F-fuck! Oh shit, oh my god," you yelped, unable to resist, coming undone, squirting all over him as you'd teased and promised, screaming his name loud and unabashed, squeezing him tight, your arms clasping around Mingi's neck. He lets out a husky, broken laugh before collapsing back, dragging you down with him.

"I never would have guessed," Mingi mused breathlessly, stroking the underside of his spent cock while you came back to earth, "That you were a squirter, Y/N-noona. Of all the other surprises about you tonight."

A laugh, somewhere between exhausted and relieved bubbled out of you. "You...are so fucking amazing, Song Mingi."

There is a smile in his voice as he replies. "It's nice hearing that, especially after the kind of mind-blowing sex I just experienced."

Another moment or two and you begin to shift. You wanted, no you had to, clean the mess you made all over Mingi's amazing abs. Moving as if trying to untangle yourself from the tall male. “God, I need to shower.”

"Nope. If you're going, then I'm going," he gave you a quick kiss before looking down at his mattress. "I need to change my sheets anyway. Can't sleep in this bed."

"Pity that," you let out a little laugh before turning into his warm, naked embrace. A blush forming across your cheeks when his hardened length brushes against you. "I was hoping for more."

He pushed your hair aside, your bare back becoming exposed to his dark gaze. Leaning down, he began nipping at your ear. "Maybe..." he began slowly, "We could, y'know, try it in the shower? Maybe in the kitchen, up against the wall... Your bed...?"

"Sounds...wonderful," you moaned softly. "Where do you want to start, big guy?"

His strong arms encircle your waist, his eyes heated with desire. "Wherever you want."

[uofcosmos]

mark bf hcs

sfw

- type to say "babe this one's for you" and miss

- says dude but romantically

- thinks you're his best friend, his gf, his bbg, his everything

- makes you pinky promise him and takes that shit to heart

- thinks you're the funniest person alive

- is always touching you in some form, especially in front of other people

- the type to embarrass you in public and think it's really funny

- sends you every tiktok he sees that he thinks you would even vaguely like

- main form of physical affection: his arm around your shoulder with his arm hanging off of your shoulder and he expects you to hold his hand

- extremely clingy when he's drunk (canonically a lightweight) and if he's out without you he's texting you the entire night

- if you leave the room to get something rq, he just stares at the door until you come back

- biggest yes-man in the world

- if you asked for his opinion on choosing between outfits he would be so stressed cause "babe you look too good in both of them :/"

- if you showed him your eyelash curler and fake lashes he would physically flinch and be so so concerned

- asks you to use them on him so he can experience "the same pain"

- matching social media pfps

- you would catch him thanking god that you're his girl

- likes writing music with you in his lap (says he needs his muse with him all the time)

- starts fantasizing about a future with you on the second date

- go to cuddling: he's on his back and you're on your side using his arm as a pillow

- but he moves around too much in his sleep so you never wake up like that

- HES the rapper gf 

- spontaneously starts beatboxing and rapping about how hot you are and sometimes goes “dude wait… this one’s kinda good i need to write this one down”

- backhugs all the time and cages his arms around you esp when you’re talking to someone else so that he can get your attention 

- paints your nails for you with the utmost concentration (his tongues sticking out and everything) but it’s still messy asf 

- gets flustered when you make sex jokes

nsfw under the cut !! mdni

- also backhugs and starts kissing your neck when he’s horny (it’s his signature move)

- has a sex playlist that consists of solely the weeknd and chase atlantic and plays it religiously when you're fucking

- pleasure dom - gets off on how well you're getting off

- esp the first few times he'd be super stressed about how good he is at giving you head

- when you try to give head the first time he panics and keeps saying you don't have to and asking if you're sure

- finishes in 25 seconds cause he says you just feel too good

- tries to dirty talk once but he starts mumbling it and gives up (never does it again)

- he has such a tiny waist, he's super into it when you grab his waist or back when he's on top of you

- loves it when you put his arms around his neck

- he's really into putting you in odd positions, loves it when your legs are around his waist/shoulders

- mating press

- whiner over groaner

- really into riding, especially when he doesn't have to do too much of the work (he's a busy guy)

- if you came out of the shower and dropped your towel in front of him to walk to the bedroom he's tripping over himself to follow you

- very obvious afterglow, everyone can tell when he's just fucked

- makes really distinct faces when he's fucking

- would try to convince you to let him record your moans to use in the back of his songs (he's half-joking)

- trails kisses down you and is super into eye contact when he does it too

- always needs to see your face when you're fucking

- starts begging way too early when you even think about edging him

- loves when there’s visible scratches on his back so that it’s just a little secret between the two of you 

- every time he tries to edge you and you start whining or getting a little upset he gives in super easily cause he just loves you too much 

- carries you to the shower to clean the both of you off but he never tries anything in there, it's only about you

[crimsonbubble]

*sigh* so I'm a seonghwa bias but this feels more like hongjoong imo. hyper-independent reader who's also never been in a relationship, but she's not naive or innocent, she knows what sex is, but she's never been with anyone. hongjoong is lowkey expecting her to be a brat, he's prepared, ready to deal with it. But!! Once they start exploring their dynamics in the bedroom, reader actually turns out to be the opposite. She's an obedient sub who lives for the praise from her soft dom hongjoong, and he's all too willing to indulge (definitely not projecting, idk what you're talking about) feel free to ignore or change it up, I just saw you were looking for ideas and wanted to share 🙂‍↕️🥰

cw. nsfw, afab!reader, soft dom joong, a lot of praise, fingering, studio sex, mirror sex (but not really, you’ll get what I mean when you read it), sex tape *not proofread, just pure horny

[this is for the praise kink girlies 🙂↕️] my present to yall while I'm away at the ateez concert 🫶🫶

Hongjoong wasn’t expecting this, but god, does he love it.

He adored how easily you melted into him, how you practically glowed after he praised you, how you did everything he asked of you because you knew that he’d reward you well, and how you looked at him with big, shiny eyes and pawed at him when you wanted his attention.

He gave in easily with you too. He simply couldn’t resist you. Not when you’re spread out on his lap in his studio. Not when you mindlessly follow his words, doing what he asks with no hesitation. Hence why Hongjoong has you in his lap, back to his chest, with his phone propped in front of you.

His camera app is open, the small red light on as it records the scene in front of it. Hongjoong laid kisses along your exposed neck, his hands hooking your legs on either side of his. “Always such a good girl for me,” He rubs two fingers over your clothed cunt, smiling against your skin when you shudder. “Sitting so pretty in front of the camera. Yea, are you my pretty girl?” His fingers circled your clit as he continued laying kisses on you.

You flush at his words, leaning back into him as he touches you. Hongjoong scoots his chair back, letting your whole body come into view. He pushes your panties to the side, rubbing his fingers through your slicked folds. He’s aching in his jeans but he can’t stop. Not when you whine so sweetly for him. Normally he’d tut and remove his hands from you when you don’t use your words, but you spent nearly the last hour sitting on his couch while he worked; you were overdue for a reward.

His fingers slide through your folds easily, your arousal only making it easier. You feel your face going hot as you listen to the wet noises your pussy makes as Hongjoong gently spreads your folds. He rubs two fingers over your hole, gently cooing at you to relax for him. “Easy, sweet thing. I’m right here.” He sinks his fingers slowly, shallowly curling his fingers inside your warm walls. “Joongie…” Your voice trails off, leaning into him even more as he starts pumping his fingers.

He presses more kisses to your neck and shoulder, humming softly. “Joongie’s here, don’t worry. Just sit nice and pretty for me, like always, yeah?” his movements gradually picked up in speed, his fingers filling your cunt over and over. He looks over at his phone, moaning into your neck at how your cunt shines under his studio lights. He curls his fingers into your sweet spot, wrapping his free arm around your waist to keep you in his lap.

He watches through the camera as you writhe in his lap. Your thighs are trembling as he pressed his palm flat against your clit, bumping into it with the heel of his palm. He noticed you bite at your lips trying to muffle your moans. He whispers calmly against the shell of your ear. “C’mon pretty, let me hear you.” The indirect permission to be loud struck a chord in your head as you came undone around his fingers.

Your pussy pulsed against his hand as he rocked you through your orgasm. “My good girl, can take one more for me, right? Make a mess on my fingers again, right baby?” You dumbly nod, smiling as you take in his form in his camera.

“Hm, my good girl. So sweet for me. C’mon then, show me how good you are.”

[mypoisonedvine]

𝐬𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐤 | angus tully x reader (series finale)

read 𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐲 and 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐞𝐫 first!

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 | angus has been waiting to see you again, but the more feelings get involved, the more complicated your affair becomes.

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 | 7k

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 | SMUT (18+ only!!), mega angst but also fluff too, infidelity, boring old people parties, reader is still emotionally constipated and angus still has a breeding kink, but that's honestly it it's just a bunch of emotions so strap in folks!

Angus was pretty sure he broke some kind of record, with how quickly he ran back to his room after talking to you on the payphone.

He was sure that was exactly what you were picturing him doing— he’d made it pretty clear what he’d do once you hung up, and you’d made it pretty difficult to do anything else with the way you were talking.  You’d been winding him up on purpose, of course; so yes, you could easily imagine him making a mad dash to his room and slamming the door— if you really ever thought about him outside of those phone calls.

That was the thing Angus couldn’t figure out about you.  Well, there were probably a lot of other things than that, but it was the quandary he spent the most time pondering: does she think about me?

Whenever he mustered the courage to ask you something to that effect, you would either change the subject or give a half-answer.  Something about how you had a dream about him the other night or how your parents asked about him— never what he was really asking.

But, frankly, at that moment as he shut his dorm room door and jumped into bed, whether or not you thought about him much was not as pertinent an issue.  Right then, all he could think about was getting his hand around his raging boner; his mind was just playing everything you’d said to him over the phone on repeat.

I’m touching myself right now, you’d whispered in a sultry voice, I’m so wet, Angus— fuck, I’m so wet…

He’d never had to work so hard to keep a straight face on the phone before… he figured if anyone was really looking, they’d notice how red he was turning or how he kept shifting uncomfortably.  And he told you just as much, which of course only encouraged you.  Don’t want them to know, huh? you’d taunted. Don’t want the other boys to find out you’re listening to me get off?

And no, he didn’t— you were such a precious thing, the boys here didn’t even deserve to imagine you— but when you offered to stop if it was too distracting, he only found himself shakily begging for more.

As he quickly opened his khaki pants and gripping his cock, he hissed through his teeth; his ego could barely take all you’d said about that cock, about how thick and ‘perfect’ (you used that exact word, perfect, and he thought he might float) it was, about how you wished you could come around it right then instead of your fingers.

“It’s all yours,” he mumbled to himself, under his breath, not even really noticing he was saying it aloud.  “You want it, baby?  It’s all fucking yours.”

He groaned as he stroked himself, the precum that had been leaking from his tip for a while making everything even easier.  Shutting his eyes tight, he pictured you, like he always did: all of you, everything, anything he could remember.

You ever think about me? you’d asked him over the phone— and he’d blurted out his always before he even realized you meant while he was getting off.  It was still true, but more specific than necessary.  He craved to hear you say it: I think about you too.  But he didn’t ask, and you just went back to moaning while you rubbed your clit— which, apparently, was already swollen and throbbing— and, well, he wasn’t strong enough to interrupt that.

“Fuck,” he grunted, deep in the back of his throat, finally letting his pace pick up until his hand was a blur: after all that anticipation and all that waiting, there was no use trying to hold back now.  It wasn’t like you were here to worry about him coming too fast, even though you’d still maintained you found it endearing when it happened.

He repeated your voice in his head, the moment that had made him worry he would blow his load in his trousers before he could even get off the phone and back to his room: I’m gonna come for you, you’d warned him in the most beautiful moaning voice, Angus— I want you so bad, oh god— I’m gonna come for you, fuck…

His lip caught between his teeth, his hips rocked up into his own palm.  “Yes, fuck, baby,” he panted, “I— fuck!”

He tried to conjure in his mind how it had felt to come inside you, but he knew even his vivid imagination could never really capture the feeling; nothing could even come close.  Still, remembering it and letting himself indulge in his strangest fantasies for just a moment sent him over the edge.  His face flushed suddenly as he came in long, heavy pulses, the back of his free hand falling over his open mouth yet doing little to suppress his moans.

It was intense— it was certainly better than his orgasms usually were when brought on by himself— but it only satisfied him for a moment.  The moment he was finished, with a deep breath in and his hips relaxing back down onto the mattress, he wanted more— he wanted you.

His heavy eyes glanced to the side, trying to remember what it felt like to lie next to you.  He’d never felt lonely after jerking off before he met you; now getting off seemed to bring a new wave of heartbreak each time.

When he shook off the thought and looked down at himself, he frowned as he realized he’d ruined his own shirt doing that— not that he could fully bring himself to regret it.

No, his regrets only really began a few weeks later, when the nagging loneliness in the back of his mind finally got the better of him.

It was the middle of the night when he wrote it, after he woke up from a dream of you that he just couldn’t shake from his mind.  After checking that his roommate was fast asleep, Angus carefully slipped out of bed and tip-toed to the desk, and pulling out a box of cards and envelopes from one of the drawers.  (He thought he’d never use them when his mom sent them with him at the beginning of the year, but a lot had changed since then.)

Something about the ungodly hour made him more honest— or maybe just more shameless.  He wrote a frantic ramble, everything he’d wanted to say to you that he’d never had the courage to blurt out over the phone; all the feelings he’d felt since that incredible night in the backseat of your car, which he’d assumed would fade… which he’d tried to convince himself would fade.

Unfortunately, even the adrenaline of writing down the thoughts of you he’d been poring over for over a month wasn’t enough to overpower exhaustion: he awoke the next morning slumped over the desk, the pen still uncapped and fallen a few inches from his hand, the letter left folded open.

He awoke to the sound of someone’s door shutting down the hall, specifically; jumping and blinking quickly, he looked at the window— it was morning, though still quite early— and then at his roommate who was, thank god, still asleep.

Angus looked back at the letter in front of him, only making out a few words in his brief glance, before his cheeks began to heat up and he quickly folded it shut.  As more footsteps moved through the hall, the boy in the bed nearby stirred and grumbled to himself, and Angus quickly snatched up the letter and shoved it in his book bag before he was caught red-handed.

Ironically, that little commotion was what actually got the other boy’s attention.  “What are you doing at the desk?” he asked groggily, rubbing one of his eyes with the back of his palm.

“Oh, I, uh— I had to do some late night cramming,” Angus explained nervously, “that big Geography test coming up and all…”

The half-awake boy seemed to notice for a moment that the story didn’t really make sense, on account of the empty desk, but he simply shrugged and tossed his blanket aside to get up as well.

For the rest of the day, Angus couldn’t think straight— and not just because of his mediocre rest and achy back from the absolutely terrible sleep posture he’d had.  He couldn’t stop thinking about the letter, even if he honestly couldn’t remember for certain everything he’d said… he couldn’t stop wondering if he should send it to you.  He almost didn’t want to read it again first— he wanted you to read it in its most authentic state, he wanted to mail it before he chickened out just like he had when you said you two could just stay casual.  Even if it made his heart race and his palms especially clammy, Angus decided in the middle of that goddamned Geography test that he was going to mail that letter tonight after dinner: he was finally just going to man up and tell you.

Of course, something went horribly wrong along the way: he made a fatal mistake.  Looking back on it, he couldn’t tell for certain if his mistake was falling for you in the first place, or writing the infamous letter, or shoulder-checking Kountze without holding on tight enough to his bag.

The argument that happened beforehand was petty and forgettable, even if it gathered a small crowd of Kountze’s friends, but it ended with Angus trying to walk away a tad… aggressively, and with Kountze grabbing him by the strap of his bag which not only knocked Angus off-balance but spilled the contents onto the floor of the dorm’s shared room.

Everyone saw the books and papers hit the ground; everyone saw the off-white cardstock land right on top.  Angus reached for the letter quickly, but Kountze beat him there, and held it back with a snicker.

“Well, well,” Kountze tutted proudly, “what’s this?”

“H-hey, don’t read that,” Angus warned, hoping the seriousness of his tone would somehow affect the other boy— but, obviously, it did not.  Kountze started to open it and Angus instantly made a dive for it, only to be stopped by three other students who apparently were curious as well about the letter.  “Don’t fucking read that!” Angus demanded.

“Oh god, it’s to a girl!” he realized.  “Do you have a girlfriend, Tully?”

“I swear to god, Kountze, if you fucking read that—”

“I miss you,” Kountze began to read aloud as Angus thrashed around to try to stop him, “I miss you so much I don’t even know what to say.”

The boys holding Angus back were enraptured as Kountze read the letter; “Do you guys pay this much attention in class?” he mocked them, though they were ignoring him completely as they waited for the other boy to keep reading.

“I feel like I can’t breathe without you— aw, Tully, you’re a poet,” Kountze mocked with a smile.  Angus’ heart raced as he remembered what part of the letter came next.  “Not a day goes by where I don’t think about you and your smile— Jesus, this is some really sappy shit— or what it’s like talking with you for hours, or how it feels—”

He stopped, and Angus froze, and after a moment the group of boys started demanding the conclusion.  “What— what does it say?!” “Read it, Kountze!”

“How it feels to be inside you,” Kountze continued with wide eyes, staring at Angus’ bright red face as the other boys began to react loudly.

Angus renewed his struggle against the kids holding him back, but even though he was taller than them, he was severely outnumbered.  “Stop— that’s personal!” Angus demanded to no avail.

“I don’t know how I’m supposed to go back to my hand after having you,” Kountze continued with a laugh.  “From what I hear from your roommate, Tully, your hand is treating you just fine.”

“Shut up,” Angus hissed, but his words had lost their bite as his humiliation grew.

“I should’ve told you before I left—” he started, but finally Angus found some new strength within himself to shake off the boys holding him back: he dove at Kountze and took him down, scrambling to snatch the card away.  He was going to be satisfied with just that, but of course Kountze still had to open his mouth, even when Angus had him pinned.  “Jesus, Tully,” he scoffed, “how ugly is this chick that you got her to sleep with you?”

Angus brought a fist swiftly down to Kountze’s nose, who groaned in pain and held his face as Angus got up and ran away.  The other boys let him pass, thankfully, and Angus wasted no time getting to his room and slamming the door behind him.

Defiantly wiping a tear from his cheek, Angus took a quick look at the letter— wrinkled, stained and scuffed from the fight with Kountze— and crumpled it up, tossing it into his wastebasket before throwing himself onto his bed and hiding his head under the pillow.

He was stupid to even write it, let alone consider sending it; it was no use, you obviously didn’t feel the same way about him that he did about you.  You were the one who said it should just be what it was— a fling.  But Angus felt like he’d been flung directly into hell, the way it tore into his chest to imagine you didn’t really want him.

Even if he never read the letter again that day, he remembered how it ended— and it was the part he couldn’t get out of his mind even when he wanted more than anything to forget it all.

Is this what love feels like?

//

It reminded you a lot of that dinner over Christmas break, except somehow, it seemed like he was staring at you even more.  Shouldn’t he have gotten that out of his system a bit by now?

But then again, maybe you should’ve been more used to it, since it had been over an hour of picking away at this quail dinner, and he’d barely taken his eyes off of you.  Something about him looked different; it was basically impossible that he could’ve visibly aged in just a couple months, and yet he seemed like he was carrying just a bit more age on those thin shoulders.  Maybe it was just the slight five-o-clock shadow over his jaw— but, no, there was a different look in his eyes, too—

Realizing you were, in fact, staring back at him, you quickly snapped your gaze back down to your plate.

You’d been wanting a chance to talk to him before this dinner, to hopefully prevent exactly this issue, but once the dinner ended you found yourself avoiding him.  Of course you weren’t ready to talk to him— of course you had a million thoughts in your head and half of them didn’t even make sense.

For once, you actually tried to talk to all of your parents’ snooty friends, repeating the same answers over and over about how you were going to graduate school in the fall and how you were looking forward to your family’s Paris trip in the summer and all that jazz.  It was worth it to keep Angus off your back for a moment, even if you could still feel his eyes boring into said back from time to time.

Midway through a mind-numbingly boring conversation (if something so one-sided could be called a conversation) with the Gordons about renovations they’d done on their summer house, you glanced around the room over your shoulder and noticed that Angus was apparently absent.  His parents were still there, sitting on a couch— that is, his mom and stepdad— so he couldn’t be far, but out of view he was far enough.  Figuring he’d gone to the kitchen or the restroom, you figured it was the perfect time to disappear into the downstairs bedroom and, hopefully, hide out for the rest of the party.  Excusing yourself quickly, you made a polite dash for the other end of the room.

And yet, somehow, he appeared out of thin air; as you turned down the hallway, only a dim lamp on an antique credenza lighting your way, you heard Angus’ hushed voice behind you.  He laid his hand on your shoulder, and the moment you turned to face him, he was on you— his weight pressed you into the wall and you felt trapped in a way that was annoyingly pleasant.

“God, I missed you,” he breathed, kissing you hard and sudden; you whimpered a little, nearly melting into it, before you pushed him back at his shoulders.

“A-Angus, wait,” you sighed.  “You, um… you didn’t call for a while.”

“Oh,” he mumbled, “um, I’m sorry— I just got busy with midterms and stuff— but I really wanted to!”

He moved like he was about to kiss you again, but you kept your hand on his chest to keep him away.  “I wanted to tell you…” you trailed off.

“Tell me what?”

“You remember Brian Stevenson?” 

“Oh— um, yeah, I guess so,” Angus frowned a little, clearly confused by what seemed like a non sequitur.  “I used to go over to his house when I was little, although it was just to play with his little brother, but… yeah, I remember him.”

“I’ve been sorta, y’know�� going with him,” you explained, hesitantly meeting Angus’ gaze just in time to see the most terrible sadness cover his face.

“O-oh,” he choked out, quickly stepping back from you and shoving his hands in his pockets.

“Yeah…” you mumbled, twisting your loafer-clad foot on the carpet nervously.  “It’s just, you know, he asked me out a couple weeks ago, and ever since then—”

“So is he, like, your boyfriend?” Angus pressed.  You nodded.  He looked away.  “Right— that’s… cool.  That’s cool.”

You bit your lip slightly, hating that he wouldn’t look at you all of a sudden.  “Angus, it’s just that, you know, we said—”

“Right,” he interrupted sharply.  “Right, I remember what we said— what you said, that we weren’t— you know.  That it wasn’t anything.”

“I didn’t say that—” you tried to correct him.

“You said you were mine,” he added suddenly, making your eyes widen.  “Did you even mean that?”

“I— Angus, come on,” you laughed nervously.  “That’s… that’s just something people say…”

He scoffed, and looked to the side as he pushed his tongue against the inside of his cheek; contempt looked sort of good on him, you thought, except that it was directed at you.  He was trying to hide it, but his eyes were watering.

“I’m sorry,” you began but he cut you off right away.

“No, don’t do that,” he shook his head quickly, crossing his arms and staring down at the floor.  “Don’t lie to me anymore.”

“No— I really am,” you tried to assure.

“Hey, it’s fine,” he insisted sharply.  “It’s— you know, it is what it is.  It was just one of those things.”

“If it’s fine, then look at me,” you pleaded.  He didn’t.  And for a long moment, the two of you stood there, still and silent.

“It’s fine,” he repeated softly, turning on his heel.

“Angus, wait,” you hissed, not wanting to raise your voice with all the guests not too far away— of course, it was fruitless, and he briskly blended back in with the crowd.

Sighing, you dropped your head into your hands.  That wasn’t how you ever wanted this to go, you never wanted to hurt him; honestly, you’d assumed he’d be irritated, but not… sad.  Not devastated.  Of course he would prefer to be getting laid, but you figured he wouldn’t have too much trouble finding some other girl to screw around with— sometimes, you’d wondered if he already had.

It was supposed to be easy, it was supposed to be casual, it was supposed to be fun.  You couldn’t think of anything you’d ever done, or anything you’d ever felt, that was less fun than this.

//

It made a strange sort of sense that the next time you saw him was at another party.  Of course, this party was entirely different from the last one: for one, it was hosted by your boyfriend, and there sure as hell wasn’t any quail.  There was a lot more alcohol, though.

You were hanging off to the side, not feeling quite up for mixing in with the crowd as they danced to the record Brian had put on.  Even if they spared you from the same boring questions that your parents’ friends bombarded you with, they were uninteresting in their own way as every conversation seemed to come back to politics or pot.

Brian startled you a bit by coming up beside you, resting his hand on the small of your back.  “Hey,” he greeted, and you smiled up at him.  Your eyes lingered on his face— he looked… grown up.  It was probably just because he had a beard; he certainly didn’t always act grown up, but overall, Brian was perfectly acceptable.  He’d asked you out, he’d actually had the bravery for that, so that was a great head start.

You tried to shake the thought out of your mind, looking away from him; it wasn’t a head start because this wasn’t a race.  Who, after all, would he be racing against?

For some reason, your eyes turned to the front door— and you bit your lip as you saw Angus coming inside, slipping off his coat and looking around the room (for you, presumably).  He looked even more haggard than before: a little pale, eyes sunken and dark, and he definitely hadn’t shaved since you saw him.

Brian looked to find where you were staring, and frowned slightly.  “Who’s that?” he asked.

“Oh, um— Angus Tully, his parents are friends with mine, I used to babysit him when he was a kid.”

You knew that wasn’t really what he was asking, so you weren’t surprised when he got to the point more directly: “What’s he doing here?”

“I don’t know,” you shrugged, hoping Brian wouldn’t somehow figure out that your heart was racing.

Brian’s hand moved up to your shoulder and gave it a squeeze, just as Angus noticed you and hurriedly shoved his way through the crowd to come face-to-face with you.

“Hey, can I talk to you for a second?” he asked, his voice raspy and hurried as he took a quick glance at Brian in his peripheral.

“Um— sure,” you agreed awkwardly, not sure which answer would be less suspicious.  Of course, when you glanced at Brian, he just looked mildly annoyed— bored, even.  You realized in that moment that you didn’t need to worry about him suspecting you and Angus of anything, because he barely registered Angus’ existence: he certainly wouldn’t acknowledge him as some kind of sexual threat.

“Privately,” Angus added— and that actually got Brian’s attention, though he seemed more aware of your discomfort than anything.

“Anything you wanna say to her, you can say in front of me,” Brian assured firmly, and Angus swallowed anxiously— it was obvious from the bob of his Adam’s apple.

“Actually, uh, somebody was looking for you out front,” Angus told him.  “Something about a keg getting delivered to the wrong house?”

“Shit,” Brian hissed, dropping his hand from your shoulder and looking towards the door again.  “Fucking idiots…”

Having made quick work of Brian, Angus put his attention back on you.  “Let’s go outside,” he suggested.

“W-we can just talk here,” you tried to say, but he was already grabbing your wrist and guiding you out; why did your heart still skip when he touched you?

Once he’d taken you through the kitchen and out to the back porch— where you could still hear the music and chatter, but it was much quieter— you spoke.

“Angus, I really am sorry about— you know— but you can’t just—” you started.

“It’s not over yet,” he insisted, surprising you with his intensity; you leaned back against the wooden railing, and he stood just a little too close with those dark brown eyes piercing through you.

“If you tell me you’re happy with Brian, I’ll leave you alone,” Angus decided, puffing up his chest a bit.

“I’m happy with Brian,” you said sternly.

A brief moment passed.  “Okay, I lied,” Angus admitted.

“Jesus,” you hissed.

“But only because I don’t believe you!” he explained.  “We were so good together.”

“Yeah, we were,” you admitted, “but… it’s over now.”

“No— it’s not.  It can’t be!” he insisted with a whine, and you scoffed as you shook your head.

“Angus, you’re being childish,” you scolded.

“Oh, don’t say that,” he grimaced.  “Don’t hold that against me— I’m not stupid, you know.”

“Of course you’re not— but you’re not thinking clearly.”

“Damn right I’m not!” he spat.  “You’re all I could think about, for months!  Months, I couldn’t fucking get you out of my head!  And not just the, you know, the dirty stuff— everything.  Every moment I spent with you, every dumb thing we talked about for hours, every time you laughed at one of my shitty jokes—”

“Angus, please,” you breathed, glancing down; you could only take so much of this, and you worried he was figuring that out.

“Does he make you laugh?” Angus pressed, stepping a bit closer to you.  “Does he make you feel special?  Does he make you come?”

“Yes,” you said sharply, “he’s great, okay?  I’m happy— so please just stop fucking this up for me.”

“Okay, fine,” he conceded, “you’re happy, I believe you.  But… but what about me, y’know?  He doesn’t need you like I do.”

Your face warmed up and you crossed your arms tighter, staring down at the ground.

“Of course he likes you— who wouldn’t?  But he couldn’t even imagine how I feel about you— how long I’ve been thinking about you.  I mean, I’ve wanted you since I was a kid!  You’re my dream girl!”

“That’s— that has nothing to do with me,” you tried to explain.  “That’s a fantasy!”

“But it’s real, baby,” he sighed, bringing his hands up to gently hold your arms at either side.  “It’s so real, you know it is.”

You didn’t even have the heart to deny it— or to tell him not to call you that.  You knew if you looked up at him, you wouldn’t be able to fight him anymore; he must’ve known that, too, because he delicately lifted your chin until you met his gaze.

And then he kissed you: tender, sweet, and shameless.  He didn’t care if anyone saw, if anyone knew— even Brian.  You, on the other hand, still cared enough to try to stop him; but even you couldn’t resist a kiss like this, and you found your hands pulling him closer as quickly as they’d tried to push him away.

He took you home, without another word about what this meant or where you stood with each other.  You snuck him into your room and he climbed into bed with you and he touched you like he’d been waiting a lot longer than just a few months for this moment.  Frankly, you were beginning to realize that you’d been waiting a lot longer for this, too.

Before, Angus had always been talkative during sex— sometimes annoyingly so.  But this time, he didn’t say a damn thing; neither of you did.  And yet, somehow, just by the way he looked at you, just by the way he held you, just by the way he moved inside you... you felt like you heard more than you ever had.

//

You sat next to each other on the bench, staring forward into the dark treeline ahead— there was still a layer of frost around their roots, and a new snow had begun to fall even if it wasn’t cold enough for it to stick on the pavement.  You tried not to look at him too long, in case it made this any harder, but you did appreciate that he seemed a bit more put together than he had the last time you went a few days without seeing him.  He was clean-shaven, too… is it wrong that you kinda missed the stubble?

“Thanks for, you know… giving me a couple days to think about it,” you mumbled, and he nodded.

“I thought you might have somewhere better to be on a Friday night,” he said— trying to lighten the mood a bit, you could tell; trying to make you comfortable.

“Well, even if I did, I think this needs to be done,” you explained, and he pressed his lips together a bit.

He waited patiently, though, for you to break the silence and explain yourself, even if he didn’t seem too surprised when you did it.

“It was a mistake,” you decided.  “It was great, but it was a mistake— and I’d really appreciate if we could just… let it go.  And if you didn’t tell Brian.”

“Okay,” he nodded slowly.  “I wasn’t gonna tell him.  But I still think you should dump him.”

“Well, that’s my decision,” you reminded him, crossing your arms.

“I know,” he breathed.

You could already tell, just by the way the next silence began, that he was going to interrupt it with something stupid… you just never expected how stupid.

“The thing is— I love you,” he blurted out suddenly, turning to look at you again as your eyes widened.  “I fucking love you.”

“Angus, I— you can’t—!” you choked out, but he continued before you could try to think of a response.

“I know I do— don’t say I don’t know what that is, or that I’m too young or something stupid like that,” he pleaded.  “I know how I feel, okay?  When you miss somebody this much, when you think about somebody this much— what else could love be, but that?”

You sighed, looking away, and he moved closer to you on the bench.  Even if you knew it was preposterous that someone else would be in the park at the end of the street at this time of night, you still fought the urge to look over your shoulder.

“Don’t tell me I’m crazy,” he breathed.  “You love me too, don’t you?  I mean— I thought you basically forgot I existed, but last night… that sort of thing doesn’t just happen, does it?  It’s not… it’s not usually like that.”

“No, it’s not,” you admitted, “that was different.”

He perked up, smiling wide when you looked at him again.  “Just say it,” he begged, “say you love me too— ‘cause I know you do.”

“I— Angus, it’s more complicated than that,” you explained.  “We’re still— there’s Brian, for one thing… we can’t really go on like this, you know that.”

“I know— I don’t want to keep doing this.  I want to really be together,” he replied.  You tried to turn your body away from his slightly, but he grabbed your hands and held them tight until you looked at him again.  “I’m almost done with high school— I’ll go to college where you’re going for grad school!”

You shook your head.  “No, you can’t do that.”

“Just think about it: us, together— we could actually go on real dates, and go to college parties together, and, like, study out at the library— or, you know, whatever you college kids do,” he fantasized.  You smiled, but shook your head again.

“We… we can’t do that,” you denied.

He frowned, and turned away from you, staring darkly at the ground.  “I knew it,” he mumbled, shaking his head.  “You’re embarrassed— you’re ashamed of me.”

“What?!” you blurted out.  “Angus, no—”

“It’s okay,” he said in a terribly unconvincing way, crossing his arms.  “I don’t blame you: I’m just some dumb kid from your hometown.  You want a guy your age— not some random freshman… you want something better.”

“That’s bullshit,” you replied instantly, “you can do so much better.”

“C’mon, I’ll never do better than you,” he insisted.

Even though he’d misunderstood you, your heart still swelled a bit at the compliment.  “I meant for college, Angus,” you explained, and he deflated a little.  “You can do a lot better than a state school.”

“Well, I, um… I don’t know if I can,” he admitted nervously.  “My grades are kinda… inconsistent.  And I went to so many different high schools—”

“Who gives a shit?” you scoffed.  “You’re fucking smart— way smarter than anybody else here.  You act like an idiot sometimes, but you’re eighteen, it kinda comes with the territory.”

He frowned, but couldn’t exactly deny it.

“You deserve to go somewhere amazing,” you told him.  “You need to go somewhere amazing— and do something amazing.”

For a long moment, he just stared out into the dark; until, suddenly, he whipped his head back around at you with a quizzical look on his face.  “Wait— is that what this is all about?”

“What?”

“Do you not want to be with me because you think you’d, like, hold me back or something?” he accused.

You blinked quickly; something about the way he said be with me caught you off-guard— like it was a term much more mature than you had expected from him.  Instead of answering directly, you just stammered.  “Well, y-you’re young, and—” 

He cut you off quickly with a laugh.  “Oh my god!  You think I give a shit about that?”

“No,” you shot back, “but you should.  You realize how fucking dumb it would be to change your whole life for the first person you ever slept with?”

“When you put it like that, it sounds dumb,” he admitted, looking down at his feet swinging over the edge.  “But what if it’s somebody that, you know, you think you really have a shot with?  What if it’s somebody that you feel like you can’t live without?  Somebody that makes you finally get all those songs you hear on the radio—”

“It only feels like this to you because you’ve never felt anything else,” you explained gently.  “It’s your first love.  It fades.”

“But I don’t want it to,” he said instantly, looking at you with the most heartbreaking eyes you’d ever seen.  “God, I don’t want it to.”

You looked up at him as his hand brushed over your face, and felt tears welling before you could fight them off; he kissed you, in a way that you thought he might have never really kissed you before.  In a way nobody had kissed you before, in fact.  It wasn’t very long, but it felt like it might as well have gone on forever.

When he broke away, he kept his eyes shut, and he pressed his forehead to yours as his thumb stroked your cheek.  “Tell me it doesn’t have to end,” he breathed, “please.  Tell me it’s not going to end.”

“It has to,” you whispered back, watching his shoulders sink and bringing your hand up to clutch at his chest.  “It has to end, someday.”

You took a shaky breath, watching a tear fall from his jaw onto your arm, feeling everything you’d held back finally breaking through as your grip on shirt tightened and your lip began to quiver.

“But it doesn’t have to be tonight,” you sighed.

Gasping with relief and joy simultaneously, he kissed you again, and pulled you closer at your waist, and wrapped you up in his arms tightly.

There was, of course, this nagging voice at the back of your mind— that maybe it didn’t have to end.  And god, you wanted to silence that thought permanently if you could, because it had never done you any good.  That hope had only ever led to pain before.  But, without it, nothing would ever really have a chance: if you weren’t willing to risk the heartache, you’d never let yourself love Angus the way that he deserved and the way that you knew, deep down, you already did.

So, as he kissed you that way you thought people only kissed in movies, and whispered to you those words you thought people only said because they were poets and dreamers, you realized that maybe it didn’t have to end someday.  Maybe he would spend the next several years of your lives convincing you that you didn’t need to protect yourself from your own feelings.  Maybe he would actually have the patience to break down walls he never built, to fix wounds he didn’t leave.  Maybe he was ready to give you something to believe in, something worth taking risks for while you were still young and reckless.  Maybe he, like the oncoming equinox, would melt your ice so new life could grow.

Or, maybe, this feeling he had really would fade once he gained a little more life experience; maybe you would make too many mistakes for him to forgive.  Maybe you would always be friends, or maybe you would have too much history to be able to see each other again.  Maybe you would grow apart— maybe you would have to brace yourself for that, to sit next to him on a cold dorm room mattress as you both realized it just wasn’t working anymore.

The most important thing that you realized in that moment— that eternal moment in his arms, in the dark, in the last snow of Spring— was that it didn’t matter.  It didn’t have to be forever to be perfect; it didn’t have to be the ending to be beautiful.  He loved you.  Even if you were still trying to figure out why, he loved you; and that was true, and real, and special.  His love couldn’t fix you, but it made you feel fixable, and you hadn’t seen yourself that way in a long time— you could only dream that you might see yourself the way he saw you.

When you pulled back from the kiss for a moment, you smiled wide— you laughed, actually— and sniffled as he wiped your tears away.  “I love you,” you told him, and even though he kissed you again, you didn’t stop saying it.  You wanted to keep it on your lips until it didn’t scare you anymore; you wanted to keep your heart open, even if it made you vulnerable, maybe because it made you vulnerable.  After all, you couldn’t ever be sure it wouldn’t come back to bite you… if you could, it wouldn’t mean anything.

Even though all you said to him was I love you, each one meant something a bit different.  I trust you.  I’m not sure I’m ready, but I’m going to try.  I’m sorry.  I’m so glad I met you.  I’ll never forget you.  Please don’t let me go.

Somehow, you felt like he heard each one.  Each time he told you that he loved you, though, you heard the same thing: I won’t let you go, ever.

//

Easter Mass was relatively pleasant, if a little too long.  You did notice Angus sitting with his family, across the aisle and a few rows back, but you only gave him a quick wave before the service started and managed to resist glancing back at him after that.

The best part of Easter was always afterwards, though: you stood at the furthest end of the lawn, in front of the ivy-covered exterior wall of the chapel, as children ran around snatching up colorful eggs to collect for their baskets.  Even if it was totally stupid, and irrelevant to the actual message of the holiday that the priest had just spent the whole service hammering in, you got a kick out of the fancy clothes and tiny dress shoes, the squeals of delight, the candy and toys in bright pastels.  You were just thankful the weather had warmed up in the nick of time for all the festivities— indoor egg hunts never have quite the same effect.

Angus sauntered up beside you, sipping on a styrofoam cup of complimentary coffee, and you didn’t even look at each other, but you both smiled.

“They’re cute,” he stated after a little while.

“Yeah,” you agreed.

“Do you wanna have a kid?” he asked, and you gave him a hesitant glance only to find him looking right back at you— his expression was friendly, but neutral enough that you couldn’t read if he meant having a kid with him or just, you know, in general.

Deciding it must be the second one, you let out a soft, nervous laugh.  “Uh, I dunno… maybe someday,” you offered, as non-committal as possible.

“How about right now?” he challenged, lowering his voice slightly, but not enough to stop you from glancing around to make sure nobody heard.

“Angus, fucking Christ,” you coughed.  “Don’t joke about that.”

“I’m not,” he shrugged.  “I mean, maybe I’m not being literal, but that doesn’t mean I’m not being serious.”

“Well… we can’t,” you mumbled, looking out at the lawn again, hoping not to stand out too much.  “Not here.”

“I know, I know,” he agreed, and the two of you fell back into a silence— an oddly comfortable one, even.  You crossed your arms as you watched the kids run around and he kept sipping on his coffee.  After a few moments, though, you spoke again.

“Meet you in the Sunday school room in the West wing in five minutes?”

“Yup,” he said, already turning to leave.  You smiled slightly to yourself, glancing down at your white shoes planted in the grass.  Even on such a delicately-manicured lawn, wildflowers were already springing up— little periwinkle diamonds scattered here and there.

When what felt like a reasonable amount of time passed, you made your careful and casual exit from the egg hunt to slip back inside.  Once you were away from the crowds and on your way to meet Angus, you couldn’t stop yourself from running… and you couldn’t stop yourself from smiling, either.

[zhongfile]

something’s missing. — Lee Donghyuck

PAIRING. haechan x fem reader

GENRE. smut

WARNINGS. blackmailing, dubcon themes, unprotected sex, crying, slapping, oral, degradation, forced breeding, stalking of socials, non-consented recording. big d!ck haechan agenda.

WC. 2.1K

A/N: miss the dreamies so bad it got me writing again😪 please enjoy this smut that i’ve been working on for a while that only @2cupids has known about LOL. feedback is so highly appreciated it’s been so long!! proof read but not rly oops. hope you enjoy:’)

Haechan scoffed when he viewed your story. Jealousy washing over his body when he saw you kissing another man on the cheek. the caption reading happy one month with a pink heart emoji. “Unbelievable” he mumbled to himself, tossing his phone. Surely you were only posting that to make him upset right?

You and haechan parted ways a long time ago. Two years ago to be exact haechan still believing you loved him and only moved on to get a reaction out of him. Which.. wasn’t true. You stopped worrying about haechan the day you two broke up. Threatening to get a restraining order made him back off a little, giving you the chance to call the quits. Haechan tried to rationalize with you saying he couldn’t live without you and wanted to remain good friends even if you two weren’t together anymore. You were easy to manipulate though that quickly came to an end.

Your ‘friendship’ lasted maybe a good week before you stopped returning his phone calls and blocked him on everything. Now here you are two years later in a happy relationship, new friends, and even a better job. Haechan hasn’t even crossed your mind since you’ve been with Jake, finally feeling safe in a relationship for once.

Haechan on the other hand still kept tabs on you. Though you blocked him and all his friends he still had an old burner account he used to stalk your socials. He was happy to see you happy but hated that it wasn’t him being there for you and all your new accomplishments. He hated seeing you under another man. He hated that you were purposely posting all this to make him jealous. To make him react this way.

He shakes his head, smacking his dry lips together, how could you just move on that easily?

Haechan had to think of a way to get you back into his life again.

You laid your head on your boyfriend's chest as you slowly began to drift off to sleep. Your phone buzzed ignoring the first two times it went off getting up to check it the third time it buzzed. The number that texted you was a number you didn't save or recognize, figuring someone just had the wrong number. Your eyes went wide at the three video attachments of you fucking haechan and giving him head. ‘Why does he still have these?’ You asked yourself. Your heart sank at the following messages. He found you yet again.

Unknown: Remember these?

Unknown: Oh how I miss you and your tongue. I still watch these videos to get myself off

Unknown: come on y/n don’t ignore me :((

Unknown: maybe i should send these videos to jake huh? show him how much fun we used to have.

You froze at the text.. How did he know who Jake was?

You: please delete those videos haechan. seriously please

Unknown: look who finally decided to reply!

Unknown: come over and maybe i’ll consider deleting

You: please don’t do this again. just delete them and we both can go our separate ways donghyuck.

Unknown: either you come over or i send it to him. your call

Haechan smiled to himself when you texted you were on the way. He was going to make you his again.

Haechan decided to tidy up the place before your arrival, spraying some cheap air freshener in his living room to make his apartment seem more comfortable. He wanted seeing you again to be memorable, setting up a camera in the far left corner in his living room hiding it good enough so you wouldn’t see. His hands felt sweaty and his heart rate was increasing, butterflies filling his tummy. He couldn’t believe he was actually about to see you, a grin slowly creeping on his face.

You had a horrible feeling about how this whole thing was going to go. Haechan never takes no for an answer and you had a gut feeling it was going to take everything in you to get him to delete those old videos. The pit of your stomach began to drop when you arrived at his apartment. Horrible flashbacks started playing in the back of your head when you parked your car. let’s just get this over with you thought to yourself as you approached Haechan’s door.

It’s like he could feel your presence at the door opening it before you even knocked. He smiled, “hi”

“hey..” you mumbled under your breath barely looking at him.

Haechan opened the door wider welcoming you in. Everything was still the same.. the exact same. Same old raggedy furniture that he should’ve thrown away years ago. Even your old pictures of the two of you were hanging on the wall. All the memories between you two begin to flood your mind and you need to get haechan to delete these videos so you could leave and never think about him again.

“Come sit,” Haechan patted his thigh, that shit eating grin resting on his lips. You didn’t want to upset or trigger anything obeying everything he asked you to do. You sat on his knee, hands resting uncomfortably in your lap. “So tell me what’s been new? How are things with your little boyfriend?” he asked, moving your hair out of your face to see you better, making you close your eyes at his touch. “Things are okay...”

“Just okay?” he asked emphasizing on ‘just’

“things are good..” you corrected yourself trying to shift off his lap a bit haechan pulling you closer to him squeezing your thigh. “Why are you trying to run away from me?” He asked with a slight pout to his lips

“Haechan.. please” your voice was barely above a whisper refusing to make eye contact with him. “I just want you to delete the videos so we can go our separate ways again”

“Come on, you don’t miss me?” you didn’t reply quick enough for his liking making haechan pull you all the way onto his lap a gasp leaving your lips as you now straddled him.

“Haechan” you called softly “ohh now you can hear me” he let out a teasing laugh rubbing his hands up and down your thigh.

“please..” you begged once again. Haechan rubbed your cheek so softly and sweet like he actually cared about anything you were asking him for. He reached in the front of his pocket pulling his phone out unlocking it and showing you his messages. The video of you two already loaded up to be sent to jake. All it took was one press.

“Haechan please stop” you cry, “i’ll do anything!” you blurted out reaching for the phone.

Haechan locked it and looked down at you. And there it was. He knew you were gonna eventually give in.

He rests his arms on the couch looking at your head tilted to the side. “Get on your knees”

You hesitated getting off his lap kneeling between his spread legs. Your hands were shaking unbuckling his jeans only pulling his pants down far enough to free his cock. Haechan hisses at the cool air hitting his tip dripping in pre-cum. your lips glide over his length trying your best to fit him in your mouth. bobbing your head back and forth gently Haechan getting impatient with this little act you were putting up. You’ve sucked his dick plenty of times. Why are you acting like you don’t know what you are doing?

He grabbed a fistful of your hair making you yelp “Are you trying to piss me off huh?” he slapped you across the face making you close your eyes from the sting.

You shook your head no. “I can’t hear you” he slaps you again, a tear falling down your cheek. “no..” you sniffled.

“Then do it right” he pushed your head back down onto his cock doing the work for you.

“fuck” he mumbled under his breath pushing your face all the way down on his cock almost cumming on the spot watching you gag. You pinched at his thigh trying to get him to let go so you could breathe but Haechan didn’t care. He just wanted to get his dick wet by his favorite girl.

He finally pulled you up smirking at the way you gasped for air. He let out a moan at the sight of you. Drool and spit dripping down your chin and chest. Eyes filled with tears. He loved seeing you all messy like this. He swore his cock got harder from you crying. For him it was his favorite site. He grabbed you by the jaw guiding you back to his lap.

“Sit on it” you sniffled again wanting to tell him no but couldn’t risk making him more upset. Taking a step back to take your shorts and panties off. You align his cock up with your entrance gripping onto his shoulders to help steady yourself. Haechan surprisingly lets you take your time easing down on his cock the stretch feeling unbelievable.

Haechan let out a sigh when you finally sat all the way. Hands gripping your hips “still so fucking tight— shit”

“y/n— you gotta move or fuck— i’ll fuck up into you” you let your hands rest on his shoulder slowly beginning to bouce up and down.

“it hurts.. you’re too big” you mumbled in between sobs.

“Jake doesn’t fill you up this well does he baby?” you close your eyes at the mention of Jake. Feeling completely horrible for even doing this.

“You missed me didn’t you?” Haechan asked, thrusting up into you watching the way you bite your lip to hold back your moan.

your legs were growing weak and you felt like you could cum in any second. You wanted to keep your eyes closed but couldn’t help but look at the way haechan was so into it. His head was thrown back resting against the couch as he helped you bounce on his big cock. Lip snuck between his teeth watching the way his cock goes in and out of your sweet cunt.

“it’s so big,” you whimpered. “I know baby” Haechan cooed wiping at your tears.

“missed you and this pretty fucking pussy so much” he shook his head, “can’t believe you stayed this tight”

you tried to ignore his words grabbing at his shoulders so hard you were sure he’ll have marks in the morning.

“so pathetic your boyfriend can’t get you off the way i can”

“stop” you managed to mumble out. “What's wrong? don’t like it when i talk about your sweet boyfriend?” he teased.

“How do you think he’ll feel if he saw you right now? Whoring yourself out like this for me?” the tears wouldn’t stop. You hid your face in his shoulder begging him to stop bringing Jake up.

He let out a laugh at the way you hid yourself rubbing circles in your clit. “Haechan please.. stop” you weren’t even sure if you were letting out real words anymore. Your head was dizzy and full off of being a shitty girlfriend and Haechan.

“You’re so fucking close i know you” he laughed. “Cumming from the thought of your boyfriend seeing us fuck hm? Pretty fucked up way of thinking huh pretty girl?” The tears wouldn’t stop still hiding your face in the crook of his neck.

“you’re only crying because you feel bad for enjoying this” you begin to sob harder because he’s right.

You didn’t miss haechan and you didn’t miss your relationship but you missed this. The sex life. His big cock that he only enjoyed abusing on you. You love Jake and everything about him but you knew for a fact he wouldn’t fill you up the way Haechan is right now.

“Gonna cum in you” Haechan groaned, closing his eyes shut. You jolted up at his words telling him no.

“Gonna cum in your sweet cunt” Haechan moaned again ignoring your first protest.

“Haechan you can’t! i’m not on the pill—“ he covered your mouth with his left hand tossing his head back as he came in you. Filling you up so good. You closed your eyes at the feeling letting another tear fall down your cheek. Haechan finally took his hand off your mouth trying to catch his breath.

He unlocked his phone showing you to your face that the videos are gone. Deleting all three. You still sat there cheeks puffy and eyes swollen red from all your crying. Haechan wiped your face and kissed your cheeks.

“You don’t have to worry anymore okay? it’s all done” you gave him a nod getting off to clean yourself up before heading home. You couldn't wait to be back in Jake’s arms again.

When you left his apartment haechan promised not to contact you. Apologizing for bothering you in the first place again. You felt pretty good about it this time not feeling the need to block him on anything.

Haechan reached behind his flower pot, stopping the video he recorded. He smiled to himself when he hit play hearing your sobs and pleads. God it was good enough to get him hard again but not tonight. He uploaded the video to his laptop adding to a folder labeled ‘y/n’ where he kept all videos and pictures of you over the past two years. He walked up to his calendar lifting up the page to October. Circling October 21st. That’s when he’ll text you again with another video, surprise. He couldn’t believe how easy this was again.

He finally had your trust back.

[puppyplayhouse]

Step brother Hyunjin things

Warnings: puppy reader, degradation, blackmail, choking at some point, dub con, kissing.

Lil headcanon of mean step bro Hyunjin (who maybe is possessive) being a dick (it's so delicious tho)

Has known you since you were both little because your parents were family friends before their respective divorces, so he knows every button to push.

Constantly using Dad against you. It's a core part of his blackmail, really. Every time you're a little less than compliant, he pulls up one of the thousands of pictures he's taken of you during your times together and asks what you think Dad would have to say about it.

Calls you puppy when people are around just to get you flustered. He's amazing at playing it off so that nobody questions it because well, he's just a good brother and you've always been SO close.

Any time he sees you alone on the couch, he's tugging his pants down and tapping his cock against your cheek. Of course, you protest. You tell him that you don't know when your parents are getting back. He doesn't care, though. He tells you that you should shut up and get to work if you don't want them to find out.

He's not always mean, though. You'd even say he's somewhat nice when you've had a really hard day and you come to him reluctantly, kneeling in front of him because you just can't be in control right now, and he's the only person who can take that from you.

He rewards you so well for that. For any willing submission you offer him, he returns it by making you cum over and over again on his fingers before he fucks you nice and slow, rolling his hips lazily into yours to drag out the low, whimpered moans that you let slip. He's only gentle with you when you earn it.

He loves to make you cum. He loves it even more when your pretty mouth is objecting to it and telling him he shouldn't be doing it, but your hips are bucking against him and your nails are digging into his arm in a pathetic attempt to ground yourself.

And he takes pictures every time. Sometimes, he'll force you to pose and use his fancy camera. Those are the more tasteful shots of you in pretty lingerie with wide doe eyes. Other times he's using his phone to capture the tears that spill down your cheeks as you gag around the length of his cock. He loves both equally.

He always has to degrade you. He'll pin you down completely still the movement of his hips as he makes you beg, always something along the lines of "C'mon, puppy. You were all talk before begging me to stop and now you're panting like a bitch in heat. Tell me you want it. That's it, more. I know you can do better than that. Tell me you're my worthless slut."

He knows you like it because your pussy is always dripping and practically pulses around him.

He would never admit it, but after a while you become the only person he fucks. Sure, he could have his pick, but he knows nobody else would look as cute as you do when you're staring up at him wide, panicked eyes, and tear stained cheeks.

He fucking loves seeing you cry. He loves watching you bite your pillow when he finds you laid on your bed and forces your pants down without a word, easily sliding his cock inside of you because you're always soaked at this point.

At some point he starts making you tell him that you love him. He has a firm grip of your throat and you're overstimulated to the point of becoming delirious as he uses one of your toys on you, thrusting it in an out of your aching cunt. "Tell me, and I'll stop, yeah? All you have to do is tell me how much you love me."

And you do. You say it like a prayer. You say it over and over again even after he's stopped, and he's got your cheeks cradled in his hands, cooing at you because you took everything he gave you without a complaint this time.

He was recording it, of course.

Recording you is his second favourite form of torture. He has so many videos of you sat pretty between his legs, your hands in fist infront of you like little paws as your tongue sticks out of your mouth, drool dripping down onto his lap to create a messy wet patch on the fabric of his pants. Those are his favourite to get himself off to.

Sweet brother Hyunjin is always nice enough to let you know when he's getting himself off to you. Which is every time. He sends you videos and pictures of his gorgeous cock fucking up into his hand and it's the only time he seems out of control, desperate for it to be you that he was burying his cock into instead.

Very rarely does he lay back and let you do the work. He likes taking charge and making a mess of you, but very rarely when you're being a good dog and sitting patiently, waiting almost excitedly for his next round of abuse, he lets you do the work. He'll pat his lap and wait for you to climb on top of him, watching in amusement as you fumble with his zipper and shove his pants down, messily grinding yourself against his bulge until he quietly tells you that if you don't move on, he'll leave.

You always perk up at that, taking it less as a threat and more as permission to sink yourself down on his cock. This is when he praises you.

He tells you how pretty you look and that you take his cock so fucking well, looking up at you with something akin to adoration sparkling in his eyes. He might even kiss you. His kisses are the ultimately reward, always slow and sensual. You become ravenous when he kisses you.

Maybe he'll even tell you he loves you. That you're his favourite puppy. He knows he loves you, and he has accepted that. But maybe he'll let you know when your grinding down onto his cock like the well trained mutt he has made you into.

He doesn't make it too sweet though. More like, "that's it. Take my cock, baby. Fuck, I love you. My desperate little slut. All fucking mine, yeah?"

[thebomb-thebird-andtheburntbitch]

w.count: 1.8k- he's back.. as a treat c:

recently, kyojurou always sleeps best with a weight on his chest.

this hasn't always been the case, however. no, for the vast majority of his life, sleep had usually always found him quite easily. the small douse of sleep resistance in his early days was the only time on mental record that he could truly recall sleep evading him. on top of his usual power naps on the clock- since traveling in the sun and working under the moon left little time for many full nights rest- he can say he does well for himself in the exhaustless department.

of course, that was until you threw a wrench into everything.

the casual relationship you both had was something both frustrating and comforting to the 20-something flame hashira. on one hand, you both knew that relationships could prove to be difficult in the long run with this occupation. with him being sent out on near back-to-back high-level jobs dealing with more lethal demons than others... he didn't want to unintentionally burden you with anxiety over his safety and well-being. kyojuro was strong, stronger than other fellow hashira, but still weaker than others. and even if his strength seemed flawless in the eyes of weaker people- he isn't infallible and you know that.

so, after a long discussion with you on a night where he had downtime, the conclusion you both came to was- as forementioned- a simple and complicated one. he would continue to care for and about you, treating you with affection he knows you deserve. but he would always be mindful never to cross that threshold into a labeled relationship. you agreed to his terms and offered to return everything he gave you in kind.

however, even if that was what was decided by you both mutually, the turning in his gut when something happened to his distaste didn't just go away. situations where someone was too close to you, where you looked someone else's way so that you wouldn't stick to him like a leech looking for sustenance. when you would excuse yourself to some other task so you wouldn't overstep the bonds of your agreement. it irked him down into the pit of his stomach.

perhaps it was jealousy of others or maybe it was envy since even though he cared so much he couldn't comfortably have you like others could.

it was moments like the one he found himself a week ago where all those feelings fell off his shoulders like dried clumps of dirt. cracking and chipping off his body. a rare chance to accompany you on a mission was always a welcome occasion in his books.

the missions location was in the moutains and the rain was heavy all day and well into the evening. with the lack of light from the sun that had long since set and the terrain that was only worsening, he implored that you both seek shelter in the nearest abandoned hut or cave you could find.

"it would be far too careless to continue on this way," he instructs. to ensure you stay at his side, his hand held tightly onto yours. the way the rain and wind tried to make his hand slip against yours and threaten to break you apart from him only made his hold tighten. "come, under here." he yanks you gently into a small undercut of rock and grass and mud. it was hardly the ideal place for shelter, but it was the best option for the current situation.

grabbing onto the cutout rock made throughout time, he lets you sit and tuck your knees in first before he's clambering under beside you. admittedly, the fit is tight since this particular undercut courtesy of the land wasn't particularly large. in fact, the longer you both sat squeezed together with your toes still getting soaked by rainwater and mud, the more it seemed like this was actually a bad idea and that you should've just kept on going until something more suitable popped up.

"perhaps we should-" his suggestion of possibly relocating somewhere else was promptly cut off by your body sliding off his shoulder that you had been leaning against. your head lulled off, ducking and acting as a weight that caused your whole upper body to shift. your shoulder slides off his and across half of his chest before he quickly catches it in the palm of his opposite hand to stop you from falling into his lap entirely. "are you-" the word 'alright' never makes it out of his mouth when he sees you... "asleep?"

how in the world you managed to tune out the sound of the heavy downpour a foot away from your face, or even find comfort in your soaked and chilly clothes is lost on him. maybe you had been exhausted and he didn't notice- which sends a pang of guilt through his chest- but surely you would've told him so if that were the case.

using his other hand that wasn't holding your shoulder up, he wraps his arm around your shoulders, bringing it around to place on your forehead. you weren't sick, were you? through the dampness of your skin, he felt no heat of fever, so that wasn't it.

kyojuro doesn't understand, but he doesn't truly need to. understanding wouldn't change the fact you were asleep.

his arm that was used to check your temperature stayed around you and even pulls you closer to him. his knee that was closest to you was bent to avoid the rain, though he extends it back out into the rainfall once again to make room for your comfort soaking the fabric straight through. your back pushed against his chest in a comforting sense of pressure. your head lay tilted under his jaw- nose just barely brushing against his throat- which he had adjusted so he could rest his chin easily on your crown.

you smell of rain and grass, but under it, he still could smell the scent of you among the elements. even though you were both drenched, he still found you warm against him and as he shut his eyes to take in the moment of peace, he thought that perhaps this peace was how you managed to fall asleep in the first place.

now, kyojuro sits irritated. legs and arms crossed as his eyes scrunch closed. his leg bounces and his fingers tap against his bicep as he sits in his resting robes on top of his futon.

since that day, the great annoyance he feels creep up his neck when he lays down to rest keeps him from doing so. boring himself to sleep has worked once or twice, but it never lasts. even when he did get sleep, he was always restless, which he greatly disliked since his whole life before this, he was a fairly heavy sleeper.

he's tried other possible solutions. using an extra pillow and laying it on his chest. folding a large blanket up to sit on top of him. he's even contemplating getting a stray dog off the street just for it to curl up on his warm chest- even if that was a considerably foolish idea.

kyojuro's stay at this abode was temporary. it was one of the few wisteria houses that take in and care of demon slayers, and he was set to leave in a day or so. becoming fed up with his impossible plight, he pulls his robes tighter around his waist and shifts the sleeves to cover his shoulders more appropriately before he leaves his temporary room.

perhaps some fresh air would be good for him.

he barely makes it two steps out of his room before he's being addressed. down the hall, his name comes from the mouth that is the cause for all his restless nights unbeknownst to you.

"kyojuro!" you softly call so as to not wake anyone sleeping at the late hour. he turns to see you waving at him and coming closer. at your approach feels his resolve crack. "i heard you were staying here when i arrived earlier. what're you still doing up?"

when you come up to him and stop at his bare feet standing on the veranda, he splinters more. he can hear the cracks in his subconscious instead of your words he knows what you're saying because your lips are moving.

"are you going to sleep?" his sudden question cuts you off and you stare at him with pure confusion since it had nothing to do with what you were previously saying. even in this dull lighting, he seemed awfully tired. more so than you remember ever seeing before. reaching up, you cup his cheek in one of your hands with concern painting your face.

kyojuro shatters at the contact.

you yelp when he gently takes your hand into his and pulls it off his face only to march back into his still-open door and drag you in after him. kyojuro shuts the door behind you before he grabs your shoulders and pushes you down as gently as he can onto his futon after marching you to it.

"hey!" you whisper yell, hardly able to see anything aside from the moonlight casting shadows into his room. "what's this all about?" you yelp again when he wordlessly yanks the covers out from under you so he can crawl under them. before you can start questioning him again, he's snaking his arm under your arm and pushing his palm against the middle of your back.

your hands brace yourself against his chest as he falls onto his back, and you're left awkwardly lying halfway on top of him. at your weight, you feel him let out a deflating breath onto the top of your head.

"uh, kyojuro?" you attempt to push against his chest and sit up to ask him what in the world has gotten into him, but he stops you. his grip around you is solid and you feel the tips of his fingers push further into your back to keep you in place.

"stay." he all but commands in a tone that was soaked in irritated drozziness. you simply drop your forehead into the crook of his neck defeated. there are no more words exchanged that night. with you perched on top of him, kyojuro easily falls asleep for the first full nights rest he's had in a week.

in the morning, when he fesses up to his body's sudden demand of your presence, weight, and warmth for even a decent night of rest, you can't help but tease him.

it takes a while to find some sort of middle solution to his sleepless problems since you can't always be around him for obvious work-related reasons. kyojuro doesn't say it out loud, but you're his just as much as he's yours- as per your agreement. that alone should give him the right to hold you at night when you're around at the very least.

a/n: mmmm i feel like this could've been so much better but im rUSTY ;n;

[hauntedhokage]

Handsy

Caleb/F!Reader (not MC)

Caleb comes to visit you while you're working

rating: explicit

word count: 1.7k

warnings: dominant reader, subby Caleb, semi-public handjob

happy Caleb official announcement day! 

“I just cleaned that bed off, jerk.” 

Your scolding has no impact on the mood of the pilot, so you know better than to look to see if he even looked remorseful. He wouldn’t, that just wasn’t his style. Nothing was broken and nobody was hurt, what would he need to apologize for?

“Now c’mon, beautiful, is that any way to treat a patient?”

“You’re taking advantage of the fact that I’m running the infirmary for the night,” you counter, turning on your heel only to be stopped short by an official injury slip. “You’re joking.”

“Signed off by a Captain and everything.”

So it was, or at least it appeared to be, but you needed to see it to add to the record. You reach for the slip, only for him to pull it back the instant it grazes against your fingers. You try again and meet the same result, prompting you to reach in and snatch it away from the laughing pilot before he could pull it from your reach once more. 

Idiot slipped in oil and hit his head. Somehow in non-slip boots? Dumbass.

-Capt. Olivera

A head injury? You look between the slip that (unfortunately) was legitimate and the pilot you snatched it from, trying to figure out if it was severe enough that you’d have to send him to the actual hospital for scans. But he just sits there, watching you with that predatory grin you’d grown to enjoy. 

“You’re not acting like you have a head injury, Caleb.” 

“Trust me baby, it hurts real bad. Both of my heads.”

“Disgusting,” you scoff, setting the now crumpled sheet of paper down on the counter in the room while pulling your stethoscope from around your neck. “Let’s check your vitals, dunce.”

He sheds his jacket like he knows to, offering his arm when you produce the blood pressure cuff from beside the bed - like a model patient, or someone who has spent way too much time in the infirmary when he should’ve been tending to his plane or whatever it was the pilots did with their time. He even gets a bit quiet when he knows you’re counting, but he does use his free arm to pull you in closer. In your stumble your leg brushes against his crotch, and you can only sigh at the fact that he really did come see you in the infirmary with a hard-on. 

“Your blood pressure is a bit high,” you murmur, pushing his hair back from his forehead and tilting his head back in the process. “Pretty sure it was last time, too.”

“And the time before that,” he adds, smiling when you give his hair a gentle tug.  “But when I come in and Macie takes my vitals they’re fine.”

“Are you suggesting I don’t do my job right?”

“Never! I’m saying you get me rock hard, doc.”

“Interesting,” you murmur, leaning in and giving him the kiss that you knew he was wanting from you. 

In all the places you could be making out with one of the pilots, one of the exam rooms in the infirmary should’ve been at the top of the list of places you shouldn’t have been doing that. But Caleb was a special case, flirty and annoying with minimal respect for your personal space. You should’ve pushed him away the first time he came onto you, especially since you’d been working at that time as well, but he had a pout that was impossible to deny and the way he kissed you sent a lightning storm through your nervous system that had you hooked. 

“Wouldn’t a boner mess with my blood pressure?”

“High blood pressure can also give you ED so I’d be careful with these readings you’re getting recorded.” 

He laughs off the warning, gently pulling you in closer by your hips and holding you there so you couldn’t get away easily. There’s a mumbled comment about easier access to viagra that way, something that you want to counter but know better than to try when the hands on your hips guide you up onto the exam bed with him.  

It’s the middle of the evening with plenty of time for more visitors to the infirmary, and that alone has you pulling away from him before someone walked in and got you both fired. 

“Don’t be cruel, baby.” His breathless plea has you shaking your head, adjusting your scrubs while he undid his belt and jeans. “I’ve got high blood pressure.”

“I’m going to do this one thing for you,” you start, peeling your gaze away from the cock he’s set free in favor of looking him in the eye. “Then you’re going to room three where you will behave for the night.”

“What do I get if I’m good?”

You hum, taking his cock in your hand and giving a gentle squeeze that has him moaning against your lips. 

“I’m undecided. You’re already not being very good, Caleb.”

To have such a talented and (slightly) imposing pilot be reduced to a pathetic whine is a remarkable feat to most, but for you this was just a Thursday night. There was a balance of power with being a medic, one you really only exercised when it was Caleb under your care - professionally or otherwise - and you know that he got off on being under your control. Was he the picture of pure obedience? Not at all, but he was pretty cute when he pouted. 

“Been thinking about you all day, y’know. Saw you watching over the rookie physical exams and you looked so hot.” 

“I’m sure.” You try to sound disinterested, pulling your hand away from his cock to hold in front of his chin. He doesn’t need to be told to spit into it, earning soft praise before you’re going back to stroking his cock. “You always say you’re thinking about me.”

“Because I am, doc.” 

“Really?”

“Y-yeah,” he grunts, eyes closing when your free hand gently cups his sac. He’s trying hard to keep quiet, brow furrowed in focus as you continue to stroke his cock, and you reward him with a squeeze that has a moan tumbling from his lips. “Shit, s-sorry doc.”

You don’t need to tell him it was okay, or remind him that had to control himself - these were things he already knew. This wasn’t the first time you’d given him some sort of release while you were supposed to be working, he was well aware of the rules when he came to you like this - and also well aware that the soft spot you had for him made it so you wouldn’t blue ball him here. You weren’t cruel.

“C-can I have your mouth, too?”

“Maybe later, if you’re good.” 

There’s no pushback, no begging, just a nod as he leans back on his forearms to watch you. It’s uncharacteristic of Caleb to just let things happen without much of a fight, especially when you had his cock in your hand and were controlling the progression of the evening, so you’re not quite sure what to say to him. But you supposed that there wasn’t much that had to be said, especially when you’d told him to be quiet in the first place - it would be okay to just enjoy this time you had with him.

He was handsome, his cheeks and neck flushed a delightful pink that complimented the purple irises that peek out from beneath his lashes. The flat planes of his body rose and fell so neatly with every breath he took, even the stuttered ones that came when you gave his balls a squeeze or pinched the tip of his cock. And when he got close to his orgasm; his eyelids fluttering as he struggles to keep them open, his plump bottom lip pulled between his teeth to fight off any noise he might want to make while every muscle in his body tensed - he was beautiful. 

“You’re so pretty when you’re about to cum,” you murmur, removing your hand from his sac to gently coax his bottom lip from between his teeth. “Cum for me, Caleb.”

“F-fuck doc.” He can only manage a hiss between grit teeth, his cock pulsing in your hand as you continue your quick strokes. “Please don’t stop, I’m gonna-”

He’s cut off by his own groan, coming from deep in his chest as his hips buck into your hand. You tear your eyes away from the blissful expression he wore in favor of watching the spurts of translucent white land on his stomach and your hand in the most sinful painting that belonged in every prestigious gallery on the planet. 

A slow drag of your thumb along his heaving stomach collects a decent amount of his cum, and you watch with a fond smile and clenching cunt as he takes it into his mouth without hesitation. 

“Was I good enough?” 

“I suppose.” The noncommittal response gets an indignant huff from the pilot, but you’re still smiling as you lean in to kiss him. “I’ll check on you later tonight. Head injuries aren’t something to play with.”

“Spend some extra time with me tonight, doc.” The request is mumbled against your lips, followed by his tongue prodding at your closed mouth when you let out a noncommittal hum. “I’m leaving tomorrow afternoon to visit family in Linkon.”

You want to say no, you really do, despite the way he’s pressing little kisses to your mouth as you think about how to let him down easy. You still had work to do, you couldn't abandon your duties in the clinic to cuddle up with an injured pilot in a room all night just because he was going on leave. But you also couldn’t just let him leave for a while without having sex with him at least once, that would be unfair. There was a compromise there somewhere, and you find it when you consider the timing.

“We can grab breakfast in the morning. I get off shift at five.” He nods eagerly at your suggestion, and you kiss him one last time before finally stepping away. “Now get the fuck out, I need to sanitize that bed again.”

“Yes ma’am.” He manages a lazy salute while one-handedly tucking his cock back into his pants, and you roll your eyes as you turn to wash your hands in the sink. “Think we can make it breakfast in bed?”

“Earn it.”

[wake-me-up-inside-imagines]

Ok, I just read your sweet yandere post and would like to add something.

I love the idea of like a mafia boss yandere or someone who is usually cruel (like maybe a Hades sort of character) but is an absolute sweet heart to their darling. One of my fave tropes

OOOOOOH I LOVE THIS TROPE! I have a character who's just like this actually, a total sweetheart to whoever he's with but has a very low tolerance for most other people.

Sorry, this is a long one lol

I'm gonna make headcanons now because you've inspired me lol.

(Banner/divider credit goes to @cafekitsune)!

Tw: Kidnapping, mentions of violence

Mafia boss! Charlie who is no stranger to violence. He's lived his entire life surrounded by it, in fact. Having a mafia boss for a father will do that to you, he guesses.

Mafia boss! Charlie who's spent his whole life working for the mafia, being trained to kill, smuggle, and deal ever since he was a child. He grew up living a life of crime, rising up the ranks (thanks to his father), before taking over as the boss when his father was killed by an unruly client.

Mafia boss! Charlie who's a cruel, ruthless man. He's killed dozens of people, injured many more, and runs his organization with an iron fist. He may be young, but he's learned enough to know that any show of trust, any display of kindness is a show of weakness, a show of vulnerability. He can't afford that, not when he's the head of the mafia, so he makes sure to make it so that no one will question or challenge his authority by any means necessary.

Mafia boss! Charlie who has very few real friends, keeping those he does have at an arm's length. He'd rather die than admit that he craves real relationships, that he desires to make genuine, true connections with others. But he can't, so he pushes his wants to the side, reminding himself that his only purpose is to keep his business running smoothly, nothing more.

Until he sees you, that is.

Mafia boss! Charlie who meets you out on a grocery run one day. Your interaction is nothing special, at least to you, but Charlie can't help but marvel at how easily you make conversation with him while ringing up his items, how seemingly unfazed you are by his snappy attitude and unapproachable appearance. It's been a long, long time since he's met anyone unafraid of him, and those people are usually rivals who are too cocky for their own good. So this, this is new. He knows it's stupid, he knows that your tiny interaction shouldn't have mattered much to someone like him, but he can't help but feel giddy about the connection he's sure he felt.

Mafia boss! Charlie who, against his better judgment, wastes no time in trying to find out who you are. It's not hard, he has an entire organization full of trained trackers, stalkers, and informants at his disposal, and by the end of the day, he has your full name, address, social media accounts, family tree, medical records, and much more safely in his welcoming hands. He knows this is a bit overkill considering he only met you today and your interaction lasted five minutes at most, but now that he has a taste of real human interaction, he's addicted. He needs more.

Mafia boss! Charlie who quickly becomes awestruck and obsessed with you. His whole life, he's been surrounded by the craftiest, cruelest, most violent people imaginable, so to see someone, especially someone as precious as you, live a completely normal life, naive to the dangers he faces everyday? It's captivating! Of course, he can't follow you all day, he is a mafia boss after all, but he has enough people following you around and recording your every move that he doesn't need to! He's never been happier to be who his is than now.

Mafia boss! Charlie who thinks you're the most beautiful person in the world. You're a sweet little thing, too gentle and too unaware of the dangers around you for your own good. He loves everything about you, no matter how weird or embarrassing. He's content to watch you carefully for a couple months, but as time goes on, his need to feel our touch, to talk to you, to see you face to face is too much. He needs you. He needs you NOW. It doesn't help that you're so vulnerable and weak compared to him, with no knowledge of weaponry or stealth to keep you safe. What if someone were to try and hurt you? Of course, his goons wouldn't let that happen, not if they wanted to keep their organs, but he would feel so much better if he could keep an eye on you personally. Not to mention, every mafia boss needs a spouse, and some of his higher ranking associates have been hinting that it's about time he found someone...

Mafia boss! Charlie who immediately starts planning your "transfer" to his house, meticulously drafting out every last detail to secure your safety. He chooses his best, most skilled employees to carry out his plan, only the best for his darling, and sends them out to bring you "home". That day you come home from work, completely unaware of the people in your apartment, completely unaware of the sleeping pills dumped into your water while you weren't looking.

Mafia boss! Charlie who's ecstatic to finally have you with him, to finally have someone to hold, to talk to, to love. He brings your unconscious body to your new room, laying you softly on the bed while instructing his employees to pack up all your belongings and bring them to him. He doesn't tie you down or chain you up, he has enough security measures in place to make sure you won't be able to escape. You won't even be able to leave your room without him being notified.

Mafia boss! Charlie who watches the camera in your room as you wake up for the first time in your new home, confused and disoriented. All of your stuff is here, but this is NOT your apartment. Where are you? He watches as you start to freak out, guilt flashing through him for the first time in his life. He doesn't want you to be scared, he just wants to keep you safe!

Mafia boss! Charlie who sends one of his gentler employees into your room to explain everything, too afraid of scaring you even further by showing up himself. He waits a few days before revealing himself to you, when your terror has calmed down and you've become more familiar with your surroundings. He kind of just stands there, unable to formulate a sentence, which is extremely unnerving to you. You've been told you're to be married to a highly respected and violent mafia boss, and here he is, just...staring. When he opens his mouth to speak, your surprised at how soft his voice is, calmly explaining to you that you're safe, you won't be hurt. He reaches out his hand to touch you, but recoils when you flinch, not wanting to push you.

Mafia boss! Charlie who does everything he can to make you more comfortable and less afraid of him, getting you anything and everything you've ever shown interest in, giving you as much space as you need, and letting you roam the rather large house freely. All you can't do is leave. He doesn't understand why you're still so scared, sure he's a criminal, but he promised he would never hurt you!

Mafia boss! Charlie who gets more desperate for your love as time goes on. He starts appearing in whatever room your in, softly talking to you about his day or about whatever you're doing, trying to get you to be more comfortable with him. Once you've gotten used to that, he starting slowly initiating physical contact, holding you in his arms like he's never going to let you go (because he won't). He tried his hardest not to push your boundaries, but eventually his need to be near you becomes too great. Rest assured though, he would never, ever dream of hurting you or purposely scaring you.

Mafia boss! Charlie who can't get enough of the feeling of your skin on his. He starts hugging/cuddling you whenever he can, holding you like you'll break if he presses too hard. He's always near you, cuddling up to you while telling you about how much he loves you, adoration shining in his eyes. He's the clingiest at night though, whispering sweet nothings into your ear as you fall asleep, him watching over you until he succumbs to his own tiredness. And his kisses? They are the softest, fluffiest thing you've ever felt. He cannot get enough of your lips, and he always kisses you passionately, like you'll disappear once he separates from you. With how loving and gentle he is, it doesn't take long for you to start loving him back.

Mafia boss! Charlie who starts giving you more privileges the farther you fall into stockholm. He'll even start taking you out in public on dates once he thinks there's no chance of you trying to escape him. He'd be able to find you if you did, he has many, many connections, but he trusts you won't. He loves going out with you and doing normal, coupley things with you, it's a nice break from his usual, violent life.

Mafia boss! Charlie who is insanely protective of you, never leaving you alone in a room with anyone except for himself. He knows how dangerous it is to be associated with him and now that he has you, he refuses to let anything happen to you. Any rival who attempts to hurt, kill, or kidnap you is met with Charlie himself, who enacts the most brutal, torturous death he can possibly think of on them. Nobody will come close to hurting you, he'll make sure of it. But no matter what happens, he'll always make sure you're far, far away from the violence. He never wants to subject you to the horrors he's seen (and done).

Mafia boss! Charlie who feels awful the first time you hear him raise his voice. It wasn't at you of course, he would never, ever think of yelling at his darling, you just happened to be in the room when he was meeting with one of his associates. It's scary seeing him yell, threatening brutal acts of violence on his own employee, and for the first time you realize how different he is with others than he is with you. He's quick to shut the meeting down once he realizes you're there, spending the rest of the night apologizing to you and assuring you he would never speak to you like that. This'll be the first time he truly opens up about what his job is like and why he has to be as cruel as he is, trying to help you understand why he behaved the way he did. It's difficult for him to make himself vulnerable, but he'd gladly to it if it meant easing your mind. From then on, he makes absolute sure you aren't around whenever he has to take care of business. He refuses to let you see him like that ever again.

Mafia boss! Charlie who never lets you forget how much he needs you in his life. You're the only thing keeping him from devolving into insanity, he wouldn't know how to handle himself if you were gone. He'll give you everything and anything if you listen to him and stay by his side, so please... please don't try to leave him.

Not that you would be able to, anyway.

[strawberry-cowmilk]

the brothers when they miss mc

-> brothers x mc

-> mc is in the human world and the brothers are feeling lonely

mc's gender is not mentioned, not proof read

content warnings: angst, feelings of loneliness

-----

Lucifer

he literally cannot focus on a single thing and it bothers him, what did you do to him to cause him to lose his edge?

even diavolo can tell something is bothering him but of course he denies it

to take his mind off of missing you and wanting to hold you, lucifer decides to listen to some of his favorite records

until he realised one was about feeling alone too

Mammon

he begs everyone who can send him to see you, to do so

mammon promised lucifer he won't spend a single grimm for a month just to see you but none of his attempts work

he tries to secretly call or text you any time he can, especially after something bad happened to him that day

you were there to cheer him up, whether you knew you had that power by just standing there or not, mammon misses that

Leviathan

he just stares blankly at the starting screen of his game that reads 'player 1: levi and select player 2'

like you were one of his very few friends, how could you be taken away from him like that? levi just turns of the game and gets in his bathtub

he does vent about it to his fish, but let's be realistic the fish can't do anything and can't understand what's going on

he never thought he would dread being alone

Satan

he reads and reads to try to get his mind off of missing you, but that doesn't always work

satan is also more easily angered now, and that could become a dangerous situation depending on what happens to him next

satan keeps a diary, so he can give it to you when you're reunited again

but he probably won't ever do that out of shame, almost every page is about how alone he felt without you, emotionally, physically, in any way

Asmodeus

everything just annoys him, and that's when he realised him missing you was worse than he thought

he spams your inbox full of messages, he doesn't even expect you to see every single one but he just likes sharing stuff with you, even if it's a picture of a cool soap bubble in his bath

speaking if the bath, he uses it to relax when he can tell he's getting too sad

he buys you little gifts for your return too

Beelzebub

he's just living his life and then it hits him randomly like 'oh, I miss mc'

sometimes, when he orders food, he automatically gets you something too only to realise you're not with him and then he's sad for the rest of the day

he also feels less hungry and is less motivated to go to the gym

sometimes belphie has to help him cheer up when he feels like he needs somebody to talk to

Belphegor

his solution to anything is to take a nap honestly

but then he ends up dreaming about you, loving the dream, and waking up extremely upset that it was a dream

you can actually tell by how annoyed he looks during breakfast

belphie doesn't talk about this feeling of missing you a lot, which may worry his older brothers

but despite being apart from you, he'll still protect you from nightmares

[commsroom]

circumstances surrounding the “leaked” documents about eiffel’s sentencing in need to know, as i understand them:

one of the very first things kepler does is offer eiffel, minkowski, and lovelace a drink. in true “at any given moment, kepler has about eighteen ulterior motives” spirit, it is, among other things, “hospitality”, sure, a test for eiffel, definitely, but… i think the main reaction he was checking for was minkowski’s. will she look at eiffel, or react to his reaction? how much does she know? how much does he trust her?

in don’t poke the bear, jacobi and maxwell stop lovelace from breaking into kepler’s server by pretending to be in on it with her: “she’s very good. it might turn into a problem.” / “i’ll run it by kepler.” two episodes later, files from kepler’s very secure server are “leaked.”

(the words "need to know" are spoken offhandedly by eiffel in the episode itself, but it also calls back to the excuse maxwell gives lovelace: "colonel kepler practically lives by the words 'need to know.' and, apparently, nothing i can say will ever convince him that i 'need to know' everything that's in our databanks.")

need to know opens with minkowski finishing an eleven hour shift, and then finding out kepler moved that shift to, well. now. she’s already frustrated and sleep deprived.

minkowski complains to kepler. jacobi and maxwell, on cue, barge in and complain to kepler. kepler assigns minkowski, jacobi, maxwell, and lovelace to punishment detail, taking eiffel out of the group because “you’re the only one who hasn’t wasted my time with pointless whining.” lovelace says: “um, i don’t think that i did any complaining either, so…” but that doesn’t matter. it’s just an excuse to remove eiffel from the group; he could just as easily have been singled out for special punishment. either way, it was going to happen.

hilbert isn’t there. not the most significant factor, since he’s already been effectively sidelined by kepler, but remember he already knows about eiffel’s sentencing, doesn’t care (about eiffel’s history OR about anyone else’s personal drama), and will later respond to minkowski asking by telling her to grow up and get back to work. it simplifies things to not factor him in.

consider the files themselves: we know from happy holidays that maxwell not talking to her family is common knowledge, but jacobi reacts like it’s news. we know from hera’s performance review flashback in memoria that kepler and jacobi were aware of “multiple attempted crew member homicides” in her record. the file about hera’s bentham directory was on kepler’s server. if there’s one person who would’ve been briefed on everything there was to know about hera, it would’ve been maxwell; her shock is entirely feigned. in fact, almost every reaction from jacobi and maxwell here is feigned. they’re black ops specialists who arrived prepared with divide-and-conquer tactics. there’s no reason they wouldn’t know these things. also note that none of the “leaks” reveal anything about the mission they didn’t already know, and that nothing about the si-5 is incriminating - if anything, it’s mostly silly and even humanizing. and, yes, all of that contextualizes maxwell’s reaction to “skiing?!”

eiffel’s file comes through last, once they’re already worn out. kepler sends eiffel to check on them at the same time so that he’ll walk in. jacobi shows minkowski the file. he lurks around waiting to see how her not-confrontation with eiffel goes, and then cements the thought in her head: what about you? are you going to care?

it’s true that there are aspects of the mission only kepler knows, but as far as information on the hephaestus crew goes (barring one very particular detail about lovelace)? that’s part of the job they were chosen for. when they kill the plant monster, kepler says: “you think we didn’t know about that thing? please. we listened to every log that you beamed down to canaveral.” kepler’s entire foundation is shaken when jacobi turns on him because this is how they operate: “have one person take the blame, say the mean things. meanwhile, the poor, betrayed little guy gets a bit more leeway - just enough to sneak up and hit you from behind.” the show is not subtle about any of this. you can pick apart any early-s3 interaction between two hephaestus crew members and an si-5 agent and see the same divide-and-conquer tactics at play. jacobi and maxwell are always - in morals, loyalty, job description - closer to kepler than they are to the hephaestus crew, and to even sort of believe otherwise is falling for that facade. it’s worth remembering that the hephaestus crew are prisoners. some of them were aware of it from the start, and some of them were lied to, but none of them were meant to leave. the si-5, on the other hand, went up there with a unified goal, and the knowing intention they would be, among other things, prison guards.

[princessbrunette]

hai!!!! just curious, because ik everyone kinda has their own definitions when it comes to different kinds of readers, what do you describe puppy/kitty/bunny/deer!reader as? what makes them them?

anyway, luv ya n all that ya do- ,,^-^,,

ooo fun question !! ໒꒰ྀིᵔ ³ ᵔ ꒱ྀིა

BUNNY:

she was born for the soft life. a highly organised system in her closet, and a whole separate closet just for shoes. she’s not bratty, she doesn’t even know what being bratty is or how to do it, but there are of course times she starts thumping her foot, whining and pulling at rafes clothes. this petulant behaviour is often solved by a stern look, a tap on the cheek or a reach under the skirt to tug at her fluffy bunny butt plug. her nose twitches when she’s upset, and has a big toothy grin when she’s happy. she leaves the glitter from her body all over rafe’s clothes, mink eyelash extensions on the sink, tubes of lipgloss in her boyfriends pockets. she’s an r&b / rap girl lover to her core, and a day isn’t complete without bouncing around her room to flo milli or saweetie. bunny doesn’t have an ounce of shame in her body— whether that’s from her skirt riding up in public (as to which rafe has to irritably tug it down again) to pawing at him, begging him for dick infront of his friends. luckily, rafe doesn’t have much shame either.

KITTY:

be careful, she bites! no really, she does — cross her and she’s squinting at you, sinking her teeth into an arm until you yelp. according to jj, anyway. she’s odd, and that’s what he likes about her— collecting horror movie memorabilia and trinkets from the thrift store she thinks might be ‘haunted’. she keeps her nails long, stiletto shaped even — whether that’s from scraping her money together for acrylics or growing them out herself. she has the craziest oral fixation, always needing something to lick, suck or chew on— that something often being her boyfriend jj. despite the black liner in her waterline, she is still a spoilt little priss who needs her pink ribbons tied round anything and everything, requiring the fluffiest of blankets and pillows for her daily nap. unlike bunny, she does work — having a little gig as a bartender/waitress at a beachside restaurant. she gets super huffy and puffy, not enjoying having to speak to so many people — but her boyfriend gaining a linecook job at the same joint makes things better. she’s deftones biggest fan, even owning a pair of panties with their album cover on the front. jj loves seeing them on the floor of his room.

PUPPY:

she’s playful, clingy, and ever so whiny. shes the most energetic of the bunch, firing off into a million topics at once, talking and talking until john b has to interrupt her to tell her to breathe or she will pass out. her signature is her big doe eyes, used as a weapon ready to fire at all times on anyone who dares to upset her. she’s not spoilt, infact she’s very humble and fairly docile unless provoked— she just requires oodles of attention and affection, pats on the head and praise are her love language! she works at the local pet store, often coming home with hilarious stories about handling animals, john b plucking hay out of her hair as she tells them. she has the energy to keep up with all the animals, running around until she arrives home to john b and passes out on his lap for a quick nap before bursting into a fit of energy once more. pup is never seen without her walkman, and can often be found dancing around the empty chateau with 80s pop blaring in her ears, or knocked out with the audio tapes john b had recorded for her to help her sleep.

DEER:

riddled with anxiety, whilst somehow being the most still and unsettling person in the room. deer!reader, much like a real deer is skittish, easily frightened, but ever so curious. she has a different view on the world to most of her peers, a master in people watching and could win any staring competition. she’s often found with her nose in a book, the topic being either of something completely fanatical, or something informative and peculiar. due to her reading habits, much like her boyfriend pope she is a whirlpool of information, constantly quietly spewing facts into his ear (which let’s be real, is practically foreplay for the two of them.) she has a tendency to get into trouble from her prying, exploring and staring — but she doesn’t mean to come across that way, she’s the picture of innocence really! she likes 50s/ 60s music, finding a charming and simple peace to the sound — and is a mass collector of callico critters, sonny angels and blythe dolls. pope finds it adorable.

[fadedtoneverland]

hello I hope you are well, could you write Mingi x male reader who is androgynous and biracial, the reader is a soloist and his music style is city pop fluff and suggestive please 🫶

“pretty city boy” | s.mg

❤︎ synopsis — just some fluff headcanons of mingi with his amazing bf <3

pairing: idol!mingi x soloist!male!reader

theme: fluff ✿ , suggestive ❤︎

a/n: more ateez !! and with a male reader too! ugh, i love my male readers 🫶🫶 we need more of them in the fanfic space.

cw: suggestive jokes. innuendos (because it’s mingi). teasing from woosansang

▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆

before the relationship

when you first joined the industry, you had no idea what to really expect.

making a fan base and career out of being a kpop soloist was scary, especially because you didn’t have a group prior to debuting to gain traction from

so of course, you were scared

but thanks to your amazing company and staff, they promoted you well enough to make your name known throughout all of korea, and even worldwide.

and of course, when fame comes, other idols start naturally hearing about you.

one of them being song mingi from ateez

as a musician himself, mingi had very high respect for the pretty boy with amazing vocals and stunning, unique visuals.

that pretty boy being you, of course.

so naturally, he got invested

mingi learned more about your company, and also the songs you wrote. he really liked the city pop melodies you’d incorporate, and some of the heavy themes you’d sing about in your songs.

so after diving into your discography, he begged hongjoong to get tickets to one of your seoul concerts

it took a lot of convincing, but joong eventually gave in

so now him, hongjoong, seonghwa and san all went together to watch your concert, and get the full experience of your performances

and it was totally worth draining the captain’s wallet

as a performance heavy idol, mingi takes live performances very seriously. his craft is impeccable, and here he was, starstruck by how easily you dominated the stage

you were made to be a star. it’s like god crafted your very being to make the whole world fall in love with you and scream your name

just like how mingi did in this moment

he was so in awe, that san took notice of this, and even waved a hand in front of mingi’s face during the intermission, trying to get his attention.

not like mingi cared, he still processing the adrenaline high from that insane performance. and it was only the first act

when mingi met you at send off, you were just as sweet as you seemed on stage. polite and courteous, even thanking your sunbaenims for attending your concert

to be honest, you were also fanboying a little upon finding out half of ateez was at your concert. you admired their work a lot, and were very happy to know they enjoyed your performance

safe to say, that wouldn’t be the last time you saw mingi. you kept seeing ateez throughout various award shows and promotions, and of course, you’d talk with mingi every chance you got

he was the member that captivated you the most. tall, handsome, charismatic, talented. just everything a guy should be.

and also he was like totally your type too but let’s not talk too much about that

one day after an award show and during an after party, you gave mingi your number, and soon you both started talking more

and of course, that blossomed into something more

during the relationship

mingi first confessed to you, and over text as well

he’s a busy man, so he never had the chance to do anything romantic as a confession

luckily, you accepted, and you both lived for this secret relationship you guys had.

obviously mingi told ateez, and they’re all very supportive

especially the hyungs, hongjoong and seonghwa. they do their best to assure that they support this, and will do anything to protect his relationship

kq also goes extra lengths to keep his relationship private, as does your record label.

the relationship itself is so cute

mingi likes to act all tough and hardcore, with his dude-bro shades n’ all

but the minute you’re around, he softens up like a puppy

you give him the princess treatment he deserves. surprisingly, you’re the one that pampers mingi more in the relationship, and he doesn’t mind at all.

more hugs and kisses from you, please and thank you.

he calls you his pretty boy

emphasis on the “his”, mingi is lowkey very possessive, and does not want to share his lover.

yeosang, wooyoung and san tease mingi endlessly for acting like such a simp around you.

like one minute, he’ll be arguing with wooyoung about who ate the last pack of ramyeon, but the minute he gets a call from you, he stops the argument and is like “hiii babyyy!! :33”

leaving wooyoung dumbfounded, and mocking mingi in the background with his other two besties

“ewwww look at the simp.” “gay behavior smh.” “get a room you guys”

those are some cool phrases from the trio

your dates consist of composing songs together and visiting cafes

the idol life is demanding and hectic, so your downtime is spent with nice, calming activities

whenever mingi’s stressing about something or experiencing bad anxiety, you kiss his knuckles to make him feel better

and following it by peppering his face with a bunch of kisses to let him know he’s loved <33

mingi’s love language is physical affection.

whenever you’re over at the ateez dorms, which is not often, he’ll take it upon himself to throw his body over you, and cuddle you all day.

mingi will also slap your ass a lot

like, a lot. and you can’t do anything to stop it.

sometimes he’ll straight up grab your ass from behind and whisper not so pg-13 things in your ear

“y’know it’d be really easy for me to just bend you over right now on this kitchen counter.” “mingi i swear to god-“

he’s a shameless little fucker whenever it’s just the two of you.

mingi is not the most horny guy in the world, but damn does he know how to keep you screaming all night

one particular night you guys went at it a little too hard in the ateez dorms… and accidentally kept a few people awake.

the next morning, you limped into the kitchen to see a very… very agitated choi san, with his arms crossed and bloodshot eyes

you would’ve been terrified if he didn’t look so goofy in the moment.

“.. pfft— hey san-“ don’t talk to me.”

you apologized to him of course, and san forgave you.

mingi then later walked in the kitchen with visible hickeys on his neck, and shot a smug ass grin to san. a grin that basically said “yep. i bagged that pretty boy.”

overall, the relationship is very sweet and loving, and you couldn’t be happier to have a man like mingi <3

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