#everyone go read about sam patch

[cloudystevie]

take my heart and start a fire

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pairing || bucky barnes x f!reader

word count || 4566

summary || sam and nat play cupid

warnings || smut! dom! bucky x sub! reader, one bed trope, enemies to lovers, idiots to lovers, degradation, teasing, dry-humping, daddy kink, pussy slaps, dacryphilia, begging, asphyxiation, unprotected sex, aftercare

author's note || 18+ ONLY. hello, one-bed trope with bucky lives in my mind rent free and i decided to do something about it. enjoy! not proof-read yet. feel free to comment, reblog, and send me requests!

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“Alright, we got two rooms, one with just one bed and one with two beds. Should be enough to cover us tonight.” Sam claps his hands together as Bucky slowly walks up to the group. 

This was supposed to be a quick in-and-out mission. It was not easy by any means, but it was nothing the group hadn’t done before. You weren’t even supposed to be here. Usually, you did most of SHIELD’s groundwork, directing and organizing missions alongside Maria. However, due to issues with communication with one particular agent in the previous mission, Fury had instructed you to be on-site to ensure there would be no gaps in the instructions Maria and Steve were relaying. 

Except there was a gap. There was a gigantic gap in communication when you instructed Bucky to cover the cargo trailers in the westbound direction. Still, he decided you were wasting his time, so he left the trailers unattended, where the enemy was then able to take advantage of his isolation and overpower him. Had Natasha not interfered when she did, you did not even want to think about what could have happened. So you let him know just how pissed off you were the whole ride to the nearest motel since the world decided to unleash torrential rain at this very moment which made it impossible for you guys to navigate the jet out of whatever fucking city you were in. 

Bucky didn’t say a single word. Not when you were yelling at him while patching him up. Not when you wouldn't shut the fuck up because he never fucking listened. Not when you were running into the beat-down motel with its flickering sign on its last life while still screaming at him. 

He just stared at you. And he occasionally clenched his jaw. 

This wasn’t the first time Bucky disobeyed your direct order and it wasn’t the first time he got hurt because of that. You understood him, tried to initiate kindness, and extended a friendly hand toward him. But all he ever did was stare at you. He never spoke to you more than he absolutely needed to. He never paid any attention to you when you would hang out with Steve, Sam, or even Nat and Wanda. And it did sting you just a bit. A pang in your heart every time he walked past you like you didn’t exist because you had developed a crush on him since the first time you saw him a few months ago. When you would put a little extra effort into your appearance every morning because he made you feel little butterflies fluttering in the pit of your stomach every time you would even cross paths. 

When you did catch him staring at you, the weight of his eyes unmistakable, your heart rate would increase to match the flutters in your stomach, your cheeks heating under his gaze. He would look away immediately as if thrown out of his trance and catapulted into what he truly felt for you.

Disdain. Disgust. Maybe a little lust. 

God, you hated Bucky Barnes. You hated how you didn’t hate him, not even when he dismissed you somehow even more than he ignored everyone else. 

You were going to share a bed with Nat. Bucky and Sam could get the room with two beds because, of course, that was a reasonable conclusion. 

Apparently fucking not.

“I am not sharing a bed with him!” you screeched at Sam and Nat indignantly while the smug pair stood with faux innocent expressions. They needed you and Bucky to sort out whatever tension was between them by any means necessary.

They stayed silent, and you, ever the chatterbox today, decided to refuse. “Nat, I can’t sleep in the same room as him. He hates me! I can’t sleep when I’m stressed!” You whined, pleading with your best friend to take some pity on you. She knew better than anyone what you felt for Bucky, and she also knew love better than anyone when she saw it. 

Sam and Bucky walked a few steps ahead as you approached your door. 

“Sweetie, you and me are the only ones keeping up comms with Steve and Maria. It makes sense for us to be split up tonight so we can at least direct these morons at the same time and handle any issues faster than we’d be able to if we shared a room and they were in the other one.” Natasha knew she was right, and Sam fought back a smirk as their plan was falling into fruition, given the look on your face.

Bucky remained quiet as if he could not possibly care less if you slept on top of him in bed or a ditch.

You were this close to wishing the latter was your inevitable fate. 

“I hate it when you’re right.” As you approach the doors, you mutter and watch Sam take out the room keys.

Sam offers a small smile as Bucky walks in before you, patting you on the head and giving you a forehead kiss, “sweet dreams, pumpkin,” before shutting the door behind you as you roll your eyes.

“I’m not sleeping on the floor.” Bucky’s voice cut through the uncomfortable silence that had fallen after the lock clicked. His voice was raspy because he hadn’t used it in a while, and you barely held back the shiver that ran down your spine at his tone. 

You take one look at the fraying carpet and decide that it has been years since this floor had some TLC. You look up at him to find his heavy-set eyes already on you, “I’m not sleeping on the floor either.” 

His jaw clenches, and another unreadable emotion swirls in his eyes as he replies, “Guess that settles it, then.” 

You roll your eyes and huff out that you’re jumping in the shower, not waiting for his reply- not that there was one. The water takes a while to warm up, and in the meantime, you peel your clothes off of yourself, dirtied by rainwater and the dirt, debris, and sweat that had accumulated earlier. You step into the shower and try to enjoy the feel of warm water cascading over your sore body. 

You rarely made it onto the field as you genuinely preferred doing the background work, planning missions, writing up plans and procedures, assigning responsibilities to each Avenger and guiding them through the field while you stayed at the headquarters. Your muscles were undoubtedly aware of that fact, as you had to do a lot more hand-to-hand combat due to Bucky’s stupid mistake.

You couldn’t help but let your mind wander towards him, knowing you were completely bare just 10 feet away from him, how he would grunt in exertion and deliver calculated blows to his opponent. He was precisely your type: tall, brooding, broad shoulders, thick thighs. He didn’t speak that much, but his words were carefully weighed every time he did. He was so grumpy all the time, such a masculine man. You just loved it. 

You tried not to think about how he didn’t feel the same. And also about the fact that you would be sharing a bed with him. 

The water grew cold, and you realized you had been in the shower for upwards of twenty minutes. You shut off the water and wrap yourself in one of the towels provided by the hotel. You pulled out your pyjama set since there was a possibility that you would have to stay somewhere tonight due to the heavy rain. You didn’t think you were sleeping with Bucky, or you would have grabbed something a bit more conservative. You slip into the white tank top and shorts with a dainty floral design. You mentally prepared yourself to make a bee-line for the bed so you wouldn’t have to face Bucky while wearing next to nothing. 

A few feet away, Bucky was scrolling through the shitty channels playing on the shitty TV, ignoring the way his heart raced when the bathroom door unlocked and you emerged from the small room. He tried so hard not to stare at your outfit, unable to ignore the way all the blood in his body rushed to his dick when your tiny shorts rolled up even higher as you innocently bent over to check over your work laptop for any updates. 

“You really gonna wear that?” He scoffs and immediately realizes it didn’t exactly come out as playful as he would have liked. He winces at himself as you put the laptop back into its case and turn around to face him, and he can't stop himself from quickly glancing over your body. 

Crossing your arms under your chest, unintentionally drawing his attention to your tits, you scoff at him. “If I knew I was gonna be stuck in this shithole with you, then I would have made sure to wear a fucking hazmat suit.” 

“Relax, sweetheart, I’m not gonna bite.” He smirked, finally deciding on a channel he liked and turning his attention to it as you stood and stared at him, mouth open because out of all the things you expected him to say, that was not one of them, especially not with the flirtatious lilt to his voice. 

“Do not- do not tell me to relax! And don’t call me that! And- and ugh!” You retort weakly, strutting the few steps it took to get to the other side of the bed, 

Bucky licks his lips as you lay down next to him with your back towards him. Still huffing and puffing like the brat you were. 

He snorts at you, glancing at his watch and turning the TV off. 

“Do not snort at me, James.” Your voice comes out sharp, and he snorts again. 

“Tell me again what I can’t do, sweetheart? " he asks in a mockingly sweet voice. It makes you sick to your stomach.

 With desire.

You ignore him and tug the small comforter towards you, the bed suddenly feeling really small, with Bucky’s large frame taking up more than half of it. 

“Quit stealing the covers.” He grunts out, tugging them back towards him and leaving you bare and exposed to the cool air of the room. You gasp and sit up., using all your force to pull the covers back towards you, and even though you both know he let go, you still stick your tongue out at him. 

He grumbles something under his breath, and you smile victoriously. You’ll let the covers go eventually; you need to bask in your victory for a few minutes. Your mind begins to relax as you snuggle into the bed before you hear a sharp exhale, and somehow, you go from facing the dim wall to being pinned under Bucky. His frame entirely dwarfs yours, and the only light filtering in the room was the street lights and moon, the thin curtains doing nothing to block the shine. You shriek as you’re manhandled so quickly and forced to look into Bucky’s now dark blue eyes.

“Enough. I’ve had enough.” He growls, his hand pinning both your wrists down, and you have to fight yourself to keep in all tells of how aroused you are by the situation. 

“You’re such a fucking brat,” he continues. “Didn’t shut up for two hours straight. Always think you’re right. Always act like you’re smarter than everyone. Always fucking teasing me with your slutty fucking outfits.” He looks down at your tank top, almost angry when he sees your nipples poking through the thin material, but he doesn’t give you a chance to say anything.

Because now, Bucky’s talking. And he’s going to make sure you hear each and every word. 

“You think I don’t see the way you look at me?” 

A squeak escapes your lips as he presses his body down on yours.

“You think I can’t hear the way your heart rate picks up when I’m around?” His head drops lower, and his voice drops even lower, pulling a whimper from your parted lips. Your mind is spinning as you realize you may not have been as discreet as you thought you were. You entirely forgot to consider the fact that Bucky is a supersoldier, with enhanced hearing.

His rumbling voice cuts through your flurry of thoughts, “You think I can’t fucking smell you?” He practically sneers at you, and you must be a sick, sick person with the way you’re sure you’ve never been more wet in your life. “You think I can’t smell the way you drip from this little pussy every time I walk in the room? Every time someone mentions my goddamn name? I can smell her right now sweetheart. You like me forcing you down don’t you?” His breath fans over your face as you’re forced to focus on him, his body and his scent and his voice overwhelming you. Your body shudders when he gently rocks his crotch against yours, your eyes rolling back into your head. 

“What baby? Cat got your tongue now? You were being such a brat to me earlier.” He grunts, squeezing your cheeks and jaw in his free hand as you subconsciously buck your hips against his. 

“Bucky please…” You whine, squirming against his impenetrable hold. 

He smirks, “what’s wrong honey? You haven’t been this quiet or polite all day.”

“You- you’re being such a meanie! You knew the whole time and just never did anything about it!” You whine, your voice catching in your throat with each languid rock of his crotch angled perfectly against your clit. 

He laughs in your face and takes in the sight before him, your head thrown to the side as your chest heaves, your hips moving in tandem with his, your pouted lips swollen from being bitten so often. You were even more gorgeous like this and Bucky didn’t know that was possible.

“I wanted to see if you’d break first. But then, you just had to walk in here wearing this pathetic excuse of a pyjama set. And I just had to have you honey baby.”

You look back at him, a fiery expression in your eyes, “I don’t think that’s the real reason. I think you just wouldn’t be able to handle me. I think you can’t fuck me the way I need to be.” You spit back, not wanting to submit without a fight despite knowing that was exactly the direction this was going. 

In an instant Bucky’s metal hand was on your throat, squeezing enough to make your eyes blur for a second as you let out a whimper. “Is that right honey? You think I’ve never dealt with a rotten brat like you before? I know you pretend to put up a fight, I know you’re two strokes away from cumming all over yourself just from a little dry-humping. I know brats like you crave attention, but baby when you finally get it you better not run away? You got that?” He asks earnestly, his eyes locking on yours. 

“Do your worst James.” 

The second the words leave your mouth, his lips are on yours. The kiss is unlike any you’ve had before, it’s immediately messy and passionate, his tongue sliding in yours as he takes the lead, swallowing all your mewls and whimpers, finally letting go of your wrists and your fingers immediately go to his cropped hair, tugging on the short strands as he dominates you. You scramble to pull your shorts down but his hands flick your wrists away, giving you a glare.

“Did I say you could take these off, huh slut?” 

You whimper and shake your head no, finding yourself wanting to submit to him all too quickly.

He slides his briefs down to reveal his cock. You actually drooled a little at the sight of his length and girth, with beads of pre-cum glistening in the dim light of the room. You can’t control yourself as your hands go to wrap around his length, barely able to hold him in your hands as he hisses, bucking his hips into your hands before swatting them away once again.

“You don’t get to touch honey baby. Not yet at least. You yelled at me for hours today, it really hurt my feelings you know.” He muses, beginning to rub his length against your white shorts that are completely drenched through, your pussy sensitive and responsive. “I don’t think you deserve to be fucked sweetheart. You deserve to have this cunt rubbed on and came on. Just used like a cum rag.” He goes a little further, reading your reaction and when your back arches as much as his beefy body allowed you to, he knows you liked it. 

“Please James please I’m sorry, I’ll be good I swear!” You whine, your voice rising in pitch as his bare cock slides up and down the length of your pussy, and even through the layer seperating you, it was euphoric.

“I dunno honey, might have to beg and cry a little more and I’ll see how nice I’m feelin’ tonight.” He smiles cockily, knowing he’s got you exactly where he wants you. Almost instantly your eyes are watering as you clutch his biceps, morphing your features into big doe eyes and pouted lips, jutting your chest out in an attempt to persuade him further. “I’m sorry for bein’ a brat and yelling at you. I’m sorry for talking back and- and I need you James. Need you to fuck me please I wanted it for so long!” You drag your sentence and bite your lip, tears spiling onto your cheeks. 

He inhales sharply at the sound of your begging, stilling his hips for a moment as he restrains himself from cumming before he’s even seen your bare pussy. And in the next second he ripping your shorts to shreds, making you shriek and you can’t even get a reaction out before he spits onto your already soaked cunt, watching his spit mingle with your own arousal. You moan at the feeling, your hold twitching and practically begging to be filled. 

Bucky breathes in your scent since it envelopes his nostrils without any restrictions for the first time. When he opens his eyes again and sees your hazy expression he decides he can’t wait. He’s not gonna take it slow because he needs to feel you clench around him right now. His flesh index finger teases your pulsing hole, shoving the tip of his finger inside you as you whine, legs spreading for him on instinct. “Fuck she’s just begging to be stuffed isn’t she? Just aching to have my cock stretch her open.” He groans, dropping his forehead to yours as you chant breathy yes’s, mouth falling open and tears continuing down your face as he finally spreads you open on his cock. 

You have never felt so full in your life. Bucky was absolutely larger than average, in all ways. And it was exactly what you had been craving. He moans as you clench around him, your hole trying to push him out but pull him in at the same time. Before you know it he’s balls deep inside of you, your cream coating the hairs at the base of his length as you moan loudly, uncaring of the fact that Sam and Natasha were just a paper-thin wall away.

Your nails dug crescents into Buckys bulging biceps as he allowed you both a few moments to adjust to each other. “Oh my god Bucky you’re so- I’m so full.” Your words are breathy and slurred, and Bucky presses a kiss to each of your cheeks as he slowly grinds his hips into yours, not fully thrusting yet. 

“You know I want this to be more than just a quick fuck. When we get back I wanna take you out, wine and dine you properly.” He whispers against your lips, his hands and voice gentle compared to his earlier disposition. 

You nod your head in agreement, “I want that too Bucky, but I need you to fuck me right now.” 

He laughs, pressing a kiss to your cheek before pulling almost entirely out of you, allowing your hole to stretch around his tip before he slams into you, making your back arch and all the breath from your lungs dissipates. You squeal his name as he begins fucking into you with little care to be gentle. Your hands scramble to hold on as the headboard slams into the wall with every push and pull of his hips.

“I thought you said I couldn’t handle you honey baby. But look at you now, so stupid on my dick and just taking what I give you.” He mocks you, his metal hand finding its way to your throat once again and squeezing, relishing in the way you cunt clenches against him when he does. You cry out louder than before and he hisses, slapping his palm over your mouth. He grunts through clenched teeth, “shut the fuck up. You want Sam and Nat to hear you crying for my dick huh? What would they say if they saw strong and independent you, stretched open and cock-drunk, pinned under me and crying for me?”

Your eyes clench shut as your words are unintelligible and muffled by his palm. He coos at you and clicks his tongue, making you shiver. “Don’t think too much honey baby, just take it. This is what you’re meant to do, not be a brat. Just take my cock.” He groans, speeding up his thrusts as the sound of skin slapping skin and your wetness squelching fill the room. 

Your chest begins heaving as the oxygen to your brain takes more effort to get there. You were being propelled to your orgasm as you begin chanting the fact, your voice so pornographic and unlike your own but you can’t even find it in yourself to be shocked.

“‘M gonna cum, m gonna cum! You’re gonna make me cum please Daddy please!” The words leave your lips faster than you can process, and what was about to erupt into the most powerful orgasm you have ever had, was left denied and unsatisfied and you cried out, beginning your protests when Bucky flipped you around, your back to his chest as he shoved himself back inside of you. He pulled you up by your hair and brought his lips to your ears, his cock hitting an even deeper angle as you struggled to keep up.

“What did you call me?” He growls, not letting up his thrusts but expecting you to answer.

Your brain struggles to process his words, but once you do you’re quick to realize you let the word you often used in your fantasies about Bucky slip. You immediately apologize, thinking he must be off-put by your lewdness. 

He cuts your scrambled apologies off with his heavy voice, “say it again. That’s what you’ve been really dying to call me isn’t it. Just needed Daddy to take what he needed from you didn’t you?”

“Oh fuck.” Your head falls against his chest as he wraps his bicep around your throat, forcing you upright, “yes Daddy, needed my Daddy to take care of me.” You slur out, Your hands clutching his bicep as his metal fingers begin playing expertly with your throbbing clit. 

“That’s right slut, I’m your Daddy. I’m your fucking Daddy.” He impales you on his dick, his cock reaching all the rights spots as your brain truly begins to leave you, all you can do is succumb to the pleasure Bucky is inflicting on you. Your pussy clenches harder than it has before as your orgasm builds in the pit of your stomach, you try to run from it but Bucky’s strong hold doesn’t allow you to move even a slither away. 

“Oh what does this little pussy clenching mean huh? Tell Daddy baby, tell Daddy what it means when I feel you clench around my cock huh? You gonna cum? Gonna make a mess all over yourself like the stupid little toy you are?” His voice is breathless in your ear as he nears his own high, your body shaking as your high begins building to impossible heights. 

You slur out something that resembles his title and an exclamation that you’re gonna cum, and his metal hand slaps your clit once, and then twice, his gravelly voice in your ear degrading you, and your high explodes from your body. You feel it everywhere as you don’t register anything except for pleasure. Pleasure like you’ve never felt before. Bucky drops his forehead to your shoulder, muttering your name through clenched teeth as he calls you a good girl, before stuffing you full of his cum. Thick white ropes paint your swollen walls and it only amplifies your high as you struggle to breathe, your mind and body overwhelmed and overstimulated as Bucky pumps you full of his cum. 

He gently lets you down and your limp body manages to cling onto him, needing to feel him close to you as you reel from your explosive orgasm. He shushes you, kissing your forehead, cooing at you, praising you. Everything you need to avoid experiencing a negative subdrop since he did just put you into such a submissive mindset. 

It takes a couple minutes of his tender words and touches for you to come back to yourself, and when you do he smiles sweetly at you. Pulling out of you and shushing your whines, as he reaches over to his nightstand where there were a few clean hand towels, and he cleans you up, mindful of your sensitivity and he places a kiss right above your clit, his beard scratching the sensitive button making you shudder and mewl. 

He wraps you up in his arms and pulling you closer, nuzzling your cheek with his nose as you blink at him. 

“I was being serious you know, I don’t want this to be a one and done thing. I wanna be yours, if you’ll have me.” He adds, his voice trailing off and you put your hand on his stubbled cheek before pressing your lips to his. 

“That’s all I’ve wanted since I first saw you.” You say softly, basking in being so close to him and having all his attention on you. 

He smiles brightly, pressing his lips to yours with more fervour and flutters in his heart. “You’re mine now sweetie, stuck with me forever. No return policy.” He teases. 

“I think you’re the one who’s stuck with me after you just dicked me down like that. No way am I getting rid of you.” You mumble sleepily, clinging to him as he smiles, pressing a kiss to your forehead and watching you slip into a dreamland state.

For the first time in years, Bucky sleeps a full eight hours. And he wakes up with you by his side.

---------

The next morning, when it’s 9 AM, and you waddle onto the jet, Bucky tailing close behind you, a hand on your back to support your weight, Natasha and Sam share knowing looks, and Sam quickly texts Steve and Tony. He let them know they were on their way, and they owed him and Nat 100 bucks because their plan worked.

[you-have-a-metal-arm]

Drunk Confession

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Word Count: 2.3k

Trope: Friends to Lovers

Warnings: Mentions of alcohol

Summary: Bucky gets drunk and confesses to you

Author’s Note: Please do not copy or translate my work. English is not my first language, so please understand grammar or spelling mistakes. This fic was inspired by the song, Drunk Text by Henry Moodie. I appreciate every feedback! Thank you for reading!

Since Bucky joined the Avengers, you and Bucky have been friends for eternity. The two of you hit it off when you met, and considering Bucky a quiet person, as soon as the two of you you started opening up, Steve couldn’t be more surprised. You two would flirt whenever you had a chance, but both of you were scared to admit the feelings that were so obvious to the other team members. You and Bucky would be on missions together, fighting for each other’s lives, caring about each other’s safety more than anything. After successful missions, Tony would have a party, inviting nearly half the population of New York. As everyone leaves, and the team is the only member left, they would have small games like Truth or Dare, Seven Minutes in Heaven, and so much more, leaving Tony to wonder if he’s dealing with a bunch of seventeen-year-olds.

This mission was one of the last missions the team had to deal with at the Main base of Hydra located in Russia. The mission was over quicker than Tony’s plan, leaving everyone more time to relax.

When everyone returned to the compound, Tony decided to have a party just for the Avengers. He informed the members to wear something casual. Some left for their rooms, and some went to the medic to get superficial wounds patched up.

“Let’s get drunk!!!!!!!!!!”
 Peter shouted since it was his first party where he could legally be drinking. Tony looked deadly into Peter’s eyes, warning him to act like an adult, leaving Natasha to smirk. You weren’t feeling good and remembered that Bucky usually did not enjoy staying out at parties, where he is forced to socialize; you thought the two of you would be having a movie night in your room, but you were wrong. Bucky wanted to stay and drink, so you decided to go back to your room and sleep early, but as soon as you were about to leave, Bucky grabbed your wrist.

“Stay.. Please”

He told you with his puppy eyes looking at you, and you couldn’t say no. So you silently sat down next to him, where he held your hand and absent-mindedly drew circles on the back of your hand.

“Just get a room, the two of you! We have a teenager in this room.”

Teased Sam, earning a dramatic eye roll from Bucky and Peter.

“I’m not a teenager, look! I drink! I’m an adult now.”
 Peter told Sam, showing him the bottle he had in his hands.

“Says who doesn’t even have facial hair.”

Muttered Tony. Steve and Sam were cracking up, and Peter was left annoyed.

Bucky never enjoyed drinking. Well, one, he couldn’t get drunk from his serum, and two, even if he did get drunk in some way, the hangover he had the next day and the blimming headache would remind him of the bloody chair. But for some reason, Bucky was drinking the Asgardian beer Thor brought as a present. You were worried for his sake by tomorrow, so you constantly whispered to him to stop drinking, but he wouldn’t listen.

“I just have a lot in my mind, Y/N… So just let me drink. I know the consequences ”

Bucky told you to calm you down as you were worrying too much.

“You can tell me what’s in your mind; don’t bottle them up just with alcohol.”

Bucky shook his head and drank up bottles of beer and strong whiskey. Realizing you had no power to stop him from drinking, you decided to let him be and have his way of controlling his stress.

You talked with Nat as Wanda and Vision left to go to bed. You then realize that it is already two o’clock in the morning. No one seemed to be leaving soon, so you just continued the chat with Natasha and Clint, hearing about Clint’s family and Natasha’s sister. As the conversation continued, your eyes started to feel so heavy that you decided to head back to the room. As you were trying to leave, Sam called you out.

“Y/N, cyborg is too drunk to return to his room alone. Steve’s too drunk, and obviously, I’m too terrified if I ‘invade his privacy.’”

Sam mentioned sarcastically, and you nodded. You remembered Bucky hated people entering his room, even when it was just for help, and you were the only exception in the team.

You excused the both of you, nearly carrying Bucky back to his room.

“Bucky, you’re too drunk!!! I told you to stop drinking.”

You scolded Bucky, but he just widely smiled at you.

“What are you smiling at, mister?”

“You.”

He replied so simply yet in a flirty way that made you blush.

While he was rambling stupid stuff, you had already carried him to his room and tucked him into bed. He grabbed your wrist when you were about to get him a glass of water to wake him up.

“Y/N? Did I ever tell you I’m in love with you?”

Your eyes widened. You developed a crush on Bucky for about five months now, but you were too terrified to tell him your feelings and get rejected to lose a best friend, so you had to hide your feelings deep down. But Bucky confessing his feelings to you while he’s half asleep? Your head was running miles an hour, but Bucky’s voice stopped you from overthinking.

“I’m madly in love with you, Y/N. Maybe I fell for you the moment I shook your hands, or… when you came into my room with cookies at 4 am when I woke up from a terrible nightmare, or even when you threw yourself in front of me to protect me from a gunshot, only to get yourself hurt. I think about you all the time; I think about you while eating lunch, I think about you before I go to sleep, and I think about you as soon as I wake up; you might think this is creepy, but I want to be with you, and I’m too scared if you’d find me too broken, that you’d find a reason to leave. I wanna have you so bad…”

You held his hands and kissed his forehead. You kept telling yourself;

‘He’s drunk, he’s drunk, he’s drunk’

“Buckaroo, you’re too drunk. Let’s get you to bed and talk about this in the morning, Okay?”

Bucky nodded and let go of your hand.

“Now let me go get you a glass of water. It will make you feel better a bit.”

You went to the kitchen, made a glass of water, and returned to his bed, but you couldn’t find him anywhere.

“Buck? Bucky, where are you?”

You turned on the lights and saw Bucky sitting on the couch, playing random chords on his guitar. As Bucky had therapy sessions, he was recommended to learn an instrument or make a hobby unrelated to fighting, and he decided to learn the guitar. Having YouTube, he could learn guitar in his room without anyone knowing. But sometimes he would play some chords and sing you some songs.

“Y/N, come here. I’m not drunk.”

Bucky’s voice sounded calm, which made you wonder if he wasn’t drunk. He wasn’t slurring anymore, and his eyes seemed more alert than a while ago. You followed his instructions and sat down beside him, and he started singing a song.

I wish I was who you drunk texted at midnight

Wish I was the reason you stay up ’til 3

And you can’t fall asleep

Waiting for me to reply

I wish I was more than just someone you walk by

Wish I wasn’t scared to be honest and open

Instead of just hoping

You’d feel what I’m feeling inside

Oh, and here we go again

Destroy myself to keep a friend

Hiding away, ‘cause I was afraid you’d say no

I wonder if I cross your mind

Half as much as you do mine

If I tell you the truth

What will I lose I don’t know

I wish I’d sent you that drunk text at midnight

I was just sacred it would ruin our friedship

But I really meant it

I wonder how you would reply

Bucky finished singing. He sang the last verse, nearly asleep, and as soon as the song finished, he fell asleep on the couch. You were left flabbergasted, feeling an undescribable feeling in your stomach. But you noticed if Bucky spent the night like this, he’d probably be in misery in the morning, so you decided to take the guitar away and at least make him comfy on the couch, with cushions and blankets. As you lifted his head to put the blanket below him, he brought you down and nuzzled into your neck. You were surprised and tried to get out of his grip, but he pulled you closer as you tried to escape, sending shivers down your spine. You fell asleep in his arms, and it was cozier than you thought.

You woke up earlier than Bucky and decided to make him breakfast because you knew he’d have a massive hangover when he woke up, so you prepared to create him a bowl of oatmeal with sliced banana and chicken noodle soup just in case.

Soon, you heard Bucky tossing and turning around the couch, and soon, you saw him wake up. He looked exhausted, with his hair all over the place. He frowned as he looked around his room, but as his eyes landed on you, his frown turned into a colossal smile.

‘See? He doesn’t remember a thing; he was just drunk. Let’s get over it.’

You thought to yourself.

“Good morning, Bucky; you were so drunk yesterday, like really drunk. I was scared you’d blow up.”

“Good thing I didn’t.”

“I warned you not to drink that much! You hate drinking, Buck!”

You warned him, and he nodded. You offered him a glass of water to save him from his misery. You were about to return to the kitchen to finish the food, but Bucky pinned you.

“You said we’d discuss it today.”

You tried to put on a normal face, acting as if you didn’t remember anything from yesterday.

"What?"

You questioned innocently as Bucky was about to pour his heart into you.

"I'm in love with you. Can you be my girlfriend? I was in love with you forever. And I was scared I'd lose you. I... I love you so much."

You were utterly dumbfounded. Words left your mouth. You thought it was the alcohol speaking, not himself, but as you see him all sober up, you realize it was him all along. As he confessed his feelings to you, the space between you was filled with silence, and the few seconds felt like a million years of them.

You were in shock and internally screaming from joy, and Bucky was so nervous not hearing a word from your mouth. He started overthinking, worrying if he had just lost his best friend, just from his stupid emotions that he couldn’t help but keep to himself.

"I- If you don't wanna be with me, it's totally fine. I respect your decision. And- and if you want me out of your life, I will walk out of it. And if you, if you hate me, you can, and- and... I'm sorry for ruining everything like this. I shouldn't have said that. I'm so sorry. You can leave if you like, I won't bother you with my stupid jokes, I won't sing you weird songs, I won’t keep you awake at night from nightmares, and- and”

He was rambling, and you stopped him with a deep kiss. As your lips crashed with his, his eyes widened and pushed you away in shock.

"What was that? Why did you kiss me? Just to rub it in that I'd never have you?"

You loved seeing him so nervous in front of you. The Bucky that everyone in the compound knew was a man with no emotions who was always stiff and private, but seeing him in this state made you smile. He looked so adorable. He was so adorable that it made you question how he could be a deadly assassin.

"To show you I love you too idiot."

You replied, hoping it would stop him from wandering in his thoughts that were running miles an hour. Bucky was momentarily speechless and pulled you in for another deep kiss.

“Does this mean you’re mine?”

Bucky asked while he pulled you in closer and nuzzled into your neck.

“Yes, idiot I’m yours. I’ve always been yours.”

You told him in between kisses. His tongue entered your mouth, and your tongues moved in sync.

“God, this is the best day of my life. I’ll never let you go Y/N”

He whispered.

Bucky was on top of you, and he started to kiss your neck, leaving a trail down to your clavicle. You whimpered and loved every single second of it.

“Don’t you smell something burning, doll?”

Bucky asked, and you realized the chicken noodle soup you left on the fire.

“Oh shit.”

You ran back to the kitchen, and Bucky followed you and hugged you from behind, snuggling into your neck as he absorbed your scent.

“You made something for me, sweetheart?”
 “I did, ‘cause I know how much you hate headaches, and I wanted to soothe it for a bit. I wanted to make you feel better.”

“You want me to make me feel better? But you already are, baby.”

Bucky told you with a cheeky grin and offered to get food in the common-kitchen. You went downstairs together, having hands in hands, interlocking your fingers. Bucky’s face looked better than ever, and Tony gave you death glares as he silently asked you what happened overnight. You just smiled at him.

“Since when did cyborg wake up with a grin after a heavy drinking session?”
 Sam asked, but Steve poked him when he caught on to what was happening. Steve gave Bucky a knowing glare.

“Maybe I like alcohol,”
 Bucky whispered as you were having breakfast. Your spine shivered again, and you had butterflies in your stomach again. You realized that you weren’t just in love with him, you were in fact, madly, in love with him.

Thank you for reading!!

[shirefantasies]

hello :) im new on your page so im not extremely familiar with what you're going through but I'd still like to wish you a smooth recovery before saying anything else.

considering your condition you can absolutely take as long as you need on this request or just not do it at all but i just NEEDED to get this idea off my chest

so last night i read your LOTR characters and how many children they would have hcs and now i absolutely cannot get the idea of frodo with a little girl out of my head :(

just imagine a hobbit toddler with frodos curls like running around and being silly ☹️☹️☹️

anyways if you could elaborate on that or just some hcs of frodo as a dad in general would be so greatly appreciated :)

i wish you a smooth recovery and i hooe that you're alright

Thank you so much! I'm sorry this is an OLLLLLDDDD request and I can't remember when this was originally put in but it would be so funny if it was pre-emergency room trip 😂 but no matter what all healthy here finally 🥰 I hope it's ok that I decided to expand on this a little for everyone!

The Hobbits as Dads (Wife!Reader)

Frodo

✧ As I've mentioned, Frodo wants a smaller family, so you end up with two children, a daughter first, then a son. Both of whom just love their sweet father to pieces!

✧ Frodo and your daughter especially are just joined at the hip. She’ll sit on his desk swinging her legs while he writes or illustrates, asking him what he’s doing until he’s basically reading to her and working all at once!

✧ She chases him around the meadows, giggling as he lets himself almost be caught only to turn around and swoop her up into the air with a wide smile of his own!

✧ Frodo gets so soft whenever he holds your son, who looks just like you! Your daughter has his eyes, but your son is the spitting image of you and he just loves it. He could watch you just sitting there with your little boy in his arms watching forever, but in the end his feet carry him right to your sofa to snuggle in, your little girl on his heels!

✧ Dances with your daughter at every party, even when she is little and has to stand atop his feet as they twirl.

✧ Every morning Frodo wakes your children up with a kiss to the forehead and it almost brings tears to his eyes sometimes at the way your little boy absolutely leaps into his arms to be carried out to breakfast, the biggest smile on his little face, so reminiscent of his beloved wife's.

Sam

✧ The absolute king of making all his children feel heard despite having so many! He's invested in so many hobbies, but the children make him the dearest things, so it's ever so worth it.

✧ For example, Elanor pens the most amazing tales and Sam is always talking about her way with words. Saying how she certainly didn't get it from him! It must be from her brilliant mother. Having heard stories of Gandalf's fireworks, Hamfast works tirelessly to unlock their secret, creating his first little sparklers just in time for his father's birthday party! Sam tears up a little at this.

✧ The father who carries as many kids at a time as he physically can. One hanging around his neck, one on his back, and he strains to lift the ones dangling from his arms, too.

✧ So sweet whenever his children cry that they go to him just as often as you! Takes them in his arms and always has the kindest, most uplifting words ready.

✧ Has a tree, bush, or patch of flowers named for and aided in tending by each child as they chose their favorite.

✧ All the ladies of the Shire giggle at the sight of Sam wrangling three little ones at the market, trying so hard to keep his words gentle as he's holding another of their siblings and they want to put their hands on everything. "But that's simply not polite, now is it?"

Merry

✧ He’s always wanted at least one son and one daughter, and let me tell you: his daughter will have him wrapped around her finger.

✧ Even if she looks just like you, your daughter has Merry’s smile and as a baby, she mirrors his expressions exactly. You catch him playing peekaboo with her all the time and making faces just to see them spreading across her soft cheeks.

✧ Making toys for his kids becomes a passion of Merry’s. He spends hours carving a little wooden sword for your son that looks as close to the one gifted to him from his fellow soldiers of Rohan.

✧ The dad who takes his kids on outings so mama can have a break! After making you breakfast, Merry runs off with the little ones to go beery picking and brings them back a complete mess of dirt and juice splatters, but also grinning excitedly and holding up brimming baskets of their harvest.

✧ Congratulates your daughter the first time an angry mother complains to him about her slapping her son, who had pushed her down. “That’s right. Don’t let anyone treat you like that.” Turning to you, Merry grins, eyes all aglow with admiration. “Hear that? She’s a fighter!”

✧ Bedtime is a whole production. Bath time, a story, time laying with each child to talk about anything they want, tucking them in…and you can pry it all from Merry’s cold dead hands.

Pippin

✧ The dad who thinks all of his children are so neat, no ifs, ands, or buts, and is best friends with them all. Also the proudest father who cannot stop talking about them all into any remotely available set of ears.

✧ Your firstborn son is Pippin’s best friend, running as soon as he can walk and toddling after his father anywhere he can go, and Pippin always welcomes his company!

✧ Lifts his young ones up onto the Green Dragon tables too and lets them show off their moves or simply holds them while he jumps a little more gently! Your older son is jigging at his side, your second son leaping, and your little girl is on his hip all while Merry and his son dance next door and you watch with the baby in your arms!

✧ Encourages his children’s off-the-wall imaginations with all sorts of questions about their little worlds and creatures and of course taking on some of their roles when they need him for a game.

✧ Chaotic apple picking trips with the whole family, which comes to total you, Pippin, and all six of the kids running around like beheaded chickens between the trees and trying to show you the best apple! The oldest boys start tossing them back and forth like a ball, but they also help you bake pies by corralling the little ones and making the process fun for them. Pippin brings the baby in and holds him, teasingly pretending like he’s going to let his little hands steal your apple pieces.

✧ The father who learns every goofy magic trick to make the kids laugh. Always pulling something from behind their ears.

Bilbo

✧ Had you asked him only a handful of years prior, he would have said no children in the house, thank you, but here he is now having tea parties and making boats to float in the stream with your daughter.

✧ The most devoted dad, if a little overprotective. Always hovering behind her, hands raising over her curly little head the moment any possible danger could strike.

✧ Teaches his daughter all the proper tea etiquette after he buys her the perfect little set, fretting a bit when she spills but grinning so proudly as she pours him his little cuppa! They have tea parties all the time and Bilbo addresses all her dolls by name. She insists, after all.

✧ He also takes her on a lot of “adventures” that mostly consist of walking through the woods on the edges of the Shire and picnicking on bread and cold meat and cheese from your larder alongside the fruits they pick.

✧ Is very disconcerted when your daughter insists that not only is she going to visit the Lonely Mountain with her papa someday, she is also going to marry a dwarf. Guess she really enjoyed his stories!

✧ Your daughter knows how to do everything. Mend handkerchiefs? Definitely. Finally take that crack at the plumbing? She's right there with her father. Botany? But of course, for how else will they know what all the books they read are describing! Fighting? You both are teaching her that. Your daughter will never be afraid to take on anything with you two for her parents!

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[kissingkiszka]

Choosing The Road - GVF x Reader

Words:1.8k+

Summary: Reader goes on a roadtrip with her lifelong best friends, and they are all after her heart.

CW: MDNI, 18+, fluff, drinking, cursing, can be viewed as both platonic &/or romantic, flirting i guess?, traveling idrk! Love triangle but all 4 of the boys are after reader (love pentagon?) not proofread

This is a bit of a short one I wasn’t actually going to post but here we are! I wrote this one on the way to my Starcatcher show :)

I may do a part 2 to this where reader ends up with one of them so lmk if you’d like to see that and who she’d end up with!

—————————————————————

It was your second day on the road, and it was anything but boring, especially being with the guys. They had been your best friends for years now and a roadtrip with them was something you had always wanted to do, and now was the chance.

Everyone had pitched in a little bit to cover the cost of a rental RV, and everyone took turns driving, except you. You were more than happy to, however the boys wanted you to sit back and enjoy the ride. Sam even decided to bring Rosie with him, which led to even more fun.

Even though you had just gotten on the road yesterday, there were already countless trips to truck stops that had been made. It was always the same routine, too. Sam would get out to stretch his legs, play with Rosie, and photograph the surrounding area. Josh would hop out, take a short walk in the surrounding patches of grass and pick up any flowers, rocks, or sticks he had found nearby. He was really good at journaling and the pieces of nature he had found made for excellent journaling supplies. Danny always made a trip to the bathroom and made sure everyone had their snacks and enough water to last them to the next truck stop. Jake had recently taken up the hobby of writing poetry, so he would sit outside and take in as much scenery as possible to later write about. And for you, well you would join each of them in their respective activities depending on your mood.

“Let the good times roll!” Sam announced, putting the camper in reverse. He had just taken over for Jake as driver.

“Who wants to listen to some blues?” Jake asked, taking out his phone.

“You. Only you do, Jake.” Josh spat.

Jake plopped himself down in between you and Danny. Without a word, Danny handed him a water bottle and a small bag of crackers.

“Thanks bud.” Jake said, opening the bag.

Danny was definitely the mom friend, which made you laugh. The Kiszka boys always had a somewhat childish side. Although they were some of the most responsible and respectful men you knew, they always brought out your inner child, which was one of the reasons you were such great friends with them.

“This road trip is so fun. I can’t wait to make some more lifelong memories with my lifelong friends.” Danny smiled, picking his head up from the book he had been reading.

“I can’t wait to see where the road will take us. Bajabule!” Josh cheered, taking a beer can out of the mini fridge in the corner. “So many good vibes around us.”

This trip was so spontaneous, you didn’t even have a planned destination. You guys just wanted to drive around the country until you felt like going back to Nashville.

“Jake, could you hand me my water, please?” You ask sweetly.

“Of course, love.” He smiles before turning around to get your pink metal water bottle. Before he could grab it, Danny scoops it up and delivers it to you.

“Here you are, m'lady.” Danny says as you graciously accept the water.

“I was going to get it for her-” Jake begins.

“You snooze, you lose, buddy.” Danny lovingly pats him on the shoulder.

The various sights you had seen eventually turned into mountain tops that looked identical to one another.

After a few hours of driving straight, Sam finally pulled into a parking lot. You lifted your head out of a book you were reading to take in the new location.

“A truck stop? Another one?” Josh stands up with his hands on his hips.

“I have to pee!” Sam argued. “Plus, I don’t want Rosie pooping on the floor, or we might have to pay extra for that.”

“Good call.” Jake nodded, standing up.

“I need to stretch my legs anyways.” Danny added, walking towards the door.

Sam got Rosie on her leash and then made his way out of the RV, and everyone followed after him.

“You want any snacks?” Josh leaned in, asking you.

“Me? Uh, maybe a coffee would do me some good.” You smile.

“You got it.” He reciprocated the warm smile and went inside to get snacks.

You followed him at a distance, going to quickly use the restroom.

After you used the restroom, you wandered around the truckstop for a bit. You walked over to a huge map on the wall, examining it carefully.

You quickly grabbed a pamphlet that read ‘Arkansas’ across the top in big blue lettering. You were planning on making a scrapbook of the road trip and figured you would be collecting any sorts of materials for it.

Even though you had been on the road for the past day, and you had no idea where you were, it was good to find out that you had at least made it out of Tennessee.

“Arkansas? Huh.” Danny came up behind you and rested a firm hand on your shoulder.

You jump back, startled. You let out a small chuckle. “Yeah, I was worried we’d still be in Tennessee.”

“Don’t worry about that, Y/N.” Danny laughed. “I think we’re coming pretty close to Oklahoma by now. Maybe if Josh could drive better, we’d be there by now.”

You nodded with a giggle.

“Well, I’m gonna go get a quick snack. You want anything?”

“No thanks, Josh is already getting me something.” You smiled. “I’m gonna get some fresh air for a bit.”

You left the truck stop, heading over to the RV. Sam was now outside with Rose. You headed over to them, bending down and greeting Rose with a few pets.

“She loves you.” Sam smiled as he watched you play with his beloved pet. “But who doesn’t? You're easy to love.”

“I could say the same for you, Sam.” You look up at him and go to stand.

“Yeah, right.” He chuckles, giving Rose a treat.

“You are.”

“Really?” He asks, his eyes going wide.

“Duh. You’re my best friend. Everybody loves you.”

“Awh.” He sighs and smiles to himself. You even catch a glimpse of him blushing, but he turns away before you can point it out.

You turn around, making your way back to the camper and notice Jake stepping inside.

When you get inside, you notice Jake sitting down on one side of the couch. He pats the spot next to him, signaling for you to join him on the couch.

“Hey.” He smiles.

“Hey.” You reply, sitting down.

He has his leather bound journal placed open in his lap. You take notice of the many words accompanying the pages.

He notices you looking at the pages as he looks down. “I've been busy.”

“Looks like it.” You nod. “What are you writing?”

“I’ve been working on some stuff. Some concepts for a new album. Some poetry. Y’know.” He admits.

“I see you’ve gotten a lot done?”

He laughs and glances down at the journal once more. “You can say that.”

You lean in a bit closer, getting more interested in hearing his ideas. “Does sight seeing give you inspiration? Is that why you’re always writing stuff down?”

“Well, I actually get a lot of my inspiration from you. Believe it or not.” He gives you a sweet smile.

“Jake,” you grin. “That’s so nice. Can I-”

“I don’t want you to see it yet. Only when it’s perfect.” He softly closes his journal and moves it to the side. “I only want you to see my top notch work.”

“Jake, I think all your work is top notch.”

“Thank you, Darl-”

As he finishes his sentence, Josh comes sauntering back into the vehicle.

“Your coffee, madam.” He dramatically puts his hand out, you take the coffee from him. “And I also threw in a bag of chips for you.”

“Thank you, Joshy.” You accept the snacks with a cheeky smile.

“No need to thank me,” He sits himself down on the couch across from you and Jake. “Especially over a small bag of chips and a coffee. I’d do anything for you.”

You giggle before Danny and Sam come piling back onto the RV, with Rose following closely behind on her leash.

“Alright, so who’s driving now?” Sam claps his hands together.

“I’ll drive.” Danny stands up. “Haven’t driven for a bit now.”

“I know there's a rest stop in about…50 miles.” Jake told him.

“Maybe we stop there for the night? Get some rest?” You inquired.

“Yes ma’am.” Danny nodded, sitting down behind the wheel.

“Getting rest at the rest stop!” Josh chimed in.

…

That night, the RV was parked at a rest stop next to a huge pond. It was off the highway and very peaceful. The RV bunks were anything but comfortable. You had been tossing and turning, not able to get any sleep. You thought for a minute before deciding on reading your book. That always helped you fall asleep easier. As you walk into the sitting area to retrieve your book, you see Josh’s silhouette on one of the couches.

“Josh?” You ask in a whisper, blinking back your lack of sleep.

“Oh!” he jumped back, startled. “What’re you doing up?”

“Can’t sleep. How ‘bout you?”

“That makes two of us.”

“Have you seen my book?” You ask, squinting in the darkness trying to find it.

He shakes his head. “Can’t say I have.”

“Dammit.” You sigh under your breath.

“Why so sad? Come join me outside.”

“For what?”

“I don’t know.” He shrugs. “Just feel like it. A night underneath the stars…?” He says unsurely.

You oblige and follow him outside.

He finds a nearby picnic table and lays down on top of it, looking up at the night sky.

“Lay with me.”

“Lay with you?”

“Yeah, c’mon.” He pats the spot next to you.

You lay next to him and stare at the sky as well. It’s silent for a few moments, as both of you are just admiring the sky and wondering what to talk about.

“So many stars out tonight. They’re all so bright too.”

“You’re the brightest star, though.”

“Says you.” You chuckle, your cheeks turning a slight shade of pink. “You’re literally the brightest star out there.”

“So I’m the sun?” He asks.

“The sun is still a star.” You nod matter of factly.

“You know what? if you asked me to, I would go up there, and catch all the stars…I’d bring them back down for you.” He admits, laying his hands against his chest.

“That’d be one big feat.”

He chuckles. “For you, it’d be nothing.”

“Thanks Josh…”

“You know, I’d do anything for you. I’m sure all of us would. We love you so much.” He sits there for a minute before sitting up with wide eyes. “Oh my god. That’d make for a good album name.” He smiles to himself before looking over at you, who’s long asleep by now.

[cloveroctobers]

OCTOBER PROMPTS 🎃 — 13. Tara Carpenter

A/N: The way y’all voted on that poll was a true landslide lol I guess I didn’t realize how huge the tara stans are. So here goes something for my final fall prompt, hope this doesn’t flop like scream 7 will 🤭🤫🫠 but this is a short and simple ending so I do hope you enjoy this.

PROMPTS are from HERE & HERE + I’m using: going to a pumpkin patch + “you look cold, do you want a hug?” + “you think someone died here?”

WARNINGS: slight language I think? Dark humor. Age-difference: with Tara being twenty-one and oc/reader being twenty-five/six + Chad and Tara never became a thing in this timeline!

<- read my previous october anthology prompt here.

⁺˚⋆｡°✩₊✧˖°. ☼ ⁺˚⋆｡°✩₊✧˖°. ☼ ⁺˚⋆｡°✩₊✧˖°. ☼ ⁺˚⋆｡°✩ ⁺˚

Being at a pumpkin patch in mid-November when the skies were painted like pale ice in a frozen lake and the trees lost their copper leaves for good was questionable for Tara. The air no longer had its crispness to it but it started to feel more along the lines of a wild animal taking bites out of your face here in New York. However Tara couldn’t find herself complaining—well despite the fact that Sam turned this into a group outing—Tara couldn’t wait to see Johnnie.

Johnnie was Sam’s age, older than Tara, and easily became likable in Tara’s eyes although Sam often gave Johnnie a hard time even in the beginning. Of course they still had to be cautious but Tara always stood on the fact that she just wanted to live life after it’s been at risk of being taken away for good. She wouldn’t be as naive as last year but something about Johnnie had Tara’s insides turning into mush—in a good way though—not in a decaying guts kind of way.

The train ride was recommended by Johnnie to her family’s farm from the city and that became a whole debacle between the friends, until Tara waved her phone in the air saying that she already purchased a ticket while the rest could spend forever trying to figure out what they wanted to do. Mindy found this humorous how whenever Johnnie was mentioned, Tara made it her mission to be tuned into the conversation if she checked out.

Mindy was the first to pick up on the signs before Tara did and took great pride in Tara coming to her first out of the core four. Chad would argue against that saying he was actually the first since Tara did start to vent when they pulled a all nighter together. However he actually had no clue who Tara could be talking about and ended up eavesdropping when she chatted to Mindy one afternoon when he was supposed to be studying…basically pick a twin to believe at this point.

Tara couldn’t wipe the smile off her face on the train ride, fingers rapidly flying over her screen to the dimpled grin on her face when she spotted Johnnie helping out at the entrance of her family’s pumpkin patch.

“They’re with me, cousin.” Johnnie informs the family member with hair as white as snow, before grabbing up the walkie to contact someone else to head to the front and help out, now being off the clock with her friends here.

“Can we get more free perks for Christmas?” Chad asks as they briefly embrace and Johnnie rolls her eyes.

Johnnie folded her arms, “Why? So you can continue bringing your flings around and eat their tongues instead of enjoying the scenery?”

Chad frowned, “who are these flings that you speak of? I’m here enjoying the pumpkins with my favorite sister.”

As he goes to toss an arm over the curly haired girl’s shoulder, she shoves him away, “save it for the jury, Chad. I saw you eyeing that pretty girl with the shell earrings and racer jacket not too long ago.”

“I mean…she could be the one.” Chad couldn’t even bother to deny his wandering eyes.

Sam, Mindy, and Tara all share a groan while Danny snickers at Chad’s usual antics before being elbowed by Sam.

“Hey Tara,” Johnnie says, falling into step with the smaller girl; after informing everyone of the many activities the farm included.

Tara smiles up at her, “Hey Johnnie…remind me why we’re going pumpkin hunting so late into the season?”

“Well…I’m having a Friendsgiving next weekend at my spot and…that maybe partly true but I also wanted to hang out with you again before that.” Johnnie was honest with this, which made Tara slowly nod her head in appreciation.

Johnnie used to attend the same university as the three, received her degrees, started her business of creating designs on amputee’s prosthetics and moved to New Jersey two months ago to purchase her own home. So her having her shit together was definitely inspiring (and not to mention attractive) in Tara’s eyes and although she didn’t have everything figured out herself, one thing she was sure of: spending time with Johnnie felt right, scary yet comfortable and safe.

“Ohhh that’s right, I almost forgot about that.” Tara widens her eyes in realization, cursing to herself that she actually did forget about this but knew she could blame it on being swamped in school work, while Johnnie stumbles.

With a hand on her chest, she sighs playfully, “you wound me carpenter.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” Tara replies with a longing stare as they approach the line in front of a few booths.

Johnnie leans towards Tara who doesn’t realize she’s holding her breath, “what’re you in the mood for?”

“…hmm?” Tara asks, quickly pulling her eyes back to the line when Johnnie tries to catch her eye.

Johnnie laughs, “the menu. Anything catch your interest?”

“Well,” Tara starts as the autumn chill washes over the attendees on the farm, making her hunch her mesh covered shoulders a bit and clasp her hands together, “what would you recommend?”

“Everything.”

Tara scoffs as Johnnie winks at her.

“Can you even see the menu up ahead?”

“I’m not blind.”

“Nah, just short.” Johnnie teases while Tara quickly tosses a middle finger at the older girl.

Johnnie laughs to herself, picking up on tara’s attire which failed to keep her warm on this breezy farm. So Johnnie takes the opportunity to stand behind Tara instead, who is now bouncing on her tippy toes to what may seem like she was attempting to see the menu but it was probably to keep her blood flowing better.

Tara’s almost ready to swing until her belly realizes the familiar rasp by her ear, “you look cold, do you want a hug?”

Before her mouth can fumble out an answer, tatted hands come into Tara’s view as Johnnie locks her arms across Tara’s shoulders. She doesn’t find herself going stiff but easily welcomes Johnnie’s touch. A small smile graces Tara’s lips as her eyes fall in love with the dainty details of ink that decorate Johnnie’s skin. The artwork tells a story of Johnnie’s big heart which some may view as a contrast to her androgynous exterior much like the striking scar through Tara’s palm. That same scar Johnnie lightly draws a fingertip over from time to time and does so right now as Tara buries her nose against the side of Johnnie’s tatted other thumb.

Tara can even smell the balance of scents on Johnnie’s warm skin, a light creamy but earthy scent that makes Tara envision curling underneath blankets and staring out at Misty mountains instead of crowded streets full of loud voices, and suspicious faces. A sense of serenity that Tara wasn’t sure she’d ever find until she met Johnnie.

“What ya smiling at?”

Tara pries her eyes open, knowing she had been caught but keeps her eyes on the line that she didn’t realize moved forward some. “Nothing. You just think you’re so smooth when you could have been said you wanted to hold my hand earlier.”

Johnnie quickly places a peck to Tara’s temple so fast that she thinks she imagines it, “I want to do more than just hold your hand,” Johnnie ends up whispering before unraveling herself from Tara, who has to fight to hold herself up right.

“S’orry.” She mutters to those behind her as Johnnie takes the lead, heading right up to the stand, falling into small chatter with the worker before introducing an awkward Tara.

Tara is wide eyed as Johnnie banters back and forth for a little before they both set eyes on Tara.

“What?” Tara raises a brow, finding that she’s zoned out again just gazing at Johnnie socialize.

“You strike me as a apple nacho’s kinda girl.” The male worker says while Johnnie pretends to think about it.

“I’d say a apple cider donut but you’re of course welcome to try whichever or anything else on the board.” Johnnie responds, “on me.”

Tara tilts her head to the side, “what’re you getting?”

“The apple nachos,” Johnnie states.

Tara nods, “then I’ll get the donut…as long as you share.”

“Sure, sure. Anything you want,” Johnnie beams before turning back to the man, “you heard the lady!”

“Yeah, yeah.” He fans Johnnie with a knowing look before shouting out to the cooks off to the side.

With a carton tray full of crisp apple pastries—nachos, a side of caramel, two forks, and a yellow bag full of mini apple cider donuts, the two continued traveling through the large field together.

“Where have these been my entire life?” Tara groans after savoring the dessert.

Johnnie laughs, “right up here on this farm, I take it you’re enjoying those nachos?”

“Enjoying? More like I’d love to marry them! Can’t you tell by the way I’m murdering these bitches?! Perfect crunch on the outside and crisp from the apple on the inside, all with a side of caramel sauce?! It’s so delicious to the point i can’t even apologize for the noises you’re hearing because it’s your fault and I hope we finish them before the rest try to get any.” Tara admits through her rant while Johnnie abruptly stops.

Tara lifts her head, ready to question what was going on but Johnnie steered them in a different direction, “then we better head the other way since they’re all up by the goats and llamas.”

“Good call,” Tara says peeking over her shoulder to see Sam all cuddled up with Danny.

Disgustingly so.

Johnnie’s family farm was nice to be at although the temperature was constantly dropping but there weren’t many people out this evening, which was fine by Tara. The further they circled around the farm the closer they got to one of the rides here. It was the Ali baba—the large swing on the boot of a bulldozer? The pair stood beside each other outside the gate, watching as a few faces disappeared higher into the now gravel colored sky from side to side.

“you think someone died here?” Tara asks around the donut she previously stuffed her freckled face with.

Johnnie glances at tara and rotates to her better ear, “huh?”

The air from the ride and the earth along with the carnival music made it a bit difficult but after tara finishes the donut she speaks a bit louder, repeating the question, “you think someone died here?”

A couple shoot Tara a nasty look as they exit from behind the fence and Johnnie smirks at them with a mocking wave, leaning against the metal gate. Tara let’s out a snort as she leans towards Johnnie.

“Where’s that coming from?” Johnnie sweeps Tara’s bangs to the side.

Tara shrugs, “apparently horror films are not just a one month thing with Mindy. We’re now on your favorite series: final destination.”

Johnnie dips her head in understanding, “Ah,” and almost feels flattered that Tara remembered, “well this farms been open for about fifteen years and that ride’s only been around for the past five maybe? As far I know…no deaths. Why? You wanna get on?”

“Hell yeah I do,” Tara nods with a grin, “and I don’t care that I may puke everything up. As long as you promise to hold my hand.”

Johnnie taps her chin before matching Tara’s smile after lightly pressing their foreheads together, “I think I can do that, babe.”

‘Babe?!’ Tara thinks to herself as Johnnie takes their trash to the nearest barrel before meeting Tara half way with her hand held out.

And Tara doesn’t hesitate as she slips her smaller hand into Johnnie’s tatted one. She gives Tara’s hand a squeeze, fingers interlocked which Tara gazes down at while Johnnie watches Tara. When tara flicks her brown doe eyes back to meet Johnnie’s, they smile sweetly once more, feeling like this could be the start of—nope not something new! but a romance worth taking a stab-wait that’s not right either! chance on.

⁺˚⋆｡°✩₊✧˖°. ☼ ⁺˚⋆｡°✩₊✧˖°. ☼ ⁺˚⋆｡°✩₊✧˖°. ☼ ⁺˚⋆｡°✩ ⁺˚

[sokkigarden]

dancing with our hands tied (part ii)

jamie tartt x female reader // nsfw 18+ // enemies to lovers // fwb

masterlist // read on ao3

summary: the aftermath where some more impulse decisions are made

word count: 3.9k

once again shout out to bestie @whimsical-roasting for Understanding Jamie Tartt on a visceral level. i owe you everything !!! my muse fr and fav writing partner <333

༻✧✧✧༺

You barely paid attention to what happened during the match, but Laney squealed and gushed about some of the great plays, so you at least knew she had a good time. 

The entire match you found yourself staring off into space, your mind replaying the events of the last hour. His mouth hot along your neck. His hands holding you tight against him as he pounded into you. You would come back to yourself only to realize you were staring down at Jamie. He played really well; you could tell by his cocky attitude and high spirits whenever he cheered with his fellow teammates. 

You refused to unpack why you were thinking about him so much, or why he was playing particularly well today. It took every ounce of self restraint not to think about the moments preceding the match, but it was hard when you still felt the phantom grip of his fingers on your hips. The ache between your legs had yet to subside.

You walked back into the training facility with Laney, headed for the locker rooms since you promised your friend that she’d be able to meet everyone after the match.

You were not looking forward to inevitably running into Jamie.

Before the events of this afternoon, you had a dread when it came to interacting with him, knowing you had to be on the top of your comeback game. After the events of this afternoon, you wondered if you would ever be able to verbally spar with him again. Not after knowing how he feels. How he sounds when he’s coming undone.

You were irreversibly fucked.

Despite wanting to run in the opposite direction of the locker room, you walked in with your head held as high as you could muster. You saw Jamie right away, your eyes scanning quickly over his sweaty, fatigued form. Despite the muddy patches on his kit, he was glowing. A little part of you relished in the fact that he played so well after your impulsive hatesex. 

Getting the attention of the team, you introduced Laney to the boys. 

“She’s a big Richmond fan, so I wanted to give her a chance to say hello to you all,” you explained, nudging her to talk. 

She stumbled through a greeting with an air of partial shyness, but the boys were happy from their win, which broke the ice easily as she went around to chat with some of the players. You followed her around, taking a backseat to the conversation so she could enjoy her moment with the guys. Every bone in your body was telling you to look at Jamie.

But you refused to glance over in the direction of Jamie’s locker, even though you could feel his eyes burning a hole into the back of your head. 

When you finally chanced a look in his direction, he was staring directly at you, just as you suspected. You ended up tripping on air as you hastily looked away, clearly an aftershock from the events preceding the game. You hoped no one noticed your shaky legs causing you problems, but Sam spoke up jovially.

“Woah, jelly legs today, y/n?” he joked as he passed by. 

Your eyes involuntarily looked over at Jamie again, only to catch him smirking at the interaction. You clenched your teeth together, but told Sam that you were doing all right, just feeling clumsy.

After a couple more minutes, Laney bounded over to tell you she made plans to get drinks with some of the guys, and asked if you wanted to come along. While it all sounded fun and you always enjoyed going out for drinks with the players, you just wanted to head home and unpack everything that had happened today. When you told her you might just go home, she seemed sad but also not too sad to be going out with a bunch of fit footballers on her own. 

You headed back to the physio office to grab your stuff and finally took off the doomed Tartt jersey. As you packed your bag to go home, Zach, the new team nutritionist, walked in. 

You greeted him as you finished up, and he smiled over at you. 

“Hey, I saw you trip earlier, you okay?” he asked as he also collected his items to go home. “You headed out? Me too, let me walk you to your car.”

“Okay,” you smiled brightly at him.

Zach had only been working at the dog track since the beginning of the season, but he was friendly, fit, and it was always nice when there was a cute new guy to have a work crush on. You shared an office with a few of the other med staffers, so you often got lunch together and chatted with him frequently. Sometimes he flirted with you, and you were left wondering if he would ever ask you out.

You grabbed your bag and headed out of the office, with Zach closing the door behind you. You quietly chatted with him about the game as you walked through the facility.

As you turned the corner toward the exit, you almost ran right into Jamie, which had you once again tripping on air. Both Zach and Jamie reached out to catch you, but you righted yourself on your own. You couldn’t help your eyes going wide as you looked between the two of them, a nervous laugh escaping your lips.

Once you were standing tall again, your eyes met Jamie’s and it felt like he was trying to tell you a million things with his eyes. You couldn’t read any of it, but maybe you just didn’t want to. The intensity of his stare had you looking away to avoid dissecting your emotions in the middle of the Richmond FC hallways.

“So gravity’s not your friend today, huh?” Zach tried to lighten the mood.

You let out a flustered giggle as you shook your head, feeling shy about acting flirtatiously with Zach in front of a man you fucked not even a few hours ago. 

Jamie had a hardened gaze when you looked back at him. He rubbed at his chin, still standing in front of you and Zach. The awkwardness in the air was stifling. 

Suddenly, Jamie pulled a piece of paper out of his pocket, and held it out to you. You hesitated before accepting it with a questioning look, and opened it to see an address scrawled across in scratchy uppercase letters. You crumpled the piece of paper into your fist and glared at him.

He looked at you innocently, so you smiled sweetly at Zach before yanking Jamie aside.

“What the fuck is this?” you whispered.

“Thought you might want it,” he said with a cheeky grin. Like he knew everything in the world. 

You glared at him. “Nothing’s happening again, I already told you that.”

“Sure, okay. When you come to your senses,” he took the piece of paper out of your hands and flattened it back out before placing it in your hand again. “You know where to find me.” 

Before you could say anything else, he left without so much as goodbye. You let out a humorless laugh at his behavior.

Zach walked over to you, suddenly reminding you that you weren’t alone. 

“What was that about?” he asked you.

“Don’t worry about it,” you replied. “Just Jamie being Jamie.” 

It was vague because you didn’t really know what to say, but Zach nodded like he understood. It was a bit quieter as you finished the walk to the car park, but it was early enough in the night that you sorta hoped Zach might ask you out for a bite to eat. 

Ask me out! you want to yell at him. Ask me out so I don’t go home and freak out about the fact that I had sex with the price prick of all pricks.

You felt guilty for even thinking of using him as a distraction, but sex with Jamie was also just a distraction from the truth. School and then work had taken up so much of your time; you hadn’t been in an actual relationship in years, just bouncing from one hook-up to the next. You were tired of it. You wanted to find your person. To have someone be there. To finally stop going on stupid dating apps and getting set up on blind dates. Zach was nice. Why couldn’t he just ask you out?

He didn’t. Clearly the interaction with Jamie ruined whatever vibe you had going on earlier, and Zach bid you goodbye, telling you he’d see you at work tomorrow. 

You got into your car feeling a bit bummed out. While you hadn’t been getting major signals from Zach, you still flirted a decent amount with each other and were hoping that maybe he’d finally ask you out. Were you not putting off the right vibes? 

You were halfway home, flipping through radio stations when you caught a glance at the piece of paper Jamie had given you. You pursed your lips, tapping your fingers against the steering wheel while you contemplated.

Inside, you fought a war with yourself. On one hand, it had been a while since you’d had sex, and now a fit footballer was offering himself up on a silver platter. On the other hand, Jamie would be so fucking smug if you showed up, and he was a fit footballer whose actions were unpredictable. Could your pride, and your emotions, take the hit?

You found your answer as you plugged the address into your navigation app and headed over to his place. You refused to think about the consequences, refused to have any thoughts in your head. 

The nerves didn’t hit you until you were standing on Jamie’s front steps, ringing the doorbell. Were you insane? The door opened not even a minute later.

“Look who decided to show up.” 

Despite his cocky words, his face told you he was in fact surprised that you decided to come over. His eyes are shiny in the night time light as they peered into your own.

You took a step through his doorway, ignoring your shaky hands. 

“I don’t wanna hear it,” you said, grabbing his face with both hands and bringing his lips to yours. 

He let out a near whimper when your lips touched. You hated how he made you feel like everything was falling into place. You heard the door shut behind you as he grabbed onto your waist, drawing you closer to him. 

It only took a few seconds before you both were panting and breathless against each other. You gripped his shirt, trying to bring him impossibly closer, while his hands roamed your torso, sliding beneath your shirt. 

You were the first to slide your tongue into the other’s mouth, earning a surprised little ‘mhmp!’ from Jamie. But he was quick to recover, sucking on yours as his fingers rubbed circles against your sides where your shirt had ridden up. 

It’s like your hands had a mind of their own, traveling up over his shirt to his sculpted shoulders and down his arms to squeeze his bicep. You reveled in the way he flexed under you, so reactive to your touch. Further pressing yourself against him, you brought your arms to settle around his neck, nails lightly scratching his nape.

Jamie groaned as you slid your hands through his hair, tugging at the strands. He slowly started moving backward toward the staircase, but you hardly noticed while his lips traced a hot path down your jawline and neck. Your skin was alight with the fire everywhere he touched. 

Once you got to the stairs, in the hastiness of each other, you almost tripped again. You were starting to get tired of this sudden clumsiness, even more so when you heard him chuckle. He didn’t even try to hide how amused he was. God, the asshole sounded so smug but you didn’t miss the hoarseness in his voice. You weren’t the only one so affected. 

He spun you around and sat you on the stairs, unzipping your jeans with one hand while supporting himself with the other. 

You weren’t sure what he was doing, but once he had better access to your underwear, you wondered if he was going to just fuck you on his stairs. You found the urgency of his actions turned you on immensely. 

He met your lips with his own as his fingers pressed against your clit over the fabric. He swallowed up the moan you let out at the contact. The feeling of his two fingers rubbing circles over the evergrowing wet patch on your underwear felt sensational. You felt even more aroused as you thought of the mental image of yourself, helpless under him as he rubbed and kissed you. Your obvious growing arousal gave away how eager you were for his touch, and you realized didn’t mind if he knew it. 

But the hard stairs beneath you were digging into your back, stealing your focus from him all over you.

You broke the kiss for a moment, opening your eyes to see Jamie gazing intently at you. Your breaths came out in heavy pants as you stared back. You pressed a hand to his cheek, endearingly.

“I love the enthusiasm,” you said, gesturing to his hand in your pants, “But this is kinda uncomfy. Happen to have a bed somewhere?”

Jamie blinked at you for a moment before seeming to shake himself out of his reverie and withdrawing his hand. He nodded, standing up and pulling you up with him. 

Suddenly you were swooped into his arms, as he climbed the stairs. You couldn’t help the laugh you let out at the romantic gesture. 

You let out another laugh upon entering his room. You hadn’t really noticed much of the decor downstairs, instead being solely focused on kissing the daylights out of Jamie Tartt. But now that you glanced around his bedroom, you noticed little pieces of him. 

A big full length mirror next to the closet. Some trophies on his dresser. A large painting that looked abstract but you knew if you asked him about it, he would wax poetic about the artistry. 

His bed was covered in slate gray sheets, a dozen plush pillows and a dark duvet. And the thing that stood out most? The leopard print headboard. 

Jamie noticed you observing his room, bringing your eyes back to him. 

“Good’n proper, innit?” he asked, looking proud of his interior design.

You let out an incredulous giggle, before he pulled you over to the bed, and pressed you into the sheets. 

Your clothes were off in record time and Jamie Tartt was suddenly between your legs. He peppered kisses to the inside of your thighs, taking his time to savor every inch of skin. 

Finally his tongue met your folds, and you nearly melted into a puddle on the mattress. You tugged at his hair as he lapped at your clit. He kept a slow pace and you ran your hands gingerly through his hair.

Slowly, he inserted a finger, then two, making you moan at the sensation. His mouth never let up, and he draped one arm over your torso to keep you from rising off the mattress. His breath was hot against you as he sucked and licked at your core. You were so wet. 

“Are you trying to ruin all other men for me?” you muttered between breaths. 

His chuckle sent vibrations through you, and you whined in response. He knew exactly what he was doing and it showed. 

He hooked his fingers inside you to find just the right spot and it wasn’t even a few more moments before you came with a loud whine. 

You just laid there for a moment, catching your breath and learning to function again without his mouth all over you. You looked over to see him slowly taking off his jeans and shirt, his eyes never leaving yours.

You couldn’t help but stare back, watching his movements meticulously. He chuckled at you in that cocky way of his and you realized how heavily you were thirsting over him. You were shamelessly eye-fucking him. 

You went to look away before he took his dick out, turning over onto your stomach as a distraction. You weren’t sure you’d ever recover from this if you saw Jamie in all his naked glory.

You felt the bed shift as he joined you, his weight settling over top of your body. He brushed your hair across your shoulder before peppering kisses across your neck. His hair tickled your face.

His hands roamed all over, tracing a trail of heat from your shoulders, down your spine, to your ass which he squeezed tenderly before smacking it.

You didn’t even try to muffle the moan that left your mouth. 

Jamie chuckled. “Don’t reckon I’ll get tired of that anytime soon.”

“Just fuck me, please,” you whined in response, pushing your ass up against him. 

That was all it took for him to finally slide inside you, causing you both to groan simultaneously. He kept himself propped up above you as he thrusted into you. You clenched your hands into the sheets.

Everything was overwhelming. How was it possible that sex with Jamie felt even better the second time?

Was it the fact that you both had more privacy? The freedom to make as much noise without the fear of someone walking in? Or was it the fact that his body felt hot and perfect against you? Like you’d been walking around searching for a missing puzzle piece, and he fit impeccably. 

You were surrounded by Jamie. You could hear his staggered breaths against your ear as you clenched around him. His arms propped around your head so that when your breathy moans left your lips, they flowed across his wrists before disappearing into the air around you.

“Jamie,” you panted, “I need more.”

He paused for a moment, midthrust, and you wondered if you’d said the wrong thing. Suddenly, he pulled out completely and flipped you over, so you were looking directly into his eyes. It took everything in you not to let your eyes drift down to the rest of his body. Out of the corner of your eye, you could see he was just as sculpted as you expected. Hard muscles mized with soft skin. You wondered once again how the hell you wound up fucking him not once, but twice.

His eyes were unreadable, and the only sound was your breaths mixing in the space between you. Slowly, he leaned down to press a kiss to your cheek, your jaw, your earlobe. The warm softness of his lips made you squirm underneath him. He took his time, which was oddly affectionate. The words that came out of his mouth next were decidedly less so.

“Yeah?” he whispered into your ear. “Need me to fuck you harder?”

White heat ran through your veins. You nodded frantically, biting your lip to hold back a moan. 

He slid his dick back into you, holding eye contact as he did so. 

“I want you to see who’s fucking you good.”

He picked back up in speed, and you were close, so close. Your whines filled the room with desperation. That’s what it was. Desperation. You were desperate. Desperate to stay like this, to feel him deep and to have him so fixated on you. But you were also desperate to find a release. The pit building in your stomach was making your mind hazy. The sounds coming from your mouth were more broken as you fought to keep your eyes from rolling back. But the way Jamie groaned, cooing dirty little phrases at you, you knew this was a losing battle.

 “That’s it, take it all- fuck,” he groaned not slowing down in the slightest. 

You closed your eyes as you got close to your climax. Your hands held onto his hips as he pushed your knees up closer to your chest to get that much deeper. 

“Open your eyes, love,” he said.

You did as he said, not realizing the intensity of the request until you were coming undone while staring into his blue eyes. Your brows furrowed and your mouth fell open, a silent moan caught in your throat as he took you in. You were speechless as you both came down from your high and he finally slid out and your legs relaxed. He ended up laying half on top of you, but you were too spent to say anything.

The weight of him was heavy but comforting. Once the high of your orgasm subsided, you once again started overthinking everything. You couldn’t stop your head from spinning with too many thoughts.

I’m in such deep shit, you thought. 

Jamie rolled off of you and rummaged around in the bedside table. He rolled back over to you with some tissues, wiping off your legs with a careful touch. 

The action was incredibly intimate and you hadn’t expected him to help you clean up. The next words out of his mouth were even more unexpected. 

“Do you want to stay?” 

You caught a glance at the clock on his dresser, telling you it wasn’t even midnight. 

You didn’t want to unpack why his offer touches you so deeply. But as much as you want to stay, you know you really shouldn’t. You’ve read too much into things in the past and you didn’t want to repeat the same mistakes. Especially with someone you saw at work on a near daily basis. It was time to get back to reality. 

So you said, “No, that’s okay, I’m gonna head home,” even though it made your heart ache in a weird way. 

He didn’t say anything for a moment. Then he nodded, and sent a crooked smile your way. 

“You sure you can even walk?” he asked. 

Your legs did feel like jelly but you refused to show weakness. You got up and shimmied into your jeans, pulling your top on after. 

You looked back at him, to see he was lounged across his bed butt-naked. You finally let your eyes linger on him the way you wanted, and he definitely noticed. You looked away. 

“I’m just fine, thanks.” You replied stiffly. 

He rolled his eyes, telling you he’d at least walk you down. You expected him to get dressed but he just put on his shirt and followed you back downstairs. 

“Well if you ever get lonely, my door is always open,” he said. 

Despite having fucked him twice in less than 12 hours, you let your cold exterior slide back into place, narrowing your eyes at him. 

“In your dreams, Tartt.”

You exited through the door and walked down his front path, refusing to turn around as he sang out a good night. But you couldn’t stop the ghost of a smile from gracing your face.

Leaving was harder than it should be.

[madsipie]

ever since I read Matt's wiki page I am all for the idea of him being the group's "mom". aka stuff like,

Matt reminding Josh to take his meds (if they're in a space together and it's obvious he hasn't OR he's just woken up)

Matt being the main peacekeeper in arguments (though he kinda sucks at that...)

Matt helping Jess and/or Emily with fashion advice (aka: they force him to watch them model clothes and he gives them Gordon Ramsey type advice and they nod like they're thinking deeply about his words before trying on a new outfit)

Matt being a wingman for Chris (aka: since he and Ash are kinda close and I hc them as study-buddies, have Chris randomly show up then Matt is like "baww shit, gotta brb to the bathroom, don't have too much fun without me!!!" and now Ash and Chris are forced to interact, which they're both fine with they're just rlly awkward)

Matt helping Mike practice his speeches when he goes to college and/or when he was still in HS preparing for his class president shit (Mike is like "ok how about this: I think that this school should have an annual bikini day--" and Matt is like "Mike, what the fuck, no???")

Matt patching up Sam if she trips while she's hiking (even if it's a small scrape, Matt has a spidey-sense for this kinda shit, and he goes hiking with Sam occasionally because I HATE that they didn't interact in game and I said so)

Matt helping Hannah study for tests (spoiler alert: they're both fucking stupid so Ash ends up coming over too)

Matt being the "supervisor" for girl's nights because he's typically invited for some odd reason (Jess loves him, Emily likes watching him freak out over girly stuff, Beth doesn't go because she doesn't want to, Ash and Sam are having a good time and honestly everyone knows that Matt is a safe guy. also Hannah likes painting his nails, but Josh usually crashes it anyways because he wants his nails painted so get the fuck out of his way)

and finally, Beth being the "dad" of the group and both her and Matt ranting to each other about how weird their friends are

[restlesschilled]

Tmag 6 thoughts

Note: Im a backer so this was done on Tuesday the 13th and set to post on Thursday the 15

Credits

omg thats the sweetest thing im gonna cry

Pre "statemen

[insert caffine patch gag from meet the robbinsons]

as some one who worked overnights YES SAM GET THE BLACK OUT CURTAINS

"the sun is the enemy" Alice dark avatar confirmed? /hj

new guy??

turn over rate is also high in general for overnight jobs because its hell

also i know this is overnight in the script because spooky and also jonny and alex worked a job like this and thats hoe they met but WHY IN GODS NAME WOULD A JOB LIKE THIS BE OVERNIGHT?(fear and paranoia obviously)

WHY WAS ALEX AND JONNY'S REAL LIFE JOB OVERNIGHT?

can someone get Sam some vitamin D as well hes got melanin hes gonna absorb it slower

sleepy man

"Statement"

MICHAEL CODED

VERY MICHAEL CODED

NEW SPIRAL AVATAR?

SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP

(fun fact that's Giaus Octavius from Cry Havic!)

also looked at the cast (dont do it till you finish and HOLY FUCKING SHIT)

his name iss needles guys

Freaking out

porcupine man

pinhead

post statement

lol he was enjoying it

headcanon sam loves r/nosleep

also we've been called out

THIS IS WHY I WAS FREAKING OUT AT THE CAST LIST

HI CELIA

HI LOWRI

HERE SHE IS EVERYONE MY BIGGEST FUCKING QUESTION

also her last name is after Alex and Hannahs Dog which i love

"JUST ENSURE YOU EAT THEM ONSITE" LOL

CELIA WHAT A MOOD

LOWRI MY BELOVED

super weird interview

"and im both, the system work!"

love celia cant trust her but love her

"four weirdos in a basement reading scary stories" AFHGHLGSDALGELKRG

"AND I THOUGHT I HID IT BEHIND THE BUBBLY DEMEANOR" OMFG

HI IF YOU DONT REMBER CELIA FROM TMA GO BACK AND LISTEN TO MAG100 AND THEN MAG190 AND MAG194

freaking out

freaking the fuck out

GWEN REALLY JUST SAID DONT GET ATTACHED

shes already been to the break room?

hes got a crush on her

ALICE WHAT

“Would you like tea Celia? Coffee perchance? My heart carved from my chest and arranged on a little doily? Please, Celia, cut out my tongue so I can always be there to lick your stamps for you!”

"IF YOU KNEW ANYTHING ABOUT STAMPS" SAM YOU ABSOLUTE DWEEB.

the date on the statement is 3 days before the date it was accessed by Sam

CAT1RB4824-09022024-12022024

omfg

[jbucb]

Chapter one: Cygnus

A/n: I hope you enjoy this, and please let me know how you felt about this chapter.

(Small update this was slightly revised without a writing aid.)

Chapter warning: self-deprecation, talks of virginity, some angst. Mentions of divorce, marriage, and military

Series masterlist // Main masterlist

 

I just couldn't believe it... My best friend just got married, and here I was sitting in this fold-out chair around the fire pit at a get-together, holding a glass of Moscato d'Asti. I should be happy for Samantha and Eli. I'd known them my whole life, and of course, I loved the updates that she sent her dad and others. But here I am, just a post-grad living with my parents while Samantha and Eli are in Italy on their honeymoon.

I watch the flames flicker and crackle. Chuck, the German shepherd, knudges my foot. That is all it takes to get me out of my thoughts. Chuck holds a ball in his mouth, his tail wagging slightly as he tilts his head. Chuck's eyes are the epitome of expressiveness, as if he holds all his feelings in the hues of his puppy dog's eyes, just like his owner's eyes.

I look up and around to see what the others are doing.

Sam, Bucky, and my father Steve are talking. My mother and Sam's wife share a conversation separately.

 

I decided to place my wine down and sneak off out of the fenced yard, with Chuck the shepherd following me up into a large field up behind the limewashed house. The hills roll for miles, some tree lines scattered across the valley, patches off it darkened by the banks of creeks, but it wasn't the view that took my breath away as I threw the ball for Chuck.

It was the stars; they were beautiful. The only light that wasn't from the moon came from the house at the bottom of the hill. Eventually, I sat down in the grass, and Chuck lay beside me.

I was so lost in thought that I didn't hear the footsteps coming up behind me, and only out of my peripheral view did I see him sit down beside me, but I still didn't look at him. I kept my eyes on the stars.

"That star right there is Vega." He starts his voice, gruff but not harsh; he sounds calm. "Below it is Deneb, it uh makes. " There's a slight pause—no more than a nanosecond—but I picked it up. "Cygn-the Swan," he cuts off the original name he was going to say. I move my head in his direction, but my eyes linger on Cygnus for a moment before my eyes meet his.

As I look at him, all I can think about is how beautiful he is. I shouldn't be thinking of him this way. He's my dad's best friend. I've known him for the better part of my life.

But how does the moonlight refract off his blue orbs so beautifully? The way it highlights the pale skin while keeping his faint freckles that faintly dust the bridge of his nose, fading into the apple of his cheeks, is so prominent, unlike how the sun fades out the star-like marks. But soon, my thoughts yet again fade into how I'm falling behind all of my friends. Everyone I've ever known is falling in love, and I'm falling behind—behind on a relationship, behind on my life, behind on losing my virginity. God, I would have been behind on my first kiss if it wasn't for that game of spin the bottle in my senior year of high school.

The bad part is that he can read me like a book, whether I like it or not. "What's on your mind, kiddo?"

God, why does his voice have to be that caring and his eyes that gentle? "You've been quiet all night. That's not like you, sneaking off, especially before finding a way to tell Sam and I your newest joke." Again, in a way, I find myself asking why Bucky Barnes has to be so perceptive.

"It's nothing, Buck," I say, but I just could tell that my tone wasn't cutting it.

"No, it's not." He doesn't sugarcoat his words. "Somethings bothering you, Dol-Kiddo; you can talk to me. You can always talk to me." He cuts himself off again. I knew what he was going to call me, and I couldn't help but wish he'd call me Doll and not just Kiddo.

We sit in static silence for a while before I say anything.

"I just feel as if I'm falling behind." I'm messing with my fingers as I speak.

"You're taking it all in," he pauses. "I wish I had taken it all in.".

I take in his words before responding, "You do?" I know about his marriage to Dotty, the military, and then some of the divorce. "Yeah, looking back, I wish I would've," he replied to my question before I could even take in what I asked. "I think if I took my time with all the big things, I would've been way happier than I was. That's in the past. I rushed and regretted it, but there's nothing that I can do about it now."

When I glance over to him, he is looking up at the stars and resting back on his elbows. He starts to speak again as I face him. "I don't know what's on your mind, and I sure as hell can't tell you that I do, but whatever it is, take your time."

"If I take my time, I'm sure I'll die a virgin."

I wish I could've stopped the stupid words that spilled out of my mouth, but it happened so quickly that I didn't even register what I had said until I saw the expression on his face.

"I'm so sorry." Oh, um," "I didn't mean it." "No, it's ok." We went back and forth for a few brief moments.

 

"We should probably head back before they notice we're gone." I start to say, It's almost like I didn't hear what I'd said, but as I start to stand,

"I could fix that." That stopped me dead in my tracks. "Y/n.. shit," he breathes in. "I didn't mean to say that," he says, starting to ramble as he stands. "God, Y/N, I'm so sorry; I didn't mean to."

"You really mean that." I didn't even hear him start to ramble. All I could hear was I could fix that, repeating in my head—my thoughts.

"Yes, Y/N, yes, I really apologize for saying that." He touched my arm briefly, and that snapped me out of my thoughts.

I look up at him, confused as to why he is apologizing. I arch an eyebrow. "So you're saying you'd take my virginity? I'd let you." I crane my neck back but then briefly look at the group's near the firepit, making sure nobody has glanced over.

It seems Bucky has the same idea, but he looks back at me, his eyes blown wide and his eyebrows raised. "What?" He sounds skeptical, but also like he's playing off the fact that he didn't hear what I said.

I match his tone and parrot his "What?" We stared at each other for a few moments.

"Y/n, if you're just pulling my leg, tell me, but don't joke about that shit," Bucky breathes out.

"I'm not joking." My tone is much quieter. "Before you say anything," I pointedly say, "I'm not a kid anymore. Buck, I can't stand being treated like one" or called one, but I'd never say that to his face, "especially because I'm not experienced." I use the palm of my hand to rub my eye.

"Believe me, sweetheart, I know, I know," he says, his tone gentle as his eyes try to catch mine as he speaks. "We can talk about this later. It's getting late, and I'm sure your folks want to go home."

"You promise we'll talk?" My tone clearly holding disbelief.

"I promise." 

[hazel-eye-coffee-shop-girl-blog]

Just Breathe- Series

Good evening everyone! here is the second chapter in the Just Breathe Series. This series was inspired/prompted by the ask that was submitted by @deans-spinster-witch to read the first chapter click here for the original post. @deans-spinster-witch was gracious enough to lend her skills in ruffing out a few of the mishaps in chapter one, and I will post that updated version at some point and link it, and did the same for this second chapter. 

Here is the original ask for a refresher.

Ask from @deans-spinster-witch:

Tell me about Dean falling in love with a girl who has long covid - maybe they met when he saved her from a monster and they became friends, she occasionally helps him with research or patches him up if he gets hurt.  He doesn’t hear from her for a while, and when he goes to check on her, he finds out she’s in the hospital with Covid - a monster he can’t save her from.  He realizes he loves her, but may lose her.  After she gets out he keeps coming to check on her because he knows she tires easily/has trouble breathing at times.

This second chapter is going to start with a bit of time jump, but don’t worry we got flashback a plenty to fill in the gaps. Multi POV between the main character, Y/N, and Dean Winchester, mentions of Sam Winchester. This is angst, sweet/fluffy, swearing, implied sexy times. Oh and word count is at 7,250-ish, sorry but not sorry. 

Sadly the Winchesters are not mine, but the story is so please don’t steal and post as your own. But likes, reblog, and comments are always welcome. As always any mistakes like grammar, spelling, function is also all mine, so be kind when pointing it out, I do my best. 

I would like to know if you like this chapter would you want to see a third chapter? or maybe a prequel to answer any questions you might have regarding Y/N and Dean? Let me know. 

Thank you again for reading, and you would like to send me a prompted or story idea, send it my way. 

Happy Reading

Time Jump to 4 months ahead. 

Y/N POV

Shit, Shit, Shit! Where the hell are my keys! You yell out in frustration as you move frantically around your house, looking for the one thing that you need to get to your appointment on time. Tossing the pillows from the couch, goddamn it! You were never like this, ever since COVID, your short term memory has been foggy to put it nicely. Resorting to keeping both a paper list and digital one on your phone, is your new normal. Walking into a room to do something, and instantly forgetting what you came for. Case in point, not remembering where you put your goddamn keys! 

You hate running late, you pride yourself on always being early to things, and this appointment was an important one. Walking into the kitchen, you start to look in the not so obvious places. Opening up the fridge, nope not in there. Pull open the freezer next, yep there they are, right next to the pint of mint chip ice cream that you just had to have yesterday at like 11 pm. Only to then be disappointed that you now can’t stand the taste of your once favorite ice cream, fuck you COVID! 

Ugh, seriously, you are going to be the death of me, you think. Grabbing your keys, you push the freezer door closed, and head off to the hospital for your fourth month CT scan. Locking the door behind you, the crisp air of fall hits you. God how you don’t want winter to come any sooner then it has too. Winters in Michigan can be brutal, especially on the coast line. Pulling your light jacket close to you, you quicken your pace and get into your jeep to start up the car quickly, and pull out of the driveway. Not noticing the very familiar black impala parked about three houses down. 

****

You make it with time to spare, as you wait in the waiting room after checking in, you try your best to calm yourself. Fiddling with your phone, you find that scrolling through Instagram is getting you nowhere and your emails have been radio silent for months now. Exhausted, you put your phone away, you look around the room. For mid morning it's not too busy, the daytime talkshow mixes in with the white noise of the hospital. It's so beige, beige carpet, walls, even the uncomfortable furniture is beige. It makes sense, given it's a hospital; money should be spent on actual patient care, not on the latest interior furnishings., But still, at least get some interesting artwork. Looking to the piece across from you: an abstract painting of paint strokes in grays, blues, and you guessed  it, beige.

“Ms. Moore?” The nurse's voice pulls you from your thoughts, and you look up to see her standing at the entryway in blue scrubs, dark brown hair pulled back, with a kind smile. 

“Yep” you reply to her, but you're sure she would have guessed that was you, as your head snapped at attention when your name was called. “Hi”, giving her a smile as you walk towards her.

“Hi,” she replies, “can you tell me your last name and date of birth?” She starts walking down the hallway, looking at your chart, the path was second nature for her. You rattle off your last name and birthday for her, then she stops just off from an open doorway, “right in here.” Letting you walk in first.

She takes a seat at a desk, swiping her badge to start keying in some information. “So, here for your four month CT scan.” she states, but it also feels like a question.

“Umm, yeah, it's my second one.” You reply, still getting used to coming to the doctor more than twice a year. You only ever went if you were feeling really sick. 

“Looks like the first one was clean, but we like to do a few in close succession when someone has had a severe case of covid.” she explains, her eyes are kind, and reassuring, “I am sure this one will be just as good, and then hopefully the doctor will schedule them farther apart.”

She must see the worry on your face. Not sure how to respond, you just nod your head. She takes your vitals, asks if anything else has changed since your last visit, and if there were any other concerns you wanted to discuss today. “No, I don’t think so.” 

Typing a few more things in the computer, and then swapping her badge again to lock the computer. “I am surprised your brother is not here with you today.” 

“What?” You're taken aback by this, brother, does she mean Dean? How would she know about him? Was it in your chart? You don’t remember adding him as your emergency contact.

She can tell you are put off by this. “Sorry, I should have re-introduced myself. I was your nurse when you were in here with covid.”

“Oh, yeah, sorry, I should have…”

“No, it's fine. Honestly, I wouldn’t expect you to remember me.”

Thinking back to that time, she does seem familiar now, “well it's nice to see you again…” struggling to remember her name quickly, but not inconspicuously looking at her badge, “Bridget.” This gets a laugh out of her, and you do the same. “I was happy to see your name on the schedule today, and I thought you were the one with the very cute, and very attentive brother. That's why I am surprised he is not here.”

Ah yes, Dean, not being here. That is a long, long story that you're sure she does not want, nor has the time to hear right now. You give her a forceful smile, “Yeah, Dean, he has something today, so just me.”

Her smart watch goes off, and she looks at the time, “well we should get you down to CT. After your scan, we will come back here and the doctor will be with you to go over the results.” She gets up, and you follow. 

****

The wait feels like forever, and in the small exam room with nothing to look at but an exam table -and beige walls - you were lost in your head. Worrying about what if they found something, what if you developed lesions, or anything that could compromise your health. God, how you wish Dean was here, or even Sam. Someone to hold your hand and distract you from the impending doom and dark thoughts that were creeping in. Dean would distract you with lame jokes, or stories about how Sammy was terrified of doctors. He would get you to smile anyway he could, probably go so far and raid the supplies of tongue depressors and cotton balls, saying something like “they don’t need all of them, do they?”

“Ms. Moore, how are we today?” The doctor's voice breaks up your fleeting thoughts of Dean, as if he was right there, but as soon as the man in the white coat opens the door and steps through, Dean disappears. 

“Umm, good, at least I hope so.” You reply, wanting to keep the pleasantries short, let get to the point so you can get out of here. 

He takes a look over the file, and then pulls up the scans on the computer. He seems to be taking forever, did he not look at them beforehand! Come on man just tell me already! “Everything looks good, I am not seeing any growth of lesions or scar tissue from the tube.”

Relife floods your body, letting out a sight, “oh that great news, so I am done with coming in?” you hope so, wanting to never see this place again, at least for a while. 

He turns to face you, his dark brown eyes are kind, but you can tell right away he is not going to give you the answer you want. “Not yet, but we can push them to every six months.”

Okay, twice a year, I guess that is a compromise you can take, “okay, so I will see you in the spring.” Starting to get up to leave, but he stops you.

“In two months, we can start doing six month visits. I want to see you again one more time in two months. If that scan is clean then we push them to six month visits.” He explains. 

You sit back down in defeat, you're going to be back here in two months, really! You know you can’t take your frustration out on him, he is just looking out for your health and doesn’t want to miss anything. “Okay.” Slightly defeated, wanting nothing more than to curl up on the couch, and sleep for the next two months away. 

Giving your hands a reassuring pat, “two months will fly by I promise. Is there anything else you want to discuss today? Still having some memory issues?”

You know that you should be honest with him, that you think you have gotten worse since Dean left, but honestly are you sure? He did so much for you in that short time, maybe, you were like this before, and he just didn’t point it out. Plus you just wanted to go home, what really could he do anyways? “Nothing new on that. I think I just need to get back to my normal routine and I will be fine.” 

Getting up from his chair, “Sounds good. I will send Bridget back in, she will get you set up for your next appointment. We will see you in two months. Have a good day.” shutting the door behind him. You're back alone in that quiet room.

Alone, you're alone, once again. You can feel the panic start to creep in. Alone, and even though the scan was good, he still wants you to come back. Alone, no one to hold your hand, no one to make stupid jokes. You did this to yourself, you know that, he would have stayed, you pushed him…

“Alright, Doctor says two months humm.” Bridget's voice breaks through. It's light and airy. Trying to make the situation as pleasant as possible. As soon as she sits down, she can tell you're not alright, “Hey, what's wrong?” She asks, setting down the chart, and focusing on you.

Feeling a tear run down your cheek, fuck why are you crying.  “Umm…it's nothing….yeah two months…” You take a ragged breath, pushing all your emotions down, down, down, to the deepest part of your soul where they should always live. You can cry when you get home. Suck it up for two more minutes!

“Hey, talk to me, what’s going on.” She is not letting you wash this away, she grabs the tissue box, and holds it out for you to pull a couple out of the box. “Your scan was clean, the doctor is just being cautious that's all.” 

“I know it's just…I really wish he was here….”

“Dean,” she replies, filling in the blanks. You nod at this, and wipe your eyes and face. “I am sure if you talk to him, he will come to the next appointment.”

Oh if she only knew, but you couldn’t lay this all out on a complete stranger. Again she just wants to do her job, and move on to the next patient, you're taking up too much of her time. “I am sure you're right.” Taking a few ragged breaths. 

She gives you a reassuring smile, and turns to the computer to book your appointment, reminding you that you can always change it to accommodate if Dean can’t make it this time. “I could tell he really cares for you. Even in the short time I saw him, he wouldn’t leave your side for anything. Practically had to kick him out every night when visiting hours were over.” Trying to make the situation light, and hopefully get a smile back on your face. 

Giving her a short laugh, “yeah that sounds like Dean.” You can see it, him waiting until the last possible second. A security guard to escort him out.

Both of you get up, and she walks you to the door, and down the hall towards the exit. Seeing you coming back around, she decides to let you in on a little secret. Stopping you before opening up the door to the waiting room she leans in slightly. “Just between you and me, I knew he wasn’t your brother.”

“What….I mean…no he is….” You stammer out, hoping that she wasn’t going to bust you for…something, you're not sure? But still not wanting to get into trouble.

“Don’t worry dear, it's fine.” She quickly replies, trying to calm your fears. 

You let out a sigh of relief, “How did you know?”

“Two things. One he just pulled on my heartstrings so much that I figured what would be the harm in him sticking around, even if he wasn’t related. Plus, if I was ever lucky enough to have a guy look at me the way he did to you, I would want him to be by my side every second.”

Her smile is contagious, and although you're still doubting that what you feel for Dean would ever be reciprocated, now is not the time to hash it out with her. “What was the second?”

“I may have heard him one night on the phone with someone, saying he couldn’t lose you, that he needed to tell you that he was in love with you.'' She says matter of factly, pushing the door open and waiting for you to walk through. 

*******

Dean POV

He watches as she pulls into the driveway and shuts off the car. He had followed her from a safe distance from the hospital to the store, and then back to her house. She didn’t notice once, even though he had taught her in the past how to spot a tail. Did she get bad news? Maybe it's the COVID that is affecting her hunter instincts? Fuck, if thats the case, what else could she be missing? Is it stupid and desperate of him to be following her, and watching from a distance? Maybe, but also not, if she is not noticing simple things like him following her. What if  Lucifer, or one of his henchmen, came after her? Anxiety just thinking of irrational attacks on you causes his chest to tighten as he pulls back into the parking spot a few houses down.

He should be a man and go up to you, talk to you, and see you face to face. He missed you, your smile, your laugh - fuck, everything about you. He knows he screwed up. As soon as he did what he did, he wished he could have taken it back, but the damage was done. He kept saying it was for the best, that you would forgive him, and move on. But you can’t forgive him unless he stops being a little stalker and owns up to what he did.

Flashback to the night of the big blowup. Dean POV

Standing there, staring down the closed door, you wish right now you had superpowers to see through the door and see if she’s alright. Hell, you don’t need to be a superhero to know she’s not. You're just wondering what brought this on. “Y/N, come on, talk to me” you plead, softly knocking on the door. “I am sorry…I don’t mean to…” your rambling stops when you hear soft sobs from the otherside of the door. 

“Just go away Dean!” She yells between sobs. “I can’t breathe with you here… I can’t…”

You grab the door knob, fear and pressure weighing down on you to get to her, to hold her.  Most importantly, to make her understand that your overbearing protectiveness is coming from a place of needing to be in control, that you care for her, and need to protect her “Y/N, please just open the door, let's talk? I promise I will ease up, I can do better.”

You can hear her give a small laugh at that, you're about to question her on this when your phone goes off. Screw it, let it go to voicemail, she is more important than anything else. “I am not giving up on you, on us. You have to come out eventually.” 

Your phone stops ringing for a second and then starts back up again. What the Hell? “You should answer that, Dean.” She states without hesitation, but  with an undertone of sadness. 

Letting out a sigh, you turn around. “Fine if you want to talk via phone, fine.” Walking away from her door into the living room, you pick up your phone from the coffee table. To your surprise it's not her name across the screen, but Sam’s. “What?” you bark out in frustration, not really wanting to talk with him right now. 

“Dean, back off.” Sam says matter of factly. No pleasantries, just straight to the point. 

“She called you? Why?” Confused as to why she is including Sam on this.

“She just needs some space, Dean, I think it's time you come back. Jody called and…” Sam calmly says, trying his best to diffuse the situation from the other side of the country. 

“No, Sam, I am not leaving her! I can’t lose her again, I won’t… I love her, man…”

Your back is to the hallway, so you don’t notice Y/N standing there, listening, hearing  what you should be confessing to her and not your brother. You don’t see her wondering why can’t you just say what you feel? Why can’t you just let down your guard with her and tell her?

*****

The slamming of a trunk pulls Dean back to the present, and he looks up to see you carrying an arm load of groceries. Of course you would do it in one trip. He shakes his head, remembering that you never like to take more than one trip from the car to the house. Your logic always being, as you told him, I am a single girl, I can do it in one go. He watched as you held the screen door open with your butt, as you switched all the bags to one arm so you could open the door with the other. Looking away once you're inside, Dean notices it’s about 20 minutes since you pulled in the driveway. Had you been sitting there this whole time? You have only gone to the hospital and store, but still your energy must not be back to what it used to be. 

Maybe he should check, make sure you're doing okay. Look in the window really quick. Getting out of the car and walking the short distance, he looks over to your car to see that you still had some toilet paper and paper towels in the back seat. Knowing that you would be back, he decides to help you out. Opening up the door as quietly as possible he grabs the items, and takes them up to the door. Putting them in between the screen door and main door, he turns around to leave.

His eyes look in the kitchen window, to see you putting away your items. Your back is to him, so you don’t notice. You seem lost in your own world, on auto pilot putting things away. Dean takes a moment to appreciate that he can see you up close. His eyes scan the room, noticing the post-it notes all over. He never remembers you having so many of them before. He can’t read what they say, but they are everywhere; on the cabinets, counter tops, table, Was your memory getting worse? 

Panic, and anger - at himself more than anything -  sets in.

*******

Y/N POV

“I love her Sam, I am in love with her…I can’t…no I won’t lose her, I need to tell her how I feel…”

“You don’t love me, Winchester” your voice stops Dean from rambling on the lies that you know, in the end, he doesn’t mean.

Dean turns to see you standing there, your eyes red from crying. But you're not crying now; no, now you  look  pissed, like you want to kick some ass - and Dean’s is the closest one. “Got to go Sam.” Dean quickly says, ending the call. “What do you mean I don’t love you. Of course I do, I….”

You hold up a hand, and stop Dean from saying anything more. “No, you don’t. People like me, we don’t have sexy knights to save us. To fall in love with us, to whisk us away, and want to play house with.” Determine to get this all out, to get your point across and make him accept reality. 

“We are your best friend, the girl you call on Friday nights when your date falls through, or you strike out with the bartender. We are your ‘wing woman’, we pick you up, dust you off, and send you back out into the world. We build your confidence up, while we sit on the sidelines alone.”

“Y/N that's not true…” Dean starts to protest.

“Let me finish, I have to get this out.” taking a breath, you can see he’s hurt, that he wants to argue, to explain his side. “Yes, you care for me, but you don’t love me, and you're not In love with me. You're in love with this idea of a life outside of hunting, you love the idea of playing house.” Closing the gap between you, even though you know better than to get  this close to him. You're playing with fire, but you're desperate to feel him. 

“You're right, I am in love with the idea of an apple pie life. But I want that life with you, no one else.” Dean interjects before you can shut him down, shut down what is going on between you two before it can even start. 

Taking a chance, he grabs your hand and brings it up to his chest and places it over his heart. “Can’t you feel my heart? It’s racing for you. It always has, it always will.”

 Feeling the softness of the white t-shirt between your fingers, you take a breath and inhale the smell of him. “Sooner or later we both know this won’t be enough, that I won’t be enough.” You talk to his chest, not wanting or able to look him in the eye, your voice low and shaky. “You're going to leave me, sideline me, and only blow through town when you need something.”

“That's not true! You have always wanted your own life. I always wanted to protect you as much as I could. The things that Sam and I deal with, the people and monsters we hunt, if anything ever happens…you are a vulnerability that they will exploit. I know it.” 

“Maybe. Even more reason why you have to go…and never come back…” Glancing up to see the gut punch you just delivered written on his face. You try to take a step back.

Dean won’t let you go, bringing a hand around your waist, holding you. “What?! No! I won’t cut you out of my life. I now know I was stupid for ever doing that. For letting you live alone, or at the very least, not in the same state as the bunker.” He practically commands, with no hesitation. How could you think he would ever agree to this?   

“Y/N, I need you in my life. You can’t deny that there is something between us.” His words are sweet, his voice is low as he leans into you. His breath fans over your face, as his hands caress your cheek. “Please, I need you.” 

His lips are so close to yours, that if you lean ever so slightly, you would finally know how soft his lips are. Would they fulfill your fantasies? God, maybe you should live in this fantasy for as long as you can, screw being logical. Let it be a future Y/N problem, present Y/N wants to know what it's like to be wanted by Dean Winchester. “I…Dean…”

*******

 Y/N and Dean POV 

“Dean, what are you doing here?” Your voice pulls him from the memory of that night, and he looks to see you standing at the door, one hand holding open the screen door. 

Oh fuck, well, this wasn’t the plan at all. Giving her a smile, “Hey Y/N, I was in the neighborhood…thought I would…”

“So you're stalking me now?”

“Hehe, no, I said I was in the neighborhood, wanted to see how you are…you look good.” He says, letting his eyes look at you. You did look good, but tired, your eyes didn’t shine like they normally did before; the spark, the hint of twinkle is gone.

“Liar, I look like shit, but thanks.” You quip, knowing that you don’t look good at all. Wearing a ratty hoodie and jeans, you opted for comfort over trying to impress anyone. “Well, thanks for stopping by.” You say, giving him a fake smile and turning to walk back in the house. 

“Umm…Y/N, I could, I mean Sam could use your help with something, he knew I was going to be passing through and wanted me to stop by and ask for some help.” Quickly thinking on his feet, he creates an excuse. He didn’t want to leave yet, this is the most he has talked to you since that night. He would be damned if he was going to let you leave so soon. 

You turn back to look at Dean, trying to gauge if he was telling the truth or not. Sam had your number, and you were still speaking to the younger Winchester - he didn’t break your heart and live up to everything you knew would happen. “Why didn’t he call me?” You question, wanting to make Dean work for it. He wasn’t getting in that easy!

He takes a few steps towards you, “well, like I said, he knew I was in the area.” One step lower from you, his green eyes lock with yours, silently pleading with you to let him in. “He wanted me to pick up a lore book on Pixies, and said you had a copy that we don't have in the library.”

“Fine, come in. I will go grab it.” You reply, turning away from him, letting him catch the door before it slams in his face. 

Dean shucks off his jacket and boots, and looks around while you go back to find the book. He can now see the post-its in detail, reminding you where your keys, jacket, bag should be put. Making his way to the kitchen, cabinets are labeled with what should be in them: dry food, dishes, silverware. Daily schedule on the fridge. “Having fun snooping?” Your sarcastic tone has him turning on his heels to see you standing in the doorway with a book in hand. 

“Umm…sorry…” he says sheepishly, hating  that he got caught. He can see you're not amused, and he is really going to have to lay on the charm to win you back. 

“Yeah, well at least I am keeping the post-it company in business. Here is the book.” You say handing it to him.

Dean takes it, and looks at it, giving it a nod, “Thanks, yep this is it.” 

“Okay, well, you better get going, since Sam is in ‘desperate’ need of it and all.” Your voice is flat, not in the mood to deal with him. “You know where the door is.” You add, just turning that knife even deeper. 

“Look, Y/N can we talk?” Dean can tell you're not your usual self, and he really wants to get you back.

“Oh now you want to talk? You sure as hell didn’t want to talk for four months. Didn’t want to talk when you woke up the next morning regretting that kiss, regretting what we said to each other, the promises you made.” You snap at him, the frustration building in you. Why does it always have to be on his time? God you were just getting over him, right?

“I know. I was a jerk, it was a dick move, and I am sorry.”

“You're sorry, really?That's all you have to say?” Turning away from him, just looking at him and his sad puppy dog face, you want to smack him. Fuck, you want to hit yourself for being an idiot that night. 

******

“Dean…please…I…” You have to keep strong, tell him to go, you know this won’t end well.

“Please Y/N, You're the only good thing I have in this world, I can’t lose you.” Not waiting for a reply, his lips find yours. 

They're soft, perfect, molded to fit yours, and gentle, Dean doesn’t force his way. Pulling away, when your lungs start to burn,you lock eyes with him. Lust blown, his lips slightly pink. No words are exchanged, you silently say everything you need to him at that moment, and he seems to understand. Bringing his hands to cup your face, he goes back in to kiss you more, letting his tongue swipe across your lips. You allow his tongue to dance with yours. 

Fumbling your way to the couch, Dean falls back first, and you do your best not to land on top of him completely, giggling at the state you're both in. Dean looks up at you, tucking a few strands of hair behind your ear, and looking up at you lovingly, “God, I love that laugh of yours.” He says, pulling you down on him. Letting you feel what you're doing to him. 

“Dean, I have to be crushing you.” You protest, trying your best but failing at getting out of the vice grip Dean has on your hips. 

“Nope, You're staying right here.” He says, as he starts to pepper kisses down your neck. 

******

“Dean, I begged you to leave! I knew you never wanted me! And yet like an idiot, I fell for your charm and under your spell.” You grit out, turning on your heels and walking away from him. Fuck, you can’t keep doing this! 

“I did ... .I do ...Y/N look at me” Dean pleads, setting the book down he follows you to the living room, grabbing your hand. “Please, let me explain.”

Turning around, you pull your hand back. His touch, like fire, like touching a hot pan. “You know, I thought for a split second you were telling me the truth. That you wanted me like I have always wanted you.” Pain radiates through you, your voice seems to be stuck behind a lump forming in your throat. God, you want to smack him, but at the same time, kiss him.

Dean’s speechless, trying to work out how best to tell you what he was thinking in that split second when he woke up in your arms that day. For one second he felt total bliss, that everything was falling into place; then reality of his life came back into focus.

“I know, it wasn’t my finest hour.”

You laugh at this, you think!? “What is there to explain? We kissed, had a pretty good makeout, groped each other over and under our clothes, but then we both agreed to take it slow. Right?” You ask for confirmation, even though you remember it all too well.

“Yes, but, Y/N, if you just let me…” Dean stumbles to explain.

“But then, I wake up the next morning alone on the couch with a note that says, ‘Hey, Y/N, Sorry, Sammy needs me, will check in soon.’”

The space between you two is nonexistent. You're trying to find anything in those green eyes of his that will refute anything you just said. Anything to explain that you're overreacting, but there is nothing. He has no rebuttal, because it's all true. He walked out on you, like his father did to him and Sam all the time. The worst part was, Dean had Sam to lean on; you were left with no one.

“Like I said, not my finest hour…” he mumbles out.

“Not your goddamn finest hour?ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!” you yell, slamming your fists into his chest and pushing him away.  It does nothing to move him, and takes all your energy out of you. You stumble a bit, then lean back and sit on the arm of the couch.

“Hey, Y/N, please, calm down.'' His voice is heavy with concern, and he tries to help you up so you can sit on the couch.

“Don’t…touch…me…” You cough out. Needing water, you look to find your water bottle is nowhere. “Fuck….I…” You keep coughing, and try to get up.

“Water?” Dean questions. You nod, and try to get back up. “No, sit, I will go get it.” He tells you and quickly goes to the kitchen, and is back with a glass of water in seconds.

You down about half, the cool water helps calm you and your coughing fits. “Thanks” you mumble, not wanting to give him the satisfaction that he ‘saved you again.’ You don’t look at him as you sit down the glass and avoid him at all costs.

Dean takes this as his opportunity to tell you his side. Sitting on the coffee table so he has direct eye contact with you, he reaches for your hand. “Please, Y/N, I am truly sorry. I know I was a jerk for leaving you like that, and for never calling or coming back.”

You stare him down, not  giving him an out on this one. “Go on. You will hear no objection from me on this one.” You reply.

Dean lets out a small sigh that clearly said fuck, alright here we go. “I was fucking scared, okay? I woke up, saw you in my arms, and for a split second I felt like I was home. My first thought was, this is perfection. No monster, no running the roads, crappy dinner food, and sketchy motels.” 

He leans towards you, putting a hand on your knee, and lightly runs his hands up and gives you a knowing smile. “The perfect, sexy, beautiful, girl in my arms, that I can’t wait to wake up and…”

You stop his hand from getting too close to what both you and him want to touch. “Not so fast  Winchester.” Knowing if he keeps going, you are definitely going to end up in a very compromising position. “No, I bet your first thought was, oh fuck what the hell did I do, and how the hell do I get out of it.”

“No, will you let me talk?. God, I see COVID can take your memory, but not your self-hatred or inability to butt in.” 

You hold your hands up in a fake defense, “Please go on.” You quip back, leaning back into the couch. 

Dean shakes his head, at least you’re sassing back, that is a good sign. “I got up, was going to start coffee for us, and while I was in the kitchen, Sam did call…

*******

“Hey Sammy,”

“How’s everything Dean, you kinda left me hanging? Did you and Y/N talk?” Sam asks, feeling like a schoolgirl catching up on the latest gossip between you too.

Dean takes a quick peek into the living room to make sure you're still asleep. “Yeah, everything is good. We talked and I think we are going to take things slow.” Dean explains, as he starts to make the coffee, he recounts most of the conversation between you two. Not all the details though, he wants to keep the really good stuff just for him. 

Sam lets out a sigh, “That's good, I am happy for you both. But now I hate to ask.”

“What is it?”

“Look, I know you still want to take some time, until Y/N is fully healed, but Jody could really use your help. There is something in South Dakota that is running amuck, and she’s worried that Claire is going to try and tackle it herself.”

Oh Claire, how she reminds Dean of himself sometimes, headstrong and just ready to fight anything that wasn’t human. She is a good hunter, but she is young. “Umm…yeah…I am sure I can make something work….”

“Thanks Dean, I am sure it will only be a day or two, and then you can get back to Y/N. I will call Jody and tell her to expect you.” Sam says.

Saying their goodbyes, Dean hangs up the phone, and has to hold back from throwing it across the room in anger. Fuck! Not two seconds, and he’s already been pulled back into the madness. How is he going to explain this to her? She won’t believe him, she will be heartbroken again, think it's her fault, and say that she told him. 

Seeing no other solution - or maybe it was that he didn’t want to wake you and see that pain in your eyes - he takes the cowardly way out. 

*****

“So you went to help Jody, a friend of mine. And didn’t think I would understand?” You question him, after he explains the conversation between him and Sam. 

“Yes…I guess I figure you would just see it as an excuse I came up with to leave you. Which it wasn’t, by the way.”

“But you said you would call, check in. But you didn’t! You couldn’t have been helping Jody this whole time? And even if you were, could you still have called!”

“I wanted to, but as I was driving away, I kept thinking about what you said, that you felt like an afterthought, that I blow through town whenever I need you. Take what I need and leave you with nothing.”

“So you figure, prove me right by ghosting me? Well, thanks Winchester, real fun.” You spit sarcastically, giving his knee a not-so-playful slap and getting up from the couch. “The door is still where you left it, you can see yourself out.” Fucking asshole. I need to get those locks changed tomorrow. You think, making your way to the kitchen to get some more water, to do anything but sit there and keep listening to him.

“Y/N, please. I am sorry, you're not an afterthought. The more that I kept driving, and the longer I pushed off calling you, it made it harder to call you. Because I knew as soon as I did I would lose you.”

“Funny, because the second you left, you lost me Dean. God, I woke up that morning and was devastated. Do you know how much I hate feeling like that?” Not needing him to answer, you lean up against the counter crossing your arms around yourself. Feeling the tears start to fall, you might as well go all the way. 

“You know, I never wanted to be that girl, who cried over a guy, who refused to do anything but sleep on that goddamn couch for two months because it was the last place I felt safe, and whole, and seen. I could still smell you on the pillows and blanket.” 

Taking a breath, you run your hands over your face. Taking another ragged breath, you work up the courage to tell him what you know he should know, but that you're scared to say out loud. “But the thing I hate the most, the one thing that makes me want to scream…is that I still love you.” You laugh at this. Its fucking absurd. Trying your best  to stifle your laughter, but it keeps bubbling out of you in frustration and disbelief 

Dean’s not sure how to react. On the one hand, you say that you still love him, but on the other hand your laughing like the fucking Joker. “Being in love with me is…funny?” he tentatively asks. Taking a few steps towards you, but not closing the distance. 

Wiping the tears from your face, you admit quietly, “yes, because I know, no matter what, I will always let you back in. I guess I am just a masochist that way. I would rather have you in my life, and be heartbroken, than to not have you and still be heartbroken.”

Shaking your head, in disbelief that you actually said those words out loud, and to Dean no less. You look up to see him watching you, waiting. “God I am pathetic…you really should not have saved me that night…” you mumble the last part to yourself. Pushing yourself off the counter, you turn away from him, to straighten up the non-existent mess on the counter. Shit, should not have said that. 

“GOD DAMN IT Y/N!” Dean’s yell booms, causing you to turn around to see Dean seething with rage.    Taking the last few steps towards you, he pulls you into a vice grip of a hold. “Don’t you ever say that again, do you hear me? Do you?” He commands, shaking with hurt and pain. 

He’s not angry at you, he's angry that you don’t understand how much you mean to him. That you hold your life as something subpar. Pulling away slightly, he lets go so he can hold your face in his hands. “Please don’t ever think or say that I shouldn’t have saved you that night.” His green eyes, glassy with tears about to be shed, bore into yours. “You are the only good thing in my life, and I know I have a lot of work to do to gain your trust back, and that my life is messy and chaotic, but please…please….don’t ever think I would regret saving you that night.”

You nod your head in response. “Okay” you whisper, “I promise.” You were taken aback by his outburst; Dean has never raised his voice to you, or looked this broken. Then again, you’ve never been this broken, or joked about that night before either. It was a topic that neither of you ever really discussed, more of an unspoken bond between you two.

Relief seems to wash over him. His hands fall from your face, his arms wrapping them around your waist, not wanting to leave the closeness of you. “I know I have a lot of work to do, and this may be pushing my luck. But can I kiss you?” Giving you a half smile, hoping that will seal the deal.

“Fuck, there’s that Winchester charm,” you joke, smirking as well. Screw it, it's been four months without those lips. You lean in and kiss him. Letting your lips dance with his for a bit, you pull back, “just as good and I remember.” you say cheekily.

“So, should we go make some new memories on that couch of yours?” Dean gives you a wink, walking backwards towards the living room, his arms still around yours.

You have no choice but to follow him, nodding. You know that you have a lot of work to do getting over your own insecurities and self doubt that Dean will get tired of you, or that he will regret being with you. You need to have faith in him, and in yourself, that you are worthy of a happy life with him; whatever that looks like.

[canonicallysoulmates]

J2 Main Panel DC Con 2023

We're gonna jump right into questions:

How long have they been friends?

Jared answers that we all have our beliefs on why we're here, and what here is- this isn't the first lifetime they've been friends. That's so lovely 🥹🥰

He says technically, objectively this time around it was January-February 2005. Jensen says that's when they first met, and that when they met there was certainly a pretty fast connection between them- Jared interrupts to say he was pretty and Jensen was fast...then Jensen says he's gotten faster with age. I'm not gonna make a comment.

Jensen continues by saying that the day they met was the day they were auditioning for the roles in front of the studio and the network, and usually, there are a few different actors for the same role but when he walked into the building it was just Jared in there, and when they were called in they were called in together so they only read with each other and they were doing the scene where Dean tries to convince Sam to go on the road with him, and Jensen says immediately he was like 'oh this guy knows how to play, I can play ball with this guy' that there was a sensibility Jared had with his delivery and he was reacting to everything he was saying and it felt really natural.

They're asked to walk out and give everyone in the room a few minutes to talk it over, so they waited until they were told to go back in that they were going to be given some notes, when they walked back in the room everyone stood up and clapped and told them congratulations. So they left knowing they were about to work together and exchanged phone numbers. A day or two later Jared was inviting Jensen over to his place to play ping pong, it was then and there their friendship was born.

Jared tells two more stories. He lived in the LA Valley area and there are a lot of adult videos filmed in the area, and he lived next to an ex-porn actor and so Jensen came over, and they're two 20yr old guys, they're both in relationships but during the night they're playing ping pong and they have a keg, and all these actresses are coming in and out and Jensen was like 'where do you live dude?'.

Then, he's never told this story publically and he wonders if Jensen remembers it, but one of his makeup artists on Gilmore Girls had been talking about eye patches because he gets a little squinty if he doesn't sleep or has allergies- his eyes are really reactive. So, when he and Jensen met for the first time during the auditions, he thinks it was after the 1st or 2nd read, he asked him how he got his eyes so big because he thought Jensen knew a trick to make them look bigger. And Jensen was so confused.

Jensen doesn't remember that but he remembers Jared was squinty when he was younger, he was so brooding.

He also says he was worried Jared was going to tell another story involving a Chrissy from Oregon who was a neighbor that came over and was very nice, and they had a very interesting conversation. x

Next, question comes from Philemon Chambers, for those who don't know he played Augustus in Walker Independence, he wants to know who won ping pong?

Jared answers that in ping pong they were pretty split, pretty 50/50. And that he's probably still sore from playing ping pong with Jensen 20yrs ago.

Jensen says it was a bad idea when they took the ping pong table over to set because whenever they had a break, like lighting breaks which a lighting set up can be 20 to 45mins, they'd go next stage to play ping pong but the longer the break the sweatier they'd get so they'd come back to set and it would cause a delay cause the makeup department would have to cool them down. Until one day the ping pong table just dissapeared.

He says that's how the producers and directors would govern them they'd just take shit away for example the Impala had like a police spotlight at one point but got taken away because they'd blind the camera operator, and they also lost a horn during a certain point of the show because every time one of the camera operators leaned across the hood they'd honk it.

Jared says they wouldn't ask them to stop doing something they'd just take it away. Someone mentions the radio, Jensen says that's right the radio used to work it doesn't. x

What advice do they have for someone embarking on their 20s?

Jensen says in your 20's you still have so far to go in the best way so don't get hung up on stuff that will seem trivial 10yrs from now. Don't waste your time, there's a book called Don't Sweat the Small Stuff he recommends find it, read it, use it. But also even if you just take that title of don't sweat the small stuff because we do inevitably as people it's what we do, we focus on things that bring us to places emotionally that have no purpose that kinda stuff is just gonna be gone. He would say 20s is the perfect time to explore, have fun, live your life, dream big, and don't sweat the small stuff.

Jared agrees and adds don't sign long-term contracts, don't operate heavy machinery, don't drive but seriously your 20s are not the latter part of your life they're the beginning of your life. And he will add as well explore your first 20 years, explore how you got to where you are, the earlier you look into what's made you you, and what works and doesn't the better it'll be he started late, he started when he was like 35 and he's been working back trying to figure out what happened when he was 0-20 that formed who he is these days. Be curious, be kind, be compassionate. x

Looking back what's their favorite funny story in the time that they've known each other?

Jared says there are so many but this one popped up in his head, and it's the story of how when the twins were going to be born Jensen left his passport in Austin by mistake. In case anyone doesn't know the story the quick version of it is that D was set to give birth to the twins, and Jensen is usually very responsible but something told Jared to ask him to go touch his passport just to make sure he had it (because they were in Van filming and needed to get back to the States for the birth) and Jensen thought Jared was playing a prank on him but he checked anyways and it was not in his bag. He asks Jared about it he doesn't know where it is he wasn't messing with him, turns out Jensen left it by mistake in a jacket pocket in Austin. They got in contact with a law enforcement friend they have who contacted TSA or something and explained the situation so they were able to fly out of Canada and Jensen was able to be there for the twins' birth.

Jensen says this is an 18yr friendship they've had going, for the majority of it they've spent more time with each other than any other human being on the planet, so there are a lot of stories it's hard to pick one. He'll say what he misses about them working together so often was the times in between set-ups and shots when they would go and just spend time in the trailer. In most shows, they yell cut and actors go to their respective spaces but they didn't do that he would go to Jared's trailer sit on his couch, watch tv, and just hang out, and it was weird that they'd do that cause they never get tired of each other which he thinks speaks volumes when you spend that much time together and he thinks it's why they're still here today. 😍

When was a time that they had a hard decision to make? Something they weren't sure about but it ended up paying off.

Jared thinks he and Jensen have a similar story that could be an answer. Probably the most integral and scariest decision he ever made was to quit college and drive out to LA to try and be an actor. To go back to the 20yr question they had been asked earlier, he was 17 at the time when he did this, but the same rule goes and that's try on all the hats that you can, give it a shot, you're still learning who you are. He's 41, a husband, a father, a friend and he's still learning who he is and why he is who he is. In your 20s before you have a spouse, or kids, or a mortgage, or whatever it's a great time to go give it a shot, you rather try and learn that it's not for you than never try.

Jensen asks Jared if he had a backup plan. He did, it was to go back to college. He had some hours logged in already due to AP courses.

Jensen echoes what Jared said, one of the many things they have in common is that their origin story is very similar. He was set to go to college, courses were set, had a dorm room and roommate assigned, and then last minute just a few weeks before he had to report on campus, he said he was going to Hollywood and giving acting a shot. His dad gave him 6 months, they were incredibly supportive but his dad told him to give it a semester, and if he realized it wasn't for him to come back and start school in the second semester. He drove off and never came back, he started working right away and just kept working and kept working and it's like Jared said it's those little decisions that can have a big effect but don't put so much weight on every decision thinking it's gonna have a big effect, he's had a ton of decisions in his life that have had little or no effect at all.

There's another decision, he was on a soap opera for a number of years, he did 3 years and they wanted to extend his contract to do 3 more. As a 20yr old at the time he found it amazing, he did a good enough job they wanted to reward him with a bigger contract and the pay was going to triple- it was a dream come true type of thing and he had a bunch of congrats and people on set telling him it looked like he was gonna be there a couple more years but one amazing actress pulled him aside and told him no, that he wasn't he needed to go. And not in the way of wanting him gone but in the way of there are other things for him out there and he needed to go explore more and so against all odds he did, and that's a decision that has paid off. x

Do they have any shows or movies they re-watch or books they re-read that are really cherished? And why do they mean something to them?

Jared has some feel-good shows, he tries not to re-read books he just feels like there are so many he would love to read but he has re-read Into the Air by Jon Krakauer. And when he finds himself rewatching shows it's from his childhood like he'll put on Garfield or Simpsons. Someone in the crowd yells out Ninja Turtles and he says Ninja Turtles for sure. Jensen asks him which turtle he is and Jared replies he's probably Michelangelo but his favorite is Donatello. He thinks it's because he could always find a stick and hit people with it; his parents wouldn't let him have nunchucks, or the sai, or swords but he could always find a stick and pretend he was Donatello. And he had a purple outfit which was pretty cool; someone in the crowd mentions Leonardo and Jared says he was also pretty cool at which point Jensen says he thought Donatello's color was blue but Jared corrects him and tells him that no Leonardo is blue, Raphael is red, and Michaelangelo is orange. So when he does re-watch things it's from his childhood.

Jensen says this is unintentional, the show is just always on but his 10yr old daughter has found Friends, and he had forgotten how really entertaining that show is he literally doesn't know what station it is on but it's always on so anytime they're in the kitchen, she'll come in, put it on and sit down, and he'll be doing stuff while it's on and he'll just hear "pivot!" and start laughing. That's another thing, he had forgotten how many iconic sayings came from that show. It's a powerhouse of a show, but as far as a genre-type show he's kinda like Jared once he watches it going back and rewatching it he feels like he's missing out on the opportunity of seeing something new. He does have films that he keeps on his ipad whenever he's traveling or something that are downloaded, and there's one particular movie that he doesn't watch from beginning to end he usually just fast-forwards through to watch certain scenes of No Country For Old Men cause he thinks it's a masterclass in film making.

Jared comments he's like that with Inglorious Bastards, and Jensen replies yeah, that anything Tarantino like Hateful Eight he's been watching scenes of it, and it could be a stage play. But he gets the wanting to go back and kind of revisit those things cause it does give you those nostalgic emotions but also you know new experiences like he's sharing this with his daughter so that's kind of a fun new experience.

Jared says he's questioning his earlier statement about wanting to read new things cause if you watch the same show or movie or even the same book at different points in your life what you pick up will be different so maybe he'll start binging SPN. He will say without a word of a lie he could watch 15.20 reaction videos for an hour and cry every time, he thinks he's watched every single one. But he'd be interested to go and revisit the show. x

The next fan asks about a fuck it list. It's like a bucket list except that instead of waiting you're going to say fuck it and do it now, if you can, and their reactions are hilarious seriously y'all have to go watch this moment. But what would their current fuck it list item be?

Jared asks who or what? And then goes "okay, so just here and now" and moves towards Jensen with his tongue out 👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀

Jensen moves away before Jared can get to him and goes "I told you I'm faster with old age". These men are unhinged. Unhinged I tell you!

Getting back on track, Jared is stumped on an answer, he doesn't know then he asks the fan if they have kids cause he thinks it changes once you have kids and says for him he would love to travel. The fan asks if with his kids and the silence speaks a thousand words, then after he pauses he says that no, they can travel as well somewhere they're welcome to do so but that just in case his wife sees this on youtube he says that he wants to travel with the kids and his wife cause he loves them so very much. Believe it.

Jensen says no, that he doesn't have either a fuck it list or a bucket list he has responsibilities. He can't just go play, he has a house to feed and lights to keep on. He's gonna be honest he has been asked bucket list before he had not been asked fuck it list but he honestly doesn't have either and he means that he's still at the age where he has responsibilities, he has things that he thinks he needs to do, he has things that he needs to get done, and things he wants to get done in order to facilitate certain things in his life. Some of those bring him joy and some of those are just responsibilities that he needs to take care of because he's an adult. x

Final question, any updates on the Impala's?

Both of their respective cars were sent to a body shop just out of Houston, between Houston and Austin, a very reputable place that Clif found for them, and they're getting all the work done that they wanted to get done but Jensen's took longer cause it needed to be used for The Winchester. And so he told them he had to pull Baby out of the shop and it went to NOLA, filmed for a while then finally got back in the shop a few months ago. Jensen thinks it's supposed to be ready this month. He'll go pick her up and then go cruise the back roads of America, and he tells Jared he'll go pick him up and Jared says he'll be there. Jensen says they haven't done it yet but they do joke about just driving around town at some point, they may have to like put some go pros or something on the side.

Jared says his only goal with the Impala is to somehow or another get Mark Sheppard into the trunk. He will say that there's this thing called live water it's supposed to be like ph balanced water. (It's unprocessed water. Or even simpler terms it's water from the river, or a spring, or a lake except river water isn't profitable but if you call it live water it is!) Anyways, he has a subscription for it, cause of course he does, and it's like 5 a month or 5 a week. The point is every third Friday they get a delivery. You leave the empty ones on your driveway and they take them and put the new ones, and the guy who delivered last time was seemingly a fan of SPN, and the garage door was open with the Impala in there and the pic of Sam on a horse from French Mistake is right next to it leaning up against a wall and Jared was walking the dogs, and the guy who delivers looked at Jared kind of confused, looked into the garage saw the Impala and the picture shook his head, said 'dude' and walked away. x

As the panel comes to an end Jensen mentions that he had gotten asked when he and Rob Benedict came up with the last question song, he doesn't know and Rob doesn't either but Richard Speight says that he does know why it started in the first place. It was so he and Rob would stop getting booed when they walked on stage to announce the end of the panel.

Before the boys walk off stage Jared says he feels inspired and motivated to say something: Be kind, be silly, be goofy, be yourself, and share snacks. 💛

J2 Main Panel DC Con

[midnightstar-90]

Stuck

Mindy Meeks Martin x Fem! Reader

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Main Masterlist | Scream Masterlist

Requested by Anonymous: “Mindy and y/n are dating and anika is about to fall of the ladder and y/n grabs anika before she does and pulls anika up, and after they all go to the hospital and get patched up and, Mindy does a stab marathon w y/n bc mindys proud of her :)”

Summary: Ghostface attacks the group, and somehow everyone survives.

Warnings: SPOILERS, SPOILERS, SPOILERS Angst, Gore, Stabbing, Blood, Signs of PTSD

A/N: I hated writing this on my phone, but I guess that is what I get for being clumsy. 😩

Anyways, this request was fun to write. I did change a few things from the movie, but not too much. Minor details.

Don’t read if you don’t want Scream 6 spoilers.

And I hope you guys enjoy it. ☺️

Words: 3.4K

Halloween.

A day that emits a constant fear out of me. Thanks to Gale’s books that she continues to write (no matter how many times she gets punched and ridiculed for it), and the Stab movies that follow, Ghostface costume sales have gone through the roof. Everywhere I turn, a Ghostface is lingering nearby, and it doesn’t help that the killings were starting up again. It takes a lot out of me not to pull out the small pocket knife that I’ve been carrying since the Legacy killings back in Woodsboro.

After Sam and Tara were attacked at a bodega, Sam insisted on the whole friend group staying over, including our friends who didn’t fall victim to the events that happened a year ago. So Chad and Tara were in the process of making dinner for everyone, and Mindy and I decided to help out by preparing the table. Everyone else was off doing their own things, all around the house.

I place the last set of utensils that I had in my hand down on the table and look up at Mindy. Everything about her was mesmerizing to me. From the day I met her, I knew I didn’t deserve her, but she chose me, in the end. And the way her mind works, as if everything was a movie, intrigued me. Her thoughts were what made Mindy Mindy, and just the thought made me smile. Nothing had changed about Mindy, besides her hair.

‘I love her.’

Those 3 words are all I could think about when I am around Mindy. But I couldn’t admit that to Mindy, because the last time I admitted my feelings, I was stabbed right after.

That night at Amber’s house constantly replayed in my head.

“I like you, Mindy,” I said with a blush. I shyly looked over at the girl next to me. A shaky breath left my mouth as my Y/E/C eyes met her beautiful brown eyes. The original Stab movie that we were watching reflected off the iris in her eye.

I watched as Mindy’s blank face slowly shifted into a grin. I could see the gears turning in her head as her soft fingers caressed my cheek. “Oh, my naive little Y/N. You are so cute when you act all shy. You know, not all my movie knowledge is in the horror department. I know the basic signs of romance. The tensing of the body whenever I get close. The constant blushing anytime I speak directly to you. The-”

“You could have just said that you like me back,” I spoke with a sigh as my head shifted away from the girl. I hear a soft chuckle before a pair of soft, plump lips press against my cheek. She slowly pulled away, making my body fill with heat. “I like you too,” She mumbled into my ear.

“I-I have to go to the bathroom. Brb.” I nervously stood from my spot on the couch and walked out of the room. Mindy was left confused as I rushed down the hall and into the bathroom, locking the door behind me.

I stood in front of the bathroom mirror, hoping that maybe I could give myself some confidence, but it didn’t work. The sound of someone trying to open the door echoed through the bathroom. “Someone’s in here,” I called out to whoever was at the door, but then they began to knock. I assumed it was Mindy trying to get me back to the movie. I still wasn’t ready to face the girl, so I responded with, “Mindy, this isn’t funny. I told you I had to go to the restroom. Cool your jets. We can finish the movie in just a sec.” My voice was still a little shaky as I looked at myself in disappointment.

But it didn’t stop there. I realized it wasn’t Mindy when whoever was at the door began to pound causing me to swiftly turn around and open the door. “Hey, I said-” A cloaked hand covered my mouth as I felt a sudden pain in my abdomen. It was the worst pain I had ever felt in my entire life. Ghostface stood in front of me with a knife wedged in my stomach. He pulled the metal weapon out of my body and I grabbed my stomach in pain. Blood pooled through my fingers, leaving my hands stained. I felt a scream leave my throat before Ghostface tackled me down to the ground, and everything went dark.

“Y/N,” Mindy calls out to me. I was back in Sam and Tara’s apartment, and Mindy was standing across from me. I looked down, inspecting myself for any stab wounds or blood, but nothing appeared to be wrong. ‘I must have zoned out,’ I thought to myself, looking back up at Mindy.

“You good?” She asks, giving me a concerned look. I nod, trying to ease her worry, but it didn’t. “You zoned out,” She says, grabbing ahold of my face, turning it from side to side to see if anything was wrong.

“I’m fine, Mindy,” I mutter as I push away her hands. I can tell she doesn’t believe me, but she ignores it. I don’t blame her. I knew that if she did something like that, I would be worried too, but ever since I checked out of the hospital last year, I hated when people asked me if I was okay. I felt as if I was being coddled, and I hated that feeling.

Mindy’s gaze moved from off of me and onto Chad and Tara. I watched as her frown became a smirk. “Look,” she repeats, aggressively slapping my shoulder. I wince in pain as I grab ahold of the shoulder she slapped, and I turn around, facing the direction she was pointing at.

Tara and Chad were talking it up in the kitchen. They weren’t physically showing affection for the other, but you could tell by the look in their eyes that they had feelings for each other. It reminded me of how Mindy and I looked at each other before we got together.

“They’re so cute together, and they don’t even know it,” I said, staring at the two with a loving smile.

Mindy began to cringe at my comment. “It’s not cute, it’s annoying, and disgusting to watch.” She then began making gagging sounds, catching the attention of Chad and Tara. I elbowed Mindy for doing what she did, and shaking my head in disbelief, but she continued to speak. “Will you two just make out already?” She asked.

Chad fires back, “Mindy, that is so inappropriate, dude.” Mindy throws her hands up in surrender and I just watch in amusement. “Okay- Whatever. Just hurry it up,” she groaned.

We made our way to the kitchen with Chad and Tara, right Sam walked in with a bottle of wine. Mindy tried telling Sam that we didn’t need to be here, but Sam didn’t agree. “Oh, please,” she scoffed at Mindy. “You and Y/N just want to be alone together.” Chad and Tara laughed as Mindy and I shrugged and gave each other knowing looks.

The conversation then went on to how we would all be safe as one rather than be in separate locations. Chad looked around the group before saying, “This’ll be so fun. A little sleepover with the Core 5.” Everyone looked at Chad, questioning him about the nickname he just gave the group.

He passed a high five around to everyone, hoping to confirm the nickname, which everyone disagreed with. But when he got to me, I cringed at the nickname, but I felt bad. Being the “people pleaser” that I am, I high five the boy back in pity, but Chad didn’t see it that way. “Yesss,” he cheered as the 3 other girls began to berate me for agreeing with the boy.

Anika calls us into the living room where the tv screen shows a news report. It spoke about how the police’s main suspect in the murder against Jason and Greg was Sam. I look over at Sam, giving her a sympathetic look as I begin to notice that her body is tense and she looked as if all the air had been knocked out of her.

I look back at the tv when a video of the frat party came on. Sam quickly moves from behind the couch to turn off the tv, and goes to sit at the dining room table. Tara’s the first one to engage in conversation with the girl before Chad, Mindy, and I join in.

We talk for some time, trying to cheer the girl up. Chad reminds all of us why we all came to New York together, which sparks something we never thought we’d hear. “We are the Core fucking Five,” Mindy says, prompting Chad to pull Mindy and I into a hug. Mindy and I give each other a look before rolling our eyes with a smile.

“Yeah, we are,” he cheers. I shake my head “no” at the boy as Tara and Sam watch us, also wearing a smile. We try to get Tara to say it, but she’s too stubborn.

“I’ve been sleeping with cute boy, from across the hall,” Sam says out of the blue. We all give each other a look before cheering.

“I knew it. I knew it. I fucking knew it,” I say over everyone else’s confirmations. We all stick our hands into the middle of the table, initiating what Chad called a “Core 5” high-five.

It wasn’t until Sam’s phone went off for all of us to go bizarre. It was Danny, AKA cute boy from across the hall. Tara grabs Sam’s phone and acts as if she answered the phone. “So, uh, what are your intentions?” She asks, earning laughs from all around the table.

Sam tried grabbing her phone from her sister, but Tara was quick to push her hand away. When she gets the phone back she declines Danny’s call, saying she’ll call him back.

Moans began to sound from Quinn’s room, just as Sam put her phone down, which made for another joke at the table. When banging sounds started, all our phones went off, signaling a group text. We open our phones to a picture of Ghostface strangling Quinn in her room, and suddenly time just stopped.

I sat in my seat, frozen. I continued to stare at the image as everyone stood up. I felt as if I couldn’t move. As if I was paralyzed. It wasn’t until Ghostface threw Quinn’s dead body out of the room, and revealed himself for me to finally look up.

When my eyes met the dark eyes of the Ghostface mask, I could feel as if whoever was under there was staring me down. I could practically see the smirk on their face. I had a bad feeling about tonight.

Tara and Chad quickly ran out the door as Mindy ran towards the masked killer. Ghostface slacked Mindy’s arm and she fell in pain. I quickly stood from my spot and ran towards Mindy. “Mindy!” I screamed at the top of my lungs.

Ghostface was beginning to attack Mindy again, but Anika moved the attention off of her by attacking them. Ghostface began to choke Anika, stabbing her in the stomach. I froze in my spot, next to the table as I began to remember the pain I felt when Richie stabbed me the same way.

“Y/N!” I heard Mindy scream. Her screams quickly pulled me out of my trance. I grabbed a dining room chair and made my way over to Ghostface and Anika. The girls screams filled the room as Ghostface dug deeper into Anika which their knife. I lifted the chair over my head and broke it against Ghostface’s back, causing the killer to topple over.

I helped Mindy and Anika stand as I passed Anika off to Mindy, and told her to run. Mindy did as I told her before a cloaked hand grabbed my shoulder and slammed me into the wall. Ghostface stood in front of me, staring at me for a second before stabbing me in the stomach. All the pain that I felt last year rushed back to me as I screamed in agony.

Ghostface twisted the knife in my stomach before yanking it out, causing me to scream louder. I held my stomach in pain, as blood poured out of me. Somehow this felt worse than the first time. Ghostface raised the knife, ready to attack when Sam came up behind them and smacked them over the head with a knife block. Ghostface toppled over, causing the knife to drop off of their hand. The knife slashed my shoulder and I cried out in pain.

“Shit,” I cried as Sam helped me up. We rushed into Sam’s room, where we found Anika and Mindy holding themselves in pain. Sam locked her door before Ghostface could enter. When the banging stopped, Sam remembered the bathroom door was still open, and with Mindy being the closest, she told her to close it.

“Ah, fuck, that guy’s dead,” I heard from Mindy. She began to scream, so I moved as fast as I could to help her. She was struggling to close the door as Ghostface attempted to slash her with their knife. I pulled Mindy back into the room, allowing for Sam to close and lock the door before Ghostface could enter.

Sam and Danny made a plan to escape while Ghostface banged against the door. Mindy held the door shut as I pushed the dresser against the door.

Danny passed a ladder over, telling us to climb over. Sam called me over, but Mindy and I were busy trying to keep Ghostface out. We both urged Sam to go first, which she did hesitantly.

When Sam got over, I turned Mindy and looked her in the eye. “I don’t want to lose you. I don’t know what I would do if you died and I lived. You have to go first, Mindy,” I said through my tears. Mindy shook her head and continued to mumble “no” repeatedly as she cried. I wiped her tears with my bloody fingers as I nodded yes. “You have to go, Mindy. If not for me, then do it for Chad.”

She stared me in the eyes for a total of five seconds before she gave me a soft, yet passionate kiss on the lips. I pulled her closer almost like a goodbye kiss, but she pulled away and said, “I’ll see you on the other side.” I saluted her as she exited through the window.

I waited a few seconds before making sure the door was secure. I made my way to Anika. “It’s okay. We’re gonna get you to a hospital. We just have to get you over to Danny’s. Come on,” I said, helping Anika walk over to the window with her arm around my shoulders.

She pulled herself away from me, leaning against the wall. “No, Y/N, you go. I’ll be fine. Go first,” Anika spoke through her pain. I watched as her blood Oozed from her stomach, where she held herself.

I refused to take no for an answer. I grabbed the girl and basically pushed her out the window. She was in the most pain, so she took longer to climb over.

I looked over at the door, seeing Ghostface was almost in. I hurriedly began to climb out the window, even with Anika still climbing over. I rushed to be directly behind Anika as the shouts from Danny’s got louder. I looked behind me, seeing Ghostface standing at the window. When I looked toward Mindy, the ladder began to rattle. I look back at Ghostface, seeing them shaking the ladder.

“Anika, we have to move quicker,” I spoke, trying to hold my balance. Anika sat frozen on the ladder. “Come on, Anika.”

“I know. I’m scared,” she cried. I noticed that her grip wasn’t holding on as well as mine and that with one more shake she’d be done for. I looked at where Anika was and where we were from Danny’s apartment and I took a leap of faith. I gently pushed Anika close enough to grab Sam’s hand.

She quickly pulled her in before another shake came to the ladder. I crawled a little more before feeling myself start to slip. “You got this Y/N,” I heard Mindy call out. But between the constant shaking and the major loss of blood, I didn’t feel like I had this.”

I felt my leg fall through the gap in the ladder as another shake came about. I slipped, feeling myself scream and close my eyes, but I didn’t feel myself falling. I’ve been on enough drop towers to know that this certainly wasn’t it.

I opened my eyes and there I was, holding onto the ladder as if I was on the monkey bars. I laughed at my amazing reflexes, but it didn’t last long for another shake. I tried my best to ignore the pain from the stab wounds and I began to climb. I felt like a little kid again. Like I was at the playground. I tried channeling those thoughts before I made it to the last bar.

Danny reached his hands out from between the bars. I accepted his help and shakily grabbed his hand. He attempted to pull me up through the bars, which proved to be more difficult than I thought. As my body slipped through the bars, my stomach slid against them causing me to scream in pain. Danny didn’t flinch, only mumbling “sorry” over and over again, continuing to pull me up. Sam joined in and I eventually made it through, but I’d lost so much blood that I just passed out.

I woke up in the hospital. Mindy was the only one in the room. She sat next my bed while holding my hand, but her attention wasn’t on me. It was on the tv, which was playing the original stab movie.

“You’re not finishing the movie without me are you?” I questioned with a raspy voice.

Shocked, she looked over at me, pulling me into a hug. I groaned in pain causing her to quickly let go. “Sorry, I’m just happy you’re awake,” she said, looking down at me with a happy smile. Tears welled up in her eyes as she watched me. I watched her also, noticing that she only wiped her tears when she sniffled.

“Where is everyone?” I asked, looking around.

Mindy smiled, “You missed everything, babe.” I looked at her confused before telling her to continue. “Well, how do I start? You’ve been in a medically induced coma for 3 days. Doctor said Ghostface really messed you up, and that you almost didn’t make it. But here you are,” she said, adding flare with her hands.

“So is it over?” I questioned, eager to hear about everything.

“Yes, Ethan, Quinn, and Officer Bailey turned out to be the Ghostfaces taunting us. And-“

“Wait… Quinn was one of the Ghostface? I thought she was dead.”

“And that’s why you shouldn’t trust someone with a cop for a father. They faked her death with Officer Bailey arriving first to switch the bodies,” She explained.

I shook my head in disbelief. I took my unused hand and tried to hide my face in it. Mindy squeezed the hand she was holding before continuing. “You saved Anika. She probably wouldn’t have made it if you didn’t push her through. She also stayed in the hospital. In the end, Gale and Kirby almost died, but they survived. I was stabbed on the subway. Chad somehow survived a shit load of jabs at his abdomen, and Sam and Tara ended up getting stitches. So far, everyone is getting discharged tomorrow.”

“That’s good,” I softly spoke before my face scrunched in confusion. “Wait, you were stabbed?” I asked, concerned.

“Yes. Keep up, babe,” she said quickly as if she didn’t want to talk about it. “Want to have a Stab marathon, like old times?”

I smiled at the girl and rolled my eyes. “Sure. But we are talking about this later. Understand?” I scowled at her.

“Yes, mom,” she mocked with a salute.

Mindy restarted the first stab movie, sitting back into her chair. As soon as the movie started, I pulled her into the hospital bed with me, and we started our marathon.

A/N: So, I rewatched the movie to write this, and it took me two watches to realize how much these mfs be fucking Ghostface up, and yet the mfs behind the mask don’t have no bruises, wounds, or nothing. I’m sooo confused.😐🤷🏽‍♀️

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[stephstars08]

Still Alive ~ Chapter Nine (Last Chapter)

Ethan Landry x Reader

Warnings: Adult Language, After math of last chapter, A little bit of Angst but Fluff at the end, Mental Breakdown, Mention of Blood, Past Trauma, Mention of Daddy Issues, and Anxiety. (Sorry if I forgot any!)

Word Count: 2,397

Author’s Note: And here we are, the final chapter! Thank you to each and everyone of you for reading this story! It warmed my heart seeing you all comment and tell me how much you loved this story. It means so much to me that you all enjoyed my writing. I enjoy writing but I do have my insecurities about it so thank you so much for your kind messages. I know I already mentioned this but I wanted to say it again, I will be taking this coming week off on here so I won’t be posting since I have some personal things going on and also wanted to take some time off to catch up on some more writing. My inbox will still be opened so don’t be afraid to message me anything! I hope you all enjoy the last chapter and again thank you so much for reading this book. Don’t be afraid to tell me what you all think of the final chapter!

Y/N was at the hospital getting her side wrapped up. The doctor told her that she was lucky that the bullet just grazed her side. “Okay, Ms. Riley. You are all patched up.” The nurse told her. “Thank you.” Y/N said in a soft tone. “You’re welcome.” The nurse said cleaning up everything. “The doctor wants you to take it easy for a couple of days and drink plenty of water.” The nurse told her which earned a nod from Y/N as her answer. After the nurse walked out of the room Y/N carefully stood up and changed into the fresh pair of clothes that Chad and Tara brought her from her apartment. She was being as careful as she could putting on her shirt. They already got rid of her bloody shirt that wasn’t just soaked in her blood right when she got there.

After she was fully clothed, she walked out of the room, closing the door behind her. She just leaned her back on the door and stared down at the wall that was in front of her. She felt completely lost. She didn’t know where to go. She didn’t know who she should go see first since so many people she loves and cares for are lying in a hospital bed. She really wished last night was just one of her horrible nightmares. Y/N decided to just go to the waiting room at the front of the hospital. She knows that she shouldn’t be alone and go find one of her friends but that’s just the first thing that came to her mind and to be honest, she wanted to be alone. Y/N carefully sat down on the bench where not even twenty-four hours ago she was surrounded by all her friends. Now, she’s all alone. She leaned her head against the wall behind her and closed her eyes so the lights on the ceiling didn’t blind her. She sat there in complete silence till someone called her name.

When she opened her eyes, she was met with a surprise. “Sidney!” Y/N said surprised to see her Godmother standing in front of her. “Come here.” Sidney said as she put her arms out towards her. Y/N stood up and gave Sidney a big hug. “I’m so happy to see that you’re okay.” Sidney said as she held Y/N as close as she could but of course was careful of her wounded side. Y/N laid her head on Sidney’s shoulder. “Sam gave me a call catching me up on what happened.” Sidney said pulling away from the hug and putting her hands on both of Y/N’s shoulders. “How’s your side?” Sidney asked with concern in her tone. “Okay, the bullet just grazed me.” Y/N answered her. “Fuck, I should’ve been here.” Sidney said with a heavy sigh. “What? So, you can be laying in a hospital bed, too?” Y/N said, shaking her head. “I’m glad you stayed away. You shouldn’t have to deal with this Ghostface shit your whole life.” Y/N told her.

“How’s your mom? Can she have visitors?” Sidney asked her not to argue with her since that’s the least thing she wanted to do seeing the state Y/N is in. Sidney can read Y/N like a book, and she knew Y/N was feeling the same thing she was feeling after her second round of Ghostface. “Yeah, follow me.” Y/N answered her and walked away with Sidney following close behind her. Y/N led Sidney to the room her mom was in. When they walked inside the room, Gale was sitting up in the bed and Sam was by her bedside. “There’s my little girl!” Gale said in relief she was so happy to see Y/N is okay and is standing in the same room as her. When Sam told her what happened she wanted to get out of bed to go see her. But surprisingly Sam was able to keep her there. Y/N walked over to her mom and gave her a long-waited hug. As the mother and daughter reunited Sam and Sidney shared a hug.

After Y/N pulled away she stepped to the side so Sidney and Gale could share a hug. “Sid, what are you doing here?” Gale asked after they let go of each other. She told Sidney not to come because she told her the same thing Y/N told her earlier. “I gave her a call to catch her up on everything that had happened.” Sam told her as she stood with Y/N. “I had to come and make sure that everyone is alright.” Sidney told Gale. “Where’s Mark and the kids?” Gale asked her in a curious tone. “They are home. I told Mark I didn’t want the kids sitting in a hospital.” Sidney answered her. “How are you feeling?” She asked Gale. “Very high on pain meds but other than that, I feel good.” Gale answered with a giggle which also made Sidney giggle as well. “I’m so relieved that everyone is alright.” Sidney said which made Y/N break down crying. She didn’t realize how long she had been keeping her tears in till now.

“Y/N, what’s wrong?” Sidney asked her with worry and panicking a little bit. “Ethan!” Y/N cried out. His name was the only thing that could come out of her mouth. Sam gave her a hug just like she did last night. As Y/N cried onto Sam’s shoulder Sidney rubbed her back in comfort. Gale wished there was something she could do since she hadn’t seen her daughter this upset since her dad’s murder. “Y/N! Y/N!” Two voices called out to her. When Y/N let go of Sam she saw Tara and Chad standing in the doorway catching their breaths. “Woah, what’s going on?” Sam asked them. “Ethan.” Chad said still trying to catch his breath. “He’s awake.” Tara said looking at Y/N with a small smile appearing on her lips. “W-what?” Y/N said in a stutter since her body went into full shock. “He told us that he wants to see you.” Chad told her finally catching his breath.

Y/N gave them a nod as she let go of Sam and followed Chad and Tara to the room Ethan was in. Y/N saw Mindy standing in the hallway with her waist all wrapped up. She had a smile on her face. “Go get him, tiger.” Mindy said giving Y/N a wink. Y/N took a deep breath to calm her racing nerves and stepped into the hospital room. She saw Ethan lying in the bed looking alive. Some color came back to his face. When his brown eyes met hers, a whole weight was lifted off her shoulders. She saw the color back into his bright eyes that were full of darkness. “Hey beautiful.” Ethan said as his lips curved into a weak smile.

Y/N quickly walked to his bedside and connected her lips with his. Both of them put everything they felt into the kiss. Y/N didn’t think that she would ever feel his soft lips on top of hers. When they pulled away, they were gasping for air, especially Ethan. “You have no idea how happy I am to see you. To see your memorizing eyes open.” Y/N told him as happy tears streamed down her face. “Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere.” Ethan reassured her as he put one of his hands onto her cheek to wipe away her tears. He brought her back down to connect their lips again. Even though the kiss was short it still had just as much passion as the last kiss had.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.” Ethan apologized for not telling her his real last name. “I’m sorry for not believing you when your fucked up family tried to turn me against you.” Y/N said apologizing as well. “Don’t be sorry about that. They are gone. They can’t hurt anyone anymore.” Ethan reassured her as he lightly stroked her cheek. She leaned into his warm touch that still made her feel safe. She still felt secured by his touch.

“I love you.” Ethan told her, which made her heart flutter. “I love you, too.” Y/N told him and connected her lips with his for the third time.

 ~~~~~~~~~~

           Some weeks have passed, and everything has been the way it was before Y/N’s second Ghostface massacre happened. Y/N finally feels like the girl she was before her dad died. She and Ethan are officially together and always by each other’s side of course when they aren’t in class. Ethan was scared to tell the group the truth about his real name and family, but Y/N reassured him that they would except him and of course, she was right. He told them everything, he had only told Y/N like how terribly his dad treated him and always chose Ritchie and Quinn over him. Everyone gave him so much credit for losing contact with his dad after turning eighteen.

Ethan was so relieved that everyone still wanted him around after what his psychotic family put them through. Ethan isn’t going to lie, he’s a bit afraid he’ll feel that same darkness his family got pulled into, but Sam told him he’s a good person and he will stay on the good side just like she has. She tells him that they are both nothing like their evil family members.

Y/N and her mom are not just on good terms, they are on great terms just like Sam and Tara are. Gale has really become the mom she always wanted to be. She thanks Sidney a lot for helping her and Y/N bond again. Sidney stepped into Dewey’s role and helped Y/N and Gale stay together.

Y/N was currently at the art show in a big auditorium on the college campus. Seeing that shrine really inspired her to make something that keeps her father and her Aunt Tatum remember a whole lot better. She sculpted their faces out of clay with a name tag of their whole name on the bottom. Y/N sat next to her beautiful artwork as people walked around the room. Her eyes lit up when her Y/E/C eyes met a pair of brown ones. She jumped out of her seat and wrapped her arms around him, laying her head on his chest.

“I’m guessing you missed me?” Ethan said as he let out a laugh returning the hug. “Anytime I’m not with you, I’m missing you.” Y/N said to him leaning up and give him a sweet kiss on the lips which he returned. “Geez Y/N, when did you get so cheesy?” Mindy said walking up to the couple with Chad, Tara, and Sam. Tara and Chad had their hands linked together since Y/N helped them confess their feelings for one anther and now they are a couple. “Leave her alone, Mindy!” Chad told his twin sister in a stern tone giving her a small punch to her shoulder. “Yeah, she’s happy and in love.” Tara said looking at Y/N and Ethan in awe. Ethan smiled and gave Y/N a light kiss on the top of her head which always makes the butterflies in her stomach go crazy. Yep, that feeling is never going to go away which Y/N doesn’t mind one bit.

“Wow, Y/N! This is amazing.” Sam said looking at her artwork in amazement. “Thanks! It was a pain in the ass to make but it was worth it.” Y/N said making everyone laugh. “Also, this one really helped me get it down as well.” She added, looking up at Ethan who gave her another kiss to the lips. “Hey guys.” Sidney said walking up to the group with Gale by her side. Everyone was surprised to see Sidney since Gale wanted to surprise Y/N with her. “Oh my gosh!” Y/N said in a surprised tone letting go of Ethan to give her a big hug. “You know I couldn’t miss this.” Sidney said to her, returning the hug. “I tried to get Kirby to come but she’s stuck on a case in Atlanta, but she sends her love.” Gale told her after Y/N let go of Sidney to give her daughter a quick hug. “I’ll have to give her a call, later.” Y/N said letting go of her mom. “Can we see it?” Sidney asked Y/N referring to her artwork. The whole group was blocking their view of the sculptures. She kept what she was making a secret from Sidney and Gale since she wanted it to be a surprise.

Everyone moved to the side so Gale and Sidney could see the sculptures which brought tears to both of the women’s eyes. “Wow!” Sidney said, looking between the sculptures in awe.  “Oh, sweetie! These are beautiful!” Gale said wrapping an arm around Y/N and rubbing it lightly. “Thank you, I feel like this is a better tribute to dad and Aunt Tatum than that stupid shrine.” Y/N said as she wrapped her arm around her mom’s back rubbing it as well. She knew her dad and Aunt Tatum were smiling down at her. She knew they were proud of her, and she knew she was going to continue to make them proud. Live out the life she knew her dad wanted her to live.

As the night went on everyone mingled around checking out more artwork. Y/N got a lot of compliments on her artwork and told them the story behind it which she was finally okay with telling. When her dad first got killed, she hid from her family’s history with Ghostface because she was ashamed to be a part of that history but as the days pasted, she embraced it instead of running from the truth. Sidney actually helped her with that since she knew that same feeling.

After the event was over the group decided to go out somewhere to grab dinner together. As they walked down the busy New York sidewalk Y/N took Ethan’s hand and gave it a light squeeze. “Are you okay?” Ethan asked her in a soft tone looking over at her. “I’m great!” Y/N told him and gave him a kiss on the cheek which made his cheeks turn a light red like they always did when she would kiss him.

For the first time in a year, she can answer that question with the truth and not a lie.

*Tags* 

@sweetirilly  @aqellano  @igotmajordaddyissues  @athenalive  @hotweeb  @ghostlyboiii  @marshallowy  @callsignwidow  @rolly-polly-molly

(IF YOUR NAME IF CROSSED OUT IT IS BECAUSE TUMBLR WOULDN’T LET ME TAG YOU, SORRY!)

[kaisacobra]

I just read Second Best and I've never been punched in the heart by a fic like that.

Like, I'm losing my mind over what you've written and had to read all of the asks since it came out.

I definitely think Tara doesn't deserve R after everything she's said and done, you can't keep hurting someone and expect that love will be enough to patch all wounds. You said that Tara had some reasoning (maybe not justified but still) as to why she treats R that way and also I understand that everyone grieves differently.

I'd like to understand Tara on this, because it seems despite everything that happened she did love Amber and it might be hard for her to reconcile both Amber as her girlfriend and Amber as one of her attempted killers and THEN having to shoot her and ofc being threatened by people who seem close to you has got to fuck you up irreparably, like she definitely needs help and maybe having THAT conversation in the middle of a volatile environment such as a party full of alcohol and high emotions was an awful idea and R was right in trying to stop Sam and Tara, still, Tara's lashing out seems to me like just that, her lashing out because she may have started feeling crowded on and Sam reminded of how fucked up she might actually be and THEN bringing Reader into the argument finally (and unfortunately) gave Tara an outlet for all of her conflicting emotions. She has the perfect target, she knows Reader's weaknesses, she knows how to frame her words and most importantly she knows that R won't actually fight back. She just wanted to inflict damage somehow and she got it, she just didn't have the wherewithal to hold back on her words, and now she's left with the consequences of the damage she caused.

I'm not trying to make excuses for Tara, what she said was definitely fucked up and she may seem undeserving of happiness to some, but I wanted to understand the reasoning behind it, because in the end she is just a girl who needs help but refuses to see it and lashes out when confronted. And if she were to get a happy ending, I think the best way to go about it would be to work on herself first and start fixing what she broke.

Anyways. As for Reader I am so excited as to the realm of possibilities of moving on mean, especially now that they are in NY. Bringing in Quinn for Reader just so the Gang still has a connection to R despite the shit show that went down AND to drive the knife further (literally) on how fucked Tara was and watching R falling for Quinn's charms (platonically or romantically) just for Quinn to end up harming them to get TO TARA, maybe Quinn senses how R means more to Tara than she likes to admit. R being attacked and feeling more vulnerable than ever is ofc going to make her close up even MORE when Tara tries to make amends because, hasn't Reader been through enough, R is going to be guarded and hesitant around Tara, not so much cold because despite everything you can't make a love like that go away that easily, so R may be civil and even friendly with Tara but definitely won't be getting close enough to give Tara the power to hurt R again.

As for the Kate Route, I can definitely see it happening, R is out in NY and ofc is looking at safety measures to implement, they somehow meet through Bishop Security and that's that, R has now a Golden Retriver friend (who has a Golden Retriever!) that somehow became R's loyal bestfriend. R definitely takes a quick liking to Kate too, since Kate tends to be funny and protective (kinda reminds R of Tara too) and she is so outspoken and confident that R can't help but keep her as a friend, a breath of fresh air after walking on eggshells with Tara because of R's feelings. And of course, Kate seems like someone who falls fast and hard, and isn't afraid to show it, so even if R can't feel the same at the moment Kate understands and respects that, even offering some comfort after finding out everything that went down with Tara and R. Kate being excited to meet the 'core four' and everyone can't help but fall for Kate's charming personality, they see her being hopeful and daydreaming as the perfect contrast to Reader's 'down-to-earthness' and are relieved that R has someone in the group who can finally choose Reader FIRST, since Sam is Tara's sister and the twins are hesitant to take sides (even though Mindy thinks R is almost always right). Kate being fast friends with Chad over sports and becoming gym buddies (love the hc of Chad spilling the tea to Kate over some reps), Mindy likes that Kate is loyal and keeps R happy and although Sam is distrustful and paranoid at first she eventually warms up to Kate after finding out that Kate lost her father and has a shitty mother (Sam can relate) and the favors from Bishop Security to the Carpenter's definitely help too.

If following the events of the movie I can definitely see Kate trying to sus out the killer and ALMOST getting it right, her going into protective mode so fast and losing her mind when R keeps risking it all for the sake of Tara, she gets it since she fell for R but can't help but worry if there's something else to it and maybe she didn't notice how devastated R really was after Tara.

Tara WANTS to hate Kate, and she definitely gets close to it when seeing how affectionate Kate is (Kate definitely is into platonic PDA and can't help herself, specially since R doesn't seem to mind) (it's nice to feel wanted for once) and how receptive everyone is to Kate's go-lucky attitude and neverending gifts. Like Sam, she definitely isn't trusting Kate from the get-go and all the gifts Kate brings the gang aren't helping, but even from the beginning nobody takes Tara seriously because they can clearly see that it all stems from jealousy of not having Reader's attention to herself for the first time. And even though they try to ease Kate into their dynamic as to not upset Tara further it doesn't work because Tara doesn't even realize why she doesn't like Kate fully! They both seem like they could be great friends! Why is it though when she sees Kate and R she gets so mad?

Kate definitely knows what's going on and can't help but be cocky about it to which the gang just gets more exasperated with the added antics of Kate (who is in love with R but respects R's feelings, but loves to make Tara jealous) Tara (who is jealous, doesn't know why and thinks R and Kate are together) and Reader (who is oblivious to all of this and is nursing a broken heart while still in the same friend group as Tara), while also dodging a murderer, yay!

Honestly however it ends up, Reader with or without Tara, adding someone to stir the pot like Kate or Quinn? For a moment? Maybe?

We can all agree that Reader definitely needs a moment to heal and survive what's coming.

Also

"...because you promised her you wouldn't leave her alone and she just doesn't wanna believe that death is the one thing that's gonna break you apart".

That line hits so hard how DARE you

...aand i know I'm late since you are already writing the 2nd part but I still wanted to share my thoughts.

Awesome writing and I'm so invested! Can't wait!

You see, this is precisely why part 2 is getting so long🤭 I want you guys to understand Tara and why she's doing the things that way and i want it to make sense ever since the beginning. I don't believe people are born mean and i wanna transfer that into the story. Tara wasn't born mean and i want y'all to see why she's like that.

Now, am i saying this is gonna wipe every damage Tara has made to R and make her a victim? Absolutely not. But at the end of the day, she's just a girl with issues that needs to get help before trying to make up and be in good terms with R again.

Kate would definitely integrate herself so well within the core four and that would make Tara go ballistic. Not only does she has to deal with Ms. Perfect stealing her place as R's number one person but now she's winning over her friends as well? Tara would be pissed and always on the verge of throwing a fit whenever Kate's around.

And Kate is a little shit, let's be fr here. This girl is a rich heir with no siblings, she never had to share a thing all her life and you expect her to just be cool about this random gnome trying fight her over R? Nuh uh. She's doing things to piss Tara off on purpose (and sometimes she even asks you for permission before doing it, just to make sure she's not creating an awkward vibe)

Don't worry, you're not late for anything! I loved your thoughts and i had so much fun reading them. I hope you'll like what i have planned for part 2 🥰

[borntoocry]

𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬

college Ellie AU

part 1/? (long chapter i think)

summary: Val has finally escaped her close-minded town and has gone to college in Boston. No one knows her, and she’s happy about it. She’s gay and golden but... she has no friends. That is until she meets a girl in her college algebra class. 

pairing: Ellie williams x fem!latina oc

warnings: no warnings? I don’t think. 

listen to better distractions by faye webster

My roommate was rarely in our room. She was somewhere else, with the boyfriend she said she had. I’d never seen him, he was a pure ghost. Sam, my roommate, only spoke about him when she was in the room, but I never paid attention. She was quite rude, so I would plug in my earphones and do my homework as she whined ‘babe, babe, come pick me up!’ 

I was alone my days leading up to the first day of classes. I wouldn’t walk out of my dorm unless I was starving and didn’t want to touch the food my parents left me, or to sit outside and read my book as I watched more students move in. No one looked at me in my colorful patch-work cardigan and mismatched Christmas socks, which I enjoyed more than some should. I was glad no one was paying attention to every single thing I did: walked, read books, listened to music, wore the clothes I wanted to wear. I would sit outside until drunks started walking about like zombies. 

I probably should’ve gone to parties, but Sam and I weren’t close, so even if I asked about parties, I didn’t want to be the only girl wandering around alone. At least not yet. I wanted to get a good feel of everyone before I partied by myself. That’s why today I was going  extra early to every single one of my classes. I was going to sit in the back of the class and watch everyone file into class, choosing their undesignated-designated seats for the rest of the semester. I was told not to do that by my mom, because it was weird and ‘stalker-ish,’ but I didn’t care. If someone looked nice and helpful in my useless classes, I would attach myself to them and form a bond I couldn’t form with my roommate. 

My first class was College Algebra 1304. I didn’t need this course as I had already taken it in high school. I was well-past the credits for high school but leaving early meant desperately trying to navigate through life when everyone was still depending on their parents. I should have taken the opportunity to escape, but I didn’t. Like a dumbass. 

I looked at myself in the mirror one last time: dark-washed dad shorts, a tight lavender long-sleeve and tennis shoes. I looked bright, like the moon in the middle of a clear black sky. I was tanner than usual after being out in the sun all summer, and my cheeks were rosy from being splattered with blush. My hair was in its usual curly nest down my back, and I covered myself in gold jewelry my mom brought me from her last Mexico visit. I was finally pretty. I was golden, after being so gray for so long. 

I looked happy. 

I tucked my hair back to show my golden hoops and backed away from my mirror. I was going to be late if I kept staring at myself, so I quickly pulled on my backpack and grabbed my water bottle off my mini-fridge. I ran out of the door and walked across campus to the Math building. The place where every guy thought they were smarter than all of the girls. Even the ugly nerdy guys thought they were better than the pretty girls finding their classes. 

I thought it was funny: some of the guys looking at the girls with humor as if they weren’t going to have to find their class at some point. It was also painfully obvious—the freshman boys. They only gawked, never moved forward. The sophomore guys looked like they didn’t care, unless someone walked in front of them and ruined their concentration. 

I easily found my class amidst everyone. I was late to my ‘extremely-early’ plan, as there was someone already sitting at the front of the class. But they were irrelevant in my eyes. They was a he and he was dressed in a blue polo and khaki shorts. It made me laugh, but it also had me in awe. I’d never seen a guy like that—all asshole-y and funny looking. 

I took a seat in the back of the class, like I said. I took out my pen and journal and placed my water bottle at the edge of my desk. I opened my journal to the first page and wrote ‘MATH 1304; Table of Contents: Page 1- THOUGHTS ON PEERS.’ 

Page 1 started with the name ‘Khaki Asshole Dude,’ followed with, ‘He looks like he doesn’t think a girl can be funny.’ 

I continued writing descriptions of my peers followed by my thoughts on them as they came in. People sat where they pleased, but no one sat close to me. It was either they thought I was weird, or they wanted to be alone the first day of class. Understandable, but I needed a friend. 

Attendance began dying down as the time passed, but right before the professor closed the door, a cool, jaw-dropping, panty-dropping girl walked in. She quietly apologized to the professor and looked around the room. I didn’t want to stare at her, but I couldn’t not look at her. There was a tattoo running down her forearm and a couple of bracelets hugging her wrists. She was wearing all black: black tank top, unbuttoned black button-up, black jeans, and black Converse. Her auburn hair was short, way above her shoulders, and pulled behind her ears.  

I needed to stop staring. 

But by the time I decided to, her eyes landed on me. She smiled. A small smile no one but I could tell. Her eyes softened when she looked at me but she wouldn’t move. She just silently stood there, as if she was waiting for me to wave her over to the seat beside me. 

“Miss, please take a seat, we’ll be beginning soon,” the professor said, and that’s when she stuck out a foot in front of her other. 

She mouthed, Is the seat open? 

I looked to my right and left and internally stabbed my hand with my pen. Of course both seats beside me were open, I had absolutely no one to wait for and no one even sat beside me before she got here. 

I turned back to her and nodded. 

She quickly took the spot to my right and dropped her backpack onto the floor. “I’m late,” she whispered. 

I chuckled and shook my head. “Almost,” I replied. “Almost late.” 

There was a short silence that grew between us where she pulled out her pen and journal and opened it up to the first page. The professor had begun speaking, but it was nothing important. It was only syllabus day, which was useless. I read the entire thing about ten times, so everything was stuck in my head already. 

“When did you come in?,” she asked me. 

I ran a hand over my mouth to try and hide my smile… and my heart that was trying to leap out. I was speaking to the most attractive woman I had ever met and I wasn’t even visibly dying. I was internally, but I was pulling myself together. 

“Errr… I came in a good fifteen minutes before class started.” 

“Fifteen?,” she quietly shouted. 

I nodded. “I was going to feel everyone out. See what they were like.” 

“Ah,” she rasped. “A try-hard then?” 

I dropped my head to feel the nape of my neck and smiled. “You could say that.” 

She continued looking at me; feeling me up, as I put it. This is when I began worrying about how I looked, what she thought of me, if I lived up to any gay dream she might have been having. I was stressing at how great of a first impression I was setting. Even though I shouldn’t have cared, I was caring nevertheless. I was a new person but I couldn’t let go of every single trait that built the character I was now. 

I patted down my hair and pulled it back behind my ears; I checked to see if my earrings were still intact, and if my sparkly jewelry that caressed my cartilage was shown. I wanted to know if she could see the dainty sun tattoo behind my ear that had no meaning at all besides it looking pretty. 

She averted her flirtatious gaze towards her journal and began writing down dates and important assignments we had due soon. The professor jumped onto paired study sessions and assignments where we could choose our partner. That’s when she looked at me once again and raised an eyebrow. 

The pen spinning on her finger was one of my main focuses. She kept twirling it and twirling it, as if she knew I was paying attention to not only all of her, but her hands in particular. It wasn’t my fault, though. There were veins flooding throughout her arms, up to her wrists where thin individual veins ran towards her knuckles. They were bolder as she dropped her pen and pumped her hand. My eyes were strictly on those goddamned fingers that I forgot she was speaking to me. 

“You think you’d want to partner up?,” she asked, and I knew she was repeating herself. 

“I’m sorry, I wasn’t—my mind was somewhere else,” I scoffed. She shook her head and motioned for me to continue. “Yes, we can be partners. I’d like that, thanks.” 

“Do you hate algebra?,” she questioned. 

I shrugged. 

She raised her left eyebrow this time. “You’re smart and pretty, eh?” 

I chuckled. “I’ve taken this class already,” I whispered through a smile. “Not specifically this class, but College Algebra 1304, yes.” 

“Then why are you taking it again?” 

“Credits didn’t transfer.” 

“Bummer.” 

“Yup,” I said with an eye-roll. 

“So, class. I’ll see you Wednesday. If you have any questions, feel free to email me. Use your college email, though, I’ve had too many ‘ChrisEvansluvr3000’s’ email me. And if you do, make sure to put your name, class, and class time on the subject. It’s—“ 

“So,” the girl said, slowly grabbing her backpack, “are you doing anything tonight?” 

I hummed for a second, acting as though I was scrolling through my calendar. “No. It is a Monday though…” 

She scoffed. “So?” She stood up and slipped her backpack onto one shoulder. Her distinct smell of musky vanilla and weed flooded into my nostrils. How I hadn’t caught her scent when she sat down was beyond me—but now that I could, I was falling deeper into this unknown girls trap. 

I opened my mouth to say why—school, syllabus week might come with a syllabus test—no, it would—and I had to get a good nights rest—but I let it hang open until I thought about what I told myself before going to college. I had to let go of any closeted habits I had from high school. Not the gay closeted habits, but the closeted habits where I stayed inside all day and all night, even if some rich kid living in the lakes was throwing a party. I had to get rid of them—dump them in the trash and push the bin down a hill. I had to become a different person, which started with going to a party. 

“I’m sorry, I used to live in a really shitty small town full of homophobic boring people so I’m not used to doing anything fun. Even during the week.” 

“It’s okay…” 

“Oh shit, I forgot to tell you my name. It’s Valeria, but you can call me Val.” 

“Okay well, Valeria, there’s a party tonight at my friend Kahlo’s place. He’s older.” 

“Ooooh,” I laugh. “Where is it?” 

“The Clark 2056 apartments. On Clark. Here, let me give you my number so you can text me and if you want, we can go together. Or if you want, you and your roommate can go.” 

I nodded and she sat back down. She grabbed my journal and in the corner of page one, where I wrote my opinion on everyone, she wrote her name and phone number. 

Ellie Williams: 817-008-####

She slid my pen and journal back towards me and began to stand up. But I quickly shot my hand out and grabbed her wrist, pulling her back towards me. I grabbed my pen and turned her wrist over, writing my name and number on the inside of her arm. 

“Incase you end up forgetting who I am or something,” I whisper, even though the majority of the class is gone and we don’t have to whisper anymore. 

I looked up at her as she began looking at me. “I won’t. Wouldn’t, ever.” 

“Okay,” I replied with a soft smile. “I’ll text you after my next class… Ellie. And I’ll see you tonight.” 

“You’re going?” 

“It’s my first ever party, of course.” 

“Okay then,” she says eagerly as she stands up. “I’ll see you then, Valeria.” 

chapter 2 / Chapter 3

[alovelyfox]

Chapter 7: Caught

The next couple seconds seem to stretch on for multiple lifetimes. Y/N remains looking shell shocked at Kyle while he tries to remain as nonchalant as possible, ignoring the blaring alarms going off in his head. Her eyes survey his body, taking in his distorted face and bloody appearance.

“Oh my god, Kyle.”

She then rushes out of his office, and Kyle runs after her into the kitchen, thinking of every possible way to justify how he looks.

“Y/N, wait. I can explain everything. Just let me-”

She puts a finger to his lips and he stops talking, his brain turning blank at the sudden contact

“No, let me,” she says, pointing towards her desk. “Go sit down.”

He hesitates, and she looks at him with pleading eyes.

“Please Kyle.”

He nods and takes a seat on her chair, while she assembles something he can’t see. She comes back a moment later with an hastily mustered ice pack, which she dumps into his open hands and then walks back to his office. Returning with a clean white shirt, she takes the ice away and looks him up and down.

“Take your shirt off.”

Her sudden bluntness stuns Kyle, and she turns away upon realizing.

“Sorry, I meant take your shirt off so I can assess the damage,” she elaborates, her voice suddenly quite shy. Once he confirms it’s off, she turns back around and inspects his body. He watches her intently while she does, but her face only exhibits concentration. She sighs once she’s done, and tells him to put the new shirt on.

“Looks like they didn’t do much to your body. The main issue is your face, but we can get that patched up in no time,” she says, handing him the ice pack to put over his black eye before walking back to the kitchen. She comes back with some gauze and a cold, damp cloth, which she lightly presses on the area around Kyle’s lip. She’s way too close to his face for his liking, so to avoid eye contact he glances at the clock, which reads 10:15 pm.

“Wait, why are you here in the first place? It’s quarter past 10, everyone else would’ve left hours ago.”

“Oh yeah. Well, it’s kinda embarrassing, but I thought you might not have left yet, and I wanted to see you. Good thing too, otherwise no one would have been here to help you after getting mugged.”

Wait, mugged? Kyle thinks, then he smiles as he realizes why she must assume that.

“How do you know the blood on me is mine?” He asks with a playful tone, and she smirks.

“I don’t think I could imagine you purposefully hurting anyone, ever,” she replies, and his heart skips a beat.

I was standing in front of her covered in blood, yet she still refused to believe that it was my fault. Imagine what she’d say if she knew the truth. He shook that thought out of his mind.

“Why do you think that?” He questions, and she shrugs.

“You’re normally so calm, and you always keep your emotions in check, unlike me.”

She turns somber, probably remembering how she cried on his shoulder that evening after the trial.

“Hey, don’t worry about the case. You’re gonna make a great lawyer. I mean, you care so much about everyone around you, and always see the best in people no matter what they do.”

Embarrassed, she shyly tries to turn away but he stands and tilts her chin back up so she’s forced to look at him.

“You’re lovable, and charming without even trying. And you’re so beautiful…”

His voice trails off after the last word, and her breath hitches as they look into each other’s eyes. She again tries to avert her gaze down to the floor but he snakes a hand to the back of her neck, and leans in so close he can feel the warmth emanating from the inside of her mouth through her slightly parted lips. His own are tingling with anticipation and they’re about to make contact with hers when the door bangs open, startling Kyle so much he jumps 10 feet away from her.

“Y/N? And Kyle? What are you two doing here?” Sam’s voice penetrates through the empty room, instantly killing whatever mood was just in the air. Kyle turns away to hide his blush while Y/N answers him.

“Oh Sam, it’s just you. Kyle got mugged, so I’m patching him back up.”

“Kyle got mugged? Is he alright?” Sam asks as he hurries over and starts examining Kyle’s bruised eye.

“I’m fine,” he says, pushing Sam’s intruding hands away from his face. “What are you doing here?”

Sam looks around sheepishly before replying.

“I quit.”

“What?” Y/N asks bewildered, while Kyle tilts his head in confusion.

“Yeah, all the management changes going on also means budget cuts, so I got told that I can keep my job, but at a lower salary. And I don’t know, I joined this firm years ago because I needed work straight out of college, and I think if I don’t get out now I’ll be stuck here for the rest of my life. So I quit, and it feels so liberating knowing that I have so much ahead of me, and that I’m free to follow my dreams.”

Y/N moves to hug him, while Kyle awkwardly pats him on the back. He had known Sam for a while now, but had kept him at arm’s length like he did everyone else. Everyone until Y/N entered his life.

“Anyways,” Sam continues after she lets him go. “They called me an hour ago and apparently already found a replacement, some guy called Leopold. He’s starting in a couple days, so they want me to take all my personal belongings out of my desk, which is what I came here to do.”

“Oh, well I’m pretty much done with Kyle over here, so we can help! Right Kyle?”

He nods, and they head over to the receptionist desk. They pack all Sam’s things away into cardboard storage boxes, and he complains at how fast the company replaced him, while Y/N reassures him that it’s a sign that he did the right thing by quitting. The name of his replacement sounds familiar to Kyle, but his brain is still buzzing from the almost-kiss and he can’t concentrate on where he knows it from. In fact, he can’t concentrate on anything other than Y/N, and keeps stealing glances at her while they load the stuff into Sam’s car. She however, is firmly avoiding eye contact, and when Sam offers to drop her home she jumps at the chance.

She gives Kyle a tight smile before telling him to go home and heal up, then practically sprints into the passenger's seat of Sam’s car. He drives them off, leaving Kyle standing all alone, wondering what he did to make her go from nearly kissing him to not even wishing him goodnight.

…

The bruise on Kyle’s face along with his split lip healed nicely overnight, but every time Y/N averts her eyes from his the next day at work, he swears the pain comes back. She’s carefully seated at her desk the entire day, not looking up from her paperwork at all. Not when Kyle walks over to wish her good morning, or when he asks her whether she got home safely last night, or when he offers to bring her some coffee. It’s like he’s ceased to exist in her eyes. After many failed attempts to get her attention, he solemnly walks back to his office, working there quietly until 6 pm, when Sam pops his head in.

“Hey Kyle, since it’s pretty much my last day, a couple of us were gonna go down to the bar and grab some drinks. You wanna come?”

Normally Kyle would refuse an invitation to hang outside of work like this, but he figures this would be the perfect time to confront Y/N about what was wrong, so he grabs his coat and walks out with Sam. Y/N is still working peacefully at her desk, and upon seeing Sam she gets up, but a glimpse of Kyle behind his shoulder gives her pause. Sam walks into the elevator and she rushes to follow him in, but Kyle grabs ahold of her wrist to pull her back.

“Hey Sam, you go into this one. We’ll come in the next.” Sam looks slightly confused, but shrugs and closes the doors, leaving the two of them alone.

Kyle loosens his grip and Y/N slides her wrist out of his hand, then waits patiently for the elevator to come back up again, refusing to look at him.

“Y/N, please,” he pleads, but when the doors open she steps in and presses the ground floor without so much as a glance at him. He gets in beside her and the doors shut behind him. His eyes unconsciously look over at her but she suddenly finds much interest in the elevator buttons, which is where she keeps her gaze set.

Fine, if that’s how she wants to play this.

Kyle presses the emergency stop button and moves to face her, closing the gap between them and pressing her back to the elevator wall.

“Look, I know you’re probably mad at me for what happened yesterday, but what we’re not gonna do is playing this fucking silent treatment game. If you have a problem, you tell me right now, and I’m not letting you out of here until you do.”

Her body shifts uncomfortably from being in such close proximity to his, but she keeps her eyes firmly on him as she replies.

“I’m not mad. But to be honest, what you’re doing right now is giving me a reason to be.”

Kyle steps back from her and she returns to where she was standing, letting out a heavy sigh. She presses the emergency button again and the elevator starts moving again. She glances at him, and he’s about to utter an apology for his abrasive behavior when she cuts him off.

“If you want to know why I’m acting weird, at least get a couple drinks in me first,” she says grinning, and Kyle smirks. The doors open and she steps out into what he’s sure is gonna be an interesting night.

…

Sam and the others cleared out a couple hours ago, so when the clock strikes 11 pm, only Kyle and Y/N are left sitting at the bar. Empty shot glasses with dribbles of various alcohol lay in front of them, and Y/N’s sipping a craft beer while Kyle rests his head on the bartop. His mind is hazy and his thoughts unclear, as opposed to how they were when he entered.

His sole purpose was to have one drink with Y/N and get her to spill her guts, but her natural charm made him forget what he came to do. Their conversation topics ranged from how nice it’s been to have the sun out recently to whether or not Kanye would actually make a good president, and all the while the liquor kept flowing. Kyle was never a big drinker, so after a couple shots he practically collapsed on the bar, as Y/N just laughed. He now turns his head to look at her, watching as she sets her beer down and faces him.

“What’s wrong Y/N? You can tell me anything, you know?” he says, slightly slurring his words. She looks him up and down before taking a swig of her drink and sighing.

“I think losing the case yesterday has made me depressed,” she replies. “I mean, I did everything right, yet it still wasn’t enough. That’s why I didn’t want to see you today. I thought you’d be… disappointed.”

Kyle can’t imagine a world where Y/N could ever disappoint him. He found it stupid of her to think that, even for a second.

“It’s also why I haven’t texted Gemma back,” she continues. “I can’t face her knowing that she has to go back to working under that horrible man because of my failure.”

“Oh, she’s not going back to work for him. I took care of that. I took care of him.”

Y/N gives him a confused look, but his tipsy state won’t let him stop talking.

“I didn’t want that guy to be here, so I made sure you never had to see him again. I killed him”

“What, like physically?” She asks, perplexed.

“Physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually. You name it, and he’s dead. Chopped him up into some pieces and tossed him into the underworld,” he says, and she chuckles in response, so he elaborates.

“I’m kind of like the modern day Hades, you know?”

“Oh really, how so?” She teases, and he spends the next couple minutes talking about all the similarities the Greek king of the underworld and him share. She listens along with a smile, but when she gets a text from her phone it quickly disappears. Even in his drunken state he figures something must be up, so he asks her what’s wrong.

“Oh, it’s just Stan,” she says apathetically, texting him back before setting her phone face down on the table. “I helped him get a job recently so he wants to meet again to see me.”

“What, like on a date?” Kyle questions, suddenly sitting upright.

“No silly, I already told you we’re not dating.”

“Okay. Good. I don’t like the thought of you two… dating.”

“Oh yeah?” she asks playfully. “Why not, you feeling jealous?”

“Yeah. The only one you should be dating is me,” he says, and Y/N tries to laugh it off, but he stares straight at her and she stops. She’s looking at him with those damn teasing eyes of hers, and his heartbeat skips just like it did at the office yesterday. He feels like he can’t breathe, and he needs her mouth to provide him with the oxygen he so desperately craves. Leaning forward, he prepares to join their lips together and finish what he couldn’t last night, but his intoxicated brain’s misjudges where her face would be, missing her mouth completely and causing him to fall off his chair, kissing the floor instead of her.

Y/N immediately rushes to help him, but upon realizing that he’s alright, she can’t help but giggle at what just happened. She slings his arm around her shoulder so that she can walk them out of the bar, and the refreshing summer’s night air slaps Kyle across the face. It feels good, but unfortunately doesn’t help his wasted mind, so all he can do is garble an incoherent sentence when she gets him into his car and asks for the address. She sighs, and her getting into the driver's seat is the last thing he can remember until he awakes to the sound of her yelling.

…

His arm is still slung over her shoulder, and when his eyes open he immediately recognizes that they’re at her apartment. What he doesn’t immediately recognize are the people inside, and it takes him a couple moments of rapid blinking and squinting to perceive the scene in front of him. Stan is naked on the couch, and who looks like a more naked version of Wendy Testaberger from his hometown of South Park is under him. They’re both covered in sweat, and it doesn’t take a genius to figure out what they were/are in the process of doing. And that’s when Y/N’s yelling starts to make sense.

“WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE?”