#everybody know im a mf monster

[smolgirlbiglungs]

my presence is a present kiss my ass

[bitchimasnake-sss]

"my girlfriend's a nerd" ft. the monster trio!

self explanatory self-indulgent drabbles to soothe my book!loving ass

ft. luffy, zoro and sanji x fem! reader set-up: you like books, he likes you that's it warnings: none lmao this is very sfw. one might call it wholesome even. m.list

luffy:

thats my baby ^^

— im not even sure if this mf can read 😭😭

— honestly 9/10 chance he can't but when has that ever stopped him from being our most supportive himbo king

— go king give us everything!!

— he doesn't get why you read books when instead you can be like sleeping or eating or looking at the sea but well, he doesn't question it

— he just thinks it's a weird hobby you have (i don't think he's aware of how freakishly illiterate he is)

— but just cause he thinks it's weird that doesn't mean he wouldn't hug you half-asleep when he hears you sobbing into the dead of the night or he wouldn't listen with keen interest when you explain the plot of your favourite book as he wraps his arms around you and hums into your hair

— will 100% offer to fight the author/ tear up the book everytime he sees you having a breakdown over a particular scene/character

"who should I kill?!" the deadpan seriousness in his voice is what terrifies you

"nobody! I'm okay–"

— after you explain to him that hurting somebody is not necessary and you're fine, he will try to coddle you with extended hugs and food (lots and lots and lots of food).

"yn you should eat something! should I get you something to eat??" you can hear the panic in this poor boys voice 😭😭

"no luffy, its okay. im fine!" you say through sniffs and snorts, eyes bloodshot from crying over ink on paper

"brb" and he gets you dinner enough for 5 people because that's how he knows to comfort you (willingly took sanjis kicks and namis punches to accomplish this mission)

— since he's a clingy little child, he will hold onto you some way or the other when you're reading

— you're reading in your room while he's fast asleep? his arm is draped across your waist lazily. you're on the other side of the deck, sunbathing and reading? his hand is stretched out from where he's sitting and on your thigh (ussop tripped thrice over his hand, rip god ussop 🙏) . you're reading during breakfast cause the book just got so good? his toe is rubbing your calf up and down periodically (he won't stop no matter how many weird looks you give him)

— conclusion: he doesn't at all get it what it is, but if it makes you happy he will spend all the berries in the world to buy you those books (plz know if you actually ask him to jokingly off an author for killing your favourite character, he will do it. please don't ask him that.)

— he's just so supportive and nice 😭😭

"my girlfriends a nerd, I love her" (ussop explained to him what a nerd was and now he's introducing you like this to everybody)

zoro:

the shades tho 😎

— I'm convinced this mf can't read either

— even he can there's like literally no evidence to prove it and the entire crew has come to the conclusion that he gets lost even with clear directions because he just can't read please 😌👌

— at the start, he actually thinks it's dead stupid to invest so much time reading books when you can do other stuff like getting stronger, sleeping, literally doing anything else (luffy backs up his opinion with full enthusiasm)

— i mean like he's seen you sob at 7 in the morning over breakfast cause your fav character died and now he's confused as to why are you spending money and buying books if they make you cry so hard (he doesn't understand the concept of angst im afraid)

— but over time he just accepts it as something you enjoy and well, if it makes you happy then who is he to question it?

— acts like he doesn't care/isn't listening when you're rambling about the plot and how thE MAIN CHARACTER IS IN LOVE WITH HIS ENEMY AND VICE VERSA SKEJFHSJKSN but is actually fully listening

— he's actually invested at one point

"but they are enemies? why does he wanna be with him?"

"you don't get it! thats the appeal!!"

"the appeal is forcing a knife on somebody's throat?" he's laughing, "as if you'd enjoy it if i threatened you with my swords"

"... i would actually enjoy that"

he is now asking nami for loan to send you to a therapist (nami has seen you nosebleed over fictional characters and is considering giving money away to zoro for free. you really do need help.)

— as I said, he's invested now (although he does question your taste every now and then) but he'd force you to either summarize the plot to him as he trains or read out loud so he can hear the story as it goes.

— so naturally you're now sitting on his back, reading out loud as he does push-ups

— this beloved himbo has now formed strong opinions about characters and will battle you with headcanons because "there's no fucking way the hero would ever go back to the villain after that! that's ridiculous! if he does I'll sell my swords off."

— will remember the stuff you told him, no matter how trivial, so if you get off an island and he spots a keychain from your fav book series he's spending whatever money he has left to buy you it

"oh excellent choice! who are you buying it for?" the shopkeeper lady questions aloud

"oh, my girlfriend." he's smiling, "my girlfriends a nerd."

— actually looks forward to you telling him all the plot details and jokes at this point (one might call him a part of the fandom now)

— when you're a crying, sobbing mess because a character died, he's genuinely comforting you (no matter how bad he is at it)

"yn it's okay, you want some sake?" he is hugging you, patting your head like you're a child

"no 😭😭" you sob harder into his chest

"well... that's the best i can offer"

he tried. it's not his fault you don't wanna drink your feelings away.

— conclusion: he started off thinking its stupid and now he's an honorary nerd. would never admit it though. stubborn asshole.

sanji:

he's actually so pretty tho ^^

— he actually liked reading books before you even joined the crew although his tbr consists of cookbooks and auto-biographies about the people he has some interest in

— he started reading so that he could impress zeff with his knowledge on cooking and other miscellaneous stuff (imagine kid!sanji reading a book till late night under a lamp cause he wants to impress his old man that's so cute 😭😭)

— respects your hobbies when he finds out you like reading

— and then he sees your book collection. whY ARE THERE LIKE 5000 BOOKS HERE?! NOW HES SCARED FOR YOUR SANITY CAUSE GIRL WTF

— he hears you recommend a book to robin/nami once and now he's running to the nearest bookstore on the next island you guys land on to buy it

— he obviously did it to impress you and win you over but goddamn that book was actually pretty nice. so, the next time he asks you for recommendations he's actually a bit sincere

— now you're both in a book club of your own (which makes luffy mad cause why are you leaving him out of conversations :/)

— like zoro, he often asks for updates on the book you're currently reading while he cooks everyone food. he loves hearing you talk about the things you like.

— when he sees you crying over books, he is making you sweet stuff to soothe you, holding you and rubbing your back supportingly, peppering kisses to make you feel better

— he's so fine 😫😫

— anyways, also def the kind of person to ask you to roleplay things in real life

"yn-saaaan" his voice is bubbly, "can i ask you something?"

"mhm?"

"the last book you read–" his face is going a little bit red, "you think we can maybe... do that irl?"

now it's your turn to go red

— but no fr, he's so so supportive of your little hobby like yes baby! read those books and have fun imagining people in your head

— 100% matches your vibe when you crush on fictional characters cause "you're right. he is actually very attractive" (a bi king we love)

— once zoro made fun of you for reading and this was his response: "you can't even read, mosshead. the next time you speak shit I'll kick your ass."

"who said I CANT READ? AND AS IF ILL LET YOU KICK MY ASS!"

"I TOTALLY WILL KICK YOUR ASS"

now they are fighting while ussop, luffy and chopper laugh in the background

— but yes he loves staying up late, reading with you before you both cuddle and fall asleep

— you once read about a specific sort of dish in a book and mentioned that it sounds delicious so now obviously he has to go make that dish. it doesn't matter if it's 1 am at night.

— when nami asks him what he's cooking, he just smiles and shrugs, "i dunno either, im just trying to make yn happy. she's such a nerd"

— conclusion: an enabler, an enthusiast. this man is ready to buy you books and then read them if it makes you happy. only the finest for his favourite lady <3

a/n: enjoy my wayward thoughts about these fine men! m.list

[passionesolja]

Ascended!Astarion Stans is so crazy to me because forget about what Ascended!Astarion would do to Tav/Durge when he all insane in the membrane on power, but think about the vampirespawns he would sire and what their lives would be like.

This man—my sweet Angel—isn’t a moral and upstanding person. Even when you kill Cazador, that’s the beginning of the real healing process, not the end. So imagine this man having vampirespawn who are in the same situation he was in while he was enslaved to Cazador. Being a full vampire corrupts and twists people into power hungry monsters, so imagine how bad an Ascended Vampire would be. He wouldn’t be starting a mf soup kitchen, he’d be Mega Cazador.

He’d be making them eat putrid rats and bugs, he’d be locking them in coffins for a year, he’d probably crave even more power than being Ascended has given him so he’d try to make a deal with a devil to and use them as sacrifices. Then you mix in the lack of normal vampiric limitations he’d have and it would be even worst.

Like imagine you chilling in Baldur’s Gate, walking down the street and then Astarion turns you into one of his vampirespawns. Dawg you’d probably be better off being Cazador’s spawn. Everybody’s like “oh ascended!astarion is so sexy” and just not talking about the horror of an Ascanded!Astarion. And god forbid that Astarion sees himself in one of his vampirespawns, im sure he’d treat them the worst because of his internal self hatred and also because he knows what he was able to do as a vampirespawn when he broke free

[crazylittlejester]

Okay Jes, so, I took a poll a while back to figure out what Sky should be for the monster AU. He’s a Changeling now. Basically, a fairy-or maybe some other creature who knows-swapped him out with a regular Hylian when he was very young. Maybe the original Link and his family died in an accident or something, and Sky was left if his original’s place. What if one of the Golden Goddesses did it, OH what if his Loftwing did it! That’s why they connected so easily, the Loftwing was tasked by the goddess or something to leave Sky on Skyloft and stuff idk I’m making this up as I go.

Anyways, changeling lore(screenshot from Wikipedia)

Sky is shorter than some of the other Links(he’s like in the middleish of height), he’s like 5’3 but he’s shorter than a good chunk of other Skyloftians(I think it’s been a while). He can also have those sharp, almost shark-like teeth, they can be a bit long and pointy, as a treat. Also, uncanny insight? Like a speed runner would have? Sorry, I’m a bit nonsensical right now, anyhow Sky, displaying unusual behavior? Yeah, I can see that. Mf jumped on a chandelier and that’s not even the weirdest thing he’s done.

Sky didn’t realize he was a Changeling until Impa(I don’t know if old or young Impa would be better tbh) told him he was. He did not take that well, he knew he was weird, that he was different from everybody else, but he didn’t think he wasn’t even one of them. By the time LU happened, he’s more okay about his state of being, but he still thinks of himself as a Hylian first, monster second.

I think that when Sky first meets Wars, he tries to be like “hello fellow Hylian! I am normal like you, do not worry!” But Wars, being a human, is able to detect monsters easier than most hylians would. Also he’s spent a lot of time with fairies, and Changelings are intrinsically fae-like, so Wars just looks him dead in the eye and says “I know what you are.” He doesn’t, he has a clue but he knows that Sky isn’t Hylian and does not want to deal with that right now. Sky thinks they already have bad blood between them, but they don’t, Wars is just tired of the everything.

Anyways, that’s enough of that semi-coherent rambling, hope you have a great rest of your day!

IM OBSESSED WITH THIS IM SO OBSESSED WITH THIS OH MY GOD EATING IT I LOVE THIS AU SO MUCH

also i saw the “i know what you are” and I have no idea if you meant Wars would say it in a homophobic dog kinda way or a kobeni losing her fucking shit kinda way and my brain combined them into something so cursed and so fucking funny i spent the past four minutes in tears gasping for fucking air

i hope you have a wonderful rest of your day as well!! :)

[exactlysizzlingdonut]

I. JJTS FINISHED WATCHING MONSTER AND HOLYYYYYYY FUCK

IM SO SAD THAT THIS IS THE END 🙁

SPOILERS!!

NO WAY JOHAN ESCAPED AGAIN BRO HE'S GONNA FUCK EVERYTHING UP 💀

ALSO TENMA IS SUCH A SWEETHEART WHAT THE HELL.. JOINING DOCTORS WITHOUT BORDERS HES A GEM I CANT BELIEVE THE LACK OF TENMA CONTENT AFTER ALL THE GOOD THINGS THAT HE HAS DONE FOR EVERYBODY IN THIS SERIES

ABSOLUTE GEM OF A MAN I CANT EVEN EXPRESS HOW I FEEL ABOUT JIM WITHOUT SOUNDING FERAL AND CRINGE CRONGE (potential verbal appreciation post? It’ll probs be rotting in my drafts HAHSHD)

Also can we talk about how pretty Nina’s voice is when she’s serious, it really reminds me of nausicaa’s voice WHIHC IS A WIN WIN!

Really wanted to find out their real names

ALSO WHEN ROBERTO WAS ADOLF REIN WHATEVER??? THINKJNG ABOIT HOW GRIMMER WAS TALKING ABT HIS BESTIE OMG I NEARLY CRIED BRO.

THAT ALSO LEFT ME WITH MY JAW DROPPED BECAUSE NAW WHAT THE HELL HOW DO U EXPECT ME TO CASUALLY REGISTER THAT INFORMATION WHEN YOU DROP SUCH A BIG BOMB ON ME. AT LEAST WARN ME 😀

Johan being a menace to society (in the worst way possible) never fails to make me giggle

Adding on, Roberto is a meme of a character cos just when you think everything is going okay, he makes an appearance and suddenly you know damn well everything is not going okay anymore

ALSO I DIDNT KNOW GRIMMER WAS GOING TO FUCKING DIE??? WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT ABOUT

FRANZ BONAPARTA BEING SUCH A SISSY,, GOING ON A MF TANGENT OF HOW HE FUCJED UP LIKE YEAH NO SHIT STFU

wim being so adorbs <33

EVA AND MARTIN BRO THEY HAD IT GOING;;;(;;(::-6;;) WHY DID HE HAVE TO DIE

Eva redemption arc I mean queen was lowkey killing it throughout the series.. sometimes questionable but otherwise ily (but I HATED how she treated tenma 😒)

NINA GETTING THE BEST SCORES GO YOU QUEEN YOU DESERVE IT

What was Johan and Nina’s mum doing bro- did that favouritism play a role in this outrage.. guess we’ll never know!

OH NOT TO MENTION MONSTER SOUNDTRACK SLAPS SOOOO HARD. SKIPPING THE OPENINB FEELS LIKE A CRIME. FULLY LISTENED TO THE ENDING IN THE LAST EPSODE BC YK I WANT TO GO OUT PROPERLY AND DAMN IT’S RLLY NICE? BUT I DONT THINK I WOULDVE BEEN ABLE TO LISTEN TO IT AT THE END OF EACH EP BECAUSE MAN THESE CLIFF HANGERS AND HOOKS MAKE ME GO FERAL FOR THE NEXT EP

WHENEVER “THE SEEDS OF TIME” STARTED PLAYING IN A SCENE I WOULD GET SO EXCITED IT’S PROBABLY MY FAV OST RN. OMG AND “Present” IT’S SUCH A CUTE OST AARGRGEGSGESHSGDFFEDD

THIS AJIME IS SO GOOD HOW COME I BARELY SEE OR HEAR PPL TALKING ABT IT… ???DEFINITELY TOP 3 BRO MAYBE EVEN TOP 2 (idek what my anime ranking list looks like 👹)

LUNGE CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT ARC REAL?? When he said he’d buy a beer for grimmer n they can talk about this whole case 💔💔

Nah Lunge was mad funny, his only personality trait was hunting tenma down,, then half way through the series he goes “I’ve made a fatal mistake 😗” n reconsiders his life decisions. The audacity,, and I was loving it.

Milan bro 😢 AND TENMA TELLING THE KIDS TO STUDY HARD AND NOT GIVE UP?? I NEED A TENMA IN MY LIFE.

DIETER IS SUCH A CUTIE PATOOTIE OMLLL

okay after some reflection johan saying "which one didn't she need" or stmhn like that at the end BAFFLED me. it made me really sad too

oh yeah HAHAHAHA johan being an iconic cross dresser. you can't tell me he wasn't rocking that outfit when he was with suk... also when he dressed as young anna HIS FACE WAS SO FUNNY "welcome back! :D" bro is so devious HEGHAHSDG

just thhnking about that tenma push up scene it had me giggling and swinging my feet OGH LET;S NOT FORGET WHEN HE WAS LIKE "good girl" TO NINA .... that's the stuff i want to hear frfr

on a serious note though, he's such a good father figure. this man would make the best father ever.. i've seen multiple comments saying that even johan saw him as a father figure and LORD DOES THAT MAKE ME UPSET :(((((

that nameless monster book spoke facts at the end tho, johan is such a beautiful name no joke

his hair looks so fluffy too

HAHA no how about the scream he scrumpt i was lowkey embarrassed like johan you can scream sm better than that.

idk why but he's so fine when he drops the ground- both times in the library and in the rain. i swear it's the hair and his back

yk this anime reminds me of that one tiktok sounds with the garden song that says "no matter where you are, everyone is always connected". it's quite cool to think about it holistically, but in a sense it's also so surreal, and even scary. this masterpiece is an extreme reflection of our world imo, with many elements of truth and reality. anyways i'll leave this kind of stuff for another post (draft lol). but honestly though, i really liked this series. maybe since it's older, it has that sense of authenticity?? not invalidating other anime series but idk. i really enjoyed it.

RAHAHGSHJDHFGHJG LET'S STAY TOGETHER BEING TENMA'S FAVOURITE SONG OMG THIS IS KILLING ME HES SO my heart is aching sm..

im jus reading about tenma's childhood rn :')

WAIT THETRS;S SOMETHING CALLED ANOTHER MONSTER?/ IS THIS A SEQUEL OR SMTHN... well yk what time it is then!

[nnq]

My dude there are a lot of people that acknowledge Kaeya's trauma of the past and what he goes through. I'm not really sure how anything in the event drove you to the point of hating on Diluc when even Kaeya acknowledged his choice to reveal that to Diluc when he did was bad... and there is no implication anywhere that he was on the back burner for things. I am less familiar with their lore but I've read both and never have gotten this impression. Can you explain what you mean?

im SAYING lets stop stanning glorified ass white boys with anger and daddy issues who never apologize for violent actions. the only reason kaeya apologized is cuz mihoyo wants to make diluc a victim and the most tragic wittle bpd bitch and give him EVERY bit of mfs sympathy. i literally dont think theres a single character that dislikes diluc in game except for diona bcuz of wine or whatever

we already know mihoyo is racist asaf but theres not a single bit of lore for how or why kaeya got the cavalry captain position, the kind of things he did growing up with diluc, only that he was diluc’s ‘trusted friend and supporter’ until he somehow ‘failed his duty’ (literal story words) by…. not stopping the monster that killed crepus in the expedition DILUC WAS LEADING?!?

ultimately, even though this event was centered almost entirely on diluc (which, in itself, is just disappointing to me) there was SO many references to crepus dying and the aftermath of it, but not a single mention in all of the lore of anyone feeling sorry for kaeya when his fuckin dad died. not to mention, mihoyo wants everybody to believe kaeya gettin injured was his own fault and he deserved it, and thats precisely why they keep writing him as extremely nice and longing for diluc again. while diluc does absolutely FUCK ALL for his FAMILYLESS EX-BROTHER who he tried to duel on the NIGHT OF THEIR FATHERS DEATH, and since then, has shown very little to none affection or even consideration for kaeya except…. keeping some letters, and not killing him?

tbh i just think we should be a little more critical and observant of this Edgy Hot White Boy treating a brown man like shit and having all the story justify it because ‘it was his fault to start with’.

TLDR: Diluc is a white womans wet dream and thats why his backstory is almost entirely pity-inducing and Kaeya is set up as an antihero side character, when in terms of lore and story significance, it should be the exact opposite