#every transfemme I know owns one

[eribytevt]

I love blahaj <3

art by @erisaconitum (https://twitter.com/ErisAconitum)

[drivemysoul]

i changed my url on my sideblog (it used to be transboy[character] and now it’s completely different) and it’s making me real sad and conflicted and confused about a lot

[yesyourstalker]

Mahi: Yeah I just got back from closing the store by myself.......again....*sigh*.... Like I get that he has a life outside of work and all. But why is he always absent. He always has some shit to do that doesn't involve going to work. He's either going cross country or traveling outside of the country!......*sigh*..... I'm broke. You need to take me to more places....... Yes, you do! ........nu-uh ........ He doesn't have that kind of money to do things by himself.... I sent pictures of his apartment. He's clearly using ikkan's money....... Come on! It'll be nice. We can plan a nice little vacay........... Yeah I already made it home. I just need to change my clothes and I'll head over to your place. Just give me one 1 second................... Warabi!! I'm home I bought you a mango smoothie from coral's- WHO THE FUCK ARE- WHO ARE YOU?!? WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY APARTMENT!................ Is that my towel!?..... Dude who the fuck- uh..uhhh

Warabi: He's with me! He's with me! I let him in! I'm sorry he's not a stranger.... To me

Mahi:...................

Warabi: this is Baja. The guy I was talking about.. uhehehe..

Baja: hey. You must be Mahi.........

Mahi:.............. Yeah I'm still on the phone........ No, I'm fine.....*sigh*... I'm gonna have to call you back... No, I don't want to cancel plans. Just give me one second...... Okay bye........... Warabi can I talk to you for a sec.... Hi, hello.... Baja...

_______________________________________________

Mahi: Warabi what the fuck?!

Warabi what?

Mahi: you could have told me you were going to bring someone over, he scared the shit out of me!

Warabi: I'm sorry you told me you were going over to mizole's after work so I didn't really think about it. I would have told you If I knew you were going to stop here first.

Mahi:.Ok that's fair I guess...... So that's him. That's Baja? He looks.................................hm

Warabi: yeah He's pretty cool and hehehehehe. nice.. hehehe he's visiting for a while and he wanted to come over.

Mahi: ok........ Why is he in my towel?

Warabi: He Just took a shower. I told him to use the green towel, I think he might be colorblind....so cute

Mahi: ok........... .......

Warabi: what?

Mahi: nothing......... So.... What is this? What are you two?

Warabi: I don't know.... I-I like him,I think. We're just friends at the moment........ Could be more later...... when I get to know him... Hehehehehe He's cute, right? Tell me he's cute.

Mahi:.................. Yeah he's alright.

Warabi:............ ha. Ha. Go to your rancid boyfriend's house.

Mahi: Don't call him that! Fuck you. I'm going. oh uh.. sorry

Baja: You're good. Sorry for....... All of this. Hehe.... Maybe our next meeting won't be as...... Awkward..... I'm sorry I didn't know it was your towel. I just need to take a quick shower. I got off of a 12-hour flight, I rushed all the way to the airport, I forgot to freshen up and I'm still waiting to check in to my hotel. I texted Warabi and he-

Mahi: it's fine really it's fine. Sorry I freaked out. hahah .... You seem pretty cool.............

Baja: Yeah I'll be here for a while. Maybe you guys can show me around if you're free. I haven't been here in a long while............ This is kind of weird but like you're the first tetra I've seen that's not one of my 20 something siblings in a long while.... It's kinda weird..hahahaha.

Mahi: hahaha...... I felt the same way when I moved here. You're going to see a lot of different species living here..... Hehe... Nice to seeing you....

_______________________________________________

Mizole: so I went to the recording booth today and that little shit Paul flipped me off..... Unwarranted. I swear the minute kids start developing fingers. They become menaces to society......*eating* .... That reminds me, winterfest is coming up. Is Neta going to have a Christmas party downstairs like you did last year because Yoko wants to know cuz they want The Golden bazookas to play a gig-

Mahi: Am I small?

Mizole: Yes. She has a new song for the holidays and she wants to debut at the party before she records it. A lot of musicians are going to be there and they might invite their agents as well. They want to see if they can get a record deal.

Mahi: do you think it'll be better if I go to the gym at my apartment or your apartment

Mizole: My gym is bigger. Honestly Yoko is fucking stupid. I told her years ago that 'agua studios' fucking sucked. She should have gone to 'ink towers' when they started ink theory......they have better advertising, better marketing...... I'm-

Mahi: do you think I'm short

Mizole: we're the same height. I'm trying to convince chirpy chips to get a contract but nooooooo they want to be independent.... They want to be their own boss....*Pffth* they just want to be different sooo bad.. can I have some real linguine?

Mahi: yeah.... Don't take all the crab meat asshole!

Mizole: I'm just taking a little bit!..... Also you look fine how you are babe you don't need to change anything. Except for those green fins

Mahi: I know....I just.....*huff*.... Warabi has a new friend....... he looks a little bit like me but........broader and........taller...really fit.....Hm

Mizole: let me see a picture.................... Ugliest fuck I've ever seen in my life. can't compare to you babe.

Mahi: (wheeze) what!..... No he's not. He looks just like me..... He's- he's...... We could be related! Cod I hope we're not related

Mizole: no I don't see it... You're a lot better looking than him... You don't have eye bags and ragged fins...... You're clearly the better looking person

Mahi: ....... You're fucking stupid and not eating all my linguine......... thanks babe... You Sap

Mizole: No problem

_______________________________________________

Mahi:......*sleeping*.......ummm...fuck.... Hello... Hey Neta....

Neta: hey Mahi. I'm heading home now I should be back in the morning... I might open the store and then go back home to get some sleep... I already scheduled Candi to help you with the shift

Mahi: ok..... How was your trip home?..

Neta: it was nice... I just visited some family, doing wedding plans..........oh I called you because I have a meeting with construction workers and an interior designer later in the week. I'm going to need you to be on your best behavior and if they show up when I'm not there, there's some paperwork in a lock box the code is 814- (beep)

Mahi: Why did you do that?

Mizole: he could have called you in the morning or have told you in person. It's in the middle of the night and he's voice is annoying me.......*yawn*.....Good night [kiss]

Mahi:....*sigh*.........

Text

Neta: did you hang up on me? That hurt my feelings >:(

the code 81420

Mahi: everything hurts your feelings baby

I got the code

mizole hung up on you sorry boss gn

Neta: stfu gn

Mahi almost drowned at mahi-mahi resort but was rescued by @fish-at-fish-fish-resort

[justsomuchhacking]

So like another thing about the transgender mecha discourse is like... the mech can be a metaphor for empowerment and an extension of the customizable self, but specifically for transfemmes the metaphor also works in the other direction!

The mech is safe. And it is familiar, and you have gotten used to controlling it. You are told that your highest purpose is violence, but that's not true about you, though it might be true of the mech.

The mech is safe. It is many layers of cold steel and machinery between you and the world. When people see the mech, they see power and strength. But you will have to crawl out of it if you wish to be seen and known by your name, instead of your callsign*.

The mech is safe. It does not take courage to pilot - it takes courage to leave. Anonymous, stoic violence in a shell that is not your body vs the horrifying ordeal of crawling out of a numb pile of metal and hoping people will love the weird-looking girl who is a little unused to socializing. On account of all the mech-piloting.

Anyway if I was going to write transgender mecha fiction the robot would be the closet. War is hell, truth is life, get out of the fucking robot, girl, and live!

Other small things I would include in an anti-war transgender mecha story:

"Why did you stop being a mecha pilot? You were so good at it!"

Patriarchal military industrial complex discovers trans people are just better at using the weird neural mech piloting interface. This plays out as badly as you'd expect.

"cis" pilot who has an unusually high sync with the mecha and the veteran pilots who Definitely Know.

Nothing good ever happens as a result of mecha battles and the reader should start to feel anxious about which beloved character Isn't Going To Be The Same after this one.

This would of course be very difficult to pull off in a way that's like... as fundamentally entertaining as giant robot fights where the giant robot is a metaphor for personal agency and the power of the individual, where a very traumatized trans girl incinerates mecha hitler with a blue-and-pink laser beam she got from self-actualizing. I recognize that my version is harder to make and definitely not for everyone. But I think it should be made. Both should be made!

*historical note here about callsigns - in fiction people choose their own but in the military these are chosen for you by your unit - and if yours is cool it usually means that your unit thinks you're a dweeb. If you try to make people use a callsign you chose for yourself, there is no doubt at all about whether you are a dweeb. So for me a callsign is a terrible stand-in for a true name. Knowing this fact ruins movies, because every Cool Callsign Protagonist makes you think "Iceman? Oh, he definitely got caught masturbating in the walk-in freezer".

[smitethestate]

So in terms of what we need to look out for first with the new Trump presidency, I think the first threat to a huge number of people is going to be mass deportation efforts.

One thing to consider about Trump and Project 2025 is that Trump's first priorities will be himself, his money, his power, and his ego. He doesn't care about anyone or anything but himself. He doesn't care about Project 2025. So what comes first will be about his image and what the people who can bribe him the most want.

Immigration is a huge thing with him, tied up in his ego and his racism. All immigrants, even those who have gained US citizenship, are at risk.

If you are an immigrant or have loved ones who are, look up organizations like the Immigrant Defense Project. Find immigrant defense lawyers in your area. Know your rights and which of them will be stripped when he invokes the Alien Enemies Act on 1798. The ACLU and other human rights orgs will be fighting him every step of the way, but prepare for anything. He will be giving ICE a lot more power. He says he won't tag in the military for this but don't believe a word he says, ever.

For the rest of us, if you're looking to help, you can join or revive local groups that work to alert people to ICE arrests and move to intervene. Forming crowds around arrest vehicles has worked many times to stop arrests from happening. That rules.

If you can't or don't want to join an org, get in touch with your immigrant neighbors, coworkers, etc. Start chatting with them, let them know you want them to stay and you're available to help. We must be in community with our migrant neighbors to effectively help them.

Start thinking about what you're willing to do. All the way to do you have an attic or other hidden space in your home where you can hide people? Are you willing and prepared to be arrested? Defying the government puts you at risk of imprisonment, and you need to be prepared for what that means, both in a practical sense and mentally/emotionally.

Speak with your partners, roommates, friends, and comrades about this. Know who is at the most risk to be arrested and what they will likely experience in prison. For example, BIPOC and disabled people are at a much higher risk when dealing with police and ICE agents. Under no circumstances would I recommend trans women/transfemme folks risk jail or prison time. Be prepared to risk sustaining psychological trauma. Draw and maintain the boundaries you need around any activism, resistance, or revolutionary activity.

I'll go more in depth on what migrants have to expect during the first 100 days of the second Trump term in a later post.

Please add more ideas and resources below if you have them, or make your own post and alert me so I can boost.

[catboybiologist]

Do you now, or have you ever, called yourself a femboy?

Curious about something. The initial craze over the exact femboy aesthetic seemed to mostly be from 2019-2023 or so, and is much calmer now. For one, it does seem like it increased the overall, casual acceptance of cis gender nonconformity, but also helped a lot of people discover their own trans identities, whether they were transfemme, nonbinary, or transmascs finding new ways to relate to femininity. Obviously femboys aren't "dead", but they're not the same level of novelty that they were a few years ago.

This is going to be a very, very loose poll, and I know it won't cover every situation. I'm also sorry for making over generalizations! It's difficult to cover every situation. But feel free to let me know your own personal relationship with the term in reblogs and replies!

If these options are confusing, let me know! For example, I would choose "binary transfemme, stopped using the term when I realized I was trans"

Obviously if your experience doesn't cleanly fit in, I would like the best approximation! Eg, if there was a period of time where you used the term post transition, but gradually grew uncomfortable with it, you could choose the same option as me.

[genderqueerdykes]

your post makes no sense? all of the identities that you named are NOT cis men??? and quite frankly it feels transphobic for you to consider them that

i'm a trans woman so i'm part of the group i'm commenting on. you do realize that a bigender trans woman who identifies as a trans woman and a cis man is still partially a cis man and that's not transphobic and it doesn't invalidate their trans womanhood, right? you do realize that a transfemme cis man is still a cis man and that doesn't invalidate their femmehood, right? you do realize a transfemme genderfluid person who identifies as a cis man is still partially a cis man and it doesn't invalidate their other genders, right? being bigender doesn't completely erase 1/2 of the identity. being a woman doesn't cancel out being a man. are you seriously saying that because that person has a queer identity means that it totally erases the fact that they are literally also identifying in plain english that they are also a cis man?

immersing yourself in the transfeminine community will help with this drastically. i don't know you or your history, but most of my IRL friends are transfeminine, myself included. there are many of my transfem friends who never want to be considered a man, and that's perfectly fine. however, i would say a good 1/3rd of the trans women i've met have also still identified as a cis gay man on some level. without shame, without it taking away their womanhood. existing alongside each other; parallel. if you meet and befriend a good number of transfeminine people you will find out that a lot of transfems identify as cis men and trans women at the same time. that's not new. many trans women identify as cis gay men and trans women at the same time. like, it's an extremely common thing. bigender means having two genders- one is trans woman, the other is cis man for people who identify this way. this person is a trans woman, a cis man, and a bigender person.

this doesn't make that person a bigender person, and a trans woman only. why do you think it's okay to completely erase that person's male identity? why do you think it's okay to completely ignore someone's manhood for the sake of their other identity? cis manhood isn't "icky". it doesn't get cancelled out by queerness. them partially being a cis man does not invalidate their trans womanhood. wake the fuck up, you're being transmisogynstic as hell right now and it's embarrassing.

a question you must ask yourself: why are you insinuating that it is transphobic to refer to someone correctly? my post specifically referred to trans women who also identify as cis men in their own words. why, in your mind, is this a bad thing? you MUST ask yourself why it's "transphobic" to acknowledge these identities and refer to these individuals correctly. you must ask yourself why you're putting your comfort before someone else's representation. there are transfemme cis men. there are transfeminine genderfluid people who identify as cis men when they are men. there are non binary cis men. why do you think that cis men cannot be queer, or trans? why are you assuming that a trans woman being a cis man at the same time is transphobic? why

this reeks of "woman cannot be man at the same time or else woman get cancelled out"

what is confusing about trans women having multiple genders? what's wrong with a bigender, multigender, genderfluid, genderqueer, genderfuck, gender non conforming, and/or intersex trans woman having a male identity that's also cis? what's wrong with that? how does that erase or "conflict" with the rest of their identity in any capacity?

there are bigender trans men who are cis women and trans men at the same time. there are bigender trans women who are cis men and trans women at the time. literally how does that not make sense. please explain to me how it doesn't make sense. every single person who has told me i'm not making sense hasn't told me why. please explain to me why you proudly and loudly saying that bi/multigender trans women don't exist is okay, but me fighting for people to understand that they do is transphobic.

stop virtue signalling and shoot the cop in your mind dead. in your attempt to look like a hero and earn brownie points all you did was show that you literally don't understand multigender, genderqueer, non binary, and other gender vast experiences. trans women won't magically like you more now because you decided to show everyone that you think it's transphobic to call someone who overtly in their own words identifies as a cis man, a cis man.

cis men aren't the devil. calm down and stop freaking the hell out over the fact that you can in fact be a cis man and a trans woman at the same time. the sun will still rise. the world will keep turning. it's not transphobic to refer to someone by the terms they ask you to use. get over yourself on this one, anon. that's your cross to bear: you are the transphobe. do yourself a favor and look into multigenderism before you decide to comment on trans theory again

you thought yourself into a corner and you can't find your way out.

[sheepwavehdg]

HDG(?) story thoughts: Socialization

Socialization is a noncon fic by ashinbloom and transfemtomgirl that examines the horrifying ways trans women are treated in queer spaces, especially by men, through the lens of the HDG setting and its mechanics.

I would describe it as "HDG(?)". It is notable as one of very few fics that the Loret team has ever specifically described as not fitting the HDG setting, and I can't even really say I disagree, exactly? It's fucking complicated. I dont enjoy Socialization in the same way I enjoy most HDG stores. I read it and I feel seen and understood in my experiences, it is a commiseration of the lived experience of a disabled person having to deal with violent transmisogny from within her own community as well as outside. I will be blunt- this story is not what I think of when I think of HDG. it is a twisted knife in my gut, a reminder of some of the worst things that have ever happened to me, and i cannot stop thinking about it.

It makes me feel less alone, to know that the ways I was mistreated and abused by some transmasculine peers in the past was not something I made up, that I am not alone(especially since gaslighting was always part of the toolkit anyway!) In this way, it shares commonalities with the rest of the HDG tag, in that the pain it reflects feels very, very familiar to me.

the premise is simple. It is a second person fic, which is a frankly brilliant choice, about a transfemme reader navigating a wardship. her transmasculine friend, who is already a floret, manipulates her into his bed and the vines of the affini.

It is notable that this summary, plotwise, is not any different from many existing stories within HDG. where it diverges is the tone. Victor is like if someone took every guy who I didnt break up with months past when I should have and combined them into a figure almost as systemically enabled to take advantage of you as his real life counterparts are. the worst part of all is the screaming voice in the back of my head that I can fix him. it is a spectacle to behold, and I eagerly await the protaganist to fall into his clutches.

The affini in the story are used more as a backdrop to tell a story about how humans are shitty to each other. I think It is meaningful more as a story about the transfeminine experience than as a story about plommy, and you should go into it expecting for it to hurt you, and for that pain to be a cathartic experience of being seen.

The best/worst part of reading Socialization is knowing I would do the exact same thing in the protaganist 's shoes. I would believe I could fix him. Watching someone with every one of my own weaknesses be pulled apart by a predator I have known intimately far too many times is arousing in ways that horrify me. I hate how much I love this story. I hate how I find myself rooting for Victor to pull the reader apart more, because if he wins, maybe she can be happy. It's incredible, I cannot wait for more, because I am apparently a deep masochist.

[wordy-little-witch]

From this post

Tldr: transfemme buggy and the quaking of the seas

I have an absolutely unhealthy obsession with fantasy science. I have an unhealthy obsession for one piece. Mix em together and you get this:

Devil Fruits are so freaking weird man. They are supernatural, by common story telling throughout the series, and then you find out they can be replicated through science. You can make whole ass test tube babies with those powers by mixing source DNA and Lunarian DNA. The accessibility to research on Devil Fruits is lacking, and I do whole heartedly believe that's due to the world government. But we DO know some specific things.

Zoans, Logias and Paramecias are the three categories, then they have sub categories. Zoans can awaken. But can Logias? Can Paramecias? Are some Devil Fruits mislabeled due to lack of research or misinformation? It's basically highly unusual biochemistry.

I already believe whole heartedly that Buggy has some knowledge of medicine - she's not a doctor by any means, but she knows enough to take care of some simple to moderate concerns. Nurse practitioner, basically.

I feel like Buggy, no longer drowning the drsphoria-she-didn't-realize-she-had, would be open to exploring the world and being as curious and fascinated as she damn well pleases.

It starts, as many things do in her life, with something learned from or about a certain man in a straw hat. First Roger, then Shanks, now Luffy - strawhatted monsters plague her life. But this monster has done something even Roger and Shanks deemed dangerous - he mad her curious.

The tales of what happened in Wano spread like wildfire. The Strawhats learn about Cross Guild. Cross Guild learns about them not too long after. And Buggy pauses when Crocodile laughs his distinctive way as he reads a passage from the article in the news.

Paramecias do not allow for transformation. She knows this. She researched Devil Fruits near obsessively after the Pineapple Incident to cope with the new fear and then a genuine fascination. She has read damn near every available document on Devil Fruits in the Cardinal Seas and Grandline. She knows about Devil Fruits.

Luffy's Devil Fruit turns everyone on its head. A normal person might chalk it up to him being a D, might say that that little spitfire doesn't follow logic in any capacity; Buggy knows better.

Buggy knows because she is a D herself, something she only recently announced, by blood and bond both. Buggy knows Luffy is not an idiot, that he does follow his own logic, and she knows that that has nothing to do with his personal logic.

Buggy knows this, and Buggy knows Devil Fruits, and now Buggy is Thinking.

She quickly comes to a few hypotheses.

1) Luffy's Devil Fruit is either not a paramecia at all, which would mean the information available has been altered, changed or purposefully misrepresented.

2) The study on Devil Fruits only goes so far - she knows this specially to be true, given how she herself had so many questions that have yet to be answered regarding the topic. If that is the case, Luffy may well have simply harnessed an otherwise unaddressed or undiscovered aspect of his Fruit specifically or Fruits in general.

2B) if Luffy's Devil Fruit can change his surroundings, can Awaken like a Zoan, then could any Fruit do that? Could Logias? Could all Paramecias? Could hers-?

And she stops.

Buggy's got a history of pyromania, bordering on terrorism ((and she'll argue those semantics another time, the WG is so annoying-)). She loves a good bomb, a good explosion, she adores making her bombs and updating weapons and studying chemistry.

She also was a Warlord, brief as it was, and absolutely snooped around the marine headquarters. The schematics and information on their infamous Buster Calls was sparse, she'd give them that, but it only took her three meetings to get a good grasp on it all. The concept was good, she'd admit that, but it was wild, untamed, unrefined. It was simply a glorified firework meets cannon ball meets biochemical warfare.

But it had given her Ideas.

Marines do their schematics so oddly, but she could appreciate a change in perspective, especially when it also inspired her.

Explosions are chemicals, are catalysts, are combustion - and combustion is fission, is fusion, is expansive.

If she could find a way to cause the fission and fusion on her specific terms, could isolate, map, and replicate the event on command, it could revolutionize everything.

She's had the thought in mind for a while prior to this, but the revelation regarding Luffy, Devil Fruits and the woeful lack of research and study there leaves her with a fire in her best.

Especially since Buggy D Clown, Emperor and Captain and Chairwoman, has the Chop Chop Fruit.

She can split and reassemble at will.

She can control the fissures and fusions of her body.

How deep, how small, can that control go? Is there a set area around her? It works on her clothes. Why does it work on her clothes? Is there a range already? Can she control it? Can she expand it?

Can she impose it on other things?

Could Buggy actually make a seas damned mega bomb with her Devil Fruit?

That doesn't even begin on her endless thoughts on others. Does Alvida have a range? Can she impose her ability elsewhere? It supposedly worked on her weight, but that's not friction - what's up with that? Is it internal? Would blunt force trauma hurt her? Could blades? If it slips OFF, could things slip THROUGH?

And Galdino, his abilities are incredible. But it's a Paramecia, isn't it? Why isn't it a Logia? Is it because of the nature of the substance? He's a 'human candle' as he so aptly put it, but what's the limit? What's the capacity? What does that mean?

On that front, what about Crocodile? Sand is a nifty power, yes, but rather limited on the open sea without an additional source. She has no doubt he's deft with it, but could there be more to it than she knows? Could there be more than he knows? Could a Logia Awaken? What would that look like?

Buggy is a Flashy Fool, the Genius Jester, but right now, she is plain old Buggy - curious, excited and itching to experiment.

She asks questions - simple ones, odd ones, gathers her data as best she can. She will not use her friends as guinea pigs, she refuses, but she's going to compile, record, and analyze everything until she has a chance to go a little science.

She's a pirate, her morals are skewed, but she will not harm innocent, good people.

Everyone else is fair game.

And with a curious clown diving into a field of research so often controlled by the Marines, it brings the expanse of misinformation, control of knowledge, and fascist tendencies to glaring light.

And Buggy the Bombastic Clown lives up to her name in unexpected ways.

The Seas learn to fear when she holds up a hand, poses her finger to snap, and smiles. Your fate is sealed, more often than not, when blood red lips stretch and damn near coo, "Boom~".

And when some information about Pluton cones to light? Well.

She's got a fascinating option to power this behemoth of a war ship. Turns out keeping the Clown in the Guild was the best decision Crocodile could have hoped for.

Buggy takes the world by storm and it turns out being a war ship's power cell isn't even the biggest thing she discovers.

[1000dactyls]

Obsessed with your hc that they all have their own unique braid pattern and Stoick does it for trans girl hiccup like it legitimately making me tear up 😭 but do you have any more tgirl hiccup trans hc? Hiccup is always kinda seen as trans masc, which yeah look at him but hardly transfemme

i do! actually, i’m working on a fic right now where i explore more tgirl hiccup and how that changes her sense of self and relationship to others. though, it’s a bit more exploratory and not as chronological as my other httyd wip, which is a canon-divergence exploring a “what-if” where hiccup doesn’t grow up on berk and is trying to find his mom, but somehow ends up in berk anyway to end the war… but i digress!!!

So here are some assorted thoughts for you :D

i do think tgirl hiccup still has stubble (she doesn’t shave every day, though it does depend on whether she can handle the sensory experience that day). In part it’s because there’s less stigma about it; i dont think berkian society cares much about girls having facial hair so long as whatever hair does exist is well-kept, and whoever that hair belongs to is alive. And if anyone says otherwise, then snotlout and the twins are there to kick their teeth in. And also because facial hair and body hair in general are just parts of our bodies and i like being able to include that…! she also has arm hair, at least the bits that survive the forge.

Initially hiccup grows her hair out, enough to put it in a ponytail, but at least by the time httyd2 rolls around it’s back to being shoulder length/short again. Long hair does not make for fun flights, as it turns out, because her hair gets REALLY tangled. Even though Astrid is very handy with a comb. And her fingers.

gothi gets this girl on estrogen. with the help of strategically placed padding/armor and the lean muscle she’s built up flying toothless, hiccup slowly begins to fill out, though she’s still scrawny and gangly and a toothpick

I think by virtue of living with a single dad (and a gobber)(lord. stoick and gobber’s bromantic/homoerotic relationship is a post for another day), Hiccup already knows how to do what are considered “womanly” chores. That being said, she isn’t particularly extraordinary at any of them — she doesn’t have Snotlout’s proficiency with needlework nor Tuffnut’s cooking skills, lacks Astrid’s finesse with laundry and Ruffnut’s clever compositions with kennings, and certainly can’t match up to the way Fishlegs manages little ones. Which is fine — her skills lie elsewhere, in the forge and with dragons. At least she can cook a decent enough meal for her and her father and Gobber, and that’s enough for their little family.

Toothless was told first and he also knew first. They’re two halves of a whole, not-so-much a girl and a dragon as they are a single entity, a We, and i think toothless would also trans his gender in solidarity/kinship but hiccup shakes her finger and is like You and I both know damn well you feel like a boy. and he’s like (chuffs)(human gender is stupid… how limiting !). One day he will be able to communicate the nuances of dragon gender to his stupid human. But for now, Hiccup will call Toothless a “boy,” and that is the limits of human language.

[suzukiblu]

Heyyyyy, who wants the expanded excerpt of that one WIP of mine with transfemme!Kon, two glorious and terrible Amazons, and familial soulmates that's behind this here read-more?? (( tw: internalized misgendering, unintentional misgendering ))

Kon just saved Lex Luthor's life, so that's kind of weird and unfortunate. Like, he's perfectly aware that Kal would've wanted him to do that and would've done it himself if he hadn't been too busy bashing on the robot minions of the latest morally dubious AI to need dropkicked out of Metropolis, but also now the whole stupid world is gonna know he's the kind of dumbass who wastes time saving Lex Luthor. 

Specifically, wastes time saving Lex Luthor in the middle of a situation that has at least an eighty-five percent chance of being Lex Luthor's own goddamn fault, just to really rub it in.  

Look, somebody had to have programmed that morally dubious AI. 

Kon can't even enjoy the fact that Luthor's currently knocked out on the ground and both of the dude's super-hot and allegedly Amazonian bodyguards are on top of him. And considering that the one's all buttoned up in a sexy chauffeur uniform with semi-sheer stockings and the other's wearing a black minidress and strappy gold stilettos under a trenchcoat, and that they're both at least six feet tall and built like, again, actual Amazons, that is a lot to not be enjoying. 

. . . although actually, he can't help but notice, they're weirdly not his type despite the fact that they're both absolutely gorgeous and also the fact that he pretty much just described the stars of at least the last three pornos he watched. 

Very weird, Kon thinks, then attempts to get out from underneath said porn star bodyguards. The chauffeur-looking one–Mercy, he thinks her name is–cuffs him upside the head, then pulls out a gun that he cannot even imagine where she was hiding and takes aim at the nearest robot. 

"Quit wriggling, brat, you'll throw off my aim," she orders, and then starts firing. 

"Aren't you supposed to be a fucking Amazon?" Kon demands incredulously. Since when the fuck do Amazons use guns? Since when is that a thing? 

"I am also not too stupid to see the benefits of high-velocity rounds," Mercy replies dryly without missing a shot. Every robot she hits immediately explodes. There is literally no reason a normal handgun should be causing that reaction, so Kon's just gonna assume that's not actually a normal handgun. 

"Always with the high-velocity rounds," the other bodyguard–Hope, Kon's pretty sure?–snorts as she strips off her trenchcoat and reveals a truly improbable amount of absolutely flawless muscle packed into that skintight minidress that Kon, again, finds bizarrely just . . . not hot, somehow? And neither is Mercy's narrow-eyed look of concentration or the fact that they're both still on top of him. 

Maybe he's coming down with something. 

Admittedly, he's pretty sure they're only on top of him to keep him pinned down to be a useful meat-shield for their currently unconscious boss's much less invulnerable body, but Kon has found people who were repeatedly bashing him in the face with an I-beam or just straight-up about to murder him hot, so . . . yeah, definitely coming down with something. There's really no other explanation. 

"Hmmm," Mercy says, eyeing the swarming robots that are very aggressively beelining for their position. Like, these robots are way too interested in their position for this whole stupid situation to not in some way be Luthor's fault, in Kon's opinion. "We need to clear some space." 

"Then you should've packed a bigger gun," Hope says dubiously, dropping her trenchcoat on Kon's head. 

"Fuck's sake," Kon mutters, then flattens his hands against the pavement, grabs every robot he can reach at once with his TTK, and rips them all to pieces in one burst. 

It's not easy, but he at least nails a pretty respectable amount of them, so he's got that much. And also, like, about a hundred-yard radius without anything that's trying to murder them in it. So that's nice. 

". . . huh," Hope says, tilting her head. 

"You're welcome," Kon snipes. "Can I get up now?" 

"No," Hope says as a fresh wave of robots rushes them. "Do it again." 

"Whatever," Kon mutters, but he does. He's got better shit to do right now than argue with alleged Amazons of unexplained origins. Taking out as many damn robots as possible, specifically. 

"That's convenient," Hope observes, inexplicably dropping a hand onto the back of Kon's neck and squeezing . . . approvingly, actually? "Good job, kid." 

And that, bafflingly, still doesn't do anything to his dick. 

Okay, so he's probably actively dying of radiation poisoning from, like, some kind of new stealth kryptonite that Luthor has in his pocket or whatever. Luthor would absolutely be the asshole to have stealth kryptonite in his pocket right now, ungrateful prick that he is. 

Kon really doesn't have time to be worrying about that right now, though, so he just grabs another group of robots with his TTK and does what comes naturally as Mercy keeps firing at the ones in the air overhead and Hope keeps her hand on the back of his neck. It . . . still isn't doing anything to him? 

Except it sort of is, just . . . not in a way that makes sense. 

Kon really doesn't have time for this. 

Mercy reloads her handgun. Hope squeezes the back of Kon's neck again. Rubs the pad of her thumb across his pulse, the gesture more absentminded than anything else. 

Kon feels weird. 

Then he rips apart every single fucking robot left on the ground. 

Which is . . . a lot of robots. 

Like. Way, way more robots than he actually should've been able to get a grip on. Or even reach. 

"Uh," Kon says, blinking stupidly. 

"Damn convenient," Hope says, then gives his neck a neat little pat of appreciation before dropping her hand away. Kon does not examine the part of himself that misses it, mostly because said part has literally nothing to do with his libido and he just can't make that fact make sense. "Mr. Luthor? You with us?" 

"Not at the moment, no," Luthor mutters from the pavement, pushing himself up carefully and dusting his suit off with a mildly annoyed expression, like they're not currently in the middle of a half-destroyed city block while innumerable robot minions and Kal and Kara are all throwing down in the sky overhead. "Hn. Is there a reason the two of you are perched on one of Superman's pet teenagers? The more annoying one, even?" 

"Convenient bullet-catcher," Mercy replies dismissively, shooting down a couple more of the aerial robots. 

"Also surprisingly obedient," Hope muses. 

"Asshole, I literally just saved your life and fucked up half an army of shitty robots to keep it saved, and as for you two, I did your fucking jobs for you, and all three of you are all gonna be shitheads to me about it?" Kon demands in exasperation. "Seriously?" 

"Seems like a reasonable source of entertainment for the afternoon," Luthor says, idly watching Mercy shoot down a few more of the airborne robots. "Given that Superman's being inconsiderately dull and not getting himself punched nearly hard enough." 

"Let me the fuck up already," Kon says flatly. 

"Oh, that hit was a slight improvement," Luthor says musingly as he gets to his own feet and finishes dusting himself off, clearly far more interested in watching Kal get knocked around by the aerial robots than anything else. Kon flips him off on principle. Mercy pistol-whips him for it. It doesn't really hurt, which bemuses him enough to lay off the rude hand gestures. She's an Amazon, probably. Almost definitely. Either way, she definitely could've made that actually hurt. 

So that's weird. 

Actually a lot of weird has been happening in this whole stupid interaction, really, which is what Kon gets for saving fucking Lex Luthor's life. 

Something explodes really loudly in the distance, which is probably the command center that Steel was supposed to be dealing with because all the remaining robots jerk violently and then drop out of the sky like rocks all at once and crash into the ground. Which–thank fuck. 

"Hm," Mercy says, holstering her gun as she glances around the smashed-up street and finally gets off Kon. "We might actually make your three o'clock, Mr. Luthor." 

"Unfortunate, given that I'm fairly certain my three o'clock is good ol' Brucie Wayne," Luthor says dryly. Hope gets up too and, absolutely inexplicably, offers Kon a hand up. He's so fucking bemused that he actually takes it, and she pulls him to his feet. "That man is absolutely unbearable." 

"Mmm, I don't know, Hope and I usually find Mr. Wayne good for a bit of afternoon delight," Mercy drawls, sounding amused. 

"Ew," Kon mutters reflexively as he lets go of Hope's hand and makes a face. Then he wonders what the fuck kind of kryptonite that stealth kryptonite is, because picturing two dangerous and gorgeous Amazons making a sandwich out of a slutty Gothamite playboy shouldn't be making him say "ew". Like, that is very literally the last thing that should ever be making him say "ew". Ever. 

Seriously, what the fuck. 

Luthor looks back over at them. 

And then he frowns. 

"Hope," he says. "Mercy." 

"Yes, sir?" Hope asks. 

"What the hell are those?" Luthor says. 

Hope and Mercy frown too. Then they look at each other. Look each other over. And . . . pause. 

"Oh," Hope says. 

"What the fuck," Mercy says. 

Kon has no idea what they're all frowning about, but whatever. An annoyed supervillain and his annoyed bodyguards are not his also-annoyed problem, at least not as long as they're not actively trying to murder Kal or blow up Metropolis or whatever. He's just gonna go make sure everybody he actually gives a shit about is okay, and then get back to–

Hope and Mercy's frowns deepen, and then they both flick their eyes towards him. 

"Bullshit," Mercy says, her eyes narrowing. 

"What, do you think it was one of the drones?" Hope asks dubiously, raising an eyebrow. 

"He's a damn man," Mercy says accusingly. "Worse, a damn boy!" 

"Excuse you?" Kon says, bristling reflexively. He's technically eighteen, okay? Or at least the rough equivalent of eighteen, whatever. 

"I will say, not quite what I pictured for either of your types," Luthor says, looking Kon over with an unimpressed expression. 

Oh, gross. 

"Annnnnd I'm out," Kon says firmly as he lifts off the ground, because Lex Luthor just checked him out and he needs to go gag now. And like, scrub the entire memory from his brain. 

Hope grabs his shoulder and shoves him back down onto his feet. 

"You're our soulmate, kid," she says matter-of-factly. Kon . . . blinks. 

"The fuck?" he says, and Hope points down at herself. He looks. There's a soulmark wrapped halfway around her right thigh, which is . . . weird, actually, because he doesn't remember her having a soulmark there earlier, especially not such a big and flashy one, and . . . 

What the fuck, Kon thinks. He looks over at Mercy and sees the exact same soulmark showing through her stockings in the exact same place on her own thigh. He doesn't remember seeing it there before either. 

It's . . . well, it's a soulmark, he guesses. It's gold–like, several different shades of gold, but all of them metallic and gleaming. He can see the shine of the mark even through Mercy's stockings. It looks like a mosaic of a stylized sun, all intricate rays and bright circles and interlocking shapes, and it takes up a hell of a lot of real estate, going all the way from just above their knees to who knows how high up under their skirts. It's . . . well, it's pretty. 

Actually, it's beautiful, and Kon kind of wants to touch it. To touch both of them, more specifically, ideally at the same time. 

And still not in the pervy way. 

So that's a bad sign, definitely. 

"Take your pants off," Mercy orders impatiently. 

"How about 'hell no'?" Kon says, because yeah he has literally no sense of shame or self-consciousness but Luthor was just eyeballing him like a weirdo and he very much does still want to go make sure nobody he gives a shit about got fucked up by a morally dubious robot or anything. And like–okay, fine, apparently he has soulmates and apparently those soulmates are both drop-dead gorgeous Amazons, but like . . . he doesn't actually give a fuck right now, and also they both work for Lex Luthor, so that kinda doesn't bode well for any kind of long-term relationship or whatever anyway? Like, this is very much about to be another Knockout scenario. Knockout in stereo, even. 

Ugh.

"I said take your pants off," Mercy repeats in annoyance. 

"Again, hell no," Kon tells her. 

Mercy grabs for his belts. Kon dodges her. 

"Hey!" he says. Mercy glowers at him. Hope folds her arms. 

"It's obviously him, Mercy," she says with a sigh. "We haven't touched anyone else but each other and Lex in at least an hour, and any of us would've triggered a mark long before now." 

"He's a child," Mercy bites off. 

"I'm eighteen, kind of!" Kon protests indignantly. If he had to forcibly lose sixteen-odd years of his natural lifespan, at least people could fucking acknowledge him as a fucking adult. Like, is that too much to ask?

"You're two," Luthor says dryly. "'Kind of'." 

"Oh, fuck you," Kon snaps, scowling at him and also not sure how he feels about the fact that the fucking weirdo actually knows how old he is. Like, why the fuck does he know that? 

"A literal child," Mercy says witheringly. "A literal child is our literal soulmate. In a V-shaped triad, of all things!" 

Honestly, if somebody'd told Kon half an hour ago that he had two soulmates and said soulmates were a pair of smoking hot older women dressed like professional escorts who could both kick his ass due to being unconfirmed Amazons, and he was the focal point of their V-shaped triad? He would have very literally needed to go have a lie-down until he recovered enough to get some bloodflow back to his brain. And it would've had to be a very, very long lie-down. 

Right now, though, it's just like . . . a thing, he guesses. A very weird thing that makes absolutely no sense whatsoever, as far as he's concerned. 

"Well, he'll mature," Hope says resignedly. "Theoretically." 

"Oh, that's a turn-on," Mercy snorts. 

"Look, whatever, I'm not into you two either but I'm not being a prick about it, am I?" Kon says in exasperation, folding his arms. 

The other three all pause. Then they all turn their heads to look at him. 

"You're not?" Luthor says, sounding mystified. "What, neither of them?" 

"Not that it's any of your damn business, but no," Kon says, wondering what his life has come to that he's actually answering the asshole supervillain right now. 

". . . you know, you could just come out to Superman, it's not actually necessary to so aggressively pretend to be straight," Luthor says dryly, raising an eyebrow at him. Kon, again, wonders how and why this weirdo knows anything about him, much less enough to have an opinion about his sexual orientation and the way he expresses it. "I mean, you'll have to put up with him 'validating your identity' every five minutes, I'm sure, but he isn't going to disown you or whatever nonsense you're expecting." 

"I'm bi, asshole, and I am out to Superman," Kon says in exasperation. Who, admittedly, did kind of spend a couple months validating his identity every five minutes after he came out to him, but that's neither here nor there. "It's possible to just not be into someone." 

"But you're not into either of them," Luthor says, eyes narrowing in consideration. "And they're your soulmates." 

". . . oh gods," Mercy says in horrified realization, putting her hands over her face and staring at Kon through her splayed fingers. "Hope. Hope, are we fucking parents?!" 

". . . huh," Hope says, tilting her head. 

Kon blinks at both of them. Then stares at both of them. 

"Are you high?" he says incredulously. "There is literally no damn way!" 

"Really? Because it'd be one thing if you weren't sexually attractive to either of them yet," Luthor says, still eyeing him assessingly. "You're barely past jailbait, physiologically speaking, and that's frankly being generous. But neither of them is sexually attractive to you?" 

"It's possible to just not be into someone!" Kon protests again. "That doesn't mean they're my moms, for fuck's sake! It could just be, I don't know, platonic or something! Or a sibling bond!" 

Not that those options aren't just as weird and doomed as a romantic bond would be, obviously, but at least they'd make more sense than a parental one would. 

"Amazons only get sister bonds, brat," Mercy says dubiously, which Kon guesses makes sense but also makes him feel a little–never mind. Never mind how it makes him feel. 

He doesn't like how it makes him feel, though. For reasons that he's just . . . not ever gonna examine. 

Ever. 

"Yeah, well, last I heard nobody ever proved you two were real Amazons anyway," he snaps back defensively, clenching his fists at his sides. 

"It's adorable that you think we care what anyone else thinks," Mercy snorts, rolling her eyes. 

Kon very literally cannot imagine just not caring what anyone else thinks to that degree. Like–not ever. 

Must be nice, though.

[sandssavvy]

I know I'll probably get flack for this, but I'm a little frustrated by how when a media company that is extremely socially progressive isn't 100% perfect in every area at all times some people start yelling for boycotts.

You can choose to spend your money however you like, and if you don't enjoy what they make that's fine. You don't need to support it.

But it feels reminiscent of other ways that the left seems to eat itself. Like people refusing to vote because 1 candidate is evil, but the other lets you down in some areas.

And I feel like a lot of the folks that call out to boycott things like Dropout, WTNV, and other media companies that are trying to be diverse and progressive are sometimes (not always) virtue signaling. A lot of those folks are watching stuff made by much less ethically made and diverse groups.

There aren't a ton of options for great media made by and starring queer folks and folks of color that aren't owned by a terrible monopoly like disney or amazon. Yet it seems like no matter what progressive media I watch someone calls for a boycott of it because of 1 or 2 issues that all of more widespread media platforms have.

I can understand that some folks want there to be more representation of some diverse populations, or more thorough research of a guest's positions on Palestine. However, I would love to know about shows/platforms that have lived up to the rigorous standards of everyone I have heard calling to boycott Dropout.

Because I don't actually know about a more progressive large media platform personally. Maybe that's my ignorance, but this is the best I know of.

Please don't dogpile on me, I recognize that people have these concerns for a reason. However, it feels like Dropout was placed on a pedestal by people, and at any misstep there is a lot of extra rage.

Also, I am hoping that no one is harassing Aabria Iyengar about any of this. It feels very bad faith to bother a queer black woman about not having enough representation at a table that has 5 people total (including her) and only 1 of them is white and 1 person is bi and nonbinary. Plus the first season was 4 eps or something, and Aabria compressing big stories.

Also, I really don't get how some of the Dungeons and Drag Queens cast aren't viewed as transfemme even tho Bob the Drag Queen is non binary and uses she/her and he/him pronouns. Monét X Change is also nonbinary and uses she/her & he/him. They both use she/her when not in drag. Alaska may also be nonbinary, but I'm not sure. Drag isn't just done by cis gay men, people.

At least people recognize Persephone Valentine as a trans woman on Dropout, but it is frustrating that people ignore that some of the queens are nonbinary and femme.

It feels a bit like when some people claim that bi folks aren't queer enough. Like nonbinary and femme is not as significant as being a trans woman to them so it doesn't count. Meanwhile gender identity is complex, and your gender & understanding of it can shift over time and they are all valid.

Not to mention there are other cast members like Mano Agapion that are nonbinary. Omar Najam also uses any pronouns.

Once again if someone can name a media platform that is more diverse and ethical than Dropout and has great quality productions and an amazing cast, let me know. I do not know of any media companies that meet a standard of perfection.

I am certainly not going to give up on one of the few platforms making a legitimate effort.

[waitineedaname]

Do u have any transfemme Jiang Cheng headcanons you’re willing to share 🥺 every time you bring it up it makes me unreasonably happy so I would love to hear more about it 🫶🫶

AHHHH no really major headcanons, it's just something I like to rotate in my mind a lot! transfemme jiang cheng is. so special to me. I guess I have a few thoughts

I think a big part of Jiang Cheng's relationship to gender comes from Jiang Fengmian and Yu Ziyuan being the models of masculinity and femininity growing up. Jiang Cheng already relates a Lot to Yu Ziyuan, and I think if JC is transfemme, it's a big deal to her that Yu Ziyuan wields so much power. She's an incredible cultivator, a fierce fighter, and generally is a force to be reckoned with. At the same time, she's still a woman living in a misogynistic society. YZY would probably make a better sect leader than JFM, but she's a woman and his wife, and therefore he gets the final say in things

This in turn I think affects Jiang Cheng's feelings about gender and being sect leader. Jiang Cheng has a tendency to prioritize sect concerns > personal desires, and I think in this situation, masculinity is seen as a tool. Even if she knows privately that she is a woman, she would not be public about it because she's already in a precarious position being such a young sect leader. She needs all the respect she can get when rebuilding the Jiang sect, so she stays in the closet by choice. She might eventually come out years and years later, once the Jiang sect is stable and she knows she's not going to get fucked over, but that's really not her first priority

I do think she tells her siblings, though. Jiang Yanli is probably the first person she tells, and she's endlessly supportive. Wei Wuxian is kind of clueless about this sort of thing (see: not realizing he liked men until he got resurrected into the body of a gay man) but he loves Jiang Cheng so he'd be supportive, especially if he learned when they were both still kids. Of course, this makes the tragedy of Jiang Cheng losing everyone even worse. After her siblings died, there was no one who knew who she really was. Thank god for resurrections, huh? fucking hell

in a modern au, I think being a woman would fix her. She would be able to come out without all the other bullshit to worry about, and I think it would be very healing for her. I've known a number of people to go on estrogen who said the effects were more emotional than physical, and I think HRT would be so good for her. I just need Jiang Cheng to be happy goddammit. has she not been through enough

that got long. I guess I had more thoughts than I expected lsdkjflksdjf I also have a snippet from a modern au wip that I don't know if I'll ever continue/finish, but I'll put it under a read more bc I find it funny. I think Wen Qing should crack Jiang Cheng's egg, as a treat <3

Wen Qing knew Jiang Cheng too well. It was something he both loved and hated. There were very few people outside his family that could see through his blustering and read him for who he was, and Wen Qing was one of them. Hell, she was better at it than his own brother.

She didn't hesitate to call him on it either. He wouldn't be forgetting the way she'd looked at him after he introduced her to his parents and told him this explains a lot about you. Rude. Correct, but rude.

Because she knew him so well, she knew the best times to drop these bombs on him. Exposing him when he was in the wrong mood might make his temper flare, or it might make him curl into an insecure ball. Neither were reactions he liked having around her.

Wen Qing knew the best time to drop revelations on him was when he was happy and as close to relaxed as he could get, which is of course why she apparently decided the best time to bring up this particular bombshell was when he was floating in postcoital bliss.

“I'm going to tell you something,” Wen Qing said, her ankle still hooked gently around his calf. “You can't freak out about it.”

Jiang Cheng paused in the middle of pressing lazy kisses to her temple, heart rate immediately spiking. “Now?” he said, incredulous and a little whiny. 

“It's not a bad thing,” she reassured him, gently scratching his scalp. It relaxed him like a charm, though he was still suspicious. “Do you promise to listen?”

“Do I have much of a choice?” he asked, propping himself up on her chest. Her lips quirked in a smile as she looked down at him.

“I think you're a woman,” she said, direct and matter-of-fact.

Jiang Cheng jolted upright so hard he slammed his head into the headboard. Wen Qing frowned and sat up as he rolled off her. “You're going to give yourself a concussion,” she said, accusatory.

“You're insane!” Jiang Cheng said, attempting to sit upright without making his head swim. Wen Qing huffed and pushed him down with a firm hand to his chest. He could throw her off if he wanted to, but, well, he didn't want to. He rather liked it when she pushed him around and climbed on top of him like she was right now, pinning him in place and preventing him from running away from the conversation.

[somethingmissingthiswaycomes]

I just read a post I would have liked to reblog for some points, but not for others — so I think I'll just muse about it in my own post.

The post was about the dichotomy of TME and TMA — terms I at first accepted without thought and then began to criticize and eventually grew annoyed with, then saw them as a straight up red flag because of how big the center circle of the Venn diagram seems to be between people who use those terms regularly online and people who use them to disparage trans people who were assigned female at birth. The crossover with people who use insults like "theyfab" seemed to be pretty big too. And it's inaccurate of course; you can't say anyone is transmisogyny exempt based on an innate aspect of their identity. And people who use TME as an insult (seemingly anyone who used it at all) seem to all be hateful about transmascs having terms like transandrophobia to describe their experiences.

But the post that made me muse right now started out saying that yes, it's not precise, it's not fully accurate, but there's something experienced in perpetuity by transfemmes, assigned male at birth, that isn't experienced by anyone who can convincingly assert that they're not trans women — and TMA is trying to reach for that, and transmisogynists wouldn't grant us any language to describe our experiences.

I've been wrong a lot about fundamental things, and realizing where I've been wrong tends to start with a feeling that there's something I'm trying to reject, because it's uncomfortable to me or violates my previous worldview. Learning I was trans, learning about plurality, the process of noticing transandrophobia within the trans community... and long before that, when I lost the faith I'd been raised in and came to recognize it as highly damaging. It's deeply unpleasant for these shifts to happen.

I've been getting a feeling like that lately, but I wasn't sure where it was placed exactly. Each time I notice a problem with my worldview, I get more cautious about what possible new problems could crop up. It makes things, well, more uncomfortable.

Anyway, this one post I'm mulling over phrased things in a way that made me start looking more closely at what it is I've been avoiding. Because my mistrust of people who talk about TMAs and TMEs came alongside a rising pride and solidarity in transmasculinity, and a frustration with people who deny the trans community language by calling us "transandrophobia truthers" and other closed-minded, bigoted nonsense. (It's so fucking frustrating.) So... I haven't been looking for discussions about the terms TMA/TME outside of the hateful context it was showing up for me in.

And this post I'm mulling over mentioned requiring language to talk about experiences, and that clicked. It clicked with me that, while there are a whole lot of people playing boys v girls 2.0 in all this, there's an underlying need to be able to discuss the unique experiences that come with every aspect of who and what we are — and we're trying to categorize, categorize, categorize.

Part of what made me decide not to engage with the post that made me start talking about this is that the OP brought up the idea of transfeminine people who were assigned female at birth... and how that's, to them, a ridiculous idea. The thing is, it's not, and accepting that is part of not overcategorizing. It's an unusual thing, but it's real, and it can mean different things. You can't restrict the type of people who can exist.

But it's true that there are experiences specific to one's assigned gender (like AMAB) and to one's physiological reality associated with it that, in an intersection with a specific or adjacent actual gender (like trans woman, transfeminine, or transneutral with perceived femininity), are important to recognize as, for the most part, unique.

My ability to be specific here breaks down, though, because I know from reading the words of certain intersex people that a lot of the intersection of transfeminine and perisex AMAB isn't actually unique unless you ignore intersex people. I don't think I can say more than that. I don't think I can get nuanced enough.

But I can use an "opposite" example to try to draw a parallel. Because there is an AFAB trans experience that isn't shared by perisex trans people who were assigned male at birth: the risk of pregnancy, and specifically restrictions on bodies with uteruses. That's a difference that TERFs like to prey on to drive a wedge in the trans community. They like to convince us that they're the only ones who care about that part of our lived experiences. That is wrong. And we shouldn't let that difference divide us.

In the same vein, we shouldn't let that difference being something that could divide us turn the topic into one that trans people who have uteruses need to sacrifice in order to stand together with trans people who don't. I think that's contributed to transmasculine erasure. The assertion that it must be so would fall under the umbrella of transandrophobia, a much needed term for the sake of discussing that.

Now back to transmisogyny affected/exempt. An argument I've often shared and agreed with and been fervent about is that it's just recreating the AFAB/AMAB binary. And I have seen people argue that no it's not, it's different, but in recognizing how often it's used that way by bad actors, I decided to ignore that argument. I'd say it doesn't matter; it may as well be that.

I think I've been wrong. And I've known I was wrong, in the back of my mind, for a while. My initial acceptance of the TMA/TME dichotomy had me making that same argument, so it felt like something I had moved beyond. Now I'm letting myself look at it more closely, I'm coming to a less accepting-it-on-faith understanding of the argument.

I'm also forming a new way of explaining my own experiences as a genderfluid person. Hopefully doing so will help to articulate what I'm thinking;

I am, currently, TME. Not in the literal sense that I don't experience transmisogyny at all, but in the sense of, "I have a body that allows me to avoid and avert transmisogyny directed explicitly at my person." I'm affected by transmisogyny in a lot of ways I've been working through for some time now, and it's for that reason that I still await better terms for this concept—but using these terms as I believe good faith actors do, while I'm not exempt from transmisogyny in general, I am TME.

But I won't always be.

I am a genderfluid person who was assigned female at birth. I started testosterone a few years back, and then I stopped because I wasn't sure how far I wanted to take it. I've been coming to terms with the fact that I need to go further and I may have to be on HRT indefinably to be able to be my full, real self... but I'm still also a woman. And it will cause me dysphoria if I can't present as a woman at times when my body has been fully affected by testosterone.

I don't know if I'll be able to be stealth in any direction. I will be affected by transmisogyny in a way I'm not right now. The difference between how I'm affected by transmisogyny now and how I will be then can, at the moment, be communicated with "I'm TME now, but I'll be TMA when I transition."

And that terrifies me, honestly. I had recognized that terror as being me internalizing transmisogyny, but not as me being afraid of it. I know I'll be more comfortable with myself, but...

The forms of transmisogyny experienced specifically by people who are perpetually perceived as male (or "supposed to be male") while presenting as female are more scary than what I experience now.

And that is worth being able to talk about.

And that is worth having a term for.

And I suppose "TME" and "TMA" are the terms people are using right now, at least online. Imprecise language is something we have to work around sometimes.

I do hope that the discussion can evolve language that doesn't so easily allow bad actors to use otherwise potentially useful terms as a weapon of lateral bigotry.

And, in general, I hope the discussion can move in a direction that discourages that more by rejecting separation of trans people into boxes based on AGAB without erasing experiences that come with AGAB. Categories are good and useful to a point — but not as boxes so much as colors we're painted with. You can't split people into groups based on any one category they're colored with without forcing some people within those groups to de-prioritize something else they are.

...

This feels like it could be a draft for a real good blog post, but I know I won't post it if I wait and try to rewrite things later, so it'll have to be the finished thing.

It's been a while since I tried to add to the conversation like this. Gonna turn my anons off in case of problems. I am OUT of spoons and won't be able to respond to any opinion about this, but feel free to say things anyway if you're nice.

[shera-dnd]

So to pass the time lately I played through Lies of P for the first time

And of course, me being me, I proceeded to make everything about the game gay

Tho what started as just "I think Carlo and Romeo are exes" and "Eugenie needs a girlfriend" turned into an actual honest to fuck queer reading after that final boss fight

tl;dr: Lies of P is to trans femmes what original Pinocchio is for trans mascs

but to explain my insanity I'm gonna have to spoil the shit out of the game soooooo you've been warned

Okay so for the sake of simplicity I'm gonna refer to Geppetto's son as Carlo and to the protagonist of the game as P. I know they have literally the same soul, but they don't share memories and don't seem to share a sense of identity, so I'm gonna treat them as different people here

Also it's important for The Symbolism, so bear with me here

So our dear P is this new person who is slowly building a sense of identity for himself, this being represented by you slowly growing more human the more you do certain things in the game

Like enjoying music, and lying to people

You know, normal human stuff

This eventually leads to one of the first big changes in P's character design. P grows his hair out, much to Geppetto's frustration.

Because P no longer looks like Carlo. He's starting to differentiate himself from the person Geppetto expects his son to be.

This tension between P's growing sense of self, and Geppetto's expectation for P to just turn into this image he has of Carlo, just continues to escalate

Culminating on the final boss fight against The Nameless Puppet

Carlo's corpse being used by Geppetto to claim back his son's soul

And that's when the old man says a line that makes me rethink who P and Carlo are

"This freedom isn't for you. It's for Carlo"

and you know, there's something about how to claim your freedom and keep your soul, you have to fight and defeat your own masculine body, which is being puppeteered by your controlling father, who has very strong opinions about who you're supposed to be

ESPECIALLY when said father keeps calling you a male name that is no longer yours

ESPECIALLY ESPECIALLY when the very first thing you do after that is sacrifice yourself so that your soul can be reborn in a feminine body

And like okay maybe this could be interpreted as kinda bad, because the way you unlock this ending is by lying through your teeth repeatedly, so it could kinda imply that P's new identity is a lie

But you gotta remember that nearly every lie she tells are just white lies to help people deal with a miserable fucking situation. And the only lies she tells about herself are all for the sake of self preservation

Like her first lie is her trying to get the security systems of the hotel from killing her

And her last lie is her telling her dad she trusts him

In the end P feels like a transfemme with a very strained relationship to her father, who still only sees her as "Carlo", the son he insists she should be.

Honestly there's probably a lot to be said about P and Carlo's relationship to Romeo, as well as Sophia's role in this story, but I'd need to play through the game again to get all the specific interactions aaaaand I don't feel like playing a video game twice back to back

fucking sue me

Anyways Lies of P is good and very easily read as queer, and you guys should definitely try it

[okadaizoirl]

i think i've gotten to a point where if anyone consistently uses any indicator of AGAB to refer to a whole group of diverse people i just can't follow them anymore. i can't fucking play this game anymore. you fools, trans people are being effected. trans people are being targeted. all of us. we all experience oppression, it takes many forms, but we do. we are meant to HELP each other, to UPLIFT each other, not to recreate what cis people made up to torture themselves--

LEAVE BIOESSENTIALISM BEHIND. 'GENDERED SOCIALIZATION' IS NOT TRUE TO INDIVIDUAL LIVED EXPERIENCES. WE ARE ALL SUFFERING.

we have to help each other. that starts with listening to each other. i owe every step of my gender realization to trans women. if a trans woman is in need of mutual aid, i donate what i can. if a trans woman is facing baseless accusations, i have the critical thinking skills to know she's the one in need of defense and/or comfort. i don't stand for any kind of misogyny. i have listen, i continue to listen to the women i know.

i can count on one finger how many people didn't dismiss me with either "that's how men are" or "this is what you signed up for" when i confided my own struggles in them with my journey. i have only had male privilege with complete strangers and ONLY after months on HRT.

and it crumbles the minute i say "husband", and suddenly my curly hair and friendly demeanor makes those strangers suddenly question themselves: "is this a faggot?". not a man, not a woman, these people have wondered aloud, in front of me, "is it a he or a she?".

or it crumbles the minute my manager-on-duty sees my legal name and starts asking me invasive questions about my medical history. i lose any privilege i had the second i have to show my fucking license-- i can't change my legal name yet, and don't want to change my gender marker until much later.

why don't i want to change that marker? I DON'T WANT TO GAMBLE WITH DEATH, AND TRANS MEN HAVE BEEN REFUSED WOULD-BE-LIFESAVING CARE AND DIED, JUST FOR THAT.

AND I KNOW TRANS WOMEN HAVE TOO. TRANS PEOPLE HAVE THIS STRUGGLE.

trans people all face misogyny. trans people all face transphobia. there is nuanced difference in transmisogyny and transandrophobia, and trans women/transfemmes and trans men/transmascs should have the right to speak on it for themselves. we should have the right to coin a term to call it. we should have the right to theory.

this does not give any of us the right to use those concepts to recreate the worst part of cis society, fucking gender wars.